Wireless driveway monitor deluxe

Was forced to buy a new car and the excise tax bill came in, selling some tech to pay that bill but mostly cuz it's tech I'm not using.
Post here before PM. NO CHATS!
Timestamps Sorry they're just all thrown into 1 folder. I want to let everyone know these are posted on local facebook marketplace as well, so if something sells there I will update this post.
I am looking for trades, possibly the Apple Watch Ultra 2 and a NAS 8 bay or 4 bay with 10+ tb drives. (need at least 20tb to migrate my stuff over)
For now this is LOCAL ONLY, I am local to Malden 02148
Dan A4 H20 mITX Build. Asus B550-I Gaming Mobo, Ryzen 5900x, 64gb DDR4 3600 Memory, 2 TB nVME, EVGA 2080 Super, Lian Li 750w SFX PSU, and a 240 AIO Water Cooler. $700
SSUPD Meshilicious Build, Asus B450-I Gaming Mobo, Ryzen 3600, 16gb DDR4 3600 Memory, 512gb nVME, EVGA 2080 ti Founders, Corsair 650w SFX PSU and a 280 AIO Water Cooler. $500
Sony PS5 Disc Console with 2 controllers, charging dock and 2 games brand new, Final Fantasy Rebirth and Stellar Blade. (note on stellar blade, it's open but gamestop considers it new because it was their display copy so they put the stupid sticker on it, I haven't opened it so it's still sealed and considered new. I have receipts for both games.) $450
Transparent Green Analogue Pocket with Dock and 2 8bitdo Sega M30 2.4g Wireless controllers. (Have original boxes just not shown) $500
Retroid Pocket 3+ $100
Retroid Pocket 4 Pro with Carrying Case, Grip and Tempered Screen protector $200
Jailbroken PS4 on 9.00 Firmware comes with power, HDMI and 1 controller and I will supply the USB Drive for the exploit $250
M2 Mac Mini 8gb with USB Hub $450 (Pending Facebook pickup Wednesday)
2 Asus PG27UQ 27" 4k Monitors 144hz Refresh Rate with GSync. Willc some with HDMI and Display Port cables with it's OEM power brick. $275 EA
That is everything for now, I need to wipe both PC's and do a fresh install of Windows 11 Pro, the OOBE will need to be finished by you the buyer. Or you can wipe and install fresh, up to you.

Hey there!
Long time bass player and finally have the money to put down for some pedals and looking to build my first board.
I currently use an Acoustic B300 HD head to a Fender Bassman Pro 4x10 cab with a Shure GLXD 16+ wireless.
So far what I want to get for my setup is:
Voodoo Lab Pedal Power 2 Plus: https://www.sweetwater.com/store/detail/PedalPwr2Pls--voodoo-lab-pedal-power-2-plus-8-output-isolated-guitar-pedal-power-supply
Ernie Ball VP Jr Volume Pedal: https://www.sweetwater.com/store/detail/EB6180--ernie-ball-6180-vp-jr-250k-volume-pedal-for-passive-electronics
Dunlop MXR Bass Compressor M87: https://www.sweetwater.com/store/detail/BassComp--mxr-m87-bass-compressor-pedal
Electro-Harmonix Deluxe Bass Big Muff Pi: https://www.sweetwater.com/store/detail/BigMuffBassDlx--electro-harmonix-deluxe-bass-big-muff-pi-bass-fuzz-pedal
Tech 21 SansAmp Bass Driver: https://www.sweetwater.com/store/detail/BassDriverV2--tech-21-sansamp-bass-driver-di-v2
Any suggestions, or any feedback would be awesome! I was looking to later upgrade my stack but just want to see what my current setup would sound like with these behind it.

I have been waiting for a Mac mini build forever. Now I just bought the Samsung S9 viewfinity 27" 5k monitor which is the apple display cheaper alternative for macOs Retina.
