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X
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Anuel AA
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Oficial)
Añadir a la cola
ASÍ CONOCÍ A LUZGAMING EN PERSONA Sentimental
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submitted by adriancha to YoutubePromotionn [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 22:19 theeldestboy222 Self Sabotage, Student, haven't studied in past 7 years. now can't read properly and understand text.

What is the right approach for this situation ? TLDR - Self Sabotage ,Student , haven't studied for past 7 years . Now can't read properly and understand text.
Story goes like this - Never Studied in life (the way and actual student studies , just listened in class and went tuition and just opened books before exams and still got very high marks so everybody started expecting a lot from me . That was my whole identity like I was the guy who just scores good marks . But in reality I didn't even put 10% effort what an ideal student does and feel guilty about that , about not working hard and wasting time . I believe it was luck because sometimes what I read before exams only that questions came and now my luck has run out . So have to resort to hardwork . Here comes the real problem as I never learnt how to learn i am facing problem to learn now. Along with this I have a lot of bad habits . Extreme Procrastination , 24×7 Mobile phone , social media overuse , doom scrolling and just wasting time watching movies and TV . This continues since past 7-8 years . Completely. Close to 2920 days . That's a lot of time I have wasted . My greatest vice is porn and masturbation addiction. I have tried to quit cold turkey or by willpower but can't last more than 2-3 days and fall back to same pattern for months . I think due to combination of all these habits my brain has fried completely and now I can't even read properly. I can't even watch a YouTube video properly anymore . I just doom scroll and sleep and eat . No physical exercise. I tried going to gym for 4 months but it didn't help one bit or maybe my approach was wrong. Now I have again fallen into bad eating habits and gained weight (120KGS). This is no way life should be lived. I want to be happy and proud of myself for just one day in my life before I due where I don't hate and despise myself . I am a 20 years old guy from India . The worst situation is I know what to do. I just don't do it even though I know what to do . Now I know no one can do it for me and I have to do it myself but I couldn't. Watched 1000 of self help videos, didn't apply anything and still am same . Bought self help books but didn't read a single page . Have wasted a lot of money of my parents but they still support me so I have to do something good for them for once in my lifetime . I know I want to change and how to change and what to change. But I just don't do it . I am stuck in a very dangerous loop . Guilt shame and regret has consumed me with self hatred . Why do I do this self sabotage and how can I get started from today ? Have went to doctors multiple times and taken meds but didn't help so have decided to do this myself .
submitted by theeldestboy222 to GetStudying [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 22:18 theeldestboy222 Self Sabotage , Student, haven't studied in past 7 years. Now can't read properly and think clearly

What is the right approach for this situation ? TLDR - Self Sabotage ,Student , haven't studied for past 7 years . Now can't read properly and understand text.
Story goes like this - Never Studied in life (the way and actual student studies , just listened in class and went tuition and just opened books before exams and still got very high marks so everybody started expecting a lot from me . That was my whole identity like I was the guy who just scores good marks . But in reality I didn't even put 10% effort what an ideal student does and feel guilty about that , about not working hard and wasting time . I believe it was luck because sometimes what I read before exams only that questions came and now my luck has run out . So have to resort to hardwork . Here comes the real problem as I never learnt how to learn i am facing problem to learn now. Along with this I have a lot of bad habits . Extreme Procrastination , 24×7 Mobile phone , social media overuse , doom scrolling and just wasting time watching movies and TV . This continues since past 7-8 years . Completely. Close to 2920 days . That's a lot of time I have wasted . My greatest vice is porn and masturbation addiction. I have tried to quit cold turkey or by willpower but can't last more than 2-3 days and fall back to same pattern for months . I think due to combination of all these habits my brain has fried completely and now I can't even read properly. I can't even watch a YouTube video properly anymore . I just doom scroll and sleep and eat . No physical exercise. I tried going to gym for 4 months but it didn't help one bit or maybe my approach was wrong. Now I have again fallen into bad eating habits and gained weight (120KGS). This is no way life should be lived. I want to be happy and proud of myself for just one day in my life before I due where I don't hate and despise myself . I am a 20 years old guy from India . The worst situation is I know what to do. I just don't do it even though I know what to do . Now I know no one can do it for me and I have to do it myself but I couldn't. Watched 1000 of self help videos, didn't apply anything and still am same . Bought self help books but didn't read a single page . Have wasted a lot of money of my parents but they still support me so I have to do something good for them for once in my lifetime . I know I want to change and how to change and what to change. But I just don't do it . I am stuck in a very dangerous loop . Guilt shame and regret has consumed me with self hatred . Why do I do this self sabotage and how can I get started from today ? Have went to doctors multiple times and taken meds but didn't help so have decided to do this myself .
submitted by theeldestboy222 to getdisciplined [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 22:00 MadMedic21 Another Comprehensive Guide From a Caregiver and ACLr Recipient

Hi all! First off, so glad this sub reddit exists because it was a life saver when I was making decisions on my own ACLr and knowing what to expect from surgery. I'm a 2x cancer surviver, Paramedic, Rugby player, and now have been a caregiver to my partner who just celebrated 3 months from her own ACLr. I collected a bunch of advice and tips and tricks that I have used both during cancer treatment, my own experience with ACLr, and now through care taking my partner through hers. I know there have been guides before, but mine is a bit different and aimed at caregivers so I thought I'd post it here since ya'll helped me so much instead of it just circulating the rugby community every time a teammate or friend has to have ACLr or some other reconstruction. Hope it's allowed and helps!
A Cancer Patients Guide To Knee Reconstruction Recovery
A Comprehensive Guide To Surviving and Thriving In the Pre and Post-op Period Built From The Perspective of Caretaker and Patient.
Before The Date
__/__/____

Preparation

It is important to adequately prepare for surgery in the weeks and days leading up to the procedure. A significant period of immobility and reliance on support can be expected immediately post-op and will vary by procedure and personal experience. Physical modification of living space and thorough preparation allows for the immediate post-op period to be free of emergency store runs and the small inconveniences that can add up to big frustration. Not having food and drink nearby as well as other essentials may be a small deal now, but can turn into a big deal when you can no longer get those things for yourself. While physical preparation (home modifications, adaptive tools, meal prepping, etc.) are important, mental preparation is crucial to the long term success of the repair. Making small, achievable goals in the immediate post-op period and maintaining a long sighted view of recovery will make the pain and immobility that is initially experienced more bearable. Additionally, social support through a partner, family members, or friends is an essential part of recovery, as is maintaining contact with sports teams or other social groups during rehabilitation.

