Dirty dares for your boyfriend

tldr at bottom. My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without traffic, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since. I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted. I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore? tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.

My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without trafique, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since. I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted. I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore? tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.

tldr at bottom.
My Ex and I started dating about a year ago. The relationship was pretty good up until we started college. Although we still lived in the same city she had to move to a neighborhood that was 2 hours away (without traffic, which normally made the trips double that) from where we lived. To add insult to injury, both of us chose mayors that demand a lot of time and effort. This made it so that we could only really see each-other on the weekends. Which was normally a really amazing time. Sadly the demanding nature of our majors made it so that every second we spent with each-other was a second we didn't spend lessening our workloud. Which I think over time created this dynamic in which we both loved each-other but also resented each-other for taking precious time we could've used elsewhere. Communication was very difficult because she absolutely hated talking over the phone or over text-message. She still did it because she loved me, and I appreciated that very much, but the conversations over text were robotic and the phone calls were really strange because she went into an almost trance-like state in which it was possible to talk to her but it was almost like she wasn't really there. This ties into a larger issue which was that (as best I can describe it) she had fog in her head and it was very difficult even for her to navigate it. This made it hard to have conversations with her that were not about films (because she loved films :) ). This and other issues that I will not delve into made suggest that she should go to therapy. I never tried to come off in a mean way as I myself am in therapy. She wasn't very happy with the idea We managed to survive our first semester together. although we fought a lot through it. Problems really started after the winter vacations ended and we restarted school. Maybe it was the fact that I felt really disconnected from my Ex, or maybe it's because I'm just a disloyal piece of shit, but I started to like a girl I had class with. This girl also had a boyfriend so I convinced myself that we could just be friends. This girl and I could talk for hours without the conversation feeling dry. And to be honest she was really scratching an itch my Ex couldn't. I started to feel less love for my Ex (and frankly I became a lot less patient with her) and to get my attention she started to do really immature things (that she had never up to this point). I understood even back then that this actions were just the result of her trying to get my love back or at least my attention, but still it put further strain in the relationship and after a month in which we tried everything to make the relationship work; and in which we started to increasingly fight over stupid shit and treat each other worse and worse. I realized that I was not being truly faithful to her and that the relationship wasn't working and it wasn't fair for her to be putting her effort into a relationship in which I wasn’t putting the same effort or loyalty so I broke up with her I a very cold way (I thought that would make it easier on her) and frankly I just didn’t know how go about it. The fact that I just can’t be alone made it so that I started to get really obese over this other girl. She still had a boyfriend of course. But hey that's just a minor inconvenience when you are trying desperately to run from your feelings. Clases ended and both things ended with them, first I stopped seeing the other girl and second all the workload that had distracted me up until this point had spotted so all the emotions I had been avoiding hit me like truck and I started to feel really lonely and so (in a selfish moment of weakness) I wrote to my Ex, that I had a few things of hers and if she wanted them. She said yes, and so I went to her house. There it surprised me to see how unmad she seemed to be with me (I cannot stress how angry and sad she was when we broke up) she even asked me how I was doing. We started talking and she revealed she started going to therapy. We talked about everything, really, the relationship, how our lives had been, random assfuck topics. It was nice talking to her without all the baggage, stress and expectations that our situation had placed upon us. We both made it kinda clear that we didn’t think getting back together was a good idea, and she also told me that she understood why we had to break up. At some point I asked her if it would be wrong to kiss her but she said it wasn't and we kissed. things started to escalate but before things got out of hand she said that she would only fuck me if promised we would talk afterwords. Otherwise she would feel really stupid and used. Her words not mine. I said that I would love to talk to her. and so we fucked and afterwas we talked as if we were still together heck better than when we were still together. We were hugging naked and intermediately kissing and I just felt so at home that I realized how much I missed her and our relationship. Afterwards she said she had to leave and I agreed. We talked a bit on the phone but we stopped. And we haven't talked since.
I miss her and I know I have no right to, frankly, how dare I act like I even care about her after I spent almost half a month chasing another girl. I feel so guilty and honestly disgusted with myself. I just never thought I could be this much of a selfish asshole. A part of me really wants to go back to her and just be together again. Another part of me (the rational and humane one) knows that it would just fall to pieces and hurt her more and again. I don't think I deserve this girl after how I acted.
I guess I just wanted let off steam and process everything but I also want to know what I can do to get over her so I don't hurt her anymore?
tldr: I had girlfriend. Long distance and stress got in the way of our relationship. I started liking another girl. This was the straw that broke the camels back. We broke had an ugly break-up. Recently I saw her and it rekindled some of my feelings. I feel very guilty and I don't know how to act. Please someone help me.

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Sofia, honey, please wake up' mum mind links as I stir in my sleep. I moan, not wanting to wake up. Why would mummy want to wake me up in the middle of the night? Maybe she didn't say anything and I'm just dreaming about this whole thing. I sign and roll over, sleep overcoming me. 'Sofia, please' I groan, trying really hard to wake up. She doesn't sound too happy with me. 'What's wrong mummy?' I ask her, still half asleep. 'Sofia, you need to get up and run. We're under attack from a rogue pack. Your father and I managed to hide your sister away somewhere safe but we can't get to you' 'Where are you, mummy?' 'The other side of the house baby. I tried to get to you and I was so close but a rogue got to me before I could reach you and knocked me out. I'm tied up. There's too many of them so I need you to get out of bed and run away from here as fast as you can. Use the door in daddy's office and the tunnels to get out. Run to one of the neighbouring packs and when you get there tell them what happened and then wait there for us to come and get you. Do you understand my love?' 'Yes, mummy.' 'Good girl. I love you Sofia.' 'I love you too mummy.' 'Run sweetheart.' 'Yes, mummy' I reply as a tear slips down my face. I sit up quickly and reach over to my bedside table. I fumble my hand around in the dark, trying to find my hearing aids. My hands connect with the cold plastic and I grab them and put them in as my bedroom light turns on and I come face to face with two large men. Rogues. I study them for a split second, frozen in place. Maybe I will blend into the duvet if I'm still enough. The man on the left is taller than the man on the right. Both of them have dark hair and black eyes, a mixture of dirt and blood covering their bodies. I bite my lips, trying to hold back a scream. "Hello there, sweetie," the man on the left says in what I hear as a mumble. I whimper as they get closer, still frozen with fear. "What's your name?" the other one asks with an evil grin. I shake my head and shuffle back against my headboard. 'Mummy?!' I mind link. No answer. 'Daddy? Please?' Still no answer. "I said what's your name girl?" the man asks again, his voice rising, anger clear in his tone. I whimper and point at my hearing aids, more tears falling down my cheeks. The men look at each other before looking back at me. "Are you deaf?" The one on the left asks loudly, his smile darkening. I whimper again and nod. He grins at the other guy before looking at me. "How old are you?" he grunts. Not wanting to make him any angrier, I shakily hold up eight fingers. "Oh, this should be fun," he says chuckling as he walks over to me. A scream manages to finally escape my throat, more tears rushing down my face as I curl up into a ball in terror. The man stops for a moment and pulls out some black leather gloves from his back pocket. He puts them on before pulling out a pair of silver handcuffs. My heart stops. Daddy told me what silver does to werewolves. It burns their skin and causes them pain. It's meant as a means of torture. Suddenly, he grabs my hands, yanking my arms behind my back as he turns me around, cuffing me. The silver burns into my skin. Just as daddy had warned me. I scream out in pain, sobs falling from my lips and he does the same with my ankles before taking the gloves off. I continue to cry, not daring to move as it will make the burns worse. Deathly still, I watch as the shorter of the two men walks over to me, an evil smile spread across his face. He proceeds to pick me up and carries me in his arms towards the door and out of my room. I start screaming again, thrashing and kicking to try and loosen his grip on me but it only makes the burns worse. I lull in my attempts to break free, knowing now that it will only cause me more pain. A pain worse than I have ever felt before. All of a sudden, we stop and the taller man turns around and walks up to the rogue and I. He looks at me grinning and touches my hearing aids. Oh no, he's noticed them. "You won't need these where we're going" he snarls loud enough for me to hear him clearly, still smiling. Time slows down as he rips my hearing aids out of my ears, dropping them on the ground and stomping on them. Crushing them into a million pieces. I proceed to sob even harder as the dull ringing fills my ears. The pain of the burns starts to take over and I start to see black spots. 'Mummy?' I try mind linking again. Nothing. I really hope she and daddy and Claire are okay. My eyes start to flutter and the last thing I see is the back of the other man as we walk out the door and towards a car. I whimper one last time before everything turns black.
TEN YEARS LATER
I weakly pace around my tiny cell, trying to keep myself awake. I haven't eaten in two days and I'm surprised my wolf and I are still hanging on after all this time. This dirty, disgusting cell I have been trapped in for more than half of my life.
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Chapter 2
I look up and see a guard watching me with a smirk on his face. He says something but all I hear is muffled noises. But that's all I ever hear so I'm used to it. He walks up to my cell and unlocks it and I know I'm about to be beaten again when suddenly, the ground shakes. I look up to see the guards start to panic and run out of the room, leaving my cell wide open. Now's my chance. I've been waiting for so long to escape and now is finally the time. I send a silent thank you prayer to the Moon Goddess before stumbling out of my cell and out the door. I walk through the office and over to the window to see a fight outside. The whole rogue pack is fighting what looks and smells like to be another rogue pack. I take one last look before slipping out of the door and into the forest without anyone noticing me. I run. Fast. I feel my wolf getting a tiny bit stronger as I run through the forest, the fresh air filling my lungs. I haven't left that tiny cell in ten years and now I am free. It's honestly too good to be true. I know I have to keep moving or they will find me. I continue to feel my wolf get stronger and begin to surface as I continue to run, trees whipping past me. After a while, I stop for a moment and feel myself begin to shift as my wolf takes over my body completely. I scream out in pain, my bones cracking and popping and I feel my dirty rags rip to shreds. God, it was just as painful as the first time it happened. Hopefully it gets easier the more I do it. I quickly dig a hole and paw in the shreds to hide the evidence of me being here before covering it up and taking off again. My wolf lets out a happy growl and runs faster. It feels nice to let my wolf out again after I first shifted. I shifted about a year ago, I think, in my tiny cell and they screamed at me and I shifted back out of fear. I then got beaten and tortured and that made my wolf disappear. I haven't felt her in so long which is understandable due to everything that has happened. But now I know she's still there which is good. I continue to run, having no clue where I'm going but that doesn't matter. As long as I get away from that horrible place, I'll be fine.
I've been running for maybe about an hour, I'm not really sure. I feel like I haven't gotten anywhere. The rogue base must've been hidden out in the middle of nowhere because honestly, I haven't come across a single wolf pack territory yet. Or at least I don't think I have. All I know is that I'm not on the rogues land so either it's neutral land or a wolf pack's territory, both of which I find terrifying. I can feel my wolf starting to get tired but I know that the rogues will have discovered that I'm missing so I need to keep moving. I can't get caught. I won't let myself get caught. I can't go back to that hell hole now that I'm free. God only knows what Zane will do to me if he does catch me. I shiver at the thought. I must keep running.
I think I've been running for what seems like hours now and I'm exhausted. To be honest, I'm can't believe I'm still going. I'm surprised I'm still alive even today after everything that I've been through over the years. I know if I had been human then I definitely would have died a while ago. I continue to run, although I feel myself starting to slow down once again, my wolf growing more tired by the second. At this point, I don't know how many territories I've crossed. My wolf senses have gotten weaker, become almost non-existent from being locked in my cell with silver chains and wolfsbane injections for so many years so I'm finding it harder to tell. Either that or packs have gotten better at masking their scent nowadays, but I highly doubt that. I can't tell how many I've been through, I'm just glad I haven't been caught by anyone yet. I slow down a bit more to catch my breath when suddenly something flashes past in the corner of my eye. Whatever it is, it was gone as quickly as it arrived. Inhaling deeply, the faint smell of wolf hits my nose. Oh shit. Panic sets in and I instantly pick up my pace but I am quickly tackled to the ground by another wolf. I whimper, trying not to struggle too much because I know from past experience that if you struggle, you'll get beaten. There are always consequences for your actions. I close my eyes, another whimper escaping my throat and feel the weight suddenly disappear from me. I get up and slowly back towards a tree and the wolf gives me a funny look. Suddenly, two more wolves appear and stand next to the other wolf. I whimper again and continue to back slowly away until I hit the tree behind me. Losing my balance, I fall over and decide it's best to just stay on the ground as I'm absolutely exhausted. I look at the wolves and they stare back at me. The one that tackled me has a chocolate brown coat, while the one on its left has a sandy blonde coat and the one on its right has a pure white coat.

