Main point and sub points

Yes, I’m being serious with this post. Yes, I’m going to post this in more than once place.
Please note, I am trying something different and posting outside of the general conspiracy/woo subs. Rather than deleting this post, why not leave it, if only for your own amusement at the sort of responses it will generate? 😉
Upfront, in case someone actually real reads this post and doesn’t like my “NPCmillionaire” handle: I agree it may seem bot-like (especially with the profile image) and I debated on using this account again, but at least this one is aged and has some karma. Like you, I understand how usernames on Reddit a lot of the time mirror the content of the poster. It’s just another useless synchronicity in this subtle hell of a reality where we are trapped.
I am not going to make this too long. There is no point. Either someone real reads this or they do not. I won’t reply publicly unless it is a super compelling post. You are welcome to send me DMs and messages, but you really need to say something different to grab my attention. I am very numb to most conspiracy/woo since it goes absolutely no where, or at least that has been my experience so far.
That being said, I don’t have a problem learning new material if there is an eventualy payoff. I would be happy to be corrected on my current belief system, which if you are interested in it, you are welcome to look at some of my older posts and see my mindset developing to where it is now. If the topics in my title are new to you, or you are just starting on this path, I wish you luck, but I’m not interested in discussing basics with anyone. I want to go to the next level.
I could say more, but why bother? Whoever is in control of reality knows exactly what it has been doing to me. Maybe reality has been doing the same to you? Endless, pointless synchronicities both online and in real life that go absolutely nowhere? I see them. So what’s next?
I have this part to maybe avoid the automods that I know I will run into: 056

I (24F) Been dating this guy for three months (29M). We met organically through school. We have really good sexual chemistry. Have similar music taste, morals etc. Most of the time we chat a lot and act like friends. But He picks fights with me a lot, gets jealous really easily, tries to show he cares tho.
It’s gotten to the point where I tell him I’m tired of him picking fights with me. Something along the lines accusing me of flirting with others, not giving him attention or communicating. ( I am very VERY affectionate).Always tells me I’m “rushing him”. He mostly compliments me when have sex. Whenever I get emotional he always rebuttals it with logic, comforts me then kind of holds it over me later. He shows me he cares in some ways. (Like paying for my meals, taking me to and from the airport, fixing things for me) But in a lot of other ways it feels like maybe I’m just hard to get rid of. I’ve wanted to leave him before lots of times, but I’m afraid, idk why. I think it’s cause his emotional avoidance is similar to how my parents treated me (probably got attached by always trying to earn persons love, currently in therapy trying to work on it!).
Problem is I think I’m in love with him. I’ve almost said it so many times when are having a good memory together. But all the fights he starts, tells me I’m emotionally draining, it pains me. He makes me so happy but hurts me. I want to break up with him which is already hard to do but part of me also wants to tell him I love him. How should I break up with him when it’s so hard for me to? And when I have to see him at school next semester? please help.

So me (30f) and my bf (30m) have been together for almost 3 years. We’ve been visiting each other 3-4 times per year and then spending a generous amount of time together. We’ve been on vacations together and are overall really happy. We chat and videochat daily. He’s very sweet and affectionate, he’s quite charming and good looking. English is not my first language but it is his, however even if I can speak English fairly well, he makes an effort to learn my language.
He plans to move to my country to be together, but in the past 1.5 years, little to no effort has been put into that thought by him. That discourages me a little. Also, he has been unemployed for years as he has been battling mental health problems. He does have a very small business going on but once he moves out of his country, that would be over. In our relationship, I would be the sole breadwinner, and even if I love him and am ready to do so, I am a bit afraid that I would grow resenting him at some point. The future scares me a bit, as I myself have been burned out at some point.
Now to my problem. A few weeks ago I met this guy, he’s from my town. He’s older, has an apartment, a really good job, works out, is very responsible and is interested in me. I went out with him twice, as friends. He’s funny, sweet, really smart, he’s also quite good looking but maybe less than my bf. We have a lot in common, and I enjoy his company. I find myself sometimes thinking that a relationship with him would actually be a better fit for me.
What should I do? I feel shitty to do this to my bf, but I also feel stressed because he doesn’t actively take steps to move here. Thinking about a future with him stresses me out because he cant provide for us.
Help?

