1. Butterscotch Tele (don't know what either of those words mean, but you guys make it sound cool)
   
2. The red one
   

3.Fender
4.Midi Guitar with the big fat ass (excuse my french)
5.Eddie Van Halen Guitar (order mine in Rick Beato yellow, please!)

1. Any keytar
   
2. Jimi Hendrix
   
3. The one metal guitar with no head (how do you tune? Idk!)
   
4. Big Elvis Guitar in front of Memphis studio.
   
5. Guitar with lots of strings (very cool!)
   

Honorable Mentions:

1. Weird Adam Neely four string guitar (good for jazz?)
   
2. Davie504 6 string bass (pretty EPIC, right? See what I did there?)-kind of similar to the Adam Neely guitar but probably different, I don't know I'm not a doctor.
   
3. Cassio
   
4. Mary Spender blue guitar. Probably pretty Mary ExSPENive , am I right? Hahahahaha [LAUGHTER]
   
5. Brandon D'eon clammy sweat-stained acousticguitar. You just know that guitar tastes good.
   
6. Mary Big Spender. That's another pun you can make with her name
   

7.Steve Terreberry. Not any guitar of his, I just find his funny faces to be sooooooooooooo super funny. Here's hoping you shred your way into the cast of SNL Mr. T.

1. Colleenager Balls' Eucalyptis. Pretty cool epic vibes from this one. You did nothing wrong queen!!!!!!!!!!!!
   
2. SamuraiGuitarist sword guitar. He must have one, right? Why else would we call him that?
   
3. MartyMusic Acoustic Guitar. There's probably weed in there.
   
4. Gibbons guitar for the cool blues dudes with all of the epic sauce. Sauce isn't sperm, right? If so, I retract my previous statement
   
5. My cousin's beat up guitar. He has lots of sex which makes it automatically cool [Imagine like 15 sunglasses guy emojis, I'm on a computer]. So have I, but don't ask me to describe it.
   
6. Conjoined Twins guitar. Very funny.
   
7. Any of Tyler Larson's guitars. He has so many.
   

Woweeeeee, those were some awesome candididates for fthe most le epic guitaars!!!!! Sorry all of them couldn't be featured on this list, I am only human and not guitar, and therefore I am flawed. Comment what guitars you like and what guitarists turn you on in the comments below. Rememeber, allry guitars are super epic, accept for Hellow Kitty guitar because that is for gay girls and regular girls and gay guys. Just kidding, I luv the hellow kitty guitaro doggy woggo!!!!!!!! Keep on shredding those tabs, and I'll see you next time on the battlebus! I LOVE GUITARS WOWOWOWOWOOOOWWWWWWWWOOWOOWOWOWWWWWOOOWWWWWOOOWOWOOWOWOWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stormblood seems a bit difficult for me and the others compared to the other games but it’s just quite simple where the Seventh Dawn visited Ala Mingho, learned about the people there were Zenos’s victims. While having a fun break and a tour around the area after beating that Darth Vader like King Thordan and the vengeful dragon named Nidhogg. We had a full bunch of hope and pumped to defeat the imperials control super quickly but it didn’t turned out really easy. So one night, Zenos visited the Ranglers Reach, bullied everyone with his gangs, the WOL challenged him but the bully was too powerful so the WOL was easily beaten up by the big Samurai Zenos. The next day, we or those who were assuming that Zenos was weaker were all so sad, depressed, disappointed, and despondent, about to destroy and give up our plans and hopes but Alphinald brought up a genius plan so we traveled to Japan and China which also suffered with the same kinda problems with a 100 ton ship to stop the imperial control in East Asia , help the victims out there, stop the woman named Yotsuru psychopath (A weaker version of Zenos). A woman who was traumatized about her childhood abuse from her parents and appealing herself that her parents made a monster like this as a revenge to them, get some more allies or friends like in Kugane, we met Soroban from Ninja Turtles or Hien from some kind of Demon slayer character, or like those cool fancy looking strong friends first as a training to fight Zenos again at the end game. It sounded fun and exciting to meet new people and team up but that didn’t go very easy. We were asked to do some quests in each area to gain the people’s trust. You guys think Kugane was such a major place but it wasn’t. It’s more like a sightseeing destination in FF14 so ignore it when it comes to the major story plot. In the Ruby Sea, the people living there suffered from the imperial Kojin’s control. In the Azim Steppe, there were 2 species of Au Ra and one of the species were extremely powerful but the other was extremely weak so we helped the weaker Au Ra to end the rivalry between the 2 species of Au Ra. The weak gets revenge on the strong one. And in Yanxia, we focused main on stopping Yotsuru and that freak surpporting Yotsuru.

Successor : u/Typical-Foundation94
GUYS...I did it, it finally happened for me.This is going to be such a long post but I promise you it's worth it.
First of all thank you admins for deleting my post a few months ago, thank God I don't have it saved anywhere to see how pathetic I was probably.
Background:
I met this guy after a terrible break up from a long term relationship and he was everything I ever wanted. Actually, I know I manifested him to start with because I was imagining us together and I just "had a feeling" he was into me even when I was in the long term relationship (towards the end of it).
He was crazy about me just as I imagined. Until he wasn't. I started being all paranoid and insecure that him moving cities will be the end of us and no matter what he would tell me I just knew that we weren't going to last. I was heart broken when he actually told me he can't carry on and that maybe we can cross paths again in the future but he had too much in his life at the time (I don't want to go into detail but to be honest, if I was him, in those given circumstances, I would have said bye too, especially when my mind did this).
Anyway, the break up happened. I was literally devastated. Not because I loved him, I did have feelings for him, but we only dated for a few months. But because I wanted it to be him so badly. When we started dating, I told myself, he will be my husband, no matter what he is the one. So I stuck with that.
As embarrassed as I am to admit, I went all crazy into psychic readings and ended up in so much debt from taking on loans to get the most expensive readings. I would probably do 10-15 readings a day. Spells too, of course. We all know that level of desperation...it was bad. I cringe looking back at myself. I would do all possible spells and mantras I found on tiktok and scripting and everything. Nothing was working!!! I did that for 4 months. YUCKS, I KNOW. It drained me. However, I know for a fact he "would come back". I knew this from the moment he can't do this anymore. Because one thing about me, they ALL come back and I never lose, ever. I am stubborn as shit. So I knew I had to do anything to get this man. But again nothing was working..all the psychics telling me he'd be back by this date got it all wrong. I still had hope until I lost it all.
Around January-February I came across this community and I began reading it like desperate. I found Neville Goddard. I read it all. I started binge watching all the youtube videos, Sammy Ingram, Roxy, Joseph Alai, Missy Renee, Amanda from Create your Future. I watched it all!!! But that was all I was doing it I was watching it. I did not apply shit.
End of February I decide to get coaching with Sammy Ingram (really don't recommend it at all..huge waste of money and it was nothing like I expected it). She gave me a list of affirmations so I started affirming all day everyday. Somehow, things started moving a bit and I was gaining confidence. But it wasn't enough. I was saying those affirmations like I was trying to change something outside of me, it was all so so exhausting. 1st of April we meet face to face for the first time since the break up and I was so so confident I am on the right path. We met at work but he was lovely, I could see he kept trying to gain my attention and he was complimenting me. Then it stopped. I spiraled badly, I gave up sooooo many times but somehow still persisted. What was I doing wrong? why did all these people get their SP but I can't seem to get shit.
April was pretty bad - I kept pushing through though. Not a single day I stopped affirming and believing that although I feel like absolute crap, this will work and I will get what I want, sometime in the future. But boy, it was a journey!!!!
May-June I started talking to a different guy and he was literally parotting all my affirmations back to me. Everything I wanted SP to tell me I was getting it from him. I was so frustrated. He was an amazing guy, but he was not my SP. I even thought giving up on SP and taking the new guy seriously but no, that was not my end goal. I still did not understand why was this new one telling me I would be an amazing wife, I am stunning, I am so confident, he hasn't met anyone like me, he wanted to spend all his time with me, literally everything I wanted SP to do/say.
Throughout all this time, actually mostly from May onwards I kept testing the law, with small things, just to build my confidence. From manifesting avocado to show up in my fridge (yeah I know, but I needed something weird), to a pay rise (stupidly I manifested the exact amount, had I known I would have gone 10k more LOL), changing friends' minds, a free manifesting session with one of the coaches from Create your Future, etc. I needed something to make me feel I am truly God. So I thought, let me do what I know best, get my insecurities in the way of a relationship. I started telling myself that things with the new guy are going too well, that he isn't interested, that he feels there is something missing.
That's when I knew...I did it. A week later he ghosted me, for a day. So my thoughts created. I text him and he replies saying he just isn't sure of where things are going and we might be better off as friends. I read his text and I said "oh no darling, you are so gutted this is ending, you don't know what you are saying", so he replies back to my text saying he actually feels pretty sad this is ending because he really had high hopes and could see this going somewhere. It was at this moment, I knew it. We stayed friends though, I am happy to have him in my life as a friend, I never wanted anything more long term anyway.
But it was not enough. By this time, I was feeling my affirmations natural to me. I could feel I am truly the love of my SP's life, I could feel I am the only one he wants. But it was all "going to happen in the future". I didn't feel comfortable with that but it was somehow ok.
Beginning of July I get really drunk and I text SP. I thought about texting him for weeks before but I was stubborn and didn't want to do it. I didn't do it from a place of lack. I did it from a place of "whatever, I don't even care if he doesn't respond or what he thinks, I just know his heart will skip a beat when he'll see my text". I simply could not understand why I did not have any anxiety or fears and trust me it was not just the alcohol. I just wanted to do it and didn't think about it twice again. I texted him really late at night saying "I miss you". I got so drunk I completely forgot I texted him but oh well I woke up the next morning with a text from him saying he misses me too. I mean...I knew it, I wasn't shocked or anything. The conversation keeps flowing and flowing with him texting me instantly and telling me he got really drunk too and that I deserve the world and he can't come any close to that and he loved everything we ever had and it was so hard to let it go. I got annoyed and I said oh whatever pretend it never happened then. He then turned around and said he doesn't want to pretend it didn't happen, he misses me too but he is scared of us getting hurt because of the distance. So I then just played it cool.
That's when I started spiraling again. It was HELL. I thought none of it worked, all my time was wasted, all I ever did and prayed and affirmed was in vain. He proposes we meet the next time he comes down and speak about it in person and he kept saying I don't seem to care about us. I replied and said yeah ofc let's do a drink. Left of delivered. For 2 weeks.
Not a single day I stopped affirming. Then one day, I let myself cry my eyes out. One thing during all these months, since the break up, I did not let myself feel anything or cry. I refused to be weak or to acknowledge any fears. So I looked up in the mirror and I let the tears roll, I was screaming how I need to let it all out and get back on the train now or never, I kept telling myself I never lose. I decided to go back to Neville. I read Feeling is The Secret again. I read it again and again and again. IT CLICKED - IT FINALLY CLICKED FOR ME. Guys, when Neville says there is no one to change but self, I wish I was better at explaining stuff, but please only take this and let it marinate. You are not changing your SP with your affirmations, you are changing you. I realised ALL these months what I was doing was thinking OF my desire, instead of thinking FROM my desire. I knew my desire was a promise to me but something was missing. I started affirming as if I was already in the most beautiful relationship ever with SP. It felt SO natural!!!!
I had a vivid dream one night after trying to do SATS (I could never do it, until that night, when I fell asleep as if I was already his girlfriend, because in my mind, I was, and what other reality is there than the one I create?!) and he came up to me from behind kissing my neck and telling me "what, you thought I would let you go again this time?". GUYS it felt so real...the kiss, his words, everything. I had never had a dream about him before and I always had this belief, that once you dream about them...they are on their way back to you.
I was still on delivered though...I didn't care. In my mind, I was with him for a year, having the best relationship ever, being loved, cared for, cherished, etc.
He texts back and we meet up, finally. WORD BY WORD...everything I have been affirming all these months. How proud he is of me, how stunning I am, how I am the only woman he wants to be with, how he doesn't care about the distance and wants to be with me, how he never had this connection with anyone else.
I DID IT.
Did I think it was possible? HELL YES. Did I doubt? HELL YES. Not that I would have it though, but when. Time was my biggest issue here. I was a slave to the time.
When it clicked for me, it all unfolded naturally. I realised after so long my desire is not separate from me. I don't affirm to get him back to me, I affirm to CHANGE MYSELF and become the version of me that has that relationship. I read this probably 10,000 times, I never got it, until it all clicked. I could have had it anytime, I was the only one delaying it.
GUYS PLEASE DO NOT GIVE UP! please go back to Neville and get off the forums, get off youtube, and do the work. Once you do the work and follow Neville, it is inevitable. You are your desire. You can have your SP anytime you want now. Feel like you are with your SP now, live your life as if you had your SP on their knees in front of you yesterday. Live from that scene, don't think of it!!!
Please try this even for a few days, it will change your life. Never doubt the law, it works.

Story Recap (From Heavensward)
Heavensward
Heavensward is a story of playing Hide And Seek with Thordan VII. So Ishgard was suffering with a war between the dragons for a 1000 years. Mr. Thordan VII thew bunch of lies towards us about the dragon war saying Nidhogg is defeated. So we had to go to tons of places and meet tons of dragons and we learned the truth of the Dragon War. So we found out that Thordan I and his twelve knights aimed to steal Nidhoggs eye. Nidhogg killed Thordan I and some other knights but Haldrath successfully stole the eye of Nidhogg to avenge his dad, and Nidhogg and the other dragons got extremely mad and even a 1000 years, still with hatred and doubt towards human beings. So at level 57, from around the Vault, Thordan VII was a coward and he started to know that his lies were busted and started going to Azys Lla. We defeated Bismarck but Thordan VII stole the key and made us not enter Azys Lla. So we went all the way back to Ishgard and made Cid to created an upgraded version of our airship which successfully rip the wall of Azys Lla. Then we looked for Thordan, found him in the facility and he became King Thordan and fought him, successfully defeating him.
Stormblood
Stormblood seems a bit difficult for me and the others compared to the other games but it’s just quite simple where the Seventh Dawn visited Ala Mingho, learned about the people there were Zenos’s victims. While having a fun break and a tour around the area after beating that Darth Vader like King Thordan and the vengeful dragon named Nidhogg. We had a full bunch of hope and pumped to defeat the imperials control super quickly but it didn’t turned out really easy. So one night, Zenos visited the Ranglers Reach, bullied everyone with his gangs, the WOL challenged him but the bully was too powerful so the WOL was easily beaten up by the big Samurai Zenos. The next day, we or those who were assuming that Zenos was weaker were all so sad, depressed, disappointed, and despondent, about to destroy and give up our plans and hopes but Alphinald brought up a genius plan so we traveled to Japan and China which also suffered with the same kinda problems with a 100 ton ship to stop the imperial control in East Asia , help the victims out there, stop the woman named Yotsuru psychopath (A weaker version of Zenos). A woman who was traumatized about her childhood abuse from her parents and appealing herself that her parents made a monster like this as a revenge to them, get some more allies or friends like in Kugane, we met Soroban from Ninja Turtles or Hien from some kind of Demon slayer character, or like those cool fancy looking strong friends first as a training to fight Zenos again at the end game. It sounded fun and exciting to meet new people and team up but that didn’t go very easy. We were asked to do some quests in each area to gain the people’s trust. You guys think Kugane was such a major place but it wasn’t. It’s more like a sightseeing destination in FF14 so ignore it when it comes to the major story plot. In the Ruby Sea, the people living there suffered from the imperial Kojin’s control. In the Azim Steppe, there were 2 species of Au Ra and one of the species were extremely powerful but the other was extremely weak so we helped the weaker Au Ra to end the rivalry between the 2 species of Au Ra. The weak gets revenge on the strong one. And in Yanxia, we focused main on stopping Yotsuru and that freak surpporting Yotsuru.
Shadowbringers
The game FF14 SHADOWBRINGERS is basically bringing back the darkness. Opposite from FF3. So you enter the dream world named Norvrandt, the sky was too bright so it was kinda weird. The reason was there was these evil creatures named “Sin Eaters” eats people and make them transform into one of the Sin Eaters. So the Warrior of Light and the Seventh Dawn heard that the people living there were uncomfortable about the Sin Eaters and wanted the darkness so we visited each state of the dream world and beated up the strongest or the leader Sin Eaters that were living in each areas. While doing so, we met Vauthry, an extremely fat Sumo Wrestler who is a king of Sin Eaters living in a richly and fancy place named Eulmore, but he kinda always hits the ground very hard when he’s mad or upset. Dude, can you just stop hitting the ground? I feel bad for the ground. I’m an HSP so please stop doing those painful or hurtful stuffs. Also, if you wanna hit something, go and hit the worst person I’ve ever met in my whole life naked please? I’m begging you and everyone living in Eulmore is begging you to do so. We can’t sleep too. Just too noisy. So yeah, we met him and we also met an extremely eccentric Ascian named Emet Selch, a friend of Ardyn FF15 who wanted to connect the Dream World and the real world together so we stopped him. After we did, he died but like Aldbert, his spirit joined us and became our companion and he helped us fight against Elidibus, a FF3 player that brings back the light and also the most powerful Ascian before going to Endwalker.
Endwalker
Endwalker has 2 stories but becomes one around from level 83. So from level 80 to 83 is most basically we found a strange tower in every state in Eorzea, manipulating people like a disease and Fandinel was the one who did this so at level 80, we were able to choose to go on a hunting mission to Thaniver or stay at Old Sharlyan and learned about the Final Days but we weren’t able to learn a clue about it. We only learned that Hydelen was the good god and Zodiark as the bad god. So In Thaniver, we learned about the Mangus Sisters and we entered the Tower of Zot, defeat the Mangus Sisters and helped the people stuck in the tower. We successfully did. At level 82, we visited Garemald, a dark, evil and cold state and that state had the main tower which is causing people to be brainwashed or manipulated. While investigating there, we met Zenos (Rival) and Fandinel (Arch Enemy) and Zenos transferred his soul to our characters skin and that was no good at all. We struggled with that imperial suit. That was a hard challenge. After that, we successfully captured Zenos, stopped his attack and at level 83, we entered the Tower Of Babil and killed Anima (The one causing the brainwash). After doing so, Fadniel and Zenos escaped to the Moon so we chased the 2. After getting to the moon, Fandinel took his soul and transformed into Zodiark and we defeated it but this caused more big trouble. So after killing it, the final days began in the Earth but before that, we found cute rabbits living in the Beastways Burrow, the rabbits working to make a new environment in case if we failed to manage the final days. Coming back to Earth, we met this nightmare with bloody burning skies and people turning into monsters by negative emotions. So we tried our best to control the Final days. From level 86, the player goes back to the Crystarium, meets Ryne and the soul of Elidibus, and going to the far past land Elpis. Once we got there, we met tons of young Ancients such as Emet Selch and Venat. So we also met Meteion and Hermes, the 2 were so kind and friendly but Meteion has lots of sisters, so around level 87 quest, we got the results of Meteion’s Sisters but all turned out dead or missing and Meteion turned arrogant, vengeful, depressed, and destroying hope about the world and turning to being one of the major villains of the game. Hermes was too kind and trying to make Meteion more emotional but that turned even worse and that’s the reason why the final days begun. Meteion’s negative emotions. After coming back to the present, we went back to Old Sharlyan, and started to build a huge airship to the Ultima Thule. We called the whole Eorzea alliance to get as much Ether so we can build a huge and fast airship. There were few quests with that cute rabbits from the Moon and that was quite hard to deal with. After we got to the Ultima Thule, we were confused and searched a way to open a way to Meteion but this was quite sad. So our friends had to sacrifice their lives to make a road. What they will sacrifice for is that is we had to find the character who is nihilistic. So there were the dragons, Ea’s, and the Omicrons. The dragons and Ea’s were all nihilistic so it was hard to find the biggest nihilistic but for the omicrons, it was so hard to find. So for the dragons, it’s about they gave up because their world is having a big war, Ea’s were saying that Knowledges are wastes, and Omicrons were saying they are preparing for the war. After we opened all the path by sacrificing your friends, Emet and his friend appeared and returned everyone back to life. After that we defeated Meteion with one, and we talked to Meteion at the edge of the Universe. Meteion finally broke her negative feelings and she casted out her new beginning. Full of energy and enthusiasm, Meteion flew and find a switch where the player could go back to the airship but before that, we had our duel with our best friend Zenos. Zenos was full of enthusiasm and excitement for our final duel in Endwalker. After we defeated Zenos, Zenos became disappointed and depressed that he lost again and saying his last words before he is fully gone. The Seventh Dawn came back, everyone was so happy and that’s the end for Endwalker.
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For context.
I saw this rave event popping out of nowhere on a facebook group, and decided to check it out. It was a "post apocalyptic" themed rave. I thought it looked cool, there were videos of their previous events, the organisator of the event building stuff for the rave, like a giant snake head shooting laser beams and such. The event looked pretty convincing overall.
But I was wrong.
It was all a scam. First, we arrived there, the music was horrible. They promised techno, psytrance, downtempo, deep house. None of that was present, the only thing we had was house and dubstep.
The decors were horrible, it was all made out of unpainted cardboard and it looked like a school art project.
Before we go in, they were checking our bags. Which really ringed a bell, because I've went to a lot of rave, and not a single one was checking my bag. I've never seen that.
The lasers were not programmed to follow the beat of the songs, it was basically a 50 bucks laser machine off aliexpress, which stopped working after 3 - 4 hours, so there were no lasers anymore.
There were like 5 - 6 guys at the dj table, they were filming the crowds and each others instead of "mixing".
Heck, they were not even mixing anything, they just shoved a usb card inside a laptop and ran an AI generated song on loop.
The party was getting really really really boring, even substances couldn't help me to enjoy my time. At one point I asked the guy who made the event on facebook where was the techno, later on he blocked me.
Anyways, this whole thing was sketchy. I should've known it was a scam. Live and learn I guess.

