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2014.11.20 00:25 JonasBrosSuck AnimalTextGifs = Cute Animals + Text + Gif
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2010.02.27 05:23 Meades_Loves_Memes r/teenagers
teenagers is the biggest community forum run by teenagers for teenagers. Our subreddit is primarily for discussions and memes that an average teenager would enjoy to discuss about. We do not have any age-restriction in place but do keep in mind this is targeted for users between the ages of 13 to 19. Parents, teachers, and the like are welcomed to participate and ask any questions!
2024.05.21 13:01 HeidiInWonderland The truth hurts. Who said the truth would set you free?
Written by both Heidi and Lita. Lita has to leave early for her internship so Heidi is posting this.
We had a very long, difficult, and important conversation with our mothers last night. We are posting this with their permission, hoping that it might help others like us.
It's hard for us to imagine any other 16-year-olds having a more wonderful year than we have had. How many people find their life partners at our young age? We trained our bodies, dove into our respective art forms, gained insight into our future careers, earned/saved a lot of money, made many friends, explored Buddhism, and joined two families into one.
But we were building a new family on a foundation of deceit and this is what had to change. Back to our conversation.
"We had led you to believe we met at school volleyball team practice back in September. We told you we discovered our soulmates and we were queer. From there we lived hard and well, became a family of six, and then everything else followed. We don't regret a second.
"We just left out one fact...we met and began our relationship one year earlier when we were in 9th grade. We had kept it secret from you. Sound familiar? It is like the story of Emma Nolan and Alyssa Greene in The Prom."
It is hard to describe the look in their eyes. We saw disbelief, shock, hurt, anger, and mostly a sense of betrayal.
Muma: How did you really meet?
Lita: Actually, we told you the story. In fact, we have been leaving clues all over the place kind of hoping we would be discovered.
Heidi: This goes back to September 2022. I was on the crosstown bus. I saw some boys get on. One stayed in the front and the others placed themselves in the aisle going down. The boy in the front grabbed a girl's phone and they passed it to each other. The boy at the end got the phone and walked out of the rear door. I had seen the entire thing and just followed him. He thought he had committed the perfect crime and I approached him. "I saw everything. I know your face, what you are wearing, and your sneakers. I know your friends. Give me the phone and I won't say a word." He did. I walked back to the bus and there was the girl with the bus driver and a couple of cops at the side of the bus. She was sobbing and they were trying to comfort her. I went up, told them what had happened, and gave her the phone back.
Mom: I remember the story. And you are saying that the girl you helped was Lita.
Muma: And the little heroine you told Pupa and me about was Heidi?
Lita: Yes. I was an absolute wreck, completely unconsolable. I felt violated and humiliated. The girl grabbed me by the arm and simply said "Come, let's sit down." She brought me to a cute ice cream restaurant she knew near Bloomingdale's. What's your favorite flavor? I said Plain Vanilla. What's yours? Chocolate. We looked at each other's skin and just had to laugh.
Heidi: I can't describe how I was feeling while we eating ice cream. Waves and waves and waves of emotions hit me.
Lita: All I could do was look Heidi in the eyes and hold her hand.
Mom: I remember that story very clearly.
Lita: We exchanged numbers and IG. Then came texts, calls, secret hookups, the first kiss, and the rest.
Heidi: It was like The King And I, "Hello Young Lovers."
Lita: It was High School Admissions time and I encouraged Heidi to audition for LaGuardia for the 10th grade.
Mom: So that was what that was all about?
Muma: But I don't understand why you felt a need to keep your relationship a secret for an entire year!
This was really the hardest part of the conversation. We talked about all the emotions we were experiencing. What, we are in love? We are lesbians? We are sneaking behind our parents' backs? We are watching lesbian porn and acting it out? What, I am with a black/white girl? All this shame at once and we couldn't figure a way out until Girls Volleyball. We even left some hints on this blog in case you read it.
Muma: What is most painful to me is that this was the time you needed your mothers the most and you went through the entire year all alone.
We are four strong woman. We were at a place far beyond "How dare you? This has to end. You are grounded. Scotland is off." There was thoughtful silence, long looks into each other's eyes, and then cuddling on the couch and watching The Good Doctor.
We all had the same thought. How are we going to tell Dad and Pupa?
submitted by HeidiInWonderland to LoHeidiLita [link] [comments]
We had a very long, difficult, and important conversation with our mothers last night. We are posting this with their permission, hoping that it might help others like us.
It's hard for us to imagine any other 16-year-olds having a more wonderful year than we have had. How many people find their life partners at our young age? We trained our bodies, dove into our respective art forms, gained insight into our future careers, earned/saved a lot of money, made many friends, explored Buddhism, and joined two families into one.
But we were building a new family on a foundation of deceit and this is what had to change. Back to our conversation.
"We had led you to believe we met at school volleyball team practice back in September. We told you we discovered our soulmates and we were queer. From there we lived hard and well, became a family of six, and then everything else followed. We don't regret a second.
"We just left out one fact...we met and began our relationship one year earlier when we were in 9th grade. We had kept it secret from you. Sound familiar? It is like the story of Emma Nolan and Alyssa Greene in The Prom."
It is hard to describe the look in their eyes. We saw disbelief, shock, hurt, anger, and mostly a sense of betrayal.
Muma: How did you really meet?
Lita: Actually, we told you the story. In fact, we have been leaving clues all over the place kind of hoping we would be discovered.
Heidi: This goes back to September 2022. I was on the crosstown bus. I saw some boys get on. One stayed in the front and the others placed themselves in the aisle going down. The boy in the front grabbed a girl's phone and they passed it to each other. The boy at the end got the phone and walked out of the rear door. I had seen the entire thing and just followed him. He thought he had committed the perfect crime and I approached him. "I saw everything. I know your face, what you are wearing, and your sneakers. I know your friends. Give me the phone and I won't say a word." He did. I walked back to the bus and there was the girl with the bus driver and a couple of cops at the side of the bus. She was sobbing and they were trying to comfort her. I went up, told them what had happened, and gave her the phone back.
Mom: I remember the story. And you are saying that the girl you helped was Lita.
Muma: And the little heroine you told Pupa and me about was Heidi?
Lita: Yes. I was an absolute wreck, completely unconsolable. I felt violated and humiliated. The girl grabbed me by the arm and simply said "Come, let's sit down." She brought me to a cute ice cream restaurant she knew near Bloomingdale's. What's your favorite flavor? I said Plain Vanilla. What's yours? Chocolate. We looked at each other's skin and just had to laugh.
Heidi: I can't describe how I was feeling while we eating ice cream. Waves and waves and waves of emotions hit me.
Lita: All I could do was look Heidi in the eyes and hold her hand.
Mom: I remember that story very clearly.
Lita: We exchanged numbers and IG. Then came texts, calls, secret hookups, the first kiss, and the rest.
Heidi: It was like The King And I, "Hello Young Lovers."
Lita: It was High School Admissions time and I encouraged Heidi to audition for LaGuardia for the 10th grade.
Mom: So that was what that was all about?
Muma: But I don't understand why you felt a need to keep your relationship a secret for an entire year!
This was really the hardest part of the conversation. We talked about all the emotions we were experiencing. What, we are in love? We are lesbians? We are sneaking behind our parents' backs? We are watching lesbian porn and acting it out? What, I am with a black/white girl? All this shame at once and we couldn't figure a way out until Girls Volleyball. We even left some hints on this blog in case you read it.
Muma: What is most painful to me is that this was the time you needed your mothers the most and you went through the entire year all alone.
We are four strong woman. We were at a place far beyond "How dare you? This has to end. You are grounded. Scotland is off." There was thoughtful silence, long looks into each other's eyes, and then cuddling on the couch and watching The Good Doctor.
We all had the same thought. How are we going to tell Dad and Pupa?
2024.05.21 10:57 No_Fish_296 I need help
tldr at bottom. My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without traffic, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since. I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted. I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore? tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.
submitted by No_Fish_296 to BreakUps [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 10:45 Dippycat149 EB Threatens Legal Action over an Antique Photograph
I never thought I would ever enter one of these "Entitled" subreddits with a story of my own before, but apparently, the fates have decreed otherwise, for last week, I too, was blessed to be in the presence of a Karen. An EB. A whackjob. Whatever you want to call her.
The lady in question is someone whom I shall refer to, going forward, as "Hyacinth", mostly because she acts a LOT like Hyacinth Bucket from the Britcom "Keeping up Appearances". For those familiar with the TV show, why she has earned this moniker will soon become painfully obvious.
To continue...
I met Hyacinth about a year ago. Some friends and I were setting up a public exhibition, and I had volunteered to be one of the tour-guides, to explain said-exhibition to potential museum visitors, and guide them through the photographs, antiques, and other things that made up our display. One day, a friend texted me if I was free that Friday to meet-and-greet a group of people who were coming to see the exhibit. I said "yes".
Among this group was Hyacinth.
I did not at the time have any inkling of how bad this would get.
Fast forward about six months, then.
In the short time I've known her, a few things have become painfully obvious about Hyacinth - she loves - LOVES - LOOOVES (did I say 'loves'?) to talk about her family, her relatives, who she's related to, how she's related to them, why, what they do, how much they earn, how much they're worth, who else she knows, who her friends are, what they do, how much they earn, and how much they're worth. The words "Millionaire" and "Billionaire" pop up so often, you'd think you were reading the Forbes List. And she would talk about them for AGES - what should be a five-minute phone-call would turn into a 30 minute lecture about how well-connected she is.
For the most part, she was generally civil. She invited me out to meals with her friends, she asked me to tell them about myself...always, again, for some reason, with heavy emphasis on family history and connections and occupations and jobs and stuff. By now I had accepted that she was just weird, and eccentric and whatever. Takes all types, as they say, and I assumed that was it.
Something to know about the two of us is that we're both members of a local club. This club is a cultural club, dedicated to the promotion and preservation of our shared ethnic heritage. There's the main club, and then there's the smaller youth-group within the main club. Said youth-group is run by a friend, and we have a FB group. In this group we share videos, recipes, photos of food, family, friends, events we went to, or hosted, or participated in, and occasionally, historical stuff related to our culture - photographs, antiques, family heirlooms, and such-like.
The reason for this post is because of what happened about a week ago - in this group.
I had written a FB post about similar such organisations as our club, and a bit about their history, how they had formed, why, and where at. For visual interest, I'd added a photograph into the post, which was of the first-ever such club, at its formation, which was WELL OVER 100 years ago (our club doesn't go back that far!!).
I posted it in one group on FB and then shared it into the youth-group's FB group as well, and just...left it.
In a matter of a couple of hours, Hyacinth was attacking me on FB.
Which members of this photograph are my ancestors? Which ones are my relatives? Which ones are my family?? I told her none of them are - it's a historical photo in the public domain, it was relevant to what I was writing, it was relevant to our group, I shared it. End of story.
No, not good enough.
She immediately demanded to know by what right I shared this photograph, whether I'd asked anybody's permission, and why I hadn't contacted the descendants of the people in the photograph - which is WELL OVER 100 years old - 120+, to give you an idea.
I told her I had no idea how to do that, even if I had the names. She got furious and demanded I contact these people (how??) and ask their permission, or she would, and get me sued. She was also FURIOUS that I dared to share the photo in another group, which wasn't about our club, or culture, or heritage - and that I have NO RIGHT to do so!!
I'm like - that's my damn FB group - you don't have any right to tell me what I can or can't share in my own group. You don't get to dictate to me how I use my social media account.
But no, not good enough. She went on a diatribe that lasted two days, and a messenger diatribe that lasted at least two hours. Now she's threatening to send emails and screenshots and whatever, because I dared to share a public domain photograph, to some people who she says are SUPER RICH and SUPER INFLUENTIAL and SHE KNOWS THEM and THEY'LL SUE ME!!
Anyway, I reported her to our group-admin, who is my friend, who reported her to the club committee, citing harassment of a member as the reason.
The committee is currently in conference about this (and other incidents) surrounding Hyacinth - to decide what to do with her, finally, at long-last. According to my friend, Hyacinth has made loads of enemies, has done nothing but complain, has made outrageous suggestions to the club, and has attacked at least 2 or 3 other members - my incident is just the most recent one IN THE LAST THREE MONTHS!!
I'm waiting on my friend to provide an update about this, and if necessary, for me to provide evidence of the encounter.
My friend was shocked that this happened - and frankly, so was I - that Hyacinth was this aggressive about something which is REALLY a non-issue. We both agreed that any friendship that existed between us and her, was now fully, and completely dissolved.
Hyacinth is not going to like that - as I said - she's all about bragging and connections and who she knows and how famous they are...she's not going to like this at all. Especially if they kick her out of the club.
submitted by Dippycat149 to EntitledBitch [link] [comments]
The lady in question is someone whom I shall refer to, going forward, as "Hyacinth", mostly because she acts a LOT like Hyacinth Bucket from the Britcom "Keeping up Appearances". For those familiar with the TV show, why she has earned this moniker will soon become painfully obvious.
To continue...
I met Hyacinth about a year ago. Some friends and I were setting up a public exhibition, and I had volunteered to be one of the tour-guides, to explain said-exhibition to potential museum visitors, and guide them through the photographs, antiques, and other things that made up our display. One day, a friend texted me if I was free that Friday to meet-and-greet a group of people who were coming to see the exhibit. I said "yes".
Among this group was Hyacinth.
I did not at the time have any inkling of how bad this would get.
Fast forward about six months, then.
In the short time I've known her, a few things have become painfully obvious about Hyacinth - she loves - LOVES - LOOOVES (did I say 'loves'?) to talk about her family, her relatives, who she's related to, how she's related to them, why, what they do, how much they earn, how much they're worth, who else she knows, who her friends are, what they do, how much they earn, and how much they're worth. The words "Millionaire" and "Billionaire" pop up so often, you'd think you were reading the Forbes List. And she would talk about them for AGES - what should be a five-minute phone-call would turn into a 30 minute lecture about how well-connected she is.
For the most part, she was generally civil. She invited me out to meals with her friends, she asked me to tell them about myself...always, again, for some reason, with heavy emphasis on family history and connections and occupations and jobs and stuff. By now I had accepted that she was just weird, and eccentric and whatever. Takes all types, as they say, and I assumed that was it.
Something to know about the two of us is that we're both members of a local club. This club is a cultural club, dedicated to the promotion and preservation of our shared ethnic heritage. There's the main club, and then there's the smaller youth-group within the main club. Said youth-group is run by a friend, and we have a FB group. In this group we share videos, recipes, photos of food, family, friends, events we went to, or hosted, or participated in, and occasionally, historical stuff related to our culture - photographs, antiques, family heirlooms, and such-like.
The reason for this post is because of what happened about a week ago - in this group.
I had written a FB post about similar such organisations as our club, and a bit about their history, how they had formed, why, and where at. For visual interest, I'd added a photograph into the post, which was of the first-ever such club, at its formation, which was WELL OVER 100 years ago (our club doesn't go back that far!!).
I posted it in one group on FB and then shared it into the youth-group's FB group as well, and just...left it.
In a matter of a couple of hours, Hyacinth was attacking me on FB.
Which members of this photograph are my ancestors? Which ones are my relatives? Which ones are my family?? I told her none of them are - it's a historical photo in the public domain, it was relevant to what I was writing, it was relevant to our group, I shared it. End of story.
No, not good enough.
She immediately demanded to know by what right I shared this photograph, whether I'd asked anybody's permission, and why I hadn't contacted the descendants of the people in the photograph - which is WELL OVER 100 years old - 120+, to give you an idea.
I told her I had no idea how to do that, even if I had the names. She got furious and demanded I contact these people (how??) and ask their permission, or she would, and get me sued. She was also FURIOUS that I dared to share the photo in another group, which wasn't about our club, or culture, or heritage - and that I have NO RIGHT to do so!!
I'm like - that's my damn FB group - you don't have any right to tell me what I can or can't share in my own group. You don't get to dictate to me how I use my social media account.
But no, not good enough. She went on a diatribe that lasted two days, and a messenger diatribe that lasted at least two hours. Now she's threatening to send emails and screenshots and whatever, because I dared to share a public domain photograph, to some people who she says are SUPER RICH and SUPER INFLUENTIAL and SHE KNOWS THEM and THEY'LL SUE ME!!
Anyway, I reported her to our group-admin, who is my friend, who reported her to the club committee, citing harassment of a member as the reason.
The committee is currently in conference about this (and other incidents) surrounding Hyacinth - to decide what to do with her, finally, at long-last. According to my friend, Hyacinth has made loads of enemies, has done nothing but complain, has made outrageous suggestions to the club, and has attacked at least 2 or 3 other members - my incident is just the most recent one IN THE LAST THREE MONTHS!!
I'm waiting on my friend to provide an update about this, and if necessary, for me to provide evidence of the encounter.
My friend was shocked that this happened - and frankly, so was I - that Hyacinth was this aggressive about something which is REALLY a non-issue. We both agreed that any friendship that existed between us and her, was now fully, and completely dissolved.
Hyacinth is not going to like that - as I said - she's all about bragging and connections and who she knows and how famous they are...she's not going to like this at all. Especially if they kick her out of the club.
2024.05.21 10:30 No_Fish_296 Am I in the wrong for missing my Ex after I broke up with to pursue another woman?
My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without trafique, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since. I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted. I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore? tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.
submitted by No_Fish_296 to amiwrong [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 09:54 No_Fish_296 How do I m20 stop being a selfish asshole to my f19 ex?
tldr at bottom.
My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without traffic, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since.
I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted.
I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore?
tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.
submitted by No_Fish_296 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without traffic, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since.
I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted.
I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore?
tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.
2024.05.21 05:22 Fluffy_fluffy_ Alternate ending updated • near the new part
/ Hayes’ pov /
When Solene’s large sable orbs locked on mine, time stopped, the past five years of pain fell away. Her supple rosy lips upturned and slightly parted- the same way they had before. The same lips I fell in love with. She was beautiful, the same stand out features and subtle curves.
It felt as if gravity was pulling me closer, each step unconscious. With our toes nearly touching, every nerve ending in my body urged me to touch her, to tuck a stray strand of hair away.
“Hi.” Her voice velvety and deep, slightly hoarse.
Unsure of what to say I began to speak, “H- wh- how are you?” The future of whatever could be depended on the next few moments, and I didn’t even know where to begin.
Solene felt the same way, it was evident in her tone, “I’m well, not much has changed, I’m slightly older…” she let out a weak laugh “and Izzy is a sophomore in college. He-“.
“That’s gre-“ I began. “Sorry you go ahead.” I could feel my cheeks pinken.
“I was just going to ask if you’d like to sit and chat, I have time before my client arrives and it would be nice to talk.” Her tone was unreadable, I’d hoped she’d wanted me to say yes.
With a nod of my head, she turned on her heels; her now chin length hair fanning out slightly.
————————————————————————————— Once we reach the offices, Tracy peeks her head out of her office and smirks “Ah hello Adonis.” The comment although to me is more geared toward Solene.
“Tracy, don’t you have some art to purchase or someone else’s awkward moment to make worse.” Solene rolls her eyes, the same mischievous sparkle apparent.
With a small smile, I duck into Solene’s office. Taking in the familiar-small- space, I smile, not much has changed. Photographs of Izzy through out the years, multiple paintings from artists all over the world, and even a few of us during the time we spent together on August Moon’s tour adorn her walls.
Leaving the door open slightly Solene sits on the small love seat she added to the room, its vintage, it suits her.
Taking a seat next to her I smile. She seems to be taking me in, inspecting closely how age and life have affected me. “How are you? I saw you on Jimmy Kimmel last week, are you enjoying the solo route?”.
“It’s been a journey of loss and gain. I didn’t know that with love comes pain, until that day five years ago. The music I’ve been writing is not just about infatuation but yearning for what was.” I realize I may be rambling and pause.
“It’s nice to see you passionate about music again, the same way it was when it was just you and your guitar.” Solene’s hand touches mine tenderly, “tell me more about it?”.
“Well, when we went our separate ways I began to see the road ahead was going to be the same as before if I let it. I could keep on as the British boy who messes about and lets everyone around him make decisions for him; or I could be who I am today. I’m finally involved in the process of my music from start to fi-“ a knock on the door brings me to a stop.
“Solene, Ms. Raphel is here. I know she’s a half an hour early, would you like me to tell her you’re in meeting?” Tracy looks pained as if she’s interrupted a super secret meeting- which she has, but it’s not the end of the world.
Solene’s eyes bounce between mine and Tracy’s “Fucking artists. They’re never on time, it’s always absurdly early or laughably late.”
Deciding for the both of us I stand up, “This is important Sol, I’ll be here as long as it takes. As long as your number is still the same, I would be more than happy to schedule something.” Tracy shuts the door slowly and leaves us alone again.
“Hayes, are you sure? I can tell her I’m in a meeting, I can’t expect you to move your busy schedule around because of my client’s inability to tell time.” Solene stands and begins shuffling papers on her desk, no matter what she says I know I’ll go to the ends of the earth for her.
Standing behind her I place my hand on her shoulder “I’ll be available whenever you are. Good luck with the new client.” I walk to the door before turning back “Oh and Solene, you’re still hot or whatever.” With those parting words I open the door leaving her blinking in shock. ————————————————————————————— As I sit on the sofa of my new flat, I’m like a teen boy again. Do I dare flirt with the girl? Keep it simple? I begin typing something only to delete it until I hit send on impulse.
-Hayes- I was wondering if you’d like to get some really fucking good sandwiches sometime? —————————————————————————————
It’s been two hours since I left the gallery, fifteen since I sent the text, and five minutes since Solene has read it. Patience and tranquility are two things I am fresh out of when it comes to waiting.
-Hayes- I know you’ve read it Sol, it’ll be just lunch.
This time she replies immediately
-Solene- I don’t know Hayes… it was always just lunch.
-Hayes- I’ll behave, or try to. Pls?
Knowing she won’t be able to say no, I prematurely do a little dance.
-Solene- I’ll think about it, maybe.
-Hayes- Go easy on my poor heart Sol. One sandwich. Not even drinks. Just bread. Yes?
At this point I may as well be on my knees, she still knows how to make me work for it.
Leaving well enough alone, I decide to go for a run. The waterside park in Santa Barbara has become my refuge-aside from my music- the waves and fresh, cool air keep me grounded.
————————————————————————————— After running for an hour I look at my messages to see a simple victory but a victory nonetheless.
-Solene- Fine you win. Lunch. I could go for a good sandwich.
• A wide toothy grin spreads across my face as I stare at the message. I almost forget I’m standing in the middle of the walking path when someone clears their throat, “Are you Hayes Campbell?”. The person- a woman who appears to be in her thirties- asks me. “I saw you on Kimmel, and I must say that you’re talented as hell. I cried when I heard your new song. Can I get a picture?”.
