Free list of baby blanket sayings

Dave Ramsey

2008.06.26 18:58 Dave Ramsey

If you're following Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps or just want to gain a better understanding of the Total Money Makeover, Financial Peace, and personal finance in general, then this is the community for you!
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2009.11.30 07:50 Support and knowledge about breastfeeding

**This is a community to encourage, support, and educate parents nursing babies/children through their breastfeeding journey. Partners seeking advice and support are also welcome here.**
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2012.12.10 18:08 astrologue Ask Astrologers

A community for asking questions about your birth chart or astrology in general. When asking about yourself, INCLUDE YOUR CHART FROM ASTRO-SEEK.COM and your question must be specific, either about a planet, sign, aspect or house in your chart, or things like a transit, profection or progression, or a particular area of life. Put your question in your post title.
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2024.05.19 06:13 Revolutionary-Oil-22 Starting to resent my best friend

my best friend who i’ve been friends with for 10+ years in the entire time we’ve been friends she’s always had a boyfriend not the same one but I don’t think she’s ever been single for more than a month at a time since 2017. we’ve always been very close and would often go out together or just hang out. she met her current boyfriend about 2 months ago and he’s her first boyfriend that’s actually got his life together with a good job and a house. she still lives at home and because of this she has spent every single day there since they met. she introduced him to her family 2 days after meeting him and they’ve already talked about her moving in. I understand some people say “when you know you know” and he is genuinely a good guy but it’s like she’s fallen off the face of the earth. we used to talk almost every day and now a whole week will go by before we even exchange casual conversation. since meeting him every time I ask her to hang out or do something she says she already made plans with him and i’ve asked several times for different hours and days.
the final straw for me was that we had made plans to attend a sporting event and she said she would handle getting the tickets for us. it was supposed to be me, her and her boyfriend which I didn’t mind at all. a few days go by and I don’t hear from her about the tickets so I texted her to ask her how much I owed her and she responded and said that someone had actually given her two tickets for free and so she had given the other one to her boyfriend, essentially meaning I could no longer go unless I wanted to buy my own ticket and sit alone. This was something we had talked about going to before she even started dating him two months ago. I haven’t really spoken to her since because I don’t know how to bring up that I feel like she’s being a bad friend. I also found out after the fact that there were more than two tickets. She just chose to give the other two she had been given to his friends and lied to me about it.
I don’t know how to talk to her about it, but I really feel like I’m starting to resent her. She’s done this before where she’ll get a boyfriend and essentially cut off all of her friends and then once they break up, she wants to spend every minute of every day together and it’s really just kind of exhausting.
submitted by Revolutionary-Oil-22 to TwoXChromosomes [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:12 Adept_Huckleberry_40 Moved for my bf of 4 years f24 and m24 should I breakup with him?

My boyfriend and I have been dating throughout college and now into post-grad. I loved our relationship so much but now that I have moved to his hometown I feel like it has torn us apart. It’s not like he’s just hanging out with friends here without me. Mutually we have nobody here but he does live with his parents. It’s just he works during the day and I work nights. whenever I’m free I have to rest because I am so damn tired but he likes to go out and do activities. He seems to prefer being with his family and I am just here so alone. I have no friends. No family. Nobody. I am the kinda person that can usually make it through because I know everything is temporary. I haven’t had a panic attack in a very very long time but I’ve lived here for 9 months and I feel less and less connected everyday. This sounds pathetic but I feel like I have to beg to be hungout with. I have had many hardships in my life with family especially, abuse and manipulation etc. I feel uncomfortable showing how I feel because whenever I tell him something going on at work or family he just sits there and doesn’t say anything. Sometimes I pour my heart out and it’s like a brick wall. I’ve come to terms with a lot of my life but once I had asked him if he had ever considered how it felt to be me. And I got “no.” I love him to death but I just don’t get how we can connect on all other levels but he can’t put himself in someone else’s shoes. Especially looking to become a doctor, I just don’t see how a lack of empathy can workout. Does anyone else have experience with this? He is such a great guy this is just so hard for me right now
submitted by Adept_Huckleberry_40 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:11 Lonely_Law1602 UofT Language Research Day—Hybrid & Open to All!

Some might say language is a fairly concrete term. Others may say it’s a nebulous thing with multiple pathways for exploration. We’ve invited some such minds to the University of Toronto’s third annual Language Research Day. Our presenters come from across North America, and various disciplines such as psychology, speech language pathology, neuroscience, sociology, and more!

Amongst these presenters are our two keynote speakers: Dr. Craig Chambers & Dr. Naomi Nagy. Dr. Chambers’ research focuses on the real-time interpretation of spoken and written language and he will be speaking about the interplay between linguistic and non-linguistic cognition. Dr. Nagy’s research analyzes language variation and change in linguistic contact contexts, with a focus on some of Toronto’s heritage languages across generations. She will be speaking to us regarding variations and paths of change in heritage Russian.

And we would like to invite you to join us for this free, hybrid event held at the University of Toronto St. George Campus on June 3rd, 2024. This interdisciplinary conference is open to all, regardless of affiliation with the University of Toronto.

Please join us for a day of exploration and community-building, as well as the possibility of a few free goodies by signing up here: https://register.oxfordabstracts.com/event/50815?preview=false
https://preview.redd.it/aumk2pr96b1d1.png?width=1545&format=png&auto=webp&s=ac37d39b2eaa373b12a9f16b68e1c9d62b9d0369
https://preview.redd.it/w2io4pr96b1d1.png?width=1545&format=png&auto=webp&s=b16f7138a3f64534644c4fbadd79949f18b7138b
submitted by Lonely_Law1602 to uwaterloo [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:10 letsjam88 Still have medicaid coverage, despite being over the income limit (NC)

I don't understand how I still have Medicaid coverage despite making over the income limit. I live in NC and never spoke to anyone about recertification. I've been receiving letters saying I have coverage, a doctor has been chosen for me, and a plan has been selected.
I qualified for Medicaid last year but never used it because I got a job used my job's health insurance plan.
I thought they went by my income, which they have, I filed taxes each year, and I made over the monthly income the entire time during the recertification period.
NC has this new EPASS account that I can't access because my account is broken. When I've called the number to get help, either no one picks up or they give me different phone numbers that circle back around to people who can't help me.
My initial case worker was not helpful and didn't answer my questions or provide guidance. The NC website isn't helpful, many pages I try to go do are either broken or have no information. And there's rarely a number that works or leads to anyone I can speak to. I was the phone once for 2 hours trying to get answers but go the run around.
My concern is if I'll be penalized for some reason. I never used the insurance once while I was on it. I didn't register a card or an account. The only thing I did once getting coverage was logging into the marketplace to choose one of the insurance companies they listed.
submitted by letsjam88 to Medicaid [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:09 provegana69 So why does PureDark seem to get a pass while every other mod author is (rightfully) condemned for paywalling their mods?

If you are part of the Skyrim modding scene on PC and you haven't been living under a rock, you've probably heard of PureDark and his mods which drastically improve performance. However, the free, public version is incompatible with ENB which is usually one of the biggest performance hogs in a modlist. But, on his Patreon, you can find a version compatible with ENB that would no doubt solve the performance issues of many users.
And from what I have seen, there seems to be nothing but glowing praise for him. You will often find people recommend you join his Patreon to get the mod. I always found this weird and hypocritical. Literally every other mod author get condemned for doing the same thing that he is doing while he gets nothing but praise. There are some people who say that he will release the ENB version in the future because "the current versions are just test builds". However, this is highly unlikely as he no doubt gets a large sum of money from his Patreon from people wanting the ENB version of his Upscaler mod.
So I ask you, why should PureDark receive a pass while every other mod author gets condemned for doing the same thing he is doing? No mod can be wonderful enough to justify paywalling it permanently.
submitted by provegana69 to skyrimmods [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:09 Independent-Ad-5793 [US][SELLING] MANGA LOT

I'm just unloading some of my collection. Please feel free to send offers or ask to bundle. I will only sell as a full set. Please do not ask to split. I ship with Media Mail, so those will be the shipping prices that I use.
Here is a list of what I have for sale (list price does not include shipping)
Dr Stone 1-23 G4 $140
Akira Box Set G3 (Box has a dented, see pictures) $120
Fist of the North Star 1-10 G4 $130
Demon Slayer 1-23 G4 $140
Blade of the Immortal 1-4 G4, 3,4 are still wrapped $100
https://imgur.com/a/UaZN3rT
submitted by Independent-Ad-5793 to mangaswap [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:07 No-Preference6624 Narcissism or Weaponized Incompetence?

As a writer, I have a conflicted relationship with commissions, but you’re here for the tea. Sorry if this is jumbled, but the client is an amalgamation of every bad commissioner that you have ever read about or that you may have worked for.
First, they ordered a writing commission, but during the first 5000 words they were surprised there was “too much” writing and reading. I told them from the start the first draft would be better off as a script so I could easily adapt into a novel, a D&D homebrew or whatever they desired. They originally had 60 PAGES of characters, but I have cut it down to 31 pages (so far). I gave them three simple ‘homework’ tasks to gather all the information I needed for the three parts of this commission. A plot summary (in bullet points) which took them four months because they insisted on writing it like a novel. The list of characters took six months (they are going back to remake EVERY character reference because it took them so long that the early references are out of date) and they fought me with every character we cut and they still haven’t sent me examples of how they want the D&D homebrew to be formatted. They say they have no idea what to look for as they knew nothing about D&D, but they blew me off for two years playing a D&D game with other friends using a D&D Beyond account ( I do not support Wizards of the Coast). For context, the bullet points took me 2 pages and 2 voice calls with the commissioner to summarize and the list of character names took 3 days and 3 voice calls to compile on Google Doc and move to Trello. What about my plan to script? He INSISTED that I, an expert in my field, should write the novel while he worked with a ‘friend’ of his on the D&D homebrew. Why would he need a script? He didn’t WANT a script.
Only a few weeks later, he ran back to me after being blown off by said ‘friend’, with the genius idea of having me write a script, novel and homebrew. His card is always empty whenever he pays for the next part of the commission because he spends it on $400 sketches and junk food. He refuses to listen when I say he doesn’t need 300+ characters. One of the stories he is plagiarizing is mine. My novel only has 27 characters (including a canine). We will be celebrating the 16 month anniversary of the commission by the time this is posted. He has nine days to finish the characters before I cancel. I’d rather live in my car again. Two hours ago he LITERALLY just made a FULL bio (in the description) with five full body outfits for a character that was deleted. He spent a month adding a shine texture to an npc's tiddies.
After making me wait for 16 months, he has the AUDACITY to get angry at me when I was offline for an emergency and I could only make one of our two commission vcs. Now he’s using the deaths of friend(s) caused by recent global tensions to ADD more characters. Why do you NEED to keep your brother’s ocs? To kill them? Delete them! This psycho has a history of making fictional versions of people who he perceives as having wronged him to kill and/or torture them graphically. Do you really need an entire MONTH? You won’t recycle two characters (that don’t belong to your brother) to fit VITAL roles but you proceed to make two random characters FROM SCRATCH that have nothing to do with those roles. Or last month I asked him for a list of 8 damage modifiers (8 digits) he replied in 12 minutes. This task previously took him an ENTIRE month because he was ‘busy’ with maps (in reality he was blowing up on a ‘friend’ who turned down his art commission on Discord and watching videos). This client is too lazy to browse with Google but he deliberately makes changes in complex organization software to disobey me. I am going to die before this torture ends! Would I be the a–hole if I put a stop to this nightmare?
It’s happening! Finished or not, the commission ends on my birthday (May 24). I am sick or getting “Okay.” every time I ask him a question about his commission.
Just when I thought I was in the clear, he drops a D&D manual of dice rolling, resting and training mechanics, skill trees and a point buy system he has NEVER mentioned predating these 16 months; all the way back to when we met (2012). He does this the week that I am “finishing” the commission. Did I mention that he has “accidently” erased the maps through his own bad habits. ARGGHH! He’s got until Monday. I don’t care if he pays me one last time. I can’t live like this.
FREEEEEEEEEEEDOM! After 16 months and two weeks.
Since I had writer’s block and another traditional art friend was suffering from art block we decided to remake some of each other's characters in our styles. The subject of this post got excited to join us. What kind of a--holes would we be if we gate kept something this trivial? I remade nine of the subject of this post's characters in my style (in two days). We both use the same program for the same amount of years, but we have developed wildly different styles. Will I ever learn? He spent the whole stream telling me their sweaters were wrong, he disliked the ribbon in one of the girl’s hair because it was too big, asking why do all of the girls have the same stockings (while wearing school uniforms) and why they do not have the exact same skin tones (despite me using the eyedroppecolour picker to show him the neon colours (one background character has eight colours in their hair) he chose in his style does not work with my duller, minimalist palette. Did you ask for me to copy your style or use my own style? After they were done, he listed all of his (multiple) issues with them like nine college essays. I can take criticism, but I had to force one compliment (one word per character) out of him. His criticisms regarded me adapting elements from the references that HE sent me. 90% was negative and 10% positive. Naturally the subject of this post still has not even thought about which character of mine he'd like to remake, but even professionals cannot unravel the web of things this person has done to avoid me even in situations when I am the center of the conversation/activity. I was unsure where to post this since this rant is a bit of most subreddits that I enjoy. Thank you for reading! I have mountains of experiences to share from freelancing and I will have many more in the future.
submitted by No-Preference6624 to EntitledPeople [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:07 Intrepid_Reason8906 Real estate companies that lose $100 million in a year and claim they will be "profitable" someday. Why would anyone buy and hold their stock and lose their money? Can't they see it's a money grab?

