Funny shit to say on facebook

I had a wonderful childhood. I couldn't have asked for a better one. My parents, brother, family, ... so much love in my life.
As I got older, I started to become exposed to the harsh realities of life. The people closest to me and the ones I loved the most started to get sick and pass away. I lost my dog. Life wasnt the same. And later, was diagnosed with Crohns which had a massive impact on my life and self confidence. I felt like a lab rat.. so many tests, doctor visits, medicine, diets, needles, ... eventually extensive surgery.
Luckily, after years of torture, I made it out ok. I started to build back my confidence, and was optimistic about the future. Before I knew it, I met the love of my life. I felt so extremely lucky to have you in my life. It felt like a dream. I felt that after all that pain and loss, I had finally had something good happen to me.
As time we on, we became best friends. You confessed your love to me, said I was different than all the rest, and you saw a future with me. You expressed how special I was to you. I felt the same way.
We met eachothers families, who became so close with eachother. I truly loved your family, they felt like home. My family loved you so much... my parents loved you like a daughter, and I knew you loved them too. We had everyone's support and love. We were the golden couple. We grew and experiences so much together. Bought our first house, saw the world, new jobs, school, ... Everyone was so proud of us, and we were proud of eachother.
Somewhere along the way, you started seeking outside the relationship for attention. I knew you were very social, so at first, I was happy to see you making friends. I knew you had a difficult childhood and past, and didn't have many good friends, so I was very supportive and encouraged you to do things with your friends.
We were inseparable. Always going things together, planning trips, going on adventures. Everything was easy. We enjoyed eachothers company so much. We made eachother laugh, feel loved, and safe. We were so comfortable and open, goofy with eachother, and always so intimate.
We shared a lot of the same hobbies: plants/garden, camping, trails, video games, movies, travel, outdoors, relaxing at home, ... it didn't seem to matter what we were doing, we were happy together.
I loved making you smile and laugh. I loved seeing you happy doing what you loved, or eating a meal I'd prepare for you.
I always wanted you to have the best. Since you were in school, I provided for you. Food, toys, restaurants, trips, ... whatever you wanted. I wanted to give you the world. It felt so good to make you happy.
You would tease me and hint towards wanting to get engaged. After 3 years, it happened. We were so happy, and you were so excited and happy to share the big news. We started planning our wedding, moved into a bigger house, new jobs, everything felt good.
I never expected to love someone so much. This young woman brought so much love, happiness, and adventure into my life. She completed changed everything. Everything was so easy.. effortless.. felt right.
When we moved into your dream home, things became more stressful. The house needed a lot of work, as well as the property. Regardless, we were willing and eager to tackle projects together and were excited to make things our own.
As time went on, and school/work seemed to become more stressful for you, I was left finishing a lot of our projects and maintaining them by myself. I also stepped up and started trying to take on more of the chores and responsibilities so that you could focus on school/work and still have time to relax. I was happy to help give you some relief.
After a few months, your brother asked to be our roommate for a time. I was hesitant, but you encouraged me that it would be a good thing. He would pay and help around the house. At first, it was nice. However, as time we on, it became more and more stressful.
The stress of doing everything and having a roommate that didn't mesh well with us overwhelmed me. I knew it was temporary, so I endured it.
One day, you came home from your new job and expressed what a good day you had.. that you had the chance to work with a different doctor, and that he was very fun and nice. I was so happy to hear it, since I knew you hadn't been having good days and people had been difficult. I was glad you seemed to have a mentor.
You started to have more good days than bad, working with this person more and more. You started talking to me about them more, sharing things you learned and talked with him about. As time went on, I started to feel a bit jealous. You had been spending more time with this person than me... your shifts were long, and I hadn't been seeing you as much. You started even talking to our parents about this person.
I started to notice you texting him while we were at home together. I'd ask, and you'd happily share whatever it was you guys were talking about. One evening, you were texting this doctor late at night. I approached you about this, and expressed how it was making me feel. I felt that it had started to become too much, and wasn't appropriate. I didn't like the idea of this older married man communicating with my young fiance so much. I expressed that I was happy that you had a friend at work, but felt that it was becoming too personal and inappropriate. You tried to reassure me that you were just friends, and that he was old and married, you would never be attracted to him. I stood firm and expressed that I would like for you to only communicate while at work, or for work related matters. You agreed and assured me it was nothing.
As time went on, I noticed you would sometimes hide your phone, turn it away, flip it upside down, or turn it off as I walked by. At first, I thought it was just me being paranoid. But as time went on, it started to mess with my head... otherwise, everything was good, so I told myself it was nothing. You started to enjoy that type of work and decided to join his practice. I was happy you were able to make up your mind and find something you enjoyed. Time went on. At some point, you needed an invasive procedure done... and you requested that doctor complete it. I didn't love the idea, but you preferred to have someone do it that you trusted. After that, the doctor seemed to be a thing of the past.
As the wedding date approached, the excitement increased. We had everything planned out and we were so excited for our big day. I saw how happy you were throughout the whole process. I couldn't believe our big day was right around the corner.
Our wedding was like a dream. Everything came together so nicely. We had the best night of our lives. I loved seeing you so happy with our friends and family there to celebrate with us. We went on a wonderful honeymoon and I felt so loved and appreciated.
Once we returned home, our roommate left, and stress started to decrease dramatically in the house. I was so relieved. You finished school, graduated, and I threw you a big surprise party to celebrate. I had always put together parties for all your special occasions, and I knew you really appreciated that. After so many nights helping you study, it felt wonderful to see you walk across that stage and finally finish.
You shortly after moved to a different hospital, and seemed to really like your new job and everyone there. Life was so good...
The house and our list of responsibilities and all the maintenance was still a lot, but I felt we were quickly starting to knock things off our list.
One week, you started working a lot... I hardly saw you that week. We'd always text and check in, saying we loved eachother, missed eachother, and looked forward to seeing eachother. When the weekend finally arrived, you had mentioned your best friend invited you to join her for girl time. I realized you hadn't seen her much lately and encouraged it.
That weekend, my grandmother had been struggling. I felt alone in our big house and had wished you were there. We checked in on eachother while you were gone. I was expecting you to return one evening, so I had dinner prepared. I was hurt when you didn't arrive and decided to stay another night with your friend.
When I saw you the next morning, I was feeling pretty down. I was already sad about my grandmother, but also felt like an after thought that week. You were so happy to see me, which was nice. We had a nice evening, spent time together, .. you never stopped telling me you loved me.
The next day after work, I got home, and you seemed so cold and distant. You seemed bothered by something. I checked in, asked if you needed anything, then went about my day. It seemed like you wanted space. I checked in every few hours, and you were busy doing something on your laptop.
I prepared dinner and started watching TV. I encouraged you to take a break, eat, and relax some before bed. You joined me on the couch, but was quiet and explained that you had some work to finish.
As it got late, I went up to bed. You explained you'd be up a little longer while you finished your work. As the hours went by, I thought it was so odd that you weren't in bed yet. I knew you had to get up early... sleep was always such a priority. I got up to check on you and to get some water. You were still on your laptop.. I noticed you were looking at rooms to something. I encouraged you to get some sleep. You joined me, looking exhausted.
We cuddled, said we loved eachother, then fell asleep. The next morning, I finished getting ready for work while you slept. As I was getting ready to leave, I sae your laptop. I decided to check and see what you were looking at... another air bnb for a trip? I was curious. We shared the laptop, so I didn't feel like I was invading her privacy.
I opened the laptop and saw apartments. I was so confused. I checker her email.. apartments. I noticed she had Facebook messenger up with recent messages. I checked... my world turned upside down. Those seconds felt like eternity as my heart sounded and my stomach sank. I read a message to a friend saying she wanted a divorce, never loved me, felt like a stranger in her house, dreaded coming home to me, ... that she loved a doctor.. he's married, but his wife is a lesbian. That was easily the worst moment of my life. I panicked and didn't know what to do... I was in shock. After a few minutes, I decided to address this with you.
I quietly walked up the stairs, sat on the edge of the bed, and calmly woke you up. You were sleepy, asking why I woke up.. you still had about 30m before work. I apologized for waking you.. As I looked at you silently, I started to cry. I quietly said "I know...". "I saw the messages". She looked back at me in shock.. eyes wide in the dark. I asked if she had been having an affair. She said no.. then started to look at me as if I wad a stranger. It was a terrible feeling.
You got up to get ready for work, and said we'd talk later that evening. You left. I was standing in the driveway and felt sick. I wasn't sure if I could make it to work.. but being at the house was making me feel worse, so I left. I didn't eat anything that while day. While at work, I prepared myself for our talk.
When we both got home, you pulled up to the house and started to pack some things while I sat on the couch. When you finally joined me, you were quiet.. asked about my day, I asked about yours.. then more silence. I asked what you needed from me. You explained that you were feeling very anxious, and didn't want me to get upset. You said you were going to stay with a friend for a few days to clear your head and wanted to talk once we were both rested.
You left for almost a week while I stayed in our big empty house, taking care of our pets, and completely confused and dead inside. I hardly ate or slept. I desperately started reading and watching whatever information I could find to help explain what was happening and to prepare myself. I spent most of my time thinking, reflecting on our life. I started tonrealize how stressed I had been... and thought about all the things I should/could have done differently. I knew I treated her so well, but no one is perfect.
Looking back, I started to think about all the red flags. Love is blind. I truly loved, trusted, and cared for this person more than anyone in the world. I thought she felt the same way... I never imagined us seperating.
I started to think of that doctor she used to talk about.. and realized she probably never stopped talking to him. I started to realize that my wife had stopped opening up to me... was no longer emotional or vulnerable... her emotional? affair started to kill the emotional intimacy between us.
I was happy just to have her in my life and enjoyed just being with her... she never expressed or talked about being unhappy... if I had known, I feel certain that we could have fixed whatever was lacking. I would have met whichever needs werent being met.
Were you lonely while I was busy working hard for us? Was she bored? I would have happily planned more outings... whenever I suggested something, you expressed that you were tired or didn't show interest. I knew you enjoyed time alone, so I never felt bad doing my own thing. I figured you would tell me of you needed or felt something...
I was so confused... started to question what was real. When did this all start? Why? How? Terrible thoughts entered my mind... so many late shifts, staying the night at the hospital, leaving early to get the air bnbs ready, ...
I also realized that towards the end, you had suddenly started to listen to different music, got a nose piercing, tattoo, talked about signing up for a sport, working out, ... these were all things I knew you had wanted to do for awhile, but it was all so sudden.
Why didn't you ever communicate... I recall you expressing your concern with my stress, but nothing else. I felt that my stress was reasonable considering everything I was doing.. and knew it was temporary. I didn't ignore it though. I saw a therapist, and started making changes. Was it all too late?
When we finally spoke again, it was so nice to just see you. We sat and you were so friendly and sweet - it reassured me that everything was going to be ok. We made small talk and joked, which immediately lightened the mood. You suggested I spoke first. I expressed my feelings and how important the marriage was.. that I'd so anything to save it. I took responsibility for my side of things and expressed the changes I had made and would continue to make. When you started, you expressed that you would always cherish our time together, but we're set on divorce. That we both deserved to be truly happy. Shortly after, you left.
The days after, you started packing your things while I was at work. I was living in a big empty house, every day getting more and more empty. I was a complete mess living in hell. Her family started to reach out to me and shower me with support, apologies, and disbelief. No one could make sense of this.
After a week or so, I couldn't take it any more, so I moved to stay with my parents while we finished moving out. I attempted to stay cordile through all this. You seemed so unphased and happy... texting me and talking to me like we were still best friends.
You explained that you felt bad for saying you never loved me... that you did, but not in the way a wife should love their husband. That it could be years, but in the future, I could count on you.
As time went on, and the pain increased, I was more distant. You texted more and more. Finally, I suggested that we limit communication unless she was interested in working on our marriage.
As the days went by, you grew colder and irritated.. I started to feel like the bad guy. I know you started to feel the weight of your decisons, and starred to project onto me. Making me the bad guy made you feel better. I attempted to end things on a good note... being helpful throughout the move out process, but you were so cold. It hurt so much... 5 wonderful years tossed aside like it never mattered.
I havent talked to you in weeks... I miss my best friend, my love, your family, our pets, and the wonderful life we built. I'm left trying to pickup the pieces. I feel so lost, confused, broken, ...
The tremendous amount of support I've gotten from both sides has helped a lot. I'm seeing a therapist, reading a lot, eating more, working out, and focusing on my self. The days are getting better, but I still have days where I am a mess.
I havent been sleeping well... always tired. Waking up several times, terrible nightmares and thoughts of you being with another man... I still have believe you would be capable of all this.. of hurting me so much.
I have urges to reach out to you... wanting to fix this, that there must be a misunderstanding... there are so many things I'd like to say. I got complacent and comfortable during our time together. I stopped doing the little things as often as I used to... I never meant to hurt you, make you feel lonely, unloved, unappreciated, ... whatever it is you felt. It's difficult for me to accept that my sweet innocent wife was capable of this... surely there was a reason?? I was just so caught up in my list of things... I was working so hard for our future.
I feel like my wife was manipulated by this man... why does an older doctor (20 years older) have a lesbian wife? He doesn't love her like she seems to think... he is using her. I feel sorry for her... I know there is no future there.
I've done a lot of reading on Attachment Styles, Limerence, love addiction, and other things that come as a result of childhood trauma. I feel like a lot of this has to do with her trauma... but also her selfishness and emotional immaturity. There is nothing I can do. I just pray she figures things out on her own, finds longlasting happiness, and puts an end to this cycle.
I would love it if we were able to reconnect in the future... I still deeply love and care for her. I don't want our story to end... none of this feels right. My gut is screaming that this is all wrong. I just know we both need to work on ourselves for the time being.
One day I had it all, the next, it crashed down before my eyes. Meeting you was the best thing to happen to me... you leaving was the worst. You rushed out of my life so quickly... I wish things were different.

