Rude sayings about boys

OldSchoolCool: History's cool kids, looking fantastic

2012.04.21 22:38 Apaz OldSchoolCool: History's cool kids, looking fantastic

/OldSchoolCool **History's cool kids, looking fantastic!** A pictorial and video celebration of history's coolest kids, everything from beatniks to bikers, mods to rude boys, hippies to ravers. And everything in between. If you've found a photo, or a photo essay, of people from the past looking fantastic, here's the place to share it.
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2009.12.30 20:27 FemaleoftheSpecies The female of the species is more deadlier than the male

The female of the species is more deadlier than the male
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2014.08.29 06:46 Old School Fool

Historical photos and videos showing people being anything but cool.
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2024.05.19 15:10 IshipMarcyandAnne Happy Birthday to Titan Speakerman!!

In honor of our boy's birthday, let's say something we love about Titan Speakerman.
I'll start: I love how he tried to save Titan Cameraman from the Scientist and Gman twice and even tried to sacrifice himself if it meant Titan Cameraman and the Alliance would have a chance
submitted by IshipMarcyandAnne to skibiditoilet [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 15:07 Legitimate_Boat6921 Georgia to Seattle?

Hi! I am from a smaller town near Macon where in comparison to a large city such as Seattle or Atlanta there isn't anything to do at all except for a couple things and I think I'm really interested in moving to Seattle as it has a lot of the things I'm looking for in a city after I'm done with getting my Associates Degree in Nursing but after looking at some other posts and comments here from some older posts by Southerns, I'm worried I may be glamorizing the idea of moving to Seattle and moving there as someone who has been in Georgia my entire life that moving to Seattle may not be all I thought it is. Even though I love the idea of living up in the Pacific Northwest, being in a more liberal state without having to be around a constant majority of conservatives in rural Georgia who make life feel very unpleasant especially since I happen to be trans, having a lot of the drizzling rain which I adore, and the nature as well as the outdoors feeling much more pleasant to be in without the mosquitos, pollen or gnats or absurdly high temperatures we often have here. I feel like it would be really nice to live in a big city with so many more things to do but I have a few things I'm a bit worried about being:
  1. Are the highways up there really that much worse than Atlanta? I heard there is only one highway and I feel like could cause major issues if just one thing happened?
  2. When I as looking at locations for card game shops that I could play Pokemon or Magic at, fencing clubs, and I am curious about getting into paintball and airsoft so I looked that up too but I saw all the results on Google Earth or maps seemed to have significantly smaller numbers of these places in Seattle and the state of Washington where when I looked up locations of these places on Google Earth and maps I saw that that these types of locations had double to triple more in Atlanta and the State of Georgia than in the former which I found weird but maybe I was just looking at the wrong thing?
  3. Are the winter months really that bad? From what I was seeing people say that half of the year is cold, gloomy and just awful in general but I am curious if that is true? From what people were saying is it just no vegetation left with everything dead and just snow and rain with no sun? I wouldn't mind it that much just probably the temperature a little bit if it got under 45 since that feels a bit uncomfortable to have outside in but I suppose the weather will be pretty similar anywhere right? I would certainly love not having the extreme heat of the South though!
  4. I'm a bit on the younger side being 18 at the moment and if I were to eventually move to Seattle I would be 20 so I am curious to how it is for younger people there? What are some of the best ways to establish myself within the city and try to make friends within things I like to do or hobbies I have? I am a bit introverted but I like to think I do an okay job with trying to meet new people and make friends try to maintain those connections. I would also probably go back to college hopefully at UW to either get the prerequisites and pursue the career of being a provider or physician so I am curious to what the college life is like in Seattle?
  5. I haven't like researched this at all since it's not a huge priority of mine at the moment of course but I've heard some people say that Seattle has an awful dating scene where a lot of people are into polyamory and if your not into that then your out of luck and I was wondering if that's really true or just people complaining a bit? Are there any particular dating apps that are popular in the Seattle area?
  6. I doubt I'll get much insight on this question but one of the reasons I wanted specifically to be an RN in an inpatient psychiatric hospital is because I don't like how I was treated during my stays in our hospitals in Georgia and I think I could make things better if I at the very least didn't treat patients like animals who were just a nuisance and I've also had that experience of unfortunately being a patient myself lol, so I feel like I would be able to connect with patients and try to make things easier in an appropriate way of course and I don't know much about how the Seattle healthcare system works and of course haven't seen much of it but I was wondering if like it would actually be more of a negative if I did my nursing education in Georgia and then just jumped ship to go to Seattle since I don't know if like I would have insufficient knowledge of how to be a good nurse in the way Seattle's medical system works and would the patients see me more of a threat since I'm not from Seattle or the state or someone they don't like since I'm from the South which is of course known to be very conservative and from what I've heard from people from the West coast say that we are fake nice and I wouldn't want to be perceived as that or do any misservice to anyone from Seattle.
  7. The major thing that worries me I suppose more than any other is that I won't fit in there in Seattle as I do here in Georgia or Atlanta and from what I've seen from other posts and comments here from Southern folk and people from Seattle alike is that "Southern charm" doesn't seem to be like a thing in Seattle where people are nice just to be polite? Are people in the those posts making it out to be more than it really is? I don't really care about not saying Ma'am or Sir but or expecting a retail worker to have all cheery and smiley while their doing their job but I guess what I've grown used to and quite like is people in my city and the South seem to be very friendly and easy to get along with and be friends with each other very quickly just not in a super serious sense mostly just stay friends only in the sense of where you meet like in my case fencing or the card game store but I feel as even while I was at a summer camp up in Atlanta or the psychiatric hospital everyone was very quick to make genuine interest in being nice to each other and getting to know one another and I'm a bit afraid that I'll be lonely in Seattle since I think I expect a certain level of friendliness and niceness just because of my upbringing only being in a small Southern town although it's county name is called the most progressive county in Georgia it is still quite rural. Another minor concern of mine is that people will notice if I have a Southern accent and think I'm a rude asshole if I try to be nice or strike up conversation but I don't think I have that much of an accent? I would really like to make moving to Seattle work but I'm just not sure if it's the environment I really want.
Thanks for reading and sorry if I said anything really dumb or entitled or whatever
also the biggest concern of all is how come there is no dunkin donuts or waffle house in seattle :(
submitted by Legitimate_Boat6921 to Seattle [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 15:07 Longjumping_Bread763 Help me please I'm in a love trianglešŸ˜­šŸ™

I am in a love triangle. Two girls are in love with me.
It's like one of those Romance movies I watch, and problem is I was the main focus of the love triangle. This sounds like out of a movie.
For some context I(15m) and my bsf, let's just call her Ashley(15f) had been friends since childhood. There was never really going on between us- I mean people had been shipping us ever since we were kids and my mom still teases me to this day that we will end up together. I just brush those aside because to be honest I felt no romantic feelings towards Ashely( at the time) but it all changed during Valentine's Day at School.
Now Ashley is bisexual, she dates both boys and girls. When we were thirteen I was the first one of our friends to support her on coming out as bisexual when she was dating this girl. Unfortunately her girlfriend cheated on her with a guy and their relationship only lasted five months. After that she dated guys, I don't remember how many guys but if I can accurately estimate it was around two guys.
During lunch at Valentine's day at school, she gave me chocolates for being a good friend. I asked her" Don't you have a boyfriend?" When I asked that she brushed me off and said" Nah! We broke up."
I told her thanks and gave her the chocolate I had bought for my crush( she rejected me so I gave it to Ashley instead) and when she received it she gave me a look which I can only describe as romantic love. We both laughed it off and continued to the next period. The few days after that was normal, but next Monday my homeroom teacher introduced an exchange student from another school. This was weird, because it was in the middle of the school year. My homeroom tasked me with showing her around school and I did.
Let's call call her Alexa- Now Alexa transferred to my school because her dad had a new job so her family moved in my city and she and I have a lot in common. She was bold and started flirting with me as a joke, now I noticed that Ashley did not seem to like that. She did not really do anything, she was busy with her club and her upcoming competition at the time and along with her grades so she did not seem to bother with the fact that I was spending more time with Alexa.
Ashley ended up in second place(congratulations girl!), she searched for me at the crowd and I congratulated her. She seemed to be happy, but her mood changes when she sees me alongside Alexa who was " very" close to me. She shot a glare at Alexa before directing her focus to me. She invited me to come with her since her team alongside her coach is going to this Italian. I politely declined and told her I was going at Alexa's place to finish our science research.
Ashley nodded, I could tell she was hurt but she tried to play it off cool and went to celebrate with her team.
Alexa asked me if I was dating her, I said no and and told her that she was a childhood friend.
Ever since that Ashley avoided me and made up excuses on why we can't hang out like we used to. Being the direct person I am, I asked her why she's acting like that. She ignored me and went to her class(rude) and after school I chased her at the terminal. I asked her again, which resulted in her snarling at me and telling me that I now have Alexa. I was confused at the time and told Ashley that Alexa is just a friend and that she is dating another guy so there's no need to worry.
Then Ashley glared at me and said that Alexa broke up with her current boyfriend after three weeks. I was dumbfounded on how a relationship can end that fast.
This month Ashley confessed thru text that she likes me very much and had romantic feelings for me ever since childhood. My heart pumped like a thousand times reading her heartfelt confession, but then I remember that this was the type of girl whose relationships ends very fast.
As for Alexa she had been making a move on me after she broke up with her boyfriend. I only knew this girl for three months, and seeing how her relationships ends I am skeptical of even starting a relationship with her. I don't really know much about her, unlike Ashley whom I knew since we were like six.
But despite that I am starting to develop feelings for both girls. I am blind to a person's red flags, and I had never been in a relationship before. Right now I can't say who I like more because of how conflicted I felt. Any advice will do. For the time being I won't make any move since I'm more busy on my graduation and getting into 10th grade.
Alexa and Ashley too, they are busy. Though Ashley will sweep in every time she gets, whenever I have free time she will invite me to hang out where she will show signs like hugging me more tightly, being more possessive and being more serious.
I'm trying to distract myself with playing games, doing hobbies and going outside. Just give advice, people of reddit. I am an insecure, immature, inexperienced guy who has never been in a relationship.
Don't mind the grammar and spelling mistakes since English is not my first language. I left out huge details and I made this look like out of a slice of life anime, but this is driving me crazy. Both girls are driving me crazy. I know people in the comments will say" Go for Ashley" but I need your thoughts please.
submitted by Longjumping_Bread763 to AdviceForTeens [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 15:04 Sufficient_Sun_5070 A daughter who has to be strong for herself....