Can you help me with necessary accessories/tips for building a Mac mini setup. I have: Samsung viewfinity S9 (thunderbolt 4) Corsair cherry mx keyboard (needs 2 usb slots) Kensington trackball wireless (needs 1 usb)
I want to keep using the keyboard and mouse. What Mac mini is compatible with my monitokeyboard mouse. What cables/accessories do I need? Any tips on what else I should know, account for?
Thanks

I know this has been asked many times, but I haven’t found a good solution for my issue. Hoping somebody will have some insights.
At home I would like to find a solution to switch my keyboard and mouse input between my gaming PC, my MacBook Air, and my work provided laptop. I’m thinking I’ll just connect the monitors directly to each device and switch inputs on there. I have no idea how I’ll do this with the MacBook with their 2 usb c limitation. The main issue though, is figuring out how to switch my keyboard mouse between the three devices without introducing input lag. For a mouse I have a wireless Logitech G Pro, and my keyboard is a Razer Huntsman Elite.
I was wondering if anybody has a similar setup and has had success getting it all working together nicely. Since the MacBook Air and work laptop will never be used in tandem I envision having a single laptop mount on my desk and doing some minor wire switching whenever I need to use one or the other. The gaming PC will never move.

I am considering upgrading my Macbook or getting a Mac Mini desktop. 2017 13 inch, two thunderbolts, 2.3 GHz i5, 8GB memory, 120 GB storage. most of the time my laptop is closed because I use a monitor, wireless keyboard, and a USB hub for my sound interface and speakers. should I consider an upgrade or stick with what I got?

ALIEXPRESS Deals Compilation (28.5.2024)!
Check products in compilation image: https://i.imgur.com/QwhwY0P.jpeg or https://i.ibb.co/r2tJ5R7/9036a5dcd080.jpg
-1- Smart PIR Motion Sensor Night Toilet Light
🌍 https://s.click.aliexpress.com/e/_De8vBD5
✌️ Price: 2.91 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-2- Charging Current Voltage Digital Monitor USB Tester
👉 https://s.click.aliexpress.com/e/_DCXEoJd
💰 Price: 3.11 USD / Lowest before: 3.39 USD
-3- Jianpai Adult Black White Classic Electric Toothbrush
🛒 https://www.aliexpress.com/item/1005006904470944.html
🥇 Price: 3.93 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-4- Flat Bottom Bathroom Home Slippers
✌️ https://s.click.aliexpress.com/e/_Dm0DESx
👌 Price: 4.35 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-5- Kids Swimming Floats
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👌 Price: 4.93 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-6- UTHAI 2.5-inch Hard Disk Box USB 3.1
✅ https://s.click.aliexpress.com/e/_DCq7zHV
🚨 Price: 4.93 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-7- KDEAM Eye-catching Polarized Sunglasses
❇️ https://s.click.aliexpress.com/e/_DekLUL5
⭕️ Price: 7.03 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-8- 1MORE FIT SE Open EarBuds S30 Bluetooth 5.3
✅ https://www.aliexpress.com/item/1005006904114660.html
🔹 Price: 27.93 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-9- 1MORE SonoFlow SE Active Noise Cancelling Wireless Headphones
🌍 https://www.aliexpress.com/item/1005006997622259.html
💥 Price: 33.38 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-10- 36mm Military Diver Mechanical Watch NH35 Sapphire Green
✌️ https://www.aliexpress.com/item/1005006994692172.html
✌️ Price: 47.47 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
-11- ILIFE W90 Wireless Wet Dry Washing Mop [EU]
❗️ https://s.click.aliexpress.com/e/_DDOhe4n
🥇 Price: 155.85 USD / Lowest before: -1 USD
🏆 Coupon: Paste $35,63/167 coupon "T10SW90" in the cart
Products compilation image: https://i.imgur.com/QwhwY0P.jpeg or https://i.ibb.co/r2tJ5R7/9036a5dcd080.jpg

I tried searching google and reddit for this exact sceario and I'm surprised to say I couldn't find anything that helped. I am currently using Eero Pro 2nd generations as a mesh network and it's working mostly fine. All the nodes placed around the house have a wired backhaul. I'm looking for more features like wireguard, traffic monitoring, and overall more options since those are pretty limited with Eeros OS.