I have a crack theory as to why the bridal party ended up being such a shit show: we’re currently watching james walk all over Shannon’s “once in a lifetime” event and she’s such a doormat she happily lets him do it.
So for months now, we’ve seen and heard taylor and Shannon yap about planning SHANNON’S bridal shower. We’ve also seen both women attend bridal showers, even quite recently.
Bridal showers are traditionally held to celebrate a BRIDE and the groom doesn’t attend, or if he does he’ll come in at the end to say hi.
A few days before the “shower” it’s suddenly being referred to as a bridal soirée. James is posting cringe reels like “get ready with me for MY bridal soirée” (side note, does he not realize he’s calling himself a bride??) then continues to go on about how bridal soirées aren’t a thing in England.
Lo and behold after it’s all said and done, the bridal shower turned out to be much closer to a wedding showeengagement party (albeit a shoddily planned one). So why would they not phrase it that way from the beginning?? Why a bridal shower?
My theory is james didn’t know that a bridal shower is a party solely meant to celebrate THE BRIDE and threw a major hissy fit a few days before demanding to be included(remember, they were both oddly silent on social media and he didn’t stay with her as she recovered from surgery).
Shannon did what Shannon does and let this man trash one of the single times a bride should feel like the most important person in the room and be celebrated by her friends and family. I would confidently bet that this party was intended to be a bridal shower, planned as such, until the last minute when james took over as queen bee, going so far as to call it HIS (not even our) bridal shower. This is further evidenced by the fact that only her mom attended, not her dad. Because, again, this was supposed to be a time for Shannon to feel celebrated by the women in her life. It could also be (partially) why it seemed so thrown together- it was originally planned for half the amount of people that actually ended up going and the men/significant others were asked to come last minute.
This man will never let her shine or have her moment and she’s a moron for putting up with his petty shit

So my best friend and I decided that we could no longer dance around the fact that we have effectively been in a relationship for years and decided that we needed to formally acknowledge it and try out what it would be to take our relationship to the next/more official level.
She has had a fairly serious medical condition for most of the time I have known her and earlier in the year she decided to have an experimental procedure the attempt to correct the issue. It was a very difficult recovery for her and I supported her as best I could through the process and initial recovery as she was able to get back on her feet and get back to work. We have always been very close and many times I was the only person she did not ice out when she just needed a break.
She had her appointment and even told me that she thought it would be bad news and didn't know if she would be up to talking afterwards. I live half way between her appointment and home and told her if she decided to make the trip home that she could stop in and I would make her dinner to break up her drive - I knew she would say no but I wanted to offer. I sent her a text that night trying to check in then called her the next evening and she said she didn't feel like talking which I respected. I waited a few more days then followed up on our trip plans because if we were going to go I needed to book the place we would be staying. She said that as much as she wanted to say yes her world had been turned upside down and that she needed time and I told her that I kinda figured but wanted to confirm and that I would be here when she's ready.
Admittedly, at this point my mind went to the worst place - heart failure - because I knew the other outcomes she expected and this had to be worse than those. I told her a few days later that after thinking about it I was going to still plan on going and that if she wanted to the invitation was open - I wanted her to know if she needed a break to disappear for a while she could. She reiterated that she needed space and that maybe this wasn't the best timing to take this step for us (not outright saying we need to take a step back but there was the implication of it clearly which is fine if thats what she needs). I told her that whatever we are - or whatever we will be - we will figure it out and be fine. This wasn't about that, it was about her needing a break and that I will be here when she gets back.
We talked pretty much every day before the appointment and then after it we haven't spoken much because I want to give her space and time. She never told me what the doctor said which I was initially okay with and knew she would when she was ready. Then I get online last night and see that she posted the whole thing on Facebook and announced the results there. AITA for being hurt/upset that she announced it to the world without telling me?

This is going to be long, apologies in advance… And thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this.
A few days ago, I approached my HM with my frustrations over not having a set schedule (my on-duty hours often fluctuate depending on the family’s needs on the day of). I am extremely disappointed in her response, and am seriously considering leaving early as a result.
Honestly, I also just really need to rant about this to anyone who might have some experiencing either hosting au pairs or participating in an au pair exchange who can provide some insight. For context, the au pair regulations of the country I am staying in do not allow au pairs to work more than 30 hours per week (6 hours maximum per day) and mandate 1.5 days off per week. While I don’t think any of these rules are technically being broken, I am really frustrated, disappointed, and upset at my current situation. Also important to note is that my contract does not specify exact hours of work (my own fault/oversight, apparently).
Without revealing any personal details about the HF for privacy’s sake, I want to share a little bit about what my agreed-upon versus actual duties were/are.
The household duties that were discussed during the video interview(s) were: * Assisting with breakfast in the mornings and helping the children get ready for school/daycare. * Accompanying the youngest to daycare. * Washing, hanging, and folding the children’s laundry. * Maintaining order in the youngest’s playroom (which is also the main living area). * Cooking lunch for the family twice a week. * Preparing a simple dinner for the children on a daily basis. * A weekly house-clean, together. * Groceries, as needed. * Tidying the youngest’s room with her at the end of each day. * Loading and unloading the dishwasher.
Additional household duties I have been tasked with since arriving: * Vacuuming mouse shit from behind bookshelves and inside the children’s play drawers (once). * Releasing caught mice into the nearby green space from the household live traps (three times). * Cleaning the cat shit from the outdoor sandbox (once). * Taking the recycling to the local depot (regularly). * Washing, hanging, and folding the entire family’s laundry (regularly). * Dropping off and picking up the family’s dry cleaning (seldom). * The kitchen has been assigned to me as “my area of responsibility”. This means that the family often leaves their dishes on the counter as well as pots and pans on the stove from when they cook, regardless of if I have eaten with them or not. I am also sometimes tasked with random kitchen-related duties. For example, taking out the pots and pans to vacuum the drawers, or cleaning the windows. * On a few occasions, the family has had guests on my designated lunch days. I have also cooked for these guests (1-2 extra adults).
My weekday hours are generally 6:30am to 8:30am and 4:00pm to 7:00pm. As I mentioned, these hours often fluctuate. For example, sometimes one of the parents takes the youngest to daycare, which means I’m only on-duty until 8:00am. Twice a week, the youngest also has programming, which I have come to understand does not constitute my “working hours” in their eyes. This mean that while I pick her up from daycare and walk her to her program, the hour that she is actually in the program is considered my “off” time.
Approximately twice a week, I also return home mid-day to cook lunch for the family. I budget about 1 hour for this, not including grocery shopping, which I often do on the way to/from the daycare. I also mop and vacuum the entire home, with the exception of the parents’ study rooms, once a week. By necessity, I do this when the children are out of the house (so also during the day).
This means that my weekdays include between 4 and 6 hours of “work” hours across a 12 hour window. I have been given the flexibility to complete the above tasks whenever I want, so I typically spread these out throughout the week in order to maintain some balance between my workdays. The days I am responsible for cooking on are decided on at the start of the week, and sometimes change mid-week if the parents schedules change (typically communicated on the day-of). Based off this, I’d say I typically work about 25 hours between Monday to Friday.
Now, weekends:
I have one day off per week. Up until now, this has been respected and I appreciate that. The family has noted that either Saturday or Sunday works well for them, as long as we consult with each other on plans before I choose the day to take. I feel that this is a really nice approach,
BUT…
Alongside my sporadic weekly schedule, I am really struggling with what is supposed to be my other half day “off”. For example, let’s say Saturday is my full day off and Sunday is my half day off. I am given little to no structure/expectation for when I will be watching the children beyond things like “a little in the morning” and “a little in the afternoon/evening”. I feel that I’ve really had to push for even a general realm of what hours I need to be on-duty for. Oftentimes, I am told that my start time is 8:00am and am asked to take the youngest to a park for the morning. If the youngest isn’t dressed/emotionally prepared to leave the house until 9:00am or 9:15am, that is when we leave the house and that is when my (for example) two hour childcare block begins. If we arrive home at 11:00am, and her mother hasn’t completed her morning tasks that require a child-free house, this means that I remain on-duty until these tasks are complete (ie. household cleaning, grocery shopping, work tasks, etc.). Once my morning shift is complete (whenever that ends up being) I typically make myself unavailable by leaving the house to study/read at a coffee shop. I always make sure to ask what time they would like me back, and I arrive when I am requested (because my half day on weekends is also almost always a split shift).
Sometimes this day might look something like this: -8:00am “start” that doesn’t seem to really begun until an hour later (so 9:00am to 11:00am) -2:00pm-3:00pm -5:00pm to 7:00pm
If the kids last minute have a play date, my 2:00pm-3:00pm might get cancelled, but this also means that it might extend the 5:00pm-7:00pm block.
This past Sunday I arrived home at 5:00pm, only to find out that at 5:15pm that the youngest was spontaneously joining a friend on an outing.
The morning shift is also often blocked off so that the mother can assist the eldest with homework, but if he sleeps in and they don’t start until later, this also affects my start and end time.
Obviously, this sucks.
I brought this up in a way that I feel was respectful and fair, and was more or less told that “this is how we’ve always done this, so I don’t see us changing. Our weekends aren’t scheduled ahead of time, and this is part of the flexibility of having an au pair. If we wanted someone to watch the kids for a block of time, we would hire a babysitter.”
I was honestly shocked at this response, because I personally do NOT see this as how an au pair should function. I reiterated that it is unreasonable and shitty to have someone on-call for a twelve-hour stretch for what should theoretically be a maximum of 6 hours of work. Her response was that they are only asking for one day of flexibility per week, and so I should plan to be home with the expectation that I won’t be working the entire day.
I also asked if there was any way to receive (at very least) a more specific timeline than “morning” or “afternoon”. Her response was that they can try to plan something ahead of time, but will have to reconfirm the morning of. She said that if I make plans and then my work hours change, it would be really shitty/look really shitty for me to cancel. This was presented as a compromise, but I feel like it’s no different than the current situation.
I am now less frustrated by the scheduling issue than I am by the blatant disregard for my personal time and life outside of my au pairing duties this shows.
TLDR: My contract does not specify exact work hours and host family will not provide a set schedule, expecting me to be available for the entire day until they decide when they need me on the day of. How would you proceed?

