This thread is where to get emotional support with all things related to death and illness with your dog. This is also a thread where you can seek assistance with deciding whether it is indeed time.
This is not a thread to seek anecdotes with medical care. All rules involving medical questions and anecdotes remains the same for this thread.
If your dog has passed, you can still post here for emotional support or you can create your own thread tagged with one of the RIP flairs. Be sure to review the rules of our flair guide. It is up to you how you choose to grieve.

Cross-posting this with another community for additional insight.
My husband has been travelling in the US and unfortunately has had a medical incident which requires him to make an early return to our home in Australia.
The new route that our travel agent has booked him home on involves a connection at LAX - he will be coming in on a flight from Denver with United, and leaving on a flight to Melbourne, also with United.
He’ll be flying First on the domestic leg, and Business on the international leg.
If everything runs on time, he will have exactly 2 hours connection time in LAX.
I guess I have a two-part question.
Would this be a safe and reasonable connection time for someone in full health?
If so, is it still a safe and reasonable connection time for someone who usually has good mobility but has just had a cardiac event and has been advised to try very hard to keep their heart rate under control… or should we be seeing if United are able to offer some kind of assistance in getting him through the airport?

I was seeing this guy who was a bit out of my league last year for 3ish months. I'm pretty, but I'm not white. I'm funny, smart, educated, stylish, interesting. He is very well educated and well dressed and successful - we're both top 3 college, top finance job, etc. He's very tall and handsome too. He had mentioned to me many times while seeing each other hes very picky, hes into thinner women, and likes blue eyes.
I felt sort of honored because he chose to keep seeing me with all these criteria. (he had more). He complimented me a lot on physical and other attributes so I felt very confident with him.
However, I was also on medication those couple months that made me gain maybe 10lbs of water weight so my shoulders, arms, waist, legs were all noticeably puffier than normal. He never saw my normal. I got off the meds after we broke up.
He was always happy to see me about once a week for 3-4 months - he'd plan us a date and dress up all fancy and have me help him choose an outfit to match mine, he'd hold me so close wherever we went, couldn't let go of me in public. We'd stare into each other's eyes with love and I'd never felt so close to someone. He'd call me intimidatingly beautiful and he'd say he liked me.
He'd only take me out for 1 drink every time though, in his neighborhood, and we'd return back to his to sleep over, and he'd leave in the morning for work and not text for 3 days after. We'd text a lot of volume, but he'd only reply to my chunk of texts once every 24h or so saying he was a bad texter. I tried to get him to hang out on weekends or meet my friends once, and he was a bit dodgy.
Our last date we returned home - he carried me up his building's stairs and we almost went inside but he made it a point to avoid his friends b/c they were downstairs. So we entered to avoid his friends. I felt a bit off. I finally asked him what we are, b/c I was anxious, and he seemed so stressed and was like, "ah thats been on my mind recently too...what are we doing....I'm just truly not ready for a serious relationship since my ex, I can't even THINK about them right now" and I basically ran out crying and I've been broken over it every day since because I really loved and wanted him.
Well fast forward to now, I realize that 2 months after we broke up he had a new girlfriend hard launch him.
It shocked me to my core because 1. she looked like an IG model - gorgeous, blonde, blue eyes, stick skinny. And 2. Just the fact that he told me to my face he wasn't ready and then suddenly was someone's boyfriend, taking her home to his parents, I really trusted him with everything, and this broke me deeply. She posts them all the time together all over each other - on his lap everywhere, I would've died to spend time with him at their family home. I have been crying and panicking nonstop since finding out. I feel so ugly.
1. Do you have any advice to help me with this situation? I know he doesn't think of me or care, so I shouldn't, but I can't stop myself from wanting to scream and ask him why the hell he lied to me and if it was all fake between us.
2. How can I feel better about my weight? I normally am almost as skinny as his new girl, but I was really just super bloated and chubby when I was with him. I really want him to have seen the "normal real" me, with thin waist, abs, etc. I know that's so stupid, but I wake up every day upset about it. And I've been losing a lot of weight, and instead of being happy about it I just have a panic attack about him not having seen it.

New Eye Surgery Holds Promise for Correcting Nearsightedness
The SMILE eye procedure is similar to LASIK in being less invasive, says one doctor.

SMILE procedure.Carl Zeiss Meditec, Inc., 2016 / Carl Zeiss Meditec, Inc., 2016
June 1, 2017, 3:17 AM +0430 / Updated June 1, 2017, 3:17 AM +0430
By Parminder Deo and Jacqueline Paulis, M.D.
Cleveland resident Tina Noel struggled with glasses and contacts for most of her life. The 44-year-old has been living a blurry and cloudy life as her aging eyes have progressively become drier due to an autoimmune condition.
“I’m very limited to what I can wear anymore,” says Noel. “I can't wear my contacts anymore because my eyes are just progressively getting drier. I feel my eyes get so tired, I can be driving and my eyes just want to shut when I'm wearing my glasses.”

Lasik Alternative Approved by the FDA
The Food and Drug Administration in September approved a new laser eye procedure known as Small Incision Lenticule Extraction, or SMILE. Noel's doctor recommended giving it a try.
The procedure employs a laser, similar to the one used in LASIK, to remove a small piece of the cornea to reshape the eye. Many people with corneal changes that excluded them from LASIK could now be eligible for this new surgical option.
Noel's ophthalmologist, Dr. Ronald Krueger of the Cleveland Clinic, said the SMILE procedure is all about being minimally invasive.
“I often say that SMILE is like a laparoscopic LASIK because it’s making a smaller incision,” Krueger told NBC News.
The new laser procedure is designed to treat nearsightedness in patients aged 22 and older. The price tag is roughly $5,000 and is not covered by insurance.
Dr. Ilyse Haberman, assistant professor in the Department of Ophthalmology at NYU Langone Medical Center, says that, outside of the U.S., SMILE can correct astigmatism and is being further developed to fix farsightedness. But for patients in the U.S., only very specific candidates can get the SMILE procedur

I was seeing this guy who was a bit out of my league last year for 3ish months. I'm pretty, but I'm not white. I'm funny, smart, educated, stylish, interesting. He is very well educated and well dressed and successful - we're both top 3 college, top finance job, etc. He's very tall and handsome too. He had mentioned to me many times while seeing each other hes very picky, hes into thinner women, and likes blue eyes.
I felt sort of honored because he chose to keep seeing me with all these criteria. (he had more). He complimented me a lot on physical and other attributes so I felt very confident with him.
However, I was also on medication those couple months that made me gain maybe 10lbs of water weight so my shoulders, arms, waist, legs were all noticeably puffier than normal. He never saw my normal. I got off the meds after we broke up.
He was always happy to see me about once a week for 3-4 months - he'd plan us a date and dress up all fancy and have me help him choose an outfit to match mine, he'd hold me so close wherever we went, couldn't let go of me in public. We'd stare into each other's eyes with love and I'd never felt so close to someone. He'd call me intimidatingly beautiful and he'd say he liked me.
He'd only take me out for 1 drink every time though, in his neighborhood, and we'd return back to his to sleep over, and he'd leave in the morning for work and not text for 3 days after. We'd text a lot of volume, but he'd only reply to my chunk of texts once every 24h or so saying he was a bad texter. I tried to get him to hang out on weekends or meet my friends once, and he was a bit dodgy.
Our last date we returned home - he carried me up his building's stairs and we almost went inside but he made it a point to avoid his friends b/c they were downstairs. So we entered to avoid his friends. I felt a bit off. I finally asked him what we are, b/c I was anxious, and he seemed so stressed and was like, "ah thats been on my mind recently too...what are we doing....I'm just truly not ready for a serious relationship since my ex, I can't even THINK about them right now" and I basically ran out crying and I've been broken over it every day since because I really loved and wanted him.
Well fast forward to now, I realize that 2 months after we broke up he had a new girlfriend hard launch him.
It shocked me to my core because 1. she looked like an IG model - gorgeous, blonde, blue eyes, stick skinny. And 2. Just the fact that he told me to my face he wasn't ready and then suddenly was someone's boyfriend, taking her home to his parents, I really trusted him with everything, and this broke me deeply. She posts them all the time together all over each other - on his lap everywhere, I would've died to spend time with him at their family home.
I have been crying and panicking nonstop since finding out. I feel so ugly.
1. Do you have any advice to help me with this situation? I know he doesn't think of me or care, so I shouldn't, but I can't stop myself from wanting to scream and ask him why the hell he lied to me and if it was all fake between us.
2. How can I feel better about my weight? I normally am almost as skinny as his new girl, but I was really just super bloated and chubby when I was with him. I really want him to have seen the "normal real" me, with thin waist, abs, etc. I know that's so stupid, but I wake up every day upset about it. And I've been losing a lot of weight, and instead of being happy about it I just have a panic attack about him not having seen it.

