im f 19 and ive recently been in a ‘situationship’. we’ve been seeing each other for around 3 months. the boy, lets call him jon, m 18, has said he dosnt want me to be his girlfriend after i’ve asked multiple times. we never said we were exclusive but we did say we wasn’t entertaining other people.
i went out the other night with some friends and another male friend who wasn’t out with us offered to pick me up and take me home to save me some money. this man had recently showed interest in me previously but nothing became of it. both me and jon have friends of the opposite gender and we were both okay with that.
i knew i liked jon a lot but he was planning on moving to a different state for college and i knew that’s why he didn’t want me to be his girlfriend. i slept with the male friend who offered to take me home. this is the first time i have seen my male friend since he showed interest in me a year ago and i have not previously entertained him prior to this night.
i told jon about it first thing in the morning. it’s safe to say whatever we had has gone. AITAH

My great grandfather served in the Austro Hungarian army, he was captured a few months in to WW1 but was held in Russia until May 1920.
I have hundreds of letters that he sent my great grandmother over this time (delivered by the Red Cross) - but haven’t been able to translate them yet. It does appear that he was moving around Russia quite a bit though (as opposed to being in just one ‘camp’).
He went on to make it safely home, only to have to eventually flee Austria as he was Jewish - but interestingly my grandfather and great uncle (his two sons) both buecame staunch communists in their 20’s once they had settled in Australia.
Is it possible that the communists in Russia helped them get home?

Hello everyone,
I am an Indian software developer from a reputable college with 1 year of professional experience and 1 year of internships. I have always wanted to explore different parts of the world, and as a part of this quest, I am considering living and working in Japan for some time. I've heard good things about the country from a few people (non Japanese) I know indirectly who are currently working there (also software guys).
I am aware that Japan is a hub for AI, robotics, and the entertainment sector (video games, anime, music, etc.). However, I have a couple of key questions that I'd love some insights on:

1. Should I consider living in Japan for a significant amount of time?
   • What are the pros and cons of living and working in Japan as a foreign software developer?
   • How welcoming is the culture to international professionals, especially from India?
2. What are some extraordinary niche companies working on innovative projects in Japan?
   • I am particularly interested in companies providing a healthy work culture and a largely multinational workforce.
   • I’d like to explore opportunities beyond the usual multinational corporations. Are there any standout companies in the AI/robotics or other cutting-edge tech sectors that you would recommend?

Thank you in advance for your advice and recommendations! Looking forward to hearing back.

🪞
Welcome back to the Asylum write-up, where we explore the decade-long slow-motion car crash that is the Emilie Autumn fandom.
Sorry this installment took so long to upload! Just a heads-up, I may take some time to deliver the last one too – these posts take forever to format on Reddit's finicky-ass editor, and my dumb real life is currently keeping me from precious Internet time. Thank you for your patience! You have my word that everyone who pre-ordered the final installment will receive a PERSONAL, HANDWRITTEN letter autographed and illustrated by me, a list of the snacks I consumed while composing this write-up, some exclusive behind-the-scenes secrets, and a pony.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 – Part 4.2 Part 5

Places, everyone This is a test Throw your stones Do your damage Your worst, and your best (...) And if I had a dollar For every time I repented the sin And commit the same crime I'd be sitting on top of the world today (“God Help Me”, 2006🎵)

Quick recap of where we left off. First, there were five to ten halcyon years of pleasant and meaningful interactions between EA and her blossoming fanbase, prominently by way of her official forum. Then, circa 2009-2010, EA's online presence shifted towards sudden anger outbursts, ban-hammering, and an increasingly top-down communication style.
This created a sort of primordial rift within the fanbase, between those who supported EA's right to speak her mind and regulate her own fan spaces however she pleased – and those who thought that her reactions were rude and inappropriate (at best), and that even fan spaces should allow for reasonable, non-abusive criticism of the artist.
Between a poorly-handled book release (see Part 3), the controversial (Part 2) or dubiously true (Part 4) contents of said book, and serious shade from various former collaborators (Part 5), more and more fans had pressing thoughts about EA's work ethic and choices. EA attempted damage control through drastic forum rules that made it virtually impossible to voice any “serious” critical opinion. It didn't work, of course: instead of squashing the mutiny, she created a schism.
Critical fans and active haters started congregating on unofficial platforms.

“WITH MUFFINS LIKE THIS, WHO NEEDS ENEMIES?”: TROLL LIKE A GIRL

So here we were, the early 2010s. The official forum (which had about 700 members in 2006, if you recall) was now thousands-strong, reaching just over 12,000 registered users in 2012 – not all of them active, but still. In terms of sheer numbers and content creation, the party was POPPIN'... but increasingly in parts of the Asylum that escaped EA's jurisdiction, such as Tumblr, where they could speak their mind freely.

You play the victim very well You've built your self-indulgent hell You wanted someone to understand you Well, be careful what you wish for, because I do (“I Know Where You Sleep”, 2006🎵)

In one wing of Asylum Tumblr, a smattering of call-out blogs emerged, which laid out EA's various lies, faux pas, shitty takes, and general deep-seated terribleness in detailed timelines and screenshots (or, short of that, long-winded bullet points). While many such blogs framed it as “serious” whistleblowing and did their best to remain as fact-based and neutral as they could, there was some genuine disgust, animosity and creepiness towards EA on that side of Tumblr; for some ex-fans, “exposing the truth” was mostly justify obsessive hatred, prying and verbal abuse. Some, for instance, felt the bizarre need to side with EA's mother in their estrangement. (One user, with the URL “emilyautumnfischkopf”, argued in a serious and down-to-earth tone - but with zero sources - that EA's upbringing had been nothing but peaceful and supportive until she ungratefully kicked her loving family to the curb for no reason at all. They were later revealed 🔍 to have an alternate handle as “eaisalyingcunt”.)
Either way, through these blogs, a number of potential drama bombs that had mostly flown under the radar were dredged up from over the years – some of which were hard to ignore, even for supportive fans. Where to begin?
There was that nonsense in-joke song, captured twice on camera during the 2009 tour (to very little outrage, at the time), crassly called “Manatee Retard”📺. Or EA's scathing response, in print, to a wheelchair user who found it insensitive that she used a bedazzled wheelchair as a prop to do sexy acrobatics on stage. (“Your offence taken at my hard-won self-acceptance proves that I indeed have something to fight against”, she wrote). Spoken word tracks where she made trivializing knock-knock jokes about serious mental illnesses she didn't have, like schizophrenia and OCD. Multiple instances of calling Britney Spears a “bimbo” and a “Hollywood fucked-up”, resentfully claiming that she only shaved her head because she was “hopped up on drugs” and certainly not because she was “bipolar”, a word the press liked to wield as an insult anyway. (“That's almost like calling someone a retard!” Yeah, heaven forbid.) The meanest, most distasteful paragraphs in the book. Basically everything problematic EA had ever said or written.📝 In retrospect, it had been a long time coming, but it was a lot to take in – and certainly more off-putting, even to less emotionally invested fans, than silly lies about her age and last name.
In another wing of Asylum Tumblr, some fans had had it up to here and just wanted to have fun. 🎵 If Plague Rats had learned one valuable lesson from EA, it was how to crack a joke in the face of absurd tragedy – and the general state of the EA fandom certainly warranted a few.
In 2012, Fight Like a Girl was released. After six long years, three of which had been peaceful, the Opheliac era was officially over. The new album and ensuing tour confirmed that the Asylum had entered a process of glamorous Broadway-style militarization. 🎵📺
The mood board was “Roman general meets Vegas showgirl meets Victorian street urchin”.🪞 The color palette was, to naysayers, “musty pink and rotten, stale piss yellow”. 🐀 The keyword was “REVENGE” (through the power of... self-expression! sorority! brutal assault with rusty medical implements!). The chorus of the title song had an intriguing run-on line about getting “revenge on the world, or at least 49% of the people in it” 🎵 – which seemed like an awful lot, and was widely interpreted (to cheers, boos, or uncomfortable sighs) as a misandrist jab at literally all men on Earth.
The show was essentially a demo version of the musical, in that the setlist vaguely reflected the order of events in the story – but prior reading was essential in order to get what the hell was going on on stage. This one Broadway reviewer had not perused the literature before seeing the show 🔍, and hated: the set, the choreography, the skits, the plot, the lyrics, the music, the concept. (Seriously, you should read the review. It's not even my show and I feel like quitting show business.)
Pre-show VIP encounters, now violin-free, were lorded over by EA's new manager🐀, whose official title was “Asylum Headmistress”. (Interesting choice – she sounds fun!) The swag bags were less substantial than before, and the “greet” part of the meet-and-greet was rarely more than a quick hug and photo op.
On Twitter, EA continued to embrace her “I am very badass” fronting attitude...