I've been running ads on FB for 5 years for my ecommerce supplements/hygiene business. Had massive success years ago during the covid times.
Our products are pretty basic, undifferentiated, easy-ish to source. If a marketer asks me what makes us different, I hate the question cuz I can't say much aside from our co-founder's genuine story about her problems and why the products work for HER. We run a good, wholesome business helping people. But it's pretty thin "differentiation" from other competitors I admit.
What I've observed over years is a slow decline in conversion rate off of FB ads. I've come to realize that it isn't about launching another ad variation for me. I've thrown shit at the wall for years trying to get some steam going again on FB. Had consultants rip my shit apart. Gone to ad meetups. Tried whatever method that ad-method-peddler has. Done all that shit. So PLEASE do not comment about, "have you tried X yet?" I probably have.
Last inkling of success I had was November of 2022 where I reached spending thousands/day for a 5% conversion rate which is pretty badass. Created a big boom for our biz. It didn't last too long though.
Now? Our conversion rates have plummeted and it's our #1 killer issue. Ad viewability metrics, CPCs, outbound CTRs, CPMs....all compareable to the past. The massive change is that I have had 5% conversion rates in the past on ads. NOW I'm looking at .5-1.5% for similar, but new ads.
Either FB is feeding me total garbage traffic, or our niche has been crushed by the low barrier to entry and "everyone does this" now. AKA the consumer has lots of options and that depresses the conversion rate significantly.
Thoughts? What would you do in a spot like this?

Ok so I wanna preface this by saying I am indeed a peace of shit so please spare me the hate.
Anyways I'm moving to a new city soon to start my job and decided to hop on a dating app to meet someone. I ended up matching with this one lady we spoke for like a week I told her l'm nervous to move and was hoping to meet someone (I even told her the company I'll be working for) etc etc. But in reality I was just trying to sleep with her (I know I know I'm terrible). About a week of talking with her I realized that what I'm doing is wrong but it was too late now so instead of actually telling her I decided to instead....ghost her. Mind you we've been pretty close up until now, but I simply wasn't man enough to break the news to her. Then two days ago she hits me up (because i'm moving this week) and basically tells me good luck. I apologized for ghosting her, she asked me why I did that then tell her I was only trying to sleep with her and she got pissed at me for lying and wtv (again, not because I only wanted to sleep with her but because I lied). I told her i'm sorry but this is the truth and ig I don't really know what else to say. She said I used her and that I'm going to be using the new girl I'm talking to on the app (but this new girl I actually like and have a connection with her, it's not a purely lustful relationship). I told her i'm sorry i don't know what to say. Then she said she'll contact HR.....can HR do something about this? Like can I get fired for this? Our "situationship" (if you even wanna call it that) does not affect the work or company i'm working for in any way shape or form. It's a completely private "relationship", obviously no one even knew abt it besides me and her and plus we never even met. Sooooo can I get fired for this? (Also this is my first time working at a big company so I don't know how HR really works)

Never thought I would be making a post on here, but I only get 3 free therapist visits a year so here I am.
TLDR : My parents have fully replaced me with some guy (M28) they met at work/ church. I'm slightly hurt but ultimately it's their life and they can do what the please. I am more bewildered, and concerned about my parents being taken advantage of.
First some relevant background info:
My parents are VERY religious boomers. by this I mean more religious than you would believe until you actually spoke to them. growing up this created a lot of friction between us. As I reached my teens I became disillusioned with organized Christianity mostly due to the fact that a lot of modern day interpretations miss the point of what is written in the Bible. the hypocrisy I witnessed was rampant among church members including my parents. I strongly disliked their thinly veiled revulsion for any people who they considered "sinners", a title which was doled out on a whim. even while I was in the church it would be weaponized against other church goers and even myself once. a pastor from another church told a girl I was hanging out with that I would lead her to hell, despite the fact that I also went to church. she promptly cut off all contact despite admitting that she didn't want to, but was being threatened with being kicked out of her church groups of she did not.
back to my parents: we were at odds throughout my teen years as I began to avoid church and anything about it. I did not stop believing but I did not want to be associated with their type of toxic Christianity. this was not something they could understand. when I say they are fully indoctrinated it means they are irredeemable in many of their views. they were willing to ignore any and all boundaries I set about religion even to this day. despite me telling them that what they were doing would tear our family apart. in the end they chose religion over their children. my sister is essentially no contact with them.
as a very young child, our family moved around a lot. I was a continual outsider. I had no friends, at all. my parents would say it was no big deal cause I was just a kid and kids don't care about that stuff really, kids don't know the difference, etc. but I knew the difference and I desperately wanted friendship and community. the only constants were 2 hyper controlling parents who wanted a quiet and obedient follower.
eventually we moved to a place where I was able to form solid friendships for the first time in my life. it was , to this day, the happiest time period of my life. this lasted until my final year of high school when my parents decided to move. despite me having many friends whose parents offered me a place to stay for the final year, my parents forced me to move. this caused me to spiral into a deep depression for around 3 years. I developed enduring social anxiety which I deal with to this day. I have made peace with the fact that I will never have a lot of friends, but thinking about what I missed out on is painful. years later I found out they forced me to move because they prayed and God told them it would be better for all of us if I moved with them. we needed to stay together as a family. then 2 years later they moved back to the place they took me from. all I can do is laugh at this because it is so dark and obviously bullshit. when it was my life getting fucked up "God" said ok we needed to stay together as a family. when I needed support he said naw just ditch him and move away.
my life was destroyed by religion. I have since learned that of course, we are ultimately in charge of our own happiness, but at the time I had no knowledge of trauma or therapy. simply 2 parents who reduced every concern I ever had in my life to "just pray about it". in fact throughout my entire life they diminished all of my concerns, big and small. in addition, they would often judge me for everything I did, even if they were innocent to a non religious person. so I would only tell them about things when I absolutely had no other choice. and they would treat them as wholly unimportant. they also believed that men should not be upset or emotional and should figure things out for themselves. so they would help my sister out whenever she needed it, including buying her a new car, while I was riding my bike an hour each way to go to engineering school. there were many points in my life where I was at rock bottom, and despite them having more than enough means to help me, they did not.
compounding this is the fact that all the while they diminished my own concerns, they would bend over backwards to help people not in our family. they always wanted to appear nice and helpful, but this never extended to me. in fact they would often do things to inconvenience me in order to help some random person they just met.
All of these circumstances created a very weird relationship dynamic between us all. I became avoidant, negative and pessimistic for years before I discovered therapy and began to work through my mental health issues. I struggled in many relationships I had, and always felt like I was a lesser person than everyone else. this persisted until around 3 years ago when I began to correct the errors in my thinking patterns. despite therapy, I still struggle to have a relationship with my parents. all they talk about is religion. I have given up trying to enforce the boundary there. there is no point. they don't know anything else. they cannot be different and have no desire to change, in fact they see no error in their actions throughout the years. despite me obviously having issues. they essentially chalk it up to me just being a bad egg. I have since been able to forgive them, but the trauma I experienced throughout my life has left me with tendencies they hate. I withdraw when I am depressed, I am prone to anxiety from time to time, I have ADHD, I distance myself from them because all they do is cross my boundaries to preach at me, etc etc.
Back to the present:
Before my dad retired he hired this guy, let's call him Raj, at his work. just a basic bank employee. he is a nice enough guy I think. a little awkward but nice enough. I believe he has an engineering degree from another country but it got rejected by our country, so he had to just take whatever job he could get. he is new to the country and a bit of a fish out of water, this is the reason I think most people looked past his non ordinary behavior.... I literally cannot imagine myself ever hanging out or going on vacations with my boss, who is 20+ years older than me.
he struggled to understand the job and my dad had to spend a lot of time with him to get him up to speed. he began to go to my dad for life advice beyond work, as he struggled with making friends or getting a girlfriend. I think eventually my parents invited him to church and he went, despite being originally Hindu. eventually he went with them regularly and integrated himself with them to a wild extent that I did not realize until this past weekend when they came to "visit". they brought this motherfucker with them without saying shit beforehand. paid for his hotel and all his food. bought him clothes and took him on errands. all while saying they didn't really have time to assist me; I cannot drive anymore as I began having seizures 3 years ago.
when we did finally hang out, my own parents mistakenly called me his name many times. they acted like a family and treated me like I was just some dude lol.
we went out to dinner with some friends of theirs who were also in town. during dinner they called Raj my parents adopted son. needless to say I was very weirded out. but did not say anything. if I did they would just say I was being negative and I look like the asshole.
I know Raj does not make a lot of money but somehow he was able to buy a small house a year after starting work. I have not seen proof personally but my sister has said she is sure that my pprovided the down payment. this is where I began to be concerned they are being taken advantage of. this is very out of character for my parents.
I have considered also the weirdest possiblity, that they may have some kind of weird ass sugar baby relationship but I simply cannot see that being the case. they are hypocrites about some aspects of Christianity, such as not judging people, but they are 1000% devout when it comes to what they would deem as sin.
I get the impression that they have empty nest syndrome and compounded with their propensity to bend over backwards for non family members, they have essentially adopted this guy. he is at their house several times a week. as far as I know my mom prepares most of his meals.
it appears to me that they found a replacement for me with none of the mental health issues and resentment ( that they caused) and who was willing to play the part of a church goer. I fear now, based on watching them shop together that he is taking advantage of them. If they are just choosing to help him out money wise that is MASSIVELY out of character for them to do so to this extent. this is the main reason I think they are being taken advantage of. they are doing things for this guy they would NEVER do for anyone.
I am not sure how to approach this situation or what to even think about it. I lack the bandwidth to really mull it over or be upset about it. one thing I am certain of is that me saying anything about this will do nothing except make them mad and bring them closer together .they think I am simply a negative person and don't really listen to my thoughts on things, whether I am right or not.they have always treated me like I'm a moron
Is this as weird to you as it is to me? What would you do in this scenario?

