My brake pedal was exactly like that before brake job, I replaced all rotors and brake pads, flushed a fluid and bled it a couple of times. It’s 100% there is no air in the brake lines. But the brake pedal still operates exactly like it was before, goes to the floor 4-5 cm and only after that the car starts slowly stopping. I am not satisfied with that because it increases braking distance. I want to make the pedal as stiff as possible and control it only with force. Do you guys have any ideas? It’s 2004 CVPI. How does it work in your interceptors? I’ve found YT video where the author states that he has same exact problem on all his CVPIs

Just purchased a new EB40 to commute to work on, arrived and had it assembled by Friday evening. Charged the battery from the time I unpacked it from the box to Saturday morning - but bike will not operate. No display, no headlight, nothing. Charger shows green - so I think its charged? Snagged a digital multimeter, checked between the terminals on the bottom - can't get a voltage beyond 6.5v to measure, a lot of 0 V measurements - but I'll admit that I am not sure of what terminal is responsible for what. Charger shows 54.6V output, so I don't think the charger is dead. Does this mean the battery is toast?

- May 16, 2024
Good:

• Solid execution and better-than-expected performance across all business segments.
• Strong operating margin of over 21% for equipment operations.
• Resilient earthmoving and road building markets.
• Proactive inventory management and underproduction of large tractors to align with retail demand.
• Positive price realization in North America and Europe.
• Strong demand and adoption of technology in Brazil.

Bad:

• Decline in net sales and revenues by 12% to $15.235 billion.
• Decline in net sales for the equipment operations by 15% to $13.61 billion.
• Decline in net sales for production and precision ag by 16%.
• Decline in net sales for small ag and turf by 23%.
• Softening in ag and turf markets globally, leading to more challenging market conditions.
• Decline in industry sales in the U.S., Canada, and Europe.
• Headwinds from rising global stocks, lower commodity prices, high interest rates, and weather volatility.
• Impact of used inventory levels and high interest rates on purchase decisions.

Ugly:

• Tragic flooding in Rio Grande de Sul, affecting employees, customers, and suppliers.
• Uncertainty and decline in farmer sentiment affecting ag equipment retail demand.
• Higher production costs and overheads offsetting favorable freight and material costs.
• Higher R&D and SA&G expenses impacting operating profit for construction and forestry segment.
• Softening in rental demand and declines in commercial real estate in construction and forestry markets.
• Overall decline in demand and underproduction leading to adjustments in production rates.

Earnings Breakdown:
Financial Metrics:

• Net sales and revenues down 12% to $15.235 billion.
• Net sales for the equipment operations down 15% to $13.61 billion.
• Net income attributable to Deere & Company was $2.37 billion or $8.53 per diluted share.
• Operating margin of 21.2% for the equipment operations.
• Operating profit of $1.65 billion for the production and precision ag segment.
• Operating profit of $571 million for the small ag and turf segment.
• Operating profit of $668 million for the construction and forestry segment.
• Worldwide financial services net income of $162 million.

Product Metrics:

• Net sales for production and precision ag down 16% to $6.581 billion.
• Net sales for small ag and turf down 23% to $3.185 billion.
• Net sales for construction and forestry down 7% to $3.844 billion.
• Underproduction of large tractor retail demand in North America in the back half of the year.
• Strong demand and adoption of technology, including Starlink connectivity solution and Precision Ag Essentials bundle in Brazil.
• Strong competition and price realization in North America and Europe.
• Positive order book for earthmoving equipment in construction and forestry segment.

Source: Decode Investing AI Assistant

Edit by me.
This fic delves into Malbonte’s motives and inner struggles during the events of Heaven’s Secret 2. Chapter 5 covers the first part of the final battle with the Mother.
Ao3 Link
Ffnet Link
Enjoy! Only one more chapter left! 😬

This incident had occurred 6 weeks ago. Objectively, my (40M) intoxicated ex girlfriend (37M), at an already rocky phase of our relationship, once we all returned from a dinner party at my parents house, had demanded that i did not follow the routine of putting my autistic son (from the previous marriage) to bed and instead attended to her. Given that this was a typical, angry, relentless demand, that hours prior to it she had caused a scene at my parents, and that a week prior she stormed out of the house dispensing wishes that my kids should die of diabetes, i lost it and told her to eff off. I did and i regret it. I should not have said anything. In response to that she:

