I (29F) and husband (32M) have been together for five years. He's the love of my life: attentive, empathic, proactive, intelligent, funny, caring, interesting, and much more. I still cannot believe someone like him exists. He deserves the best in the world. I've always been a hopeless romantic and very affectionate to people in my life. I've always given more than I've received (emotionally, materialisticly and physically) and was fine with that, because it is in my nature.
Well, when I met my husband, he was the first person who matched my vibe. He was even worse than me which I had to learn to accept in the beggining because it was all new to me. I still have a lot of trouble not feeling discomfort or appreciating his gestures. Nonetheless, he made me feel seen, loved, and I've experienced and got things I could have never imagined. I knew he was the one for me, I've never doubted that and I still don't. If anything, I feel like I am lacking and the lesser one in the relationship.
I feel ashamed, disappointed, and dumb. Somehow along the way, I've started feeling smothered by the things I appreciated so much before. I feel like I have lost myself, the affectionate person I was. The best way I can describe it is there is no need to anymore, since he does all the work.
As background, I think I show my love in gifts, gestures and acts of services: buying him flowers and a cake when he comes back home after leaving for a while, or buying him something he wanted for a while, or something that made me think of him, writing him a heartfelt specific message about what I love about him, preparing a special night, cleaning the house before he gets home after a long shift/when he's busier, or making a new three services meal just because. I've never doubted that my mom loved me because of all the gestures and help she gave me. She didn't need to tell me she loved me constantly or give me physical affection, because I already knew. Therefore, those are not my automatism and I've had to learn to incorporate them inside our everyday life, even if they don't mean much to me. As far as I've known, words and closeness can just be a facade and the formers demand more thinking and personnalization (not bashing anyone who prioritize those love languages, just trying to explain how they make me feel on a personnal level).
I know the next paragraph is a lot of people's dream, and these "bad" scenarios even sound silly to me. Boohoo, my significant other loves me, but I feel confused about these new feelings. For examples: he always wants to be with me. He loves me very deeply and lets me know he does by telling me multiple times a day. He always compliments me, even in front of others, but I don't appreciate PDA. He wants to hug me when he comes back home or I do, but I often feel overstimulated/overwhelmed. He wants me to aknowledge everything he says or do, and finds it odd how silent I am. He uses my slangs, eats what I eat, do what I do. He wants to know how my day was, and he most of all never wants to disappoint me in any way. This means asking me if I want a spoon or fork with a meal, in a bowl or a plate, to eat at the table or on the couch, if I want water or if I'm good. Asking me if the food is good the second I put it in my mouth. He also has terrible earing which means I have to repeat my answers a lot. This has the exact opposite effect of what he's trying to achieve, because it is all these questions that makes me annoyed.
I do get writing this that it's a toxic cycle: he tries to gain my affection, it ends up doing the opposite, he doubles down, and so on and so forth.
As far as what I've tried: I do ask for time alone, but feel it breaks his heart everytime. He feels rejected and I know it. I've tried to explain to him my feelings, but for him it is foreing. He thinks it's a lack of love on my part, that I don't like him as a person...
I now do get short-tempered and annoyed. Something as simple as kissing my head makes me want to move my head so he can't reach it. I hate myself. I hate what I have become, and I need therapy ASAP before it ruins a good marriage.

Hey all,
I'm 36m with a 43f ex and we share a daughter. We've been on and off for years. When dd was 2 weeks old she made me pick up our daughter after work saying she no longer wanted her, shortly after I bought a house. After this she started having money problems so she came to live with me on and off for around 6 years. During this time I supported her financially, helped her with her various medical issues, we celebrated everything together, everything was pretty normal.
For a few months maybe 3 or 4 years ago she did move away and stopped contact between me and dd, so I took her to court and got custody due to being more stable, after that she had more issues and came to live with us again, and again for years things were normal.
A few months ago she transferred flats to my area and things start to change. One week shes play fighting and grinding on me, the next she wont even look at me, I figure maybe its due to her medication, but today she seemed different somehow. I asked her why and she texted me back saying that things change, I asked what changed, she said she'd found someone new (a 28y/o guy).
After years of trying my best this just sent me on a downward spiral, I cut contact temporarily I got curious, I checked social media and found they worked together before and been "facebok official" for months. This sent me crazy and I said some pretty hurtful stuff, then dd came home from her day out I asked if she knew, she knew tons but mummy said to keep it secret.
Her mother claims to be in a single occupant house and gets benefits for this and disability, and again my gut told me to check where he lives, same street, possibly the same house, no wonder her benefit mail was coming to my house!. My daughters been staying in a house with (or belonging to) her moms bf of 3 months. She also often says shes ill so she cant have our daughter a lot, even having her other daughter bring ours back last week due to pain.
I have no idea where to go from here, I've now I've told her I cant deal with her, heart-broken, feel betrayed and honestly dont know how to continue, I need help but in the mean-time I know my kid needs her mom, even if she doesnt see her much as it is, I just can't face the situation anymore, cant handle the lies, seeing her face, the thought of my kid being told to keep secrets from me, the idea of her staying in some randomers house (2 of her exes have been in trouble for SA), I dont know what to do, honestly I said some really nasty stuff calling out her lies and calling her names, then I blocked her number, sent her new fling a message showing her talking about us being "touchy feely" a few weeks ago, said good luck, then blocked him too.
I dont have anyone to talk to about it all so advice would be awesome, but Am I a bad parent? Also if you made it this far, tysm for reading.

