Lavalife by phone
Mobile Phone Photography
2011.06.10 10:00 iranintoavan Mobile Phone Photography
This is a place to discuss the various techniques and information about mobile phone photography. It's also the place to share photos you have taken with your mobile phone.
2017.12.14 18:41 duckyoumate Indian Girls on Tinder
No matter a guy or a girl, share some cringeworthy profiles or chats from your Tinder encounters, have fun! :) Also remember that this is NOT an incel jerk sub, so if you're looking to whine about women and how they won't date you. You won't find that here, nor will it be tolerated. Be kind, be civil. 500 post karma and 1000 overall karma required. Don't message the mods asking why your posts aren't showing up, if you don't meet the karma requirements.
2017.06.13 13:03 tctovsli South Park: Phone Destroyer
Unofficial subreddit for the mobile game South Park: Phone Destroyer
2023.11.08 11:27 Few-Seaweed2635 Brief history on how online dating came to existence
 | submitted by Few-Seaweed2635 to OnlineDatingApps [link] [comments] |
2023.11.08 06:14 Few-Seaweed2635 Brief history on how online dating came to existence
 | Online dating came into existence in the late 20th century with the advent of the internet. Here's a brief timeline: submitted by Few-Seaweed2635 to OnlineDatingApps [link] [comments]
|
2019.11.08 07:55 Ozone21337 7 Tips to Help You Use Professional Dating Services
For people on a budget, there are free site de rencontre gratuit pour les hommes sites like plentyoffish and okCupid. For those interested in paying a bit more, there are paid sites like Lavalife and Match.com. And for those who are short on time and willing to pay for the privilege of saving some of that time, there are professional dating services. Designed to be one-stop-shops for people looking for a relationship, professional dating services take care of every aspect of setting up date. They find out what you're looking for in a mate, search for that kind of person, coordinate your schedules, set up the date... and generally coordinate everything so that all you have to do is show up. It's not for everyone, and it's expensive, but it's also very convenient. Over the next few days I'll go over some advice to help you get the most for your money if you choose to seek out a professional dating service.
Tip #1: Take your time and choose wisely.
Dating services stand out as an option for meeting people for many reasons. One of them is the simple fact that they can be pricey. For that reason, take your time and look at all the agencies out there before choosing one and shelling out your hard-earned cash. A reputable agency should take the time to work with you on a one-to-one basis, so you should think about how you'd like to work and choose a provider accordingly. For example, do you prefer lunch dates during the week, or weekend dinner dates? Also, you should think about the kind of person you're looking for. Agencies have a certain clientele, so make sure that your needs match what they can offer. Spending a lot of time considering these factors upfront will save you a lot of headaches - and money - in the long run.
Tip #2: Set yourself a budget before starting.
Once you've chosen some dating services that you think are a good fit, starting comparing prices. While you shouldn't shy away from a interesting option just because it's a bit more expensive than the others, you definitely want to have a budget in mind. This budget should be a kind of "experimentation" budget. In other words, ask yourself how much you're willing to "lose" in order to experiment with a dating service. While you should never assume the worst, you have to assume that you're going to have to spend some money before you find your soulmate. By setting yourself a budget, you'll become more comfortable with spending a bit of cash on a dating service, and you'll also set yourself a point at which you'll stop if it just isn't working for you.
Tip #3: Write down a description of what you're looking for in a soulmate.
The first step of a starting with a dating service is an interview where you'll be asked questions about yourself, and what you're looking for. You want to make the most of the interview, because that's how the dating service will search for singles for you. So it's a good idea to write down what you're looking for before you begin. By taking the time to really think about what your ideal date would be like, and then writing it down, you're going to paint a clearer picture of what you actually want in a soulmate. The better this picture is - and the closer it is to what you NEED in partner, and not what you WANT in one - the better your dates will be.
Tip #4: Get some quality face-time with a prospective service provider.
One of the great things about dating services is that you get something which is getting very rare these days: quality face-to-face time with someone (or at least, phone-to-phone time). This face-to-face time usually takes the form of an "interview," where the dating service gets to know what you're looking for. Make sure to squeeze all you can from this interview. Personalized service is great, so don't let yourself be rushed at any point. Answer all the questions they have for you truthfully, but also, ask them anything you want. Take your time. Get their advice. You never know what you may learn, and the more they know about you, the better your matches will be.
Tip #5: You're the boss, so make sure they do the work for you.
A dating service is just that: a service. You're paying someone to look for potential matches for you - so make sure they look hard. Don't be afraid to ask questions, to be critical of matches they've made, to give them constructive feedback, and to do anything else that you feel will help them find great dates for you... and that will make your life a little easier. Remember, a dating service can be a great time saver if you put the onus on them to work hard for you. And they're not just there to listen: so don't forget to ask questions. Pick their brains and squeeze them for everything they've got... it's one of the nice perks of hiring a dating service.
Tip #6: Be upfront about the fact that you're using a dating service.
Don't be shy about the fact that you're using a dating service, either with the people you meet on that service, or with your friends or family. Instead, be proud of the fact that you're taking matters into your own hands, and taking a very proactive approach to meeting people. By taking this position, you'll come across as being confident, instead of being insecure. This will help you on the dates you get through your service: by being upfront and confident about the fact that you're using a dating service, you'll put your date (who may be insecure about it) at ease, and instantly break the ice. Have fun with it. Laugh about it. It'll make your date that much more pleasant.
Tip #7: Make sure your behavior on a date is in line with your dating service.
Make sure your behavior on a date is in line with your dating service. What does that mean? Quite simply this: if you decide to go with a dating service designed for young business professionals, don't show to up to a date you got with your service dressed in ripped jeans and an old t-shirt. Remember that by definition, a dating service is matching you up with other members of that service, which means that you're joining a group of like-minded individuals. This is one of the big advantages of going with a service, because you have a pretty good idea of what kind of people you're going to be matched with. So make sure that you fit in to that group.
submitted by Ozone21337 to PresentType [link] [comments]
Tip #1: Take your time and choose wisely.