This interesting article on the "Lords of War" discusses Ryoichi Sasakawa, who called himself "the world's richest fascist", and was a major financial backer of the post-war Aikikai, and his cell-mate from Sugamo Prison, Yoshio Kodama, the ultra-nationalist Yakuza "fixer" who become known to the West during the Lockheed scandals.
https://www.voltairenet.org/article30028.html
Former International Aikido Federation chairman Peter Goldsbury recounts meeting Ryoichi Sasakawa:
"In 1984 I was elected IAF Assistant General Secretary, in succession to K Chiba Shihan. After this election an unusual episode occurred. I had a meeting with Kisaburo Osawa, who was General Director of the Hombu, and was requested to visit the Aikikai Hombu the following day. In particular, I was expected to wear a suit and tie and have with me my meishi [名刺: name cards] from Hiroshima University. I duly arrived at the Hombu and met Doshu Kisshomaru Ueshiba and Osawa Shihan. A car was waiting and Doshu got in and invited me to get in, too. We were seen off by Osawa Shihan and drove to Akasaka in the center of Tokyo and there met the IAF General Secretary, Mr Seko. After some coffee—and this was the only time ever that I was served coffee by the Aikido Doshu, who had insisted taking a tray and waiting in line at the senondescript building and were introduced to an elderly man with white hair, sitting behind a truly enormous desk. This was also the only time in my experience that I saw Doshu very much in the junior position, making a deep bow to someone who did not respond in kind. I was introduced and my meishi duly requested, with the white-haired man clearly showing his approval. After a few more minutes of mutual pleasantries, the meeting ended and we were driven back to the Aikikai Hombu. I was profusely thanked by Doshu and also by Osawa Sensei—and left the Hombu completely bewildered by what had happened. All I knew was that the white-haired man was known as Sasakawa Ryoichi Sensei. Later, back in Hiroshima, I asked my aikido teacher who Sasakawa Ryoichi Sensei was and he was very surprised that I had actually met him. He said that Sasakawa was the millionaire ‘godfather’ of Japan. He was an ex-war criminal who had made his fortune from betting and controlled a vast network of influence and contacts within the Japanese government establishment. I learned later that he regularly donated a substantial sum of money to the Aikikai and that this was the reason for our formal visit.
I mention all this because I also learned later that it was Ryoichi Sasakawa who suggested to Doshu Kisshomaru that the IAF join GAISF, which is the acronym for the General Association of International Sports Federations. I also realized that, coming as it did from Sasakawa, the suggestion was one that could not easily be rejected. The result was another source of acute bewilderment for Japanese teachers, who had taught their students that aikido did not have championships or competitions and could be called a ‘sport’ only if the term was being used extremely loosely. "

• Aikido and the IAF: Some Personal Reflections, by former IAF Chairman Peter Goldsbury

Note that the Aikikai today continues friendly relations with the Sasakawa Foundation.
The attached CIA file notes that Kodama was strongly influenced by Morihei Ueshiba's close friend Shumei Okawa, who ran a pan-Asian indoctrination center for young Japanese men at which Morihei Ueshiba was an instructor.
Yoshio Kodama's CIA file
Morihei Ueshiba remained friendly with Okawa, who, along with Ryoichi Sasakawa and Yoshio Kodama, was held in Sugamo Prison as a class A war criminal. It's worth noting that Morihei Ueshiba maintained a close friendship with Okawa well after the war, until his passing in 1957.
Yoshio Kodama was also arrested in connection with the League of Blood Incident committed by Nissho Inoue, another associate of Morihei Ueshiba, and his terrorist group, the Katsumeidan, the "League of Blood".
Inoue was part of the inner circle of the Sakurakai terrorist group formed by Kingoro Hashimoto (who twice tried to overthrow the civilian government of Japan, once with Morihei Ueshiba's participation) that met at Morihei Ueshiba's Kobukan Dojo and included Taku Mikami (later responsible for the assassination of Prime Minister Inukai Tsuyoshi, and who would hide with Morihei Ueshiba in Iwama after the war), and the aforementioned Shumei Okawa.
Kodama was also connected to the Nihon Seinensya, which was founded in 1961, and remains today one of the largest right wing ultra-nationalist organizations in Japan. The Nihon Seinensya was established under the umbrella of the Sumiyoshi-kai yakuza syndicate through the effort of Morihei Ueshiba's close associate Kohinata Hakuro - at the time that this was happening Kohinata Hakuro was on the board of directors of the Aikikai Foundation. His assistant later said "wherever we went, East or West, the members of the Nihon Seinensya and the Sumiyoshi-kai treated him like a god". The Nihon Seinensya was attached to an activist division loyal to Yoshio Kodama under the Zen Nihon Aikokusha Dantai Kaigi right wing umbrella organization that Kodama himself established, the Seinen Shiso Kenkyukai (Society for the Study of Youth Ideology), which represented a hard core within the umbrella organization, and was composed mainly of yakuza members.

There are various legal measures and contracts that provide a framework of rights and protections for surrogate mothers. It's also important to work with reputable agencies that uphold ethical standards.
In terms of legal measures, the exact stipulations can vary depending on the jurisdiction, but often include things like the right to medical care during the pregnancy, the right to terminate the pregnancy in certain circumstances, and the right to be properly compensated. Additionally, there are psychological evaluations and counselling sessions that a surrogate mother may go to before, during, and after the pregnancy to ensure her mental wellbeing.
Reputable surrogacy agencies help protect their rights by setting clear agreements on surrogate compensation, ensuring all medical costs related to the pregnancy are covered, and providing legal representation. They also typically include provisions for post-birth recovery and assistance, making sure that surrogates are not left high and dry after delivery. It's critical, however, for all parties involved to understand their rights and responsibilities before entering such agreements. So, the surrogate mother should always consult with her own lawyer before signing anything.

Mintos, the largest peer-to-peer lending platform in Europe established in 2015, extends its current promotion to a wide range of locations, including most European Union countries, Canada, Argentina, Brazil, and Chile. However, it's important to note that this offer is not accessible to residents of the United States, the United Kingdom, and Italy. Full list of restricted countries and the rest of T&C can be found here.
Mintos, a legitimate investment firm operating within the framework of EU regulations, provides its investors with safeguards up to €20,000 through the investor compensation scheme.
Currently, they are running a temporary referral program: New users who invest €1,000 or more prior to May 31, 2024, are entitled to a €50 bonus. In addition, I am extending an extra €30, bringing the total bonus to €80. Furthermore, during the initial 90 days, you will receive a 1% bonus based on the average amount you have invested. However, you don‘t need to stay invested for so long – 2 (or better - 3) days are enough.
The process involves the following steps:

1. Leave a comment of "$bid" on my post, and use my referral link. Ensure that my referral code appears above the 'Create account' button.
2. Complete KYC checks and complete the quiz (if you need any help with the quiz, let me know).
3. Deposit and invest a minimum of €1,000 (I recommend depositing a slightly higher amount, such as €1,050, to guarantee the full required investment by Mintos). This step must be completed by May 31, 2024. It's advisable to invest in one of Mintos Core portfolios, which allow for flexible withdrawals at any time.
4. Usually within 2 business days of satisfying the investment requirement, you will see an addition of €50 to your account. Subsequently, you can choose to withdraw both the bonus and your investment.
5. Inform me once you have successfully received your €50 bonus, and I will promptly provide you with the additional €30.

Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions or require further assistance.

Important news

This is an incremental update over the 1.12.0-preview and includes several breaking changes.
View the Migration Guide for details on how to prepare for the update.
Also, several new features require having a modern web browser that supports CSS Nesting. If you experience visual glitches - update your browser and/or operating system to the latest available version.
External media in chats is now blocked by default. Enable it manually if required.

Improvements

• Migrated to a new format for user data storage and added support for user accounts. See the documentation: Users.
• Implemented the Data Bank: a method for adding external sources of LLM knowledge. See the documentation: Data Bank.
• Added vLLM as a Text Completion source and Groq as a Chat Completion source
• Added new models from OpenAI (GPT-4o), PerplexityAI (Llama 3 Sonar), and Google (Gemini Flash 1.5).
• Added an ability to select OpenRouter providers in both API modes.
• TabbyAPI: added min_tokens and banned_strings parameters.
• LlamaCpp: allowed JSON schema usage (conflicts with grammar).
• Added the AI assistant contest winner character card (Sakana) to the "Download Extensions & Assets" menu and first run onboarding dialog. There you can also view and download past contest winners.
• World Info improvements: added ability to activate entries using the Vector Storage extension, Example Messages insertion position, weighted and scored inclusion groups, prioritized entries in inclusion groups, support for multiple inclusion groups per entry, ability to delay the entry evaluation until the first recursion step, regular expression type for the entry key, entry duplication, and many more. See the documentation: World Info.
• Settings are now backed up automatically every 10 minutes instead of on startup. Increased the limit of snapshots to 50 per user.
• Added Llama 3 model tokenizer. Claude tokenizer is now initialized lazily.
• Added instruct/context templates for the Phi model, and variants of Llama 3 and ChatML with message names inclusion.
• The "Advanced search" option now sorts the search results by relevance.
• Tags & Folders: added the ability to show only or hide folders. Added a toggle for alphabetical tag sorting.
• Added the ability to hide avatar images in the chat. Reorganized User Settings menu.
• Added the ability to import from AICharacterCards.com and generic URLs using the external import dialog.
• Added a quality setting for image inlining in Chat Completion.
• Forwarded IP whitelisting: can now be disabled with a configuration option.
• Added a console script for server plugin management.
• Various localization improvements.