• got out of bed and walked into my sons room, grabbed the book that we were going to read, bear hugged and it laid down on the unoccupied bottom bunk of the bunk bed in my sons room, stating that we are not going to read.
• i laughed, asked for the book with various polite verbal persuasions, and as soon as i leaned towards her to try and take the book, i received several kicks in my stomach.
• She then walked from the room to the living room, and laid on the couch. I've followed her, and as she was laying down, she let go of the book. as i was walking back to my son's room now with the book, she had followed me, but stopped at the kitchen table, grabbed my phone and tried to unlock it (she has the password, nothing is hidden), but stated that she is doing it to delete the messages that proved that a week prior she wished that my kids died. I did try to grab the phone, but could not, and as she also could not unlock it she had thrown it, twice, i suppose in an effort to destroy it. On her third attempt i was able to grab my phone from her hands.
• She had then started grabbing me, my hands mostly, in order o get the phone. I don't think she was hitting me, but the risk that i was now facing is that this had turned into a violent confrontation. I was trying to get away from her, swerving my body and my phone in my hands out of the way and attempted to distance myself from her. I've managed to make it to the front door with her being all over me (physically trying to grab me) and i've exited the house. In my mind i was doing it as a deterrent so she would then be forced to prioritize on preventing our dogs from running out instead of focusing on me. This worked. I ended up with my phone on the front lawn and she went back into the house.
• I've then realized that she could lock me out, which is a risk with my son still being home, so i immediately went back inside. When i entered the house i saw her at the kitchen table: she lifted my work laptop and smashed in on the table, and as i started to approach her, she lifted it again and threw it against the wall. As i was now near her, she again turned on me in an attempt to get my phone from me.
• I again had to repeat my steps of exiting the house as she was clawing at my hands and grabbing me to get my phone. This time it was more challenging and forceful and i actually fell out of the house and down the steps )
• I did not know what to do next. I dialed 911. I've reported domestic disturbance.

I can think of several paths that i could have taken. I could have stood there and done nothing, allowing her to damage things at will. I could have also attempted to verbally persuade her as i would have watched her being uncivil. I could have applied force and this is what would have been interpreted as an assault and i would have been arrested. I could have tried physically comforting her, with a hug, that would have also been interpreted as an assault. I could have grabbed my kid and left the house, but how ? She was technically attacking me.
Any hard that she would have sustained would have been used against me.
The phone call to 911 was an attempt for me to persuade her to stop, and it worked. As soon as she had heard the operator, she simply went back inside that house and went to bed.
I am regretting that this had occurred. Should it be assumed that relationships come with a risk of loosing freedom? What would you have done differently when in such situation ?

I swear these things are just a black hole for money. The return rate is comically low. Right now my one oil company has a capitalization of over $600 billion, with an hourly output of just over $800 million. I could’ve made more using literally anything else. My stock portfolio nets me 5 times that amount at half the cost ($300 billion cost and $4.5 billion in payouts).
It’s so bad that it honestly feels like there was a mistake somewhere. The oil wells in particular are just so expensive compared to their production.

1/ At the bottom of the pyramid, there are the most basic elements that we need, like food, shelter, and sleep. As we satisfy these needs, we move up the pyramid and we get into things like safety and connections with other people, as well as feelings of accomplishment. The “elements of value” works similarly. At the bottom of the pyramid, there are functional consumer needs/wants, emotional ones above it, then life-changing, and self-transcendence at the very top. Full post.
2/ Lindbergh is a provider of niche, complex, mission-critical logistics services for industrial maintenance & repair operations (MRO) technicians in Italy and France. The complexity and niche end markets allow for stellar unit economics. Gross customer and revenue churn is zero in most years. Full post.
3/ Seadrill (SDRL-NYSE) is a $3.4 billion offshore drilling company from Norway, currently headquartered in Houston, TX, and trading on the NYSE. The company is expected to generate ~$500M in EBITDA and ~$200M in FCF in 2023. More importantly, as Seadrill’s contracts roll off within the next 24 months. Full post.
4/ Occidental Petroleum shares offer investors an opportunity to own a high-quality O&G operator with substantial exposure to the Permian Basin (the highest quality patch of O&G assets in the US) for a meaningful discount to intrinsic value. I estimate that shares should be worth ~$100 by 2026 based on a 12x multiple on $8 - $8.50 of midcycle per share FC. Full post.
5/ These days, most people are too busy (physically, psychologically, and emotionally) to notice and pay attention to all the marketing and advertising going on around them. If you want people to pay attention to your business or organization, your marketing needs to show them something they have never seen before. Few products and services are truly unique (at least in the eyes of consumers) and thus marketing must serve the purpose of this “something” that your prospective customers have never seen before. Full post.

I started writing this last month after realizing the kind of time I was wasting and how I was basically living weekend to weekend. I had similar experience while I was working during college. At the time I just left the work I was doing and focused on learning something else but now its different. Stakes are higher and markets are volatile and I am not in college anymore.