Dating services stand out as an option for meeting people for many reasons. One of them is the simple fact that they can be pricey. For that reason, take your time and look at all the agencies out there before choosing one and shelling out your hard-earned cash. A reputable agency should take the time to work with you on a one-to-one basis, so you should think about how you'd like to work and choose a provider accordingly. For example, do you prefer lunch dates during the week, or weekend dinner dates? Also, you should think about the kind of person you're looking for. Agencies have a certain clientele, so make sure that your needs match what they can offer. Spending a lot of time considering these factors upfront will save you a lot of headaches - and money - in the long run.
Tip #2: Set yourself a budget before starting.
Once you've chosen some dating services that you think are a good fit, starting comparing prices. While you shouldn't shy away from a interesting option just because it's a bit more expensive than the others, you definitely want to have a budget in mind. This budget should be a kind of "experimentation" budget. In other words, ask yourself how much you're willing to "lose" in order to experiment with a dating service. While you should never assume the worst, you have to assume that you're going to have to spend some money before you find your soulmate. By setting yourself a budget, you'll become more comfortable with spending a bit of cash on a dating service, and you'll also set yourself a point at which you'll stop if it just isn't working for you.
Tip #3: Write down a description of what you're looking for in a soulmate.
The first step of a starting with a dating service is an interview where you'll be asked questions about yourself, and what you're looking for. You want to make the most of the interview, because that's how the dating service will search for singles for you. So it's a good idea to write down what you're looking for before you begin. By taking the time to really think about what your ideal date would be like, and then writing it down, you're going to paint a clearer picture of what you actually want in a soulmate. The better this picture is - and the closer it is to what you NEED in partner, and not what you WANT in one - the better your dates will be.
Tip #4: Get some quality face-time with a prospective service provider.
One of the great things about dating services is that you get something which is getting very rare these days: quality face-to-face time with someone (or at least, phone-to-phone time). This face-to-face time usually takes the form of an "interview," where the dating service gets to know what you're looking for. Make sure to squeeze all you can from this interview. Personalized service is great, so don't let yourself be rushed at any point. Answer all the questions they have for you truthfully, but also, ask them anything you want. Take your time. Get their advice. You never know what you may learn, and the more they know about you, the better your matches will be.
Tip #5: You're the boss, so make sure they do the work for you.
A dating service is just that: a service. You're paying someone to look for potential matches for you - so make sure they look hard. Don't be afraid to ask questions, to be critical of matches they've made, to give them constructive feedback, and to do anything else that you feel will help them find great dates for you... and that will make your life a little easier. Remember, a dating service can be a great time saver if you put the onus on them to work hard for you. And they're not just there to listen: so don't forget to ask questions. Pick their brains and squeeze them for everything they've got... it's one of the nice perks of hiring a dating service.
Tip #6: Be upfront about the fact that you're using a dating service.
Don't be shy about the fact that you're using a dating service, either with the people you meet on that service, or with your friends or family. Instead, be proud of the fact that you're taking matters into your own hands, and taking a very proactive approach to meeting people. By taking this position, you'll come across as being confident, instead of being insecure. This will help you on the dates you get through your service: by being upfront and confident about the fact that you're using a dating service, you'll put your date (who may be insecure about it) at ease, and instantly break the ice. Have fun with it. Laugh about it. It'll make your date that much more pleasant.
Tip #7: Make sure your behavior on a date is in line with your dating service.
Make sure your behavior on a date is in line with your dating service. What does that mean? Quite simply this: if you decide to go with a dating service designed for young business professionals, don't show to up to a date you got with your service dressed in ripped jeans and an old t-shirt. Remember that by definition, a dating service is matching you up with other members of that service, which means that you're joining a group of like-minded individuals. This is one of the big advantages of going with a service, because you have a pretty good idea of what kind of people you're going to be matched with. So make sure that you fit in to that group.
2017.03.23 14:30 shesmahoneylove One amazing year!
http://i.imgur.com/8WUzBrW.jpg
TL;DR: M52 finds F39 - Just be yourself and don’t get discouraged.
I wanted to post this 9 months ago because as many of us who have spent a bit of time on OKC can attest to, a successful three month relationship that began there should be something to celebrate! I had a good feeling about this one, but one year seemed like the real success goal… so I waited.
I had come from a 12 year marriage that ended amicably (mostly) in 2010, had two marvellous kids, and I was in my mid-40s and felt I wanted to find “The One”, but I also realized I needed to recover from my failed marriage and heal myself from what I had suffered because of it, so I waited a year and did the work I needed to on myself.
By mid-2011 I felt I was in a good place in my life so it was time. I tried Lavalife, Match, POF, Tinder, Bumble, Coffee Meets Bagel, etc., and of course OKC. I made all the mistakes. I fell in love with profiles. I rushed things. I took rejection too personally. I made a mess of my ego. During those five years I’m sure I had at least 100 first dates, 20 or so second dates, a few that went three or four dates in, and two that lasted a little over six months, but none of these people ‘fit’ the way I wanted or needed. After five years, I can say I met some wonderful people, some incredible flakes, collected some very interesting stories, had a bit of fun, and learned a lot about myself – mostly who I was and what I wanted for this next part of my life. With that said, I was also becoming discouraged. It was March 2016 and I had just gone through a span of six months in which I was either not being sparked by anyone or they were not being sparked by me. I had come to the point where OKC had become stagnant with what seemed like mutual disinterest. I was ready to take the spring and maybe summer off from dating, but one Saturday morning in mid-March I was up at 6am for some reason, and I found myself on OKC hoping to find the desperate new members who signed up after a lonely Friday at home alone. (sounds kind of predatory, huh?) To be honest, I was the one who had just had the lonely Friday night at home alone. Again.
Logging in and with barely a few sips of coffee in me there she was, and there was that smile! She was the first one in the line of “suggested” members OKC had picked for me. No need for coffee now, I was awake! She was a total 10! Clicking through her pics, 10, 10, 10, 9 and 10! Reading through her profile and the Questions section, only convinced me further that I had better start a conversation. She was at the lower range of my age range, so I didn’t hold out much hope based on recent history and the way things work in the dating world, but what did I have to lose, right? So I messaged her – damn the fact it was 6AM and it might seem weird!