I'm a daughter (only child) who is on the verge of being disowned for choosing a partner that isn't according to the social standards my parents think the world of. I have spent 2-3 years trying to convince my parents, calmly explaining my relationship and choice. Nothing new, I know, but when you're facing this yourself, it can be so gut-wrenching and can really make you feel ill mentally and physically. I'm keen to know what people have to say about this experience....
In return for being the 'best daughter' all these years, never questioning their choices, all I have received is a whole load of blackmailing and pseudo-medical problems that they're facing because of me especially the relationship choice I have made, "I will go suicide because this is shameful and not acceptable".
I knew it would be tough for them as he is 14 years older than me and has a past, but this relationship hasn't occurred overnight, nor have I been irrational in my choice. This relationship has stood strong over 6 years, 3 years of long distance, while I moved to a different country and he did too. We broke up in the first 6 months to make peace, knowing my parents would never accept this, but in all honestly, he is the best guy that I could love and be loved by. He has stood strong through all odds and difficulties that I have faced, being my bestest friend which is how it all started.
When I tried to make my parents meet my partner a few years ago, they downright refused, saying if he arrived at their doorstep, we can't say no; we don't have the heart to age shame someone or say anything callous, so DO NOT let him come home. With this, I left with a heavy heart and returned to my home (another country). My partner had to cancel his flights. The drama hasn't shut down; they keep sending me biodatas of boys who are better suited for their image. Aside from the passive aggressive messages, emails and calls, they have made distant relatives and family friends call me to say what a bad daughter I am to put my parents retirement and image in the society in lingo. However, despite all this background drama, my partner tried to visit them few months ago to make his intentions clear, but unfortunately, they were not home. Meanwhile, he has met a few of my best friends who give us their best wishes.
To add context, my parents moved overseas despite a lot of resistance from their families; my mum in particular was desperate to get away from her nasty in-laws. Like many NRIs leaving the country, mine received statements such as haha your daughter will marry a foreigner, and you'll regret it after many years. I guess by me marrying according to their societal standards, it would've been a perfect image cleaning exercise for them. My parents created a few blown drama last year that my mum ended up in hospital after having cpr in the office, turns out they were partying with friends the whole weekend while I worried myself sick. All this to get me to agree to their choices and get out of my relationship.
While it is so reasonable and practical to just get on with your life and get married, how do you deal with the mental abuse from your parents day in, day out and especially suicidal threats. How do you heal yourself? I would highly appreciate your thoughts. Thank you in advance...
submitted by Sufficient_Sun_5070 to u/Sufficient_Sun_5070 [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 15:01 ibid-11962 Writing and Publishing Eragon [Post Murtagh Christopher Paolini Q&A Wrap Up #6]

As discussed in the first post, this is my ongoing compilation of the remaining questions Christopher has answered online between August 1st 2023 and April 30th 2024 which I've not already covered in other compilations.
As always, questions are sorted by topic, and each Q&A is annotated with a bracketed source number. Links to every source used and to the other parts of this compilation will be provided in a comment below.
The previous post focused on details about the writing of Murtagh. This installment will focus on The Writing and Publication of Eragon, including the early abandoned starts and drafts the preceded the self-published version and Christopher's journey towards getting traditionally published. In this post the topics are arranged in almost a chronological order. The next post will focus on the writing of the Fractalverse, and so will be posted on /Fractalverse.

Writing and Publishing Eragon

The Original Idea
[When I start to write a new book] I have an image. Thereā€™s always a strong emotional component to the image, and itā€™s that emotion that I want to convey to readers. Everything I do after that, all of the worldbuilding, plotting, characterization, writing, and editingā€”all of itā€”is done with the goal of evoking the desired reaction from readers. In the case of the Inheritance Cycle, the image was that of a young man finding a dragon egg (and later having the dragon as a friend). [10]
Who's your favorite character to write? Well, for me, it's the dragon Saphira. She's the reason I got into writing a dragon. She came first? She came before Eragon? Like she was the catalyst? The relationship came first, her and Eragon. [33]
I was specifically inspired by a YA book called Jeremy Thatcher Dragon Hatcher by Bruce Coville, which is a delightful book. I just loved that idea so much of finding a dragon egg, I was like, "Well, what sort of a world would a dragon come from?" And I knew I wanted the sort of bond between rider and dragon that Anne McCaffrey had, but I wanted the intelligence of the dragons that you find elsewhere, and the language and the magic. And I wanted sparkly scales because it just seemed like dragons are fabulous creatures and they ought to have sparkly scales. That's the fun thing about writing your own books. You can make them exactly the way you want to make them, and hopefully then that appeals to the audience as well. [30]
All of that kind of was swirling around in my head, and I wanted to write about dragons in a way that kind of combined a lot of elements in a way that, "I like this", and "I like this piece", and "I like this piece", but I kind of wanted to have all these different pieces in one type of dragon, and no one had quite done it exactly the way I wanted. [30]
I live in Montana, and our library is an old Carnegie or Rockefeller library, and especially back in the 90s, it didn't have that many books. So once I read all the fantasy in the library, I thought I had read all the fantasy there was to read. Because I was not the smartest kid in the world sometimes. And I kind of thought, "Well, it's the library. They have all the books that exist, right? All the books that matter are in the library." And I really had no idea what to read after that. So I decided to start writing myself and to try and write the sort of story that I would enjoy reading. And of course, what I enjoyed reading was books about flying on dragons and fighting monsters and having adventures. [35]
Reading and literature was always important in our family. My father's mother was a professor of comparative literature and wrote books on Dante and all sorts of stuff like that. Was the myths and folklore part of your life at this time? Yes, but I should clarify that it wasn't formally introduced to me. It was in the house. People weren't wandering around talking about. It was just like the Aeneid is sitting on the shelf. I would go read things. I have a great uncle. He's 90 now, my mother's uncle. Guy is still sharp as a tack. It's amazing. But he gave me a set of cassette tapes of Joseph Campbell, who did Hero of a Thousand Faces. So that was my exposure to his theories of the monomyth and the eternal hero and all sorts of things like that. That got me very much interested in and thinking about the origins of the fantasy that I was reading because I was reading Tolkien and David Eddings and Anne McCaffrey and Raymond Feist and Jane Yolan and Andre Norton and Brian Jaques, and all of these you know authors who were popular at the time. I was very curious where does this come from. Tolkien, of course, felt like sort of the origin in a lot of cases but then I was discovering that, there are earlier stories that even Tolkien was drawing from. That was really a revelation to me. I really sort of got enamored with it. A lot of fantasy is nostalgic and that appealed to me because I was homeschooled and my family didn't really have a lot of relatives in the area, so I felt very unmoored from the rest of society. I think I was looking for a sense of tradition or continuity with the past and fantasy helped provide that. That's an incredibly articulate thought for a 15-year-old author. Or has that come with age? No, it was something I was feeling at the time. You were conscious of it at the time? Well, listening to the Joseph Campbell stuff, I was looking: Where are our coming of age traditions? Where is the great quest to go on to prove yourself as a young adult, as a man? Where's the great adventure? What do I do in life? Those are all things that are part of the adolescent experience and always have been which is why so many mythic stories about coming of age deal with those questions. I think it's a universal thing. That's why Harry Potter, Eragon, Twilight, all of these have appealed so much because they deal with adolescence. They deal with finding your place in the world as an adult when you're starting as a young adult or a child. [28]
What games have taught you to be a better writer either in creating characters or worldbuilding or plotting even? All of my gaming experience was computer games, video games. One that had a huge influence on me was the old Myst series. Personally I love solving puzzles, so that's the first thing. And also the concept of the series, especially with the second game, Riven, it's all based around people writing books that create new worlds. And you get to go in them and solve puzzles and understand how that world works. And that just tickled every single part of my brain back in the day. Now, I'm going to be slightly unkind here, and I apologize if the author [David Wingrove] is listening to this, but there were a couple of novels based off of Myst. And I was such a fan of the series that I got the books, and I started reading them. And my first thought was, "I could do better than this." And so I decided to rewrite the first Myst novel. And I created a document in MS Word, and I got exactly three sentences into my rewrite. And I thought to myself, "okay, I think I can do this, but I could never sell it. So I better go write something of my own." And the next thing I did was Eragon. So video games kind of had a direct influence on me writing. But actually reading something that I felt was not particularly successful was such an inspiration. Because it was like, "this got published, I know I can at least get to this level." And it was published. And then maybe I can shoot for a little bit higher. [pause] I think some people have had that experience with Eragon. [26]

Early Abandoned Starts

I had the original idea, the concept of boy finding dragon egg, and I tried writing a couple of very short versions of Eragon when I was fourteen, and none of them panned out so I stopped writing for a while. [28]
Real World Version
What do you remember about the early days of writing ā€œEragon?ā€ Originally, Eragon was named Kevin and the story was set in the real world. But I only finished around 10 pages. [16]
I wrote three versions of Eragon before I wrote the version that had the unicorn, which was the first major draft. The first version was set in the real world, and that's why he's named Kevin. And the reason it was set in the real world is I was inspired by Jeremy Thatcher Dragon Hatcher, which is set in the real world. [32]
I was specifically inspired by a book called Jeremy Thatcher Dragon Hatcher by Bruce Coville. By the way, Bruce knows this. If you haven't read it, it's a great book about this young man in the real world who, spoiler, goes into an antique shop and buys a stone that ends up turning out to be a dragon egg. And I really loved that idea of a stone that was actually a dragon egg and the young man becoming joined with the dragon. And so I tried writing the story. And I got exactly five pages or six pages into it and I ran into a brick wall, because a boy finding a dragon egg is a good event, but it is not a good story. And I needed to figure out what was going to happen after that. I didn't know that at first. [36]
Arya Opening Fantasy Version
But then I was going down the rabbit hole of, "Well, if there's a dragon, where did the dragon come from? What if it were an actual fantasy world where the dragons were native?" And then that led me to then write a second beginning--I didn't get very far with this--that was more of a traditional fantasy story, and it opened with Arya and a couple other elves escaping a dungeon with a big battle, and at the very end of the battle, they send the dragon egg away, and Kevin finds it. But I didn't have the rest of the story, so I stopped writing it in that format. [32]
So I tried writing a second version of the story. So the first version of that story I wrote was set in the real world. Second version was more of like a fantasy world. [36]
I had the original idea when I was fourteen. I even wrote an early version of the story where it was set in the real world. But I soon realized that it was a lot more interesting to have a dragon in a fantastical setting. [8]
Research Break
I tried writing before and I always failed because I would only get like four to six pages into a story and then I didn't know what to do next. And that was because I didn't actually have my story. All I really had were the inciting incidents, like a boy finds a dragon egg in the middle of a forest. Great. But that's not a story, that's just one event. What happens as a result? So before starting Eragon, I was very methodical about this. I read a whole bunch of books on how to write, how to plot stories. [35]
I realized I wasn't getting anywhere. And I didn't know how to do what I was trying to do. Now, fortunately for me, my parents had noticed that I was getting interested in writing. And all of a sudden, books appeared in the house. There was no comment, no one forced it, these just magically appeared, and I read them. Some of the books that were incredibly helpful to me were these books that were called The Writer's Handbook, which was a collection of essays published each year by The Writer's Digest magazine. I had one from 1998, and I had one from, I think, 1993, or something like that. And there were essays from Stephen King and John Grisham and I think Ursula Le Guin and all sorts of other authors about what it was like to be an author both professionally and creatively. And that was incredibly helpful to me because again, the internet was not a resource. But the book that really made the difference for me was a book called Story by Robert McKee. It's a book for screenwriters and it's all about the structure of story. And up until that moment, I had never really consciously thought about the fact that stories have structure and that you can control that structure for the effect on the readers. So I devoured that book and I said, okay, I'm going to try this again. [36]
Did you very much sit down and study structure and character development and etc? I did. It wasn't a formal course or anything, it's just that my parents started buying these books and they started showing up. In fact, I still have them here on my shelf. This bookcase to my right is full of research books, technical books, language books. I read a book called Story by Robert McKee, which is a screenwriting book, that was and often has been very popular in Hollywood. It's a fairly technical look at story structure. I would never say do everything he says because of course you shouldn't necessarily follow any one formula, but that book really got me thinking about the fact that stories do have structure, which I hadn't really thought about before that. And that one can control that structure, and that this gives you something to work with. Before Eragon, I tried writing a number of stories and I never got past the first four to six pages, ten pages, because I never had the plot. All I would ever have was the inciting incident which, in the case of Eragon, is a young man finds a dragon egg. Ok, fine, but that's not a story. So when I read that book, then I was like wow, so I can control the structure of this. [28]
The problem with all of my early writing was that Iā€™d get an idea and just start ā€” I didnā€™t actually have a plot. But I was a pretty methodical kid, so I started reading about how to write. Fortunately, my parents are observant, and these kinds of books magically began appearing in the house. And I read all of them. [16]
Unused Arya Outline
So at this point, I was 15, that's when I graduated from high school and I was very methodical about it because I hate failing. So I said, okay, I'm going to create a fantasy world. And I did that. And then I said, I'm gonna plot out an entire book in this fantasy world. And I did that too. And then I said, but I'm not gonna write this. This is just a thought exercise. I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna stick it in a drawer. And I still have that to this day, that world and that story, I still have it sitting in a drawer somewhere. [36]
Then I spent some time and I created an entire fantasy world and I plotted out an entire fantasy novel in that world and I did not write it. I just stuck it in a drawer and that's where it's been sitting for 25 years now. And then I just did that to prove to myself that I could plot out an entire book. [35]
Before writing Eragon, again I was very methodical even as a teenager, I created an entire fantasy world. Wrote pages and pages about the worldbuilding, and then I plotted out an entire story in that world just to prove to myself that I could plot a story, create a world, and then I didn't write it. I put it aside. I still have it all saved. Put it in a drawer. [28]