Often wonder if cyberbullies r aware they’re fucking w/ a girl who’s BFs w/ maker of the SAW films & is marrying a knife-throwing scorpion. (🐀📝)

...and her taste for needlessly inflammatory statements. About an aisle sign in a supermarket:

If this does not infuriate you, then you're a fucking potato.

(Again with the confounding crypto-ableism, EA! 🔍) She also went through a phase of raging against Lady Gaga 📝, who had stolen her idea of using a wheelchair on stage as an able-bodied woman. 🔍 That failed to convince anyone that she wasn't the histrionic diva that haters made her out to be.
Spurred on by EA's rallying cries and “us vs them” mentality, loyalists turned the white-knighting up to 11. On Twitter, some Plague Rats got into cat fights with Lady Gaga's Little Monsters (what a time to be alive). Others tried to balance out the Tumblr negativity with initiatives like “Spreading a Plague of Love” – a “positive-only” confession blog, whose extreme fangirling, comically drastic rules and hyper-defensive tone📝 did not debunk the increasingly popular notion that “true Plague Rats” were a bunch of authoritarian and hopelessly brainwashed fanatics.
EA truthers and other anti-fans started lashing out at anyone who dared express any positive opinion of EA, solidifying claims that the backlash against EA was just a conspiracy of bitter, hysterical bullies.
All this to say: every passing day brought new reasons for fans to get mad at EA and each other, and everyone in the Asylum was in need of a laugh. It's not easy having a good time.🦠
Leading up to Fight Like a Girl and in the years that followed, user-submission-based meme blogs took off, most notably “Spreading a Plague of Lulz / Troll Like a Girl”. A lot of the early submissions were absurdist humor and toothless, cheezburger-Impact memes (a style that was, oddly, already dated at the time). Those often originated in good fun, and from loyal fans, on the official forum. But there was also true snark, satirizing EA's questionable ethics, outrageous claims, and easily spoofed artistic gimmicks. A new slang of Asylumspeak emerged: Glittertits (slight NSFW), GAGA!!, EA Gusta and all its memeface variants, Get outta mah house!, Are You Suffering?, Fight Like A Goat, [Random celebrity] copied EA (a subgenre in its own right), ...
Most of the “trolling” was directed at unrepentant bootlickers and, to a lesser extent, red-in-the-face haters and creeps. Meme blogs would post joke comments under “serious” or gushing submissions on Wayward Victorian Confessions, and taunt loyalist accounts by tagging them in their posts. When a few people complained on WVC that almost all of the Bloody Crumpets to date had been thin white able-bodied women, and a few fans responded by sharing their dream-casts for a more diverse line-up, the blog was flooded for days with confessions that “X should be a Crumpet” (candidates included RuPaul, Mitt Romney, Nicki Minaj, EA's therapist, and the WVC admins). Farcical shenanigans like that.
Ah, but some people will always cross the line, won't they. EA threads popped up on merciless, bully-friendly snark platforms like Lolcow, Pretty Ugly Little Liar, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Snarkers with a mean streak and obsessive haters mingled in some of the more aggressive, 4-chan-spirited retaliation against EA – which would be called “brigading” in modern parlance. This included flooding EA's Goodreads page with one-star reviews (see part 4), repeatedly editing her Wikipedia page to include her legal name and birth year, and ensuring that Googling said name would bring up current pictures of her.
All of this compounded agitation fragmented the once-united fandom beyond recognition.🦠 Through substantial disagreements among fans, personal bickerings, layers upon layers of inscrutable in-jokes, and cross-platform telephone games, the Asylum morphed into a booby-trapped Escher room.
Satire blogs were taken in earnest. Earnest fan blogs scanned as satire. Memes would get called out as abuse. Appreciation without attached criticism would get mocked as bootlicking. Obvious jokes made by EA would be taken at face value. One divisive confession could trigger days and days of debate, to the point that WVC eventually banned confessions in response to other confessions. New waves of infighting created a confusing web of rival sub-factions🐀, each accusing the others of being toxic, cliquish, and delusional.
The shared fantasy was broken, the collective vision had crumbled, no onez was speaking the same language anymore. Fans would jump down the throat of other fans who held almost identical views about EA, except for that one thing she said or did that one time. Everyone had differing thoughts on what should or shouldn't acceptable to discuss, question, excuse, make fun of.
War is hell.

SCORCHED EARTH SHENANIGANS: HONEY, I SHRUNK THE ASYLUM

Would you tear my castle down Stone by stone And let the wind run through my windows Till there was nothing left But a battered rose? (“Castle Down”, 2003🎵)

Haters vs sycophants is not really the kind of conflict where one side can come out on top (if you're participating, you've already lost). But in the long tug-of-war between “grassroots” and “EA-sponsored” fan spaces, the ultimate winner is obvious – in that the former is gasping in agony, a shriveled husk of its former glory, while the latter... is non-existent. This is due in no small part to EA's tendency, like the Czars of old, to settle conflicts by setting Moscow on fire.🔍)
That's not entirely fair: unlike EA, the czar only did it that once.
By early 2013, as EA was gearing up for her third Fight Like a Girl tour at the end of the year, the official forum was... not as lively as it once had been. Not just because of the stifling rules and disgruntlement towards EA, or because EA herself hadn't really posted anything on there in years; the Internet was also changing, and forums in general were fast becoming passé.
This made it difficult for EA to create a safe space where she could talk to fans, and fans could talk to and about her, in a way she deemed suitable (ie, a space she could gate-keep and regulate enough to keep it completely free from negative criticism). Social media was a minefield; she still posted regularly, but didn't interact very much. So EA and the Headmistress came up with a way to filter out the unbelievers: an official fan club📝, aptly called the “Asylum Army”, with a $100 entry price.
Joining the AA came with a dog tag, a sew-on patch, and a lifetime membership certificate signed by EA and – for some reason – the Headmistress. (Unlike EA's best friend and sound engineer back in the forum's heyday, I don't think fans ever really embraced the FLAG-era manager as part of the Asylum in-group. She came across more as a coordinator / businessperson / adult chaperone, at best.🐀) So, slightly better goodies than you'd get by joining the other AA 🔍 ... but not by much. The main appeal was that members would have access to exclusive content, special merch, giveaways, early bird tickets for future shows, and regular video chats with EA.
The concept itself drew a fair amount of criticism, as you can imagine. Between the name🐀, the price, and the inherent gatekeeping of a pay-to-join fanclub, many balked at the monetizing of a concept that had once (like, three years back) been significantly more DIY, grassroots, and inclusive. 📝🐀
Then again, many also longed for a positive, drama-free space where fans could just be fans. And while the creation of the AA was generally recognized as a quick cashgrab, a lot of people were surprisingly cool with it. EA was trying to finance her dream musical, after all – although a number of fans wished she had gone about raising funds in a less sketchy way.
So around 400 fans shelled out (which, according to the Headmistress📝, “basically cover[ed] the cost of running the fanclub itself – keeping the database up, website, etc.”). Enough for a close-knit, but sizable community. But already, there was a conflict of interest: a high fanclub entry fee essentially demands that you pledge loyalty to the artist over loyalty to your fellow fans, who wish to join but can't afford to. Sharing, caring, and ensuring no one felt left out were some of the more positive values cultivated in the fandom... but leaking exclusive content would surely piss off other paying members🐀, and make EA feel betrayed all over again. (And she had barely just started to mellow out on social media!)
...But then again, this is the internet. After the first month of secret AA drops (lyric sheets, some photoshoot outtakes – nothing too juicy, really), there were, yes, some leaks. EA was predictably miffed, and retaliated by... ghosting the fanclub for weeks at a time in its first few months of existence (great look!). She eventually found the “solution” to her problem, by providing something you couldn't right-click-save (and which had been part of the promised perks to begin with): live interaction.
Over webcam, she was her usual in-person bubbly, charming, funny self. Everyone seemingly had a good time during the fanclub video chat, and this gave people faith and hope.
There were a few more events, giveaways, etc. As promised, ahead of the fall 2013 tour (the last one to date, it would turn out), AA members got priority access to show tickets and VIP bundles. The latter were much pricier than before, and only included soundcheck, a photo-op, and three goodies: a tin of loose-leaf tea, a signed printer-paper setlist, and a small flag that said “F.L.A.G.”.🔍 Some stuff continued to leak – but, as some of the outlaws pointed out (scroll down to the Disqus comments), they were mostly relaying information that was relevant to the entire fanbase, such as updates about ongoing projects (the dragged-out recording of the audiobook, for one).
In early 2014, lifetime memberships were closed, and replaced with monthly, quarterly and yearly subscription tiers. Bizarrely, you ended up paying $3 more per month if you bought a $99 yearly subscription📝 – but it did include the patch, dog tag, and piece of paper!