I have an older Asus RT-ACRH13 laying around that I flashed with OpenWrt and had it somewhat working except for getting it to recognize the Eero nodes in the list of devices. I can see the 2.4 and 5Ghz bands from the built-in radios on the Asus router and can get those working but I'm not having any luck with the Eero's. I set the Eeros into Bridge Mode but that didn't do anything so I'm assuming there's more to it than that. My main question is, how can I use the Asus router to do the routing and then use my Eero's as the access points?
Ideally my network would look like this:
ISP Modem Asus Router Unmanaged switch 4 Eero Pro 2nd gens (and a mix of hardwired and wireless devices like pc's and phones)
Thanks!

Hey All,
Need your input on a situation I have with a business. I was hired to help the company initially become CMMC compliant. Upon doing my research I realize the business is missing key devices and protocols. The first issue is making sure the office is secure. The second is monitoring and giving least privileges to the remote access users and then monitoring and logging access. I will try my best to explain the current architecture and what I want to propose.
Current infrastructure:
First off, they are a small business approx. 80 users most of which are outside the US. These users use a third-party remote access application the company bought to log in.
Some have laptops sent by the organization. Others use their own laptops and there is no on prem or cloud-based AD solution for authentication.
In the office itself, we get internet access through our ISP. From our ISP we have a router connected (which is discontinued but we can still use it) with a firewall built in.
From that router they have the wireless AP and two passive switches connected, also the router connects to a patch panel that feeds ethernet ports in the office.
They also have a Synology DS920+ and a high-powered Desktop connected to one passive switch, and multiple high-powered desktops connected to the second switch.
They use Microsoft 365 Standard to carry out the day to day operations so it is still configurable, but it is basic.
My proposal
Get a firewall device for the office. It would be connected between the ISP device and the router to provide extra security.
Since they use Microsoft 365 my recommendation is to move up to Microsoft 365 Business Premium. With this they will have the following:
Microsoft Entra ID for authentication and user monitoring, Microsoft Intune, Exchange that would have more security, Microsoft purview and Microsoft Defender.
I am also going to propose Microsoft Sentinel to pull all logs into one location, but they may think it is too expensive.
What are your thoughts? I am going to go back to IT to talk more about what they currently have configured. One thing that confuses me is Entra ID. From what I have research it is not really Active Directory services but a connector correct?

This is going to be a very long post. To give some context:
I (20m and homeschooled) live with my three younger siblings and our parents. I'm a full-time college student taking all my classes online (so fun), and I'm projected to graduate Fall 2025 with a bachelor's in business administration. My mother (the bread winner) works essentially 24/7 at some investment bank making 6 figures, and my dad is obsessed with renovating old houses and real estate and "homeschools" the kids (all he really does is slap some videos up on the computers and lets us handle our own educations :/)
My parents have a "family vision" for my mom to quit her job and all of us working together flipping house and doing all kinds of stuff in the real estate market so we can all retire early and do whatever entrepreneurial endeavors our hearts desire.
Sounds fine-ish. But it isn't. It's literally a prison, and I'm tired of it.
My mother and father are the textbook definition of helicopter parents. We stay home 90% of the time, with most of my "going out" being our trips to restaurants, grocery stores, and Lowes. I have one friend I sometimes see once a month, but the rest are all online. Our schedule is hectic and we're always making trips, which makes it almost impossible for me to go to see people, go to church regularly, or hold down a regular job.
All of us "kids" (20m 19m, 16f, and 14f) are also being constantly monitored. They have Alexa's in almost every room and out of sight so it's impossible to tell if they're silently listening in (which has happened at least once, to my knowledge). They've installed Family Link on all our phones and can disable any of our devices at will for any reason. He can access my google account and see any and all emails and texts I send out (which he has actually done, several times), meaning that I can't say anything too incriminating to others without him knowing. They also has some sort of IP or Web blocking app that can tell him who's on what website and can block anyone on the home's WIFI network from accessing certain sites. He's deleted all web Browers except for Microsoft Edge off our computers so we can't use incognito or make guest accounts on Google Chrome either. The only reason I'm able to sometimes access the internet is through my cell data or running to the library like I'm doing right now, but my cell data is limited, and he can still see what apps I use on my phone, hence the library.