I’m 23F and I started working on a farm about a week ago. Most of my job experience in the past has been on farms/ranches. I have four coworkers here, two guys and two other girls, and we all are undergrads at the local university. I have always had a difficult time fitting in. I know that I’m a little socially awkward, and have been described as “uncanny valley”. However, I am also pretty and go for the “Barbie” look. I feel that this combo catches people off guard and makes them uncomfortable. So I put a lot of conscious effort into being very polite and friendly and not weird, and I am pretty good at small talk. One of my coworkers is my good friend and started at about the same time as me. He does not experience the same issues at our job that I do. No one at work seems to like me, while they took to him very quickly. On my first day, I got put with the two other girls. After we did a couple of chores, they drove the work vehicle around and parked behind different barns and scrolled on their phones for the rest of the day. I do not like getting in trouble, so this made me a little anxious because it felt like we should be doing something, but I just went with the flow. The next day was when things took a turn. I was leaving to get breakfast and asked the guys if they wanted anything (the girls had already left). I brought them back the food they requested and they never ate it. I don’t have a lot of money so it kind of stung but I let it slide without mentioning it. We were having a work lunch, and I was put in charge of a side dish. I started prepping it and the girls walked in and made a snarky comment telling me that I was doing it wrong (I was literally just cutting vegetables) and then snickered amongst themselves. I had never seen it made a different way but I thought maybe I was wrong so I googled recipes and they all looked like how I did it. Once they started putting things together, they told me we wouldn’t have enough of an ingredient because I made the side dish wrong. I immediately went into people-pleasing mode and said I’d go back to the store and get more. When I got back, they were sitting in the office and just stared at me when I set it on the counter, and they didn’t even end up using the extra. At this point I’d spent ~50 bucks on food. I tried to just act normal and friendly but everyone was kind of ignoring me and I felt awkward so I just went off by myself and didn’t eat. I tried not to make a big deal about it or act like I was in a bad mood, I just said “I’m fine, thank you though!” when my manager poked his head out to ask if I was eating. I kind of realized at that point that these girls probably didn’t like me, but I wasn’t sure of everyone else. Since then, I feel like the two girls I work with hate my guts, and the other guy just doesn’t care. These are a few things that have happened so far -we were moving some cattle. One of the girls and I were standing at one end of the alley where our boss told us to go. I guess she wanted to go help everyone else or something, but she told me to give her my flag. I didn’t really want to so I kind of just stood there and didn’t say anything. She grabbed it out of my hand. They were wild cattle to begin with but one calf was giving us some trouble and kept getting past us and running into the pen. At one point it ran past one of the guys and he just grabbed it and started trying to walk it out of the pen, which was pretty hilarious. Him and the other guy had a good hold of him, so I walked over to take a little video. When the girl saw me coming, she ran over to the calf and grabbed it and snapped at me “Can you help us instead of taking a video!?” I genuinely didn’t feel like it would take four people to hold a calf and by that point they were basically out of the pen and closing the gate anyways. Regardless, her condescending comment in front of everyone made me feel really embarrassed and I apologized. -After that, we went to do some chores. Everyone except her got out of the vehicle to work and she stayed sitting in there and played on her phone. -all of my coworkers speak Spanish but I don’t speak it very well. I feel left out when we’re all in a group but they only speak Spanish so I can’t join in the conversation -my boss has been showing me how to run the tractors and such. Every time he’s teaching me, the girls drive up and watch from their vehicle and I can see them laughing. They’ve been here several months now though and neither of them have learned to operate equipment so idk -I am not working with the girls so much now because my boss has been having the more experienced guy show me stuff. He is very monotone with me but I think that’s just his personality. Except I do see him talking and laughing with the other girls but I guess he knows them better. I tried to be friendly with him but he didn’t bite. -When I do work with the girls, if I ask for clarification on something, they just go “Um…giggle.” Or roll their eyes and sigh -Today, all five of us were in the shop. We needed to go tend to something. I was trying to get into the vehicle (they could see me, it was an open side by side) and they backed up and drove away. It was too far to walk so I just sat there, waiting. -They never came back. It turned out that they were all hanging out elsewhere until work was done. When that time rolled around, I wanted to check that everything was in order and I was good to go. No one ever came back to where I was and everyone had gone home without saying anything. -Every time I walk up to join the conversation, they all show negative body language: turning their backs to me, not making eye contact, etc. -I generally just feel like I’m not in the loop. They never really tell me what we’re doing or they just start walking off without me. Everyone else seems to know what’s going on, including the other new person.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me. My boss seems to like me fine and I often ride around with him and help him do stuff. The owner of the cattle we’re feeding came up to introduce himself to me and we had a nice chat. My professors are fond of me. My landlord, who I work for also, says she appreciates my help and she’s glad she has someone responsible around. I don’t understand why people in my age group don’t like me. I used to work at Hooter’s and it was a very similar vibe, I quit because my coworkers just couldn’t stand me. Am I doing something wrong? I know I shouldn’t worry about what other people thing, but deep down I am still a lonely little girl who just wants to be liked and have friends. I grew up in a very rural area without a lot of other kids around, and I’ve always felt like an outsider in friend groups. Sorry everyone for the rant. I just feel very alone in the world at the moment. I’m older than the average college freshman and don’t really relate to most people at school, I don’t see my parents much, and I live alone. I love my job but it’s mentally exhausting trying to get my coworkers to not hate me. They don’t have to like me, but people acting like I’m stupid and actively excluding me hurts my feelings. It’s like everyone can tell that there’s something off or weird about me but I don’t know what. I can do my job perfectly fine but the social interactions are incredibly difficult.
I am not a pick me or a kiss ass or anything like that. I just want to get along with everybody and I genuinely like working hard and helping.

