Cute things to text boyfriend while on vacation

my boyfriend caught feelings for my friend and once he realized he told her they can’t be getting close anymore, he wasn’t planning on telling me until the girl said she would tell if he didn’t. Before this he snapped other girls, saved pictures of them in chat and complimented them. But this the girl he caught feelings for he told her he was losing feelings for me and wanted to break up with me and called her the prettiest girl he’s met. He said he don’t know why he did that and he wasn’t thinking when he said those type of things. When he told me about it i broke up with him. He’s always been really sweet to me and he seems very genuine. I don’t know how to trust him again because he keeps on talking to girls when things get bad. He bought me stuff and said he would do anything to make this up to me and he seems very genuine, he unadded every girl on snap and deleted a few socials without me asking. He’s my best friend end and i’m his best friend iend so we’ve been texting a lot still and it seems like it never happened other than me making jokes about it to him to cope with it. He’s been calling me love and baby things like that. He begged me to stay with him but i told him i need time and we could maybe try in the future but i don’t know if it’s a good idea. I trusted him with everything and it seemed like he would’ve never cheated on me, he changed my perspective on love since this is the first time i’ve gotten cheated on, he was my first with a lot of things and we clicked really fast. I just don’t know how i’ll find someone as good as him other than the cheating.

I (F18) take love seriously, and when I love, I love hard.
I met this guy (M 18), who is now my beloved boyfriend, last March through a friend. I really don't like going out, but that day was different. To give you guys some context, this guy and me are in the same school publication (we are both writers) and we have mutual friends. I didn't notice him at first, but ever since my friends talked about him (I asked them if they know someone who can play bass for our band), I couldn't help but to think that "Woah, he's interesting." I didn't have the intention to talk to him or have some relationship with him (I am really not used to that, plus I am really a busy person), but I guess the universe has its own plan.
That same night, my friends invited me on a discord call, and there I saw him on the call. Being an awkward person I am, I was just silent the whole time, even though my friends are subtlety setting me up with him. I didn't like it at first (I was flustered but I didn't want something to happen), but eventually while he talks about his interests (my friends were asking him for my sake), I just can't deny the fact that he's cool. Well then again, I wasn't saying anything. Not until he mentioned dinosaurs, which piqued my interests.
And that's how our conversation started. We were strangers, but that night? God, we talked for hours, to the point that it seems like we've forgotten that we're in a group call. Plus, he was playing with our friends too that time. However, I didn't overthink it. I just thought that maybe he's being friendly, but nah, his and my friends says otherwise.
Fast forward, we talked and hung out in real life (since we are schoolmates), and that's when I realized that I am catching feelings. I am not lying when I say that everything just feels so right, everything felt natural, talking with him and being with him brought color to my dull life. So then, the next week, he confessed. It felt so genuine, like really.
"I know it's weird because we just met properly last week, but I can't help it. I want to get to know you more, not as a friend. Because I like you." He said.
It was overwhelming for me because yeah, given the time span, it felt fast. I felt absurd that I liked him already in that time span, but can I really blame myself? How could I stop myself from falling for him? Fast forward again, we've been talking and going out, and just last April 30, we made things official.
However, I am feeling conflicted. I do love him, but the question of "Are we going too fast" kept popping. I have two past relationships, and all of them were bad. Now, I am scared that this time, it'll fail again. Which is leading me now to unintentionally pushing him away. I am so scared to trust him, and I am so scared to show affection to him. Maybe knowing his past was also a factor. I know that I shouldn't bothered by it, but God, i am really bugged. He used to drink and smoke, but he stopped. He had been in relationships too that involves intimate stuff. I feel so conflicted.
One more question, why do I feel distant with him whenever we talk? I feel like our conversations had become shallow and now I am starting to feel like I am drifting away because of that, and I know I shouldn't feel that way. He's really trying to talk to me, but for some reason, I can't help but to feel like there's a barrier between us.
He's really a great guy, he assures me, talks to me even though sometimes I can't say anything (I need to work on that), so now I am here asking for advice. What should I do? How do I deal with this feelings?
I badly want to make this work, I don't want to hurt him like this, and I really want it to be him.

This collaboration project between CommonPresent Games, Five Frights, 3D FredWare Studios, and an anonymous music producer have all collaborated to make the ultimate conclusion to the Five Nights at Bingo's games.
Explore the abandoned Bar & Grill that was said to be nothing but an urban legend... 55 years after it's closing.
Your name is Cory. You go to explore the ruins, inviting your friends Clyde and Jack to come along with you.
A large sinkhole has formed underneath the building in the show stage, leaving the place in ruins and mostly caving in, especially in the middle of it.
INTRODUCTION CINEMATIC
You arrive there at 11:30 PM, and you text Clyde and Jack to come. They say that they will be there by 12:00 AM. You then walk in, and you explore the place, and then you enter the security office at 11:59 AM. You then get a text from Clyde saying that he is almost there, and that he gave Jack a ride, as well.
NIGHT 1 - It is now officially 12:00 AM. The building has entered it's lockdown state, not letting anyone or anything get in.. or out. You run to look at your phone, and then you very quickly connect it to the barely functioning security cameras in the building, and once you go onto the Show Stage camera, you will see Moltenstein emerge from the old sinkhole, who is a melted together fusion of the extremely rotted Bingo and Blossom animatronics.
DIALOGUE: What even was that thing?! I have to get out of here! This bulletin board right here says that lockdowns can take 14-21 days to end?! 14-21 DAYS?! It's okay.. I can do this. I brought my portable wireless charger for my phone. I just need to get that.. thing... away from me.
Moltenstein will sometimes appear at one of your doorways. You have a left doorway, a right doorway, and an opened ceiling vent. Turn off your phone's flashlight if you see it, in order to get it not to kill you, and activate a nearby camera's flashlight in order to attract it towards that camera's location.
There are only 6 functioning cameras. They are all the Show Stage, New Lobby, Left Hall Entrance, Right Hall Corner, and the Dining Area.
The Show Stage is where Moltenstein will emerge from. It will then make it's way towards the New Lobby, Left Hall Entrance, or the Dining Area.
The Dining Area's camera is broken, forcing it to face the right side hallway, where there is a vent entrance nearby.
All of the cameras have an internal flashlight that was applied during the investigation of the premises right before it's closing. These internal flashlights all work surprisingly well on the still functional cameras, and they are good for attracting light sensitive animatronics nearby. Moltenstein is very, very sensitive to bright lights.
Your phone's flashlight will always be on by default. Hold down CTRL in order to shut off your phone's flashlight, making it incredibly hard to see, but stopling Moltenstein from killing you, and sometimes even making it leave.
Your phone will lose 1% battery power every 2 seconds (you instead will lose 1% of your phone's battery power every 5 seconds whenever your flashlight is turned off..). Using a camera's internal flashlight will make it lose an extra 3% of it's battery power.. immediately. You can recharge it to get an extra 35% but this takes roughly 5 seconds to do......
NIGHT 2 - Ugh.. I need to get out of here! I am starting to see things. I can't do this anymore, come on!! Why me??? It's whatever.. Clyde and Jack called me this morning, and they said that they were worried. I told them about my situation, and they said that they have notified the authorities, but they didn't believe them. Those people really think that this place is fake. How funny of them...
Memory Citrus and Memory Lizzy can now be seen. These are just hallucinations, however. If you ever see the original Citrus flying through the Dining Area, put down your phone quickly, or Memory Citrus will jumpscare you, causing for you to throw your phone onto the ground in panic, attracting Moltenstein towards the light, giving him a 20% chance to kill you after somewhere in betweenn 7.26310-8.54790 secondssss.
If you ever see the original Lizzy standing in the middle of the lobby, put your phone down quickly, otherwise Memory Lizzy will appear floating in front of both of your doorways, and all of your cameras, making you unable to see them, all while you lose 1% of your power every 0.552 seconds. This effects lasts.. just about..... 10 seconds. And yes, this does cause your phone's flashlight to glitch out as well, luring Moltenstein to your location.
NIGHT 3 - This has to be the last night.. Surely the police have realized that I have very suddenly gone missing... Right? Please, just let this end. No more!
Memory Buttercup can now sometimes appear in one of your doorways. Shine your phone's flashlight at her in order to make her go away, or else, she will jumpscare you very suddenly, causing for you to have a heart attack.. and... well, die.
Memory Caesar and Memory Chuck seek to both be always found together now, and they can now sometimes appear in one of your doorways. Pull out your phone and look at it in order to deter them away from the security office that you are hiding inside of.
NIGHT 4 - Hey, hey! It's me, Jack! I just wanted to tell you that Clyde called the police... yet again.. and now they are starting to take us WAY more seriously! They said that they are attempting to locate your phone.. But it needs to stay charged up to at least 50% from now (12 AM) up until 6 AM, or we will not able to locate you, AND YOU WILL DIE. You gave us the wrong directions for what reason, anyway, you idiot?!
If your phone's battery drops down below 50%, you will be immediately just.. killed by Moltenstein.
NIGHT 5 - Hey, hey! It's me, Jack! We got your location! The police are headed there, now... Let's go, man! You're gonna make it home, by tonight!!! But.. You need to stop yourself from using the camera's built-in internal flashlights. Apparently, the cameras share a union power generator system, hence why they still work, and they only have about.. 8 charges left. It is pretty crazy, actually, right??? So just.. be careful, dude. Bye, now!!!,,,
If you use the camera flashlights 8 times, they will be disabled, and Moltenstein will be immediately teleported to your door, and he will kill you after approximately 2.5-3.5 seconds.
NIGHT 6 - Listen, man. I'm sorry, okay? But you entering that establishment has awakened and set free the mess in there, and I cannot afford to be chased down by that thing... You see, my grandpa was at that place for a re-evaluation of it's safety.. for... an incident. And that was not even his first time there! I'm sorry.. But you will not be making it out of there alive. I have released an overwhelming amount of a special secret gas recipe into the building, causing your hallucations to feel the most real possible, meaning that they have a 50-50 chance of giving you a heart attack and.. well, kill you. I also adjusted the union power usage to only allow for 6 camera flashes, and.. now, you must also always keep your phone charged. You can NOT recharge it. Have fun, Cory.
(This night ends at 4 AM, as the police and Clyde will break into the building and save you at that time.. exactly.)
ALL ENDINGS
Good Ending - During Nights 1-5, keep your phone's battery above 30%, and do not ever use any more then 6 camera flashes in each night. This will give you access to the Old Lobby, where you will find Buttercup, Citrus, Lizzy, Caesar, Chuck, and an unused Endoskeleton during the Night 6 Escape Scene. You will then get the option to scrap or take with you each and every single one of them as you walk up to them, letting them rest now as nothing but legends if you scrap them all. You will then see a scene of Jack getting trapped inside of the building, right as you guys escape...
Bad Ending - Follow Jack's instructions, and leave with Clyde and the police on Night 6 without making any discoveries. You will then see a scene of Jack escaping the building, right as you guys escape...
Happy Ending (Canon) - During Nights 1-5, keep your phone's battery above 30%, and do not ever use any more then 6 camera flashes in each night. This will give you access to the Old Lobby, where you will find Buttercup, Citrus, Lizzy, Caesar, Chuck, and an unused Endoskeleton during the Night 6 Escape Scene. You will then get the option to scrap or take with you each and every single one of them as you walk up to them, but if you take them all with you, you will then see the location rebuilt with the recovered and repaired Bingo, Blossom, Citrus, Buttercup, Lizzy, Caesar, Chuck, and the brand new Tropico The Toucan animatronics. Tropico The Toucan is an amazing newly built counterpart friend for the now happy Citrus The Toucan animatronic character.
We will be collaborating on FNaB 6, just as we did with this game, to introduce the continuation to the game series, and it's amazing and wonderfully unique storyline. We have amazing plans for this next entry of the series, and they will all be shared on here.. very, very soon.