In the heart of Chicago, where the skyline pierced the heavens and the streets pulsed with life, there lived a man named Victor Kane. At 26 years old and a startling 6'3" in stature, Victor commanded attention effortlessly. His piercing gaze seemed to see through the very fabric of one's soul, and his knowing, flirtatious smirk hinted at secrets that few could ever fathom. Victor was a man of many faces, each one carefully crafted and expertly worn to blend into any situation, like a chameleon adapting to its surroundings. Each interaction with another human was as if it were another painting to be hung in the Art Institute of Chicago, a masterpiece of social maneuvering and charm.
To most, he appeared unremarkable, perhaps even a bit dim, an illusion he maintained with meticulous precision. Yet beneath this facade lay a mind as sharp as a dagger, honed by years of strategic thinking, manipulation, and the art of emotional deceit. Victor had learned from the best. His father, a man deeply entrenched in the shadowy world of organized crime, had mastered the art of bending reality to his will. A master chess player, he treated people like pieces on a grand chessboard, moving them at his whim, always six steps ahead. Victor had absorbed these lessons like a sponge, his young mind eagerly soaking up every tactic, every subtle nuance of control.
Battles with his father have left their scars, trailing off Victor like a snake's entrails as they slither through crowded streets, scanning for their next meal. They probe the aura of each passerby, tasting their energy, yet to their disappointment, they find no juicy, dirt-filled sponge of pain and suffering. They taste desires, yet nothing hits just right. Empty husks, devoid of the essence they crave. Living memories enshroud him in a cloud of black smoke, a spectral fog visible only to a witch. A demon, masquerading as a homeless man and muttering incoherent whispers, feels the snake's embrace tighten around him. He halts abruptly, turning to Victor with a knowing gaze. 'I see you,' he murmurs, 'Such discipline and composure may deceive the others, yet it's only a matter of time before they find you.' The homeless man continues his walk, pulling a black suitcase along, his tattered white shirt contrasting sharply with his black suit, and no tie to complete the ensemble.
Victor makes no comment, his mind a labyrinth of dark intentions and calculated moves. He viewed the world as a malleable entity, something he could shape and twist to suit his needs. The streets, the people, the very air he breathed; they were all part of a grand, intricate game where he alone held the key. He had no qualms about using others to achieve his goals, seeing them as mere tools in his grand design. It was a dangerous philosophy, one which required constant vigilance and adaptability. As he moved through the throngs of oblivious souls, he could almost hear the whispers of their deepest fears and hidden sins. The scars trailed behind him, living entities of their own, reaching out hungrily, desperate for a morsel of genuine suffering. Yet the city, with all its noise and chaos, offered little more than hollow echoes and fleeting shadows. Traces of happiness. Lost children in the never ending void of their own desperation. Victor's eyes flickered with a cold, calculating light. He was a master of this urban jungle, a predator in search of worthy prey. The demon’s warning lingered in his mind, yet it only fueled a burning hunger. He thrived in the shadows, where power and control were his for the taking. Each step he took was a step closer to his ultimate end goal, a twisted vision of dominance, only he could see.
In the distance, the city’s lights shimmered like false promises, yet Victor knew better. Beneath the surface, in hidden corners and forgotten alleys, darkness mirrored his own. In this abyss, he felt certain he would find what he sought: the true essence of his own hunger, the raw, unfiltered energy he could devour. Victor thrived on the underestimation of others, reveling when people perceived him as lesser. Such perceptions made his manipulations appear as innocent mistakes, acts of ignorance and oblivion. His favorite targets: those with inflated egos, individuals convinced of their invincibility.
"A person with a big ego is like an orgasm," he often mused, speaking as if to his shadow. "It's just so easy. Their first mistake: telling me we're not equals. Afterward, they reveal all the buttons and levers in their psyche. They hand me their own weapon on a silver platter, asking, 'Victor, please send me to meet Anpu. Please show me the gates of my own demise.' Their insanity begs to be freed from this curse of societal norms. Always the first mistake, then the rest follow." Laughter echoed from the snakes twining around Victor. As he whispered these musings, the words ensnared a group of Venezuelans nearby, inciting them into a frenzy of violence without understanding the spark. Victor watched, casually tossing a silver dollar their way as if to say, "Welcome to the sanctuary," his smirk a shadow under the flickering streetlights. He calls to the boys, 'there now before you boys get into trouble remember this, you're only seeing the lions teeth, yet you haven't seen what triggered it.' They stared at Victor, startled, as he bid them farewell with a two-finger salute from his left temple and continued wandering down the street.
A drone sliced through the air, its camera lens capturing the serpentine twists of the Chicago River below. Victor, watching its flight, was transported to his youth, to days spent cobbling together a demonic owl from discarded household trinkets and an owl decoy. He would pilot this macabre creation through his neighborhood, a spectral puppeteer orchestrating nocturnal ballets which both delighted and unnerved his unsuspecting audience. A sinister grin unfurled across his lips, a shadow's whisper, as memories of those simple machines mingled with the sophisticated arsenal he commanded today. In the digital age, Victor had become a maestro of manipulation, his tools refined yet no less mischievous. Social media platforms were his stage, targeted advertisements and spoofed numbers his actors, each one playing their part in his grand, deceptive symphony. With the deftest touch, he planted seeds of doubt, spun webs of misinformation, transforming allies into adversaries, stitching chaos into the fabric of daily lives with mere whispers masquerading as shouts. His schemes were crafted with such subtlety, woven so seamlessly into the warp and weft of reality, that his victims believed themselves architects of their own undoing.
The crowning jewel of his current machinations was a prototype drone, a whimsical homage to the contraptions of his youth yet imbued with the precision of modern technology. This drone, engineered to navigate from the chilly confines of his refrigerator to the steamy oasis of his rooftop hot tub, was a testament to his technical acumen. Crafted to be mended with mere baubles from any corner hardware store, it stood as a symbol of practical genius, a playful yet potent emblem of his enduring craft.
