It was my cousin sister's wedding and we are Indians, so if you are Indian or know Indian friends/weddings, you know the drill - the daysss long wedding events, the heavy dresses and jewelry, and also, some serious family dramas.
My cousin and I are very close even if there is a huge age gap between us. Naturally, when her wedding came around I was very excited and I helped a lot with the planning and decoration and the food - literally everything. It was exactly as we have imagined her wedding to be like. Just perfect in every way possible. But again, it's a wedding. How is a wedding ever complete with a Drama Llama? So dear potato community, here is the tea.
The man that my cousin was marrying to, my current BIL, is an amazing man who has been with my cousin since their college days. They were friends in their college days and when they started working they joined the same company so they remained close to each other. Friendship turned into love and they decided to date and eventually get married. Both the families were informed and everyone was very happy with their decisions, except just one person. BIL's sister. She didn't have any personal problems with my cousin, her only issue was that her best friend liked my BIL, let's name this friend the 'idiot' (because she truly is an idiot and this is honestly the nicest word I can use for her).
When idiot found out that BIL loved someone else and is getting married, she went ballistic. She has been trying to get his attention for so many years and he didn't even turn towards her even for one day and he was being head over heels for my cousin. I understand her being upset, I have been a girl in love and in heartbreak too, but I wouldn't try to break someone's marriage because of my heartbreak.
Yes she tried to stop their marriage via BIL's sister. The two forged all types of absurd accusations on my cousin and tried to anonymously sneak in the accusations in means of messages from unknown numbers to my cousin's then future FIL and MIL, to emails and even letters delivered to their doorstep. My cousin was really stressed because she thought the FIL and MIL would think the accusations are true and would stop the wedding. I told her, "don't worry sisso, I am here." (add dramatic music here and imagine a cape on my back).
My cousin's father (my maternal uncle), me and my brother first went to the FIL and MIL to let them know that all of this was false and that my cousin is innocent. We asked them for some time and that we will find proof of who has been sending them those false news and will let them know of everything and then they are free to judge and make decisions from their side. We got the permission from them and decided to get to work immediately.
One thing I forgot to mention was that BIL used to live in his own house in a different state from where his parents lived after he got a job. Before this, my cousin and BIL used to live in one town and went to college together. Once they got their jobs, they both came to my city, BIL got his own house and my cousin came to live with me. His family came to live with him when he told them that he wanted to marry so they came help him with the wedding arrangements. What's unfortunate is that the sister also brought her best friend, the 'idiot', who was in love with my BIL since she was 15 and BIL was 17.
I mentioned BIL having his own separate house in a new town because it was important to mention. Both his sister and the idiot didn't know he installed security cameras in his house and that the camera was pretty well hidden so they couldn't have noticed either. We asked BIL if we can see the camera's recordings and we saw someone early in the morning at 4 am dropping a letter. Guess who it was... THE IDIOT!! We showed it to my cousin's FIL and MIL and they cross questioned the idiot about it and she was in tears and admitted to everything. She and BIL's sister apologized for everything. They were forgiven and it was a happily ever after... or so you thought...
Everything after that was pretty peaceful, all the arrangements were made and we are now at the wedding day. My cousin was really jumpy and on her toes at all times, she was panicking so bad about everything. My brother and I had to sit her down and talk her out of her panic. She however mentioned that she was scared that idiot might try to pull up some sick stunt to ruin her wedding day. I however told to her calm down cause I wouldn't let my precious angel's wedding get ruined. I have seen enough Charlotte's videos to know that we must always have a backup plan prepared in advance in situations like this. And so I did. I collected a lot of information and evidences and kept them in place in case they come in handy.
I had my suspicions that they would do something to mess up the wedding way before it even became a thought in my cousin's mind, so I did a little research about the two. Since we all belong from the same hometown, I got in contact with my friends who still lived in the town that my cousin and my BIL used to live in. I asked around about these two baboons and found out that BIL's sister had a boyfriend and has even slept with him. Premarital smex is a big no no here. As for the idiot, I found out that she was slowly getting BIL's sister into illegal substances and into becoming a call girl. Again, a big no no. And I think no parent in this world would want their child to do something that would end up in trouble for them and the child as well. I knew my cousin's FIL and MIL would be worried about their daughter and take actions immediately if I let them know of this. I would have told them this after the wedding was over anyway, but that would have been in private so no one else would know, but I guess the girls wanted something else.
Once the wedding ceremony started and the guests were all there, they were enjoying, everyone was having fun and giving their blessings to the new husband and wife to be. These two pain in the asses were going around and gossiping about my cousin to everyone. We noticed that, and we came up with a quick solution. I asked two of my male friends, who is very attractive to go and talk to the girls. However I told them to switch on their recorder and be with them no matter what. God bless my two friends, they did exactly what I told them without thinking twice. They came to me after an hour or so and told me what was going on.
The two girls were planning to ruin her wedding dress. When I tell you that shit was costly, IT WAS COSTLY. It was really heavy with all the heavy stone work that was done on the cream colored lehenga and if it was stained it would be ruined. We could not afford that in any cost. She was taking a glass of juice from the juice counters and tried sitting right behind the bride but I stepped in and told her to go sit behind her brother and that I would sit behind my cousin. She was trying so hard but me and my brother kept pushing her off and away from my cousin. Eventually she did manage to throw it but it accidentally landed on someone from the groom's side and she got scolded by her. While her grumpy face was funny to see, I still had enough because if that aunty wasn't there, it would have been my cousin. After the wedding was over and people were going to start taking the photos with the couple, I announced that me and my brother had some things to say. Initially we talked about the bride and the groom but then we shifted the attention to the groom's sister and her friend. We played the audios of the calls I had with her friends in the hometown as a surprise to the groom's sister. There were a lot of angry faces, some on the sister and some on me and my brother. I tried to explain, that had she and her friend not try to ruin my cousin sister's wedding dress, this wouldn't have been broadcasted to the entire wedding venue. I then called my two male friends and both of their faces was in gasps. Both of them pulled out their phones and I played the recordings on one of the phones, which explained how they were still spreading fake news about my cousin and also them planning to ruin my cousin's dress. We also got the video recording of them actively trying to throw the red colored drink on my cousin's dress.
Both of them got kicked out from there and weren't allowed to enter until the rest of the ceremony was over. Both of them stood outside, making attempts to convince anyone who would listen to them and let them in, but no one paid heed to them. Once everyone got home they were scolded badly and my BIL's sister kept screaming at me that I was so mean and rude to have their truths exposed to not just her family, but to every relative and friends who was there to witness the show. While my cousin was glad that I had her back and my brother is standing in support of me, my parents and some of our relatives think that it should have dealt within the family and shouldn't have been exposed to anyone outside of the immediate family members. AITA?
Note: I am so sorry if the post ended up being too long but I just wanted to give all the context that would be required to judge the entire situation and my actions as well. Also if something doesn't make sense just blame it on my sleepy head cause I wrote it in half sleep mode.

Please don't mind my spelling and/or grammar mistakes as English is my 3rd language. TW:Mentioning su!cide and depression
For context I'm 19(f) and boyfriend of 2 years passed away 1 years ago due to su!cide.Yeah yeah,I know I was young and I couldn't POSSIBLY have known the meaning of true love(🙄),but he was my first love and I was very heartbroken and depressed when I heard abouthis passing.I did eventually get better and started to see people again.I haven't dated anyone after my boyfriend but I've talked to a couple of people who had an interest in me and vice versa and I kid you not,they all had the same initials as my boyfriend,every single one of them (about 7 or 8).A few of them had the same first three letters of his name.Everytime I try to take things to the next level with the guys, i get this sudden realization that I don't actually like them,then i ghost them(I'm bad person,i know but spare me).Which leads me to wonder if my boyfriend is haunting me or something along those lines.
Somebody please help me, I feel like I'm losing my mind🥲 Should I be worried?

Hi all, I received a letter asking for proof of my address. It asked me to send my passport and 2 pieces of evidence that I live at the address I gave. There was a huge list options to send in, however…
I don’t have ANY 2 pieces of evidence as I’m not the one who pays bills/have them in my name. I don’t work so no payslip either. I can’t do a bank statement as my address on there was still my old address. I have changed it now but i’ll have to wait for the next bank statement which is the 3rd/4th of June. I’m not entirely sure how to request my bank statement through the post (as it’s just all online, and I don’t have a printer to print it off). And also, would it come on the 3rd/4th if I am able request my bank statement ?
I have until June 7th to send this in otherwise my PIP claim may be “disallowed”.
What do I do ? It’s hard enough to have someone call on my behalf as it still gives me extreme anxiety. I’m not sure what my boyfriend can even say exactly. If I don’t have evidence, then wouldn’t they just disallow my claim ? Has anyone else been in this situation before ?
(I do wanna note, PIP has tried calling me twice since getting this letter but everytime they did, my boyfriend was at work and because I have severe social anxiety, I couldn’t answer. They left a voicemail after the second call but it was muffled. I could only make out that she was from DWP, calling about PIP.)