Personal opinion on a frequent topic of discussion, would love to hear your thoughts!
1) They aren’t tradable
2) The Greater Affix system:
Yes GAs are a nice to have not a need to have but the chase is no longer for a piece of gear… now once you have the piece it’s not “good enough” until you find a full GA piece
I’ve played quite a bit this season, beat Lilith, all tormented bosses, still need to beat pit 100+ (think I can just haven’t tried past 94 yet) and have yet to find a normal unique with more than 1 GA and I’ve found ALOT of uniques. I’m not even using a legendary with more than 2 GA and I’ve only found 2 dual GAs that have been usable that I didn’t brick.
3) Resplendent spark system:
At this point it is really only useful for your first Uber from the 3 you can get on 1 account and then 4th from leveling an alts wolf’s honor. (Unless you’re one of the chosen lucky ones or you want to level that many alts… also it’s kind of poor game design knowing it may be quicker to lvl 4 additional alts for 4 more sparks then to grind bosses and hope you get lucky)
4) Ubers aren’t game breaking:
They can help but I feel fairly confident that if everyone got 3 Uber uniques of their choice right now, PIT 200 still wouldn’t be cleared by the end of the next few weeks…. Let alone 150
5) They would still be chase items:
But would break up the monotony of trashing thousands of legendaries and hundreds of uniques, and even the Ubers you get would still provide that chase due to the GA system, and it at least allows you to find enough to do a few resplendent spark turn ins a season.
I mean… seriously… I’m still looking for a GA version of my normal uniques I use
6) Just like uniques not all Ubers are good for every build
In Closing:
To all of you self loathing nay sayers out there that want to exclaim how “we just want everything given to us immediately without having to work for it” or “I’ve gone 4 seasons and the launch without seeing an Uber and I love it like this” or “Ubers is what keeps the game alive” here is my counter… on top of my above remarks:

• ran some durials with my friend earlier today, he got his first Uber unique to drop, didn’t even know it was an Uber cause the game has no visual difference on the ground or inventory, checks his inventory and goes “Whats Anduriels Visage?” Im like “sick! Nice job dude you got an Uber!” His response “cool… I guess?” then followed by “wanna play a different game for a bit?” That’s how little excitement Ubers bring people because of how they appear and because of the actual impact they have.
  
• The lack of drops may make the more “hardcore” audience stay engaged longer (but let’s face it they would play regardless) but without a little bite of the carrot dangling in front of your face from time to time people will stop chasing, I’m about to be in that boat. I’ve completed everything I wanted to this season, got my Uber from turn in, grinded a ton of bosses with nothing to show, ran a lot of pit, I feel content, I’m ok stopping now and coming back next season, BUT I know I’d play longer if I didn’t just run 60 Gregoires and Varshans to get a bunch of below 925 gear and subsequent durials with nothing to show. If I got an Uber or 2 out of all those runs, or from the hundreds of pits, helltides, helltides chests, and NMDs, the possibility of marginal improvements to my gear would keep me going. The ability to feel like if I grinded enough to try a few extra shako spark turn ins from salvaged Ubers would keep me motivated.
  

Yes, increased Uber drops is not the full solution they need a re-work, but I firmly believe it would increase the longevity of a season for a large amount of players. I understand that some people are concerned making it too accessible which makes them to common and less exciting, but are they really exciting now? And would they truly become less exciting? Pretty sure the GA system would amplify it.
I know that was just my personal thoughts and I am probably an outlyer, but overall I LOVED this season, I think a few more tweaks to the pit rewards, Ubers, and the boss laddeitem level of normal boss loot and the ability to re-summon without leaving dungeon and resetting, and the game will be in a REAL good spot. 👍 good luck there yall!

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Notes/Leaders/Etc:

• Yesterday’s game: The Astros beat the Twins 5-2
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Today's game will be: St. Louis Cardinals (27-29) @ Philadelphia Phillies (41-18) at74:10 PM ET.
MLB.com preview, and analysis
The probable starting pitchers are:
Lance Lynn (2-3, 3.45 ERA 53K) vs ** Taijuan Walker (3-1, 5.51 ERA 25K)**
Submit your picks in the automated system above, and good luck!
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Chicago White Sox have the least amount of games with 1.
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Sunday Night Lucky Guess Question:

As suggested by RangerLover92
How many pitches will be thrown in the 6th inning?
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Inebriated Conversations

After eight long and grueling hours, we began our rapid descent from the heavens. I never really got the: “did it hurt when you fell from heaven” pickup line until we hit the tarmac. The force of the impact nearly knocked my head into the seat in front of me, so fuck yeah, it hurt when I fell from heaven. I’d imagine even Lucifer himself had a softer landing than we did. He also didn’t have to endure the stomach churning and nauseating food that was served on the plane, but I digress, at least we had finally reached our destination. A land not so far away that only varied in appearance, but the truth was this mystical and magical land, deep down, was no different from the place I grew up or attend college. As I waited in purgatory, the security line, I began wondering if I was dreaming. Was I really in London or even a different country for that matter? The line, which seemed so much longer than the European and the U.K., line was filled with fellow Americans. Perhaps they are still acrimonious about us beating them in the Revolutionary War, so they decided that this was ample punishment for our victory. Whatever the case, we finally made it through security, then collected our bags. I saw my relatively new bag with the bowtie on the handle and was relieved that it had not been lost or left in the United States. We met our tour guide, Emma, who at first glance seemed to be very different. She had an unusual hair cut that was much shorter than ones most woman her age would have, but I soon learned that her appearance, much like London’s, would not be any indication of what lies beyond. When we finally escaped from limbo, the airport, we were put on a coach bus, and taken to our hotel. I was exhausted and in need of a shower, but all I could do was drop my luggage off, then swiftly return to the lobby. As we stood outside in the crisp, refreshing air, we were handed our subway passes, or as they say, “tube passes.” We followed our guide, Emma, on a short walk to the underground. When our group finally descended the stairs and made our way to the map, a map Virgil couldn’t even navigate, we began our journey that involved the same punishment as those afforded to people in the eighth level of hell. We walked endlessly, 10.6 miles, and viewed the most popular tourist attractions London had to offer. I was surrounded by beautiful statues, fantastic architecture, and attractive people whose dialect could captivate almost anyone. At first, like everyone else, I was completely and utterly captivated by it all, because it was a completely different world. Our group finished the day with a mile and a half walk to the Globe Theatre, where we saw Shakespeare’s play, Comedy of Errors. My fellow students and I stood, as our professors sat comfortably watching the play. During the production, all I could think about was my numb legs and my aching feet. I tried drowning the pain with a few glasses of overly priced and nasty wines, but my attempt was to no avail. For once in my life, I knew what it was like to experience actual physical agony, not just the tedious and never-ending emotional kind. It wasn’t the lake of fire or some frozen wasteland, but that shit was still excruciating. After the play, we struggled to find a new passageway to the hot and crowded underworld, the tube, but luckily, I had service on my phone, so we found it. We finally made it back to the hotel around eleven in the evening. After a long day of flying and an excess of walking, I had never been as excited as I was to climb into a bed that was, quite frankly, too small for my six-foot-five physique. To anyone reading this, don’t worry, I’m not planning on giving a day to day synopsis of what I saw while I was abroad, because the sights aren’t what truly matter. I mean, I could just rant about Buckingham Palace and its beauty, Windsor Castle and its enormous layout, the Tower of London and its history, the Natural History Museum and its priceless artifacts, Stratford upon Avon and Shakespeare’s life, Oxford and it’s impressive library, Cornwall and its tranquil beaches, the Minack Theatre and its sublimity, or the Ashmolean Museum and its Jeff Koons exhibition, but that shit has no genuine meaning to it. I’m not going to waste your time by writing about some tourist sites that you could see in almost any travel magazine about the U.K., so if that’s what you are looking for stop reading. I suggest you pick up a travel magazine and read it until you are content, but if you want to read something real, then I suggest you continue. The reality is, the things I’ll take from this trip are the inebriated conversations I had with others. I not only gave these people advice about their lives; I learned something new about my own. I, ***** *******, am the Barstool Prophet, who descended from the heavens prepared to spout wisdom and retardation. Before I divulge the serious and deep conversations I experienced abroad, I want to let you know that the other person and I were under the influence of alcohol. I know what you are thinking, but alcohol has been a part of human culture since 7,000 B.C.; to put that into perspective, man invented alcohol before the wheel. From what I've seen in my lifetime some people drink to forget, some drink to remember, some drink to punish themselves, and some drink to converse with others. I fall into the latter category, but while I was in the U.K., I encountered people whose purpose for drinking was similar to mine as well as people that would fall in the other categories. I never really got the saying, "It's better to be a glass half full person, than a glass half empty person." I get the whole positivity aspect of the saying; however, I'd trust a "glass half empty person" far more, because they'd just order another drink. I am in no way trying to promote alcoholism; in reality, I am just trying to explain how alcohol can fuel an in-depth conversation. The Latin proverb "In Vino Veritas" states that "In Wine there is Truth"; wiser words have never been spoken. Alcohol allows people to speak their hidden thoughts and desires, especially to a stranger like me. 

Emma

As I stated earlier, Emma was our tour guide, who sported a relatively short and somewhat masculine haircut. Luckily, I had consumed enough alcohol at the time of her arrival to ask her why she chose that specific style. After giving me a vague: “because I like it” response, she clutched her glass of wine and forced it down. We talked about her occupation and how lonely traveling could get, but she seemed like she was familiar with the feeling of loneliness. She asked me what I wanted to do when I grew up, and I said, “I want to be a lawyer.” Emma slammed her glass down and began to laugh hysterically; she said, “Seriously?” I found her response quite peculiar until she revealed that her ex-husband was a lawyer. He was devoted to his job and always worked long hours, which did not bother her, at first. I surmise that his lack of interest in her is what led to their separation. After a long moment of silence, I gulped my drink down and gained the courage to ask: “do you think the relationship you had with him prepared you for this job?” She paused and began to think intently. She took a sip of her wine, laughed, and said, “I guess so, that’s one positive thing I got out of the relationship.” The chat continued with talk of food, politics, weather, and other small-talk topics, but then we somehow made it back to her haircut. Emma told me that she was bi-sexual, which, despite the tell-tell signs in her appearance, isn’t something she shares with most people. I told her that homophobia and racism is a major part of the culture that I grew up in, which surprised her. She couldn’t comprehend how someone with that upbringing could be so openminded. I responded with one word and one word only, “Self-Awareness.” I came to the realization that in life people are consciously and unconsciously molded by those around them, but at the end of the day, it is their choice to decide who they are and what they believe. Emma’s marriage may not have been picture perfect, but she was still able to take something positive from it. As much as we don’t want to admit it, even the worst of our relationships impact us in a positive way. 

Phillip Goldsmith

Before I get into this incredibly intense and somewhat depressing story, I’d like to describe its setting. I was sitting on a red velvet couch, drinking Jack Daniels Honey in a tall glass with one ice cube. I know what you are thinking, but I was not in a strip club. Our hotel’s game room/ bar area looked like an American strip club, not that I’ve ever been in one. Like seriously, if a few poles and dancers were added, I’d feel like I was at the Red Carpet, which is a strip club near where I live, but again, I may or may not have been there. I had finished half my bottle when Phil walked in, and I could immediately tell that he was hurting on the inside. Excluding dumbass frat guys, not very many people drink vodka straight out of the bottle with the intention of finishing it. He sat next to us, so I reached my hand out and said, “Hey man, what’s your name?” He said, “Hello, I am Phillip Goldsmith.” I responded as anyone would and said, “That’s a badass name!” We talked about life, love, and women as most guys do. We were both close to finishing our bottles when I noticed a tattoo on his arm that said, “Harry.” Who was this Harry? He certainly didn’t strike me as a Royalist, so I knew he didn’t just get the prince’s name on his arm for shits and giggles. I gulped down a few more sips of my drink and slowly placed it back down. I looked him in the eyes and said, “who is Harry?” His response shook every bone in my body to their core. After holding his tears back and ingesting some more of his vodka, Phil looked at me and said that “Harry was his son.” Was? He continued speaking, and I learned that Harry died three days after he was born. That tragic loss would result in a few other loses in his life, his wife, and his faith. Phil told me that he used to go to his grave on his birthday and Christmas, but he couldn’t do it anymore. He didn’t see a point in it any longer. Surprisingly I felt the urge to tell him that “God loved him and that he would see his son again.” I am in no way a prolific believer; I’d probably put myself in the wayward son category. However, something came over me, and I felt like I needed to tell him that. We had both finished our drinks, and as we were saying our goodbyes, he thanked me. I don’t know why, but he did. My encounter with Phil taught me that when you meet someone, you don’t know what they are going through, but through love and compassion, you can have a positive impact on them. 

Lexie

Lexie is a beautiful and intelligent young lady from Kansas City, Missouri. We met and chatted throughout the week because she was a part of our EF group. One night, after Lexie and I had more than our share of wine, we began to talk about our plans for the future. Before I tell this story, you must know, I have the unfortunate handicap of flirtation when I drink, but she was able to move past my impulsive outburst. I think my accidental comments about her beautiful eyes, stunning smile, and cute laugh allowed her to open up to me. Despite what you are thinking, I like to flirt because I enjoy making women smile, I don’t always do it for self-serving reasons. Anyways, as I said, we started discussing our plans for the future, but one can’t divulge their future in an inebriated state without discussing their past. I gave my whole spiel about wanting to be a prosecutor who would later become a congressman, then a Supreme Court or D.C. Circuit Court justice. She said, “Wow! That’s quite the plan. I want to go into Law as well.” I hastily responded by saying, “That’s sexy. I could see it.” We both laughed, but then she said, “I don’t know though, Law School is hard.” She didn’t strike me as a person who couldn’t handle a challenge, so I asked, “Why do you think you wouldn’t excel? You present yourself as someone who does.” She tried not to blush, then sipped her extremely sweet white wine. I know it was sweet because I made the unfortunate decision of trying it; it was so sweet that even a rock would get a hangover from it. Anyways, she started talking about high school and how people thought she was unintelligent. I laughed and thought about how I experienced that very same thing. I said, “Fuck that, screw them. God, high school girls are mean. Do you actually believe that crap?” She giggled and said, “Of course not, but it’s still in the back of my head.” I grabbed another beer from Raj, the bartender at the hotel. Yes, we were on a first name basis; did you expect anything less from the barstool profit? I sat back down and leaned in, intent on getting this point across to Lexie. I sipped my beer, ever so casually, and said, “Listen, we all remember the immature negatives of our high school existence, but this is now. At some point, we have to grow up into the people we want to be, not who everyone tells us to be.” She then asked, “Why are you so wise?” (You are probably thinking “sure she did,” but I swear that is what she said; I’m not a narcissist using creative license to praise myself.) I accredited it to my amazing parents as well as the shitty ex-girlfriends, situations, and friends I had experienced. We continued talking about a lot of random things like abortion, racism in America, and other pseudo-political topics. It was 3 am. when we finally decided it was time to go to bed. I hugged her and told her to use those negative voices as motivation. Again, I was thanked for the conversation, which, at this point, seems to be a normal thing for strangers to do. My conversation with Lexie made me realize that, when we travel, the baggage we carry isn’t only the physical kind. That tedious and deep emotional baggage also comes along for the journey. Most people, who travel somewhere, will lose a physical part of their baggage, like a sock, shirt, or something of that nature. Lexie did something most could not and do not, she left a piece of her emotional baggage, the night I spoke to her in the bar. 

