Good night letter to your boyfriend

Hi everyone, this may turn into a long post as I write this out and (admittedly) vent some frustrations I currently have (sorry in advance if that's not allowed).
To start off, between my SO and I we have 2 dogs, 3 cats, and a bunny. Someone at work stated a family member of theirs couldn't hold on to their two cats, so they were looking to re-home them, or they be sent off to the shelter by the end of last week. I felt bad, as I wouldn't want to give up my animals if I was put in the position that this person is in (basically they moved, but due to certain life events they had to move in with their parents who said no to the cats). So I offered to hold on to them so they wouldn't end up in the shelter, and they would be returned to their owner once they find a place they can stay at that will allow them to have cats.
The issue at hand is that my GF really doesn't want them here, claiming they could have some issue like a disease or something, which to q degree is understandable, but I'm keeping them separated from our other animals for the time being (even though the owner has stated they are healthy and is trying to send paperwork). She stated she also feels disrespected (more on this further down) that I would go forward with this without her approval (I did mention a few times about the cats, so it wasn't completely out of the blue). As such, she is threatening to break up with me over this if they are not removed from the home (she's also threatened throwing them outside and making them street cats, which obviously isn't good).
I'm upset that I'm trying to be a good person but am being forced to not be allowed to do so (I figured since we already have 3 cats, what's 2 more for some time, considering cats are low effort in my opinion).
Now for some juicy details that you redditors may enjoy reading. As I've stated earlier, she feels disrespected that I would move forward with this decision, without talking to her more about it. I honestly didn't think it would be a big issue since we both love animals. Growing up, whenever I visit my home country, if there was an animal that needed to take care of, I'd end up giving away a good portion of my vacation looking after said animal. And if I couldn't look after it for some time for whatever reason, a portion of my mind was constantly preoccupied wondering if they were ok. For my gf, as an example, she guilt trip me into taking in a pet rat that we we unprepared to take in (this was the only reason why I was against it, as neither of us had the money to buy a proper enclosure), as she was concerned that someone would end up buying it as snake food. This obviously made me feel bad, and we ended up getting the rat (ended up passing away, so it's currently not in the picture). She's has also stated that she wanted chickens, which I also don't mind, as roosters crowing and hens clucking remind me of my grandparents' farm. I'm hesitant on that only because I'd need to put in the time, energy, and money into making an enclosure for them (can't just have them running around in the backyard). So you can see why I thought she wouldn't mind looking after 2 cats who we are indirectly ready to take in due to having our cats. I have my suspicions thay she's jealous/insecure about it being another female's cats, as she asked a question or two about the scenario that in my opinion didn't pertain to the cats directly (more on this layer)
The issue I have with her claiming she feels disrespected is I feel like I bend over backwards for her, while also letting her walk all over me, to the point where she claimed I have/had sex with my mom (she did not say this directly to me, she stated it to certain family members who have relayed it back to me) which such a thing has never occurred. She also believes I have done something to the our animals. The first time she stated that if she found out I ever did something to the animals, she'd find someplace to go and take all the animals and I'd never find her. Another time my dog was pooping, and she asked why his rectum looked like that (again, pretty much claiming I did something to my dog). The most recent claim she's made is I went out to walk my dog, and ended up talking to one of our "neighbors" (they live behind the house that's directly across the street from us) and I admittedly stayed for a very long time. She tried calling me, but my phone was on silent for some reason, and I ended up missing her call. She sent me a few messages, the first 2 claiming she was going to call the police and file a missing person report (understandable considering how long I've been gone, and the fact it was around 11 at night), but then the following messages claimed she hopes my dog doesn't come back raped, and the message after that asked if I was "getting fucked by Dan" (I don't even a Dan where we live). She's also claimed I did something to her dog, as she thought her puppy looked prolapsed during her period. So as you can see, there's been a lot of claims by her of me supposedly sodomizing the animals which I want to make clear has not happened.
To make matters worse, and possibly the cherry on top, she claims to have taken some photos that pertain to me that she claims she will post online if we ever break up so people know the real me (I won't get into too much detail, but it is of a sexual nature that luckily doesn't have me directly in it, but nonetheless wouldn't be a good thing to be put online if she goes through with it). I haven't seen these photos directly, but I'm going to assume the worse and believe they exist. I believe this falls under the category of blackmail, bit I'm not sure, as she hasn't used it as leverage to get me to buy her things or do things for her, etc.
I'll admit that I maybe haven't been her perfect boyfriend. I did try however I could, even going above my means to try to please her, which I am am now literally paying for (something I'm currently working on). I also will admit that I have spoken about her to my family members behind her back, although they claim that I'm not speaking ill of her if what she does/says is true (they have witnessed how she is first hand, so they know I'm not talking out my ass about certain things). Am I crazy/in the wrong to think "the audacity of the bitch" when she says she feels disrespected, when she has claimed all the things above?
For some chocolate drizzle: I had a surgery a few months back that I was healing from, and I was laying in the bath tub letting the shower head hit me, just trying to relax a bit, when she comes into the bath to rinse off her dirty feet almost right above my incision (it was basically an open wound with some glue over it).
This is all excluding the constant accusations I get from her about cheating on her. She wants access to my phone (I have somehow managed to stick to my giluns and not give it to her) and I have shown her my text messages a handful of times, and she never finds anything because, well, I'm not cheating on her. I'll admit that I have some sensitive information on my phone that I don't want her to have access to the primary one being bank accounts, and I don't want her seeing my degeneracy on reddit (thank you anonymous browsing lol)
That's it for now. Again, sorry for the long post that turned into a venting/advice session. I have the right of mind to either move into an apartment by myself for some time and letting her figure out what to with her animals and try to get away from this mess. Or better yet, let her be mad over the cats, and break up with me for wanting to help someone out, and potentially take her to the cleaners legally if she goes through with posting the photos about me. I don't want to take legal action against her and potentially ruin her future, as I understand she hasn't had the best life growing up, but I'm also tired of letting her get away with whatever she wants.

(enligh is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes)
I (25F) have been with my boyfriend (25M) for about 8years now. We are going to get married soon and have bought a house a few months ago to start our life together. He has some friends that are my friends too (they said they consider me their friend, not their friend's girlfriend, but I don't feel like it's totaly true) and sometimes, when we invite 1 friend to our house (It doesn't matter which one), he makes some cruel jokes about me, but not always, the problem is when we invite two or more friend together, as they seem to make me always the butt of the joke and sometimes with very personal, hurtful stuff. They always do It in front of my boyfriend and he never sais anything to them.
Examples: they have said that I dress like a cheap wh**e (I use dresses that are tight, but they are appropiate, they don't even show anything), that I have below average inteligence (even if I have graduated with honors in my university and I used to feel proud of that), that I don't shut up (I'm very talkative and when there's a silence I feel the responsability to fill it Up; they don't talk much and they have told me that sometimes they come to listen to me bc it's entretaining), that the house is not even mine (I earn much less that my boyfriend now because I'm working part time to continue srudying), that my job is not a real one. All of this was in one night.
All of this was unprovoked, since I never say mean thing to them. I have anxiety and I feel intimidated being surrounded by men so in the moment usually I don't know how to defend myself and I just tell them that that's mean and that I haven't done anything bad to deserve it but they ignore It. Also, they treat me like that together but then, when they have a problem and need emotional support they don't talk to eachother, they tell me and when I give them support they never thank me bc they see It as giving me "gossip", so it's like they are doing a good thing for me and not the other way around.
I don't understand why they are like this to me. When one of them IS feeling down I support them, I tell them to come and I but snacks they like to brighten their day a little or I compliment them to make them feel more confindent. And whenever they come and they go home I'm left feeling like shit and I cry because they just to my house, they treat my like shit in front of my boyfriend and they go feeling cheerfull.
My boyfriend has social anxiety and I'm the one that has helped him to make and maintain friendships, I'm the one Who encourages him to meet Up with his Friends and all. After all of this happens he always tells me either that he didn't hear the mean comenta or that he did but since he has anxiety he doesn't know what to say.
I get It, I have anxiety too, but I feel I would NEVER let my friends treat him like that (which they have never done).
Am I to hard on him because I tell him that he should defend me even if he has social anxiety?

I’ve literally never made a post on Reddit before, but I have to get this out because I adore this show. I’m rewatching and I’m on season 3. The intro in the first episode is brilliant. BUT when Miranda and Carrie get invited to Scouts opening, and we learn that Aiden is a “silent partner,” Carrie asks Miranda if she ever thinks she still has feelings for Steve and Miranda says no. Then Carrie is asked the same about Aiden and she also says no. Sure she may have been lying, but why lie to your best friend, especially Miranda. At the bar opening, we can see Aiden doesn’t want anything to do with her but then feeds her cake? That felt so out of place. Carrie brings it up at one of their girls brunch that she wants him back and Samantha literally says that Aiden is not her type. Miranda also pushes back and says you just said you don’t miss him. Why didn’t Carrie pause and listen to the people how know her best? When she is trying so hard to get him she goes CRAZY. Like berating him about not answering her random email. What made me the most upset about this whole thing is how manipulative she is towards him. She throws rocks at his window after he said he didn’t want a relationship. Then he gets mad and yells “you broke my heart!!” And what does she do? RUN away making Aiden feel bad for his own feelings. When they finally do get back together she talks to him like ………a child? Or something. Saying he’s such a good boyfriend over and over. It feels desperate and forced. Then the whole thing with the bartender at Scouts and how Aiden is very clearly flirting with her.
Ugh the whole thing is cringe and frustrating that they both couldn’t see how they are NOT meant to be. And that’s just the beginning. We know how catastrophic it later becomes. It’s truly my least favorite version of Carrie. She is so mean to him.