i applied for disability in July of 2022 (i have autism and also something physically wrong with my knee but my doctor hasn't figured out what it actually is yet.)
after over a year of going back and forth with the stupid disability place and them sending me packets upon packets or the stupidest questions and me filling them out and sending it back and phone calls and a meeting with a psychiatrist and all kinds of jumping through hoops, they denied it. my autism was diagnosed when i was a toddler and they told me i most likely won't get disability without an updated diagnosis, like they think autism is just something i can outgrow or something.
well, the whole time I've been dealing with them I've also been trying to get refered somewhere to get an updated autism diagnosis but it's very hard to find someone who will diagnose adults, is close enough for me to actually go to (because diagnoses like that usually take multiple appointments), takes my insurance, and doesn't have a 2+ year waiting list. my doctor found me one single place that actually met the criteria (it still had like a 3 year waiting list but beggers cant be choosers) and sent a referral for me but they just never got back to my doctor or me because I also called and asked about it. I've also been doing blood work and x rays and physical therapy and trying really hard to figure out what's wrong with my knee but nothing has come up yet so I'm still just suffering with that.
Well, i appealed the disability thing, they sent it to a judge cause that was the next step, i had a hearing with a judge and a job expert and the judge asked me why i felt like i couldn't work and i literally had a breakdown and cried and told him how i had one job before and it was a super basic job at goodwill working in the back sorting books and not dealing with the public but I still couldn't handle it. I explained how working that job made my knee swell up and be in near constant pain and how the job (working barely 10 hours a week) made me so exhausted that I literally couldn't function outside of work. I would go to work, come home, sleep until my next shift and repeat. I felt like a zombie. The only time I would function was the weekends (barely) and all of that energy and time would be spent on meal prepping for the week so I wouldn't starve because I knew I wouldn't have the energy to make food, and I would do the dishes that piled up all week and sometimes if I had enough energy I would even shower on the weekends. I was so depressed and exhausted and not functioning outside of work at all and one day I woke up at 6 am to my alarm for work and i decided I was either going to quit my job or I was going to off myself and i had the self awareness to quit my job instead of trying to delete myself. and i had such a big meltdown and told all of this to the judge and more. and then i had to sit there, still crying and trying to collect myself while the judge talked with the fricken job expert about how many 'low effort, readily available jobs' HYPOTHETICALLY could exist in my town (this was all based on some bullshit guestimating math equation instead of realistic research into the topic) and then he had the audacity to tell me he "wasn't sure" and "needed time to think about it" just to take 3 fricken months to send me a letter denying my case again because, according to their stupid bullshit, i participated in "substantial gainful activity" (the one job i worked for 3 months and quit so I wouldn't commit unalive) therefore i "can't be disabled."
and it just felt like a spit in the face. like this man really listened to me have a mental breakdown about how the easiest job i could find, working 2-3 hours a day 3 days a week, made me so depressed and nonfunctionial that i was about one more shift away from taking myself off this planet and how my knee hurt so bad i literally just wanted to cut my leg off right above it if it would make the pain stop, and about my autism and how i don't feel like a human i just feel like i was shoved into a human suit and thrown on my ass like 'good luck, figure it out.' and he really listened to all that and still decided that 'im not disabled.' and 'theres plenty of jobs I can do, I just have to find one.' like I'm so stressed and depressed and worried about money constantly that I barely have the capacity to take on anything else, let alone another job that's gonna make me wanna blow my brains out again. I got the letter today and I've cried like 3 times about it because it really feels like I'm already down on the ground and he just decided to kick me with spikey steel toed boots.
I have one more appeal left, where it goes to a disability council (whatever that means) and their options are 1. deny it (most likely to happen) 2. send it back to the judge to 'look at it again' (basically guaranteed for it to get denied) 3. approve it (very very highly unlikely) or 4. throw it out (why is that even an option? That's so stupid) so its like an 80%+ chance of it getting denied from here, and if it gets denied at this point then i have to start all over and the last two years of waiting and hoops and paperwork and crying and pain and feeling like a puppet on display trying to "prove I'm disabled" will just mean literally nothing. And that's a really depressing thing to think about, that the last 2 years of my time and effort and humiliation were basically for nothing.
Besides that, if it gets denied again and I have to start all over, and there's no point in even doing that unless i can get new 'evidence' (like an updated autism diagnosis, which I can't because the one place thats close enough, takes my insurance, and actually tests adults, has a 2+ year waiting list and also won't fricken get back to me about even getting me on that stupid waiting list) and even if I do get an updated diagnosis, they can still deny me disability. I hate this so much.
I feel like a giant brick wall has fallen on top of me. I'm so exhausted mentally and I'm so stressed and I'm so tired of worrying about money and not being able to buy things i need and just barely surviving and I'm just so exhausted of it all. i live with my boyfriend and he has disability and it all goes to the bills and stuff so we have water and power and things, but most times we don't have cleaning supplies or toilet paper or things like that because we don't have the money for it. we only have food because we have foodstamps. I've had my whole wardrobe since highschool and I'm down to 2 pairs of shorts and 3 pairs of leggings because they all rip at the thighs after a while and I'm running out but I don't have money for clothes, y'know? And my boyfriends mom owns the house we live in (she bought it so he wouldn't have to worry about rent and stuff, but then told him he has to pay her back rent for all the years he's been here when he has the money) and she recently told me that when/if i get on disability she expects back rent from me all the way from 2021, which would be like $20,000 at this point and that number just keeps building and it feels like a giant tower looming over me. I don't feel like I'm living, I feel like I'm just barely surviving. And i know there are people out there that have bigger worries then running out of toothpaste and shampoo and not being able to afford more, but like. It's still very real worries I have and I just feel like garbage about it and I'm constantly worried about money and it's just so exhausting.
And to have someone look at me and disect my situation and basically tell me that I'm "not disabled" and basically that I dont deserve money that would help me possibly survive is like a punch in the gut. It hurts, a lot. And I'm so exhausted and upset and frustrated and i really don't know what to do anymore, about any of this stuff.

Me (16m) and my boyfriend (16m) have a really good SE teacher and he decided that we could be moved to the same class. One day, when we got a new seating chart, someone I was placed near noticed how I was talking to my boyfriend. He turned around and gave me a dirty look, you know the kind of look that says “just shut up and we can all be cool.” I took the hint and then shut up. Turns out that using sign language to communicate not only was picked up by his ears, but he told us to shut up again.
after class, I heard him clearly making my boyfriend uncomfortable and I listened to their conversation without intervening, dont want to get The wrong idea. I heard him say “so you used to be a girl?” not in a genuine way, but more condescending. I walked closer and asked my boyfriend what they were talking about. He isn’t deaf but were both in the sign language club and he told me what was wrong in a terrible way, like engrish. It was like “help boy make me uncomfortable” so I told him to back off and to “keep it in your pants, okay? He’s mine”
and that’s when I started getting death threats. Mhm. Probably 12 different signatures in different handwriting with the main idea of “kill yourself, faggot.” The fun part happens now! I brought all 12 or so notes to the principal of my school and began gathering up my posse to write back to them. this didn’t stop either. Every day there were more notes than the last. By the end of the year there were about 50 different strongly worded notes with such vile wording I have no idea what to even say. 50 notes EVERY DAY.
this was when the principal got some of the staff members to write notes. Now obviously I would probably get sent to jail for what was in those letters but the staff couldn’t see. The kid ended up coming to school with bruises all across his body (probably from his abusive parents) the next day. He moved and I never saw him again. me and my boyfriend are now happily together stronger than ever and yes, we did pass SE class. this is my first homosexual relationship and I know that usually the guy proposes marriage but were both men so like… help

Hi guys. I’m in a tough situation and wanted to get advice from strangers without bias of the situation, so I thought Reddit was the best idea. My Ex-boyfriend and I were in an on and off relationship for over a year. He has previously been in a very toxic relationship of which he was manipulated and emotionally abused. You can assume his concept of love was damaged by that. Nonetheless we dated for 8 months until our first breakup, and he, very shortly after, started talking to his online girl bestfriend he had been friends with for years. She had not been an issue in our relationship before. We got back together a month later, our relationship only lasting a month because I was uncomfortable with their relationship. Fast forward a month later he gets back together with me, apologizing for his behavior before, saying how terrible it was. He had gotten with another online friend during our second breakup. Both online friends drop him and block him on everything. Our relationship goes steady for 4 months until a find a love letter on his notes app to the first online friend he never dated. He claimed he needed to let his feelings out and that he doesn’t believe it. That he was tired, and wanted to be with me and not her. When I asked “her or me?” he refused to answer. He also claimed he was going to reach out to her over the summer under the assumption that “we weren’t together?” Is this cheating? What should I even think at this point?

Please someone hear me out about this. It’s about my boyfriends addiction to porn. I’m 19 and he’s 20
My boyfriend is the most loving man I have ever met he buys me flowers without me asking, he writes me letters every single day, he drives to my house just to bring me food and he is the best man I’ve ever known he cries looking into my eyes because he says I’m “beautiful “ he writes down the stuff that I like and he takes pictures of stuff that I like just so he can get them for me later. However, me and him dated for the first time years ago and when he was 15 I found out he watched porn and I was really heartbroken by it, we eventually broke up and moved on with our lives because I made a dumb decision. Fast forward to us dating again now, he said that he stopped watching porn and he’s told me that he hasn’t watched it since we got together last may. He’s been reassuring me about this for a year he’s cried to me about it and how much he hates porn and he swore up and down that he hadn’t watched it ever since we first got together last may. Today he couldn’t take the guilt anymore and he confessed that he’s be lying to me for a year and he still has an addiction to porn and he never actually stopped I’ve never seen him cry harder than today he says he felt ashamed and disgusted in himself and that’s why he never wanted to tell me the truth. He said he’s tried many things he’s even tried blocking adult websites on his browsers. Here’s the problem I have with this, I know how addictions work no matter how much u want to stop your brain wants the dopamine more and more I understand that part. But the thing is that he has videos of us having sex and pictures of me and the videos of us having sex is literally porn it’s categorized as porn it’s the same thing he’s watching on porn sites he doesn’t watch anything weird he only ever watches people having sex but I just don’t understand why doesn’t his brain think that OUR videos are porn. This just makes me worry that my body isn’t good enough and our sex just isn’t enough for him because he has so many pictures and videos of us that literally are straight up porn so why does he feel the need to look at other people why is the addiction still there. Please anyone If there is some kind of explanation to this scientific psychological or neurological. I’m really contemplating on leaving him over this but I also understand addiction and i see how hard he’s tried to stop and he desperately wants help and he wants to stop more than anything but I just need an explanation to why isn’t he satisfied watching our sex tapes I just need to understand.