There are real estate brokerages in America that lose around $50m - $100 million a year. I won't name any names, but I think many know who they are. They get money from the big institutions to poach agents from other offices by giving them $25,000 bonuses, billboards etc and capsize the local brokerages who work hard and are not able to sustain losses. They have massive shiny offices in big city centers where "baristas will fix your computer" and "free car washes for life" and all of these other silly gimmicks that contribute to their hundreds of millions of dollars in yearly losses.
They claim "We'll be profitable soon, we're getting closer to profitability. We're disrupting the market, we're a tech company blah blah blah". Then, they lose another $80 million in a quarter. Then their stock goes from $20 to $3.
There's one company for instance that lost around $1 BILLION in just 2 years, and some of that was during the "Good times" of 2021.
Their CEO's and top owners end up making millions a year, giving themselves $5 million bonuses, $25m in equity in a year etc. If you look up what the CEO's of these companies make, it's unbelievable.
But the retail investors lose a fortune as the stocks slide from say $20 to $3.
Their cheerleaders say "Oh don't worry, they are a TECH company and they are gong to be profitable soon".
Let's say for math's sake, they do become profitable. Even though industry splits are changing and things are changing, but let's say they somehow make $50 million profit instead of $100 million losses. Even if this were the case, it would take 20 years to make up for the lost $1 BILLION. Are they really going to scramble hard these next 20 years to make up for that $1 BILLION lost in about 2 years (while they continue to post mega losses).
A lot of the agents are drinking the Kool Aid too.
Meanwhile, there are more and more of these companies coming out, racing to the bottom.
I'd be really shocked if these companies really do plan to be profitable. It seems like a money grab for their upper echelon and the poor retail investors get burnt while being sold a dream.
submitted by Intrepid_Reason8906 to realtors [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:07 editorksqupl FreeTaxUsa Promo Code for May 2024

Follow this link for FreeTaxUsa Promo Code for May 2024. Access the latest deals and promotions by visiting the link, featuring a constantly updated list of coupons, promo codes, and discounts.
submitted by editorksqupl to DiscountMaximal [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:04 Ssneaksneak Is my fiance [36 M] cheating on me [30F]? I need an outside perspective with my situation...is he a liar or his he telling the truth?

Yesterday I punched in my fiance’s [36 M] passcode to his apple watch. I [30 F] understand how that was not the right thing to do. I discovered many sexual pictures and texts between a woman I don’t know and him. When he came home that afternoon, he asked me what was wrong. I proceeded to ask him “why would you do this to me?” and explained what I had seen. He was visibly shaking and started assuring me that he would never ever cheat on me. He said that I’m the only woman he has never wanted to cheat on. To back up his argument, he proceeded to scroll endlessly looking for an article that could prove it was a new iPhone update that would that made those appear. I understand the glitch made some user’s deleted photos visible again, but text threads? I didn’t find anything about that. He spent the rest of his day trying to cheer me up. Offering to buy me expensive things, finally willing to pull the trigger on getting a new puppy…ect ect.
Now, he has changed his apple watch password. He also spoke to me saying “I can’t believe you would think I would ever be capable of doing that to you” “I can’t believe you don’t trust me after everything I do for you.” I listed off some of his lies he was caught telling me before. “but this is totally different” was his response.
If he wasn’t guilty and was telling the truth, why would he be shaking life a leaf, changing passwords, be upset about me not trusting him…
I want to believe him. But I also know him. He’s a smart man who bends the truth often. But he can also be the most loving man I’ve ever met. I’m so torn…we've been together for 5 years.
Any advice would be welcomed. I have no one else that I can talk this out with. Thank you.
submitted by Ssneaksneak to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:03 friedwateronastick What's the best way to teach someone how to play League of Legends?

For context, my girlfriend has told me a couple of times before that she's wanted to try out the game so that we could play together. She only brought it up again recently cause we were both playing Valorant one night and hovered over League in the client.
I've verbally expressed to her a couple times as well that it'd take some time to get used to the "feel" of the game since she has no prior knowledge nor experience to MOBA's/RTS games so to speak.
For additional context, I've only reached Emerald this split, maybe low Diamond if I'll really push it. I don't know about you but there's only so much I could do, not that I'm saying I don't have any confidence in my abilities as a player.
My girlfriend on the other hand did tell me how she wanted to be a support player since she's always taken a liking to heal/tank/peel playstyles, I guess you could say she's a good observer haha. But (and this is a big but) I personally don't think support is a great place to learn the game especially if you wanna get good at it. You're free to correct me if you hold a different opinion of course.
I'm not opposed to the idea of us playing together and I'd really love if we did. I think it'd bring us closer since we always spend our free time together, what better than playing video games?
What do you guys think? I don't particularly have any experience having to teach or even mentor someone in the game. I've only ever thought about having to teach her movement controls, switching up her keybinds, getting her used to unlocked cam.
Any and all help is appreciated, perhaps there are coaches here on this subreddit that could give me some advice? Thank you!!
submitted by friedwateronastick to leagueoflegends [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:02 CryptographerLost407 I’m just going to say I’m tired.

Because I’m tired of the same conversations and nothing changing. I’m tired of getting my hopes up when he gets his shit together for a week before reverting back. I’m tired of hearing “but what about meee?”
I’m tired of working 2 jobs and managing the household. I’m tired of sacrificing my needs and happiness for the sake of my husband. I’m tired of the effort I’ve put into our relationship, our house, and getting our son to this point not being seen. I’m tired of being followed around the house by 2 boys when I’ve only given birth to one.
I’m absolutely happy to give every free moment I have to my son and push away my needs for him… but not the grown ass man I call my husband. Not anymore.
Next time he asks what’s wrong… I’m just going to say “I’m tired.”
….note, we are in couples and individual therapy, this is just a vent. And I’ve told him this all verbatim, many times. I’m done telling him.
submitted by CryptographerLost407 to Mommit [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:02 Direct-Caterpillar77 His mistress made him a better husband. I feel nauseous. (New Update)

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Wide-Area-6779
His mistress made him a better husband. I feel nauseous.
Ongoing
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
Thanks to u/queenlegolas for suggesting this BoRU
TRIGGER WARNING: emotional infidelity, physical assault, verbal abuse, manipulation
Original Post Nov 22, 2023
This is a throwaway. I’m just nauseous and want to vent please let me do it here?
Everything changed about 3 years ago and my husband became my dream man. Before that, we suffered a lot in our marriage. After 2 hard pregnancies and PPD my libido was diminished and we fought all the time. After 4 years of dead bedroom we started therapy. I thought that was where the improvement came from.
My husband started paying attention to me. In the beginning I was panicking because whenever he paid me attention before he expected sex but now it felt like he was seeing me as a human being for the first time. He was attentive and caring. Emphatic. He touched and cuddled and kissed me out of the blue, without wanting sex in return. He started helping around the house, bringing me flowers, take out dinners when I work late, planning date nights. Anniversaries, birthdays and holidays are planned perfectly and I started getting the most beautiful and thoughtful gifts. When we fought, he would come the next day and admitted his wrongs and very accurately (if he was the one in the wrong) something he never did before. He would apologize too when back in the days him apologizing would be a blow to his ego. He said he was happy all the time and lucky to have us as his family. Everything was better and I even got my libido back if not as high as I hoped.
I found their conversation about 5 days ago and I have probably spent over 50 hours reading them. 3 years worth of conversation. He would tell her his woes and she would listen. 99 out of 100 times she sided with me. She taught him about intimacy and how important it is in marriages. The tragically funny part is that he never got angry or offended by her telling him off. Calling him silly, stubborn or at times man baby. Her honesty was brutal and yet he agreed with her. She was the one suggesting all the changes and he would ask her for advice about gifts, traveling and all the beautiful things he did for our family.
He thanks her all the time for helping him turn his miserable home life around, making it tolerable. With all these texts there were the texts between them that are about them like nobody else existed around them. The flirting, sextalk and pictures. The longing to see each other.
He says she is the love of his life every day and that he wishes their circumstances were different. She says the same. They both agree that divorce would ruin their families and that they couldn’t be that selfish. how admirable!
I feel nauseous. My happiness for the past three years was fake. I don’t know what to do. I want to hurt them. I want to expose them and I want to ruin whatever they think is perfect happiness
Hi!
I’m getting chat requests about my comments not being visible. Is this normal? I’m trying to answer you guys. Sorry
Hi again
Since I can’t comment and I can’t answer all the chats I will answer here
I am 35. My husband is 39 we have two children 9&7
She is 40 and she has one child 14. She is in a dead bedroom with her husband too and for 14 years.
The affair is physical too yes but they meet maybe once every month or every other month. She tells my husband that what they feel is probably limerence but that they don’t know it yet because they meet so little. She lives in another city
RELEVANT COMMENTS
So basically your cheating ex is trying to blame you for him cheating. The delusion of cheaters.
You only informed the mistress's husband that she couldn't keep her legs closed to a cold breeze.
He had a right to know. Onwards and upwards.
UpdateMe
OOP
He didn’t blame me for anything. He doesn’t care that he cheated. He was only angry that her husband hurt her and her child.
Maybe my post was this convoluted that everyone here is thinking he is trying to put the blame in me? He doesn’t care at all. He just thought that I should have confronted him instead because he was the one who cheated on me.
I told everyone around us what he done and he doesn’t even care
Update - My husband left me after I told his mistress’s husband about their affair. March 19, 2024
I was here some weeks ago, with my original post. I finally decided that I really should reach out to the husband of my husband’s mistress. I found him easily and I contacted him. He didn’t believe me at first and was rude about it and told me to go f myself. I hesitated to contact him again to be honest but after a few days I realized that I would too not believe a stranger just popping in my dms accusing my SO of cheating so I recorded my husband’s phone with my phone. Especially the messages where she’s sent explicit photos and stuff. I also went to the contact to show the number. He didn’t answer me the first day then he called me the c-word and blocked me. I thought well then, I have done my part and it’s on him if he believed me or not. Then after a week my husband came home angry and he yelled at me for exposing them. He asked me why I didn’t confront him instead, my problem was with him. I have never seen him yell like this then he packed a bag and left for about a week. I think he’s traveled to her.
When he got home he said that it was over. He said that he has been trying to make me happy for years and he’s done everything a good husband would do but still, nothing was good enough for me. I’ve made him miserable for years and instead of taking it out on him, I chose to hurt a woman and her child. He moved to his parents house and now he’s renting an apartment I have heard that he travels the weeks he doesn’t have the children to be with her and that she’s moving here soon when she gets full custody of her child.
I have not been feeling well at all. He has never spoken to me directly since he left and I haven’t seen him. He adamantly refuses to talk to me. Like I never existed in his life. I don’t know what I have done to deserve this treatment. I hate that they won.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
List-and-dumbfound
The last 3 years of your marriage were a lie. You know that now. Who he is the person he treated you before his affair partner had to convince him to be good to you. He is not a good person.
Do they even really know each other? Like how it is to be around each other on a daily basis. They are genuinely dumb to think the list will stay with 3 kids around plus handling chores and day to day things of life. They have 2 custody battles ahead of them and divorced on top of it.
If he’s angry with you the next time you have to see him, ask him why? He got what he wanted. He wanted to be with her and now he is. So why is he angry that you gave him what you wanted.
It’s probably shame that he’s painted to be a cheater. Not he can’t manipulate the narrative and paint you as the bad person.
If what they won is each other? Let them have each other. They are both awful people so they deserve each other
OOP
He is not angry about the divorce. He is angry I told the husband instead of him because the husband hurt her and her kid
DrNefariousMcFarious
He’s not angry bc of that, he always assumed that if you found out he could gaslight you into thinking that it was somehow your fault or not happening, but by you telling the other husband, there was no getting around it.
OOP
No he is angry about me putting his AP in danger.. he gives zero fucks about staying in our marriage or not. He only was with me to help raise the children and probably wait for her to get rid of her husband. I am not trying to he dramatic here but the soon I realize the truth the better is is for me to move on I think
I want full custody of my children after he went and beat up his mistress’s husband within an inch of his life and ended up in jail. Mar 22, 2024
This morning I got a call from my mother in law that my husband has been in jail for the past couple of days and only got out this morning but the charges weren’t dropped. Apparently his mistress and her husband had another altercation last weekend and she ended up hurt again.
Now I want full custody of my children. He is out but charges are not dropped so it will probably lead to some punishment. I don’t know if family court would count this in case I want full custody and supervised visits. My mother in law was hostile when I told her this and she’s one of the people who have supported me so I am expecting some push back. I don’t care.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
inquiryreport
You probably should not have let your MIL in on this idea. Her first reaction is going to be that it will threaten her ability to see the grand kids and her son’s ability to be a father. Even if you think she is on your team have to assume she isn’t.
OOP
Yeah it was a big mistake