Thank you to all of you who have been following this story! Sorry about the delay in posting and responding to your messages, Matt and I actually had a weekend away together (chapter worthy material that I'll share down the road).
This chapter is another first for me, not for Matt. I had always been super self conscious about this one but Matt made it absolutely incredible and now a favorite part of our regular foreplay! I hope you all enjoy! As always, feel free to shoot me any feedback and critiques! ♡Avery
So this one kinda came out of no where. Not something we had really discussed because I was kinda self conscious about straddling a guy's face with my crotch, but I learned to get past all that. After work one Wednesday night...yes I remember the day because Matt and I had developed a routine at this point of alternating days at his house and days I spent in my barracks room. Anyway, one Wednesday evening, I had been driving Matt around on a convoy training mission all day. Alone in a truck with my hot as hell man crush boyfriend, and unable to do anything because we couldn't risk it at work. Of course he would spend it dropping little sly comments about "I bet you like xyz" or something like he doesn't know exactly what l like. Such a tease.
At this point, I've had enough and I just want him. I had showered and cleaned up before coming over, but the moment I walked in his door, I wanted to get dirty all over again. I pressed him up against the wall and pressed my lips to his. He grabs me by my petite waist and pulls me close as I wrap my arms around behind his neck and let my tongue intertwine with his.
I needed him. Like holy shit. I don't know what kind of mood he had put me in all day, but I needed my man and I needed to cum. He senses how frantic my kisses are becoming and he picks me up in his arms and carries me over to the futon in his living room. He lays me down and begins to suck on the soft spot of my neck, driving me wild as it's a mix of tickling and pleasure running through me. I run my fingers through his hair as I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him down between my legs until his growing bulge is pressed against me.
He slips his fingers under my shirt and lifts my shirt and blue neon sports bra over my head in one swoop. My B cup breasts spill out as his tongue finds it's way to my rapidly hardening nipples and I let out a slight sigh of pleasure. I pull his shirt off, exposing his chiseled chest and abs and I reach up to plant soft kisses against my favorite spot to rest my head at night. His kisses soon trail down my ribs as he unzips my short jean shorts revealing a small green cotton thong that leaves very little to the imagination.
I raise my butt and he quickly removes both shorts and thong in the blink of an eye, tossing them to the side as he returns to kiss along the tan lines made by the one piece bathing suit I wore over the weekend. I'm fairly soaked at this point and I just want release. Instead of giving it to me, he sits up, slips off his shorts and lays back himself. He tells me he wants me to sit on his face but face away so he has access to everything.
I'm super self conscious about "down there" to start with. Oral laying on my back is awkward enough but this was a definite first. He takes my hesitant pause to reach and pull me by the thigh over his face. I keep my weight up on my thighs so that I don't crush his face (awkward sauce like I said). Softly at first I feel his tongue tracing my slit as the tip of his nose occasionally brushes against my butt. I let out a soft moan and fall forward, opening myself up as my lips spread at the shift in position and my butthole is exposed as I find myself inches from his rock hard 7 inch cock...quick note on size...no I don't want a monster cock, 7 is about all I can take without having to worry about not sinking down too deep and hurting myself on accident. So no, I don't want your 11 inch dick.
Anyway, back to my face next to his rock hard cock. He takes another taste between my lips and teases gently at my clit as I take him in one hand and lick along the back of his shaft from tip to base. He's shaved himself to match my completely smooth pussy and I lick again and again along his hard smooth shaft.
He begins to pay more attention to my clit as he spreads my buttcheeks wide with his hands, exposing both of my holes to the cold air of the room. I'm practically dripping at this point as I take the head of his cock into my mouth, swirling my tongue around, trying to encourage him to do the same on my clit.
I feel a finger and then a second hook their way into my tight hole, tickling at my g spot as he pulls me down lower onto his face, increasing pressure on my clit with his tongue. This drives me to moan with his dick halfway into my mouth, and he bucks his hips up, forcing his way deeper into my throat. I feel myself start to gag, but the pleasure between my legs over rides everything and I force myself to take more and more of him until he is all the way down my throat and my lips reach the base of his cock.
I'm practically drooling saliva on his shaft as he bucks his hips into me, with his cock buried in my throat. I hold it there as long as I can until his thumb finds it's way to my clit, finally threatening to through me over the edge of a massive orgasm that's been building as we've gone along. I pull my face away, a string of drool leading off my chin and grind my vagina into his face as his tongue presses in circles against my clit and his nose is against my bum. I take his shaft in hand and begin to stroke him, using my own saliva to lubricate him as i go faster and faster, trying to get him to experience the same release I'm on the brink of.
I'm fully raised up, with my pubic bone grinding into his mouth as I finally reach orgasm and cum slightly into his mouth (I'm not a huge squirter but I do cum). I moan his name as I continue to jerk him until he shoots a massive spray of cum of his own up towards my face, some landing on my cheeks while the rest sprays my chest and stomach before coming down and landing on him as well.
Covered in each other's release, I get up and kiss him passionately on the lips, thanking him for this introduction to a new found turn on. He takes me by the hand and we walk naked upstairs to the shower to clean off before dinner...and maybe another round(;
Thank you so much for continuing to follow my story! As always, feedback and critiques are more than welcome! Look for lucky #7 coming out in the next few days! ♡Avery

Here I am with the age old question. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years and living together for almost a year. He is a slob, quite frankly. And I like things neat. Luckily we have a three bedroom house. We share one of them as our bedroom, one of them is my study, the third is a guest bedroom, and he has his “man cave” in the basement. So there’s a pretty good separation of spaces which already solves a big portion of this issue. I keep my space how I like and he keeps his space how he likes. But the common areas are a bit of an issue.
We do have a slightly “traditional” relationship. He does stuff like work on my car for me (but he’s also taught me how to do a lot of stuff for my car) and I prep meals that we can both eat throughout the week. But these are not strict rules; we both share our skills with each other in a way that is beneficial. However, I am struggling to maintain the house when he will not even put his dirty dishes in the dishwasher or put his dirty laundry into the hamper. He does it if I ask him to, but I am trying to find a way to share these responsibilities without having to ask him to do it or make a list.
So how do you set boundaries when it comes to cleaning? As an example situation, I’ll use the dirty dishes. I have lived with messy people before and tried the “just leave it” method where you just leave their dirty dishes on the counter and wait for them to clean it. But it has not worked in my past living situations or this one. Messy people just tend to ignore the pile of dishes. I even had one roommate who would leave her dishes for so long that she forgot they were hers and then would send out group texts saying “can you guys please do your dishes.” How do I set a boundary that says, “I am not going to do your dishes and I need you to do them”? I have outright said this, but he “forgets.” He is just not an orderly person and these tasks are so absent from his mind. But that does not mean he should not be responsible. What has worked for you?
And please, spare me the “dump him” comments. I love this man and I am committed to working on our issues as a team.

Skip to the fifth paragraph if you don't want to read about why I love my boyfriend.
I was bullied a lot as a child, and admittedly so because of my own faults; I would pull girls hair, I bit and hit other kids, and was generally an awful person to everyone, including my own family. The most awful thing I ever did was bully a girl for being fat, to the point she killed herself. After she did so, I was isolated, and shunned by many people in my village's community.
I felt alone, guilty, and hated, and in this bleak state I turned to contemplating suicide. I would climb the village's weir, and stare down at the water every day.
It was on one of my daily weir climbs that my future boyfriend waved up at me, and I waved back. He motioned me to come down, but he was on the other side of the river from me, and I didn't feel comfortable crossing on the weir, so I started walking back home.
Eventually, as I was walking back, I saw him running towards me. I asked him if he ran all that way here, to which he said no, and we both laughed. He told me I looked "gorgeous up on that dam", and it all escalated from there, he introduced me to poetry, and the poetry introduced me to the beauty of life. We then started dating, and we've been together for four years now.
Now, it was two weeks ago while we were having sex that I begged him to "breed me" as dirty talk, and he softly replied that he would if I was "white". I stopped and asked him if he was serious, and he said he didn't want to lie to me. He explained that he saw a white girl with an Indian guy, and it made him realise how "endangered the white race is". I told him I'm white too, but he said I have Greek blood, and therefore cannot be white. I tried to argue with him that racism is stupid, but he wouldn't budge.
He is literally everything I want in a man, and he saved me, so I started to cry. I asked him if he didn't want to be with me, or start a family with me, and he told me he does, but I have to let him have a "white family" too, so that he can do his part in "defending the white race". I spent hours begging him to just be with me, but like before, he wouldn't budge, and so I agreed to his ultimatum.
I regrettably vented to my mum about the situation, and she then told the rest of the family about it. My dad told me, either I leave my boyfriend, or I risk being cut off. Which is terrible for obvious reasons.
I don't particularly like my family, but I need their financial support, my room, and it just awfully feels like my past.
I love my boyfriend so much, he's so deeply mature for his age, despite all the racism. I need my family, or I'm going to struggle greatly. How do I keep them both?
I know you guys are going to tell me to leave my boyfriend, but our bond goes beyond all political correctness, so please just keep your opinions on his racism to yourself.
TLDR: Boyfriend saved me from killing myself, so I love him a lot. Boyfriend is afraid of white people going exinct, so he wants to have a white family, but he's willing to have one with me too. My family doesn't like this, and is threatening to cut me off.

I (f34) picked my boyfriend (m40) up from work on Saturday and he immediately was pressing me asking if something was up. I was fine and was listening to a buddhist podcast so I chuckled and told him I was fine. Then, someone cut me off on an on-ramp with multiple filter lanes and I said woah that was stupid, hopefully he doesn't end up wrapped around a lamp post - at this point my husband said 'you are being weird, pull over at the gas station' which is his code for wanting to buy booze. I said ok. He said and you can drop me off at home I don't want you around tonight. I said ok, can you give me gas money? I am broke and the gas to drive to your house and back is a lot... He started making a huge deal that I dared to ask him for gas money because he apparently gave me gas money several weeks ago. It is a 20 mile minimum round trip for me to do this and I do it multiple times a week. At this point I was like 'why are you picking a fight, is it because you want to drink alone? I don't need to come to your house so don't use it as a punishment'. He got angry right away and said I am an adult and can drink what I want. I don't give a F***. I don't give a F*** about what you think.
At this point my flight response got activated, he got out of the car and I said, fine make your own way home.
I drove off.
He texted me and said he would break up with me unless I immediately came and picked him up.
I went back and asked if he would let me in his house if I took him home, he laughed and called me a name and asked me to give him his food, so i threw it out of the passenger window at him. Then he started kicking my car and threw his food at it. I drove off. We had a heated exchange in messenger, where I told him to pay for an uber, he said he has friends and family and doesn't need me or uber, and now he has blocked me and told me it's over.
AITA??

Growing up my siblings and I were abused in various ways and there was also blatant favoritism shown for some siblings.
This post is going to be long. What’s important is there’s going to be a bunch of examples of our parents ruining fun in the name of “inclusion,” then allowing some of the worst exclusion ever.
Homeschooling parents are so creative in the nonsensical reasons they come up with for depriving their children of fun. Because we didn’t get to create social groups at school, my brother and I decided we wanted to have a club. Our dad got angry and originally said if we were going to have one then anybody in or outside our house had to be allowed in it, then later he outright forbade it at all AND forbade us from ever ASKING to create one!
About a couple years or so down the road our little sister decided she was going to have a club and not a peep from our father. One night our dad overheard my brother and me talking angrily and his gut told him we were talking about him. He asked and we pointed out the double standards with the club. Our dad got that wild narcissistic look in his eyes like, “How dare you be brave enough to address the forbidden white elephant in the room!” He said, “Because she was treated different!” In a sarcastic tone. Then he said, “Y’all don’t even WANT to know what I’m thinking about right now!” Basically we were supposed to be afraid of some severe punishment for bringing up the hypocrisy and not expect his rules to be logical or fair.
Once we had relatives fly in to visit from across the country. The family spent a few nights at our house but they also stayed elsewhere for a few nights also. It was a couple and their teenage daughter and I was also a teenage girl. They invited me to spend the night with them and have fun with their daughter. My little sister was nine years old. I was forced to include her in our teenage sleepover! I have heard from other people that that was completely inappropriate and that my parents should have found a way to entertain her while I was spending the night. I have heard an example from a completely different family where little sister was only 3 & 1/2 years younger than big sister and she was still told she was too little so mom and little sister did something fun just the two of them. I am about 6 & 1/2 years older than my sister in this story!
Not only did we have to censor our teenage conversations for a little kid, but she wasn’t even grateful! She had a sour look on her face most of the time and whined about things.
A lot of people commenting on the sleepover story said they just thought it was an example of my parents being too lazy to entertain my sister, but I think it was much more sinister than that. My gut was screaming that it was a way to “put me in my place,” and be like, “You just THOUGHT you were going to have a good time but you thought wrong!” By the way, my dad said, “You’ll be blessed for it!” It’s important for everyone to remember this nauseating inappropriate comment for later.
My brother was approximately twelve and he got a Nintendo 64. Our little brother was approximately four years old. My brother was never given the chance to be a good big brother and offer to share and play with little brother. Our dad immediately jumped in and demanded he let little brother play. There was a huge deal made and our dad lied to extended family about it. Once my little brother was playing the Nintendo so much that my aunt, my dad’s sister, told my dad that lil bro needed to do schoolwork instead of playing the Nintendo so much. My dad got so angry and told me he was at the same level of reading that I was at the same age. This is a load of bs because I know for a fact his reading comprehension at age seven was a train wreck and far behind mine at age five. Also, our dad had yelled at our mom for failing to teach him to read on time. He constantly changed the story and moved the goalposts to fit an agenda. In order to be a good liar you need to have a good memory!
Once my brother had loaned his Nintendo to some friends who were brothers and our dad screamed at him that he had loaned it to friends where little brother couldn’t play it. Imagine having so little agency over your own alleged birthday present that you can’t even loan it to friends because little brother needs to monopolize it at all times.
Ok so here’s the main part of the story to tie everything together…
As most of our lives were/are, as strict homeschoolers you’re not allowed to do hardly anything. If we obeyed all the rules and never snuck around, we would be a pack of 50-year-old virgins.
I started earning my own living, moved out of my parents’ home, and immediately got a boyfriend they didn’t approve of. There were huge screaming fights with my parents over the phone. The man and I eloped but then he filed for divorce before I could get my stuff moved to his home and actually live there full time. The guy was probably a predator but that was my parents’ fault for driving my self-worth into the dirt.
My sister, the one I was forced to include in the sleepover, got married after my ex was out of the picture and I had no contact with him. She got married and was allowed to exclude me from her bridal party even though she had both other sisters plus a few friends as bridesmaids. My aunt who is my mom’s sister knew that if the roles had been reversed and I tried to exclude all but one sister that all hell would have broken loose. She knew my dad would have refused to pay for the wedding. My cousin spoke up for me and said my sister was going to look like an ass for having the other two sisters but not me. My dad was furious and excluded her from attending the wedding just for saying that. It was the typical narcissist rage where they’re so furious at people for being brave enough to stand up to them. He said, “This is [sister’s] day! Everybody better behave!” When everybody knew if I had a wedding he was paying for he wouldn’t have gone on about it being my day, he would have said I had to include my sister or he wouldn’t pay for it!
This part is absolutely nuts. I was literally invited to the bridesmaids’ luncheon! I normally worked an extra job on Saturdays but I took off to come to the luncheon. My sister had just kicked a girl out for trivial reasons and I was hoping I was being asked to be the replacement. This was at my aunt’s house (dad’s sister) and she had a window seat type shelf near the entrance to her house with the gifts. As I entered I counted six gifts. There were five bridesmaids. I was seated at the table with the bride and the bridesmaids. That’s literally the only people at that table. When we were finished eating my sister distributed the gifts. I was hoping that sixth gift was for me and that she was asking me to be the other girl’s replacement. It turns out she had bought a gift for herself!!!!
My eyes welled up with tears. When I finally got home I cried for hours and hours, probably about eight hours. From bright daylight until the wee hours of the morning.
Later my cousin’s mom told my dad that it sounded like the cousin he had excluded from the wedding had gotten caught up in drama between me and my sister. He replied, “Well wherever [OP] is, drama’s not too far behind!”
If I had been the one who excluded my sister he would have said I was the one who had created the drama by excluding her. He would have said how awful and hurtful to exclude her and that she would be justified in crying about it. But since I was the one who was excluded I had created drama for crying about being left out.
Also it’s amusing how my little brother wasn’t “creating drama” for asking to play his big bro’s N64. It’s just ridiculous nonsensical rules that change depending on when he wants to favor one sibling over the other. Why was it so important that my sister’s wedding be the way she wanted even if it involved being cruel to me, but it wasn’t important for my brother’s Nintendo to be HIS Nintendo and he could gate keep who played it? Also interesting how he didn’t say the self-righteous garbage to my sister about, “You’ll be blessed for it,” by encouraging her to include me in her wedding.
My dad a couple years or so later commented that he was avoiding doing a particular favor for me because he didn’t want my sister to find out and hurt the relationship between us.
Also he inserted my sister into a conversation that has nothing to do with her and made the comment, “Now I know you don’t like [sister]…”. I would think if you were going to accuse a sibling of “not liking” the other one it would be the one who had inflicted cruelty on the other one. But he said it like I was a troublemaker for wanting to be loved and treated equally.
There was so much more hypocrisy and abuse but I’m tired writing this out and will probably just need to write a part 2.