I had a wonderful childhood. I couldn't have asked for a better one. My parents, brother, family, ... so much love in my life.
As I got older, I started to become exposed to the harsh realities of life. The people closest to me and the ones I loved the most started to get sick and pass away. I lost my dog. Life wasnt the same. And later, was diagnosed with Crohns which had a massive impact on my life and self confidence. I felt like a lab rat.. so many tests, doctor visits, medicine, diets, needles, ... eventually extensive surgery.
Luckily, after years of torture, I made it out ok. I started to build back my confidence, and was optimistic about the future. Before I knew it, I met the love of my life. I felt so extremely lucky to have you in my life. It felt like a dream. I felt that after all that pain and loss, I had finally had something good happen to me.
As time we on, we became best friends. You confessed your love to me, said I was different than all the rest, and you saw a future with me. You expressed how special I was to you. I felt the same way.
We met eachothers families, who became so close with eachother. I truly loved your family, they felt like home. My family loved you so much... my parents loved you like a daughter, and I knew you loved them too. We had everyone's support and love. We were the golden couple. We grew and experiences so much together. Bought our first house, saw the world, new jobs, school, ... Everyone was so proud of us, and we were proud of eachother.
Somewhere along the way, you started seeking outside the relationship for attention. I knew you were very social, so at first, I was happy to see you making friends. I knew you had a difficult childhood and past, and didn't have many good friends, so I was very supportive and encouraged you to do things with your friends.
We were inseparable. Always going things together, planning trips, going on adventures. Everything was easy. We enjoyed eachothers company so much. We made eachother laugh, feel loved, and safe. We were so comfortable and open, goofy with eachother, and always so intimate.
We shared a lot of the same hobbies: plants/garden, camping, trails, video games, movies, travel, outdoors, relaxing at home, ... it didn't seem to matter what we were doing, we were happy together.
I loved making you smile and laugh. I loved seeing you happy doing what you loved, or eating a meal I'd prepare for you.
I always wanted you to have the best. Since you were in school, I provided for you. Food, toys, restaurants, trips, ... whatever you wanted. I wanted to give you the world. It felt so good to make you happy.
You would tease me and hint towards wanting to get engaged. After 3 years, it happened. We were so happy, and you were so excited and happy to share the big news. We started planning our wedding, moved into a bigger house, new jobs, everything felt good.
I never expected to love someone so much. This young woman brought so much love, happiness, and adventure into my life. She completed changed everything. Everything was so easy.. effortless.. felt right.
When we moved into your dream home, things became more stressful. The house needed a lot of work, as well as the property. Regardless, we were willing and eager to tackle projects together and were excited to make things our own.
As time went on, and school/work seemed to become more stressful for you, I was left finishing a lot of our projects and maintaining them by myself. I also stepped up and started trying to take on more of the chores and responsibilities so that you could focus on school/work and still have time to relax. I was happy to help give you some relief.
After a few months, your brother asked to be our roommate for a time. I was hesitant, but you encouraged me that it would be a good thing. He would pay and help around the house. At first, it was nice. However, as time we on, it became more and more stressful.
The stress of doing everything and having a roommate that didn't mesh well with us overwhelmed me. I knew it was temporary, so I endured it.
One day, you came home from your new job and expressed what a good day you had.. that you had the chance to work with a different doctor, and that he was very fun and nice. I was so happy to hear it, since I knew you hadn't been having good days and people had been difficult. I was glad you seemed to have a mentor.
You started to have more good days than bad, working with this person more and more. You started talking to me about them more, sharing things you learned and talked with him about. As time went on, I started to feel a bit jealous. You had been spending more time with this person than me... your shifts were long, and I hadn't been seeing you as much. You started even talking to our parents about this person.
I started to notice you texting him while we were at home together. I'd ask, and you'd happily share whatever it was you guys were talking about. One evening, you were texting this doctor late at night. I approached you about this, and expressed how it was making me feel. I felt that it had started to become too much, and wasn't appropriate. I didn't like the idea of this older married man communicating with my young fiance so much. I expressed that I was happy that you had a friend at work, but felt that it was becoming too personal and inappropriate. You tried to reassure me that you were just friends, and that he was old and married, you would never be attracted to him. I stood firm and expressed that I would like for you to only communicate while at work, or for work related matters. You agreed and assured me it was nothing.
As time went on, I noticed you would sometimes hide your phone, turn it away, flip it upside down, or turn it off as I walked by. At first, I thought it was just me being paranoid. But as time went on, it started to mess with my head... otherwise, everything was good, so I told myself it was nothing. You started to enjoy that type of work and decided to join his practice. I was happy you were able to make up your mind and find something you enjoyed. Time went on. At some point, you needed an invasive procedure done... and you requested that doctor complete it. I didn't love the idea, but you preferred to have someone do it that you trusted. After that, the doctor seemed to be a thing of the past.
As the wedding date approached, the excitement increased. We had everything planned out and we were so excited for our big day. I saw how happy you were throughout the whole process. I couldn't believe our big day was right around the corner.
Our wedding was like a dream. Everything came together so nicely. We had the best night of our lives. I loved seeing you so happy with our friends and family there to celebrate with us. We went on a wonderful honeymoon and I felt so loved and appreciated.
Once we returned home, our roommate left, and stress started to decrease dramatically in the house. I was so relieved. You finished school, graduated, and I threw you a big surprise party to celebrate. I had always put together parties for all your special occasions, and I knew you really appreciated that. After so many nights helping you study, it felt wonderful to see you walk across that stage and finally finish.
You shortly after moved to a different hospital, and seemed to really like your new job and everyone there. Life was so good...
The house and our list of responsibilities and all the maintenance was still a lot, but I felt we were quickly starting to knock things off our list.
One week, you started working a lot... I hardly saw you that week. We'd always text and check in, saying we loved eachother, missed eachother, and looked forward to seeing eachother. When the weekend finally arrived, you had mentioned your best friend invited you to join her for girl time. I realized you hadn't seen her much lately and encouraged it.
That weekend, my grandmother had been struggling. I felt alone in our big house and had wished you were there. We checked in on eachother while you were gone. I was expecting you to return one evening, so I had dinner prepared. I was hurt when you didn't arrive and decided to stay another night with your friend.
When I saw you the next morning, I was feeling pretty down. I was already sad about my grandmother, but also felt like an after thought that week. You were so happy to see me, which was nice. We had a nice evening, spent time together, .. you never stopped telling me you loved me.
The next day after work, I got home, and you seemed so cold and distant. You seemed bothered by something. I checked in, asked if you needed anything, then went about my day. It seemed like you wanted space. I checked in every few hours, and you were busy doing something on your laptop.
I prepared dinner and started watching TV. I encouraged you to take a break, eat, and relax some before bed. You joined me on the couch, but was quiet and explained that you had some work to finish.
As it got late, I went up to bed. You explained you'd be up a little longer while you finished your work. As the hours went by, I thought it was so odd that you weren't in bed yet. I knew you had to get up early... sleep was always such a priority. I got up to check on you and to get some water. You were still on your laptop.. I noticed you were looking at rooms to something. I encouraged you to get some sleep. You joined me, looking exhausted.
We cuddled, said we loved eachother, then fell asleep. The next morning, I finished getting ready for work while you slept. As I was getting ready to leave, I sae your laptop. I decided to check and see what you were looking at... another air bnb for a trip? I was curious. We shared the laptop, so I didn't feel like I was invading her privacy.
I opened the laptop and saw apartments. I was so confused. I checker her email.. apartments. I noticed she had Facebook messenger up with recent messages. I checked... my world turned upside down. Those seconds felt like eternity as my heart sounded and my stomach sank. I read a message to a friend saying she wanted a divorce, never loved me, felt like a stranger in her house, dreaded coming home to me, ... that she loved a doctor.. he's married, but his wife is a lesbian. That was easily the worst moment of my life. I panicked and didn't know what to do... I was in shock. After a few minutes, I decided to address this with you.
I quietly walked up the stairs, sat on the edge of the bed, and calmly woke you up. You were sleepy, asking why I woke up.. you still had about 30m before work. I apologized for waking you.. As I looked at you silently, I started to cry. I quietly said "I know...". "I saw the messages". She looked back at me in shock.. eyes wide in the dark. I asked if she had been having an affair. She said no.. then started to look at me as if I wad a stranger. It was a terrible feeling.
You got up to get ready for work, and said we'd talk later that evening. You left. I was standing in the driveway and felt sick. I wasn't sure if I could make it to work.. but being at the house was making me feel worse, so I left. I didn't eat anything that while day. While at work, I prepared myself for our talk.
When we both got home, you pulled up to the house and started to pack some things while I sat on the couch. When you finally joined me, you were quiet.. asked about my day, I asked about yours.. then more silence. I asked what you needed from me. You explained that you were feeling very anxious, and didn't want me to get upset. You said you were going to stay with a friend for a few days to clear your head and wanted to talk once we were both rested.
You left for almost a week while I stayed in our big empty house, taking care of our pets, and completely confused and dead inside. I hardly ate or slept. I desperately started reading and watching whatever information I could find to help explain what was happening and to prepare myself. I spent most of my time thinking, reflecting on our life. I started tonrealize how stressed I had been... and thought about all the things I should/could have done differently. I knew I treated her so well, but no one is perfect.
Looking back, I started to think about all the red flags. Love is blind. I truly loved, trusted, and cared for this person more than anyone in the world. I thought she felt the same way... I never imagined us seperating.
I started to think of that doctor she used to talk about.. and realized she probably never stopped talking to him. I started to realize that my wife had stopped opening up to me... was no longer emotional or vulnerable... her emotional? affair started to kill the emotional intimacy between us.
I was happy just to have her in my life and enjoyed just being with her... she never expressed or talked about being unhappy... if I had known, I feel certain that we could have fixed whatever was lacking. I would have met whichever needs werent being met.
Were you lonely while I was busy working hard for us? Was she bored? I would have happily planned more outings... whenever I suggested something, you expressed that you were tired or didn't show interest. I knew you enjoyed time alone, so I never felt bad doing my own thing. I figured you would tell me of you needed or felt something...
I was so confused... started to question what was real. When did this all start? Why? How? Terrible thoughts entered my mind... so many late shifts, staying the night at the hospital, leaving early to get the air bnbs ready, ...
I also realized that towards the end, you had suddenly started to listen to different music, got a nose piercing, tattoo, talked about signing up for a sport, working out, ... these were all things I knew you had wanted to do for awhile, but it was all so sudden.
Why didn't you ever communicate... I recall you expressing your concern with my stress, but nothing else. I felt that my stress was reasonable considering everything I was doing.. and knew it was temporary. I didn't ignore it though. I saw a therapist, and started making changes. Was it all too late?
When we finally spoke again, it was so nice to just see you. We sat and you were so friendly and sweet - it reassured me that everything was going to be ok. We made small talk and joked, which immediately lightened the mood. You suggested I spoke first. I expressed my feelings and how important the marriage was.. that I'd so anything to save it. I took responsibility for my side of things and expressed the changes I had made and would continue to make. When you started, you expressed that you would always cherish our time together, but we're set on divorce. That we both deserved to be truly happy. Shortly after, you left.
The days after, you started packing your things while I was at work. I was living in a big empty house, every day getting more and more empty. I was a complete mess living in hell. Her family started to reach out to me and shower me with support, apologies, and disbelief. No one could make sense of this.
After a week or so, I couldn't take it any more, so I moved to stay with my parents while we finished moving out. I attempted to stay cordile through all this. You seemed so unphased and happy... texting me and talking to me like we were still best friends.
You explained that you felt bad for saying you never loved me... that you did, but not in the way a wife should love their husband. That it could be years, but in the future, I could count on you.
As time went on, and the pain increased, I was more distant. You texted more and more. Finally, I suggested that we limit communication unless she was interested in working on our marriage.
As the days went by, you grew colder and irritated.. I started to feel like the bad guy. I know you started to feel the weight of your decisons, and starred to project onto me. Making me the bad guy made you feel better. I attempted to end things on a good note... being helpful throughout the move out process, but you were so cold. It hurt so much... 5 wonderful years tossed aside like it never mattered.
I havent talked to you in weeks... I miss my best friend, my love, your family, our pets, and the wonderful life we built. I'm left trying to pickup the pieces. I feel so lost, confused, broken, ...
The tremendous amount of support I've gotten from both sides has helped a lot. I'm seeing a therapist, reading a lot, eating more, working out, and focusing on my self. The days are getting better, but I still have days where I am a mess.
I havent been sleeping well... always tired. Waking up several times, terrible nightmares and thoughts of you being with another man... I still have believe you would be capable of all this.. of hurting me so much.
I have urges to reach out to you... wanting to fix this, that there must be a misunderstanding... there are so many things I'd like to say. I got complacent and comfortable during our time together. I stopped doing the little things as often as I used to... I never meant to hurt you, make you feel lonely, unloved, unappreciated, ... whatever it is you felt. It's difficult for me to accept that my sweet innocent wife was capable of this... surely there was a reason?? I was just so caught up in my list of things... I was working so hard for our future.
I feel like my wife was manipulated by this man... why does an older doctor (20 years older) have a lesbian wife? He doesn't love her like she seems to think... he is using her. I feel sorry for her... I know there is no future there.
I've done a lot of reading on Attachment Styles, Limerence, love addiction, and other things that come as a result of childhood trauma. I feel like a lot of this has to do with her trauma... but also her selfishness and emotional immaturity. There is nothing I can do. I just pray she figures things out on her own, finds longlasting happiness, and puts an end to this cycle.
I would love it if we were able to reconnect in the future... I still deeply love and care for her. I don't want our story to end... none of this feels right. My gut is screaming that this is all wrong. I just know we both need to work on ourselves for the time being.
One day I had it all, the next, it crashed down before my eyes. Meeting you was the best thing to happen to me... you leaving was the worst. You rushed out of my life so quickly... I wish things were different.