General PEARLs

Days Leading Up To Surgery

Day Of And Immediate Post-Surgery Phase

submitted by MadMedic21 to ACL [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 21:49 papillonnette "One Strike Away", a catchy (formerly lost media, recently found) song chronicling the history of the Boston Red Sox (from Babe Ruth to Buckner and beyond)

Hey everyone!
Just wanted to share an incredibly catchy song I recently found/unearthed, that chronicles the trials/tribulations of the pre-2004 Boston Red Sox, from Babe Ruth to Buckner (1986 World Series) & beyond:
"One Strike Away" by the Wet Paint Band (1990)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzgt-jUJuj8
I first heard this song in the early 90s, performed live in a baclub on Yawkey Way across from Fenway. I remember loving this song and paying $5 for a cassette that the band was selling, and we used to listen to it over and over, even putting it on a mixtape.
Fastforward to 2024 -- for some reason I thought of this song and tried to find it again, but could not find any trace of the existence of the song. (I had long since lost the original cassette.) After several attempts to ask about the song at various forums like redsox, I decided to recreate the song from scratch (entirely based off of 20-year-old memory - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rb-bxpHU-CQ) and start a thread at Lostwave . Based on some sleuthing, including uncovering a cached page of a 1991 magazine mentioning the song, we managed to track down the original band, who recently reached out personally to me (1) mentioning they themselves pretty much forgot about the song, and (2) sending me an .mp3 along with permission to share it / upload to YouTube!
Wet Paint Band is based in Rhode Island and still performs gigs off/on, including a recurring spot at PEG-RI PBS network where they cover 50's/60's/70's oldies songs. I have contact with one of the band members directly and am trying to convince them to do another live performance :p
Really enjoyed this song and it is a great crash course on the storied history of the Red Sox, from Babe Ruth to Ted Williams to Yaz to Clemens -- even got some positive comments from Yankees fans (respect!). Happy to unearth and preserve it from being "lost to time" and hope some people here enjoy it!
submitted by papillonnette to baseball [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 21:49 pilotslashCPA Write-Up: Zero to CFII in 13 months, Part 61, $52K