My boyfriend of 6 years (21) and me f (22) have gotten into a stupid argument today that seems to have ended in us breaking up. I was so blind sided. Asked him yesterday if we were okay and if he was doing okay and he said yes. Him bottling things up have been a problem in the past. I panicked over seeing a letter from his loan company saying he was being sued. He told me he was paying. I said “you lied why do you always lie?” Meaning about bills being ok. Well he hated that. I took a minute to myself, apologized, and he said he was done. Didn’t want to be together anymore. Idk what to do. I’m so scared. I don’t understand. I had one bad day, when he has many and takes them out on me. One bad day for me and that’s it? I’ll lose my house, my dogs who are my babies and it kills me to say I’ll lose them, have to move back with my parents, lose 6 years of my life. Idk what to do. I’m scared I’m panicking…I just want this to all end and go back to normal…

I (21F)am having constant anxiety about my past relationship with my ex-boyfriend(24M). I wish I left when things were good and cordial. I went over to his place because I did lash extensions there, we were over but I needed some time before I could move out to a private suite. We were okay with this. Days before this he blind sided me saying he wanted to be alone and focus on building his career and self. My intuition didn’t believe him.
I went in his phone and I wish I never did but I woke him up. I was filled with rage and confusion. He slept with someone else the day before he broke things off with me. I felt betrayed. I got with this man because he told me stories about his past relationship and toxic family. I felt sorry for him, that he never had anyone love him unconditionally. I did and tried but he did me so dirty. This was my first boyfriend. He took my virginity.
I regret that night. I hit him for the second time ever. Something I promised I would never do again because it hurt him so badly the first time, he cried. I’m sure he felt emasculated and I don’t even know when I did it. I just did. I knew then was the last time we could ever be together and things should have been done from long ago. I just held on because I was afraid to lose him, he was my bestfriend. I just wish he was honest.
I haven’t spoken to him since. That night he told me some horrible things. He told me the girl he slept with was the one he really loved. She lives in the states, so they can’t be together. This was from when he was 17. He said she’s the girl who got away. He said they made love and it was amazing, better than anything he’s experienced with me. He told me that small amount of time he spent with her made him want to be a better man and it was worth more than all the time we’ve had together. He said that she was a part of his literal heart. He said she just brights up a room and her smile is everything. He made me listen and deep down I knew so it was that I could be gone for good. We had sex a week after them two (when I didn’t know), however it felt off and cold. That’s what pushed me to get to the truth. I even dreamt it. My curiosity had to be satisfied.
I was desperate for a little bit of love and appreciation that I’ve poured into him these past years. I watched him bloom into a better man. I battled with trusting him and that made me a bad girlfriend but I wanted to so badly. I wanted us to have a happy ending.
I’m disheartened that in the end he told me that he thinks low of me and that I was worthless. He said I was just a placeholder. I knew I had to leave for good. He kicked me out, I packed my stuff…sent him a letter by text apologizing for hitting him two days later and blocked him on everything.
All I think about is will he forgive me for hitting him. I never wanted to be toxic or abusive but that’s what that relationship brought out of me. He was my first love and sadly he broke me so profoundly that I don’t think I’ll ever be that sweet and excited 18 year old girl that I was before I met him.

Hi everyone! It’s the first time I’m posting on Reddit so I don’t really know how it works.. I need some advice/help about my long distance relationship.
He is a cis male who’s 20 (almost 21). I am a cis female who’s 18 (almost 19).
We live about 600km away from each other, but we live in the same country. We both live with our respective families.
So to make context, we’ve met each other on discord via a server etc in 2018.. and honestly I thought we matched well, I mean we got along extremely well as friends. We had a fight after one year of friendship where we blocked each other.
One year passed by (we are now in 2020) and we got in touch again! Because I kind of missed him and he was like one of my friends who got along with me the best (we had a common friend and we’ve stopped to block each other). After reconnecting with him, about 2 years went by (now in 2022) and I started to catch romantic feelings for him. I didn’t tell him, and he’s naturally a flirty guy, so flirting with him and subtly telling him flirty stuff, that I genuinely thought, was easy. I never really saw his face at that time, only parts of his body, like hands, legs etc.. but never his face. In July 2022, I decided to tell him how I felt after telling my friends about our relationship (they knew him from discord servers in 2018). One of my friends told me to tell him about my feelings because, when they read our convos that I sent them, they felt like he had feelings for me too. So I tell him everything, because that day I felt a bit angry that he didn’t really care about leaving me on read for a few hours… (won’t go into details) I told him everything and we had a fight,, he told me he didn’t like me back and that he saw me more like a little sister and stuff. I kind of accepted it at first but I got too nervous(?) that I started to say stuff that made nonsense and he just got angry back. We made up the following day..
Time goes by and we’re now in December 2022, we still had the same relationship as before, even when I thought it’ll never be the same after telling him my feelings, but he was okay with it. I believe the relationship was better and he was genuinely more flirty. Btw we saw each other faces! As new year comes, he tells me at night at exactly 1am right after celebrating the new year, he asks me if I wanted to become his girlfriend. And I never felt so happy and obviously said yes, even when I told him that I hesitated because I wanted to meet him irl first.. It was somehow overwhelming but I never slept THAT GOOD before. Months goes by, yk couple stuff sometimes we argued but it’s okay never went too wrong, we’d call each other too.
July 2023, we argued, I can’t really remember about what but that time I went too far, telling him that maybe we were better not together. So he made me a whole paragraph about how he felt, that he has never really liked me and how he felt wasn’t love like how I felt… to be honest that is the only thing I can remember. I remember pleading him so much after that, crying my eyes out and telling my sibling about what happened with him. I never felt that bad, my first heartbreak. I felt so stupid thinking that I believed he liked me back… and honestly I don’t know… it felt like he liked me? He made so much effort in so many things and was the kindest and most understanding person at that time. I don’t know how it went wrong. I told him, we could never ever be friends again after what we went through, but for him it was still okay. I didn’t speak to him for days, but we mostly still had talks daily.
Months went by, some days were okay we had a good friendship, almost besties I could say, some days just went wrong and so we wouldn’t talk for days (especially me) but he’d still try to reach out by modifying his last text asking if I’m still here, if I’m doing okay and if it’s a farewell then he hopes that I’d live a good life(he’d do that during many days, for instance : if we didn’t talk for one week he’d write something on day 2, then another thing on day 4 etc). I decided to send him a letter and a bracelet (in Feb 2024) I made for him when we were still together that I didn’t dare to send him at that time, at that moment we kind of reconnected(?) He was more sweet and probably thankful, I believe. We genuinely got along very very well, and I kind of believed we still had something yk? Somehow we started to see each other even more (by that i mean we saw every part of our body), he kind of got more gentle? I think we just got a bit more intimate than we were before so I genuinely thought that maybe that time was the right one. Our relationship was not really defined, it was hard to tell what we were. I told him, after a month, that I would come and see him during summer vacation and he was a bit worried about the cost and stuff since he didn’t really want me to meet his family (he has a bad relationship with them, so he never makes his family meet his friends and vice versa). So he thought about the cost of the trip, the food, the stay, what I’ll do if I come, etc.. Honestly, at first the idea didn’t seem to delight him, but I believe he was especially worried about how much I’d spend only to see him. When I decided that, I felt like that even If I’d lose him, at least I would have met him once, that I know how he is in real life. At the end, he was okay with the idea and seemed pretty joyful about it !
Months went by, (May 2024) we argued. (I am a very sensitive person so I cry when I feel too much and I cry VERY easily, so when we argue I’d usually cry, but I’d do that with everyone I argue with.. On the other hand, he is not very empathetic and almost never cries ). Honestly I don’t really remember why. He wanted to fix it, because he knew that on the long run, we wouldn’t last if we kept that going. So I tell him that we should tell each other what bother us and what we want to improve. He replied to me saying that maybe we might just not match each other that well. So I started to not understand and get angry at him. We talked, and I don’t know how we achieved to get there but I started to tell him how I felt but not like I did before, I don’t really know how to explain it but it was just how I really felt about him. He replied. He said that he was sorry for everything, that he might not love me like I love him, that he feels bad for seeing everything about me and stuff, that he is 20 and that he wants to find someone, that he doesn’t see any future with long distance, that he was not here for my body and that I am someone amazing but that he is scared to destroy me. He is always scared to hurt me, because I get hurt very easily.. He believes that he destroyed our friendship and everything bc of what we shared without guaranteeing that he’d be my boyfriend. He often asks himself if he wants to be my boyfriend but he thinks that he doesn’t love me like I love him. He says that he is sorry that I fell in love with a coward like him. I didn’t cry reading it. Maybe because I thought it might have been worse or maybe just because I’ve already went through it. I ask him if distance is really the problem and he just tells me that he can’t really see himself doing that and that we are too young, we are each other first boyfriend and girlfriend.. I believe that he is the love of my life, I feel great talking to him, I feel the most comfortable and I don’t know if I’ll ever meet someone with whom I’m that close. I am very shy and only have a few friends. He is very friendly, he has a bunch of friends and a few close friends. Anyway I told him that I want him to give me one chance, just to meet him first and then to see if we match.. he said ok, but can’t assure me that it’ll work and wants me to promise him that I’ll move on if it doesn’t work.
Knowing that we’d do long distance for 1-2 years, I believe this is fine, we’d see each other on weekends and vacations. But he believes this is gonna be too complicated and requires a lot of sacrifice.
I don’t know what to do… I want to meet him and believe this is gonna work but on the other hand I feel like our relationship might be impossible because he would never really feels comfortable with long distance. I know 2 years is hard, keeping him that many years seems impossible. I am really lost right now.
At first I thought that our relationship might destroy me because I felt so insecure about everything when he didn’t reply or text me what he was doing… it was so hard to give him enough confidence I guess ? He has a lot of girl friends (but still mostly guy friend) so I used to look at his following list on Instagram.. honestly I stalked him… he was very active on Instagram and a lot of times he would be active and not reply to me… but after our breakup I stopped stalking him, and I just gave him more confidence, i knew what I used to do was wrong, he obviously has a life besides me. I believed it had become better but I was certainly wrong..
NB: He is really bad with dates 📅, but he remembers my birthday very well.. he has my birthday date as his phone password. I used to have his when we were together in 2023 but when we broke up I changed it and I didn’t change to his again since I still don’t know what we really are. I sometimes believe he loves me, I believe it. But if he tells me otherwise I just have to stop being delusional.
I might have forgotten important details.. but I’d like to have someone’s perspective on that.. I don’t really know if I should still meet him.. I know we are young…