idk maybe i’ll get into how we met later on if y’all are interested in the story.
but background information; we met at an event/ party on the 31st of september 2023 and i tapped his shoulder because i was drunk and he looked hella cute. So after that we started talking and we later found out we were in the same school and yeah. He’s 18M and i’m 16F
so he cold at first and i hadn’t really liked him like that. I was just talking to him to he polite because you can’t just ask for someone’s number and ditch them like that. So he was cold but i could handle it because everyone deserves kindness. we talked and it was okay, until the first visit. The first visit was on a thursday and i hadn’t gone to school. And on the previous day he had told me he was not going so we decided to link up. So i went to his house and i thought we were going to chill since that’s what he said. ooo boy i got that wrong. after we had finally linked up, he was cold. Really cold but as i said, i could handle it. I was quiet while we walked to his house because we had a meeting place since i didn’t really know his house. okay great, i was quiet and he asked me what was on my mind and i responded with “i’m wondering is i made a mistake coming here” he said “you can turn if you want” (example of how he was😂)
great so we get to his house and it’s a cozy little house. He lived with his mom alone but she was at work since this was like at 9-10 am. so we got there and we sat in his living room and u was just cuddling my purse in my lap.😂he sat on another seat and out of thin air this man pulls out a vape and he’s just scanning me head to toe. so he questions me a bit and i swear it was like i was in an interview but okay. So he says can you give me a hug and i stand up yknow being polite, and i hug him. And then boom kissing. so he says let’s go to his bedroom and that day i was on my periods. again my dunbass thinks nothing of it and we go. i walk in and i’m mesmerized cs this guy is CLEAN. so aight we carry on and his hand goes inside my pants. and i was wearing tights under my pants yknow. So long story short i tell him i’m on my period and he says it’s okay.
And after that i was soul tied🙃✨. Great so after the second time we had met and done it, i think the second time was the day i fell for this dude. Because it was 2 days after our first meetup and he was much more lighter. He was happier before we had even done it. So yeah after that we he progressively got warmer but he was still cold don’t get me wrong. He hated phone calls but would make an exception if i begged yknow. cool, until he just changed. We started arguing a lot and before christmas 2023 (if y’all want i can get into detail in another story )we broke up… well went on a break but later the day before Christmas, his ex posted him. We weren’t really known, he didn’t want to be seen with me but i was head over heels in love so i said okay because i didn’t want to jeopardize what we had.
we went on a few on and offs until i just couldn’t do it because he had been physically cheating on me right in front of my eyes. so we just stopped talking and it really broke me. Till present day. This happened in February so all these months i’ve been thinking about him and how he was nice before. I still want him, all of him with his imperfections and coldness and smalll kindness. and the weird way of him expressing his feelings. i have accept him and love him the way he is but ig he isn’t looking for that. Should i go back ? even though i’m exhausted, i have hope he’ll become the guy i’ve known. Cold but has a soft little spot for me.
if yalll like this, i can do more details about the 9 times we’ve met up and done shit. (maybe he’s just tired of me hey)

I 16F in October was best friends with a girl from my school, in May of 2023 I helped my childhood friend and her get together, flash forward to October of the same year her friend says she saw him with another girl in the hallway and she got so mad at him. It was later on said that it wasn’t even him but a different couple. She was seen as a lil crazy for yelling at him when he was getting proof saying that he was in the classroom the whole block, my other friend asked me what was going on between them because he asked her where he was for proof, I said to her “Shits been going down.” My best friend said I was going to put her and her boyfriend at risk and now everyone was going to be going after him (no one was). I was apologizing the whole time she was cursing me out, she even said she was going to off me. After that fight i was distant and didn’t talk to her as much. The day before that fight we saw the TS movie together, which my dad paid for, I let her borrow some of my clothes for it and need them back. She said that she would tomorrow I responded dryly this whole conversation we had. She noticed and asked me what was wrong. I told her how I felt about what she said during our argument which I never said anything mean she called me a snake, bitch, and wanted to kill me. She started to play the victim saying how it’s her first relationship and how she doesn’t know how to act. Long story short I forgave her but didn’t stay close to her and then in January, when her and him were still together they both blocked me on everything and never talked to me again. All of my friend who also used to be their friends said I should have been meaner and was a push over. So AITA?

My boyfriend and I both work from home. Been together 11 years. Our biggest stressor is he gets so angry at work that it pours out into me and just makes being in the apt with him miserable. I'm generally an upbeat positive person who won't let a bad day get me down.
He's been swearing at his computer for the last four hours. Then will go silent and barely talk to me which I understand so I leave him alone. He flipped out today because the plant he watered overflowed and was swearing up a storm. Then when that was fixed he went on about how much he "hates his fucking job and the ppl he works with are idiots" this is the time he usually starts interrogating me asking me if l'm making money at my job (it's commission based but a lot more laid back than his job). He was just smiling at something his sister sent him so l decided to try to be funny & make him laugh and with a straight face he goes "im having a bad day at work" and walked away. So then I feel like I can't even be happy in my own home when he's in a bad mood. And if I’m too quiet he has an attitude and questions why I’m quiet & anxious. But if I say it’s because of his moods he says “everyone has bad days”
How do I not let his bad moods affect me? How do I get him to not take his bad moods out on me? I'm probably over reacting but I hate that I feel like I have to tip toe around him every single day it's so draining. Share

I vaguely remember it being an indie game around maybe the early to mid 2010’s, the UI was very social media based, ala Facebook, and you’d play a resident on a spaceship who was eventually tasked with scoring an expensive ticket to get off the ship.
I want to say you could work to get it? But a heavy emphasis was based on dating a richer resident who would get one for you. IIRC the company that made it had a more successful game out at the time and I happened to find it when I wanted to seek more games by them.
Some details may be incorrect, but hopefully I remembered enough. :)

For context, my (27F) cousin (29F), who I am very close to, had spent the last 3 months or so spending time with someone and I've been very excited for her. It's her first WLW relationship (we are both lesbians) and at first it seemed like it was going real well for the two of them. Her and this woman are both still living at home, and my cousin is still closeted. My cousin does not have a safe space at home but she is unable to move out due to the area she lives in being very expensive. I've been trying to get her to move to my area for two years since it would be easier on her but it has not happened. She meets this woman, things go well and she decides she wants to have a conversation about whether or not their exclusive, as she wants to be. The conversation happens and the partner tells her she isn't ready and needs to have her shit together. This talk somehow ends with my cousin also deciding she's not ready for a relationship. I warned her to not get into a situationship with this girl, it's going to hurt, and she's going to regret it. She brushes off my concerns with 'I won't I promise' They had sex for the first time the recent weekend and I told her I didn't wanna hear any details but I was excited for her as she lost her virginity that night. I then told her I was worried that this relationship wasn't healthy for her, but never expressed not liking this girl. I believe I was respectful for the entire conversation, maintaining that this was my perspective and that it seems as though she's allowing herself to be blinded by being wanted rather than maintaining her emotional boundaries and looking out for herself. She told me that I was being hateful and snarky with her and that she was standing up for herself and that I can't see how I'm acting. I can attach messages if I need to, but I really feel as though I was simply voicing concern and did not intend to attack anyone. My partner read the messages (and has a track record of telling me when I'm wrong) and says that I came off as very respectful and worried.

OK let me preface this by saying the cops were absolutely doing too much and it was wayyyy overkill but I gotta say I’ve never felt so safe at a festival and I go to A LOT. I trusted that no one could sneak weapons in so I didn’t have to be checking for the exits and plotting my escape plan should anything happen like I usually do. AND NO PHONE THIEVES?! Every other festival I’ve been to has a major phone theft problem and I’ve had it happen to me but here I literally just left all my shit sitting on the beach while I frolicked in the water and didn’t have to worry.

Hi all, I’m 27F. I lived in Delhi and had shifted from Kalkaji to Malviya Nagar in December. Found the flatmate via flat and flatmate group on facebook. It’s a 2bhk and total rent is 34k. Before shifting, like any sane person, I visited the flat and sat down and got to know the other tenant is subletting and the owner doesn’t give one fuck about who shifts there, just needs rent. I sat down and spoke to her for 1.5 hours just to see who I’m going to be living with for the next 5-6 months as I didn’t plan on staying for long, will be shifting cities.
She lost her mother in December end(she is youngest of 4 children and is 31 years old). I had a lot of empathy for her as it’s a huge tragedy for any human to lose their mother. I Used to take all responsibility in the house, used to do all the work, pay all the bills so she could grieve in peace and not worry about these trivial things, used to keep checking on her regularly.
Her coping mechanism on the other hand was to bring dates to the flat - unannounced. Not judging, but a little heads up would be good as I’m a woman living in an independent flat, mostly wearing clothes which I wouldn’t wear in front of strange men. And she would never interact with me, even for coordinating the basis like maid, bills, security and utilities. Even if I would try to initiate the conversation she’d dodge and say let’s talk tomorrow.
Cut to April, I was in my hometown for whole months, on 25 April she texts the landlord is increasing rent by 20%. I felt something fishy because rent is usually increased by 10% with at least one month of notice. I told her 20k is too much for a room which is size of storeroom which no furniture, not even an AC. I only shifted here because it’s closer to my office and I didn’t plan on staying for long either. But I can’t spend 20k out of my 50k salary on the room. So I’ll probably shift.
When I reached at the flat a week later, I find out she’s kept some stuff in my room, dirty clothes on my laundry back including dirty underwear. Treated my room like a storeroom/dumpyard. When I expressed my disgust by merely asking ‘what is this’, she started getting aggressive and started verbally abusing me. Calling me ‘weird asshole’ because I came unannounced. She was physically violent and tried to attack me. Her reaction was that of a 5 year old, totally unhinged. Next day I packed my stuff and decided to leave the flat as it was already 30th. I told her to keep the security money and paid all the left Splitwise balance. Yet she said I have to pay rent for May and she will return my security at May end. I asked what’s the point when you are already keeping the security money. She had no answer kept asking for rent. Started harassing me verbally again. She was literally in my face trying to intimidate me.
Now I had rented a washing machine, we split the monthly rent for it. But it’s kept in her balcony and the access is through her room. It was supposed to be picked on the same day,but after abusing me she went to her room and didn’t let the machine get picked. I left for my hometown, my cab was waiting. The neighbours in building also mentioned she’s done this before with other tenants, withheld their AC. Owner is also aware of her behaviour but refuses to meddle.
Now she Kept texting me she will let it get picked at end of May as she is vacating the flat. I’ve scheduled the pick up for 25, but she wouldn’t let it happen. I’m anticipating she won’t return it and I’m thinking of filing a police complaint. Help me out guys, if I don’t return it I will have to pay 21k to Rentomojo.
What can I do in this situation? I still have keys to the flat FYI.
TLDR- 31f unhinged flatmate, got verbally abusive, harassed me for money, when I decided to shift. I have shifted from there but she won’t let me return the rental washing machine kept in her balcony, machine is registered in my name. She’s vacating flat at month end, owner doesn’t care.