I have been trying to be supportive and patient but i don’t know how much longer i can do it.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for not too long now. And from the start we just clicked. We have friends that said it was like we’d known each other for our whole lives when we’d only known each other for a very short amount of time before we started dating. Everything was going great up until this last week.
Backstory: My bf joined the marines after his dad died last year. He’s from oregon but was stationed out in my state. Recently some news has come up regarding his father’s autopsy report in the last week and my bf has been a silent warrior since.
I have barely spoken to him in the last week with the last 4 days being the hardest. He’s been busy with work but only works 7am-4:30/5pm. He hasn’t been texting or calling like he used to everyday. Thursday morning he sent me a text after not talking to me for almost 24 hours saying he wanted to break up. I decided that if he was going to do that then I needed to give him his things back so I went to see him that night. That night he told me after trying to speak to him about what’s been going on he said he still wanted to be with me. and was saying things like “i’m scared i’m going to fk up” and “i just don’t want to end up like my dad” as well as giving me news he was being shipped off to california (we’re in NC currently) possibly at the end of next week (aka this week we just entered). so it was my understanding that we were still together but i was going to give him a little more space. It is now sunday morning and i have only spoken to him during a 5 min phone call yesterday around 4:30pm. He hasn’t read a single message I’ve sent him since thursday night.
Is my relationship over?

Okay so I just needed some kind of advice because I’m confused and hurt. I have been with my Girlfriend for over 2 years, we used to have sex regularly, I’d say about 4-5 times a week. She always told me she loved it and was happy, but at the start of this year things started to slow down. We started having sex maybe once a week. But then it started to become once a month and now I’m lucky if I even have sex with her once a month. And it hurts so much. To know your own girlfriend doesn’t even want to be intimate with you just horrible. For a while I put it down to the stresses of her job and stayed quiet. But a few weeks ago we went on holiday, at this point we hadn’t has sex for about two months. We had Ana amazing time and the thing is she would act like she wanted to have sex with me, until it actually came to it. She would be flirty and touchy and even tell me that she was horny etc. but up until the last day, whenever I initiated sex, I was turned down. I found it confusing that she acted like she was attracted to me and wanted to have sex me all through out the day, but at the end of the day I was still getting turned down. When I did finally try and talk to her about it she got angry as she thought I was just being selfish and just wanted t have sex. Which is not the case, of course I want to have sex, but it’s not the no sex that is killing me it’s the fact that someone I love doesn’t want to be intimate with me. We had sex on the last night, and she said she loved it but now I just don’t know how to feel. Tbh I don’t know if I even believe she enjoys it anymore, it’s just killing my confidence. We got back from holiday and again went weeks without having sex. I bought it up again trying to figure out what the reasoning is but it just turned into a massive argument and I just felt like a bad boyfriend. I never really got a reason, I was just told I was being selfish. We had sex once a week for about two weeks after the argument but then it stopped again. It got to the point where I just gave up, I don’t even initiate anymore because I already know what the outcome will be. However the other day she asked me to buy some condoms as we had run out, so I did. Logically this made me think that she maybe wanted to have sex or at-east was thinking about it. However I bought the condoms and they have just been sitting there unopened for days. I have tried to initiate sex with my girlfriend but again got turned down. It’s been about two months again and this is something I need to talk to her about because it’s killing the relationship and my confidence. It’s making me feel so insecure and I just feel so unconnected from my Girlfriend. But I also just feel unloved and unwanted. How do I bring this up to my gf without it being an argument?
TL;DR my gf always turns down my initiation to have sex how do I talk to her about this without it being a massive fight?

I (26 F) met my boyfriend (33M) on reddit a year ago. He's from West Africa and I'm from South Asia. He reached out to me regarding some comment I made on another sub. We got talking and started liking each other. He asked me to be his and I said yes.
Things were smooth for a while. But with each passing month, he'd talk less. Now, it's almost me who initiates the conversation 90 percent of the time. I communicated the same to him but he keeps saying he's unwell or he's dealing with hectic work schedule. I am tired of all this. I feel constantly sad and anxious. We did have fights about this, we tried to go no contact but we'd get back together everytime because he'd say he missed me and I'd give in. I thought these are compatibility and communication issues and gave all my efforts to fix these.
I am dealing with a lot in my life already. This just keeps making me upset. I make efforts to facetime or voicecall but he mostly declines citing some reason. He said he'd try and change but I don't see it. If I try to have a conversation about this, he says"For the 100th time, I don't function like this".
He says he has strong feelings for me but his actions speak otherwise. He ghosts me for 2 days and comes back messaging as if nothing happened. Any efforts towards confrontation will result into fights and I'm so exhausted, I'd rather not have any argument.
The last time I wanted to leave him, I almost had a panic attack and ended up going back to him. I don't want to lose him but there's this constant fear of "What if he's not interested in me anymore?" Or "What if he's actively pursuing someone irl?". I don't know if these are my irrational fears or I'm getting played. I feel like I am the only person holding this bond together. Do I let him go? Or do I give this a little more time? I'm so confused and sad. This is my first LDR.

So I'm talking to this really cute girl I met on hinge for I don't know over a month...i usually reply late to her because I do not want to come off as eager and needy and that I have other things to do as well. she even mentioned it that I reply late twice but she doesn't reply instantly either..
the thing is our texting's going really great and we usually have something to talk about but there has been a mistake on my part that I've been complimenting her too much.. she sent me a voice message for the first time yesterday cus she was too lazy to type and I just felt a need to compliment her voice so I just wrote 'your voice is pretty' and she replied with 'just because someone sends you a voice message doesn't mean that you need to compliment it'
ideally any other guy in this situation would apologise and maybe reach out more...but I don't want to do that nd change the way I text... What should be the ideal reply to her?? So that I avoid coming off needy or desperate...