Sometimes I kind of want to be part of the cool kids and register to the Asylum Army. Then I remember how it came about, what you could get for the same price a couple years ago, how the whole thing was and is handled, and that I won’t support any of this bullshit. (And then I roll around naked in all the money I’m saving.) (🐀)

Still, a number of fans rejoiced at the affordable monthly option, and joined – if not for the exclusive content and merch (which were... okay, but not much to write home about), then for the friendly, drama-free exchanges with an artist they actually did love, in spite of all the frustration.
For the still-too-poor or still-undecided, there was always the forum! It wasn't as active as it used to be, but a few die-hards still managed to keep the lights on... until, inevitably, Someone Did Something and Ruined Everything. (Once again: EA's wrath is spectacular, but rarely completely unprovoked.) The incident features one notable figure in the Asylum community. Let's call him the Collector.
OK, so maybe you remember the meme I linked to in Part 4, with Christian Grey and the ginormous EA hoard. Well, that's the Collector's collection. The “Violin” promo that I called the "Holy Grail of the fandom" in the same paragraph? Also his. The handwritten lyrics that went for $940? Guess who won that auction. Over the years, the Collector had probably spent five figures on EA merch and shows, and although that fact was a little unsettling, he was a very active, easy-going, and generally well-liked fixture of the fandom.
One day in 2012, shortly after the Headmistress had replaced EA's old Chicago BFF as main forum admin, the Collector's account got banned or restricted over something dumb. When the ban wasn't lifted as quickly as he hoped, he took it... the way one takes things when one is unhealthily invested: he started spamming Headmistress and the mod team with increasingly rambling and abusive emails (lost to time, probably for the best). When that didn't work quickly enough, he tried a different route.
One of the many auctions that the Collector had won, some years prior, was EA's old iPod Touch📝 – which contained all of her favorite tunes and, buried somewhere in the data cache... a phone number. Which the Collector tried calling. And wouldn't you know it: EA picked up. She congratulated him on his sleuthing skills, listened patiently as he made his case, apologized for any distress caused by the unfair account restriction, and then they got married.
Kidding! She freaked the fuck out, hung up, and banned him for life from the forum and all EA shows and events.
After his ban, the Collector allegedly still tried to attend at least one VIP pre-show (one source in the comments says he was allowed to buy some merch, refunded for his ticket, and escorted out). He joined the Reform forum to bitch about EA and try to rally people to his cause, possibly made revenge posts about her on darker snark forums, and continued to hound the Asylum mod team. So in June 2014, EA came up with a radical and unexpected fix to the Collector problem.

The official Asylum Fan Forum has been shut down permanently. I have personally paid thousands of dollars each year to keep the forum safe and secure for you ... Unfortunately, the forum has not been kept safe and secure for me, a truth which disappoints me greatly, instead becoming a place where people who have physically threatened myself and my staff prey upon forum members, pressuring them to contact me and my staff on their behalf. If the gullible wish to humor my stalkers (who live in their parent’s basement at age 30 something) and thus put me in danger, they may do it on their own dime. They may also fuck off, because stupidity can kill, and I won’t be your victim. To those who enjoyed the forum, you know who to thank for its closure. (“On the closing of the Asylum Forum”)

Voilà! This is how a decade-long archive of shared history ends: not with a bang, but with a dirty delete and a sod-off communiqué.
The obliteration of the forum took everyone by surprise...

I was actually on the forum when it was taken down. I was navigating between posts and when I went to click on a different board, an error message came up. I honestly cried a little, I'm not ashamed to say. (WVC admin on Reddit, 2024)

...and I do mean everyone:

Chicago BFF / ex-admin, the next morning: Whoa, EA forum shut down? Ex-mod: It turns out that if someone spends enough years actively “waging war” to destroy what they can’t have, eventually they’ll be successful. * eye roll * Not even mods got prior warning. Just all the sudden, poof, gone. BFF: Really? She did not let the moderators know?! This is sounding worse and worse. Uggh. I’m so sorry. Such a loss. (...) Ok, threats are serious, but why not just put it in archive mode so no one can post? (...) Sad. I shall light a candle in the forum's honor. (Facebook posts; scroll down for screenshots)

It was a gut punch, especially for people who had poured countless hours into the community, or could have used some prior warning to save years of their own writing from the role-playing threads. One last chance to take a look around the place that had meant so much to so many.

From the wording of the announcement of closing the forum and a number of other things, it sometimes seems like EA doesn't like her fans much. :/ (🐀)

Three months after the forum was nuked, Battered Rose (a venerable EA fansite, which had been around since the Enchant era and had one of the most complete EA galleries online) announced that it was shutting down too.📝 The admin, who had also been a long-time forum mod, cited a lack of “time, energy, passion, or money” to keep the website going... and being upset at the sudden disappearance of the forum. It was, truly, the end of an era for the Asylum.
...Well, no point in living in the past. For those who could afford it, and still wanted to talk to/about EA after that (not everyone did 🐀), there was always the Asylum Army fanclub!
Over the summer of 2014, EA held regular live chats and Q&A's, and... many attendees really enjoyed them, and thought the AA was well worth the money after all. She also quietly parted ways with the much poo-pooed Headmistress around that time.

Just spent over 4 hours giggling, drinking tea and playing guessing games in chat with EA and other Asylum Army members ... No griping, no downers, just lots of fun. I think I like the way the ‘new fandom’ is going and now I’m really glad I finally decided to join the Army. (September 4, 2014🐀; Battered Rose had closed the day before)

The forum was lost forever, but perhaps that was a chance for a fresh start. Could this fanclub thing really be the Asylum Renaissance that fans had been longing for?

...I have come today to a very difficult but necessary decision, and that is to discontinue the Emilie Autumn Official Fanclub. The site itself, and the community chatroom, will remain open to you indefinitely, but I will no longer be making updates to the site. (Newsletter, September 8, 2014📝)

...Never mind, then.
Turns out the fanclub had been the Headmistress' idea all along. EA had been reluctant from the start, and although she really enjoyed the live chats with a safe community of people “who are there for the right reasons”, she couldn't overcome her fundamental discomfort with the concept. Lifetime and regular members would receive a bunch of digital downloads and a -35% coupon on the Asylum Emporium for their troubles. EA said she would definitely pop back once in a while for live chats, for free, just for fun, but to my knowledge, she never did.
And so the most devoted fans were left standing in the rain...