STscript

• A brand new parser with support for closures, auto-complete, and syntax highlighting. See the documentation: STscript.
• Added a "negative" argument to the /imagine slash command.
• Added "role" and "hidden" arguments to the /messages slash command.
• Added optional "name" argument to the /send slash command.
• Added the /renamechat slash command.
• /summarize can now summarize any text, not just the chat messages.
• /sendas old syntax is now deprecated. Use the new syntax: /sendas name= .

Extensions

• Image Generation: added new NovelAI model, prompt prefixes now support macros.
• Vector Storage: added settings for WI activation and Data Bank inclusion.
• Chat Translation: added an option to translate user input text.
• TTS: MsEdgeTTS is now supported via the server-side plugin. Added a universal playback speed setting.
• Regex: added an ability to run Regex on the WI entries.
• Macros: added {{char_version}}, {{timeDiff}} macros.
• Added more downloadable extensions to the "Download Extensions & Assets" menu. Check them out!

Bug fixes

• Fixed InfermaticAI non-streamed response parsing.
• Fixed start.sh script to allow starting the server from any directory on Mac.
• Fixed a vertical alignment of zoomed avatars in visual novel mode on phones.
• Fixed the main prompt being purged from the prompt manager when disabled.
• Fixed the "Replace/Update card" function with UTF-8 characters in the filter name.
• Fixed text copy not working on messages hidden from the prompt.
• Fixed whole-word WI search to include punctuation and other non-alphanumeric characters.
• Fixed Trigger% being displayed as 0% when imported from external lorebooks.
• Fixed the "Narrate translated" option not working with TTS.
• Fixed first message regeneration on character modification if the message was edited.
• Fixed boolean values matching when searching for WI entries with /findentry.
• Fixed custom ordering of WI entries being able to sort past the header element.
• Fixed auto-selection of settings presets by name match (now requires an exact match instead of partial).
• Fixed multiswipe interaction with response streaming.

https://github.com/SillyTavern/SillyTavern/releases/tag/1.12.0
How to update: https://docs.sillytavern.app/usage/update/

Wall of BAWWWW incoming. I feel like I should preface this by saying that, as much as I hate myself, I’m probably not going to kill myself, so you don’t need to worry about that. I have pets that depend on me and a family that would be devastated if I died (which I don’t even have the decency to be grateful for) so I’m living, just out of obligation far more than a desire to actually be here. It makes me feel trapped and hopeless, but what can you do?
I’m a failure, and probably one of the most pathetic sorts of failure you can imagine, a failed artist. I loved drawing and storytelling and worldbuilding growing up and it really gave me a sense of challenge and fulfillment, and when I got to college age I decided I wanted to become a videogame artist to try and make a career out of that. Well, that hasn’t panned out like I hoped it would, I’m vastly outclassed by most other people competing in the field, and the rapid onset of AI has made things even worse. Why hire junior artists when you can just grind out a hundred AI generated pieces of concept art for free? Why should I try to get better when there’s hundreds of people who already have connections and will always surpass me anyway? I can’t even enjoy art as a hobby anymore because I’ve become so critical of anything I make, and now I’m scared to even try going back to just drawing for fun because there will always be that little voice in my head going “You weren’t good enough, disciplined enough, or persistent enough to make this work as a job. Maybe you could have done it if you weren’t such a lazy, insecure piece of shit, but now you’ve fucked up everything forever and fallen behind and missed your window. Fuck you.” Even outside my art woes, the world is just shit. Society is broken, modern media is nothing but slop designed to generate attention through hate-views and internet arguments, the governments of the world are actively screwing over the populace, and politics are becoming so violently polarized that nothing constructive is actually being done because people would rather just make things worse for the other team. I genuinely do not want to see what happens next in this shitshow, and I don’t really expect anything good to happen ever again.
I would say I want to stop trying to make a career out of game art, but the shitty thing is I’ve barely even tried. I should have been okay with sending out hundreds of applications to be rejected hundreds of times and working on improving myself and learning new skills every minute I can, because that’s what this field requires to even get a foothold. I thought I would be okay and that I could handle the challenge, but clearly that isn’t the case and I’m such a fucking lazy ass that I’ve given up before even really trying, because even the little bit I have tried was too much for me to handle. I’m 27 now, still living at home, barely driving, only working part-time. I’m a worthless piece of shit leeching off my parents because I’m too scared of leaving the nest and actually having to work hard.
I had a game project that I knew was a big scope and would require learning a lot of new things, but it seemed like something that would be fun and challenging. And for a while I felt really, really good working on it. I had a life coach who was helping me stay on track. I was slowly learning how to motivate myself with things other than shame and self-hatred. I had an idea of how to start small and make it a reality. Then I learned someone else was doing a similar project and they were leagues more talented than I was, and in that one day all the progress I made was just gone. It felt like the wobbly little tower I was building up underneath me had the base yanked out and I fell hard and never truly got back up.
I can’t go through that again, I can’t handle that kind of disappointment in myself and failure again. It hurt too much. So I think what I really want is to stop trying to try. You can’t fail if you stop trying, and if you make yourself stop caring about anything, it won’t hurt so much that you’re a failure in the first place. Ultimately that’s what I want, to stop caring about anything. I want to open up my skull and rip out every emotion, every aspiration, every goal, every bit of creativity, every little idea that will never be fulfilled, and get rid of it all forever. On my worst days I even want to get rid of my hobbies, my interests, and everything that might make me feel any scrap of positive emotion or interest just so I can be completely and utterly flat. They’re already not doing me much good. I can distract myself with games or other stuff, but distraction is all it is. Trying anything new might make me feel emotions, or even worse, be disappointing, so that’s off the table too. I want to find a medication that will blunt me so hard I never feel anything ever again. Just be an NPC with no inner monologue or opinions or aspirations and just go through the motions of life for the next sixty or so years until I finally die. Get a boring pointless job and just exist. That way I’m not really dead and my family doesn’t have to be sad, but I don’t have to really be living either. I don’t want to be happy because I don’t think I deserve it. I just want to not be sad.
I know there’s shit like mindfulness, detachment, self-compassion, and emotional acceptance. And those are all good and healthy things, but I don’t want that. I don’t want to be nice to myself because I don’t deserve it. I want to hurt myself (mentally). I want to break myself emotionally so thoroughly that I never feel or care about a single thing ever again. I want to rip my amygdala out. I want to kill my personality and just leave the body behind on autopilot. I’m tired of having no control over my emotions or thought patterns. Every other day I get into a depressive spiral like this, thinking about how much I hate myself and how badly I wish I could stop feeling things. If I could press a button and get rid of all of my negative emotions at the cost of my positive ones, you best believe I would do it.