I had my first official boyfriend at 16 I can't say his real name so I will call him James, James and I met when we were 14 years old when some mutual friends introduced us, we were very close and we had many tastes in common in short we got along excellently.
When I turned 16 James and I got together, but there came a time when I didn't feel comfortable with the relationship I felt I couldn't be with anyone but him, he wanted to be with me all the time and eventually isolated me from all my friends. When I realized this, I tried dating more friends and eventually realized all the red flags James had, so I broke up with him.
When we broke up James proposed me to be friends again and despite feeling very uncomfortable I accepted because I felt very bad about ending the relationship.
In the end, it ended up being the same as in the relationship he wanted to be together all the time, not to talk to people outside his circle of friends, so a few weeks later I decided that I couldn't let this happen to me again and I got as far away from him as I could.
Here is where the worst started for me, I started to talk to my old friends that I had lost contact with and the first weeks went very well they left me alone but after a while, when I was alone, some of those times I saw him looking at me all the time with his eyes fixed on me, at first I didn't pay attention to him because I thought I was still paranoid but this started to happen very often.
If I went to a certain place like the soccer fields he would show up in a matter of minutes all the time almost all day, a couple of his friends did the same thing when he missed school or couldn't go where I was, for those who say maybe you were paranoid about what happened when you broke up with him, I was not, several of my friends moved away from me because of this they noticed it just like me and they got very nervous about the person following me, James was not even discreet all the people around me noticed him, the first days I noticed him I remember I was alone but in places with a lot of people, in the passes several times in front of me seeing me or he would sit a couple of meters away from me.
This went on for months I remember a friend, Alex, told me that James would climb to the top floors of the nearest building to see me from above without me noticing him, little by little I was hiding almost all day at school, nobody helped me, my mother said it was no problem.
The only person who listened to me and told me to tell him if he tried to do something to me to tell him was a cousin on my mother's side of the family.
I was very scared and I started begging my friends to never leave me alone, they hid me the best they could from him and they listened to me by not letting me be alone, almost at the end of the school year, the friends that he sent to watch over me came to me and gave me a letter and told me they would come for me to see James the next day.
When I read the letter it said that he loved me and wanted us to be boyfriend and girlfriend again, I was honestly very scared for the next day I wrote him another letter and told his friends to take it to him, James didn't say anything to me after that but he didn't stop following me.
I want a few last things before finishing the story 1-Not only did I end the relationship because of the obsession, but I also had a crisis about my sexuality.
2-He was the first relationship I had in my life and I did not know how to identify the red flags that the relationship had from the beginning.
I would like people to tell me if it was wrong to end the relationship with him or if I had to talk to him more.

me and my boyfriend (both 15m + long distance) have been dating for 2 months and at first it was awesome, we would always talk constantly for the first 3 weeks non stop. i love him so much and i know he loves me, but recently hes been VERY distant. like he only messages me around 7pm and its always only a few messages before he tells me hes gonna go.
i know being long distance this type of stuff is gonna happen but hes changed a bit. he used to be super lovey-dovey, it just feels like he doesnt put much effort into it. he sometimes leaves me on seen and says he forgot to reply which i get but im worried theres someone else. he sent me a love letter awhile ago but now the most i get is just ‘i love you so much’
i know only 2 months isnt a super long time to date but i love him so much and we always talk about marrying in the future. he’ll say stuff like he’s never going to leave me, but then he just takes hours to respond?
but the main reason im saying all of this is because i messaged him a few times yesterday and he just. didnt respond at all. i sent him a few pictures of things that reminded me of him, a few i love yous and a goodnight message, and i sent a few more today but i got left on seen four hours ago.
i dont know how to bring any of this up to him because i dont want to make him upset but it really bothers me how he doesnt make much of an effort like he used to.
am i just overreacting or should i do something?

When I was a little girl, I looked up to her and wanted to be her. Going into high school, I followed her advice, thinking she was the coolest example of who I wanted to be.
Looking back, at the time, she did nothing but tell me that if I wasn't like her, I wasn't enough. She told me that being myself was embarrassing.
Through high school, things got harder. She fell in with the wrong crowd, letting these horrible friends of hers treat me poorly. Sometimes it did go as far as physical hits and emotional teasing for me telling them that I was uncomfortable or hurt by their behaviour. I grew to hate her. She was so heavily influenced by these people that I no longer thought she was my sister. She became abusive, manipulative, and detached. This I have only properly found out now, through months and months of therapy.
When I was 17, my family decided to immigrate. Over that time, my sister and I had each other and that was all. We got closer and at that time, I felt that our friendship was completely healed. We needed each other through the emotional throws of moving.
In recent years, everything has slowly gone downhill. I at times wonder if it's homesickness or loneliness that has caused her to start changing again. The most recent of it is that she has completely forgotten that I have boundaries I should be allowed to feel safe in. She constantly tries ways to peer pressure me into drinking, vaping, or smoking weed. Neither of which have ever interested me. I can't help but to get angry at how casually she tries to make these things that clearly cause me discomfort. She has also been incredibly invasive of my privacy, snooping through my room until she found a birth control pamphlet, and completely losing her shit at me for being responsible and looking into safe sex with me in my 2-year-long committed relationship. She even pulled my mom into her lecture saying How dare I hide this secret from, my family. My mom later got angry at my sister and was completely in my favor the situation, even saying that she was glad for me being responsible.
My sister has this constant mission of trying to find blackmail on me and always saving it for use later when she is in trouble and needs to lessen the blow. Just a few days ago, she accidentally spilled out that she regularly vapes when clubbing, and when my mom tried to talk to her about it and have an open conversation, she turned and started going on about how everyone vapes including my boyfriend. She completely broke his trust as he has always been ashamed of his vaping and is actively cutting down to try to quit.
She also has this thing about trying to put down my relationship with my boyfriend. She loves discussing his financial and unemployment issues. She likes to call him needy towards me and often gives him the worst assumptions for his behavior. He is a foster child. The last thing he wants is to be told that his flinching is childish and that his ADHD, depression, and anxiety aren't bad enough.
She is also diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and anxiety. I can understand some of her behaviours relating to this but I think there is much more.
She enjoys putting me through hell. I can see how excited she becomes every time she finds new blackmail. She quite literally smirks in joy once she has released that blackmail. She finds it amusing to diagnose me herself, labeling me depressed or autistic as if she just knows. She doesn't know that recently my therapist referred me to get tested for OCD. I'm scared she will only pick at me more, once she finds out. I've lost all trust in her, and honestly, some of the stuff she does can destroy me mentally. There's so much more she does, but I'm only getting sadder, thinking about how much I miss the real her.
What do I do? I want to write her a letter or talk to my mom but I don't know what I can possibly say to feel better.

Hi, I have been studying at a community college for 3 semesters now as an international student. I had a sponsor at the beginning helping me apply to the community college and I got in. Once I was in, my sponsor stepped back on landing me the money to study so my boyfriend is now landing me the money and I’ll pay him back as soon as I can. As I finished my 3rd semester I applied to transfer to 6 universities and colleges who gives a need based or need blind financial aid to international students and hoped to transfer to those and get my BA degree. However, all 6 rejected me. I have a 4.0 GPA, I’m from Brazil, I do lots of volunteering in the area of my degree and got really good letters of recommendations. Still, nothing. I assume what made them reject me is that I have no money at all to pay anything and that they would have to give me a full ride. So at this point I’ll be finishing up my 4th semester at the community college that I’m at which will be the last thing my boyfriend will have the money to pay as well. I’ll graduate with my associates degree but I would love to get my BA. Here’s the question. How to apply and get to schools that give good scholarships? How to get accepted into schools that give full rides? Or how to get loans being an international student and apply with loans to the schools? Honestly, anything advice helps! Thank you!!!