My parents are also extremely narcissistic, aggressive, and petty, but my father is the worst. He wants me and my brother (who is socially and mentally challenged) to work with him to renovate homes, but his constant bullying, picking, angry outbursts, and yelling at us (but especially my brother) has driven me insane. I have no desire to work on homes. I absolutely hate it, not because of the physical labor (though I'm not too fond of it), but simply working with my dad in such a toxic environment has tried every ounce of patience I have. He ridicules me and calls me "Low-T" if I say no to anything he wants me to do and loves to make mountains out of mole hills by taking away our privileges or launching into long lectures or "discussion" where he talks at us for over an hour.
Finally, I just had enough. At one of our family meetings, I brought up how I felt we were all overly coddled, and that now it has severely affected me mentally. I actively avoid confrontation and am extremely unmotivated to do anything as a result of feeling trapped by an unstoppable force, which has led me to become very depressed and antisocial. I also feel very codependent and unable to function as an adult. I have no driver's license and have never had a real job either as a result of this. I said I hated working on the house and went out of my way to avoid it at times, and that my father was a bully for the way he treated all of us every day. He'd throw things on the floor when he was pissed and yells all the time, but he thinks that's fine. They think they're perfect, but they're not. About a month ago my sister actually called the police for a domestic disturbance when my parents had too much to drink and got into a huge fight (whether it was physical or not, I still don't know). Of course, they tried to gaslight us into thinking that the amount of wine they drank (2 and half bottles between the two of them) was not enough to make them drunk, and that we were in the wrong for bring the police into it and for thinking that our Dad would actually attack our mother.
I told them that while they pulled my brother out of kindergarten so he wouldn't be bullied for being mentally challenged, they themselves ended up becoming the bullies in his life by treating him like crap every day, to the point where I think I will have to take care of him for the rest of my life, due to the damage that they've done to him.
Obviously, they went ballistic.
I've never been called so many names in my life. They said I was acting like "the children of Israel trying to go back to Egypt" that I was immature, selfish, self-righteous, disrespectful, and an ass. I didn't say anything back so I wouldn't make stuff worse and pretty much disappeared to my room (which I share with my three other siblings). I didn't talk to them for three whole days after that, until yesterday when they finally decided to grace me with their presence.
My parents said that they were going to give me what I want, and that they were going to remove all their "goodness" from my life.
What this meant was that I was expected to find a job and a car within the next two weeks, and that I needed to pay for my own car insurance and take care of my own transportation since they wouldn't be helping me. They also wanted me to get my own laptop to do my school on (which I think they will probably monitor, since it uses their wifi). They would not charge me rent to live with them, and they would provide food for me when they were in town. They also said they still had health insurance on me, but they made it clear that at the moment they wanted to keep their contact with me to a minimum for the time being while I was living with them, and that when they were out of town or when I was at work, I was on my own.
So now I come to you, people of reddit. What do I do?
I have $5K in cash I can spend. No debt (never owned a credit card). I don't have a license, but they still want me to buy a car and get it insured, even if it rots in the driveway until I can get a license (which they said they wouldn't help me with getting, and that I would have to pay for my own lessons and fees). They also said something about Title fees that I've never heard of before. I don't feel like I should push them on letting me just not get the car and bike to work instead, since they said, "If you show your ass again, you're paying rent." This limits where I can work and what I can do a lot, I know. But I live in a small town, and there's some grocery stores (A Food Lion & Kroger), some fast-food places (Pizza Hut, Wendy's, and other common ones), and some other stores within walking/biking distance and hiring. I have a resume that I needed to make to get into business school, but I've pretty much never worked for another person outside of my dad for my entire life.