[First] [Previous] [Next]
Edited by WaveOfWire
- - - - -
Two days… It had been two days that Tracy had gone to sleep while Harrison was working, only to come back in the morning to see him still in the workshop. She knew he was damn productive, sure, but that really couldn’t be healthy. Apparently, it had something to do with the weird bowl of orange… soup… that Cera gave him. No way was it just caffeine; any amount of the stuff would have been filtered out of his system by now. He mentioned a tingling feeling too…
Damn, she did not know enough about drugs to even start assuming what that massive alien had Harrison fucked up on. At least the scanner said he was ‘fine’—if you ignore the other glaring issues the machine brought up. Plus, he said he didn’t mind it. Either way, he managed to complete the weaving component and a few other electrical backbones of the fabricator last night, so the project was practically done, and after seeing the engineer work himself half to death, she was dead-set on finishing it.
She was currently tits-deep into the upper manufacturing portion of the towering machine. It took a tall step-stool—on top of the nearby desk—for her to push her small shoulders through the even smaller access panels high on the everything-printer. It was difficult to fit her torso in, but she managed, holding a flashlight between her teeth as she fiddled with a stubborn series of mechanical ‘hands.’ Nothing new. The situation reminded her of the ‘shop back on Mars; it had the same ever-present scent of copper and industrial sealant. All that was missing was her dad’s ancient tunes blasting through some shitty speakers… Hold on…
The modular component in her grip was successfully attached with a resonating thock. Tracy squirmed out of the dim wire-filled crevice, trying her best to not rip her only tank-top on any bolts or corners, and getting a face-full of the bright flood-lights illuminating the workshop. She scowled and blocked out the searing light with a hand, but she was a bit too late to avoid going half-blind.
“Are the mechanical manipulators in?” Harrison grunted, poking his head out underneath the printer’s floor-adjacent maintenance hatch. She looked down at him as she tried to blink off the spots in her vision. His hair was messy, barely kept in line by his habit of combing through it with his fingers. The areas around his eyes were dark and sunken… Guess that’s what two all-nighters did to a man. He’d be seeing the hat man or start hallucinating if he didn’t get any sleep soon… but then again, the two of them were so close to finishing the fabricator…
“You bet.” She gave him a thumbs up, slamming the panel cover closed. “Feel free to test it.”
He nodded and slid back underneath the machine. “Gotcha”
She gently stepped off the stool and slid off the side of the desk, stretching herself out. If her piss-poor sitting posture or her tank-top puppies hadn’t already fucked her spine up, bending over backward to build this fabricator sure as hell would. She sat down next to the panel where Harrison resided, resting her back against the fabrication tower. Her excited voice broke the muffled noises of the engineer’s work. “So… Harrison?”
“Hmm—”
“—Mind if I play some music?”
The sounds from the hatch stopped, followed by his muffled, shocked tone echoing from beneath the fabricator. “You have music!?”
She smirked at seeing the expression on his face when his head popped out again. “I sure do… Did you seriously not download any to your data pad?”
He slipped out from beneath the fabricator fully, huffing as he took a knee beside her. The scent of melded rubber, wire, and his liquid labor reached her nose not-so-unpleasantly. “You would not believe how much of a pain it is to repair an entire barracks without it… So, yeah, I didn’t.”
“Sooooooooo, whatcha wanna listen to? I’ve got almost everything on here—besides the super niche, of course.” She pulled her data pad out, swiping to the massive music folder
“You wouldn’t like the kinda music I listen to; It’s ancient.”
She gave him a lighthearted, annoyed glare. “Welcome to the club… Now what’ll it be?”
“It’s Old Earth kind of ancient… but alright” He looked up at the ceiling in thought, lips pursed. “Do you have anything from Styx or Sweet?”
She stared at him incredulously, her smirk turning into a fully-fledged smile. “Oh my God. You are an absolute dork! You actually listen to Golden Age music?”
His brows raised, accusatory. “And you somehow know exactly who those bands were and what age of Old Earth music they came from?”
She smugly leaned in closer. “That’s because I’m just as much of a nerd with that kinda music as you apparently are.” She quickly looked upward, addressing the workshop AI. “Sebas, connect nearby speakers to my data pad’s audio.” Tracy elbowed the engineer lightly as the PA system chirped its affirmation. “Now, Mr. Golden Age music, which albums do ya want me to queue up?”
- - - - -
The two of them listened to music for hours, tossing on songs they liked as they came to mind while they worked. Harrison had a ton of recommendations that spanned all over the Golden Ages and some twenty-first century classics. She didn’t even know half of them, but she was vibing either way, adding on her own taste by intermingling some older rock tracks and newer electronic beats. The playlist was steadily built up as the day went on. Thank God her dad showed her a vast array of tunes; she might not have been able to keep up with the engineer if her old man hadn't.
It made the work go by so fast, their conversations blurring as they jumped from topic to topic. They discussed whatever came to mind—old hobbies, old jobs, and old interests. A lot was left behind in Sol… At least she knew that the only other human on the planet was more interesting than a soulless workaholic. It turned out that he was a pretty big history buff, and he apparently read a lot about the colonization of the Sol system and the various wars of independence thereafter. Curious, she asked where the interest stemmed from, and he explained that his grandfather was an admiral in the Slavic-Europan deep-ice submarine fleet, which explained how Harrison’s mother was able to afford to immigrate to Mars from Europa.
He could also play an acoustic guitar, and, unfortunately for Tracy, he wasn’t even the slightest bit interested in printing one out, citing that it was a waste of time and material that would be better used elsewhere. That didn’t stop her from writing a note on her data pad to do so later, though. She hadn’t seen someone play one of those in years—the last time was probably in some old music video from the early twenty-second century. What a shame. She would have liked to hear some of the Europan songs his grandmother taught him.
On the bright side, the man seemed to take an interest in her odd hobbies. He brought up the folder of 3D models that she accidentally uploaded to the inter-module system and asked where she got the inspiration for what was in it. Boy, was he not ready for her ‘WarHalberd40k’ lore dump. Props to the guy for not standing up and leaving the workshop throughout her rambling. He even asked questions about the different factions and their weapons, which she was more than happy to talk about.
She also ended up going over the other franchises and hobbies she was interested in, such as robotics and the like. The only interruptions to their chat were the occasional Akula or Craftsman asking for insight regarding the various tasks he had allotted to them, or Shar coming in to check up on Harrison between guard shifts.
The new dynamic of the group was pretty interesting, to say the least. Tracy hadn’t been out to interact with the whole lot of Malkrin, but she definitely noticed how they treated the engineer. They’d started to look up to him in a way ever since he started showing off technology. In a little over two days, the man had shown them that he could provide the materials for a brick house, fine clothing—especially by the alien’s standards—armor, and delicious food. That wasn’t even mentioning the other benefits the technician heard a few of the ‘banished’ talking about over their meals: heating, electric lights, and other assorted machines.
She’d be feeling pretty happy about herself if she was in his position, having so many look up to him and be grateful at the same time. He seemed to view it a lot more robotically, however, only striving to get the basics done. Luckily for him, his basics were their luxury.
That wasn’t all there was to the topic; the engineer lamented about how the colony was going through food just as quickly as materials. The meals weren’t the direct issue he had, more that he had to start focusing on long-term resource harvesting rather than directly preparing for a literal horde of monsters—which wasn’t exactly ideal. It was a good thing that they just so happened to take on an influx of Malkrin then…
Either way, they finally finished the ‘totally legal modification’ for the fabricator, meaning they could at least partially address the latter half of his worries. The whole process of ripping out an old printer and replacing the parts for a new one felt a lot easier than she imagined… even if it took her at least forty-eight hours to complete it… with help from Harrison. Maybe that was why it felt so easy… She supposed the colony overseers didn’t choose the man for no reason, so his skills made sense.
“So… what do we want to print out first?” Tracy questioned, having finished testing the last major component.
The engineer stretched his arms up into the air and rotated his shoulders, then pulled back the desk’s chair and took a seat. “I’ve had just one thing in mind since the start of this whole project.”
Her brows raised in a mix of excitement and curiosity. She leaned forward, looking at the computer monitor from over his shoulder. “Oh? What’s that, then?”
A smirk formed along his cheek, the computer mouse rapidly clicking through the blueprint folder. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about what kind of firearm we need since I started dabbling in belt-fed weapon systems.” He opened one final file, a short loading bar preceding the exploded assembly view of… “An M2 Browning machine gun. It’s more than powerful enough to kill in one shot, while also being capable of fully-automatic fire, with a capacity of however many rounds we want in a belt-box.”
“Uh…huh…” She gave a skeptical nod and took a step back, not exactly sold on the idea. “It looks ancient. It’s kinetic, right? Why aren’t we using energy-based weapons? Don’t we have a gunpowder shortage coming up?”
He moved his chair off to the side to look back at her. “We just can’t; Simple as. We’ll need who knows how many more AI cores before we can get started on that level of equipment, Trace,” he huffed, returning his gaze to the specifications of the firearm. “This isn’t the most ‘modern’ weapon we can make, but its twenty-first century counterpart helps with an improved design… somewhat. And, as I said before, it should be more than capable of killing a bug in one shot, so Shar can just tap-fire it to save ammunition.”
Her head tilted quizzically. “Shar?”
“Yup,” he returned confidently. “It’s the perfect weapon for her.”
She raised a brow. “How so?”
He held his hand up, counting his reasons on his fingers. “She’s always on the front line with a shield, she can absolutely handle the weight and recoil, her four arms make reloading it simple, plus she’ll need something with range and power that isn’t a spear. So, why not? And, if for some reason, she doesn’t want to use it, we can just convert it into a turret—which is something I was planning on doing anyways with however more M2s we print out later.”
“I doubt she’ll say no to any gun you give her,” Tracy chuckled while shaking her head, inadvertently causing her bangs to cover her eyes.
“Fair enough,” he conceded with a bob of his head. “What do you think, then? What kinda weapons do you have in mind?”
She reapplied her goggles into an impromptu hairband, feeling a smirk cross her face. “Thought you’d never ask. What purpose do we need these guns to fulfill? Hordes I’m guessing?”
“That’s the idea, yeah. That doesn’t mean they all need to be machine guns, though.” He tapped the belt-fed shotgun beside him.
“Well, lemme see what we’re working with first.” She suddenly stepped forward, leaning over Harrison’s seat to access the keyboard and mouse. Her arms briefly rubbed against him, forcing him to roll his chair backward. She suppressed a giggle at seeing his incredulous frown.
Her eyes quickly traced the hundreds of individual files, clicking through all sorts of folders, each arranged from pre-twenty-first century ‘antiques,’ to more modern iterations of kinetics and particle weaponry. There was… a lot on there—almost too much to reasonably comb through. Why? Did the colony overseers just say ‘fuck it’ and put whatever they could find on here? Were they expecting the pioneers to make a museum of everything?
She sighed, standing up straight and facing Harrison. “Y’know, I’m actually impressed you managed to find that M2-whatever in there…”
He shifted in his seat, resting an elbow on the desk. “Yup, there’s a lot. I’m almost tempted to just make several of those machine guns and just call it a day, but I feel like that’d be too much of a strain on resources, no?”
“I don’t really know enough about how you fight those spider-crab things, or how to get more gunpowder, so… maybe?” She shrugged, biting her cheek in contemplation. “You might just wanna make a few smaller caliber weapons… like, uh… those old kinetic service rifles. If your pump-action shotgun works fine, I’m sure some normal guns would work just fine for now, right?”
He hardily gripped his firearm, hauling it up to his lap. “Depends on what you mean by ‘smaller caliber.’ The whole reason why the KS-23 here works—” he pulled out a massive shell from the ammo belt, displaying it on his palm. “—is because the twenty-three-millimeter round has enough energy transfer to mess up any bug's shell and insides. I’d say the smallest rounds we could use would be point-two-forty-three caliber to get any similar results.”
Brief flickers of grungy orange shells and gnashing teeth marred Tracy’s sight. She forcibly suppressed them, distracting herself with dry humor and a strained laugh. “Guess those fuckers can really take a punch, huh?”
He shook his head somberly. “I couldn’t imagine going up against them without a gun… Anyway, I like your idea of a standard rifle for now. Then, when we have some product lines up, we can go a little more in depth into personal weapons.”
“So are you gonna take one?” She hopped up on the desk, letting her legs swing off the side.
“Don’t think so, no. I’ll stick with my shotty.” The internals of the heavily modified weapon rattled as he held it up and inspected it. “Doesn’t mean I’ll keep it as is. I’m thinking of printing a laser aiming module so I can point-fire it accurately, and maybe a melee-oriented muzzle brake or a lighter chassis to reduce weight… Not sure though.”
She leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees, her cheeks in her palms. “Melee-oriented? Oooooh, like a chain-sword or something?”
His short chuckle coerced a smirk to her face. “No, not like that. More something to use as a bludgeoning tool. Right before the blood-moon, I ended up getting just as much use out of this shotgun as a hammer than as a… well, a shotgun.”
“That’s pretty fuckin’ metal. So are you just gonna make the barrel into a giant bayonet?”
He nodded. “Not exactly a bayonet, but something more like a door-breaching break.”
A short silence settled on their conversation, the faint sounds of the fabricator’s hum and distant woodwork coming to light. Right, there was an outside world… She’d been too caught up talking to Harrison for however many hours it had been. She wondered how successful the fisherwomen were in collecting, and how things had been for the others working on the wood storage shack. Maybe it was already completed? The sun peered through the cargo bay door, proving that it was only about midday. What else would they work on today?
“Hey,” she ventured.
“Hm?” the engineer hummed, his eyes focused on the monitor beside the technician.
She scooted closer to his keyboard. “What’re we doing after this?”
“What do you mean?”
She leaned backward, propping herself up on two hands. “Project wise; what’s the next big thing?”
“Uhmmm…” he muttered, interacting with the computer for a few more seconds before finally meeting her gaze. “Well, I’ve just allocated the fabricator to print out the M2, three FALs—wood furniture, of course—then there’s the magazines and ammunition, so we’ve got a lot of time to kill. The next big thing is definitely going to be metal procurement, and— Oh, right!” Harrison stopped mid-sentence, reaching into his backpack and pulling out several finger-sized metallic cubes, a sudden fire in his eyes. “Okay, so a while ago, during an encounter with three colossi, Shar and Akula found a cave with some ‘surface’ metal deposits. I took a piece off to analyze, but never got the chance to until last night. Anyway, we don’t have any machines to examine the ore, so I made use of the recycler and broke it down to its baser components.”
She nodded along, seeing where he was going with his explanation. “I’m guessing those shiny cubes are the metals from the ore?”
“Sure is. So, as it turns out, we have a pretty damn close supply of not only iron, but also, zinc, sulfur, and a small amount of cadmium. I talked with Sebas about it and did a little research. We believe it’s something akin to sphalerite, given its composition and looks, which implies it’s a sedimentary exhalative deposit. That means there must have been some volcanic…”
Harrison continued talking about underwater deposits and ancient rock formations, bringing up some theories brought forward by the now 4-AI-core-powered Sebas, delving into the current land mass’ history and possible ore output. A lot of it went over the tradewoman’s head, but she still listened intently… Honestly, she could have listened to the man talk about finding metals for hours. It was sort of like the podcasts she used to listen to while completing colonist training, but even more personal and somehow easier to get lost in…
“…find some other minerals further down like silver, but it also might be an active lava zone. Again, these are all theories and this world could just throw the fundamentals of geology away as it does for physics. Anyway, sorry for going on for so long about that, just thought it’d be important for getting some metals in the future.”