Let me pause this narrative for a moment now. When I was still searching and one of these success posts would show up in this sub, or if anyone here would brag about their success-rate, I always wondered what kind of magic messages were they sending to cause this? I read all the posts here describing how to message someone properly, and it turns out it was merely common sense: keep it conversational as if you were meeting them for the first time in real life, maybe add a bit of humour, find something in their profile that piques your curiosity and touch on it to show your interest and that you invested some of your own time to get to know them, and don’t overwhelm them with a wall of text (unlike what I’m doing here). It’s what I’ve always tried to do with a few exceptions, but I was always still curious about how others did it. So I’m including my first message here for the future benefit of human-kind and /okcupid, and show that you don’t need to neg, be rude, make a pun from their name, or pull some copypasta from here or /tinder. YMMV.
A bit of background; she mentioned on her profile that breakfast was her favourite meal of the day and The Affair was listed as one of the TV shows she liked…
Hi,
You seem like someone I should like to know.
Mental check boxes were certainly being checked as I read! So how much are you looking forward to this next season of The Affair? The plot twists late last season, or at least the ones hinted at certainly weren't what I was expecting! I'm constantly cycling through love, hate, and indifference for almost all of the characters.
Have you tried Fanny Chadwick's? I think it's one of the better breakfast spots in town. Lunch and dinner places are easy to find, but breakfast is always a tough one. Care to share one of yours, maybe even in person sometime?
shesmahoneylove
It was quickly replied to with…
Good morning shesmahoneylove.
First off I love that you mentioned my two favourite things breakfast and the affair!!!! I frequent Fran’s a lot! I think breakfast/coffee/good company is a perfect first date btw. ;)
So how are you spending your sunny Saturday morning?
Honeylove
She was getting ready for work at 9:00am but told me she just had to respond before she left. We continued to message back and forth on OKC for most of that morning, moved it to texting early afternoon, and then we spoke on the phone later that night. There was much texting and calls and flirting that followed for the next few days, and then the following Wednesday we met for a date. It was at a casual local bar, and she picked me up at my place. First impressions: I thought she had great potential to be The One. She thought my sense of humour was weird but saw something there worth sticking around for.
The date was a success. I won’t bore/titillate you with it or the next 12 months, but we’ve had tons of fun together, travelled, hung out weekends at the cottage during the summer, met each other’s kids and family (and they’ve met each other!), and now we’re discussing possible future nuptials and how we’ll painlessly blend our families. Can’t wait!
(And yes, this is a throwaway for a few reasons. I don’t want to connect my previous posts and comments here with our faces)
submitted by shesmahoneylove to OkCupid [link] [comments]
TL;DR: M52 finds F39 - Just be yourself and don’t get discouraged.
I wanted to post this 9 months ago because as many of us who have spent a bit of time on OKC can attest to, a successful three month relationship that began there should be something to celebrate! I had a good feeling about this one, but one year seemed like the real success goal… so I waited.
I had come from a 12 year marriage that ended amicably (mostly) in 2010, had two marvellous kids, and I was in my mid-40s and felt I wanted to find “The One”, but I also realized I needed to recover from my failed marriage and heal myself from what I had suffered because of it, so I waited a year and did the work I needed to on myself.
By mid-2011 I felt I was in a good place in my life so it was time. I tried Lavalife, Match, POF, Tinder, Bumble, Coffee Meets Bagel, etc., and of course OKC. I made all the mistakes. I fell in love with profiles. I rushed things. I took rejection too personally. I made a mess of my ego. During those five years I’m sure I had at least 100 first dates, 20 or so second dates, a few that went three or four dates in, and two that lasted a little over six months, but none of these people ‘fit’ the way I wanted or needed. After five years, I can say I met some wonderful people, some incredible flakes, collected some very interesting stories, had a bit of fun, and learned a lot about myself – mostly who I was and what I wanted for this next part of my life. With that said, I was also becoming discouraged. It was March 2016 and I had just gone through a span of six months in which I was either not being sparked by anyone or they were not being sparked by me. I had come to the point where OKC had become stagnant with what seemed like mutual disinterest. I was ready to take the spring and maybe summer off from dating, but one Saturday morning in mid-March I was up at 6am for some reason, and I found myself on OKC hoping to find the desperate new members who signed up after a lonely Friday at home alone. (sounds kind of predatory, huh?) To be honest, I was the one who had just had the lonely Friday night at home alone. Again.
Logging in and with barely a few sips of coffee in me there she was, and there was that smile! She was the first one in the line of “suggested” members OKC had picked for me. No need for coffee now, I was awake! She was a total 10! Clicking through her pics, 10, 10, 10, 9 and 10! Reading through her profile and the Questions section, only convinced me further that I had better start a conversation. She was at the lower range of my age range, so I didn’t hold out much hope based on recent history and the way things work in the dating world, but what did I have to lose, right? So I messaged her – damn the fact it was 6AM and it might seem weird!
Let me pause this narrative for a moment now. When I was still searching and one of these success posts would show up in this sub, or if anyone here would brag about their success-rate, I always wondered what kind of magic messages were they sending to cause this? I read all the posts here describing how to message someone properly, and it turns out it was merely common sense: keep it conversational as if you were meeting them for the first time in real life, maybe add a bit of humour, find something in their profile that piques your curiosity and touch on it to show your interest and that you invested some of your own time to get to know them, and don’t overwhelm them with a wall of text (unlike what I’m doing here). It’s what I’ve always tried to do with a few exceptions, but I was always still curious about how others did it. So I’m including my first message here for the future benefit of human-kind and /okcupid, and show that you don’t need to neg, be rude, make a pun from their name, or pull some copypasta from here or /tinder. YMMV.
A bit of background; she mentioned on her profile that breakfast was her favourite meal of the day and The Affair was listed as one of the TV shows she liked…
Hi,
You seem like someone I should like to know.
Mental check boxes were certainly being checked as I read! So how much are you looking forward to this next season of The Affair? The plot twists late last season, or at least the ones hinted at certainly weren't what I was expecting! I'm constantly cycling through love, hate, and indifference for almost all of the characters.