Hey Reddit, so I (14f) had a pretty weird teacher (42f) a few years ago that I would really like some advice about. So at the start of 6th grade, I was really depressed, and decided to tell my teacher at the time since I hadn’t told anyone else. She started talking to me almost every lunch break about the stuff I was going through. I ended up telling her I was questioning my sexuality, (I’m a christian and have now realized that I’m straight). Anyways she started to over validate that, telling me all her political and religious views. She would almost act as my therapist, and I’d also act like hers, as she’d always tell me about her messy divorce that happened about 10 years prior, and also told me advice that her own therapist gave her. I feel like she got creepily close with me and crossed some boundaries that she wasn’t supposed to. There was one time she hugged me without asking after I gave her a Christmas gift, which I found kind of strange, because I never initiated it. At the end of the year she gave me a rock and gave me some sappy words and told me to keep going and stuff. She said I could put it in my pocket or something, and then she said she has a rock that she puts in her bra, which I was pretty weirded out by. She also would tell me during our talks at lunch break how to do chores and stuff, and was acting like she was my mom. She taught me how to make spaghetti and do laundry, which I found pretty strange because she knew I had a really good mom that was highly involved in my life. I also had her in third grade, and she used to always trash talk her boyfriend's daughter and vent to us about random things, and again tell us all her political views. She would trash talk her hockey billets and was crying one time and asked us our advice on which school her hockey billet should go to, as he got expelled. There was one time in 6th grade, where there was this kid with some mental issues that was acting out. She made us third graders all form a circle around her going around and saying things we didn’t like that she was doing while everyone was crying and freaking out. At the end of 6th grade, she left and went to teach at another school. This literally broke me and led me to a really depressive state, as I basically idolized her. I’d fantasize about her adopting me or me getting abused and going to live with her. She’d go on to send me quite a few emails into the next school year, asking how I’m doing and things. Eventually when I came to my senses, I sent her an angry email expressing how I felt like she crossed a lot of boundaries with me. She just responded saying to contact kids' help phone, and we’ve never spoken since. I went to the principal about it when I was still at that school, and she just brushed it off, saying she’d talk to the teachers at the next teacher meeting to be more careful. She didn’t at all validate my feelings, and it’s not like she does with anyones, and there’s been fist fights at that school where no parents were called. Anyways I'm just wondering if I’m crazy and this is all in my head, or if there’s anything I can do. Because I almost k*led myself because of her, and now she just makes my blood boil. I apologize if this is really stupid. I’ve told my mom about it but she doesn’t take it that seriously either. Oh and the teacher also would call me “miss (my first name)”, when she’d never cal any other student any pet names, and also would always talk to me with the door locked and would trash talk her colleagues and the school.

TW: SA Heads up it’s a long post
AITA for telling my whole family by a family Facebook post about how my sisters fiancé sexually assaulted me? Here’s some back story.
My sister (mid 20s) and her or was her fiancé (early 30s?) have been together for years and have have known each other since she was around 15. I’ve been around him since I was 4 as he used to be my neighbour and my sister’s friend (he was dating another woman back then and was also having kids at the time). I always felt off about him even being only 4 and turns out I was right. Growing up I had full grown adults joking about me having a “crush” on him (a full grown adult man btw” and that always made me feel uneasy.
Just before I turned 18 last year I had a massive breakup with my almost 2 year boyfriend while also grieving a loss of a love one (my exs dad). While we were going through the breakup process (was still 17) my sisters fiancé started to get weird and my ex had to reply to him while we were breaking up as well. I then turned 18 and things got worse (I won’t be going into detail). I briefly told my mum that he was being weird and flirty but I told her not to tell my sister at least not yet as I was already going through so much. He then started sending me inappropriate pictures and saying inappropriate things and much worse things that is a bit much for anyone to hear. I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t want to A hurt my sister and B thought people wouldn’t believe me anyways. This went on for months.
Then it started happening in person. So I finally broke to my sister one night after it had gotten worse. I had small proof but not enough proof. I had screenshots of him telling me about his sex life and also screenshotted me telling him I would tell her about everything that happened with him also threatening me if I did. None of that was enough. She even said I was the one flirting and messaging him which was actually the other way around. I did text him a few times to make sure he was ok after bad medical episodes though. She pushed my mum away for not telling her as well as myself. A couple weeks after she did break up with him but really not much was different they are and we’re still hanging out. They have a kid together so he goes there for his kid apparently but he’s there a lot more than that. I also seen pictures of them hanging out and being really close.
Yesterday I was thinking about the situation a lot. I was thinking about how my whole family was still hanging around him without many issues. I was thinking about how immediate family wasn’t telling other family and family friends what was really happening. I was thinking about how everyone was painting my sister as the victim and nobody cared to reach out to me. I was thinking about how other girls and maybe even kids could get affected. I was thinking about how I’m only 19 going through all of this. I got really angry with how I was being treated and made a rash decision to make a post on my Facebook saying “For my family deciding to hide the truth.. The fact you let your own daughter,sister and etc be sexually harassed by “family”and just move on and pretend nothing happened disgusting. The fact you can all hang out and pretend you're family with him is disgusting. To hardly believe me in the first place with proof is digusting. I'm done hiding the truth about everything that affects me in my life so people can look "good". This is not ok. Get mad at me for telling people? Maybe you should've cared about what I went through. Barely 18 getting harassed by an almost 30 yr old. I’m done being quiet about peoples behaviour (in general). It’s mentally and physically draining”.
After posting this I didn’t know whether to regret it or not. My aunty messaged me to say that he has to be around for the kids and that’s they need to for good parenting. I explained they weren’t hanging around just for his and even so is he good for the kids?. She ignored me. I then had my mum call me dozens of times but I ignored it. She messaged me to say that her, dad and my other sister don’t agree with what’s happening but I feel actions speak louder than words and that it’s almost hard to believe. My mum had also told me something I didn’t know which was that my sister messaged my ex when I first told her and probably to ask about the messages between him and my sisters fiancé I was angry about that because we had been broken up and no contact (still are) for at least a year and she knew everything I went through with him. My dad messaged me to see if I was ok maybe he is feeling the same as me I don’t know. A couple weeks ago he went to talk to my sister about being civil with me and to get along even with the situation going on so maybe my dad is on my side but again I don’t know and wish the actions were bigger than the words. After small texts back to them I decided to go to sleep.
Today I woke up to my sister telling me she’s cutting all ties with me altogether and we are basically no longer sisters etc she also said the same for my nephew (only 3 years old). she then went on to say how I was slandering my nephews father publicly on Facebook and that it wasn’t ok. She then went onto say that I didn’t have any real “proof” yes she used those marks. She said I will no longer be able to see my nephew again who’s only 3 btw. She then said “ if you think I’m going to allow him (nephew) around someone who is publicly bashing and slandering his father on Facebook, you have another thing coming. Felt like a threat tbh. I didn’t fully know what to think and I still don’t. I pretty much ignored and didn’t reply to the message all I said is she’s not getting an argument out of me. I told my friends what was happening they didn’t listen and nobody really is. I do have therapy but there’s so much other stuff I need to talk to my therapist about and a therapist can’t fix my whole family. So was I wrong for the post I made? What do I do?

Well hi there! How's the week been treating you?
Mine's been alright, but that's not what you're here for is it?
You saw the title on this post and now you're all curious right?
I bet you're wondering what boyfriend stuff includes? Let's start with:

• Getting texted back regularly with an option for phone calls!
  
• Going out on dates with possible holding hands or making out!
  
• I'll make you laugh with all sorts of jokes from the sophisticated cynicism, cutting sarcasm to childish fart jokes I can do it all!
  
• You can get home cooked dinners! And breakfast too if I'm working overnights!
  
• You'll get all sorts of attention and compliments!
  
• I'm emotionally available and completely over my ex's!
  
• Flowers!
  

....and so much more!
Sounds pretty great right?
But who am I?
I'm a nearly middle aged divorced ex stand up comic that's worked himself into full on burnout working in hotels for the last twenty years. It's made into someone that's very empathetic and caring while still being to be cold as ice when needed.
In my free time I'm kind of a traditional nerdy white guy. Gaming, cartoons (not anime though), science fiction, detective stories, alternative history, sketch comedy, various sitcoms, hiking, cooking and mowing the lawn occupy my off hours. I also tried getting back into writing again, but it's been challenging.
Now it's your turn! PM me and we can start planning the first date!

My friend (we’re both mid thirties) has a terrible boyfriend that she’s been with on and off for 5 years but has never been happy with - he’s emotionally abusive, financially controlling, and gaslights her over everything, making her feel insane. When they got back together after a few months break (which was supposed to be permanent) and he immediately continued the same behaviour, I’d made it clear that I could no longer support her when it came to her relationship with him: this was because for around a year before that she’d been calling me in tears late at night/early morning, several times a week after they’d had an argument, and I then supported her through the break up only for her to return to him. The amount of emotional bandwidth she relied on me for throughout that whole time was disproportionate and I couldn’t deal with it again, so that’s why I set the boundary. She has made something of a big deal about this at times, including at a hen party last year - and at another one she had a breakdown about her relationship generally. Sober, she usually respects the boundary, but lately she has been blurring the lines. A few months ago she told me several times that she’d be breaking up with him, while also telling another friend they were going to be buying a house and trying for a baby. She had started sending me the familiar “I need a friend, are you free” messages that I know are her wanting to discuss her relationship, and so I tell her I’m busy because I’ve made it so clear I don’t want any involvement, especially knowing that he hasn’t changed from things she has said, and things she has told our friends. I really value my friendships (I’m single and I have a small family), so this is hard for me, and the first time I have had to set such a boundary, let alone repeat myself on it. She is incapable of being without a boyfriend, and when she is single or not getting adequate attention from men she will demand it from me, and then disappear as soon as she gets the male attention again. I’ve accepted that, and we’re part of a long standing friendship group that I love, so I don’t want to cut her out of my life, but she is so intense and I’m sick of reminding her of the boundaries because I end up feeling like a total bitch. Am I?!