An open letter to my ex’s new girlfriend. She deserves to know that he wasn’t faithful to her the first time and was not truly single when they reconnected. My therapist recommended I write about it. It’s been sitting here for a while so I decided to share it and let this be my final closure.
This is all true, with no embellishments and events recounted as I understood them to be. We can only believe the truth that others allow us to see.
D and I met through a local hiking group. I had chatted with D a few times over a year on things like cameras, cars and waterfalls. We followed each other on Insta. I didn’t have anyone to go hiking with me this particular week and had been chatting with D about something, so asked if he would like to hike with me. He said sure and we made plans to meet.
The first impression I had of him was he seemed kind of nerdy and inexperienced. He had long blonde hair pulled back in a ponytail and oval rimless glasses. Just some kid I was going to hike with. He led the way and was quiet at first. But towards the middle of the hike, we talked about where we were in relationships. Or he did. He did most of the talking. He told me about a friend with benefits situation with A. That he wanted more, but it couldn’t happen because she was living with a guy. And had been for years. The guy was helping raise her daughter, who she had gotten pregnant with during a teenage one night stand. A basic single mom. D had gotten his dog from them, a great dane and said he had kept in touch with her and taken some pictures of the puppies they had. At some point, D and A began a sexual relationship. I never asked how it happened, who initiated, I was just stunned that this guy dumped this on me, someone he knew for literally hours. It made me feel gross. He justified his interaction with her because her partneboyfriend was a narcissist and treated her horribly. She was claiming to be in the process of moving out and he said when she was, they could be a public couple. He told me details about her - her job, what kind of car she drove, how they communicated. He obviously was hung up on her. I asked him if he didn’t feel bad for cheating, and he said no, he wasn’t cheating, that she was, but he wasn’t. He didn’t have anyone to cheat on. I still don’t understand that justification at all. He was partaking in a clandestine act, it was a secret that was kept between them and if it came out, would affect others. This had been going on for four years. He said that A encouraged him to date other people and he had tried on a few occasions. He had met N through his Facebook photography page. He said he only saw her a few times over two months and she was crazy. She texted him twenty times in an hour when he didn’t respond. So he blocked her. I told him he could have just told her he would get back to her later, but he said no, she was annoying. He took the easy way out and blocked her. I notice that this guy takes the easy way out on a lot of things. He truly has no back bone. But we’ll get to that later.
We had a good day. It was a good hike. We continued to talk and spend time together after that. Platonically, then a bit more as time went on. Two months into knowing D, I was with a good friend, K, who I had also met through the group. She had recently broken up with her boyfriend, J. I hadn’t met him, but didn’t like what I heard about him. He had things that he hid from her. They had dated on and off for over a year. She brought up J and said she thinks he was dating this woman where they work believed it started while they were still in a relationship. She said they worked together and named this woman’s job. She said she saw the car she drives. She mentioned that this person had a daughter. All of those details were very specific and exact descriptors of what D had told me about his FWB, A. I hated to see my friend, K, in distress, so I told her that I thought I knew who this person was. I asked if her name might be A, and K said yes, that’s it! I told her that I knew of her through a mutual friend. I said she had lived with a man and she seemed to be in the process of moving out. That’s all I could share. This is where things got weird. I don’t remember how it all happened, but something along the lines of K and J exchanged words. She pressed me for where this knowledge I had came from, so I caved and told her D, but she could not say anything. D had become a bit distant and I was going to tell him, but figured why, if he wasn’t hanging around, I didn’t want to be involved in this. We were casual, nothing set in stone. A few days later, he was being odd and I said, it’s a small world, my friend’s ex is dating someone who drives this kind of car, has this kind of job, sounds just like A. I knew he didn’t know this, and probably still thought he had a chance with A because she was still leading him on even though he claimed he hadn’t seen her in person for months. He was surprised, I could tell he was pissed in the manner he responded. I stepped back and said I didn’t want to be involved in this shit show, I was just letting him know because he deserved to. Apparently A was dating J while still living with the long time boyfriend, but the long time boyfriend didn't know about J or D. D then reached out to the long time boyfriend and told him that A had been cheating on him for years (but failed to tell him that he was the one that A was cheating with, or one of the ones). D loves drama. He even admitted it. He confronted A, sent me a bunch of screen shots of their convo. They kept their convos secret on snapchat. The whole thing is so fucked up, that as I’m writing it out, I can’t believe I was even involved in something like this. I told D to keep me out of it, that I didn’t want to be involved in this. Eventually A moved to her own place and stayed in a relationship with J.
I kept my distance from D, but he would reach out every few days to remind me he was here. We remained friendly for a few months then embarked on what would become a year long relationship. It wasn’t something I planned or even wanted, but it happened and we spent a good amount of time together. Towards the end, I was getting tired of his low vibe energy, his racist, homophobic, transphobic, anti-semetic comments, his lack of engagement conversationally and his very narrow minded world view. He was 34, still living with his parents, with no intentions to leave, wouldn’t spend the night, was breadcrumbing me. I was seeing him for who he really was, not what I envisioned he was. What was I doing? I knew we had to break up, but I put it off. The last time I saw him, he was doing everything he could to turn me off. On his phone constantly (I’m now sure he was already talking with or seeing N, I had a feeling he was chatting with someone), vaping more than usual, the sex wasn’t as connected as it usually was, dropping snide comments, he was just off in a way that was not the him I knew at all. We texted a bit, then a few days later, I called him in the evening. He didn’t answer or call me back. The next night, I texted him that it seemed he was going out of his way to ignore me, so even though I felt our year together deserved a respectable parting, he obviously wasn’t going to give me that. And I was done. He texted immediately that he was going to call me back but he forgot and he was sorry he couldn’t give me more at this time, but he would like to remain friends and I could invite him to hike. Thanks for the good times. I ok’d it and that was it.
I didn’t hear from him at all. On my birthday a few weeks later, I saw a FB post he made about if your birthday is around now, that means your dad looked at your mom on Mother’s Day and said, you’re not a mother now, but I can make you one. It was so stupid. I texted him and said you didn’t have to do higher math to come up with that, you could have just said happy birthday. He responded that he knew a bunch of people with birthdays around then and that was for all of them but happy birthday. I told him thanks, then told him a bit about my new job, and that he was right, it was tiring because I still have my other job when i came home from the new one and sometimes was gone from 6am to 9pm. A while later, he sent me a wall of text, going on about how now imagine doing that 6 nights a week because someone (he was meaning me) wanted you to come over, and if he didn’t, that someone made him feel guilty and all of the work he had to do, and if he couldn’t hike or hang out on the weekend, again, the someone made him feel bad, etc. And if he didn’t comment or respond to every FB or insta post or text that someone got upset. I read it a few times and my response was, first, I don’t know whose house you’re going to 6 nights a week, but it’s not mine. And I don’t get upset if you don’t respond to everything because I rarely post and I wait days for texts sometimes. And this sounds like how you described N, not me, so keep us straight.
A week later, I see N interacting with D’s FB feed. Apparently she got unblocked. Did she reach out to him or him to her first? Just so happens she thought the birthday post was for her. It was all I could do to not comment on it, but I didn’t want to be a part of any of their drama, so I kept it to myself. D had something of mine, I asked for it back. He said he was so busy, he didn’t know when he could get it to me. I waited a week. Sure, I FB stalked N and saw that D had interacted with her stuff in an overly friendly manner. I’m not stupid and I’m more observant than I let on. So I contacted him for my item again and offered to come get it. He said he wouldn’t be home (it was a Monday night, he was always home on Monday nights - we rarely got together on Mondays because the few times we did, he was always in a mood, so I kept Mondays distant). I said i could meet him somewhere when he got home and that I just wanted to get this over with. He said he didn’t know what that meant, but ok. I said I notice that you’ve reacquainted yourself with N. That’s an interesting choice. I guess you’ll be at her house tonight. An hour later, he left the item by my back steps and sped away in his obnoxiously loud man child sportscar that he can only afford because he still lives with his parents. I called, he didn’t answer. I texted and asked if I needed to get an STD test and the only thing he said was “I never cheated on you.” Cheating to him just means he didn’t have sex with her while we were still together, but I don’t believe that either. Why would I? I deleted him immediately. He has a second FB profile that he uses just to snoop, and I let that one remain.
He had told me he would never get back together with an ex, especially N. He mentioned her once or twice, never with any enthusiasm, or any kind of empathy. She was easy to snag, a bit desperate. He had mentioned another woman who he was FB friends with. He had hung out with her once, but didn’t like the way she talked, but he said on more than one occasion, “I should date her and be really mean to her and see how long it takes for her to walk away”. People who think that way are not ok. They are off in the head. D really had very limited compassion and no moral compass. It took me a while to get over it, I think mostly because we didn’t have closure. We had split up for a week a few months into the relationship, and I asked for a convo, I just wanted to state a few things. We didn’t argue, I asked him questions, I felt settled and thanked him for allowing me that space to talk. We both agreed it was better when we communicated like that. He said he wasn’t happy about our parting and he would still like to see me. I agreed because it seemed like we had come to a mutual place of understanding, but we never had communication like that again. I wish he would have just broken things off earlier, instead of lining N up before he could fully disengage from me. He’s a complete coward and that along with him leaving the item by my back step proves it to me. He couldn’t be a man and look me in the eye. Maybe N is more his speed. Maybe she has the same narrow world views and disrespect for others of different races and religious beliefs. Maybe they are a match. But I wanted to let her know the kind of person he really is, and I think she knows. She just doesn't want to believe it, when honestly, having him as a partner is not a flex. Quite the opposite when you know the kind of person he is. I’ll bet he told N that I texted him non stop too, which I never did. D probably says all of his exes are crazy, now including me. If I ever run into D and N, I will happily hand my phone over and share his texts and screen shots so she can see the truth. Maybe she will stumble upon this, but I doubt it. Whether she believes it or not is up to her.

A/N: Hey! Here's a "surprise" follow up to the first oneshot, and... gasp characterization of Karska?
Not anything super special, just a fluff piece(like most of my stories actually...) been sitting on this for a month, but as I said in my announcement post, things have been kinda weird for the past month.
Again sorry about that, it's not that I haven't wanted to write or anything, or that I was getting burnt out, just got sidetracked.
I think that's all I have to say about that...
Hope you enjoy this story, and all the others to come!
Wait a second... OH YEAH!
Credit to u/SpacePaladin15 for the universe, u/thescoutisspeed for causing the domino effect that made me write. And finally my good friend and Editor u/ConfusionEmpty3542.
Now with further adieu.