NEW UPDATE

He celebrated Mother’s Day with his mistress and her son May 12, 2024
Thank you so much for staying in touch and I am so sorry that I cannot answer your dms. I haven’t been active on Reddit and I have received tens of dms every day since my posts. I have been trying to adjust to life as a single mother. It is hard and especially the weeks I don’t have my children. Unfortunately, I could not convince court to give me sole custody even with my husband’s pending legal issues due to him not having any priors. He however succeeded to limit my family’s access citing parental alienation. I am not allowed my children around my family without supervision (MIL). All of this actions are temporary however until we get a court date. He is refusing to meet or talk to me for any reason besides texting about the children.
He is not in jail (for those who are asking) he has no priors so he is out. He will probably not be getting any jail time either but rather parole. Anyway, his mistress has secretly recorded some of the abuse she was getting from her husband and she has sole custody of their child now. She has moved to our city and she and her child are living with my MIL. Yes, MIL and from what I have gathered, she lives with my husband on the days I have the children.
Today I was out with my children and my friend and her children to have mother’s day brunch. I was the happiest I been for months because I got a bouquet of flowers and chocolate that is signed from my children (worlds best mom) and I knew that it was from my husband. Anyway when we arrived to the restaurant, there he was with his mistress and her child. They were celebrating mother’s day too. Her son was sitting between them and she had gift papers and flowers all around her on the table. I froze and wanted to leave but he came and apologized and said that he didn’t mean for this. She was crying and hugging her son. I wanted to faint because my children were so excited to see him and wanted to go inside and eat brunch with their dad. He told our children that it was mommy’s day then he asked me if I wanted her to leave so the children can have lunch with both of us. I just left with the children and took them to McDonald’s instead. He sent me a long text saying how sorry he was and how he wished that he loved me as much as I deserved and that he wished me to find love soon. He doesn’t regret our marriage and hope I don’t either because we got our beautiful children out of it that we need to raise and to not punish them because of what he did. Please let us not let our resentment of each other to spill out on our children. Let us promise to keep them happy and loved. Let us not use them as pawns. I asked him what I lacked that she has. A question that have been living rent free inside my head He said to stop this. This is futile. I insisted and I called him and he answered for the first time in months. I told him I wanted to know. No matter how harsh the truth was I can’t live without knowing. He said Mothing. I lacked nothing and she is not better in any way. He just loves her and loves himself when he is with her. He feels real and genuine happiness with her that he never felt in his entire life. I hang up and he texted I am sorry. This is the truth you asked for. You are not less than. You lack nothing. Please let us give our children the good life they deserve. Don’t hurt them to hurt me
I don’t know what I have done in my previous life to deserve this. The way he was with her. He never looked at me that way not even when we first met. I don’t know how to stop thinking about them. It is in my brain all day. I want full custody of my children and I will fight for it as much as I can. She will never be their step mother. Her custody is not finalized either and hopefully she will have to move back to her city so her husband can have visitation rights and she is out of my life. If my husband wants to move to be with her. My children stay with me.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
OOP told to be careful around the husband, and asked what his mother thinks
Well I am not stupid and he can record me all he wants because I was very calm and I genuinely agree that the children come first. Even her child tbh. But I know that she only had emergency custody of hers because of the assault but I know the rules here and she will probably need to move back soon because her husband has right to meet his son. In that case my husband can move away but he can’t have custody because I want a stable home for them. I don’t know why I am getting hate in my dms calling me vindictive.
I am very grateful to you and others who are mentioning that she is coaching him to say things. Of course! How stupid was I not to figure this out. From not talking to me for a second to being all nice and begging me to forgive him and to keep it amicable? Of course it is her. Even mother’s day flowers was probably from her.
MIL is very devastated about what happened and she visits me every day even when the children aren’t home. She said that she had to take her in until she gets her own place. No she is not allowed to meet the children and it is already decided and MIL is making sure this is not the case. I understand that MIL chooses her son but she hasn’t given up on me.
I have talked a lot with mom about what happened and no she doesn’t feel guilty. She said that it was different (of course it is🙄) hers was real love and dad’s ex was very abusive. I don’t know, I don’t believe in karma or anything but she said that she at least understands now how dad’s ex felt. I feel anger because some people win and some lose and I still love him very much. I regret exposing what happened. At least I could have had 4 more years together. And the children would have been a bit older. I regret so much things that I have done in a moment of grief and anger
OOP When told to be careful what she puts in text messages and once again be weary of the mistress
Thanks. I have been very careful about texting because as I am keeping all the evidence, I am counting on him doing that too. About his mistress, it is less “evil” than that because I was wrong about her recording the abuse. She stole the surveillance her husband had installed around their house to spy on her. MIL told me this today. She is probably hoping for full custody but I know the rules here and he will have right to see his son no matter so the c-word will have to move back sooner or later.
Only them I will be asking for full custody if my husband moves with her to her city because I don’t want a part time father to my children who shows up whenever he pleases. I want stability. He is either a father or not
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7
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2024.05.19 06:02 Choice_Evidence1983 AITA for not having my boyfriend be a plus one at my best friends wedding

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/ImDyingRn123
Originally posted to AITAH
AITA for not having my boyfriend be a plus one at my best friends wedding
Thanks to u/queenlegolas and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for suggesting this BoRU
Trigger Warnings: manipulation
Original Post: May 9, 2024
I (25f) have been seeing my now boyfriend (27m), who will call Joe, for about six months now. We made it official three months into dating so I like to say he’s only officially been my boyfriend for three months.
My best friend, who we’ll call Anne, is getting married next month. I’m one of her bridesmaids. It’s a small destination wedding, only about forty close friends and family. The bridal party is set to arrive about four days before the actual wedding to do bachelobachelorette stuff.
The issue came up yesterday morning when my boyfriend started asking what time my flight was for the wedding week. I didn’t think much of it and told him. He came back about ten minutes later and said he’d have to go on a different flight because he couldn’t find one on the same airline or at the same time.
I didn’t understand why he was looking at flights. I asked him if he was planning on going on a solo or guys trip while I was gone since I wouldn’t be around.
He looked confused and then said he was looking for flights for the wedding.
I then proceeded to tell him, trying to be as gentle as possible, that I wasn’t planning on a plus one and the guest list was already finalized. He has only ever met Anne over face time since she lives in a different state from us.
After telling him, he exploded at me. Honestly it was a total 180 from his usual behavior. He said it was insensitive of me to not ask for a plus one because we’d been together for so long now. That I was purposefully excluding him and trying to keep him a secret. He ranted and talked in a circle and I just sat there in shock. What snapped me out of the daze was when he insinuated that I would likely cheat with one of the groomsmen.
Thats when I got up, got my shit, and started walking out of his place. He freaked out even more and said we needed to talk about this and I couldn’t walk out on him. He tried to grab me twice but I shoved him off.
Since I last night, I haven’t spoken to him. he’s been blowing up my phone with calls and texts that I don’t reply to. Even put him on do not disturb because it was so annoying. I was pretty solid in believing I wasn’t TA but one of his best friends got my number and texted me I was being petty and a female dog about everything. That I lead Joe on for six months.
I haven’t talked to anyone about this since I wanted to cool down before I got a second opinion. But now that his friend is texting men, I feel like I handled it all poorly. I know I need space right now but I don’t want to ghost Joe, which his friend implied I’m now doing.
So I’ve come here to get some unbiased opinions. Fellow redditors, I asked you now if i am TA for not having my boyfriend be a plus one to my best friends wedding.
posting this is the other aita sub too
edit: to clarify. we don’t live together. i just spend the night at his place sometimes
edit 2: in our last conversation last night i texted him that i needed some space to breathe to which he then just kept calling and texting
edit 3 because people keep acting like joe is a secret: he has met my other friends. he hasn’t met anne in person because she lives in a different state. across the country to be exact. they’ve only met through face time. i’ve met his parents and friends. he hasn’t met mine because they moved back to mexico two years ago. he has met them over face time.
edit 4: his friend saying lead him on was “leading him to believe he was invited”
AITAH has no consensus bot, OOP was NTA
Relevant Comments
OOP to multiple comments on why she is not having her boyfriend as her plus one to the wedding
OOP: i accepted the wedding invite long before we met. this wedding invite didn’t just recently happen. + main reason for why i never asked for a plus one is because joe and i had only just started seeing each other when the wedding was being planned. a lot went into it because it’s a destination wedding in europe + i’m not meaning to dismiss it. i’m pointing out that’s why i’m not having a plus one unlike the other groomsmen and bridesmaids. they have been with their partners for years and personally know anne. joe has only ever met her over face time + also there’s a lot more then just buying a ticket. i said earlier that this wedding was planned months before we met. anne planned a lot of things for this wedding that are catered to the fact there’s a limited guest list. again. i would have been fine to explain all this but again. i never got a chance to + this wedding wasn’t a secret. he was even aware of it when we first started seeing each other because i’d just done dress shopping. again. this wedding was very planned out because it is indeed, very small and private in france. he’s also met anne and her fiance over face time, not in person because she’s in a different state. he’s met my other friends as well. he hasn’t met my parents because they live in a different country.
 