She is happy, she made it. She is fulfilling her dreams, found love and happiness after all the pain. I understand that she now doesn’t need “us” anymore ... That doesn’t change the fact she broke my heart with taking the Asylum Army and the forum from me. Yet, I am happy for her. (🐀)

...while naysayers pointed and laughed, Nelson-style.🦠

I don’t feel sorry at all for the people that paid for the Asylum Army fan club. Most of them knew that EA is an atrocious business woman and has broken many promises before. In fact, I laugh at them. They seriously thought that EA would actually stay consistent with this? (🐀)

EVERYTHING MUST GO: THE ASYLUM WHOLESALE

EA fans were left without an “official” home for about three years. This gave them plenty of time to be annoyed at EA for: not releasing the audiobook on time, not materializing any new project for a while... and the new sin of peddling random, ridiculously marked-up AliBaba jewelry as “merch” on her official store. Think faux-antique cameo pendants and $30 Big Ben rings (...because the Asylum story is set in London, get it?).

The whole accessories section looks like a tacky overpriced English souvenir shop. (🐀)

The fanbase lost a lost of steam in those in-between years, because there wasn't much to stick around for. As evidenced by the positive reception of the AA live chats, even in the midst of unresolved drama, out-loud interactions in a friendly environment have always been EA's saving grace. Considering the amount of online hate, there are shockingly few accounts of bad IRL encounters with EA: most people say that in live conversation, she comes across as a fun, warm, and genuinely sweet person. Some report that their negative opinion shifted after meeting her.
But there were no chats or live shows anymore. There was only social media, where she ignored questions and vague-posted about overdue projects – and the newsletter📝, which was all saccharine love-bombing to promote bland dropshipped trinkets. For fans who remembered the handcrafted merch (and two-way communication) of the early years, it was a bitter pill to swallow.

CONTINUED IN COMMENTS

​

I found something interesting on the tapes that were recently posted here in this post:
https://www.reddit.com/TheMysteriousSong/comments/1cllu3x/record_tape_found_mfjl/
There are two faded names on Gemischt_008 that read Paco Rosebud and Brown Jenkin. Searching these names brought up the Discogs for the following compliation: Schallkatalog Zur Ausstellung "Haben & Halten" - Woche Der Bildenden Kunst '86 Hamburg (1986, Vinyl) - Discogs I recall seeing a post that said the NDR DJs played songs from the local music college from time to time.
Interestingly this album appears to be a compilation of unknown / local bands from 1986. Obviously the wrong year for our search but interesting if the Paco Rosebud and Brown Jenkin recording was from NDR in 86 backing up the possibility TMS might be a local / student band.
A few questions:

• What are the names of the local music colleges which NDR played music from / potentially could have played music from? NDR are based in Hamburg and the compilation mentioned above is a full of local bands from Hamburg.
  
• What is the best way to search local records / albums from 84 which include compilations of local music / student music? Are there any keywords (German words) we can use to search on Discogs?
  

Hi! 👋
I need help and I also wanted to share a story or two, if that’s ok. So this is LOOONG. Please forgive any mistakes or wrong words
I’ve put the questions up top so feel free to ignore the rest. I just wanted to tell people about her.
Thank you so much in advance!
TL;DR
Part one: My beloved 98-yo Catholic grandmother in Sweden is dying, no other family member is Catholic. We don’t know what we need to do now before and after her passing.
Part two: Gran’s story and the Cardinal who Didn’t Forget.
——-
Part one
My Grandma is 98 and nearing the very end. She is a devout Catholic who converted in her 60s. No one else in the family is Catholic and there are very few Catholics in Sweden overall.
Her faith is incredibly important to her and I want to make sure she leaves the world properly from a religious standpoint.
Only I don’t know anything about it and I don’t know who to ask.
I would be so grateful for any guidance.
Questions:
1. Are there things we need to do for her from a religious perspective when the end comes? Last rituals?
Any special handling of the body?
Should we call a priest but who?

2. Swedish funerals usually don’t take place in three or four weeks after death. Is that okay?

3. Her service will be held in a Protestant church with a Protestant priest and buried in the family plot that’s there.
She has okayed this. She originally wanted to Catholic service in this particular church but it’s not allowed.
Are there any things (prayers, rituals etc) we can include to honor her faith?

4. Do I need to notify her local church? She is a member of the Secular Carmelites as well.

5a. Obituaries work a little differently in Sweden but I figured I’d ask. It’s common to include a little picture or symbol in them, everything from roses to sports team logos (yes, truly! 😂)
Most of the Catholic obituaries I see simply have a cross and . Is that the proper way to do it?

5b. Most obituaries include a quote.
Would this be appropriate?
”I am going towards you whom I have always sought, loved and always desired.”

It may sound odd I watched Sister Claire Crockett’s final vows and heard it and just knew instantly it should be in Gran’s obituary.
I haven’t been able to trace the source though.
THANK YOU! If you made it this far! —————————
Gran and the Cardinal
Now it’s story time!
Gran converted in her 60s “after a lifetime of searching” and was an eager theological correspondent.
She is a passionate fan of St John of the Cross and mysticism in general and is a member of the Secular Carmelites.
My Gran is Dutch, spent her first decade in Indonesia before coming back to Holland just in time for the German occupation.
She grew up Protestant but the war planted a seed in her mind and she set out to discover the spiritual world and learning as much as possible about every religion she could find, Taoism, Shinto, Hindu gurus, the works.
—
I asked her once what made her choose Catholicism in the end. She said that she had seen a small bookstore that interested her and unbeknownst was in a small, nondescript church.
Gran said she went in through the door and felt a “flash” or a rush or something she couldn’t quite describe and just knew. She spoke to a priest that very same day.
—-
Gran never quite lost hope that one of her children or grandchildren would convert (I was her best candidate but that has not happened. 😅)
—-
My grandmother had to stop going to Church maybe 10–15 years ago since hearing is so bad and it still grieves her.
She misses the community of the church, theological discourse, the connections she has made over the years. She felt lonely.
—
I don’t know how much the “regular Catholic” knows about different cardinals but we actually got a Swedish one, Anders Arborelius, a few years ago.
Gran knows him through the Carmelites and she has corresponded quite extensively with ”Bishop Anders”.
On one bleak day when Gran felt so along in the world, I tried to think of ways to cheer her up.
I did some googling and found an email address to the Cardinal himself and also to his secretary.
—
I wrote a long email asking of “Bishop Anders” would be willing to send her a card to remind her the church hasn’t forgotten her.
I didn’t expect an answer but later that same night, his secretary responded and it turned out she used to know my gran quite well.
The Cardinal was in Rome, she said, but he would probably look at the email when he got back.
That night (say 2AM), I got a response from the Cardinal about how well he remembers my Gran, and how much he likes and appreciates her.
A few day later, a lovely little letter with encouraging words and a blessing arrived in the mail.
One funny thing though! He had absolutely dreadful handwriting, so bad we actually send around a picture of it to family members asking them if they could decode it. 😂😂😂

I started dating my ex in 2020. During the pandemic, I had a bunch of free time cuz I met her online. We met in March, during my exams. Though it was my exams, talk a lot. We sparked in May and kinda of stated dating. We had on and off for 2 years until I went to college and I thought I will never meet her again, because our paths our different, our journeys will never be the same. So I thought I had to move on.
Even earlier, I thought I had to move on. I tried to break up so many times but we kept meeting again because of one thing or the other. I missed a lot. She knows the real me and I am glad that we met. She is the only one I could open up to in the time of need.
But the problem is, it's online. I know nothing about this sub or the intentions of the people around here but pls don't hate. I do realize it's online. So I always found it impractical to date someone online when you haven't even met once. We have different backgrounds. But trust me when I say she was awesome to talk to. I think she has a bright future ahead of her because she is really focused. The last time we talked was 6 months ago, and she had seemed move on. It was also because I felt I had nothing to talk about and the conversation died instantly. I unintentionally shut her down instantly even when she wanted to take interest. I realized it later, my bad
What do I do now to get her back? I really feel this could somewhere. It's been 4 years and I still feel it. Maybe I am delusional but I am 20 now. What is now is now here. My b'day was last month. I wanna be with her. It won't change or go away! How do I get her back?