Victor glimpsed a universe of possibilities within this project, each drone a seed from which new opportunities might bloom. "Perhaps I could craft a model for a dive shop in Australia," he mused. "A sentinel to monitor the slow dance of decay among the coral reefs." Such a gift could forge pathways, perhaps even secure an internship, an opportunity to wield his 417 subclass visa before its flame flickered out. The prospect of traversing Australia's vast landscapes, of weaving his influence through uncharted territories and minds, sparked a thrill within him. Beyond the realm of circuitry and code, Victor possessed a profound mastery over the human psyche. He had the uncanny ability to read individuals, to delve into the murky depths of their insecurities and desires. With the finesse of a sculptor, he could mold a woman’s perception, convincing her of a soul-deep connection, crafting mirages of perfect compatibility. Yet, for all his prowess in the art of deception, Victor adhered to his own strict code. He eschewed physical violence, never staining his hands with assault; his dominion was the mind, his influence woven through the delicate fabric of psychology.
In Chicago's suffocating underbelly, Victor's father regarded him not with paternal concern, rather with venomous animosity. Their relationship was a battleground, devoid of affection or empathy, cloaked threats masquerading as concern. "Victor, if you don't see a psychiatrist, I'm cutting you off," he declared, his voice a cold hiss, a deeper wish for Victor's demise lurking beneath. Victor's laugh, hollow, echoing through the night, a sound devoid of warmth, knew well the true nature of the psychiatrist and the deeper machinations of his father's cruel intentions. His father viewed him not as a son, yet as a nemesis, a presence he wished to erase from existence. Surrounded by the oppressive cityscape, Victor stood alone atop his building, the L line screeching past, the lights below mere distant, watchful eyes. "Tomorrow, I bend reality once more," he whispered into the void, his voice merging with the cold wind sweeping the rooftops.
The relentless pursuit of his father's malice shadowed him into the darkest city corners where shadows moved with intent, whispering of ancient, sinister forces. Here, in the corner of his eyes an oozing of black liquid drenched an alley, a tar monster, a grotesque manifestation of the city’s darkest secrets, its gnarled face and gleaming teeth mirroring the twisted relationship endured. Against a backdrop of a city thrumming with malevolent energy, Victor pondered the fragile line between delusion and reality. "It's only delusional till it works, so is it really delusional?" he mused aloud, his words dissipating into the night where the distinction between madness and genius blurred by darkness.
Retreating from the alley, his figure melded into the shadows, each step deliberate, burdened with the weight of a cursed legacy. He was acutely aware of his dual role, both manipulator and pawn in a grander, more malevolent game, a game orchestrated by forces predating the city itself. Every movement influenced by the sinister energy pervading Chicago, a legacy of corruption and darkness intertwined with his own existence. Victor understood his every action overseen by the ancient entity had taken interest in him, an entity finding delight in his struggle, offering protection at a dreadful cost.
Emerging from the shadows back into the flickering city lights, Victor found no solace in the illumination yet his smile stretched reaching his eyes showing his gleaming razor sharp teeth. These lights did not offer hope only humor; they were beacons of a foreboding reality. He resolved to continue bending reality, wielding the cursed power both protecting, ensnaring him, and pointing out the irony of his situation. Day after day, he would play this dark game, a master of deceit entwined with an ancient force more profound and sinister than any could fathom.
With one final, lingering look at the alley where darkness reigned supreme, Victor Kane laughed, a hollow echo fading as he stepped into the nearby pub. Inside, the warm glow contrasted starkly with the night's chilling embrace, yet the shadows seemed merely to lurk at the edges, waiting. At their usual spot by the worn bar, he found Billy Smith, his old high school Basketball teammate, with two pints of beer ready. They clinked glasses, the sound slicing through the hum of conversations around them. "To the unexpected," Victor intoned, his voice laced with a hint of irony. As they settled into the rhythm of their catch-up, the conversation inevitably turned toward the unfolding news, the war in Ukraine, an event that had caught the world off guard.
"No one ever saw it coming," Billy remarked, his tone a mix of wonder and concern.
Victor's eyes flickered with a dark amusement, and raising his glass again, he offered a toast, this time in Latin, a language that carried the weight of history and secrets. "Ad profundis malorum," he declared, which translated to 'To the depths of evils.'
Billy paused, the words hanging between them like a veil being slowly drawn back to reveal a hidden scene. The toast was enigmatic, resonant with Victor’s acknowledgment of the chaos brewing both near and far, a chaos that, perhaps, only he could navigate.
As the night deepened within the grimy confines of the pub, where every corner whispered of misdeeds and the air hung heavy with the scent of stale beer and lost hopes, the laughter and chatter provided a deceptive cover for the profound game silently playing in Victor’s mind. His cryptic toast, "Ad profundis malorum," echoed a darker undertone amidst the jovial noise.
Across the bar, a woman with long jet black hair and piercing grey eyes watched Victor. Clad in a striking red full-grain leather trench coat, her presence was undeniably conspicuous, yet paradoxically, she remained unnoticed. Despite her short stature, she was fit, her features sharply defined, an attractiveness seemingly almost otherworldly amidst the grime of the pub. Curiously, not even the barkeep spared her a glance, as if she existed in a separate realm, visible only to those she chose to confront. As Billy excitedly shared his plans to open a dive shop with a taco bar on the roof, the woman’s lips moved in a whisper, her voice a soft, clear bell in the din, carrying a dire warning. "I know what you are. We found you." At that moment, a flashback surged through Victor’s mind, a haunting image of a colonial girl he once saw in the Fraser Experimental Forest. His girlfriend at the time had turned to him, her voice tinged with unease. "Victor, do you see what I see? The girl? Yeah, the girl. I can feel something following us. As if it knows what we are yet won't approach, yet I can feel it." This vivid recollection now seemed a prelude to the current moment, a chilling reminder the forces he had glimpsed back then were the same now declaring their presence.
The evening wound down with plans made and stories shared, yet the woman’s prophetic words and the ghostly memory of the girl hung unseen in the air, portending looming confrontations between the light she embodied and the shadow following Victor Kane. As the patrons began to drift away, the shadows reclaiming their territory within the pub, the mysterious woman’s figure faded into the background, her message delivered, her purpose yet unclear but undoubtedly intertwined with Victor’s fate.
The end.