Agenda

1. Detailed plan for next 2 years
2. Broader plan for 5 years

Date: 20 April 2024

Goals

• What do I want by 20 April 2026?
  • Net worth of INR 1.5Cr
  • Be away from parents' home
  • Social life
  • Have a relationship (casual/serious anything, preferably casual)
  • Be physically fit (if possible mentally too but not a priority)
  • Read regularly and regular journaling
  • Buy a car too (Only when I can pay for it fully cash)
• What do I want by 20 April 2029?
  • All of the above
  • Net worth of INR 10Cr
  • Not working for money
  • 3B house in good society

Current

• I live in parents' house (not out of need but convenience, saves a lot of time)
• I have a remote coding job which takes 8-9 hrs everyday
• I make INR 30L/year before tax, about INR 24L after tax
• Most likely the income will double in next 3 months
• I am 22.8 years old
• Rest of my time goes in social media scrolling (I intend to cut this) and started reading books recently.

How

• Keep going on current path
  • Pros
    • Likely to help the 2 year goal
    • A fish in hand is worth more than the thousands in the lake
  • Cons
    • Likely to help the 2 year goal
    • A fish in hand is worth more than the thousands in the lake
• Higher education in AI/ML
  • Pros
    • Looks sustainable for at least next 10 years.
    • Pretty much guaranteed success considering market trends
  • Cons
    • Declining student interest (applicant numbers decreasing)
    • Possible recession in the next 3 years
    • Going in negative net worth (Student debt)
• Higher education in MBA (Business/Finance)
  • Pros
    • Relatively old profession (GMAT is conducted since 1950s), so looks sustainable.
    • Something new and challenging for me.
  • Cons
    • Would current AI trend take over this profession? Can't say
    • Declining number of applicants
    • Going in negative net worth (Student debt)
• Pack bags and roam around the country to find answers (Possible due to remote job)
  • Pros
    • Sounds good
  • Cons
    • Inconvenient

After trying to find answers by myself for sometime. I have now decided to get opinions from strangers on the internet and see what next steps should be. Please comment on which is best path according to you and why? Or If there is something else other than listed above.

Edit by me.
This fic delves into Malbonte’s motives and inner struggles during the events of Heaven’s Secret 2. Chapter 5 covers the first part of the final battle with the Mother.
Ao3 Link
Ffnet Link
Enjoy! Only one more chapter left! 😬

Hi all. I'm 30F. Single. Been a fencesitter for probably the last 5 years or so. A lot of back and forth over what I want, what I think I want, what I've been taught to want, what the men I've dated wanted, etc.
I guess I just wanted to share some recent thoughts about the true- day to day logistics and realities of what I envision and how it seems truly SO challenging to me.
I do have struggles with mental health issues. I have anxiety and can have depressive episodes as well. I think that might contribute to my next point...
Life just feels so full. Even just for myself. Working full-time. Trying to balance alone time, social time, cooking, cleaning, etc.
It often feels like a hamster wheel. I truly don't know if I would be able to handle the daily operational components to motherhood.
I do think managing things with a partner would ideally make it more appealing. But even so...
I have a lot of other thoughts/feelings about this topic.
But today in particular. I actually stayed home from social plans after having an exhausting week. Not sure why I thought it, but literally thought- "how do people do this with kids?"
Thanks for listening (reading). What are your thoughts on this piece of the puzzle?

Hiloooo all, my name is Genesis! I'm 17 years old (18 in a month), nonbinary, autistic, and a furry. If that controversial amalgamation of social identities hasn't dissuaded you, read further, dear sojourner... My final year of highschool is coming to a close and with it a lot of change will usher in. It's a bit overwhelming to think about, but for now I'm cruising and things are placid (minus finals, which actually aren't so bad). However, I find myself somewhat lonely - and would love to pick up a few friends to go into this new era of my life with.
Anyhow, more in terms of my interests, I love a lot of intellectual things. I'm very drawn into political theory right now, philosophy and psychology are also things I eventually want to get a better grasp on. I've been reading a lot of classic Marxist canon lately, I got into Capital but have been taking a break to focus on ending my school year. The intellectual scene however is very much bogged down by holier-than-thou individuals who do a lot of arguing, polarizing, and little action or community work - as they like to think they're above the world. As a member of the world this irks me. So, inevitably, I want to use whatever I learn to engage with my community and promote meaningful political action - though for now my study hasn't amounted to much materially.
As for hobbies that allow me to step away from the chaos of the world and relax, I love a lot of things; from videogames, to television, to Dungeons & Dragons. I typically love RPGs when it comes to gaming, for now I'm balancing my time between Animal Well, NieR: Automata, and Stardew Valley. In terms of television, I'm big into sci-fi right now (Bonus points if you're a Trekkie. Need someone to get me into that!), in particular Battlestar Galactica has kept me hanging on every episode. And though D&D is the TTRPG im into - this summer I want to try and explore the tabletop scene more extensively, maybe Pathfinder or even Warhammer 40k.
If you feel we could bond, don't hesitate to drop a DM! Feel free to even stalk my profile a lil' if you want to uncover more deadly secrets about me. But plsplspls give me something more than "hi" or "hru," or I may ignore you