Szymon

Szymon was in the bar area when I got to the hotel. He had a very interesting accent, which was far different from the ones I had heard that week, so I asked, “Where are you from?” He said, in a relatively drunken manner, “I am from Poland. You’re from America, aren’t you.” I responded with a firm: “Yes.” The conversation proceeded with small talk, but as I had a few more beers, the topics shifted to more serious topics. I was recently in a Holocaust history class, so of course, the first serious thing I asked was if he had been to Warsaw to see the Concentration Camps. He paused in silence, so I said, “Talk about hell on Earth, the holocaust was some fucked up shit.” After saying that he seemed to gain the courage to tell me that he was Jewish. He told me about the things his parents endured as children and how his grandfather had died in a concentration camp. He told me how he had rejected his faith after hearing these horrible stories. He said to me, “What could faith do for someone. The Jews have been persecuted countless times for it.” I understood where he was coming from, but at the same time, I didn’t. He had real reasons for his existential doubt, and I truly could not say the same. I got a shot of vodka from Raj; threw it back, and said, “Our faith shapes our decisions in life, even if we tell ourselves it doesn’t.” He sat pondering my words, but he seemed bored of the discussions about faith. I quickly changed the subject and asked him, “Why are you in London?” I learned that he travels all over continental Europe cleaning asbestos out of old buildings. I responded as any young person would and said, “that’s cool. I’d love to travel all over Europe.” He said, “it might be for a young single guy, but I hardly see my kids. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if my wife cheated on me.” I couldn’t believe he would say something that personal, but then again, that’s what alcohol does. I suggested that he quit the job and find one closer to home. He laughed and said, “Ugh… you sound like my wife right now.” I bought him another beer and said, “maybe you should listen to her.” He looked at me and said, “maybe you are right ha-ha.” My conversation with Szymon taught me that it doesn’t matter how much money you make or how many places you get to travel on the company’s dime. What matters in life is family and the ones you love. By the time we stopped talking, I could hardly understand him, but he shook my hand and said, “have fun in London.” I laughed and said, “I will, call your wife tonight and tell her you love her.” He smiled and nodded, assuring me he would. It was time to leave, so I packed my things and got ready to go to the airport. I finally boarded my fiery chariot that would bring me back to the heavens. I forced down a few shots of Jack Daniels, closed my eyes, and wondered if the Barstool Prophet would have a second coming. Would I ever return to this amazing city and spout words of wisdom and retardation? Would I ever drink two whole liters of cider and wake up with a black eye? Well, that one is a definite no, but so many questions are left unanswered. Did I actually impact those that I talked to? Did they even remember the conversation? As much as I want to believe I did, I’ll never know. We don’t know what this life holds or what our encounters with strangers will yield; all we can do is give it our best shot and live like we are dying… (Que inspiring music). 

Let me know if the foundation of this sardonic and surface level literature reference writing has potential… first ever post!

Logan the bounty hunter was in a really bad mood.
It all started when the coffee machine stopped working. This wasn’t a rare occurrence; in fact, it was the third time this cycle, but this time his go-to solution (taking out and reinserting the star powder battery) didn’t fix it, and he was all out of ideas.
It’s not that the caffeine even did anything for him. The nanomachines in his system filtered out many sorts of potentially addictive or harmful substances, and for some reason this included caffeine, which is a fact he only realized after the seven-cycle refund period had passed.
Still, it was an old habit and an act of comfort that he sorely felt the absence of.
That was the first thing. The second thing was that his tracker had stopped working. In fact, his entire connection to the galactic wide web (gww) had gone down. Without the tracker, he couldn’t pinpoint the exact location of his current bounty—a low-class deathworlder wanted for kidnapping and trafficking—which kind of made his whole bounty hunting business difficult to do.
Oh, and his ship had crashed.
Damn thing was overdue for maintenance, and the autopilot had started malfunctioning while flying over a small dusty-brown planet. It had taken some careful manual maneuvering and some buffeting about in the planet’s whirlwind atmosphere, but eventually he had managed the miracle of walking away from a smoking and unsalvageable wreckage with only minor cuts and bruises.
Here he was now, trudging through the sandy windswept dunes of a planet that hadn’t even showed up on the map. Armed with little more than a spacesuit, a blaster, and an undying will. And wishing he’d had that cup of coffee (and wasn’t immune to caffeine).
Logan raised a hand to his eyes, peering through the thick glass of his visor. There was so much dust and sand swirling around that it made it quite hard to see where he was going, not that there were any landmarks in sight anyway. It looked scorching hot outside, though his spacesuit registered a cool 286 Kelvin for some reason. Likely another malfunction, one that he’d rather not put to the test.
On a planet like this, he supposed, everyone (if anyone was even here) probably lived under the surface where it was probably cooler and probably free from sandstorms. All he had to do was find the entrance to their underground tunnels among all this shifting sand.
The chance of that happening was, unfortunately, not very high. Still, Logan wasn’t panicking yet; he’d been through worse, he thought. He’d been through jungles teeming with 8-foot beetles. Survived massive hiveminds circling to entrap him, faced slippery slimes that reformed their bodies to resemble those he held dearest. Horrible learning experiences, those.
That being said, sometimes it’s the mundane problems that pose the greatest threats of all. Starvation, aching thirst, and a dwindling oxygen supply while wandering a barren desert. It wouldn’t be a glamorous way to go out, and Logan was wracking his brain for ideas.
Now would’ve been a good time to use his rescue beacon, if he had one. This would be his, what, 127th bounty? And until now, he’d never had to use a beacon. Stopped carrying one a dozen bounties ago. Maybe it was just luck, but things had always gone pretty smoothly, and maybe he’d gotten a little overconfident.
Logan knelt down and grasped at the ground, watching the little grains of sand sift through his gloved fingers. Those little specks seemed to shimmer and flicker, like a low quality hologram call. Otherwise, though, they seemed normal; surprisingly similar to the sand he remembered from Earth. It made sense that some things remained the same throughout the universe; it’s not like every planet could re-invent the periodic table, after all. Even aliens had to remain grounded in reality, however loosely.
He looked down. According to his suit’s display, he had a few hours of oxygen left. He’d been walking for a while now with nothing but the sands to show for it. He also had to pee. It was really going quite terribly.
“It looks like you’re doing quite terribly,” a voice said, velvety and welcoming. Logan jerked his head up, blinking rapidly in surprise.
Standing before him, with crossed arms and a smoldering look, was a lithe, dusky-furred humanoid. They—or she, judging by the feminine face—was wearing a long, thin shawl translucent enough to reveal a pair of twitching, swiveling ears and a questioningly arced tail, swaying in the wind.
The feline features were unmistakable. It was, by all accounts, a catgirl.
Mentally, Logan pumped his arm and jumped for joy. Just wait until the guys back at Earth heard about this! Many a novice pilot first set out for the stars with dreams of catgirls and other alien babes in mind, but thus far, most alien species had been decidedly strange and eerily-shaped, though this didn’t stop everyone from pursuing them. Outwardly, though, he nodded, and rasped, “I could use some help. Do you know about this thing called ‘oxygen’?”
The catgirl frowned. “Great way to say hi to a girl. But yes, you aren’t the first traveler to crash-land on Shaw Prime. Follow me.”
“Oh, great,” Logan said. How convenient. “Where to?”
“My people live underground, hidden from the elements within a complex system of—”
“Tunnels? I knew it.”
The catgirl turned around and whipped her tail against Logan’s leg. It kind of stung for a moment. “I don’t know what culture you come from, traveler, but in mine, it’s rude to interrupt someone while they’re speaking. Especially if they’re the host and you, the guest.”
Logan rubbed the back of his head (or tried to, but the spacesuit got in the way). “Sorry. Just got excited. Interrupting someone speaking is actually considered rude in my culture, too.”
“So you should’ve known better.” The catgirl harrumphed and started marching forward, waving her tail to signal him to follow. He shrugged and started trudging along behind her.
“So where am I, exactly? ‘Shoe Prime’ you said earlier, I think?”
“Shaw Prime,” she corrected. “A small sand planet on the outermost reaches of the nearest solar system. Quite uninhabitable for most, and all our visitors arrive unwillingly.”
“I see. It certainly feels inhospitable. And,” Logan said, jumping in place a couple times, “you’ve got decently strong gravity, though less than where I come from. You know, this feels like at least a minor deathworld to me.”
“The term ‘deathworld’ is new to me, but it does seem fitting enough.”
“Right. I’m guessing the Galactic Federation hasn’t gotten around to marking your planet yet. Actually, your planet didn’t even show up on my map; people might not even know that civilization exists here. Huh.” It would be the first time for Logan to discover a new species. He could report this back home, and hopefully get handsomely rewarded for it.
“The ‘Galactic Federation’? I haven’t heard that term before. What does it mean?”
“That’s the big alliance formed by all the space-faring species of the known universe. They’re basically responsible for everything, including first official contact with new species like yours.” Logan paused a moment. “Wait, you said I’m not the first traveler to land here, right? How have you not heard of the Galactic Federation before?”
The catgirl’s ears twitched, but she didn’t look back. “They must have neglected to mention it.”
“Weird. Surely someone must’ve mentioned it. The Federation’s got these rules for first contact, see, and—”
“We’re almost there.” The catgirl interrupted, glancing back at him with those smoky eyes. “The hidden entrance to the tunnels lies just ahead.”
Logan peered through his visor. Ahead of his guide’s slim figure, he saw nothing but more of the same brown hues. A sudden uneasiness prickled his skin. “Where? I don’t see anything.”
“If you could see it, it wouldn’t be very hidden, would it? Come on.”
She beckoned him forward, and a few paces later, stopped entirely. She crouched down and scrabbled at the sand a few times, revealing a circular wooden hatch buried under a thin layer of sand. It didn’t look that heavy, but she grunted and strained to lift it up with her paws, revealing a dark cavern down inside.
“In you go,” she said, pointing her tail at the hole.
Something about this didn’t sit right with Logan. Maybe it was the way her fur stood warily on end, the way her ears shivered every so often. Maybe it was the fact that his guide didn’t know about the Galactic Federation, yet seemed familiar enough with travelers to communicate with ease. Sure his universal translator helped, but that was only supposed to work with discovered species, not ones that had yet to be contacted and researched. Or maybe it was just that he didn’t like jumping into suspiciously dark holes in the ground.
There was also the fact that the temperature gauge in his suit was now measuring a chilly 270 Kelvin. A far cry from the heat suggested by the sun-baked sands he saw.
He had a guess where this was going, and he didn’t like it, not one bit.
“Say,” he said, conversationally. “I noticed your hologram flickering earlier. Think you need some maintenance.”
“What?” The catgirl said, raising a dusky eyebrow. “I don’t know what that is. Won’t you go inside?”
“I’m just saying. It’s a convincing show and all, promise, but once you’ve been in the biz long enough, you start noticing small details like flickering sand and mismatched temps.”
“Look at you. All the heat must’ve gone to your head.” She said, sidling up to him. There was a sudden yet subtle shift in her demeanor, so quick that he almost didn’t notice. Her eyes lowered, her tongue darted out to lick her nose, and she placed one foot in front of the other gracefully, retracing her own steps perfectly. She approached him, casually curling her tail around his leg, sending tingles up his spine.
“Poor, weary traveler. It must’ve been tough, sailing through space all on your own. Won’t you come inside and rest a while?” She purred, tugging him gently towards the open hatch. “Quickly, before the sand covers it again.”
He inched a hand towards the blaster hanging at his side, unmoved by the obvious act. “Does the word ‘gelatinous’ mean anything to you?”
Her eyes locked onto his hand, her tail going stiff behind her. “Not as such, no. Why don’t we discuss this inside? After you, of course.”
“Of course. I’ll be on my way, then.”
Logan said, shoving her away, leaping back, and unholstering his blaster, all in one practiced motion. She landed softly on all fours, hissed, then sprang at him, fast as lightning. He raised an arm to block, pulling up his blaster and aiming it at her center mass. At the same time, she skidded to an abrupt halt before him, half-crouching as one hand darted past his arm without a sound.
They both froze. Logan’s blaster trained on her torso, her claws nearly piercing his neck. It seemed they were at a deadlock.
Wait, Logan thought to himself. I have a spacesuit.
His fingers itched on the trigger, but in that same instant, he heard a small tearing sound as a single claw slipped through several layers of synthetic polymers, Kevlar, and silica fiber to rest itself pointedly against the actual skin of his neck. A small hissing sound indicated the oxygen leaking from the new hole in his suit.
“That’’s a sharp knife you’ve got.” He said, feeling his mouth drying up.
“It’s not a knife,” she said smugly, though her raised fur betrayed her wariness.
“Enough of these illusions, okay? I’ve seen through ‘em. We’re not in a desert, and you’re not a catgirl. I’ve met your kind before—shape-shifting, amorphous slimes, always taking the form of something I love. Usually it’s my late wife or a dear friend, but pretending to be a catgirl is taking it too far.” He sniffed.
She hmphed, and said, “You’re only half-right, outworlder.” She let out a trilling sound, and a moment later, the world flickered out of existence.
With the veil lifted, Logan could see the world for what it really was. Gone were the tan-brown desert and the shifting sands. In their place was a world of ash. White and grey specks drifted through a sunless sky, cold and desolate. Looking down, he saw that his feet were buried ankle-deep in the stuff. So the feeling of sand had been real, sort of. He wondered what it was made of.
Dreading what he would see, he raised his eyes once more, only to see the same catgirl shivering in her shawl before him.
“This is what I actually look like,” she said, pricking her claw against his neck. “Now how about dropping that gun and sticking your hands in the air?”
“So catgirls are real.” Logan wondered aloud, feeling hope swelling in his chest.
“I… guess?” She seemed uneasy about the way he looked at her. “So about that gun—"
“What is this place?” He asked, prodding his blaster against her stomach. “I’m pretty sure it looked like a desert world from outside. Don’t tell me you have some, some kind of planet-wide hologram going on. That would be… I don’t know, prohibitively expensive, and very concerning.”
“Yes,” she said, straight-faced. “The hologram covers the whole solar system, in fact. We are at the center of a powerful criminal empire spanning the galaxy. The white ash is made from cremating the corpses of all who have dared to oppose us, and soon you will join their ranks.”
“Woah, really?” Logan said, raising an eyebrow. They must deal in trafficking, then.
“No, I lied. Although, usually that gets a bigger reaction out of outworlders. Now come on, you can surrender now or wait until my backup gets here, and then it’ll get messy. You choose.”
“I think I’ll wait for more catgirls to show up, thanks.”
She hissed. “It’s your lucky day. Here they are now, actually.”
From behind mountains of ash, they plodded forwards. All varieties of colors, from dusky to snow-white to calico, but all sporting the same unmistakable ears and tails. Logan’s heart beat with excitement, until he noticed the strange metal tubes being pointed at him from all angles.
“Ah, am I correct in assuming that those are your planet’s version of blasters?”
The catgirl retracted her claw from his neck and nodded in confirmation. “They’ll blast a big hole right through you.” She stretched her arms and yawned wide, letting herself relax now that her reinforcements were here.
Logan dropped the blaster to his side. “Well, shit.” Surrounded by armed enemies on all sides, he had no choice but to obey.
It was then that he had a really stupid idea. One that would probably get him killed, but which would be really funny if it worked.
His blaster had a laser scope that shined a visible red dot on his target when toggled on. An attached laser pointer, in other words. If these catgirls were anything like the felines he knew on Earth…
Hell, it was worth a shot.
[To be continued? Or maybe not. I didn’t know how to end this, and I felt pretty silly writing it :c]

I am NOT The OOP is u/RAkindoflosthere
Planning to ghost him after finding out he’s cheating on me
Originally posted to Infidelity confessions rant self
TRIGGER WARNING: infidelity, property damage, emotional manipulation, mentions of sexual assault
Planning to ghost him after finding out he’s cheating on me March 4, 2022
Found out my boyfriend was cheating a few weeks ago. Been spiraling since. Literally only running off of vengeance and pure disgust.
I got this weird gut feeling and checked his phone while he was asleep. Those 20 minutes locked in the bathroom felt like years, and the shame keeps me from talking to anyone about it. I moved across the country to be with him, so I’m all alone. No friends or family here.
He woke me up the next morning with kisses and breakfast and has been doing so a lot, lately. Probably the guilt.
He even bought me flowers for the first time ever. After me hinting at wanting them for years.
He thought my quiet crying was out of happiness. He even brought up buying a house for us, something with enough space for potential future children.
I’m still going through the motions. Making his breakfast and protein shake everyday, packing his lunch, making sure dinner is almost ready when he comes home from the gym.
What makes me the angriest is that I really, genuinely thought he wouldn’t do something like this. He watched his father cheat on his mother and father children out of their marriage, all while she struggled with infertility her entire life (my partner isn’t her biological son) and never had her own. She dedicated her life to the two of them and passed away of ovarian cancer shortly before we met.
Sometimes I think about whether she regretted staying with her husband or not. We have a small shrine in her honor and something makes me look at and expect guidance. I love the man she raised and hate the one her husband did. But they’re both him, and he’s a grown ass man more than capable of self control, so I decided to walk away.
Next week my car will be picked up and shipped back home, and I got first class tickets for me and my dog on his dime. He’ll come back home from work and everything I brought will be gone, along with me.
The only thing I think I might regret is not somehow being able to see his reaction when he walks through the door and realizes what’s going, lol.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
Future_Ad8467

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's the hardest thing to let go. As hopeless as it can feel sometimes, it does get better. Take your time in the beginning, but I think it's therapeutic to confront him, eventually. Ghosting doesn't provide closure for you. In my experience, confronting the problem, head on, gave me a sense of closure. I try to take everything that happens as a life lesson. Good luck with everything

OOP

I personally don’t believe in closure. I got all that I needed when I realized he was untrustworthy

~
Odd_One_9972

Do you have access to his phone/computer? Install a keylogger, then you can not only see what he's saying to you, but to the other APs as well. I put a keylogger on my ex's phone/computer when I caught him cheating. He was such a dumbass, and seeing the shit he was saying, the lies he was spewing, made me grateful I dropped his ass.