I probably need a part time job, since I still am doing college full-time until Fall 2025. I've found a few cheap cars under $4k, and to insure them would be around $170-$210 a month. Keep in mind I also need money for a laptop, and some money left over to cover food at some point. I don't have any subscriptions monthly fees to anything at the moment. I also don't have a bank or credit account/credit score, so I probably will need those.
As for my relationship with my parents, I don't want to go back to working for them, but I still want to repair our relationship despite them saying "time won't heal it" and that "You ruined our plans for the future." I feel like even if I did go back to them, I would be under their thumb for the rest of my life. I still love them and want to have a relationship with them, but at the same time I want to be independent and LIVE gosh darn it, and until we have some boundaries, or they have a major personality change, I don't see that happening.
Due to the internet restrictions, I probably won't be able to check up on this sub till I can sneak away to the library again, but when I do, I will try to comment and reply. Thanks in advance

This is going to be a very long post. To give some context:
I (20m and homeschooled) live with my three younger siblings and our parents. I'm a full-time college student taking all my classes online (so fun), and I'm projected to graduate Fall 2025 with a bachelor's in business administration. My mother (the bread winner) works essentially 24/7 at some investment bank making 6 figures, and my dad is obsessed with renovating old houses and real estate and "homeschools" the kids (all he really does is slap some videos up on the computers and lets us handle our own educations :/)
My parents have a "family vision" for my mom to quit her job and all of us working together flipping house and doing all kinds of stuff in the real estate market so we can all retire early and do whatever entrepreneurial endeavors our hearts desire.
Sounds fine-ish. But it isn't. It's literally a prison, and I'm tired of it.
My mother and father are the textbook definition of helicopter parents. We stay home 90% of the time, with most of my "going out" being our trips to restaurants, grocery stores, and Lowes. I have one friend I sometimes see once a month, but the rest are all online. Our schedule is hectic and we're always making trips, which makes it almost impossible for me to go to see people, go to church regularly, or hold down a regular job.
All of us "kids" (20m 19m, 16f, and 14f) are also being constantly monitored. They have Alexa's in almost every room and out of sight so it's impossible to tell if they're silently listening in (which has happened at least once, to my knowledge). They've installed Family Link on all our phones and can disable any of our devices at will for any reason. He can access my google account and see any and all emails and texts I send out (which he has actually done, several times), meaning that I can't say anything too incriminating to others without him knowing. They also has some sort of IP or Web blocking app that can tell him who's on what website and can block anyone on the home's WIFI network from accessing certain sites. He's deleted all web Browers except for Microsoft Edge off our computers so we can't use incognito or make guest accounts on Google Chrome either. The only reason I'm able to sometimes access the internet is through my cell data or running to the library like I'm doing right now, but my cell data is limited, and he can still see what apps I use on my phone, hence the library.
My parents are also extremely narcissistic, aggressive, and petty, but my father is the worst. He wants me and my brother (who is socially and mentally challenged) to work with him to renovate homes, but his constant bullying, picking, angry outbursts, and yelling at us (but especially my brother) has driven me insane. I have no desire to work on homes. I absolutely hate it, not because of the physical labor (though I'm not too fond of it), but simply working with my dad in such a toxic environment has tried every ounce of patience I have. He ridicules me and calls me "Low-T" if I say no to anything he wants me to do and loves to make mountains out of mole hills by taking away our privileges or launching into long lectures or "discussion" where he talks at us for over an hour.
Finally, I just had enough. At one of our family meetings, I brought up how I felt we were all overly coddled, and that now it has severely affected me mentally. I actively avoid confrontation and am extremely unmotivated to do anything as a result of feeling trapped by an unstoppable force, which has led me to become very depressed and antisocial. I also feel very codependent and unable to function as an adult. I have no driver's license and have never had a real job either as a result of this. I said I hated working on the house and went out of my way to avoid it at times, and that my father was a bully for the way he treated all of us every day. He'd throw things on the floor when he was pissed and yells all the time, but he thinks that's fine. They think they're perfect, but they're not. About a month ago my sister actually called the police for a domestic disturbance when my parents had too much to drink and got into a huge fight (whether it was physical or not, I still don't know). Of course, they tried to gaslight us into thinking that the amount of wine they drank (2 and half bottles between the two of them) was not enough to make them drunk, and that we were in the wrong for bring the police into it and for thinking that our Dad would actually attack our mother.