Kevin

Writing The First Full Draft
And then I decided okay now I'm going to plot out a trilogy, because all great fantasy stories are trilogies. I'm going to do it as the heroic monomyth, because that is, at least my understanding back then, is this is one of the oldest forms of stories. I know it works on a general sense. It's going to give me a safety net, and then I'm going to write the first book as a practice book just to see if I'm capable of producing something that's three, four, five hundred pages long. And that's what I did. That was about two and a half months of worldbuilding, plotting, creating this. Then I wrote the first book and that was Eragon. That was my practice book. I never actually planned on publishing Eragon. It was only after I'd put so much work into it and my parents read it that then we proceeded with it. I was aware of story structure. I continue to read lots of books on it. [28]
And then version three is the version that everyone generally knows. And that's where I spent the time to plot out the whole series before writing, because having a idea of where you're going seems to help with the writing, at least for me. Usually. [32]
I originally saw Eragon as a practice novel, which is part of why itā€™s a very typical heroā€™s story. I knew that structure worked and it gave me the safety net I needed. [16]
The first draft went super fast. It went really fast because I had no idea what I was doing. And I just wrote that sucker. I wrote the first 60 pages by hand with ballpoint pen, cause I didn't know how to type on a computer. And then by the time I typed all that into the computer, I knew how to type. I did the rest in the computer. But this was back in the day when computers were fairly new. We had a Mac classic, which only had two megabytes of RAM. And the problem is that the operating system chewed up some of that memory. And my book file was around two megabytes large. So I actually had to split the book into two because I couldn't open the whole file on the computer or the computer would crash. So I had to open half the book and then close that and then open the other half. [35]
The First Draft
Once I finished the first draft, I was super excited and I thought, "well all of these things on how to write say that you should read your own book and see if there's any tweaks you wanna make." But I was really excited because I was getting to read my own book for the first time, and I thought this is gonna be awesome. And it didn't take very long while reading it to realize that it was awful. It was horrible. And just to give you an idea of just how bad that first draft was, in the very first draft of Eragon, Eragon wasn't named Eragon, Eragon was named Kevin. And there was also a unicorn in that first draft at one point, so you know it wasn't very good. [35]
If I heard correctly as I was reading, Eragon wasn't originally called Eragon? No, in the first draft of the book he was called Kevin. There's a reason! Look I have an explanation for it, okay. The explanation is that my original inspiration was Jeremy Thatcher Dragon Hatcher which is set in the real world. The original version of Eragon that I was developing was set in the real world and when I decided that it would make more sense to have a world where the dragons were native to and switched it over to this fantasy world and began to develop that, I just kept the name that I'd been working with, which was Kevin. Naming a main character is hard, especially when you get used to a certain name. I don't want to say I was lazy. I want to focus on the world building and writing the first draft and I'll worry about the name later. [28]
There is an early version of Eragon that no one's seen, that even my editor at Random House never saw. And that was my first draft. And in that first draft, Eragon encountered a unicorn in the Beor Mountains on the way to the Varden. And the unicorn touches him and essentially affects the transformation that he goes under during the blood oath ceremony with the elves in the second book, in Eldest. And his whole storyline with the Varden once he gets to Farthen Dƻr is completely different because now he has these abilities and he and a team of people ends up getting sent on a scouting mission in the dwarven tunnels to go find the Urgal army and then they have to flee back through the tunnels to warn everyone of this huge army and I had a underground cave full of lava, and multiple shades, and a huge Urgal army. There was there was a lot of dramatic stuff. Finding the Ra'zac in Dras-Leona was completely different. This is the draft where Eragon was named Kevin. [32]
I haven't thought about that version in ages. I think Arya was awake all the way from Gil'ead to Farthen Dƻr in that version. That's right, I had to completely rewrite that. It's an unpleasant ride for her. No, no, no, she was awake and healed. She was awake. That's right, God, I had to rewrite most of the last chunk of the book now that I think back, it's been a long time. [32]
The worst thing is, I think Kevin would actually take a larger budget [to adapt to film]. No, stop. Why would Kevin take a larger budget? Because the battles were bigger, there was more stuff going on. Seriously, there were more creatures, more travel. Yeah, I think Kevin would actually take more money than Eragon. [32]
You said that Eragon's name was originally Kevin. Was Eragon's name originally Kevin? It was. And I really regret I didn't stick with it because I think that as many books as I've sold, the series would have been at least twice as successful if it had been about the adventures of the great dragon writer Kevin. Especially just seeing Kevin on the front cover. Imagine the appeal to the modern youth. Kevin the dragon writer. I mean Eragon, it's confusing with Aragorn. Oregano. Oregon. But Kevin, Kevin stands out, Kevin's original. That's why I had to move away from it. [31]
Releasing the Kevin Cut
So do you wanna share some of those drafts with us, Christopher? Just kidding. Well, I actually had a fan reach out to me. He's one of the big members of the online fan community on Reddit and elsewhere. And he's kind of interested in some of these early versions from almost an archivist point of view, a scholarly point of view. Which is certainly an interesting idea. I mean, there is an early version of Eragon that no one's seen, that even my editor at Random House never saw. ... I cannot describe how much the Internet absolutely needs for you to put out an edition of Eragon that just says Kevin. Should this be like Mistborn or Way of Kings Prime? This is the Kevin edition of Eragon. The Kevin cut. Oh my god. It's "Eragon: Kevin's Version". ... We absolutely need Kevin's Version of Eragon. That's something we need. It's bad. It's bad. Look, there are certainly people who can look at Eragon, the version we have now, and say, "we can tell this was a younger writer." I look at it and I can tell. I could do so much more now with the material than I could then. But if you think that about the published version of Eragon, man, if you saw the unpublished version, the early version, it really is the raw writing of a homeschooled 15-year-old, who wrote a 500 page book about Kevin. I don't know, the internet is very unhinged these days. They would love this. It needs to exist somewhere on the internet. [32]