“No, no,” Tracy assured, alleviating him of concern with a wave of her hand. “If there’s anything the colony overseers emphasized, it was farming and mineral acquisition. Don’t worry.” She smiled, pointing a thumb to herself. “I just wanna know how I can help.”
“Actually, I’ve a few things only you can do. I’d like to make use of your impressive drone-making expertise for a few applications, if you don’t mind.”
The task of keeping eye contact slipped into an impossible feat in the span of a singular second, planting a pang of embarrassment on her reddened face, forcing her to inspect her fidgeting hands. “I-I wouldn’t say ‘impressive’… b-but what do you have in mind?”
She could see him raise a brow out of the corner of her vision. “Well, after what you’ve shown me with the reconnaissance flyers, I’d like your help in setting up a more permanent ‘net’ of them to scour the meadow and parts of the nearby forest to look out for any approaching hordes. I don’t want to be snuck up on… again…”
‘Again.’
She noted his small frown and sunken eyes, both a little more exaggerated than they already were. It wasn’t like she’d deny his request, but the pangs of empathy over their shared situation all but solidified her resolve. It was the least she could do. She could help him. She would help him.
The technician exhaled slowly, taking on a more serious and understanding tone than before. “I… can do that. For sure. What else?”
“I appreciate it.” He gave a wane smile. “I’ll help you with whatever you need for the project. For the other drones, I’m thinking about a small exploration vehicle to map out caves around us and mark any minerals, as well as a submersible to look for potassium deposits in the ocean.”
“So… search bots?” She crossed her arms, confidence growing; those were her specialty. “Depending on how long the fabricators take and what kind of base drones are in the blueprint folders, I should be able to get those done in no time. All I need to know are the search cues for potassium and how many drones you want.”
He quickly shuffled a few folders on the computer, turning the monitor for her to see some scientific documents with various images and walls upon walls of text. “There’re plenty of resources for that on here for what to look for, and there’s always Sebas, so feel free to ask him since he can just sort through the data for you anyway. If you can, I’d like it if you could focus on the submersible after the reconnaissance drones.”
“Sounds good to me. I’ll be right on it, then.” She gave him a thumbs up, slipping off his desk and toward her own.
“I’ll bring you lunch in a bit. Imma go check on the others,” he called.
Her stomach grumbled at the mention, her head turning to give him an appreciative smile. “Oh! Thanks!”
\= = = = =
Avian creatures chirped from their perches in the trees nearby. The wind softly rustled red leaves as grass gently gave way to calculated footfalls. A warm sun laid its light on Shar’khee’s neck. It was surprisingly pleasant, were one to take the time to notice. The mainland was a confusing place for the paladin, with its disparate representations of nature contrasting so heavily. Some days were filled with blood and ravenous beasts, while others were left within the domain of simplicity and beauty. She was content to have the latter, yet it felt like a facade veiling the former—a soft exterior covering the maliciously spiked interior. Never could she leave herself to carelessness, no matter how welcoming it might be.
Hence why she worked to ensure the safety of the star-sent’s castles and their inhabitants, her days largely spent patrolling for any roaming swarms that may wish to cause them harm. She typically used the routine to think, but today offered little in the way of solitude. This time, she was accompanied by the previously banished guardswoman, and was tasked with instructing the new one, though the specifics of what such lessons should entail were vague. Still, Shar’khee did all that she could so as not to disappoint Harrison, so she could only attempt to meet his expectations of her.
She told the yellow-skinned female of the threats that the settlement faced, how one was to defeat them, and what to expect from the beasts. The guardswoman was directed to practice her form with the spear in both thrusts and throwing for some time afterward, proving herself to be well-built. Such was expected of her profession after all.
It was pleasing to have another capable of patrolling the settlement’s outskirts for swarms, as it would greatly impact how effectively the colony could react to such a threat. If her routine was to suffer for the colony’s well-being, she was happy to show the new one her patrol route and note what to look out for.
The guardswoman was not a perfect student, however. Shar’khee never addressed it directly, but the yellow-skinned female obviously discredited the danger posed by the abhorrent, not-so-subtly shrugging off any warnings.
…That was until they stumbled upon the ‘hyena-boars,’ as Harrison called them.
The beasts resided in a clearing not too far from the castles, carelessly meandering across the sea of tall grass. Shar’khee quickly crouched, dragging the guardswoman down with her. Once she assessed that the creatures were not an imminent danger, she decided it would be an excellent opportunity to show the new one how to properly engage a threat. She was about to propose the idea, yet her speech was silenced just as swiftly.
Orange flashes darted through the trees around the glade. Taloned feet and gnashing teeth tore across the ground toward the unsuspecting beasts at the center. It was much too late for them. They were slow. Surrounded. Unaware. It was as quick as it was vicious, the forest’s reds turning a deeper crimson hue in a moment's notice underneath the abhorrent’s brutality.
Gangly monstrosities gnawed and ripped at the dead creatures, brief glimpses of raw flesh and white bone protruding from the small spaces between the clumped-up beasts. Repulsive wet splatters of blood and gore overlapped the calm noises of the forest, the grisly scene serenaded by the softest of nature’s symphonies. It was a sickening juxtaposition.
Shar’khee bit back the unease and steeled herself. They were within twenty paces—close enough to smell the abhorrent’s vile stench of rot and bile, yet far enough so as not to be noticed. She briefly considered backing away and retreating, her focus bouncing between the different avenues of escape, or how to cover her footst—
Crack.
Several sets of feral, eyeless maws snapped in their direction, the blood dripping off freshly dampened teeth. The guardswoman gasped, Shar’khee’s gaze following to see the mistake: a singular broken branch crinkled as a yellow-colored foot raised off the splintering twig.
The paladin exhaled sharply and smoothly stood up, brandishing two spears and her shield. Her glare settled on the still crouching guardswoman. “You are to stay behind my shield and let them appr—ch. Rem—ber what I have told you. Aim for their maws when you thrust y—r lance.”
The other female nodded, shakily pulling out her own weapons with unsteady placement hampering her grip. There was an obvious nervousness to her gaze. Hesitance. That would not do.
Shar’khee faced the prowling abhorrent her knuckles shifting hue as she prepared for their advance, for there was no chance that they wouldn’t. True to her experience, the stalking turned to a gallop with several clicks of grotesque tongues, the swarm bolting toward her as one. She snarled and slammed her bulwark into the ground, letting the approaching beasts skewer themselves amongst its spikes.
There were only ten—a paltry amount. She had defended against magnitudes more, and yet she still stood. What is more, they were mindless. Uncoordinated. They would be but stains in the cloth she used to clean her armor. Perhaps, if they were fortunate, they might leave a furrow in her shield to remember them by. Her arms tensed as the first leapt.
One by one, the abhorrent fell, their repulsive green blood splattering under her thrusts. Each awaiting corpse tore across the grove’s grass, lunging to their deaths with gaping maws and unfeeling hunger, yet she did not yield. Their shells were crushed by her shield and impaled by her Goddess-blessed spears, becoming but one more smear across their surface. Ten motionless lumps lay before her, seeping their ichor into the soil, none having passed the barrier she became. Dead, just as the Creator intended. She remained vigilant for a few moments longer, watching for any more of the disgusting creatures.
None showed themselves, finally allowing blood to flow to her fingers once again. The shield’s heavy presence weighed down her back, the blood flicked off of her spears before she returned them to their place.
“Are y–u well?” Shar’khee addressed the frozen Malkrin, wiping away the splatter on her bracers. The guardswoman stared at the small pile of deceased creatures, her heavy breaths and widened eyes moving from the spear from her singular kill. The paladin huffed. “We are fort—ate that there were so few.”
“F-Few? God help us…” Her horrified, stunned gaze slowly met the paladin’s. “Y-You said there were hundreds on the crimson nights? H-How do you… They were s-so fast.”*
”As I h–ve warned,” Shar’khee affirmed.
“You are a paladin! You all exaggerate your feats… I thought it was just a facade!”
“I have no r—son to lie,” she returned tersely, shrugging off the insult to her station and shaking her head. “The mainl—d is far more dangerous than ten gnash—g beasts; more so than that of your island hamlet. Pick yourself up. We m—t inform the others of this incursion.”
The yellow-skinned female snarled, furrowing her brows at the ground in frustration. At whom…? Shar’khee? Herself? Regardless, the female promptly gathered her composure, pushing air through clenched jaws. A step forward had her feet splash in the small pool of blood, the Malkrin nodding toward the paladin to continue back to the castles.
“…for the village.”
Shar’khee paused in her stride and faced her, frowning at the determination and anger leaking through the intent. “W—t was that?”
Her question was returned with honesty, a huffed voice marred by vexation. “Paladin, how am I to defend my village-mates as I am now?”
“‘As you are now?’ What do you m—n?”
The guardswoman stared down at her spear, wood creaking under her grip. “I have faltered before what you deem a paltry threat, and the thought of an even greater one sows dread deep within my bones. I wish… I wish to be better prepared to defend those of my village. I cannot help but see their faces on those of the furred creature in the clearing, and yet, even if I am so close, I am just as unable to protect them.”
Shar’khee stared down the yellow female, a long gaze taking in a rare showing of sincerity. “Y—r fears are one we all share, new one. Do not be ashamed of them. All t—t matters is that you do not let them rem—n mere fear, but make them your strength. So tell me, do you wish to impr—e? To ensure they do not fall while you are support—g them?”
The yellow-skinned female released a shuddering breath that bled off the worst of her indecision, a newly invoked flame flaring within her visage. “I do, paladin. I seek to protect and to be of use.”
“Then, if you wish to make y—rself resilient in the face of all that opposes us, it would be my undertak—g to forge you anew. Fortunately, Harrison has ordered such already, and his guidance shall prove ever useful, should you pursue it.”
The guardswoman shuffled in place at the star-sent’s mention, her eyes slipping downwards. “He is of a great many resources, but I would rather receive your teachings than those of a craftsman… or that of a male, deity-sent he might be.”
She placed a palm on the female’s shoulder. “He is far more than you might ever k—w. Regardless of if you ac—pt his guidance, I commend your conviction. However—” Her hand gripped tighter, though not enough to instill hostility. “—understand that you are protecting more than just your vi—age-mates.”
The new one nodded, staring up at the paladin with stallwart resolve. “Of course. I shall be in your tutelage, then.”
Shar’khee smiled. “T—n let us begin.”
\= = = = =
Akula was becoming increasingly certain that she knew how her parents once felt. The green-skinned fisherwoman was currently rotating between the many tasks placed upon her, guiding the newcomers through the minutia of their tasks so they might live up to the potential Harrison saw within them. She was gratified to have her own talents recognized by the Creator, but it also placed a great many responsibilities in her talons. Of course, she handled each new addition with finesse befitting her heritage, never once balking from the increasing demands. If anything, she felt validated; it was required of her as a female anyway, was it not? The more feminine-appropriate labor and management one undertakes, the higher authority they were granted.
It began with a simple assignment to oversee the chef’s introduction to the star-sent’s provided cooking appliances. As fascinating and convenient as utilities were, she held no interest in preparing any more food than she already had, but teaching another to operate the machines would alleviate such requirements of her. She reluctantly accepted the task when it was proposed, especially considering the fact that Harrison was much too busy with his other projects to bother with something as benign as cooking. His work was more valuable elsewhere.
The task itself went well, and the pink-skinned chef was quick to pick up on the use of the various kitchen devices, as well as the smoker. A grin had grown when she considered the possibility of all males understanding such domestic things readily, yet her mirth at removing the masculine job required of her was short-lived. Despite the newly initiated Malkrin’s success, Harrison had Akula frequently return to oversee the numerous cooking operations being conducted. That was in tandem with the back-to-back fishing trips made by both herself and the newly acquired females.
…Which was something else the green-skinned cycle-worshipper was ordered to oversee.
She had left the chef to his devices after producing another batch of partially seasoned meals, returning to the Creator with hopes of a break. He applauded her efforts with a nod and tersely spoken appreciation, then quickly pushed two spearguns into her hand and directed her to the ocean, where the twins were ‘working with jack shit,’ as the busy male said. She was to give the fisherwomen the tools and make sure they were used properly, and offer additional assistance in acquiring ‘enough fish to have us fed for a little bit.’
So, she left to complete the given task, feeling somewhat appreciative that her speargun was of superior quality to those she would be delivering—the newcomers were only afforded the lesser, roped-bolt version. It was only natural that she was in possession of their greatest assets, of course; the star-sent saw her as the only one capable of wielding such fantastic ammunition, showing trust that was rightfully placed in her. That did not mean the gray-skinned females were unsatisfied with their own gifts, however. The twins were swiftly caught up on the ‘manual of arms’ and sent to work, somehow managing to keep up with Akula in spite of their land-based origins. The two were fast enough to outpace the cycle-worshipper in sheer speed, but their lack of numerous winters spent traversing deeper waters meant they required frequent rests, breaking the ocean’s surface after every third captured fish or so.
Still, she had to appreciate their dedication to their task. They never complained about Akula pushing them further to reach the star-sent’s vague objective. Such a task was entrusted to her—and by proxy, the other two—and thus it would be completed, no matter how much her comfortable bed… couch called her tiring muscles.
The group of three hauled net after full net of fresh meat to the chef—and sewist, who later joined him—forcing him to relegate much of the catch to long-term storage as the kitchen simply could not deal with the surplus. At least three-quarters of the fish were put to slow cook in the now Malkrin-sized smoker. The craftsman had upgraded it with a kit provided by Harrison, who had recycled much of the dining room and workshop furniture to accommodate it. The Creator’s showcased urgency to gather materials was clearly not unfounded… It was admirable how he used what little he had left to ensure food would not be scarce. Additionally, the apparatus exuded an excellent scent for all the survivors to enjoy, the earthy aroma drawing in some of the other Malkrin for their breaks or meals.
Those were not the end of the cycle-worshiper’s tasks, however. She was also required to report on Shar’khee’s progress in training the guardswoman—helping to recycle the small swarm of abhorrent they cleared earlier—as well as the wood storage building’s progress. Indeed, she was advising and assisting however and wherever applicable. To say she was seen all around the settlement would be an understatement.
Nevertheless, she was appreciative to see her efforts bearing fruit by sundown. The processing of their meals from sea to plate was quite efficient, and those that Akula taught were now well-practiced in their duties. The twin fisherwomen dove from wave to wave, bringing fish back to the barracks, where the cook and sewist swiftly worked to transfer the meat to pans and smoker hooks alike. Then, the remnants of the Sea Goddess’ aquatic gifts would be subsequently recycled and given purpose anew as biofuel or perhaps future fertilizer.
The endless onslaught of duties and responsibilities had enlightened her, in a way. She could see where Harrison came from now; having a working project go from one point to another without input nor difficulty was a sight to behold, and it made her swell with pride. It was a surmountable feat to teach the barbaric ground-worshippers to do something properly.
…Well, they were not horrible Malkrin, so perhaps simply calling them ‘uninitiated’ was a more apt descriptor…
No matter the tribulations faced, and no matter how draining her new authority might be, her rest at the end of the day would be one that was well-earned, and it would be had with a sense of satisfaction. She deserved it, and perhaps that extended to the rest of the settlement as well.
- - - - -
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Next time on Total Drama Anomaly Island - Mine! Mine! Mine!