Let's get on with the story

Memory Transcript: Karska, Venlil Citizen, Participant of the Venlil-Human Exchange program Date: [standardized human time] 2136, [exact date unknown, presumably pre-earth attack]
Warm… Comfortable…
Those are my first thoughts as I awaken in the arms of my human.
I keep my eyes closed, basking in Axel’s warmth, the feeling of his arms around me. The daze of my half asleep state only makes it better.
I run my hands along my human’s back, feeling the dips and curves of his bone and muscles clearly through the skin. I slowly trail a finger along his spine feeling each divoit as I do.
Do I have to get up?
I snuggle closer to my human, wrapping my tail and legs tighter around their legs. I press my snout deeper into Axel’s neck, sighing lightly in content as I feel my humans pulse against my face.
This warmth… this comfort…
Can’t I just stay here a moment more? With no worries, just me and my human?
I press my chest deeper against my humans, pulling him closer with a hand around his waist, my other hand continues to gently trail along Axel’s back, taking in the firmness of the shoulder blades after I reach the end of Axels spine.
I think I can afford to stay here a bit… just a little bit…
Though I doubt I could bring myself to part from my human like this… if only it didn’t take so much time to care for my fur…
It's worth it though, even if I don’t get to experience this for as long as I’d wish…
I feel a twitch, and sleepily open one of my eyes. My vision reveals the room around me, still the same as last night. Knick-nacks lining shelves and tables, some clothes strewn about…
I’m gonna have Axel clean those up at some point…
I feel another twitch and flick my ear, before focusing my gaze to Axel…
Oh dear…
I can hear his heart drumming against his chest, almost like it’s struggling to escape. I see his sleeping face scrunched, his brows furrowed, his mouth marred in a deep frown as he shivers and gasps lightly.
I feel my heart drop slightly at the unfortunately familiar sight of my human having a nightmare.
“No… No…!” Axel murmurs, his brows furrowing even more as his shifting becomes more erratic, with him beginning to toss a little in my grasp.
“Shhh… it’s okay Axel.” I gently whisper to my sleeping human, shifting myself upwards just enough so that I could gently rest Axels face against my shoulder.
I feel a spike of instinctual fear, at having a predator so close to my neck.
I feel that familiar voice in the back of my head tell me to, run, hide, get awa–
But I easily quash that fear, overriding it with my care and worry for my beloved human.
I feel their grip tighten around me, as tears leak from their sleeping eyes. I do my best to comfort them any way I can.
I run my fingers through their scalp, hugging their larger frame against mine as tightly as I can as they continue to murmur and lightly thrash.
“I… I can’t, I Cant–!” They gasp out against my fur, their voice filled with grief, with pain.
It makes my heart ache, to not be able to soothe my human’s woes…
“Its fine Axel… No need to worry, I got you…” I whisper, feeling my tail tighten around my human in worry, and my ears flick back in response.
I wish I could help my human more with this… but every time I mention it they try to change the subject…
It worries me, but I trust my human, I trust him to trust me…
I begin to gently hum, running one hand along Axel’s back and the other through his scalp as I attempt to comfort him in the way I’ve found best works.
I hum a lullaby my mother used to sing to me, when I was but a child… it worked wonders whenever I couldn’t sleep cause I felt like…
No matter… I flick my ear in a negatory fashion, trying to ignore the errant thoughts as I sit there cuddling my crying human, trying my best to ease his nightmares.
I feel his thrashing slowly begin to die off as I gently hum the familiar tune, I feel his arms loosen their grip as he slowly begins to calm down.
I feel their heartbeat begin to slow, going from a fearful quickened pace, to its slow gentle pace… just as it should be. Just as it needs to be.
I sigh in happiness, glad to have comforted my human as best I can. My ears follow suit and perk up lightly in content.
I sit there for a few moments more, not knowing how long I was awake, and not really caring… thankfully today’s a day off, so I shouldn’t have to do much.
I feel Axel’s gentle breathing wash over my chest, the warmth bathing my form, along with the familiar comfort. I feel the wet spot on my shoulder, where his tears stained my fur.
I sigh, I want to stay here all day today… I honestly want to just spend this day off cuddling with my human, talking about nothing in particular.
But I need to clean my fur… so it’s all shiny, and soft, and nice for my human…
And it takes me a good quarter claw[an hour] to care for…
“I’m gonna go bathe, okay?” I gently coo to my sleeping boyfriend, gently ruffling their hair.
Do I have to go?
Can’t I just stay cuddled up to them like this?
What if they get another nightmare? What if I’m not there to comfort them?
What if–
I flick my ear and lightly shake my head, frowning lightly at those thoughts, at the familiar anxiety.
It’ll be fine, they’ll be fine for an hour or so… They shouldn’t have another nightmare…
I hope…
But what if they do, and I’m not there to comfort them?
I feel myself frown a bit deeper as I continue down this spiral of worry for my human, wanting nothing more than to stay pressed against them like this…
But I have to go.
And so with great reluctance, I begin to extricate myself from my humans spidery limbs.
I try my best to not wake my human, knowing that they probably need their sleep… especially with how tired they always look…
Eventually after a few [minutes] I finally managed to slip myself from his lanky arms.
My tail however is still wrapped tight around one of his legs, I sigh and lean down, gently petting my human on his scalp, and shifting the blanket slightly to better keep him warm.
“I’ll be right back.” I gently coo to the sleeping human, and sigh at the lack of warmth that now makes the room feel just a bit colder…
I stand there for a moment, debating if it’s worth it to clean my fur now…
I mean, I can just wait until Axel’s awake! I don’t have to do it now!
I know that they’re just excuses… it feels like ages pass as I stand beside the bed, my human none the wiser to my internal struggle.
I sigh, before finally slipping my tail from their leg, doing so very slowly and deliberately, trying my best to not wake my human as my mind tries to convince me to stay.
I mean… surely I could just stay with them a bit longer? Just a little bit?
I focused my gaze on Axel’s sleeping face, my brows furrowing slightly as my ears swivel back in sadness…
He looks so peaceful… so cute…
My soft paw pads press against his hair which I gently tousle, before mournfully sighing.
If I keep this up, I won’t get anything done at this rate.
I can’t just keep awkwardly standing here… I need to choose…
Do I stay cuddled up next to Axel, or do I at the least clean up my fur so it’s all soft for my human? Comfort for my human now? Or better comfort and snuggling later?
… It’s very tempting… but it’d probably make my human very happy to cuddle with me all day when my fleece is softer…
I flick my ear in affirmation, setting my eyes in a determined look…
I lean down and gently lick Axel on the cheek in an affectionate gesture.
“I love you, my human.” I gently purr, nudging my snout against them before gently stepping out of the dark room.
I make sure to just barely slip out of the door, trying my best to not let the gentle golden rays of Venlil Prime’s sun slip into the darkened room.
The hallway is just a little less dark, with all of the mechanical blinds around the apartment shut over the windows to make sleep easier.
I softly step through the hallway, my steps gentle as can be, as I try my best to keep quiet…
I already regret not deciding to stay by my human, but I’ve made my choice.
It’ll only be for a half a claw at most, not that long away from my human.
I feel my ears pin themselves back at my displeasure, and I slip into our bathroom.
It’ll be fine… the quicker I clean up my fleece, the quicker I get back to cuddling my human…
I gaze around the bathroom, my wide vision allowing me to take in the entirety of the room.
The bathtub and shower on one side, sink and countertop on the other…
A large mirror coats one wall, and a medicine cabinet is next to the light switch.
It’s rather plain, if not cozy…
It’s my home. Our home…
I feel my tail wave in happiness as I glance at the various things laid on the counter.
Toothbrushes, toothpaste… a few random items here and there…
And a few medicines… I can’t read the label for them… but I know the language printed on them.
English, I believe that’s what it’s called, the spidery lettering is unmistakeable, unlike most any other language I’ve seen; granted I haven’t seen many.
They’re for Axel… I don’t know what for, and he only got them recently…
When I asked he told me it’s nothing too bad… I’m worried for him but…
I trust him, he’ll tell me when he’s ready, I trust him to trust me…
I take another glance looking at the bottles along with an odd box, similar to some of the packages in our kitchen…
Well…
Surely he wouldn’t mind if I just looked a bit closer at one… its not like I can understand what they say…
I reach over, and grab one of the bottles, adjusting my grip on my toothbrush as I do so.
The one I pick up is made of a Transparent orange plastic, at it makes a rattling sound somewhat similar to some Venlil instruments. Inside is a bunch of small yellow ish pills, embedded with a number I can’t make out… I try to read the text but it’s completely illegible to me…
I sigh and go back to brushing my teeth, setting the bottle down as my focus is split between brushing and examining the other bottle.
It was made of a clear, somewhat brownish plastic, and it looked rather hefty, it was much larger than the previously mentioned bottle, on it amongst the various other words is two large letters with assumably some numerical subscript. It reads:
‘K2+D3’
I have no idea the meaning behind the letters, I assume however that if I could read human it would make much more sense…
I then turn my gaze to the box, covered in more of the illegible, to me, text covers the outside of said box. It was a white and much taller and wider than the pill bottles but a lot less thick…
I see a flap on the top, and trail my hand towards it…
Surely one peek wouldn’t hurt, right?
I shake my head, ignoring that thought. No I shouldn’t, it’s not my place to, Axel will tell me when he wants to…
I should trust my boyfriend… and besides, it’s not like it matters that much… right?
It’s not like whatever Axel has is that bad…
Yeah… I’m sure it’s fine. Besides, Axel seems to be getting healthier!
So whatever those pills are for, they’re helping him, and in the end, that’s all that matters!
I spit out the toothpaste, rinsing my mouth with water along with the brush, before I look to the tub, and turn the showerhead and water on, waiting for it to heat up.
I frown lightly, as I think back to Axel…
I hope he’s doing okay.
I shake my head and try to focus on other things as the water heats up and I hop into the shower.
Like how much my life’s changed these past few months!
If you told me I would be dating a predator just two months ago, I would have thought you were going crazy…
But look at me now! I have a wonderful boyfriend… one whom I’ve felt closer to than in any other past relationship I’ve had.
I love my human, I really do…
I glance to my bottle of Cherine scented shampoo, and grimace as I wet my fleece.
Almost out. Gonna have to get more soon, and Axel loves it’s smell so much too…
I shake my head of that thought and return to my previous line of thinking…
What could I say about my human to do him justice?
His kindness? He really is quite kind after all… probably too kind…
He should really put himself first more, and stop worrying so much about me…
I begin the arduous process of scrubbing the Cherine scented shampoo, making extra sure to rub at the parts of my fleece stained with sweat or tears…
The reminder of the tears staining my shoulder reminds me of Axel…
He tends to have nightmares, thankfully that wasn’t the worst of it… though the longer I stay in here the more likely it would be that they slip back into a nightmare…
I feel my ears flick back in worry at that thought, but I continue my meticulous scrubbing, being sure that I get all the dirt and gunk out.
Then I begin to properly rinse off the shampoo, making sure all of the suds go down the drain, as I idly think…
How long have I already been in the shower?
A quarter claw?
Is Axel okay? He is isn’t he?
I mean what’s the chance he gets another nightmare? And… it’s not like I can’t comfort him if he does get one…
But I wish he didn’t get them in the first place…
Sometimes I wish Axel wasn’t so Brahking stubborn… that he’d tell me what’s wrong. Maybe then I wouldn’t worry so much…
I’ll probably end up with gray hairs by the next [decade] at this rate…
I then grab the conditioner, it was a citrus-y scent of a Venlil fruit… at least that’s what Axel says it smells like…
I blink away the light brain fog, feeling like I should remember the name of the fruit. Maybe it’s just because I’m still a bit tired?
That’s probably it… I’ll probably remember it later…
Irregardless of that tiny hiccup, I apply the conditioner, putting the same care into scrubbing it into my fleece as I was with the shampoo.
After all if I don’t do it right my fur won’t properly shine! It just wouldn’t be right to not look my best around Axel! No sir!
And so with that in mind I gently scrub in the conditioner, feeling a twinge of worry and irritation as I think back to Axels stubborness…
I sigh, and shake off those thoughts, before beginning to rinse off the conditioner, just as thoroughly as I did with the shampoo.
As Spehing stubborn as Axel can be though… I can’t help but love him.
There’s really no one else like him in the whole galaxy… he fits together with me in a way no one else has…
And sure, maybe he doesn’t tell me everything, but I trust him, I trust him to not hurt me, not intentionally.
I can tell he’s hurting… I can only hope that I can bring him out of whatever state he’s in.
He deserves it, to be happy, to be loved…
More time passes as I eventually rinse off the last of the conditioner, and grab a hand drier to begin drying my fur off.
Almost done! Bed here I come!
I can almost feel myself wrapped in my humans arms… that warmth and comfort…
Ahh… even the thought of it calms me, helps me forget my anxiety…
I spend the next while drying my fur, until I hear a shout from down the hall.
Oh no… Oh no, Oh No Oh NO!
AXEL-!
My chest is filled with utter dread, and I practically throw the hand drier back onto the counter, uncaring if I’m still slightly wet.
My human! I knew it, I knew I should have stayed!
Oh Stars… oh Stars….
I scramble down the small hallway, and stop before the door to our room.
My ears swivel as I listen to my human. I gently open the door, being careful to not alert Axel.
The sight that greets me isn’t a pleasant one…
I can see the sheen of sweat covering Axels bare chest, the dull light from the door glinting off it just right. I see Axel panting, sitting up and staring at a wall.
His eyes are so hazy, and I can see the tears pooling inside them.
Stars damnit… I knew I should’ve stayed… I knew their nightmares got bad, but…
I can see his prosthetic hand gripping over his heart, his chest heaving as he seemingly struggled to gulp down the air… his body trembling violently as those tears shining in his eyes threatened to fall…
“Axel…?” My voice called out in the dark room, I could feel my body tremble in worry, as I look at my human.
His eyes snap to me, and he tenses, jumping in response, before trying to say something…
“K–Kar–ska…” But he can barely even choke out my name, before a heart wrenching sob slips from his throat, and his trembling grows even more.
Oh Stars…
I hastily slip through the door, closing it behind me before dashing over to my human.
My hands get covered in tears when I cup their face but I don’t care Axels afraid and he needs me and–
“It’s okay Axel…” I attempted to comfort my human, trying my best to imitate a smile as I wave my tail, and force my ears into a content position, even though I really feel them want to pin back to my skull in worry and fea–
“K–Kar–…” Axel makes the attempt to speak through his sobbing, before his arms grip around me tightly.
I feel that familiar spark of fear that’s near instantly quashed by an all consuming worry.
Oh Stars, oh Stars…. This is bad this is–
I try to swallow the knot in my throat, gently petting the human on the head as his shaking form grips me like I’ll suddenly disappear.
I don’t care that his tears are staining my fleece, or his sweat, or anything like that…
My boyfriend is scared…
The man who tries way to hard to seem strong in front of others… he’s terrified.
So I need to be strong for him, to let him lean on me, in this moment of weakness…
“Its okay Axel… it’s okay, I’m here…” I nudge my snout against his hair in a comforting gesture, gripping him just as tightly as he is me. “I’m here… so just let it all out okay?”
Their sobs and trembling grow even more at that, and they lean against me in response, their fingers harshly gripping at the still slightly damp fur.
I push Axel back, slipping onto the bed and straddling him as he cries and cries into my chest.
His throat practically chokes as he tries to breathe, as he begins hyperventilating…
Speh! Speh! BRAHK!!!
I gulp once more as I gently press Axels face deeper into my chest, my other hand gingerly wrapped around his shoulder.
“It okay Axel… you’re safe now… I’m here for you.” I gently coo, feeling worry and shame well up inside me.
I should have stayed with him. I shouldn’t have left…
I should’ve known this would happen.
I hear Axel attempt to wail into my chest fur, but his throat is caught by his hyperventilating, which is just getting worse and worse–
SPEH, YOU CAN HATE YOURSELF LATER FOCUS ON AXEL!
I nuzzle my face into his hair. And gently speak out to him as I run my hands gently along his trembling, panicking form.
“It’s okay Axel… You’re okay…” I say in my gentle cooing tone, before continuing on. “I need you to do something for me Axel, can you do that?”
I feel them shakily nod after they gulp, still hyperventilating, and tears still staining my fur as they cry.
“Take a deep breath for me, Axel…” I breath in deeply for emphasis and hold it for a moment. “Now let it out…” I slowly exhaled, my warm breath brushing against their head.
I feel them still shaking as the attempt to follow my lead, but they’re breath catches in their throat which cause them to panic which–
“Don’t worry Axel, take your time…” I reassure my human, gently cradling their head as I nuzzle against them best I can. “We aren’t in a rush… take all the time you need, and just… listen to my heart.”
I continue to breath in and out, cradling the human and pressing him against me.
I feel his grip loosen and his crying begin to die down.
His breathing slowly begins to match mine, despite a couple of hitches, for which I whisper sweet nothings into his ears to reassure him.
Eventually the trembling dies down, eventually I feel his heartbeat begin to match my own.
“There… isn’t that much better?” I ask gently, my worry somewhat assuaged as they slowly come back to reality.
I lean back slightly, sitting down on Axels lap and looking up at him gently, I lightly lick some of the tear streaks on his cheeks in a grooming manner.
He laughs slightly at the attention before leaning back into the headrest. “Y–Yeah…” his voice catches slightly, and he sniffs when he says that.
I feel my heart swell with joy, and I nuzzle into their neck, my eyes crinkling with love as I look up at my human.
He pointedly looks away, a light flush on his face for the moment of weakness.
“You didn’t have to y’know…” he mutters, and a flash of annoyance sparks through me at that.
“No… but I wanted to Axel… because I love you.” I gently speak, my tone conveying no room for argument.
I see Axel pause for a moment, and open his mouth as if he were to insist, but he wisely decides to take the affection. “Thanks…”
A moment of silence washes over us, with me still hugging Axel tightly as I nuzzle against him and being licking him in a familiar grooming manner, showing my boundless affection for him the best way I can.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask, one of my ears leaning to the side in curiosity, as I look into Axels dark green eyes.
He swallows and intently looks at the wall across from the bed, his mouth is set in a thin line as his brows are lightly furrowed.
“I– I couldn’t–.” He stutters for a few moments, before scoffing and giving up, opting to instead bury his face into my neck. “Not really…”
I shake my head at that, accepting that he didn’t want to talk about it, I trust him after all… so if he doesn’t want to talk about it, then we won’t.
“Whenever you’re ready then…” I murmur, focusing instead on grooming my human… well as much as I could groom the rather furless predator…
Though their sweat tastes rather nice…
I hum in happiness as I taste their salty sweat covered skin, slipping my eyes closed and sighing lightly as I lean against my human.
I love the small moments like this, were I can just be myself… where I can relax and just be myself, with no fear of judgement, or being thought of as ‘predatory’.
I love my human.
And though he may not be fully okay, that doesn’t stop my love for him.
That won’t stop me from caring for him like this, for letting him lean on me either…
I only wish my human would let me in more… but I can wait. I can understand why he may be afraid to let me in.
I’m patient, I’ll love him for as long as it takes, for as long as I need.
For him to begin to trust me a bit more… for him to love himself.
“I– Thank you Karska…”Axels gruff voice calls out, with them gently running their hand along the scruff of my neck, which causes my tail to wag in unbridled joy.
“I love you, you bastard.” I say with a light tone, using a term that I picked up from Axel. His eyes widen in surprise before he laughs and laughs.
His head leans back as he laughs in surprise, which causes me to join in, my own laugh much lighter and more whistly in tone.
We laugh for a few moments more, before Axel slowly comes down from his surprise. He smiles genuinely at me, love and care in his eyes.
“I love you too, you damnable sheep.” Their tone is light, and just as joking, before they lightly kiss me on the cheek, which causes my snout to lightly bloom orange.
I feel my tail wave about excitedly, and my eyes lid in content as I lean lovingly against my human.
I slip my eyes closed, falling into that familiar comfort that I awoke to, the warmth, Axels strong arms wrapped around me…
I love this.
I love my human~!
“Anything you want to do today?” Axel asks, I shake my head against his shoulder, pressing my snout deep into the warm skin.
“I just want to cuddle, if it’s fine with you?” I sleepily murmur, cracking an eye open to loving gaze upon him my eyes lightly pleading that he says yes.
He gently chuckles at my antics, before soft petting me, a gentle smile on his face, practically lighting up the room despite how small yet genuine it is.
“Sure.” He says softly, before once more kissing me. I gasp lightly when he gives me one of his love bites, and wack his tail in annoyance.
This is the best.
I wouldn’t trade it for all the stars in the galaxy.
I love my human.
I love so many things about him.
His stubborn nature is one of them… as much as it annoys me at times.
Seeing his mask slip and fall when he’s with me is another.
I love that he trusts me enough to be genuine with me. To be open with me like this.
That he trusts me enough that he instinctually calls for me when he’s sad…
I feel a light smile grace my lips, an attempt to convey to my human just how happy I am.
I am where I belong.
I love my human, my human loves me…
I hope that we can spend the rest of our days like this, experiencing this joy, this love of life, to the end of our days…