It isn’t as often as it used to be, but I do get recognized by fans when I’m out and about. I’m currently covered in a thin sheen of sweat and quite a mess, but I wouldn’t be me if I said no. Nodding my head I allow her to get closer and pose with a peace sign. She takes two photos before stepping back. My phone dings twice before she can speak.
-Solene- Does 12 tomorrow work for you? I have nothing scheduled for tomorrow.
The woman looks over at my screen which I’m stupidly, openly looking at. “Is that ‘the’ Solene? Oh my gosh! Everyone’s going to go crazy when they find out.” She seems to have forgotten composure.
“Ah it was nice to meet you, have a good day.” I mutter out briefly before jogging away. This is just absolutely fucking great, here’s to hoping there’s a divine being who will save my arse. ———————————————————————————
Once I reach my apartment I’m exhausted and my mind is filled with all the worst case scenarios that will result from my stupidity.
-Hayes- Sure. Does my new flat work? I’d love to make you a sandwich, return the favor or whatever.
(To be continued)
submitted by Fluffy_fluffy_ to primetheideaofyou [link] [comments]
When Solene’s large sable orbs locked on mine, time stopped, the past five years of pain fell away. Her supple rosy lips upturned and slightly parted- the same way they had before. The same lips I fell in love with. She was beautiful, the same stand out features and subtle curves.
It felt as if gravity was pulling me closer, each step unconscious. With our toes nearly touching, every nerve ending in my body urged me to touch her, to tuck a stray strand of hair away.
“Hi.” Her voice velvety and deep, slightly hoarse.
Unsure of what to say I began to speak, “H- wh- how are you?” The future of whatever could be depended on the next few moments, and I didn’t even know where to begin.
Solene felt the same way, it was evident in her tone, “I’m well, not much has changed, I’m slightly older…” she let out a weak laugh “and Izzy is a sophomore in college. He-“.
“That’s gre-“ I began. “Sorry you go ahead.” I could feel my cheeks pinken.
“I was just going to ask if you’d like to sit and chat, I have time before my client arrives and it would be nice to talk.” Her tone was unreadable, I’d hoped she’d wanted me to say yes.
With a nod of my head, she turned on her heels; her now chin length hair fanning out slightly.
————————————————————————————— Once we reach the offices, Tracy peeks her head out of her office and smirks “Ah hello Adonis.” The comment although to me is more geared toward Solene.
“Tracy, don’t you have some art to purchase or someone else’s awkward moment to make worse.” Solene rolls her eyes, the same mischievous sparkle apparent.
With a small smile, I duck into Solene’s office. Taking in the familiar-small- space, I smile, not much has changed. Photographs of Izzy through out the years, multiple paintings from artists all over the world, and even a few of us during the time we spent together on August Moon’s tour adorn her walls.
Leaving the door open slightly Solene sits on the small love seat she added to the room, its vintage, it suits her.
Taking a seat next to her I smile. She seems to be taking me in, inspecting closely how age and life have affected me. “How are you? I saw you on Jimmy Kimmel last week, are you enjoying the solo route?”.
“It’s been a journey of loss and gain. I didn’t know that with love comes pain, until that day five years ago. The music I’ve been writing is not just about infatuation but yearning for what was.” I realize I may be rambling and pause.
“It’s nice to see you passionate about music again, the same way it was when it was just you and your guitar.” Solene’s hand touches mine tenderly, “tell me more about it?”.
“Well, when we went our separate ways I began to see the road ahead was going to be the same as before if I let it. I could keep on as the British boy who messes about and lets everyone around him make decisions for him; or I could be who I am today. I’m finally involved in the process of my music from start to fi-“ a knock on the door brings me to a stop.
“Solene, Ms. Raphel is here. I know she’s a half an hour early, would you like me to tell her you’re in meeting?” Tracy looks pained as if she’s interrupted a super secret meeting- which she has, but it’s not the end of the world.
Solene’s eyes bounce between mine and Tracy’s “Fucking artists. They’re never on time, it’s always absurdly early or laughably late.”
Deciding for the both of us I stand up, “This is important Sol, I’ll be here as long as it takes. As long as your number is still the same, I would be more than happy to schedule something.” Tracy shuts the door slowly and leaves us alone again.
“Hayes, are you sure? I can tell her I’m in a meeting, I can’t expect you to move your busy schedule around because of my client’s inability to tell time.” Solene stands and begins shuffling papers on her desk, no matter what she says I know I’ll go to the ends of the earth for her.
Standing behind her I place my hand on her shoulder “I’ll be available whenever you are. Good luck with the new client.” I walk to the door before turning back “Oh and Solene, you’re still hot or whatever.” With those parting words I open the door leaving her blinking in shock. ————————————————————————————— As I sit on the sofa of my new flat, I’m like a teen boy again. Do I dare flirt with the girl? Keep it simple? I begin typing something only to delete it until I hit send on impulse.
-Hayes- I was wondering if you’d like to get some really fucking good sandwiches sometime? —————————————————————————————
It’s been two hours since I left the gallery, fifteen since I sent the text, and five minutes since Solene has read it. Patience and tranquility are two things I am fresh out of when it comes to waiting.
-Hayes- I know you’ve read it Sol, it’ll be just lunch.
This time she replies immediately
-Solene- I don’t know Hayes… it was always just lunch.
-Hayes- I’ll behave, or try to. Pls?
Knowing she won’t be able to say no, I prematurely do a little dance.
-Solene- I’ll think about it, maybe.
-Hayes- Go easy on my poor heart Sol. One sandwich. Not even drinks. Just bread. Yes?
At this point I may as well be on my knees, she still knows how to make me work for it.
Leaving well enough alone, I decide to go for a run. The waterside park in Santa Barbara has become my refuge-aside from my music- the waves and fresh, cool air keep me grounded.
————————————————————————————— After running for an hour I look at my messages to see a simple victory but a victory nonetheless.
-Solene- Fine you win. Lunch. I could go for a good sandwich.
• A wide toothy grin spreads across my face as I stare at the message. I almost forget I’m standing in the middle of the walking path when someone clears their throat, “Are you Hayes Campbell?”. The person- a woman who appears to be in her thirties- asks me. “I saw you on Kimmel, and I must say that you’re talented as hell. I cried when I heard your new song. Can I get a picture?”.
It isn’t as often as it used to be, but I do get recognized by fans when I’m out and about. I’m currently covered in a thin sheen of sweat and quite a mess, but I wouldn’t be me if I said no. Nodding my head I allow her to get closer and pose with a peace sign. She takes two photos before stepping back. My phone dings twice before she can speak.
-Solene- Does 12 tomorrow work for you? I have nothing scheduled for tomorrow.
The woman looks over at my screen which I’m stupidly, openly looking at. “Is that ‘the’ Solene? Oh my gosh! Everyone’s going to go crazy when they find out.” She seems to have forgotten composure.
“Ah it was nice to meet you, have a good day.” I mutter out briefly before jogging away. This is just absolutely fucking great, here’s to hoping there’s a divine being who will save my arse. ———————————————————————————
Once I reach my apartment I’m exhausted and my mind is filled with all the worst case scenarios that will result from my stupidity.
-Hayes- Sure. Does my new flat work? I’d love to make you a sandwich, return the favor or whatever.
(To be continued)
2024.05.21 05:21 AahenL I sooo needed a fidget spinner today!
I have really bad anxiety. This past weekend, my " not friend" volunteered to take me to the appointment for a physical evaluation for my disability review. She got me there more than an hour early. My appointment was at 4pm. She picked me up a little after 2pm. After we stopped so her brother could put air in the tire, then again for gas, we arrived at my appointment at about 10 minutes till 3pm. She stayed in the car. At 3:30 she started texting me asking how much longer it would be. I told her we were there and hour early (she hates it when ppl show up at her office early because she already has appointments scheduled). She said she had been hoping they would see me early. Others were there for their appointments and some were arriving for times that were before mine. She was getting more and more antsy. 4pm came and went. By 4:30, she was berating me in text for not knowing how long it would take. She was telling me that she.was a good friend cause she.would not even be waiting for her own family. I had no backup plan to get home, but at 4:49, I told her to go home. Then I started making calls. I don't have any friends. My contacts were former co-workers and family of a former client. All the numbers either went to voicemail or were no longer in service. I then called my former clients's dad. He told me to call him after I had been seen and he would come.and get me. I broke down crying. By the time I got to see the Dr, I was an emotional mess. He came.qnd got me, but made it clear that I could not call him again. (His daughter died several months ago, and I was a reminder of that). After I got home, I texted my friend to tell her I was home.and OK. She never responded. This morning when I walked into the office where I am her unpaid assistant, who works more than 50 hours a week in her office, she was already there. Before I could say anything, she jumped onto me telling me how entitled I am to expect her to wait in a hot car. How I was ungrateful. How I had the attitude of "white privilege". Everytime I opened my mouth to speak, she would telle not to dare part my mouth, that she was still speaking. This torment went on for over an hour, only stopping when someone came into the office and starting back up when they left. I was wearing star shaped dangle earrings. I took the big star and pushed it into the skin behind my ear so hard that it started to bleed. I needed that pain to focus on to keep from crying. When I felt the blood, I started on the other ear. This is why I felt I needed a fidget spinner. Something to focus on. I have always been the physical or emotional punching bag to someone. I hate myself for letting people do this to me. I will never accept a ride from her again unless it is to go to the other property to work in that office as well.
Before any one tells me to end this toxic relationship, I am trapped. She is my landlord. I have worked in her offices for 9 years. I have seen how vindictive she can be. I have seen how retaliatory she can be. I can't afford to be evicted.
submitted by AahenL to Vent [link] [comments]
Before any one tells me to end this toxic relationship, I am trapped. She is my landlord. I have worked in her offices for 9 years. I have seen how vindictive she can be. I have seen how retaliatory she can be. I can't afford to be evicted.
2024.05.21 03:30 PleasantTransition77 We Don’t Know How to Proceed
Our host, Bee has gone dormant, and I, Vee, am fronting currently and I’m so angry and so are the others. We spent the last week watching Bee try so hard to be okay, to focus on healing, and letting go of anger and practicing radical acceptance and all that healthy healing bullshit. Meanwhile, they’re doing with they’re two “best friends” who I don’t even know if I would call actual friends let along best friends. We’ve watched for the last week as Bee tried so fucking hard to do their best to be a good friend, while also being in one of the worst weeks of their life due to their dad’s death anniversary. While Bee was alone for the entire day, trying to be okay, their two best friends were at K, one of the friend’s house, drinking and watching YouTube and posting snaps of it.
Bee also tends to isolate when they don’t feel okay, it’s the only way they know how to cope. They basically just shut down, ignoring all texts and shit like that until they feel able to handle it. K is now basically giving us the silent treatment because they think Bee ignored him when they didn’t, they just couldn’t fucking handle him with their own shit. And when K isn’t ignoring us, they respond in short, one word answers, clearly fucking upset and making it everyone else’s problem rather than just fucking communicating like the twenty-fucking-three college graduate they are.
Bee used to go to M, the other friend, for emotional support when they felt like they couldn’t handle it anymore. However, over the last week, M has blatantly ignored them multiple times, left them on read for hours, and barely talks to them. Bee hasn’t been able to ask them for help despite needing it this last week because K has a habit of going thru others people’s devices and gets pissy if Bee dares to open up to M, but not him. So, Bee has spent the worst week of their life with no fucking outside support because of fucking K.
I just want to rage. I want to destroy K. I want to tell him exactly how bad he hurt Bee, to the point that Bee has gone dormant because if they didn’t, they couldn’t guarantee our safety anymore. I’ve watched Bee cry and breakdown over this shit multiple times this week and I hate it. I’m suppose to be a fucking protector and I couldn’t do anything. Even know, I haven’t said anything to either of those people because I know Bee wouldn’t want them hurt because their a sacrificial peace keeping idiot at times.
This came across a lot more ranting than I intended. I’m also aware I sound cruel, but I can’t bring myself to care right now. I’ve spent the last week watching my head headmate suffer until they just completely went dormant because of these people. What do we do right now? We’re just so angry and hurt and our head feels like a war zone.
submitted by PleasantTransition77 to DID [link] [comments]
Bee also tends to isolate when they don’t feel okay, it’s the only way they know how to cope. They basically just shut down, ignoring all texts and shit like that until they feel able to handle it. K is now basically giving us the silent treatment because they think Bee ignored him when they didn’t, they just couldn’t fucking handle him with their own shit. And when K isn’t ignoring us, they respond in short, one word answers, clearly fucking upset and making it everyone else’s problem rather than just fucking communicating like the twenty-fucking-three college graduate they are.
Bee used to go to M, the other friend, for emotional support when they felt like they couldn’t handle it anymore. However, over the last week, M has blatantly ignored them multiple times, left them on read for hours, and barely talks to them. Bee hasn’t been able to ask them for help despite needing it this last week because K has a habit of going thru others people’s devices and gets pissy if Bee dares to open up to M, but not him. So, Bee has spent the worst week of their life with no fucking outside support because of fucking K.
I just want to rage. I want to destroy K. I want to tell him exactly how bad he hurt Bee, to the point that Bee has gone dormant because if they didn’t, they couldn’t guarantee our safety anymore. I’ve watched Bee cry and breakdown over this shit multiple times this week and I hate it. I’m suppose to be a fucking protector and I couldn’t do anything. Even know, I haven’t said anything to either of those people because I know Bee wouldn’t want them hurt because their a sacrificial peace keeping idiot at times.
This came across a lot more ranting than I intended. I’m also aware I sound cruel, but I can’t bring myself to care right now. I’ve spent the last week watching my head headmate suffer until they just completely went dormant because of these people. What do we do right now? We’re just so angry and hurt and our head feels like a war zone.
2024.05.21 02:19 itsgettinglateorwhat Are abusers abusive in all their relationships?
My ex partner was verbally and emotionally abusive, controlling, paranoid and jealous, would gaslight me, forget and deny, silent treatment for days, absolute horrible anger management issues with me and a lot of other people, breaking up at every argument, calling me names in front of his friends and never had a great display of self-awareness.
Before me he had two other girlfriends. The first one he dated for four years. He told me that they had an awesome relationship but he was never truly in love with her. She broke up with him but they remained friends.
The second one lasted for six months and he fell head over heels for her. But he said she cheated and always tried to make him jealous on purpose and that she didn’t have much regard for him. I don’t deny that’s not true but I knew the girl too and her version of events was different like she said they dated only for two months officially but I do think she wasn’t that attracted to him.
I was the first partner he had he was actually in love with and I was in love in return. We dated four years. There were some red flags at first but when we became official the relationship was fantastic for some good ten months until I found out he hid something from me and things went downhill from there. He started to yell at me out of the blue, bang things, get randomly angry, gaslight me, would get jealous if a guy would even look my way. The cherry on top was that he was massively addicted to porn and his consumption included some extreme stuff.
So he was good friends with his ex of four years and he wanted us to get along so one time I went out with her to the beach. She later invited me to have a drink and forgot my phone charging at her apartment. We used to send good night texts and I forgot so my called her and she handed me her phone with a strange face. He was so pissed I forgot to tell him where I was and that I was having a drink. He started accusing me and how dare I going out and drink and party - it was just a drink and it was not a wild party, there were kids and families - and hung up angry on me so I had to go home upset.
His ex girlfriend was so confused. She told me he had never gotten that way with her, that sort of jealous. I’d asume he had never been abusive either then.
While I did get a decent amount of attention and I did wear tight dresses when going out I had always behaved myself - never flirted - always let people know I had a partner. I mean I was massively in love with him and was not interested in anyone else. I had to remind him many many times that I wasn’t like his other ex that I was my own person and that I had always been loyal and acted like it.
But I still wonder if I did anything to trigger his abusive behaviour and his jealousy. Do some abusers only abusive a certain type of people? I’m pretty sure he dated someone very quick after me and have been dating for almost ten years.
submitted by itsgettinglateorwhat to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]
Before me he had two other girlfriends. The first one he dated for four years. He told me that they had an awesome relationship but he was never truly in love with her. She broke up with him but they remained friends.
The second one lasted for six months and he fell head over heels for her. But he said she cheated and always tried to make him jealous on purpose and that she didn’t have much regard for him. I don’t deny that’s not true but I knew the girl too and her version of events was different like she said they dated only for two months officially but I do think she wasn’t that attracted to him.
I was the first partner he had he was actually in love with and I was in love in return. We dated four years. There were some red flags at first but when we became official the relationship was fantastic for some good ten months until I found out he hid something from me and things went downhill from there. He started to yell at me out of the blue, bang things, get randomly angry, gaslight me, would get jealous if a guy would even look my way. The cherry on top was that he was massively addicted to porn and his consumption included some extreme stuff.
So he was good friends with his ex of four years and he wanted us to get along so one time I went out with her to the beach. She later invited me to have a drink and forgot my phone charging at her apartment. We used to send good night texts and I forgot so my called her and she handed me her phone with a strange face. He was so pissed I forgot to tell him where I was and that I was having a drink. He started accusing me and how dare I going out and drink and party - it was just a drink and it was not a wild party, there were kids and families - and hung up angry on me so I had to go home upset.
His ex girlfriend was so confused. She told me he had never gotten that way with her, that sort of jealous. I’d asume he had never been abusive either then.
While I did get a decent amount of attention and I did wear tight dresses when going out I had always behaved myself - never flirted - always let people know I had a partner. I mean I was massively in love with him and was not interested in anyone else. I had to remind him many many times that I wasn’t like his other ex that I was my own person and that I had always been loyal and acted like it.
But I still wonder if I did anything to trigger his abusive behaviour and his jealousy. Do some abusers only abusive a certain type of people? I’m pretty sure he dated someone very quick after me and have been dating for almost ten years.
2024.05.21 01:58 Ikusen_kiyoshi AITA for not wanting to take my Nephew-In-Law's GF to a theme park?
Nephew-In-Law (Joe 22) Nephew-In-Law's GF (Rose21) [Not real names for anyone]
I 29 (F) have been with my BF 33 (M) for almost 3 years now. His family has been so welcoming and loving to me. For context my bf, his sister, and his nephew (we shall call him Joe) all share the birthday month of May. This year I wanted to take them to a theme park that my bf loves to go and his sister and his niece and nephew have expressed they have been wanting to go, just so we can to celebrate together, including his niece because I love her dearly.
As I was going over the plans with a friend she asked " Are going to take Joe's GF (Rose) ?" I looked at her confused because I have honestly not thought about taking her since I only wanted to include family. I understand that she part of my extended extended family, but Rose and I rarely talk to each other. We could be in the same room with no else there and we still wont engage with one another. Not saying that I haven't tried, but sometimes I get the feeling she doesn't like me or I'm a bother to her. I still try to keep it civil with her during family events though.
My friend called me an A-hole for not even considering of taking Rose. I told her that I didn't consider her because Rose has mentioned before that she doesn't like going to theme parks because of all the walking and she cant get on most rides since they are not fluffy friendly and she is a fluffier girl. I didn't want to change the theme park just for her, but I also don't want to buy her a ticket for her not to have a good time, complain, ruin the trip or make us leave early.
After speaking with my friend, I reached out to Rose asking if she would like to go on this trip to the theme with us but she would have to pay for her own ticket because I am paying for my bf and his family. She expressed to me is a very rude and with colorful language that how dare I not consider her family since she has been with Joe since they were both 18, so about 5 years now and had been part of the family longer than I have. She threatened to tell Joe about the plan if I didn't buy her a ticket . I told her I don't respond to threats and hung up. Rose has been blowing up my phone with text messages calling me an A-hole, then within a minute or two apologizing. But I didn't reply. So again within a minute or two she texted me again telling me that I'm a selfish person, and I'm just using my bf to get to Joe and blah blah blah. Right after she texted me that, she apologized again.
She hasn't contacted me since but so I feel like I am being a bit of an A-hole just for this reason but I also feel its justified since I'm paying for everything out of my pocket.
In the back of my head I feel like she only apologized and hasn't contact me because she wants me to buy her ticket.
So I ask AITA ??????
submitted by Ikusen_kiyoshi to CharlotteDobreYouTube [link] [comments]
I 29 (F) have been with my BF 33 (M) for almost 3 years now. His family has been so welcoming and loving to me. For context my bf, his sister, and his nephew (we shall call him Joe) all share the birthday month of May. This year I wanted to take them to a theme park that my bf loves to go and his sister and his niece and nephew have expressed they have been wanting to go, just so we can to celebrate together, including his niece because I love her dearly.
As I was going over the plans with a friend she asked " Are going to take Joe's GF (Rose) ?" I looked at her confused because I have honestly not thought about taking her since I only wanted to include family. I understand that she part of my extended extended family, but Rose and I rarely talk to each other. We could be in the same room with no else there and we still wont engage with one another. Not saying that I haven't tried, but sometimes I get the feeling she doesn't like me or I'm a bother to her. I still try to keep it civil with her during family events though.
My friend called me an A-hole for not even considering of taking Rose. I told her that I didn't consider her because Rose has mentioned before that she doesn't like going to theme parks because of all the walking and she cant get on most rides since they are not fluffy friendly and she is a fluffier girl. I didn't want to change the theme park just for her, but I also don't want to buy her a ticket for her not to have a good time, complain, ruin the trip or make us leave early.
After speaking with my friend, I reached out to Rose asking if she would like to go on this trip to the theme with us but she would have to pay for her own ticket because I am paying for my bf and his family. She expressed to me is a very rude and with colorful language that how dare I not consider her family since she has been with Joe since they were both 18, so about 5 years now and had been part of the family longer than I have. She threatened to tell Joe about the plan if I didn't buy her a ticket . I told her I don't respond to threats and hung up. Rose has been blowing up my phone with text messages calling me an A-hole, then within a minute or two apologizing. But I didn't reply. So again within a minute or two she texted me again telling me that I'm a selfish person, and I'm just using my bf to get to Joe and blah blah blah. Right after she texted me that, she apologized again.
She hasn't contacted me since but so I feel like I am being a bit of an A-hole just for this reason but I also feel its justified since I'm paying for everything out of my pocket.
In the back of my head I feel like she only apologized and hasn't contact me because she wants me to buy her ticket.
So I ask AITA ??????
2024.05.21 01:04 Salty-Judge-9144 AITA: Left my boyfriend at the gas station
I (f34) picked my boyfriend (m40) up from work on Saturday and he immediately was pressing me asking if something was up. I was fine and was listening to a buddhist podcast so I chuckled and told him I was fine. Then, someone cut me off on an on-ramp with multiple filter lanes and I said woah that was stupid, hopefully he doesn't end up wrapped around a lamp post - at this point my husband said 'you are being weird, pull over at the gas station' which is his code for wanting to buy booze. I said ok. He said and you can drop me off at home I don't want you around tonight. I said ok, can you give me gas money? I am broke and the gas to drive to your house and back is a lot... He started making a huge deal that I dared to ask him for gas money because he apparently gave me gas money several weeks ago. It is a 20 mile minimum round trip for me to do this and I do it multiple times a week. At this point I was like 'why are you picking a fight, is it because you want to drink alone? I don't need to come to your house so don't use it as a punishment'. He got angry right away and said I am an adult and can drink what I want. I don't give a F***. I don't give a F*** about what you think.