September 25th, 2023 Phoenix, Arizona
It's been fifteen years since I made it away from the creature in Manistee National Forest. My therapist said that I need to write about it, but every time I do, I don't know how to start. She told me to go through some old things from that time in my life and see if it starts any gears moving in my mind. I found a journal I kept that I'd completely forgotten about. I flipped to that day of the camping trip 15 years ago and wrote an entry for all the days we were out there.
I'd just graduated with a bachelor's in Journalism and mass communications. It'd been years since I'd seen my best friends and we decided to go camping. I'd write in my journal every day. I would write at the end of my day or a few days later if I didn't have time the night before.
My hand is shaking just writing this part, and I haven't gotten to the actual meat of the story. Ugh, Meat. That word makes me shutter.
I'll type the journal entries here:
September 25th, 2008, Manistee National Forest, Michigan
It's a beautiful day here in Manistee National Forest. The sun is shining through the leaves of the trees, and a light breeze is rustling the leaves. The scent of pine needles is strong in the air, and the sound of a nearby creek adds to the moment's serenity.
We've set up camp, and our tents are scattered about, creating a small community amid this natural wonderland. My friends, Remy and Will, are already starting a fire, laughing and joking as they work together to build a blaze. I feel a sense of nostalgia wash over me as I watch them, remembering the countless times we've been on adventures like this one.
I look around, taking in the beauty of our surroundings. The trees are tall and robust, their branches reaching up towards the sky like reaching arms. The underbrush is a patchwork of ferns and wildflowers, swaying gently in the breeze. There's a small creek not far from our campsite, its water clear and calm, perfect for swimming or washing up.
I make my way over to the fire, joining Remy and Will. "Hey, guys," I say, my voice filled with excitement. "This place is unbelievable."
Remy looks at me, his signature grin spreading across his face. "Yeah, man. I can't believe you talked us into this. You know how Will here hates camping." We both laugh while Will just rolls his eyes.
"Well, I figured it'd be a great way to reconnect," I say, glancing at Will. "You know, since graduation and all." An awkward silence hangs between us for a moment, and I can feel the tension that's always there whenever we're together. There's this invisible barrier we can never entirely break through since I left for college.
Remy leans in close, lowering his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "So, Landon, have you heard from anyone else? You know, old friends and whatnot?" He glances knowingly at Will, who shifts uncomfortably beside the fire.
I feel my cheeks flush red as I look at Remy. "Well, uh, not really. You know how it is. We all sort of went our separate ways after high school." I change the subject to focus on something other than the tension between us. "So, have you guys been out here before?"
"Nah, this is Will's first time," Remy says, nudging him playfully. "But I've been wanting to bring him out here for ages. I've heard these woods are teeming with wildlife. You know, bears and shit like that." He laughs, but there's a slight edge to his voice.
Will looks unconvinced. "Yeah, right. Bears in these woods? You just want to scare me."
"No, seriously," Remy insists, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "There are black bears out here. We could even go on a hike and find some. You know, get up close and personal with nature."
I glance at Will and then look back at Remy. We should stick to the campsite for now. You know, just enjoy the weekend and relax." Will says.
"Ah, come on," Remy whines. "This is the perfect opportunity. You might never get another chance to see a bear in the wild." He looks challengingly at Will as if daring him to refuse.
I decide to change the subject again, not wanting the tension between them to ruin our weekend. "Hey, guys, you want to help me gather some wood for the fire?" I ask, gesturing toward a fallen tree nearby.
Will looks relieved at the change of topic. "Sure, I can help with that." He stands up and follows me to the log while Remy remains by the fire.
We spend the next hour chopping wood and stacking it by the fire. The air is filled with the rhythmic thud of axes striking wood and the sounds of nature around us. The sunsets cast the forest in a warm, golden light. It's a beautiful sight, and for a moment, it feels like we're all part of something larger than ourselves.
Will and I continue to work in companionable silence, our minds drifting to our thoughts. It's odd how things change after high school. We used to be inseparable, but now our lives have gone in such different directions. I can't help but wonder if we'll ever find our way back to that closeness we once shared.
As the sun dips below the horizon, we join Remy by the fire. He sees the wood we've stacked with approval and pulls a few logs from the pile to keep the fire going. The flames leap to life, casting flickering shadows across our faces and dancing along the tree limbs overhead.
"So, Landon," Remy says, his voice taking on a more casual tone now that gathering wood is done. "How's life been treating you?"
"Oh, you know. Work's been good." I pause momentarily, trying to find the words to explain how different our lives have become. "It's just weird, you know...we don't see each other as much anymore. Our lives have taken us in different directions, you know?"
Remy nods, his expression somber. "Yeah, I know what you mean. It's hard to keep up with old friends sometimes, especially when you're both so busy." He glances at Will, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "But it's good to have you both here together, even if it is just for the weekend."
I feel a pang of guilt as I look between them. I've been neglecting them, focusing too much on my life and career. I've always considered them my best friend, but maybe that's changed over the years.
We decide to go to sleep after hours of reminiscing around the campfire. The stars twinkle above us, and the sounds of the forest lull us into a peaceful slumber. As I lay in my sleeping bag, I can't help but wonder about the weekend ahead. I feel a sense of camaraderie with Will and Remy, but there's also an underlying tension that I can't quite put my finger on.
Suddenly, I heard what I assumed was an animal moving just outside the campsite. I stood up quick and looked around but saw nothing. Will and Remy were asleep, their breathing slow and steady. The air felt tense, and the forest seemed to whisper secrets that I couldn't quite make out.
I decide to walk over to the edge of the campsite to see if I can spot anything. As I step carefully through the underbrush, I notice another noise like before, like something moving fast. I look up, trying to catch sight of it, but I can only get a blur moving out of sight. It moves so fast that it's hard to see where it went.
I return to the campsite, shaken by the experience. Will and Remy are still asleep. The air feels tense, and the forest seems to whisper secrets I can't quite make out.
I decided to get back into my sleeping bag and hoped it was just my eyes playing tricks on me. But as I close them, I feel the same sense of unease creeps back in. The air feels thick like something is watching us, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. I can't help but wonder if there's something or someone out there that we should be worried about.
I'm going to try to get back to sleep.
September 26th 2008
We woke up and made some eggs and bacon that we'd brought in a cooler. The air was cool and crisp, and the forest took on a different hue since last night. There was an edge to it, a tension that we couldn't quite shake. As we ate, we talked about our plans for the day.
After breakfast, we packed our camp and started hiking deeper into the woods. The trees grew thicker, and the underbrush more dense. The air felt heavy with the scent of pine and damp earth. I couldn't tell if it was my paranoia about last night, but I could've sworn I kept seeing something darting just in the corner of my eye. I sighed in relief when Will mentioned it, too.
"Are you guys seeing that?" Will asks in a shaky voice.
My head quickly turns to him, and we make eye contact, a silent understanding of our fears.
"What are you talking about?" Remy snapped
"I keep seeing something dart out of my vision," I say
"That's what I'm seeing too!" Will says in an excited relief that quickly turns to fear once again.
We kept hiking silently as the woods grew denser and the air grew heavier. I could feel the tension in my shoulders, my muscles tensing up.
"I swear to god something is following us." Will whispers as he looks over his shoulders.
Remy laughs, trying to sound more confident than he feels. "Guys, come on. There's nothing out there; it's just nerves." But the way his eyes dart around, I can tell he's not entirely convinced.
We continue to hike deeper into the woods, the air growing heavier with each step. The underbrush is so dense that it's hard to see more than a few feet in front of us. I can feel the sweat starting to bead on my forehead.
We find a small clearing and set up camp again. We brought some firewood with us, so Remy started a fire immediately. The sun is beginning to set and I can tell Will is still on edge about what we saw while hiking. Remy keeps himself busy with the fire, and I can tell Will's uncertainty makes him weary.
"I'm going to take a shit over here so no one disturbs me," Will says as he points toward some bushes and gets up.
"Need any help?" Remy asks playfully, but Will does not react.
Remy and I silently sit by the fire before I ask, "Will seems a little on edge. Is everything okay?"
Remy looks at me, his eyebrow arches in confusion, "Do you not know?"
I stare at him in silence, shaking my head, confused.
"Dani and Will broke up last month. He's not really doing great right now." Remy informs me
The news shocks me. Will and Dani were inseparable in high school, almost annoyingly so. We would never be able to hang out with Will by himself. Dani made his way into our friend group by force through Will.
"Oh shit. I had no clue." I say
Will walks over as he rubs hand sanitizer between his hands. "What's for dinner, boys?"
Remy pulls out the cooler and opens it. He rummages a little bit before pulling out an ice pack. He looks confused and flustered as he frantically tries to find something in the cooler.
"It's empty," Remy says as he slowly looks up at us.
"Stop fucking around-" Will begins to say before we hear the rustling on the outskirts of the clearing, we all quickly turn our heads toward the direction.
There's a sudden silence as we all realize what's happening. Something, or someone, is stalking us.
Will stands up and screams, "Who the fuck is there? Come out, you fucking coward!"
Silence fills the forest as all animals and wind stop suddenly. Will's face melts into fear. We all sit in silence as we wait for something to happen. When nothing happens after a few minutes, Will turns around slowly and makes eye contact with me. Suddenly, something large, like a black wolf but far more significant and almost human as it stood on only two legs, quickly jumps out behind Will and digs its large knife-like claws into both his collar bones. It pulls Will back into the forest, and we hear his cries fade the further he is dragged.
Remy and I stare at the empty space that once held Will in horror. My heart is pounding out of my chest, and I feel like I can't breathe. Remy turns to me, his eyes wide with fear, "We have to go now. We have to leave."
I nod in agreement, unable to find my voice. We both stand up and quickly gather our things, looking around wildly as we decide which direction to go.
As we grabbed things, I heard a large thud outside the clearing where Will stood. Afraid to look, I signal for Remy as he stares at something in horror behind me. I'm still too scared to look, but I force myself. I couldn't tell what it was at first. There, tossed carelessly, lay a pile of skinned human limbs, a torso, and a head. The fleshless appendages were jumbled together in a chaotic mess, bones jutting out at odd angles and sinew glistening in the dim light. The head, stripped of its skin, bore vacant, eyeless sockets, its teeth bared in a permanent, macabre smile. The sight was horrifyingly surreal as if a butcher had gone mad in some twisted nightmare. The air was thick with the metallic scent of blood, a stench so overwhelming it made me gag. I couldn't tear my eyes away from the ghastly scene, every detail etching itself into my memory with sickening clarity.
Before we could say anything, a loud, lion-like roar filled the forest and echoed into my skull. I swear I felt the vibrations of the sound inside my head.
Remy grabs my arm, and we start running deeper into the woods. I can hear the beast behind us, getting closer with each passing second. My heart is racing, my lungs burning for air. I don't know what's chasing us, but I know we have to keep running.
We run for hours through dense forests and across open fields. The sun begins to set, casting an eerie glow over the landscape. I try to keep my bearings, but I'm disoriented and terrified. Remy trips over a fallen log and lands hard on the ground, wincing in pain.
"Keep going," he gasps, struggling to get back up. "We have to keep going."
I don't want to leave him to limp, but I know we can't stay here. I nod, taking a deep breath to steady my racing heart and force myself to keep running. Behind me, I can hear Remy pushing himself up, his footsteps scrambling over the leaves and dirt.
We continue through the forest, the shadows growing longer and darker around us. The trees seem to close in, forming a dense, impenetrable wall that traps us within. I try to remember the way back to the car, but I'm so disoriented now that I'm not sure I could find it even if I tried.
I stop hearing the Monster behind us, so I stop to catch my breath. Remy runs up behind me, limping. He falls onto a rock, sitting down as he struggles through wheezing breath. He pulls out his inhaler, takes three big puffs, and holds it in. He struggles until he finally releases and coughs. I look at him, and he glares back at me. He's scared.
"I don't know where we are," I whisper. "I don't know where to go."
"We have to keep moving," Remy says, still slightly wheezing from his asthma attack. He pulls himself up onto his feet and offers me a hand, but I look away, still needing to catch my breath.
"I don't know where to go," I whisper, my voice barely audible over the sound of my racing heart.
Remy hesitates for a moment, his brow furrowed in thought. "Listen," he says, his voice quiet but steady. "If we stay here, we're dead. We have to keep moving."
He takes my hand and pulls me to my feet. I can feel the warmth of his skin, and it somehow grounds me. We walk again through the dense underbrush, our footsteps muffled by leaves and dirt. The darkness around us is almost complete now, but I can still see Remy's figure as I check on him behind me.
"Do you even know where we are going?" I ask
Remy stays silent as he continues to limp behind me. I focus on the sounds around us, hoping to find some clue as to where we are or where we should go. The forest presses in on us from all sides, blocking any possible escape. My heart is still racing, my breath coming in short, ragged gasps.
"Okay, we have to stop." I hear Remy say behind me. I look back and see that he's already sitting on the ground, carefully taking the shoe off the hurt foot.
He winces in pain as he struggles to get the hiking boot off. When he finally gets it off, he peels the sock off to expose his swollen ankle.
"Ah fuck!" Remy says in pain as he realizes his injury is worse than he thought.
I walk over to him as he rests his head back onto a rock in defeat, "I can't keep going."
I sit beside him, hopefully comforting him, but he looks offended.
"You can't stay with me, Landon. At least one of us has to get out of here." Remy says between breaths.
I ignore him and rest my head on the rock next to his. Before I knew it, he was snoring. I knew the pain wouldn't let him sleep for long, but he needed it. I also drifted off eventually.
September 27th, 2008
I was awoken by Remy's winces as he tried to sleep. I looked at my watch, and it was 3am. I knew we were both exhausted, but I couldn't help but feel restless. I decided to stand up and stretch, wincing as my sore muscles protested. I looked around, trying to find some sign of civilization, but the forest seemed to stretch endlessly in all directions.
I nudged him gently. "Hey, let's keep going," I said softly. He opened his eyes blearily and looked at me. He looked around for a second in confusion and then remembered the day prior as he let out a long sigh.
I put his arm around my shoulder and lifted him so we could keep walking. The pain in his foot was unbearable, but I knew we couldn't stop. After what felt like hours, we stumbled across a dirt road. It was faint in the moonlight, but we could make out the tracks from a car or truck.
I slowly let Remy down to sit as I decided to follow the road to try and find help. It was still pitch black all around me, but the moon lit the road.
After assuring Remy that I would be back, I went on my way. The dirt road wound through the dense forest, the trees pressing in on either side like they were trying to keep the light away from me. I tried to focus on putting one foot in front of the other, but my mind kept drifting back to Remy, wondering if he would be okay.
I was so lost in thought for what must've been hours as the sun started rising. I didn't notice the sound of something big following me from the forest edge. My mind must've been racing so much that I didn't notice. I couldn't hear the giant footsteps when I stopped. Only when I started walking again did the Monster continue to follow from the tree line.
I turned toward it, my mind tired and exhausted as I screamed, "What the fuck do you want?! Come get me; I'm right here!" I was too tired, both physically and mentally, to fight or run anymore as I accepted the same fate as Will.
I heard it move some more, and I closed my eyes and braced myself for what was coming. I heard something quickly leave the tree line and land before my feet. I waited, but nothing happened, so I slowly opened my eyes and looked down at my feet.
I saw another human body, limbs, head, and torso torn apart. I could see Remy's shirt torn within what I can only describe as 'Meat.'
I screamed as I realized this was Remy's remains. I fell back onto my butt and frantically scooted myself backward, away from the Monster that I knew hid behind the brush in front of me.
The creature slowly stands from a squat, fully revealing itself. It must have been over seven feet tall, jet black, leather skin and fur. Its face was like a wolf, but its teeth went on forever like a great white shark. It stood there, breathing heavily, staring me down. I didn't know what to do. I sat there forever, thinking about the pain I was about to be in. I thought about Will's screams as he was yanked into the forest.
Suddenly, a loud bang from a rifle fills my ears from behind me. I close my eyes, and my ears start to ring. I've never felt more disoriented in my life. Moments seemed to slow down as I opened my eyes and saw the Monster gripping its shoulder as it roared in my direction and ran further into the forest, away from the edge.
Time is still moving slowly. I look back and see an older man with a short military-grade buzz. It was white with age, and his full but kempt beard still had sprinkles of pepper.
Suddenly, time returned to normal as I observed my surroundings. I saw the pile of meat that Remy once inhabited, and I quickly made my way to my feet, backing away from the man with the rifle.
He cocks his head, looking at me curiously as I approach him cautiously. "Are you... okay?" he asks, lowering the rifle slowly to his side.
I stare at him in disbelief, unable to make myself say anything. He looks at me with understanding eyes and then gestures for me to follow him. I do as he says, walking slowly behind him as he starts back down the dirt road.
I look behind me at Remy's pile and stop, "I can't leave him here like this." I say, "We have to at least bury him."
The man lets out a sigh of annoyance but comes around after a few seconds and helps me bury Remy off to the side of the road.
I stand in silence in front of the pile of dirt as the man waits impatiently a few feet away. I start to think of all the memories all three of us had. I wished I could return to get Will, or at least whatever remained of him, and give him a semi-proper burial like Remy.
"We'd all met in fourth grade," I say out loud to the man waiting for me.
He looks back at me in surprise.
"We had Ms. Birtch. She was so mean, we called her Ms. Bitch." I chuckle to myself.
"Look, we gotta get out of here now. I know you just lost your friend, but we can come back later to reminisce." The man says as he looks at me, annoyed.
I look up and realize he's right. I kneel and place my hand on the dirty pile before getting up and following the man further down the dirt road.
We walked for about 30 minutes, and the sun glared in our eyes as it rose. The old man's name was Steve, and he seemed to be a former soldier, but he didn't talk about it much. He had a way of making me feel safe and protected. He led me to a small cabin nestled in the trees off the dirt road. The cabin was quaint and well-maintained, with a small garden out front and a few chickens scratching around in the dirt.
"This is my home," he said as he opened the door and gestured for me to enter. "Please, make yourself comfortable."
I enter the home and immediately ask, "Do you have a phone? Mine doesn't have service out here."
He shakes his head, but I follow him as he enters the kitchen. He opens the old white fridge door and pulls out a milk carton. He places it on the dining table and fetes a glass from above the sink. He grabs another one and gestures it toward me. I look down at the milk and shake my head no. He only grabs one glass and sits at the table as he pours himself a glass of milk. He takes a long gulp and places the glass back down. He gestures for me to sit, so I do.
"I don't have a phone here," he says, "but I know where we can get to a radio to get you out of here." The man says as he takes another sip of the milk.
I look at him, confused. "What do you mean get me out of here?" I ask, still sitting down at the table.
He looks past me, so I turn around and see a picture on the wall. It's the man but much younger. He was surrounded by three children and a woman. It must be his family.
"Does your family live here too?" I ask
He stops, moves his gaze back to me, sits back in his chair, and sighs.
"They used to." He says in his grizzly voice.
I waited for him to expand, but he never did.
"Did that... monster... get them?" I ask hesitantly, not wanting to offend the man who saved my life.
He gets up from the chair and goes to the window above the sink. He stares for a long time before speaking. "I guess technically they're still here."
I get up and stand next to him, looking into his backyard. It seems overgrown, as if it has not been tended to in years. The grass was growing between brick paths, and bushes reached across the path like thick underbrush. Everything was unkempt except for one square. In that square, there were four headstones. The man's family.
"Yes," the man says as I look at him, "that monster got them."
I helped the man do chores for the rest of the day until the sun went below the mountains.
The rest of the night was spent planning how to get to the radio tomorrow morning. He said it was in an old radio tower up in the mountains.
The man told me I'd need to rest for tomorrow, but as I slept in the cot in the living room, I couldn't stop dreaming about the Monster and what it did to Will and Remy or what it would do to me.
September 28th 2008
As expected, I didn't get much sleep, but when the man shook me awake, it was still dark out. He told me to dress warm, as the radio tower was a ways up the mountain and the air would be cold. I dressed quickly in the clothes he had laid for me, and we set off into the darkness. The stars were visible, twinkling above us as we hiked through the woods. The man led the way, moving silently through the darkness, his hand resting on a walking stick.
The man was more talkative today as if he hadn't had anyone to talk to in years. I learned his name is Gary, and he and his family lived in Boston. They decided to take a no-technology vacation out here four years ago. They rented the cabin he brought me to, which Gary now owns. He came from money, so that was never the problem.
When I asked why he lived out here, he paused briefly before saying, "I can't leave my family." That was the last thing he said before we reached the tower.
It took about an hour and a half to make it to the tower. It was overgrown, and Gary told me it had been years since he'd last climbed it. When we reached the top, the first rays of sunlight began to peak over the horizon. The radio tower was ancient and rusty, and the steps leading up to it were rickety at best.
"So, what's the plan?" I asked as I carefully made my way up the steps.
The man stayed silent and kept climbing the winding stairs. Something seemed off like the man had changed.
Gary looked down at the tree line below us. I looked too and only caught a blur as the creature ran off and the bushes swayed in its place. Gary grins and looks at me, "Go down."
Surprised, I stare at him, confused. He grabs me by the shirt and pulls me closer, "Go. Down." His hot, stinky breath envelops my face. He pushes me back, forcing me to grab the railing to keep myself from falling. When he sees that he failed in pushing me, he snarls and continues climbing the stairs faster, skipping a step.
I hear the Monster's roar right below us as I see it climbing up through the metal grate. I freeze, not knowing what to do. Then I hear Gary's voice over a PA system. It rings loud into my ears before he talks, "Kid, I said get the fuck down. You don't need to be another victim of this thing!"
Still frozen, even more confused by his words, I look down again and see the Monster climbing the metal poles that held the structure up. I watched the creature scale the radio tower with an eerie, almost unnatural agility. Each movement was swift and precise, powerful claws gripping the metal rungs effortlessly. The tower seemed to shudder under its weight, a low creaking sound accompanying each ascent. I could see its eyes glowing with a feral intensity, focused on something far above. The sight was both mesmerizing and terrifying, a primal fear gripping me as I watched this Monster get closer and closer to me.
Finally, I snap out of it when Gary's voice fills the sky again, "Let's fucking go, you mangey half-breed!"
The creature seemed to move faster at his voice like it knew him personally. As it finally made it to me, it leaped toward me on the stairs, but I could move to the side and almost dodge it completely. It jumped so far that it nearly flew off the side of the tower. As it reached for the railing to save itself from falling, it snatched onto my elbow, slicing it so bad I could see the bone.
Grabbing onto my wound, trying to keep my skin from peeling completely off, I started running back down the stairs. The Monster looks down at me, and I can tell it's about to pounce on me, but Gary's voice distracts it again, "You don't want that little shit, you mutt! Come get some seasoned meat!" The Monster starts climbing toward Gary again.
Gary starts laughing. A laugh only a person who has given up on everything could. It slowly turned to sobbing as I heard his last words, "I love you, Mary, Lilly, and little Amber. Margaret, I'm sorry, but I can't live without you-" Just then, the Monster made it to the top, where Gary was in a little structure attached to the tower.
Everything was silent. I started sprinting down the stairs, almost to the bottom, when my hearing went and I only heard a ringing. Again, things moved in slow motion as I looked up and saw an enormous explosion coming from the structure Gary was in. The ground started to rumble as things went back to average speed, and I tried to make it down in time before the whole rickety structure collapsed.
It must've been adrenalin that got me out in time. The tower began to crumble and toppled in the opposite direction of me.
I stood there, waiting for the Monster to emerge, but it never did. I sat down, still holding my wound as it seeped warm blood all over me. I sat there, knowing help was not coming, accepting my imminent death for what felt like hours.
I must've passed out because the next thing I remember was having water thrown onto my face as I lay on the ground. A man and a woman were tending to my elbow wound and, in my delirium, snatched my arm away and began running from the rescue team. I ran for what felt like hours before passing out. I later learned that I ran only about 50 feet before passing out. Now I'm in the hospital tending to my elbow.
How will I ever live with this? How could I go on?
September 25th, 2023
I only remember a little after that. I remember telling authorities about the Monster and how it mauled Will and Remy. I also told them about Gary, and they were able to find all three bodies, well, what was left of them. They never saw any sign of the Monster, though.
After telling them the unbelievable story, I have to admit, I would have a hard time believing I was a suspect in all their murders. After years of trying, they could never find any evidence against me.
After many attempts to end my life, I decided I wouldn't let that Monster win; even after it was out of my life, I refused to let it be the reason I go.