What/how little do we think Ariana eats a day to maintain her current state? I’m just fascinated by how someone, especially with her mental health issues & busy schedule manages so much with so little nourishment, I would feel like I didn’t have a minute to breathe if I was so deep in my ed but had so many obligations to show up for (which alone can be exhausting). I’m aware there’s all kinds of drugs/help she could be getting to stay up & running as she is, however, taking a possibly more realistic approach, I wonder if maybe she truly does just drink a shit ton of black coffee which can do the trick to an extent (ik my heart would be racing out of my chest, if I ingested the amount she does lol I feel like it has a higher affect on those w anxiety?) she probably is just incredibly strategic abt what/when she eats so she can keep pushing through her days, that on top of the fact she probably gets a lot of steps in for someone so malnourished (especially on set for wicked where she had to dance & run all around set) I’m interested to hear some other thoughts on this & what y’all think a day of eating (or lack thereof🙈) looks like for her! P.S. she is no longer vegan to my knowledge there have been numerous reports she confirmed it in a soundcheck back in 2018 although I’m not rlly convinced she was ever truly 100% vegan as she actively bought/wore leather bags & a horrific fur coat, as well all throughout this time period - lol performative much😭 as an ex-vegan I simply point this out to say, you never know especially w someone like her, she’s probably at least primarily still plant based / a pescatarian…coming from experience, however, she probably eats whatever she can that is most high protein/low cal in her state to stay this way w out dying essentially, unless ofc she has orthorexia, which could make it even more difficult for her to indulge in anything outside a v rigid set of safe foods….I say all this not to alienate her in any way, or those w ed’s in general, but as someone who has dealt w an ed similar to her’s & is looking to study nutrition/health, I am simply curious to hear some other viewpoints:) thankfully I am in the final stages of recovery, but I want to be clear it hurts my heart to see anyone dealing w such a hateful relationship w themselves, it truly is a disconnection w the self/soul:( I will also be asking ariheads in the near future & reporting back on their predictable delusion lol. She may be a shit person, however, this post is not intended to shame her for her ed in any way, simply to shed light on a topic I find fascinating in the aftermath of my ed.

Welcome back to my running series of WWF PPV Reviews from a ‘blind’ perspective (I have no idea what’s going to happen; the results, the feuds or how good any of the matches will be). I have always heard stories of the attitude era and golden age but never watched it myself so I set myself to watching every single PPV event chronologically. I am also watching Wrestling Bios ‘reliving the war’ series to keep me updated inbetween the events with the feuds, and to get excited about upcoming matches.
Before I review the matches, based on the past few episodes of raw and last PPVs I’ll let you know, going into the event, which match I’m most excited for and which feud I’m most excited to see.
The match and feud I’m most excited to see is Shawn vs undertaker. I mean what needs to be said their feud is absolutely legendary, and with my favourite match of all time coming in the future between these two I cant wait to see how they perform together in these early years.
WWF In Your House - Ground Zero 1997 Match Ratings
Goldust vs Brian Pillman 2/5
Scott putski vs Brian Christopher 1/5
Savio vega vs Faarooq vs Crush 0.25/5
El torito vs Max Mini 1.5/5
Tag Fatal 4 way elimination match 1.75/5
The patriot vs Bret Hart 3.25/5
Shawn Michaels vs Undertaker 4.75/5
I cannot believe they pulled the “she’s my love child” story it’s so funny to look back on these storylines. Goldust and Pillman are set to fight and there’s a huge grudge for Goldust here so I’m hoping to see a physical bout.
Which it wasn’t… while it was a good bout with no botched or anything, and it was better than their Summerslam match. I saw pillman was limited due to an ankle problem he had, which is kinda weird with the amount of running around he did, but they still had a decent match. Honestly though this draw of this match was where the story was going and it definitely went 😂 Pillman managed to win the match by whacking Goldust with a brick concealed in marlenas bag, and literally drags marlena to his car where he drove off with her. Classic wwf is so hilarious.
The next match was the first time I’m seeing putski and Christopher wrestle and it was actually going well until that ending. I thought they pulled off some very clean looking spots but the crowd was completely dead for almost all of this match, especially after the match, just no one seemed to care. I didn’t really care for this Brian Christopher he was laughing like a clown or something, not even a figure of speech it was literally like a clown. He might’ve been trying to impersonate Lawler but it was just weird. I’m not sure if putski was actually injured or not it was pretty hard to tell but this match seemed like it was 3 or 4 minutes long of pretty dull action.
Going into the next match and honestly I’m pretty bored of these pointless gang wars but let’s see if it can deliver. Maybe rock will get involved and liven it up but all three competitors in this triple threat have yet to put on a good show during my journey through the new gen/attitude era. Also I feel like this is the first triple threat match I’ve seen since KOTR 1996 so there’s some level of excitement for me as it can make for a really entertaining match when done right.
I was surprised to see crush get a pop as I hadn’t heard one before when he made his entrance, but a big biker dude coming in on a massive Harley will get an American crowd going I suppose 😂. But oh man once the match got going there was actually boos going throughout the stadium for the last 1/3 of it. They were trying some weird thing where they played on the fact that they both used to be part of the NOD in which they’d team with farooq on sadio vega but oh my lord it didn’t work at all, it just came off like they had no idea what they were doing. There were no highlights at all, and the last 5 minutes was crush throwing vega out the ring to use moves solo on farooq to which he’d come back in the ring, break the pin and repeat the process. Then he randomly wants to team with crush after all that?? It made no sense at all and was just a bad match, the crowd wasn’t into it and booed during quite a bit of the match, big miss.
I’m just gunna call it a ‘mini-match’ and I’m sure you’ll know what I’m talking about but it ended up being entertaining for what it was in all fairness, much better than the match I’d just seen anyway. It was more of a funny performance than a match; they both end up biting everyone’s asses? Including the referee, and mini goes and steals lawyers crown too. El torito is bloody nuts, his character is basically to act like a bull so he chases refs and officials around trying to headbutt them, fu**ing nuts 😂. I do think it went on a little too long though, if they’re going to book this kind of match then it should be short and sweet filler rather than dragging it on. There was however a pretty good looking springboard move close to the end so that was cool. There were some impressive moves and the crowd was getting involved but It’s just some filler while the show gets going in the end.
Very good idea having dude love and Austin come out inbetween the matches to relinquish the titles as this crowd REALLY needed some livening up after the past hour of the show. And when Steve starts his promo the crowd eats up every second of it and it’s no surprise because he kills it as usual, what a breath of fresh air SCSA is in the WWF during this era. He’s throwing insults to Vince, to the sergeant to JR and it’s f***ing brilliant. It’s cool seeing dude love backing him up as well I think they actually make a really cool looking tag team. And then out of god damn nowhere he delivers a stunner to JR and the crowd absolutely loses it. I would say at this point he is truly the face of the WWF and it really does suck that he suffered that neck injury and couldn’t wrestle properly for a while, having to change his entire wrestling style because of it, but it was never to his detriment, we’re truly in the stone cold era now.
Before the fatal four way, while the LOD get interviewed I couldn’t help but notice how young Michael Cole looks, I mean obviously it’s over 25 years ago but still cool seeing how long he’s been involved.
I really don’t understand these fatal four way tag matches, they always come off weirdly as you can have two people from the same team in the ring that have to wrestle… but it makes no sense because why not just tag someone else in? I don’t know it’s a weird dynamic and I’m not surprised they dropped this type of match in the future.
It’s a shame LOD was the first to be eliminated because they randomly started beating the godwinns with a metal bucket? It makes 0 sense for them to blindly DQ themselves from getting the tag titles since they were crowd favourites, but okay you do you Vince. I wanted them to win too. I know a few people don’t care for LOD but they’re top 2 tag teams in the wwf right now beside Owen and bulldog. The godwinns get eliminated next (thank god), and they just feel like the most filler tag team I’ve ever seen they’re SOOO bland and basic, they don’t even play up to their hillbilly characters anymore which is a new level of bad I won’t lie. I was really REALLY surprised that headbangers took away the belts though, with the massive push of the hart foundation I thought it was a no brainer. It was awesome seeing Austin come in and disrupt the match, he absolutely brings the whole arena completely alive whenever he does anything. Overall though the match was bad and it went on far too long even with four teams. I think the ending was pretty fun but that was only about 2 minutes of the match that was entertaining the rest just felt veryyyy slow.
Man this event has really gotta pull out some f***ing 5/5 main events for it to be worth watching because we’re 1 hour 45 minutes in without a match over 2/5 at most.
When I hear Kurt angles theme playing I was so happy, excited, confused, and then disappointed when I realised it was 3 or 4 years too early. I had no idea they kept this theme and used it for Kurt angle as well as patriot.
I have a small inkling that Bret hart didn’t perform as well as he could’ve in this match because he was annoyed about Shawn getting the top spot after everything that’s gone down and him working more regularly recently than Shawn. Patriot wasn’t a bad wrestler but his character was extremely bland, what would happen after this feud? He’d just be a guy that’s proud to be from America that looks like a Mexican wrestler… in the time of big characters making the main events he unfortunately doesn’t really fit in that well. His in ring ability was good though, no botches or anything but I just couldn’t really feel myself getting into this match. I didn’t really know if they’d book patriot in to take the wwf title as I was pretty sure they wouldn’t want hart to lose his title being such a huge name in the business right now. It was pretty fun when Vader and bulldog came out for some extra drama with them interfering with each of the wrestlers but it’s not a good sign when a match needs drama like that to elevate it. It’s better than what we’ve seen tonight but not particularly worth watching. If you love Bret hart give it a watch as he was his usual fantastic in ring performer but it’s not one of his best for sure. The crowd was really into it, making the hard camera shake chanting “USA USA”, so that was cool, but I’m not entirely sure if it’s because of the crowd or because it was such a small venue. Also worth noting Bret hart is a perfect heel character, he’s a massive star with a character that works perfectly as a heel because he sprinkles some IRL elements into everything he does. The move of breaking the American flag pole and the strangling patriot with the flag is just brilliant, makes it that extra bit more believable and I love it, Americans however must’ve hated it!
Shawn Michaels entrance was so hilarious, he gets hit by a… idk what that even was, a brown cabbage? He makes BJ notions to the crowd, his pyro doesn’t go off properly in the ring like it usually does, and he still pulled it off because he’s HBK, fantastic. This FEELS like main event material though and I’m really excited for it. Sometimes main events don’t really build up properly and just haven’t got that hype behind it but this match should be great. The first of many times we’d see these legends in the ring together.
Starting off the match right too with undertaker taking out the referee and allowing undertaker to take it to the outside and absolutely lay into Michael’s without a count out. I absolutely loved Shawn’s selling during this match too, it’s so over the top that it’s brilliant, with one of his famous vertical presses while he gets kicked in the belly whilst in the corner, love it. Him begging to the ref to dq undertaker, trying to escape through the door of the set and banging on the door, it all works really well and he plays up undertakers character perfectly. I hate when wrestlers forget they’re supposed to play up this undertaker being very scary it really takes away immersion but Shawn does it perfectly. The boos for undertaker seem to be from the women only and the cheers for Shawn seem to be from the women only, of course 😂. I also love seeing the origins of d generation x, one of my all time favourite tag teams as I’m sure is the same with everyone else. HHH makes his way down to the ring with a referee to replace the numerous ones that have been taken out during this match, and they are just the perfect team together I love it.
The actual match I thought was really really fun. It was absolute chaos and maybe not a wrestling masterclass but you can’t deny it was fun. From start to finish we go through 3 referees, we get strangling with power chords, we get triple H and HBK telling the crowd to suck it, and an amazing back and forth showcase from Michael’s and undertaker. I think this match did an absolutely fantastic job and reinstating the undertaker as the most intimidating wrestler in the wwf. The poor referees during this match though, they got absolutely abused. The only thing I didn’t like about this match was the ending. Another random referee comes to the ring to end the match as a DQ, which is a really stupid ending because illegal stuff had already happened when the other referees came to the ring so why wouldn’t they have ended it then? The action continues after the match with undertaker almost soloing Michael’s and HHH. More officials come to the ring as Michael’s beats the hell out of them. And then other wrestlers are forced to come to the ring to try and break the two up which was awesome to see. This really sets up further matches between the two, and I think that’s was the whole idea of the match which worked well, it’s just that I hate these random DQ endings to main events. We see the undertaker flying over the top rope for… I think the first time? Correct me if I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure that’s the first time I’ve seen it in this era which was of course AWESOME!! Overall a really fun match that sets up for further main events but it’s held back by its weird and stupid decision. It’s still well worth a watch if you enjoy this feud however.
Overall, whilst the main event hit all the right places for me I just don’t think the WWF was ready for a 3 hour event yet. They simply didn’t have the roster for it to be enjoyable and so many of these matches went way longer than they had any business doing. I think Bret hart is always gunna deliver so he was fun to watch but it just want one of his best but the main event hit in every single way apart from the finish which I understand is setting up for further matches but ughhhh it was done weirdly and poorly. If you’re gunna watch this event, skip everything but the main event it’s just not worth sitting through everything else.
Overall rating 2.75/5