At this point my flight response got activated, he got out of the car and I said, fine make your own way home.
I drove off.
He texted me and said he would break up with me unless I immediately came and picked him up.
I went back and asked if he would let me in his house if I took him home, he laughed and called me a name and asked me to give him his food, so i threw it out of the passenger window at him. Then he started kicking my car and threw his food at it. I drove off. We had a heated exchange in messenger, where I told him to pay for an uber, he said he has friends and family and doesn't need me or uber, and now he has blocked me and told me it's over.
AITA??
submitted by Salty-Judge-9144 to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
At this point my flight response got activated, he got out of the car and I said, fine make your own way home.
I drove off.
He texted me and said he would break up with me unless I immediately came and picked him up.
I went back and asked if he would let me in his house if I took him home, he laughed and called me a name and asked me to give him his food, so i threw it out of the passenger window at him. Then he started kicking my car and threw his food at it. I drove off. We had a heated exchange in messenger, where I told him to pay for an uber, he said he has friends and family and doesn't need me or uber, and now he has blocked me and told me it's over.
AITA??
2024.05.20 23:43 XCanuck My marriage feels strained and very one-sided, unsure how to cope with a wife who won't communicate or share responsibilities
There's a "dad joke" I heard that goes: My therapist told me to write out a big long rant letter to everyone I have a problem with, burn them all to ashes, and scatter the ashes into the wind. I did all that last weekend, but now I'm not sure what to do with the letters.
This post feels like that big, long rant, but I genuinely could really use some help/ideas beyond "go to marriage counseling." I provide so much to the family and household that isn't reciprocated, but trying to set boundaries to feel more balanced gets passive-aggressive and/or silent treatment. I'm not writing all this here just to vent, I've actually edited this down pretty significantly to summarize what I'm going through and giving some examples.
Thanks for giving me the space to share this.
Me (50/M), Wife (45/F), two kids 15 and 13. We have no family who live anywhere close to us. We're in the middle of America, her divorced parents are on the coast, and mine's in Canada where I'm originally from (in case my username didn't give that away).
TLDR at the bottom.
Trigger warnings: a ruined birthday, shared/not-shared finances, me losing my cool and walking out on my family and getting the silent treatment since, and apparently being the only parent/grown-up in the house.
To this family, I feel that all I am to them is the income/paycheck and personal chef, and I'm ready to walk away. My wife won't communicate, gets defensive and angry, and doesn't contribute to the marriage or teach our kids about responsibility, so I look like a jerk all the time. If I speak up and ask her to help, I'm treated like a jerk. If I don't speak up, she does nothing.
Background about physicality, work and finances
I work in tech, typically 50-70 hours per week, and take on occasional (< 5 hrs/week) contract work as a side business to pay for my 3D printing hobby that I'm also trying to turn into a side business. She works part-time maybe one full day of work throughout the week on an as-needed basis.
My job pays the benefits, and I've established a retirement fund for us, plus a 401K and Roth IRA, plus a 529 account for each of the kids that I've been investing in since they were born. I paid off both cars. We're debt-free except for our mortgage, and we have enough assets to pay off the house if we choose to.
We each have a bank account for ourselves, plus a joint bank account. Her part-time paychecks and other money from an inheritance, goes 100% into her account only, and I use my account for my 3D printing business to maintain an LLC. Just about everything financial is paid for from my paychecks. I've always treated this as "our" money. All bills, mortgage, memberships, subscriptions (Netflix, etc), things the kids need (clothing, shoes, school supplies, etc), furniture, medical bills, etc are all paid from a joint account that is funded 100% by my paycheck. She makes no contributions to this account, but she does withdraw from it for fast food, snacks she buys just for herself, her own crafting hobbies, and she'll pick up maybe $100/month for some groceries.
I promised her before we were even married that if she wanted to be a stay-at-home mom or, at any point, go back to work, she'd have my full support either way, and I've kept that promise. She worked full-time for about 2 years before we had kids and worked a fair bit of part-time work before the kids started school in 2013. She's been at her part-time job for 2 years, so quite a span where she didn't work at all.
She works as a 1099 contractor and, despite repeatedly being asked to, won't reserve money for tax time. So, not only does she spend 100% of her paycheck, but I have to be sure that we save enough to cover her tax bill every year. She's never offered to contribute to tax payments we have to make.
I had gallbladder surgery and bariatric surgery, so I've had pretty restrictive dietary needs for the past 5-6 years. She often made comments about me being heavy and having a shortened life span, but since my bariatric surgery, she's expressed resentment about my body changing (I lost 120+lbs) and now doesn't care to learn what kinds of protein/carb/fat balance I need, and gained about 80lbs herself. As such, she does not contribute to any meal planning, which means I'm doing 95% of all meal planning, groceries, and cooking.
When it comes to cooking, I'm a damn good cook, and it's 100% because of YouTube. She grew up in an environment where she wasn't encouraged to cook or even learn to, so she lived on PBJ through college until we started dating and I would cook or take her out. When the kids were in their "picky" stages of 4yrs-9yrs of age, she got frustrated with cooking but years later still holds to that "NOBODY likes what I cook". So she makes maybe 2 or 3 meals per month now, and it's always the same meals. Last night, she cooked 10 people's worth of macaroni with a single pound of ground beef and more than a pound of cheese. I had to pick out the meat to get my protein and then drink a protein shake afterward, and then got offended that I threw away the noodles/cheese. (My diet needs high protein, low carbs, and almost no fat, she knows this because I tell her quite often, but she won't do anything about it; she's bought maybe 3 shelves worth of cookbooks and won't even open them or go take a class or anything.)
Our oldest kid has shown an interest in cooking and will maybe cook one meal per week and ask me to help him out, so I share what I've learned, things I've tried, experimented with, lessons learned, etc., and we have a good time, and they really appreciate the learning opportunity. On the rare occasion I do see my wife making dinner in the kitchen, I show her that I'm really happy about what she's making and ask if she wants help chopping or anything and I only get "no" as an answer and completely shut down like I'm not supposed to be in the kitchen. I'll try to have conversation with her but then she can't concentrate on cooking, chopping, etc, and then "ruined" dinner is my fault.
"Her" money versus "our" money, and how we spend our days/weekends
My wife had a relative die quite a few years ago and in the fall of 2018 was given a $250k inheritance. She has always referred to this as "her" money, "her" retirement, in case "she" needs a nursing home later. I'm not in her future plans, apparently. She gave $50k of it to a cousin who was deliberately left out of that relative's will. My wife's will leaves any remaining inheritance money to the kids. No mention of me anywhere whatsoever.
Once the inheritance money hit her bank account, she decides to buy a horse from halfway across the country and put it in a boarding stable 20 minutes from the house. It was a childhood dream of hers. Apparently, she's allowed to pursue her dreams and interests, it's "her" money, I'm not allowed to tell her what to do with it, but she complains when my 3D printing business makes enough money to buy another printer to keep up with demand... And my hobby takes up less time per week than she spends at the barn.
When she's not working her one-day-a-week job, she's at the boarding stable for a few hours per day, playing with her horse, taking selfies, taking him on walks, not actually riding him. With her remaining time at home, and when she gets home with the kids, she's lying on the couch, acting worn out and tired like she just bench-pressed the friggin' horse. (And yes, I know horse training CAN be exhausting, but she's not doing anything exhausting with him. She literally walks him on a path, or walks him in circles in an arena enclosure, or she's brushing him down and bathing him to look nice for Instagram)
In the summer of 2018, right before she got this inheritance money, she spent $50k of "our" money on a kitchen renovation that she insisted she designs herself, and then felt guilty about the bill and me having to take on more side contracting work to pay off the HELOC in a reasonable amount of time, and contributed back $10k to the whole project from "her" money afterward. "Her" money paid for the kids' orthodontics, about $3k each. But she literally contributes NOTHING else financially to the family.
If I had to guess, she's got about $150k left of that inheritance money, maybe less, she won't ever tell me about it. And we don't get a notice from the bank about interest gained at tax time every year because she put it in an account that makes ZERO interest. She sees my investments with 25%-40% gains, but won't ever ask for my help or input. Instead, she asked 3 other guys at work who told her to at least get a Vanguard account, but almost 6 years later she's never done it.
I work full-time as mentioned, and work from home. Work is typically 50+ hours per week but I try to cap it at 60-ish if I can. For the past month I've been on a project with a tight deadline, and working more like 10-14 hours per day 6 days per week. It's like that in tech, she's been understanding of this in the past, and I'm sure to take jobs where this is NOT the norm. Still, I'm always happy to help drive the kids to/from school or to music lessons or doctors, but I'm usually treated like "how dare you," that's "her" job, like that's her contribution to everything.
She works a part-time job doing marketing. Maybe 2-3 hours a day, one or two days per week. Sometimes busier in Q1 as they prep/plan most of the year, but then very low-lift afterward. She spends maybe 40 minutes per day taking the kids to/from school. Other than that, she's at the barn or on the couch. (have I mentioned we've gone through several couches that "our" money pays for??)
The marital imbalance I'm dealing with
She won't enforce chores for the kids, remind them to do laundry, or clean their rooms, or even shower. She'll text me "one of the boys smells" after taking them to school, but won't insist they shower, or back me up on the whole "c'mon guys, brush twice a day at least, and shower at least every 2 days with actual some soap on your bodies and actual shampoo on your hair, and use deodorant..." She'll make remarks like "Didn't you wear and sleep in those clothes for the past 3 days?" but won't make them change, or tell them to do their laundry.
She might do dishes 2 to 3 times per month, it's normally a chore we give to the kids, but she never enforces it. If they stack up for 3 days she'll do some of them but not all of them. One kid was born on an odd-numbered day, the other on an even-numbered day, so the rule is if today is an even or odd day, we know whose turn it is to do the dishes. And if the month has an odd number of days, I do the dishes on the 31st/29th day. But they're teenagers, they'd rather be in their rooms being teenagers, so I have to constantly remind them. Neither of them checks that the dishes are even clean before putting them away, something she specifically called out being embarrassed about when we were dating and visiting her mom's house where half of the dishes in the cupboard still had dried food all over them.
And then garbage day, or yard work, or vacuuming, cleaning a bathroom, cleaning their room, shoveling snow. She doesn't help enforce ANY of the chores that we agreed on. So I'm the sole disciplinarian around here, which makes the kids grow up thinking they better avoid me or I'm the jerk who's gonna put them to work.
Nothing happens around here unless I ask the rest of the family. I've purposefully left chores undone for "that's almost a health hazard" amounts of time and still nobody takes the initiative, nor will she ask the kids to help. They all see the work needs to be done, but they won't choose to help, and they're probably learning from her example of just sitting in some other room/area of the house and someone else will do it someday.
Even asking them "what kind of meals do you want this week, what haven't we had in a while, what's your favorite meal," you'd swear I was asking them to cure cancer every Saturday so I could start to plan meals for the following week and get groceries on Sunday, which has been our routine since the kids could talk.
Their cop-out is to skip the 3 shelves of cookbooks and flip through a binder we kept from a few months of Hello Fresh meals but then it's the same 10-12 meals that get kinda old after a while.
I feel like I have no help from anyone.
I reached my tipping point, and recently walked out on my family
A little over three weeks ago, I'm on this tight deadline at work, getting maybe 3-4 hours of sleep at night, pulling 10-14 hour days. It's a Wednesday, I remember about 430pm that I should commit my code, as I usually do 'cause I need to make dinner because nobody else is gonna do it. Oh, wait, tonight was grilled cheese and tomato soup -- literally, ANYONE ELSE in the house, including our 13yr old who has never shown any interest in cooking, could heat a can of soup and melt cheese between bread, right??? Surely SOMOENE else in the family will handle dinner, so I keep working (note, without asking anyone else to help with dinner), hoping someone else will handle the meal. (and yes, I know this is typically against my diet, but I indulge in this low-protein, high-carb, higher-fat meal about once a month.)
At 730pm my wife comes STOMPING into my office area, "I can't make the grilled cheese like you do." No politeness, just turns and stomps back to the kitchen. I follow her to the kitchen, where the tomato soup is on a RAPID boil, yet she hasn't even started making the grilled cheese sandwiches. I turn the soup off, take it off the burner, and start to describe what to do for the grilled cheese. It's honestly nothing special; I put shredded cheese in the pan to get crusty on the outside of the bread, then stack up the the grilled cheese, put break on top, let the inner cheese melt, and flip it onto more shredded cheese. Highly recommended.
She says "Oh" and ... LEAVES THE KITCHEN, leaving me there expecting me to make dinner... and I'm pissed. I should have just gone back to my work area, but she parks herself back on the couch.
I get everything made, and of course nobody sets the table, ever. Now I'm seriously pissed off, so I slam some dishes in the middle of the table and go back into the kitchen to get the pot of soup and plate of sandwiches. I get back to the dinner table, where my wife and youngest are just standing there, STILL not setting the table despite me standing there with food that I can't even put down. So I drop the food on the table wherever I can, soup splashes everywhere, and I start setting the table while they stand there and watch and ... I lost my cool. I flung bowls and spoons in the general area where they're supposed to be at the table, and I walked out of the house. I returned 4 or 5 hours later once they were all in bed.
The ONE meal in my busy schedule that ANY of them could have made, and her contribution was putting a can of soup in a pot.
She still didn't make any meals for the rest of the week. That Sunday she put a meal plan together for the whole following week. Again, all super carb-heavy when she knows my own diet can't handle that. And then she stopped planning ANYTHING ELSE SINCE THEN. The following week's "meal plan" was just a list of who was home on which night because of end-of-school-year events going on. No meals, no grocery list. Meanwhile I'm still on my deadline... Last week, no help at all. This week, zero help.
So this week's meal plan I finally set a boundary for myself that was VERY clear to them: I'm planning to cook 3 meals for the whole week, Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and left the rest open with no meal planned. Last night at 6pm she made her "hamburger helper" and plans "ramen" for tomorrow (again, all noodles and broth, very little protein), but no other help from her for the rest of the meal plan for the remainder of the week.
My recently ruined 50th birthday
My birthday was a little over a week ago. I turned 50. Send me your favorite dad jokes, please, I beg of you.
My wife asked me 2 or 3 months ago if I wanted any kind of party, etc. to which I said yeah, I'd love to have a few friends over, named several of them, all of whom she either has in her phone, or are guys married to women that I know she stays in regular contact with. I mentioned some all-you-can-eat places that we could go, just the 4 of us, where I could pick out good proteins etc. and they could eat whatever they wanted.
I got nothing. No dinner out. No party. No friends.
The night before my birthday, she was too lazy to get off the couch, so I went to bed alone. I woke up in bed alone. I told the family the day before that I wanted French Toast for breakfast, normally something we'd do on Christmas Day, but it was my 50th birthday gosh darn it, and I was even thawing bacon. I even bought all the groceries needed. Nope, had to cook that alone too, so I only made enough for me, and ate alone. Showered alone, 'cause we haven't been intimate in ... 3 months? 4 months? And who cares that it's my birthday.
Nobody asked if I wanted to go out anywhere, go see a movie, go for a hike with the dog, nothing. So I went out with the dog, alone.
That night I had to make dinner for the family, again, on my own friggin' birthday. Alone in the kitchen. AND I had to remind the kids to clean up the kitchen afterward 'cause they won't do it unless they're told. She bought tiny pieces of cheesecake for dessert, which she knows I don't like and can't eat because of my diet. I had one tiny piece, she and the kids ate the rest.
No cake, no candle, no balloons. It was my FIFTIETH birthday ...
We have some serious communication breakdown going on
Since I walked out of the house a few weeks back, she only talks to me when she wants something, and that comes across more as a demand, "I need you to pick the kids up from school, I have to be at work" and walks away She won't say good morning or even hi, unless I say it first. Lately, I say "hi" or "hey" as we're passing in the house and I get no response at all. I get literal one-word responses when I ask her a question. A few nights ago, several nights in a row, I'm in the living room on my laptop trying to get more work done, she'll come in the room, not ask me what I'm doing or if I'm working, and blast a TV show on her phone at near-maximum volume, and fall asleep on the couch.
She gets mad and offended any time I offer constructive criticism of any kind. And it doesn't matter how delicately I try to phrase things, I'll agonize for days over exactly which words to use, she'll get super defensive, angry and lash out, and give me the silent treatment for weeks.
Last Tuesday was an end-of-year awards show for our youngest, who's finishing 8th grade. He's really into music and he stayed after school to practice for the event. She comes home to get ready then decides to leave for the event by herself. I only noticed when the garage opened and closed. She doesn't say anything to me or our oldest kid about what time she wanted to leave or if we're ready to go, she just ... left. Well of COURSE we both want to go, but now we have to drive there separately. And he wins a TON of awards, one from his classmates, one from his teacher, and one from the school. I'd have been PISSED to have missed that. "Oh, I thought you didn't want to go..." was her reason later.
This past Saturday, I do ALL the yardwork 'cause she won't tell the kids to help and I'm frankly tired of having to ask for help. A few hours of yard work later, I tell my youngest to vacuum 'cause nobody vacuums around here unless I tell them to and honestly it's gross. I hop in the shower to clean up and cool down from the yard work. Youngest decides it's "too hot in the house" and sits in the kitchen to eat a popsicle instead of vacuuming. No backup from my wife at all on this, who's still parked on the couch. So I get upset with him, he does a half-assed job, says he's "tired' (from watching YouTube all day) and goes back to his room and we don't see him again the rest of the day. Again, no help or backup from my wife.
It's now 7pm in the house Saturday night, and -- shocker -- NOBODY has bothered to even ASK about dinner much less put any kind of food together. 8pm rolls around and my oldest finally emerges from his own room, starts thawing some chicken, and comes to ask me for help to make a meal, which I happily do. Until I get grumbly comments about "why are we eating so late." And my wife makes her way back to the couch. Not so much as a "thanks for cooking" or offer to clean up. And of COURSE nobody is doing the dishes, because DAD didn't remind anyone.
WHAT DO I DO??
19 years ago when we got married, this felt like a marriage. We did stuff together, we split things evenly, shared responsibility and chores, we both cooked, we bought groceries together. The first few years with kids were rough, but it at least FELT like a partnership once we figured out how to be parents. But something has shifted over the past decade, and this feels less and less like a partnership, much less feeling like a marriage. This whole relationship feels very one-sided, I get no appreciation for any of my constant hard work and being a provider. Instead, she's accused me, twice, of having an affair, once to the point of giving me anxiety/panic attacks for which I was almost hospitalized.
Now, she and the kids are noticing and talking behind my back (like I can't hear them) about the fact that I'm not wearing my wedding band anymore. Of course, the kids won't ask me directly, and I'm not bringing it up myself, and my wife's not talking to me anyway. Maybe she's still mad that I got mad a few weeks ago and walked out? Hard to know when the person won't talk to you unless they want something from you.
I'll put the damn ring back on when it feels like a marriage again. But then the next time it comes off, I think it'll stay off.
TL;DR! To this family, I feel that all I am to them is the income/paycheck and personal chef, and I'm ready to walk away. I can see why parents stay together "for the kids." As with most marriages, it started great; we've had bumpy times, but we always got through it together. Nothing like this, though. My wife won't communicate, gets defensive and angry, and doesn't contribute to the marriage or teach our kids about responsibility, so I look like a jerk all the time. Something has shifted over the past decade, and this feels less and less like a partnership. This whole relationship feels very one-sided, I get no appreciation for any of my constant hard work and being a provider.
submitted by XCanuck to relationships [link] [comments]
This post feels like that big, long rant, but I genuinely could really use some help/ideas beyond "go to marriage counseling." I provide so much to the family and household that isn't reciprocated, but trying to set boundaries to feel more balanced gets passive-aggressive and/or silent treatment. I'm not writing all this here just to vent, I've actually edited this down pretty significantly to summarize what I'm going through and giving some examples.
Thanks for giving me the space to share this.
Me (50/M), Wife (45/F), two kids 15 and 13. We have no family who live anywhere close to us. We're in the middle of America, her divorced parents are on the coast, and mine's in Canada where I'm originally from (in case my username didn't give that away).
TLDR at the bottom.
To this family, I feel that all I am to them is the income/paycheck and personal chef, and I'm ready to walk away. My wife won't communicate, gets defensive and angry, and doesn't contribute to the marriage or teach our kids about responsibility, so I look like a jerk all the time. If I speak up and ask her to help, I'm treated like a jerk. If I don't speak up, she does nothing.
I work in tech, typically 50-70 hours per week, and take on occasional (< 5 hrs/week) contract work as a side business to pay for my 3D printing hobby that I'm also trying to turn into a side business. She works part-time maybe one full day of work throughout the week on an as-needed basis.
My job pays the benefits, and I've established a retirement fund for us, plus a 401K and Roth IRA, plus a 529 account for each of the kids that I've been investing in since they were born. I paid off both cars. We're debt-free except for our mortgage, and we have enough assets to pay off the house if we choose to.
We each have a bank account for ourselves, plus a joint bank account. Her part-time paychecks and other money from an inheritance, goes 100% into her account only, and I use my account for my 3D printing business to maintain an LLC. Just about everything financial is paid for from my paychecks. I've always treated this as "our" money. All bills, mortgage, memberships, subscriptions (Netflix, etc), things the kids need (clothing, shoes, school supplies, etc), furniture, medical bills, etc are all paid from a joint account that is funded 100% by my paycheck. She makes no contributions to this account, but she does withdraw from it for fast food, snacks she buys just for herself, her own crafting hobbies, and she'll pick up maybe $100/month for some groceries.
I promised her before we were even married that if she wanted to be a stay-at-home mom or, at any point, go back to work, she'd have my full support either way, and I've kept that promise. She worked full-time for about 2 years before we had kids and worked a fair bit of part-time work before the kids started school in 2013. She's been at her part-time job for 2 years, so quite a span where she didn't work at all.
She works as a 1099 contractor and, despite repeatedly being asked to, won't reserve money for tax time. So, not only does she spend 100% of her paycheck, but I have to be sure that we save enough to cover her tax bill every year. She's never offered to contribute to tax payments we have to make.
I had gallbladder surgery and bariatric surgery, so I've had pretty restrictive dietary needs for the past 5-6 years. She often made comments about me being heavy and having a shortened life span, but since my bariatric surgery, she's expressed resentment about my body changing (I lost 120+lbs) and now doesn't care to learn what kinds of protein/carb/fat balance I need, and gained about 80lbs herself. As such, she does not contribute to any meal planning, which means I'm doing 95% of all meal planning, groceries, and cooking.