So I must fist say that I am in my early thirties and ave gone through accutane when I was eighteen and that god rid of a lot of my acne. And that I have been using tret since December 2022 . And my skin is mostly clear except around my period I would get like three pimples or the odd one . But all in all I don’t have j’huge issues. I started tret 0,05 too in December 2022 to mprove texture and pores. I started spiro April 2023 because I was having unusual breakouts that I think were linked with a contraceptive pill that I stopped anyways. And I loved it so much because I had no side effects and no breakouts at all. And even if they were not a lot I would get very upset when I would get one or two like social anxiety. It’s been a few months like two months it seems to not be working as well as it used to. I started having my period again which I didn’t in the beginning for four months but the breakouts came back . Not bad but I have a little around my period. I must also mention that I started at 150 because my dermatologist told me to. So I can’t really up my dosage. Should I stop ? Like maybe my body got used to it . And there is no point now. Or is it still working but I am getting greedy ? I don’t know now because the tret also improves my skin. But during the summer I had nothing no acne at all ever and no period which was annoying..

As someone who’s been watching anime since Z and Naruto as a kid I’ve never given one piece a chance. I’ve seen glimpse of it when it was on toonami but never got hooked on it.
Today I decided to change that and I went from episode 1 to 30 staying up way past midnight and… oh man it’s so good. I think im starting Arlong Park at episode 31 but one thing I love character wise is the natural camaraderie the straw hats have. When Usopp joined it truly seemed like they’ve been for years without it feeling awkward. Luffy is hilarious and awesome and I totally see why he’s tons of people’s anime Goat. My favorite moment is the deadpan “we’re pirates” when the town folks were pissed off about what happened to the mayor. Nami is having an inner monologue about how to get out of the situation and he just says that with no fear or hesitation.I was dying laughing along with Zoro🤣
I love at times the art style kinda turns into some of those old storybook styles with white around the edges.
The only thing I’m not a fan of is how some episodes at the start have like a 2-5 minute recap of the previous episode. I just chalk it up as a product of the era it was made in cause I can remember DBZ and Naruto doing the same thing. It’s just annoying when I’m so excited to see what happens next.
One strange thing is the whole mihawk situation though. It seems like Don Krieg and his men are about to fight the restaurant crew and he just shows up( badass entrance btw) having chased them from the grand line to the East blue. After the entire zoro situation and Mihawk’s about to leave, Krieg takes a shot at him and Mihawk just… leaves. What was the point in chasing them that far just to leave them alone? Also why would Don even think about trying anything after witnessing what he did to Zoro and them at the grand line? I’ll chalk the second question to Don Krieg’s bullheaded bravado though.
Can’t wait to watch the rest of the series! I know I got a long way to go and I’m actually about it?