(Please excuse my grammar, english isn’t my first language)
So we’ve been friends since Elementary and moved schools a year after becoming friends, although we still kept contact despite us being in different schools. And we sorta reconnected again during first year high school, and we bonded again with each other and shit.
But despite all those years of friendship & stuff, I’m getting tired of her attitude at times, like when I’m ranting to her about something she’ll literally ignore my rants or either just say something like “Same” “So true” and then proceed to insert her bf into the convo. AND I REALLY DGAF ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND. I just need someone I can rant to and my feelings get invalidated. She also always finds a way to make it seem like she was the “victim” in a certain situation when she really isn’t.
Honestly my feelings get invalidated like half the time through the years of friendship with her, it’s like my feelings doesn’t matter, and hers is. Every time she’d rant to me, I literally give her advice and shit and most times she can’t really reciprocate the action ‘cause she would change topics SO fast.
Also, every good thing she’d done she’ll always find a way to reprimand it. It’s like she’s making the friendship look one sided and that I’d never done something good for her at all. I always lower my pride for her, and sacrificed a lot for her too. And now that we’re in a conflict, she’s sort of using it against me.
I don’t know how she does it but I swear she always finds herself in the spotlight, not in a good way no. She always has a new issue with our classmates, its been like that since last year and I’m getting sick of it. Because she always involves other people in her problem just to run away from it. (I am other people, really tho.) And this year I have the feeling she’s running away yet from another issue of hers and throwing HER responsibilities to me. She’d always excuse she’s sick, you get sick this much or just when you have an issue going on?
Now when I went to clear up my name she suddenly got angry at me (and our other friends) and shifted the blame to us, when no one literally instructed her to do that shit, we were simply just ranting and she decided suddenly she wants to save the day woohoo 🤓, when in reality she couldn’t handle all that shit and we were the ones who catched her responsibilities, defended her. But when we really can’t handle her shit anymore and just silently decided to avoid her a bit, she went ahead and made a big deal out of it. (It may seem like that to her but i swear to god every time you’d explain something to her she’ll get angry and will probably bring up all the good deeds she’d done and she’ll make herself the victim once again.) I’m also adding the fact that I was kind of part of the act she did (snitched) but my conscience couldn’t do it anymore because I kept lying just for the sake her name is clean. I could not focus on anything the whole week while she was having fun and she won’t listen to my rants of me not wanting to lie anymore, and kept pushing we can still do it when it’s so clear I couldn’t anymore?
I literally don’t know anymore, being friends with her drains the shit out of me. I’m saying like hanging out with her is fun, but her personality and attitude? Your entire will to live will be drained after a day of hanging out w her. It’s emotionally draining to be honest.

I think a lot about signals. Signals that show people what groups they belong to. Signals that hide the truth. Everybody uses signals to blend, entice, or trap.
Grandma Pearl died not long after her stroke, and I've been making bad decisions ever since. Maybe my expectations are too high, or I'm just an idiot. Either way, I ran away from the group home to be with people who called themselves my "family." They were the wrong people. They used the words family, brother, sister, and love like lock picks, stealing trust, and taking self-respect.
The only person I remember using the word family correctly was Grandma Pearl. She was a small woman who toured the US as an actress before settling with Granddad above their theatrical rentals shop. I was three when the car accident took Granddad and Mom, so I don't know if they used the word "family" correctly, but I hope they did.
I was never as outgoing as Grandma, but that didn't bother her; she taught me how to watch people. How to see their signals, and how to listen. When she died. I forgot a lot of those lessons for a while.
They called it a "family". The "family" moved product. That product could be goods, drugs, or people.
The uninitiated, like me, were distracted with food and a dry place to sleep, but it didn't take long to see behind the curtain. Things got too intense with the new "family" and I ran.
I ran back to my old neighborhood. The buildings were familiar even if my home was gone. The old theatrical shop had been turned into a microbrewery.
After an appropriate amount of self-pity, thirty minutes, I wandered the alleys, picking up cans or scavenging for bits and pieces that could be recycled, used, or bartered.
I recognized old faces, but I tried to stay out of sight. It was safer that way.
The only place I allowed myself to be seen was the old Lutheran church on the park's far side. Most people who might have known me had aged out of the congregation or died. It was worth the risk because St. Lazarus had a food pantry in the basement and gave out lunches most days, so I wasn't always hungry, which was nice.
I found a dry spot near the library to sleep, which seemed like a stroke of luck until it wasn't.
I had the contentment that came with being in a familiar place. Little bits of comfort let me believe, for a moment, that I wasn't a screw-up and hadn't trusted the wrong people. That moment scurried away when Stick found me.
Stick was a scary asshole. He technically wasn't in charge of the " family," but he made it work. He got things done. I have no idea how old he was. He was all corded muscle and could clock in between twenty and fifty. He looked half-starved and moved like a stalking predator, even with his limp.
His left leg was stiff. The knee didn't bend, and anytime he sat, his left leg would be splayed to the side like a kickstand on a bike. The leg was why he walked with a cane. The cane and how he used it was why we called him Stick.
I don't know why he took the time to track me down. It's not like I was wanted. Maybe it was that I had become property. Property shouldn't just wander off.
Sometimes, you feel a person before you see them. The air is different. When Stick was around, the air felt dead and motionless. I knew I was being watched before I opened my eyes.
Stick was sitting on a milk crate, his bad leg cocked to the side and his forehead resting on his cane. I pushed myself out from beneath the ductwork of the HVAC unit I had been sleeping under and slapped the dirt off my jeans.
"I thought that was you," Stick said as his sharp grin curved up to his unblinking dark eyes.
Stick wanted my discomfort. I'd seen him play the intimidation game too many times. He'd act too friendly, and then when you were good and worried, quick movements, a hand around the back of your neck, and violence would be next. Then he'd act like the whole mind fuck was a big joke, like you were friends, and isn't it great that you can joke around with someone who "really" cared.
It worked, too. If you were the unfortunate focus of Stick's attention, you would be grateful when he smiled and said, "Just a joke, kid. Don't be so sensitive." I'd seen the pattern enough times to know Stick trained people like dogs with his hot and cold game. I didn't like the game, or the fear, so I changed the pattern.
"Hey, Stick, did you come to help pick up cans?" I asked, making sure my smile reached my eyes. I was trying to be pleasant while ignoring the burning nervousness in my gut.
It was still dark out, but I could see Stick's expressions well enough.
Stick tapped his cane on the sidewalk and squinted at me skeptically before answering. "Just checking on my little brother."
We were not related.
Stick liked to call the uninitiated his little brothers or little sisters. He forced intimacy into his language. I didn't argue the point. Interactions went best with Stick when you agreed with everything he said.
"Thanks, man," I complimented, trying to sound genuine and ignorant as I stepped forward and offered him my hand.
Stick didn't move, but I could see that this conversation wasn't going as planned for him, and I forced myself not to react to his confusion. I couldn't break character, or he would know I was playing him.
Stick tapped his cane on the ground twice, grasped my hand, and stood. He watched me. I held his stare, but in an open, naive, guileless way that I had perfected in front of the mirror as grandma gave acting advice while she put her face on.
I once asked Grandma Perl why anyone would practice acting stupid. She pointed her mascara brush at me and, in her ditsiest Minnesota Nice character, said, "It's easier to be forgiven when people think you're a little dumb, don't ya know?" Like with most things, Grandma was right.
Before I understood what had happened, Stick pulled me into his side and slung an arm around my shoulder.
"You don't have a name yet. Everyone gets a name, but they don't get to pick it." He paused and gave me a Cheshire cat grin. "I have a name for you, little brother. You are going to be called Slide." Then he held my chin and forced eye contact." Your name will be Slide because I have never seen anyone slide out of shit faster than you. I can't tell if you do it on purpose or not, and I've been watching. I watch everybody. You do, too. Hell, this might be the first time I've ever heard you talk. So let's celebrate your name, Slide." Stick's smile slipped as he pulled me out of the alley. "We'll go do something special."
I stayed silent, knowing full well what was coming. Being named meant doing something you could never take back. It was public and would put you in prison if the police ever took the time to look for you. It meant severing yourself from your life before and relying entirely on the "family." I had been absent each time naming seemed to be in the cards, but I couldn't duck out this time.
There was only one place to go at this time of night that would have an impact, the Bodega.
The Bodega was a red hole in the wall with a glass door papered over with grocery ads years outdated. Canned salmon two for one seemed to be the dominant theme. Although there were two large windows, one on either side of the door, you could barely see in. The right window was a tapestry of cigarette promotions. The left window displayed the only swath of uncovered glass with a view of the interior. From the outside, the view was of tobacco, lottery scratchers, and Old Lady Imitari.
Old Lady Imitari owned the store. She was a short, dark-haired woman who always wore a long floral tank top. Grandma Pearl loved the old woman but said Imitari looked like an old man's thumb all the years she had known her, and Grandma moved to the neighborhood with Grandad thirty years ago. Imitari was a local legend even then because the Bodega was open twenty hours a day, three hundred sixty-five days a year, and no one else worked in the store. Grandma used to make an extra strong coffee called Barako and chat with Imitari sometimes when work in the shop was slow.
I would sneak out at night and try to catch Imitari sleeping. No matter the time, I never caught her snoozing, and she always saw me peeking at her through the window. I know she saw me because she would uncross her arms and wave her flyswatter at me.
All these memories flicked through my mind as Stick smiled his too-wide smile and pushed me into the Bodega.
Imitari flicked her fly swatter at me in acknowledgment, and her attention returned to the small TV she had nestled beside the cash register, which seemed to be the old woman's only real tether to the world outside her shop.
The inside of the Bodega was just a long hallway with shelves of convenience foods, drinks, home supplies, candy, and cold meds covering every available surface from floor to ceiling. The only break in the tunnel of products was the glass counter at the back corner of the store; Imitari presided over her mini domain by casually ignoring her shoppers. I tried to make eye contact with the old woman again as Stick pushed me to the back of the shop, but after her initial acknowledgment of our entrance, Imitari's eyes stayed focused on her TV.
As casually confident as possible, I walked to the cooler and grabbed an iced tea. "Want a drink," I asked over my shoulder, my voice unusually steady, given the electric current of anxiety flowing through me.
Stick sneered and tapped his cane twice on the ground. His eyes found all the security cameras in the tiny store, a frown creasing his angular features.
I followed his line of sight and finally realized what had bothered him. The cameras were fake. They looked like security cameras, but they weren't. There were no wires or lenses, just rectangles and circles in a security camera shape.
Stick took a deep breath and tapped his cane on the ground again. " There… is … so… much… here… to… see… but… no… one… is… watching," he said with a singsong. Then his sneer turned into a cruel smile.
I knew Stick wanted an audience for what he would force me to do. The fact that the security cameras were fakes meant that whatever was going to happen would now have to be significant. An event that the neighborhood wouldn't be able to ignore. My stomach twisted with the thought.
Stick waggled his eyebrows at me. He had been watching. He had seen my thoughts, and we both knew he had something terrible in mind.
The cane twirled in Stick's hand and then tapped twice on the shop tile.
"I think I want a little bit of this," Stick said, gesturing wildly with his cane, sending a row of soup cans tumbling to the floor. "And a little bit of that," Stick added as another wild gesture sent cups of ramen spinning and knocking glass bottles of hot sauce to the floor.
I stood paralyzed, unable to run. I was trapped with nowhere to duck away to. I didn't want Stick to hurt Old Lady Imitari, and I didn't want Stick to hurt me, either. The truth was, he would hurt both of us no matter what I did. That was just the way Stick was. I'd seen him. I'd seen him show us who he was every day.
Then I realized Imitari hadn't moved. She was watching her TV and chuckling at the sitcom as if nothing had happened.
Stick glanced at me, confused. I almost felt sorry for the sociopath. His night was not going to plan.
Imitari chuckled at her TV again, and a crease formed in the middle of Stick's forehead, letting me know that he was beyond angry. He was calm, dangerous, and vicious. People had been left for dead when Stick got this way.
Stick raised his cane and flipped it so the handle jutted like a pickax. He was going to attack Imitari.
Somehow, I moved. I didn't do much, but when I slid forward and grabbed the back of Stick's shirt, the cane missed Imitari, and the sharp handle punctured the thick glass top of the counter just above a roll of Lotto scratchers.
Old lady Imitari slowly looked up into Stick's eyes and smiled. Her wide, gentle frown was replaced with a look of joy and something else, something primal, something hungry. Her pupils were blown, and I had the uneasy feeling that I was watching someone be served their absolute favorite meal.
Before Stick could pull his cane from the punctured glass, Imitari casually reached forward, grabbed the cane, and pulled the wirey man forward. Small, old, and wrinkled, Imitari stared into Stick's eyes and overpowered him.
Stick fell forward across the counter. He tried to push himself back, but Imitari's hand clamped down on his wrist like a vice.
Bones ground together as Imitari pulled Stick's hand to her mouth, and with a swift, subtle movement, she bit off the tips of Stick's pinky and ring finger like she was sampling a cookie.
I jumped back next to the cooler as a thin spray of blood arched toward me.
Stick screamed and thrashed, but Imitari's small form was static and immovable. Stick was a fly in a trap. No matter how much he struggled, punched, poked, or kicked, he could not break the old woman's hold. Then, slowly, she took another bite.
It was strangely fascinating watching the frail form of this old woman I had known for years take bite after bite out of Stick. This man, whom I thought of as a predator, a hunter, an enforcer, was crying and begging while an old woman, who looked like a wrinkled thumb in a floral top, quietly devoured him.
I was surprised by the lack of blood after the first spray. I'm sure it was Imitari's crushing grip that stanched the flow of blood. The flesh of Stick's arm looked white from the pressure.
Hand over hand, Imitari pulled Stick forward. Bones cracked as she gripped higher on Stick's arm, clamped down with her long leathery fingers, and fed the flesh and bone, one concise bite at a time, into her open smiling maw. It was rhythmical in its simplicity: chomp, crunch, chew, chew, swallow. Over and over, the pattern continued until the begging stopped.
Stick wasn't dead. He gave up. Not struggling, he laid over the glass counter like a rag doll. He watched me glassily as Imitari took bite after bite, and I knew he wasn't there anymore. Whatever made Stick Stick had either curled up and hidden in a dark corner of his mind or had been devoured with his arm.
The old woman seemed displeased that her meal had stopped struggling. She shook him, but he flopped, and his head lulled from side to side. Imitari frowned, let go of Stick's arm, and pushed down on the limp man's back. Blood gushed from the ragged stump, and Imitari lowered her mouth and drank from the wound like she was sipping from a garden hose.
Stick didn't move. He just grew pail, and eventually, his panicked, shallow breaths ended, and the blood stopped flowing.
Then Imitari stood. With a quick tug, she pulled Stick's body over the counter and let it flop to the floor at her feet. Her eyes closed. A contented smile bloomed on her face as the explosive sound of crunching and cracking bones echoed through the small shop.
The deafening sound of crunching stopped, and only the buzzing of the drinks cooler reverberated through the small space. Imitari opened her eyes and watched me, a broad smile still on her lips. At that moment, I realized I could hear the drinks cooler so well because I had crawled into it, wedged between the glass door and the shelves.
Imitari held me with her gaze as cords of pink flesh lowered from the ceiling and efficiently tidied up Stick's mess, lapping up blood and hot sauce, placing cans on shelves, and scooping up cups of ramen with whip-like tendrils. Then, the cords of flesh nudged me forward, and I stood before Old Lady Imitari.
The thing that I had always thought of as a stern old woman handed me Stick's cane. With the same benign smile I remembered from buying red hots from it as a ten-year-old, it waved me away with its flyswatter, and the cords of flesh pushed me out the door onto the sidewalk.