Hi all! After a crazy, but incredibly fun and rewarding year earning my pilot certs, I wanted to make a write-up of my experience in hopes that it’ll be helpful for any other aspiring or current pilots. To summarize, I went from zero aviation experience to CFII in 13 months, Part 61, paying as I go and on the pretty cheap side. I do want to emphasize that I was ~incredibly~ lucky and had some very generous people who helped me out, and I could not have done this as efficiently and cheaply if it weren’t for them. I’m going to list all my takeaways below, but I think my biggest piece of advice is to network as much as you can because there are some amazing, generous people in this community that want to see us all succeed.
Background:
For context, I’m in my mid to late twenties and have been in the workforce for about 5 years. Through a combination of factors I decided to make a career switch to professional pilot but was hesitant because I did not want to take on debt. I have a family member who is an airline pilot who helped me devise a plan. I moved home and kept working my job remotely so I was able to put all my paychecks towards flying.
Private Pilot – 3 months, 75 hours TT, $12k
I did my private in a Piper Archer owned by my local FBO. The owner allowed my family member to be my instructor and gave me a small discount for pre-paying hours. We flew almost daily. I also took ground school at another local FBO in-person, and that was much more helpful than having to learn everything on my own because I was brand new to aviation. I took the private written exam as soon as my ground school concluded which was also the week of my checkride (bad idea in hindsight, but it worked out).
I solo’d around 25 hours and took my checkride with about 60 hours in the Archer (15 additional hours were in a friend’s airplane). The checkride was challenging, but straightforward and I was well prepared. The DPE said good things about me afterward and I was officially a private pilot! I’d be happy to answer questions or do a writeup in a separate post on any of my checkrides but for the sake of brevity I’ll skip that for now.
~Key takeaways from private:~
Fly as often as possible and make sure your instructor is aligned with that. Also stay on top of ground school. Also, don’t rush to take the checkride before you’re ready, it’s okay to have a lot of practice first. Lastly, I know DPE availability is a big issue in lots of areas and can cause people to have to wait on a checkride even though they’ve been ready for months. In my experience, if you try hard enough and call around, you will find someone. However, it might mean you have to travel a little bit which I know is not possible for everyone.
Instrument – 2 months, 150 hours TT, $14k
I was feeling a little fatigued after private so I was slow to start studying for instrument. I started by doing a lot of flying for fun, mainly flying in the Archer by myself on little cross countries to check off some of the requirements (in hindsight I should have found someone to split time with).
I did my instrument at a flight school in one of the adjacent states. This particular school specializes in accelerated programs, but they do not have a formalized instrument course. I went in-person and spoke with the director of flight operations to discuss my options. Since I had to take PTO to do this, the goal was to finish my instrument in one week with the checkride at the end. I paid a flat rate for the airplane and instructor time. I also stayed over there during that week so I had to pay for housing as well.
Before I went over there, I did some prep in the Archer that I did my private in and took the written exam (Sheppard air). I also purchased Sporty’s Instrument course and used that to prep and for the endorsement needed to take the written. The week I spent at the flight school was honestly a blast, and I was able to take my checkride on day 7 with 20 hours in the plane and about 4 hours of sim time. Again, happy to discuss the checkride in the comments or another post.
~Key takeaways from instrument:~
TAKE THE IRA, FII, AND IGI EXAMS AT THE SAME TIME. You only have to purchase the IRA Sheppard course and can take all 3 exams back to back. Also, again stay on top of ground school because instrument flying requires a lot of technical knowledge. But it honestly is really fun!
Commercial – 3 months, 263 hours TT, $8k
The biggest challenge for commercial was time building, of course. This is where networking saved me. I made friends with another instructor who frequented my local FBO who also owns a plane. He needed the time as well so we flew together a lot and I paid for the fuel. I also had another friend at the airport who owns a plane that he doesn’t fly often and offered to let me time build in that (again, I’ve been so lucky to come across some very generous people).
I did my checkride in the Archer that I learned in with my family member signing me off, and with the same DPE who did my private. Commercial was probably the easiest one I had done so far, but it still was no joke! I will say I was amazed with how much easier things came to me by this point versus when I first started, which was a great feeling.
~Key takeaways from commercial:~
Network, network, network. Spend as much time as you can at your local FBO or flight school and make friends with everyone. Like I’ve said, there are some very generous people out there who love to help out new pilots, and I could not have made it this far without them.
Also, in retrospect, it would have been a really good idea to have done commercial from the right seat. I’ve heard of a lot of people doing that and if I had, I would have been able to knock out CFI a lot sooner and cheaper.
Multi-engine add-on – 1 week, 298 hours TT, $4.3k
Shortly after getting my CPL, I had a week of PTO and decided to knock out my multi add-on. I found a flight school with a Seminole and got ahold of their MEI, and we figured we could knock it out during that week. I contacted the DPE who did my private and commercial and we scheduled my checkride for the end of the week. This flight school was about 2 hours driving from home, and I was able to stay with friends while I was there.
This one was a little challenging because this was in January in the midwest and we were seeing a lot of low IFR days. We ended up getting weathered out the first half of the week, but luckily the Seminole was an easy transition for me and we got me trained up in 3 days, 8 hours of flying. I took the checkride as scheduled and passed (I will say I have had extremely good luck with weather for all of my checkride days so far).
Sidenote: Prior to this checkride, I also took the AGI and IGI exams and asked the DPE who did my multi checkride to sign off on the ground instructor certificate at the same time. I did this because I’ve heard it helps when applying to CFI jobs (shows a little extra effort) and it was easier to do it this way versus having a FSDO issue the cert. Cost me $50 to the DPE.
~Key takeaways from multi:~
Do your research to find an airplane at a good rate. I paid $395 per hour which included the instructor, but I’ve seen some schools charging a lot more. Also, I looked into schools with accelerated courses that you pay as a package, and based on my experience I would not recommend because I was able to do it much cheaper my way.
My instructor did a good job of making sure I knew all the aircraft systems well enough to teach them in case I go for my MEI (which I would like to do soon). Since the MEL is light on material, I highly recommend this. Also, when I was doing research I was told to look for a Seminole or DA-42 because they’re easy trainers, which I would agree with based on my limited experience.
CFI – 1 month (on top of all my experience thus far), 316 hours TT, $5k
This was the scariest one for me. I had heard all along that CFI is the hardest and longest checkride and for the most part I would agree. I originally was planning on going to a school with an accelerated program for this, but after asking around I decided to do it on my own (with my family member signing me off).
This one was heavy on ground school. I got some lesson plans from various people as I heard that’s what everyone has prepared for the checkride, but I hardly ended up using them. I also had a friend send me PowerPoints he made for the technical subject areas. I edited them/made them my own and these are what I ended up using for the checkride along with a couple props.
As far as studying goes, the thing I found most helpful was watching random YouTube videos before bed every night. Although it was all review, I picked up a lot of tidbits that weren’t quite drilled into my brain as I still feel new to aviation overall. As the DPE described it, to be a good CFI you basically need to be a nerd about everything aviation and that’s what I tried to do. I would guess that I studied a few hours a day for a month and a half or so. As for the flying part, I had a little bit of right seat experience prior to buckling down for CFI (probably under 5 hours), so I’d guess it took me about 5 more hours to feel comfortable in the right seat. I took the checkride with the same DPE who did my private, commercial, and multi and passed! The checkride was 8 hours total so definitely a long day. As we were debriefing, I went ahead and scheduled CFII with him as well.
~Key takeaways from CFI:~
Start nerding out now (if you aren’t already). Keep a running collection of links and videos that explain concepts well or teach you something interesting, they will be useful for the checkride. Also, don’t buy lesson plans. As my DPE put it, there are really only like 5 lesson plans for any given topic and we all steal them from each other, so no need to reinvent the wheel or pay for them if someone else can give them to you. I’d also recommend really getting to know the PTS, because it lays out very clearly what you are required to do on the checkride (for example you know you’re going to need to teach runway incursions so it’s a good opportunity to be really prepared). I’m sure my last point is most applicable to those doing CFI on their own since you won’t have a school telling you exactly what to expect.
CFII – 1 month, 368 hours TT, $1.3k
CFII was possibly the easiest checkride to prepare for. I did this one in a friend’s airplane – a Mooney with a G750 and GFC 500 autopilot. It probably took about 10 hours of flying (I already have lots of time in this plane) to be ready. For studying, I reviewed Pilot Cafe, YouTube videos, and obtained some lesson plans from a friend. I did not use PowerPoints or anything for this one. I also had already completed the written exam back when I did my instrument rating. I’m not sure what else to say about this one, but I did it with the same DPE again and passed. It feels amazing to be done with checkrides for a while!
~Key takeaways from CFII:~
Select an airplane with a good autopilot. This made the flying portion of the checkride super easy. For the oral, I highly recommend working with instructors who send students for a lot of instrument checkrides. I feel like there are so many very specific questions that DPEs like to ask on instrument/CFII checkrides, so it helps if you have someone who knows what those questions are going to be. Also, FlightInsight on YouTube and Boldmethod were my favorite resources for this one. Lastly, make sure you know your avionics and autopilot really well, including reading and being able to teach all of the limitations that are in the user manuals.
Notes regarding cost:
I did a decent job of tracking all my expenses throughout this process. I noted in the title that the total cost to me was about $50k, which consists of the ~$45k that I discussed above plus some additional expenses. I also did my commercial ASES rating at Jack Brown’s seaplane base which cost me about $2.5K total (of course this was just for fun). The remaining amount consists of things like buying a headset, books, random accessories, and even some things I called “unnecessary expenses”. I temporarily paid for a membership at a flight school that I barely ended up using, so I put that in that category. While I did everything pretty cheap, I was definitely not perfect!
Here is a further breakdown of my expenses:
Airplane rentals/fuel - $36.9k
Instructor fees - $2.5k (bear in mind I got a lot of free instruction from friends & family)
Ground school - $1.3k (includes actual ground school and books)
Flight accessories - $1.2k
Written exam fees - $1.2k (8 exams total)
DPE fees - $5.8k (7 checkrides; this includes seaplane)
Medical fees - $290
Housing - $900
Misc/unnecessary expenses - $1.2k
Total: $51.7k
Overall Takeaways:
- For those doing Part 61/pay as you go, I highly recommend finding an independent instructor with a flexible schedule. This was key for me because I had a work schedule to work around.
- NETWORKING/MAKING FRIENDS. Go to every fly-in you can, always stop into the FBO to say hi to people, etc. etc. Having friends in aviation was monumentally helpful for me and saved me SO much money. Cannot stress this enough!
- If you are on a timeline, make sure you set specific milestones and when you are going to hit them. Make sure your instructor is on board too.
- Do your research! Reddit has been a fantastic resource for me throughout this process. Talk to people who have achieved the things you want to achieve. I really cannot thank you all enough for all your help and insights on your experiences!
Again, I am more than happy to answer any and all questions. I also apologize if anything is jumbled or confusing; this took a long time to write and I’m sure I missed things. I will also disclaim that while I did a good job of tracking all my expenses, I was not perfect and YMMV for sure. I just hope this gave a somewhat helpful picture for those hoping to do something similar to what I did.
As for next steps, I am aiming for the airlines one of these days! I have a couple interviews at flight schools coming up so I am planning to quit my job and finally start flying full-time soon. I want to do my MEI sometime soon as well but I haven’t figured out how I’m going to pay for the PIC time yet.
I also want to say that I absolutely love general aviation and hope to always be involved in it. I have made so many friends, had some incredible experiences, and learned way more than I could have ever imagined in the past year. For anyone thinking about flying, hopefully this is your sign to just do it! Feel free to comment with questions!
submitted by pilotslashCPA to flying [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 21:31 another_FI_throwaway Thought I was fine with (our unconventional) ENM, but now I don't think I am and my wife seems over-invested