Publishing

Editing
So I wrote Eragon, and then I read the first draft and it wasn't particularly good, so I spent a good chunk of a year rewriting it as best as I could. I didn't know what I was doing but I was trying. I've heard it said that being displeased with your own work is actually a good thing because it means you know what is good work, and if you're not happy with your work because it's not good, it means you could at least have a goal to shoot for. If you read your work and you're like this is the best thing that's ever been written, you're never going to get any better. [28]
But I could see that the book needed work, so I decided to try to fix it as best I could, and I spent the better part of that year revising, rewriting, changing Kevin to Eragon. And then I gave the book to my parents and fortunately for me, they actually enjoyed what I had done. And they said, we think you have something, let's try to take it out into the world and see if anyone else wants to read it. [35]
Self-publishing
[We] decided to self-publish the book as a joint venture since we didn't know anyone in the publishing world. That was again a good chunk of a year where we were editing the book as best the three of us could. Preparing it for publication, formatting, I drew the cover. [28]
Now you have to understand, my parents were always self-employed, have always been self-employed and we were always looking for things we could work on together as a family business. And Eragon was like the perfect opportunity for that. They'd had some experience self-publishing a couple of small educational books my mom had worked on. Because she was a trained Montessori teacher, and so she was trying to use that expertise to write some material herself. But I don't even think we sold 100 copies of those. So we spent another good chunk of a year preparing the book for publication with doing more editing, doing the layout, designing the cover. [35]
The first set of 50 books showed up while we were watching Roman Polanski's Macbeth, which seemed fitting because those first 50 books were all miscut from the printer. And as a result, we had to rip the covers off, send them back for credit from the printer, and then burn the insides of the books. So we had a proper book burning in our yard, and I actually saved some of those burnt pages just as a memory of that event. [35]
Self publishing wasnā€™t as viable then as a pathway to a career as an author as it is today. Why did it work for you? Everything completely changed because of e-readers. If you wanted to read an e-book, you had to have a PDF on your computer. There were no distribution systems like Amazon and Barnes & Noble. Back then, the lowest amount you could print and not have the book be too expensive was probably about 10,000 copies. But we were fortunate because print-on-demand had just become a thing, so books were just printed as needed. Self publishing is a lot easier these days. Of course, todayā€™s marketplace is a lot more crowded as a result. [16]
Promotion
My family and I were going around the western half of the United States with the self-published edition of Eragon. I was cold calling schools, libraries, and bookstores to set up events. I was doing two to three one-hour long presentations every single day for months on end at various times. You have to understand that because my parents were self-employed, the time they took to help prepare Eragon for publication was time they weren't working on other freelance projects that would have been bringing in money. So by the time we actually had Eragon printed and in hand, if it had taken another two to three months to start turning a profit, we were going to have to sell our house, move to a city, and get any jobs we could. Because of that financial pressure I was willing to do things I probably would have been too uncomfortable to do otherwise. Like doing all those presentations. [28]
We were doing a lot of self-promotion. I was cold calling schools and libraries and talking them into letting me do presentations. And that worked pretty well because the librarians could take pre-orders for us. If we went into a bookstore, by hand selling, I could maybe sell anywhere between 13 to 40 books in a day. 42 was like the best I ever did, but usually it was around 15 or so books, which just didn't cover printing costs and travel and food and all of that. But going into the schools, we were doing about 300 books a day, which was excellent. [34]
Can you tell me a little bit about how you and your family self-published the first Eragon book and what marketing strategies you did? Oh, it was all nepotism, you know. I wouldn't have gotten published without my parents. There's nothing as powerful as a publishing company that's four people sitting around a kitchen table in the middle of rural Montana. So yeah, without Nepotism, I wouldn't have gotten published. You have to embrace something like Nepotism if you really wanna succeed in today's world. In fact, people don't realize that you actually get a Nepotism card. There's a secret club. You go to New York and there's huge network opportunities. There's branches of the club everywhere, especially strong in Hollywood, of course, in music. Taylor Swift is an example. So if you can get into the nepotism club, I won't say you're guaranteed success, but you got about 80% chance of actually making it that you wouldn't have otherwise. Do you think your mom and dad would be willing to be my mom and dad? No, absolutely not. No, no. You don't have brown hair, so it doesn't work. You have to have brown hair to be a Paolini. Okay, I'll try to find a different way in, I guess. [31]
Getting traditionally published
So you were very much looking for that partnership? Well we were wary. But the thing is is we were selling enough copies of Eragon that to scale it up we were going to have to start duplicating all the things that a regular publisher does. We were actually looking at partnering with a book packager or a book distributor just to get more copies out. To do everything a traditional publisher could do for me was a huge amount of work so it made sense to pair with Random House or someone else at that point. But it was still nerve-wracking because the book was being a success and then handing it off to another company, we didn't know if it was just going to end up in the remainder bin two weeks after it came out. [28]
People in the book world were starting to take notice because of course, if you've been to public school, you may remember the Scholastic Book Fairs and all of the Scholastic reps in the different schools were seeing me come to the schools and selling these books and hearing the kids talk about it. And it was getting attention. So we would have gotten a publisher, I would have gotten a publisher eventually. [34]
The book sold enough copies and bounced around enough that we'd heard that Scholasticā€”because Scholastic does all the Book Fairs in schools in the USā€”was interested and that we might get an offer from them. Before that happened though... [34]
Eventually another author by the name of Carl Hiaasen ended up buying a copy of the self-published edition of Eragon in a local bookstore. Which now that I'm older, I'm rather shocked at because it takes a lot to get me to buy a self-published book. It's got to look really good. [35]
Carl Hiaasen wrote the young adult book Hoot as well as many adult books. He comes up to Montana, I think he's got a vacation home here in the valley, but he was up here fly fishing and he bought a copy of Eragon for his then 12 year old son, Ryan. And fortunately for me, Ryan liked the book and Carl recommended it to Random House and it sort of bounced around among the editors for a couple of months before my editor-to-be grabbed it and said, "Yes, we will. I want to take a chance on this teenage author and we're going to offer him money for a trilogy that only exists in his head and see what happens." [34]
How did you find an agent? We had the offer from Random House, and like two days later, we had the offer from Scholastic. And so we knew we didn't know what we didn't know. My dad participated in some online self-publishing forum sort of thing. So he posted up a question and said, look, this is the situation we're in. Does anyone have any advice? And another one of the members said, "well, I was just at this publishing writing conference and there was this young agent there and I was really impressed with his presentation, or him talking about the industry." So my dad got his information online and did what you're never supposed to do, which is he called the agent directly and left this long rambling voicemail message because it was lunchtime in New York and you take your lunch breaks in New York. And only at the end of the message did he say, "oh, yes, and by the way, we have two competing offers from two publishing houses." And when I asked him, I said, "why did you do that?" He said, "well, because if he's any good as an agent, he's going to listen to the whole message before he deletes it." And we found out later that he nearly deleted the message. Because my dad started off like, "I got this teenage son, and he's written this book", and yeah, that, OK. So it was like two hours later we got a call from Simon. And Simon said overnight me a copy of Eragon and if I like it I'll represent you. And Simon has been my agent for 21 years now. [34]
It was a big risk for Random House. And it was a big risk for me because the book was successful, self-published, and we knew that giving it to a publisher, you lose the rights to a degree, and most books don't turn a profit, and it could have just ended up in the remainder bin. So what really worked in my favor is that Random House, and specifically Random House Children's Books, and specifically the imprint of Knopf, which is where I'm at were looking for their own Harry Potter, essentially. Scholastic was publishing Harry Potter. And Scholastic also gave me an offer for Eragon, but I could tell that Random House was the one that really loved the book and Scholastic was doing it because they thought it was a good business opportunity. Scholastic actually offered more money than Random House. But I went with Random House and it was the right choice. And I found out after the fact that Chip Gibson who was the head of the children's department at the time basically chose to use Eragon as sort of something to rally the troops and put the entire children's division behind it, and I was the very fortunate recipient of that love and attention. Which of course would only get you so far if people didn't enjoy reading the book. But fortunately for me, they did a great job marketing it and then people actually enjoyed the book. Which is why when people ask me how to get published, it's like, what am I supposed to say? The answer ultimately is you write a book that people want to read, and that's a facile answer, but it is true. If people want to read it, it makes everything else easier. The agent wants you, the publishers want you, and ultimately the public wants you. [34]
And I didn't realize how much was behind that email, because large publishers do not just casually say, "hey, we want to publish your book". There was a whole plan there, and they had a plan. And so they did. Eragon came out and then I had to figure out how to write a book with everyone expecting the sequel. [36]
So you kind of went and peddled your books at schools, as I understand, right? It seems to have paid off though, because it eventually landed in the hands of bestselling author Carl Hiaasen, but not right away. First, your book got in the hands of his stepson, and the kid liked it so much that he told Hiaasen about it, who then got Eragon fast-tracked with Penguin Random House. I really admire the way that you went for the weakest links, manipulating the minds of our youth and using them to shill your book for you. It's a tried and true marketing strategy from Girl Scout Cookies to coupon books, and I applaud you for your ingenuity. My biggest question here is, do you pay Carl Hiaasen's stepson the agent royalties he so rightfully deserves? He tried to collect one time, but I had to hire a couple of guys to drive him off. But, no, you always go for the weakest link. Back when I was self-published and all that I even tried to get Eragon reviewed by Entertainment Weekly, so I called up the subscription number on the back of the magazine and told them I'd made a mistake and asked them to transfer me over to corporate, and managed to get right to their book reviewer and tried to talk him into reviewing Eragon. So you always go for, as you said, the weakest link. Which is corporate. Ryan, Carl's son, though, yeah, I probably owe him a ridiculous amount of royalties. I'd say so. He made you. Oh, he did, absolutely. Without him, I'd be nothing. I guess the lesson here for aspiring authors is that it's not really about finding your target audience, necessarily. You just have to find your target prolific author's stepson and let the kid take it from there. Yeah, absolutely. As I said, that's part of the nepotism package. The sort of networking inside the industry. This is the stuff that you can never access otherwise, and you'll never get published otherwise. So it's not like you can just grow up in the middle of nowhere in Montana, self-publish a book, and then just become a success, by promoting it. You have to have connections. That's genius. I think you could have had an incredible career in designing loot boxes for mobile games based on how good you are at manipulating the world. Absolutely, microtransactions are God's work. [31]
Gaining Confidence
Was anxiety something you felt moving to this deal with Random House? Was that quite pressuring? Yes, it was a big change to go from writing for yourself as a teenager, homeschooled, living in the middle of nowhere, to knowing that there was a large audience for your next book and that they had expectations. I got criticized quite a bit, critiqued quite a bit when Eragon came out for, shall we say, my lack of experience on the technical side of things with the writing. I'd say some of those were certainly fair critiques. The great advantage of youth is that you don't know how difficult things are and you have a lot of energy. The great disadvantage of youth is you don't have experience, and there's no fixing that aside from time and effort. All of that was definitely in my head when I really started work on Eldest and it was pretty nerve-wracking quite honestly. [28]
When you finished the book, I mean your parents believed in it obviously. Did you too? Or were you like, "You know what, maybe the second book, maybe go all in on the second one?" I didn't feel like I was actually an author until my third book was published. Because the first one, well, that could be a fluke. Well, the second one, yeah, but you know. But once the third book came out, then I was like, okay, maybe I'm actually a writer. But even then, even after I finished the series, I still felt like, okay, now I have to write something that's not Eragon, just to prove that I can. So every book has been its own challenge and has been a way for me to keep feeling like I'm growing as an artist and learning to become a better and better writer. [2]
It took me, I wanna say almost 10 years to feel like I wasn't an imposter and that it wasn't just gonna get yanked away. You know what my dream was when Eragon was was going to get published by Random House? Like this was my pie in the sky because I didn't think it was going to happen. But this was my dream. I did all the math and I was like, man, if I could somehow someday sell 100,000 books, which is impossible. But man, if I could sell 100,000 books, that's a darn good living. Man, I could really make a living off that. I could support a family and 100,000 books. Man, that'd be amazing. And then it kind of took off from there. [33]
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2024.05.19 15:00 warmblanket55 Iā€™m really scared of Karma/bad dua because I said no to marrying someone

Basically my parents invited this family for a rishta months ago.
I wasnā€™t interested & said no but they did it anyway. This was because despite my mum showing no interest the guys mother kept calling & messaging for months.
We met & my entire family found the boy very strange. Especially my father thought something wasnā€™t right about him. He wasnā€™t a drug addict, had a job, seemed nice enough but we felt something was a bit off. So we said no. This happened at the end of last year
Not a single week has passed without his mother calling us. She keeps messaging my mother who doesnā€™t know what to say. My mom doesnā€™t want to block her number because sheā€™s related to a family member. But his mother constantly messages asking us to reconsider. Telling us he has found an even better job, he has now done this and that.
I didnā€™t like him. My family didnā€™t like him. But he wasnā€™t a bad person just a mismatch.
But now I feel guilty and bad. What if I get married to a monster because I rejected this guy who appeared to be nice and liked me? What if I donā€™t get married because I was supposed to marry him and I rejected him? What if I get mukafat e Amal due to this? Or get a bad dua? Itā€™s really scaring me.
submitted by warmblanket55 to pakistan [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:57 Own-Worry9880 Another vent post

//throwaway account
Hello,
For all the other parents going through this, I feel you. You are doing great and are a great role model for your child. I know I should practice what I preach, but it's hard.
I (38m) am kind of at my wits end with my wife from time to time. I consider myself as the primary caregiver of a our 2.5y old: I do all the cooking and dishes, morning daycare drop offs and afternoon pick-ups. Most of the laundry Ʈs on me, as well as cleaning. My wife (34f) does some cleaning maybe a day every 2 weeks and change the diaper once every 3 or 4 days. I do all the morning routine with the toddler and bath time. She still breastfeeds as it's the only way the boy knows to fall asleep at home. From time to time I take him with the car to sleep at noon and sometimes to fall asleep at night if it's too late.
She always tells me about fathers of her friend that are not involved, but she doesn't realize she is actually those fathers. And I feels she Sometimes feels frustrated as people ask her about cooking or different activities. She says that we both cook or gives a generic answer, but she doesn't acnowledge that I do most of the work.
We both work from home, but it feels like even when she was on maternity leave, I was still doing the same stuff, as it wouldn't matters that I actually have to work. He goes to daycare from monday to friday from 8 am to 3 or 4 PM, but there are times when he Ʈs sick and those days are mostly on me. I am in constant touch with the teacher at the nursery and the peidatrician. I give him all the suplements, as well as all the medication when he is sick. My wife goes to work a day per week and it will be probably extended to 2 days per week.
She was never a morning person, and now it's worse. Sometimes we leave the flat even before she gets up. In the weekends, most of the time she wants to stay one more hour Ʈn the bed, which is usually around 2 hours. This frusrates me a lot. I am the last one to go to sleep and the first one to go up. I need to work late or do some dishes in the evenings. I also want to spend some time with her, so sometimes it gets very late for me and I get maybe 6 hours of sleep. We cosleep and the toddler still wakes up from time to time to nurse, so I partially understand she is tired, but somehow I cannot fully accept that she is tired all the time, yet I always find the resources.
Some times I get enthusiastic about sending time together in the morning, but she wants to stay in bed one more hour and everything goes down from there. For example, today (sunday) I woke up and thought about making pancakes for everyone, as the boy mentioned pancakes yesterday. We didn't have bananas and I thought to myself once baby gets up, I will run quickly to grab some from the store. My wife woke up shortly and told me she wants to sleep one more hour, and if I want, I can go out with the kid after he eats. I was s-o disappointed about this..
I know some of these point to a communication problem, but it's so hard to tell exactly how I feel because she always takes things personally and she think I am criticising her and jufmdge ger for not being a good wife or mother.
She never spent more than 4 hours alone with the kid, and this is something else that Ʈs frustrating. I wanted to go one full day to the office when she was on maternity leave and she told me she needed help, so I shouldn't leave her alone. But I can spend 6 or 8 hours alone with the kid (and this was pretty often for me). And I know he can be very energic and strong willed. I am more active than her, so I can handle him going outdoor easier.
We don't have any help from our parents and it feels like I am single parenting 99% of the time. I feel like I should leave for a few hours and let her alone, but then I feel I would just neglect them. When I went out to see my friends, we always went to the park as I was with the kid, but she always goes alone to see her friend.
I know for sure I am part of the problem as I allowed this behavior and I think now it's too late to change anything. I try to involve the kid in everything I do, but sometimes he just wants mommy and there is nothing I can do.
I suspect she had some PPD for a few months, but she never acknowledged it. I tried to start therapy, but after one meeting, I just couldn't find the time for another session.
And there's a lot of other stuff. This is just the tip of the iceberg.
tl;dr: communication issues, frustrated with wife, don't really know how to handle the toddler stage
submitted by Own-Worry9880 to Parenting [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:54 siherbie Nightmarish Experience with Deceased Mother's Death Claim Settlement Process