So I must fist say that I am in my early thirties and ave gone through accutane when I was eighteen and that god rid of a lot of my acne. And that I have been using tret since December 2022 . And my skin is mostly clear except around my period I would get like three pimples or the odd one . But all in all I don’t have j’huge issues. I started tret 0,05 too in December 2022 to mprove texture and pores. I started spiro April 2023 because I was having unusual breakouts that I think were linked with a contraceptive pill that I stopped anyways. And I loved it so much because I had no side effects and no breakouts at all. And even if they were not a lot I would get very upset when I would get one or two like social anxiety. It’s been a few months like two months it seems to not be working as well as it used to. I started having my period again which I didn’t in the beginning for four months but the breakouts came back . Not bad but I have a little around my period. I must also mention that I started at 150 because my dermatologist told me to. So I can’t really up my dosage. Should I stop ? Like maybe my body got used to it . And there is no point now. Or is it still working but I am getting greedy ? I don’t know now because the tret also improves my skin. But during the summer I had nothing no acne at all ever and no period which was annoying..

We sit down and try to talk it out I’m livid now. I’m on the verge of just shutting it all down and going emotionless again. She says sorry.. about my mother and everything then starts blaming me! Holy fucking shit I’m providing almost all the finances I’m doing equal shares of laundry dishes and folding except for the last GODDAMN WEEK I’ve been putting atleast one kid to bed getting the puppy calmed down and still having the audacity to workout maintain the lawn and work 9-13 hour days. I called her out and it was cold. I’m not proud but it was needed.
She tried to defend her actions at this point I’m done and just walk out. I need a moment. She gets upset and everyone decides they need to go north to a college down to shop. I’m alone wiring electrical and putting together the toddlers bed and retapping parts of the wall… I haven’t felt this much self loathing in years. I was just sitting there working which was the only thing keeping me away from razors again. I wanted to cry but I can’t anymore. No release could be found that wasn’t self destructive.
They all come back like nothing ever happened. At this point I’ve over excreted what little energy I had. My skin was cold and clammy but my body was sweating profusely. My face was pale and I was struggling to breathe. Now she says I should be resting and she has no idea why I’m pushing so hard?! Am I being fucking gaslit?! This was all your idea this was your demand?!
Flash forward an hour my puppy was outside for about 30 minutes and it’s hot so I try to get her in. She refuses which isn’t uncommon but she’s hiding under the deck.
I get her out and in and make sure she’s drinking water we get down stairs and I’m about to feed her and she fucking pees on the carpet. It’s tinged with blood. Oh fuck no not now, well let the wife know and she knows it’s just like when she first arrived from Iraq. Got a UTI again, so I have to now rearrange all the shit from the projects in the garage get the car seats out and her crate in the truck pushing way past what my body wanted or needed. Yeeted an energy drink. Which was also a mistake.
Then wife goes “you look like your about to pass out I’ll do it for you, I’ll drive her the hour to the vets” cause no where is open on a Saturday except an hour away. No fuck that I just pushed myself as fucking hard for you and got the puppy I’m in it now. Fuck whatever happens.
Drive down to big city, talked to mom entire trip and forced her to tell me what wife said about me. Same shit like always, her and MIL shit on me for everything. barely make it cause I’m dying inside looks like a ghost staring at me in the mirror. Fuck who cares honesty. 5 hours there 1000$ later got meds for her and head home…

I know that superficially this may look like something for books but for implicit reasons this is most likely the right place.
I’m currently reading The Art of Computer Programming by Donald Knuth, and I’m not having a good time.
Basically I get stuck at every fourth page.
So, the problem question should be, more specifically, how do you read properly?
I could just go over the 600 pages without really knowing what’s happening, but no point.
How do you read this book? What is the procedure you follow on every page?