Update: May 11, 2024
The general consensus was that I wasn’t TA. Unfortunately the original post got taken down on the main aita sub but is still up on the other. Still posting the update on both though.
Some of y’all had some stuff to say about me saying I need help communicating because I shouldn’t have walked out. Have your opinions, but never let someone scream at you and just sit there and take it. Im realizing thats emotional abuse.
About why I never pushed to have a plus one. When the wedding planning was starting, Joe and I had not met. By the time we met and made things official, the wedding planning was finalized. I never hid the wedding from Joe or the fact it was very small. Someone said “most normal people” plan on bringing their s/o to a wedding. Maybe thats true. But never automatically assume that since your s/o is invited to something, you’ll be going too.
The wedding was heavily pre-planned because again, it’s a destination wedding. Anne is originally from France and primary reason why it’s a destination wedding.
I talked to Anne about this shortly after posting and she agreed that I’m not TA. She said if the roles were reversed, she’d never expect her so of less than a year be invited to an important event.
So, on Friday, I texted Joe asking to meet up Saturday morning to have a discussion about everything.
This morning he tried to get us to meet at my place, but instead, I got him to agree to meet at a local cafe. A lot of you brought up how he tried to grab me and that’s a big sign that he could get more physical in the future. I didn’t want anything to be left to chance.
He got there early and tried to hug me, which I didn’t allow. I got the ick at the thought of him hugging me.
We did a bit of small talk but got pretty much to the point once we sat down.
He did apologize for blowing up but in the same breath said I shouldn’t have left. I countered that he shouldn’t have tried to physically stop me from leaving, twice. He said what else was he supposed to do. That set the tone for the whole conversation.
He went on to say that me just walking away was a “clear indication that I didn’t respect him”. I then pointed out that he was not letting me explain why he wasn’t invited.
This is when we started talking in circles. I told him how the wedding was being planned long before we met. How by the time we mutually agreed to be exclusive, they had everything finalized, especially the guest list. He said I should’ve asked for Anne to change it anyway. I asked him if I ever gave him the impression he’d be attending. He was silent for a while and then admitted he just assumed that since he was now my boyfriend, I would have told Anne to invite me. I told him then wouldn’t I have said something if he was invited in the past three months?
I realized that we weren’t getting anywhere. I told him I wanted to break up. To paraphrase, I said something along the lines of.
“I understand you were hurt that I didn’t invite you. I am sorry that we didn’t have a clearer conversation. I do wish that we could have had a calmer conversation. However, I don’t feel safe in this relationship because of how you reacted. I don’t think this relationship is good for either of us if you feel betrayed and I feel unsafe.”
He didn’t take that well.
Joe’s response was if we broke up, I wasn’t getting my stuff back. I told him I didn’t care. Because honestly? If he wants to keep some of my underwear and used toothbrush, okay.
I then asked him to not have his friends text me too. He then went from pleading to have another chance to accusing me of never wanting him. I just stood up, told him I wished him the best, and left.
Ended up going for a two hour run when I got home because I still felt stressed. Blocked his number, his friends, blocked his instagram, deleted the pictures of us on my feed. Changed my Facebook status to single. Had a cry and have been watching Netflix since.
Something I learned from this your first fight with your partner tells you everything about them. Our first fight told me Joe was explosive. Maybe if he hadn’t blown up, we would still be together. Not gonna dwell on it though. I know it’s good I got out while you can because as a lot of you pointed out, the fact he kept trying to overpower me twice says a lot.
I’m honestly glad I broke it off. As some of you said, it took him six months to show his true colors. Can’t imagine if he did come and then a year later, I find out he’s like this and have to look at wedding photos with a guy who is fine blowing up.
I’m going to stay single for awhile now. I have a wedding to look forward to. My focus is on supporting Anne and making sure she has the best wedding ever. I may update when the wedding happens to let you guys know how it goes and if Joe tried anything else.
Thank you again to everyone for their opinions.
Relevant Comments
OOP on staying away from her ex-boyfriend
OOP: thank you ❤️ i do have a dog and a roommate so that’s some extra security already. the roommate and i talked before about getting a ring camera but this experience and other comments have solidified us getting one
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

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2024.05.19 06:02 LucyAriaRose AITAH For telling my stepdaughter she is welcome to go live with her mother full time because I won't get rid of my Harry Potter themed bookcase?

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/JazzlikeOriginal358. They posted in AmItheAsshole
Trigger Warning: discussions of transphobia
Mood Spoiler: moving in a positive direction
Original Post: March 22, 2024
I'm having a bit of family drama and need a reality check about if I am being unreasonable here. I really need the perspective of LGBT+ sensitive individuals because the drama surrounds transphobia perpetrated by JK Rowling.
My step daughter is going through a pretty tough time. The last couple years have been really rough on her. She has been dealing with bullying at school, being held back a year, not getting along with her mom's new husband, self harm and identity issues. Lots of questioning of her sexuality and gender. (We have been working on getting her a good mental health team of doctors and therapists to help her navigate all of this, please know we aren't throwing her to the wolves or internet to deal with it all herself).
I've been in her life since she was 7. We've always had a pretty good, though not terribly close, relationship. I have not taken on a parental role, but have always tried to make myself available for her.
Until last year, her mom had primary custody and her dad had weekends with alternating holidays. Last year due to the issues with her school and mom's house, my stepdaughter requested that custody arrangements be changed.
Since she came to live with my husband and I full time, there has been quite a bit of friction between the two of us. One of the biggest points of contention is my Harry Potter fandom, particularly "The Bookcase", and my supposed transphobia (due to my apparently "wrong" stance when it comes to the politics regarding trans issues in our country)
I grew up in the hayday. So many of my childhood and teen memories are tied to the franchise. My friends and I were all really into it. We attend midnight book releases, dressed up in costume for movie releases, threw HP themed parties when we wanted to hang out, etc. In many ways it shaped the course of my entire life, those same friends and I joined our high school's botany club because herbology. That unlocked a lifelong passion of mine and my career is working with plants.
Over the years I've collected quite a bit of memorabilia, many of which are gifts, and they have always been displayed on my most prized possession. A monstrously large custom bookcase my grandfather, a former woodworker, built for me when I was a teenager. I love this thing. The shelves are live edge black walnut slabs. All around the casing my grandpa carved beautiful HP themed imagery. Owls, cauldrons, shooting stars, lightning bolts, an adorable little rat at the bottom and nibble marks from said rat, etc. It's both sentimental and valuable (the slabs of walnut for the shelves alone would be pushing a grand, let alone attempting to value the hand carved craftmanship). The bookcase has always been proudly displayed in my home. It currently lives in our living room.
During one of our family therapy sessions, my stepdaughter expressed that seeing my HP shelf made her feel really uncomfortable because of the author and that she was really disappointed in me and her father for being so supportive of a biggot. I apologized for making her feel uncomfortable in her own home, and said that I would take down the HP stuff.
So I packed up all the HP themed merch off the shelves. Made sure I didn't have the books or anything on display that said "Harry Potter" anywhere. I bought some LED grow lights and converted the bookcase into a plant shelf to display succulents. I bought some witchy, but not overtly harry potter, themed pots for the little guys so they'd go with the shelf.
This was not an acceptable compromise for my stepdaughter and has remained a point of contention. With my stepdaughter hurling that I/we (referring to my husband) broke a promise by saying we would get rid of the Harry Potter stuff. I tried to explain to my stepdaughter that, while I do not agree with JK Rowling's political stance at all, the media has a special place in my heart because of my childhood association with it and that the shelf was very important to me because it was a gift from my grandpa, but she maintains that none of that should matter because in 2024 it is nothing but a symbol of transphobia and hate.
At first my husband was supportive of me and my desire to keep my bookcase, but lately the arguments are wearing on him and he asked me if I would reconsider keeping it in the living room. Suggesting we rent a storage unit to house it in.
After the most recent blow up about it, I kinda lost my temper. I didn't yell or anything, but I did very firmly tell my stepdaughter that this is my home and my bookshelf stays. If it is such a big problem for her, she can always go back to live with her mother.
I knew it was a low blow pretty much as soon as I said it. I quickly apologized but it was out there. My stepdaughter has been on an emotional downward spiral.
My husband and I have been arguing almost nonstop. I think it is mostly stress because he is at his wits end with how to help his daughter but he is becoming pretty mean and nasty towards me. Telling me to "grow up and just get rid of the fucking bookcase"
I know I was a dick for saying my stepdaughter could always go back to live with her mom (and I suspect that will be the main topic at hand in our next family therapy session).
But am I really being unreasonable in wanting to keep my beloved bookcase?
EDIT: Thank you everyone. Honestly. Thank you for those who shared their insight and advice and thank you to the people who have asked me hard questions that made me think. Especially those who asked what matters more, a bookcase or a/my child?
I've been reflecting really hard on what my bookcase means to me an why it is so important. I'm hitting some deep truths I don't think I was ready to recognize about how I really feel about my relationship with my step daughter.
All in all I think we just need to shelf things until our next therapy session. (I'll see myself out...)
Relevant Comments:
Commenter: Can you temporarily put it in storage until she’s off to college, then take it back out? That way it will be safe, and everyone can take a deep breath and calm down a little.
OOP: I looked into storage units when my husband suggested it, for the size and climate/humidity control we would need it would cost us approximately $7,500 to store my shelf until she goes to college.
It's cost prohibitive.
Commenter: Why can't you just move the bookcase into the primary bedroom?
OOP: It's 7' x 4' x 1', made of solid wood, and we have a L shaped stair case.
The only way it is going upstairs is if it is completely dismantled and rebuilt. I don't have the skills, knowledge or tools to do that and hiring out a task like that is cost prohibitive especially because it would have to be done again when moving the bookcase back out.
Commenter: NTA. You need to put that bookcase in a room with locks, because your husband is going sell it or damage it.
OOP: My husband isn't an emotionally unstable monster. I don't believe he would ever do anything like that to me. I wouldn't have married him if he was that kind of person.
(to another commenter): I have absolutely zero concern about my husband doing anything to it. He isn't that kind of person. He is incredibly stressed out about all of this and has said shitty things in anger but this isn't some tv show where he and my stepdaughter are going to have daddy and daughter bonding time with a sledge hammer.
Commenter: I think he was just frustrated and worried about his daughter. Hopefully you can talk it out with him and he will apologize for the "grow up" comment.
OOP: That is my impression in regards to him too.
I can't imagine how hard it must be to see your child suffering and not being able to fix that pain.
I've been doing my best to give him grace due to the circumstances.
It is something we will address when he has the spoons to do so.
Commenter: One question: who owns or rents the house you are living in? If it is yours you can suggest that your husband move out and get a place of his own to his daughter liking
OOP: My husband and I purchased it together. We are both on the mortgage.
Commenter: Then time to figure out who stays, who goes, and how the equity...if any...is split.
OOP: I don't intend to divorce my husband and throw away a decade plus long relationship because he said one shitty thing to me during a period of great stress for him.
Commenter: If he destroys the bookcase to show solidarity with his daughter, what will you do?
OOP: Have him pink slipped.
That is not the action of a reasonable adult. I would be very concerned for his mental state.
Commenter: I wonder if she made similar unreasonable demands in her mother’s home or at school that lead you to the conflict there?
OOP: Part of the issues with her homelife with her mother involved my step daughter demanding that her mother choose between her now husband and her because mom's husband's political views.
So, this isn't exactly left field behavior.
Commenter: Your stepdaughter needs a massive reality check and probably different therapists.
OOP: oof. We are on our 5th
More on therapy:
Yes. She meets with a psychiatrist as well as her therapists.
(to a different commenter) We are in family counseling already. Couple's counseling is likely to happen if there isn't a resolution to this current bookcase issue in the very near future.
Commenter: Info needed: what is your ‘wrong stance’ when it comes to trans issues?
OOP: I'm kinda middle of the road when it comes to the trans political issues, and mostly take the stance of "I don't know, I have my own feelings about the issues but as it is not my area of expertise I am not beholden to them and I will leave these big problems up to the people who have made learning about them their focus of study"
Like, I get my feathers ruffled when medically uneducated politicians try to interfere with any kind of health care. Like seriously ruffled.
I believe that people facing gender identity issues should have free and easy access to health care and therapy to navigate those issues.
I believe that society in general should strive to use preferred pronouns if only as a matter of politeness.
But when it comes to things like trans people in sports or having afab only "safe spaces" - I see both sides of the argument and refer back to my "I think this should be left up to the people who focus on this and not form a super strong opinion either way based on my lay opinion"
OOP is voted NTA
Update Post: May 12, 2024 (1.5 months later)
Some one asked if I could update this situation, and I'll try my best to summarize the past several weeks.
My husband and I spoke about the situation. He apologized for being snappish with me, and agreed that SD was being unreasonable about the bookcase. He ultimately agreed to back me about it. He and I are just as tight as we ever have been.
I once again apologized to my SD for the remark I said out of frustration about her moving back with her mom. I reiterated that our home is her home too and she is always welcome here. That even though families sometimes fight and disagree we ARE family.
But the general argument about HP, JK Rowling, and my bookcase continued to escalate for a couple weeks. And then the discontent about that started to bleed over into complaints about me. She started to be more disrespectful and sarcastic.
During all of this we were still attending our family therapy sessions. Our therapist was pretty certain that the misbehavior was anxiety related and didn't suggest that we give in to the demands to have the bookcase removed and wanted to just keep working on the things we all have been.
Well, SD's disrespectful attitude hit a climax. She called me the c word and some other choice things within my husband's ear shot. My husband honestly kinda lost it on her. I don't think I have EVER seen him that angry before. He was bright red and vein popping angry as he marched her to her room and declared "YOU WILL NOT SPEAK TO MY WIFE IN SUCH A WAY".
This was probably the first time my SD had ever seen her dad angry, let alone anger directed at her. It left her pretty shook. Like that was her rock bottom. We ended up needing to do a couple emergency session with her counselor because there was concern about her relapsing with some self-destructive issues she has been working on.
But that incident lead to us having a break through. Her counselor invited my husband and I into one of her sessions, and she had a bit of a break down. Basically she was dealing with a lot of existential dread and a lot of fear due to politics and it being an election year.
That ended up being an excellent opening for us to bond. This is gonna sound silly but I was able to pull up my social media timelines back from 2016 and I showed her some of the things I had written or had shared with me back then.
She was able to see that I shared a lot of the same fears that she has.
So we have all had some really big talks about things like feeling helpless when things are out of your control, about disengaging from the media machine for your own mental health, etc.
Things have been on the upswing since then. Before she left for her mom's this past weekend she even gave me a mother's day gift. An adorable little planter that says Caution: Mandrakes.
I love it. I put one of my favorite props in it and it is front and center on the bookcase now.
Relevant Comments:
To a downvoted commenter:
your continued support of JK Rowling through fandom will likely be an issue for other LGBT people in your life
The only other LGBT person in my life sent me bertie botts every flavor beans in my christmas package this past year...
Commenter: This poor girl is terrified of being kicked out from another set of abusive parents and is forcing herself to buy merchandise to support someone who wants her dead to make her stepparent happy. This update is horrifying, for real.
OOP: Hope you stretched before this reach.
SD was not kicked out of her mom's home. That was a choice she made. She is in no danger of being kicked out of our home either.
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2024.05.19 06:02 karenvideoeditor The Zoo [Part 8]