I (26f) met this guy (31m) from tinder over a month ago, the first date went good and lasted for a long time. He asked me in person if I'd like another date with him because he did. We're both looking for a serious/long term relationship and we have a great connection in person. I accepted the date, we kept talking every once in a while, and a month later (we're both quite busy and he works late at night) we went on a second date. Everything went good as well, we had a few romantic interactions and we kissed quite intensely, we were both a little disoriented and dizzy. He told me he was reassured that I liked him back and we both verbally agreed it was clear that we had something, some kind of attraction to eachother. After this date, he messaged me to check on me and I messaged him back, trying to maintain the connection we had, and then he kind of stopped texting me. Everything was fine.
The thing is, he told me he's not really fond of texting but I personally think at least 1/2 texts a week could be reassuring and encouraging. I don't want to overwhelm him with texts so I only send 1 or 2 few per week to check on him. Once, I asked him if he was worried by anything since he wasn't answering (it was kind of a way to give him the opportunity to tell me if he wanted to cut off with me or if he needed time etc) but he said everything is fine and that "he is just being himself". Sometimes, he ghosts me for a few days before asking me out on crazy dates like a trip (I had to decline because of work). So it's always hot and cold with emotional roller coasters.
A few days ago, I opened up a little bit to him, telling him I miss him (not in a dramatic way, I kind of brought it with a dash of humour). He saw the messages but didn't respond. I don't feel like trying to text him again because I feel like it just hurts me to rarely get an answer.
I was pretty confident and feeling it when sending it, but as time goes by I'm afraid I may have scared him off. I thought it was ok because he's already been quite direct with me. He made almost all the first moves towards me and shows genuine interest for me in person (also the trip together that I had to decline). We even talked about things we could do together this summer etc. I now feel a little bit shameful and dumb.
I am LOST and don't know what to think about this. I obviously would like him to tell me if he doesn't feel it anymore rather than ghosting me so I can move on. I also developed feelings for him so it makes everything harder. I didn't tell him tough. It's not "love" but I do care for him. Should I give up ?

Now that we have all read the other post, I'd like to take a moment to defend myself.
The client first contacted me on 05/06 @ 1:53Pm see quote request below. Note that there is no mention of the vehicle being inoperable.
https://imgur.com/a/uWQf4sb
The quote was provided @ 3:19 pm that day
https://imgur.com/a/WoV7XYO
It was not disclosed that the vehicle was inoperable until after a price was provided. Please note that this could be considered deceptive and that the price was not adjusted to reflect an inop fee as it should have been. Once I hand down a quote the price doesn't change. Period.
https://imgur.com/a/o8AeXID
Client contract was signed 05/07 @ 6:31pm
https://imgur.com/a/Sz4Loc1
The first carrier was booked 05/09 @ 11:54 am for pickup on the 10th and delivery on the 11th. This is where things start to go south. See the screen below. The client had provided incorrect pickup and contact data.
https://imgur.com/a/JWo1Vh8
This next screen is important. The pickup location closes at 4 for the weekend, I've now lost one carrier and have no options for weekend pickup. The best I can hope for is to schedule it over the weekend for Monday pickup, which is quite challenging.
https://imgur.com/a/qaa6GOA
After causing us to lose Friday through the weekend, we start Monday with a threat to cancel. Please note that the fee's I mentioned are in the contract that the client clearly hadn't read before signing.
https://imgur.com/a/ZjQnDC1
Mon 05/10 3 hours later the load is booked for pickup on Wednesday. The comment I made at the bottom is important. I had assumed the carrier was onsite when they had only called ahead thusfar. I admitted to this and apologized for it on the phone. Clearly my miscommunication.
https://imgur.com/a/FbXKP15
A few hours go by and the truck is running late. That's what trucks do, they run late. But at 8pm, I'm still in communication with the truck and the client. From this point, I call it a night and head to bed. Having worked with this carrier before I was confident that they'd pick up. Which they did.
https://imgur.com/a/C1rSsFQ
Thursday morning, more unwarranted threats. But the unit has now been picked up and is in motion. It was picked up around midnight and timestamped pictures were provided as proof. I reply to her texts 30 minutes before day starts in an effort to ease her mind.
https://imgur.com/a/YCci7Zi
Here I am again, trying my best to help the situation. The move was just under 1100 miles and the vehicle was picked up 10 hours prior. What kind of update exactly are you looking for? Clearly the driver hasn't started their day yet.
https://imgur.com/a/qEWfgZw
Apparently this is where I made the grave mistake. I missed 2 calls and a text from the client through the course of my day. Apparently that is good reason to go full nuclear on a service provider and call names.
https://imgur.com/a/YUjl7Ac
https://imgur.com/a/oPsH6gD
My rebuttal. Again keeping in mind that if we had the correct data, the car would have been delivered days ago. At this point, I decided it was best to cut communication to avoid things getting any worse. The client had made it clear there was no way of making them happy.
https://imgur.com/a/3BiLn2B
https://imgur.com/a/lMDLvlT
Fast forward to Saturday morning. The car delivers first thing. Admittedly later than the target of
https://imgur.com/a/QitjmW2
Friday. However I had warned the client straight away that while reliable, this carrier does tend to run late. Here I'm met with more sarcasm for literally no reason.
https://imgur.com/a/HIZqOmF
Here I am in touch with the carrier trying to get us an update as requested. Note the amount of time between my requests and their response.
https://imgur.com/a/uEsmrWz
As has been displayed, I've done everything to help with this client. The initial problem begins with the failure to mention the car being inop and leads into bad information causing us to lose a few transport days. None of which was the fault of myself or any of the carriers involved.
At the end of the day, the vehicle was picked up on Wednesday as promised, traveled 1100 miles in 48 hours and was delivered unscathed. Aside from an unreasonable and unorganized client causing issues along the way, I don't see the issue. As always I made every attempt to perform to the best of my abilities with this move.
And when I attempt to defend myself, the client decides it is ok to belittle and berate me while using abusive language.
https://imgur.com/a/R0CKewd

so me (21m) and my girlfriend (25f) had a disagreement on the proper way to respond to people trying to shoot their shot over the phone. I think the best response is no response, as i feel saying nothing is a response and a very powerful one. She believes that the best way to respond is to tell the person she is in a relationship. I think this gives them a chance to plead their case. I feel like people that say things like “ where is your boyfriend now” or “i bet i could treat you better” are quite common.
It honestly doesn’t bother me that that is her stance because i trust her and am thankful that she turns down advances. The issue arose after an ex (24f) hit me up out of the blue with drunk texts telling me that after me she dealt with shitty guys, and basically sent me a song, and a voice memo of a slurred speech starting off with “good bye te queiro mucho—“ but i shut off the memo and decided to not listen to the rest. i then told my gf and chose not to respond as i knew this would just lead to an explanation and a guilt trip of how she knows she should honor the no contact rule but wants closure and talks we already had long ago.
My girlfriend said that me not responding is like leaving the door open for the future by not disclosing i’m in a relationship. I feel like i don’t owe my ex or anybody an explanation on why i don’t want to speak to them, and an explanation wouldn’t strengthen my loyalties . I think it’s only important that i know i’m in a relationship and that i know i want to respect that relationship. so i do not need to waste time explaining that to people that won’t be in my life. despite this i did respond and tell my ex that i’m in a relationship and not to contact me.
The next morning the explanation and guilt trip did come from my ex about how her boyfriend told her she should make things right with me. (weird) and in a moment of drunk desperation that’s how she decided to go about it. which that explanation made no sense to me as did many other things about that relationship. she then said that it weighs heavy that we act like each other don’t exist when i see her in town. i replied with no hard feelings just nothing to say to you. i’m not doing word for word of what she said but that’s the meat and potatoes. she then said she would go back to no contact and i didn’t reply told my girlfriend everything and she just said that my ex sounds kinda crazy. I agreed and we moved on.
TLDR: so in conclusion what is the best way to respond to dms? wether it be from an ex or a random person trying to shoot their shot. does no answer leave the door open?