21 and never dated anyone.
Literally it’s so bad. It’s not like I’ve had flings and nothings gotten serious. There’s been like literally close to zero signs of interest from anyone. I try to think back on the few crumbs of positive attention I’ve gotten to make myself feel better but in reality I know the truth and it’s pretty bleak.
I’m genuinely so embarrassed and humiliated. I can’t even take solace in having friends. EVERY group of people I meet, the conversation of sex/dating comes up and it’s pretty obvious I’m completely inexperienced. A few times I’ve lied, I’m horrible at it. Mostly I tell the truth and it goes pretty bad but I feel better about myself not lying. But it’s impossible to feel dignified amongst friends at this point. It’s a nightmare that’s never ended. I remember being in 8th grade getting shit from my buddies because no girls liked me and thinking it’ll all be over soon. I’ll grow up taller and handsome like my dad and more confident. And here I am. If people somehow get the idea I’m a misogynistic incel type I’ll be so mad cause at this point cause I hate men so much for the perpetual dick measuring contest that seemingly goes on in every male friend group. Also it’s so brutal every time I hang out and there’s girls around. Sex and dating is all people talk about.
My parents don’t understand at all. My mom was a pretty popular blonde and my dad was a football player who literally got scouted to do modeling a few times. They just give me the most basic moronically obvious advice ever. And at this point they seem really disappointed in me for not bringing a girl home yet.
I’m genuinely super fucking ugly even after doing a shit ton to work on it. I have perpetually horrible hair. I have a huge bulbous forehead, every friend I’ve had eventually comments on it. One plastic surgeon I consulted said it could be benign familial macrocephaly? Not that I could afford a procedure anyways. I try to cover it up with a fringe but my hair looks horrible. It’s super fine and straight and lacks any texture. My “midface” is sunken also: weak cheekbones. I was diagnosed with maxillary hypoplasia and maxillary vertical hypoplasia. Basically a midface (bones between upper teeth and eyes) that didn’t grow outwards nor downwards enough resulting in poor tooth show, weak bone structure, premature aged look, and a severe underbite. I had double jaw surgery covered by insurance. It was a marginal improvement at best. My underbite was fixed, my cheekbones remained sunken because the surgery doesn’t fix that unless you pay extra for implants that often look bad anyways, and my surgeon utterly failed to bring down my upper jaw enough to reveal my teeth. Since the surgery did fix the functional problems with my face (underbite) and only failed cosmetically, I’d have to pay full price out of pocket for a revision. I’ve also worked out a lot, never got super big but I have a small frame anyways, but I’ve been quite lean and in shape with visible abs. I’ve done a shit ton skincare wise and finally at a point with minimal acne but still shitty skin overall. I’ve also tried a bunch of hair styles and have decent style I think.
I’ve been quite social. I had a ton of friend groups in high school. In college my social life has died down because of my reduced confidence but I still try. I’ve join ed 4 different clubs. I talk to people in my classes and often make a group me for each class and arrange study groups. I use to go to bars until recently. Some guy called me an ugly motherfucker and started cackling and I went home drunk and started slicing my arm. Same thing happened after I was at a party and some girl at a party literally blurted ew when she asked my group of friends to introduce ourselves and it was my turn to speak. I had a good outfit on, my hair looked it’s best, all futile I guess. I just hate myself so much since I guess I must be so disgusting somehow. So I don’t go out much recently now, due to that among other bad experiences. I’ve done the apps with horrible results. I can’t say I blame people much. I don’t think I could be attracted to someone as ugly as me and I can’t help it.
It’s so embarrassing having family ask about my dating life and I have to make up some bullshit. I’m really at my limit. I know I’m neurotic but I’ve really done the work in tons of therapy and lifestyle changes. I don’t have a disease. I feel horrible because I haven’t felt dignified amongst my peers since middle school and I haven’t been remotely close to a fulfilling relationship. I just want someone to actually care and show an interest in me and ask about my day. Someone to watch movies with and cuddle.
My academic focus has been entirely premed. I’m nearing the end of college. When I inevitably get into a med school I don’t feel like I can actually go and have my parents pay for some of it feeling that I’ll be gone soon anyways. One time in HS I got humiliated so bad I drank liquor and took Xanax to end it only to pass out. I’ve been regretting my lack of commitment ever since. If I can pull through maybe I’ll do emergency medicine with the short residency, join Doctors Without Borders and get blown up in some war zone.

Six months ago I graduated as a Bachelor of Arts (BA)in the Netherlands. The study I did is quite a broad one, focussing on a lot of things marketing wise, from project managing to visual creation. Before this I did a 4 year sort of pre college study on multi media. During this whole period till now I have always had a fascination on film and have always been working on that. During the years of studying I created a freelance sidejob where I do video, from small jobs to big ones. The past couple of months I have been focussing more on the freelance life and it has been a fruitful one! I did some cool projects here and there and have some coming up.
Of course this sounds cool and great.
But I have the feeling and wish to do something big. Freelance is something I like, I love the part that I can be fully responsible for a project and sometimes partly. But I also think that working in a company would give me unique insights in how other people work. This is something I miss in my current state. Another wish is that I would love to work abroad. It is something that keeps me motivated, like an idea that will happen shortly or in a while.
I have been looking on websites and shown interest about this to others who might know more about this. And this gave me insights but not enough. So this is my question. Where does one seek information about working abroad (Italy, UK, Asia, US etc)? In a marketing/creative job and hopefully with a film twist to it haha.. thanks in advance!