First / Previous

Suzanne thought it was absolutely brilliant of me to put books on a flash drive for Sun. She explained that Sun wasn’t as sophant (her word, not mine) as she might seem, more of a repository of information, but she was fairly intelligent. It was how she was able to connect Andrew being in pain to the fact that I was friends with Andrew, and that I would want to know that he was in trouble. Apparently some of Sun’s species had given some ‘wisdom’ to others in the past and it had made its way into mythology.
The key fact was that she was not smart enough to protect herself and her kind from the clever, organized poachers. With that information in mind, it was fascinating for me to think of how Sun took in and organized what she learned. It was almost as if she was a walking, talking library.
On the topic of tours, my first one went wonderfully, and I’m almost hoping Suzanne lets me do more of them. I know not all the tourists are going to be as awesome as these people were, but Suzanne gave me a lot of slack when it comes to dealing with them. She actually said that being a smartass is not grounds for dismissal, and that if I’m sarcastic or facetious to guests who are being ‘daft’ and they complain, she really doesn’t care. Is this the perfect job for me or what?
There were four guests in this party, two adults who were sisters and two children of one of the women, brothers aged thirteen and seventeen. The tour was a birthday gift for the older of the boys from his aunt, since apparently he was passionate about animal protection and conservation.
When they arrived at the front gate, I was sitting at Andrew’s desk, going over the booklet of information one last time. When the visitors pressed the button that sounded the alert buzzer, I tucked away in a drawer and let them in. I did have a cheat sheet with information about the animals on my phone just in case, a brief notation of each of them and which enclosure they were in, but I really didn’t need to use it.
Exiting through the front door, I saw them walk up the path toward me. “Hi, I’m Ripley,” I said, holding out a hand toward the woman closest to me.
She shook it firmly. “I’m Denise. This is my sister Carla and my nephews, Wesley and Jason,” she said, motioning to each of them in turn.
“I heard it’s your birthday,” I said to Wesley, giving him a smile. “You’re interested in animal conversation?”
“Back where we live, yeah,” he said, nodding. “The animals that you’ve got here are incredible. I can’t wait to see them.”
“Well, I can’t wait to show them to you,” I said. “Right this way.”
I led them on the path around the building, toward enclosure one. Despite the horrific memories of the animal killing Stanley’s friends, I knew it was just an animal, and I had to push past my feelings on what had happened. Keeping a small smile on my face, I motioned to the enclosure. “Fiercely territorial and amazing hunters, despite their large size, they’re arboreal and known to dart from tree to tree with barely a sound. This is one of only about two thousand left in existence.”
“Two thousand, three hundred and fifty six at last count,” spoke Wesley, his eyes on the trees.
I blinked, surprised and impressed. “Well that was fantastic. Do you plan on stealing my job when you graduate?”
Wesley looked at me with a grin. “Nah, everyone knows Suzanne only offers humans this gig. And I want to help animals like this one get off the endangered species list. The zoos are great for awareness and fundraising, but then the money has to go somewhere. I want to be doing the real work.”
“That’s really great,” I told him. “I wish you all the best in that career path.” At that, we saw the animal climb down from the tree, wandering a few yards from the tree line. This was because 90% of the time, when humans were at their enclosure and making noise, whether it was speaking to each other or calling out to the animal, it was someone bringing them prey to eat. Or, in my case, enrichment toys to play with.
“Whoa,” Wesley whispered.
“How close can we get?” spoke up Jason.
“The warding starts at the fence,” I told him with a small gesture. “So, just there.”
Both boys wandered closer and I glanced at their parents. It seemed that Suzanne’s zoo had a serious reputation for high quality invisible walls, because they didn’t look worried in the slightest about the boys being hurt or killed.
“They prefer dense forest as their home and have been known to make their nests in trees up to twenty meter in the air,” I continued. “And when hunting, they’ve been seen dropping eight meters straight down. They have incredibly dense yet flexible musculature, which allows them to tackle their prey without injuring themselves.”
There was more information about the animal that I continued to rattle off, though Wesley chimed in at certain points with the info I was about to convey. That was highly entertaining and very cool. When I’d been in school, I’d never met anyone who had my level of passion about endangered animals. I wondered if things were better where these folks came from, but realized that considering there were so few of these animals left, I guessed not.
The animal paced a little bit, seemingly waiting to see if we were the kind of humans that came bearing food, before deciding we weren’t and climbing back up into the trees as easily as I would climb some stairs.
As we moved onto enclosure two, Jason spoke up. “Are there any animals here we can touch or feed or something?”
I sighed inwardly before slowing to a stop. “Well, can you show me your hands?” Jason looked bemused, holding out his hands. “I mean…they both look like they’re in great shape. You can stand to lose one.”
The two women chuckled and Wesley smirked as Jason shoved his hands into his pockets. “Very funny.”
Grinning, I started walking again. “The animals here are all carnivores and all predators. You get to see them, but that’s it.”
“Alright.”
When we reached enclosure two, I started on my next spiel. “We’ve got three reanimated dead in this enclosure,” I spoke. They were just coming out from the trees as we arrived, presumably having heard our approach. “Marissa, Connor, and Bradley. They were donated by families who knew where they would be exhibited. Their next of kin, whoever they are, can’t stand the idea of putting them down. But we need to make sure they don’t have access to corpses, because one of them plus one corpse equals two of them.”
“They eat flesh though, don’t they?” Wesley asked.
I nodded. “Oh, yeah, but it’s from bodies that have already been dismembered. There’s no chance of them being affected by the transformation because it’s all parts.”
“Oh, got it.”
The creatures with blueish-white skin had superhuman strength, which is why they qualified for the security of Suzanne’s zoo. They also were likely the source of any Earth tales of people being brought back to life as zombies, specifically draugr, according to my research. They smelled like rotting flesh, so even as I kept talking about them and giving a background to the people they used to be, we were quick to move on once Wesley had gotten a good, long look at them.
“Enclosure four’s animal is a vampiric spirit. He’s a small, hairy humanoid creature with pointed ears. He wears a hat, and if he somehow loses it, he freaks out,” I said.
“They eat horses,” Wesley noted. “Also anything that gives them the chance to sit on it, usually catching them by surprise while they’re sleeping.”
The creature came out from the brush, giving us a suspicious look. He wasn’t in his humanoid form though; for some reason, he’d chosen to shapeshift to a dog.
I nodded. “Yep, indeed. Once the prey is dead, then he’ll eat it, and he has a voracious appetite. We have two wolves and two bears in the forest, which is one of the reasons I’ve got some self-defense items,” I said, patting my belt where my pepper spray (rated for bear) and my taser. “But the wards keep them out of this area of the zoo, so it’s really not much of a worry. It’s also a known shapeshifter, preferring the form of a dog, as you can see, as well as a cat, a snake, or even white butterflies, though the last one is rare.”
“The white butterflies are supposed to be a sign of good luck,” Wesley said, glancing to me. “Too bad we got the dog.”
“Yeah, otherwise you might be able to talk your mom into getting scratch-offs on your way home, huh?”
Wesley smirked at me.
The next enclosure was Spike, and he was waiting for us, dripping wet from having just emerged from the lake. I gave the introductory information about him, which included his propensity for eating animal eyes, nails, and teeth. “Recently, I’ve given him some enrichment activities, and I learned he likes artichokes, pecans, and hazelnuts,” I said, taking a bag out from my cargo shorts. “Wesley, do you want to toss this bag into the enclosure?”
The boy’s eyes widened and he nodded excitedly. He took a look into the paper bag before wrapping down the top to make sure nothing would fly out. Then he chucked it underhand past the fence. It landed a few yards from Spike, who waddled over to it quickly and tearing the bag open, spilling out the prizes inside. As the animal ate the pecans and hazelnuts, Wesley asked, “How’d you figure out he likes those?”
“It’s not all about taste,” I told him. “It’s mainly the difficulty of getting them out of the shells. He’s used to having to work for the parts of his prey he likes the most, so this mimics that activity, and he enjoys the process. I tried a bunch of different foods to find a few he liked.”
“Cool,” Wesley murmured, staring at him.
We watched Spike eat until he’d finished and then he went back into the woods, leaving us to move onto enclosure five. Japanese camellia were plentiful here, a type of pink flower, and that was because they grew anywhere near one of his species made their den. “This girl spends most of her time in the lake also,” I said, as the creature made its way toward the fence separating us from it. “But as you can see, she’s just as curious as the rest about what we’re doing here and whether we have food for her. She eats fish mostly, but she also regularly gets live prey.”
This creature was a spider-like monster, having six legs with long claws on each, and the head of an ox with two sharp horns. She was capable of shapeshifting to look like a human, but I guessed that she wasn’t fond of it, since I hadn’t yet seen her in that form.
“She prefers the easy way of catching prey, so to speak, by hiding in the lake and pouncing when something comes for a drink of water,” I explained. “Apparently humans are some of her favorite prey. She has an advantage of being able to spit poison, which often hits her prey in the eyes. But it’s usually used in defense rather than offense, since it secretes a limited amount.”
“What kind of animal would even go after something like this?” Jason asked, staring at her.
“Never discount one of its own species when you’re thinking about what might attack an animal,” I replied. “There are places that are breeding all of the animals here, but competition for mates is common. That means an advantage in a fight, like poison or venom, can make or break who the winner is.”
“Ah, gotcha.”
“It can’t spit past the warding, right?” Carla suddenly asked.
“Oh, no,” I assured her. “We’re fine. The wards wouldn’t let anything cross over.” She nodded, appeased.
The animal in enclosure six was the ginormous seal-hippo, Fiona, and she was looking at us as if she was imagining sprinkling us with herbs and spices and stuffing us in an oven. “This girl is one animal I’m going to work on enrichment activities for next,” I told them. “She prefers to feed on crayfish, though she’s happy to eat any humans that wander into her territory. She’ll even make a sound like a baby crying to reel us in. I’ve heard it a bunch of times.”
“Can you get her to make the sound?” Jason asked, perking up.
I grinned. “Not on command, sorry.”
“What enrichment are you thinking of trying?” Wesley asked.
“Possibly food placed in puzzle feeders,” I told him, “since she has claws that are pretty dexterous. Maybe a piñata made out of newspaper with flour inside, or a scarecrow that mimics a human.”
“Awesome,” he muttered.
After a little more educational tidbits, we moved onto Yui’s enclosure. “What is that?” Wesley asked, smiling.
“I got Yui the closest thing I could to a ping-pong ball,” I replied. “She quite likes it.”
“That’s so funny,” he said as she came out of the trees in her spider form. “I mean, the idea of her being a bloodthirsty hunter who seduces men to their deaths and eats them alive, but then on the other hand, she likes playing with something like this.”