I'll start with our background. We started dating in our late teens, were both raised very conservative and religious, but have not been for a very long time. Between dating and being married we've been together nearly 20 years. We both only had 1 sexual partner prior from previous relationships that we both thought were mistakes and wish we'd been each other's first. I definitely have a stereotypical guy high libido, but I'd always thought I didn't need a bunch of sexual conquests because I'd be happy just doing all those things with the person I love.
 
Along the way my wife came out as bi. This didn't bother me at all, especially with her stance at the time of "It just means I also find women attractive just like I find some other men attractive, but I'm married and happy with you so that's not something I need act on". She said she'd probably been bi a long time, but took a long time to admit it to herself due to religious upbringing. I also have an unconventional curiosity. Basically I'm a straight guy, but I happen to find dicks attractive at times despite not being attracted to the rest of the male body. About 3-ish years ago she brought up the topic of if she could act on her curiosities with women. She wanted to try making out and maybe playing with boobs, but seemed extremely hesitant at the prospect of anything below the waist. Since she brought that up I asked about if I'd be able act on my curiosity, with a bonus benefit of maybe it being an outlet for me as well with our struggling sex life (at the time she had a very low libido and I'd get rejected 95% of the time when I tried to initiate sex). After discussing we essentially ended up opening the marriage with the boundaries being:
Now initially I felt completely fine with the prospect of her fooling around with women. I guess it was just kinda the typical male fantasies of 2 women getting sexual together being hot and who knows if that'd potentially lead to a threesome later (though she no gave indication of that being a possibility). She seemed more hesitant at the prospect of me acting on my curiosities, but gave permission since she thought it only seemed fair if she was allowed to act on hers. I started looking after that and ended up finding a pre-op trans woman. This kinda clicked with me since I was attracted to dick, but not male bodies. We met up and she fucked me. Physically things felt good, but the combination of it being my first time having casual sex and it being very unconventional sex made it feel really awkward for me. Afterwards I felt terrible, like I had cheated. When I told my wife I was literally trembling. She was shocked that I actually did it, and said she felt a little weird but that ultimately she was fine with it. I felt better after she wasn't mad or anything. Now a more stereotypical big kink for me is anal, but I've hardly ever got to try it to even know if it lives up to the reputation of the fantasy I've built up of it in my head. My wife had always been super dead set against even trying it, eventually let me try a couple of times after we'd been married for years, but essentially had her mind made up it was going to be terrible before we even got started so that kinda fell flat despite technically getting to try it. I asked if I could try anal with a trans woman since cis women were off the table. She gave me permission, then a small number of weeks later I met up with the same trans woman and fucked her. Despite physically feeling good, it still felt super awkward to me. I basically ended up coming away with the lesson that casual sex isn't all it's cracked up to be and I HIGHLY prefer sex be with someone I'm very emotionally attached to (aka, my wife).
 
I texted my wife at work to let her know right after it happened. Apparently she let out an audible "god dammit" after she read the text. She said she was fine with it but started kinda giving signs that she was uneasy. It seemed like every few weeks she'd ask in a concerned tone if I'd done anything else since then and I'd tell her I hadn't (the truth) and that if I did I'd tell her. I'd still get horny at times, the fantasy would sound more appealing, I'd browse around online some for an opportunity but between people being flaky and me kinda feeling unsure if I should, nothing ever happened again. I'd mentioned to my wife about browsing around some and I can't remember her specific words now but it gave me the feeling she wasn't crazy about it. Eventually I told her I'd basically given up on that and deleted my relevant accounts. Her response was "good", and not long after that she gave me a hug and said she just prefers monogamy. She didn't explicitly say I couldn't do anything else or that the marriage was closed, but it seemed soft closed after that. I'd occasionally fantasize about my stuff, but post nut clarity after porn was basically that the fantasy was more enticing than the reality. She never attempted to search out someone for her curiosity during this time.
 
The beginning of last year my wife got off her birth control that she'd been on for years. A month or two after that her libido started to come back and things have been great. We'd been very fulfilled and don't feel like I need any other outlet. Early this year she mentioned she wanted to try to act on her curiosity now and asked if I was still ok with it. I said I was, and I guess it seemed fair given I got to act on mine before. It was still the same boundaries we set before and she reiterated it'd probably be some infrequent thing. I think she really started in earnest in March. She kissed a friend, but the friend didn't want to go further than that and make things weird. I felt kinda weird, but I still felt fine at that point. Then she started talking to a girl online, met up in public to get to know each other a bit more, gave a kiss goodbye, and had rough plans that when their schedules/privacy aligned they'd meet up for something sexual. I still felt ok at this point, but then my wife started borderline getting obsessed and it started making me more and more uneasy. She hadn't even done anything with this girl yet but was talking about trying to do this every couple of weeks, saying very poorly worded things such as "what does 'romantic relationship' even mean?" (she later clarified on that, but at the time sure felt like she was purposely trying to push on boundaries). When she could tell I was getting uneasy she'd say stuff like "if you pull the plug on this then I won't be happy not getting to explore this part of myself". There were 2 separate times that when her plans with a woman got cancelled she was so distraughtly disappointed that couldn't get back to sleep and had to call in to work because she had horribly under slept.
 