This season I'm starting my rebuild. I have 30mill euros, my 3 core Hg freshly promoted talent and 2 half bakers that I will train and sell when it's time to switch up training, so I won't need to spend anyway. My stadium is 60k - oversized now we've bottomed out. My gut feel is I will not have enough money to get to division 1 and compete, so that means i havent got enough right now to do so. So im ok with that, I'll get where I get but for next time, if you were to start a rebuild from scratch throug cycle training what amount would you need to start with so that by the time you reach div 1 you can compete financially with paying your players wages?

Hey everyone! 👋 I'm RBS, a self-improvement coach, and I've got something special to offer you, absolutely free—no strings attached.
But before I dive into that, let me share a little secret with you. Just a year ago, my life was pretty tough. Every day seemed clouded with negative thoughts, and my relationships, both with myself and others, were strained. Feeling alone and worthless was my norm, and I settled for less because I couldn't believe I deserved any better. It felt like a hopeless cycle.
I was constantly worried that no matter how hard I tried, I'd never measure up. This fear kept me tossing and turning at night. I tried improving myself, but it felt like I was stuck in an uphill battle with no end in sight. I started questioning if all the effort was even worth it. At times, it seemed like my fate was sealed by what I was born with—like success was reserved for the naturally gifted.
But then, something incredible happened about a year ago. Thanks to the grace of Allah (God), my life took a turn. Now, I chase my dreams with an unparalleled drive, exuding confidence and energy like never before! Today, I'm happier and more accomplished than I ever thought possible.
So, what changed in that year? It was surprisingly simple... I stumbled across my mentor.
But why a mentor, you might ask? Having a mentor was a game-changer for me. It wasn't just about getting directions; my mentor provided priceless feedback, drawing from his own life experiences. He has been through it all and knows what worked. When things got tough, he was there to give me that extra push and remind me of my potential.
So, if you're feeling stuck, consider seeking guidance from a mentor. Someone who's been in your shoes and can help you navigate the path ahead. That's why I'm passionate about mentoring others for free!
As a self-improvement coach, I'm dedicated to helping young men transform their lives and become the best versions of themselves. I draw from various sources like books, podcasts, studies, philosophy, and personal research.