“It is a little funny,” I agreed. “But when it comes down to it, all the animals here enjoy activities besides hunting.”
“She can shapeshift to look human, right?” asked Jason, trying to be casual about knowing something factual like his nerdy brother.
I nodded. “She looks like a woman from a region of Earth called Japan. And she’ll use strategies like holding out a hand to shake to get you closer. She tried that on me when I first got here but, as you can see,” I said, holding up my hands and waving them, “I didn’t fall for it.”
The boys both laughed as they got closer to the fence, watching her slowly pace near the trees.
Next was Sun, but she didn’t make an appearance as I spoke about her species. “Well…unfortunately we can’t guarantee that every animal comes out to say hi,” I sighed. “But…oh wait, here she is.”
The green lion with several horns and many eyes along her flank came out from the forest. “Hello,” she spoke.
“Hi, Sun,” I replied. “We have visitors.”
“What’s that?” Wesley asked suddenly, pointing at the small plastic bag that was still where I’d left it.
“Oh! That is Sun’s enrichment,” I said with a smile. “I put dozens of books on a flash drive and found that she can read them just like she’d read a shelf of books.”
Wesley’s eyes widened. “Wow. I don’t think I’ve read about anyone trying that before. That’s really cool.”
“The books are new and interesting,” Sun spoke, drawing our attention. “I’m grateful for them.”
I nodded to her. “You’re quite welcome.”
The next animal, unfortunately, wasn’t there, and we waited around for ten minutes as we discussed him. He was large and reptile-like with red eyes, with its hind legs and tail making him look vaguely like a kangaroo. Then, enclosure ten was a terrifyingly disturbing creature, the not-a-centaur with no skin, that I’d only seen a few times while walking my route. It gave a good demonstration of its ferocity, showing its sharp teeth and snapping at us a few times.
“I’m thinking of trying salt licks and other horse enrichment like a big bouncy ball,” I told Wesley, whose eyebrows went up at that. “Maybe give him more things to forage like scattered grains or a box filled with pinecones and seeds. Foraging is a huge part of a horse’s life in the wild, and humans have to do a lot of activities like that to keep pet horses busy. Of course, he also loves the little salt-water lake that was built for him.”
We spent some time looking at the animal before moving past our last stop, the empty enclosure of the animal was stolen. Carla glanced at me with a sad smile, knowing what had happened, it seemed. I gave her a nod as we continued on our way, walking into the office. “So, I hope everyone enjoyed themselves!” I said with a smile.
“That was the coolest birthday present I’ve ever gotten,” Wesley said, looking to Denise. “Thanks so much, seriously.”
“It was my pleasure,” she said with a nod. “I’d never been here before, and knew I’d find it fascinating. Thank you for the educational aspect,” Denise said, glancing at me. “I learned quite a lot.”
“Happy to hear it,” I said, returning the nod.
As I escorted the guests out of the zoo and locked the door behind them, I reflected on how much I’d changed. The first time I’d seen Yui’s tarantula form, I’d nearly passed out from fear. Now here I was, walking tourists around like it was no big deal. Humans really can adapt to anything, it seems.
That afternoon, Suzanne had texted me that she was coming by after my shift, and I met her in Andrew’s office, shutting the door to the security room behind me. “How’s Andrew?” I asked first thing.
“He’s doing well,” she said with a wide smile. “Back on non-hospital food. He’s allowed to order food on his phone, and to hear it from him, that’s the best news he’d received in a long time.”
I chuckled. “I guess some clichés are true for a reason.”
“Indeed.” She took a breath. “All right. Ripley…I would like to discuss something with you.”
My face went slack at the serious tone in her voice. “I’m not… Am I being fired?”
“What? No!” she exclaimed. Then she chuckled softly. “No, it’s nothing like that. Just, here, let’s have a seat.” Suzanne walked over to the couch and sat at one end, and I took the other. “There’s something I need to tell you. Something I’ve kept from you, that I wanted to keep from you until you found your sea legs here.”
“Well…I have,” I said with a nod. “So, what is it?”
Suzanne took a breath. “I knew your mother.”
The words hung in the air for a moment before making their way to my ears. It was a perfectly logical sentence, and yet it didn’t make any sense. “What?” I finally managed.
“When you graduated college, I decided to move the zoo from Italy to within driving distance of your home,” she said softly. “Near enough to your town that you’d see the advert. We ignored any other applicants and I hoped you’d apply. Actually, I expected you’d apply. Not just for the money, but considering the field you wanted to go into. As soon as I’d found out your major, I knew.”
“Wait, wait, wait,” I said, holding up a hand. I pinched the bridge of my nose. “How do you know Patricia?”
“She owned the zoo before I did,” Susan explained. “Fourteen years ago…she was working to track an injured animal that we could bring into the zoo and she was killed by poachers.”
My heart calcified in my chest and a lump lodged in my throat. As my breaths became shaky, I stared at her in shock. “She…she’s really dead?”
“You suspected?” she asked softly.
“It…” I swallowed hard. “We had her declared legally dead after…I don’t know, seven years I think. My dad wanted to go after her for child support, but the police said…they said they couldn’t find…” Tears came to my eyes and I blinked them back before I met Suzanne’s gaze. “She owned the zoo?”
Suzanne nodded. “It was her baby, you’d say. When Patricia passed, I inherited it, which we’d discussed beforehand, a legal just-in-case that I never expected her to need. I’m under the impression that you were told she went to Africa for her photography career, but she was in fact going to remote areas back in my home world almost every time.”
“But I-I saw the photos,” I said, my eyes narrowing. “You’re telling me she put on a show of getting pictures that someone else took for us to see every time she visited? Did my dad even know?”
“I suppose that’s an accurate way to put it, putting on a show. And no, your father was never told. It’s not the way of things to tell humans unless it’s necessary. I won’t bore you with the details, but us and humans, we’re distant relatives, so we can still have children. But it wasn’t planned. Your mother fell in love with your father despite herself; she hadn’t meant to find love. Then she became pregnant with you and…well, the rest is history.”
“I think she had a different definition of love than the one I have,” I said tightly. “You’d think she’d have put her survival as more of a priority. Put being with the man she ‘loved’ as a priority. Her kids needed her. I needed her. She signed up when she became a mom. She could’ve screwed up all the time but she couldn’t even manage that one job: be there. When I was in the hospital, I kept thinking, ‘Where is she?’ and now you’re telling me that she put these animals above being there for her kids, and this whole time she’s been dead.”
“The hospital?” she asked, furrowing her brows.
“Never mind,” I said tersely, averting my gaze.
Suzanne hesitated before she nodded slowly. “I’m sorry for your loss, and not just for her death, Ripley,” she told me. “Patricia was…well, a ‘free spirit’ would be putting it gently. She always assumed the world would be there for her whenever she needed it.”
Staring at her for a long moment, I shook my head. “Why? Why come here and hire me?”
“I thought that would be obvious,” she said, smiling. “Your mother was so passionate about this place and once I found out your college major, I figured you would be as well.”
“Did you know that I hate her?” At that, Suzanne’s expression froze on the edge of shock. “She…she left us,” I whispered. “Didn’t tell us who she was or what she really did for a living and gave us no closure. And even when she was here, it was just visiting. Her real home was her work. She could give me all the presents she wanted, but even when she was here, half the time she was still on her computer doing work. It’s not like that stereotype of never making it to my tennis practice or something; it’s that it always felt like she was only partially here, even when I was sitting next to her. I don’t even know if I appreciate her turning me into a wildlife fanatic because it…it…makes me feel like I’m close to her in a way that’s just infuriating. She loved the animals more than she loved us.”
“Oh, Ripley-”
“Don’t,” I said, shoving myself to my feet. “Don’t try to convince me otherwise.”
“I wasn’t going to,” she said quietly. I pursed my lips. “I was going to say that I’m sorry that was the case. Your mother was…flawed, just like any other person. She had two loves in this world: her family and her work. And often, her work overcame her, her zeal for environmentalism getting in the way of being a good mum. She left your father trying to fill the role of two parents, holding your family together. You and your brother and your father, you all deserved better than that.”
My lower lip quivered but I bit down on it hard. It would’ve been a lot easier for me if she’d been speaking from a place of clueless reassurance about all this. But everything she said was making sense and that meant I didn’t have someone in front of me to be angry with.
“Why didn’t you tell me when Andrew hired me?” I sighed, sitting back down on the couch.
“Well, like I said, I wanted you to find your sea legs,” she said with a small smile. “I didn’t want the truth affecting whether or not you wanted to work here, whether you wanted to stay here after finding out about what the animals are. It would’ve complicated things, the emotions you’ll have to work through now that you know the truth. Whether or not you decide to give another tour, you also know what they’re like. That’s the benchmark I wanted you to reach before you found out about who you are.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Who I-” My face went slack. “Wait.”
Suzanne nodded slowly. “You’re only half human. Your brother too.”
The room seemed to tilt on an axis for a moment. “That means I’m also half…what?”
“We call ourselves Eldritch, these days,” she replied.
My eyes bugged out. “What?” I exclaimed. “So you’re all, like, gods or something?”
Suzanne burst out laughing. “Oh no, goodness, no,” she chuckled. “It’s just a word. We live in a very different world from this one, and a few generations ago we discovered the word and it made its way into our lexicon. But it does mean you can see all the animals. Indeed you did, on the tour you gave.”
“Wait, no, I had the glasses that…” I stopped. “Did those glasses do anything?”
She gave a sly smile and shook her head. “Not a thing. You made incredibly quick progress, and then when it came time for the tour, all you needed was to expect to see the animals, and you did.”
Genetics. That’s what Andrew had said during our interview, that part of how many animals you could see was determined by genetics. I guess having a mother who was originally from the other dimension gave me all the genes I needed to see everything here. “Could I…visit your world?” I asked tentatively. “You said that my mom took photos of the animals there. Could I…” My voice trailed off, not even sure if or how I wanted to finish that sentence.
“Those who are half human, especially those who are raised on Earth, don’t come visit,” she said gently. “I could show you some photos of other animals, and I could loan you as many books as you’d like, but it’s simply not a place where you’d be safe.”
“Oh,” I said, leaning into the couch cushion as I pictured the animals in the zoo. “Yeah, actually that…makes sense.” I paused. “So, what now?”
“It’s up to you,” she said. “I wanted to wait until I was sure you were comfortable with your position here, and then put the ball in your court. And so it is. What do you want to do now?”
What did I want to do? It wasn’t that difficult a question, just a deep, serious one.
I wanted to thrive, as the animals did. This is my enrichment now, working at an incredible, wonderful, terrifying zoo. The experience so far hasn’t been perfect, and I know there are risks, but life isn’t about staying safe. It’s about learning new things and making a difference in the world. And, if you’re lucky, having a job that’s something really special.