Have you tried Fanny Chadwick's? I think it's one of the better breakfast spots in town. Lunch and dinner places are easy to find, but breakfast is always a tough one. Care to share one of yours, maybe even in person sometime?
shesmahoneylove
It was quickly replied to with…
Good morning shesmahoneylove.
First off I love that you mentioned my two favourite things breakfast and the affair!!!! I frequent Fran’s a lot! I think breakfast/coffee/good company is a perfect first date btw. ;)
So how are you spending your sunny Saturday morning?
Honeylove
She was getting ready for work at 9:00am but told me she just had to respond before she left. We continued to message back and forth on OKC for most of that morning, moved it to texting early afternoon, and then we spoke on the phone later that night. There was much texting and calls and flirting that followed for the next few days, and then the following Wednesday we met for a date. It was at a casual local bar, and she picked me up at my place. First impressions: I thought she had great potential to be The One. She thought my sense of humour was weird but saw something there worth sticking around for.
The date was a success. I won’t bore/titillate you with it or the next 12 months, but we’ve had tons of fun together, travelled, hung out weekends at the cottage during the summer, met each other’s kids and family (and they’ve met each other!), and now we’re discussing possible future nuptials and how we’ll painlessly blend our families. Can’t wait!
(And yes, this is a throwaway for a few reasons. I don’t want to connect my previous posts and comments here with our faces)
2016.08.16 00:26 nonononoandno My experiences with online dating like CL, POF, Match, OKC, LL & e-H
My experiences with online dating sites.
I'm 46. I'm a fairly handsome man, tall, blonde, glasses, average body type, not fat nor slim, just a hint of a belly, and I have many times been told I have really good skin and look younger than my age like someone in their 30's. The only thing really hinting of my real age is my slightly receded hairline and the thing I guess could be working against me in some women's view is that I fancy a short beard and mustache. I'm straight, single, live at my own place and I have a job. I could easily go for just sex, but I am mostly out to find someone I could love and be happy with.
Ok, I realize this will draw a lot of heat on me right away, but the women I find around my age are almost all not attractive to me. A female who seems young, healthy and fertile telling my ape mind that her hip-waist-breast ratio still can bear me healthy children will grab my interest. So I find myself looking for mid 20's to early 40's, preferably still without children, and of course I'm shallow enough to not find women past due the look of youth or anything that announces fat attractive. At all. Not even skinny women in the target group that look weird in some way will get my attention. So I guess I am aiming for what every other dude targets as well. I know I got myself to blame on that, and that is ok.
But having been in a relationship for more than a decade I have not tried dating sites until now when my relationship finally ended. I say finally, it has been many bad years we still have stayed together even though we shouldn't, because of offspring and economic reasons.
Dating online nowadays really seem to suck. I did my research and tried the biggest ones on the market. I refuse to pay unless I see that something is worth paying for, and so far that is highly doubtful. What is worst are not even the bots or scammers, but the fact that no one even seems to look at my profile. I don't know if I am drowning in real dudes and fake accounts and land on page 127 of any woman's search, or what really is the problem, but someone should try to do something about it.
I tried Craigslist (CL) first. I put up an ad with a nice regular presentation of myself, no dick pics or standing flexing my muscles in the bathroom mirror with a hard on in my tight underwear, just a regular face & upper body pic of me smiling a bit awkwardly, since I'm far from used to taking selfies all the time. Well that resulted in one answer from some 19 year old Latina girl that fairly soon faded out to nothing. She gave me her number and when I called her she just annoyed me. I also looked at the existing ads. I mainly looked at the women seeking men (w4m) department since the casual encounters (wfm) seemed a bit too ... much for me. I even tried to meet up with a mid 20's girl I found there for pure sex, we talked over the phone for quite a while first and it seemed to go fairly ok, but she never had (succeeded in) sending me her picture, and when she came by her anatomy unfortunately revolted me since she was very much overweight. I guess I should have been less tactful on the phone and just straight out asked her if she was fat. We sat on my couch and talked for a while, her mostly staring straight ahead and not at me, and I had absolutely no desire to go any further, so she went back home. At least she was real and not just out for my money, although a little weird. I had mailed with another girl that had answered another of my CL ads for pure sex, but she wanted to set up some sugarbaby arrangement. Sorry, I'm just not really ready to pay for sex yet, my ego still insist on getting it for free.
I proceeded to use Plenty Of Fish (POF). I wrote a long detailed funny informative text about myself and what I wanted, but even though I have been there a while and visited and written quite a few ladies I hardly have had any responses. POF has a few tests (5) and I took the "Chemistry Assessment" to check it out. I have not really used it though so I can't say what I really think about it. The good of the site is that it obviously is free, you can send and receive messages and even perform advanced searches without being prompted to pay up. It also has this "Meet Me" feature where you can see pictures of women and rate them Yes, Maybe or No. A Yes or Maybe seems to put you on a Match list that if they liked your picture too gives you an alert that you have a mutual match. Not sure how great this is since I only have had 2 matches and they never replied to my outreach, but it's a feature... It is also free to see who viewed you. Quite a few it seems look at me but never write me. I'm not sure what I am doing wrong, but it is not working. Maybe I'm just not good looking enough for them. Or the fact that it is free and relatively easy to join and put in a profile means it is smack packed with competition.
Next one was Match.com that I've heard so much about. Fat disappointment. I am currently 3 days into testing the site on a 7 day free test account and I have at least 2-3 times the amount of interest from bots or scammers than from real people. Seriously, it's not a good site. There are a lot of profiles on there, and many of them attractive enough, but the main problem is all the spam. That plus that I still have only received 1 response on my 70 sent out messages. That response was also a single word response on one of my more stupid attempts to an outreach so it really wont count. I have also chatted with a couple "Nigerian princesses" and Olga from Russia that wanted money so they could come by and see me. What annoyed me most with the site is that it seems to be stuck in the 2000's with very small profile pics. I am on a big screen home computer and I have the space. They also have a chat feature, but it seldom give you any result nearby, which to me is surprisingly bad. The daily "matches" provided seems random as well and the infrastructure of the site is frustrating and unappealing to the eye. I will likely end my trial way before the 7 days are over, that's how bad it all is.