OOP

I do, but I don’t think it would make a difference for me. His entire “relationships” with the APs was lies.

Everything from his name, age, college degree, occupation, city, height, and dick size. He even told one he was married and his wife was pregnant with twins. I almost had a heart attack thinking I was an AP too and he had a family out there somewhere.

~
Suspicious_Bear_6634

If he can go after you, you should probably leave a note or a sign that you're leaving him because of his cheating. Seeing that you up and left without a known reason (from his pov) might push him to follow you home. If he knows the reason and knows that he has no chance in hell in getting you back, it might delay a possible confrontation.

OOP

you’re right. I’ve been considering just leaving a sticky note with a list of all the different girls names and the apartment key beside it. Simple and effective

Suspicious_Bear_6634

Fuck, multiple girls?? Draw a little middle finger beside them while you're at it. And make sure there are little to no supplies (food, toiletries, cleaning stuff) left and leave the house dirty so that he can appreciate how much you did for the asshole.

OOP

7 of them to be precise. I’ll have to rush and get out within a certain time frame but I might just settle for shrimp in the curtain rods. He’s really sensitive to smells lol

I lied to my boyfriend everyday and saved the money he gave me March 4, 2022
Almost every day my boyfriend sends me money for lunch, gas, something. I thought he was just really kind. Turns out he was cheating and giving me $$ made him feel less guilty, as though he didn’t beg me to move across the country with him where I know no one.
Once I found out I wanted to immediately confront him but was scared of the outcome since the apartment was only in his name and again, I know no one here.
Now I just save every dime of what he sends to be able to pay for the $3000 moving fees to go back home without hurting my own pocket too much.
Breaking my heart, destroying my ability to trust & scaring me off from men I can handle, but messing with my finances? Nah. never.
The transport company is coming next wednesday to take my car, and my plane tickets for me and my dog have been bought. Gonna keep up my happy act and do the usual cooking of dinner and scrubbing his back and poof on Wednesday like I never knew him. Its the only form of revenge I could do that wouldnt haunt me. Good riddance!

Edit: A few asked for details. There’s 7+ other women, everything he told them was a lie. Name, age, height, city, occupation. All of it.
The only common denominator was that he bought us all the exact same lingerie set for his birthday in January. 🙃 And specifically requested I hang it up in our closet where it’s viewable. Forgiveness is not on the table. He’ll be surprised, but I doubt he’ll be hurt.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
purejones

I look forward to it, how did you find out if it’s not too personal?

OOP

Woke up randomly in the middle of the night and “he’s up to no good” was all I could think about. I sleep like a literal baby and never, ever wake up like that. Took his phone and locked myself in the bathroom while he was asleep and found it all.

Friendship break ups are so much worse than relationship breakups March 5, 2022
I’ll be single again pretty soon and I’m looking forward to it but also not. Like yay! I finally can cook when/how I want to and don’t have to split chores and can do everything on my own my way.
But thats the only good part.
I’ve been on my own since I was 16 and I’ve turned out (mostly) fine, I have a paid off house and car, cute dog, debt free, and I’m finishing up my masters degree at 25. It could be worse.
But I’m lonely. I’m not on speaking terms with my family and had a huge fall out with my lifelong friends a couple years ago. I haven’t tried making friends since bc part of me hopes one day I can find a way to fix that friendship.
Plus I’m moving around so much that making friends is pointless. I’m not good at long distance anything.
I never prided myself on romantic relationships- sure, they’re cool, but a loving group of women was always where I found the most peace and understanding and that’s what I want the most.
I guess I’m just going through things right now and I really wish I had people I trust to talk to. Friend breakups hurt the most.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
OOP when asked how she had a house at a young age
OOP

Neither. I lived with my friends and their parents until college started. Already had a scholarship. Just worked 3 jobs until I was 22 and lived frugally.

~
Dufusbroth

The maths for time and money aren’t working out on this end but there is also a lot of variable/info that is missing.
It took my 7 years to payoff my house and I was contributing to it like it was an emergency. Qualifying for a home and paying it off in that amount of time without help seems nearly impossible. I’m so curious about the formula here! I need a lesson in finance from OP. When I broke it down on it just doesn’t seem possible except from a financial windfall counting even a frugal cost of living along with an accounting for taxes paid, etc… and that did not include the cost for transportation, medical, groceries, blah blah blah

OOP

The house was a 70k foreclosure and is 4bed/4bath. I was a golf caddy, gentlemen’s club bartender and occasional hostess, and notary signing agent. Along with selling stationary items on etsy. Also my scholarships paid for quite a bit of my home in general- they never specified what kind of housing for them, just housing. I lived in 1 room and rented out the other 3.

Dufusbroth

That’s the info I was looking for- thanks you! That is very smart. Good going! Good luck with your situation- so interested how he reacts to your departure

My current relationship has made me realize the thin line between love and hate. March 9, 2022
I found out my boyfriend of almost 4 years was cheating. We’ve lived together for 2 years and I’m leaving him tomorrow. He just doesn’t know yet. And won’t until after I’m gone.
As mad as I am, as betrayed as I feel, I still love him. All I really want is to wake up tomorrow and this all be a nightmare. I don’t enjoy this slice of reality.. that the person I loved the most has looked me in my eye and lied to me for who knows how long.
and every time I do it I’m left wondering how many times he did it. How many times did he wine, dine, and fuck other women and come home to me? How many times have I been the stupid girlfriend who trusted her boyfriend blindly? How many times have I been some woman’s laughing stock? Did he fuck us back to back? Did his friends know? Did they look me in my fucking eye and really not say anything? Did he love them? How many times did he tell me he loved me and meant it? When did he stop meaning it? Did he ever even mean it the first time?
I’m not a master manipulator. Unlike him. I’m just composed because I’ve never had any other choice. Emotions got you beat or worse when it came to my parents and I’m more than aware I have a shitload of trauma to unpack but I can’t.
Not in the self pity, woe is me, its too hard, but no. I probably just can’t. Therapists here are wildly westernized and once I start with the short list they’ll probably just charge me double. Maybe triple. And the last time I tried he kept trying to convince me I enjoyed my own assault.
Maybe I got cheated on because I’m emotionally inept. My intimacy levels are quite limited. The few times he asked about my childhood I either a) brushed him off or b) told him one thing I thought wasn’t that bad and he was so shocked I held out on the actually bad parts.
And that’s where the hate comes in. He knows what it’s like to grow up feeling unwanted. He knows what it’s like to lose your parents young. He knows what it’s like to feel like your entire life has been horrible event after horrible event.
But he still did this to me and I don’t get how he could. I could never cheat on anyone, let alone someone who’s shared such personal things with me.
I haven’t so much as made eye contact with another man since we met… other people were just other people and we were us.
I don’t know. I just don’t see being able to date again. I had deep seeded trust issues long before this and growing old by myself with 30 cats genuinely sounds nice. Hell, great even. At least I won’t always be wondering when the betrayal will come.

(Update) Leaving partner of 4 yrs after finding out he was cheating March 10, 2022
Transport company came and picked up my car. Sold whatever big furniture I brought for low prices. Took his dog to the park and played with him a bit, got him a dog cupcake and took him back to the apartment.
Movers started coming for the rest of my stuff and I hadn’t prepared for our property manager thinking we were both moving out and we hadn’t given them the required vacancy notice. She came to talk to me right as my uber was coming and I told her what was going.
Unfortunately they had already called him bc only his name on the lease. He’s called and texted me a few times but I haven’t replied. His work day won’t be over for a couple of more hours.
I left my apartment keys, and anything he’s ever bought for me that I hadn’t sold already. Didn’t feel like taking that stuff with me. While packing I remembered we bought a pet camera that shoots treats on the entertainment center and turned it back on. I promised myself I’ll disconnect from it by midnight tomorrow but I have my own predictions about how he’ll react and I just gotta know for sure. Yeah, it’s fucked up. Sue me lol
I actually forgot to leave a note and was running out of time before my uber came and just left the lingerie set he was so obsessed with on the bed. He’ll figure it out eventually. Or not.
I’m at the airport now with my dog and just waiting on my flight. I wish I could say that I feel free but I don’t. Just tired.
Thank you all for the well wishes and thank you more to all of the other women who reached out with similar stories. I think I might’ve caved and stayed if you all hadn’t.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
Suspicious_Bear_6634

What did he say on the text when they informed him that things were being moved out?

*OOP

Just that he got a call from property management and asked if I ordered something big and if anything was going on.

Pet Cam Update March 14, 2022
Update: I turned it on for about ten minutes after I got back to my home and unpacked. He wasn’t there, but everything was a mess. There was a hole in the wall, furniture flipped over, papers everywhere, the kitchen looked like a tornado went through it.
I deleted all of my other social media accounts but didn’t block his number. The first two days he called me over 200 times. Lots of novel ass text messages and him admitting to some shit I didn’t even know about yet. Quite a few calls from his dad and friends too.
I didn’t reply to any of them
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