I've read people's opinion on it and why it makes sense vs the one's who don't like it. Watched gameplay from different people. played multiple games with this rework trying out different strategys. No matter what is going on it's just awful to play. I genuinely don't see why they did this and most of the people who like it can't even explain why. Most just like it because it's a (new) support because it's a support without caring about the character. Others want it to happen whether because they hate going against Moji or the low pickrate excuse even though kinnesa and strix exist. So like the other actual Moji mains or people who know how she operates and her history. I'm going to explain everything wrong with this rework and why it shouldn't happen.

Spit & Sparkle

I have multiple problems with this change. Let's start with the fact that sparkle now self slows you for 20% when used. It used to be 10% which was one of the main issues that we wanted to be removed but kept it now it's at 20%. So now Moji has a ball and chain on her and anyone with extra speed will outrun Moji's heals and damage. Thought supports was supposed to stay with the team. Not have a hard time keeping up with them. No wonder Moji she tells Po-Li to go faster. In order to do it you have to stop healing, then heal, and do it again which means you have less healing. Unless of course they're glued to the point which won't happen in most cases since people have to constantly move in different areas because of what's happening.
Also when it comes to attacking and running away you might as well stay still. Where are you going while being self slowed for 20% while having a big hurtbox? Everyone in this sub just forgot about her big hurtbox which makes Fighting even more of a issue. Even if you use morning breath which takes off 4% of self slow. You still have the big hurtbox issue and less options for better cards which most of them suck that I'll slightly explain later as well. Self slow should be gone in general. It should have never stayed especially when they decided to remove it for everyone else.
Second issue is her damage. There was a reason why she did 1,000 damage and not 450. Not only that but they removed her ability to mark enemies by default. You can with a talent but I'll get to that later. Spit does the main damage and now sparkle does limited tickle damage which also means you're wasting your heals. Who thought this made sense in the slightest. You have to use that in order to kill your enemies faster. When your done you have to wait for it to refill to attack the next enemy coming when no one else comes to help making you helpless. Or you somehow kill the enemy because it's hard to do unless low health. You have to use the rest of it to heal your team which you won't have enough of. This is painful to use.
Third issue is it has heal ammo like IO that runs out quick. Yes you can mark your team but it still isn't enough and doesn't fix the main problems. Her main healing is short range. Name one healer in the game that has a short range in healing. They also have to manually heal with sparkle which other manual healers especially auto or assisted aim healers can do way better. God forbid if they have to come back into battle and try to heal a low health teammate with spit which you will miss multiple times. So what's the point of healing with this character. Moving on to Magic Shield

Magic Shield

This ability doesn't do much for her team or herself and she should have kept magic barrier. This ability feels like a worse version of Torvalds removed talent alternating current. Instead of delaying your death by 1.5 seconds you delay it by one attack and take the next few shots before being able to run away. The only possible use of it is a niche build and team where you run with a flank while having the card harmonious. With the card you are basically a walking dispenser that shoots with the flank you will hug through most of the game. We already have enough niche things that can be pretty boring and are hardly used. Torvalds had multiple of those. Moji doesn't need it too.