I've been in love with this woman(X) since I was 14 or 15. I'm 26 now. Nearly 10 or 11 years later. We've been close friends on and off througout these years. On and off because I keep trying to cut ties(which I fail to keep cut because I just end up talking to her again). I did it once in high school when she got a boyfriend and then started talking to her again when they broke up, but I never had the balls to ask her out the rest of high school, and finally when it ended I tried cutting ties again before I left for uni(thought it'd be for good this time because we were going to different states, more than 10 hours away from each other). Things were going okay in uni, in my first year, and I found someone else(Y) that I liked, she had a boyfriend(long distance) so I wasn't hitting on her but l'm pretty sure she knew I liked her. We got really close in the first few months of uni, one day she asks me if i like her and I said yes, after which we stopped talking which really fucking hurt because I thought we were close friends. Right after that happened I started texting X again and it was like we never stopped talking. I got caught for weed at my dorm one night and while I was flipping out about being kicked out of the dorm and my parents finding out, she calls me up and one of the worst nights of my life turned out to be the best, and I guess that's when I realized I'm might still be in love with her. And I confirmed I was in love with her when one of our mutual friends told me that she told him that she liked me at some point in high school. But I didn't wanna admit it or tell her because I saw no point since we were 10 hours apart which just made me feel like absolute shit. Prior to college, till shit went south with Y, I'd never smoked(cigs or weed) or drank and was completely against it. One night I decided to get wasted(it was my first time getting drunk, and the last tbh for another 2 years) and since I didnt know any better I had 8 or 9 shots of whiskey back to back after which I got pretty fucked up and out of control and I ended up texting her admitting how I felt in I think a fucking 3 page essay to which I got no response which made me feel like absolute dogshit and I ended up crying the entire night at my friend's place. Next day I was still feeling like shit and I was at another friend's place smoking up and still crying about it to him and he just picks up my phone and calls her up and asks her to talk to me and she tells me she doesn't feel the same which broke me. After that conversation I just decided to just say fuck it, and fuck up my life, and I was just getting high on weed, alcohol or some other substance every day for the next 4 years. I barely attended uni, managed to get a year back. Pretty much wasted 5 years of my life just getting high or drunk. Anyways after that conversation with X, I stopped talking to her till I think my third year of uni. I met her once in twice in between, once when we were both back at our hometown, and once when she came to score some weed with her boyfriend (yeah I was also a dealer in uni). When I got into my 3rd year of uni, one day she hits me up outta nowhere and she said she's coming over to stay with me, and she stayed for like 2 days. I didnt make a move because I am a fucking dumbass, and I thought she just came there because we were friends. I call myself a dumbass because I do not understand signals from women. I'm also calling myself a dumbass because me and X ended up making out last year and she told me that she's wanted to do this for a while and when I asked her when she told me it whenever she came over to stay with me(which happened like 2 times). And the thing is, we made out after not talking to each other for nearly 3 years. After my uni I decided to completely cut ties with her because I knew that I was fucking up my life and one of the main reasons, there were plenty tbh, that were much worse than a girl not liking me but none of that mattered really because I honestly haven't cared about anything or anyone as much as I cared about her and I didnt know how to get her to like me. At the time I even thought it was all her fault(because it's definitely easier to blame someone else for the shit that goes wrong in your life than to admit that you're the fucking problem) and so one night I just sent her this huge message telling her to get the fuck out if my life and how she has ruined it and blocked her. After this I decided to quit smoking weed every day and isolated myself for a good 6 months(well not really by choice, I decided to move to my uncle's house during covid, and he wouldn't let me out because he was scared of getting infected). After the 6 months I went back to my hometown and I meet her the day after I landed(cuz we have mutual friends) and she asked me if i blocked her and I said yeah. We ended up meeting again a couple of times because we pretty much have the same friends, which didn't help me get over her so I just decided to cut out all my friends for like 2 years. And honestly speaking I got my shit together in those 2 years. Now I've never been someone with a lot of confidence my whole life. I've been an addict with no self control. Addicted to different substances, food, porn, cigarettes, just being an absolute waste man. Throughout high-school I was a fatass ugly fucker. I got attractive in uni cuz I smoked weed and lost a fuck ton of weight, I was attractive on the outside but a piece of shit on the inside(I knew it, but no one else really did)so getting attractive really didn't help my confidence a bit. In the last 2 years I finally got my shit together, got over almost all my addictions(smoking was my main, now it's porn, trying to get over it now) started going to the gym regularly and felt happy about myself, and I decided to start talking to my old friends and unblocked X because I finally realized it's not her fault that shit went wrong in my life, but my own which i didn't really admit to her cuz I had too much ego. I didn't even start talking to her, I just unblocked her and started following her socials. We ended up meeting because of our mutual friends, and the second time we met, we got super drunk, and we both started apologizing to each other. Later that night she made a move on me and we made out for a bit. Now I've hooked up with other people, but I've always felt like shit about it because it just never felt good. But I can't forget this fucking night, like it's etched in my fucking memory unlike most things because I have a shit memory. Honestly I forget most things that happen in my life except for moments i spend with her. Thing is I didn't wanna pursue it any further because I was leaving the country to pursue my passion (which didn't work out and I returned back home) and now I feel like it's too late to pursue it, because I don't think she's interested. I don't wanna tell her how I feel either because I've done this before and it's never worked out. I used to keep making excuses about being single to everyone by telling people that i don't have the opportunity to meet a lot of women after college(partially true), but now at my new job I meet plenty of women but I'm not interested in any of them because I know deep down I'm still in love with X. I don't think I can fall in love with anyone else and honestly I don't know what the fuck to do at this point. Worst part is life is going great at this point after being down in the dumps for so long. Got a decent job that I actually like going to, got great friends, have a lot of control over myself, but I still don't feel any happier because I'm not with her. Can't even tell this to anyone cuz our mutual friends think I'm over her, and don't know anything that happened between us. And my other friends just don't support me liking her so I just tell them I don't like her anymore.

I've been in love with this girl(X) since I was 14 or 15. I'm 26 now. Nearly 10 or 11 years later. We've been close friends on and off througout these years. On and off because I keep trying to cut ties(which I fail to keep cut because I just end up talking to her again). I did it once in high school when she got a boyfriend and then started talking to her again when they broke up, but I never had the balls to ask her out the rest of high school, and finally when it ended I tried cutting ties again before I left for uni(thought it'd be for good this time because we were going to different states, more than 10 hours away from each other). Things were going okay in uni, in my first year, and I found someone else(Y) that I liked, she had a boyfriend(long distance) so I wasn't hitting on her but l'm pretty sure she knew I liked her. We got really close in the first few months of uni, one day she asks me if i like her and I said yes, after which we stopped talking which really fucking hurt because I thought we were close friends. Right after that happened I started texting X again and it was like we never stopped talking. I got caught for weed at my dorm one night and while I was flipping out about being kicked out of the dorm and my parents finding out, she calls me up and one of the worst nights of my life turned out to be the best, and I guess that's when I realized I'm might still be in love with her. And I confirmed I was in love with her when one of our mutual friends told me that she told him that she liked me at some point in high school. But I didn't wanna admit it or tell her because I saw no point since we were 10 hours apart which just made me feel like absolute shit. Prior to college, till shit went south with Y, I'd never smoked(cigs or weed) or drank and was completely against it. One night I decided to get wasted(it was my first time getting drunk, and the last tbh for another 2 years) and since I didnt know any better I had 8 or 9 shots of whiskey back to back after which I got pretty fucked up and out of control and I ended up texting her admitting how I felt in I think a fucking 3 page essay to which I got no response which made me feel like absolute dogshit and I ended up crying the entire night at my friend's place. Next day I was still feeling like shit and I was at another friend's place smoking up and still crying about it to him and he just picks up my phone and calls her up and asks her to talk to me and she tells me she doesn't feel the same which broke me. After that conversation I just decided to just say fuck it, and fuck up my life, and I was just getting high on weed, alcohol or some other substance every day for the next 4 years. I barely attended uni, managed to get a year back. Pretty much wasted 5 years of my life just getting high or drunk. Anyways after that conversation with X, I stopped talking to her till I think my third year of uni. I met her once in twice in between, once when we were both back at our hometown, and once when she came to score some weed with her boyfriend (yeah I was also a dealer in uni). When I got into my 3rd year of uni, one day she hits me up outta nowhere and she said she's coming over to stay with me, and she stayed for like 2 days. I didnt make a move because I am a fucking dumbass, and I thought she just came there because we were friends. I call myself a dumbass because I do not understand signals from women. I'm also calling myself a dumbass because me and X ended up making out last year and she told me that she's wanted to do this for a while and when I asked her when she told me it whenever she came over to stay with me(which happened like 2 times). And the thing is, we made out after not talking to each other for nearly 3 years. After my uni I decided to completely cut ties with her because I knew that I was fucking up my life and one of the main reasons, there were plenty tbh, that were much worse than a girl not liking me but none of that mattered really because I honestly haven't cared about anything or anyone as much as I cared about her and I didnt know how to get her to like me. At the time I even thought it was all her fault(because it's definitely easier to blame someone else for the shit that goes wrong in your life than to admit that you're the fucking problem) and so one night I just sent her this huge message telling her to get the fuck out if my life and how she has ruined it and blocked her. After this I decided to quit smoking weed every day and isolated myself for a good 6 months(well not really by choice, I decided to move to my uncle's house during covid, and he wouldn't let me out because he was scared of getting infected). After the 6 months I went back to my hometown and I meet her the day after I landed(cuz we have mutual friends) and she asked me if i blocked her and I said yeah. We ended up meeting again a couple of times because we pretty much have the same friends, which didn't help me get over her so I just decided to cut out all my friends for like 2 years. And honestly speaking I got my shit together in those 2 years. Now I've never been someone with a lot of confidence my whole life. I've been an addict with no self control. Addicted to different substances, food, porn, cigarettes, just being an absolute waste man. Throughout high-school I was a fatass ugly fucker. I got attractive in uni cuz I smoked weed and lost a fuck ton of weight, I was attractive on the outside but a piece of shit on the inside(I knew it, but no one else really did)so getting attractive really didn't help my confidence a bit. In the last 2 years I finally got my shit together, got over almost all my addictions(smoking was my main, now it's porn, trying to get over it now) started going to the gym regularly and felt happy about myself, and I decided to start talking to my old friends and unblocked X because I finally realized it's not her fault that shit went wrong in my life, but my own which i didn't really admit to her cuz I had too much ego. I didn't even start talking to her, I just unblocked her and started following her socials. We ended up meeting because of our mutual friends, and the second time we met, we got super drunk, and we both started apologizing to each other. Later that night she made a move on me and we made out for a bit. Now I've hooked up with other people, but I've always felt like shit about it because it just never felt good. But I can't forget this fucking night, like it's etched in my fucking memory unlike most things because I have a shit memory. Honestly I forget most things that happen in my life except for moments i spend with her. Thing is I didn't wanna pursue it any further because I was leaving the country to pursue my passion (which didn't work out and I returned back home) and now I feel like it's too late to pursue it, because I don't think she's interested. I don't wanna tell her how I feel either because I've done this before and it's never worked out. I used to keep making excuses about being single to everyone by telling people that i don't have the opportunity to meet a lot of women after college(partially true), but now at my new job I meet plenty of women but I'm not interested in any of them because I know deep down I'm still in love with X. I don't think I can fall in love with anyone else and honestly I don't know what the fuck to do at this point. Worst part is life is going great at this point after being down in the dumps for so long. Got a decent job that I actually like going to, got great friends, have a lot of control over myself, but I still don't feel any happier because I'm not with her.