After playing "Fallout 3" 10 years later I finally visited the famous Vault 108 aka The Gary Vault. While the creepy and surreal atmosphere was great I felt that it was very underutilized. I think that you could make a great quest-line that can feel like a psychological horror with this setup. I made up some characters and stuff but I think that it's a much better story then what we have:
"After a whole week of walking through the wasteland with a small caravan you finally get to Canterbury Commons. You go to Uncle Roe and ask him if there is anything to do around here. He tells you that a hunter called “Dusty” is missing and if he won’t come back, they will have to hire a new guy because the food reserves are getting scarce. You can go around town and ask what they know about him. Everybody tells you that he is a cool guy, likes to smoke a red pipe and has a cowboy hat on him all the time. First it’s nothing out of the ordinary. One of the commoners is a drunk woman in her mid 40s. When you ask her she reveals that Dusty is her boyfriend. She yells “F***ing a**hole, I knew he’d run away from me! F*** him, I hate his guts”. So yeah, here’s the answer – probably didn’t want to deal with his alcoholic girlfriend so he ran away to whatever other town there is… But if you have a high enough Speech Skill you can tell her to “Stop being a b*tch about this because a man is missing, a man that despite her addictions loved her”. She then stops in her tracks and tells you that “Well, maybe I went a bit overboard, listen… we had some ups and downs but he was a good man overall. I didn’t like his new pal, called Freddy. Hell, at least he made some money while selling him hallucinogenic mushrooms.”. You ask “what mushrooms?” and she tells you that on his hunting trips he knew a place where to find them, and Freddy – the local junkie just bought everything from him. So you ask around even more and find out who actually is this Freddy guy. Uncle Roe tells you that he was usually seen lying around somewhere high as a kite, and that he is not around right now but that’s normal – probably sleeping in a ditch or whatever. You ask him about the mushrooms and he tells you that Dusty once told him as a secret that he picks his mushrooms south of here in a small forest. There is a little radioactive puddle and the mushrooms grow around it a lot. After asking if Freddy knew about it, Uncle Roe tells you that… “Yeah, I told him, he bribed me so what was I supposed to do? 50 caps is a fortune for such small info. Also you better go at night because the mushrooms glow yellowish-green, and it’s better to see them that way.”.
You go to the small forest to the south of Canterbury Commons. You see the puddle and that someone just picked all the mushrooms there and left only the stalks. You don’t know why but you feel like you are being watched by someone. You hear some commotion behind the trees and a shadowy figure running away. You go to where you heard the noise and find some footsteps. They are leading you through the dark woods to a nearby rock formation. You see a familiar entrance made of wooden worn out doors. You go inside there and see a giant cave with heaps of trash lying all around. The smell is so putrid it feels like being inside a hot portable toilet. At the end of the cave you see metallic vault doors with a number “108”. When you open them, the smell gets even worse, you barely see anything because your eyes start to tear up. You walk a few steps through a metal corridor and see a glass window to the security booth. You use your sleeve to wipe the dirty window and look through it, searching for anything of use. To your utter astonishment you see a man there. He just stands there looking at a wall, like he was hypnotized. In a fracture of a second he turns his head around and starts walking towards you. You take a look at him. He’s a medium height guy, with a pale skin, dressed in the vault 108 uniform – no characteristic features. The guy looks you right in the eye with a dead stare, not moving, just looking. After ten very uncomfortable seconds the guy asks “Gary?” and runs away. What the hell? You didn’t know anyone called Gary, but maybe the guy got some hallucinations from the mushrooms or whatever. Maybe that was Freddie, he probably got a bad trip, thought that you were a Super Mutant and ran away to this place. You walk further the metal corridor and with every step the smell gets worse. Now it smells like a rotten egg drenched in urine. You enter a small room filled with crates and some bones. Feels typical for a vault, probably the remains of a random dweller. But when you look closely at the bones, they seem fresh. They maybe have closer to a week, not 20 years. You look to the right and behind a crate under another pile of bones you see a corpse. Wait a second… It’s the same guy from the window. He’s the same medium height guy, with pale skin wearing a vault 108 uniform but… dead? Maybe it’s his twin brother? But the resemblance! He really looks identical. Also he is not dead for a long time, the smell is not coming from him, it’s coming from further down the room, through another metal door. You go there and with every step you start hearing chewing noises. Rats? Dogs? Molerats? Better get my trusty 10mm pistol. When getting to another room, you see a guy kneeling in front a corpse. After a split second look at the dead guy, you see a cowboy hat, that’s probably the hunter Dusty, but what the hell is going on here? The kneeling guy gets startled and turns his head around like a rabid dog. His mouth and clothes covered in blood with a piece of flesh still hanging from his mouth. It’s the same guy from the window! He shouts at you “GARY!” and starts running like a maniac with a sharp kitchen knife in his hand. You swiftly point your gun at his head and shoot 3 times. Miss, Miss, Hit. The guy fell on the ground like a bag of bricks and mumbled “Gary…” with his dying breath. You stand there, looking at the gruesome scene speechless. A half eaten cowboy, a dead cannibal and you.
What in the f*ck was going on here?..."