THE 2000 YEAR OLD MAN (1975) - FULL TRANSCRIPT 2000 Year Old Man is an old Brooks-Reiner comedy routine turned into a half-hour animated TV special. Reiner, a TV reporter, interviews Brooks, a man claiming to be 2000 years old. The interview consists of a serious of questions regarding the history of the world. Brooks' answers to Reiner's questions are priceless.
About four days ago a plane landed at Idlewild Airport.
The plane came from the Middle East bearing a man who claims to be
2000 years old.
He spent the last six days at the Mayo Clinic.
Ei, sir.
Sir, is it true that you are 2000 years old?
Oh boy.
-Yes. -You are?
It's hard to believe sir because
in the history of man nobody has ever lived more than 167 years
wich a man from Peru claimed to be.
But you claim to be 2000?
I'll be, not yet. I'll be 2000, October 16th.
You will be 2000. When were you born?
We didn't have formal years and names and writing.
We didn't know. I see.
Nobody kept time.
See, we didn't know.
We didn't write. We just sat around, pointed in the sky
and said wow hot there wow.
-That's all they said? -We didn't even know it was the sun.
You really didn't know anything.
Anything, we were so dumb.
We didn't know who was a lady.
-But they were... -They were with us.
But we didn't know who they was
we didn't know who was the ladies and who was fellows.
You thought they were just different type of fellows.
Yes, stronger or smaller or softer.
The softer ones I think was the ladies all the time.
What about that? How did you find out?
Well, they are cute, a fat guy,
could you could have mistaken him,
soft and cute.
Who is the person who discovered the female?
Bernie.
Who was Bernie?
Bernie, one of the first leaders of our group.

• And he discovered the female?
• Yeah.
  
• How did that happen?
  
• Ladies, ladies here.
  

I'm very interested to find out how Bernie discovered the woman.
-Well, he... -How did he come to find?
One morning
he got up smiling. So he said:
I think there is ladys here.
I said, well, what do you mean, you know?
He said: 'cause in the night.
I was swelled and delighted, see?
So he went into such a story that
it's hundreds of years later, I still blush.
Could you give us the secret of your longevity?
Well, the major thing.
The major thing.
Is that I never, ever touch ripe food.
I don't eat it.
I wouldn't look at it and I don't touch it.
And and I never run for a bus.
There's always another.
Even if even if you're late for work.
You know, I never run for a bus.
I never ran.
I just stroll, jump it, slowly walk to the next bus...
Yeah, well but there were no buses at the time.

• No, in my... -Right.

In my time ahnn...
What was the means of transportation then?
-Mostly fear.
-Fear transported you? -Fear yes.
You could see.
A lion, he would would growl, you would go two miles a minute.
I'd like to find out about some social customs
the origination of social customs.
For instance, singing how that started?
Oh it stems from fear.
-Could you explain? -Because in the old days,
I said old days.
I don't mean the georgian cars.
-Did you.. -I mean rocks and caves...
I'm asking you, sir, how song...
Some song came about when you really had to communicate.
-But in trouble you couldn't say help. -Yes.
But have to use your mouth.
Yes, I know.
Hello.
-I mean, I wouldn't say help, I say good morning.
Yes. You're really...
you know you in trouble.

• But somebody said eeeh eeeeh. -That was the first song.
  
• I don't know.
  
• In other words, fear, right?
  

I was singing.
We thought happiness did.
Oh, and the song came out of it.
A lion is eating my foot off.
Somebody call a cop.
A lion is eating my foot off.
Somebody call a cop.
A lion is eating my foot off.
Somebody call a cop.
A lion is eating my foot of
Somebody call a cop.
Very interesting to hear the derivation of songs
The first songs,
the first songs were all the anthem songs.
We always thought...
We always thought...
Wanna hear an anthem song?
You had an anthem song?
We had a national anthem.
-What was the anthem? -Well, ah...
you see, was only fragment...
-Fragment? -It wasn't a nation.
-Yes. -It was cave, each cave. Yes.
Each cave had a national anthem.
You remember the national anthem of your cave?
Ok. I say I'll never forget it.
You don't forget a national anthem in a minute.
Let them go to the hell
except cave 76.
For instance, how did the custom of two people shaking hands
how the handshake come to be?
The handshake? As you know...
I don't, that's why I'm asking!
The handshake has also stemmed from fear.

• Everything seems to stem from fear.
• Of course.