Element One is a semi-serious combined 75th Ranger and Green Beret unit. Our goal is to provide fun operations to our players through Zeus-Controlled missions. We play at 7:30 EST every Tuesdays with FTXs hosted sporadically.
Requirements? Our only requirements are to have a legal copy of Arma and a willingness to work as a team.
Structure
Our unit has 4 components; 2 combat elements (Rangers and Green Berets), a air support element, and a mission intel team (Zeus and mission briefings).
Rangers vs Green Beret?
Rangers are our bread-and-butter infantry force in operations Rangers will primarily focus on patrols, raids, and direct action missions while Green Berets' role is to serve as a support to Rangers, engaging secondary objectives and role-playing with locals to collect mission intel.
Modpack
RHS, Hatchet H-60, ACRE2, ACE, CUP, etc.
Roles and Availability
Leadership: OPEN
Grenadier: OPEN
Combat Life Saver: OPEN
MG Assistant: OPEN
MG: OPEN
Pilot (Rotary and Fixed Wing): OPEN
Automatic Rifleman: OPEN
Breacher: CLOSED
Interested? Join our Discord for a chat!
https://discord.gg/CxwTYjmXeQ

Hi. I’m a high school senior and recently got accepted to a few colleges, mainly UCs. For some background, I come from a really low income family, and I would be a first generation student.
I applied to some colleges just to see what would happen, and I got accepted to a few UCs, including a school I really want to go to.
I got a really good financial aid offer (my SAI index came out to be -1500, so basically the max amount of grants), but even with all the grants I’m still wondering if it would be worth it to go?
My other option, which was my “first choice” was Community College and then transfer to any UC.
For UC, I kinda calculated the costs based on the cheapest options, and without work study or any loans the total net price would be around 4-5k (everything else is covered in grants). This is just a rough estimate (the price that is listed on the portal is around 12k, but the housing and food estimates seemed much higher than if i were to choose the cheapest options offered etc)
Community College would, in my opinion, be a lot harder to manage. I’d be working for sure, and paying some other living expenses that come with it. Not sure if CC students get much aid to help with that. I would also probably be paying rent to help out my parents. But I would also have more money since I’d be working more, and I’d be saving up for eventually transferring.
I’m just very torn what direction to go in. Both are great choices with their own challenges but I’m just not sure that the cost of going straight to college rather than CC is worth it.

A common theory is that Jen has the ability of power disruption through either nullifying or amplifying them.
One of the first examples is the end of season 1 where Luke (flying guy) struggled to fly after Jen rejected him. Some think that Jen subconsciously “turned off” his flying power because she was more confident and her power may be related to her emotions, while others argue that it was simply a gag and that getting rejected by her made him more insecure and thus unable to fly.
It could also be argued that Jizzlord turned back into a human through Jen’s supposed nullifying power, but on the other hand, I’ve also seen people say he turned human because he simply felt comfortable around Jen when he was a stray cat.
On the amplification side, the most clear scenario is when Jen met Hannah (late bloomer, teleporting woman) at the power clinic. After spending a day with Jen, she had gained the ability to teleport. I think this is the clearest example, but to play devil’s advocate, maybe Hannah’s power came out because she just felt more empowered after commiserating with Jen over having no powers. Or maybe it joke and the whole thing was coincidental and Jen just got unlucky.
Another example is Kash getting his powers changed with gaining the ability to move forward in time. Again, this may be due to proximity to Jen’s power, or it could be from Kash going through an emotional time after Carrie broke up with him. Jen’s step-dad, Ian, also gained enhanced abilities where he can now have 2 people feel each other’s emotions through physically touching him, but it is unknown if this has anything to do with Jen.
So on one hand, Jen may have been responsible in manipulating these people's powers, but on the other hand, the changes in their powers may be due to the characters' mental states, and Jen really does not have powers or has a totally different and unrelated power.
I think this opens a lot of interesting doors. Maybe Jen’s power has nothing to do with disruption and she will instead get the ability to summon burritos or some other random joke power. This thread says she may be immortal, which would also be interesting.
I’m personally of the opinion that her power is power disruption, it’s related to her emotions, and that she may have accidentally been nullifying her own power. I think it would make sense with her character struggling with grief, emotional volatility, and selfishness. Maybe she’ll get a better handle of these issues and her powers as her character develops.
I think this would also make a nice resolution. If she can disrupt powers, she could capitalize on this ability and make a living off of nullifying the more harmful powers we’ve seen (her boss aging backwards, the guy who makes people “finish” by touching them, Jizzlord getting stuck as a cat) and amplifying the more helpful ones. Maybe she could work at a power clinic, but one that isn’t as messed up as the one she went to lol.
What do you think?
TL;DR: Some people think Jen might be able to disrupt people’s powers, while others think their powers were disrupted due to the characters’ own mental states. Could be either.
View Poll