hello fellow soaders, I haven't seen too much discussion on here about this book. I unfortunately missed the signing in nyc because I was out of state on vacation so bummed about that. Just picked the book up on Sunday when I returned and finished it a few minutes ago so EXTREMELY fresh on my mind.
First, i'd love to hear everyone's thoughts who read it. I'm of course going to be biased because System was such a big part of growing up for me so it is ingrained in my life story. I read cool gardens when it was first released, bought serart the day it released. I own every SOB album, johns album, I even remember the shavo rza project so I'm a SUPER FAN. seen them 5 or 6 times live dating back to the toxicity era. for that reason there's going to be deep bias. I recognize that and would love to see other opinions who perhaps are not as biased, more casual etc.
nonetheless, I have not read many rock memoirs, only this and the maynard james keenan memoir as system and tool are my two favorite bands of all time. while their life stories were drastically different, i enjoyed them both as both have incredibly creative outlooks on life. without diving too much into a comparison, here's what I loved about down with the system
Serj has always had a way with words, though i'm sure there were ghostwriters, editors etc, this is a man who has been comfortable writing (think understanding oil) for decades, so without knowing how much of a hand ghostwriters had in this project, his fingerprint is unmistakably all over it. there is a certain flow and lyricism to the writing itself that one would expect from serj. It is funny, silly, smart and honest. It is well written which is really a necessity for a good book.
the historical deep dive into the armenian genocide really took me back to my university studies on the holocaust. truly the pain and horror felt by his grandparents and the armenian people in that era recounted in such detail was difficult to read, but really important. it helped slow down my own life, take a deep breath and really appreciate the air. I forced myself to learn about the armenian genocide as a young teen after being exposed to SOAD, but hearing the tale so personally was harrowing and deeply impacting. as a student of history, geopolitics, a father and a Catholic, it was gripping. on the basis of that alone I can recommend the book.
as an artist myself, so much of serj's journey resonated with me. the way art awakens something in you. the power of art for arts sake. the contentedness one strives to feel regardless of something being understood, demanded, monetized, not demanded, not understood etc it spoke so much to me. being unapologetic in making music regardless if anyone wants to hear it. i love that.
unlike mjks memoir which did not touch much on music, serj gave really deep dives into inspirations for particular songs (deer dance, chop suey!, war, bounce, prison song)., albums, lyrics, the songwriting process and a more intimate look at the band dynamic through his eyes. In particular, the background to the lyrics of toxicity added an entirely new layer of awesomeness to that song. I have a really in depth breakdown on the lyrics to that song somewhere on this subreddit, and it was very satisfying personally to see how close I was flying to the target, but also to see the inspiration for the song, where serj came up with it and the mindset he was in when he wrote it.
i can imagine if i were the rest of the band, i would be irritated with serj at how they were depicted. there is a clear indication that the band places the band at the center of their respective universes and they are extremely rigid creatively. at times they are depicted as sneaky, petty, profit-driven and at times irrational. i can only imagine daron and the rest of the crew probably have some specific stories to share about how they think serj is a jerkoff too, but there is def. some personal tension that anyone can clearly read in this book despite the band insisting the hold up has been creative all of these years.
i am glad though he paid specific respect to daron. in many ways it was satisfying to see serj acknowledge that daron always puts the music first and that he is obsessed to a degree with the music and doing what he feels is best for the music. as a fan of the music, i really appreciate that because clearly that has lead to incredible moments in the catalog.
i continue to be one of the hold outs on this subreddit that hopes these guys compromise with one another and give us one last legendary album. after reading this book, it only reaffirms what we've all been saying - it seems unlikely. in order for it to happen, serj will need to be allowed to bring more songs. that seems to be the only way and he will have to do more shows than he would like. those seem like two non-starters.
according to serj - daron seems to see serj writing more for the band as an attack on his ability as a songwriter. john sees that as upending the way they've always done things. on the flipside, it seems that the two most recent songs were extremely micromanaged by daron which does not bode well for the type of artistic freedom serj is clearly seeking and also in some ways hurt the songs imo at least (speaking specifically on how high up in the volume mix daron was and how prominent his vocals played).
it seems like the band is on the cusp any minute of announcing that they will no longer play together, and yet serj ropes the fans back in saying that he really enjoyed 2023 sick new world. as a fan begging for new music it was a roller coaster.
Nonetheless, I'm sorry my thoughts are all over the place, I'm just giving my immediate reaction so it's all very raw and I haven't reflected on it much. I'd love to discuss with anyone but overall, I genuinely enjoyed the book.