What You Will Unlock🔓:

1. *🧔🏻 Boost Your Masculinity: *Walk into any room with your head held high, feeling a surge of confidence and strength that makes navigating the world effortless.
2. 🥅 Achieve Your Dreams: Imagine crossing the finish line of your biggest goal, feeling the thrill of turning your aspirations into reality, and living the life you want.
3. 🧘 Embrace Better Habits: Feel happier and healthier as you leave behind what holds you back and step into a brighter, more fulfilling future.
4. 💪 Improve Your Looks: Imagine people nodding in approval as you walk by, feeling confident and catching everyone's eye with your undeniable charm.
5. *🧘🏼 Manage Stress, Overthinking, and Other Mental Problems: *Feel peaceful and strong inside, helping you handle life's ups and downs with ease and calmness.
6. 🎯 Conquer Obstacles: Develop the strength and determination to overcome challenges and achieve your goals, like a resilient mountain climber scaling peaks in the face of adversity.
7. ⌛ Achieve More with Less Effort: Boost your productivity and efficiency, like a swift arrow hitting its target with precision, allowing you to invest time and energy in what truly brings you joy.
8. 📅 Establish Routines: Experience the sense of stability and control that comes from establishing healthy habits and routines that support your well-being and success.
9. 💸 Financial and Business Ideas: Experience the joy of being in control of your finances and running successful businesses, as you learn to manage your money wisely and explore profitable opportunities.
10. 🎙️ Master Communication and Social Skills: Take pride in being known as "that guy" among your friends, as they rave about your outgoing personality and the meaningful bonds you create, earning you the reputation of a true friend and a genuine charmer.
11. 🛣️ Finding Your Purpose: Uncover the deep meaning in life and your core values, where everything falls into place and makes sense for you.

I keep it simple. No complex strategies, just straightforward guidance to elevate your life. In just a month, I've already had 4 people book sessions with me. Testimonials are available on my profile page.
It's a month-long commitment, with the option to cancel if you don't see results after 2 weeks. Sessions are 45 minutes, twice a week, or an hour once a week if you prefer. And if you're not satisfied after the initial call, you can cancel with no further obligation. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain—so why not give it a shot?
It's time to take the next step. Just send me a DM, and I'll provide all the details you need. Imagine sitting at the family dinner table, radiating confidence and success. Your family members might glance at you with envy, noticing how manly and prosperous you've become.
Let's schedule a call to begin turning those dreams into reality. It's easy. Don't let your fear win. Conquer your fear, and take the first step by sending me a DM now!
Note: While coaching can be immensely helpful, it's essential to prioritize your health. If you're dealing with severe depression, chronic pain, or any other challenges, don't hesitate to seek medical support.

Hey everyone! 👋 I'm RBS, a self-improvement coach, and I've got something special to offer you, absolutely free—no strings attached.
But before I dive into that, let me share a little secret with you. Just a year ago, my life was pretty tough. Every day seemed clouded with negative thoughts, and my relationships, both with myself and others, were strained. Feeling alone and worthless was my norm, and I settled for less because I couldn't believe I deserved any better. It felt like a hopeless cycle.
I was constantly worried that no matter how hard I tried, I'd never measure up. This fear kept me tossing and turning at night. I tried improving myself, but it felt like I was stuck in an uphill battle with no end in sight. I started questioning if all the effort was even worth it. At times, it seemed like my fate was sealed by what I was born with—like success was reserved for the naturally gifted.
But then, something incredible happened about a year ago. Thanks to the grace of Allah (God), my life took a turn. Now, I chase my dreams with an unparalleled drive, exuding confidence and energy like never before! Today, I'm happier and more accomplished than I ever thought possible.
So, what changed in that year? It was surprisingly simple... I stumbled across my mentor.
But why a mentor, you might ask? Having a mentor was a game-changer for me. It wasn't just about getting directions; my mentor provided priceless feedback, drawing from his own life experiences. He has been through it all and knows what worked. When things got tough, he was there to give me that extra push and remind me of my potential.
So, if you're feeling stuck, consider seeking guidance from a mentor. Someone who's been in your shoes and can help you navigate the path ahead. That's why I'm passionate about mentoring others for free!
As a self-improvement coach, I'm dedicated to helping young men transform their lives and become the best versions of themselves. I draw from various sources like books, podcasts, studies, philosophy, and personal research.

What You Will Unlock🔓:

1. *🧔🏻 Boost Your Masculinity: *Walk into any room with your head held high, feeling a surge of confidence and strength that makes navigating the world effortless.
2. 🥅 Achieve Your Dreams: Imagine crossing the finish line of your biggest goal, feeling the thrill of turning your aspirations into reality, and living the life you want.
3. 🧘 Embrace Better Habits: Feel happier and healthier as you leave behind what holds you back and step into a brighter, more fulfilling future.
4. 💪 Improve Your Looks: Imagine people nodding in approval as you walk by, feeling confident and catching everyone's eye with your undeniable charm.
5. *🧘🏼 Manage Stress, Overthinking, and Other Mental Problems: *Feel peaceful and strong inside, helping you handle life's ups and downs with ease and calmness.
6. 🎯 Conquer Obstacles: Develop the strength and determination to overcome challenges and achieve your goals, like a resilient mountain climber scaling peaks in the face of adversity.
7. ⌛ Achieve More with Less Effort: Boost your productivity and efficiency, like a swift arrow hitting its target with precision, allowing you to invest time and energy in what truly brings you joy.
8. 📅 Establish Routines: Experience the sense of stability and control that comes from establishing healthy habits and routines that support your well-being and success.
9. 💸 Financial and Business Ideas: Experience the joy of being in control of your finances and running successful businesses, as you learn to manage your money wisely and explore profitable opportunities.
10. 🎙️ Master Communication and Social Skills: Take pride in being known as "that guy" among your friends, as they rave about your outgoing personality and the meaningful bonds you create, earning you the reputation of a true friend and a genuine charmer.
11. 🛣️ Finding Your Purpose: Uncover the deep meaning in life and your core values, where everything falls into place and makes sense for you.