So I am 37(M) and my mother (73) before she passed away on 24/12 /23. The thing that happened was that my mom ended up, having health scares one after another last year. So essentially it was first when she was told to get minor cataract surgeries, this time of month last year and both her and me were busy with her tests and later surgeries in June, July. Since she had Care insurance, she applied for her cataract surgies claim - earlier both got approved for 30k each for both surgies costing almost 50k each but then suddenly they backtracked & said one claim was rejected as place where we got surgies done, was blacklisted later. Now the single 30k claim should have been deposited, right. But nope, it still stuck & since my mom later got diagnosed with stage-4 kidney cancer in September which really shocked both me and my mom as my mom's tests have always been decent. Irrespectively, I got her on keytruda immunotherapy asap as surgeon couldn't operate till it was reduced and my mom was indeed reacting very positively to the treatment despite some issues with side-effects. However despite my best efforts, my mother suffered a brain stroke and I had to take the difficult decision of taking her off life support while dealing with another care insurance tantrum where they rejected her icu charges, so I ended up paying almost 1lakh out of my pocket and still had to pay additional 2.5lakh for further processes which was further complicated by my narcissistic sister who was only around to get her inheritance & making my life hell so I had almost no time to arrange the amount as I had only 40k left. Thus I unfortunately withdrew funds from my mom's accounts (I am Nominee & had her credentials though I also refunded them once I had a more stable mindset & recovered from fevemed issues throughout January). Either way, I initiated the Maharashtra govt ppo closure (I had refunded the amts taken from pension accounts prior to initiating paperwork) by Jan end & also approached local cbi home branch for also closing my deceased father's family pension to my mom. The branch manager directed me to this problematic deputy branch manager to whom I did admit that I had to withdraw funds from my mother's pension accounts but I have refunded them once I gathered resources(basically my sibling & family members are useless besides the fact that my sister has indulged in some criminal offenses like harassing me & my mom both before & after her death, etc while said family members did nothing). Since my mother also took 3 fds earlier in 2023, the deputy branch manager wanted me to break them & told me that individual account won't be closed & only her CIF would be directly deactivated. Since it was only few months to fds maturity & state govt pension closure was yet to occur - I told her that I will file for death claim settlement once state govt pension is closed & excess pension is recovered by them as deactivating the CIF will make this troublesome & a legal case. So she agreed to wait till state govt pension is closed and I gather all necessary documents in the meantime. Luckily state govt treasury did close the ppo & withdrew excess pension by 19th March while I also managed to transfer most of the mutual funds where I am Nominee. However since state govt treasury office (it's in another city from where I live & reasonably far), didn't give me letter of closure/confirmation - I was asked to wait for 1 month by local treasury officer (as financial year closing was approaching) which I informed to said deputy branch manager. During this time, I also had to deal with legal paperwork as the lawyer my mom knew, didn't inform her or me to register it & also wasted my time in March. So I had to look for other ways to inherit one immovable property (my sibling holds 16.66% share and I have 83.34% as per my mom's wish to inherit the property as per her will), one problematic mf transfer which I accidentally botched by editing Nominee details (still not sure as my mental health was seriously impaired in Jan/Feb & I also have same scheme, so not sure how it happened as there's no email confirmation except for an otp I found though I am not sure why I would update nominee details when I am already nominee there & even mentioned in will). Since UTI rejected both of my transmission claims so I am waiting for my current lawyer to complete the gift deed & apply for heirship certificate at municipality for filing my deceased mom's ITR. Also please note that despite timely updates to deputy branch manager, she let the FDs renew without my permission & has been acting dubious besides acting very rudely with me. So situation is,
  1. I have filed compliant with cbi bank (or rather couple of them as again, I wasn't informed properly nor received proper feedback from bank). Now I will be collecting the FDs physical certificates from branch & wait for resolution as said deputy branch manager is very suspicious(like asking me to file false FIR for online FDs whose online receipts I already have or saying there will be penalty for breaking autorenewed FDs that strangely got renewed on maturity dates without any prior indication & some things not adding up with new scheme plus the whole confusing me with different instructions). Though luckily I have atleast closed state govt pension bank account & it was transferred to my account (it's at same problematic home branch) on 3rd May & de-activated my mom's CIF. So as bank resolution will take additional 15days to come, should I approach branch with resolution & LHC to minimize further problems despite being Nominee.(there's an error in relationship in cbi's savings account where my name & details are there but relationship is daughter instead of son but I already made Rs.100 self-affidavit as per dubious deputy branch manager instructions & all other documents including death claim form).
 
  1. Applying for my mom's final ITR is necessary & I have already submitted most financial statements to my CA to compute including the TDS deducted on the FDs since I have been given July-end deadline. Plus as my mother & me spent more than 10lakh+ for her cancer treatment, I am hoping that I will get some deductible relief on her final itr besides tds. The issue is that I am still lacking any legal heirship document that will allow me to register as assessee for filing my mother's ITR. I did ask another bank where I am also nominee for mom's account, for issuing bank letter confirming Nominee details but they refused. However hopefully as I am going to execute a registered gift deed with help of my new lawyer that will mention my mom's unregistered will, I am hoping it allows me to register for the ITR. Otherwise I will have to approach local municipality office for issuing surviving family membeheirship certificate once gift deed allows me to initiate transfer property to my name.
 
  1. There are still some untransferred assets such as a SBG linked to my mom's account besides the UTI scheme that's linked to same account(for uti, I already have most paperwork ready except that they asked for legal document that confirms relationship between me and my mother so while I can submit my passport copy though feeling it's better if will gets registered during gift deed process as it's mentioned there). Then there's the care insurance claim associated with same account & taken by bank officials of same bank yet it came to my attention that Care apparently messed my mom's name multiple times while issuing the policy & the claim hasn't processed as policy name & bank account name don't match (it's only a difference in middlename and could have been conveyed to my mom when she approached them multiple times). I did ask my lawyer regarding this & as amount is only 30k, he has asked me not to think about claim as for now as Care doesn't seem sincere as they haven't given it in writing that they will issue claim if I submit LHC/Registered Will with other documents. So while I will get SBG once I close the account & also uti mf scheme (hopefully), I am not sure if I should file a consumer case against Care (as an employee even misbehaved with my mom & the claim situation feels really fraudulent) or just hope that Care would honor the claim once I submit the documents.(they also only mentioned sending documents over email so again felt weird)
 
Overall all these incidents have seriously affected my health and frankly I need a break for myself as I am still struggling with my grieving (I saw my mom die 3 times & the family drama still triggers my cptsd though I am not suicidal or having med issues unlike in Jan besides still unable to take some personal time off due to these commitments). I also apologize if this post ended up too long or having details all over the place as I am still trying to piece together as much information I have as I do have written journal records of the paperwork & events that occurred though I forgot to list down some details here & there due to trying to manage everything by my own.
submitted by siherbie to IndiaInvestments [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:53 Tricky_Shallot_9849 WIBTA to insist that our child takes my last name first?

For context: Iā€™m (33F) from a country in which we use two last names. Usually, the fatherā€™s last name is used first. Up to a few months ago, the law didnā€™t allow the motherā€™s last name to be used first. It does now.
I was 9 weeks pregnant when we found out that the law changed and now allows parents to decide which last name is used first, this is my first pregnancy. I mentioned it to my husband who immediately shut me down, he got angry and wouldnā€™t consider it. I said well, if you wonā€™t hear about it, I should at least have a bigger say when it comes to naming the child; he didnā€™t like it, but agreed.
A few weeks later we found out that we are having a boy. We had a list of names that we had chosen together. From the list, I said I liked ā€œxā€ the most. He wasnā€™t particularly fond of ā€œxā€, but later said he liked it, so we agreed to name our son ā€œxā€.
To clarify, I didnā€™t impose, nor made the decision for both of us. I just said I liked ā€œxā€ the most, and was actually happy when he said he liked it too. He has since told me how happy he is that we chose to name our son ā€œxā€, we get a lot of compliments for it.
Iā€™m 26 weeks pregnant now. I have a long list of symptoms that Iā€™ve experienced and am now entering my third trimester, so starting to experience new ones and getting uncomfortable. I will have to go through child birth in a few months, and will be breastfeeding our son after. FYI Iā€™m happy and calm, just acknowledging the physical/mental strain/responsibility that comes along with pregnancy/motherhood.
Husband has been supportive. He has not missed a doctors appointment, took over household responsibilities while I was physically ill (first trimester), talks to baby in bellyā€¦ what he can do, heā€™s doing.
As the pregnancy advances, the last name thing has come to mind again. Iā€™d really like to use mine first. Donā€™t get me wrong, I know both parentsā€™ role is important, but feel women should be allowed credit for the unique role that we have in all thisā€¦ as itā€™s my first pregnancy, I wasnā€™t really aware of the implications when we had that first talk (and yet to fully find out).
I mentioned it briefly to my husband yesterday. He said we have an agreement and that ā€œIā€ chose our sonā€™s name. So now expects me to hold my end of the agreement. From my point of view, we both chose the name, but he is now saying that he wasnā€™t fond of ā€œxā€ and only said yes because of our agreement.
Iā€™m frustrated and sad, such ā€œagreementā€ was only made in the first place cause he wouldnā€™t talk about nor consider my request. Heā€™s been first hand witness of my pregnancy experience, and I feel heā€™s accommodating the name choosing to his convenience, which I genuinely feel we did together.
Heā€™s also saying that Iā€™m only insisting as I have a ā€œfancyā€ last name (itā€™s Irish and uncommon here, his is Spanish and ā€œcommonā€ for the country). Iā€™ve explained it has nothing to do with that, heā€™s convinced that it does.
WIBTA to insist?
submitted by Tricky_Shallot_9849 to AITAH [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:51 ez_psych Did I just dodge a bullet ?

Had this girl that works near by who i was super into and she was super into me too constant flirting constant IOIs exchanging texts laughing etc etc
Anyway i was always chill yet keen on her and liked her until she only recently revealed to me she has had a boyfriend of 4 years who she is unhappy with (she never told me at all until me and her started getting closer recently)
I told her its fine if she unhappy with him but that she would have to be single (i.e. be broken up with him) before i would consider dating her because Iā€™m not down to be a tree branch.
Simple answer right ?
Wrong.
This answer has made her completely flip and become absolutely psychotic ever since. She has completely flipped throwing tantrums acting like a toddler who didā€™nt get their toy
Since then she has become extremely super passive aggressive, rude, constantly gaslighting me, and gone and recently started rumours behind my back and constantly being extremely extremely aggressive.
Here I am thinking I am doing the right thing (and i still think i do) by telling her thats its neither right nor healthy to monkey branch between relationships like that (my flirtations interactions with her were honestly because i was under the assumption she was single the whole time)
Anyway my question isnā€™t about my choice of answer to her, my question is more about why or how psychotic she has gone, with the aggression and rumours and transforming into a demon at the slightest pushback ?
How can a simple push back trigger such an adverse extreme reaction ?
Me and my friends were discussing how my answer worked out in a way because it revealed to me a side of her character i never knew existed unti when she didnt get her way and man it is extremely nasty.
One of my friends who is a Psychologist say she might be a covert narcissist
And All my other friends have said something ainā€™t right about her for her to go nuts like that because my answer isnt even that bad (or bad at all for that matter) - so iā€™m posting it here just incase iā€™m in an echo chamber of friends who just agree witt me lol
To be honest this happened recently so im shell shocked. Theres also a chance ill run into her during lunch break. Should I just avoid her when i see her ? So again my question is Im curious why would she go psychotic like that after such a small answer like that ? And am i right in assuming as taking this as i dodged a bullet ?
Thanks
submitted by ez_psych to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:46 Revolutionary_Ad5835 AITA for not seeing parents or brothers perspective