Am I wrong for telling my family publicly what happened?
TW: SA Heads up it’s a long post
AITA for telling my whole family by a family Facebook post about how my sisters fiancé sexually assaulted me? Here’s some back story.
My sister (mid 20s) and her or was her fiancé (early 30s?) have been together for years and have have known each other since she was around 15. I’ve been around him since I was 4 as he used to be my neighbour and my sister’s friend (he was dating another woman back then and was also having kids at the time). I always felt off about him even being only 4 and turns out I was right. Growing up I had full grown adults joking about me having a “crush” on him (a full grown adult man btw” and that always made me feel uneasy.
Just before I turned 18 last year I had a massive breakup with my almost 2 year boyfriend while also grieving a loss of a love one (my exs dad). While we were going through the breakup process (was still 17) my sisters fiancé started to get weird and my ex had to reply to him while we were breaking up as well. I then turned 18 and things got worse (I won’t be going into detail). I briefly told my mum that he was being weird and flirty but I told her not to tell my sister at least not yet as I was already going through so much. He then started sending me inappropriate pictures and saying inappropriate things and much worse things that is a bit much for anyone to hear. I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t want to A hurt my sister and B thought people wouldn’t believe me anyways. This went on for months.
Then it started happening in person. So I finally broke to my sister one night after it had gotten worse. I had small proof but not enough proof. I had screenshots of him telling me about his sex life and also screenshotted me telling him I would tell her about everything that happened with him also threatening me if I did. None of that was enough. She even said I was the one flirting and messaging him which was actually the other way around. I did text him a few times to make sure he was ok after bad medical episodes though. She pushed my mum away for not telling her as well as myself. A couple weeks after she did break up with him but really not much was different they are and we’re still hanging out. They have a kid together so he goes there for his kid apparently but he’s there a lot more than that. I also seen pictures of them hanging out and being really close.
Yesterday I was thinking about the situation a lot. I was thinking about how my whole family was still hanging around him without many issues. I was thinking about how immediate family wasn’t telling other family and family friends what was really happening. I was thinking about how everyone was painting my sister as the victim and nobody cared to reach out to me. I was thinking about how other girls and maybe even kids could get affected. I was thinking about how I’m only 19 going through all of this. I got really angry with how I was being treated and made a rash decision to make a post on my Facebook saying “For my family deciding to hide the truth.. The fact you let your own daughter,sister and etc be sexually harassed by “family”and just move on and pretend nothing happened disgusting. The fact you can all hang out and pretend you're family with him is disgusting. To hardly believe me in the first place with proof is digusting. I'm done hiding the truth about everything that affects me in my life so people can look "good". This is not ok. Get mad at me for telling people? Maybe you should've cared about what I went through. Barely 18 getting harassed by an almost 30 yr old. I’m done being quiet about peoples behaviour (in general). It’s mentally and physically draining”.
After posting this I didn’t know whether to regret it or not. My aunty messaged me to say that he has to be around for the kids and that’s they need to for good parenting. I explained they weren’t hanging around just for his and even so is he good for the kids?. She ignored me. I then had my mum call me dozens of times but I ignored it. She messaged me to say that her, dad and my other sister don’t agree with what’s happening but I feel actions speak louder than words and that it’s almost hard to believe. My mum had also told me something I didn’t know which was that my sister messaged my ex when I first told her and probably to ask about the messages between him and my sisters fiancé I was angry about that because we had been broken up and no contact (still are) for at least a year and she knew everything I went through with him. My dad messaged me to see if I was ok maybe he is feeling the same as me I don’t know. A couple weeks ago he went to talk to my sister about being civil with me and to get along even with the situation going on so maybe my dad is on my side but again I don’t know and wish the actions were bigger than the words. After small texts back to them I decided to go to sleep.
Today I woke up to my sister telling me she’s cutting all ties with me altogether and we are basically no longer sisters etc she also said the same for my nephew (only 3 years old). she then went on to say how I was slandering my nephews father publicly on Facebook and that it wasn’t ok. She then went onto say that I didn’t have any real “proof” yes she used those marks. She said I will no longer be able to see my nephew again who’s only 3 btw. She then said “ if you think I’m going to allow him (nephew) around someone who is publicly bashing and slandering his father on Facebook, you have another thing coming. Felt like a threat tbh. I didn’t fully know what to think and I still don’t. I pretty much ignored and didn’t reply to the message all I said is she’s not getting an argument out of me. I told my friends what was happening they didn’t listen and nobody really is. I do have therapy but there’s so much other stuff I need to talk to my therapist about and a therapist can’t fix my whole family. So was I wrong for the post I made? What do I do?