This weekend has been incredibly taxing. My Q has been trying to get sober for the last few days after about a 6 week binge (he was sober for a week of that about 2 weeks ago but back slid). He gets to points where he's just the absolute opposite of himself. Where he's demeaning and belittling and cold. It's like a flip too, I never know when it's going to happen but it's typically when he's drank waaay too much and typically on benzos. I do my best to be a little grey rock and not let it phase me but sometimes it can be so difficult to read his mood and what's going on in his mind.

My (25F) girlfriend and I (24NB) were planning on having just one birthday party for the both of us next month, since our birthdays are only days apart and I'm going to be visiting her (we are long distance) for the week. We thought it was a good idea to have it together. The ppl invited are just her group of friends (for obvious reasons) whom I get along pretty well and already knew beforehand. The issue came around later when she asked me if she could invite another friend to the party that's not really in the group chat, and I told her that since this is a celebration for the both of us, I wouldn't be comfortable with that.
Now, the thing is, I don't like this particular friend at all because of some stuff he did and said in the past (about my gf). They fought and fell apart for a couple of months last year and then at the beginning of this one, after blocking her and removing her from his social media and bad-mouthing her, he asked her to reconnect and talk about it. Apparently a mutual friend convinced him. My gf accepted this and went to have dinner with him and they did talk about it, he apologized for being an asshole but told her that he was just waiting for her to reach out (cause she used to do that when they fought before and now she didn’t). At the end, she told him that they couldn't go back to what they were, but they could see how things go. She asked for my opinion on this and I told her that based on the things he said at the meeting and all that, I wouldn't really trust him, but at the end of the day it was her choice and I'd respect whatever she decided on, whether they are friends again or just acquaintances. That doesn't mean I don't have my own thoughts about it though. He was an immature asshole and he hurt her and made her cry. She was dealing with a lot of intrusive thoughts and had depressive episodes after all went down. I understand she wants to forgive him, and I actually like how she can put all behind them and move on, but I'm not really like that.
Anyways, that was it. She told me she wouldn't want to hang out with him like just the two of them like before, but that she wouldn't avoid him if he happen to be in the same place or hanging out with the same friends.
As far as I know, they haven't been talking at all. But now she told me she wants to invite him to the birthday party and wanted to know how I felt about it. And I was honest. I don't like him and I would rather not see him, if it can be avoided. I wouldn't have said anything if it was just her party, of course, because she has the right to invite whoever she wants, but since it was a celebration for the both of us and since she asked, I guess I thought it would've been nice to have a say and all that. This didn't really sit right with her.
We had a huge fight about it and she told me she wanted to invite him anyways, and if I didn't want him there bc it was my birthday as well, we should do two separate parties so she can invite him to hers. Under normal circumstances, that would've been fine by me. But as I established before, we are long distance. None of my friends or family are going to celebrate with me there, so I think the idea is rather dumb; the only person who's not going to be invited to mine is him, the rest of the guests would be the same and really, would they even want to go to two different reunions with a two day difference just because of this one person? At the end, I told her it was fine and I would just bear with it. I'm not an immature person who's going to fill the room with negative energy just because of this, and the things he did are not really unforgivable crimes to the point I wouldn't want to be in the same room as him. He's just an asshole and a bad friend. I didn't really like the fact that she asked me like I had a choice at all, because at the end it was either we invite him or you make your own party outside of mine, but anyways.
So, that's solved. I can compromise on that and I also understand her point, I guess, since at the end of the day he is (was?) one of her closest friends. I don't know.
The thing that has been bothering me now is that after all of this went down, we talked about it more deeply and she told me that it doesn't make sense that I would hold a grudge towards the people that are in her life, cause the problems she has have all to do with her and whoever that person is and not, well, me.
And I don't really know how to feel about that? I had issues with some friends in the past and ex partners that were toxic, and the ppl around me despise them. I have a complicated relationship with my mom as well, and most of them hold resentment towards her for that reason and I'm aware of this. These problems are none of their business, I know, but I thought it was normal to watch them react to it and form their own opinions toward those people because they hurt me. And I'm dear to them. And it's the same the other way around. If you hurt my friends, I don't like you, whether you are a family member or an ex boyfriend or a toxic friend.
I asked her what does she think about the ppl that hurt me, and she told me she doesn't have any kind of resentment towards them because is not her place. She might not like them bc of their actions, but that's about it. If I decide to forgive them, she welcomes them back into her life as well.
So now I'm wondering, is it wrong of me to hold grudges against someone who hurts the people who are dear to me? Am I the asshole? Should I stop?
I have spoken about this to my friends but I think I need a little more perspective, cause they all behave the same way I do when we are talking about this particular topic.