PRESENT
This is Part 2 of 3, the Present, in game events we see! Onwards!
The Protagonist is some sort of content creator, one that goes to abandoned or forgotten places and "searches" them, as can be gleaned from the cameras facing the protagonist on his desk, and his conversation with a certain Laura, or LSparks53 (there's also an error in this Harmony tab, with one of the messages from Laura reading as from LauraSparks53 instead of LSparks53. Just a note). This Laura helps our protagonist, who goes by the username of eEnsign. His profile picture are the letters UF, which is weird, since it doesn't match the username, nor what Laura calls eEnsign: Ed. Anyways, I digress. From now on, I'll call the protagonist Ed as well. Laura helps Ed get footage of these places as per the conversation.
eEnsign: "Hey Laura! I'm doing another search this weekend! Wanna come with me?"
LSparks53: "The last few times I've gone with you SUCKED LMAO."
eEnsign: "Remember that old theme park we went to see as kids? Indigo Park?"
LSparks53: "yeah? I kind of forgot about that place? Been closed for a while, right? how would you even get in?"
eEnsign: "Honestly, I don't know. I'm not even gonna bring my equipment. Jump a fence of something? We've done worse lol”
LSparks53: "aight, well just be careful. I'm gonna pass on this one. if you can get in i'll go with you to help record some other time. i'm looking it up now and there's like NO info online about it. probably swarming with cops too."
eEnsign: "I guess we'll find out! I'll check it out, maybe we can go together next week?
Lsparks53: "just be careful, Ed. I don't want to be paying your bail."
And with that conversation, we learn that these two are like a dynamic duo of sorts, having some sort of channel or website where they post footage of places lost to time and "search" them, breaking laws of trespassing and such, apparently also having "done worse", whatever that means. Maybe they took a few things from the place, so burglary? It's never specified. Probably burglary, though, considering that Ed has taken to collecting all sorts of plushies and such from Indigo Park.
What I want to point out is how weird this Laura person acts. As soon as Indigo Park is mentioned, Laura instantly seems to dislike the idea, but never directly says it. Instead, she becomes reluctant to go with Ed, despite having done worse, as Ed puts it. Perhaps she's just cautious, and based on her last sentence, they haven't been caught before, or else she would have said "I don't want to be paying your bail again."
However, I don't think that's the case. Remember when Laura said she looked up Indigo Park and found nothing? Well, we know the website is still up and running, or at the very least, Ed used some sort of service like the Wayback Machine to pull it up on the right most monitor on his desk, which can be seen in the opening cutscene. On it, there's even an option to purchase tickets still, which is incredibly weird, which I'll also go into later on. Why would a defunct theme park need a still running website? After all, if you evacuate everyone from it with no explanation, wouldn't you want to get rid of all evidence of it? If not destroy the property outright, then at least take the website down. Again, digressing, the point is that Laura didn't find this website ... or she did, but didn't say anything.
Again, this is purely speculation at this point; I mean, the two of them have broke into a few places trespassing and recording and documenting abandoned places at least a few times for the internet, and maybe she really is just that cautious, worried about being imprisoned and charged for trespassing, and even attempted burglary.
And it seems like Ed is asking the same questions we are. Behind the Harmony tab is a notes tab with several questions such as "Why did it close?" and "What is left?", among a few others that are cut off. The next question seems to ask "Is it still" something. Seems like Ed and us are in the same boat. Hopefully we can help each other out.
Regardless, Ed ends up climbing the fence and enters the closed off Indigo Park, where dozens of crates stamped with the Indigo Park logo, along with trash, can be seen. Walking around, the main gates are closed off, and one of the doors seem to open on their own, allowing Ed entry into the Registration Center, a desk with a few monitors where a Rangler would sit and check Ed in.
Inside, the Rambley AI comes to life, noting that Ed is the first person there in just over eight years, before directing us to the previously mentioned Registration Center. It is revealed here that AI Rambley has access to the cameras (both computer cameras and CCTV cameras), where he notes that Ed isn’t on the guest list, probably because he snuck in, and didn’t pay for his tickets. However, what stands out as odd is that Rambley doesn’t recognize Ed at all, asking if he was here for the first time. We know that it’s most definitely not Ed’s first time here, but it’s unclear if AI Rambley doesn’t recognize Ed because he grew up, or the registration process requires a photo upload.
Rambley AI: "Hm, I don't seem to have your face in the guest list. Is this your first time here in the park? Or did you just get plastic surgery?"
From here, Ed’s directed to go through the gates, but both AI Rambley and Ed realize that the gates are not open and are instead sending an error message. Going back to the Registration Center, Ed finds and replaces a missing gear, and the gates finally open, from where Ed is free to explore. He’s directed to the Critter Corner, where he receives a Critter Cuff to enter certain areas, and the park, from where he’s directed to Rambley’s Railway to get to know most (poor Salem) of the characters. A massive statue of Isaac Indigo and Rambley can be seen at the entrance.
As Ed makes his way through to Rambley Railway, it’s clear that the park is not in the best condition. Ransacked gift stores, empty cafes with rotting food and festering drinks, tunnels collapsing at the drop of a hat, and weeds spouting everywhere even disconcert the AI Rambley, who tries to shrug off the state of the park by claiming renovations, but it’s clear he’s unsettled with how empty and broken the park is. We’ll cover that later as well.
On this ride, Rambley introduces us to everyone, except for Salem, indicating he’s friends with everyone except her and Lloyd, for whom he has … let’s a bit of distaste for. He’s shown to be sarcastic and snippy with Lloyd, but even his supposed friends aren’t safe from his occasional jabs.
Rambley when speaking to Mollie Macaw: “You sure are [the best pilot you ever saw], Moll! Why, you only crashed into six barns this week!”
Mollie: “I’m not crashin’, Rambley! I’m barnstormin’!”
Rambley: “Haha! What’s barnstorming?”
Mollie: “It’s crashing, with style! I-it barely hurts at all!”
The stutter in Mollie’s audio is what interests me. It could be interpreted as a glitch, which is certainly possible. The park hasn’t been maintained in eight years, and it is falling apart. But it could also be interpreted as Mollie losing her characteristic confidence, upset that Rambley seems to be so keen on pointing out her failures in her hobby sphere.
Rambley, when speaking to Finley the Sea Serpent: “Why the long face? And body? … Oh Finley, you should come out of YOUR shell!”
Finley, in response. “How about YOU come into it instead?”
I would also like to note AI Rambley’s interaction with Finley’s plushie.
AI Rambley: “Ooh, you found my buddy Finley! You know, he’s really shy, like, TOO shy, like OBNOXIOUSLY shy, but he’s got a good heart.”
I want to point out the fact that when Rambley speaks about how shy Finley is, he doesn’t seem to be doing it in a jesting way. In fact, he seems genuinely annoyed with how introverted Finley is, to the point where you can hear it in his voice, and he also uses his annoyed model with slanted eyes when mentioning it.
There’s also a note here that, apparently, Rambley and Finley have known each other for over 100 years, though it’s unclear if this is actually real information, or just something the creators of the ride decided to include for the fun of it.
And another thing. At the very end of the Finley section, Finley hopes that the rider will actually visit him and Oceanic Odyssey, because he’s lonely. Why should he be lonely? He’s friends with Rambley and Mollie, at the very least. Is it because he lives on the bottom of the ocean? Or for other reasons?
Ed then reaches Salem’s area, which is noticeably, horrifically destroyed, a splatter of something bright red front and center. This is where the ride breaks down, and Ed’s required to go and fix it, before continuing onto Lloyd’s area.
I’d like to stop the story to consider the state of Salem’s area; why is it so destroyed? I’m going to avoid thinking of the red splatter as blood, to be honest, but we do know that the Mascots bleed red, thanks to Mollie Macaw. In my mind, there are three potential perpetrators.
The first two are noticeably weak connections, and the reasoning isn’t 100%, so take it with a grain of salt. We know that all the characters received Mascots, so there are three of them that, in my mind, are capable.
The first is, admittedly, a bit weird: the Mascot of Salem. We know she despises Rambley and his friends (her relationship with Lloyd remains a mystery), so it’s possible that Mascot Salem was the one to sabotage her area, as a way of getting back at Rambley. Why her area only is admittedly a bit weird, so she’s not the strongest match. Another piece of evidence would be the smashed animatronic of Mollie. Again, we do know that Salem has used Mollie before by dumping her potions onto her and making Mollie Salem’s minion. Could she also have smashed the animatronic bird?
The second suspect is Mascot Mollie. She can be seen following Ed throughout the ride, and the whole park, for that matter, and we do know there is some bad blood between her and Salem because of the arcade game Rambely Rush. It would give motive for Mascot Mollie to do such a thing, and she’s the only Mascot running about Indigo Park that we know of; Lloyd remained in his theater, not pursuing Ed when he leaves. At the end of the chapter, when Ed enters Oceanic Odyssey, it’s unclear whether a robot or Mascot Finley appears in the aquarium, but he’s likely confined there as well. Mascots Rambley and Salem aren’t even mentioned once.
Now, this one is also kind of a stretch, but the only character that would have more reason to hate Salem more than Mollie is Rambley. They are clear nemeses (again, Rambley Rush), and have been for quite some time. While the AI Rambley is generally benevolent, but still with a sharp tongue, it remains to be seen what exactly the Mascot Rambley is like. His Mascot is still likely here in Indigo Park somewhere, one of the remaining two (Mollie being dead, unless there are several of each Mascot present, in which case this elevates the terror a few notches. Imagine being chased by seventeen Mascot Lloyds) besides Salem. He could very well be the perpetrator. However, I do have a bit of trouble explaining why he would wreck the Animatronic Mollie. Maybe because he knows it’s just a fake, and not the real Mascot Mollie?
However, there is one convenient detail that I have not mentioned. Remember the smashed Animatronic Mollie, and how we were questioning why she was wrecked in the first place? Well, she does offer us one clue. When Ed approaches the bird, Mollie flickers to life momentarily, her voice garbled and distorted until finally, she says this:
Animatronic Mollie: “Not Rambley! He hurts Lloyd! He hurts Lloyd!”
After that, poor Animatronic Mollie finally shuts off for good, her painted eyes devoid of the life she once had. Well, this certainly got interesting, didn’t it? Rambley hurts Lloyd? How? I mean, think about it! How would a raccoon actively hurt a lion? This isn’t like a honey badger situation; raccoons are much more vulnerable and weaker than honey badgers. What’s also interesting is her words themselves. Why would someone program an Animatronic Mollie to say this? We eventually find out that Mascot Mollie will memorize and be able to repeat words or phrases she’s heard, if Ed has the misfortune of being caught by Mascot Mollie later down the line. Is it possible that the same is true for the animatronics? And if so, does that mean that Animatronic Mollie was shouting bits and pieces out of context, or was it supposed to be something she was never meant to hear, and was thusly wrecked?
And even if this was out of context, that still opens up a major can of worms. Even if Rambley never hurt Lloyd, who is this ‘He’ that did hurt Lloyd? Keep this in mind until we reach Lloyd’s attraction.
Anyways, onto Llyod’s area. It’s clear that Lloyd and Rambley both don’t like each other, quite possibly because Rambley hates how Lloyd used to be number one, and Lloyd possibly because he’s not happy that he was replaced by Rambley as head honcho. Rambley, for his part, doesn’t really try to antagonize Lloyd, just wearily going through the ride and trying to get out as fast as possible here.
And that’s essentially it for the ride, AI Rambley suggesting Ed go visit Jetstream Junction. Careful observation would yield the fact that Mascot Mollie has been stalking Ed, studying him from behind the scenes, though she won’t end up being an antagonist until later on.
What’s interesting to note is that at the end, AI Rambley says this: “So, whatddya think? Pretty fun, right? Now you know all about my friends! And Lloyd …”
We know that Rambley cannot stand Salem, Rambley Rush made it quite clear. So, why refer to Salem as a friend? Why is her area so wrecked? Is it possible that AI Rambley has no reason to hate her, because he’s not aware of how often he’s pitted against her in media? But that would also mean that AI Rambley would have to be quite unaware of the media surrounding him, but he seems to know a lot about the history of the park. He still dislikes Lloyd, after all. And then that would beg the question if Mascot Rambley actually dislikes Salem enough to destroy her area in his ride. Too many questions that, unfortunately, there are no answers for. We can’t even see AI Rambley’s thoughts on Salem through a plush or anything, because there are no current collectibles in Chapter 1 that refer to her.
This is actually why I think one of the more intriguing aspects of ‘Birds of a Feather’ is Salem, and her ambiguous presence within the game. There aren’t even any posters in regard to her, unlike Lloyd or Rambley or Mollie or Finley. She’s just so wrapped up in mystery … anyways.
After finding out Jetstream Junction is locked away, AI Rambley sends Ed to Lloyd’s Main Stage Theater, where Ed first catches a glimpse of Mascot Lloyd, dozing on the stage. When Mascot Lloyd notices Ed, he runs into the back, and unfortunately, that’s where Ed has to go.
When Ed reaches the stage himself, AI Rambley tells Ed to be careful, because he has no vision of the backstage area, which is weird. AI Rambley seems to have access to the rest of Indigo Park, why is this area so special? It’s just storage, for the most part … and Mascot Lloyd, but AI Rambley still thinks they’re just as good as they were in their hay day, so he has no reason to be wary of the Mascots themselves until later. It’s true that it’s a Ranglers Only area, and we haven’t really seen AI Rambley in these areas before, so that could be it? Maybe because of his dislike for Lloyd? But then why give AI Rambley access to the stage at all? I don’t know, to be honest. Yet another question. However, AI Rambley does say something interesting.
AI Rambley, to Ed, regarding the behind the stage area: “Hey buddy. I got eyes all over the park, but I can’t see anything behind the stage. If you’re going back there be careful. Your Critter Cuff is not yet able to resuscitate you.”
Why should a Critter Cuff be able to resuscitate a person? From what I understand, it’s supposed to be like those Disney Bands that you can wear at parks, giving you access to different rides and such, even having complementary features of being a pedometer, mood ring, and a heartbeat sensor. This could either be a sort of tease to future upgrades Ed might be able to get in future chapters … or implies something darker. These Critter Cuffs were given to regular guests, for what purpose should they be able to revive someone from being unconscious?
Anyways, as Ed makes his way backstage, Lloyd makes some appearances, even once trying to attack Ed before being foiled by the massive boxes landing on him, causing him to slink away. Along the path, however, is something interesting. Binders, pages, even notebooks are scattered, almost like a bread crumb trail. I was never able to make out what they say besides some months like January, or vague Table of Contents with no explanation. Just thought it was weird. Food for thought. Grabbing the keys, Ed heads back, finding the door locked behind him. Trying to open the door yields an attack by Lloyd, who is strangely repelled by a high-pitched noise.
Now, from all that I have read, there seem to be two theories as for why Lloyd flees. The first cause is that Mascot Lloyd is driven away by the high-pitched beeping from the Critter Cuff. The second, and arguably more intriguing theory, is that someone blows a tamer’s whistle. A tamer’s whistle is a whistle used by tamers to direct animals, usually in settings like circuses where the animal has to perform some sort of trick or feat of athleticism. As it’s used more and more often, the animal learns to recognize the pitch, or duration of the shrill sound, associating it with a certain action that needs to be performed. In this case, the theory states that the tamer’s whistle caused Lloyd to fall back, before fleeing.
Now, while I think the tamer whistle theory is cool in concept, I don’t know who would be able, or more importantly, willing to save Ed from Mascot Lloyd. AI Rambley is not able to see what’s back here, nor should he understand what’s happening, so that removes him from the picture. Mascot Mollie is a possibility, perhaps wanting to save Ed for herself, as she’s seen stalking and watching Ed ever since Rambley’s Railroad, and even appears briefly in the hallway when Ed exits the theater backstage, but why want Ed for herself? They probably don’t need food, else they would have died, sweet pastries and sugary drinks present or not. They were left alone for eight years, after all. The thrill of the hunt would be the only explanation. And then there are our two unknowns, running about the park: Mascot Rambley and Mascot Salem. Could they have been the ones to do it? But why assume they’d act differently towards Ed? Surely they’d still be hostile?
And if the Critter Cuff was the savior, why was it ineffective against Mascot Mollie? Could it be because of the physiological and biological differences between Mascots Lloyd and Mollie? And why did it go off only when Lloyd was nearby? After Lloyd is repelled, the noise stops, after all. Was it the elevated heart rate that tipped off the defense mechanism? But again, surely it would have done the same when Ed would be chased by Mascot Mollie?
Remember what Animatronic Mollie told Ed with her dying breath? ‘Not Rambley! He hurts Lloyd! He hurts Lloyd!’ Could this be what Mollie was referring to? After all, Lloyd didn’t just run away; he collapsed a few feet away from Ed for a brief stint, paws pressing against his ears as Lloyd curled up into a fetal position, only running away when the high-pitched sound ended. Mascot Lloyd genuinely seemed in great pain, and was only able to run away, quite hastily, may I add, once the sound stopped. Was Rambley, AI or Mascot, the one who abused such a feature? Or was it someone else?
Remember, we have no idea why the Mascots turned hostile. Possibly due to a lack of exposure to humans, and thus claiming certain territories for themselves. After all, Mollie didn’t attack Ed until he entered her designated area. But then that brings into question Mascot Rambley. Where was he all this time? Rambley Railroad is his place, after all. But this isn’t Rambley’s only attraction in Indigo Park. At least one other location that we find that bears Rambley’s name is ‘Café de Raton Laveur’, which is French for Raccoon Café. Does that mean that Rambley owns other attractions, and is stalking those? It’s unclear.
Anyways, want to know another possible reason why there was a sudden evacuation with no explanation? What if the Mascots rebelled against the humans because of mistreatment? Think about it, Animatronic Mollie says ‘Not Rambley! He hurts Lloyd! He hurts Lloyd!’ What if Animatronic Mollie wasn’t referring to Rambley hurting Lloyd, but someone else? Someone who would want to design a special feature built into his Critter Cuff that he could activate and subdue, if not straight up hurt Lloyd? And who is the only other male character that we know of besides Rambley, Lloyd, Finley, and Ed?
That’s right, Isaac Indigo himself. This could very well be a case of mistreated creatures rebelling against the horrors they endured. Think about it, when in stressful situations, the mind, both human and not, is much more willing to go into fight or flight, is much more likely to punch first, question later. Is it possible that this Animatronic Mollie caught a snippet of a conflict that arose between the Mascots, when Mascot Mollie was trying to mediate? While this does go against the theory that Animatronic Mollie was destroyed by Mascot Rambley to silence her, it’s still a possible theory, no?
Again, these theories are very much a stretch, I just wished to lay them out on the table and offer them up for people to see and debate.
After grabbing the keys, Ed goes to Jetsream Junction, where Ed goes about exploring and solving some puzzles in order to progress further into the building, as it seems to be the only other place that isn’t falling apart and seems to be in somewhat stable condition. Inside one of the rooms is the Rambley Rush arcade game, and there is something interesting that Salem says in here.
Salem, speaking to Rambley: “Meet the new and improved Marley Macaw! Now with none o’ that ‘friendship’ garbage stopping her from tearin’ you to pieces. I wonder what she REALLY thinks of you now? Have fun finding out!”
Now, this could just be me overanalyzing this thing. It’s our only reference to Salem, and some of the things I cite as evidence could very well just be regular dialogue for an arcade game. However, on the off chance that this means something, I was very interested in what Salem said about what Mollie thought of Rambley. She makes it seem like Mollie is under some sort of illusion in regard to Rambley, like he’s a villain masquerading as a good guy, but has everyone around him convinced he’s good. This could tie in with the broken Animatronic Mollie, as if Mollie found out about some truth in regard to Rambley. After all, her broken, jittering speech made it seem like Rambley was actively hurting Lloyd. Could she have gone to someone to get help, but that other someone suggested Rambley as an ally? That could explain why Mollie felt the need to emphasize that ‘He hurts Lloyd’ twice, like she’s genuinely freaking out that her best friend actively hurt others he didn’t like.
Putting that theory aside, Ed goes through the area, heading up to Mollie’s ride, only to find it inaccessible due to major chunks of broken debris. AI Rambley seems sort of horrified to find the place so broken and calls up a repair technician. It’s no surprise that the line is discontinued, due to most Ranglers likely being laid off after the closure of Indigo Park.
From here, AI Rambley, still somewhat jarred by the wreckage he’s seeing, encourages Ed to go and visit Mollie’s Landing Pad, strangely acting as if Ed had just finished his journey on the attraction, when he couldn’t even step onto it. From there, Ed goes and solves some puzzles, making his way deeper into the building. He spots Mollie a few times as she gets away from him, hiding. What’s an interesting note is that some sort of liquid seems to be dripping from Mollie. When you encounter her in one of the tubes, she leaves behind some sort of reddish grime that disappears once her animation is done. Her eyes, also, aren’t the way they’re usually portrayed. They’re similar to Lloyd’s in that there are white pinpricks of light in dark sockets, Lloyd’s being thin ovals in dark sockets.
As Ed finishes up the puzzles, he goes deeper before he’s attacked by Mascot Mollie herself, fleeing through the numerous tubes and tunnels, before eventually leaving it all behind and entering some sort of Ranglers Only Area.
Before we continue, I’d like to point out something. When being chased, Mascot Mollie occasionally rehearses some lines she once heard, repeating this.
Finely, to Rambley: “You’ve known me for 100 years.”
Reasonable enough; she was there when Ed was in the Rambley’s Railroad attraction. No, what concerns me are two other lines, identified by SuperHorrorBro in his analysis of chapter one.
Mascot Mollie: “Get back in your cage, bird.”
And finally, this.
Mascot Mollie: “Get up you stupid freak!”
Remember, Mascot Mollie only repeats what she has once heard. She doesn’t actively make her own dialogue. Remember the theory I had about the Mascots having enough of their terrible living conditions, and rebelling against the staff? It seems like this is the right direction to go in. Lloyd and Mollie do not attack immediately. While Lloyd runs away, Mollie observes, watching, biding her time. She follows you to Lloyd’s theater, and what does she see, or, rather, hear? Lloyd being pushed further and further back into his domain, the one place he should be happy, before being forced into a corner, and where he lashes out. Even though Ed ends up leaving, he ends up claiming a piece of Lloyd’s territory, and Lloyd goes back onto his instincts, to hunt. However, when he gets too close, that blasted, accursed Critter Cuff lets out its horrible whine, Lloyd collapsing, consumed with nothing but pain. Once the sound ends, he flees, like a terrified animal.
And what does Ed see when he leaves? Mascot Mollie, observing Ed. She’s seen that, yet again, a human encroaches, pushes their bounds, eventually hurting Lloyd to get what he wants. And then, he goes to Mollie’s home, the Jetstream Junction, a place she’s been locked out of due to needing a Critter Cuff, but she wouldn’t dare touch one. She saw what happened to Lloyd, who knew what sort of anguish it would inflict upon Mollie?
She enters behind Ed, stalking him, fury building as she watches Ed run about like he owns the place. How dare this man, this human, walk upon her domain whenever he wants, but she has to wait until she’s let in, like some sort of caged bird. Well, she’s not a caged bird, and she’ll make Ed see that.
At first, when AI Rambley sees Ed, he wishes to stop Ed, but seeing a towering Mascot Mollie chasing him, he opens the door, slamming it shut behind Ed just as Mascot Mollie’s head enters the room, killing the Mascot instantly as blood sprays all over the metallic door and floor. AI Rambley attempts to act like nothing happened, but fails, sighing.
He explains that he didn’t realize the danger of Indigo Park and its inhabitants due to being stuck in that early Reception Center for all of those eight, lonely years, unable to see or interact with anything inside. He was just so excited to finally see an actual person that he pushed Ed into this tour, realizing that, with the way things were, there was no way Ed would come out unscathed, and the AI seems genuine in his sorrow. However, he asks for Ed to help restore the park to the former glory, and, miraculously, Ed agrees. However, before Ed leaves, AI Rambley drops this one last piece of vital information.
AI Rambley: “Whew! That was exhausting to say that whole spiel, but Rambley’s Ranglers (registered) is a registered trademark … that expired yesterday.”
Okay, so couple things. From my impression, I had the feeling that somehow, someway the Indigo Company as a whole was alive and kicking. I mean, look at what Ed has to say when he interacts with the Rambley Raccoon plushy.
Ed: “Ah, there’s my buddy. Kinda feels like Rambley has a whole empire now, being the main man of Indigo and all.”
Ed gives us the distinct impression that not only is Indigo still around, but it’s also positively thriving, yet they allow their trademarks to expire? Trademarks essentially last forever, but you have to fight, in court, to let them continue every ten years or so. If Indigo is based on Disney, the stingiest, largest entertainment company, why would they let their trademark expire, and give access to others? Well, this might have to do with the initial terms.
You see, in order to keep a trademark, you have to defend its usage every ten years. Well, okay, then why didn’t Indigo do so? One of the terms for renewal is that you have to continuously use that trademark. You can’t just claim one and never use it again, that’s basically an infraction upon free speech. Sure, you can fight for its ownership, but there are rules and regulations to these kinds of things, you can’t just trademark something like ‘Oof’ or ‘Lmao’ and keep it without at least saying those phrases occassionally.
And, so far as we know, there are no other places such as Indigo Park owns. Ranglers are synonymous with staff in the park, so obviously, it would be hard to justify keeping a trademark when you never expect to use it. So, that’s my theory on why the trademark did indeed expire the day previously, October 6^th, 2023 (apparently, the creator confirmed the game takes place in 2023, so, that means that Ed arrives on October 7^th, 2023, and the last person to enter park left on October 7^th, 2015).
Anyways, after that, AI Rambley leads Ed to Oceanic Odyssey with the intention to get it back up and running, as it has been closed due to repairs, something that AI Rambley hopes Ed can assist with. As Ed exits, he tries entering a hallway, which AI Rambley blocks.
AI Rambley: “Uh oh. That Rambley’s Ranglers room is only accessible by Royal Ranglers. Maybe you’ll grow up big and strong enough to enter it! But for now, don’t.”
This is the first instance of hierarchy within the Ranglers that Ed has been introduced to so far, and the dark undertone AI Rambley takes when he tells Ed not to go there is somewhat concerning. What exactly is AI Rambley hiding back there? Well, I have a few hunches.
Let’s point out the obvious regarding our friends, the Mascots; they’re not regular animals. Obviously, regular animals don’t have dark orbitals with thin white slits, or have turquoise noses, or have macaws the size of cassowaries. However, they are still animals, creatures of flesh and blood that act like their regular animal counterparts; Lloyd is an ambush predator, stalking until he himself is presented with an opportunity to attack. However, lions are known to just straight up attack if they are discovered by accident, especially if the prey is weaker and slower than them. Lloyd runs away instead of attacking.
Similarly, Mollie follows Ed warily, unsure of what to think of him for most of the time. She never aggresses until he enters her territory, and even then, she’s surprisingly lenient with Ed, straight up until he finishes those color-coded symbol puzzles. Only then does she attack. And even then, this is a behavior reflected in regular macaws as well, as these birds are fiercely territorial of their area.
So, these Mascots didn’t pop up straight from the ground, did they? They had to be bioengineered at the very least, mutated regular animals becoming the Mascots guests once knew and loved. They are, however, animals at their core, animals that do not attack for no reason. They try to deescalate the situation, as Lloyd does when he runs backstage, and when Mollie pulls herself back through the tunnels, away from Ed, and striding through the corridors, until she eventually loses patience and chases after Ed through Jetsream Junction.
I’d like to propose the theory that these Mascots were created in that area of Jetstream Junction, hidden underground and away from prying eyes. This is also where the Mascots were likely mistreated and abused, called horribly names at the very least, and endured beatings and humiliating acts at their worst. This is also likely where the Mascots originally snapped. After all, literally not a single guest understands why they were evacuated. Unless the guests who saw what happened were silenced, there should have been something floating around the Internet, on some obscure forum.
Now, why would AI Rambley hide this? Because he now understands that these Mascots are dangerous, a risk he cannot allow, since he enlisted Ed to bring the park back from the dead. AI Rambley realizes that Ed doesn’t have the tools to survive that area; perhaps because one of the Mascots lurks in there, locked away, or because he doesn’t want Ed to flee, horrified as to the scientific process that allowed for the mutated abominations to roam Indigo Park.
Regardless, Ed finally makes his way to the entrance of Oceanic Odyssey, home of the Mascot Finley. In fact, we actually get to see a glimpse of Finely’s actual size in one of the aquariums as his large head and long torso appear, before the chapter ends. I don’t believe that this is an animatronic, as electricity and water do not mix, especially animatronic with running current of electricity in water.
And that’s where Chapter 1 of Indigo Park, ‘Birds of a Feather’, ends off. Chapter Two will likely revolve mostly, if not totally, around Oceanic Odyssey and Mascot Finley.
So, I have two predictions as for where the next chapter might go. Based on the reactions Mascots previously had to Ed, I believe that Mascot Finley will not be attacking immediately. He’ll likely be observing, like Mollie, at least for a certain amount of time, until he proceeds to attack and harass Ed around his attraction. Ed will eventually get Oceanic Odyssey up and running, and have to leave Mascot Finley behind, as he’s still hostile and very much a danger to Ed.
The alternative to this is that once Mascot Finely realizes what Ed is trying to do, he stops being aggressive, and might instead become a temporary ally, allowing Ed to reach certain locations with his knowledge of the place.
Regardless of Mascot Finley’s ultimate fate, Oceanic Odyssey being powered on will likely catch the attention of Indigo. Based on the information we know so far, Indigo is still a well known, public entity. It’s possible that Indigo abandoned the theme park route, instead focusing exclusively on media such as cartoons, movies, and merch, or they might have other sister locations to Indigo Park. It’s unclear.
Whew. In the words of AI Rambley, this is a lot of information. Almost nine thousand words in, and we finally finish covering Chapter 1. So, let’s proceed to the Conclusion I draw regarding the story Indigo Park tries to tell, and the future events that might transpire.