THE END

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2024.05.19 06:02 AutoModerator WEEKLY LEGIT CHECK THREAD // 4 - 21 - 2024

Please use this for questions/links as much as possible. It allows us to use posts to keep content diverse and interesting for all enthusiasts of VETEMENTS.
Feel free to post images or listings for the purpose of Legit Checking. No QC's or intentional fakes allowed.
Good Faith rule is still in place - differences can be expressed but please keep conversations civil.
Hint: If it's from Depop it's probably fake
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2024.05.19 06:01 overlorddogz Does he like me or is he friend zoning me?

So there’s this guy I have been friends with for about a year now (not his real name but we’ll call him Jim lol) and our friendship has been growing stronger every day. Last year (freshman year for me, junior year for him) I had a big crush on his best friend and never really talked to Jim. But my crush on his friend died at the end of the school year and that summer when Barbie and Oppenheimer came out I posted on my instagram story about seeing Oppenheimer and he replied to it. So on Insta dms we talked for a few weeks and then things sorta died down. During those weeks I did kinda have a crush on Jim but that crush went away too after we stopped talking for a bit. Then in like late September I got snapchat and we added each other and immediately started talking. It’s been on and off talking and on and off crushes (on my end at least) since then up until about February? I’m gonna just list everything that’s happened since then as bullet points in a sorta chronological order.
-I complained on my story about buying a dress that ended up being mad ugly and he replied to it asking to see it and then said i look good
-whenever he sees me in the hallway at school he always yells my name no matter how far away he is from me and says hi to me
-he saves a lot of my snaps on snapchat. Some are pretty and some are me look stupid lol
-when i broke my hip in December-march (from a track injury) he’d get like mad at me when i tried to run before it was fully healed
-he’s a gymbro and offered to take me to the gym wirh him when i started to get down on myself for not being able to gain muscle
-he’s 18 now and i’m 16 and one day he kinda randomly messaged me on snap saying “when i’m 19 you’ll be 17” and i thoguht to myself that it was really random lol. But hes said a lot of things that are just kinda him fixating on my age and im wondering if hes scared to ask me out or something because of the fact that im two years younger
-i posted a kinda slutty but also really cute goth/grunge outfit on my snap story saying that i need it and he was like “that would be so sick” ..is bro into goth girls or nah i cant tell
-he asked for my number and then we played this game together and stayed up for like an hour on facetime together while we played the game and he helped give me tips and walk me through the game since i fricking suxked at it (this happened like two days ago and it was our first time facetiming and at the very end he blew me a kiss, threw me a peace sign, and then said “bye love you” and hung up before i could evn say anything back)
-if you know those flirty whisper things all over pinterest i posted teo of those that said “first date idea: we sleep for 12 hours” and “can i come over and you talk about your day” on my story and he rpelied “perhaps”
-he added me to this group chat with 4 of his other friends (all guys). I cant tel if this is peak friendzoing or not
-constant gamepigeon games during school
-we’re calling again tonight
Side note, i know for a fact he is straight hahah. I just cannot tell if he likes me or if he is friendzoning me
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2024.05.19 06:01 Intrepid-Community86 listing about digital cameras always gets deleted

listing about digital cameras always gets deleted
every time i make a listing trying to sell digital cameras, I get the email saying they don't allow eletronics "except for cameras" and it makes no sense??? i've sold a couple digital cameras and have tons of them i just want to get rid of bc i don't use them but every time they get deleted and i worry it's going to affect my account. does this happen to anyone else? is there a key word i'm not supposed to use?
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2024.05.19 06:01 adulting4kids December 2nd Prompts and Character Profile Template