for context; I (19F), my sister(15F), and our parents moved from England to Australia 8 years ago while my brother (24M, same dad and, a different mum from me and my sister) stayed with his girlfriend in the UK. My Brother fell out with his mum when he was young. He visited with his girlfriend about 5 years ago and they just did not get along with my parents. There were always arguments between them, beginning at least a year before this visit, and in the end, my father (who was an alcoholic at the time, a raging drunk, who still has issues controlling his anger but we'll get to that) had a massive yell at them over another one of their many small disagreements. They both said many hurtful things and in the end, my father told them to f off, which they took literally, packed up, and left that night back to England.
There was no contact for about 4 years, apart from occasional small talk between me, my sister, my brother, and his girlfriend, which was still awkward due to their sudden departure and the previous arguments. About a year ago my father started sending messages to my brother trying to catch up, which resulted in some small talk exchanged between them as well.
About 3 months ago, my brother was telling our father about how he lost his IT job and both he and his girlfriend were having health issues that impacted their everyday life(not sure if I'm allowed to get into them). My brother then called my mother out of the blue, which was a shock due to the no contact between them, and asked to speak to both her and our dad. He basically told them that they are coming to Australia as they will have more luck with their health issues here and possibly better job opportunities for my brother, his girlfriend has an online job which she can do anywhere.
They arrived in Australia and stayed in an Airbnb and a hotel for some time, and after struggling to find a place asked my parents if they could sleep on the floor for a bit while they got back on their feet. They bought an air mattress and set up in an area close to the kitchen and the rest of us 4 have our own rooms. (Our parents have been split up for about 5 years but we still all live together due to general convenience in our current financial situation, and we feel better being closer as my father had recent suicide attempts and intense mental health struggles.) During this time, my brother would do Uber delivery and his girlfriend would do her remote job.
For about a month and a half, they stayed and there was very little communication between our parents, and my brother and his girlfriend. Our parents constantly complained to me and my sister about them contributing nothing financially or around the house. They also said that they felt overcrowded and had lost their space. Our father is a tradesman and found a few days that my brother could help him out on building sites to earn some extra cash. During this time my father talked about how his business doesn't have a website and my brother offered to design and construct it for him and my brother says they agreed on the same hourly price as the laboring.
My father told my mother briefly about how my brother was working on the website. He spent many hours a week, and late nights, for three weeks working on the website and then sent my mother the invoice. My mother took this as a shock, and an insult to their hospitality as they had asked my brother and his girlfriend for no financial contribution. My parents then sent a message asking if they could organise a time to chat about them paying rent and giving them a deadline of 4 weeks. They were made aware of the deadline in the text, but this conversation never happened and we are still unaware about the outcome of the payment on the website.
My brother's girlfriend stays up late working on the laptop and my brother goes out delivery driving, sometimes not arriving home until the early morning. Our parents would get up for their early starts and loudly complain about how insulting it is to see them "sleeping all day" while they go out and work hard. This constant complaining both loudly so that they could hear, and privately to me and my sister continued for a few more weeks.
A week ago my father got up for a really early start around 5 am and began slamming doors, throwing pots and pans from the kitchen near to where they were sleeping, and playing the TV on the highest possible volume, in his state of anger he was flipping up the rude finger several times at my brother and his girlfriend while they were asleep, which my brother woke up in the middle of. My brother went to ask my mother if he had done something wrong and he was brushed off. Me and my sister asked our mother why they were being treated like this, to which we got "We're just sick of it", however, there was little communication between anyone about what the real issue was.
They ended up leaving that day as justifiably that wasn't an environment they wanted to be in. They found some house sits, me and my sister are planning to catch up with them frequently unlike last time. Later that day, we received a long message on a group chat with all 6 of us, from my brother stating how our father handled his issues with them poorly and that he needed mental help, our mother then replied on the group chat about how disrespectful it was to send that message to the whole family and removed herself and our father from the group chat. There has been no further communication that me and my sister are aware of.
We just want to know who is the asshole as we don't know how to feel towards both sides when moving forward, and would appreciate an outside perspective or advice

submitted by Revolutionary_Ad5835 to AITAH [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:44 WellThatsPrompting Gave 7mo. baby first cold 4 days before first flight. I'm beside myself.

Welp, title says it all. I started showing symptoms for a cold Tuesday night, but brushed it off as allergies because I threw away an old carpet that day that was filled with all the usual sneeze and cough ingredients.
Wednesday was daddy daycare while the wife worked and because I still felt a little something something I was extra careful around the little guy: washing hands as often as possible, no kisses, and as little direct face-to-face contact as I could manage - you know, just to be safe.
Turns out it was a cold and it hit me like a freight train Thursday, Friday and into Saturday. I stayed locked away in the bedroom doing the usual home care of fluids and rest and did my best to keep the kiddo safe from it. Really, the only saving grace through the misery of it was that he hadn't caught it.
And then, Saturday night, just as I feel I'm starting to turn a corner and feel good about my precautionary ways, the boy wakes up in the middle of the night from a coughing fit. I've never felt like a bigger piece of shit in my entire life. All I wanted was to spare him from this, and I failed.
We're supposed to fly out Wednesday and I'm wicked worried about what that will do to him if he's still got this, which looks increasingly likely based on quick research.
I know, rationally, that this shouldn't be a huge deal, but I can't stop myself from spiraling on what could come from this initial cold and then with the travel tacked on. I feel like a complete and utter failure of a parent because I know that I gave this to him and that I've doomed my son to a miserable first flight at best, and lord knows what future complications at worst.
Any of y'all ever felt anything like this?
submitted by WellThatsPrompting to daddit [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:43 DumButFun Zach Bia & Yachty - The duo that nobody saw coming

Zach Bia & Yachty - The duo that nobody saw coming
Like every good post, this one starts with a Mike ChehadƩ tweet. In this cryptic Tweet, Mike references Zack Bia twice before sharing a screenshot this screenshot of 2 stops on one of Drake's tours
https://x.com/ChehadeTheKing/status/1789746981864145365/photo/1
But Mike has blanked something out just below where he cropped, something important
https://imgur.com/a/jyGlbad
Yachty's name. Why? Mike is telling us what he can't tell us.
What nobody can tell us for legal reasons, which is why they need us to work this out by ourselves.
https://preview.redd.it/y19tgm0pod1d1.png?width=804&format=png&auto=webp&s=7e22844998e9a4dab5f5f00ce9d08905040b9c9e
To understand what's going on, you first need to read this: https://imgur.com/a/darkkenny-list-canadian-ccWJwtp
YACHTY: The motive
Drake has stolen music from Yachty in the past. Yachty made a reference track for Drake and Drake stole is bar for bar while giving no credits. Is that how you treat your friends?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gbj3My2_6UY
Why would he take that? it's not like Yachty needed to bend over for Drake, considering he had this banger releasing mere months later:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let%27s\_Start\_Here#:\~:text=Let's%20Start%20Here%20is%20the,2021%20mixtape%20Michigan%20Boy%20Boat.
BIA: The motive
In a recent article, Bia talks about his future plans for his own personal music career, this is obvious waffle paid article type shit, he might be using his digital marketing knowledge to boost his relevance.
https://imgur.com/a/2mBP2us
It seems like Bia is trying to solidify a brand for himself aside from Drake. He's Hollywood's golden boy, he's super well connected and would survive just fine without Drake.
He knows what's happening behind the scenes with Drake, the open case, the trillion dollar crypto scandal that we'll be telling you everything about soon.
He's ready to jump ship, and in Yachty he's found an accomplice.
YACHTY & BIA
Yachty and Bia have at least 3 songs together, this is one of their latest: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPZ2nYUiAYw
They have a good chemistry on record and make good tracks. Nobody would notice how often Zach and Yachty actually work together.
YACHTY - the ride-
In 'the ride-' by Yachty he says
Hoo, uh, don't ask no questions on the ride Makin' eye contact is suicide, yeah When I'm alone with my thoughts, I'm terrified That's why I need you here, just by my side, yeah A quick zoom to the moon, come along and ride, yeah
This is a very important verse but for now we're just interested in "Makin' eye contact is suicide"
Remember how XXX got killed, how the robbery went down?
They had him at gunpoint until, allegedly, X locked eyes with the shooter.
In a VladTV interview, 9lokkNine said he was arrested the day of X's murder. He was actually arrested a vehicle while leaving the general area of X's death.
"Hoo, uh, don't ask no questions on the ride"
We think Yachty could be referring to the murder of X and making the link to 9lokk speeding away. We think Zack Bia and he have talked about all this.
How is Drake involved in this?
9lockknine was appointed as partner at Dreamcrew (formerly Omerta) and listed as co-producer for Euphoria (we'll get to that later). Just not under his real name.
9lockknine has been using the name Adel Nur (an anogram for Launder) to secretly receive payments from Drake.
https://imgur.com/a/ZKmVNUu
Zack Bia knew about the inner workings of this deal.
Now back to Euphoria, or should I say EUPHORIA?
We believe Dot was referencing Euphoria the TV show to encourage people to look into one of the 2 producers, Adel Nur (real identity 9lokknine)
But not only that, Yachty was meant to be helping SSGKobe on his album, Euphoria.
https://preview.redd.it/zcj4l5eqld1d1.png?width=1051&format=png&auto=webp&s=d38811911e82f3120f279f619bdfb09f1450a1bd
But SSGKobe did some nasty shit and Yachty didn't wanna be associated with him anymore.
https://preview.redd.it/8ka6skarld1d1.png?width=1384&format=png&auto=webp&s=1f6094b379a6fd043b87ddeb515dfa7e5b1ae7f2
So Dot was also stealing the future album title from a sexual predator. Badass.
We're not slow, right?
Have you ever... paid 500k to an open case?
https://preview.redd.it/wk6qu620md1d1.png?width=877&format=png&auto=webp&s=36d5cc0d4600c16154f8ce8f58e17e61867cbd90
Now we know Kendrick meant something more about YNW Melly, he wasn't just talking about murdering two friends, Melly is the link to 9lockk and Drake for FUCK SAKES
https://preview.redd.it/gsvzzat2md1d1.png?width=931&format=png&auto=webp&s=e4b10149196b556840be7454d3b2271cc53b2f88
They said Drake hired them!
https://preview.redd.it/45dka4m4md1d1.png?width=925&format=png&auto=webp&s=cadbdb0d193039acdc01f0d0afb74874dbcea187
The big point is that Robert Allan's involvement got evidence that was thrown out re-introduced.
https://preview.redd.it/fyrhazjpmd1d1.png?width=755&format=png&auto=webp&s=3c11d5dba5aa89053207196b31b96801bd8fb551
This is what he would've snitched on, it was only reported as settled in 2019, but Layla Lace says this happened in January 2018, 5 months before X's murder.
https://preview.redd.it/g61ilje8nd1d1.png?width=675&format=png&auto=webp&s=edf5a68eb6b7ba508288a1a85e230502e602bcfe
X, coming from his background (he claimed abuse growing up living with Bruno in his book), would not look kindly on this.
https://preview.redd.it/wdf5adkend1d1.png?width=840&format=png&auto=webp&s=a9038db91fa92b09aa467a9a442cd1c3ba62f674
The fact Abel Nur is actually 9lockk is the key here. It gives Drake motive, resources, and a means of connecting real killers to the dudes who robbed that fucking car.
X told us. I believe him. RIP X.
https://yardhype.com/drakes-lyrics-if-he-held-his-tongue-on-that-live-he-be-alive-was-aimed-at-xxxtentacion-according-to-fans/
DRAKE EVEN FUCKING TOLD US
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qmcJe3xXVQ
DAYLYT TOLD US
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48BIME7sM4I
NOW WATCH THIS 9lokknine VladTV video and tell me this guy doesn't seem guilty AND that Vlad doesn't clearly suspect him.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5L3IuUHxQQk
Big thankyou to my friend RB
RIP XXXTentacion
https://preview.redd.it/z2qa1gc8md1d1.png?width=643&format=png&auto=webp&s=c9eb023008270b8719edcfb06266a30795ad7ebe
submitted by DumButFun to DarkKenny [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:41 InternationalWar6558 Am I being unreasonable for expecting my friend to ask before inviting randoms to our regular dinner dates?