This is my first and possibly only post, but I wanted to share my story. I have a handful of mental health issues that in high school I didn’t know how to cope with. One day, my friends caught me with a binder spine that I had ripped out and bent to the point it snapped in half. I used the sharp edges to cut myself. It wasn’t very deep given the tool I was using, but it was self harm nonetheless. I had a history of self harm since middle school so this wasn’t new for me.
When my friends saw what I was doing, they all but dragged me to the school counselor. I didn’t want to, but I told the woman, let’s call her Ms. Smith, that I was cutting myself and pulled the broken binder spine from my purse to show her what I was using. I didn’t want her to take it away since it was my (very unhealthy) comfort. Deep down though I wanted help. I knew what I was doing was bad and I needed to stop. To my shock and horror, she didn’t care. She just talked to me and asked why I did it. I gave a basic answer: I wanted to.
The reality I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with this stranger was that I needed the release. Seeing the blood coming out of me when I cut myself with anything felt like all the emotions I couldn’t get out was released. I didn’t think it would make sense to anyone so I never told them. Thinking back on it, I’m glad I never told Ms. Smith.
After talking for a few minutes, in which I also told her I was having a lot of suicidal thoughts, she asked me if I was ready to go back to class. It felt like a punch to the gut. She didn’t care that I was hurting myself. She didn’t try to take away the tool I was using. She just wanted me to focus on school and leave her alone. This made me loose so much faith in people who were supposed to be there to help. I felt like I couldn’t trust anyone to help me. I didn’t want to stop, but I also really did if that makes sense.
I told Ms. Smith that no, I wasn’t ready. I wanted to kill myself. I wanted to die. Why didn’t she care? Did no one care about me? But all I told her was no. She called my parents, but only my dad was available to pick me up. She gave dad the run down of what we talked about before we went home. Dad wanted to stay there and talk to me about it all, but I was hurting too much from how Ms. Smith handled it all to really open up to dad. Instead, I just got angry with him and my mom and at the world. I was angry with my friends for making me go there.
Eventually dad took me home. He told mom about it all and she practically shut down. I later learned she had called her therapist and asked what the heck she should do. Her therapist told her to keep an eye on me and if I brought up suicide again to take me to the hospital. Instead of comforting me and trying to help, my parents made me do manual labor. They said if I was going to skip school I was going to work instead. At the time, they were hurting so much that their daughter was in such a dark place that they handled it all in a way they shouldn’t have and I know now how much they regret that.
I was forced to dig a fire pit in the back yard and I hated every second of that. We were already going to have one there and it became my job to dig it when I was feeling suicidal. After school got out, my then boyfriend called to ask where I had gone. He was a crap boyfriend. While I was on the phone with him, I had also moved on to helping mom sort out the costumes in the basement. I was ignoring mom but talking loudly enough for her to hear. I told my then boyfriend all about how my parents didn’t care and that they just wanted me to do work when I was feeling suicidal. That almost broke mom. She and dad were doing the best they knew how and lo and behold I mentioned suicide again. Mom told dad to get ready, they were taking me to the hospital. My then boyfriend told me to lock myself in the bathroom so they couldn’t take me. I did for a bit but eventually came out. I had given up. We all got in the car and dad told mom to sit in the back seat with me so I couldn’t try to hurt him. It’s been years since then and that memory still breaks my heart. I was angry with them but I would never hurt my parents.
That day was the first time I had ever seen my dad cry. He isn’t a very emotional person, so seeing that hurt worse than everything else I was feeling.
We drove to the ER and they checked me in. Eventually I was taken back to a room where a nurse asked me all sorts of questions about what was going on. I wish I had lied. I wish I had told the nurse I was fine. But no, I made the stupid mistake of being honest. He told my parents I needed to go to a “behavioral institution” which let’s be real, is a mental hospital. The only one with available beds was three hours away. Mom looked the place up to see what it was like and voiced her concerns on how terrible the reviews were. Years later when we talked about it she told me she wished she had put her foot down and told them no. Their daughter wasn’t going to go there.
The hospital staff brought me paper scrubs to change into. Paper. Freaking. Scrubs. All I could keep on was my underwear. No bra, just underwear and paper scrubs. It was humiliating on top of everything else. I had to be driven to the mental hospital in the back of a police car with my parents following behind.
The officer was as nice as can be, asking what I wanted to listen to on the radio and if the temperature was okay. I told him all of it was fine and spent the whole three hours silently sobbing. When we finally arrived at the nut house it was late at night. All the other crazy people were asleep. A nurse offered me a sad ham sandwich and a diet ginger ale for dinner. To this day I cannot drink that because of the association with that place.
My parents gave me a tearful goodbye and told me they love me. I couldn’t say it back. I couldn’t speak at all. I was taken to a room with another girl already asleep, and told we would all be woken up at 6am to have our vitals checked. I’m not a morning person at all. More like a perpetually exhausted chicken. That news was just another thing on top of everything else that made the day the worst of my life.
I could barely sleep that night. There was a security camera in the room watching me and my roommate. I still have a fear of security cameras due to that red cyclops eye always monitoring me. There was a small bathroom in the room with a thin sheet for “privacy.” The camera was aimed in a way they could see our silhouette as we showered and used the toilet. I understand the need for keeping an eye on all of us since we were all there for mental issues, but it was still awful to suffer through.
This mental hospital had a thing called “drop anchor.” That meant the residents did something to get in trouble, and the punishment was everyone had to stay in their rooms unless it was time to eat or have group therapy. It was both torture and a blessing. When I arrived, they were a few days into drop anchor, so I stayed in my room like the rest. A nurse told me since I wasn’t in trouble I didn’t have to do that, but it was better than being alone in the mentally messed up adolescence wing lobby.
I made it a few days without having to interact with more than my roommate before drop anchor was lifted. We were forced to go to the gym and participate in sports and meditation, group therapy, and meeting with a doctor. None of us were allowed to sit too close to each other or, Heaven forbid, touch. No hugs or even a pat on the shoulder. We couldn’t even have our legs up while sitting in a chair. There were so many rules that it was a prison more than a place to help people who were in such a dark place we needed to escape from the world to get help.
We even had scheduled bathroom breaks there. I couldn’t make it to the bathroom break one day and begged the nurse to unlock my door so I could go but was told to wait. It got to the point where it was painful to hold it in. I was sweating and almost in tears trying to hold it in. Finally, twenty minutes before the bathroom break, they gave up trying to keep me from peeing and let me go to my room. I didn’t make it and peed just a foot away from the bathroom. The security camera saw it all and whoever was monitoring the footage did too. Humiliation stacked on to misery. I had to change and clean myself off as best I could with toilet paper since our shower supplies was locked away. When I came out, the nurses acted like I should be beyond thankful they let me go early. I could have strangled them.
We were given visitors day and my parents came to see me. I was still angry with them for sending me there. They both looked so relieved to see me and heartbroken that I was at a mental hospital. I remember shouting at them that they locked me in there and storming away. That’s a regret I still haven’t forgiven myself for, though I am trying.
I lied my way out. Each day we were told to fill out a sheet of how we were feeling mentally and if we had any thoughts of hurting ourselves or others. No, of course I don’t want to hurt myself. I’m perfectly fine. All cured. A week locked away made my mental issues so much better. If I had been honest I would have been kept there longer, so I lied my butt off to be free.
There was a very small library there. I borrowed a book about Hellen Keller that I remembered reading in middle school. That book kept me sane. I read it as often as I could, escaping into the story. One day, a nurse came to the lobby to tell us something or other, and told me to put my book away. I kept it open but set it down to keep my place. She yelled at me and told me they would take it away if I didn’t put it away fully. That book was my comfort, and this woman wanted to take it away from me. I saw red. I wanted to scream and shout and throw the book at her. But I knew I had to escape, so I did what she said.
It may sound dramatic, saying I wanted to escape. If you had been there you would understand. That place was terrible for everyone. It was a place to lock kids up instead of trying to help us heal. It was Hell.
Mom told the whole family that I was in there and the letters poured in. There was so much love and support that I was overwhelmed. I kept every single thing they wrote me. Even extended family that I wasn’t very close to wrote to me. When I’m in a dark place I go back and read those letters and it reminds me of the good in my life.
The whole experience, from the moment I was dragged to the guidance counselor to the moment I was checked out of the nut house, was awful. For years I couldn’t even talk about it. I couldn’t say the name of the place without having a severe anxiety attack. It took a lot of therapy to finally talk about it. When I passed police officers on the road anxiety set in, even though the officer who drove me there was kind. Security cameras still freak me out. So much of my life was affected because of that week.
When I finally came home I felt like a stranger. One week away in a mental hospital and I was the family outcast. Everything was different and so hard. I should have been thrilled to be home, but it was almost as bad as the nut house.
I’ve forgiven my parents for taking me there, though. I know they were doing the best they knew how to do, and they’ve sincerely apologized for it all. They felt awful for it too. It took a while for all of us to heal, but we eventually did. At least I can look back on that time when I’m in a dark place and remember that if I could survive that I can survive anything.