When it comes to cooking, I'm a damn good cook, and it's 100% because of YouTube. She grew up in an environment where she wasn't encouraged to cook or even learn to, so she lived on PBJ through college until we started dating and I would cook or take her out. When the kids were in their "picky" stages of 4yrs-9yrs of age, she got frustrated with cooking but years later still holds to that "NOBODY likes what I cook". So she makes maybe 2 or 3 meals per month now, and it's always the same meals. Last night, she cooked 10 people's worth of macaroni with a single pound of ground beef and more than a pound of cheese. I had to pick out the meat to get my protein and then drink a protein shake afterward, and then got offended that I threw away the noodles/cheese. (My diet needs high protein, low carbs, and almost no fat, she knows this because I tell her quite often, but she won't do anything about it; she's bought maybe 3 shelves worth of cookbooks and won't even open them or go take a class or anything.)
Our oldest kid has shown an interest in cooking and will maybe cook one meal per week and ask me to help him out, so I share what I've learned, things I've tried, experimented with, lessons learned, etc., and we have a good time, and they really appreciate the learning opportunity. On the rare occasion I do see my wife making dinner in the kitchen, I show her that I'm really happy about what she's making and ask if she wants help chopping or anything and I only get "no" as an answer and completely shut down like I'm not supposed to be in the kitchen. I'll try to have conversation with her but then she can't concentrate on cooking, chopping, etc, and then "ruined" dinner is my fault.
My wife had a relative die quite a few years ago and in the fall of 2018 was given a $250k inheritance. She has always referred to this as "her" money, "her" retirement, in case "she" needs a nursing home later. I'm not in her future plans, apparently. She gave $50k of it to a cousin who was deliberately left out of that relative's will. My wife's will leaves any remaining inheritance money to the kids. No mention of me anywhere whatsoever.
Once the inheritance money hit her bank account, she decides to buy a horse from halfway across the country and put it in a boarding stable 20 minutes from the house. It was a childhood dream of hers. Apparently, she's allowed to pursue her dreams and interests, it's "her" money, I'm not allowed to tell her what to do with it, but she complains when my 3D printing business makes enough money to buy another printer to keep up with demand... And my hobby takes up less time per week than she spends at the barn.
When she's not working her one-day-a-week job, she's at the boarding stable for a few hours per day, playing with her horse, taking selfies, taking him on walks, not actually riding him. With her remaining time at home, and when she gets home with the kids, she's lying on the couch, acting worn out and tired like she just bench-pressed the friggin' horse. (And yes, I know horse training CAN be exhausting, but she's not doing anything exhausting with him. She literally walks him on a path, or walks him in circles in an arena enclosure, or she's brushing him down and bathing him to look nice for Instagram)
In the summer of 2018, right before she got this inheritance money, she spent $50k of "our" money on a kitchen renovation that she insisted she designs herself, and then felt guilty about the bill and me having to take on more side contracting work to pay off the HELOC in a reasonable amount of time, and contributed back $10k to the whole project from "her" money afterward. "Her" money paid for the kids' orthodontics, about $3k each. But she literally contributes NOTHING else financially to the family.
If I had to guess, she's got about $150k left of that inheritance money, maybe less, she won't ever tell me about it. And we don't get a notice from the bank about interest gained at tax time every year because she put it in an account that makes ZERO interest. She sees my investments with 25%-40% gains, but won't ever ask for my help or input. Instead, she asked 3 other guys at work who told her to at least get a Vanguard account, but almost 6 years later she's never done it.
I work full-time as mentioned, and work from home. Work is typically 50+ hours per week but I try to cap it at 60-ish if I can. For the past month I've been on a project with a tight deadline, and working more like 10-14 hours per day 6 days per week. It's like that in tech, she's been understanding of this in the past, and I'm sure to take jobs where this is NOT the norm. Still, I'm always happy to help drive the kids to/from school or to music lessons or doctors, but I'm usually treated like "how dare you," that's "her" job, like that's her contribution to everything.
She works a part-time job doing marketing. Maybe 2-3 hours a day, one or two days per week. Sometimes busier in Q1 as they prep/plan most of the year, but then very low-lift afterward. She spends maybe 40 minutes per day taking the kids to/from school. Other than that, she's at the barn or on the couch. (have I mentioned we've gone through several couches that "our" money pays for??)
She won't enforce chores for the kids, remind them to do laundry, or clean their rooms, or even shower. She'll text me "one of the boys smells" after taking them to school, but won't insist they shower, or back me up on the whole "c'mon guys, brush twice a day at least, and shower at least every 2 days with actual some soap on your bodies and actual shampoo on your hair, and use deodorant..." She'll make remarks like "Didn't you wear and sleep in those clothes for the past 3 days?" but won't make them change, or tell them to do their laundry.
She might do dishes 2 to 3 times per month, it's normally a chore we give to the kids, but she never enforces it. If they stack up for 3 days she'll do some of them but not all of them. One kid was born on an odd-numbered day, the other on an even-numbered day, so the rule is if today is an even or odd day, we know whose turn it is to do the dishes. And if the month has an odd number of days, I do the dishes on the 31st/29th day. But they're teenagers, they'd rather be in their rooms being teenagers, so I have to constantly remind them. Neither of them checks that the dishes are even clean before putting them away, something she specifically called out being embarrassed about when we were dating and visiting her mom's house where half of the dishes in the cupboard still had dried food all over them.
And then garbage day, or yard work, or vacuuming, cleaning a bathroom, cleaning their room, shoveling snow. She doesn't help enforce ANY of the chores that we agreed on. So I'm the sole disciplinarian around here, which makes the kids grow up thinking they better avoid me or I'm the jerk who's gonna put them to work.
Nothing happens around here unless I ask the rest of the family. I've purposefully left chores undone for "that's almost a health hazard" amounts of time and still nobody takes the initiative, nor will she ask the kids to help. They all see the work needs to be done, but they won't choose to help, and they're probably learning from her example of just sitting in some other room/area of the house and someone else will do it someday.
Even asking them "what kind of meals do you want this week, what haven't we had in a while, what's your favorite meal," you'd swear I was asking them to cure cancer every Saturday so I could start to plan meals for the following week and get groceries on Sunday, which has been our routine since the kids could talk.
Their cop-out is to skip the 3 shelves of cookbooks and flip through a binder we kept from a few months of Hello Fresh meals but then it's the same 10-12 meals that get kinda old after a while.
I feel like I have no help from anyone.
A little over three weeks ago, I'm on this tight deadline at work, getting maybe 3-4 hours of sleep at night, pulling 10-14 hour days. It's a Wednesday, I remember about 430pm that I should commit my code, as I usually do 'cause I need to make dinner because nobody else is gonna do it. Oh, wait, tonight was grilled cheese and tomato soup -- literally, ANYONE ELSE in the house, including our 13yr old who has never shown any interest in cooking, could heat a can of soup and melt cheese between bread, right??? Surely SOMOENE else in the family will handle dinner, so I keep working (note, without asking anyone else to help with dinner), hoping someone else will handle the meal. (and yes, I know this is typically against my diet, but I indulge in this low-protein, high-carb, higher-fat meal about once a month.)
At 730pm my wife comes STOMPING into my office area, "I can't make the grilled cheese like you do." No politeness, just turns and stomps back to the kitchen. I follow her to the kitchen, where the tomato soup is on a RAPID boil, yet she hasn't even started making the grilled cheese sandwiches. I turn the soup off, take it off the burner, and start to describe what to do for the grilled cheese. It's honestly nothing special; I put shredded cheese in the pan to get crusty on the outside of the bread, then stack up the the grilled cheese, put break on top, let the inner cheese melt, and flip it onto more shredded cheese. Highly recommended.
She says "Oh" and ... LEAVES THE KITCHEN, leaving me there expecting me to make dinner... and I'm pissed. I should have just gone back to my work area, but she parks herself back on the couch.
I get everything made, and of course nobody sets the table, ever. Now I'm seriously pissed off, so I slam some dishes in the middle of the table and go back into the kitchen to get the pot of soup and plate of sandwiches. I get back to the dinner table, where my wife and youngest are just standing there, STILL not setting the table despite me standing there with food that I can't even put down. So I drop the food on the table wherever I can, soup splashes everywhere, and I start setting the table while they stand there and watch and ... I lost my cool. I flung bowls and spoons in the general area where they're supposed to be at the table, and I walked out of the house. I returned 4 or 5 hours later once they were all in bed.
The ONE meal in my busy schedule that ANY of them could have made, and her contribution was putting a can of soup in a pot.
She still didn't make any meals for the rest of the week. That Sunday she put a meal plan together for the whole following week. Again, all super carb-heavy when she knows my own diet can't handle that. And then she stopped planning ANYTHING ELSE SINCE THEN. The following week's "meal plan" was just a list of who was home on which night because of end-of-school-year events going on. No meals, no grocery list. Meanwhile I'm still on my deadline... Last week, no help at all. This week, zero help.
So this week's meal plan I finally set a boundary for myself that was VERY clear to them: I'm planning to cook 3 meals for the whole week, Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and left the rest open with no meal planned. Last night at 6pm she made her "hamburger helper" and plans "ramen" for tomorrow (again, all noodles and broth, very little protein), but no other help from her for the rest of the meal plan for the remainder of the week.
My birthday was a little over a week ago. I turned 50. Send me your favorite dad jokes, please, I beg of you.
My wife asked me 2 or 3 months ago if I wanted any kind of party, etc. to which I said yeah, I'd love to have a few friends over, named several of them, all of whom she either has in her phone, or are guys married to women that I know she stays in regular contact with. I mentioned some all-you-can-eat places that we could go, just the 4 of us, where I could pick out good proteins etc. and they could eat whatever they wanted.
I got nothing. No dinner out. No party. No friends.
The night before my birthday, she was too lazy to get off the couch, so I went to bed alone. I woke up in bed alone. I told the family the day before that I wanted French Toast for breakfast, normally something we'd do on Christmas Day, but it was my 50th birthday gosh darn it, and I was even thawing bacon. I even bought all the groceries needed. Nope, had to cook that alone too, so I only made enough for me, and ate alone. Showered alone, 'cause we haven't been intimate in ... 3 months? 4 months? And who cares that it's my birthday.
Nobody asked if I wanted to go out anywhere, go see a movie, go for a hike with the dog, nothing. So I went out with the dog, alone.
That night I had to make dinner for the family, again, on my own friggin' birthday. Alone in the kitchen. AND I had to remind the kids to clean up the kitchen afterward 'cause they won't do it unless they're told. She bought tiny pieces of cheesecake for dessert, which she knows I don't like and can't eat because of my diet. I had one tiny piece, she and the kids ate the rest.
No cake, no candle, no balloons. It was my FIFTIETH birthday ...
Since I walked out of the house a few weeks back, she only talks to me when she wants something, and that comes across more as a demand, "I need you to pick the kids up from school, I have to be at work" and walks away She won't say good morning or even hi, unless I say it first. Lately, I say "hi" or "hey" as we're passing in the house and I get no response at all. I get literal one-word responses when I ask her a question. A few nights ago, several nights in a row, I'm in the living room on my laptop trying to get more work done, she'll come in the room, not ask me what I'm doing or if I'm working, and blast a TV show on her phone at near-maximum volume, and fall asleep on the couch.
She gets mad and offended any time I offer constructive criticism of any kind. And it doesn't matter how delicately I try to phrase things, I'll agonize for days over exactly which words to use, she'll get super defensive, angry and lash out, and give me the silent treatment for weeks.
Last Tuesday was an end-of-year awards show for our youngest, who's finishing 8th grade. He's really into music and he stayed after school to practice for the event. She comes home to get ready then decides to leave for the event by herself. I only noticed when the garage opened and closed. She doesn't say anything to me or our oldest kid about what time she wanted to leave or if we're ready to go, she just ... left. Well of COURSE we both want to go, but now we have to drive there separately. And he wins a TON of awards, one from his classmates, one from his teacher, and one from the school. I'd have been PISSED to have missed that. "Oh, I thought you didn't want to go..." was her reason later.
This past Saturday, I do ALL the yardwork 'cause she won't tell the kids to help and I'm frankly tired of having to ask for help. A few hours of yard work later, I tell my youngest to vacuum 'cause nobody vacuums around here unless I tell them to and honestly it's gross. I hop in the shower to clean up and cool down from the yard work. Youngest decides it's "too hot in the house" and sits in the kitchen to eat a popsicle instead of vacuuming. No backup from my wife at all on this, who's still parked on the couch. So I get upset with him, he does a half-assed job, says he's "tired' (from watching YouTube all day) and goes back to his room and we don't see him again the rest of the day. Again, no help or backup from my wife.
It's now 7pm in the house Saturday night, and -- shocker -- NOBODY has bothered to even ASK about dinner much less put any kind of food together. 8pm rolls around and my oldest finally emerges from his own room, starts thawing some chicken, and comes to ask me for help to make a meal, which I happily do. Until I get grumbly comments about "why are we eating so late." And my wife makes her way back to the couch. Not so much as a "thanks for cooking" or offer to clean up. And of COURSE nobody is doing the dishes, because DAD didn't remind anyone.
19 years ago when we got married, this felt like a marriage. We did stuff together, we split things evenly, shared responsibility and chores, we both cooked, we bought groceries together. The first few years with kids were rough, but it at least FELT like a partnership once we figured out how to be parents. But something has shifted over the past decade, and this feels less and less like a partnership, much less feeling like a marriage. This whole relationship feels very one-sided, I get no appreciation for any of my constant hard work and being a provider. Instead, she's accused me, twice, of having an affair, once to the point of giving me anxiety/panic attacks for which I was almost hospitalized.
Now, she and the kids are noticing and talking behind my back (like I can't hear them) about the fact that I'm not wearing my wedding band anymore. Of course, the kids won't ask me directly, and I'm not bringing it up myself, and my wife's not talking to me anyway. Maybe she's still mad that I got mad a few weeks ago and walked out? Hard to know when the person won't talk to you unless they want something from you.
I'll put the damn ring back on when it feels like a marriage again. But then the next time it comes off, I think it'll stay off.
2024.05.20 21:57 jtreddit702 AIW for tricking friend into going to an intervention?
I have a friend, lets call her Liz who I'm very close with and I've become a good family friend as well, getting to know her parents, siblings, cousins and nieces and nephews. I also met one cousin, Elisa (using fake names again) and got to know her. However, unknown to me, Elisa, has been on many people's bad side as she has borrowed money from various family members for almost a year now.
Liz has told me how Elisa borrowed $500 from her that she never paid back as well as over $5000 in total from friends, family and other acquaintances. She says that Elisa is irresponsible with money and has gotten into debt despite her Instagram showing her going on trips to Las Vegas and even out of the country. I'm also told that Elisa ignores or straight up blocks people or even family that keeps asking if she'll ever pay them back.
About 2 weeks ago, Elisa hits me up randomly asking if I can loan her $1000 as she claims to have given her mom emergency funds for surgery. She promises to pay me back but I said I'd have to think about it. She also asks for it in cash, which raises my red flags. I tell Liz about this and she knows Elisa is just lying as her mom is well and walking around with no issues. Liz then asks for a favor, she asks me to play along and trick Elisa into going with me on some trip but in reality, take her to her family's house so they can all confront her. I don't feel comfortable about this though but Liz begs me and says Elisa won't answer anyone's call or text and she needs to be put on blast.
Remembering how an ex once scammed money out of me, I decide to go along and ask Elisa that I'd loan her the money but if she could be my guest on a brunch trip I was having. I tell her it's with my "wealthy friend" who owns a private yacht. Elisa jumps at the chance and I pick her up at her apartment and drive her to Liz's brothers house (Elisa doesn't know where Liz's brother lives) and we go inside. There, Elisa finds about 12 of her extended family and they all start yelling and asking where their money is at. Elisa looks shocked and confused. Elisa starts yelling at me.
"You tricked me. You said we were going to your friend's house!" Elisa yells. Liz jumps in.
"You leave him out of this! This is between you and all of us!" Liz yells. The yelling and arguing continues as Elisa tries to leave but her older uncle stops her and tells her she needs to figure this out. Elisa is in tears at one point. Liz's brother comes up to me at one point.
"Sorry to get you involved bro. Don't feel bad. She had this coming to her." he says. He goes on to say I can leave so I do. Later that evening, Elisa texts me.
'FUCK YOU ASSHOLE. HOW DARE YOU LIE TO ME. I WAS WILLING TO GO HAVE BRUNCH WITH YOU AND INSTEAD, YOU LEFT ME WITH MY CRAZY ASS FAMILY AND THEIR JUDGEMENTAL ASSES."
I go on to explain what I know about her "borrowing" money from everyone.
"I DON'T NEED MONEY. I DEFINETLY DONT NEED YOURS. EVEN IF I TOOK SOME OF THEIR MONEY, WHAT YOU DID WAS WORSE, LYING IS THE WORSE." she texts.
I ignore her after that but the whole ordeal has left me confused and I feel guilt in lying to Elisa, even if she was being shady to begin with. Am I wrong for having tricked her into attending an intervention with her family?
submitted by jtreddit702 to amiwrong [link] [comments]
Liz has told me how Elisa borrowed $500 from her that she never paid back as well as over $5000 in total from friends, family and other acquaintances. She says that Elisa is irresponsible with money and has gotten into debt despite her Instagram showing her going on trips to Las Vegas and even out of the country. I'm also told that Elisa ignores or straight up blocks people or even family that keeps asking if she'll ever pay them back.
About 2 weeks ago, Elisa hits me up randomly asking if I can loan her $1000 as she claims to have given her mom emergency funds for surgery. She promises to pay me back but I said I'd have to think about it. She also asks for it in cash, which raises my red flags. I tell Liz about this and she knows Elisa is just lying as her mom is well and walking around with no issues. Liz then asks for a favor, she asks me to play along and trick Elisa into going with me on some trip but in reality, take her to her family's house so they can all confront her. I don't feel comfortable about this though but Liz begs me and says Elisa won't answer anyone's call or text and she needs to be put on blast.
Remembering how an ex once scammed money out of me, I decide to go along and ask Elisa that I'd loan her the money but if she could be my guest on a brunch trip I was having. I tell her it's with my "wealthy friend" who owns a private yacht. Elisa jumps at the chance and I pick her up at her apartment and drive her to Liz's brothers house (Elisa doesn't know where Liz's brother lives) and we go inside. There, Elisa finds about 12 of her extended family and they all start yelling and asking where their money is at. Elisa looks shocked and confused. Elisa starts yelling at me.
"You tricked me. You said we were going to your friend's house!" Elisa yells. Liz jumps in.
"You leave him out of this! This is between you and all of us!" Liz yells. The yelling and arguing continues as Elisa tries to leave but her older uncle stops her and tells her she needs to figure this out. Elisa is in tears at one point. Liz's brother comes up to me at one point.
"Sorry to get you involved bro. Don't feel bad. She had this coming to her." he says. He goes on to say I can leave so I do. Later that evening, Elisa texts me.
'FUCK YOU ASSHOLE. HOW DARE YOU LIE TO ME. I WAS WILLING TO GO HAVE BRUNCH WITH YOU AND INSTEAD, YOU LEFT ME WITH MY CRAZY ASS FAMILY AND THEIR JUDGEMENTAL ASSES."
I go on to explain what I know about her "borrowing" money from everyone.
"I DON'T NEED MONEY. I DEFINETLY DONT NEED YOURS. EVEN IF I TOOK SOME OF THEIR MONEY, WHAT YOU DID WAS WORSE, LYING IS THE WORSE." she texts.
I ignore her after that but the whole ordeal has left me confused and I feel guilt in lying to Elisa, even if she was being shady to begin with. Am I wrong for having tricked her into attending an intervention with her family?
2024.05.20 20:09 scbeibdd Overwhelmed by dog?
Hey everyone,
I'm sorry for the upcoming wall of text, but i really need to get it off my chest and hope to maybe get some advice.
So three years back we got a puppy from the animal rescue. She looked like a rough haired collie mix, I grew up with a French Bulldog and then later had a Cane Corso with my ex boyfriend till she was 6 and they moved away to a different city. Both dogs turned out amazing.
An important side note here: as I am still a student, we made a family decision to get a dog together with my parents. So it had to be a dog that we were all comfortable with. I really didn't care what breed of dog we would get, as long as it wasn't tiny, and not a working breed. This excluded most shepherds.
Well, as life has it, my mom fell in love with our girl from the pictures the animal rescue posted online. I warned her that she would not grow up to be a smaller dog like my parents wanted, and that she looked like a shepherd, albeit a rough collie. My mom grew up with a rough collie and said they were very trainable dogs and quite calm. I was so desperate to have a dog in my life again that I agreed, and a couple of weeks later, our girl was here.
She was brought to us in pretty bad shape, kennel cough, and a huge flesh wound on her tail from where someone had accidentally slammed it in the door (and apparently not treated it?).
Behavioural difficuties started almost instantly. We managed to work through most of them though: food aggression/ anxiety (she would even gobble up water, the first and second bowl of it, as if scared someone would take it from her) and generally scared of everything. Once we got past the fear though, the guarding instinct kicked in. And they kciekd in bad. There is a big field that here where dogs are allowed to run free. At some point, she started attacking people who would dare walk by the field wihout their own dog. She tried to intimidate any guests we had. I once went to the bathroom and left my friend in the living room. When I came back he was clutching his ears while sitting on the couch. I asked him what the fuck happened, apparently while I was gone, she first "bullied" him till he sat down on the couch, then started biting his fingers when he tried to text me. Other friends had to go through similiar fates, weren't allowed to stand up from chairs etc. We got through all of that, and we also had two trainers come by who gave us some good pointers.
However, today, we have similiar but different problems, and i'm at my wits end. By now, we also did a DNA test and found out she is mostly a bohemian shepherd, which is the forefather breed of all German Shepherds. She is a spitting image of the breed too. So avoiding getting a workign line breed didn't work out at all :')
She recently attacked a dog who "charged" my mom because he was apparently a bit too excited to say hello. He had to get stitches because she put two holes in his shoulder. When we go outside, I usually bring her ball and we play fetch throughout the park (and avoid the dog park so there isnt any conflic potential), however, too many assholes just do not care when I ask them to keep their off leash dogs from running up to us when we are playing fetch (mind you, we purposefully go to places where there is nobody around). My dog's recall is perfect, and i put her on the leash and take the ball away, but the other dog often ignores their owner and runs up to us and starts harassing my dog. She becomes aggressive towards the other dog in this setting. We've had a couple of fights blow up like this.
If I dont bring her her ball, we walk through the dog park, and sometimes she even invites other dogs to play. However, there are other days when she decides to find something else to guard instead, and then shit hits the fan. A couple of months back, she was eating a piece of dirt, then lost interest and walked away. However, then another dog came and started sniffing that space, and my dog instantly ran over and started fletching her teeth. The other dog didnt back down, and they got into a fight. It ended up with me having to go to the hospital because the other dog bit me while I was pulling them apart, because the other dogs owner was this old lady who only stood in shock while opening and closing her mouth silently like a damn fish out of the water. Also, if I dont play fetch with her, she is often even more restless at home than she already is.