My MIL has taken a HUGE dip in the last 5 years. She has fibromyalgia and different mental illnesses including hoarding unfortunately. Like rooms completely filled, only a small path to walk through in the house, unclean kitchen and bathroom. It’s incredibly sad but she refuses help. Some days she thinks she has an issue, other days she is furious with us because how dare we think she has a problem.
She is a new experimental ketamine treatment and she had to sign a paper that she wouldn’t drink yet she’s been drinking (she’s an alcoholic but would never admit it). She abuses her medications and just asks her doctor for random pain meds, hoards them and then takes them later on when she wants. She lives on her own other than her “boyfriend” who doesn’t have any other friends and enables her behaviours. It’s soooo toxic.
Well here we are, she now (for a while) has not been capable of watching our 3 young children alone but she’s so offended by it and upset with us. It makes it extra difficult because we can’t even explain to her that she’s going down hill mentally because she’d freak out. We don’t know if she’s just going down hill as she’s getting older (she’s only in her late 50s) or if it is from mixing all these pain meds and alcohol all the time and the hoarding mental illness added to it all.
Anyways I’m just basically here to encourage you that if you have to make those tough boundaries it’s OKAY! You’re the villain! You have to look out for the well being and safety of your children and yourself. So if you are also having similar issues I’m cheering for you!

Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road
With all the Leaper activity outside there was nothing else to do but sit and think. So Rene did just that. But the more he thought, the worse things seemed to get.
The Fleet had no idea what they were walking into. There were entire nations of these humanoid monsters out here, and all of them made the Amits look like cuddly pets in comparison. He had to warn them. No one else could. His entire platoon and all of Mound 13’s scientists were gone. He alone could forestall disaster and avert the coming slaughter.
If only he could make the long trek home. But that would mean days if not weeks of moving through enemy-infested territory. Untold thousands of Leapers stood between him and the edge of the world as the Fleet understood it.
Even if he did warn the Fleet in time, there was no guarantee that they could withstand the world-altering forces he had encountered out here. If the Vitalus was a real being, a demon from the ancient world, then there was one thing which could rival its power.
The Divine Engine.
But that old heap was now rusting under the suns all the way back at Mound Euler. Besides, something inside it had given out, a malfunction maybe. Rene wasn’t a qualified Antiquarian, so he couldn’t even begin to guess how to get the thing working again.
If I’d had an ounce of sense in me back then, I would’ve walked that hulk back to the Fleet where brighter minds than mind could get more use out of it, Rene thought bitterly. He had thrown away the most significant scientific and historical find in living history on a pointless gesture of vengeance. Granted, he’d wiped out an entire omega-class mound singlehandedly, but if the eggheads back home had been able to piece the damned thing together…
Anyway, it was no use crying over spilt jelly now. His mind switched to his more immediate problems. He had less than three days before he ran out of fungicidal doses. His wounds were shallow but numerous. Once they became infested with parasitic molds, inflammation and fever would soon follow, ending with the condition they called the ‘baker’s shakes’, a rapid deterioration of motor functions in the afflicted areas.
Despair and his wavering sense of duty roiled within him. Any one of the aforementioned factors would have made his mission untenable. Put them all together like this, and it all seemed nigh impossible.
But the biggest problem of them all was squatting a few inches away from Rene, her yellowish eyes shining in the gloom.
You’ve done all that you can for her, above and beyond what is required of an officer of the Fleet, Rene told himself. Enemy combatants—human combatants—are supposed to be afforded the same level of care that a soldier could expect for himself. The issue was that he could barely fend for himself out here, much less babysit a prisoner who would like nothing better than to stick him when his back was turned.
She was a liability that he couldn’t afford. He would be doing himself and the Fleet a favor by ridding himself of that liability. Zildiz noticed him looking at her and thrust out her chin impudently. Rene felt a flash of irritation, his mind seizing on it like a drowning man clutching at anything to stay afloat.
The irritation grew into a bright, senseless rage. All at once he became convinced that she was the cause and culprit of all his suffering. Without her slowing him down at every turn, he would at least stand a chance of at making it back home, though with the onset of infections the trip would certainly cost him his life.
You first, Rene thought, eying Zildiz hatefully. He clenched his fists, fingernails digging white furrows into his palms. Zildiz shifted in her seat, the change in her body language slight but unmistakable. With a pang of guilt Rene realized that she knew exactly what he was thinking.
You’ve already killed once in the name of the greater good, Rene thought, and Lethway died for nothing that day. Can you honestly bear to make that choice again?
Rene cleared his throat and began noisily sorting through his gear, turning out the contents of his survival kit and cataloguing them again.
Zildiz did not relax in the slightest, watching closely as he took out the artefacts which he hadn’t been able to identify and examining them one by one.
He first looked over the obsidian slate. Rene turned it over in his hands and felt the smooth surface, pressing it firmly with his knuckles and rapping it. He found two curious holes in its side and stuck his pinky finger in them, felt cold nubs of metal inside. Nothing happened, so he put the slate down and started fiddling with the bowl that had a dirty great spike sticking out the center of it. He extended the tripod at its base and set it up, then waiting.
Again, nothing happened. Rene began to feel like seven kinds of idiot until he discovered a pair of rubbery cords dangling form the base of the tripod. They had three metal prongs sticking out of their ends. In a flash of inspiration Rene recalled the strange holes he had found in the slate. Carefully he fitted the pronged cords into the openings. There was a smooth click as the prongs found purchase and locked in, the cords matching the holes perfectly in diameter and shape. Rene stood back and looked on with bated breath, sure that he had just made a discovery of historic proportions.
Even Zildiz started taking an interest in his doings. After a moment, she said:
“You have no idea what these tools are for, do you?”
“Don’t be absurd,” Rene said haughtily, “This process just takes a while. You have to find the right harmonies,” he added in his most mysterious tone.
“Right harmonies for what, exactly?” she asked next, sounding skeptical.
At a loss for words, Rene folded his arms and grumpily retreated to his corner of the lair. But as he withdrew, Rene quite unintentionally allowed a beam of soft light from his spyhole to enter the darkened space, whereupon it happened to shine on the obsidian slate he’d laid on the floor. Suddenly the spiked bowl began to rotate on its tripod, compelled by some unseen force.
“For that!” Rene said happily. For once Zildiz had no biting remarks to add. They watched the bowl spin on its axis until Rene got bored and tried another experiment. He covered the spyhole with the palm of his hand. The rotations of the bowl immediately slowed and came to a stop. Rene then removed his hand, and after a moment it started to spin again. In addition, an inscription winked into existence on the upper left corner of the slate. Rene leaned in and read the following:
“EXOCOM network unavailable. Please try again later.”
Rene rubbed his chin and pondered the incomprehensible message. What on earth was a network? It sounded like some kind of fishing implement.
Zildiz on the other hand said nothing, but noted the clueless look on her captor’s face. She understood the message all too well. The tool was trying to contact someone or something out there. Like her, the device was was having problems raising a signal on the relevant frequencies. She reached for her magnetosynaptic organ and searched through her audible spectrum, going over it with a fine-toothed comb until she found the source of the only radio activity she could sense: the spinning bowl itself. She listened in and realized that it was transmitting a repeating message in some garbled parscode so dense with information she didn’t dare begin unravelling it.
She did, however, commit its frequency to her memory. It would come in handy if ever the Vitalus wished to track down the intended recipients of the message.
Meanwhile, Rene had thought of a new experiment. He picked up the hollow sphere and saw to his delight that it also had the same pair of holes at its bottom, identical to the ones on the spinning bowl. He transferred the cords and connected the slate to the sphere.
The device took a long time in responding, but Rene’s earlier success was fresh on his mind and he would not be discouraged. He even scraped away the sides of the spyhole until it was wide enough to put his arm through.
“More light means more power,” he hypothesized aloud. He also had another theory about the shapes of the artefacts themselves. A sphere, a bowl and a rectangle, all of them perfect geometric shapes. Coincidence? He thought not! There was a secret harmony of mathematics woven into all this sorcery, he could just feel it.
Rene’s faith was rewarded a few minutes later when the sphere started showing rings of soft blue fluorescence. But his amazement reached orgasmic proportions when the sphere sprouted a set of spiky legs and began to roll itself around the floor of the burrow, still attached to the slate.
“Initiating vitals scan. Please remain still,” it warbled in a young boy’s voice. Zildiz backed away from it as far as she could manage in the tight confines, treating it as if it were a poisonous viper. The blue circles began to emit strobing flashes of light that dazzled Rene’s eyes. It was rather like those chemical picture boxes where you had to sit stone-still for hours before the image could develop properly.
“Scan complete. Hullo there!” the sphere happily giggled, “How can I help?”
“Oh, wise spirit of the sphere,” Rene solemnly intoned, still intending to impress Zildiz with superiority of the Fleet’s ways, “Hear our prayers.”
“Aw, shucks,” said the sphere. It spoke with a whimsical twang that was like no accent Rene had ever heard, “You charmer, you! You can just call me E.X.A.R., since we’re friends. Or just plain Ex if you’re into that whole brevity thing.”
“Exar?” Rene repeated.
“Sure! Stands for Extravehicular Advisory Robot. My sole purpose is to keep you happy and healthy. Give us the sitrep, chief.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“The lowdown, tailo. The long and the short of it.”
Rene looked to Zildiz for help but saw that she was too busy pressing herself against the sides of the burro and squirming like mad. It was the first time he’d ever seen her show fear, and he didn’t know what to make of it.
“Well see, your crash suit indicates that you’ve suffered some minor lacerations and contusions. Nothing major—though your brain wave patterns suggest that you ain’t been getting much sleep. Everything alright?”
“Erm. To be perfectly honest with you, Mr. Exar, no. Everything is not alright.”
The sphere uttered a sympathetic whistle and went the color of cream pastel.
“I’m so sorry to hear that. What seems to be the problem?”
Zildiz moaned:
“It is a simulacrum! A silicate soul of the Betrayers!”
“Tranquilo, mes amigos,” Exar urged, “Let’s simmer down a spell and figure this out.”
He rolled about to face her and once more emitted the flashing pulses, Zildiz covering her face with her hands and letting out a frightened shriek.
“Okeydokey,” Exar said briskly, “We need to get this lady over to a trauma center pronto. And I mean ASAP! We’re gonna need to fly her to a team of specialists who can surgically remove that parasite that’s latched onto her.”
“You know someone who can do that?” Rene said in disbelief.
“Of course! Exodus Industries has hardened bases all over this solar system, fully equipped and staffed. We’ll have your lady friend up and running in no time.”
“And you can take us to one of those bases?”
“You kidding? We’ll be cruising first class in an interplanetary shuttle in two shakes of a dog’s whiskers! Heck, I’m already hailing our ride.”
Rene hopes flared into life. The gods were real, in a moment the spirit of the sphere would summon them forth!
Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road