Everything we do is based on fear.
-Even love? -Mainly love.
How can love stem from fear?
How can love stem from fear?
What do you need a woman for?
You know what you need for?
-In my time? -Yes.
To see if an animal is behind yourself,
you had to get eyes in the back of your head.
you take two eyes that is to be a lady.
I see.
You say, lady, you look behind me for a while.
And that was the first... the first marriages.
What if you take a look behind me ok?
How long you want?Forever, we are married.
You walked back to back to the rest of your life?
Yes. You only look at her once in a while,
when you knew you it was safe?
When I knew I was in a highground.
-The handshakes they started how?
-They started to see if the fellow had a rock
or a dagger in his hand.
Where is you hand? Hi, Charlie.
How you're doing Jumpy, where is you hand?
Then you open it and you look...
And you shook another one.
And that's the way the handshakes started.
Yes, the shake.
May have a stone or a marble to stick in your eye.
In the older days
you should get a snap and all.
How the dancing started?
-Dancing is the same thing. -Fear again?
Just fear. The only thing you could do with a hand
was to see if there was a rock or a marble
or rubber band or nail or something that would stick in your head.
Right. Ok.
But while imobilizing my hand
dancing gets to complete the imobilization.
Dance and keep the feet busy so he can't get you.
Yes, but I think most people are interested
in living a long and fruitful life.
-You mentioned? -Fruit is good food, you mentioned.
Fruit kept me going for 140 years once
when I... was on a very strict diet,
mainly nectarines, I love that fruit
half a peach, half a plum, such a hell of a fruit.
It's not too cold
Not too hot, you know, just nice.
-What if... -A rotten one?
That's how much I love. I'd rather eat a rotten nectarine than a fine plum.
-What do you think about? -I can understand that.
Yes, that's how much I love them.
-Yes, I can understand, sir. -Some good things.
What did you do for a living?
Well, many years ago, thousands.
There was no heavy industry.
We know that.
Most things that we manufactured or we made,
most things we ever made,
was we would make a take a piece of wood
and rub it, rub it and rub it and rub it
then clean it and look at it and hit right with it
and hit a tree with it.
-For what purpose? -Just to keep busy.
There was not. There was absolutely nothing to do, had no job.
What other jobs were there?
Must've been something else besides hitting a tree with
the knowledge, hitting a tree with a
piece of stick was already a good job.
You couldn't get that job.
Mainly was sitting and looking in the sky
was a big job
and another job was watching each other.
-And what language did you speak? -They spoke...
-Rock, basic rock. -Years before Hebrew.
Yes. 200 years before Hebrew was the rock language, the rock talk.
Could you give us an example of that?
Hey, you don't put that rock on me.
Hey, what you do with the rock?
Do you remember you remember your Hebrew sir?
Yes, I would just I think I remember fluent...
Because I understand the modern Hebrew is different from the...

• Yes. The difference in some of the

-phonetic alliteration paterns. -Yes.
Can we hear an example of the ancient Hebrew?
A very ancient Hebrew is...
Oh, hi there, hello.
Hello there. How are you.
-Hi. How are you. -That's English.
-Oh wait, wait. -You remember any Hebrew?
Very little.
I don't think I remember.
I must have forgot a great deal of it.
-I think you forgot it all. -Maybe all, yes.
Maybe all. Thousands of years since I needed it.
Now, sir, did you ever...
Did you ever have any formal job as we know it today?
Yeah, well, I was a manufacturer. I was owner.
What kind of a factory did you have?
I had a I used to make the star of David, Jew stars.
Making a little money?
Where's that? Yeah.
Soon as religion came in, I was one of the first in that.
I figured this was a good thing.
How did you make them? Did you have tools?
Well, we didn't have a lady.
I employed six men each with a point.
They used to run together in the middle of the factory
A great speed, it was huge.
They were making a star.
Yes. We would make two a day because of the many accidents.
Six men running and... you know.
Lots of accidents.
You never thought of going into anything else?
Oh, no, I had an offer once.
-It came to me. Simon. -What Simon asked you to do?
Said he had a new thing, a new item,
a winner, looks like a winning item.
That was gonna be a big seller is called a cross.
And I looked at it and I turned it over
and looked in all sides of it
and I said, it's simple. It's too simple.
I didn't know then. Element.
-I didn't know with such a -You turned him down?
and I said, I'm sorry, but I'm too busy.
See, I could have I could have fired four men,
two men run together, bang, that is a cross.
Would say that I would I would have earned
over a hundred dollars doing that crosses and everything.
Yes, certainly.
Do you have a few moments, sir?
What do you mean? Money or the time.
No, we have to cut way for messages now.
-Okay, let's do it. Is it in English? -Yes.
By the way, sir, are you married?
I have been married several hundred times.
-Several hundred times? -Yes.
You haven't, man. Do you remember all your wives?
-One I remember well. -Which one was that?
The five one, Shyla.
I remeber her well.
I'm afraid to ask the next question, you had many hundreds of wives...
-Hundreds and hundreds. -But how many children you have?
I have over forty two thousand children.
And not one comes to visit me.
It's awful, sir
well, sir, it's really you mean to say there isn't one daughter...
there's many daughters, but, but they
you know how they are, children.
Good luck to them, let them go.
I don't want listen, let them be happy as long they're happy
I don't care. But they could send a note
write how're you Pop how you're doing Pop
you know, they don't.
Sir... ahn, you must have known
some great men in your time, you did travel to...
I knew the greater and the near greater.
Can I ask you about some of these...
Certainly, I'll tell you the true
the true whether I knew or not.
For instance, people are people are
very interested in somebody like Joan of Arc.
A lot has been written about her, we read a lot...
Aah what a kiss.
You knew Joan of Arc?
I went for her, damn it, I went for her.
Nowhere in history do we know of Joan going with it anybody.
Well, they don't print everything.
You did marry her? No.
No. I didn't marry her because she was on a mission.
she used to say to me
she used to say to me, I've got to save France.
I should say I look.
I've got to wash up. You save France.
See you later after you save France. I'll wash up, you know.
-How did you... -Hold it, I... yet.
How did you feel about her being burned at the stake?
Terrible.
I didn't I didn't know.
Sir, how about some of the legendary characters
who supposedly might have existed?
For instance, Robin Hood.
-Did he...? -Oh, yeah. Lovely man.
Ran around in the forest.
Did he really steal from the rich and give to the poor?
No, he didn't.
He stole from everybody and kept everything.
Out of the legend?
Out of the legend let's bring up that
he had a fellow monk, hired a press agent
running all the paper and roll and scroll.
He takes from the rich and gives to the poor, who knew?
You knew you took such a knock in the head
when he robbed you wouldn't knock him down.
-In other words... -A tough guy.
I hate to have our legendary figures smashed
Well, I hate do smashing for you.
So much to discuss, for instance,
-somebody like William Shakespeare -Oh what a pussycat.
-You are saying that you knew -A pussycat.
You did know it, for instance
Oh, that little beard, that cute hair...
He was reputed,
I guess you are agreeing that he was the greatest writer of all times.
Oh no, hey, hold up he was small.
What you mean? You just said he was great.
-Oh boy!
-And I said he was great... -No sir.
A cute man and a pussycat.
William Shakespeare was not a great writer?
Not good writer at all.
He wrote 37 of the greatest.
Shakespeare was not a good writer, no.
He wrote 37 of the greatest.
Would you ever see the original the first folios?
You mean they were edited by someone else?
Never mind the edit, did you see the folios?
No, I never saw them. Did you see?
I saw that folios, your wanna see how they are?
A blast...
A 'm' you know that look like a 'D'
an 'M' didn't look like an 'M'
I know that is a 'V'
Every letter was cockeyed and crazy.
Don't tell me he was a good writer.
The worst printmanship I ever saw in my life.
What he did? He did as it was reputed,
he did write 37 of the greatest plays of...
-38! -I only know 37.
Would you care to look at this list sir?
These items are listed come down to the ages.
-You know one that should be there? -Yes.
What's that?
Queen Alexandra and Morris.
Is there any copy of this unexistent?
This is a play that I put invested money in.
Probably the only one that didn't come to light.
Come to light and closed in Egypt.
Sir, you remember...
you remember any of the dialogue of Queen Alexandra and Morris?
Queen Alexandra turn to Morris and said:
Oh, Morris. What could it have been that I have seen?
Is it not in my marrow or we not have one on ourselves?
And he would say to her:
What are you hollering?
What are you hollering?
-Sir, what... -Wake up the whole castle, you know.
Sir, what did you do 2000 years ago to entertain...
-Walk and wing. -I want to know wether...
-Were there comedians -Oh sure sure, we had.
You remember any of the... 2,000 years ago...
A matter of days, let me see.
I remember one comedian gave us some laughs
while we were hysterical.
Well, who is he? Some good laughs.
Murray the Nut. He gave us a laugh.
A tiger came in the cave one afternoon.
Soothed in uninvited naturally.
Nobody asked how a tiger did walk in.
Tiger came in and Murray, you know, the joker
the tumbling, you know, the Nut
jumps at and grabs the tiger by the tail
yahaa, yahaa, yahaa...
and the tiger turn around and ate him in a minute.
and we get histerical laughing and laughing.
Best joke we ever had.
Oh sir, that's not very funny.
That was all we have, our chaos then that was all we have.
Terrible, I would consider that...
Have to pass me out, Murray took the tiger.
-That was entertainment? -Yes.
I would consider that in the realm of tragedy rather than comedy.
It's a point of view, to me tragedy is... is
if I cut my finger, that's tragedy.
It clinch and I cry and I run around
and I go into Mount Sinai for a day and a half.
I'm very nervous about.
And to me comedy is if you walk into an open sewer
and die, I like that.
Comedy I say.
-My finger is important. -Yes
In the 2000 years you've lived, you've seen a lot of items.
Certainly.
What is the biggest change you've seen?
In two thousand years the greatest thing mankind ever devised
I think in my humble opinion is saran wrap.
You can put a sandwich in it.
You can look through it. You can touch
you can put over your face and fool around and everything.
It's so cool you could wrap up
-You would ate it? -I love it,
put three olives in it and put a little one.
can put ten sandwiches and make up this.
-Whatever you want, It's clean and it sticks with.
-You equate this with... -You can look right through.
You equate this with man's discovery of space?
That was good, that was good.
-Sir, we ah... -Yes, yes.
We have to take time out for message now.
Why do you have to take time out?
You take the message, I'll keep talking.
That was a good message.
Well, sir, if we don't have too much more time
but we all here would like to know your code.
Well, alright, is this it?
A farewell? -A farewell address.
Hello there. This is 2000 years talking to you
from the depths of back there when we was
now I'm still and they not and I just want to say
keep your smile on your face.
And stay out of a Ferrari
or any small Italian car.
stay out of them. I wanna tell you that it's been
it's been a wonderful two thousand years
and you've been a wonderful civilization
and it's been a thrill living for 2,000 years
and eat a nectarine, is the best food ever made.