I made a post yesterday regarding whether I should go for a drop year and attempt clat or pursue economic honours from a private college. After a lot of consideration, talking to seniors I know and doing online research I have decided to take a gap year and appear for clat in December. I am taking a drop year for both my personal and academic interests. I am waiting for a few entrance results this week to get clarity on whether I want to go with it. In the meantime, I wanted to clear my doubts regarding gap year:

• Will it affect my future employment?
  
• How do you make the best use of it both mentally and academically?
  

Any advice regarding the gap year is welcomed and appreciated.
qualifications: 12th pass
stream: humanities with economics and maths

.. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆. . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆.
♡ hi hiiiiiiiiiiiiii ♡
I'm looking for a penpal that's down to mail each other those heavily decorated letters! I'm talking about those ins - ta - gr- am accounts and those p - in - te - re - st posts. I'd love to start one of those accounts myself actually!
I'm an artist myself and I'd love to share little pieces of art, share some stationary and share my love for decorations!
♡ Now a bit about me!

• I’m from Belgium! It's a small country in Europe, underneath the Netherlands and above france. It's the best place to visit most European countries haha.
• I LOVE MANGA (￣▽￣*)ゞ, I read tons and tons and tons. So I'd love to read one together so we can rate it etc or give you recommendations or be given some. I love the manga Attack on titan (plz no spoilers haha), Villains Are Destined to Die, My Life as an Internet Novel, I Was Reincarnated as the 7th Prince So I Can Take My Time Perfecting My Magical Ability and a LOT more haha. I've probably read more than a thousand different ones (not finishing them all but I know what's out there haha). I'd also love to send you character themed mail etc!!!
• I also love watching documentaries! I'm studying engineering as a first year college student and love watching science shows. I've probably watched every single one on netflix haha. I especially love documentaries about genetic modification etc.

♡ What I'm looking for in a penpal :)

• Someone that loves manga too! This one is very important too me, I don't have anyone irl that I can talk about this too, so I'd love some big manga nerds to rant too haha.
• Someone with a lot of passion! I wanna rant on for two or more pages about some random hobbies or some way too niche facts and I would love to listen too your way too niche interests too!
• Into art! Like I said, I wanna send those aesthetic pretty way too decorated letters with themes and goodies etc! The same effort would obviously be very much appreciated haha
• The same age range. Not below 17 but also not a lot older. I feel like that can make talking a lot easier haha

. . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆. . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

Hi fellow mates,
I'm wondering whether I should study for a master's degree to improve my qualifications. I have been an HPE teacher at a secondary school for about 5 years, mainly teaching Year 7. After that time, I feel like I am still on the wrong track in student leadership and I think you all know that students ignore this subject a lot. Recently, I am interested about a program in Leadership Education in Adolescent Health (the full name is The Baylor College of Medicine-Texas Medical Center Leadership Education in Adolescent Health) for adolescent and young adult health leaders through didactic, experiential, interdisciplinary education and training. and is based on research in the core health disciplines of medicine, nursing, nutrition, psychology, social work, and public health. I think there doesn't seem to be a program like this in Australia yet. I will put the link here for you: https://www.bcm.edu/departments/pediatrics/divisions-and-centers/adolescent-medicine-sports-medicine/education/leadership-education-in-adolescent-health-leah
I'm very curious and don't know if this program will help me. Therefore, I would like to ask for experience from testimonials if anyone is willing to study master leadership or a similar course.
What will motivate you to pursue a master, what information and topics are covered in that course, do you think it will be useful to you, and do you think in the future there will be more HPE teachers to study further in this field, and if so, how would they be interested?
Cheers!

i recall constantly being in intense screaming matches with my mother since my earliest memories. i’m not quite sure what we would argue about, but i felt like i could never do anything right. she would blow up all the time. i never knew when to expect it, but i was always a failure for something.
she wasn’t available emotionally. or maybe i just wasn’t able to talk to her. i don’t feel comfortable telling her anything about my life, if i think of anything one may typically share with a mom, i feel great shame thinking about speaking about it to her.
i didn’t really realize any of this affected me or was “trauma” until i did EMDR therapy this past year, and my therapist and i connected these memories to my body dysmorphia, ocd tendacies, anxiety, and overall constant and intense self hatred. i kind of just thought this was normal, or that i must really suck and deserve to dislike myself so badly.
after doing this reflecting, it’s hard to be back home for the summer (im back home visiting as a college student) and see her faults. to see her continuously fail to be there as a mother, or have any interest or care about me. throughout therapy and comparing my situation to my friends mother-daughter relationships, i always still felt that i am the spoiled brat my mom always told me i was, and that maybe my therapist was telling me what i would want to hear. but being back allows me to see that my memory isn’t skewed, my mother truly is an incapable mom and unfortunately overall human being.
it’s just frustrating knowing a lot of my mental health and self esteem issues can be attributed to lacking any loving parental figure. (dad died in an accident when i was 6) i always just thought of myself as hyper independent, i pushed away any emotions of not having a mom or dad. overall im a pretty emotionally numb person. but now i just wonder what life would be like if i had at least one loving parent.
i wish things were different. i think my mom wants to be a mom as she always talks about how proud she is of her kids. she likes to “show us off,” im not sure why as i feel my sister and i raised ourselves. but it seems my mom genuinely believes she’s a great mom. but she doesn’t know anything about me. i just don’t think she has the empathy or intelligence to know how a mom should care and support a child emotionally. it’s like something in her brain is missing, she’s not outwardly trying to be a horrible mother.
i’m so sad to be back home, and just really wish i had a mother to express my emotions to and receive love. however, my sadness is due to my mom, or lack thereof, so i can’t talk to her about it obviously, so it’s just an endless loop of sad and i’m not quite sure how to deal with it.

I am gonna start my studies this 2024 winter for BSc Physics program.
I have some questions if anyone of you studying at LMU or even TUM Can answer based on their experience
(1) How hard is coursework at LMU for Physics bachelors? do you get any free time
(2) my Maths and Physics from high school is good enough (got 2A* in Physics and Maths A level). but I know that uni physics degree is something else. what should i do beforehand to make sure I don't fall behind and score good grades
(3) how are the professors like, do they teach their course well or not?
(4) Are there any classes in English or not (I am at C1 level, but still would want to improve)
(5) how tough are the exams and what sort of prep u need to do. i am sure the exams don't come from. profs. script. it most likely comes from a whole big books only. what do you do to get top grades
(6) will it be hard to complete the bachelors in 6 semesters or if we plan good and study more. can we complete in 6 sems (or highly unlikely I know, even less than 6 sems)
(7) do you get student research jobs or not ( i believe they look good on CV and you get good letter of recommendation from your profs for master)
(8) do students who complete their Bachelors and then masters have chances for any good jobs or not?
(9) although my last question can make u think otherwise, i am mostly interested to go into Research field. so if any of you know, how good is the Masters of Theoretical and Mathematical Physics (TMP) program by TUM and LMU jointly for further PhD prospects or I would want to go to Cambridge's Part III masters or Oxford MMathPhys masters course (1 year). any suggestions for both if you can ( I can't afford the bachelors even if i got into Oxford or Cambridge)
(10) is it easy find friends as international (I am from India), so that we can make study groups with them (which is obviously good to have)
(11) I also have offer from TUM as well btw, so if anyone of studied at TUM, you can answer the questions based on that as well. also what would you recommend more? TUM or LMU (only bachelors for physics). state some reasons too
(12) How would you compare the bachelors here in LMU or TUM compared to other great places like Cambridge, Oxford, ETH, EPFL and Imperial College London. is the course here in Germany more or less rigorous than these other great institutions
if anyone of you want to/can share, then pls tell the books your profs use or u yourself use for studies for Physics bachelors. I can use those in free time to have a easy time when i eventually start my uni