I keep it simple. No complex strategies, just straightforward guidance to elevate your life. In just a month, I've already had 4 people book sessions with me. Testimonials are available on my profile page.
It's a month-long commitment, with the option to cancel if you don't see results after 2 weeks. Sessions are 45 minutes, twice a week, or an hour once a week if you prefer. And if you're not satisfied after the initial call, you can cancel with no further obligation. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain—so why not give it a shot?
It's time to take the next step. Just send me a DM, and I'll provide all the details you need. Imagine sitting at the family dinner table, radiating confidence and success. Your family members might glance at you with envy, noticing how manly and prosperous you've become.
Let's schedule a call to begin turning those dreams into reality. It's easy. Don't let your fear win. Conquer your fear, and take the first step by sending me a DM now!
Note: While coaching can be immensely helpful, it's essential to prioritize your health. If you're dealing with severe depression, chronic pain, or any other challenges, don't hesitate to seek medical support.

Hey everyone! 👋 I'm RBS, a self-improvement coach, and I've got something special to offer you, absolutely free—no strings attached.
But before I dive into that, let me share a little secret with you. Just a year ago, my life was pretty tough. Every day seemed clouded with negative thoughts, and my relationships, both with myself and others, were strained. Feeling alone and worthless was my norm, and I settled for less because I couldn't believe I deserved any better. It felt like a hopeless cycle.
I was constantly worried that no matter how hard I tried, I'd never measure up. This fear kept me tossing and turning at night. I tried improving myself, but it felt like I was stuck in an uphill battle with no end in sight. I started questioning if all the effort was even worth it. At times, it seemed like my fate was sealed by what I was born with—like success was reserved for the naturally gifted.
But then, something incredible happened about a year ago. Thanks to the grace of Allah (God), my life took a turn. Now, I chase my dreams with an unparalleled drive, exuding confidence and energy like never before! Today, I'm happier and more accomplished than I ever thought possible.
So, what changed in that year? It was surprisingly simple... I stumbled across my mentor.
But why a mentor, you might ask? Having a mentor was a game-changer for me. It wasn't just about getting directions; my mentor provided priceless feedback, drawing from his own life experiences. He has been through it all and knows what worked. When things got tough, he was there to give me that extra push and remind me of my potential.
So, if you're feeling stuck, consider seeking guidance from a mentor. Someone who's been in your shoes and can help you navigate the path ahead. That's why I'm passionate about mentoring others for free!
As a self-improvement coach, I'm dedicated to helping young men transform their lives and become the best versions of themselves. I draw from various sources like books, podcasts, studies, philosophy, and personal research.

What You Will Unlock🔓:

1. *🧔🏻 Boost Your Masculinity: *Walk into any room with your head held high, feeling a surge of confidence and strength that makes navigating the world effortless.
2. 🥅 Achieve Your Dreams: Imagine crossing the finish line of your biggest goal, feeling the thrill of turning your aspirations into reality, and living the life you want.
3. 🧘 Embrace Better Habits: Feel happier and healthier as you leave behind what holds you back and step into a brighter, more fulfilling future.
4. 💪 Improve Your Looks: Imagine people nodding in approval as you walk by, feeling confident and catching everyone's eye with your undeniable charm.
5. *🧘🏼 Manage Stress, Overthinking, and Other Mental Problems: *Feel peaceful and strong inside, helping you handle life's ups and downs with ease and calmness.
6. 🎯 Conquer Obstacles: Develop the strength and determination to overcome challenges and achieve your goals, like a resilient mountain climber scaling peaks in the face of adversity.
7. ⌛ Achieve More with Less Effort: Boost your productivity and efficiency, like a swift arrow hitting its target with precision, allowing you to invest time and energy in what truly brings you joy.
8. 📅 Establish Routines: Experience the sense of stability and control that comes from establishing healthy habits and routines that support your well-being and success.
9. 💸 Financial and Business Ideas: Experience the joy of being in control of your finances and running successful businesses, as you learn to manage your money wisely and explore profitable opportunities.
10. 🎙️ Master Communication and Social Skills: Take pride in being known as "that guy" among your friends, as they rave about your outgoing personality and the meaningful bonds you create, earning you the reputation of a true friend and a genuine charmer.
11. 🛣️ Finding Your Purpose: Uncover the deep meaning in life and your core values, where everything falls into place and makes sense for you.

I keep it simple. No complex strategies, just straightforward guidance to elevate your life. In just a month, I've already had 4 people book sessions with me. Testimonials are available on my profile page.
It's a month-long commitment, with the option to cancel if you don't see results after 2 weeks. Sessions are 45 minutes, twice a week, or an hour once a week if you prefer. And if you're not satisfied after the initial call, you can cancel with no further obligation. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain—so why not give it a shot?
It's time to take the next step. Just send me a DM, and I'll provide all the details you need. Imagine sitting at the family dinner table, radiating confidence and success. Your family members might glance at you with envy, noticing how manly and prosperous you've become.
Let's schedule a call to begin turning those dreams into reality. It's easy. Don't let your fear win. Conquer your fear, and take the first step by sending me a DM now!
Note: While coaching can be immensely helpful, it's essential to prioritize your health. If you're dealing with severe depression, chronic pain, or any other challenges, don't hesitate to seek medical support.

Hey everyone! 👋 I'm RBS, a self-improvement coach, and I've got something special to offer you, absolutely free—no strings attached.
But before I dive into that, let me share a little secret with you. Just a year ago, my life was pretty tough. Every day seemed clouded with negative thoughts, and my relationships, both with myself and others, were strained. Feeling alone and worthless was my norm, and I settled for less because I couldn't believe I deserved any better. It felt like a hopeless cycle.
I was constantly worried that no matter how hard I tried, I'd never measure up. This fear kept me tossing and turning at night. I tried improving myself, but it felt like I was stuck in an uphill battle with no end in sight. I started questioning if all the effort was even worth it. At times, it seemed like my fate was sealed by what I was born with—like success was reserved for the naturally gifted.
But then, something incredible happened about a year ago. Thanks to the grace of Allah (God), my life took a turn. Now, I chase my dreams with an unparalleled drive, exuding confidence and energy like never before! Today, I'm happier and more accomplished than I ever thought possible.
So, what changed in that year? It was surprisingly simple... I stumbled across my mentor.
But why a mentor, you might ask? Having a mentor was a game-changer for me. It wasn't just about getting directions; my mentor provided priceless feedback, drawing from his own life experiences. He has been through it all and knows what worked. When things got tough, he was there to give me that extra push and remind me of my potential.
So, if you're feeling stuck, consider seeking guidance from a mentor. Someone who's been in your shoes and can help you navigate the path ahead. That's why I'm passionate about mentoring others for free!
As a self-improvement coach, I'm dedicated to helping young men transform their lives and become the best versions of themselves. I draw from various sources like books, podcasts, studies, philosophy, and personal research.

What You Will Unlock🔓:

1. *🧔🏻 Boost Your Masculinity: *Walk into any room with your head held high, feeling a surge of confidence and strength that makes navigating the world effortless.
2. 🥅 Achieve Your Dreams: Imagine crossing the finish line of your biggest goal, feeling the thrill of turning your aspirations into reality, and living the life you want.
3. 🧘 Embrace Better Habits: Feel happier and healthier as you leave behind what holds you back and step into a brighter, more fulfilling future.
4. 💪 Improve Your Looks: Imagine people nodding in approval as you walk by, feeling confident and catching everyone's eye with your undeniable charm.
5. *🧘🏼 Manage Stress, Overthinking, and Other Mental Problems: *Feel peaceful and strong inside, helping you handle life's ups and downs with ease and calmness.
6. 🎯 Conquer Obstacles: Develop the strength and determination to overcome challenges and achieve your goals, like a resilient mountain climber scaling peaks in the face of adversity.
7. ⌛ Achieve More with Less Effort: Boost your productivity and efficiency, like a swift arrow hitting its target with precision, allowing you to invest time and energy in what truly brings you joy.
8. 📅 Establish Routines: Experience the sense of stability and control that comes from establishing healthy habits and routines that support your well-being and success.
9. 💸 Financial and Business Ideas: Experience the joy of being in control of your finances and running successful businesses, as you learn to manage your money wisely and explore profitable opportunities.
10. 🎙️ Master Communication and Social Skills: Take pride in being known as "that guy" among your friends, as they rave about your outgoing personality and the meaningful bonds you create, earning you the reputation of a true friend and a genuine charmer.
11. 🛣️ Finding Your Purpose: Uncover the deep meaning in life and your core values, where everything falls into place and makes sense for you.

I keep it simple. No complex strategies, just straightforward guidance to elevate your life. In just a month, I've already had 4 people book sessions with me. Testimonials are available on my profile page.
It's a month-long commitment, with the option to cancel if you don't see results after 2 weeks. Sessions are 45 minutes, twice a week, or an hour once a week if you prefer. And if you're not satisfied after the initial call, you can cancel with no further obligation. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain—so why not give it a shot?
It's time to take the next step. Just send me a DM, and I'll provide all the details you need. Imagine sitting at the family dinner table, radiating confidence and success. Your family members might glance at you with envy, noticing how manly and prosperous you've become.
Let's schedule a call to begin turning those dreams into reality. It's easy. Don't let your fear win. Conquer your fear, and take the first step by sending me a DM now!
Note: While coaching can be immensely helpful, it's essential to prioritize your health. If you're dealing with severe depression, chronic pain, or any other challenges, don't hesitate to seek medical support.