Next one was OkCupid. Finally a site that seems to take it all seriously. The site structure is modern and fluent. The design pleasing. And they have this multi questionnaire that if you answer enough questions is supposed to pair you up with potential partners that fit your specific mindset. I've answered 444 questions so far - I think it's rather fun - and I have a 99.8 highest match possible, although I found after googling it that that number is not necessarily related to an actual person in the database, just a mathematical possibility, I think the highest comparability number I've seen on a profile is 93%. They also have a Quickmatch function where you see the full profile of people and either X or * them for later that I find quite useful since it is time saving and practical. The site is mainly free but you can pay to get some extras like advanced filters for your searches. These filters include specific body types, attractiveness, personality - this one is quite an interesting feature actually, and matches to the answer on a specific questionnaire question. There are also some other advantages like that you can see who "likes" you (that Starred you instead of X-ed you), and the chat seems modern, spacious and functional. I noticed that if I searched for narrower age groups (like 35-35 years old) I got more of the high match results for this section than if I searched for 22-42. And there doesn't seem to be many fake profiles on, I only encountered 2 or 3 so far and then were quite obvious asking you to go to this or that site. And most profiles actually seem to have something written in them, to compare with POF and Match where many times the presentations were just one or two fairly blend sentences long. I only have a few wishes about this site, that you could get better search results on Match%, as well as that you could sort those results on how many questions they actually answered since if you have a 90% comparability rate with someone that only answered 5 questions it really isn't that reassuring on how great you would be for each other. And distance from you. Sort of a search within a search, inception. Having the first lines from the self summary popping up in searches somehow would also be great. The only problem I have with this site, as with all the others is that I simply don't seem to get a lot of hits. Even though I've been writing several women.
And when I say written I mean I tried every kind of approach, funny, stupid, pickup lines, commenting on their profile text, questions, even really long presentations pouring myself out, really trying to make an investment. But nothing.
Some of my first messages on these sites were: - Ok, hypothetical first date with me?: We smoke pot and have sex all night in a tent on a hike in Yosemite and then base jump from Point Hike the next morning before going back on my motorcycle? One to five stars of likelihood? - You seem really cool. Want to meet? - (to a 6ft tall girl) - Want to meet eye to eye some day? As long as you don't wear heels it shouldn't be a problem :D - (to a 93% Match) - Hi, we seem to have a fairly high comparability rate, care to check me out? - (to someone that said they were a Feminist, even had it in their profile name) - You keep namedropping Feminism but you don't really explain what value aspects of it you have. Just curious... - I'm not sure what to write here to get a reply. It seems like whatever I say it really doesn't matter. I guess that if you don't find my profile pic appealing enough I just have to accept silence, but it would be nice to try to pursue romanticizing you. - (to someone that claimed they were half Italian) - I went inter-railing in Italy in my teens. Milan, Verona, Rimini. Ate one of the most fantastic pizzas ever in Milan. WE came to Milan late at night and still with our backpacks on we went looking for a restaurant. We only found one, and going inside we see it had these white tablecloths, an indication it would be way above our budget. But the lady of the restaurant ushers us in and we comply. She starts putting all kinds of stuff in front of us, bread sticks, salad, stuff like that and we (try to) explain to her that we want the very cheapest she has, but she keeps saying calma, calma. She seems to have taken a liking to us. So we chill. We order our pizzas. And I get this pizza in front of me that has so much filling it would be enough for 3 pizzas. Just wow. I can eat a lot but this one I can hardly finish. Half way through I stop eating and the lady comes to our table and asks if it is alright, if the pizza is no good. Or at least that's how I interpret it. I let her understand that it is "perfecto", but I need to wait. She goes on with a smile - "Ah pause?!" And when we finally finished she brings us this great little bowl of fruit to finish it off with. I could not not finish it, did not want her to feel rejected, and it is really good, but man, when we finally leave (after only paying for the pizzas) I more like roll outside. - One time I created a female profile just for fun (and research) and I was amazed at the steady stream of pure crap and needy messages that kept coming in. So I feel you. Now, I am super cool though, so you shouldn't miss out on talking with me, unless you are a f***ing dull person that doesn't enjoy a good convo.
So to sum it up. OkCupid seems like the best bet so far. I also tried Lavalife (that had like 1 profile in my target group that had logged in within reasonable time) that I couldn't log into again next day, even though I tried it from two different browsers. eHarmony was another try, but since I wouldn't pay I couldn't see any profile pics, and it kinda lost it's point directly then.
But I still don't get anything for it. Going out on the local nightclub is actually much more likely to give result, at least for me. Maybe I should just take that bartender course and see if I can get a job behind the bar instead.
submitted by nonononoandno to OkCupid [link] [comments]
I'm 46. I'm a fairly handsome man, tall, blonde, glasses, average body type, not fat nor slim, just a hint of a belly, and I have many times been told I have really good skin and look younger than my age like someone in their 30's. The only thing really hinting of my real age is my slightly receded hairline and the thing I guess could be working against me in some women's view is that I fancy a short beard and mustache. I'm straight, single, live at my own place and I have a job. I could easily go for just sex, but I am mostly out to find someone I could love and be happy with.
Ok, I realize this will draw a lot of heat on me right away, but the women I find around my age are almost all not attractive to me. A female who seems young, healthy and fertile telling my ape mind that her hip-waist-breast ratio still can bear me healthy children will grab my interest. So I find myself looking for mid 20's to early 40's, preferably still without children, and of course I'm shallow enough to not find women past due the look of youth or anything that announces fat attractive. At all. Not even skinny women in the target group that look weird in some way will get my attention. So I guess I am aiming for what every other dude targets as well. I know I got myself to blame on that, and that is ok.
But having been in a relationship for more than a decade I have not tried dating sites until now when my relationship finally ended. I say finally, it has been many bad years we still have stayed together even though we shouldn't, because of offspring and economic reasons.