I cooked on an Akorn cart I got from Home Depot several years ago for about 6 years and upgraded to a used XL Big Green Egg I received as a gift. My Akorn was pretty beat up, I didn't take the greatest care of it. The ash basket was pretty rusty. It was pretty beat up and I ended up trashing it.
However, there are so many things I liked better about the Akorn. The removable ash basket is way easier to empty. I could move the cart without having to worry it's going to get knocked over. I love how the grate is flush with the lid. Way easier to cook skewers. The charcoal lasts waay longer as well. My first brisket cook on my BGE, I ran out or charcoal. Meanwhile my Akorn would have had a ton left. It holds the heat a lot better (although a lot harder to cool down). Honestly besides looks and longevity, I think it was superior in almost every other way. Kind of a random thought, but a post on the BGE subreddit made me think of some of these things.

Yesterday, I had my graduation ceremony. After years of university with absolutely no help besides occasional rides to the bus stop and, very rarely, to campus, I finally graduated. Here's what my parents have done in the lead-up to graduation and the day after instead of supporting me.
My parents spent months leading up to the graduation freaking out about how I'll get a job, trying to control my hair and clothing (even implying I'm ugly when I choose my own hair and clothing), harassing me to hand out business cards to everyone I meet (especially if the situation would be an immense faux pas), grilling me on if my grades are good, lecturing me relentlessly about how I need to keep in contact with people in my class and it's soooo important and would I like to hear about how my dad got a job through nepotism for the eightieth time, asking me questions they already know the answers to (Yes, I'm still talking to my former classmates. Yes, I know that you worked in the Yukon when you were 18. Yes, I know about your friend who worked in a weather station. Yes, I know you had to move to find a job in the 1980s. Yes, I am aware that it is a possibility I might have to move too. Yes, I know that it's okay to invite people over to the house, you've only "informed" me about a hundred times. Yes, I know that school is important.) Every single thing that they "inform" me about is something I have very clearly expressed that I understand, and is just thinly veiled criticism. But my dad needs to lecture more than he needs oxygen.
Just constant nitpicking, criticism, and nothing I ever did was enough. I couldn't even focus on grades, because they would in their own words "put pressure on" me to do what they wanted. To handle their emotions for them. They're obsessed with the idea that I would have to move to a tiny town or work in a coal mine to find a job, because I'm more highly educated than my dad (who dropped out of university despite having all expenses paid by his father), and because my dad worked in the Yukon for two summers. He will never shut up about that, and he even goes so far as to hold us hostage with implicit threat of a massive tantrum to listen to him tell us the story again and again and again and to show us pictures of the place he worked on Google maps and point to everything he remembers. Sometimes he can go on for half an hour just repeating himself over and over.
Last summer, my parents even went and took action without my knowledge or approval to try and get a job set up for me cleaning up a mine contaminated with arsenic in the middle of nowhere, NWT. They tried to guilt and shame me into it ("What are your plans instead? Do you have another job lined up? Because you need to have a job. You can't sit around all day." This coming almost literally one week into summer vacation after my second-last year of university, when I could be using my energy to find interesting co-ops or explore hobbies or travel, instead dealing with their harassment and obsession with trying to literally trap me in a fucking arsenic mine.) They went on and on, lectured me over and over, implied that I would be embarrassing my grandfather if I didn't go, and so on. Eventually they said "You can go work or get a certification", and I picked the certification, but then they got grumpy anyways, and every week for the entire summer they would ask "Are you still working on the certification?". Of course, dipsh*t. I've told you fifty times how long the program lasts.
They don't care about what I'm learning in class, don't care about my hobbies or interests, only care about my friends as either a means to get backdoored into a job or a "nice French Canadian woman" to have babies with. They don't care if I'm struggling, and are completely unavailable to help in any regard. Any request for help would result in a guilt trip. Even if I actually couldn't eat dinner with the family for one day because I had a test, my father would get raw emotions and I'd have to walk on eggshells for a few days. The one time I mentioned I was having trouble studying, instead of shutting up and no longer ranting in the main floor where I could hear him or turning the TV off, he just dragged a table into the unfurnished boiler room (without asking me) and then told me that I would have to study there. I wasn't allowed to choose not to, because he'd already set it up. Ironically, my anger at him did let me study pretty well for the one day that I was forced there. He tried to keep me there long-term because he thought it was just such a great idea, but I managed to trick him into thinking I didn't need help studying anymore, so I got to study at a desk with a light on it and flooring that wasn't bare cement. Hooray for the most minor victory imaginable.
In the months leading up to graduation, did they care about how hard I was working at my capstone project and offer support? Absolutely not! Did they care about how well my sleep quality was, how many times the cat woke me up because they didn't play with her enough or give her enough attention? Nope! Did they care about how exhausting it was to deal with their constant lectures on the same topics, and to have to give them affirmations ("Yes, you're right, that's right, good job, nice, very tasty, good work, oh really?, neat, that's cool, how'd you make that?, mhm, I agree, you're being reasonable, they're being ridiculous, that's crazy") a hundred times a day? Not even in the slightest!
We spend more time talking about my dad's college friends than about anything I or my brother care about.
Then, leading up to graduation. all I've gotten are the most humiliating, infuriating, insulting messages and lectures from my parents. I get almost daily emails and texts saying "You need to get a job, it's important to look for a job" despite the fact I've told them I am looking probably fifty times. Too cowardly to say it to my face. I've been texted literal links to a Google search for "[degree name] jobs [city]" more than once. Both my parents treat me like I don't listen, when I do. They treat me like I'm lazy, when I've put myself through university with no help even after they lied to me about giving me financial aid and made me out to be a bully demanding more money when all I did was say "alright" and then pay for it myself. They must have sternly given me a talking to about how "I'm not going to pay for university, you know that, right? You need to pay. Don't expect us to pay. Because we paid for your first semesters, you know that, right? We've already paid for enough." thirty times, even after I'd made the final payment. They treat me like I'm stupid when I have expressed understanding before. They treat me like I'm a bully while I always bend over backwards for them, just because I don't play my role as "surrogate mommy but this time I get to tell her what to do" well enough.
It feels like they're almost raising me into a replacement or surrogate parent. Like my dad wants me to be his mom or dad, except this time he gets to be in charge. And my mom wants me to be her mom, except this time when she freaks out or has her deer in headlights look, she'll get someone to step up and take care of everything for her. I distinctly remember having to comfort her even for things she did to me, like tell me that a pair of comfortable shoes I picked out was good and she'd get them, and then immediately scream "take it out, take it out!" after it was scanned at the register. I could not have been older than twelve. And for my dad, he always rants and raves to me exactly like he does to his parents, except without including blame for them sending him to boarding school and instead having tons of old "life updates" like where he worked when he was 18 and what music he liked to listen to in high school, stuff like that. Then he expects me to praise him or be interested like his parents never were (he always tells me that his parents only cared about his car when they called).
So now I graduated. All they had to say in the days coming up to it was to grill me on the time I'd have to be at the venue and the time I was planning to leave the house to get there on time, with a distinct air of "you're too lazy to think of this in advance and too stupid to figure it out without a plan". Of course, I had to answer this question probably five times, because they don't care to ever listen to me. Before the ceremony I got text messages showing they were way more excited about themselves being here than anything relating to me, with multiple messages expressing how they arrived and it was exciting, then they asked me how the atmosphere was and their only reply was a one-word "nice" with no punctuation, because they don't care about me and only ask droll questions to segue into their next bit.
After grad, there was two generic sentences spoken with no emotion about how it was nice I graduated, and then they made a whole song and dance about the amazing gifts they got me. It was a degree frame I picked out myself that my dad presented as new and exciting (because he never pays attention to me, of course, when I told him I had picked one out and ordered it with my mother. Also she had another freakout about price and acted like I was holding her hostage by taking her unforced offer to buy me the second-cheapest degree frame on offer.). Then he presented the free gift small frame they got with it as though I should praise him for it, then a congratulation card that was alright I suppose if only because my brother drew a little creature in it that made me smile (my parents did not add anything special or meaningful to it). There was also a cap, which I genuinely enjoy and is nice, and a cheap ballpoint pen for some reason. He said there was more gifts at home, which okay, I don't care about gifts but I'd like him to at least be as excited for my graduation as he was for the picture frame. I didn't get any souvenirs from the bookstore because I knew if I got something he'd also gotten he'd freak out and accuse me of not listening to him or whatever, so I waited. When I got home my gift was Skittles. I don't know why I thought me might have gone to the bookstore and gotten me something special related to my actual interests. He doesn't care to know what those are anyways. I guess I hoped that at least this one day would be different.
Today, the day after graduation, all I've gotten from my parents is:
- Involved in a lecture and manufactured drama about my brother not using my car to drive to his job, even though my dad had the exact opposite position the entire rest of the year, because "what if you need to drive somewhere?", trying to manufacture a fight between my brother and me while also guilting and shaming me for not driving as a hobby like he does.
- A text message from my mother asking me if I'm awake because she wants more ammo to paint me as lazy. Nevermind that I barely slept the night before to make it to grad (of course neither of my parents would care enough about me to come with me as a family. I was literally the only person I saw who went on my own and without their family showing up early too, to support them. I walked past so many families in the parking lot knowing my mother couldn't be bothered to change out of her pajamas for me.) Nevermind I had a huge day that day, and that I was taking care of the cat's energy all that night too because attending my grad is apparently soooo draining my parents can't look after their own pet, and somehow it falls to me. All that matters is she woke up early and I didn't (after I handled all her inconveniences for her, funny how that works).
- Rapid knocks on my door because my dad is making bread as a hobby and apparently "needs" me there to help him with it, and then also "needed" me to stay and make cookies with him.
- A lecture about someone I never knew who apparently once threw something at another kid on my street when I was about 5, and about how he died and how his wife's hobby was really expensive or whatever and if I really don't remember him?
- I went to a showhome for fun and brought back the brochure. My dad jabbed his finger at the pictures on it to explain the house to me like I wasn't the one who literally brought the brochure back. Never asked if I cared or anything, just immediate launch into lecture and expecting me to stay and listen and praise him for being so smart or whatever.
- A lecture about D Day for some fucking reason. My dad is obsessed with history, and he doesn't have any friends to talk to (wonder why) so his lectures always fall on my ears.
- An email from my mother explaining in an extremely condescending way how important it is to have a cover letter when applying for jobs (just completely assuming I don't write them and also am too lazy or stupid to think about having them) including copy-pasted text from a sample cover letter that is no doubt one of the first results on google for "cover letter example"
- An angry email from my mother including a job she found on google
But, contrast that to my neighbors across the street. I was friends them in grade school, haven't seen them in like ten years, and just on my way past to the showhome we said hi and chatted in a genuinely nice conversation that wasn't a one-sided lecture like usual in my house. They could sense my emotions and didn't try to keep me there longer than I wanted to rant, they were genuinely interested in me and gave me space and interest to express myself, their mother even hugged me for graduating and it was the most genuine hug and congratulations I've ever received in person. Every other hug was my family members forcing me to hug them for their own sole benefit. I admit I cried a bit later on my walk thinking about it.
Compared to my parents, the parents of old friends care more about me, trust me more, believe in me more, have more hope for my future, are more interested in me, and understand me better. It's tremendously sad that all throughout my graduation ceremony I was worried about my parents becoming upset for some random reason and blowing up at me. I'm glad I at least focused and made myself feel some pride and joy in myself for graduating.
Even the random people I met who were also taking part in the open house were nicer and better conversationalists than my parents. A random elderly couple I have never seen in my life can have a better interaction with me than my own parents. The realtor was more chill and less perfectionistic than my parents by a mile. His million-dollar house sale was something he was less stressed and perfectionistic about and something he beat himself up over less than my parents are about my hairstyle when I'm going to class because "What if you meet someone in industry and they see you're not professional".
It's absurd.

So Ussops bounties tend to mirror Luffy's bounty development and after wano hes sitting at a cool 500 mil, adter egghead his will follow luffys up to 1.whater billion his bounty was. But I think to get to 3 billion berries like luffy after wano hes going to have to face off and beat buggy. This wouldnt be a difficult fight for ussop but Buggys bounty is sitting at close to 4 billion so it would make sense for Ussop to get that 3 billion bounty from beating him in the future. It would also be fitting story wise having the two best liars in the show come to blows.

I’m not the best at this but hear me out.