hi i’m an 18 year-old solo traveler and i have a 9hr layover in Haneda from 3pm to 12am. was wondering how the system works: do i have to collect my checked bags and how does checking in again work? i booked the entire trip through United but the flights are operated by ANA. also, are the storage for carry-on luggage convenient? should i take a taxi or subway into the city? has anyone done this before and how easy was the overall process?
would really appreciate any itinerary ideas too. hoping to go to shibuya/ginza. thanks!!

Take em away, boys.

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Synopsis:
Juliette Contzen is a lazy, good-for-nothing princess. Overshadowed by her siblings, she's left with little to do but nap, read … and occasionally cut the falling raindrops with her sword. Spotted one day by an astonished adventurer, he insists on grading Juliette's swordsmanship, then promptly has a mental breakdown at the result.
Soon after, Juliette is given the news that her kingdom is on the brink of bankruptcy. At threat of being married off, the lazy princess vows to do whatever it takes to maintain her current lifestyle, and taking matters into her own hands, escapes in the middle of the night in order to restore her kingdom's finances.
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Action, Fantasy, Copious Ohohohohos.
Chapter 241: Until Now
The doors to the Hartzwiese Adventurer’s Guild opened.
Before, the sound of raucous laughter could be heard flooding the street outside, filling the quiet of a spring night with all the debauchery the local drunkards had to offer.
Despite the halls of adventurers not being formal drinking establishments, those within were ready to compete in boisterousness with all the taverns, inns and pubs of the town combined. And also win. Handily.
And yet–
The moment the doors parted and I stepped within, a hush as quiet as any grave fell over its inhabitants.
A woman balancing with her derrière upon the head of another became still, the alcohol in her cup the only movement as it dribbled onto a stunned face below her.
A man slurping from the communal cauldron stared wordlessly, the stew pouring in, and then out of his mouth as the muscles of his throat forgot the means to swallow.
A bartender asleep upon a row of kegs quietly rose, the sudden din of silence waking him where the sound of debauchery and those drinking from the taps beside him had failed.
Here, there, and everywhere, eyes widened as the sudden silence was filled with the sounds of my footsteps as I strolled past, my loyal handmaiden and my brother’s attendant in my wake.
And also–
Mreow.
Mrewowow.
Meww.
Cats.
Tabby cats.
Calico cats.
Ragdoll cats.
Cats with twirly whiskers. Cats with puffy faces. Cats with slightly rounded ears.
Behind me, skipping around my legs while taking turns to sit upon my shoulders and very occasionally my head, were a legion of cats of various shapes, sizes and colours.
But no matter the springiness of their whiskers, the shine of their coat or the liveliness of their tails, one thing to bring them all together was the anarchy they caused.
This was no neat line of ducklings following after their mother.
This was a barbarian horde.
With no sense of organisation other than a shared drive to claim everything as their own, they immediately skipped amidst the stunned adventurers, scavenging for all the copious scraps while still turning their noses away from the alcohol forming sticky traps upon the floor.
Saying nothing, I allowed their demanding cries to fill up the hall as I swept forwards, pausing before a wall plastered from end to end with faded notices and requests long gone unanswered.
One by one, I systemically tore every request featuring a crudely drawn image of a cat, gathering into my arms a pile of parchment large enough to reach my chin.
Then, I made my way to the wooden desk.
A receptionist waited with a smile at the ready.
“Greetings! Welcome to the Hartzwiese branch of the Adventurer’s Guild. I see you’ve removed several notices from the–”
Poomph.
Silenced but unperturbed, this latest clone watched as I dropped the stack of requests onto her desk, before promptly topping off the stack with a copper ring.
“Do what must be done,” I said, my voice defiant. “I am ready.”
The receptionist answered me with a smile more permanent than the wall the notices were torn from.
A moment later–
“[Identify].”
A green hue appeared in her clasped palms as she assessed the ring.
“Juliette. B-rank. Your registered branch is Reitzlake.”
The sound of several cups clattered against the floor.
“Welcome again to Hartzwiese. I see from your commission history that you have an extraordinary amount of completions for recovering lost cats. May I assume the significant number of cats now roaming the branch hall relate to the notices removed from the wall?”
I pursed my quivering lips.
“Maybe.”
“Wonderful. And how many cats is it that you’ve rescued?”
“... Lots.”
“I see. Please give me a moment while I confirm the requirements of our commissions.”
The receptionist swiftly retrieved a stack of parchment from a drawer.
As she flicked through, her eyes simultaneously went to every cat roaming, napping and clawing in the hall. A skill not even monstrous overseers from the abyss with their dozens of eyestalks could match. But that’s only to be expected.