Dating online nowadays really seem to suck. I did my research and tried the biggest ones on the market. I refuse to pay unless I see that something is worth paying for, and so far that is highly doubtful. What is worst are not even the bots or scammers, but the fact that no one even seems to look at my profile. I don't know if I am drowning in real dudes and fake accounts and land on page 127 of any woman's search, or what really is the problem, but someone should try to do something about it.
I tried Craigslist (CL) first. I put up an ad with a nice regular presentation of myself, no dick pics or standing flexing my muscles in the bathroom mirror with a hard on in my tight underwear, just a regular face & upper body pic of me smiling a bit awkwardly, since I'm far from used to taking selfies all the time. Well that resulted in one answer from some 19 year old Latina girl that fairly soon faded out to nothing. She gave me her number and when I called her she just annoyed me. I also looked at the existing ads. I mainly looked at the women seeking men (w4m) department since the casual encounters (wfm) seemed a bit too ... much for me. I even tried to meet up with a mid 20's girl I found there for pure sex, we talked over the phone for quite a while first and it seemed to go fairly ok, but she never had (succeeded in) sending me her picture, and when she came by her anatomy unfortunately revolted me since she was very much overweight. I guess I should have been less tactful on the phone and just straight out asked her if she was fat. We sat on my couch and talked for a while, her mostly staring straight ahead and not at me, and I had absolutely no desire to go any further, so she went back home. At least she was real and not just out for my money, although a little weird. I had mailed with another girl that had answered another of my CL ads for pure sex, but she wanted to set up some sugarbaby arrangement. Sorry, I'm just not really ready to pay for sex yet, my ego still insist on getting it for free.
I proceeded to use Plenty Of Fish (POF). I wrote a long detailed funny informative text about myself and what I wanted, but even though I have been there a while and visited and written quite a few ladies I hardly have had any responses. POF has a few tests (5) and I took the "Chemistry Assessment" to check it out. I have not really used it though so I can't say what I really think about it. The good of the site is that it obviously is free, you can send and receive messages and even perform advanced searches without being prompted to pay up. It also has this "Meet Me" feature where you can see pictures of women and rate them Yes, Maybe or No. A Yes or Maybe seems to put you on a Match list that if they liked your picture too gives you an alert that you have a mutual match. Not sure how great this is since I only have had 2 matches and they never replied to my outreach, but it's a feature... It is also free to see who viewed you. Quite a few it seems look at me but never write me. I'm not sure what I am doing wrong, but it is not working. Maybe I'm just not good looking enough for them. Or the fact that it is free and relatively easy to join and put in a profile means it is smack packed with competition.
Next one was Match.com that I've heard so much about. Fat disappointment. I am currently 3 days into testing the site on a 7 day free test account and I have at least 2-3 times the amount of interest from bots or scammers than from real people. Seriously, it's not a good site. There are a lot of profiles on there, and many of them attractive enough, but the main problem is all the spam. That plus that I still have only received 1 response on my 70 sent out messages. That response was also a single word response on one of my more stupid attempts to an outreach so it really wont count. I have also chatted with a couple "Nigerian princesses" and Olga from Russia that wanted money so they could come by and see me. What annoyed me most with the site is that it seems to be stuck in the 2000's with very small profile pics. I am on a big screen home computer and I have the space. They also have a chat feature, but it seldom give you any result nearby, which to me is surprisingly bad. The daily "matches" provided seems random as well and the infrastructure of the site is frustrating and unappealing to the eye. I will likely end my trial way before the 7 days are over, that's how bad it all is.
Next one was OkCupid. Finally a site that seems to take it all seriously. The site structure is modern and fluent. The design pleasing. And they have this multi questionnaire that if you answer enough questions is supposed to pair you up with potential partners that fit your specific mindset. I've answered 444 questions so far - I think it's rather fun - and I have a 99.8 highest match possible, although I found after googling it that that number is not necessarily related to an actual person in the database, just a mathematical possibility, I think the highest comparability number I've seen on a profile is 93%. They also have a Quickmatch function where you see the full profile of people and either X or * them for later that I find quite useful since it is time saving and practical. The site is mainly free but you can pay to get some extras like advanced filters for your searches. These filters include specific body types, attractiveness, personality - this one is quite an interesting feature actually, and matches to the answer on a specific questionnaire question. There are also some other advantages like that you can see who "likes" you (that Starred you instead of X-ed you), and the chat seems modern, spacious and functional. I noticed that if I searched for narrower age groups (like 35-35 years old) I got more of the high match results for this section than if I searched for 22-42. And there doesn't seem to be many fake profiles on, I only encountered 2 or 3 so far and then were quite obvious asking you to go to this or that site. And most profiles actually seem to have something written in them, to compare with POF and Match where many times the presentations were just one or two fairly blend sentences long. I only have a few wishes about this site, that you could get better search results on Match%, as well as that you could sort those results on how many questions they actually answered since if you have a 90% comparability rate with someone that only answered 5 questions it really isn't that reassuring on how great you would be for each other. And distance from you. Sort of a search within a search, inception. Having the first lines from the self summary popping up in searches somehow would also be great. The only problem I have with this site, as with all the others is that I simply don't seem to get a lot of hits. Even though I've been writing several women.
And when I say written I mean I tried every kind of approach, funny, stupid, pickup lines, commenting on their profile text, questions, even really long presentations pouring myself out, really trying to make an investment. But nothing.