• Akademiks said that a “huge rapper” is secretly beefing with drake
• Akademiks says that the rapper has big songs with Drake(Sicko Mode is one of the biggest raps songs in recent history)
• Fans think it’s Travis Scott, (I also think its Travis, here’s why)
• Travis Scott was plastered all over the WDTY album, an album who’s rollout is centered around beefing with Drake+ Recently announced a shoe collaboration with Ye, who called for “The elimination of Drake” not too long ago
• Travis is known for being neutral during beefs(Let Drake is diss Ye on Sicko Mode, Let Drake diss Pharrel on Utopia{Pharrel is also on Utopia})
• But, this time I think it’s different, he’s definitely on a side, he SPECIFICALLY requested Metro/Future to play “Like That” at Rolling Loud
• But lets give Travis the benefit of the doubt, the version played at rolling loud wasn’t the Kendrick Diss version and “allegedly” Kendrick sent his verse last minute so maybe he aint know
• But he reposted the WDTY cover when it was about to drop, has 2 features and was in the Type Shit MV with CashXo(Also dissed by Drake)
• Travis knows Future/Metro are beefing with Drake he is showing them ALOT of support for a neutral guy
• I know what your thinking, there’s too much evidence that Drake and Trav are still cool such as the rumored European Tour, The floating Travis head at Drakes concert, and the “Travis got you wiped down” lyric on “push ups”
• I think these are all cover ups/smoke screens
• Starting off with the European Tour Rumors, it was hinted at via the grapevine on Twitter and Drake made a post hinting at it.
• But, Travis just announced his European/Worldwide leg for his tour, Drake is not involved, the Drake/Trav joint tour rumors are just rumors but if the rumors were actually true, this would mean Drake got removed from the tour. Well not “removed” but Travis didn’t wanna tour with him anymore.(Blind Items suggest that Drake doesn’t wanna go to the UK/Europe due to sex trafficking allegations)
• Next is the floating Travis Head that Drake shoots at, during Drake’s most recent tour this year, he had a massive Travis Scott head floating across stage whilst preforming “Meltdown”-
• Fans thought this was a jab at Travis, others think it’s “appreciation” or a “shoutout”
• I mean it’s obviously a shoutout right? Why would Drake have a massive Travis Scott head floating across stage if he didn’t like him?
• Let’s take look back at Drake’s character,
• On his most recent album “For All The Dogs” Drake has a song called “What Would Pluto Do” a song dedicated to his “friend” and long time collaborate, Future
• Fans loved the song and saw no maliciousness behind it, it’s a tribute song to Future, the title compares him to Jesus, and he’s rapping about how he’d fuck someone else’s girl because Future would do it. Great song displaying a friendship!
• However others found it weird that Drake didn’t feature Future on the song
• Nor did Future acknowledge the song, not even a post bumping it on his story
• Why would you pay a song made by your “friend” that’s shouting you out complete dust?
• Because he’s not shouting Future out
• It’s a massive sneak diss
• He’s bragging about fucking Future’s girl, and justifying it by saying Future would do the same to him
• “What would Pluto Do, He fucked the hoe so I did it”
• “What Would Pluto Do he definitely fucking on this hoe”
• So massive that no one knew it was a diss song until 5 MONTHS LATER, on the release of “We Don’t Trust You” “Sneak dissing I don’t understand dawg”
• It’s right there in the title track!
• The point is Drake is a massive sneak disser and bit extra/petty
• There has been smoke before the fire though, Future was allegedly mad at Drake for doing “Her Loss” instead of “WATTBA 2”
• But Drake was the first to publicly diss him
• Ye said “When Drake disses you, only you will know”
• If he can fake a an entire diss song towards Future, and mask it like they are still good friends publicly, he can do the same to Travis with the floating head.
• Not to mention, Metro was invited to IAAB tour in September 2023 and Drake first dissed Metro on a Metro beat with “More Ms” in November 2022 (He might’ve dissed Future there too)
• Don’t fall for the show antics, Drake hates these guys
• But there’s been tension before the sneak antics with Metro and Future but none with Travis, so maybe I’m just wrong.
• Next is Push Ups
• Everyone thinks the “Travis got you wiped down” bar is a Drake shouting out Travis
• But I think it’s something else, (I got the next point from a twitter dude)
• Drake wasn’t praising Travis, the point was to downplay Kendrick’s commercial success by naming other rappers and artists that are not Drake that outsold him
• He names Sza and 21 Savage, (21 Savage collab album with Drake sold 404k first week, Sos sold 318k, which is more than Mr Morales 295k)
• Other than Sza and Savage, how many other rappers/artists that are friends with Drake can say they “wiped down” Kendrick?
• He can’t say “Yeat got you wiped down, Sexyy Redd got you wiped down,” Durk Cole etc. They all sold less than Mr Morale.
• Therefore, he threw in Travis’s name as a placeholder to diminish Kendrick’s commercial success and add into the “he’s irrelevant” theory.
• Along with pretending to the public that he and Trav are still cool.
• The next part of my theory is all within the song Push Ups.
• On 4/12/24 after the release of Metro and Future’s second diss album, “We Still Don’t You”(Which had even more Drake disses) “Push Ups” leaked online
• It was the demo version that leaked and gained traction, Drake saw it and sent Akademiks the finished version, and dropped the song officially a week later.
• There’s some significant differences between the leaked version and the official, the beat is different, and the spoken word outro is cut off, but the lyrics within the song stayed the exact same, apart from two lines
• The Diddy Line
• And the “BM kiss and tell” Line
• Let’s start with the Diddy Line, when Drake was dissing Rick Ross in Push Ups, he brings up the Diddy raids
• Well not “brings up” he subtly mentioned it, didn’t even say his name
• “Every song he got it on the chart it came from Drizzy, worry about whatever going on with you and-“
• It cuts right before he mentions Diddy name which is supposed to be a subtle nod, but why is he scared to say Diddy name like he’s the boogeyman or something? Even on an unreleased demo
• The line is replaced with “Spend that lil check you got and stay tf up out by buisness”
• Could it be that Drake mentioning Diddy, and associating his name with sex trafficking could lead to some repercussions for Drake?
• Drake fans love bringing up the Diddy beef from a decade ago to insinuate that Drake is not involved with the weird sex stuff going on but Drake has been friends with Diddy for the last couple years.
• He drops a like on a Diddy ig post in September 2023, just months before Diddy’s first lawsuit accusing him of rape and abuse on Cassie
• This sub just revealed that Drake and Diddy are definitely associates via Nissan
• Drake would be the first rapper(Aside from 50, but first to do it in a song) to publicly call out Diddy for his sex crimes if he followed through with that line, the biggest one at that
• Drake saying that line would be throwing Diddy under the bus publicly.
• The blind items(which may or may not be true idk) suggest that Drake was throwing Dutchavelli under the bus with his sex crimes, and that another pedo rapper gossiped in jail that Drake should be with him
• And that’s exactly what Drake is doing, throwing Diddy under the bus
• Diddy still has access to social media and we know that other rappers, (Chris Brown, and Meek Mill friends with Drake) were at the Diddy parties fondling with minors.
• Drake follows Diddy son on IG, Diddy son was also partying with minors and sex workers, he’s just as complicit
• Could it be that if Drake name dropped Diddy and hinted at him being a pedo/trafficker in a song, hence throwing him under the bus, Diddy would have responded too? Would Diddy response be dragging Drake down with him? Is that why Drake deleted the line?
• “You gon make a nigga bring back Puff” could have a double meaning
• Kendrick can mention Diddy all he wants ”The Embassy bound to get raided TOO” Diddy can’t bring him down with evidence/confessionals.
• If Drake goes down, everyone else goes down, the industry is cooked, that’s why Metro had a tweet about “sparing the both of us”
• Kendrick isn’t going down, he’s not at these freaky rapper parties, he lives a boring life.
• But Drake?
• Who knows
• Keep in mind, when Push Ups first leaked, fans thought that Drake did it himself as a soft launch to test the waters and claim AI if the public thinks it’s ass
• But Akademiks(reliable Drake insider) says that the track may have leaked without Drake’s knowledge
• Also The Weeknd, who just had a song dissing Drake for having “leaks in their operation” posted a meme of him laughing the minute the song leaked.
• A reference track for Jumbotron Shit Poppin, made by Lil Yacthy also leaked a couple days after.
• If Drake does have a leak, and push ups leaking was a result, it adds onto the theory that Drake does NOT want to mention Diddy due to the potential consequences, and that the fans were not meant to hear that one.
• But Drake isn’t gonna publicly say “Guys don’t listen to that one I mentioned Diddy and I might get in trouble”
• He played it cool and changed the lyrics, no ones gonna notice
• Ok back to the main theory Drake V Travis Scott
• Another lyric change is “Rolling Loud stage y’all was turnt y’all was slick as hell, shit’ll change if your dog lil BM start to kiss and tell.” to “Shit’ll change if your Bm start to kiss and tell”
• Interesting…….
• We know that Push Ups is a direct response to Future/Metro, their “dog” is definitely Travis Scott, who was performing at Rolling Loud with Future/Metro, along with requesting “Like That”
• We know Drake hates the song, considering that according to Metro, he tried to block the song on radio.
• Travis Scott Bm is Kylie Jenner
• We know that 99% percent of Drake beefs center around women, if a rapper beefs with Drake their wife/significant other is getting mentioned. Unfortunately Travis on the receiving end.
• But this isn’t the first time Drake and Kylie have been paired together in a romantic context, theres been loads of dating rumors between them throughout the years
• Ye said ”Drake lives across the street from my wife and fucks all her friends” in a leaked phone call with Taylor Swift in 2016 . Does Kylie count as Kim’s “friend?”

EDIT I FORGOT THIS -Drake even has an unreleased song where he says”Real Shit, Kylie Jenner as a side piece, I got 20 damn Kylies”
EDIT AND THIS -Drake apologizes for the song later, but still weird to say that about a girl who you first met when you were a grown ass man and she was a minor?

• Drake would be the first to break his silence on these rumors and CONFIRM them by saying he smashed Kylie for the sake of the beef.
• Drake has known Kylie ever since she was young as 16, if Drake came out and said he smashed Kylie, people would make the connection that Drake fucking a girl that he first encountered as a minor, would be grooming
• And Drake definitely doesn’t want that label on him, considering that he “expected” it. So he changed the line and made sure it was directed at Future and Future only.
• The only lines that changed in the released and unfinished versions of Push Ups are coincidentally, the ones that cause Drake to Freudian slip himself(Kylie) or get him in trouble(Diddy)
• Hence why the track was leaked by a hater inside OVO and not Drake

In Conclusion IF the rapper beefing with Drake is Travis Scott it’s probably because of Kylie, if Drake smashed Kylie before/during/afte her relationship with Travis, he’s a certified pedophile. He doesn’t want the public to know that though, that’s why he removed Travis sub in Push Ups, we weren’t supposed to hear that, along with the Diddy line. There’s a leak in OVO, and that’s why the Travis beef is “secret”
Thank you to everyone who read through this, I apologize for it being a bit unorganized, I’ll add photos/tweets as evidence for the stuff in here soon. If I made a mistake/missing something lmk. If someone can make a shorter TDLR version that’s be appreciated ✌🏾.
UPDATE:Akademiks confirms the secret rapper is Travis right as I post this 😂