Wherever these receptionists were found, it was from a level deeper than any monster dared roam.
Eventually, she gave a nod.
“Thank you for waiting. There appears to be an excess of cats in relation to the number of commissions we have available. We’ll endeavour to ensure that every cat is rehomed at the earliest opportunity through our partner agencies and charities. But unfortunately, I can only provide official acknowledgement for cats rescued through a formal commission.”
I sucked in a deep breath, hoping that patience was one of the things I accidentally inhaled.
“Fine. And how many commissions does that end up being, then? … 10? 15?”
The receptionist flicked through her bundle of parchments once more.
“94.”
“... Excuse me?”
“I can confirm the successful completion of 94 simultaneous F-ranked commissions. Congratulations. This is a new record, breaking what appears to be one earlier set by yourself. A remarkable achievement befitting a B-rank member of the guild.”
The receptionist’s professional smile never wavered.
I thought that would be the worst of it.
But then–
She slowly brought her hands together … and started applauding.
It was the leak which broke the dam.
At once, she was joined by all who were present to witness this crowning moment of regret.
I turned around in time to see a riot in motion.
“W-Wooooooooooo!!!!”
“In … Incredible …”
“A new record … I … I heard it was broken in Trierport … to think I’d witness it broken again!”
“A B-rank adventurer … ?! Where … Where did she come from … ?!”
There was no polite, respectful applause here.
It was the wild cheering of a crowd at a tournament. The whooping cries of theatregoers calling for an encore. The acclaim of my father as he elbowed others to delight in the poetry I’d written when I was 6 and thus now regularly attempted to burn.
Everywhere I turned, I saw and heard the acclaim mixed with shouts of horror as mugs of alcohol were spilled on purpose and by accident. The layabouts stomped on the floor, doing their best to murder decorum under the strain of unbridled emotion.
Only a few falling teardrops formed any hint of more dignified revelry, the glimmer of admiration running down cheeks as sniffles were hidden amidst the raucous cheering.
And then I bore witness to the most morbid sight.
Like a tidal wave of soiled clothes and snotty faces, they suddenly came as one, hands reaching out for me with dripping mugs still in their grips. Horror struck at my soul. And unlike a farmer who’d scarpered into the night, I had nobody who could heal a wound caused by hooligans accepting me as their own.
“A-Amazing!! Take my drink! Take anyone’s drink!!”
“So many cats rescued … even my allergies can’t believe it!”
“My gods, it’s a legend! An adventurer among adventurers!”
This.
This right here.
This was the lowest point of my life … were I not an unparalleled genius.
“Oho … ohoho …”
At once, the wave halted.
Faces which were lit up in unabashed delight turned to looks of mild confusion against the tinkling music of my laughter.
They needed to cycle through the expressions until they reached horror and shame.
“Ohhohohohohohoho!!”
… For I was no drunkard seeking to join their ranks!
No … I was Juliette Contzen, 3rd Princess to the Kingdom of Tirea!
And that meant every action I took, every word I spoke, and every cat I saved was for a reason beyond the hopes and dreams these hoodlums had of wanton debauchery and rusting swords!
Indeed!
A lesser princess than I may slink away into the night, cowed by the utter shame, humiliation and disgrace of completing so many F-ranked requests that I somehow broke a record I’d only just set!
But I was made of greater things!
Of schemes and subterfuges so deep that it would take too long to explain! The plots I weaved were a silken web more intricate than any cogs which made up Coppelia as she doubled up, desperately trying to stop herself from succumbing to more pain from laughter!
And that meant with every cat request now denied to these louts … they would finally do some work!
“Ohoho … ohohohohoho!! Behold and be afraid! Witness before you the coming of a new dawn, here to lift you from your days of boundless reverie! Unfurl the shutters and gaze upon a radiance so pure it brands your dallying minds! The scorching sun has come to test the snail’s back, and all that your bleary eyes see is a great salt lake to devour you whole! Shrivel as you cling upon the sweat which drips upon your brow, for that is the proof you’re yet alive!”
A sudden silence met my proclamation of their coming ordeal.
And then–
“Wooooooooooooooooooooooo!”
“I don’t understand! But what a speech!”
“If she can do it, so can we!”
I raised a hand to my lips, barely covering my smile.
“Ohhhohohohohohohoho … !”
Here it was!
Operation: Gainful Employment!
An entirely new strategy, as bold as it was uncharted!
By removing what was surely the vast majority of missing cat quests available to the adventurers of this town, they would have no choice, utterly none whatsoever, but to engage in actual work! The type of work adventurers openly advertised themselves as doing!
Monster subjugation! Crime prevention! Fetching artifacts from hidden dungeons and then succumbing to their wounds at the entrance while the Royal Treasury pocketed the treasure!