She talks about how I owe her at least 2 times since that's what I got, but she's kissed 5 women since this started, fooled around with 2 of them above the waist, and wanted below the waist too but badly timed periods kept her from that. She says none of that counts towards her 2 times because they weren't full on sex. I want to be comfortable with it for her, but I just can't seem to be anymore. I feel like it'd be dickish to cut her off before her 2 times, but even when I talk to her about the prospect of closing the marriage after her 2 times she can never seem to acknowledge that she could accept that. She just says stuff like "I just really hope you don't" and "I hope we can find some compromise where we can both be happy". She now says I can look for a woman to do anal with. I tried to entertain that idea, but ultimately felt like I just don't want to bother with all that hassle for casual sex (further complicated by a lot of people not wanting to deal with married men, and even more complicated by them needing to be up for anal). She's now mentioned she'd try anal with me some more now if that'll make me ok with her stuff. She does specify that I'm the one she loves and wants to spend the rest of her life with and that she's not going to leave me for a woman, but that she wants to explore this part of her sexuality. She's also been very affectionate and sexual with me because she says she doesn't want me to feel like neglected over this. She doesn't explicitly say this, but she acts more like it's a need now instead of a curiosity or want. At this point I'm pretty sure I just want monogamy with her. I want our sex lives to just between us and nobody else being with her like that. I feel like if my curiosity had turned into some big thing I was super excited about to do a bunch and she expressed anywhere near as much turmoil about it as I have then I would've stopped right then and there, or at the extreme least slow walk it until we maybe get on a better page about things.
 
Last weekend she really hurt my feelings. For background, the whole time we've been together she has hardly ever let me go down on her. I always found this strange since women are suppose to love that, but I've got so little experience with it that I don't even know how much I do or don't like doing it. There was one time she let me do it long enough to get her off (though now says she doesn't remember that), and nearly all the other times she stopped me after less than a minute. For the most part I just hardly ever try that anymore since getting shot down so much kinda trains you to not even make attempts very much anymore. I'm also 95% sure a few weeks back while we were discussing things I said I'd be pretty unhappy/hurt if she let a woman go down on her since she pretty much won't let me do that (which she says she doesn't remember me saying). Anyway, she mentioned one of the women wants to meet up again next weekend and that the woman is really eager to go down on her (and my wife implying she was fine with this). I think I was dumbfounded at first, then after I had time to process it I was pretty hurt that she was willing to let a stranger do that when she'd barely ever let me. She was baffled that I was so "hung up" about that. We argued and she eventually said she was fine with me doing that now, wants to do that with me and just hadn't thought about it, and that it'd been about her personal hang ups on it and not about me. I asked if she could just tell the woman not to do that part or say she's not ready for that part yet, but then she was upset that I was "trying to dictate" what she can and can't do when she hooks up. I just really wanted to be the first to explore that properly with her for at least a little while instead of it being with a stranger that's probably far more experienced with it than me (not by my choice). I did get to go down on her for a full session last night, but there's definitely a learning curve when being almost brand new to doing it. I just really wish we could have a month or so to 'get up to speed' on that between ourselves before she's having a stranger do it to her.
 
She says she wants to try to find a compromise where we can both be happy, but it seems like that only means her trying to bribe me but that anything that might limit or slow her down seems to be off the table. I just feel like I'm stuck between the choice of suffering through it, or forcefully shutting it down and her probably being bitter about that, which who knows what other issues that'll cause. I just feel like if the tables were turned and she was this distraught then we'd mutually close the marriage because even if I was disappointed about not getting some fun side activities anymore that I wouldn't want to make her feel terrible or guilty for not wanting it to happen anymore. She does at least say if it came down to it that she'd choose me and the marriage over this, but doesn't know how she'd feel about not being able to anymore. The irony is I'd probably be a lot more likely to be somewhere in the realm of comfortable with her stuff if she felt and expressed anywhere near my level of concern instead of soft bullying me into stopping short of closing the marriage. Since it went downhill my mood about it can vary day to day from anywhere between "not really keen on this" to hating it, upset, and sometimes tearing up. I guess my overall feelings after experiencing this whole situation is monogomy is much simpler and dealing with other sex partners while married is nicer as a fantasy than the actual reality.
submitted by another_FI_throwaway to EthicalNonMonogamy [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 21:17 Icy-Turn-2759 A Cautionary Tale for First-Time Home Buyers

This may become a long post so apologies in advance.
As a first-time home buyer, I want to share a cautionary story about our experience with home remodelling, as I keep on getting DMs every now and then because of a previous comment on a post- about how I was able to get a reasonably priced contractor(which took a weird turn later on)
So, we recently purchased a house in a Very High Cost of Living Area (VHCOL) after a long and grueling process. We were finally able to secure the house by removing all contingencies (based on pre-inspection report) and putting down a substantial earnest money deposit, while releasing half of it to the sellers.
However, our dream house had dated bathrooms and a kitchen, which we were eager to update.(in hindsight, we could have waited a bit so we guess it’s our mistake) We met this amazing contractor who offered us a great rate and discount on materials, but unfortunately, she disappeared mid-project, leaving us high and dry. We shopped for a bit, but the charges were double of what we initially got quoted. With no experience in building or renovating homes, still my husband and I decided to save some money by doing it ourselves as it was the most cost effective option after purchasing the house.
We soon realized that updating the house while working full-time jobs was a monumental task. We drained our emergency funds and spent countless hours researching and learning through YouTube tutorials and multiple trips to home depot. While we're proud of what we accomplished, we wish we had known better before taking on the project.
A Word of Warning
If you're a first-time home buyer without experience in home remodeling, beware! Unless you have the means to update the house on your own, it may be wise to reconsider. We recently purchased a fully updated house for my in-laws, and it's been a blessing. (their previous owner was a contractor)
Few takeaways :
I hope our experience serves as a cautionary tale for fellow first-time home buyers. Happy renovating (or not)!
submitted by Icy-Turn-2759 to FirstTimeHomeBuyer [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 21:15 NAS0824 Home Networking boxes

Do they come standard in newer homes ? Do people run wires and so on themselves and set them up always?
How common is it to have them in homes /apartments?
I’m an IT guy and love the look and convenience of a pre wired organized way to set up network like that at home , and I see vids on YouTube and seems like it’s pretty common but personally i haven’t came across any and am curious about that setup and frequency of it being available these days
submitted by NAS0824 to HomeImprovement [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 21:05 Resident-Refuse-2135 Farm and garden hardware identity please?