Nature of Humanity Ch 67 A NoP fic
Under Pressure Part 10
A Fanfic of u/SpacePaladin15’s work “The Nature of Predators.” Thank you for the story!
___
Memory transcription subject: Silvera, Factory 13 Manager
Date [standardized human time]: November 4th, 2136
If it wasn't for the clearly artificial sky above my head someone could possibly convince me I was outside in a new park. The neon blue screen with a white dot to represent the sun was nothing like the actual pale gray visage a mile above. Yet, it did have an enjoyable warmth to it.
A smooth artificial wind swept through the saplings ensuring that they would develop healthy stress wood. It also pleasantly cooled the fur of anyone in here, providing a nice little respite from the heater simulating the sun's unbearable hatred of us. Fuck you fake sun!
Any flora used to decorate the park would be exotic to Frozen Mountain, even if it came from the nearby tundra, but my humans decided to do something interesting. While they had covered most of the ground with a soft short-growing Terran clover, they chose to make the rest of the decorative plants functional. All of the saplings were different types of fruit trees that, when mature, would be free for anyone to harvest as much as they want. Even the decorative topiary isn't hardy tasteless plants, but berry bushes that would provide a variety of sweet treats relatively soon.
Agurcorp was more than happy to allow its failed startup out here to be turned into a local park. Well, so long as they didn't have to pay for this expensive mistake of theirs. The Mayor was all too happy with this, especially since my humans were happy to let him have all the credit so long as they got to design the park. With voting season right around the corner, the Mayor that ‘Brought life to this blighted land’ was a shoo-in to get re-elected. Or would be if he also wasn't ‘The idiot who allowed predators into the city.’
With everything that's happened I am still a bit surprised at everyone currently enjoying the park. A small herd of Venlil are exercising in the open field. A family of Gojids are walking along the cobblestone path. All the while, some humans are playing a very weird game of throwing a round plastic plate into chain nets. It's almost as if this city didn't have two separate riots on the same day.
The sound of wheels traveling across a bumpy path caught my attention. I glanced across the way to see an embarrassed-looking John driving an electric wheelchair over to me. His eyes locked onto mine before quickly switching to the ground. He tried to laze in a chair designed to enforce good posture and looked rather silly as he adjusted himself.
He came to a stop just a foot away from where I sat, “Hey Silv… I, uh… I don't actually need the wheelchair but Mikvia threatened to break my legs if I didn't use it, so I'm just humoring her.”
Oh, don't freaking tell me. Why are humans like this… “John… you were hospitalized with a punctured lung. Sure, doctors have some miracles they can perform these days, but you know you shouldn't be stressing yourself by walking.”
He huffed, “Please, I'm fine. Really. It wasn't as serious as everyone is making it out to be.”
I thumped my hind paw against the ground, “John.”
He threw his hands into the air with a huff, “I'm in the damn wheelchair ain't I? Gawd…”
He grasped his nose before calming down, “I apologize. Shouldn't have raised my voice like that. I mean… I am using the wheelchair and not lifting stuff. Doctor's orders. They even said getting out in this park would be fine. Said it might even help!”
We let out a deep sigh together. I hopped down from my bench and back up onto his lap, “Let's go for a ride… while we figure… us out…”
I could see John's guard drop as the exhaustion crept back onto his face, “...alright...” He pressed his controls forward, and we slowly began our first lap of the park.
John wrapped one of his lanky ape arms around me like a fleshy seatbelt and I laid my head on his chest appreciating the contrast of his warmth with the cool artificial breeze. I could have slept like this. The beating of his heart was rhythmic, and his deep breaths sounded a bit like waves washing up on a shore.
I even heard his heart quicken as I cleared my throat, “So… we aren't really dating are we?”
His exhaustion was quickly replaced with unease as he started to fidget a little, “I'm sorry…”
I held his hand and stared into the ocean blue eyes of his, “Don't be sorry. I think we were both drunk when we agreed to go on a date…”
He shook his head, “I still should have said something before then.”
It wasn't like I couldn't have taken the initiative and talked to him sooner too, “I know you were going through a lot. Actually, I know you still are… I'm really only able to guess but… Are you one of the types that thinks Xeno-dating is weird?”
He looked ashamed as he scrambled to smooth things over, “I- No- well, yes- but- it's just… ok. Let me start over… alright… yeah… so… uhm… the thing is… how do I put this… it sounds bad… well, it is bad… it’s just…”
My tail wagged involuntarily at the rather cute display of embarrassment radiating from John. I leaned in and let him have a doey-eyed look to help heap the embarrassment on.
It felt like John tried to stop the next words from rolling out of his mouth, “Sometimes I have trouble thinking of you all as people.”
John came to a complete stop as I just stared at him wide-eyed. My brain struggled to grasp what he was saying and the implications of it. He cringed and covered his face with his hands, “Gawd, that sounds horrible. It's just… It's not as bad with you and the others… I talk to y’all a lot. It's easier for it to click that you are people too.”
I was desperately trying to see this from his angle, “Wha- why does this happen in the first place?”
His hands drug down his face trying to drag the flesh with it, “I think it’s cause you are always naked. Like your back brace helps a little bit, but still everything else is… That and I hear your voice and the chip in my head then gives it meaning. Like its disjointed. Then it's the way your body language works and- and- fuck. Just…. Fuck me man. I don't even think that's all that's wrong with me. It’s just… like you look, sound, and smell like animals. It's just not really what my mind had in place for aliens. So- like- ugh! Why can't I just explain it!?”
It's difficult to explain, but his words connected to a deep sad memory, “It's like everything is just too… slightly wrong…”
It felt like I had been whisked back decades to my own childhood. I could still smell the bleached halls of the Venlil orphanage on Nevis. My heart whimpered when the Sivkits who came to adopt me shuddered with fear and disgust. Their strange voices sounded slow as they spoke a strange version of Klipic. Like hearing a pale imitation of yourself, try and pretend to be just like you.
My eyes locked with his as I carried on “It’s like you look at them and a part of you knows what they are, but your brain just snaps back to… to what you think reality is.”
I could see a glimmer of hope well up with his tears, “Y-you know? I-Iv've felt like such a monster! How can I- How can I look them in the eyes when they took me in and say- say- that I can't see them as people sometimes!? After everything they've done for me?! They want to adopt me and I- I- I can't even!”
I wrapped my arms around his neck as he buried his face in mine. It felt like he could crush me with his arms, yet they held me gently. What was causing me pain was this damn back brace. The blasted thing was trying to force my arms down while it hunched me over. I wiggled out of John's embrace and ripped the freaking thing off and chucked it as far as I could before burying myself in his embrace again.
We held each other as he drew in shuddering breaths and let his emotions flow out. John’s grip eventually began to loosen and we both took a moment to calm down. I gently tugged at the shirt covering John's torso, “So… Us not wearing clothes constantly is… disconnecting for you?”
He nodded his head, “Y-yeah… It’s like… every person I have ever known wears clothes. Animals never wear clothes and at most wear like a collar or harness if someone owns them. Then a few months ago, a bunch of nudist aliens show up and… well, my brain lops them into the animal category and the translator isn't helping.”
I glanced down at my body and suddenly felt… exposed, “So now that I am no longer wearing clothes…”
He cringed, “You look more like a large rabbit thing than a person… when you had the brace on it helped a little, but you were on all fours… When you were wearing your weather suit and had your hood off, It felt like you were a person, just different.”
An idea crossed into my skull, “Ok then… so your brain attaches personhood with a level of nudity, body plan, and familiarity… take your shirt off and give it to me- Don't give me that look! I know you’re male and are far less sensitive about people seeing your nipples. So gimme.”
He begrudgingly took off his shirt, revealing a pelt of fur that caught me off guard. I shook off the confusion as I slipped his shirt overhead and stuck my arms through the sleeves. It immediately tried to slip down my body and off. Mostly due to how large the hole for his head is, but also due to my utter lack of true shoulders. Another gift of my freak mutation. The ability to walk upright as well as sprint on all fours like a fucking Arxur.
I bunched up the collar and knotted it on itself, solving the slipping issue. With a small twirl, I spun in a circle, “So how is this?”
A smile formed on his face, “You look adorable!”
I happily flicked my tail, “Is that girlfriend adorable or pet animal adorable?”
His grin beamed with happy, mischievous energy, “Little sister adorable.”
I stomped my hind paw again, “Wha- why?!”
He held out his arms and I hopped back into his embrace, “Its cause it's my shirt. Jamie would wear my clothes sometimes, and they were so baggy on him, and well… on you that's practically a sundress! … you’d look really nice in like… a yellow sundress with like a straw hat.”
My mind tried and failed to make an image to match his description, “Hrm… well… I wouldn't know where to even start getting a… sundress.”
John carried on like clothes shopping was a normal intergalactic thing, “You would have to go to a tailor and have it custom-made. Like you already had to adjust my shirt cause you don't have shoulders like we or the Gojids do.”
We sat in a comfortable silence as John started the wheelchair back on its path. I almost fell asleep in his arms before I asked, “So… Are we dating?”
John didn't hesitate to bend over and freaking bite the top of my head! I, rather fruitlessly, slapped my paws against his face as fast as I could and only managed to elicit a laugh from him. Jumping up, I got a mouth full of his cheek in my teeth.
I made sure not to crush as I mimicked what he had done to me back, “Ah! The turns! They've tabled! I'm sorry! We're dating! Augh!” I spit out the lump of flesh between my teeth and sat down rather proudly.
It was only then I looked around to see most of the nearby groups staring at us. As well as three silver suited flame whack jobs walking our way. One of them held up his paws to try and seem as big as possible, “YOU! PREDATORS! DON'T MOVE!”
John growled at them, “YOU FUCKING IDIOTS. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?”
The trio froze in their steps and reached for weapons they didn't have. The boldest one took another step forward and shouted, “SHUT UP PREDATOR!”
John held his issued jacket up, letting the reflective emblem of the guild shine for all to see, “I WORK WITH YOU NUMB NUTS! I'M JOHN! ADOPTED SON OF YOUR FUCKING CHIEF! RING ANY BELLS?”
The trio halted in their tracks and the most skittish of them turned a one-eighty on their paws and began to walk away. The boldest one’s paws slowly dropped, “J-John?! I- I've never seen you without the mask or artificial pelt… wait! You're supposed to be in the hospital!”
Johns voice grew cold, “They said I could go out around the park so long as I mostly stayed in the chair. If it pleases you, you can talk to Loke. He's right over there with his wife and two kids. I bet he'd be thrilled to learn you three are going around accusing people of being predators.”
The bold moron took a fearful half step back, “D-d-d-d-don't twist my words! You bit her and she bit you back! I have witnesses! That's predatory!”
John leaned back and stroked the fur on my cheek, “No, it’s erotic.”
I could see the gears turning in the bold one's head grind, “What.”
John pressed his lips into my neck, “Ya know… sexy. It’s like… gently grooming your significant other's neck from behind but more playful.”
They looked revolted, “That's disgusting.”
John cocked his head to the side like a confused Gojid, “That’s odd.”
The look of revulsion quickly transitioned back to confusion, “What?”
A smirk grew on John's face as his fingers massaged into the sore muscles on my back, “It's just, that’s exactly what your mom said last night, but she grew to like it.”
I slapped my paws to my mouth to avoid laughing as the rage flared up in the bold one's eyes, “WHAT!?”
I let out a happy purr as John began to work at my sore muscles and utterly humiliate the idiot bothering us, “Yeeeeah. You weren't supposed to find out like this, but I'm your dad now.”
Their ears pinned back in rage, “You're lying to me.”
John waved a hand at our surroundings, “We are in a hermetically sealed park. There is no way for any significantly threatening animal to get in here. You are only here looking for trouble and I assure you, this will be looked into. Go clean your nose and keep it clean. Understood?”
They both tucked their tails, “Understood, sir.”
John nodded his head and calmed his tone, “Dismissed.”
As the trio of troublemakers left, we sat in relative silence as John continued to work away at the stress in my muscles. If you proved this was how humans prepared their food before eating it, I would argue that it's still worth it.
His rough voice messaged my ears, “Hey Silv?”
I stretched and enjoyed the pops my spine made as it took its natural shape, “Hrm?”
A hint of curiosity hung in his voice, “Why did you understand what I meant? Shouldn't… You've lived with aliens being a part of everyday life for… Like… ever right?”
I slumped against John and thought. Dredging up old memories that I almost wished I didn't have, “It was… a very long time ago. My doctor told me I was making up false memories to cover up a traumatic event and make it to where I was normal and everyone around me were the weird ones…”
I could hear John doubt my doctor's claims, “That sounds… fishy.”
Despite John's odd word choice, the meaning still fit perfectly, “It feels like it, but I just have no proof. I swear to you, I remember running along a beach, with my parents on two legs. Every Sivkit I knew as a child walked on two legs. It’s like… well…”
I grabbed John's hand to stop it from distracting me, “One day I woke up, and I was unbelievably cold. I thought I was a corpse. There was this strange… tentacle thing with bulgy eyes standing above me. His words didn't match his lips, but I understood him. It was terrifying.”
“He scooped me up and started running. Said I was in grave danger, and he was going to keep me safe. I didn't trust him one bit. He jumped into some strange ship and told me I had to be very quiet. The bad people would attack us if they heard either of us talking.”
“Eventually, he crashed the ship into something and pulled me out of it. I was surprised to see we had been on a submarine that entire time. That and the sky was the wrong color. I didn't even have an opportunity to think about it as he carried me to a weird looking vehicle that once again surprised me as a giant wall turned into a window.”
“I had never even heard of spaceships before, and I watched as we went up and just moved into space like it was nothing. He tried to calm me down, but he told me my parents were dead. I- just remember sobbing in his tentacles for hours. Eventually, I calmed down enough for him to play with me.”
“For a few days it was just me and him. Then we met up with another ship, and he left that one to drift in the void. He said we were meeting his friend Aylin on Nevis… a Venlil colony not too far from here, actually. I got to meet more aliens on that ship but Kalova- sorry that was the name of the Kolshian who took me out here. Kalova didn't want me to talk about anything to anyone. Said to just say I was his adopted daughter, and he just got a job on Nevis managing the new colony.”
“He never saw it. I didn't know what they were at the time but the Arxur attacked. They were trying to raid the colony and the Gojids and Venlil where desperately trying to protect it. I remember the alarm going off the second the ship’s captain announced we were leaving FTL. Kalova sprinted through the ship carrying me. He placed me in an escape pod just before that terrible lizard spotted us. He pulled the lever and my pod jettisoned down to the surface.”
“I was in that pod for three days before the Venlil found me and put me in an orphanage. Every time I met other Sivkits… they made my skin crawl. There's something wrong with all of them. I swear to you, we Sivkits are supposed to walk on two legs. We also aren't supposed to be that… stupid. Between how they talk being just… off, and the fact what they said was often either retarded or downright wrong, I couldn't ever feel like one of the so-called Grand Herd.”
“Eventually, I aged out. Graduated college, top of my class. And started working out here when they began to rebuild my plant after it burned down. That’s all there… Well, there is more, but It's not actually relevant to your question.”
John leaned down and kissed the top of my head, “Thank you for sharing that with me.”
I groomed the tip of his nose in return, “You're welcome. … Hey John?”
I could see a small bit of… hope in the back of his eyes, “Yes Silv?”
“Can you tell me about your past?”
He frowned as memories came back to him, yet he smiled still. “Yeah… it’s not a happy story either.”
I pressed myself into him, “Well… we can both be sad together, at least.”
John's hands began to absentmindedly work through my fur again, “Yeah… That doesn't sound as bad.”
___/\___
Important question, do you want a chapter dedicated to John retelling his story? Or would you like it smash cut out in favor of more of their first real date? I am not sure how I want to do it and am happy with both, so please let me know.
John and Silvera finally had the relationship talk! Woooooo! John's confessed something he'd rather never bring up, but knows he needs to address to start living a happy life with his new family. Aaaaand, It's time for Silvera’s tragic backstory! (Trademark pending). Strange names though, right? Kalova… weird how John's old boss has a missing brother with the same name as an alien Ivan the Arxur knows! And Aylin… strange they share a name with Talen's dead wife! Man that's just weird!
Special thanks to u/JulianSkies for proofreading! Seriously it felt like my eyes were melting out of my skull and your feedback was everything I needed!
___/\___
Directory
Library of BiasMushroom contains every link for everything I have written! Check it out as some stuff related to Nature of Humanity may not appear on HFY! As well as my little side stories and Fanfics of other NoP fanfics!
The Nature of Humanity
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Under Pressure
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For anyone posting to HFY do NOT select HFY first. It bugs out and doesn't work nice with copy/paste from google docs.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 8 months but we were friends for a year beforehand. Before we started dating, I planned a 4-month vacation to Europe. I’d been single for years and wasn’t expecting to get into a relationship. When I started seriously dating my boyfriend, we arranged for him to join me for the fourth month (he is in the military on training and that is all the leave he could get). A few of my friends are also flying over to join me for parts of the trip, and I’m visiting a friend in her country for a week.
I didn’t expect him to be over the moon that I’d be away for so long but I’m four weeks into the trip and I honestly feel like he doesn’t give a shit about me.
First, before I left I asked if I could share my AirTag location with him for safety. He said he didn’t want to because he’d be “too jealous”. I ended up sharing it with a friend instead. I had a sketchy experience in a cab and texted my friend to double-check my location to make sure I made it to my destination safely and she did, but it felt kinda shitty to ask my friend for help instead of my boyfriend.
Second, we still text regularly but he doesn’t ask about my schedule, ask how my flights or trains were, and honestly I think he’d have no idea where in the world I was if I wasn’t like “hey I’m doing this today!”. I stopped telling him about my itinerary to see how long it’ll take for him to ask. I’m not trying to flex on him but it feels like he’s got no concern for my safety or curiosity about wtf I’m up to? I know it sucks that he’s in training while I’m travelling but still.
Also, before I left I stayed on base with him for a week so we could spend a lot of time together. The day I left I wanted to have sex since we wouldn’t be able to for THREE MONTHS. He basically put it in, we had sex until I finished and then he jumped out of bed and got dressed because his friends invited us to play soccer. It felt like he was just leaving in the middle of sex to hang out with his buddies (who he will see every day he’s in training this summer!). I would have thought he’d want to have a bit of intimacy before we were apart for months. It hurt my feelings and he apologized and said he didn’t mean to upset me but like…why???
I’m wondering if I’m just being overly emotional because I’m overstimulated or if this is a red flag. I’m so frustrated and there’s still 8 weeks until he joins me.
tl:dr Currently on a solo vacation waiting for my boyfriend to join. He barely checks in on where I am/what I’m doing and refused to accept my AirTag request. Feeling like he doesn’t care but I’m also tired and overstimulated. Is this a red flag or am I overreacting?