I never thought that I would have to do this. I noticed on this subreddit that there is a slew of women who are asking for help with obtaining video footage (or even comments) of their physical assault during Kilby Block Party.
I was ESPECIALLY surprised when I came across someone who saw what happened to me but unfortunately doesn't have video footage. When they expressed their dismay in how incredibly abusive my (now) ex-boyfriend was being toward me over the span of the show, something finally clicked. I am done with the relationship. I deserve better than this. They are asking around on my behalf which I appreciate (there are apparently a LOT of us which is really sad because I had a (MOSTLY) incredible time at the festival otherwise).
A few details: This was during LCD Soundsystem show was standing toward the front left (if you were looking AT the stage). My ex is tall, blonde-ish, about 6'2" and he was wearing a lime green/yellow Arsenal jersey (soccer). He has an anger issue and was, I BELIEVE, upset that I had gone to see Interpol while he decided to get close to the LCD stage; also someone was hitting on me RIGHT when I found him up front (even though I politely fended him off and told him that I was there with my boyfriend who was sitting right there) and my ex did NOT seem very happy about it (we had been fighting on and off the entire trip out there).
I was wearing a silver mesh top with "Bad Witch" on it and a real flower crown (that was made from the flowers from our 15-year anniversary dinner, sadly, if you can believe it!)
He started to get agitated, started to grab at my backpack (I found out later, just to put his merch in there, but it was in a manhandle-y way for sure since he had been yelling at me even before the show started). Everyone around us was very aware something was not right. Later, as I was dancing and minding my own business, he grabbed me HARD by my shoulders/upper arms and forced me to switch spots with him (probably because I had a better vantage point than he had, and he was jealous that I was still trying to have a good time). People by that time were WELL aware that something was up with him-- they asked if I knew him and I assured them that yes, I did know him and that he was my boyfriend and was acting strange AF. I should have left at that point, but I really thought it was over-- even though this behavior is totally on-brand for him, he has never been THIS angry with me before.
The last straw was when he turned around and PUSHED ME HARD into the people standing next to me, toppling me into people (I'm not the smallest girl in the world, I'm pretty tall myself). He yelled at me to "Stop touching" him which is ridiculous!! We are literally so close to LCD Soundsystem at KBP; EVERYONE UP FRONT IS TOUCHING EACH OTHER! We're dancing, people are being jostled, etc. It was too much. I ended up leaving after that. I ran back to the TRAX and went back to the hotel alone. I notified the front desk that I was fighting with my boyfriend, and they were really nice and said to call if I needed anything.
Anyway. He had been aggressive ever since we got home (we live together). He has attempted to steal my dog, and he was intimidating toward a girlfriend that I had at the house (I filed a police report following these events). Like I said, we live together, we have a house together, we had a LIFE together. He has been refusing to talk to me since even LAST WEEK with whatever has been bothering him-- I really tried my best to have a good time at the festival since it was such great experience DESPITE all of the drama throughout the week.
PLEASE reach out if you saw/taped anything. It would really help me out immensely. This man has gone from angry to, I believe, potentially dangerous. Like I said. Police ARE aware and on stand-by.
Thank you so much for your help! I am going to try to cross-post in other festival subreddits and on the SLC subreddit.

This is not the witch I wish to be. Tempted early in that day with that "amphetamine paste". Figuring it would be no different from Adderall, which I'd taken for many years. But it was stronger, darker, with consequences. Should have tested my drugs. But I've Always been flighty and impulsive. Part of the reason for the Adderall in the past. A good day turned into a rough evening. The comedown perhaps? Or the consequences of doing too much in a short time span. Never had a reaction like this before. Should have tested my drugs. Wretched painful vomiting of every thing id eaten and drunk that day. Sour burning stomach. Deep hunger but which could not be satiated without more vomiting. I am a mess, In pain . This was not the witch I wish to be.
Bees crammed in my skull. A racket and a pressure and a pain. But it is late now. I curl up by my dog and take my CPTSD nightly meds and I pile myself in blankets.
Wake up two hours later. A dark and liminal night. The bees have departed and taken their pain with them, though a sharp ringing persists through my skull. Loud but not painful. My stomach still rolls.
I need to empty my bladder. I stand up and begin the careful walk. I wake up on the floor between the couch and kitchen. A sore spot on the back of my head. But not too sore. I must have caught myself as I was fainting, or crumpled rather than fallen. It's now light. Dawn and liminal. i aim for that bathroom again and this time am successful. I deliberate where to sleep. A bed is probably best.
I fiddle with a thin sliver of skin torn from thumb. Pull it up off out. No blood flows. This is not for a ward or an offering or a binding. This is just a scratch. Not the witch I wish to be.
I cannot remember which medications I've taken though I do need more sleep. Risk taking excess or wait to see if I slumber? I am no witch. I am an addict with a burning desire to find a purpose that pulls me away from these mistakes and dependencies.
I am a woman shattered repeatedly by the men she loved and now sure there will be no more men. A woman who feels things too strongly. A woman who has buried her traumas over and over. Until Monday. The first day of therapy in ten years. Monday we begin again the process of excavating the embers that burn with anxiety and shame and regret and the back of my throat. That stop me from taking a full breath for fear a bringing a flame to light and choking me in its smoke. Not sure I have skeletons in my closet, but I've got kindling in my esophagus.
So we will dig it up. Pull up the pieces and examine them. Then eat dirt and worms and fallen leaves til I have a healthy bed. And then I will fill my chest and stomach with flowers and magic and light. And I will be I've step closer to being the witch I want to be.
I'm coming to join you. My path is unstable. It may be I that is unstable. But I do understand life, what it's supposed to taste like. Who and what is dulling it and attempting to deny it to those of us that recognize it's power.
And so I suppose I announce my arrival. Or my pilgrimage. I stand at your entryway I declare who I will come to be. I hope this is the place for me. At the least it will be a place of resting and learning for a woman whose feet and back and soul need rest and rejuvenation.
My name comes from Gwenhwyfar, the white witch. But you can call me Jennie. I seek your embrace.

I never thought that I would have to do this. I noticed on this subreddit that there is a slew of women who are asking for help with obtaining video footage (or even comments) of their physical assault during Kilby Block Party.
I was ESPECIALLY surprised when I came across someone who saw what happened to me but unfortunately doesn't have video footage. When they expressed their dismay in how incredibly abusive my (now) ex-boyfriend was being toward me over the span of the show, something finally clicked. I am done with the relationship. I deserve better than this. They are asking around on my behalf which I appreciate (there are apparently a LOT of us which is really sad because I had a (MOSTLY) incredible time at the festival otherwise).
A few details: This was during LCD Soundsystem show was standing toward the front left (if you were looking AT the stage). My ex is tall, blonde-ish, about 6'2" and he was wearing a lime green/yellow Arsenal jersey (soccer). He has an anger issue and was, I BELIEVE, upset that I had gone to see Interpol while he decided to get close to the LCD stage; also someone was hitting on me RIGHT when I found him up front (even though I politely fended him off and told him that I was there with my boyfriend who was sitting right there) and my ex did NOT seem very happy about it (we had been fighting on and off the entire trip out there).
I was wearing a silver mesh top with "Bad Witch" on it and a real flower crown (that was made from the flowers from our 15-year anniversary dinner, sadly, if you can believe it!)
He started to get agitated, started to grab at my backpack (I found out later, just to put his merch in there, but it was in a manhandle-y way for sure since he had been yelling at me even before the show started). Everyone around us was very aware something was not right. Later, as I was dancing and minding my own business, he grabbed me HARD by my shoulders/upper arms and forced me to switch spots with him (probably because I had a better vantage point than he had, and he was jealous that I was still trying to have a good time). People by that time were WELL aware that something was up with him-- they asked if I knew him and I assured them that yes, I did know him and that he was my boyfriend and was acting strange AF. I should have left at that point, but I really thought it was over-- even though this behavior is totally on-brand for him, he has never been THIS angry with me before.
The last straw was when he turned around and PUSHED ME HARD into the people standing next to me, toppling me into people (I'm not the smallest girl in the world, I'm pretty tall myself). He yelled at me to "Stop touching" him which is ridiculous!! We are literally so close to LCD Soundsystem at KBP; EVERYONE UP FRONT IS TOUCHING EACH OTHER! We're dancing, people are being jostled, etc. It was too much. I ended up leaving after that. I ran back to the TRAX and went back to the hotel alone. I notified the front desk that I was fighting with my boyfriend, and they were really nice and said to call if I needed anything.
Anyway. He had been aggressive ever since we got home (we live together). He has attempted to steal my dog, and he was intimidating toward a girlfriend that I had at the house (I filed a police report following these events). Like I said, we live together, we have a house together, we had a LIFE together. He has been refusing to talk to me since even LAST WEEK with whatever has been bothering him-- I really tried my best to have a good time at the festival since it was such great experience DESPITE all of the drama throughout the week.
PLEASE reach out if you saw/taped anything. It would really help me out immensely. This man has gone from angry to, I believe, potentially dangerous. Like I said. Police ARE aware and on stand-by.
Thank you so much for your help! I am going to try to cross-post in other festival subreddits and on the SLC subreddit.