Farm and garden hardware identity please?
Here is an odd item I picked up somewhere a few years back. It seems to be mainly galvanized steel, and the crank turns a cylinder made from 1/8" mesh screen inside. My guess is you put something like animal feed or chicken grit in the hopper and turn the crank to sift the pre ground material through into a barrel underneath, any bigger pieces or clumping from humidity remain in the screen tube. Appreciate any definite information you might have, thanks in advance.
submitted by Resident-Refuse-2135 to whatisit [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 20:57 JayARGHHH Interesting! METAS movements are (physically) identical to their non-METAS counterparts

Source: https://youtu.be/AH3f9x4iYC0?si=EMQYXaSbX9W5CNCg&t=377
Turns out there is zero physical/mechanical difference between, for instance, the MT5602-U in the new METAS-certified Black Bay 41 and the old MT5602 in the pre-METAS Black Bay 41.
The only difference is that one has gone through METAS testing (and passed, obv) and the other hasn't been tested.
Props to YouTube watch dude Adrian Barker for asking Tudor this question and including the info in his review of the Black Bay 41 Mono!
edit: jeez a lot of you weirdos are sensitive about this topic haha.
submitted by JayARGHHH to Tudor [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 20:53 soulvoid86 Sena 50C audio quality

I've seen dozens of posts not only on reddit but around the internet about the Sena audio quality. I recently got my first bike and picked up the Sena 50C, mainly for music and the onboard camera to act as a dashcam.
First, battery life is awful when using the cam. I can barely get 2 hours out of it. Is that really normal?
Second, and the main concern is audio quality. All apps, Spotify, YouTube, Pandora, all have terrible audio quality from both speakers. Very bad crackling from the higher frequencies, that sounds similar to a bad tweeter in a high end system.
Third, the mic picking up what it thinks is commands but is just wind noise or me accelerating hard.. Music pauses for a second very consistently.. I've turned off the voice commands which fixed it but like really? Nothing like having to disable the device features because it doesn't work right..
I'm starting to regret my purchase and am trying to judge if I should send it back and get something else. I still have a few weeks to decide what I want to do, not really enough time to deal with support/warranty claims if I want to get a full refund.. I did manage to find it on sale for $400, but I'm very not happy with this purchase so far. Even took me about 3 hours and 4 different known good SD cards to get the firmware to update right out of the box, and no matter what kept failing with the Wi-Fi adapter. I HAD to use my PC, was the only way to update it.. I've been working in IT professionally for 15 years. This is something that should be very easy to complete, especially considering most users are probably not that tech savvy.
Thoughts? Should I send it back and get something else? I've seen people suggesting Cardo with JBL, can anyone else attest to it being that much better than the Sena, or did I just get a bad unit? Built-in camera isn't a requirement, I can just get an Insta360 or an actual dashcam system built for bikes and hardwire it. My Triumph also has a USB port for power so I have a few options I can go with.
Edit: I also see Cardo has a 45mm speaker JBL unit on pre-order right now. Maybe I should hold out for that?
submitted by soulvoid86 to motorcycles [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 20:22 juicycrackfairy The God Hand YouTube Channel?

Hi all, some years back, pre pandemic, I used to work a lot and on my way home I remember I used to listen to a YouTube channel that did the usual chapter reviews and different berserk topics.
I remember the guy used to sign off saying something like “see you later bazonkos, and may the god hand bless you”
I admit I was half paying attention just trying to get home without falling asleep, so I may be misremembering or mixing up different things, but does anyone remember watching this channel back then?
I’ve tried search YouTube, but I mostly get unrelated results or stuff from mighty doll, Ryan or marvelous videos
Thanks to anyone that makes it this far.
submitted by juicycrackfairy to Berserk [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 20:20 xsercafecita My 'f 35' husband 'M 41' has a porn addiction and I don't know what else to do... Advice?

Backstory: We have been married 15 years, 3 years ago we started having issues in the bedroom. He would rarely want to be intimate and when we were he would either not finish or finish too soon. The way he looked at me changed he once stared at me lovingly now changed into hatred. When we went out he started staring at other women something he had never done before. He would look but never fully stare. He was home but not mentally present, like me and the kids would be talking to him and he would answer but it would be about a whole different conversation. Later I found out he had a porn addiction and let me just say I was understanding, I said we should go to therapy. At first he completely denied it, he said he only did it sometimes that there was nothing wrong with it. Which I would have agreed with that statement if it had not been affecting our relationship. It got good for awhile, then it happened again and again and again. Until I got tired and kicked him out, but he didn't leave instead he moped around the house refusing to eat and slept on the couch. Although I wanted to keep the kids out of it he came home saying that I was over reacting and I was selfish, I couldn't hold it any longer and told him he was the one that was selfish for doing this to us and refusing to get help. Anyway, he went on to go to therapy but I don't think he ever talked about the problem he had with porn or anything for that matter.
He stopped for awhile, we put an app on his phone so I could see what he was watching he was trying to reassure me that he was done with all of that. But I was deeply hurt, I once had high self esteem and he managed to break that. I took the app off his phone because I felt like I was going crazy and spent too much time checking up on him instead of focusing on my wellbeing. Later I found out that he was no longer watching porn but he was now getting off on instagram reels, tiktoks, YouTube whatever he could find of women in sexy outfits, bbls, etc. He denied it, but I only found out because I was charging a camera that I use for my dogs and caught him multiple times when I went to delete old videos off the memory card.
I chose to focus on myself after that, but I am so depressed. I see nothing has changed, we are now back to the same spot. No sex, I talk to him about wanting to feel wanted and he tries for a week or two then forgets. He pulls away from my touch, he gets defensive when I grab his phone when he didn't do that before even when he was watching porn. This all happened in the past few weeks and honestly I am done, I am heartbroken I can't stop crying but I am so tired of trying.
I have tried to talk to him but he denies everything he says nothing is wrong. But I know there's something and I can't work on our relationship alone. I am thinking of leaving, but it's so hard thinking of all the years we have been together the life we built. That and that I have been a sahm because that's what he wanted since we got married. But I am not happy anymore, every time I try to be independent he acts like a child and makes the whole house feel uncomfortable. So I choose to keep the peace for my children but I can't keep doing this and letting my kids who are now old enough to understand see how their dad is draining the life out of me.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? What advice if any do you have for me?
submitted by xsercafecita to Marriage [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 20:03 IndependenceWarm8153 The white bmw