I am a 39 year old female. My friend and I (43F) have been having dinner regularly on a Friday night for over a year. It started when she was going through a bad breakup and was spending the night without her child while she was with her ex. It was really good for the both of us so we kept doing it. We take turns picking each other up and sometimes we like to do a bit of a late night grocery shop afterwards which is awesome because itā€™s always quiet. The nights are really good for me too because I donā€™t have any family, have only a small circle of friends and since COVID I work more from home so can go days without human contact. It can be very lonely so itā€™s great to have this regular social contact. Unfortunately my friend has this habit of inviting other people to our dinners without telling me and it really pisses me off. All of a sudden our routine will be out, we canā€™t travel together because sheā€™s picking someone else up. They are inevitably one of her teacher friends which means they have that in common and Iā€™m often left having nothing to add to the discussion because I donā€™t work in that profession. I have known her for a very long time and she has always had this need to ā€œsaveā€ people. Last year she got the idea in her head that her boss was lonely and despite having lived in the area for 6 years hadnā€™t made any connections and how sad was that. So all of a sudden her boss was attending our dinners without her even asking me if that was ok. The whole ā€œher boss was lonelyā€ story was total bs, she was linked with several church groups, regularly performed with amateur singers and worked a full time job so had plenty of opportunities to make connections with people if she wanted to. I had absolutely nothing in common with her and for the few months she joined us there was very little conversation for me to be involved in. Finally she moved away and we went back to our normal routine. Last night we had dinner and my friend mentioned she went out the night before with a colleague who had just been through a breakup. Once again this person had a sob story about not having been out of the house in 8 years (again something I find hard to believe since she has foster kids and I know from my own line of work that they are entitled to regular respite). So all of a sudden my friend tells me she has invited her to join us for dinner but she has said she can only come every second week. I didnā€™t say anything because I donā€™t like confrontation but I was absolutely livid. I think itā€™s very rude to invite someone to a social event without asking the others involved if theyā€™re ok with it, especially when they are a stranger. And if she had asked I never would have said no, but I think it shows a disregard for our friendship and the time we spend together. I mean why is she always so intent on having others there, is my company that bad? Itā€™s actually been a really common theme over the years of her trying to fix other peopleā€™s problems and I have been put to the side. So am I being unreasonable and should I just get over it? Or should I say something?
submitted by InternationalWar6558 to friendship [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:39 Due_Bet1802 What do you want next from CK3?

So I just passed the 1000 hour mark in CK3 and it's safe to say its one of my favourite games ever. However there are still some things and areas that need a look into and I was wondering what you guys would want most? Here are some things I reckon they should add in, in descending order of importance:
1: TRADE!!!... or at least the illusion of trade. Historically trade was a MAJOR motivator in a lot of conquests throughout the era. The Viking invasions of the Rus are an excellent example of this and I just jumped into a game in that region and I am just craving some trade mechanics so much here. It's sad that we can't do things like make trade agreements and build trading posts as the Vikings, Italians and others did a lot of that kind of stuff. I know there are mods that add things like this but Sinews and DTR don't really work anymore in my experience. At least not alongside other mods that I consider essential. I think being able to set up trading links with other empires would be great and they could evolve over time potentially even making your economy, at least partially, dependent on it like it was in Venice or the Rus.
2: Nomad Rework. In the game before the current one I'm in I played a dynasty of turks who invaded Persia and got involved in the Intermezzo, basically recreating the Seljuks. I love the idea of playing as a nomadic tribe but the sad reality is is that playing nomadic is no different than playing one of the slavic or baltic tribes, and I just find it kind of dull at the moment. (Just as a little sidenote though, having access to horse archers is absolutely the best part of playing nomadic. I've played this game since release and I've only just come to realise how goddamn OP these things are. You get a decent general with some horse archers in and one battle later its pack your bags boys wars over.)
3: Different Government Types. This kind of links into number 2 as a nomadic government type would be great but I really want to be able to play as some kind of republic. I know you can technically make elective monarchies and stuff, but it's pretty barebones. A few months ago I would of also talked about the Byzantine empire but it looks like there's going to be a new gov type especially for them in the upcoming DLC.
4: Make Your Own Holy Sites. This one is purely for RP reasons. I think it would be cool to be able to build massive cathedrals or temples or what have you on your especially picked land. Again going back to my Rus game, if I wanted to go the historical route of turning Christian I'd kind of want a holy site in Kiev.
Anyway those are a few things that I'd like to see, but I'm very curious to see what the community at large would like from future DLCs/updates. Let me know your thoughts!
submitted by Due_Bet1802 to CrusaderKings [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:38 Jesuslover34 Seoulism part 1

It was the start of a new year, and with that Seouls 4 major school saw a large increase of new students. Everyone was talking about the gang who used to rule over Seoul suddenly disappearing, and nobody was taking ownership of it. (read the Extra info at the bottom, it will help a lot, and it'll explain how things work for new people)
---------------------------North Seoul High--------------------------- A tall, blonde, guy was making jokes with a few of his classmates, most of them where about the Soviet union and WW2. Ivan Alexander (u/Away_excitement3116)
In the corner of class a tall, silver haired boy was training without his shirt on, a few watched while some tried to look away from his muscular build. Klein (u/ProfessionalLuck268)
Simply sitting at his desk doing his schoolwork was one boy, most would says he's normal. But then again, being to only normal guy makes you kind of special. Yuseong (u/Outer-god369)
A tall black dude was talking with his friend, trying to improve his language skills as h had only recently come to Korea. His shirt hiding his very muscular build. (u/TheGloryBe_throwaway)
There was a large group of students talking, making jokes, laughingand just having a good time, in the center of attention was the short curly haired- Ren Yuzaki (u/LeoIsAngry)
There was a boy sleeping on his desk, standing next to him was another boy dressed just like a body guard. He would scare off anyone who got close. The boy sleeping was Kai Edward Tristan (u/KaiAugustInsi)
Some skinny guy was watching the popular newtube channel (How To Fight), he was inspired by Hobin due to the fact they both got bullied a lot. He now wats to be just like him. Kim Suho (u/federal_tip9311)
--------------------------South Seoul High----------------------------
The class watched as an boy with Orange hair, and black leather gloves was polishing his newest Trophy. It's seemed like that was the only thing interesting him at all. Dexter (u/Greensvenner1234)
A short and skinny boy is playing with his Lego bricks. While most see it as immature he's doing it to get a better understanding on a buildings stability and weak points. As he loves working on construction sites. Seok Mujuk (u/domengoenfuego)
Sitting in some expensive designer clothes, was a boy who normally couldn't afford it. But after beating up some bullies who harrased others, and then them offering him their money he gladly took it. Kai Wang (u/wesjsndsjsnss)
"Come and hit me!" a Dude screamed while his Classmates punched and kicked him, yet he was still standing as if nothing had happened at all to him. Lam Lee (u/Dull-tax-4713)
Sitting away from all the noice, enjoying his favorite manga was Kim Jin (u/random_guy_Q)
Amongst the people who tried to punch Lam Lee was one boy who actually manged to hurt him a bit, he didn't notice was Lam was hiding it but his attacks where effective. Adam (u/Theman2326)
---------------------------East Seoul High------------------------------ A boy with gum in his hair was playing games on multiple phones, yet he obviously didn't enjoy it. That's because he was forced to farm stuff for bullies. Su-Jin Park (u/RainProfessional8105)
People stared as there was some guy who brought a few stray cats and dogs with him to class. Some people enjoyed the animals, others saw it as weird. Zanegs (u/Warrenchae)
Some nerds ran up to an average sized boy with white hair, calling him sir and giving him some money, he told them that they are safe as long as the money keeps flowing Hyuk Hwang (u/Rutsch3r)
There was someone silently talking to himself, but not silent enough. Other people could hear h but they didn't understand what he was saying. Myul (u/Longjumping-date-367)
He was not a student of this school, yet he would still come here everyday. He fought someone drunk dude from this school who he now follows around. Ran Yong-Su (u/Any-Lingonberry-3589)
Some drunk dude, he got I trouble a lot for drinking while on school grounds. Beat up some guy once while drunk, who's now following him around. Chao Ming (u/Even-Caramel-9309)
Staying way from other, watching movies about martial arts while simultaneously reading a martial arts magazine was Forgettable (u/Forgettabletiger)
--------------------------West Seoul High-----------------------------
A football (it's called football not soccer) just ended in a 30-0 win. His teammates where all gathered around him praising him for his amazing shots and dribbling. Hyoma Kurona (u/Fungiloo)
Skipping school so he could work in his parents teashop, was a boy who was fascinated by his Chinese roots. Vincent Lee (u/Base_loose)
A boy was going around with a group of scary looking guys. He would try to beat up people and then have them join him. He war cruel to them yet made them yet on rare occasions asked if they are hurt. Jintaro Suzuki (u/SlashDaOne)
Talking to his teacher as if they where best friends was one boy who didn't care about social rankings and as everyone as a friend. Hae Minsu (u/Real_Abrocoma_9377)
After unsuccessfully flirting with a few girls, this boy decided that training his body again was the best way to get their attention. Jin Na (u/Causality_A)
This boy gets along with many people, yet he gets nervous when you ask him about his glove and weirdly large pinky fingers. Ryuk Eun-Soo (u/Elegant-Ad-2431)
---------------------------------Extra Info----------------------------------
Here are a few rules and things you should keep in mind.
  1. How does anything work? Just make a comment saying what your characters is doing or what he wants to do. I will respond with a scenario. Onec your scenario is finished I'll tell you, you can act again in the next part.
If you fight another OC, it will be put into the next part as these are special fights.
  1. You're allowed to do anything, you want as long as ng as it's in character.
  2. You can be permanently crippled, lose limbs and die.
  3. Random encounters are a thing. They have different rarities, common ones are like you meeting some thugs, while more rare encounters could result in you meeting people like Gun.
  4. After an successful encounter you're rewarded with all kinds of thing, stat buffs, special items, Uniqe Abilities. The more rare the encounter is, the better the rewards. You can also fail the encounter.
  5. Stats are important even outside of fighting. You can raise every single stat by training or from rewards.
Strength: how strong your hits are, how much you can lift/Carry around. And other physical tasks. Speed: how fast you attack, move and think. Potential: is basically how fast you grow from training, Someone with higher potential will gain more than someone with low potential from the same amount of training. Intelligence: your battle IQ as well as your overall IQ. If your int is low your plans will almost always fail even if your plan is really good and detaild. And someone with high int will almost always be successful even if their plan is bad. Endurance: Your Defense, and how much energy you have.
Stats are also hidden, this is so you have to be careful around every person you don't know. High Intelligence character might find out your stats. And some cards also let you view stats.
  1. If you want to do something in secret DM me. This way only you and I will know about it. This could be a betrayal or maybe a secret plan.
7.1 Fight other OCs is something risky, the winner can decide what to do with you. They can to the things mentioned in (2) but they can also try to recruit you.
7.2 Beating an OC will give Special rewards. So it's encouraged by keep in mind that you can suffer a lot if you fail.
If you don't remember something about your OC just DM me
submitted by Jesuslover34 to OCism_official [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:35 Ok_Welder_5593 Women prefer to date and marry men they think are less attractive than they are.