I told them that while they pulled my brother out of kindergarten so he wouldn't be bullied for being mentally challenged, they themselves ended up becoming the bullies in his life by treating him like crap every day, to the point where I think I will have to take care of him for the rest of my life, due to the damage that they've done to him.
Obviously, they went ballistic.
I've never been called so many names in my life. They said I was acting like "the children of Israel trying to go back to Egypt" that I was immature, selfish, self-righteous, disrespectful, and an ass. I didn't say anything back so I wouldn't make stuff worse and pretty much disappeared to my room (which I share with my three other siblings). I didn't talk to them for three whole days after that, until yesterday when they finally decided to grace me with their presence.
My parents said that they were going to give me what I want, and that they were going to remove all their "goodness" from my life.
What this meant was that I was expected to find a job and a car within the next two weeks, and that I needed to pay for my own car insurance and take care of my own transportation since they wouldn't be helping me. They also wanted me to get my own laptop to do my school on (which I think they will probably monitor, since it uses their wifi). They would not charge me rent to live with them, and they would provide food for me when they were in town. They also said they still had health insurance on me, but they made it clear that at the moment they wanted to keep their contact with me to a minimum for the time being while I was living with them, and that when they were out of town or when I was at work, I was on my own.
So now I come to you, people of reddit. What do I do?
I have $5K in cash I can spend. No debt (never owned a credit card). I don't have a license, but they still want me to buy a car and get it insured, even if it rots in the driveway until I can get a license (which they said they wouldn't help me with getting, and that I would have to pay for my own lessons and fees). They also said something about Title fees that I've never heard of before. I don't feel like I should push them on letting me just not get the car and bike to work instead, since they said, "If you show your ass again, you're paying rent." This limits where I can work and what I can do a lot, I know. But I live in a small town, and there's some grocery stores (A Food Lion & Kroger), some fast-food places (Pizza Hut, Wendy's, and other common ones), and some other stores within walking/biking distance and hiring. I have a resume that I needed to make to get into business school, but I've pretty much never worked for another person outside of my dad for my entire life.
I probably need a part time job, since I still am doing college full-time until Fall 2025. I've found a few cheap cars under $4k, and to insure them would be around $170-$210 a month. Keep in mind I also need money for a laptop, and some money left over to cover food at some point. I don't have any subscriptions monthly fees to anything at the moment. I also don't have a bank or credit account/credit score, so I probably will need those.
As for my relationship with my parents, I don't want to go back to working for them, but I still want to repair our relationship despite them saying "time won't heal it" and that "You ruined our plans for the future." I feel like even if I did go back to them, I would be under their thumb for the rest of my life. I still love them and want to have a relationship with them, but at the same time I want to be independent and LIVE gosh darn it, and until we have some boundaries, or they have a major personality change, I don't see that happening.
Due to the internet restrictions, I probably won't be able to check up on this sub till I can sneak away to the library again, but when I do, I will try to comment and reply. Thanks in advance

I know I asked similar recently so apologies for starting a new thread but is a slightly different query. I run a 57" super ultra-wide monitor with an R1000 curve and sit around 650mm away from it so quite close without being in my face.
I currently have the clutch paddles on my wheel mapped to look left / look right to check for adjacent vehicles (use Crew Chief + spotter LEDs too) but thinking of getting something like the DelanClip which has great reviews, is not too expensive, wireless, lightweight and currently has a discount code too.
My question is will this have the same width of vision as the default ACC left / right actions do? Because they swing a long way around in either direction and I can't visualise a head tracker having the same degree of movement hence the question.
Before someone mentions it I would love triple screens but not happening any time soon and I have tried VR (have a Quest 3) but, good though it is, I can't be messing about with that all the time.