Secret Dragon - Chapter 2: Ignite
I opened the book and skimmed through a few chapters, happy to finally see some true information, with substance. Although I had many books of my own, I had never brought any of them to class; I had no intention of being asked about them or pressing the issue.
By virtue of my existence, it and I would be scrutinized. I had neither the patience nor the desire for another microscope to be placed above me.
But Sasha had no such reservations even after I told him about the curriculum, although he relented and said he would figure out a way around that nonsense. It seemed as if he was determined to go against the grain.
We spoke deeply, about different subjects, our project, and his books. The more he talked the more at ease he became. I unknowingly got closer and closer to him as the time passed. I had to literally pull myself back a few times. I wondered if he noticed. It was confusing how I kept leaning into the heat coming off his breath.
We were both startled at the sound of chairs scraping. We looked around as our peers gathered their things.
“It seems that for the first time this class is actually worth my time. Usually I am the first to leave,” Sasha said, surprised.
“I know,” I revealed.
“Hmmm,” he vocalized deeply. I had no idea if it was “oh really” or “interesting” or any other answer. It was just a deep throat vibration. I just knew he would do that a lot. I could feel it.
As I was packing my things, I realized I was a little feverish. I put a hand to my cheek. Was it hot? Or was it that he was speaking heat in my direction? I couldn’t tell. I never ran hot.
He watched me touching my face and chuckled to himself, putting away his books. I really wanted to be annoyed—at anyone else I would have been—but his lighthearted laughter surprised me; so joyous after so many weeks of being a specter in the classroom.
I looked him in his eyes, though, and shook my head challengingly at him, as if to say “what?” That only made him laugh out loud. It was both quiet and bassy all at the same time. The kind of laugh that was bottomless, scratchy. The kind of laugh you could tell would boom and shake you if given the space.
I never thought I’d hear that coming from him, let alone directed at me. I refrained from expressing an iota of emotion beyond a small smile. I had to stay cool.
Pam walked over to our table swiftly, no doubt looking to be rid of Jonah. She smiled at Sasha, grinned really.
“So. We finally meet! Pam Swiftwater,” she chirped. Her hand shot out as fast as she walked. Sasha halted his movement. He extended his hand more slowly, gently, engulfing her delicate hands in his large ones.
“Of course. I am Sasha Emberscale,” Sasha said, pulling his hand back to pat his chest.
Pam gave me a knowing glance of drama. “Oh I know who you are,” she said.
“Likewise; you are in my open physical hour,” he reminded her. “You are on the track team.”
“That’s right! It’s nice to finally, officially, meet you.”
Sasha raised his brow at her. “My friend has spoken of you,” he said offhand.
“What friend?” Pam asked, taken aback.
“Seth Fairbreeze, dragon of the wind.”
“Oh?” Pam said, her interest piqued. I didn’t know whether she knew who that was. But it intrigued both of us nonetheless.
“I will introduce you, of course, now that we are properly acquainted.”
“I can’t wait.” I knew she couldn’t.
Pam glanced back at her table and groaned. “Let’s get out of here. If I have to talk to Jonah any longer, I swear Imma strangle him.”
Sasha laughed heartily. “Very well. Let us depart this place to avoid attempted murder,” he joked.
“Why don’t you stick with us? We’re in the same course after this,” I suggested, gathering my items. I didn’t even hesitate asking him that. I’d done enough hesitating.
Sasha’s laugh tapered off into a quiet chuckle. “Of course. I would desire nothing more.”
I couldn’t hide my elation this time. Pam snickered at me. Thankfully he didn’t notice. I assumed.
Sasha draped his jacket across his arm, opting not to put it back on. Admittedly I enjoyed the view. He gestured for us to exit the class before him.
Every once in a while he would look down at me as we walked through the halls. I noticed his eyes following me.
I would sneak a glance at him when he wasn’t looking. It was apparent just how large he was now that I was walking right next to him. He was one of the only people in school taller than me. His shoulders were broad, arms thick. I know I was staring at the way they flexed as he moved. Couldn’t help but to.
Everything in me wanted to take that arm of his for my own. The thought of it being mine just felt so natural. I had to check myself a few times walking beside him.
It would be mine in time. That I promised myself.
—
We entered our Dragontongue class where I took a seat on his right at a table. Pam sat at mine.
Class with Sasha was much more interesting than ever before. He spoke freely and pleasantly, a stark contrast to the silent dragon he had been before I sat at his table in Dragonology. It was like something that had weighed on him had vanished.
I wasn’t unaware that he was happier since we had talked. I was pleased that it was me that had pulled him out of whatever darkness was holding him.
Again a pang of irritation ran through me. Why had I not introduced myself before? Just hearing the depth of his voice and the eloquence of his speech had me feeling some type of way. I could have been hearing that in my ears for weeks, those words of his carried on desert sands.
As class droned on, I saw that Sasha was appraising the professor with a raised brow as if too polite to allow complete disdain across his face.
He began to tell us about different Dragontongue dialects quietly, I suppose to keep himself occupied or distracted. I had to lean all the way in to hear his voice. It reverberated in my ears.
“If you were to say that word in the southern regions of Lyfax, it would mean to place bricks or stones atop each other as if building something. If you said that in the northeastern region, it means much the same, but doubles as a slang word meaning to fu— I am sorry, to have relations with someone.”
Pam squealed and covered her mouth. I covered mine too. I had wanted to hear the word ‘fuck’ come out of his polite mouth.
“Are you serious?” I asked instead.
“Yes, I am,” he said, brow raised. “Take care in who you say it to and in what context.”
Sasha tapped another paragraph “This term here. If you were to say it in the Northernmost tip of the country, it is basically calling someone a piece of filth in the wrong context, while just a few regions down it simply means to clean something without any further colloquial use. Their origins most likely started off with the same meaning and deviated as the people left and settled elsewhere. Knowing different dialects of Dragontongue in Lyfax is important. Linguistics interests me, as you can probably surmise.”
“Do you speak a lot of languages?” Pam asked.
“I occasionally travel for my work and interact with different dignitaries. I must know many languages and dialects at least at a rudimentary level.”
“Oh wow…” I said, truly impressed. Now that I had listened to his voice, I couldn’t place his accent. Unless deep was one. It wasn’t as if I was familiar with Lyfaxians’ manner of speech or various accents anyway. “What do you speak?” I asked
“Hmmmm. Common Lyfaxian. Common Lizardtongue. Dragontongue, of course; several dialects: fire, moon and wind. Many people know these. Shelltongue. Salamandra…one other.”
“Goodness,” I said in awe. I stashed away that “one other.” I’d ask about it later. I couldn’t imagine why it would be a secret. Hypocritically.
“My speech is not perfect in Shelltongue or Salamandra yet. But I can hold a conversation. I would enjoy learning and speaking your dialect of Dragontongue, as you mentioned earlier,” he remarked to me. Of course, Pam regarded me in shock. She gave me a chiding look, rightfully so.
Sasha didn’t miss her reaction. “If it is trouble, do not worry about it,” he said, frowning.
“No, It’s okay,” I reassured him. “I don’t mind.”
He was still uncertain, looking at Pam’s concerned face. “If I am to converse with a new group of dragons, I would prefer to know their dialect,” he whispered. “But not if it is cause for alarm. For some reason.”
Pam sighed in relief upon hearing him refer to me as a dragon. “Oh okay.”
“It’s fine. Complicated. I’ll tell you later,” I said, waving it all away. Sasha nodded.
“So did you all decide on a topic for your assignment?” Pam asked.
“Of course. We spoke much of it. I look forward to working with Leila.” Sasha said. I liked the way he said my name, the way he swung the vowels upward to where they needed to go. As it should be. “It will be interesting,” he said.
Pam glanced over to me. “How so?”
I looked amused, I’m sure. “Let’s say our Dragonology topic is about to be spicy,” I hinted.
“Sasha you’re a horrible influence already,” she accused, raising her brows at him.
“Of course,” he confirmed, chuckling deeply. “One needs a little corruption in the right direction, every once in a while.”
“Corruption? Oh really?” I said, regarding him in what I intended to be mock surprise. But I was genuinely shocked that he said it. He hadn’t corrupted me yet. He could try, but only when I was through with him.
Sasha chuckled silently. Just a trembling of the shoulders. A soft billow of scalding heat wafting across my face. Mmm, maybe sooner then.
Pam’s eyes widened, but she was beyond amused. If she could manifest a snack to observe our rapidly forming dynamic, she would have in a heartbeat.
She sat back, twirling her pencil. I knew she was about to start something. The twitch in the corner of her mouth was working. She was about to instigate her heart out. I groaned quietly.
“You know, Leila speaks all the same languages you do. She’s fluent in Shelltongue even; one of her best friends is Turtlefolk. She works at a place where a lot of people from different places come through. She took it upon herself to learn their languages.”
I groaned more.
“Is that so?” Sasha inquired, angling his body toward me. He sounded impressed.
I just rubbed my brows. I did not advertise my language skills. He looked at me with interest. “That is admirable. Why do you not wish to speak of it?” he asked.
“I don’t like puffing myself up. Drawing attention. Not that you are doing that,” I clarified.
Sasha smiled. “I know what you meant,” he said, speaking Shelltongue. I grinned. “I have been somewhat successful at not drawing attention—past my appearance at least—for a few weeks now.”
“Except your grades of course,” I pointed out in Shelltongue as well. “Literally perfect grades except two, and that’s only because of inaccuracies.”
Sasha raised his brow. “Ah, right, you have been keeping tabs on my marks. Very well; I have been under the radar except for my marks.”
“See? Y’all can speak tongues to each other in every flavor,” Pam said casually.
My mouth dropped. To say my eyes widened would be an understand. I shielded the side of my face.
Sasha choked and laughed quietly, holding his chest.
Never had she been that brazen. And she had said some crazy ass things for as long as I’d know her.
She looked so proud of herself.
“Pam, you are trying to start something, are you not?” Sasha guessed—back in Lizardtongue—looking away in laughter.
“Of course not. I don’t know what you mean,” she said, smirking.
I rubbed my face. “What were we even talking about?”
Sasha spoke as quietly as he could. “Different languages. Dialects. Things of that nature. Tongues, apparently,” he said, leaning toward me.
Really Sasha? I thought. He was something else.
He leaned back again and looked ahead, his smile dimming. “Also, things your professor apparently will not teach,” he said, the scales of his brows beginning to furrow.
“Yeah. It’s frustrating,” I agreed, uncovering my face.
“This class is testing my endurance. To hear my language butchered and be told that the proper way is incorrect is vexing.”
Pam stared at the professor, then at Sasha. “I’m sorry. This class is far beneath how you—and we—speak.”Pam and the rest of the Swiftwater Clan spoke to my family in the True way, the way of Sun Dragons.
Sasha leaned back. “And yet I have no choice but to be here,” he remarked. “And, apparently, neither do you both.”
It was a painful requirement, but a mandatory one. I nodded.
Pam turned back to the front of class. “You must be bored here at this university,” she said.
Sasha rubbed his chin. “Hmmmm,” he rumbled deeply. The vibration of that inquisitive hum made my shoulders tingle. I had to close my eyes and put a hand to my chest to halt my heart’s pounding.
“I was, yes,” he said slowly, “but yesterday was my last day of boredom. Today, the season has changed.” He glanced at me as he said it.
My mouth twitched into a smile. I found his choice of words particularly appealing. Pam looked curiously at him, but said nothing.
Sasha angled his body back toward me. I don’t know if I imagined it, but it felt like his whole existence was radiating heat now. It sent rush through my body.
“Let us return to our ‘lesson’ and pretend to care,” he suggested.
“Sasha,” I laughed, nudging his arm. It was hot to the touch. I was not imagining it.
“What?” he said innocently.
I shook my head at him, incredulous. I had no idea he was so funny. Who would have thought that sullen dragon was full of humor. He relented.
“I will behave myself,” he lied through his fanged teeth, patting his chest.
“Doubtful,” I returned, amused. It was easy to talk to him. Like we were old friends. Sasha was right: Pam had started something.
—
Sasha continued pointing out more language dialect rules and vocabulary from Lyfax. Things we couldn’t have learned on our own.
There were so many regions to learn about. I listened intently as he described them, and asked questions about everything. It was as if he was taking me on a mental tour of those far away places…
Before that day we hadn’t said a word to each other. Hadn’t shaken hands or anything. Whenever we had met eyes, we would quickly look away. I didn’t understand why we had done that. Now here we were hunched over a text book with our heads damn near touching. The heat of his breath warmed my face. It was hotter than earlier that day. Much hotter. No one was close enough to be bothered by it but Pam, and she did not seem to react to it.
And still I kept on gravitating closer. Because of how he had angled his body toward me, my left arm eventually pressed against his right.
My breathing stuttered, being in such close proximity to him. And I knew he felt it. He had to have felt it. Because I felt him tremble.
And there it was again! That strange rumble emanating from him, from his throat, I could now tell. Now that I was touching him, it was amplified, coursing through me. I tried to pinpoint its essence. It was very much like a growl, the crackling of a fire. And a hum; it reminded me of the way he responded to things without words. Hmmm.
All of it together was a magnetic song. I couldn’t help but listen. Let it lull me into a dream.
I wandered from the lesson for a moment to imagine what it would be like to just feel all of it pressed up against my chest. To embrace him and the heat he radiated.
I wanted to feel his fire whipping around me, not just the heat off him. To embrace a cascade of his flames. washing over me, engulfing me fully.
What would kissing Sasha be like? By the Goddess, the thought of drinking his fire until the persistent ice inside me melted was too tantalizing. If only I could just taste his breath inside my mouth… I wanted to look into his throat where I knew a flickering flame lie in wait. To explore it. Mmm.
It was like some deep ancestral memory was awakening. My breathing grew heavier. I swear to the goddess I heard his breath do the same. Except his breathing was punctuated by the rumbling crackle right under it. I knew he was in the same place I was.
I had to close my eyes and turn my head away from the heat coming off the words from his mouth. Because if I didn’t I would do something about it in that classroom—
“Leila?”
I emerged from my other world, his voice having shaken me from my daydream. I looked back to him.
“Class is over,” he rumbled into my ear quietly, the hotness washing over my neck and face. I rubbed those intense thoughts from my brows but they lingered everywhere else. I inhaled deeply and set about gathering my stuff. My hands shook.
Something hot brushed down my arm as he got up to gather his things. I looked down to see his claw drifting away from it. I thought it was an accident until he glanced at me. He smiled faintly though his brows were intense.
“Let us go,” he said gently, nodding toward the door.
“Okay,” I said, my eyebrow raising in interest. I slipped my bag over my shoulder. When he turned toward the door, I touched the trail of burning scales where he’d run his finger. When I say I could not breathe… I covered my mouth, then just rubbed my face with both hands. I didn’t know what to do. Mercy.
Looking around, my peers were also preparing to leave, so I composed myself the best I could and followed Sasha through the doorway.
—-
Dragontongue had been our last class of the day—”wow, you want that Dragontongue real bad huh?”Pam said— and it was time for us to part ways.
She chatted with Sasha, and I examined him while he was distracted.
I followed his gestures and mannerisms, wondering how he could weave such a spell over me that day. My behavior and my carefully curated facade were usually well under my control, perfected to give nothing away but pleasantness. But this dragon…
What I thought had been a perfect program was utterly interrupted. And the funny thing was, I wasn’t even mad at it. It was a break from the rigidity and monotony of my endless time at school. A break from my own reluctance to invite unknowns to myself, even those I desired. Like him.
For the first time in my life I thought ‘this is what the Sun must feel like to everyone else.’
From the moment I knew myself, my body had been cold. It was a point of contention between me, my parents and my Clan, all the Sun Clans. My mother was literally the leader of the Sun Dragons. And we, Sunscales, were Prime. Named directly after the Goddess.
People thought I was sickly. Anemic they called me. Even worse, some thought I was cursed. Most thought I wasn’t fit to be a leader in the future.
I did not let it stop me. I aimed for absolute perfection to stave off any doubt. Even at the expense of my own happiness sometimes.
My cold scales did not bother me. Although, at times, I wondered if I would be that way forever.
But now, I had felt Sasha’s warmth. This dragon had actually apologized in our first class for giving me the heat I never felt outside of putting my whole hand in a woodfire. It lingered in my scales as if they had drank it. They had awakened from a cold slumber.
I couldn’t go back.
I touched my arm that had been pressed against his, where his claw had grazed. Still hot to the touch. In fact everywhere he had breathed on, been near or looked at blazed. He had touched other things, shook hands with peers, finally, spoken to Pam, and none reacted as if he was exuding endless fire. Just me. Just for me.
“It has been a good day. You two have been so welcoming,” he said graciously. I was broken from my musings, realizing he was leaving. “I hope we continue to be friends during my time here.”
“For sure,” I said without hesitation, a little breathlessly. I didn’t want him to leave. He smiled warmly at me, almost in relief.
Pam smiled too. “Same,” she said. She began to rummage in her bag.
“It was nice to finally meet you,” he said softly to me. He put his hand out. I took it in mine. It was even hotter than before, unless I imagined it. I again put my other hand on top of his as if taking the warmth from it, to hold till later.
I don’t know what possessed me, but I let my thumb slide over the scales on the back of his hand. I didn’t even realize at first. But then I looked up and noticed Sasha was staring at me with his brow raised.
Gods, I could have died right there. Melted right into the floor and fallen into the void.
I almost pulled my hand in embarrassment, but he did not seem startled or upset. Instead Sasha placed his other hand atop mine. His face became intense for a moment, then softened. It seemed that neither of us wanted to let go. We did, though. The moment was brief, but it held much.
Pam, who had glanced up at us, had a barely concealed grin spreading over her face. She broke the spell that had drifted over us.
“Thank you for teaching us all that extra stuff about different dialects. I especially like that ridiculous word with the bricks,” she said, breaking the tense air.
Sasha shook his head as if clearing it. “Of course. I thought you might find that one amusing,” he said. He glanced at his phone, which had vibrated.
“You can lay your bricks on me anytime,” I mumbled to myself, still feeling the heaviness of that moment in my chest. I couldn’t help myself, saying that. I knew good and well it was provocative. I knew he might hear me. My mouth simply didn’t care. It was going to get me in trouble, I just knew it. I stared at my hand in wonder. It felt like fire had spread over it. What was he doing to me? Did he even realize that he was doing something? It didn’t seem like it.
In that same vein, Sasha didn’t say anything; he hadn’t been paying attention, I thought. Probably for the best. But then I heard him say something under his breath.
“Wow,” he whispered, silently laughing. I looked up at him. He covered his eyes, his shoulders shaking.
“Oh shit,” I said, covering my eyes as well.
Pam looked up. “What?” she asked, startled.
Sasha tried his best to keep a straight face, but it was impossible. He just laughed aloud then, a laugh that shook me to the core.
“Shut up,” I said, also laughing. I shielded my face in my hand as if I could hide from the embarrassment.
“I have said nothing,” he pointed out, his hands up.
“Please, please, let’s pretend I didn’t just say that shit,” I pleaded with him.
Pam’s eyes widened. “Oh my gods, what?”
“I will not say, Pam, yet I will never forget it,” Sasha said, smiling widely.
“What?” I replied, shocked.
“I will never forget it,” he repeated.
“By the Goddess Sasha. Are you serious?”
Sasha rubbed his eyes, still chuckling occasionally. “I am. Would you, if you were in my position?”
“Oh my gods,” I said weakly, still covering the side of my face.
Sasha patted his hand on his chest. “Gods, truly I needed today, desperately. It is no trouble to me, that you have said this. Certainly not. Unfortunately, I have a meeting to attend to, but we will discuss this permanent memory later, Leila Sunscale,” he said.
“Yeah, I bet,” I groaned, my voice shakey. I covered my face more. I was out of my mind, surely.
I heard Sasha begin to walk away, but his footsteps slowed. He hesitated, I guessed.
“Leila, do you have plans today?" he asked.
I looked up. He was looking at me expectantly. I couldn’t even say anything. I was still reeling from my ridiculous blunder. Now he wanted to see me! “What? I… umm—“
“No she doesn’t have plans,” Pam spoke up. Bless her.
Sasha smiled. “Perhaps we can speak of our project. I will find you later this evening as long as you are outside. I apologize for my abrupt departure but I must go.”
“Okay, cool,” I said. I rubbed my forehead.
He walked to the exit and looked back at me. “Perhaps we can build something later; I am not a bad mason, Leila Sunscale,” he said, chin raised. My mouth dropped. This dragon…
He let out a deep laugh and left. I watched him disappear through the doors of the hall, then followed him out. I saw a flash of red turn a corner into another building, vanishing from my sight.
"No he didn’t," I said in disbelief. "Did you hear what he just said?" I asked incredulously, gesturing toward his exit.
“What the hells did you say Leila?”
“I may have said a little something about bricks under my breath but his ass heard me. My gods.”
“Are you serious? Girrrrl," Pam said, shaking her head. “The gall on you.”
"Why did I say that? I must be crazy." I placed my hand over my forehead. Hot.
"I mean, he liked it," Pam said. "He thought it was funny. See, no harm done. If anything it sounds like Sasha has some business with you Leila," she teased.
I rubbed my face. I couldn't believe that I had run my mouth like that. In the other hand, I was pleased to have been so reckless. It had led me down this path. My scales prickled despite my embarrassment. Why should I feel bad now? He took my accidental flirtations as an invitation. And wasn’t that what I wanted?
Pam’s demeanor softened.
“Hey, for weeks you’ve been talking about how attracted you are to him. He turned out to be super nice, and he has a sense of humor, too. I like him. Fate is smiling on you again.”
"You sound like my mother," I noted.
“That's 'cause she's always right, isn’t she?" Pam pointed out, brow raised.
“Fine… She is,” I conceded. She would have said those words. In truth I had heard her say them many times.
Resigned to my fate, I stepped into the quad with Pan. I walked into a shaft of sunlight and sat on the bench it spilled onto, the Sun’s rays warming me. I closed my eyes against them, basking.
“I may as well go study while I wait for him. I can’t believe this is happening,” I remarked.
“Well believe it. Your bricklayer is seeing you today,” Pam teased.
“Pam, for real?” I remarked, opening my eyes.
“What? Come on. We can both go study.” Pam hugged me. She looked puzzled though.
“Leila. You feel hot. You never run hot. You’re not having a stroke are you?” she asked, alarmed.
“No. That’s just because he sat next to me the whole day,” I revealed. And breathed on me, leaned on me… I shut my eyes, wishing I had lied.
Pam nodded, not noticing my apprehension. “Oh okay. That makes sense. We did just get out of class. I didn’t know fire dragons were like that just idly,” she mused. “Let’s get on out of here.”
I wanted to tell her what I really felt. But I was sure it would sound crazy. Maybe I would after I met him and spoke to him. Privately.

We walked together through the courtyard. I glanced through the windows of various buildings looking for red scales moving in the halls. I saw nothing, of course.
We ended up going to the library. The room was large and made of ironwood. Small nooks with tables were tucked away amongst large shelves full of tomes.
We chose a table with a window next to it.
I studied as attentively as I could, trying to occupy my mind. But I could not stop seeing Sasha in my vision. Pam gave up trying to get me to engage in conversations with her. Instead I studied for the assignment in Dragonology on my laptop, and daydreamed.
—
“It’s getting late. You don’t know when Sasha will be looking for you.” Pam said, shaking me from my focus.
The light from the windows had waned somewhat, giving way to the Sun readying for slumber.
“Oh, right. I was deep into this essay here. I wish I had borrowed his books and saved my eyes,” I said, rubbing them.
Pam yawned as we packed our things, hefting her bag up. “I’m going to head home. Tell me how everything goes. Tell me if y’all build a house!”
“Pam!” I gasped. “Oh my gods.”
“Love you! Bye!” Pam called, rushing off.
—
I strolled around the grounds reading a book, looking up at the Sun every once in a while. But I didn’t spot Sasha anywhere. I hoped that I had not missed him. I had studied a bit longer than I intended.
Eventually I sat on a bench to wait. I would wait until dusk settled. And if he didn’t show I would see him the following day. It was not as if we had exchanged our numbers.
I pulled out my notebook full of writings, poetry, doodles. It was just one volume from a collection of filled books over the duration of my life, where I pressed flowers of my heart through its pages.
Before I could put pen to paper, I paused.
I put away my old faithful journal and pulled out a new one in deep red. It was not a coincidence by any stretch. I had stared at it on the shelves of an art store until I gave in and bought it.
I hadn’t written one thing in it since. After all, I hadn’t known him, and didn’t want to write only about his appearance. I wanted to know what he was made of. Now, having met Sasha, the red book was begging for ink.
So I let myself fall into a rhythm. So many elements of Sasha had revealed themselves to me that day: this dragon’s voice, his heat, his mannerisms. The words he said, the way he said them, his sense of humor hidden under all that seriousness.
I searched my brain and gathered up all my own words, sifted through them. I wrote a few things here and there, but nothing like what I wanted.
I looked up toward the Sun for some bit of inspiration, and my breath caught. A red form flew in front of it, wings beating. Seeing Sasha framed in that circle of fire was more than I could have hoped for. I stared up at him flying until he stopped, scanning for something.
The moment of inspiration I had been searching for was right there. I spoke aloud what I had and wrote it as swiftly as my claws could move:
“A dragon in a Circle. An Inferno wrapped in the Sun A scarlet vision framed in fire A cloud of embers in the Goddess’s hands She Holds all of him out toward me The gift of a flame within a flame “
I dropped my pen and covered my mouth in embarrassment. “Oh my gods what am I writing?” I asked myself. I stared at the words.
I turned my head to read them as if a new perspective would make them less mortifying.
“Hmm,” I muttered. “Needs some work but…’A flame within a flame.’ That’s some good shit.”
I looked back up. Sasha’s gaze swept over me then away. I waved my arm up at him, bangles jangling, hoping he saw me so he wouldn’t be looking all around all day.
When Sasha looked back in my direction he stopped where he was. He descended slowly until he locked eyes with me. My heart pounded again. It was driving me up the wall, the anxiety. Or rather anticipation. I pressed my hand to my chest watching him grow closer. His wings were huge, blocking out the Sun.
I had been staring at Sasha from a distance since he had arrived, his very first day. He was imposing, the way he had entered my classes, but exceptionally polite. I had been silently competing with him since laying eyes on his grades.
Now the distance was finally closed after my nervousness had kept me away. I folded my notebook shut and stood as Sasha landed with a woosh of air.
I looked upon him not as a mysterious figure in the back of class but as a new friend. More. I couldn’t help but smile when he straightened his already straight clothes as he moved toward me.
He smiled right back at me, chin raised.
“Leila,” he said.
“Sasha. Hey,” I replied.
“So,” he said, “you spoke of bricks earlier,” he teased.
My mouth dropped again. This dragon…
“You aren’t letting that go are you?” I asked.
“Never. Even if nothing ever came of it, I would never forget.”
“By the gods,” I muttered.
“I am not complaining,” he clarified.
My eyes widened. Then it occurred to me that he had insinuated something would come of it. Goddess, I felt my own fire sweep across my cheeks. I was so flustered I covered my mouth with the heel of my palm letting my claws settle over my cheek. I couldn’t stop the motion fast enough.
Sasha laughed good naturedly. Sweetly, even. “I will stop teasing. For now,” he said.
“For now?” I repeated past my palm.
“For now.”
I lowered my hand. “You are a trip, do you know that?” I said, raising my eyebrow. Even though I had been nervous, actually talking to him made me feel like meeting all his words head on.
He gestured for me to walk beside him without answering. I did. I almost took his arm again, so I clutched my notebook to my chest to keep my hands in check. We didn’t say much as we walked along the quad together.
Some students were staring at us as we walked. I suppose we made quite the pair together.
“It appears we are a bit of a spectacle,” he muttered to himself curiously, agreeing with my thoughts.
I couldn’t help stealing glances at him every once in a while.
His posture was impecable. He held his left hand behind his back. The other lingered in front of his chest as if ready for something. I didn’t know how else to describe it. It was interesting, that pose; deliberate. I saw that he had rings on his fingers as well. I had not noticed them before. They were red like his scales, rough hewn. The overall pose made him seem so stately.
I couldn’t quite describe his expression. It was both intense and peaceful all at once.
He caught me staring one time, though. He was looking right at me when I peeked. I turned away and put a hand to my face. I hoisted up my bag.
“Here,” he said.
I turned back. “Here what?” I asked.
He put his hand out to me, gesturing toward my bag. I stopped walking.
“Oh. Okay. Such a gentleman,” I said, a smile playing on my face, impressed. He chuckled to himself, accepting my compliment.
I slipped my bag from my shoulder, and he took it to hold on his elbow. We started walking again. I didn’t care after that; I looked at him openly, a little bit enamored.
‘Ok Mr. Sasha Emberscale. I see you,’ I thought.
PART 2