A bit of an update on my last post. https://www.reddit.com/teenagers/s/ATjE93OSCb
I guess I am making this to rant. Life has been quite hard recently, and I don’t have much time to write. I have been thinking about the way I feel about her, and I feel like I can split it into four categories that interact with each other in strange ways.
Romantic attraction (?) To put it bluntly, I like her. But this attraction does not feel like what it should be. No “butterflies in the stomach”. But I notice her. No nervousness. No stumbling over words. I am not shy; on the contrary, I feel as stable talking to her as I am with any other classmate, provided that we are talking about something academic. But she’s cute. I can’t help but glance every once in a while. I don’t know her very well, despite knowing her for two and a half years. Despite this, I can’t avoid the urge to care about her. It is hard to explain much more without putting it in some more context.
Accomplishment Envy This is, unfortunately, a fairly overpowering theme. I am not a particularly driven person. Even though I know I am not very accomplished, I lack the motivation to push myself to do things. This has become a large problem in my relations with parents, especially with college applications peeking around the corner. My parents worry, especially my dad. He might ask me something like “[Name of acquaintance] just won this award. [Name of acquaintance] just got a high ranking in this competition. [Name of acquaintance] is starting a tutoring service, and she even got grants. How about you? What’s your plan?” He would say how tired he is of pushing me to do things, begging me to wake up to the fact that I don’t have much time left, pleading for me to spend more time on academics, on volunteering, on developing myself so that I don’t look like a fool on my college apps.
So where does she fit into all of this? She is an unavoidable example of what I am not. The contrast is stark. She has a great degree of self-control, self-fulfillment, and identity. She does good things, and is surrounded by friends who care about her. She is her own person, with her own drives and purposes, her own established and developing skillset. I don’t know what kind of background she is from, or what her past is like, but I feel that she will rise above the negatives, utilize the positives to the fullest, and become valuable to herself and people around her. I am a puppet of my parents, and I am starting to fail even there. Yes, I have been pushed into experiences, and yes, I have gained my own skills through those experiences. Yes, I have good intuition when playing games and thinking through the things I am good at, and yes, I like being helpful, especially when explaining things to my peers. I am known to be a good strategist, with good intuition and a willingness to help newcomers, in the gaming group I am in. But as my dad has drilled into me, week after week, month after month: Why can’t I do something productive? What is my plan? Seriously, what will I do with my life?
I understand, there are plenty of other driven people around me. I am aware that I have sampling bias, growing up with immigrant parents who value education and have experienced the effects first-hand, surrounded by people selected with established friend groups who push each other to do better. But the difference here is that she is unavoidable. The same attraction that makes me want to care about her also makes me notice all the things she can do. Studying for something? Talking with friends? Meeting new people? Working on things? Discussing the things she wants to do? Even simple things like asking a question? These things come naturally to her, just as they do to everyone else, and I wish I could say the same myself.
And this is where things start getting complicated.
I understand that what I have been saying makes it sound like I hate the feeling of being envious of her. But for some reason, it isn’t all bad. I get a certain comfort in thinking about her, and this seems to conflate itself with my preexisting attraction. I don’t know if I adore her character traits but am influenced by my existing problems, or I envy her character traits but am influenced by attraction. Two emotions I associate with “positive” and “negative” seemingly feel similar. I don’t know if what I feel counts as romantic attraction anymore; maybe it is just a habit that I haven’t grown out of. And that’s not all.
Curiosity and urge for human connection. I am aware that I may be idealizing her. She is flawed like any of us, but I cannot list any flaws off the top of my head. In combination with social isolation and romantic interest (?), I find myself wanting to get to know her better. I already know that she will never be interested in me in the way I am to her, but I want to learn how it feels to have someone actively approach me in conversation and talk about things.
The only times I have talked to her outside of an academic setting are in very rare cases, in the context of mental health and emotions — she feels like someone I can trust. But these are isolated incidents, and I know that she’s not responsible for me, that she has her own things to deal with. What’s stopping me from just… talking to her more? Talking about other subjects? Lack of motivation plays a big role, yes, but my primary issue is fearing how she thinks of me.
Fear of creepiness. I don’t know where this stems from. Perhaps I internalized something from childhood. Perhaps it is my lack of positive self-image, or a misunderstanding of my place among everyone else, or some combination of these, or something else. But I am averse to approaching girls in non-academic settings, fearing that I make them uncomfortable.
This ties many things together. It goes without saying that this stops me from talking to her as much as I would otherwise, but it is also why I try to suppress many of the other things I feel. I would not tell her most of what I say here, since I know that it would make her either avoid me or feel obligated to talk to me. I feel guilty for caring about her as much as I want to; she doesn’t need my attention, but I still find myself asking her if she’s alright when she seems tired.
I guess I’ll stop here for now, though I’m sure I am missing some nuances that I will remember later. In summary: I think I like her, in a way that I associate with romantic attraction. I also envy her — fuelled by my own probelms — in a strange way that mixes in with how I feel, creating a strange combination that makes me question whether or not I am actually feeling attraction. I seek to know her better, and feel that this might be possible; she is still willing to talk to me, albeit passively. Finally, I fear the way she may think of me.
This is more or less what I wanted to say. I posted this to rant, but I guess any help, information, or people who relate would be appreciated.