So I have more evidence of the duration of contact. She's 7 months married. 6.5 months pregnant. It started out sexual from his first words. Calling her sexy. Asking to video chat. She didn't, but deflected in a passive way. I know they transitioned to Snapchat after he asked to video chat and stopped using Instagram. ~3.5 yr gap from then to when they added each other on this latest instance of his Snapchat. Proof I nailed it on at least two counts in our previous talk when I told her that "I don't remember" isn't the defense she thinks it is. It's just harmful stonewalling and lying and I'm going to operate under the assumption: of the possible answers, it's the worst one. Don't remember how long it has been going on for? I take that to mean it's been the whole time. It happened before our relationship and never stopped. She acknowledged that he had asked for sexual pictures. I asked when he started that. "I don't remember." Well that just means that's the status quo. You don't have an event to point to because it didn't stand out. That's just the nature of your conversation. It's always been him pushing boundaries and asking for it. So when I ask what video she sent and she says "I don't remember?" When I ask what else she has sent and she says "nothing else inappropriate?" Well I don't have proof but I know what my gut feeling is. Let's not get into the "inappropriate" nature of the admitted venting to your ex who about our relationship problems... Time for another confrontation with newfound evidence to poke holes. Let's see if it's enough to trigger her to come clean now on the rest. She tries to minimize it. Reiterates that nothing else inappropriate was sent. I tell her that the whole thing is inappropriate and should have been shut down when it started in the way that it did. I asked what was exchanged on Snapchat. She said he asked for more but that she told him I'm married and don't want to do that. I pointed out that he was calling her sexy and asking to video chat and there's no hint of that sentiment in the months it took to move to Snapchat. All I see is (AP):"you're looking sexy" (WW) "thanks. you're looking good too!" and "Im 8 mo pregnant, tired, and don't want to be on camera." Nothing even vaguely expressing its inappropriate or that you want it to stop because you're married. Just quick on the draw when he asks to see that sexy belly or that cute face. Asking to video chat, a shared Snapchat username, and right on over to the platform designed for sexting. Either it's as you say, that you didn't care about him at all and just went along in the most passive way imaginable or you were an enthusiastic participant. I think it's the latter. She deflects and brings up me texting my ex at one point with a picture of our new baby. Also mentioned a girl I have on Snapchat. Turns out she must have snooped in my phone? Well she never mentioned it to me despite "it shaking her." Another example of a huge personality flaw of hers. No communication. She just bottled it up and used it as justification for eroding our marriage. If she had mentioned it at the time, it could have been addressed and put to rest. One benefit to living a clean life. I told her that my recollection of the nature of the conversation I had with her was that it was short, congratulating her on getting married and sharing that we had our daughter. That I haven't spoken to her since. As for the other one brought up that's a Snapchat friend, she is a childhood friend that was a few years younger and not an ex. Our parents worked together and our families hung out a lot. That she's in a happy long term committed relationship on the other side of the country and that I havent seen her since we were like 15 and 12. That we had previously talked in college and before our relationship about each others' relationships. Mainly to vent about ones that had ended or complain about the lack of options. At one point she was in one where he wasn't very committed and I told her she deserves better. I hadn't said anything during a relationship besides being happy and wishing her the same. This all being prior to our relationship. Since then it's pretty much just random pictures you send out to everyone like stuff our family is doing or of her and her SO/dog, but not engaging directly. So yeah, nice try at deflection, but these are wildly different actions. All this gives me the idea to go see if she's got her old phone around somewhere with old messages from before we dated. I had seen the stuff mentioned in the previous post, but had drawn a line back then to not look at anything from before we dated. I feel it's relevant now for texts with AP at least, to be an example of how they interact. Found it, and checked when she was away. Read their conversation history. Everything out of his mouth is sexual. Pushing for photos. Sending nudes. He was married at the time. She wasn't super cooperative at first, bringing up the wife, but still ended up sending nudes in response to his. About a year and a half before we got together, while she was between boyfriends, he asked to meet her at a hotel when she came back home for the holidays and she agreed. Later said she couldn't because she just started dating someone and wasn't the type of person to do stuff with two guys. Partial credit I guess? Still not a great look into the character of my wife to be comfortable as AP. Anyway. Stashed away the evidence. I did do some internet sleuthing and found the address, phone numbers, Facebook, etc of him and his wife. More on that later. In our conversations about him and their history together, she did mention that before we met, she was in a relationship where the guy was suspicious/jealous and was physically threatening (punched a wall next to her) and sexually assaulted her. That she had told the ex and he confronted the guy and made him back off. So there's a new aspect of trauma she hadn't shared fully. She had shared early on that she had a relationship with someone she was scared of who got jealous and started stalking her but hadn't shared the rest. She won't tell me his name which is probably good for my own continuing "not in jail" legal status, but fuck.... I can appreciate what he did for her and still think he's scum. I can understand the sense of owing him for that and wanting that as an option for protection, which lead to putting up with it despite not wanting to follow through (as she claims). That doesn't excuse continuing into marriage though. It's also fertile ground for an emotional affair if he's the confidant she talks to when things are rough. There's also the "well I've seen it already so it's not a big deal if you send more pictures" aspect that makes it easy to slip into that dynamic.
More to follow. I did however have a session with an IC thru talkspace which went well. She brought up BPD which after looking, I can't say hits on all counts but there's definitely a lot of overlap with the Petulant subtype.
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I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost a year after ending a horrible loveless marriage about 2 years ago. When my boyfriend (55) and I (40) met, sparks flew and we hit it off immediately. I had already given up on the idea of having children after being stuck in an unfulfilling marriage so it was a surprise when my boyfriend and I learned we were pregnant with my first baby (he has 2 teenage children). During the duration of our relationship (much of it being pregnant), he has given me various nicknames including some that I find hurtful and rude. He’s trying to be funny and gives other people nicknames but I just wish it was something more endearing from him, especially being pregnant and carrying his child. Things between us have gotten more strained at we approached our baby’s due date, yesterday, and I can’t help but start to internalize his various nicknames. In the duration of our relationship, he’s called me “not too choosy floozy”, “mostly white woman” (I’m multiracial), “5/8 fiancée”, “incubator”, and most recently “almost MILF.” Not only does he call me these names but he’ll change how I am identified in his cell phone so these various names have come up at different times on his cell phone. I have told him that its offensive and hurtful, especially “not too choosy floozy” since I had recently been separated before meeting him. Right now, I feel like I’m losing autonomy in my pregnancy having had the due date come and go yesterday and I truly just feel like an incubator. There was some concern 4 days ago about decreased fetal movement and we called L&D triage who advised us to do fetal movement counts. The baby started moving more normally and has been pretty active since then but he was still upset and concerned about the decreased fetal movements, despite me telling him and trying to reassure him that I was feeling the baby actively move normally in the last few days. I also tried to get him to feel the movements but he was too impatient and didn’t feel what I was feeling. We had an argument last night and ended up going to get checked out at L&D triage to appease him and all the fetal heart monitoring and activity was normal. They checked my cervix which had no signs of dilation or effacement yet. I’m just not in early labor yet, which is what I also have been telling him, but I feel like things are progressing as expected with some BH contractions and low pelvic cramping but not consistent with any patterns. On the way home he basically told me he’s only worried about the baby and not what I’m feeling. So not only do I not feel heard and unsupported, I truly feel like I am just an incubator at this point. I feel like I’m stuck and not seen for who I am as a complete person and it feels so degrading, especially trying everything I can to be a good mom to our unborn baby. When it comes time, I don’t know that I even want him in the delivery room.

Guys, I'm on day 9, have only been able to sleep a couple of hours each night because that's when the pain peaks. I live in texas so our ac is pretty much always on. The pain that wakes up me up is incredibly bad! Last night I turned off the ac because apparently it sucks the humidity from the room and I set up a humidifier and man, I hadn't slept that good in a while. I woke up with minimal pain and I didn't take pills last night. I wish I did this sooner. Hopefully this helps someone out there. Set up a humidifier close to you, mine is a cheap 20 dollar one from Walmart but it works great and don't turn your ac on. You'll be breathing dry air, which dries your throat.

You know that feeling when you see a cute cat or dog and you just need to hug it? I'm looking for that, but with someone I love and who loves me.
But naturally, that's not something that can happen overnight. I always need some time to get used to people and get comfortable around them, so I'm mainly looking for someone to have a nice chat with. Someone who shows interest in me and tries to keep a conversation going (naturally, this goes both ways). Ideally someone with similar interests, such as gaming, magic the gathering, painting or basically any other creative ot nerdy hobby. If you're looking for someone to share your hobby with, now is your chance! I always love it when people get passionate about the things they like, and there's a good chance I'd want to try it.
A little info about me: I'm born and raised in the Netherlands, and I currently live close to the southern border where I'm studying Game Design. I've often been called kind, compassionate, open minded, and a good listener, but also an overthinker, and overly crtical at times. I'm 1,85m tall, Caucasian, and slightly on the chubby side. It's something I'd like to work on, but I've never been able to find a good reason to. I'm the type of guy who prefers a cozy movie/gaming night over a club or dance event, but I'm always open to trying new things.
About you: honestly, not much to say here. All I ask is that you're a rational person who's willing to communicate when you're bothered by something, and that you're within reasonable travel distance from me (anywhere in the Netherlands, or just over the belgian/german border. Even the UK or France would be possible if we really click!). Shared interests would be a massive plus, but not a requirement.
Anyways that's enouh out of me, just send me a message if you'd like to chat!

The highly sensitive person's traits often make travel a struggle if not downright misery sometimes. As a highly sensitive person myself I've learned a lot of things over the years to keep me a happy traveler. In fact it is my favorite thing to do! Here are 8 tips to make travel less stressful and dare I say it, great fun!

1. Get a Great Guidebook

One highly sensitive person trait is the propensity towards overwhelm. This is where planning is crucial to having a great trip. The more you know and can prepare for a trip the better. Knowing what to expect and having a good plan always decreases the overwhelm and anxiety I feel.
Having a guidebook also gives me all the information I need to know about a location in one place. It reduces overwhelm because I don't have to figure out all the different sources I need to research. Airport, Hotel, Transportation and Site Information are all in one place.
Check out a few guidebooks and find one that speaks to your interests. My favorite travel guide for Europe is Rick Steves. I like how he focuses on authentic cultural experiences which speaks to the Highly Sensitive Person's soul.
Highlight sites you want to make sure you don't miss and other sites that would be fun if you have time. Make time to familiarize yourself with all the practicalities of visiting a new place such as the language, money and local customs.

1. Pick the Right Flights

Another highly sensitive person trait is feeling stressed with time pressure. If I book a flight that is later in the morning I have more time to get the rest I need the night before. This is also imperative because another highly sensitive person trait is we get more tired than other people.
I want to make sure that I start my day on a full tank. Plus, if my flight is a little later I don't feel that I have to rush as much in the morning to get to the airport. Highly sensitive people hate to feel rushed.
I also make sure my flight doesn't get in too late. I like to have time to check into my hotel and get my belongings situated. Getting to a grocery store is also important to me, so I can stock up on drinks, snacks and possibly some breakfast items.
Especially when I'm on vacation I like to take my time in the morning, savor a cup of coffee and perhaps a pastry. That way I don't have to rush out of the hotel in the morning to go find food. The highly sensitive person is more prone to getting hangry than other people.

How to Find the Right Flights

I always start my trip planning by choosing my flights as the cost can change drastically by adjusting my schedule by even just one day. Hotels are not as volatile in their pricing. I do check out the hotel rates before booking my flights though just to be sure.
I use Orbitz to research all my flights because I can easily search all airlines and filter by time blocks (morning, afternoon or evening).
Plus I can filter my options to include seat choice and carry on bag requirements, so I get a true cost of a flight without any surprises. Not to mention I can also filter by number of stops.
Direct flights are less stressful and have less room for unexpected delays. The simpler I can make travel the more overstimulation I can avoid.
Also, there is no rule that you have to use the same carrier to and from your destination. Orbitz is great for finding just the right timing of flights to meet your schedule.
I often do this by booking two different carriers. I can purchase both tickets on the same website and add in my frequent flyer numbers, so I don't miss out on miles, as well as manage all my flights from one app. It's perfect!
One word of caution though. If you are not taking a direct flight to or from your destination try not to mix carriers. If the flight is delayed for some reason the second airline will not get you on another flight if you miss it the way they would if you booked both flights on the same reservation.