That is the next problem: she is so, so fucking high energy, and I just dont know how to deal with it. I walk her for an hour three times a day, during each walk we: do obedience, do impulse training, i make her do nose work (hide food in tall grass or tree bark and make her search for it), and then play fetch. About an hour after we're home, she starts showing all signs of boredom. Brings me her toys, nudges me, or stops just sits and whines. As soon as I stand up from my chair, she jumps up all excited like we're going somewhere. I just dont know how to fucking tire her out. I feel like i'm failing her and at the same time, I feel like having her is taking more from me than it is giving back. Each walk is a damn stress test and like playing russian roulette to see if some idiot is going to let his off leash dog try to take her ball, or if she will just simply be in a bad mood and attack another dog for looking at her wrong.
We sometimes go to the forest near our house and i let her dig there because she loves it, but God forbid someone else walks by, she completely starts raging. Yesterday some dude with a huge banddog happened to walk by (thank God the other dog was on a leash) and my idiot tried her best to slip out of her collar to try and attack him.
It's like literally every damn day she's bringing me to my wits end. Today, some dog on the other end of the field squealed and she ran over, completely ignoring my recall (usually never happens) all while barking aggresively the whole way (around 800 m). She has a habit of "stepping in" when two dogs are fighting and protecting the "underdog". I'm just so fucking stressed out by her its insane. Right now, I was sitting writing my thesis, and after she was nudging me all day demanding attention (yes, I send her away, then she starts whining), she suddenly lets out this high pitch bark because once again some random fucking noise three houses away scared her. I now have a tinnitus in my right ear and funnily enough, this was for some reason my breaking point that nearly brought me to tears.
Anyways, I apologize for my ramblings, and would be very grateful for any advice you have.
Oh, and before you wonder about her being a "family dog", my parents are often abroad for a couple of months of a time, but this was all discussed beforehand and was fine by me. Its jsut none of us saw her becoming the way she is. Also, she managed to break both of my mom legs (one each on a seperate occasion) because she reacted to something and suddenly pulled my mom. She then proceeded to threaten anyone who tried to come close to my mom to help her, until I came.
Yes, I am currently looking into a trainer, but I am kind of scared this time. The first trainer we had was a completey dumbass who just drenched her in water without warning us beforehand for barking. My dog had a phobia of plastic bottles after that for months till i managed to get her past it. The second trainer was amazing but unfortunately moved away to the other side of the country.
submitted by scbeibdd to Dogtraining [link] [comments]
I'm sorry for the upcoming wall of text, but i really need to get it off my chest and hope to maybe get some advice.
So three years back we got a puppy from the animal rescue. She looked like a rough haired collie mix, I grew up with a French Bulldog and then later had a Cane Corso with my ex boyfriend till she was 6 and they moved away to a different city. Both dogs turned out amazing.
An important side note here: as I am still a student, we made a family decision to get a dog together with my parents. So it had to be a dog that we were all comfortable with. I really didn't care what breed of dog we would get, as long as it wasn't tiny, and not a working breed. This excluded most shepherds.
Well, as life has it, my mom fell in love with our girl from the pictures the animal rescue posted online. I warned her that she would not grow up to be a smaller dog like my parents wanted, and that she looked like a shepherd, albeit a rough collie. My mom grew up with a rough collie and said they were very trainable dogs and quite calm. I was so desperate to have a dog in my life again that I agreed, and a couple of weeks later, our girl was here.
She was brought to us in pretty bad shape, kennel cough, and a huge flesh wound on her tail from where someone had accidentally slammed it in the door (and apparently not treated it?).
Behavioural difficuties started almost instantly. We managed to work through most of them though: food aggression/ anxiety (she would even gobble up water, the first and second bowl of it, as if scared someone would take it from her) and generally scared of everything. Once we got past the fear though, the guarding instinct kicked in. And they kciekd in bad. There is a big field that here where dogs are allowed to run free. At some point, she started attacking people who would dare walk by the field wihout their own dog. She tried to intimidate any guests we had. I once went to the bathroom and left my friend in the living room. When I came back he was clutching his ears while sitting on the couch. I asked him what the fuck happened, apparently while I was gone, she first "bullied" him till he sat down on the couch, then started biting his fingers when he tried to text me. Other friends had to go through similiar fates, weren't allowed to stand up from chairs etc. We got through all of that, and we also had two trainers come by who gave us some good pointers.
However, today, we have similiar but different problems, and i'm at my wits end. By now, we also did a DNA test and found out she is mostly a bohemian shepherd, which is the forefather breed of all German Shepherds. She is a spitting image of the breed too. So avoiding getting a workign line breed didn't work out at all :')
She recently attacked a dog who "charged" my mom because he was apparently a bit too excited to say hello. He had to get stitches because she put two holes in his shoulder. When we go outside, I usually bring her ball and we play fetch throughout the park (and avoid the dog park so there isnt any conflic potential), however, too many assholes just do not care when I ask them to keep their off leash dogs from running up to us when we are playing fetch (mind you, we purposefully go to places where there is nobody around). My dog's recall is perfect, and i put her on the leash and take the ball away, but the other dog often ignores their owner and runs up to us and starts harassing my dog. She becomes aggressive towards the other dog in this setting. We've had a couple of fights blow up like this.
If I dont bring her her ball, we walk through the dog park, and sometimes she even invites other dogs to play. However, there are other days when she decides to find something else to guard instead, and then shit hits the fan. A couple of months back, she was eating a piece of dirt, then lost interest and walked away. However, then another dog came and started sniffing that space, and my dog instantly ran over and started fletching her teeth. The other dog didnt back down, and they got into a fight. It ended up with me having to go to the hospital because the other dog bit me while I was pulling them apart, because the other dogs owner was this old lady who only stood in shock while opening and closing her mouth silently like a damn fish out of the water. Also, if I dont play fetch with her, she is often even more restless at home than she already is.
That is the next problem: she is so, so fucking high energy, and I just dont know how to deal with it. I walk her for an hour three times a day, during each walk we: do obedience, do impulse training, i make her do nose work (hide food in tall grass or tree bark and make her search for it), and then play fetch. About an hour after we're home, she starts showing all signs of boredom. Brings me her toys, nudges me, or stops just sits and whines. As soon as I stand up from my chair, she jumps up all excited like we're going somewhere. I just dont know how to fucking tire her out. I feel like i'm failing her and at the same time, I feel like having her is taking more from me than it is giving back. Each walk is a damn stress test and like playing russian roulette to see if some idiot is going to let his off leash dog try to take her ball, or if she will just simply be in a bad mood and attack another dog for looking at her wrong.
We sometimes go to the forest near our house and i let her dig there because she loves it, but God forbid someone else walks by, she completely starts raging. Yesterday some dude with a huge banddog happened to walk by (thank God the other dog was on a leash) and my idiot tried her best to slip out of her collar to try and attack him.
It's like literally every damn day she's bringing me to my wits end. Today, some dog on the other end of the field squealed and she ran over, completely ignoring my recall (usually never happens) all while barking aggresively the whole way (around 800 m). She has a habit of "stepping in" when two dogs are fighting and protecting the "underdog". I'm just so fucking stressed out by her its insane. Right now, I was sitting writing my thesis, and after she was nudging me all day demanding attention (yes, I send her away, then she starts whining), she suddenly lets out this high pitch bark because once again some random fucking noise three houses away scared her. I now have a tinnitus in my right ear and funnily enough, this was for some reason my breaking point that nearly brought me to tears.
Anyways, I apologize for my ramblings, and would be very grateful for any advice you have.
Oh, and before you wonder about her being a "family dog", my parents are often abroad for a couple of months of a time, but this was all discussed beforehand and was fine by me. Its jsut none of us saw her becoming the way she is. Also, she managed to break both of my mom legs (one each on a seperate occasion) because she reacted to something and suddenly pulled my mom. She then proceeded to threaten anyone who tried to come close to my mom to help her, until I came.
Yes, I am currently looking into a trainer, but I am kind of scared this time. The first trainer we had was a completey dumbass who just drenched her in water without warning us beforehand for barking. My dog had a phobia of plastic bottles after that for months till i managed to get her past it. The second trainer was amazing but unfortunately moved away to the other side of the country.
2024.05.20 20:08 seekaterun Cabana Bay Stay, 5 day park to park recap
My family and I just got back from our trip and I always see recaps so here's mine!
We booked a Cabana Bay pool view family suite package via Costco Travel and the price was a pretty great deal. I enjoyed working with Costco Travel immensely!
SUNDAY
We arrived to the resort via the SuperStar Shuttle around 2pm. The SuperStar Shuttle wasn't anything exciting. The tvs didn't turn on and the driver didn't speak to the passengers. I thought it'd be like Disney's shuttles but alas. No biggie, though.
We checked in, zero wait there. We were assigned a room immediately in the Continental building, first section closest to the lobby on the 6th floor. We went to our room and it was fine. It felt dated, but the beds were soft and it was clean. There was an outside speaker directly below by the doors to Bayliner that was blaring music and it was loud in our room. Since it was only on during pool hours we sucked it up. We were barely going to be in the room anyway.We tried to take a quick nap since we had been up since 6am, but the music couldn't be drowned out via white noise. Thankfully in the couch area once we pulled the divider shut, it was barely noticeable and our 4 year old napped fine. Once she was awake, we headed to the pool. The pool was fun. Not super crowded, and we loved the lazy river. For dinner we ate at Hard Rock in CityWalk. Then we went to bed around 9:30. I learned the pullout couch my daughter was on was AWFUL. It was like sitting on 2x4s. However my 4 year old just slept on the extra pillows from the 2nd queen bed and she was perfectly fine.
MONDAY
We headed to the parks! We are not rope droppers at Disney nor here. We had breakfast at Bayliner Diner (mediocre) and left. We started in Seuss Landing where we rode everything. The longest wait was for the sneetches high in the sky ride and it was only 15 mins. We watched the live book show which was super cute.
Next was Jurassic Park. My 4 year old is only 40" so no rides here, but she thoroughly enjoyed Camp Jurassic. We stopped by the Discovery Center where my kiddo was chosen to name a baby trex. This put her on cloud 9. The discovery center was a lot of fun in itself!
We ate at Thunder Falls Terrance. The chicken was dry as chickenly possible. The corn on the cob and milkshakes were good though.
Next was Hogsmeade...something I was excited about. We first did the wand experience and then afterwards my daughter became hot mess express. She was not interested in WWoHP (how dare she.) So we took a break and relaxed a bit in some AC. After about an hour, we walked over to Universal Studios. We did the Minions ride then Villain Con. Loved both of them! When we left the minions ride, gru and 2 of his daughters were at the exit for meet and greets. When we left villain con and turned the corner, Kevin and Stuart were out for meet and greets. Universal doesn't disappoint with seeing characters! Next was Jimmy Fallon. It was alright.
We walked some circles, then our last ride was Kang and Kodos. On our way out, we saw the Animal Actors show started in 5 minutes so we grabbed a seat. The show was a lot of fun! Back at Cabana Bay we grabbed dinner at the Bayliner. The food was nothing to wrote home about as usual.
TUESDAY
Volcano Bay Day! Breakfast again at Bayliner. Still not great food, but whatever. We walked the short path over to the water park. My daughter is essentially a fish so she had a blast here. We've been to a lot of water parks and this is definitely one of the best, if not thee best. I like the condensed layout. We couldn't ride anything due to our shortie, but we had a blast. There was a severe t-storm that hit about 2 hours after we arrived. We were going to try and make it back to Cabana Bay, but the torrential downpour hit as soon as we exited. We sheltered under the entrance and after the storm passed (45min) we re-entered to a fairly empty park. Ate lunch there, swam, had a good time. We stayed until close and loved every minute. My in laws arrived this evening and checked into their (very quiet) room I. 1 section down from us. I was shocked they couldn't hear the music we could. We ate dinner at NBC bar at CityWalk which was delicious. That night we got some loud neighbors next to us, banging around and talking loudly. Sounded like a group of 20-somethings. They finally quieted down around 11.
WEDNESDAY
Back to the parks, but my kiddo spent the morning with her grandparents. My husband and I got to enjoy the rides. I LOVED the Jurassic River Adventure ride. However the long neck dino at the beginning might want to see a chiropractor for his messed up neck. We popped on over to Hogsmeade and took the train to Diagon Alley. There we grabbed lunch at The Leaky Cauldron - fish and chips. Delicious! We walked around Diagon Alley taking in the sights. It was not busy at all. We watched Celestina Warbeck sing and then I spent too much money on merch. We rode Escape from Gringotts and it was my favorite ride of the trip. We met back up with my in laws and headed back to the resort around 4. I cannot remember what we ate for dinner this evening. We had some pretty intense noise issues from our neighbors. Woke us up twice and my kid once. I have no idea what they were doing but I utilized the text service to which they responded they'd send a security officer to the room. They finally quieted down around 12:30am.
THURSDAY
I was done with the neighbors by this point so walked up to the front desk to see if we could switch rooms. She said yep, just need to pack up. Back to the room i walked. We left our kid at the pool with her grandparents and we packed up. Finally at 11:30 we were in a new room. It was completely quiet. No pool music noise at all. It was the furtherst building in the continental next to the tower, poolside. After getting settled again, back to Volcano Bay. I think our kid was absolutely whooped at this point. We should have done a no parks, rest at the resort day. It ended up being a bust since she cried and fussed most of the time. We came back to Cabana Bay around 3pm. We cleaned up and headed to CityWalk. We had dinner reservations at Toothsome and it was fabulous. Everything we ate was delicious. We spent the evening walking around CityWalk and shopping. That night we had no noise issues in our room, but the pool was packed since Gradventure had started. Middle schoolers everywhere!
FRIDAY
Last parks day. Mid-breakfast at Bayliner. We began the morning in Universal Studios where we met everyone. Betty Boop, Scooby-Doo Gang, Marilyn Monroe, Marge and Bart, Beetelgeuse. We did ET which I ADORED. I didn't expect to enjoy it so much. Then we went to the Bourne Stuntacular and it was mind blowing. My mouth was open the whole time. It ended up being our favorite show. Again, didn't expect to love it since I haven't seen a Bourne movie in ages but it was extremely well done. Next up we rode Transformers... no one was a fan of that one. We ate lunch at the Irish pub (can't remember the name). Service was bad. I think she forgot we existed, but food was food. Upon leaving we saw the Blues Bros show and took some pictures with the stilt walkers in front of the mummy ride. We met up with my in laws upon their exit from the horror makeup show and they took our kiddo back to Cabana Bay to swim around 330. My husband and I went to Kings Cross, waited about an hour with hordes of middle schoolers, then in Hogsmeade we grabbed some butterbeer. We rode flight of the hippogriff and trekked over to Jurassic Park again. We rode Kong after a 25 minute technical delay. We both didn't think it was worth the wait. By then the park was closing so we headed out. We picked up our daughter and went to Aventura across the street. Dinner there was delicious! Back at Cabana Bay we swam then fell asleep.
SATURDAY
check out day. Check out was easy. We had a late afternoon flight delayed by 4 hours due to storms but made it home around 10pm. SuperStar Shuttle was great. Our driver told us jokes and they played Rise of Gru on the tv. I'm now in post vacation blues mode :(
SUMMARY
I felt it hard to not compare to Disney since we've done Disney a lot minus COVID years. Disney's resorts were all cleaner, food was all better quality, and the overall atmosphere is more magical. We've stayed at 4 Disney resorts from economy to luxury and all were stellar. I found Cabana Bay to be lower quality than Pop Century at Disney.
Cons about Cabana Bay: The grounds were not well kept...cigarette butts everywhere. The pool area was trashed. I hate to say it but it was like the caliber of people in the resort just didnt care about litter or cleanliness. I watched families toss their trash in the sand and leave wet, used towels on the ground (towel returns were readily available.) When the pool closed, there were families that were literally arguing with the lifeguards because their watch said they still had 3 minutes. 2 families just berating the lifeguards!? Awkward. The Bayliner constantly had drink machines down and the food was blegh except for a few things. The pool was great but for some reason had no small youth life vests? Super weird. That would seem like the size you most need. The noise problems with room #1 put a damper on our nights, but the new room was great so that was just poor luck initially. More than once we entered an elevator that reeked of weed. I smoke weed, but it was a turn off to be in a hot elevator with it. Sofa beds are bad. I saw other people talk about this, too. Buy a topper!
Pros about Cabana Bay: transportation. Literally never waited longer than 5-10 min. Bus drivers were all so nice. The gift shop employees were delightful and the arcade and bowling alley were clean and an added bonus. The milkshakes from the malt shop were AMAZING!! The main pool was large and the slide and splash pad was great. Check in and ticket pick up was a breeze. The middle schoolers packed the resort beginning on Thursday, but the chaperones kept them in check so we were never bothered.
Final note... Going from CB to Aventura and Sapphire Falls across the street was like daylight and dark. Those 2 resorts were quiet and felt way more like Disney's moderate or luxury resorts: clean, peaceful, modern. I'd definitely stay in one of those next time.
submitted by seekaterun to UniversalOrlando [link] [comments]
We booked a Cabana Bay pool view family suite package via Costco Travel and the price was a pretty great deal. I enjoyed working with Costco Travel immensely!
SUNDAY
We arrived to the resort via the SuperStar Shuttle around 2pm. The SuperStar Shuttle wasn't anything exciting. The tvs didn't turn on and the driver didn't speak to the passengers. I thought it'd be like Disney's shuttles but alas. No biggie, though.
We checked in, zero wait there. We were assigned a room immediately in the Continental building, first section closest to the lobby on the 6th floor. We went to our room and it was fine. It felt dated, but the beds were soft and it was clean. There was an outside speaker directly below by the doors to Bayliner that was blaring music and it was loud in our room. Since it was only on during pool hours we sucked it up. We were barely going to be in the room anyway.We tried to take a quick nap since we had been up since 6am, but the music couldn't be drowned out via white noise. Thankfully in the couch area once we pulled the divider shut, it was barely noticeable and our 4 year old napped fine. Once she was awake, we headed to the pool. The pool was fun. Not super crowded, and we loved the lazy river. For dinner we ate at Hard Rock in CityWalk. Then we went to bed around 9:30. I learned the pullout couch my daughter was on was AWFUL. It was like sitting on 2x4s. However my 4 year old just slept on the extra pillows from the 2nd queen bed and she was perfectly fine.
MONDAY
We headed to the parks! We are not rope droppers at Disney nor here. We had breakfast at Bayliner Diner (mediocre) and left. We started in Seuss Landing where we rode everything. The longest wait was for the sneetches high in the sky ride and it was only 15 mins. We watched the live book show which was super cute.
Next was Jurassic Park. My 4 year old is only 40" so no rides here, but she thoroughly enjoyed Camp Jurassic. We stopped by the Discovery Center where my kiddo was chosen to name a baby trex. This put her on cloud 9. The discovery center was a lot of fun in itself!
We ate at Thunder Falls Terrance. The chicken was dry as chickenly possible. The corn on the cob and milkshakes were good though.
Next was Hogsmeade...something I was excited about. We first did the wand experience and then afterwards my daughter became hot mess express. She was not interested in WWoHP (how dare she.) So we took a break and relaxed a bit in some AC. After about an hour, we walked over to Universal Studios. We did the Minions ride then Villain Con. Loved both of them! When we left the minions ride, gru and 2 of his daughters were at the exit for meet and greets. When we left villain con and turned the corner, Kevin and Stuart were out for meet and greets. Universal doesn't disappoint with seeing characters! Next was Jimmy Fallon. It was alright.
We walked some circles, then our last ride was Kang and Kodos. On our way out, we saw the Animal Actors show started in 5 minutes so we grabbed a seat. The show was a lot of fun! Back at Cabana Bay we grabbed dinner at the Bayliner. The food was nothing to wrote home about as usual.
TUESDAY
Volcano Bay Day! Breakfast again at Bayliner. Still not great food, but whatever. We walked the short path over to the water park. My daughter is essentially a fish so she had a blast here. We've been to a lot of water parks and this is definitely one of the best, if not thee best. I like the condensed layout. We couldn't ride anything due to our shortie, but we had a blast. There was a severe t-storm that hit about 2 hours after we arrived. We were going to try and make it back to Cabana Bay, but the torrential downpour hit as soon as we exited. We sheltered under the entrance and after the storm passed (45min) we re-entered to a fairly empty park. Ate lunch there, swam, had a good time. We stayed until close and loved every minute. My in laws arrived this evening and checked into their (very quiet) room I. 1 section down from us. I was shocked they couldn't hear the music we could. We ate dinner at NBC bar at CityWalk which was delicious. That night we got some loud neighbors next to us, banging around and talking loudly. Sounded like a group of 20-somethings. They finally quieted down around 11.
WEDNESDAY
Back to the parks, but my kiddo spent the morning with her grandparents. My husband and I got to enjoy the rides. I LOVED the Jurassic River Adventure ride. However the long neck dino at the beginning might want to see a chiropractor for his messed up neck. We popped on over to Hogsmeade and took the train to Diagon Alley. There we grabbed lunch at The Leaky Cauldron - fish and chips. Delicious! We walked around Diagon Alley taking in the sights. It was not busy at all. We watched Celestina Warbeck sing and then I spent too much money on merch. We rode Escape from Gringotts and it was my favorite ride of the trip. We met back up with my in laws and headed back to the resort around 4. I cannot remember what we ate for dinner this evening. We had some pretty intense noise issues from our neighbors. Woke us up twice and my kid once. I have no idea what they were doing but I utilized the text service to which they responded they'd send a security officer to the room. They finally quieted down around 12:30am.
THURSDAY
I was done with the neighbors by this point so walked up to the front desk to see if we could switch rooms. She said yep, just need to pack up. Back to the room i walked. We left our kid at the pool with her grandparents and we packed up. Finally at 11:30 we were in a new room. It was completely quiet. No pool music noise at all. It was the furtherst building in the continental next to the tower, poolside. After getting settled again, back to Volcano Bay. I think our kid was absolutely whooped at this point. We should have done a no parks, rest at the resort day. It ended up being a bust since she cried and fussed most of the time. We came back to Cabana Bay around 3pm. We cleaned up and headed to CityWalk. We had dinner reservations at Toothsome and it was fabulous. Everything we ate was delicious. We spent the evening walking around CityWalk and shopping. That night we had no noise issues in our room, but the pool was packed since Gradventure had started. Middle schoolers everywhere!