So I've got my steam deck hooked to a 2k HDR monitor over my bed, with Bluetooth mouse and keyboard. Should I focus on resolution or texture quality? If I have a high resolution I don't need AA as much... I can't think straight the propofol is still hitting me hard lol.
Anyway any suggestions appreciated... Also what other peripheral should I gift myself for surviving this completely stuck kidney stone? They couldn't even laser it apart had to pull it out whole, so sore! I deserve something.... Maybe a WIFI6e extender so I can get 2ms wireless latency instead of 35ms+ on old WIFI6 or wifi5 routers to my main beast of a computer and just stream from there via Moonlight? Stupid extender is twice the price of the router I bought. :-( Didn't realize 6e was such short range. :-(
Bah sorry stupid drugs make me babble...

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Content warning for suicide.
I should have known better than to expect uninterrupted sleep. I was awakened at some point in the early morning, before the sun came up, by a tapping against my window. I opened my eyes to find that the lights I had made sure to leave on the night before were all now off. Flipping the switch on the bedside lamp did nothing. The tapping came again, and I turned to look.
The blinds began to roll up by themselves, slowly, revealing a view of the parking lot illuminated by the bright moon. Creeping down from the top of the windows, I caught sight of a pair of feet dangling into view. Then legs, arms, a torso, all descending like a puppet on strings and clothed in ripped, blood-stained nightclothes. Finally, the face came into view, and I shuddered with recognition.
It was me.
The neck was bent at an impossible angle, long greasy hair cascaded over sunken eyes and lips curled into a pained almost-smile, but it was me. I realized with horror what lookatme.png had been depicting when I noticed the noose around the corpse’s neck.
One of the arms began to move, pressing a lifeless finger against the glass of the motel window and scrawling a series of letters in dark, dead blood.
F I R S T K I S S
When the corpse was finished, the arm dangled lifelessly against its sides once more, and it turned around to face the moon. It seemed to float out into the parking lot, the hanging rope carrying it along as it slowly gained altitude, ascending further and further upwards into the dark sky. The blinds began to move again of their own accord, covering up the window like curtains at the end of a play.
Despite everything I had been through, despite the horrifying dullness I felt in my heart from days of constant lack of safety, I still had enough energy left to cry.
The thing’s instructions were simple enough to follow. I knew where I had received my first kiss.
I arrived at the zoo as soon as it opened, hoodie up over my head in an attempt to obscure as much of my sleep deprived, dead-eyed face as possible. I didn’t bother stopping to look at any of the exhibits, instead making a bee-line for the reptile house. I hadn’t visited it in a long time, it brought back bad memories of a relationship that had already begun to curdle at the time of that long-ago visit.
My prompt arrival at the zoo’s opening, combined with the fact that it was a weekday, meant that for the time being I was the only visitor in the building. I walked past the chuckwallas, the tortoises, the gila monsters, the rattlesnakes, the horned toads, a veritable parade of cold-blooded beasts, ignoring them all until I arrived at my destination; the anaconda.
It just sat there, as it always did, an albino serpent the length of a truck, just lazing about in the moist, green habitat that was its whole world. I doubt it even registered my presence in the room. I sat down on a bench and waited to see what would happen next. It didn’t take very long.
After a few minutes, someone else walked into the room. I didn’t even need to look up to know who it was, or, rather who it was pretending to be. Even in my peripheral vision, I could recognize myself.
“Hello Thomas” it said, its voice a perfect mimicry of my own.
“That’s not my name.”
It cackled, mockery dripping from its voice as its laughter reverberated through the dark room. I just sat there and waited for it to finish. I was too tired to be afraid anymore. Part of me hoped that it had brought me there to kill me.
“What do you want?” I asked.
“Look at me.”
“I already have.”
“Look at me.”
I did as I was told, raising my eyes to look at the thing that had systematically worked to destroy my will to live. Its face was pale, its eyes dull, with lips a dull blue. The ends of its twisted not-smile twitched slightly as I made eye contact.