(Year 2030..... Sweeps Week..... Pat Sajak comes out of retirement to host)
Welcome to our special week-long series featuring 3 incarcerated family members competing against one another. To kickoff the week, Donna, Charlie, and Wendi - 3 game-show loving members of the murderous Adelson clan - vie for a one-day pass to visit the family patriarch Harvey at Shady Pines Retirement Home. Here are the rules: a partially completed word will be shown. Contestants must ring in to answer. All answers are related to the family or murder in some way. The contestant who guesses the most words correctly before the horn sounds is the winner. Let's get started!
P....The first word is ????FFE
P.....Charlie go
C....I got this, it’s ETOUFFE, the type of seafood paella I ordered for Dad's 70th party
P.....Wrong, everyone knows there was no paella and no party
C.....No Pat, you've got it all wrong
P.....Oh shut up Charlie, yes Donna, your guess?
D.....LUFTWAFFE, the insignia on the Nazi uniform I wanted Wendi to dress the kids in
P.....Wrong, too many letters and I might add you are a sick evil witch
D.....Well, I've never been so insulted, no banana bread for you Pat
P......Stick that fake banana bread right where you pulled it from
P.....Wendi, care to give it a shot?
W....doe-eyed Is it what I longed to be as a child...head tilt... a GIRAFFE?
P.....Why Wendi, this is so sweet - and correct!
P.....Wendi takes the early lead
P.....It's now time to find out what our 3 contestants have been up to in prison, Charlie you first
C.....Pat, I'm happy to announce that June and I are the proud parents of a baby boy named Greco
P.....Not sure what the world needs is another Charlie Adelson spawn. Donna how about you?
D.....Pat I'm enjoying my duties as the common room TV coordinator wink-wink
P.....Do your duties include keeping prisoners from throwing the remote at the TV? wink-wink
P.....Wendi, how about you?
W....Pat I've just completed my 2nd novel
P.....Wonderful, what's it about?
W....The main character Xanaxia makes Matty Walker in Body Heat look like a nun
W....She manipulates her mom & bro into killing her ex, throws bro under bus, frames virtuous boyfriend
W....Final scene: scott-free and wealthy Xanaxia basking in the Miami sun with her Sunshines
P......Wow Wendi, sounds like a real page turner. I'm sure it will be as successful as your first novel.
P......OK let's resume play. The next word is T?T?
P.....Yes Donna
D.....I know, I know - that's my old friend TATO from the Bump
P.....Good guess Donna but incorrect
P.....Charlie you have the board
C.....It's my old friend TUTO, the hot head who almost ran me over in his cheap pick-up at Yardbird
D....So horrible son, didn't even have the decency to hot wire your Ferrari in parking lot and use that
P.....OK enough of this, Wendi do you want to take a shot?
W....sobbing Is it TITS, Katie's augmentation paid for by my brother more sobbing
P.....Wendi that's correct. May I ask why the tears?
W....more bawling the beach photo, that effing beach photo
P.....Yes go on
W....Katie & I next to each other in bikinis, our bodies pressed right up against each another wailing
P..... Wendi, are you able to continue?
W.... ear-piercing wail my matzahs next to her new voluptuous jugs
P.....Wendi, you poor dear. Charlie gets you a cheap new TV set while Katie gets a new TaTa set
W....I know right? It's just not fair.
P.....But Wendi your gorgeous blue eyes beam in that same photo while Katie's got sunglasses on
W....stops sobbing on a dime This is so sweet, Pat you can do shots of Bulleit Bourbon with me any time
P.....I'd love to Wendi so long as you promise not to vomit on me
W....wendi laughing No worry Pat, that regurgitation was staged by me to implicate Charlie
P.....pat laughing Wendi you succubus you
W.....wendi laughing Oh Pat I love it when you talk dirty to me
P.....Kind of kinky Wendi, eh? Is it true you're into teacher-student porn?
W....Nah, not anymore, prison warden-inmate is my thing
P......Internet or personal experience?
****** LOUD HORN SOUNDS*********
P.....Oh no, just when things were heating up
P.....Congratulations Wendi you're our winner!
P......And now you're both a Weakest Link and Wheel of Fortune champion. How do you feel?
W....Like I've lived up to the Most Likely To Succeed honor bestowed on me in high school
P.....Indeed you have Wen Charlie interrupts
C....This is ridiculous. It's all rigged. Pat’s under her spell. Wendi always gets her way.
D.....beaming with maternal pride That's my girl, always able to perform when needed
P.....That's it for today
P.....Let's end our first family show by remembering the movie The Godfather and Rob Adelson
P.....Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and your family far away
P.....Tune in tomorrow when Manson family members Squeaky, Tex, and AI hologram of Charlie square off

So last year I moved out of my dad's house and moved in with my boyfriend after I couldnt handle how my dad was making me into the keeper of the house, but was highly unfair about thing some examples, making me always cook something for him when cooking, but him never making something for me if he cooks. I was shouted at for not cleaning up after myself if I left even a knife out but he could leave him plate, cutlary and glass and the table and it was fine. I was screamed at for having a cupboards and draws or something else open while needing something inside them, but I would alway walking on him leaving them open. I had to turn off all the lights at night after he went to bed and then go and make sure the blanket was over him correctly. He always says that his faro it child is his dog Toffee, and he which as time has past he sounds more and more true than just as a joke.
This started happening after my mother left us when I was 14 and J was 17. Things started to get worse after my older sister( lest call them J) moved out at the beginning of last year, but it was my job to take care of more things as they had harder jobs.
Shortly after J moved out, my father made my hand in a cv for one of his friend (we will call her W) at the hotel I work at and told me that they were staying untill they can find a better place. She never moved out and my dad never told me that she was now living with us, after 3 month of her being there did I ask him when I she finding a new place to live did he tell me that she was staying, I asked him as to why he never asked me for my opinion on the matter or even tell me he said that is is his house and my opinion means nothing and that it is his house and he can do what ever he wants to. I know this but I live there my whole life and thought that I should have at lest been told.
I will be honest I don't like her at all. W would keep poking her nose into my business and acting like we were friends or try to pereant me. She lies alot. My dad treated her better then he treated me and would shout at me if I ever asked her kindly to remember things like to close cupboard or the draws, to clean up or even turn off the gas stove. W would also cook things that I couldn't eat, I suffer from IBS and couldn't eat spicy things, she knows this and still makes the same dish everytime she cooked and I would be told by my dad to eat it as W woulf feel aahamed and hurt if I didnt, knowing I would be stuck on the toilet for 5 hour after eating it. I was told that at time to find my own way home because my dad had just drop her off and was at home now and was busy. She tell him everything I do at work. She isn't paying, bills or for groceries. W would take and use my things with out asking and if I got something new she would stay good we have that we were running out. She copied who I dressed for work, and I the same shoes I use, I wearing a skeart and butter up not a dress(I'm the only one that dresses that way everyone else wears dresses) I had a new coat she got a new coat, but I she also want to know we're I got my skeart from as it looks so nice. She would eat snack that I boutht for myself with my own money. For my birthday last year I told my dad I want a family dinner with him, J and my gran his mother he said ok and then brought W with us. She can interrupt me when I and speaking but how dare I terrupt her when she speaks. My father used to visit me at work but slowly stopped visiting my and started only coming over to my work on days that I am not work but W is. My dad would always makes comments when I got sick and how I must just go to work, and I but then tell her to lie so that she can watch the rugby with him. At work she has been telling people thta she is sleeping with my dad and if this it true then that's fine my dad is a grow abult and at lest he has found someone after my mother, and I but choosing her over your own child is something I can't forgive my father for. There are more things but I would here for ever lissing them out.
Before moving out I visited my dad's work alot, because my boyfriend worked near him, and kept doing this after moving out, as I thought I could spend quality time with my dad with out W there to interfere and stop my dad from talking and spending time with me. Only to be faced with his colleagues one day saying I need to talk with me dad more, because he is so amazing for how he took care of me and J after our mother left us and so I need to do better. I took out my phone and showed them how over the last two months that I hadn't been living with him he had only messaged my on his own 3 times and out of those 3, he 1 was about me and the other where and W and her sister that had moved in. They went quite before I told them that he was lieing to them and my dad looked angry but said nothing. I honestly don't know where that confadance came from. He started messaging me on his own move after that, but I believe that was for he image and not to see how I was truly doing. My dad loves him image about everything it always has to be good and know no can know what is actually happening.
My dad has meet my boyfriend ( let's call him N) before but will never talk about N or ask how he is doing when I used to visit and I can't talk about him when over, but I but J can talk about her boyfriend. My mother, both my gandmothers, and grandfather and other who hasn't meet N always asks about N and how he is doing, even my sister asks about him sometime and has meet him. I do believe this is because I have resently found out that my dad is racist and as I have known hates anyone that isn't Christian, N is Indian as well as Hindu. I don't follow any religion. I believe in a higher powes, but don't believe any religion is right or wrong on who that my be, I just refuse to believe in any religion that prospers hate. My father mother has spoken to N on the phone before and has told me that though she would prefer I date a white, Christian man, but she can look past that as she can see how much we love each other and how much he takes care of me and she is so happy to see me happy.
More resently J is going over to my father's house more often and I have never been invited to spend time with them, but will always get a message for J after they spend time together saying that she missed me, and how they wished I could spend time with them next time. Again I am never invited. J and I have been growing apart this I moved out and she has been seeing my dad move, I don't know what they talk about,but has always been a little off when something good happened to me, and even after explaining how I feel living with our father and how I want to move out, I was told by her to stay and just use our father for his money.
Something has recently happened that I feel is the last straw and now what to stop talking to my dad. When I moved out I couldn't take my cat Tom, he is my baby with me as the flat doesn't allow pets. I ask my dad to take care of him for me as I couldn't take him and father said yes to this and everything was fine, but I up untill yesterday night when my dad messaged me on the family group (this has my father, sister and I) saying that he is no longer taking care of the Tom as he keeps going to the neighbors house to play with their cat Storm and they are complaining about this. J said nothing to this even though she has seen the message. There is so much I want to say to them as they both know how much Tom means to me, they saw how I broke down and cried when I thought he was died, most of it I want to say to my father, but I but I just cant.
I don't want to talk to either of them anymore. They have hurt me so many time and I don't know what to do anymore, but I can't take how anymore hurt or disappointment anymore.