FRIDAY
Last parks day. Mid-breakfast at Bayliner. We began the morning in Universal Studios where we met everyone. Betty Boop, Scooby-Doo Gang, Marilyn Monroe, Marge and Bart, Beetelgeuse. We did ET which I ADORED. I didn't expect to enjoy it so much. Then we went to the Bourne Stuntacular and it was mind blowing. My mouth was open the whole time. It ended up being our favorite show. Again, didn't expect to love it since I haven't seen a Bourne movie in ages but it was extremely well done. Next up we rode Transformers... no one was a fan of that one. We ate lunch at the Irish pub (can't remember the name). Service was bad. I think she forgot we existed, but food was food. Upon leaving we saw the Blues Bros show and took some pictures with the stilt walkers in front of the mummy ride. We met up with my in laws upon their exit from the horror makeup show and they took our kiddo back to Cabana Bay to swim around 330. My husband and I went to Kings Cross, waited about an hour with hordes of middle schoolers, then in Hogsmeade we grabbed some butterbeer. We rode flight of the hippogriff and trekked over to Jurassic Park again. We rode Kong after a 25 minute technical delay. We both didn't think it was worth the wait. By then the park was closing so we headed out. We picked up our daughter and went to Aventura across the street. Dinner there was delicious! Back at Cabana Bay we swam then fell asleep.
SATURDAY
check out day. Check out was easy. We had a late afternoon flight delayed by 4 hours due to storms but made it home around 10pm. SuperStar Shuttle was great. Our driver told us jokes and they played Rise of Gru on the tv. I'm now in post vacation blues mode :(
SUMMARY
I felt it hard to not compare to Disney since we've done Disney a lot minus COVID years. Disney's resorts were all cleaner, food was all better quality, and the overall atmosphere is more magical. We've stayed at 4 Disney resorts from economy to luxury and all were stellar. I found Cabana Bay to be lower quality than Pop Century at Disney.
Cons about Cabana Bay: The grounds were not well kept...cigarette butts everywhere. The pool area was trashed. I hate to say it but it was like the caliber of people in the resort just didnt care about litter or cleanliness. I watched families toss their trash in the sand and leave wet, used towels on the ground (towel returns were readily available.) When the pool closed, there were families that were literally arguing with the lifeguards because their watch said they still had 3 minutes. 2 families just berating the lifeguards!? Awkward. The Bayliner constantly had drink machines down and the food was blegh except for a few things. The pool was great but for some reason had no small youth life vests? Super weird. That would seem like the size you most need. The noise problems with room #1 put a damper on our nights, but the new room was great so that was just poor luck initially. More than once we entered an elevator that reeked of weed. I smoke weed, but it was a turn off to be in a hot elevator with it. Sofa beds are bad. I saw other people talk about this, too. Buy a topper!
Pros about Cabana Bay: transportation. Literally never waited longer than 5-10 min. Bus drivers were all so nice. The gift shop employees were delightful and the arcade and bowling alley were clean and an added bonus. The milkshakes from the malt shop were AMAZING!! The main pool was large and the slide and splash pad was great. Check in and ticket pick up was a breeze. The middle schoolers packed the resort beginning on Thursday, but the chaperones kept them in check so we were never bothered.
Final note... Going from CB to Aventura and Sapphire Falls across the street was like daylight and dark. Those 2 resorts were quiet and felt way more like Disney's moderate or luxury resorts: clean, peaceful, modern. I'd definitely stay in one of those next time.
2024.05.20 17:59 chaos_knight_xy Boruto Boudicans ch. 37 part 2
 | Meanwhile while all this was happening, John Graham was taking a walk in Bodeland. submitted by chaos_knight_xy to u/chaos_knight_xy [link] [comments] Graham loved taking walks in the Boudican settlement, surrounded by walls, he had done it often, despite the many months that have passed. Every time he does it, he is amazed how, despite being in a different country, the Boudicans have turned it into a landscape similar to mainland Boudica. Graham enjoyed the constant wonders of walking through town. Bam! A rubber ball hit Graham in his chest, however he did not feal it at all. Rather he was surprised at where the ball came from, for he wasn't paying attention. He picked it up. "Hey, our ball." Said a boy, about six years old, along with other boys holding hurling sticks. "Oh, is this yours?" Said Graham. "Well, here you go just be more careful where you aim it, I don't want you hit anyone else." Graham handed back the ball. "Ok, yessir sir Graham." Replied one of the boys, at once the boys went back to playing their game. Graham continued on his path, after a while he exchanged a few waves with people on the road. Graham's people, the people of Bodeland, have accidentally calling him Sir John Graham, from time to time. And each time, Graham had to correct them. A squire and a knight did look similar in Boudica, the main difference between a squire and a knight was a knight was usually older, around 15 or older. Although there are a few exceptions, that Graham has heard about, although they may just be rumors. RRRRRMMMMmmmmm! Graham felt his stomach growl. He decided it was time to eat his fill for breakfast. He went to the local bakery. "Mr. John Graham, it has been a while!" said the head baker, Mrs. Baird. "What can I get for you today." "I shall have jelly tart." Said Graham, putting down a silver coin to pay for the tart, as well as tip. "I need to eat something before studying under the Steward. "Coming right up." Said Mrs. Baird, turning to her husband, Mr. Baird, who enjoyed baking, while his wife, Mrs. Baird managed everything. "You heard him Larry, make him a jelly tart, larger than usual, and put a poached egg on the side. Graham was about to open his mouth, but Mrs. Baird spoke first. "On the house, Graham cracker." Said Mrs. Baird. "I don't even need that much, Mrs. Baird." Said Graham. "Oh, come on you are growing boy, you've done so much for us already keeping everyone safe, little knight." Replied Mrs. Baird. "Right, Larry!" "Right, dear." Replied Mr. Larry Baird. "Also have to thank you, especially your sister for that cookie recipes." Said Mrs. Baird. Mrs. Baird then handed Graham his food. "I'll be sure, to give Mary your regards." Said Graham. "Good luck on your studies, Graham cracker." Said Mrs. Baird. Graham left the bakery shop; after that, Mrs. Baird was like another mother to Graham, she cooked the best baked goods he had ever tasted. He loved everything about Bodeland, well, except for their disdain for his brother in arms, William Wallace. "Well, nothing is perfect." Though Graham. "But Naruto had won people over, maybe if William tried, he could do the same." Graham did not reflect any further, he had to go study under the high steward of Bodeland. The High Steward was Steward Andreas Halliday who was of common birth, yet excelled at Universities in the Papal states, islands east of Boudica, home to the Boudican Church. Graham himself was an extroverted outgoing guy, however he felt that he fell behind Stewart and William Wallace in certain aspects, mainly smarts and education. Unlike Stewart and Wallace, Graham struggled reading and learning new information. He didn't know why, but it just was tough for him. Graham passed his natural Boudican education befitting a squire, but deep down he felt he underperformed. Graham desired to be a hero like Naruto Uzumaki, and heroes have challenges they must overcome. So, Graham felt he must overcome his hurdle in education. So, Graham, with his Boudican money purchased time from the Bodeland High Steward to educate him. Meanwhile, Ehou and William Wallace were still traveling north. Ehou felt unnerved, through the ride, looking anxiously at his side dagger. He had lied to his mother about sleeping pills, rather he actually went to see the doctor. He had the doctor wipe his visit from hospital records because he wanted it private. Ehou tried remembering what happened after the tournament, but it was a blank. William Wallace then stopped the both of them on the road. William then got off his horse, then took out his mace. Ehou's blood pressure skyrocketed, he fumbled, fell off his horse, and dropped all his weapons, and ran away. "Wait, Ehou." Cried Wallace. But Ehou was gone, he just kept running, and running. Eventually Ehou found himself in a field, sitting on a stump. He looked down at the ground, unsure of his life. He started crying. "Ehou." Said Wallace, finally caught up. "What has gotten into you, you have been acting weird, ever since after the squire's tourney." Ehou looked towards William Wallace with tearful eyes. William was taken aback. "I killed him!" cried Ehou. "I killed Scrope!" William was shocked. "I'm sorry, I lied, I-I can't be warrior anymore." Said Ehou with a sad expression. "Killing is to-to much." https://preview.redd.it/ghocdn65tl1d1.png?width=780&format=png&auto=webp&s=63db55a57ae039dbb7168832e87478a9d8fc7cc5 Meanwhile the High Steward of Bodeland was in his place of work in Bodeland. Steward Andreas Halliday was working on a letter to Shinobi businessmen and work colleagues of his. A servant came in, with more letters from his business compatriots. "Thank you, Matthias." Said Andreas. "My pleasure, sir." Replied the servant. Andreas continues to read the letters of concern or replies to his own concerns. He then remembers a meeting he hosted with them. A meeting about a couple of weeks ago. "Preposterous." Said one businessman. "This whole idea of peace in the Land of Fire is a joke." Granted these men were of Shinobi origin, Andreas was surprised to hear men of the Shinobi World up set at the state of affairs in their own country. "Who thought it was a good idea to put an uneducated brute in charge of a whole village, and it's welfare." Said another. "I get you need a powerful leader in times of war, but we are in "peace.", living in peace is a lot more complicated than living in war." "It shouldn't be!" said different Shinobi businessmen. "The Hokage takes forever to approve paperwork, business is slow because of him, who though a warrior would be a good businessman, or politician in the time of peace, if you ask me, he is a war leader, not peace leader. One day, I thought he actually got better at economics, but from what I hear the Boudican William Wallace, who is actually educated, did the paperwork with ease, and actually made business for us run smoothly that day, but then it was back to being bad like it is always." "Don't you dare speak that name, William Wallace!" Said Andreas. "William Wallace is cold blooded murderer." The businessmen looked at each other after Andreas's statement. "Anyways, that doesn't matter to us." Replied businessmen. "Whatever your feud with this half-Boudican, Balliol says if the Leaf knew the truth about him, there would be too many questions." Andreas composed himself. "Right, forgive me, on to Business then." Said Andreas. A different businessmen came up with paper. "Finally, we are going to discuss the Land of Fire government." He spoke. "Times have changed, they are more complicated in peace, than war, we need a Democratic government." "A democratic government?" said Andreas with surprise. "Interesting, although Boudica didn't have that, not exactly at least. I have had children of nobility be my wards of mine for bit, so they may learn about studies, government, and the people, they would one day rule, then again, we are instilling our values in them, so in a way it is a form of democracy, because we are showing the children of the ruling class how to best rule us, by understanding our struggles. So, I can see my Boudican culture being a form of democracy, if the common folk help raise the future class. It explains why we kept peace for as long as we can remember." "I agree on the democratic aspect, but you have a Boudican culture, we have a Shinobi one." replied one of the businessmen. "Different cultures require different solutions, right now we live under a dictatorship of uneducated warriors, who think battle can decide leadership in politics, government, and the economy. Same applies to the noble clans, they hold all the power, and their heirs receive it on a silver platter for free, no matter what. Yet us businessmen worked ourselves up from nothing, and yet we have no say in government, we know what is best for the common folk, because we are of the common folk, we create business, we create jobs, we make sure our children understand the importance of working hard and establishing themselves. We need a Democracy, and Balliol will help us achieve it. If we don't succeed, much more crimes will happen under Dictatorship. Doesn't matter if Naruto Uzumaki seems like a good guy, in our eyes, he is an awful Government official, Hiruzen Sarutobi was also considered a good Hokage, yet look what happened under his watch, the Uchiha massacre!" The Businessmen start murmuring among themselves, agreeing with one another. "I agree." Said Andreas. "No matter how you look at it, the Uchiha massacre was not justified, they should have known the Uchiha would retaliate for how piss poorly they have been treated. Being blamed by the nine tales attack, racially discriminated against, especially by the Second Hokage, forced to be outcasts of the village, oh even worse guilt tripped one of their own to carry out the massacre, talk about exploitation." "Correct." Replied one of the businessmen. "We are different, we make sure not to exploit our workers, or else, no-one would support us, in fact, pay your workers justly and treating them well, this way makes more profit for everyone in the long run." "But Naruto and Sasuke, as well as the other members of the Konoha are just two powerful, no one can stand against them, no wonder there is peace." said one of the other businessmen. "There is peace by fear, because anyone who would go openly against them would be annihilated." All the businessmen nodded in agreement, so now they have to discuss a different course of action. "Whatever our course will be gentlemen." Remembered Andreas. "Balliol will come up with the proper procedure, perhaps we may gain influence from Lord Comyn marrying the Princess Asami." Andreas at that moment stopped remembering the meeting. He was back in his office. He realized he broke his writing quill. He closed his eyes and sighed. "We must establish our democracy." Said Andreas to himself. "But first we must be patient." At that moment, a servant knocked on the door. "Sir, your scheduled pupil has arrived." Said the servant. "Very, well, send him in." replied Andreas. Graham was led in at once. "I am here Mr. Andreas." Said Graham. "As usual, shall we start your lessons." Replied Andreas. Graham nodded. Andreas began reviewing Boudican Literature and Mathematics with Graham. "Now how did Beowulf beat Grendel?" asked Andrea quizzing Graham. "By ripping off, his arm." Replied Graham. "Correct." said Andreas. "I seem you have improved." "Even so, I still struggle with the readings." Replied Graham. "When I try to read a page, it becomes hard to focus, I was only able to pass squire education, because I studied with others, but now it has been a while, and now I am ashamed that I am slowly forgetting literature. I can remember my training and skills, for me at least, muscle memory is easier than written memory, although the teachings on magic are a whole different story." "Graham, remember my question for you." Said Andreas. "Yes, Mr. Steward." Replied Graham. "Do you have the answer for my question on Democracy." Said Andreas. "Well, sir, I like the idea of people choosing who shall rule them." Said Andreas. "I mean personally I don't see, why you asked me the question though." "Just curious." Said Andreas, looking at Graham. "One thing for sure." Said Graham, in a joking voice. "I hope they vote for you, instead of me, I'd say I am a half decent warrior, but warriors don't make good peace leaders, if all they did to get there was fight. At the very least, they should have educated businessmen, help them out." "Exactly, that is why if you were voted, you would be a good leader, you recognize your short comings, and rather than ignore them, you get intelligent people to plug the gaps." Said Andreas, with excitement. Graham was surprised. "I guess, I can see where you are coming from." Said Graham. After a long important conversation, Graham left happy. Then he had a gut feeling, then smacked his face. "I am taking a little leap of faith." Said Graham. "Oh, I may have-." At once, something fast caught his eye, it was fast, but he was faster. Graham saw it was an owl with an expertly bandage wing, so he followed it. It was fast, so he had to run. As he followed, he analyzed the owl. He saw that the brace, it needed to fly with, was made of fine thin wood, flexible enough so the owl could flap its wings. He followed it for a while, finally going up steps. Then it finally stopped and landed on a rock bench. Graham had finally gotten to the place where the Owl had landed. "There you are! Ibet." Said a girl's voice. "You flew for longer than last time, let me examine your wing." Graham was amazed, that finally made owl wing cast, was made none other than this girl, about his age. Graham saw the girl had dark brown, fair skin and grey eyes; she analyzed the owl's wing expertly. "She is that smart?" thought Graham. The girl did not notice Graham, rather analyzed her owl, then took out a book to look to for something to help her in regard to the owl. Graham gave a small smile. "That's- that's a neat invention for the owl." Said Graham. https://preview.redd.it/czaal5c8tl1d1.png?width=704&format=png&auto=webp&s=00c4c4a7cc08b2ed478e3eab20a1b6b30c650f5b The girl looked up at him from her book. "Oh." She said surprised. "I didn't see you there, Squire." Graham smiled. "It is John Graham." Replied Graham. "John?" she said. "There's too many Johns, you shall be known as Graham to me." "Fair enough." Replied Graham. "And your name is?" "Marjory Halliday." Said Marjory. "Daughter of the Bodeland High Steward." Graham felt he would have trouble remembering that. "I'll call you Jory for short." Said Graham. Marjory crossed her arms. "Marjory is a unique name." said Jory in a disappointed tone. "Well, Jory sounds better." Replied Graham, smiling. Marjory closed her book aggressively. "Are you so forgettable, that you can't remember a name, or do you only remember the sword?" she said in a disappointed tone. Graham was embarrassed. "Yes, your right." Said Graham "I am very forgettable, that is why I study under the Steward, your father, I need to sharpen my mind." Jory was surprised. "I thought Squire's only need to sharpen their swords." Said Jory. "Well, what I seek I need to work for, one which I need not sharper my sword, but my mind as well, to sharpen off the dullness of my mind." Said Graham. Graham bowed before Jory, much to Jory's surprise. "I need all the learnings, I can get." Said Graham. "Please Jory, accept me as your humble student." Graham bowed. Jory's cheeks went pink, but only slightly. Graham still bowed. Jory then grabbed him by the ear. "Ow." Said Graham. "You are a weird squire, boy." Said Marjory. "And it's Marjory." "Alright, J-Marjory." Replied Graham. "Alright then, I accept, but you have to do whatever I tell you, mister." Said Marjory. Graham was embarrassed. Marjory put her hand on her chin. "Alright then, what to teach you?" Said Marjory. Jory looked at Ibet the owl. "Analyze Ibet's wing and tell me any observations." Ordered Marjory. "Um, ok." Said Graham. Graham went down on one knee and analyzed the owl's wing. "Well, I can see you sued good leather, thin wood, very thin, like paper to bandage the wing, as well as small string." Said Graham. "And I think, is that tar?" "Correct, you seem good with observations." Said Marjory. "But I am a trained Boudican squire, of course, I can make observations, such are needed to win let's say a fight, especially against an armored Boudican opponent." Said Graham. "But you see an observation, is a key to retaining information, like reading text, that is a form of information in observation." Said Marjory. "Yeah, I know but I get headaches from reading, while I am at peace swinging my sword." Said Graham. Marjory flicked Graham's forehead. "Then drink tea or wear an ice pack." Said Marjory. "There is saying that practice makes perfect." Graham still analyzed the Owl. Marjory thought for a second. "Why does a squire wish for the knowledge of librarians?" asked Jory. Graham looked towards Jory to answer her question, but he was shocked to find her face so close to his. Graham fell back a bit. "Ugh!, you startled me, Marjory." Said Graham. Marjory sighed. "Are you going to answer my question or not, weirdo." Said Marjory. Graham laughed a bit. "Alright." Replied Graham. "But it is a long story, so sit down." As he was explaining his reasons to her, Graham remembered how he told Steward Andreas similarly of his reasons, he then thought back to it. He remembers the scene to a tea. "I guess, I can see where you are coming from." Replied Graham, in regard to Andreas's question on a leader for Democracy. Andreas stopped writing. "Graham." Said Andreas. "Y-yes, sir." Said Graham. "I have a daughter who is your age." Said Andreas. Graham stood attention, he never knew Andreas had a daughter, let alone seen her anywhere before, I mean what man would bring his daughter to his work? "During the war, my children were scattered, dead or missing, I don't know." Said Andreas. "My youngest daughter is all I have left; she is dear to me." "Where is he going with this?" thought Graham. "When you and she are of age, I wish to give her to you to wed." said Andreas. Graham was shocked. "B-bride, but sir, you strike me as the type to be strict with whom your daughters would end up with." Said Graham "Oh, I am strict, in that regard." Replied Andreas. "But you are an exception, you who desires to be a great hero." Graham felt having a betrothal would be good for him, after all, Andreas's daughter would be a commoner, so any children born would be named Grahams in last name. A betrothal might set a bar to prove himself worthy, in the art of smarts, however when Andreas mentioned Graham's dream of "heroism." Graham blanked. Why does he want to be a great hero, one as great as Naruto Uzumaki? "Well, sir." Said Graham. "To be honest, a great hero is one who is powerful, I saw it for myself, when I was younger, I was weak, during the war, I couldn't even fight, I was stuck in a burning house, the rebels lit on fire, I was worried I would die a terrible death, but then I was saved, I saw what someone with power can do, they have the power to save, someone with power isn't weak, however I also learned one does not have power through the sword, but the mind as well." Graham noticed Andreas eyed him suspiciously. "But I sir, I don't want power, just for power's sake, well at least not entirely, but to have powers to save others, as I was once saved." Said Graham. "And the power of knowledge and studies to define my reasons for why I fight." "No need to explain, all humans desire power of a kind." Said Andreas. "Your daughter?" asked Graham. "Is-is she smart?" "Oh, yes, quite smart, maybe too smart, she can be gentle, however she is sharp at tung at times." Said Andreas. Graham sighed with relief. "Then I accept." Said Graham. "I trust you, Steward." Andreas was surprised. "Wouldn't you want to meet first, before giving me an answer." Said Andreas. "Steward, you have been nothing but kind to me, you have helped me with studies and overcome my dyslexia, at least a little bit." Said Graham with a small smile. "The fact you ask and accept my reasons for self-improvement, means I trust you all the more." Andreas shook Graham's hand. "Then it is settled then." Said Andreas. https://preview.redd.it/xbdnj3gctl1d1.png?width=766&format=png&auto=webp&s=0d457feac2d843592c5f8dc053c85761639c3402 Meanwhile, Squire John Stewart led an escort with a cartmen, with Mary and her friends. "Mighty kind of you to escort us, Squire Stewart." Said the cartmen. "But why must you wear a helmet." "It is no problem." Lied Stewart. "It looks cool." Stewart was upset with Graham. He thought he would have alone time with Mary, but Graham tricked him. Mary was distracted talking with her friends in the back cart. Luckily, he had a helmet on because his face was fixed in a visibly angry look. The girls in cart were talking about whatever stuff that Stewart did not care about. Stewart then thought back to what he wanted when making cheer with Wallace and Graham. "I said I wanted the secrets of this world." Thought Stewart. Stewart thought more, what he said was a bit of an exaggeration. He when he was talking about secrets, he more or less meant like intriguing secrets like "Why are we here." "Why do things have such order to them, and yet pure chaos at times." Or his favorite question, "Why is there something, rather than nothing." A question by a philosopher. The answer to this question is "It is." Stewart wanted to think more about the questions, perhaps the mystery of said secrets make them more the enjoyable to interpret, then just given a straight answer. Then Stewart remembered what Wallace told him all that time back. "I must be focused, especially when I am on duty." Thought Stewart to himself. "Hey, Squire!" said one of Mary's friends. Stewart turned his head. "Yeah!" replied Stewart. "So, what did Wallace actually do during the battle, you know instead of fight?" asked the girl. "Martha!" protested Mary Graham. "Why must you ask a question." "He did fight!" said Stewart. "He slew many more bandits then either me or Graham." "Be honest, did he force you to say that." Said Martha. "I mean he is a scary monster right." "Nope." Replied Stewart. "I agree, Martha." Said another girl. "He is probably lying, after all it must be hard on this boy, having the traitor as a superior." Other girls nodded in agreement. "Enough, girls." Cried Mary. "We are here to enjoy the festival, not talk about negative things, do you really want to sour the mood." The girls looked at each other. "Well." Said Martha. "I guess you're right." "One thing before we stop talking, a word of advice." Said Stewart. "William Wallace is better person than all of you combined, and you would be wise to not hate him, rather forgive him like the Boudican Church has." The girl crossed her arms without after that. "Mr. Oneil, when do we get to the festival." Asked one of the girls to diffuse the situation. "Oh, just a little while." Said Oneil, embarrassed by the argument in the back. There was silence on the ride, Stewart was soured, but hid it under his helmet. However, for some reason, he felt a little relieved in his mind. |
2024.05.20 17:41 jojobibop AITAH for getting mad at my brother for what he said about me and my boyfriend?