This post will repeat weekly through the month of December. Please repost or cross post as a way to promote this subreddit. Or ignore this one and check out our others! I apologize if it's cramping your style, but when I work hard on certain posts I want to be sure they are useful! I also am working on making these shorter so they don't get lost in the madness....
Scroll down for the Character Questions and create a thoughtful and empathetic profile of your main characters for your projects!
As always please use these as sparks to create and feel free to post your responses and ideas in comments or separate post! This is YOUR subreddit so go ahead and post away!
Prompt: Imagine a dystopian world where an oppressive government has successfully erased all forms of personal identity and history. In this society, individuals are assigned generic roles and are forbidden from expressing their unique thoughts, emotions, or experiences. Write a short story or reflective essay exploring the life of a character who discovers a hidden underground community that encourages self-expression and reignites the importance of personal narratives.
In your response, consider the following:
  1. Character and World Building:
    • Describe the protagonist's background, their assigned role, and their initial perception of the oppressive world they inhabit.
    • Develop the hidden underground community, including its purpose, structure, and the means through which it safeguards personal stories.
    • Create a contrast between the protagonist's initial world and the underground community, highlighting the impact of personal narratives on shaping identity and resisting oppression.
  2. Plot Analysis:
    • Outline the protagonist's journey of discovery, including their initial skepticism, the influential encounters they have within the underground community, and the personal sacrifices they make to preserve their identity.
    • Explore the challenges and conflicts faced by the protagonist, both externally (e.g., encounters with government authorities) and internally (e.g., the struggle to confront their identity).
  3. Deep Introspection:
    • Prompt the protagonist to reflect deeply on the uncomfortable subjects that the government's erasure of personal narratives seeks to suppress. These could include topics such as individuality, memory, trauma, and the power of storytelling as a tool for empathy and resistance.
    • Encourage the protagonist to evolve their thoughts and perceptions throughout the narrative, considering the consequences of silence and the potential for personal growth through self-expression and sharing.
  4. Requirements for Responses:
    • Conduct research to explore real-world examples of societies that suppress personal narratives or attempt to erase collective memory.
  5. Prompt: In a post-apocalyptic world, a devastating pandemic has wiped out most of humanity. The survivors are forced to live in isolated communities, each with its own set of strict rules and customs. Write a short story or reflective essay exploring the life of a character who questions the existing order and embarks on a journey to unite these fragmented communities. Consider the role of unity, diversity, and collaboration in rebuilding a shattered world.
  6. Prompt: Set in a future where advanced AI technology has permeated every aspect of society, write a story or reflective essay following a protagonist who begins to question the boundaries between human and machine. Delve into the ethical implications of human-AI relationships, the erosion of human emotions, and the potential consequences of blurring the line between artificial and genuine experiences.
  7. Prompt: Imagine a world where climate change and environmental degradation have irreversibly altered the planet. Write a story or reflective essay from the perspective of a character who is part of a group striving to restore balance and heal the damaged Earth. Explore the connections between personal responsibility, collective action, and the intersections of social and environmental justice.
  8. Prompt: Transport yourself to a society where strict social hierarchies are based on a person's genetic makeup. Write a short story or reflective essay following a character who challenges this system and advocates for equality and inclusivity. Examine the role of genetic determinism, discrimination, and the power of individual agency in reshaping social structures.
  9. Prompt: Imagine a world where art and creativity are considered illegal, seen as tools of subversion and chaos. Write a story or reflective essay from the perspective of an artist who risks everything to defy this oppressive regime and reclaim the power of artistic expression. Analyze the significance of art as a form of resistance, its ability to inspire change, and its impact on personal and societal transformation.
Remember to consider the following for each of the prompts to insure a well rounded and thought out premise that will engage the audience and allow room for growth in the plot.
Prompt 1 - Post-Apocalyptic Community Building:
Prompt 2 - Ethical Implications of AI Technology:
Prompt 3 - Environmental Restoration and Social Justice:
Prompt 4 - Genetic Hierarchy and Social Change:
Prompt 5 - Artistic Expression as Resistance:
  1. Chick Lit: Write a chick lit novel or short story following a relatable protagonist navigating the challenges of love, career, and self-discovery. Explore themes of friendship, personal growth, and finding balance in a fast-paced, modern world.
  2. Young Readers' Adventure: Imagine a group of young friends who stumble upon a hidden portal to another realm. Write an adventure novel or short story as they embark on a quest to save a magical world from darkness. Delve into themes of friendship, bravery, and the power of imagination.
  3. Historical Fiction: Set in a time of significant historical events, write a novel or short story highlighting a lesser-known figure or group of people. Research the historical context meticulously and emphasize the character's resilience, struggles, and contributions during that tumultuous period.
  4. Fantasy: Create a fantastical world filled with mythical creatures, magic, and ancient prophecies. Write a novel or short story following a young protagonist who discovers their extraordinary abilities and must navigate a treacherous journey to fulfill their destiny. Explore themes of self-discovery, heroism, and the blurred lines between good and evil.
  5. Mystery/Thriller: Write a gripping mystery or thriller novel following a seasoned detective or amateur sleuth investigating a perplexing crime. Develop complex characters, suspenseful plot twists, and an intricate web of clues and red herrings that keep readers guessing until the very end.
  6. Science Fiction: Set in a future where technological advancements have transformed society, write a novel or short story exploring the ethical and societal implications of groundbreaking inventions. Examine themes such as artificial intelligence, genetic engineering, or virtual reality and their impact on humanity's future.
  7. Romance: Craft a heartwarming romance novel or short story centered around two individuals from different backgrounds or opposing sides. Explore themes of love, forgiveness, and the triumph of the human spirit in the face of adversity.
  8. Coming-of-Age: Write a coming-of-age novel or short story following a young protagonist's journey of self-discovery, identity formation, and navigating the complexities of adolescence. Explore themes of friendship, personal growth, and the challenges of transitioning into adulthood.
  9. Psychological Thriller: Create a psychological thriller novel or short story that delves into the intricacies of the human mind. Focus on a protagonist who becomes entangled in a web of deception, manipulation, and paranoia. Explore themes of trust, perception, and the blurred lines between reality and illusion.
  10. Family Drama: Write a novel or short story exploring the dynamics and complexities within a multi-generational family. Include themes of love, secrets, and conflicts that arise as family members navigate their relationships, face past traumas, and strive for reconciliation.
Considerations for each prompt:
  1. Historical Romance: Write a one-page historical romance set in a lavish ballroom during the Victorian era. Focus on the forbidden love between a spirited debutante and a mysterious gentleman from a different social class.
  2. Science Fiction Comedy: Craft a one-page comedic story set in a futuristic space station. Follow the misadventures of a clumsy maintenance technician who unwittingly saves the day against all odds.
  3. Paranormal Mystery: Pen a one-page mystery story set in a haunted mansion. Introduce a skeptical paranormal investigator who must solve the mystery of a ghostly apparition that has been terrorizing the inhabitants.
  4. Literary Fiction: Write a one-page literary fiction piece centered around a character's contemplation of the fleeting nature of life and the importance of cherishing the present moment.
  5. Action Adventure: Craft a one-page action-packed adventure story set in the jungles of an unexplored island. Follow a daring archaeologist's quest for a hidden treasure while battling against treacherous obstacles and rival adventurers.
  6. Psychological Drama: Create a one-page psychological drama following the internal struggles of a troubled artist as they grapple with their inner demons and seek redemption.
  7. Magical Realism: Write a one-page magical realism story set in a sleepy coastal town. Explore the extraordinary occurrences that happen when an enigmatic mermaid washes ashore and disrupts the mundane lives of the townsfolk.
  8. Thriller: Craft a one-page thriller story involving a race against time. Follow a determined protagonist as they try to decipher cryptic clues and prevent a citywide disaster.
  9. Fantasy Adventure: Pen a one-page fantasy adventure story set in a whimsical realm. Follow a young hero's quest to retrieve a stolen artifact and restore balance to the land, encountering fantastical creatures and overcoming obstacles along the way.
  10. Historical Fiction Mystery: Write a one-page historical fiction mystery set during the Roaring Twenties. Follow a quick-witted detective as they unravel a web of deceit and intrigue surrounding a glamorous underground speakeasy in the heart of the city.
Considerations for each prompt:
Protagonist Character Profile:
  1. Name:
  2. Age:
  3. Gender:
  4. Physical appearance:
  5. Background:
  6. Personality traits (list at least five):
  7. Core values and beliefs:
  8. Motivations and goals:
  9. Biggest fear:
  10. Internal conflicts:
  11. External conflicts:
  12. Strengths:
  13. Weaknesses:
  14. Childhood experiences and their impact:
  15. Education and professional background:
  16. Relationship status and dynamics:
  17. Quirks or peculiar habits:
  18. Psychological disorders, if any:
  19. Familial relationships and dynamics:
  20. Support system (friends, mentors, etc.):
  21. Traumatic experiences and their effects:
  22. Coping mechanisms:
  23. Emotional vulnerabilities:
  24. Resilience and determination:
  25. Personal growth throughout the story:
Protagonist Character Questions:
  1. What drives the protagonist to take action and pursue their goals?
  2. How does the protagonist's childhood shape their behaviors and choices?
  3. What values does the protagonist hold dear, and how do they influence their decision-making process?
  4. What inner conflicts does the protagonist face, and how do they attempt to reconcile them?
  5. How does the protagonist's education and professional background contribute to their strengths and weaknesses?
  6. What traumatic experiences has the protagonist overcome, and how have these experiences shaped their worldview?
  7. How does the protagonist cope with stress or adversity?
  8. What relationships and dynamics are most significant to the protagonist, and how do these relationships evolve throughout the story?
  9. In what ways does the protagonist exhibit resilience and determination in the face of challenges?
  10. How does the protagonist approach personal growth and self-improvement?
  11. What psychological disorders, if any, does the protagonist struggle with, and how do these disorders impact their thoughts and actions?
  12. How does the protagonist's physical appearance contribute to their self-perception and interactions with others?
  13. What unique quirks or habits does the protagonist possess that make them stand out?
  14. What are the protagonist's primary desires and aspirations?
  15. How does the protagonist's internalized fear drive or hinder their actions?
  16. How does the protagonist navigate and resolve external conflicts?
  17. What coping mechanisms does the protagonist rely on during times of stress or emotional turmoil?
  18. How do familial relationships and dynamics influence the protagonist's actions and decisions?
  19. What significant life choices or dilemmas does the protagonist face throughout the story, and how do they respond?
  20. In what ways does the protagonist's support system impact their growth and resilience?
  21. How does the protagonist's personal development and self-discovery contribute to the overall narrative arc?
  22. How does the protagonist's background and experiences shape their perception of the world?
  23. What are the protagonist's core beliefs and values, and how do these impact their interactions with others?
  24. How does the protagonist handle setbacks or failures, and what lessons do they learn from these experiences?
  25. What external influences or societal pressures affect the protagonist's decision-making process?
Antagonist Character Profile:
  1. Name:
  2. Age:
  3. Gender:
  4. Physical appearance:
  5. Background:
  6. Personality traits (list at least five):
  7. Core values and beliefs:
  8. Motivations and goals:
  9. Biggest fear:
  10. Internal conflicts:
  11. External conflicts:
  12. Strengths:
  13. Weaknesses:
  14. Childhood experiences and their impact $ Go on
  1. Education and professional background: 16. Relationship status and dynamics: 17. Quirks or peculiar habits: 18. Psychological disorders, if any: 19. Familial relationships and dynamics: 20. Support system (friends, mentors, etc.): 21. Traumatic experiences and their effects: 22. Coping mechanisms: 23. Emotional vulnerabilities: 24. Strategies for achieving their goals: 25. Methods they employ to antagonize the protagonist:
Antagonist Character Questions:
  1. What drives the antagonist to oppose the protagonist and act as an obstacle in their journey?
  2. How does the antagonist's background and upbringing contribute to their negative behaviors and motivations?
  3. What core values and beliefs does the antagonist hold that align with their antagonistic actions?
  4. What personal goals or desires does the antagonist seek to fulfill?
  5. What is the biggest fear or insecurity that drives the antagonist's actions?
  6. How does the antagonist's internal conflicts manifest and impact their decisions?
  7. What external conflicts arise as a result of the antagonist's actions, and how do they handle these conflicts?
  8. In what ways does the antagonist exhibit strength and power, and how do these traits affect their interactions with others?
  9. What are the antagonist's weaknesses or vulnerabilities that can be exploited by the protagonist?
  10. How have childhood experiences shaped the antagonist's worldview and motivations?
  11. How does the antagonist's education and professional background contribute to their methods and strategies?
  12. What familial relationships or dynamics influence the antagonist's actions and choices?
  13. What unique quirks or habits does the antagonist possess that make them distinct or memorable?
  14. Are there any psychological disorders or conditions that contribute to the antagonist's behavior?
  15. How does the antagonist cope with stress or emotional turmoil?
  16. What strategies or tactics does the antagonist employ to achieve their goals and antagonize the protagonist?
  17. How do the antagonist's actions impact their relationships and interactions with other characters in the story?
18.How does the antagonist perceive and justify their actions, even if they are considered morally or ethically wrong?
  1. What external influences or societal pressures contribute to the antagonist's motivations or actions?
  2. How does the antagonist's physical appearance contribute to their demeanor and portrayal in the story?
  3. What significant life choices or dilemmas has the antagonist faced, and how have these shaped their character?
  4. What is the antagonist's reaction to setbacks or failures, and how do they adapt their strategies?
  5. How does the antagonist's support system or lack thereof impact their actions and decisions?
  6. What past traumatic experiences or events have influenced the antagonist's worldview and behaviors?
  7. How does the antagonist's emotional state or emotional vulnerabilities influence their actions and interactions with others?
submitted by adulting4kids to writingthruit [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:01 AutoModerator Weekly Suspected Lupus Thread - Week Of May 19, 2024

This is a weekly thread for those who haven't been diagnosed, but still have questions about the diagnostic process. Please read the posting guidelines and rules! Everyone is welcome to contribute, and this is a safe space.
QUESTIONS ARE LIMITED TO 400 WORDS
____________________________________________
Please read this before posting as it may answer some of your questions:
If you use the search bar at the top of Reddit and make sure it’s set to lupus, it will search just the subreddit for your keywords. That way you can get the full breadth of questions and answers. This isn’t to say that you can’t ask questions in the general forum.

ANA tests

Positive ANA does not equal lupus! While more of a rule out screening (negative ANA = very unlikely to have SLE). Upwards of 15-20% of healthy individuals in the population at large will have a positive ANA. Only about 10-15% of people who have a positive ANA will later be diagnosed with SLE.

Tests used in diagnosing lupus

Also, if you suspect you have a rash, getting a biopsy of it done at a dermatologist’s office can be helpful as the pathologist can identify histological evidence of lupus.

Diagnostic Process

ACR Diagnostic Criteria on lupus wiki
The rheumatologist/PCP will take a detailed history. I highly recommend writing down as many of your symptoms as possible, especially focusing on the symptoms you have that are in the American College of Rheumatology diagnostic criteria for lupus - see link above.
Include all your symptoms, but I would make those at the top of the list. Write down how long they’ve been going on, anything that makes them better or worse, and how much they impact your life. Do they prevent you from dressing yourself, eating/cooking, bathing yourself, doing hobbies, meeting your obligations?
ANA varies from person to person and doesn’t necessarily correlate with disease activity. Anti-dsDNA is more indicative of disease activity and can be elevated prior to and during a flare. Symptoms can also come and go, and over time you may develop additional symptoms. If you scroll through the last week of posts or so, there are a few posts that will have pretty detailed answers to your questions from multiple community members so you can get a better sense of just how full on fickle lupus can be.
Here are some good posts, one is other people experiences in general, the others are rashes (warning: some are particularly severe):
User community diagnosis experiences
This is a malar rash
Photosensitive Lupus Rash
SLE Malar rash
QUESTIONS ARE LIMITED TO 400 WORDS
submitted by AutoModerator to lupus [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 06:00 AutoModerator Today’s Daily Draw

About Daily Draws
One of the best ways to practice Lenormand is to throw a daily spread. This can be any number of cards as you like, although it usually consists of three, five, or seven (an odd number) cards in a line. Start with a specific intention and question, such as, “What does the world have for me today?” Make sure you keep this timeline in mind when drawing your cards.
While it may sound daunting to practice every day, drawing cards in the morning is actually quite simple. For example, let’s say you draw three cards. Usually they are read from left to right, or maybe describe the day as a whole. The center card is your focus card, with the last card representing the outcome. Or, perhaps the first card represents the subject and the second and third cards describe it. Feel free to create your own method.
It’s very helpful to keep a journal and look back on your throws to see what worked out and what didn’t. What interpretations might you have missed?
This exercise helps you build a connection with your cards and come up with your own combinations. If you find something new, write down the combination in your Lenormand notebook.
Note that, when you throw a daily spread, the cards usually represent smaller elements of your life rather than bigger components. For example, the Clouds could simply mean a storm rather than, say, mental illness.
So, what did you guys come up with for today?
submitted by AutoModerator to Lenormand [link] [comments]


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