I think a lot of good looking men, or men who grew up being complimented over their looks, are assumed to have bad or dull personalities before opening their mouth. I also think they are judged a little more harshly than men who donā€™t have as many traits one could deem as ā€œgood-looking,ā€ like a sharp jawline, prominent cheekbones, symmetry and proportional features, eyelash length, etc.
We all know what good-looking is; itā€™s why thereā€™s so much overlap in the features of actors and why so many actors have so-called, ā€œlookalikes.ā€ Men know what a good looking woman looks like.
I notice that my girl-friends NEVER choose the man they are most attracted to, which is always a man that has these features and looks like he could be on camera.
Itā€™s never really about them having a bad personality, being unavailable, etc. They take themselves out of the running so to speak by making assumptions, and they HATE, hate, hate, hate, the idea of competing with another woman, which is a wee bit hypocritical as some of them entertain multiple men, but theyā€™re well within their right to do so.
I love my friends, but I think they set themselves up for marriage failure and disappointment by doing this. Iā€™m not saying looks are everything, but how does a personality set itself apart from anotherā€™s, when both are ā€œgood?ā€ I see this sentiment online, and itā€™s an interesting one, but I think looks alter how ppl judge your personality.
I have one friend, letā€™s call her Tasha; she thought a keynote speaker at one of our latest events (both event planners at same org) was extremely handsome. And objectively speaking, he was. He gave a great speech. During our networking happy hour, I invite him over to our table. Heā€™s single too.
Heā€™s charismatic, hilarious, heā€™s a good listener, and sheā€™s smiling during the whole situation, but itā€™s a closed lip, squint the eyes smile; one of those smiles you give a kid when he thinks heā€™s done something genius but it wasnā€™t. But she starts doing something uncharacteristic; she only turns to me and talks, and sheā€™s low volume. It could almost be classified as rude.
Sheā€™s a lot more reserved than she usually is around this guy. I asked her afterward whether she liked the guy and she kept it simple in a way where she made it known that it was an uncomfortable subject; a very curt, ā€œyeah.ā€
Now, weā€™ve hung out with men that Tasha NEVER thought were cute, and were much more crass in nature, less motivated and unhygienic, but she would act like they were the greatest thing since sliced bread. However, post hang out, she would complain about them.
This is behavior that most of my girl-friends exhibit. It could be a regional US thing, maybe.
I think many women need to feel comfortable above all else for a relationship to work for them. I think some men can be ā€œtoo completeā€ for some women to deal with.
Thoughts?
submitted by Ok_Welder_5593 to TrueUnpopularOpinion [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:33 Akza-3 Despite having a good career Iā€™m quite stupid really. Iā€™m almost certain Iā€™m at least neurodivergent. Any advice on where I go from here?

Please understand Iā€™m not looking for sympathy and before people start saying ā€œyouā€™re not stupidā€ ā€œhow can you say that about yourselfā€ Iā€™ve literally been called stupid by friends, classmates, and family since I was 4 years old. Iā€™m in my early 30s now and can say Iā€™ve without doubt done stupid things so I donā€™t want to hear people say I shouldnā€™t call myself and idiot when I am. I feel like Iā€™m a functioning person with no common sense whatsoever causing me to get by in life while being a complete idiot along the way.
Now, having said that I managed to get by in school, despite my stupidity and I obtained overall average grades. Afterwards I went university and graduated with a below average marks but admittedly this was due to me doing literally no work when I was in university. I pretty much spent at a push 10% of my time studying. Foolish I know and was doing a challenging degree.
Despite that set back I pursued a career in banking and so far earn above the London average salary. Things on paper donā€™t actually seem to be bad right? Yet I do stupid things from time to time. In addition to this my memory is bad, particularly my short term memory. Itā€™s caused me humiliation over the years and even as of recent. It makes me so depressed when I think of all the dumb things Iā€™ve done over the years and feel like Iā€™d be the happiest person in the world if not for my stupidity. I feel like Iā€™d be sooo much more confident in myself if not for my stupidity. Below are some examples of the stupid and weird things Iā€™ve done over the years:
1) Bad memory - will do something and forget a couple mins later at times; like forgetting the number of the locker I put my gym clothes in, when I was learning to drive I kept forgetting the basics such as putting the handbrake fully down. There are times where Iā€™d forbid myself to say something only to stupidly say it a few minutes later. - there are more examples I could use but simply put this is my primary issue and itā€™s gotten a little worse as Iā€™ve gotten older.
2) Sometimes I canā€™t hear things properly- Iā€™ll hear words but not the right words forming at times - but this maybe happens a handful of times a year if that. Not an everyday thing at all but nonetheless still a problem.
3) Forgetting to open the wine bottle cap before pouring into the glass a few times on dates.
4) Not knowing that paracetamol could be classed as a painkiller. Always just referred to it as medicine.
5) Sometimes Iā€™ll read something then temporarily forget it. E.g. on someoneā€™s Instagram post a woman said she was having a boy. In the subsequent post showing the birth of her baby for some reason I thought it would be a girl just because the pictures looked like it would be one.
6) Only recently classing coffee as a hot drink. For whatever reason i classed hot drinks as hot lemonade or hot versions of any other forms of fruit juice.
7) Didnā€™t realise ā€œcuppaā€ meant coffee for some reason. Whilst I was familiar with the phrase cuppa coffee for some reason if someone just said ā€œcuppaā€ Iā€™d be a little puzzled.
8) As a child I was known for throwing a ball and doing pushups weirdly. - maybe this was an early sign of poor motor skills?
I think you guys get the idea, Iā€™m an idiot. I could list so much more examples but donā€™t want this turning into a long winded essay.
In addition to the above Iā€™ve always struggled with concentration, distractibility and of course poor memory which makes me think I have ADD or maybe some form of dyspraxia.
As mentioned above Iā€™m not seeking sympathy or attention I just want straightforward answers on how I can get better and whether the above examples could be linked to a form of learning disability. I just want to get better and potentially receive treatment via the NHS.
Thanks
submitted by Akza-3 to Neurodivergent [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:32 NoTelephone118 AITA for standing up for myself when a bully tried to shame me for being gay?

I, (16M) have been feeling strong gay tendencies since i was young, but ive recently accepted it and is now living happily as a student, well until a bully from my school basically harrased me.
It was a pretty normal day at school, nothing crazy going on, until math class, i was sitting minding my own business, handing papers when suddenly, the boy i had a deep hatred for, insulted me for being gay. I was there with my best friend at the time and when i heard him, i immediately clapped back. I called him a "fatherless c*nt" and continued to insult him later on. I furiously shouted at him- "well atleast i dont look like spongebob with all that acne!" My best friend eventually joined in and called him multiple names. It obviously broke him, he just stood there, embarrassed, because no one was standing up for him.
When i went home i reflected about what happened, I didn't tell my parents about it because I didn't wanna accidentally out myself (they had suspicions of me being gay so I didn't wanna risk it). I went to check my phone a few hours later and saw my best friends message with a screenshot from the bullys facebook account with posts threatening to attack me. All of it were insane, vulgar, and creepy warnings telling me not to show up to school. The posts were public and a lot of people found out about the incident, with one of the posts saying "So were talking about families now huh?" I did show up to school but i was feeling very confident that i managed to stand up for myself like that. AITA for going "too far" ?
I forgot to add a few things...
The chaos didn't really stop there, he kept calling me names, for instance, every time I walked hed say "Walk, you f*****!" but i just decided to ignore him because it'll make me feel better. But i wasnt able to shut him up and eventually i released all of the anger bottled up inside me. I verbally abused him face to face, i called him very hurtful names, (i knew that i went a little WAY too far this time and i actually felt bad) When he told me i was a failure to society i went on a rant and said: "You really arent gonna stop, are you? Ive been nothing but patient with your stupid attitude, and IVE HAD ENOUGH." I went on and exposed his deepest darkest secrets for everybody to hear. Up until now, i feel guilty for what i did.
submitted by NoTelephone118 to AITAH [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:32 Weekly-Rest1033 I don't know if I was wrong in all this..

I have almost 4 month old sons named Ronald Adam and Alistair Elijah. The meanings behind the names: Ronald was my husband's grandfather's name who he was very close with. Adam is from a video game character he likes. Alistair is a video game character I like and I just love the name. Elijah is an honor name for my nana. Well my big sister who is 9 years older than me and who I have always been extremely close to said she had a list of names she didn't want me naming our boys and Ronald was on that list. Even when I explained why that name was chosen, she made a face and put her nose up in the air.
My sister "gives nicknames for everyone". She was calling Ronald "Ari" and Alistair "Eli". I had mentioned probably we would call Alistair "Ali" as he got older. My sister said Ali was too girly.
She kept writing Ari and Eli and it just was driving me crazy. I finally asked her to please start calling them by their given names, I know she doesn't like them but for now we would like her to use their given names at least in our company. This was all said over text. I wasn't rude. She said "okay but I'm just going to say one thing" and I see a wall of text. I didn't read it. I didn't want to fight.
Is this wrong of me? I know they're just nicknames. Maybe it would have been okay if she wasn't so against their given names. But my sister was so against me having boys... "You know this is your husband's fault right? Maybe your twin sister will get pregnant now and give us girls" and even told some lady we just met "Yeah she's having twins, they're boys and we are upset about that" Did I want girls? Absolutely..but I wouldn't have told a random stranger that.
Since getting pregnant, my whole perception of my childhood changed. I thought my mom and my big sister were the best... That they truly loved me. But now my big sister will not talk to me because I asked her to use my son's names correctly. The sad thing is... I don't even miss her.
submitted by Weekly-Rest1033 to beyondthebump [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:31 tobedeleted-user I [M30]think I broke my wife [F26], and now she hates herself. What can I do to make my wife feel pretty again?

I apologize in advance, as english is not my first language. Pretty much everything here I've translated on google. Two weeks ago, my wife (F26) and I (M30) were at a party, her father's birthday party. It was going well, then her parents ntroduced us to an old couple of friends of theirs, from when they were around our age, and their daughter (F29) too, who I recognized as an old friend from high school. Let's call her Andrea (fictional name). For context, me and my wife are not the jealous type, as our relationship is based on trust, and has always been. So, when Andrea and I sat together on a table and started talking, my wife didn't mind it, and stayed with her family. I remember Andrea as being the fun kid when we were in highschool, and she was still just as funny. We're laughing and having a good time, and she started getting a bit "touchy", but nothing worth worrying about, I thought. I was wrong. She was definitely getting touchy, feeling my arms and asking if I started working out and this type of stuff. That's when I fucked up, because I didn't stop her. In fact, I held her hips at some point, and then my wife came in. She was obviously jealous and angry, but didn't make a scene. She started asking Andrea if she's married, or has a boyfriend, that type of territorial stuff, and at some point, Andrea got uncomfortable and excused herself. I told my wife she was being rude, and she started accusing me or flirting with Andrea. Of course I told her I wasn't, that she was overreacting and Andrea was just an old friend, but my wife insisted that I was flirting and cheating. Then I got mad. Cheating? I snapped at her and said she was being childish and insecure, overreacting. What then if I was enjoying the attention? It is definitely not the same as cheating, is it? She then said something that made me go silent, something along the lines of "cheating starts in thought, you don't need to have sex with someone else to cheat". I insisted I didn't cheat on her, and that I never would, but she just gave up on arguing and tried to enjoy the party with her family. When we got home, later that night, my wife was silent. I didn't say anything either, just assumed that we were over it, since she didn't bring it up. For the next couple weeks, she still didn't mention anything, and neither did I. We didn't talk much, and she was also never in the mood for any intimacy. I thought it was okay, and that everything would be back to normal in a week or two. It didn't, and now I know I made all the wrong decisions. Last night when I got home, my wife was in our bedroom, staring at herself in the mirror with a grimace. I asked if she was alright, and she just shake her head. I kept asking what was wrong, and she broke down in tears saying she looked hideous. For context, my wife is far from hideous. To me, she's the complete opposite, and so to everyone else. I'm not exaggerating when I say she can't even go out for groceries without people ciming to compliment her beauty and her nice hair. So, to hear she say that, it broke me. Of course I told her she's beautiful, but she kept on sobbing and saying she never felt so ugly before. I didn't know what to do or say, I just held her and kept telling her just how pretty she is, but she had that apathetic and gloomy expression on her face, and kept crying herself to sleep. I'm writing this as she sleeps besides me. My heart is completely broken, and I just wish I could go back in time and never hurt her in the first place. My wife mean everything to me, and I don't know how to fix things. Has anyone here ever been through something like this? How do I make my wife feel pretty and special again?
submitted by tobedeleted-user to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 14:30 wanderayeing 23 [M4F] Sulat mula sa demonyong mabait.

Hi, Iā€™m currently looking for so called constant, not a situationhip. I donā€™t believe on that. Letā€™s start as a friend, so weā€™ll get to know each other flaws, wants, needs and beliefs in our life. Lowkey I want it to be exclusive but I dont want to close each other door as there is a possibility that you may find me boring. What I mean by constant is someone will understand what I am or what you are , who will listen to each other story, asking each other how our day went and a study buddy. If we click or you think we share almost the same wavelength then weā€™ll proceed naman to so called serious relationship.
About me:
About you:
submitted by wanderayeing to PhR4Dating [link] [comments]


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