I (27F) am an avid traveler. When I think about the things that give my life meaning, traveling is at the top of my list. My goal is to take one international trip every year. When me and my boyfriend (34M) got together, we exchanged traveling stories and connected through them. I quickly found out that all of his international travel was done with an ex and I was a little jealous about it. According to him, they fought the entire time they were away and there was nothing to be jealous about.
When we first started dating, he was not in a good place financially. I told him about a travel credit card he should sign up for so he can start accumulating points that can be used to earn free flights, so that's what he did. About 6 months ago, we booked a flight to Japan that's scheduled in July with credit card points. Our plan was to spend 2 weeks there. This was my idea for my birthday. We have spent weeks planning it together and I was so excited we were able to do it. He had been so adamant about saving money for so long and this felt like a huge milestone in our relationship.
Until last week... Things have been rocky for a while...
We have been seeing a couple's counselor since February. Long story short -- He is a recovering alcoholic and could not control his temper once he got sober. I agreed to go counseling to try to sort it out, but I've gotten so resentful over time. Now I'm the one who's angry most of the time. We got into an argument and he broke up with me. This really felt like we were over over.
5 days later, we decide to try to work it out and I find out that he already canceled our accommodations with no conversation about it and is now bringing his friend on the trip. I get it that we were broken up and he was trying to make the best of the situation, but now we are back together... He wants us to go separately and meet up throughout. He expects me to stay in separate accommodations because he doesn't trust that we can't fight. He doesn't want to be in the same situation with his last ex where they fought the whole time or break up while we're abroad.
This feels like a make or break situation. My flight is non-refundable, though there is a chance the flight time will change and I'll be able to cancel it and get a refund. It feels like they hijacked the trip that was my idea, using the credit card I suggested... None of this would have been happening if it wasn't for me. I don't think I will be able to enjoy myself if I go. I can just see myself being so preoccupied with him the entire time. I have a friend that might be able to come along, though I feel I would just ruin our time by being so preoccupied with my relationship.
My options are:

1. Cancel the flight and eat the cost
2. Go and do my own thing separate from them
3. Go and spend time with them throughout the trip off and on
4. Get a friend to go and meet up with them (or don't meet up with them)

What should I do?

Hi guys,
I broke up with my boyfriend (1.5 years together), and I am going through... something similar to drug withdrawal. It is tough, and I don't have the equipment to survive this. Breakups are part of human life, but I have never experienced anything similar.
Although there was a clear reason why I had to do it, I am still ruminating and experiencing an emotional roller coaster. I wish I could have done things differently and kept him in my life, but relationships are two-way streets.
Also, I live abroad, have no family, and only a few friends. I feel so isolated and lonely now. I am afraid to be alone because I am used to his company. While I am okay one day, I get worse the next.
I'll shortly describe our relationship story:

• We fell in love after 2/3 month of meetung, and it was wonderful; he was full of understanding love and was so kind to me; from the beginning, I was his emotional support as he was in a bad state due to external factors
• While my love kept growing, he became different and difficult to deal with; I kept being kind and full of understanding because I thought that this was the right thing to do for someone I love so much
• Months passed, and he was rougher with me, in the phase of devaluation, continuing with mental and emotional abuse and gaslighting. I felt I was not doing enough for him, and while I was giving more, he gave less; I kept being absent in my mind, and was not such a lovely and optimistic person as before; this bothered him a lot
• I could not understand why I was his love one day, while the next I was a stranger to him; this confusion inflicted my head, and pain started to grow
• I can say I am an open-minded person, and I was tolerating a lot because that was beneficial for the relationship to grow, while his tolerance level was not matching mine - contrary to the beginning of the relationship; but I kept in my mind that he was in a bad place at that time
• He started to escalate his anger at me for silly things, and I felt scared and did not want to lose him, so I had to teach myself to act right before him. As a result I accepted shouting at me in public
• From that moment, everything went downhill; evidences of cheating were pilling up - first, I was ignoring; I gave him tons of "benefits of the doubt"; I caught him in so many lies with such unbreakable evidence, and still, this was not enough for me to wake up and stop this torture
• Finally, I snapped and could not ignore it anymore; while he was showering me with love messages, something was happening in the background. I felt it in my guts
• One day, he showed up with the consequences of his "cheating", but luckily, we did not have sex for a long time, and I was safe from it. I was furious and confronted him immediately about everything and said that I couldn't continue anymore; he denied cheating and put a UNO card - I was the cheater; he was angry and projected everything onto me; all of a sudden, I became a selfish one, a liar and not allowing him to have freedom, stalker for invading his privacy, crazy for assuming he is cheating or lying to me; he was mad I lost my trust
• I went no contact, although he tried to contact me back and again in a passive-aggressive way, blaming me for hurting him but thanking me for every support he received from my side; again, confusing

Note, this is not everything; I missed so many details I dont feel comfortable sharing - but I have tried to sum up how my feelings developed towards the end. I had plenty of good moments with him and greatly enjoyed his company. But he did not make me comfortable as before, and the feeling of trust continued to fade. Again, I was so confused and allowed myself to be anxious daily. I was struggling to make him happy - and those are his words:
"Don't be sad in front of me. I do not want to see you like that. I need you happy so I can be happy as well."
I know this all implies a manipulation from my ex-side (or possibly having NPD), but I still cannot believe someone would betray me like that. I worked hard to maintain our relationship, while at the same my feelings and mental health were like a small boat in the middle of the ocean. How come someone who loves me can make me feel depressed and sad at the same time? He is not a bad person, but if I switch off my emotional side, I can see this is a clear sign of abuse, but my emotions are still drawn to him. I miss him dearly and wish we could continue together by redefining our relationship.
Also, I am torn apart; one side feels he does not deserve me, while the other side wants him back as it was - and to avoid this void of loneliness I am experiencing right now. My love towards him was clearly a big chunk of attachment. I feel so lonely and have no one to talk to. I am crying a lot, even after a month. I'm not out to my family or friends; I only have one dear person I can talk to. He is such a support for me. But also cannot dump everything on him.
I have lost motivation to do anything, but I understand this is a time to lift myself back up. While loving someone else, I stopped loving myself.

I see so many post about people saying they love Tara yummy because she's herself at all times but......
Sometimes Being Yourself Isn't the Best Thing
There's a reason the phrase "you are your own worst enemy" exists. Just because something is "who you are" doesn't mean it's necessarily a good thing. Take the example of a narcissist - that might be their natural personality, but that doesn't mean it's healthy or beneficial for them or those around them.
I've been thinking a lot about this in the context of influencer Tara Yummy. At 16 years old, Tara was able to gain a massive following by playing into stereotypes and capitalizing on the attention of men. As a young impressionable girl, Tara learned that portraying herself as a "cute, sexy" girl who hangs around a lot of guys was a surefire way to get validation and success.
While Tara is undoubtedly beautiful, I wouldn't say she's truly confident. Instead, it seems she's very insecure and uses her image to cover that up. She's surrounded herself with people who don't seem to be genuinely looking out for her best interests - they use her personal experiences, trauma, and issues for entertainment and profit, often at her own expense.
On podcasts, I've noticed Tara's co-hosts make inappropriate comments about her personal life and even imply she uses drugs, all while gaslighting her when she expresses that she's upset. This kind of environment is clearly taking a toll on her mental health, but Tara seems trapped in this persona she's built since she was a teenager.
I think Tara needs to take a step back and reevaluate. Rather than continuing to lean into the "Tara Yummy" brand that's centered around male attention and sexuality, she should focus on empowering herself in more meaningful ways. She has so much potential to have deeper, more intellectual conversations and use her platform for good. But first, she needs to break free of this limiting mindset and toxic environment.
Being true to yourself isn't always the best policy. Sometimes we need to be honest with ourselves about unhealthy patterns and make changes, even if that means stepping outside our comfort zone. Tara is a prime example of how "just being yourself" can actually hold you back. With the right support and introspection, she could transform her brand and her life for the better.