Yes, this was clearly a highly experimental tactic.
But what was I, if not a bastion of creativity?
At the very least, I utterly refused to accept the status quo! An organisation dedicated exclusively to rescuing lost cats or elbowing into my kingdom’s sovereign affairs was no good to me!
Thus … I could not cower like some towngirl nauseous from the smell of their revelry.
Instead, I would squeeze the Adventurer’s Guild dry until the day I replaced them with an army of trained poodles. Until that joyous day, I could never tear my eyes away when they waited to be robbed.
To do so was more than a dereliction of duty …
Why, I’d be an accomplice to their drunken escapades!
My vow remained unchanged. For my goal, I would brave any indignity. The ring I was hoping the receptionist would forget to return was proof of that.
And thus–
I stood tall as a summer reed, proud in the knowledge that I had no need to feel even an inkling of embarrassment over completing 94 simultaneous F-ranked commissions! …
“Pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft.”
“S-Stop at once! You are not to laugh!”
“Pffffttt~”
“C-Coppelia!!”
Clearly not seeing the angel of self-sacrifice who I was, Coppelia held one hand tightly around her mouth. Even so, she failed to stop either the sound of her amusement or the tears falling from her eyes.
My only salvation was that it came at significant cost to her. Even now, she careened between laughter and painful regret.
I decided to offer both her and myself mercy.
Turning to the receptionist, I found a modest pouch already waiting upon the wooden desk. As well as a copper ring waiting beside it.
“Thank you for your service to the Adventurer’s Guild,” said the receptionist, her professional smile undaunted by the commotion. “Your total remuneration is 102 gold crowns, 7 silver crowns and 9 copper crowns. I’ve taken the liberty to compile all your separate payments together.”
I took the pouch and ignored the ring.
The receptionist pushed the ring forwards.
A long moment later, I collected it, uncertain what a receptionist would do if I tossed it into the communal cauldron, but knowing it would somehow still end up on my finger regardless.
With my head held high, I bravely ignored the chorus of voices unknowingly cheering for their own hardship as I swept past. Renewed tears and applause filled the hall. A few cats attempted to follow me. I stopped to shoo them away.
And then I was outside, the door closing behind me.
“... Goodness, that was quite the sight,” said Renise with a bemused smile. “It reminded me somewhat of the inns of Reitzlake’s docks. I wonder if all the halls of adventurers are like that, or merely those which you frequent?”
“Please don’t insinuate I’m responsible for the debauchery which occurs wherever the Adventurer’s Guild is concerned. That’s something I can claim no credit for.”
“You say that … but to me, it seems that you caused quite a stir. That really is a remarkable number of cats you rescued, after all. Even I can tell that 94 simultaneous F-ranked commissions–”
“Miss Renise.”
The maid’s smile wavered against whatever fatigued expression I was making.
A moment later, it fell away entirely as she switched to her role as my brother’s attendant and the leader of whatever scoundrels he’d charged her with herding.
“... Yes, I suppose there’s time for idle conversation later. There’s a guardhouse nearby. We should report on all that’s happened tonight.”
I gave a nod of agreement.
Hopefully, the baroness hadn’t woken from her stupor yet. But if she had, I was certain the single portrait of myself I’d returned to the wall of her gallery to smile down at her gagged and bound state would calm her nerves.
Renise hummed towards the direction of Hartzwiese’s centre, before returning her attention to me.
“If you wish to keep your identity incognito, I can see guards sent to where they’re needed using my own authority, and arrange for the appropriate seizure of the goods and crowns we’ve discovered.”
I beamed at once.
My, so prudent! It’s little wonder she was chosen by Roland!
“A judicious offer. And one I’ll accept gladly, providing the burden isn’t too severe.”
“This is merely an administrative task, and little burden compared to what both yourself and Miss Coppelia regularly perform. In any event, it is only efficient. I expect I’ll be spending a significant amount of time at the baroness’s farmstead. It is quite extensive. If possible, I would like to make use of it for Rose House. I imagine having such a facility close to the Granholtz border would have its uses.”
I nodded, already forgetting the barn’s existence.
“I encourage you to use your discretion as required. My brother has put his trust in you, and so I both expect and know that you shall not disappoint in furthering the kingdom’s prosperity.”
The young woman smiled. One filled with appreciation, but also lacking ambition.
Good.
An excellent combination as far as retainers were concerned.
“Thank you. Although I worry you place too much trust in my abilities. In truth, those like Baroness Arisa would have made for a greater asset to the kingdom. Her resourcefulness must be acknowledged.”
“It is not resourcefulness my kingdom requires. It is loyalty. And hers is a pit so empty it drains others.”
“That’s true. But at least we were able to acquire some useful things from her nonetheless.”