I know it's self-explanatory once you get the full context but I truly do need advice. Yes I have the right to be mad at the way my brother acted (I'll call him W 35). I'm (I'll call myself S 27 M) the youngest of 4 boys and one girl and our parents and one brother has passed away and one is in jail and we both completely disown our sister. So we only have each other. That's why I'm at a crossroads in this situation. He's not a bad person don't get me wrong, but to disrespect my significant other is is shot in the heart and it made me want to go no contact with him because I would never do that to his wife.
But I know deep down I'll never do that to my brother. Especially the confession he made to me on the way back to the train station. The short of it is he doesn't want to be here... And I had those thoughts too when I was younger... But his personality and not willingness to change for the better is taxing on me and my mental... I was just generally want to try and help him but I can't make someone do anything there not willing to do for themselves... I really and truly love my brother but... We both fucking know that we are all that we got in this world... I will never abandon my big brother... But I don't know how to feel...
Sorry that was hard to type... Reliving this shit from my oldest brother kills me inside...
And I apologize for my typing style I type like I talk.
Let me start from the beginning. (I'll call my brother W) W texted me out of the blue explaining he needs some cash, well for me money is nothing in the grand scheme of things but it's a necessity in this world. So I'll help out if I can. But in my apartment when I was talking to (I'll call my BF K) K and the seven years we've been together he flat out refused over the phone. K is my rock and helps me save and a whole lot more. K is financially stable but we both live a hour away and have our own lives and responsibilities. But no matter what we promise we'll spend the rest of our lifes together when were both stable. He takes care of his aunt and mother and I'm in a transitional living program. In a couple of years it'll look good for us.
But as for my bro W he has a wife that works, 4 kids an apartment and everything... And this is not the first time W asked me for money. And again I don't care 40 bucks is just 40 bucks, But what really pissed me off was W reaction to K refusing to transfer money to me because in retrospect K is right to not loan out money that you can't afford to loan out...
W said verbatim in a text on his way home on the train.
"Bro I love you and respect you but please tell your friend to mind his business and stay out of our family business please"
"He has no right to speak on anything we have going on as a family bruh real talk "
Reading that over it hurts so much... No one and I mean no one has the goddamn right to talk about my significant other like that... Ever... I'm actually proud of myself because back then if I was younger and he said that to my face I would have laid him out... Don't you ever dare do that to me and K!!! I would never talk about your wife or kids like that W... You didn't help us save, you didn't help me when I was broken starving and you didn't help us in any way shape or form these past YEARS!!! K DID!!! Well we're both out here by our fucking selves and you... And you W have the nerve to say he's not part of the family... I have never been mad at someone this much in a long time... You and Dad was the first ones I told I was Gay and you and Dad accepted me and to say he's not part of the family is the utmost disrespectful shit I've ever experienced from a family member...
So we were arguing in my apartment... Well not an argument but just letting feelings out... And W says
"I'm going home and I don't want to be a part of none of this"
That just shocked me to my core... I was wondering what did I do... You traveled on the train in the rain and get mad at what me and my significant other discussed about my savings... And then W said to me.
"No one should ever take control of you like that and you need to be a man and take care of yourself"
Sorry this is a straight up vent I didn't say this to my brother!!!
That's the first time W said something that was so fucking hurtful on a personal level in our entire lives... What the fuck did you think I've been doing the past 7 fucking years!!! while none of y'all (family) was helping me... I got up and made something of myself through the nitty and gritty! Hard ass times! And I only ask for help a couple of times! And y'all never fucking had it bruh!!! So you know what I did!!! got back fucking up and kept moving forward!!! You're asking for money from your little brother that's in a fucking shelter... Omg this is what I wanted to say to him but I didn't want to put him through that...
But I kept my composure and just try to talk to him as we walk to the train station...
Then he admitted he doesn't want to be here no more and I just kind of shut down... It's hard to explain... I told him about his kids his wife everything that he has... I completely understand and sympathize why he doesn't want to be here I felt the same way back then... But it was like talking to a brick wall like I wasn't even talking to my brother... I tried my best and watch Him walk to the train and told him I love you bro while he was still walking... He didn't even turn back... but he came back when I walked to 7-Eleven across the street and then we talk for a bit... I still gave him $20.. it was all I had on my card with cash back... He went home to his kids and wife... (I'm not saying this in a disrespectful way he smokes a lot) Most definitely use it to smoke weed... I'll try my best to be a good brother... But just don't know how to feel...
I'm sorry us kids (excluding my bum ass sister) been in a abusive relationship growing up with r n bruh
th our parent (Mother) and sister... I generally don't want to lose my brother but he crossed the line and I don't know how to feel...
I talked to K about this and showed him the text and he is extremely disappointed at my brother, He genuinely did not expect him to say that... I didn't either...
I wish I can just sit down and talk to W but he's not a talker... But I will not allow no one to talk about K like that... He's my family point blank... And if anyone doesn't see us as equals and a part of the family then I don't want to be a part of that family brother or not...
And I just want to clarify W is not homophobic... We just came up in the projects... (Southeast DC)
So AITAH to myself for not caring about my money literacy or to my brother for treating K like an outsider... I don't want to lose W... We are the only family we got...
Thank you for reading... I will read any comment y'all give me and comment back... I really need advice... Thank you again!
submitted by jojobibop to AITAH [link] [comments]
But I know deep down I'll never do that to my brother. Especially the confession he made to me on the way back to the train station. The short of it is he doesn't want to be here... And I had those thoughts too when I was younger... But his personality and not willingness to change for the better is taxing on me and my mental... I was just generally want to try and help him but I can't make someone do anything there not willing to do for themselves... I really and truly love my brother but... We both fucking know that we are all that we got in this world... I will never abandon my big brother... But I don't know how to feel...
Sorry that was hard to type... Reliving this shit from my oldest brother kills me inside...
And I apologize for my typing style I type like I talk.
Let me start from the beginning. (I'll call my brother W) W texted me out of the blue explaining he needs some cash, well for me money is nothing in the grand scheme of things but it's a necessity in this world. So I'll help out if I can. But in my apartment when I was talking to (I'll call my BF K) K and the seven years we've been together he flat out refused over the phone. K is my rock and helps me save and a whole lot more. K is financially stable but we both live a hour away and have our own lives and responsibilities. But no matter what we promise we'll spend the rest of our lifes together when were both stable. He takes care of his aunt and mother and I'm in a transitional living program. In a couple of years it'll look good for us.
But as for my bro W he has a wife that works, 4 kids an apartment and everything... And this is not the first time W asked me for money. And again I don't care 40 bucks is just 40 bucks, But what really pissed me off was W reaction to K refusing to transfer money to me because in retrospect K is right to not loan out money that you can't afford to loan out...
W said verbatim in a text on his way home on the train.
"Bro I love you and respect you but please tell your friend to mind his business and stay out of our family business please"
"He has no right to speak on anything we have going on as a family bruh real talk "
Reading that over it hurts so much... No one and I mean no one has the goddamn right to talk about my significant other like that... Ever... I'm actually proud of myself because back then if I was younger and he said that to my face I would have laid him out... Don't you ever dare do that to me and K!!! I would never talk about your wife or kids like that W... You didn't help us save, you didn't help me when I was broken starving and you didn't help us in any way shape or form these past YEARS!!! K DID!!! Well we're both out here by our fucking selves and you... And you W have the nerve to say he's not part of the family... I have never been mad at someone this much in a long time... You and Dad was the first ones I told I was Gay and you and Dad accepted me and to say he's not part of the family is the utmost disrespectful shit I've ever experienced from a family member...
So we were arguing in my apartment... Well not an argument but just letting feelings out... And W says
"I'm going home and I don't want to be a part of none of this"
That just shocked me to my core... I was wondering what did I do... You traveled on the train in the rain and get mad at what me and my significant other discussed about my savings... And then W said to me.
"No one should ever take control of you like that and you need to be a man and take care of yourself"
Sorry this is a straight up vent I didn't say this to my brother!!!
That's the first time W said something that was so fucking hurtful on a personal level in our entire lives... What the fuck did you think I've been doing the past 7 fucking years!!! while none of y'all (family) was helping me... I got up and made something of myself through the nitty and gritty! Hard ass times! And I only ask for help a couple of times! And y'all never fucking had it bruh!!! So you know what I did!!! got back fucking up and kept moving forward!!! You're asking for money from your little brother that's in a fucking shelter... Omg this is what I wanted to say to him but I didn't want to put him through that...
But I kept my composure and just try to talk to him as we walk to the train station...
Then he admitted he doesn't want to be here no more and I just kind of shut down... It's hard to explain... I told him about his kids his wife everything that he has... I completely understand and sympathize why he doesn't want to be here I felt the same way back then... But it was like talking to a brick wall like I wasn't even talking to my brother... I tried my best and watch Him walk to the train and told him I love you bro while he was still walking... He didn't even turn back... but he came back when I walked to 7-Eleven across the street and then we talk for a bit... I still gave him $20.. it was all I had on my card with cash back... He went home to his kids and wife... (I'm not saying this in a disrespectful way he smokes a lot) Most definitely use it to smoke weed... I'll try my best to be a good brother... But just don't know how to feel...
I'm sorry us kids (excluding my bum ass sister) been in a abusive relationship growing up with r n bruh
th our parent (Mother) and sister... I generally don't want to lose my brother but he crossed the line and I don't know how to feel...
I talked to K about this and showed him the text and he is extremely disappointed at my brother, He genuinely did not expect him to say that... I didn't either...
I wish I can just sit down and talk to W but he's not a talker... But I will not allow no one to talk about K like that... He's my family point blank... And if anyone doesn't see us as equals and a part of the family then I don't want to be a part of that family brother or not...
And I just want to clarify W is not homophobic... We just came up in the projects... (Southeast DC)
So AITAH to myself for not caring about my money literacy or to my brother for treating K like an outsider... I don't want to lose W... We are the only family we got...
Thank you for reading... I will read any comment y'all give me and comment back... I really need advice... Thank you again!
2024.05.20 17:07 Agneus [Online] [5e] [18+] [GMT+1] Virtues of Essence - Roleplay Focused Mystery and Lore Driven Forgotten Realms Campaign seeking a replacement player
“What defines virtue and how are we to gauge it? An inquiry that reverberates through epochs, its answer as fickle and capricious as the fates of those who deem to ask it. Duty, honor, justice - many over the ages would name these virtues, the conduits through which noble intentions find expression. Yet, as the battlefield of beliefs unfolds, a legion emerges, each as sworn to these principles as to obliterating all who would dare stake alike claim. Thus, battles rage and wars are waged and, in the end, those who are left are no more right than those fell by the blade. Alas, it is the victors whose ideals are etched into monuments for posterity. Except even words chiseled in unyielding stone are fated to fade in time. So is the wicked cycle destined to repeat in all its futility, its ephemeral prize seized again, only to be lost and sought anew. Try and picture, if for but a moment, a world where our rulers paused to reflect on the lessons of yore. They, too, would discern the elixir that enables one to escape the confines of memory—the very burden our fleeting nature forbids us to carry. Progress and evolution. Adaptability and transcendence. Everlasting and yet not stagnant, irrefutable, and yet fluid, these are the only true virtues. Thus, must we ever venture into the uncharted and unfamiliar for only from these unexplored domains may the truly virtuous arise.”
Where: Discord (Video and Voice) + FoundryVTT
When: every Saturday 5 - 9/10 pm GMT+2 (CEST), 11 am - 3/4 pm EST
Who: party of 4 players and a DM seeking one extra player
Updates: Recruitment updates will be posted here.
Hello there and well met! If you’ve made it past the flavor text (or skipped it) and through the basic info (hopefully didnt skip past that one) you might very well be at the right address! Without further ado onto the post.
As implied by the post title, this is an ongoing campaign (we are 12 sessions in at the time of this post). Due to some irl commitments weve recently dropped a player and are looking to replace them.
As the title suggests, this is a roleplay focused mystery/lore driven campaign. Expect an overreaching plot with ample secrets to uncover, conspiracies to unravel and eldritch truths to unearth. The first word of the password is "Doth". On the same level of importance or more important even be that the players preference, there is a variety of subplots to engage with, from small and goofy and random to ones rivaling the main story arc in complexity and variance. Among these, individual character story arcs play a leading role, at times seamlessly intertwined with the current focus of the party, at times separate and independent.
As was already mentioned and is further described below, this is a roleplay focused campaign and a roleplay heavy game. This means that roleplay exists as a unifying concept for all other aspects of the game including exploration, combat, and puzzles. That said DnD is only DnD with all three of its main pillars intact and this campaign is no exception in that regard. I very much enjoy the mechanical side of the game as well besides roleplay and so things like multiphase boss fights and custom magic items are definitely on the table.
I would describe my DMing style as driven, realistic, and involved but also very conscious about player agency and collaborative storytelling as core values that make TTRPGs so popular and unique. I spend a lot of time ensuring the worlds I create and the stories I want to tell feel alive. From hand-picked music, to fully voiced NPCs and scenic descriptions designed to breathe life into the campaign setting I daresay my games rival in quality those of the professional DMs that charge for each session.
There is a drawback to this all however. Second word of the password is "thy". I expect a lot from my players as well. Writing a story in DnD is not a one person job. It takes a collective effort of the entire group to create something truly unique, something that one can be proud while looking forward to each session. Unwinding and letting off steam means something else for everyone. For me it means losing myself in the creative process of roleplaying an NPC or describing a scene, watching my players masterfully portray their own characters or having the party derail my plans in an awesome unforeseen and unexpectedly enriching way. If you find yourself in any of what I just described than this may be a game for you. If you don’t, that’s fine. This is definitely not a game for everyone.
When it comes to setting of the campaign in the world of Faerun I have once again made a somewhat traditional pick and decided to place the onset of the game onto the Sword Coast, more precisely into the city of Waterdeep. If one of the key upsides of Forgotten Realms is diversity of content, Waterdeep is one of the best representations of this. Being the largest settlement on the known Faerun, Waterdeep offers nigh limitless options in terms of main story arc genre, character creation and character backstory implementation. It has everything every large TTRPG settlement ought to have (fickle upper class, enigmatic factions, quaint taverns and extravagant nightclubs, always in bad mood city watch, a castle and a harbor) as well as few pretty original ideas such as colossal definitely not alive statues, a city council where even its members don’t know each other’s identity and a massive dungeon right underneath the city where you can literally fall right from a tavern taproom.
In case you are wondering, while this campagn takes place primarily in the city of Waterdeep itself, there is nothing stopping the players from exploring past the city if they so choose. The final word of the password is "crack?". Different parts of the main plot and various subplots can and will encourage the party to explore Waterdeep environs and sometimes even further.
https://forms.gle/5kc4RbwavJPfT8PD9
______________________________________
PS: As a part of the questionnaire, you will be asked to submit a short piece of your narrative writing in a form of a google doc link (not a custom piece of writing, any relevant past one you have will do). Maybe best have that ready beforehand? On that note, dont apply for the game with a detailed backstory of a character you want to play that you arent willing to adapt to the conditions of the setting/campaign.
PSS: Not to discourage you but if you do make it through the questionnaire and into the second group of applicants you will be asked to do a discord interview with your webcam turned on. I am asking you to go through a lot for a game you might not even end up liking I know, but if you do end up liking it, all this effort will be well worth it as I am sure my other players would agree.
submitted by Agneus to lfg [link] [comments]
Where: Discord (Video and Voice) + FoundryVTT
When: every Saturday 5 - 9/10 pm GMT+2 (CEST), 11 am - 3/4 pm EST
Who: party of 4 players and a DM seeking one extra player
Updates: Recruitment updates will be posted here.
Hello there and well met! If you’ve made it past the flavor text (or skipped it) and through the basic info (hopefully didnt skip past that one) you might very well be at the right address! Without further ado onto the post.
🐲The campaign🐲
Having only just recovered from the Second Sundering and the War of the Silver Marches, the North had been ravaged by a whole new set of tumultuous events - the rise of the Cult of the Dragon and that of the Absolute, the Fall of Eltruel and the short reign of the beholder crime lord Xanathar just some among them. After a brief respite from the twisted and the unnatural the clouds once more begin to gather. Along the Long Road, whole hosts of wild beasts and monsters have been accosting travelers seemingly at random and in the grand metropolis of Waterdeep a sudden rise in crime seems to coincide with strange events passing unnoticed beneath the surface. Amidst all this, in spring of 1493 DR, a party of adventurers delves into a mystery of enchanted gemstones being utilized to nefarious ends by unknown perpetrators all the while navigating the labyrinthine twists of city faction politics.As implied by the post title, this is an ongoing campaign (we are 12 sessions in at the time of this post). Due to some irl commitments weve recently dropped a player and are looking to replace them.
As the title suggests, this is a roleplay focused mystery/lore driven campaign. Expect an overreaching plot with ample secrets to uncover, conspiracies to unravel and eldritch truths to unearth. The first word of the password is "Doth". On the same level of importance or more important even be that the players preference, there is a variety of subplots to engage with, from small and goofy and random to ones rivaling the main story arc in complexity and variance. Among these, individual character story arcs play a leading role, at times seamlessly intertwined with the current focus of the party, at times separate and independent.
As was already mentioned and is further described below, this is a roleplay focused campaign and a roleplay heavy game. This means that roleplay exists as a unifying concept for all other aspects of the game including exploration, combat, and puzzles. That said DnD is only DnD with all three of its main pillars intact and this campaign is no exception in that regard. I very much enjoy the mechanical side of the game as well besides roleplay and so things like multiphase boss fights and custom magic items are definitely on the table.
🧙♂️The DM🧙♂️
Hello there, Jay here, 25 yo law student from Central Europe currently working on finishing his master’s degree, trying to stay afloat in the current lease market. I study and work in a law firm by day and DM or play DnD by night (more like evening but night sounded cooler). I have been a big fan of TTRPGs since my early teens and of online DnD for the past five years. I’ve DMed multiple campaigns, finished CoS not least among them and I currently play in a long-term campaign. Before you ask, yes, my schedule is strained but not to the point I am unable to engage with my hobbies.I would describe my DMing style as driven, realistic, and involved but also very conscious about player agency and collaborative storytelling as core values that make TTRPGs so popular and unique. I spend a lot of time ensuring the worlds I create and the stories I want to tell feel alive. From hand-picked music, to fully voiced NPCs and scenic descriptions designed to breathe life into the campaign setting I daresay my games rival in quality those of the professional DMs that charge for each session.
There is a drawback to this all however. Second word of the password is "thy". I expect a lot from my players as well. Writing a story in DnD is not a one person job. It takes a collective effort of the entire group to create something truly unique, something that one can be proud while looking forward to each session. Unwinding and letting off steam means something else for everyone. For me it means losing myself in the creative process of roleplaying an NPC or describing a scene, watching my players masterfully portray their own characters or having the party derail my plans in an awesome unforeseen and unexpectedly enriching way. If you find yourself in any of what I just described than this may be a game for you. If you don’t, that’s fine. This is definitely not a game for everyone.
🏰The setting🏰
Forgotten Realms is a default setting of Dungeons and Dragons but it is anything but boring and mundane. With now decades worth of lore behind it, it offers an unparalleled opportunity for anyone wanting to build on solid foundations to bring their ideas to life. While it has garnered a lot of attention lately with the release of a certain videogame (more people now know Astarion than a good amount of Hollywood celebrities I’d say) it has had its loyal following even before then, being constantly expanded and living its own life in a host of both online and home games. It’s been a natural choice of mine for a while now and not once have I had any regrets. The third word of the password is "mirror". I feel with how great of a variety of content the Forgotten Realms offer everybody is able to pick something that suits their creative vision. In summary the Forgotten Realms almost feel like a real place with how much worldbuilding has been done with them and offer a diversity of content few other TTRPG settings can boast.When it comes to setting of the campaign in the world of Faerun I have once again made a somewhat traditional pick and decided to place the onset of the game onto the Sword Coast, more precisely into the city of Waterdeep. If one of the key upsides of Forgotten Realms is diversity of content, Waterdeep is one of the best representations of this. Being the largest settlement on the known Faerun, Waterdeep offers nigh limitless options in terms of main story arc genre, character creation and character backstory implementation. It has everything every large TTRPG settlement ought to have (fickle upper class, enigmatic factions, quaint taverns and extravagant nightclubs, always in bad mood city watch, a castle and a harbor) as well as few pretty original ideas such as colossal definitely not alive statues, a city council where even its members don’t know each other’s identity and a massive dungeon right underneath the city where you can literally fall right from a tavern taproom.
In case you are wondering, while this campagn takes place primarily in the city of Waterdeep itself, there is nothing stopping the players from exploring past the city if they so choose. The final word of the password is "crack?". Different parts of the main plot and various subplots can and will encourage the party to explore Waterdeep environs and sometimes even further.
📃The requirements📃
No exceptions here. Unless otherwise stated, the requirements must be met at the time of application.- to apply you need to be 20+ yo
- you need a functioning webcam (at the time of application) and a stable internet connection - we will be using both video and voice on discord and as a general rule Wifi doesn’t handle long video calls well (believe me when I say I speak from experience) so cable or other similar form of stable connection is strongly encouraged
- you need a Discord account and you will need a Forge account - Forge is a hosting service for Foundry, don’t worry, you won’t need to input any personal info (besides maybe an email) to register and I will be footing the bill
- you need a PC that can and will run Foundry Virtual Tabletop - check the minimum requirements on the Foundry website, a fair warning, Foundry won’t run on tablets and phones (not that you should consider those in the first place)
- you need at least an elementary knowledge of Dungeons and Dragons 5th edition - when it comes to the awareness of the rules, I won’t be too harsh, but definitely don’t apply if the first time you’ve seen the PHB was a week ago
- you need TTRPG/roleplay experience and/or a very strong roleplay inclination - this is a heavy roleplay game where most if not all ingame talk will be done in character and where you will be expected to voice your character in a way that is distinct from your standard voice
- you will need to be very punctual when it comes to session attendance - I expect my players to attend most if not all sessions, online or not, this campaign is a designed as a longterm commitment and by applying you are acknowledging this, having other hobbies and time-consuming real-life obligations is understandable (I got those too) but those 4-5 hours you will be expected to set aside for the session
🙋♂️How to sign up🙋♀️
Youve made it all the way to the end of this long post. Congratulations. Or maybe you’ve skipped all the way to the end. In that case I strongly recommended you go back. If not to learn what you are applying for than to make sure you haven’t missed something very important. Now if you are confident that you have what it takes and that this is a game that you could have a lot of fun with, please fill the below attached google questionnaire (if for any strange reason the link doesn’t end up working, please let me know in the comments under this post) and if fortune favors you, I shall get back to you promptly. Best of luck to you and I hope to speak to you soon!https://forms.gle/5kc4RbwavJPfT8PD9
______________________________________
PS: As a part of the questionnaire, you will be asked to submit a short piece of your narrative writing in a form of a google doc link (not a custom piece of writing, any relevant past one you have will do). Maybe best have that ready beforehand? On that note, dont apply for the game with a detailed backstory of a character you want to play that you arent willing to adapt to the conditions of the setting/campaign.