So this feels like one that on paper is really obvious but in reality is so much harder to handle.
I(F32) have a very good friend F(31) who I’ve known since school. We have been friends for almost 20 years. She was my bridesmaid and I am almost certain I will (or would have been) hers instead.
Lately my friend has gone through so much. She moved home from living abroad and I know she’s feeling really lost. She is living with her parents, she’s single (not for any reason - was in a long term relationship and it didn’t work out), she had no job for a while but is now working in a school she said she would never work in and on top of that a very young member of her family is battling an extremely aggressive form of cancer.
All of this is horrific for one person to go through, I hate seeing her struggling and I am doing my best to be there for her without overhwhelming her. I send her messages every week or so to update her on my life (just to give her something to listen to that’s not about her own worries) and I ask about her and her family. Most of the time she ignores these and that’s absolutely fine. I know her long enough to know how overwhelmed she gets and how much she struggles with anxiety, even before all this happened.
The thing is though, I also travel to her to see her and she says she can’t wait to see me but then just doesn’t respond on the day. I’ll get an apology a few days later and she will tell me how busy she was and how she forgot.
It was becoming so frequent I was getting a bit frustrated. She’s always saying she’s so busy, which I understand, but it’s beginning to feel now a bit rude. I’m busy too. I have a son, a new house, a new puppy who requires a lot of time and attention, a part time job, I’m studying for my professional accounting exams, I’m part of a running club and training for a half marathon.
I 100% understand what she’s going through, but at what point am I just being a bit pathetic constantly showing up and getting stood up. When she does meet me or message back she always says how much she loves me, our friendship etc. she’s always so apologetic. I honestly can forgive her anything but today I feel hurt..
We had plans to go for a walk. I will have class all day but I made a point to get up extra early so we could meet up and I sent her a message to confirm it’s still going ahead. Not only did she not reply but she of course didn’t show up.
I haven’t heard from her at all. She’s completely within her right to not want to prioritise our friendship. She doesn’t have to meet me or hang out, but is it not so rude to be a full adult and have that little respect for your so called best friends time?
For my own mental health I feel I need to step back from this. Stop reaching out, stop trying, but on the other hand I really love her, she’s a beautiful girl inside and out and she’s going through a lot.

Yes, I’m being serious with this post. Yes, I’m going to post this in more than once place.
Please note, I am trying something different and posting outside of the general conspiracy/woo subs. Rather than deleting this post, why not leave it, if only for your own amusement at the sort of responses it will generate? 😉
Upfront, in case someone actually real reads this post and doesn’t like my “NPCmillionaire” handle: I agree it may seem bot-like (especially with the profile image) and I debated on using this account again, but at least this one is aged and has some karma. Like you, I understand how usernames on Reddit a lot of the time mirror the content of the poster. It’s just another useless synchronicity in this subtle hell of a reality where we are trapped.
I am not going to make this too long. There is no point. Either someone real reads this or they do not. I won’t reply publicly unless it is a super compelling post. You are welcome to send me DMs and messages, but you really need to say something different to grab my attention. I am very numb to most conspiracy/woo since it goes absolutely no where, or at least that has been my experience so far.
That being said, I don’t have a problem learning new material if there is an eventualy payoff. I would be happy to be corrected on my current belief system, which if you are interested in it, you are welcome to look at some of my older posts and see my mindset developing to where it is now. If the topics in my title are new to you, or you are just starting on this path, I wish you luck, but I’m not interested in discussing basics with anyone. I want to go to the next level.
I could say more, but why bother? Whoever is in control of reality knows exactly what it has been doing to me. Maybe reality has been doing the same to you? Endless, pointless synchronicities both online and in real life that go absolutely nowhere? I see them. So what’s next?
I have this part to maybe avoid the automods that I know I will run into: 053