Renise pulled out a tiny vial from the belt around her thigh.
A golden liquid was stored within, glimmering with an unnatural light.
“These were in her chamber,” she said, her eyes lacking emotion as she surveyed the bright liquid. “When we met, she actually attempted to purchase my loyalty with this.”
“A suspect vial. How quaint. And what miracle did she promise?”
“One that would wake my parents from their curse of eternal slumber.”
“... And is it?”
“I don’t believe so, no. This is one of many identical vials I found in her chamber’s desk drawer. All prominently labelled with instructions to only drink as required to stave off the effects of bloating.”
Renise returned the vial to her belt with a slightly embarrassed smile.
“It’s still useful,” she admitted. “But just not for what I require.”
I gave a simple nod as my reply.
Nothing else needed to be said.
She hoped to see her parents wake from their prison of dormancy. An understandable wish. And one I wasn’t required to supplement with the comment that no pair named the Smuggler King and the Smuggler Queen were likely to receive as light a sentence as their daughter.
I could not speak on behalf of Roland. Although I imagined that as a kind man, he would prefer not to pass judgements which were total. But as the Crown Prince, he did not have the luxury of kindness.
It would take much to change their fate.
But perhaps that’s why Renise was here, still proving true, and not accepting stomach ailment potions from a baroness.
A moment of silence followed.
Renise gave a short sigh. And that was that.
She set her eyes on the task ahead–at least until whatever words she’d parted her mouth to say were interrupted by Coppelia’s humming instead.
“Sooooooooooooooo … you just want to wake up two people eternally sleeping, right?”
A small smile met her optimistic voice.
“If a cure were readily available, I’m certain I would have found it by now. I believe one might be possible, but it would take skill and ingredients beyond any apothecary I know of.”
“Well, sure, you could go that way. But what about going straight to the source instead?”
“The source?”
“Sure. They’re asleep, right? So just ask the one in charge of where they are now.”
“I’m … not quite sure I follow?”
Coppelia clapped her hands together and beamed.
“The Spring Court is the realm of dreams. Chances are, they must have shown their faces around a few times by now. If you ask the Spring Queen nicely, she might do you a favour.”
“The Spring Queen? … The fae?”
“Mmh~ luckily, we have someone with connections here!”
Renise was startled out of her reply.
It was nothing compared to me. The one being pointed at.
“Coppelia!” I said, truly aghast at the suggestion. “The fae are not to be taken lightly. Why, I still have nightmares about my conversation with the Winter Queen! I learned a side to royalty that day which I shall never forget … and I’m quite poorer for it!”
“You met … the Winter Queen?” asked Renise, her eyes suddenly wide.
“Unfortunately, yes, but I had zero intention of meeting her, and I’ve just as little intention of meeting any other fae as well. Including the Spring Queen.”
I waved away the coming query to declare what was just as important as my lack of enthusiasm.
“Besides, I’ve not the foggiest idea how I would even hope to use these supposed connections I have.”
“Oh, that’s the easy bit,” said Coppelia, her casual disregard for what counted as ‘easy’ more terrifying than any lout I’d met today. “The hard part is getting them to do what you want. But meeting them? The fae are creatures of stories. If the time is right, they’ll speak to you–one way or another.”
“Then they must book an appointment. One which I can formally reject.”
“I mean, I don’t think you have much choice. You didn’t last time, right?”
“The last time, I was sat beside the Winter Queen’s crown. I see no fae artifacts to hook me away. And that means utterly no scenario in which I could be abducted without my express–”
I suddenly stopped, clasping my hands around my mouth.
A moment later, I raised my arms in a martial art I’d just invented, turning repeatedly on the spot.
Renise blinked at me.
“Excuse me, but what are–”
“Shhshhshh!!”
I paused, gazing intently around at the quiet, dark streets of Hartzwiese, all the while ignoring Coppelia’s giggling at my near miss.
That … That was close!
“O-Oho … oho … I almost invited something terrible. Truly, it’s perhaps best not to needlessly voice things which Fae Queens and their deviant brand of magic could use …”
Coppelia nodded at me, as proud as she was clearly disappointed.
“You’re lucky. If the Spring Queen had a sense of humour, she’d have snagged you right there and then.”
“No. If the Spring Queen had a sense of humour, she’d wait until–”
Click.
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Hey there,
I know a lot of the fifo peeps are going to say “get a real trade” but this is more of a question regarding what I am seeing on seek.
Why are there so many Dump Truck Jobs advertised, some of them literally say “Dump Truck Operator x12” but I never see any Traineeships offered? Is there a reason?. Like I see a lot of jobs for it but it seems there’s no trained up people for it.
I don’t work FIFO but I was just curious so don’t blast me.
👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