3. Choose a Central Hotel

I always choose a hotel that is central to the things I want to do. Sometimes this can be in a busier or more chaotic area. However, what I love about a central hotel is that I have a convenient home base to come back and take a break if needed. This helps with the highly sensitive person trait of getting tired more easily due to our depth of processing.
If my hotel is convenient I can do an activity and come back to take a nap or get in some quiet time afterward. This recharges me, so I have the energy to go do something else later. It's especially important if I'm visiting a big city which is full over overstimulation, another highly sensitive person trait.
Pick a hotel recommended in your guidebook. This will cut down on the number of hotels to research. I pick the area where I want to stay and review the recommended hotels in my guidebook. Then I pick the hotel with the vibe I like.
My favorite hotels when traveling abroad are boutique hotels that remind me I'm some place new. However, if this is too overstimulating then choose a chain hotel. This will provide a familiar and comfortable atmosphere when you return from a long day.

1. Assess Transportation

Personally I love taking vacations where I can take a break from driving. My trips to big cities or to Europe are perfect for this. They have such efficient and low cost public transportation. Sometimes it's nice to have someone else take care of getting me where I need to go for a change.
Renting my own car can be nice too. This can be essential if I'm traveling within the United States. I like being able to leave a place when I've had too much stimulation, am hungry or tired.

1. Plan Only One Thing per Day

Don't try to do too much in a day, running around ragged to see everything. As Rick Steve's says, "Assume you will return". I usually pick one big thing to do per day and maybe one smaller, low key thing for later after I've taken a break.
If I am going to a museum where there will be lot of crowds and I will be walking around for hours then I plan a break for lunch afterwards and then maybe a walk through a park or to sit by some water. Water is very calming for me. Time is nature, water in particular is restorative and soothing for the highly sensitive person.

6. Timing of Activities

Crowds can cause a lot of overstimulation for the highly sensitive person, so plan and book your activities for early or late in the day when crowds are lighter.
Now that I'm a little older I've become more of a morning person. Anything that I need or want to get done needs to get done in the morning or it just doesn't happen. It's great because I can get into museums and other attractions when they first open before the throngs of people rush in.
More of a night person? That works too! As the crowds are heading out to prepare for their dinner reservations, stroll in and see everything when things are more relaxed and less busy. Make sure you take some water and snacks with you, so you don't get cranky. Another highly sensitive person trait is to be more sensitive to hunger.

7. Plan in Buffer Days

Don't plan to do too much the first day in a new place. Take time to get acclimated to your new surroundings. There will be a lot of new information to take in which may cause some overstimulation. I am also usually tired from the entire travel process as well.
Get oriented to the new destination. Go for a walk around your new area or a take a bus tour of the city to get the lay of the land. I always feel much more relaxed when I know where things are and how to easily get to what I need (rest, food, nature, etc.).
Plan a buffer day when you get home too. There is nothing worse than getting home and then having to head to work the very next day.
The highly sensitive person is very attuned to their physical needs. Travel is wonderful and exciting, but since we take in so much information due to our depth of processing it can also be very overstimulating. Overstimulation can lead to exhaustion.
Make time to go to bed early and take care of other practical concerns like getting groceries and doing laundry before heading back to work.

8. Pack Right

I suggest only taking one carry on bag when traveling and resisting the urge to overpack. Another highly sensitive person trait is attention to detail. It may be tempting to prepare for every eventuality, but it's not really necessary. If you forget something it's usually easy enough to purchase it.
Having too many things to keep track of can be overwhelming and it can make the difference between everything going as planned or disaster if you need to change flights or if your bags don't make it to your destination.
https://www.yourbestfriendsguidetotravel.com/the-highly-sensitive-person-8-tips-for-planning-a-great-trip/
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Hello!
I know there are so many posts like this, but my boyfriend and I have never travelled before and we would love any input from people who know what's good. We're not expert hikers, but outdoorsy and relatively fit. We'll look into kayaking and hiking when possible, too.
We're doing 4 nights in Banff and 4 nights in Jasper at the end of May. I'll add restaurants after — I just have the one included now — but I'm wondering how this plan looks in terms of timing and location. We'll be in Calgary by 12 P.M., pick up our rental car, and then hopefully arrive at our hotel by 3 P.M.
I've checked the sidebar, other itinerary posts, random threads and I'm hoping that this plan is reasonable. Open to all feedback and changes.
Thanks so much in advance!

hey ! I'm just looking for some good conversations to distract myself from sadness. If you're around my age and interested to have a convo, please send me a message! have a nice day/night!

Y'all. We called that ish! 😂 Now she's actively dry begging for a new phone saying it got water damage the day Berbaby turned on her and she spilled water on it. Even brought Chrystal's name into it. 🤦‍♀️ Girl. We could hear you fine until you paused the live last night and put something in front of the microphone. Then we heard you moving that stuff around a perfectly good mic to make sure it stayed muffled. Come on HH. Your games are becoming more and more comical. 😂

Hey people,
I have a tough situation that i'm going through right now and i could use some advice to see if things can be mended or if this is not possible. This is going to be a very long one, my apologies....Even with all this, it does not contain half of the whole story. (sorry for the spelling errors, English is not my frist language)
Short background: i live in Europe and she lives in the U.S. we were planning on moving in together in my country due to family/friend issues that she had in the U.S. and after being here she found that my country felt more like home than her home. We were set to get married this year and had everything planned out. She would take her 3 dogs and her cat with her, work or study here and we would settle here. It would be a little bit of a tough start, but we would figure it out. We both had a little worry for our finances but it would be okay eventually.
pregnancy and panick: In late january of this year we found out that my then fiance was pregnant with our child. At that time i panicked over it because of the situation we were in at the time. In short, neither of us owned a house, i did not own a car, she had substantial debt to pay off, there would be 4 pets, a wife and now also a child under my responsibility and it scared the shit out of me. I'm absolutely not proud of what i did and ashamed of my behavior, but what i proceeded to do over the span of a whole weekend was the following: ask if she would be willing to go for an abortion multiple times, drink a bottle of wine and get intoxicated, buy a pack of sigarettes (i don't smoke), and basically just act inconsiderate and like a total ass.
After the weekend where i had my tantrum, i head her cry over the phone and it woke me up from my stupid behavior and i realized (too late) that i royally screwed up. I apologized for it and we talked about how angry she was and rightfully so. In that moment, again, i started to do things i shouldn't have done by: continuesly try to talk about it, fix it, and not give her space where she needed space. All i did was say "sorry sorry sorry please forgive me, sorry sorry sorry". That again, is not the way to go about it. She did ask me to fly to the u.s. to talk face to face so i booked plane tickets that same day for the next week. After 3/4 more days of that i pulled myself together (again...too late) and sent her a message stating that i know what i have done and been doing is wrong and i have a lot of difficulty not trying to fix it because i knew i messed up and hurt her and from that day i would just leave her be and not talk. Finally giving her the space she needs from me.
Anger and breakup: After all of the above in the weekend that followed, she called me and said that she had an amazing time together, but she did not see a future with me at this time. We had a long phone call about it and se said that if i were to come over to the U.S. for that week, that would be up to me but that is where she stands. So that is what i did, i came over to the U.S. and she said that we will spend this week getting to "re-know" eachother. She did say that we were still in a relationship and still engaged...which i found odd to hear but i was happy about it nonetheless. In this week i made sure to take a moment every day to sit her down somewhere and simply take a moment to apologize for my behvior and that i am incredibly sorry for what i have done. We went out to dinner a few times and just talked about everything. Though in the end it led to the same result, she did not see a future with me. I had tried a last time to have a conversation about it, but she gave me back the engagement ring and said no. Hurt by this, i went out for a long walk and just breathed and accepted that i screwed it up and went back to her saying that she is right, i will give her the space she asks for and let her go. She became angry and sad over this and said that she had just went through the fase of dealing with the breakup and now i am making her do that all over again, she started packing up all my gifts and gave it back to me. I did not understand that and am still a little confused about it. The day after, i had my flight back home and she dropped me off at the airport. she said that "despite how it looks, she still loves me" to which i said that i love her too. We hugged and siad goodbye and i left.
Back home week 1: In the first week, she had told me that i could call her 20 times a day and she would still pick up her phone. We can talk to eachother and we still love eachother and want the best for eachother. She kept me updated about the child and i was happy to simply talk to her and hear her say that she loves me. She had planned to talk to a pastor from her church which did couples counseling and wanted to first do this by herself and then together with me (over skype or zoom etc.). She gave me a book called "how to be the love you seek" and said i could listen to it on her spotify because that is exactly how she identifies and she relates a lot to this book, so i started to give it a listen and took notes of everything i thought was important. We made a plan t odiscuss teh book together over the phone soon and go over the notes that i made. We were broken up but there was hope.
week 2/3: I tried not to text her too often anymore and said that i am available at any time should she need me and will give her the space she asked for by not constantly texting. After a few days she was becoming more agitated and short in her responses. My words were often twisted in to something negative and they constantly made her angry. I didn't understand what was going on, but i thought she was angry and just wanted me to know. We had planned a phone call to discuss the book one weekend and the phone call started off by her telling me "i asked for space and it's not being respected". We taked about everything for a moment and then ended it where i told her that i love her and she said "good to hear". She said that she didn't want to say anything she didn't mean. After a week we texted a few times a day, but barely anything, just a good morning, baby update, and goodnight. I would check in on how she was doing, and that is it. I didn't know what to do or say anymore because for some reason everything was mkaing her angry regardless of what i say, and so i tried not to text her unless she texts me.
week 4 end of conversation: In the first week of march, she had her appointment with her pastor, where she would talk about us, but as she said "not in theway that i think she was going to talk about us". After the conversation she wanted to discuss it with me. though the day she had the conversation she texted me and said "i do not feel ready for a conversation, i will let you know when i am." and she asked me to make bulletpoints for the conversation. I was also not allowed to speak to her cousin anymore as she was trying to be a "middleman" for the both of us, but my ex wanted to have all the conversations between the two of us. i told her that i will do that, and i told her i also started therapy. Yet that was the last thing i have heard from her untill 2 months later.
2 monts of silence and my letters: Whle not speaking to her for 2 months I had been going to therapy twice a week and sought help for why i reacted the way that i did. I had time to reflect and started to slowly piece together a better mindset. I had noticed in the mean time that she had deleted me from social media and deleted some of the piutres she had of us. then later on deleted everything and started selling her engagement dress and date dresses she had bought and finally blocked me from social media entirely.
Late april, i thought it would be a good idea to send her a letter instead of a text. i had written page after page where i had written down the many things that i did wrong and how much shame i feel for it. In the end i realized that i was simply doing too much again and i decided to send her an envelope with 2 letters. 1 containing the many letters combined, and 1 containing a single letter that simply said (summarized) "i am sorry, i will be there for you whenever you need me, you don't have to do life on your own". She did not react to it and 2 weeks later i sent her a text asking how she was doing and if she recieved the letters. she responded by saying she did and she has been sitting with the content they contained. I offered that if there is anything she needs, she can let me know and she said "i am torn between wanting to just update you on everything but a bigger part of me is still hurt and trust entirely broken". I told her she can take all the time she needs, there's no need to pressure anything, and i will just be here if she needs anything.
She said what i can do to help is this: Be respectul, respect her boundaries, respect her wishes, and financial support. I said i can do all of that, though due to circumstances (i bought a house and a car) money is tight right now and i can't do anything right now at this moment. She said that confused her, she had no words for it and it was a good idea to stop the conversation for the day and she will let me know when she is ready to talk. that is the last i have heard from her since 2 weeks ago.
Outlook: Let me make this very clear, i know i have messed up very very badly, you don't have to tell me that. Though i would like to know what other people's take is on this situation on the future and if there are thing i could possibly do to regain the ability to talk to her so that i can support her and my child in any way that i can. If the relationship can be saved, that would be my dream, however supporting them is my number 1 priority regardless of the relationship.
TL;DR: I aboslutely destroyed my engagement by acting like an idiot for a whole damn weekend when finding out my fiance was pregnant. She broke up with me and now we have no communication whatsoever for months on end.