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Please don’t judge , but I hate everything and everyone. I haven’t been able to date since my early 20s and now the clock is ticking and it’s difficult. My mom treats me like I have no feelings since I haven’t even finished my degree and she can’t stop taking about how I’ve lost my youth/haven’t traveled/party comparing me to what she used to be like in my age. I have a friend younger than me by 2 years. When she was 18 and I were 20 she was way too shy and till her 20s while I was 22 to 23 I was way more chill about the fact that I was still a virgin because she was too . It made me feel better. She lost hers at 21 and now she’s in a 9 month relationship after dating 4 guys. She finished her degree and now she’s studies in law firm . I just can’t comprehend why everything is so easy for her and not for me.
She’s inherently “boring” like not really into the fandom culture. I can’t understand how her boyfriend can date her since he’s a whole nerd , and when ever we go out all together we talk about different kind of things and she’s keeps quiet like she barely watches marvel/ movies or series’s. The only thing she has watched it’s the Aang the last airbender.
My mother always tell me to do what “she does” to adopt her mannerism in order to date someone. But at this I point I fear to express to someone that I’m a virgin at this age.

I just pulled Helbrecht. From what I’ve seen here in the sub, his main use seems to be anti-psyker in Guild raids. But the posts I’ve found were older at times. So: what’s the current view on Helbrecht? Is his active good with melee teams? I like to play melee focussed and I wonder whether I should invest in him.
Thank you very much for your opinions.

I just started reading the Bible from a critical point of view, and my research made me realize a few things that now make me believe that the female is actually superior to the male:

• Every embryo would develop into a female if there weren’t a genetic program to prevent it, which means that Eve has to be the first human on earth, not Adam.
  
• Everyone needs an X chromosome, which comes from the female, to survive, but not the Y chromosome.
  
• The female reproductive system is way more complex than the male one. You only need one single man to get a bunch of kids, but it doesn’t work the other way around.
  

I will never let anyone convince me again that men have more value than women. Obviously, everyone has value, but if the world wants to oppress people because of their sex, there should be a matriarchy, not a patriarchy.

I don't know if this has to do anything with philosophy and maybe it's not the place for me in this community. I watched healthygamer or Dr K and I love to watch his videos. He seems to have pretty much a good understanding not only about psychology but many things. Well i'll explain my problem here:
I feel so contradicted lately, confused. I've been afraid to approach women my whole life I got into self improvement space and over time I managed to approach them and get over my fear. I realized self improvement space is all a paradox and I started looking for answers in the outside world in life. I also when I approached women my desires changed, I went from desiring to have a women in my life to now having tens of women I can talk to and now dating seems absurd to me. I'm more in my existential thoughts faze, going through healing faze of trauma I now feel pretty confident and I started being able to dig deeper into myself and now I'm questioning existential thoughts and it's sort of something that's close to an identity crisis but it isn't. When I managed to get dates now I feel it has no purpose or point, either I loved the woman or I didn't, I feel no lust in me or neither no attraction, even If I felt attraction i'm not having the drive to go out on a date. For example, I set up a date today with this woman that's healthy, beautiful so it's something to be excited about but i'm not. I feel demotivated or uninterested when I managed to set up the date and I feel like I want to know more of myself. When I got what I wanted, I don't want it anymore. Became somewhat ignorant to these pleasures of life.
Another example, I used to be so anxious and worried about what I wear in school 6 months ago, now i don't care about what I wear as long as I don't smell bad I could wear the same thing for decades.
something feels absurd to me about all of that, one thing that I noticed in myself, I still now enjoy hard work, even more if i'm being honest, I crave hardwork with every part of me because it may be has an intense sensation within me atleast? A thought gets into my head emotions aren't significant and as strong as people talk about especially the happy emotions, I don't know why, when I experience sadness it feels a bit intense but if it's about happiness it just feels like a normal feeling it's not about all the hype that it is talked about
Wait, wait, maybe I realized something, it's getting into my subconscious from all these videos that negative feelings are something so scary and that's why it feels even more intense than it is? if that makes sense? Or am i tripping?

I got an Aorus Master 4080 which apparently have new software (bios/firmware) available. I have tried running the updates from GCC and also by downloading them from the website. The executable is running but then nothing happens.
The two updates available are:
GV-N4080AORUS M-16GD FIRMWARE F1.2
GV-N4080AORUS M-16GD LCDFIRMWARE F1.5
Both updates act similar.
Have anyone experience with these and able to point me in the right direction?