Hi, everyone.
Little back story:
First, we live in Kentucky. In summer of 2021, me and my then-boyfriend got into an argument because he wanted to take my car for a drive and I didn't want him to because it didn't have insurance. We were working on getting insurance and were close to having the money for it. Then one of us could get a job to catch back up on the bills and have money for that monthly insurance.
He takes the car anyway, saying "I can drive it if I want to, it's mine too." He was the cosigner. So I couldn't say anything. What happens? He wrecks into someone.
Now I've got a civil summons letter in the mail saying I, as the owner, am responsible for paying damages and court fees. $9,915 vehicle damages and $735.31 in court fees.
He's already been to court over this and paid $500 deductible and around $500 in court fees.
What in the world do I do? I'm still broke, going through college online (that financial aid pays for), have 2 kids and no income, still no vehicle after that one. Living with family. I get my associates this Christmas and was slowly but surely climbing out this hole until I got this letter
The letter says I am the owner and he was just the driver. I thought as he was the cosigner, it was joint ownership? That's why he was able to take it and I couldn't stop him. Or could I have?
What do I do?
ETA: The deductible was what the other person had to pay to their insurance company to get their car fixed. They had my ex pay that. I'm being sued by the insurance company, Farm Bureau.

She was too shy to solicit orders, so I did it for her. Lots of kids at Welch High wanted customized posters to hang on their bedroom walls—of their boyfriend's or girlfriend's name, of their car or their astrological sign or their favorite band. Lori designed the names in big fat overlapping three-dimensional letters like the kind on rock albums, then painted them in Day-Glo colors, outlined in india ink so the letters popped, and surrounded them with stars and dots and squiggly lines that made the letters seem like they were moving. The posters were so good that word of mouth spread, and soon Lori had such a backlog of orders that she was up working until one or two every morning.
What could "letters popped" mean? I'm guessing something like "suddenly show up"

So I (at the moment of this story 18F) was dating my then boyfriend (24M), let’s call him Alex.
Alex and I were together for a couple of months in which we hung out almost every day. This meant i automatically also hung out with his brother, lets call him Brad (27M) and Alex’ best friend, lets call him Colton (25M). About 7 or 8 months into our relationship, Alex got a giant M tattooed on his wrist. When I asked him about it, he tried to tell me he got it for his mom. I didn’t believe him as he’s not close to his parents. So, I began checking his instagram following for people whose names started with the letter M and cross checking it with the people commenting on his photos. I ended up with one name, that of a girl (let’s call her Miranda). I texted her, asking her if she knew Alex personally to which Miranda responded, telling me she’s been dating Alex for almost two years. Beyond mad I let her know he’s been dating me too for the past 7 or 8 months. This resulted in them breaking up as well as me and Alex breaking up.
Letting his girlfriend know about his cheating wasn’t enough, I wanted to get back at him. This is why I started dating his brother, Brad who had been flirting with me ever since we met. This included making out in front of Alex and using his lap as a chair every time Alex was around. Brad and I did this for a couple of weeks before breaking things off and with Brad’s ‘blessing’ I began dating their best friend Colton. Colton and I ended up being together for over a year and goddess, seeing Alex’ face every time we were together made me gloat.
So, AITA for dating my ex’s brother and best friend?
(SIDE NOTE: both Brad and Colton knew about the entire situation with Alex and were entirely on board!)