It’s a 2007 BMW 335i. It was nice in its day, but it’s not the nicest anymore. The lights don’t work. A few of the speakers are blown out. The steering wheel has been replaced. It’s had hundreds of oil leaks. It’s been sitting so long it probably wouldn’t even start up.
We were 19 years old when my husband bought it. It was the coolest car in our apartment complex. He would never part with it. When we paid it off he said he’ll keep it as long as he can. Even when we were both turning 30 and he got his truck, he loved that car.
That car sat in our driveway on jacks with him and our under it, putting parts on it to lower it. I would bring them cold lemonade and hear them bicker over football and which players were better. Or they’d be in a heated debate over who would win in a fight an elephant or 30 gorillas. I’d hear my husband “Buddy, elephants are like, hella smart they could like figure out how to hit them with their nose” and then our son “but dad.. 30 of them?? You can’t stop 30 of them”
Ever since he passed away, the car means a lot more to me. I don’t let anyone touch it. I don’t even like people inside the garage because I don’t want them near it. The keys are locked in our safe. I’ll protect that car with my life.
Sometimes when our kids are at school I’ll go out and look at it. I’ll think back on all of the memories. Sometimes I’ll sit in the passenger seat but never the driver seat. I make sure nothing is touched. I look at his sunglasses, off to the side a bit in the cupholder. I look at the shifter. It’s up into gear 1, and he’d explain to our son in the backseat you turn it off, then put it into gear, just in case. I look at the steering wheel, he turned it a little to the left so the bumper wouldn’t scrape when he drove into the garage. And it’s perfect. Every scratch, every loose bolt for a part he looked up a YouTube video to figure out how to put on, every sticker including the one I hated that has a porn website on it but he thought it was funny.
It’s perfect because it’s exactly how he left it.
submitted by IndependenceWarm8153 to Marriage [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 19:54 mossy_bee postpartum/hysterectomy routine

hi all! i’m a first time mom of an almost 2 year old. i had my tubes out, 6 weeks after my kid was born. most recently, i had a hysterectomy (only ovaries left). i was cleared about a month ago for full lifting/working out again. i’m 32F, 5’2, 131lbs currently, prebaby i was 125lbs so im really not far off from where i started. i used to train muay thai for years but i can’t keep getting punched in the face anymore lol. i’ve been back at the gym for about 3 weeks. so far i’ve been running a ~10 minute mile, and then doing the circuit of weight machines, doing the PPL method. i wanted to get more intentional with what i’m doing, and work towards actual strength training; as well as toning and refining. i was really strong pre-baby, but i feel like because of my pregnancy and hysterectomy im starting completely over with core strength. any over all recs? just keep going? tia!
submitted by mossy_bee to WorkoutRoutines [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 19:48 Evening_Election_187 [WTS]Gold pre-33, AGE and world. Also a little Silver

https://imgur.com/a/2hL6PnA
Pre-33
1907 $20 Liberty XF $2330 (Melt - $15) BU $2345(Melt)
1882 $5 Liberty $600
Gold
AGE 1996 1oz (low mintage) $2430
Krugerrand 1976 1oz $2420
Libertad 1/4 oz 2023 $640
1 Guinea plugged 1788 $600
1 Sovereign 1912 P $570
20 Francs Rooster 1907 Napoleon 1856 $$450 (Slightly under melt)
10 Rouble 1899 $675
5 Rouble 1898 $355
Silver
250 g Britannia East India bar dings on corners $265 (below melt)
Tube of 25 Libertads 2023 $850
Tube of 20 Queens Virtue 2021 $580 (Melt)
Refco 1oz $32
Shipping is $5
Accept Zelle, Venmo, PPFF
submitted by Evening_Election_187 to Pmsforsale [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 19:13 liljeffylarry My other favorite YouTube engineer just dropped some serious BILF porn

My other favorite YouTube engineer just dropped some serious BILF porn submitted by liljeffylarry to realcivilengineer [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 18:52 The_Dialog_Box This new test layout is absolutely rancid. Please god I'm begging you don't go through with it.

This new test layout is absolutely rancid. Please god I'm begging you don't go through with it. submitted by The_Dialog_Box to youtube [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 18:25 5DPrinciple The only thing this printer is making is me frustrated.

I've got this Ender 3 Pro and no matter how many times I try and fix it something else goes wrong.
It started with a feeding issue where the motor would 'tok' and not feed filament into the tube to the extruder. I changed out the extruder tip, ran a test? Nothing.
I examined the tube itself, thought I needed to switch it out because it it may be clogged, turns out I was wrong about that as the first time I ran it today it just dumped a shit ton of filament out onto the floor next to the extruder after the head didn't move at all.
So now I know the extruder or tube aren't clogged, which is great, but now when I try to run this level test print -nothing- gets put onto the print bed and the feeding wheel just rotates and doesn't actually feed any filament into the tube.
I am trying to not get so frustrated and just give up on the damned thing but this is fucking ridiculous.
When I try to change the z access in the menu it just takes me back to the base menu without letting me make any changes, it won't print this simple level test print in it's entirety no matter how many times I manually level the fucker, and now it's not feeding filament at all. Is this printer model just a piece of junk or am I doing something wrong?
Addition:
I can get it to print one of the pre-installed models but the Z-axis rises several mm before the filament begins to flow and lays loopy and useless filament bases. Did I fuck up programming somewhere?
submitted by 5DPrinciple to Ender3Pro [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 18:08 Crystalkeeper3333 Porn addiction/ betrayal trauma