Gentlemen,
I’ve had this idea of cloning a fresh, out-of-the box W11 system my laptop came pre installed with, and mounting it onto a complimentary ssd that I’ve put into a vacant, secondary disk slot of that same laptop, to run either system whenever needed.
——— This way I could: 1. Differentiate between my personal and work use of the machine, i.e. avoid bloating my work ready system with games and stuff, and avoid bloating my gaming system with industrial automation software and services that you cannot/shouldn’t un-autorun; 2. Roll my work ready system back anytime if the automation software breaks (which it tends to at the most critical times, making most people in the industry resort to the slower, but much more reliable idea of virtual machines); 3. Roll the work system back to a clone with a set of older version of the automation software if the project demands so. ———
So I’ve made a set of clones using Clonezilla already and they do work as intended — at least for some time. Until after several days of use, either one system or both of them boot into BSOD returning the error NTFS_FILE_SYSTEM, from where disk checks do not help, nor a Windows recovery drive does. The only thing that helps is mounting the saved clones again, afresh, but then the same problem reappears in several days of use. What I think the problem might be, is that the original system was cloned in its entirety, which includes the drive letter. Now each system regards to its respective physical disk as C upon boot, and to the other one as D — might this be the problem? Interestingly, DISKPART UNIQUEID actually does return different MBRs for both the physical drives, so I wouldn’t think mere volume letters would cause a fight to the de.th between the systems, but I ran out of ideas. Any suggestions?

Hey everyone,
I'm facing a significant issue. Despite applying to numerous internships and ensuring that I upload my CV and cover letter, both of which are supported with GitHub project links and my LinkedIn profile, I often receive no responses. When I do hear back, it's typically a rejection message like this: "Thank you for your interest in XCompany. We've reviewed your application and, unfortunately, we have decided not to move forward with your application at this time. We appreciate your time and will be sure to keep you updated regarding any future opportunities that may be a good fit."
I don't understand what the exact problem is. I make sure my CV passes the ATS checker and aligns with the job requirements. If internships are this competitive, what should I expect when applying for actual jobs?
P.S. A quick question: Do you apply with the same CV for each position (in my case, as a .NET developer), or do you customize it to match each job description?

Hi queen petty potato :), names used are fake. I am dyslexic so I apologise in advance.
I 26(female) and friend Lola 28(female) met because of a mutual Friend Kat 27(female) who I was in the sixth form college classes with at age 17, me and kat got pretty close but she was 18 so she could go out to clubs and bars on the weekend to which I could not yet.
I met Lola a few weeks after my 18th birthday as her birthday was pretty close to mine, Kat asked me if I wanted to go to Lola's birthday party, On first meeting Lola she was kind of cold didn't seem to interested in getting to know me, fast forward a few weeks and me and kat were going out a lot and Lola seem to warmed up to me, Kat did let me know Lola can take time to warm up to people But she did and everything seemed completely fine with us.
Now here's where I should of clocked why she is like this kat and Lola would tell me stories of them in secondary school that they were always falling out or there group of friends changed quite often due to people falling out with Lola, it was all because of boys Lola loved them and basically always wanted to be the centre of attention when boys were around, I had a boyfriend at the time so she basically didn't feel I was as a threat to her as the others (her words not mine).
Well I broke up with said boyfriend as we grow a part, the break up was a little hard as it was my first relationship but kat and Lola were really there for me, I did start to notice Lola would get snappy with me for what I would wear out at party's or clubs but I put it down to this guy Matt who was messing her about a bit and we would see him and his friends all the time, I did get attention from Matt's friends but I liked his friend Joe not Matt as he seemed like a bit of dickhead because how he would treat Lola.
Lola didn't like any of my other friends whom I had known longer as they were friends from my primary school or any new girls she would we meet and would get mad and start arguments with me and Kat when we were hanging out with other people, she got pregnant and would always complain we were always going out when she couldn't, and basically would call us bad friends and unknow calls us and anyone we were with stay silent on the phone to see if we were out as we would lie sometimes because we did want the arguments, she could be pretty selfish as I was not really local to her and would travel to her and she would make no effort to do the same.
This went on for years until I basically said to Lola I don't want to be to be friends it's exhausting and I'm to old going over the same argument, here is where I might be an asshole at this point no one was talking to her not even Kat, so basically I know she has no one at this point other then the latest guy in her life. she calls me and texts me daily saying I'm throwing 8 year friendship away.
Am I the asshole here or could I be more understanding of her feelings.

Hey! I am an international student Deaf low-income, first-generation college student, I could not afford the help of paid mentorships, but if any of you got accepted to top universities with full-ride scholarships could help me through the journey with your mentoring.
If you are interested in this opportunity, please contact me privately. I am willing to provide a detailed letter of self-introduction with my high school transcripts, and TOEFL transcripts SAT. My goal is to apply for a full scholarship to a top private university
I need someone with whom I can discuss and share my plans and ideas for this application cycle, need full counseling, and all subsequent communication can be done with pen and paper, I mainly need counseling on application strategy, school selection, main documents, supplementary documents List of activities
With one move to help me fulfill my MIT dream, I will give it my best shot, and through my hard work and your guidance, I will be able to realize my dream and open up a brand new future.

To start off I (18M)(On the spectrum) have zero clue how dating works, how to start talking to people, how to catch peoples interest, how to keep interest, or anything in that realm. This stuff is alien to me and it seems to normal to other people around me. I’m in college now, I have no friends, and am an introvert. I have no connections, I don’t drink/smoke/party (From the U.S.) and have no way of even socializing to even reach a point of at least a talking stage.
When I have been with people (Sexually) (I haven’t dated in 4 years), all of it feels so foreign, it feels weird and uncomfortable and feels like I’m putting on a show. It never feels weird, I just try to repeat what I see other people doing, then again that’s what most of my social experiences feel like really.
I’ve been on dating apps and they’re hopeless, had two dates and one hookup over the course of 9 months, so that is just not a good idea there. I’m out of options because soon my only source of social interaction will be strictly online.
I’m aware I’m an issue and my behavior such as how I talk, walk, text, or act are all strange. I text too much, I put in too much effort when I do get to talking, I’m so non busy that I have no reason to not respond type of stuff.
I dated a girl once in 9th grade for a few months if you can call it dating. That was by luck just because she just so happened to be as weird as me and doing that same stuff I was. High school is long over and so is my forced social interaction. I won’t be back to classes for a few months, so for the time being I really will be fucked.
I hear of people meeting their partners through friends, hobbies, bars, parties, online, jobs, etc. But none of those seem plausible to work for me. I have no physical hobbies, I have no friends, I’m unemployed, I can’t go to bars, I don’t party, and all of the above. And no I don’t want to do parties or drinking or any of that, I will live my life sober for personal reasons. Even with that, nobody has even made one attempt at random conversation with me at college since august.
People say I’m weird looking, call me too skinny, say I should work out, some will blatantly call me ugly. People usually don’t take a second glance at me, I am just the middest dude in my area ig.
I know my issue with this stuff is due to my Personality, Looks, and social manners, but I don’t know how to change that and I don’t want to have to change myself completely to just be have a companion. Couldn’t life just be a little more forgiving?
I just ask what the hell do I do here?