Some of my first messages on these sites were: - Ok, hypothetical first date with me?: We smoke pot and have sex all night in a tent on a hike in Yosemite and then base jump from Point Hike the next morning before going back on my motorcycle? One to five stars of likelihood? - You seem really cool. Want to meet? - (to a 6ft tall girl) - Want to meet eye to eye some day? As long as you don't wear heels it shouldn't be a problem :D - (to a 93% Match) - Hi, we seem to have a fairly high comparability rate, care to check me out? - (to someone that said they were a Feminist, even had it in their profile name) - You keep namedropping Feminism but you don't really explain what value aspects of it you have. Just curious... - I'm not sure what to write here to get a reply. It seems like whatever I say it really doesn't matter. I guess that if you don't find my profile pic appealing enough I just have to accept silence, but it would be nice to try to pursue romanticizing you. - (to someone that claimed they were half Italian) - I went inter-railing in Italy in my teens. Milan, Verona, Rimini. Ate one of the most fantastic pizzas ever in Milan. WE came to Milan late at night and still with our backpacks on we went looking for a restaurant. We only found one, and going inside we see it had these white tablecloths, an indication it would be way above our budget. But the lady of the restaurant ushers us in and we comply. She starts putting all kinds of stuff in front of us, bread sticks, salad, stuff like that and we (try to) explain to her that we want the very cheapest she has, but she keeps saying calma, calma. She seems to have taken a liking to us. So we chill. We order our pizzas. And I get this pizza in front of me that has so much filling it would be enough for 3 pizzas. Just wow. I can eat a lot but this one I can hardly finish. Half way through I stop eating and the lady comes to our table and asks if it is alright, if the pizza is no good. Or at least that's how I interpret it. I let her understand that it is "perfecto", but I need to wait. She goes on with a smile - "Ah pause?!" And when we finally finished she brings us this great little bowl of fruit to finish it off with. I could not not finish it, did not want her to feel rejected, and it is really good, but man, when we finally leave (after only paying for the pizzas) I more like roll outside. - One time I created a female profile just for fun (and research) and I was amazed at the steady stream of pure crap and needy messages that kept coming in. So I feel you. Now, I am super cool though, so you shouldn't miss out on talking with me, unless you are a f***ing dull person that doesn't enjoy a good convo.
So to sum it up. OkCupid seems like the best bet so far. I also tried Lavalife (that had like 1 profile in my target group that had logged in within reasonable time) that I couldn't log into again next day, even though I tried it from two different browsers. eHarmony was another try, but since I wouldn't pay I couldn't see any profile pics, and it kinda lost it's point directly then.
But I still don't get anything for it. Going out on the local nightclub is actually much more likely to give result, at least for me. Maybe I should just take that bartender course and see if I can get a job behind the bar instead.
2014.07.17 22:50 storykbot triple-fudge hamplanet/ice cream monster and the online, unintentionally blind date
Friends, hello! I have been reading fat people stories for awhile now and I have been hesitant to contribute, lest my offering be found UNACCEPTABLE. I will try to make text green and format my story so that it doesn’t turn into a rolling wall of shit, but I am not so smart.
Harken back, all ye who would dare to read on – to a time in which I was a strapping young man of 23, freshly out of a relationship and also very handsome and burly (smelling faintly of pine trees, wood smoke and maple syrup I imagine). Throughout my life, I had always viewed the internet as the solution to all my various woes. Games, friendship, art, and possibly 18th century French erotica – the internet had it all. As I had just finished getting out of a long term relationship, I figured it was high time for me to get back into the dating scene. I turned as I always had, to the internet.
Almost immediately I cast my net into the virtual sea of ladies, hoping to pull them in with my clever words and bombastic personality. To be honest, I did not know what to expect of the experience as online dating (so far as I knew) was relatively a new thing and I was but a ruddy cheeked young fool. To my surprise, I apparently had attracted the attentions of someone who looked pretty cute! We exchanged pictures and even words over an archaic tool called ‘MSN Messenger’. She was neat! She played the bagpipes. Her pictures were many and they all looked pretty good. In hindsight, I should have asked her to take a picture of herself holding that day’s newspaper for verification.
But what did I know? No one lies on the internet, right?
We arranged to meet up in person. I was driving through her city on the way to see some friends that weekend and figured it would be a good time for us to finally meet face to face. I hopped in my pimpin’ 94’ Buick LeSabre (a retired gentlemen’s automobile) and rolled up to her place a short time later.
I got out of the car – this was it!
I sauntered up to the door, filled with false bravado.
My hand hovers over the screen door, ready to knock.
Then I see it. Standing at the counter with her back to me is a rather large and portly lady – I can’t see too well because it is dark inside and I am looking through a screen door. It could be anyone, right? Her mom? Her sister? A roommate? Anyone.
I knock.
The creature I see standing at the counter turns ponderously and waddles to the front door. She opens the door. I don’t recognize her.
She recognizes me though.
“storykbot?”
“Yes…icecreammonster?” (I will get to why I have named her thus)
It is her. Whatever resemblance she had to the pictures she had sent me was obscured by an additional (approximately) 75lbs worth of human flesh. She has clearly put this weight on recently, or so I guessed, judging by the fact that all her clothes were completely ill fitting. Her sides were spilling out of her flood pants and her tank top was much too short to be accommodating to her newfound girth.
She wraps her arms around me – it was a summer day and I assumed that she did not have air-conditioning as an atmosphere of humidity enveloped me and took away my ability to breath.
“Its so great to finally meet you!” she chirped
“yes, yes you too” I managed to choke out the words through my haze of disbelief
“we should get going! I know of this great place just down the street from here – called ‘the tea house’”
“Okay cool”, I lied. It was not cool.
For some reason she then puts on a tiny jacket that also clearly does not fit her. Also, it is still summer.
This is where I should have left. I have no issue with people who are overweight, but I have no tolerance for people who are blatantly dishonest and represent themselves as something that they are clearly not. But, being inexperienced and a bit taken aback, I didn’t want to seem like a dick .
We begin to walk down the street. We make small talk as we go. She is clearly sweating and close to death by the time we get to the ‘tea shoppe’.
As we enter the store, I belatedly realize that this is not really a ‘tea shoppe’ – it is a fucking ice cream parlour.
My mind is racing for ways to get out of this situation (I did not have a cell phone at the time) – I go to the fridge and get myself an ice team, damnit. As I wrap my hands around my refreshing beverage, I hear her saying something. As I turn around, I see the clerk piling what must have been 4 scoops of double fudge ice cream onto a waffle cone.
“TEE HEE – I love ice cream” she giggles.
Inside my mind I am screaming and I no longer feel in control of the situation.
We walk outside – she suggests we go to the park in order for her to consume her frozen treat.
As we are walking – I realize that this is also a bike/jogging path. Where fit people go to work out.
Remember how it is summer? It is still summer. Her mountain of ice cream begins to melt as we make our way through the park.