Porn addiction/ betrayal trauma— I am (31F) and my fiancé (33M) we have been together for almost 11 years. he has had an ongoing “addiction” to porn, it absolutely devastates me. He’s such an amazing and attentive partner, I deal with panic disorder and he has always been my biggest supporter, my safe person. He’s an amazing dad to our boys one of which the oldest is not biologically his. He’s been in his life since he was two, he’s twelve now. But this… “addiction” is our biggest problem, his major downfall. And that’s what makes this so complicated for me, because yeah it’s easy to say “leave him” but there’s so much good involved too, and children mixed in and history, and he takes such good care of our family, but this problem is so hard for me to stomach. He says it has nothing to do with me, and that these are his demons that he’s been battling for years. I believe it, But it’s hard for me NOT to direct it at myself; I get so angry and say some of the most unforgivable things just to hurt him even half as much as this hurts me. It crushes my confidence, I’ve had 3 pregnancy the last one being twins that we lost at 24weeks gestation. It was tragic, and traumatic for us both. He held me together though it all. Which just thickens our bond because we really leaned on eachother though that experience & grieved together, I also deal with anxiety and panic disorder and he is my safe person he’s helped me through some of the scariest and darkest days, to points of staying up to watch me fall asleep for a period of time because I was obsessed and afraid I was going to stop breathing and die, or letting me be on the phone with him for hours in his headphones during episodes while he was at work because I would think I was going to pass out and die or have a headache and die. It sounds wild, but if you have or no some one with panic disorder it’s not that far fetched. He’s never once let me feel alone or like a burden in these moments. but I’m just so angry with him when he slips up here and there. We will have a few good weeks/ months then boom my intuition rings and I’ll find it. He did start seeing a therapist a while ago because it was either get help, or get out of my life and let me heal alone. He stopped seeing the first one after a while cause he didn’t feel like he clicked with him.. which i understood. Then of course another relapse, so he got a new one a few months later. We started recently doing the sessions together after one of the relapse (also because I wanted to make sure he’s not just bullshiting this therapist by saying he’s going good when he’s not )and it’s been really nice to have an outsider who is educated specifically on porn/ sex addiction but who can also call me out on my wrong doings along with call him out on his, but he’s still had a few slip ups. It’s not daily but id say every few weeks ( I know this because we have an open phone policy, he allows me to look through his phone at anytime no questions asked. We use screen time to tract his activity during the day while he’s at work because that’s when it happens most the time) it’s working so far.. but we had a another slip up yesterday literally him on YouTube trying to find transparent try on hauls… because he’s not to be on App Store , Google , safari while not home and that might sound crazy to some who don’t know what this is like, buts an agreement we made together. I just wish this nightmare would go away, I wish so much that I never felt this type of insecurity. The betrayal trauma. The resentment. I don’t fully know why I’m putting this out here, Maybe to find some one who relates? Find hope for recovery for him? Advice aside from just “leaving”? If you have something mean to say, please just move along my soul is tired.
submitted by Crystalkeeper3333 to HelpingPornAdiction [link] [comments]


2024.05.21 18:04 Crystalkeeper3333 Porn addiction/ betrayal trauma

Porn addiction/ betrayal trauma— I am (31F) and my fiancé (33M) we have been together for almost 11 years. he has had an ongoing “addiction” to porn, it absolutely devastates me. He’s such an amazing and attentive partner, I deal with panic disorder and he has always been my biggest supporter, my safe person. He’s an amazing dad to our boys one of which the oldest is not biologically his. He’s been in his life since he was two, he’s twelve now. But this… “addiction” is our biggest problem, his major downfall. And that’s what makes this so complicated for me, because yeah it’s easy to say “leave him” but there’s so much good involved too, and children mixed in and history, and he takes such good care of our family, but this problem is so hard for me to stomach. He says it has nothing to do with me, and that these are his demons that he’s been battling for years. I believe it, But it’s hard for me NOT to direct it at myself; I get so angry and say some of the most unforgivable things just to hurt him even half as much as this hurts me. It crushes my confidence, I’ve had 3 pregnancy the last one being twins that we lost at 24weeks gestation. It was tragic, and traumatic for us both. He held me together though it all. Which just thickens our bond because we really leaned on eachother though that experience & grieved together, I also deal with anxiety and panic disorder and he is my safe person he’s helped me through some of the scariest and darkest days, to points of staying up to watch me fall asleep for a period of time because I was obsessed and afraid I was going to stop breathing and die, or letting me be on the phone with him for hours in his headphones during episodes while he was at work because I would think I was going to pass out and die or have a headache and die. It sounds wild, but if you have or no some one with panic disorder it’s not that far fetched. He’s never once let me feel alone or like a burden in these moments. but I’m just so angry with him when he slips up here and there. We will have a few good weeks/ months then boom my intuition rings and I’ll find it. He did start seeing a therapist a while ago because it was either get help, or get out of my life and let me heal alone. He stopped seeing the first one after a while cause he didn’t feel like he clicked with him.. which i understood. Then of course another relapse, so he got a new one a few months later. We started recently doing the sessions together after one of the relapse (also because I wanted to make sure he’s not just bullshiting this therapist by saying he’s going good when he’s not )and it’s been really nice to have an outsider who is educated specifically on porn/ sex addiction but who can also call me out on my wrong doings along with call him out on his, but he’s still had a few slip ups. It’s not daily but id say every few weeks ( I know this because we have an open phone policy, he allows me to look through his phone at anytime no questions asked. We use screen time to tract his activity during the day while he’s at work because that’s when it happens most the time) it’s working so far.. but we had a another slip up yesterday literally him on YouTube trying to find transparent try on hauls… because he’s not to be on App Store , Google , safari while not home and that might sound crazy to some who don’t know what this is like, buts an agreement we made together. I just wish this nightmare would go away, I wish so much that I never felt this type of insecurity. The betrayal trauma. The resentment. I don’t fully know why I’m putting this out here, Maybe to find some one who relates? Find hope for recovery for him? Advice aside from just “leaving”? If you have something mean to say, please just move along my soul is tired.
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