PSS: Not to discourage you but if you do make it through the questionnaire and into the second group of applicants you will be asked to do a discord interview with your webcam turned on. I am asking you to go through a lot for a game you might not even end up liking I know, but if you do end up liking it, all this effort will be well worth it as I am sure my other players would agree.
2024.05.20 16:48 ChampionshipOk5867 My Strange Dreams Part 2
I would heavily suggest reading part 1 before reading this part.
Before I knew it, back in my bed I was, everything was the same as before. Deep Sea Green Fog, mouldy decrepit buildings, a dark moonless night and the millions of eyes, today they were angry at me. I wondered the streets more and tried to interact with the hunched over people, I tried to speak with them, to nudge them but they wouldn’t move or even open their eyes. I check my phone again, this time on the screen reads
“You intrude places where you are forbidden. The Veiless Realm is not for nobody’s like you, wake u-“
I dared not read more. Reading the text on my phone is what made me wake up last night, and I just got up. This dream realm has a name, The Veiless Realm. I walk 7ish minutes down to the gas station near my house and I see the whole place has been replaced by this strange library looking building. I say library LOOKING building because the entire building was glitchy like a TV Screen and I couldn’t seem to comprehend its details. Its door was wide open and a light the same but lighter colour as the fog burst from it, I ran inside and began to move as quietly as I could around the inside, which my brain seemed to be able to comprehend. There were few books here, most I could not make out due to them being glitched like the outside of the building. I skimmed across them all until I found a book that I could read, the book had the title “The Veiless Realm: The Truth”. I could only make that out after I had ripped off all of the tape keeping me from opening the book. A low hum could be heard from the book when I got all the tape off, almost as if I’d released something. The book was quite a challenge to open, the front cover seeming to gain weight to keep me from opening it. I eventually did and the pages burst with a bright light into my face, I kept trying to look at the pages, to make out any words, actively fighting against the beaming light that seemed to be pushing me away from the book. I managed to eventually read a few sentences. They read as such;
“The Veiless Realm is a realm that allows the Eyes Of The Deep One to gaze at the mortals and watch their lives. They actively look with hatred at the churches, mosques and all other places and the people who go there with religious intent. They look in anger because they know they are powerless to stop them. If a mortal were to enter the Veiless Realm, the Deep One would become aggravated, for they are intruding on his land and they may yet learn the truth.”
After I read this, I could not bear to hold the book open anymore and let go, it slammed shut itself. I couldn’t understand, the eyes in the sky were the eyes of The Deep One? They watch me? My life? Everything I do? Why? What for? Then came the whispering, it was like when I looked in the mirror and saw the mouths, but I wasn’t looking in a mirror. I tried to focus on one of the voices and understand what they were saying. They were just chanting “wake up” over and over again. The more I made out the voice the more I couldn’t reverse the decision. Eventually the voices were all screaming at me to wake up. This time, I did.
I was not scared, I was not upset. I was just more curious. I managed to go back last night, and I’m satisfied with what I’ve learned. Maybe tonight, I could uncover more.
submitted by ChampionshipOk5867 to Dreams [link] [comments]
Before I knew it, back in my bed I was, everything was the same as before. Deep Sea Green Fog, mouldy decrepit buildings, a dark moonless night and the millions of eyes, today they were angry at me. I wondered the streets more and tried to interact with the hunched over people, I tried to speak with them, to nudge them but they wouldn’t move or even open their eyes. I check my phone again, this time on the screen reads
“You intrude places where you are forbidden. The Veiless Realm is not for nobody’s like you, wake u-“
I dared not read more. Reading the text on my phone is what made me wake up last night, and I just got up. This dream realm has a name, The Veiless Realm. I walk 7ish minutes down to the gas station near my house and I see the whole place has been replaced by this strange library looking building. I say library LOOKING building because the entire building was glitchy like a TV Screen and I couldn’t seem to comprehend its details. Its door was wide open and a light the same but lighter colour as the fog burst from it, I ran inside and began to move as quietly as I could around the inside, which my brain seemed to be able to comprehend. There were few books here, most I could not make out due to them being glitched like the outside of the building. I skimmed across them all until I found a book that I could read, the book had the title “The Veiless Realm: The Truth”. I could only make that out after I had ripped off all of the tape keeping me from opening the book. A low hum could be heard from the book when I got all the tape off, almost as if I’d released something. The book was quite a challenge to open, the front cover seeming to gain weight to keep me from opening it. I eventually did and the pages burst with a bright light into my face, I kept trying to look at the pages, to make out any words, actively fighting against the beaming light that seemed to be pushing me away from the book. I managed to eventually read a few sentences. They read as such;
“The Veiless Realm is a realm that allows the Eyes Of The Deep One to gaze at the mortals and watch their lives. They actively look with hatred at the churches, mosques and all other places and the people who go there with religious intent. They look in anger because they know they are powerless to stop them. If a mortal were to enter the Veiless Realm, the Deep One would become aggravated, for they are intruding on his land and they may yet learn the truth.”
After I read this, I could not bear to hold the book open anymore and let go, it slammed shut itself. I couldn’t understand, the eyes in the sky were the eyes of The Deep One? They watch me? My life? Everything I do? Why? What for? Then came the whispering, it was like when I looked in the mirror and saw the mouths, but I wasn’t looking in a mirror. I tried to focus on one of the voices and understand what they were saying. They were just chanting “wake up” over and over again. The more I made out the voice the more I couldn’t reverse the decision. Eventually the voices were all screaming at me to wake up. This time, I did.
I was not scared, I was not upset. I was just more curious. I managed to go back last night, and I’m satisfied with what I’ve learned. Maybe tonight, I could uncover more.
2024.05.20 16:39 ResearcherThick2179 JW “Love”
 | I finally reached out to my younger brother (he’s 14 years younger) after months of him ignoring my texts. Here’s his response. It’s interesting to see people like him who have “struggled spiritually” their whole lives “take a stand” as if they are “spiritual giants” now. A year and a half ago over dinner, I told him about some of my current views of not allowing any person dictate my life anymore, thins includes the GB. I could tell this didn’t sit right with him, but he acted like it fine. I was never mean to him nor rejected him for being inactive. I championed him out of love for what I thought was right at that time. Looking back, I regret trying to encourage him over the years using Watchtower publications to prove points and motivate him to keep going in that world. He remembers that now as a good thing and feels it’s what he needs to do for me now. He’s been inactive for years and years.l and I was a super PIMI circuit overseer up until about 2.5 years ago, so I’m sure I’m the epitome of an apostate in his mind now, not that he would dare talk to me about where I actually stand now. It’s all assumptions and fear dictating things, just how the GB gods like it. Bottom line from experiencing this recent development, JW “Love” = “I just threw you away, but know that I love you.” What! Despite this, I am holding him in my heart with love and understanding, hoping he wakes up one day. I might send another text saying “My love is unconditional and I want you in my life now.” Anyway, thanks for reading this! It was cathartic for me to write this. submitted by ResearcherThick2179 to exjw [link] [comments] |
2024.05.20 16:37 SlowAdhesiveness893 AITA for exposing my neighbors husband because he asked me for nudes?
Buckle up, because this is going to be a long one. I'll need to add some context so the story makes sense.
Context: Me (29f) and my husband 'Will' (30m) are currently going through a divorce not related to this story, but this happened during our separation while we were going to therapy to try to work things out. My neighbor's (both mid 40s M and F) have 3 kids 14 M 12F and 5F, and the neighbors are swingers (this is important later) We'll call those two Angie and Jacob. 12F has some mental health issues that is important to the story also, but I will not going into detail with what's wrong.
On to the story: Back in 2021 my husband and I moved into an apartment complex close to my parents because my mom helps me out with my son (8M from previous relationship) a lot since I work from home. I work early in the morning so I would take my dogs out to the park every morning where Jacob would be leaving for work. At the time I didn't know what unit he lived in but we would just exchange a Hello, good morning and be on our ways. In the afternoons, there would be a woman on the second floor smoking overlooking the sidewalk to the dog park with 5F where the little girl would always yell down to me that she loved my dogs. This went on like this for a few weeks. Will, Angie and I finally all met officially one night when she came down and dogs ran up to her. Dogs have a good sense of character and the two of us are always on edge about meeting new people for a number of reasons, and that was the start of our friendship, and when Jacob and I said that we had met already but never talked beyond the good mornings.
We would invite them over for dinner and vice versa. One night, we were all sitting around talking about things, and that's when they told us that they were part of the swinging community. Based on how Will I act and dress, they thought that we were also part but quickly found out we are not. We have friends who are also, but we ourselves talked about it but decided not to pursue it. They were respectful of our choices and never brought it up again. Fast forward a couple of months and a few not super important things happened to bring us all closer as friends including Angie basically saving my life. She found me unresponsive on my bathroom floor with my door unlocked and my son home. (I had knocked on their door earlier to ask Jacob if he or Angie would help me get my son ready for school and he told her go go check on me at some point) I don't remember much about the day but the doctor said I was in really bad shape when the paramedics brought me in. Angie had gotten in to my phone called 911 and my mother and Will to get home due to the situation. From that point on, I put that damn woman on a PEDESTAL. I respected her on such a deep level and saw her as the sister I wish I had. I found myself always spending time with her and her children. I loved them as if they were my own, and I still do so not having contact with them stinks. We all had each other on Facebook, phone numbers and Snapchat.
Now here's where the issues started: In 2023 Will grandmother passed away and then exactly 7 days after my father lost his battle with cancer. This was the catalyst of mine and Wills relationship deteriorating as we were not emotionally available for each other as Will felt that every time he came to me for comfort that I would turn the attention on myself due to my father. I thought we were sharing our grief but I was wrong, and I went to Angie with all my issues. We would sit on her couch for hours and just talk while Jacob was in the other room. My father left me a good sum of money so I paid out the remainder of our lease and my family moved in with my mom to help maintain the house because it was massive. But I would still go over to their apartment all the time. After we sold the house and moved into another across the street from the apartment complex, shit hit the fan and my husband and I started the separation. Now it wasn't uncommon for Jacob to send me things on Snapchat, normally it was videos or pics of their dog or kids. But after I made it known that Will and I were separated, Jacob started paying a little too much attention to me but I was grief strikened Because of the separation and losing my dad in the same year, so ignored most of it. But every time I would have a selfie on my snap story, he would have something to say. Nothing incriminating, but it was all the time. It also wasn't uncommon for me, Angie and Jacob to always hug when saying goodbye or to comfort my grief. I wear a lot of crop tops because I'm comfortable in my body so I'm use to always having a hand on my skin, it doesn't bother me. But what DID bother me is that Jacob would deliberately start getting handsy when I would give him a hug to the point he would put them up the back of my shirt.
That was the moment I started realizing this was not okay. During the time of my separation, they started having issues with their middle child to the point she needed help outside of her parents and had a few stays at a youth facility. I didn't want to add to their issues and I just chalked it up to he just needed comfort also, but I stopped allowing him to hug me after that. At one point I was talking to Angie about a vampire themed boudoir photoshoot I was going to be doing with a friend. For those who don't know, boudoir is a style of dress where we are dressed in lingerie, but mine consist of partial nudity. My friend was female as was the photographer. But I only told this to Angie, however Jacob was home but in his room. A few more weeks go by without much incident from him besides snap messages at inappropriate times of day, like 2 or 3 in the morning. I finally started noticing the red flags. As time went on, he started making more outwardly flirty comments to me, but I would always redirect the conversation back to, ya know, HIS WIFE. But he kept at it with his behavior. I started going over less and less but when I was there I made sure not to be alone with Jacob. I still loved Angie and the kids so I wasn't going to let him ruin that for me. When I finally let me husband know what was going on, because I was handling this all myself, there was a text exchange between me and Jacob where I finally shut down his shitty behavior.
When I got my photos back, they where absolutely BEAUTIFUL. But there was definitely some nudity in them, so very very few people have seen the gallery. Not even Angie had seen them. At this point, Jacob and I had barely spoken. I would leave him on read or not respond to his snaps. He and my son share the same birthday so I did send him a happy birthday message and that was the last thing I had said until he messaged me late at night one day saying he was sad. Immediately I thought something was wrong with his daughter because she was back in the facility, so I responded to him asking what was up. I was wrong about what I thought was up. He said he was sad because he wanted to see the gallery. I finally had enough and proceeded to tell him why he was not allowed to see them and how by asking shows how little he respects his wife on top of how dare he use my separation as an excuse to try to get me into their weird throuple lifestyle, but he basically kept begging me to send him the gallery knowing full well there where nude photos of me and a friend. A few days later, Angie thought she had COVID so I left a rapid test outside and texted both of them, where Jacob responded with yet another flirty comment that ignored once again. What I should have done was tell Angie everything, but I didn't. We were in the PTA together and I wanted to handle the situation as delicately as possible. I started making remarks on how Jacobs behavior was making me uncomfortable and maybe she should talk to him.
Boy did I soon find out that both of these bitches where cray cray. Will had texted Jacob saying he had seen all the messages between me and him and he had until morning to tell Angie everything before he does it himself.Well, this delulu ass man somehow spun the story that I was the one chasing after him and offered to send him the gallery, even though he didn't have any proof of that. This banshee of a woman decided to call Will and go off on him saying how he needs to make me back off of Jacob and stop flirting with with him. Will was obviously confused because I had showed him the text exchange about the photos and how I was never reciprocating his advances while also redirecting the conversations back to his wife. She told Will that the last message there was because us, was the happy birthday message I had sent, but he had deleted everything that followed. Jokes on him, I had my receipts. I already wanted to go no contact so I had blocked them both on everything already, so I strategically took screenshots of our text exchange with the happy birthday message and everything below it, sent them to Will and he texted them too her. Somehow it was still my fault and she even went as far threatening to be at my ass the next time she saw me. Let me tell you that I quit the PTA so fast and removed any mode of contact we had. They still owe me money but the amount I lent them doesn't break the bank so I'd rather cut my losses then take them to small claims court. If I don't see them every again, it would be too soon.
I don't know if I'll ever be able to update this post as I don't know if there was any fallout between the two of them. But I can imagine the damning evidence I had sent Angie's way definitely caused problems. So AITA here, or did I do the right thing by exposing him?
**Edit: I forgot to write this but the only reason I'm writing this out now is because the homeboy tried re-adding me on Snapchat at 4 in the morning 3 days ago
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Context: Me (29f) and my husband 'Will' (30m) are currently going through a divorce not related to this story, but this happened during our separation while we were going to therapy to try to work things out. My neighbor's (both mid 40s M and F) have 3 kids 14 M 12F and 5F, and the neighbors are swingers (this is important later) We'll call those two Angie and Jacob. 12F has some mental health issues that is important to the story also, but I will not going into detail with what's wrong.
On to the story: Back in 2021 my husband and I moved into an apartment complex close to my parents because my mom helps me out with my son (8M from previous relationship) a lot since I work from home. I work early in the morning so I would take my dogs out to the park every morning where Jacob would be leaving for work. At the time I didn't know what unit he lived in but we would just exchange a Hello, good morning and be on our ways. In the afternoons, there would be a woman on the second floor smoking overlooking the sidewalk to the dog park with 5F where the little girl would always yell down to me that she loved my dogs. This went on like this for a few weeks. Will, Angie and I finally all met officially one night when she came down and dogs ran up to her. Dogs have a good sense of character and the two of us are always on edge about meeting new people for a number of reasons, and that was the start of our friendship, and when Jacob and I said that we had met already but never talked beyond the good mornings.
We would invite them over for dinner and vice versa. One night, we were all sitting around talking about things, and that's when they told us that they were part of the swinging community. Based on how Will I act and dress, they thought that we were also part but quickly found out we are not. We have friends who are also, but we ourselves talked about it but decided not to pursue it. They were respectful of our choices and never brought it up again. Fast forward a couple of months and a few not super important things happened to bring us all closer as friends including Angie basically saving my life. She found me unresponsive on my bathroom floor with my door unlocked and my son home. (I had knocked on their door earlier to ask Jacob if he or Angie would help me get my son ready for school and he told her go go check on me at some point) I don't remember much about the day but the doctor said I was in really bad shape when the paramedics brought me in. Angie had gotten in to my phone called 911 and my mother and Will to get home due to the situation. From that point on, I put that damn woman on a PEDESTAL. I respected her on such a deep level and saw her as the sister I wish I had. I found myself always spending time with her and her children. I loved them as if they were my own, and I still do so not having contact with them stinks. We all had each other on Facebook, phone numbers and Snapchat.
Now here's where the issues started: In 2023 Will grandmother passed away and then exactly 7 days after my father lost his battle with cancer. This was the catalyst of mine and Wills relationship deteriorating as we were not emotionally available for each other as Will felt that every time he came to me for comfort that I would turn the attention on myself due to my father. I thought we were sharing our grief but I was wrong, and I went to Angie with all my issues. We would sit on her couch for hours and just talk while Jacob was in the other room. My father left me a good sum of money so I paid out the remainder of our lease and my family moved in with my mom to help maintain the house because it was massive. But I would still go over to their apartment all the time. After we sold the house and moved into another across the street from the apartment complex, shit hit the fan and my husband and I started the separation. Now it wasn't uncommon for Jacob to send me things on Snapchat, normally it was videos or pics of their dog or kids. But after I made it known that Will and I were separated, Jacob started paying a little too much attention to me but I was grief strikened Because of the separation and losing my dad in the same year, so ignored most of it. But every time I would have a selfie on my snap story, he would have something to say. Nothing incriminating, but it was all the time. It also wasn't uncommon for me, Angie and Jacob to always hug when saying goodbye or to comfort my grief. I wear a lot of crop tops because I'm comfortable in my body so I'm use to always having a hand on my skin, it doesn't bother me. But what DID bother me is that Jacob would deliberately start getting handsy when I would give him a hug to the point he would put them up the back of my shirt.
That was the moment I started realizing this was not okay. During the time of my separation, they started having issues with their middle child to the point she needed help outside of her parents and had a few stays at a youth facility. I didn't want to add to their issues and I just chalked it up to he just needed comfort also, but I stopped allowing him to hug me after that. At one point I was talking to Angie about a vampire themed boudoir photoshoot I was going to be doing with a friend. For those who don't know, boudoir is a style of dress where we are dressed in lingerie, but mine consist of partial nudity. My friend was female as was the photographer. But I only told this to Angie, however Jacob was home but in his room. A few more weeks go by without much incident from him besides snap messages at inappropriate times of day, like 2 or 3 in the morning. I finally started noticing the red flags. As time went on, he started making more outwardly flirty comments to me, but I would always redirect the conversation back to, ya know, HIS WIFE. But he kept at it with his behavior. I started going over less and less but when I was there I made sure not to be alone with Jacob. I still loved Angie and the kids so I wasn't going to let him ruin that for me. When I finally let me husband know what was going on, because I was handling this all myself, there was a text exchange between me and Jacob where I finally shut down his shitty behavior.
When I got my photos back, they where absolutely BEAUTIFUL. But there was definitely some nudity in them, so very very few people have seen the gallery. Not even Angie had seen them. At this point, Jacob and I had barely spoken. I would leave him on read or not respond to his snaps. He and my son share the same birthday so I did send him a happy birthday message and that was the last thing I had said until he messaged me late at night one day saying he was sad. Immediately I thought something was wrong with his daughter because she was back in the facility, so I responded to him asking what was up. I was wrong about what I thought was up. He said he was sad because he wanted to see the gallery. I finally had enough and proceeded to tell him why he was not allowed to see them and how by asking shows how little he respects his wife on top of how dare he use my separation as an excuse to try to get me into their weird throuple lifestyle, but he basically kept begging me to send him the gallery knowing full well there where nude photos of me and a friend. A few days later, Angie thought she had COVID so I left a rapid test outside and texted both of them, where Jacob responded with yet another flirty comment that ignored once again. What I should have done was tell Angie everything, but I didn't. We were in the PTA together and I wanted to handle the situation as delicately as possible. I started making remarks on how Jacobs behavior was making me uncomfortable and maybe she should talk to him.
Boy did I soon find out that both of these bitches where cray cray. Will had texted Jacob saying he had seen all the messages between me and him and he had until morning to tell Angie everything before he does it himself.Well, this delulu ass man somehow spun the story that I was the one chasing after him and offered to send him the gallery, even though he didn't have any proof of that. This banshee of a woman decided to call Will and go off on him saying how he needs to make me back off of Jacob and stop flirting with with him. Will was obviously confused because I had showed him the text exchange about the photos and how I was never reciprocating his advances while also redirecting the conversations back to his wife. She told Will that the last message there was because us, was the happy birthday message I had sent, but he had deleted everything that followed. Jokes on him, I had my receipts. I already wanted to go no contact so I had blocked them both on everything already, so I strategically took screenshots of our text exchange with the happy birthday message and everything below it, sent them to Will and he texted them too her. Somehow it was still my fault and she even went as far threatening to be at my ass the next time she saw me. Let me tell you that I quit the PTA so fast and removed any mode of contact we had. They still owe me money but the amount I lent them doesn't break the bank so I'd rather cut my losses then take them to small claims court. If I don't see them every again, it would be too soon.
I don't know if I'll ever be able to update this post as I don't know if there was any fallout between the two of them. But I can imagine the damning evidence I had sent Angie's way definitely caused problems. So AITA here, or did I do the right thing by exposing him?
**Edit: I forgot to write this but the only reason I'm writing this out now is because the homeboy tried re-adding me on Snapchat at 4 in the morning 3 days ago
2024.05.20 16:33 Train_Lover2006 Advice Please!
This will be a long one. So I (17m) met this girl (17 f) let’s call her “Gwen”. For context Gwen lives 2 1/2 hours a way. Gwen and I met a at a convention about 2 years ago we talked on and off until recently. For reference at this event I got her snap and phone number when we met. This summer out of the blue she sent me a snap that said, “I really like you.” So I opened this message on my 5 minute break at work. Now at this point I asked her if we could talk about it after I got off of work. So not even 10 minutes after I sent that she told me that her friends dared her to do that? Now at the time I had extreme anxiety (better and medicated now) and she apologized and I kinda blew her off. Not my best move I know now in retrospect. Now at this point (late October 2023) I texted Gwen like we used to before the incident that happened over the summer.(never talked about it since) Now we talk almost daily, but I’m the one who initiates the conversation. Since texting and snapping almost daily. I have called and talked on the phone once and we went were at a party together. I think I’m the one that has a crush on her. So what do I do now? I’m not the best texter and I don’t want to ruin the friendship but I think I really like her.
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