Edit: DO NOT message me a simple hi or hello, with no information about you, Put some effort in to your message like i have, come on. Day+Attempt#193
Hello everyone, Thank you for taking the time to read, I know its long, I know - I know. But its worth the read, Trust me. I appreciate you immensely.
Here's a bit about me,
My name is Jay, I live on the East coast of the US. I'm looking for love - like everyone else on here.., but you may not believe or even be doubtful that I've never had a GF before with me being 26, but its true. I'm simply just not willing to "be with" just anyone and I'm very picky. I want us to be a match, more than just have similar things in common.
One thing I have always been told is that I'm a "Real Catch, I'd be extremely lucky to have someone like you" - WELL THEN TAKE ME. I'M FREE. LOL.
About me:
Physically -
~I'm a semi-tall guy, around 5'10.
~I'm thin but muscular.
~I have dirty blonde/ brown hair.
~Changing colored eyes.
~A voice nice enough to melt all your safeguards and get right into your heart and weak spots.
~I do not have any tattoos or piercings. Though I would like to get some eventually.
If you'd like to see a picture of me just ask and I'll show you - IF I may see you as well, I simply just don't want a picture of me out there for anyone to see.
-If there's anything else you'd like to know just ask.
Otherwise -
~I do have 3 pet bunnies I would be more than happy to show you, they are extremely cute.
~I'm a very honest and down to earth guy.
~I'm very patient and easy going.
~I'm very curious and inquisitive. I will try to ask everything I can to learn all about you haha.
~I'm Very VERY Kind & Caring, I will probably ask how you are feeling a bajillion times a day, simply out of care for you.
~I can get pretty clingy, and will always want your attention and to be talking with you. If i have someone im interested in i wont want to talk to anyone else🤷‍♂️
~I'm very trustworthy - you can confide in me, and entrust your deepest secrets and I wont tell a soul.
~I'm a HUGE hopeless romantic, im old fashioned and will always try to impress you.
- I'm, a BIG softie even though I may look a smol bit intimidating, but I'd do just about anything to see you smile or laugh. And yes.., I do mean anything.
~I'm a big goof - I will get up to some silly shenanigans ALL the time, I will crack dumb jokes and send you memes and tik toks just to make you happy, even if its from across the room I'd wait to see your reaction lol.
~I'm extremely loyal, and would never even think of cheating.
~I will cook for you, and clean up too, even around the house, I'm very self productive and don't ask for much. Just don't forget to kiss the cook.
~I'd also love to just cuddle up and watch a movie or read a book together, anything to get us closer. Id try to take you out on dates whenever possible haha. I have a million SUPER romantic date ideas I have but have never had anyone interested enough in me to take out. Here's your chance ;)
~I will always want to share stuff I find interesting with you, and try to share every moment of every day with you. I'm not looking for someone who can only talk for a small amount of time, I want someone who's willing to put in all the effort I put into them back into me, it goes both ways. If I'm "with" someone you are my TOP priority nobody and nothing else would be. You would be the only person I'd truly want to talk to, so rest assured I would NEVER cheat, even more so because no one is interested in me - Hence why I'm here hahaha.
I'm sure there is more to me than this snippet but I cant think of more at the moment haha, so get to know me and find out more about me.
Some of my interests are: Engineering- I'm a nerd. I admit it. I love being technical and hands on, I love building things. All kinds of things, from furniture, machinery, and reverse engineering anything I find. I love learning how things work and trying to improve things.
Music - I prefer music with a very fast pace, or with some very meaningful lyrics I can relate to. I love to sing along to music and songs that have a deep meaning behind it I can sympathize with makes it all the better. Some bands I like are: Bad Omens, Beartooth, Demon Hunter, MIW, I9K - The list goes on. I'm a bit of a metalhead unfortunately.
TV Shows & Movies - I love watching shows, and I'd love to stream some shows and have some E-dates with you, to get to know you, or if you are close to me, maybe we could do it in person. Some shows I like or more of the Fantasy/Sci-Fi, Comedy, Action, stuff like: National Treasure, Halo, BattleBots, Rick and Morty, AHS, Anything Marvel or DC, The Witcher, Wednesday, The Sandman, The Magicians, The Umbrella Academy, ETC.
Gaming - Yes yes I know, Basic guy likes basic stuff. But gaming has been a thing for me since forever. I know most of you wont care or want to hear that, but I'll leave out the specifics on this part unless you are interested in that, MEGA Bonus points if you are.
Here's a lists of Cons to dating me-
~I'm not Ryan Reynolds. Disappointing, I know.
~I will fight you on what goes on pizza lol.
~I'm not rich.., Yet.
~I can't pronounce Worcestershire.
~I'm slightly forgetful, but with good reasoning.
~(Not really a con but- some might disagree) I still have ALL of my firsts, Do with that what you will c:
~I've got an endless pile of love and affection and no one to give it to! What a dilemma! Help me fix it?
Other than that I'll save the rest for a bit more of getting to know each other.
Here's a bit of what I'm looking in you:
~Preferably someone with lots of free time, and loves to chit chat. I'm seriously not interested in getting 1 message a day. Though I understand people get busy, I personally am not willing to try to learn about you and form something with 7 responses a week. Effort gets reciprocated and I appreciate the time you put in me.
~Physically: -I’m not personally attracted to anyone who’s “curvy/ chubby”, I apologize. Not a shallow thing, I just dont have the attraction chemical in my brain for that, I’m sorry. -If you’re shorter than me, thats a plus to me. -I love dimples, if you have those when you smile, bonus points 😊 - I’m not sure what else to put.., but as for nsfw wise find out😂
~I'm a sucker for a different accent other than American, and if you have an Posh English accent you have already won my heart.
~I'm also only really looking for someone within the ages of 18-35. I don't want anyone old enough to be my mom lol.
~I'd prefer (But not a must) people NOT on the other side of the world, as other time zones SUCK. I don't expect to find anyone who also has never had a boyfriend either, but that would be a real plus. I also don't mind a LDR, but I don't want that forever. But it gives us time to get to know each other.
But as for attributes I'm looking for in you:
~Someone who is above all else very very Loyal and would never cheat.
~Someone who is Honest, and will tell me the truth over a little white lie.
~Someone who is Kind & Caring, who'd constantly check on me, and accept me for who I am & help me improve day to day.
~Someone who is trustworthy, and I can count on to keep my secrets safe, or even just help me remember things.., I do tend to be somewhat forgetful.
~Someone who is very Patient and wants to see me succeed and will help me do so, just like I would help you. Even if its small day to day things, I would appreciate your company ANY time.
~I want a partner who is Affectionate, can reciprocate, and loves to snuggle and talk about their day, and what their interests are, and what makes them happy.
~Someone who can admit they get clingy or overprotective is a bonus.
~A partner with good communication is key, if something wrong we have to be able to talk about it.
~A partner who likes to game with me or at least watch me play would be a plus but not a requirement.
~Someone with a good sense of humor and like to joke around, I am a big goof after all and I love to joke around. Sending memes is always appreciated and good to cheer people up too!
~I'd prefer someone with the same music taste, but not a requirement, Plus if you wouldn't mind if I send you love songs occasionally that's a bonus, or sending me some back haha.
~Being willing to voice call is a must, Texting forever is not the way to go. I have to know what your voice is like haha, later on we can video call if you are comfortable with that. I prefer chatting on Discord because Reddit messages of any kind I'm sure you know are unreliable and sucky in general. So please send me your discord if you have one :)
~I would LOVE to see picture of your pets if you have any. Bonus points if it includes your beautiful self haha.
I'm sure there is more I'm looking for but I cant think of it right now haha, I will have to edit this when I think of it.
Please tell me about you as an opener! I told you a good bit about me, now its your turn haha.
Tell me some things like -
~What's your name?
~Where are you from?
~How old are you?
~What are your hobbies / interests?
~What about my post interested you?
~Where is my TV Remote?!
~Selfie? Pet pics?
~Hit me with your best joke or meme :)
~What's your favorite candy?
I'd LOVE to get to know you, and see where things go.
But yeah, I know it was long I'm sorry haha. Send me a message and lets get to know each other! :)

There's a long list of those insane rules I was forced to live by against my will when I was growing up:

1. Speak only when spoken to
2. You will do only as you're told
3. My house is not a democracy; it is a dictatorship!
4. Girls are useless
5. Girls should always be protected and kept safe at all costs, but only from that big, mean, scary, evil outside world!
6. Girls should never be trusted, let alone be allowed to, make their own decisions for themselves because they're too stupid to do so
7. Never question my power over you
8. Never think for yourself; let us do all the thinking for you
9. Girls are fragile and delicate flowers, but not within your family unit because within this family unit, you will just sit/stand there and quietly take all the abuse that we choose to dish out on you with a smile on your face and then thank us for correcting your bad behavior and paying attention to you at all!
10. You will listen to whatever music/radio station we tell you to listen to
11. You will wear only what we tell you to wear
12. You will only eat what we tell you to eat
13. Women and girls cannot do "men's things" (i.e. burning CDs, fixing cars, go camping, etc.)
14. Boys are allowed to be as man as they want to girls, but girls are not allowed to ever fight back or even defend themselves
15. In other words, girls do not have a right to defend themselves, ever!
16. When we beat you up, never grab our wrists or put your hands up in the air to shield your face or even tell us to "stop"; just remain silent and keep your hands down at all times instead like a good little victim should do!
17. You are not allowed to dye your hair or get any piercings outside your earlobes or even get tattoos, ever! Because your body belongs to me and only me!
18. No long dresses/skirts allowed in your closet
19. No anger or crying or laughing or showing any other emotions
20. No thieving
21. Infodump your special interests (I'm autistic, mind you) on me about your special interests (for me, it was Tiny Toons, Cartoon Network, Nicktoons, anime, etc.) and I will deny you any desserts in addition to not letting you have those interests anymore because they're not ladylike!
22. You dare ask me for accommodations and I will scream at you in addition to falsely accusing you of walking all over me/treating me like a slave because I am your parent, not your slave and I will NEVER accommodate you!
23. Autistics are stupid and useless and they need somebody to keep them alive at all costs
24. Autistics should never learn how to drive
25. You are not allowed to even watch preteen shows on Disney Channel (i.e. Kim Possible, Lizzie McGuire, That's So Raven, The Proud Family, Boy Meets World, Even Stevens, Sister Sister, Moesha, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, So Weird, Phil of the Future, The Cheetah Girls, etc.) because they will make you boy-crazy and we can't have that!
26. Girls and women should only have husbands instead of boyfriends/girlfriends
27. You are not allowed to listen to any songs about dating, just having sex and how to do it
28. You can only date when we die
29. You are not allowed to leave the house alone or even ride the bike around the neighborhood under any circumstances
30. You are not equal to us but a slave and a doll!

What about your Nparents' insane rules that you were forced to grow up with?