Am I wrong for soft ghosting one of my “friends”?
Wow, this one might me a long one.
So I moved to (undisclosed location) sometime in the beginning of last year. When I moved here I really had no friends but became heavily involved in this yoga studio I went to and slowly but surely started to make friends/acquaintances with the teacher that instructed me.
From afar she seemed super cool and I became pretty enthralled with her and her life. I would look forward so heavily to going to her classes every week and was quite intrigued by her. I thought she was funny, bubbly, spunky, cool, and always made jokes during class that made me laugh. As months went by I found myself wanting to get closer and closer to her, and she even invited me out one time to one of her “events” she was hosting. Here’s the thing;
It seemed like we had a lot in common and was just generally craving camaraderie and connection. I felt a sense of belonging with her and wanted to expand that energy in my life, and wanted to do anything I could to get closer to her for those reasons. But I guess this is where we have the first red flag;
One day after class, she extended an invitation to me to a meet up of sorts, (I’m being sparing with details just out of fear she might read this) and when she invited me it seemed like it was gonna be this big thing with lots of people invited, and just in general in talking to her it seemed as if she was very well connected and respected within her community, had lots of friends and connects, and I thought this was gonna be a huge thing that I was even lucky to be invited to. I was super stoked and exited about it.
However when the day of the event came, I was super tired and slow to getting up that morning. I figured I would just make my way over whenever I could since it seemed causal and like you could drop in whenever. I also figured there would be more than enough people that no one would really even notice my arrival or departure. (Plus, sometimes it’s chic to be fashionably late ;) ). Well…. I was most definitely wrong.
When I showed up I heard someone excitedly shout my name, which was her, and she waved me down to the “meet up”…. There was literally only one person there and it had been going on for 2+ hours. I was definitely a bit unnerved, but also didn’t want to be rude, and like I said I was just kind of happy to be there and be getting invited to things. But it was kinda like, damn…. Are these all the friends you have?
I had dressed up and looked cute but they were just kind of wearing whatever and I felt awkward and overdressed and also embarrassed now that I was even this late because it was clearly much more intimate than I expected and my arrival/absence was DEFINITELY felt. We had chatted a bit and that was cool but then I remember her confessing me that she had cried to her husband earlier that morning that she was scared nobody was going to show up and how thrilled she was that not only one, but TWO people had showed up and that it felt like she had friends. I wasn’t really sure what to say or make of that.
She also…. The whole time (and mind you, this is our first legitimate interaction out of yoga class) just kind of kept talking maniacally AT me, not to me, and was coming off almost even manic, and she had formed a white crust of spit around her mouth probably from talking so much that I couldn’t look away from. To say the least, I was a bit disturbed coming away from this interaction but I just kept telling myself that I was being too judgmental of her and to give it a chance and that maybe she was just hyper that day and that I had probably had unintentional embarrassing hygiene moments as well. So I keep going to class and that’s that.
There were several other red flag moments between this first interaction and the next one, mostly just her incredibly cringey social media presence that I genuinely almost couldn’t stand to see without feeling like I was withering away inside, but maybe I’ll save that for later. It’s almost like I couldn’t just see that the person I thought was so cool in class and the person I was seeing her be online and outside of class were the same people. But I digress.
She had actually ended up inviting me to go with her on one of her international yoga retreats, and I was actually very excited about this. I had very little time with her in between classes, and my attraction (but also repulsion) with her was growing stronger and I wanted to figure her out and see what she was really about and what the pull I was feeling towards her was about. Plus, I love travelling and just thought it would be fun.
I had a pretty good time, but we didn’t get to talk much, HOWEVER, I do remember this distinct point during the trip where it was myself, 2-3 other fiends I had made, her brother, and her “best friend” who had happened to be her brother’s Gf in a room together, talking. the brother, the best friend, and the other friend I made just all completely started talking shit about her and I was so confused.
I felt super hurt by this actually, bc I felt like I had a inexplicable bond with the teacher who had invited me, she was the reason we were all there in that beautiful place, and I just couldn’t understand why they were choosing to be so negative about someone I thought they had claimed (at least by title) to love. They would say things like “I can’t fucking stand your sister” (one of the friends I made to the brother) and everyone would just sigh and put their hands in their head and be like “I know…. I know. It’s a lot. She’s a lot”. And I didn’t have anything to add to the conversation because I was just so confused and I knew the girl would just be so upset if she heard them saying this. Anyway… that confusion stuck with me for a while after.
Fast forward maybe a month or two, I started hanging out with her more regularly myself outside of class. I would say this is when we became more “friends”. She would invite me to other teachers classes and we would talk a lot about our lives.
I learned how she felt about her close friend and family connections, and how she often felt hurt and betrayed by people close to her and how some of her friends were actually really shady. I just got a general sense of her feeling scapegoated and libeled against by ppl that got close to her and how she had walls up for that reason.
She also shared to me that most of her family was cut off, with the exception of her brother who she had recently rekindled a connection with, hence why he was on that trip. I felt very bad for her and wanted to be a source of comfort and support, and she would often comment on how she felt a sense of camaraderie with me since I also (LITERALLY) had no family and how we have to make our chosen family. This was a sweet sentiment, for sure, but I was still sussing out how I felt about her.
So one day, a mutual friend that had been on the trip with us was having a birthday party and I guess that she was invited to it, too. She sat down next to me and I was SUPER excited to see her as I was craving her energy and hadn’t seen her in some time. But then… idk. She had had a lot to drink. I’m fully aware that she’s kind of a quirky individual, and has a way of socializing which I can sometimes find a bit uncomfortable or even intense, (like the first meetup I spoke of) but this time it was even more and seemed to be heightened by the drinking.
Her husband was sitting on her other side and kept trying to interject and insinuate that maybe she was doing a bit much, but I think she was drunk enough to the point that she just found it funny and had no awareness of how she was coming off. There’s not even a way I can describe it really, but she just seemed a bit obsessive over me and kept making jokes that were literally not funny and seemed to have lost all ability to read the room. I also had noticed that she had only had TWO beers and was acting like this already which I found… really strange.
So at some point she goes to the bathroom, and I also get in line for the bathroom about 5 mins later. When I get up to the bathroom, she’s still in there, and there’s a line of about 2 or 3 people ahead of me. When she exits the bathroom she immediately spots me and rushes up to me and just starts… drunkenly spewing.
I can’t even remember what she was saying, but we were in a pretty high class establishment and I remember her gushing over me and was saying “I just want to let you know that I don’t really have friends or let people close to me in my circle but I just want to let you know that YOU are officially in my circle and you have earned friend status to me and I’ve let you in my circle…” or something like that. And I just kept thinking, who tf even says that??? I’m pretty sure the last time I checked that friendship is a two way street and it’s not just a title we bestow onto some “lucky” person and that’s that. Like girl… let ME decide if I want to be friends too first.
It was partially that, and also the way she was drunkenly spewing was so awkward and embarrassing bc I could tell all the other women in line were like who tf is this bitch and why is she saying all this weird stuff and like, does she even know you?? Lol. Just a very odd interaction which again, I kind of wrote off, but the unsettling feeling kind of just kept growing after that point.
Then, the time that I REALLY knew something was up came up about a month later, but there are still some key details of this story that are missing. Perhaps I will discuss them later.
SO. About a month later, she invited me last minute to this concert of sorts. When I got there, I was super excited to be there, the vibes were amazing and we were having so much fun. But she had definitely had a lot, A LOT to drink. I didn’t mind at first, because everyone there seemed severely under the influence, but she would just start randomly kind of lashing out at people in the crowd and she thought it was funny? She first loudly and audibly started making fun of some guys shoes in front of us, and was trying to laugh with me as if I would join in, but when his girl friend turned around and shot her a dirty look, she had the nerve to be self conscious and mad about it. She would loudly poke fun at other people in the crowd too, but not in a ha-ha way, just in a straight up mean and asshole way and I could not understand why she would even do that or why she thought that was funny.
Again, I kind of just awkwardly laughed and brushed it off. But when all was said and done and the concert was closing, she enthusiastically invited me back to go to her house and soak in her hot tub. I kept saying are you sure?? But she was like please, PLEASE come, we have weed, we’ll smoke you out and other things and I wanted to continue the vibes because it sounded fun. And then….. completely downhill.
I had arrived back at their place before she did, but as soon as I saw them go in I knocked. When I walked in, she was pale faced up on the floor, non verbal, pretty much motionless, and staring at the ceiling. I was like oh no… it seemed like she got a bit too much to drink. I waited patiently there for a few mins, unsure of what to do as I had just drove for 45 mins and I was still 25 mins in the opposite direction away from home.
I kind of just sat around, and hoped that she would sober up. I asked if she was drunk… she said no. She ran to her bathroom multiple times while her husband (a complete socially awkward case himself) tried to take care of her while she threw up. I asked her if she puked and she also said no. So I didn’t really know what to do. I was trying to offer support/ empathy but she just kept denying any claims of anything being amiss. Her husband left to pick up a pizza and I probably just should’ve left but I’m telling you I had no idea how to exit their house without making it weird or awkward. And I also was hungry. So I just stayed… and waited for the pizza.
What happened in those 20-30 mins, I don’t even know if I can fully explain. She just became… so FUCKING WEIRD. she clearly was embarrassed that I was seeing her drunk, and I think was trying to over compensate. But she just turned into an absolute freak show and I’ve never been more uncomfortable in my life.
She started hoola hooping in my face, and making these weird gremlin faces and noises at me, fell to the floor, rolled round on the floor while continuing to make the noises, convulsed on the floor, but tried to do it in a funny way, tried to make an interpretive dance for me… I’ve truly never experienced something so uncomfortable in my life. I probably do sound like an asshole, but I swear you would just have to be there to see how a) gross and b) weird and actually scary it was. I was genuinely frightened.
I’ve never seen anyone act like that and I didn’t want to make her more uncomfortable or weird by showing her how clearly uncomfortable I actually was. so I just sat there and tried to laugh. But it probably came off as more of a grimace. And for the record, this woman is 33. I am 26. It was just. Obscene.
And she’s tried to act like and say multiple times that she’s like my “big sister”. Now I’ve seen a lot of drunk behavior, but not this. I wolfed down my pizza, and so did she, and she started to get even more philosophical and weird on me, showing me songs and art which were quite frankly some of the worst things I’ve ever heard in my life, and I left as soon as I could.
I was so shaken and disturbed coming away from this, because like I said earlier, I thought she was a cool girl, but honestly her behavior and lack of control over herself completely terrified me. And it’s not like she was drinking liquor, it was just damn IPAs. And I just did not know what to do.
Some details I will try to add to this story, even though I know it’s monolithic at this point , is that 2 months prior to this she had gotten fired from the studio she worked at.
She had a mental breakdown during class because the manager was being mean to her, and he fired her on the spot. I remember being so angry with the owner, (honestly he IS a piece of shit human being) but I thought he was being sexist by calling her mentally unstable and I thought the way he handled things was unfair.
I went so far as to boycott the studio and completely remove myself from it in support of her and followed her to her new one. After the drunk #2 incident, I didn’t hang out with her very much, and only saw her during her class as I was locked into a certain number of classes I had paid for.
I remember her telling me that she had just started at ANOTHER studio, and got fired 3 days after on her birthday and she was talking about how unfair it was and how much of an asshole that new girl was for firing her… and I believed her. AGAIN.
I went so far as to block that girl on Instagram too, but deep down I kind of knew that she had probably just been fired bc let’s face it… as I was starting to discover, she WAS a lot. and the studio was in an upper class area , catered towards more upper echelon people, and I just don’t think she was fitting that image. I lent her an empathetic ear, because that’s all I would want in that situation.
But where she fucked up was sending me screenshot proof of the text exchange between her and that girl, thinking I would take her side, and later sending me screenshots of another conversation she had with the OTHER manager. She told me that this new girl fired her for bringing her husband to class. In my mind I was like, oh no, is she racist!?! Because her husband was black. But no, that’s not what I read at all.
It was the most reasonable, level headed response to someone ever, and laid out multiple offenses and reasons she didn’t want her at the studio. The reasons were honestly so embarrassing that I don’t know why she would send it to me and think I would side with her. She recently also sent me messages with the other boss and the last thing he says to her is “I hope you get help for your mental illness because whatever you have is serious and will impact all your relationships and business and things that you do”. And honestly I can now say in retrospect that those were the truest words ever spoken.
When I read these texts, I had a look back at my whole relationship with and how she would always paint everyone else to be the villain and how everyone is so mean to HER… and the whole time the common denominator was her. It was always her. And it made me rethink everything.
I’ve even had extensive conversations with some of the other people on her trip that were talking shit and couldn’t stand her and they all told me the same things. How it seemed like she was the coolest person ever and had her shit together and seemed like she was going places… but deep down she was just an absolute mess and pushed everyone away from her. And I no longer felt like I was going crazy.
But like I said, she formed a really close bond with me (I think from her perspective) and said she felt like my big sister and family, and shared all these stories about her feeling isolated and shut out by people, but now here I am, doing the exact same thing to her. Icing her out of my life. And I just wanna ask you guys…
Am the asshole?

Hi, so it will be short , but , hum, so someone been bullying me for a certain period, and one day on a public blog they insulted me, so i acted in anger and told them to kill themsleve, i regretted it and i apologised, but before i post the apologies someone from reddit (osana) posted a screen of it, and like 40 peoples insulted me etc.... i wanted to make a public apologies but i got banned, this was 3weeks ago, and now, they are still peoples stalking me and responding to my posts on others reddits to insult me, even someone told me that i will be deported to china, and im sure at 80% that at least one them will put shit under this post, they dm me to say "you should get therapy, un-install tiktok(idk why) and reddit" like bro , ive made a mistake etc, but i dont think that cyberbullying someone who is ALREADY getting bullied is the correct way to act, i want to end myself, i want to live an happy life and forget this, but people have to come to me + my already existing bully Thanks for reading

TL;DR question: Hey, has anyone successfully leveraged a doctor’s note for an employer’s allowance on remote work? Anything they can share? Looking for pros and cons in experience.
Context: My epileptologist lives in NY (my home state). I’ve lived in TX through my epilepsy journey for about 2yrs+. My current job made me move here because my team is a hybrid role.
I love my job. I love the company I work for. I love my team. Im making decent money.
I want to move home. I’m epileptic and live alone. I take tremendous care of myself, but the loneliness has been a killer. I also have to frequently make trips to see my epileptologist. Epileptologists are almost a rare kind of neurologist to find and where I am in TX, it isn’t feasible for me to find one. UT Health system has neuros who somewhat specialize with epilepsy which I have seen. Working with “what I have” is fine. However, they aren’t overly familiar with reading EEGs is what Ive been told. These neuros have also stated themselves that epileptologists are not truly easy to find at all in the state of TX + with the population being highly dense and super unhealthy, their system is heavily clogged.
But I’m lonely. Depressed. My gf dumped me in January due to distance (plus other issues), and as a result I have suffered 2 seizures since - breaking a streak of a yr + change without a seizure. I live in a state where driving is needed 90% of the time. My specialist in NY is top notch. Recently my mom went into the hospital for approximately a week due to heart troubles. She and my dad are both 73 and they are deathly afraid of dying without anything set up for their kin. They run a business that has helped us all through life and support my return home to be closer to them as they age, for me to be around should shit hit the fan with me, and so that I can understand the basics more fluently in running their business. Therapy has been helpful, but not
Regarding what Id say to my doctor, I’d state that “I have to fly in often for our visits which raises expenses; I am alone and fearful of seizures without a support circle; I cannot risk losing my license in TX whereas in NY i have very strong public transportation options; I am lonely and my therapist has indicated I am suffering from depression….my mood in NY is dramatically improved due to the support circles I’ve cultivated there most of my life whereas in TX, my mood lately has dropped and spiraled into depressive loopholes. All of such I worry is creating stress and affecting my ability to sleep (due to stress)….these are the most common triggers for me.”
When it comes to the severity of my issue, I am classified as a generalized epileptic currently on 300mg Lamotrigine and have generally controlled my seizures. EEG readings used to read 7sec long abnormalities without medicine throughout the day. Such have been reduced mainly to 1-3sec abnormalities - a significant improvement. Doctor is proud of my hard work around my direct medicinal treatment (diet, cadence of meds, general positive dedication to self-care like adherence to sleeping regularly when I can, exercising often, combatting mental hurdles with coping skills).
Thoughts on requesting a note to have in back-pocket for when I open the conversation with work on remote options/remote teams given my circumstances? Looking for any advice, general success and failure stories, and what to look out for.

“So me and my bf were living together and I had been busy lately working and had just gotten off work and got home he was in bed and he had asked for me to give him head and I said yes because I felt like I had been neglecting him because I had been so busy and then when I started initiating stuff I felt something behind his back while he was laying down and it was a note book and it had a Polaroid of a naked women on it and I was like wtf wtf is this and he said that he told me he needed help tryna get off and I was like no no you said you never even touch yourself and I flipped through it and it was a bunch of Polaroids and letters under them and I could feel the pain in my dream and I packed my shit up and left in a truck that Iv never had and had to go on some long ass road trip and really wanted to go to Starbucks and that’s when I woke up”
Reality: we’ve only actually been together for 4 months he’s a great guy and I believe he would never as so much as even look at another women in that type of way and he’s never given me a reason not to trust him, this dream was super random and I want to see what y’all have to say about it. We do not live together either.