My boyfriend 24 M and I 21 F have been on and off for about 6 years, there was a time in our relationship where we were broken up for (what we thought) was good and both had separate relationships. the problem i’m having is i know his ex girlfriend personally and never have been her biggest fan, and this has caused issues in our relationship. i really struggle because the first time we dated it was very pure and innocent and now i feel it’s tainted. last night i was on his phone looking something up on google because mine was dead, and then i got too curious. i started looking in his photos and eventually ventured down to his hidden album. i honestly really didn’t think i was gonna see anything like i saw i was just curious if he actually deleted all of the spicy photos i had sent him over the years. NOPE i found him and his ex girlfriend’s sex tape, that he had kept. now, i am not one of those cool, calm and collected girls (although i wish i was). i admittedly can have a temper and have a lot of trouble processing things like this…. so i woke him up at 1 am, and freaked out about it. his response was that he was changing his phone password, will never trust me again and that he will be leaving in the morning. he did just that, when he got up this morning i asked him if he would just say a word to me. that we didn’t have to talk about the situation right now but i wanted some grasp of where his head was at. he didn’t and he left. my boyfriend has a history of throwing my personal belongings in the trash whenever he’s “done”. i have a lot of my things at his place that i would want back if there is no resolution. i understand that i breached his trust, but why would he even keep something like that?? i told him last night that i need reassurance, and comfort from him. i need to understand why. he gave me the opposite. i am beyond hurt and confused, should i wait to see if he has anything to say and if we can come to a resolution or should i walk away?

My family always had so many pets when I was growing up, at one point when I was in elementary school we had 8 dogs and 5 cats. That was already a lot. I dealt with a lot of mental illness growing up and addictions to TV, internet, gaming, pornography, etc, didn't care about school, was groomed on the internet, and my parents just let me drop out of high school. From then my mom started really hoarding animals, rescuing cats by the litter over the years to the point where now I think she has 50 cats or so spread between the small cottage we live in and a larger trailer. She works overtime and uses all the rest of her time taking care of all of them as well as feeding other feral cats she can't catch. My dad lost his job and now spends his days in misery cleaning up and taking care of cats, and their marriage is the most toxic thing I've ever seen. My mother doesn't even call my father by his real name, she gave him an unrelated name she just calls him by.
All my life from age 12 to 20 the first thing I heard almost every single morning was them yelling and arguing. I've never seen them show each other love. They're just so toxic and abusive and codependent towards each other.
I've been in relationships where I could move out and live with my partners, but my issues usually end up ruining the relationship. I'm so emotionally stunted and filled with anxiety and insecurity about the future. I can't blame my parents or my living situation for all my problems but I felt unable to really get a good footing in the world for my entire life, or witness models for healthy relationships. Most of my partnerships were codependent and obsessive because I felt such a need to escape from my home life.
I got my high school diploma, drivers license, a car, and have been working entry level jobs for a few years but I know I need to figure out college or something for my future. But the only thing I can afford to do is live in this house and somehow build a future here. I used to have one cat that lived in my bedroom, then my mom got 4 more kittens and they've grown up while I was gone and living with my boyfriend for a year. I moved back here a few weeks ago.
Now what was my only sanctuary constantly needs to be cleaned up, things get knocked off my desk or dragged around, I have two litter boxes in my room, there's cat litter and fur everywhere, I need to listen to white noise to even fall asleep because there are 5 full grown cats getting their zoomies in the middle of the night and they all live exclusively in this bedroom. They defecate at night and because their litterbox is like 8 feet from my bed, I smell it and it wakes me up. (That also can't be healthy for me at all)
My parents and even my mother alone make enough money that we could have a nice middle class life. They could've afforded to send me to college, to have a bigger house, to have money in savings, to go on vacations. Instead, we live in a small one bathroom two bedroom house, my mom lives paycheck to paycheck because she spends thousands of dollars a month on cats.
I feel like I've always been the only one who worried constantly about the future. What happens when all the cats get old and start dying? What happens when the economy gets worse and we have nothing in savings? What if suddenly we can't afford to take care of all these cats? Is it really morally better to rescue cats from living outside so they can live in cramped spaces and not possibly get the attention they deserve as pets?
My mom is mentally ill and is delusional as hoarders are, she will not listen to reason. I think she could also qualify as legitimately insane. My dad is so depressive and ruminates and complains about the living situation/my mother constantly as if I don't already know all of it. Yet I can't help but feel betrayed by him, he's the one who stayed with her as things got worse and worse. He was an adult when all this was happening, I was just a teenager.
I know it might be entitled to expect my parents to just provide me things like a more comfortable/healthy home, college, etc. My mom helps with my car insurance and I do have a bed, a shower, and a roof over my head. I can't act like I have it as bad as people whose parents are legitimately abusive, extremely neglectful, or kick their kids out leaving them to fend for themselves. I'm grateful for my life, I know it could be way worse.
I just can't help but feel like it's such a waste. Some people have hard lives because it's the best they can manage or they were dealt a bad hand. It's harder to have sympathy for people that just make their lives hard for themselves. Maybe my mother being mentally ill and feeling the compulsion to make her entire life about hoarding animals IS really out of her control. But it was still her choice to drastically lower the quality of her own, her husband, and her son's lives. And she has absolutely no remorse or empathy for that.
But even outside of the ways I'd benefit directly from more emotional/financial support from them, I just wish they had better lives? To see parents who either love each other or get divorced so I can stop seeing them at their worst all the time. To have some models of financial responsibility/security that just...makes sense even from the perspective of self preservation. My parents never showed me nothing to look forward to in life besides obesity, addiction, pain, misery, toxic relationships, hoarding, irresponsibility, codependency and things never getting better.

I'm a 25 asian male who lives with his parents. I currently have plans to pursue dental school. I've worked in dentistry while preparing my application in dental school. For the past few years, I've only been making 80k/yr (I live in a HCOL so this isn't as much as it seems) living with my parents to save money. After 6 years of investing in the market, I saved a fair amount which was enough to not need to contribute to retirement accounts (coastFIRE for anyone part of the FIRE community haha) and still retire comfortably early at 50. This was a huge goal of mine and I thought I'd be happy once I reached this- this freed up my saving to allow me to buy whatever I wanted but it turns out there's not really many things I want in life. I've spent most of my past years saving every penny to invest in the future, and that future is finally here. And yet, I'm not happy in life.
My goals when I was younger were just to buy whatever video game I wanted and order UberEats whenever I wanted. The problem is I'm on a diet trying to get lean so I meal prep everything which I already outsource. I tried ubering everywhere but I felt very uncomfortable with other people driving me around so I drive or my boyfriend drives me. I thought I'd be happy buying a Tesla but it turns out EV charging is very annoying + Teslas are very annoying to work with so I ended up not getting one after borrowing my friend's. I also thought about getting a luxury apartment nearby that's 4k/month but its honestly less convenient than living at home as I'm a few minutes away from work...The "solutions" to spending more money just end up creating more problems. I've bought a bunch of lululemon to augment my wardrobe, finally got a new phone after 8 years, upgraded to Tmobile from Mint, got a new laptop, basically bought a bunch of material stuff I've been staying away from. I went on a few flights and decided to just buy business class tickets for the fun of it and yes, it was nice, but my day to day happiness is still pretty low.
I also received a massive inheritance that basically means I don't have to work if I don't want to. The obvious question is well why don't you just quit your job? Well...I still really want to achieve my goal of trying to become a dentist and to do that, I need support of dentists to back my application which is why I still go to my job. I also really do love my work/patient interactions and work in a good environment, and something about having the freedom to say "Fuck you I quit" whenever I want makes my job a lot more enjoable. In the future, my goal is to become a part time dentist and treat my friends/family for free/charity cases, and spend the rest of my time with my kids/family/hobbies. There's also a great deal of pressure from my parents to become a dentist- they know financially I'm set (and by extension them as I've managed their portfolio for many years with great success), but this doesn't matter as I'm still not a dentist.
While I'm sure this sounds like a great problem to have, I just don't understand why I'm not happy in life. I think it's because I'm still not yet in dental school/a dentist whereas all my friends are successful in their careers but maybe there's more? I do want to get a therapist but I don't even know what I'd talk about. I know exactly how I sound: I have so much money and I don't know how to spend it wow and I"m not happy. Like jesus what a douche- this is also why I can't share this with my friends, because they'll just think I'm being a dick. Any advice?