Poor Shigeta, he could have won, but he decided to touch a sensible subject

WAR
A few days later, my phone buzz-chirped. I opened my messages to find several pics of Dennis' Jeep, a blurry mess of lights, and a final shot of Dennis leaning back in the driver's seat with his eyes closed and his junk out and at attention. And there was a caption.
"Consider us EVEN."
I saw red. The possibility of finding peaceful contentment with Whisky was a distant memory. A figment of my imagination. I wanted blood. I wanted to slap Mary's fat fucking face senseless. I wanted to rat her out to Chuck. I was livid. Angry heat spread from my sternum to my shoulders, and the sharp sting of wrath radiated through my being. I rang Mary.
Mary: How does it feel, bitch?
I couldn't make words. I was shaking. My head was spinning. All I could muster was a meek little, "Why???"
Mary: You owed me.
Me: Mary, I'm not screwing Whiskers. And how did you even FIND Dennis? Do you even LIKE him?
Mary: Totes! He's soooooo cute! We banged it out five or six times in his car, and then he told me to lie down in the parking lot. And then he pissed all over my titties! It was soooo hot!
Me: I don't believe you. Dennis is into some pervy-ass shit. But not piss.
Mary: Well, he told me you were too vanilla to do anything fun.
Me: YEAH. I didn't wanna get butt-blasted without a rubber by a guy who couldn't even be bothered to show up when we had plans. That's not being vanilla. That's having self-respect.
Mary: Guys don't like girls who make a big deal about self-respect. It's a major turn-off. That's why I get so much more boom-boom than you do. Hey! Now that we're done fighting, you can pick me up and take me out for sushi! I'll teach you how to make men happy and then you'll owe me dinner. I obviously pleased Dennis when you couldn't.
Words failed me yet again. I shouted a much, much filthier version of, "GO SCREW," hung up on her, put on my sneakers, and ran aimlessly through my neighborhood until I almost collapsed. Once I trudged back home, I smoked a shit-ton of cigarettes and drank a shit-ton of vodka (for me, which was like... three shots) and really did collapse.
Up to this point, I felt like I had been patient with Mary. More patient than she deserved. I probably hadn’t done her any favors by allowing her to behave like a fucking maniac while I did nothing more than gently suggesting alternative behaviors. I still wanted to have faith in her ability to grow (emotionally). But all of that came crashing down. For some reason, my formerly improved sense of self-respect crashed as well...
I texted Whisky, planned to meet him at his townhouse, and successfully banged him. It was absolutely a hate bang even though I didn't hate Whisky at all (yet). I'd never engaged in hate-fueled intimacy before. I didn't realize those two states could co-exist like that. As reluctant as I am to admit it, it was cathartic. And it was also admittedly unfair to Whisky because he had no idea what was happening. I had just used him to make myself feel marginally better about a guy I guess I still had some kind of feelings for.
In case I've been unclear, I'm fully acknowledging that my actions were immature, inconsiderate, and indefensible. Don't bang somebody just because you're mad at somebody else, kids. Nobody wins. Well, it might feel like winning for a short time. It's NOT. It's bad behavior. And I absolutely hold myself accountable. Did I deserve to get verbally abused by the psycho neckbeard lurking behind the mask of the man I’d just hate-banged? No. Unequivocally, NO. But would Whisky have been well within his rights to dump me in a spectacular fashion if he’d realized what I was doing in that moment? Abso-freakin-lutely. Hell, I would have totally deserved it if he’d booted me out of his house butt-naked and screamed insults from the window. An isolated hurling of insults is not the same thing as chronic verbal maltreatment within the context of a relationship. But that's a serious topic that feels out of place in this story.
So instead of calling me on my crap and giving my butt the boot, Whisky remained oblivious to what was going on in my misguided mind and took the hate bang to mean that our relationship had just gone to the next level. And he became even sweeter and more affectionate towards me. This made my skin crawl because all my feelings for Dennis (both good and bad) had just come flooding back with a vengeance. I had no idea what to do with them. Part of me wanted Dennis to hug me and apologize. Part of me wanted to punch him in the dick. Part of me wanted Whisky to hug me and assure me that I had value as a human being even if some Golden God hadn’t chosen me to be his partner. And then part of me wanted to snap at Whisky every time he touched me. "You're NOT the one I want, Asshat!!!!!!!"
But the truth was... I didn't really want Dennis anymore. I mean... I wanted him in theory, but I didn't want the real version. He was a flake. He was nasty. I couldn't wrap my head around his inconsistent, albeit devout, spiritual beliefs. He was indeed a braggadocious butthead. I suspected that he wasn't even a very nice person beneath his affable veneer. Even so, I was irrationally irate with Mary for deliberately stalking him and seducing him. Did she really think that would make me look at my relationship with Whisky differently? I hadn't stalked him. I hadn't even pursued him. In fact, I'd rejected him several times (albeit not out of respect for Mary). How are these two situations alike??? What am I failing to see here??? Maybe I was the villain. I certainly wasn't innocent. But neither was Mary.
I mean... Mary was friggin’ MARRIED. And she'd been going around blabbing indelicately about all her supremely nasty boom-boom (whether real or fabricated) with Whiskers, Scumbanger, Tech Guy, Artistic Director, and the Hoggs. How the living, breathing, God-forsaken FUCK had she decided that she was entitled to sexy time with my (former?) crush just because I was dating ONE of the innumerable guys she’d stalked once upon a time???? Gaaaahhhhhhhhh!
And then it got even worse. Dennis was almost finished with his graduate program and was planning to move to New York that summer, while I still had another two years to go (counting the internship). But we both worked in the Neuropharmacology Lab that semester, so I still had to see him every week. Even though nothing had happened between us in a long, long time, I never knew if Dennis was going acknowledge my presence or look right through me. The power of invisibility isn't all it's cracked up ti be. But the next time I saw him, following the Mary tryst, he very deliberately approached me and said in an almost apologetic tone, "Val? Can we please talk after lab?" I nodded.
He asked me to get in his car, but I couldn't stand the thought of sitting in the ghost of Mary's snail trail. I insisted that we sit in my car, and he didn't protest. The familiar scent of mandarins and mountain air wafted through my Prius as I steeled myself for a confrontation.
Dennis: I think your friend stalked me...
Me: The crazy bitch with the big boobs?
Dennis: Yeah... She messaged me on Facebook and she was talking like you'd told her about me and thought we should hang out. I said we should call you and invite you to come along, but she said you had a boyfriend. Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: I'm dating someone. But what does it matter?
Dennis: Oh. I guess it doesn't. Anyway, I met her at this 24-hour diner. She drank like... ten beers even though I told her I don't drink. She kept talking about her cat or something...
Me: Whiskers?
Dennis: Yeah.
Me: That's a guy. She used to have a thing for him.
Dennis: That’s a guy’s name??? Weird. Well, anyway... She got all sloppy and literally started doing mouth stuff to me under the table.
My stomach turned and my blood boiled. "I don't need to hear that. She already told me all about your night. She sent me pictures of your dick and she told me how you peed on her in the parking lot."
Dennis: She said I WHAT??? Babe! Er. Um. Val! I would never do that.
I gave him a skeptical stare.
Dennis: Hand to God! I didn't pee on her. But, wait... She took pictures of my stuff???
I took out my phone and showed him the pic. Dennis blushed ferociously and looked away. Finally, he said quietly, "I'm so ashamed of myself."
I sighed. "You're always ashamed of yourself. That's why I stopped fooling around with you. It felt like you were ashamed of me, too."
Dennis: Babe! No. I just have to get right with God.
Me: Well, have you talked to God about Mary?
Dennis: I'm not ready for that one yet. I feel dirty. Like... dirtier than usual.
Me: Well, now I feel kind of guilty. She's mad at me because I'm dating a guy she used to have a crush on. She went after you because she knew I used to have a crush on you.
Dennis: You had a crush on me??? For real?
At first, I scoffed (thinking he was being sarcastic). Then I looked at his wide eyes and realized that he might have actually been that clueless.
Me: Yes, Dennis. I massively had a crush on you. You knew that. But I was apparently too vanilla for you, according to Mary.
Dennis: What??? Babe! I never said you were vanilla. I said you were classier than her.
Me: Well... Thank you? If that really is what you said to her, I appreciate that.
Dennis (striking his version of a smoldering pose): So. Uh... You still have a crush on me?
Me: I think I'll always wonder what could have been if we were each just... slightly different people. But I had to move on. I knew you didn't like me in that way, and it wasn't fair to either of us.
Dennis: Well, for what it's worth, I wish it had been your mouth the other night.
I finally smiled a little bit. I wished the same thing. But I didn't say that out loud.

Oddly enough, having that somewhat respectful, somewhat reassuring conversation with Dennis quelled my anger at Mary... a little. Don't get me wrong; I was still pissed and I never let her get close to me again after that. But I also never made a big, dramatic show of telling her off. In my mind, that would have invited more unnecessary drama. By tacitly distancing myself and henceforth keeping her at arm's length, she wasn't able to freak out over anything and I was able to keep her out of my business.
Years and years later, even now that Mary is a functional person with a healthy BMI, and much better manners (most of the time), she is still wont to bring up her tryst with Dennis. While I genuinely applaud her for putting in the work and making some sensible changes, I'll never be super buddy-buddy with her again. The fact that she still throws Dennis in my face to this very day makes me suspect that there remains a touch of cray in her gray matter.
And where Whisky was concerned, I had finally felt some sense of closure with Dennis after the aforementioned talk. So I leaned into a new relationship. And it was fine at first. Not super hot, but also not super weird. Having learned from my disgusting mistake, I know that I tend to get tempted to speculate about incredibly offensive crap regarding Funky Whisky whenever his behavior is unremarkable and not in keeping with the delightfully repulsive tone that this audience tends to enjoy. So I'll end this chapter here. In the next proper installment, I'll finally shed some light on The Goblinization. But before I wrap things up, I need to write a one-off about The Pie Guy and bring back some classic cringe!

(First time poster )
So, I don't know where to start on this one, but I'm having a hard time processing this situation and need help. I did start seeing a therapist but it's been a while so I guess I should go back, but here goes.
I met my husband roughly ten years ago and his Mom seemed ok for a while. When we were dating, she even invited me to do paint nights with her which I thought was nice. She did like to gossip a lot to me which in retrospect I see now was a 🚩#1.
Things seemed ok until my BIL got into a new relationship, and his girlfriend came clean with me: She asked me how my relationship is with MIL is and I said it was ok, why? And she proceeded to tell me that MIL gossips and talks badly about me non stop. Especially after coming back from visiting my house. BILs girlfriend was uncomfortable with this and told MIL that this was mean and uncalled for and even before she met me she felt bad for me and thought we'd get along, because she too had been victim to bullying and this is what this felt like. MIL responded with "you don't know her".
Anyways she told me the kind of things MIL was saying about me and it was not nice. Basically she would observe any kind of issue or conflict in my life but emphasize it to be super critical with absolutely no empathy and often full on lies to make me look bad and I now understand, to turn my husband's siblings against me. Which she has from the beginning of my and hubby's time together (2014).
For example, in 2021 we moved to a new city so we could buy a house and uprooted my 3 yr old daughters entire life. She had a hard adjustment and picked her face for a while (it was also summer so mosquito bites are what started it) she also regressed and wet the bed for a bit. She then adjusted and was just fine.
MIL turns this into "OP is anxious and is making her daughter anxious" Her daughter is anxious and it's OP's fault". I haven't suffered with anxiety for a while. It was only the year we got married, and I was better with medication. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Nor did I share any of my mental health struggles with MIL so she's making an assumption at best.
She complains that I'm lazy and do not do housework or cooking to her satisfaction (she was a SAHM and I am not). I should mention hubby and I have a 50/50 type deal with household and child minding. We both work. 🤷🏼‍♀️
I asked my hubby respectfully to never fight with me in front of MIL but he has, And like a snake in the grass she then tells everyone all about it, but turns it into something it wasn't. Not lying per se but emphasizing the dysfunction without any empathy or recognizing her own sons role in all of this.
My husband for his part has been very hesitant to set boundaries with her, but also emotionally keeps a distance from her. Then a few years ago, he told me MIL was responsible in the past for breaking up his relationships with other girlfirneds by making his partners feel uncomfortable 🚩#2.
It appears that recently the lies and gossip has been escalated. She makes me feel uncomfortable in my own house. I catch her darting dirty looks at me and then when I notice this, she switches it to giving me a fake smile.
She has no poker face and I sense the hostility whenever she's around.
The only time I let her clean my house without me getting up was when I was very pregnant with my son and exhausted. Yet she still tells anyone who will listen how lazy I am.
Last time she was over, I asserted myself more and would be firm with my boundaries. I also made it clear when her opinions were wrong / uncalled for.
It was this past winter and she took it upon herself to clean my back porch (we don't have a garage and it was messy). I told her to please stop cleaning my back porch. She explained she was here to help so she might as well help. I said I would rather she didn't. She asked why. I said because it feels like judgment. After a pause she said well you're family so you don't need to feel that way. When I told my hubby he was shocked and complained that she was supposed to be visiting her grandchildren (who were sitting in the other room, alone). She seems more interested in passive aggressively making me feel like I can't keep house. Again, I WORK FULL TIME. I have two small children and I do what I can. My house is far from a disaster, but I'm sure the crumbs you can see on my floors are enough to warrant her disapproval.
Overly judgemental and appears not to "approve" of me for her son 🚩3 and 4.
The worst recent situation was thrifting with MIL, which used to be the only thing we could bond over. I took my daughter and while shopping, she carelessly grabbed at a teacup I was buying and it smashed on the floor. As a Millenial who is trying very hard to gentle parent (despite the fact I was never taught self regulation by my boomer parents) I got on her level and told her that it wasn't ok to do that in the store and to observe the consequence. My daughter usually doesn't do stuff like that, and she felt bad so she burst into tears. I then spend time holding her in a hug and comforting her until she felt better. Employee came by and told me not to worry about paying for it as it was an accident. MIL immediately went home and told BIL and BIL gf that I yelled at my daughter in a store and made her cry. That was NOT what happened. In fact I'm positive if I had been permissive and not disciplined her in the store, she would have bad mouthed my parenting as well. This time I let BIL know that his mother lied about this situation and I'm incredibly frustrated and angry with MIL.
BIL is strongly enmeshed with MIL and his willingness to believe MIL opinions as fact is one of the reasons his relationship with the present girlfriend fell apart. He's also an alcoholic and refused to stop or get help.
I suspect the reason MIL tries so hard to destroy my character and BIL GFs character is because she does not want any attention on her and her horrible actions.
She secretly started seeing the man she had an affair with in the 90s again, causing her relationship with FIL to dissolve and they divorced (dead marriage for years). To pay for said divorce, she remortgaged the house and convinced BIL to co-sign. As soon as he did, she moved in with her 90s affair boyfriend and told BIL she could not help with the bills anymore since she had committed to her 90s affair boyfriends mortgage (my husband and I suspect this was her plan all along). The stress of the financial situation definitely pushed BILs addiction further, but he also has anger issues and mental health issues.
My husband for his part is furious and refused to accept this 90s affair boyfriend of hers who caused him all kinds of childhood trauma (which she won't admit to). He's happy for her but wants no relationship with this man. I also think that she's trying to create infighting between the siblings and our marriages so no one confronts her for her actions. Husband also has a sister who (surprise surprise) hates my guts and treats me like shit.
She tried to push my husband's boundary about 90s affair boyfriend and he doubled down, causing more distance.
After BILs relationship broke down, I was so stressed out from emotionally being involved that I'm now not talking to MIL or BIL but she keeps dropping messages to wish me happy Easter or happy mothers day.
I told hubby she is no longer welcome in my home so the last few times he saw her they met with our children out of town and I stayed home.
Question is: do I just cut her off entirely with no explanation or do I give her a reason and outline why I am going no contact? Since she won't change (narcissist) husband is not willing to go to therapy with her. I feel like the only way I can get over this hurt and pain I'm still processing is either confronting her or going no contact and blocking her on Facebook.
Any advice????