“Why are you doing this?” I asked.
It didn’t respond, it just kept looking at me with its dead, glassy eyes.
“What do you want from me?”
The thing reached a stiff, dead hand into its pocket, producing a scuffed and ancient flash drive.
“Pass it on. Make someone else look at me,” it said, tossing the flash drive to the ground with a clatter of plastic on concrete.
“No.”
In a flash, it was on top of me, hands tight around my throat. I struggled to breath, and frantically tried to push off my doppelganger’s stiff, cold body, but to no avail.
“It is very different,” it said, “to think you want to die, and to actually want to die. If you really wanted me to kill you, you wouldn’t be here right now, you would have done it to yourself already, you disgusting coward. You wouldn’t try to fight back as you feel your own hands close around your neck, you wouldn’t even try to take another breath. But you don’t really want to die. You just want to stop suffering. That’s not the same thing. And until you do choose to die, I can make you suffer, much, much worse than this.”
It let go, abruptly, and I fell to the ground in a heap, shaking and coughing. The shot of adrenaline from my body’s latent desire to stay alive provided me with just enough emotional energy to feel very, very afraid. The thing picked the flash drive up off the ground and placed it firmly in the palm of my hand. I winced at its touch.
“Make someone else look at me,” it said, and walked away, melting into the shadows of the dimly lit room.
And that brings us to the here and now. I’m sitting at my computer now, staring at this word document and trying very hard not to pay attention to the reflection I can see in my monitor, at the figure standing right behind me.
I’ve been writing this all out in one sitting, so I apologize if it isn’t particularly coherent, Helen, but I know you’ll understand. I trust you will have done as I instructed, and hopefully by the time you’re actually reading this, it has been several days after I wrote it.
Right now, in another window, I have an email draft open. I’m using a temporary account, one of those “self-destructing” addresses that will delete in about an hour. I imagine I don’t have to tell you what the email’s title is, nor the name of its sole attachment.
I haven’t set a recipient yet. When I first started writing this all out, I thought for sure I’d just send it to Seth, set the title to something like “Here is a check for how much I owe you” or something like that. But no matter how much they hurt me, I can’t bring myself to do this to them. Even if it is their fault that this is happening to me. I think I’ll just try to find someone on linkedin or something and send it to them instead. It feels less horrible if the victim isn’t somebody I know. If it’s personal, it feels like murder.
You’ve probably been wondering why I divided this all into stages, why I told you to only look at one each day. It’s actually very simple; I didn’t want you to call the police. It is very possible that by the time you are reading this, I am already dead.
I don’t want to see how much this thing can make me suffer. I’m hoping that after I pass on the email, it will just leave me alone, but I can’t trust that that is the case. I don’t want to be put on suicide watch and kept from getting out of this if there is no other way.
At the same time, I want other people to know. I don’t want anyone else to have to suffer through this like I have. I want the next idiot to download lookatme.png to have a fighting chance, an idea of what they’re up against. This is the only way I can make that happen.
I’m going to send these documents to you Helen, so you can spread them far and wide. Then, I’m sending the email. What happens after that, I don’t know.
Thank you.
^{Postscript
Immediately after reading this final document, I made the hour long drive to Trinity’s house. I will admit, I feel like a total fool for not having called the police in the first place, but I knew that it was at this point already too late if the worst had occurred. Fortunately, I knew where Trinity had left a spare house key under a false stone in her front yard, so I didn’t need to resort to breaking and entering.
Despite the car in the driveway, I was greeted with an empty house, In some ways this was more disturbing than if I had found Trinity’s corpse dangling from a beam. Nothing seemed to be missing, and the suitcase containing her clothes from her brief stay at the motel sat open in the entryway.
The only sign of Trinity’s presence that I found was her laptop, long-since dead from battery drain, with a battered old flash drive plugged into one of the USB ports. For obvious reasons, I did not remove it.
I have filed a missing persons report with the local police, and dearly hope that someday, somehow, Trinity will be found, safe, alive, and unharmed.}