As several fit individuals exercise by, I can see their goggled eyed disbelief as this woman attempts to devour her mountain of ice cream. This is because as she is devouring it – the ice cream is melting. All over her face, down her jacket, down her pants, and all over shoes. I wish I was exaggerating for comedic effect – but I am not. The comedic effect was simply a by-product of the situation.
As this is happening, she is trying to keep it together. Eventually I suggest that we stop for a moment so that she can finish her ice cream. She agrees that this is a wise course of action. As we stop – I look out at the river for a moment. In that moment, she pulls a Garfield and literally inhales the remaining ice cream at once.
The ice cream is gone. All that is left is a sad woman – holding the wax napkin that they wrap the cone in – covered head to toe in ice cream dribble, looking at me as if I might have the solution to her issue. I do not. She tries to use the wax napkin to clean herself up with. It is not working. People are gawking.
She then washes her hands in the river.
I suggest we head back. As we do – she regales me with many tales of her previous relationship that I never wanted to hear. As we near my car I tell her I still have a drive ahead of me and should get going. When I finally get back to a computer later that weekend, I remove her from MSN and Lavalife and I file the experience away as a lesson learned.
submitted by storykbot to fatpeoplestories [link] [comments]
Harken back, all ye who would dare to read on – to a time in which I was a strapping young man of 23, freshly out of a relationship and also very handsome and burly (smelling faintly of pine trees, wood smoke and maple syrup I imagine). Throughout my life, I had always viewed the internet as the solution to all my various woes. Games, friendship, art, and possibly 18th century French erotica – the internet had it all. As I had just finished getting out of a long term relationship, I figured it was high time for me to get back into the dating scene. I turned as I always had, to the internet.
Almost immediately I cast my net into the virtual sea of ladies, hoping to pull them in with my clever words and bombastic personality. To be honest, I did not know what to expect of the experience as online dating (so far as I knew) was relatively a new thing and I was but a ruddy cheeked young fool. To my surprise, I apparently had attracted the attentions of someone who looked pretty cute! We exchanged pictures and even words over an archaic tool called ‘MSN Messenger’. She was neat! She played the bagpipes. Her pictures were many and they all looked pretty good. In hindsight, I should have asked her to take a picture of herself holding that day’s newspaper for verification.
But what did I know? No one lies on the internet, right?
We arranged to meet up in person. I was driving through her city on the way to see some friends that weekend and figured it would be a good time for us to finally meet face to face. I hopped in my pimpin’ 94’ Buick LeSabre (a retired gentlemen’s automobile) and rolled up to her place a short time later.
I got out of the car – this was it!
I sauntered up to the door, filled with false bravado.
My hand hovers over the screen door, ready to knock.
Then I see it. Standing at the counter with her back to me is a rather large and portly lady – I can’t see too well because it is dark inside and I am looking through a screen door. It could be anyone, right? Her mom? Her sister? A roommate? Anyone.
I knock.
The creature I see standing at the counter turns ponderously and waddles to the front door. She opens the door. I don’t recognize her.
She recognizes me though.
“storykbot?”
“Yes…icecreammonster?” (I will get to why I have named her thus)
It is her. Whatever resemblance she had to the pictures she had sent me was obscured by an additional (approximately) 75lbs worth of human flesh. She has clearly put this weight on recently, or so I guessed, judging by the fact that all her clothes were completely ill fitting. Her sides were spilling out of her flood pants and her tank top was much too short to be accommodating to her newfound girth.
She wraps her arms around me – it was a summer day and I assumed that she did not have air-conditioning as an atmosphere of humidity enveloped me and took away my ability to breath.
“Its so great to finally meet you!” she chirped
“yes, yes you too” I managed to choke out the words through my haze of disbelief
“we should get going! I know of this great place just down the street from here – called ‘the tea house’”
“Okay cool”, I lied. It was not cool.
For some reason she then puts on a tiny jacket that also clearly does not fit her. Also, it is still summer.
This is where I should have left. I have no issue with people who are overweight, but I have no tolerance for people who are blatantly dishonest and represent themselves as something that they are clearly not. But, being inexperienced and a bit taken aback, I didn’t want to seem like a dick .
We begin to walk down the street. We make small talk as we go. She is clearly sweating and close to death by the time we get to the ‘tea shoppe’.
As we enter the store, I belatedly realize that this is not really a ‘tea shoppe’ – it is a fucking ice cream parlour.
My mind is racing for ways to get out of this situation (I did not have a cell phone at the time) – I go to the fridge and get myself an ice team, damnit. As I wrap my hands around my refreshing beverage, I hear her saying something. As I turn around, I see the clerk piling what must have been 4 scoops of double fudge ice cream onto a waffle cone.
“TEE HEE – I love ice cream” she giggles.
Inside my mind I am screaming and I no longer feel in control of the situation.
We walk outside – she suggests we go to the park in order for her to consume her frozen treat.
As we are walking – I realize that this is also a bike/jogging path. Where fit people go to work out.
Remember how it is summer? It is still summer. Her mountain of ice cream begins to melt as we make our way through the park.
As several fit individuals exercise by, I can see their goggled eyed disbelief as this woman attempts to devour her mountain of ice cream. This is because as she is devouring it – the ice cream is melting. All over her face, down her jacket, down her pants, and all over shoes. I wish I was exaggerating for comedic effect – but I am not. The comedic effect was simply a by-product of the situation.
As this is happening, she is trying to keep it together. Eventually I suggest that we stop for a moment so that she can finish her ice cream. She agrees that this is a wise course of action. As we stop – I look out at the river for a moment. In that moment, she pulls a Garfield and literally inhales the remaining ice cream at once.
The ice cream is gone. All that is left is a sad woman – holding the wax napkin that they wrap the cone in – covered head to toe in ice cream dribble, looking at me as if I might have the solution to her issue. I do not. She tries to use the wax napkin to clean herself up with. It is not working. People are gawking.
She then washes her hands in the river.
I suggest we head back. As we do – she regales me with many tales of her previous relationship that I never wanted to hear. As we near my car I tell her I still have a drive ahead of me and should get going. When I finally get back to a computer later that weekend, I remove her from MSN and Lavalife and I file the experience away as a lesson learned.