Scamper

You can now run indefinitely with it. They removed bunny hopping but then they brought it back when they realized that she was a literal bunny. When they brought it back though they nerfed the speed and the bunny hops. It's so noticeable that it's not any different from the scamper ability when it comes to speed. The only good thing about it is when you do the advanced tech when trying to spray. That is until that 20% self slow puts a ball and chain on you. This doesn't fix her main issues and they made it worse beilieve it or not. Here's there reason on doing it.
Due to changes to how Scamper functions, Bunny Hopping will be weaker at base than it was prior. In order to feel similar to how it did on Moji prior, you'll want high levels of both Boop and Morning Breath to allow those same flings across spaces.
This is completely wrong because when did we ever had a card that decreases self slow. Your really trying to tell me that Moji players, grandmaster Moji players, and bot Moji didn't know anything about it??? Guess it was hidden in the game the whole time. Plus it doesn't even change the speed of bunny hopping because you nerfed it and nothing in her cards effects it. So in order to maintain any kind of speed I have to put points into morning breath which is pretty a forced have too in game. Also who uses boop to increase the speed after using scamper. No one used it because bunny hopping was way better than that because you're able to move while attacking and defending yourself. Anyone running it was basically throwing without knowing. Not even maxing out scoot will save you. Your just delaying your death with that maxed out 20% damage reduction and giving them more ult. Seriously if using regular scamper made you die when trying to escape. What's making it indefinitely going to do?

Bon Appetite

This one really amazes me because they actually put part of yummy into base kit that we asked for halve what. Except there is no ult percentage and gives 50% of maximum health instead of 1000hp and ignores anti-healing. Problem is. This ult is now basically worse than pips ult and atlas setback. They changed everything else but the ultimate in order to keep the old Moji play style that is pretty much dead. They clearly want her to be glued to her team and with this ultimate you make them have to run to the opponent to eat it. The main use now for it is to use it for defence which is horrible because it's so easy to predict it. Most characters can either block, CC immune, dodge, and other things to ignore being ulted. Even with the cancels it won't work. You had a better chance of using it because you can attack regularly, use the magic barrier combo, and other methods to make people take the ultimate. Without magic barrier she less uses for her ultimate. It's now a long charging ability and is terrible. Now for the talents.

Spit Shine

Spit now heals them for 350 and increases their Movement Speed by 20% for 2s. Why is this reworked Moji's only true support talent. This talents fine until you realize that it's also goes against Moji and the team. Let me explain. Remember how Moji has 20% self slow when she fires. Well now that the team is moving at 120% now you're basically moving at 60% and they're outrunning you. Some characters can move even faster and you will basically be at a speed of 40%-60%. So if you felt forced using morning breath you will using this talent and have to make it 5 points. Even with morning breath maxed out. You will be moving at 60%-80% and will be forced to use scamper and may get attacked by a enemy and can't run or hurt them enough. You're just a bad assist healer with some use that is not enough.

Jubilation

Reworked to "Magic Marks are now instead applied to enemies. Detonating at least 7 stacks of Magic Mark deals bonus damage, up to a total of 800". I'm aware that she is a support but they still don't know why she did 1,000 damage in the first place. With this talent you no longer have the ability to use the secondary to heal people. This talent will bring these types of players.
The ones who like old Moji and then realizing that they changed so much that flank Moji is not possible. Instead they may go damage and heal from time to time. Another one is that someone uses it for defence while mainly healing the team and forcing two supports to play in the match. The last one is someone you will see more often is someone not able to play Moji or the talent well. Youthought grohk going damage and seris flanking on the same team was bad. Get ready for her to join the team. Your going to ask them so who is going main support and who will play tank and it's television static. The seris will stand around too much and do a bunch of questionable things. Grohk only has some heals because they were there when they played damage. The Moji is struggling to do anything with it. The seris will plug and the bad grohk player will say something crazy before leaving a millisecond later.
No matter what you do with the talent based on your skill. Nothing just works for reworked Moji including the cards. The damaged worked because she had magic barrier and damage combos with it. Without it she can't do anything when she's is in danger including running away with the giant hurtbox.

Realm Runner

When entering Scamper, leave a magical dust cloud behind that applies a lingering heal for 600 over 3s. Dust cloud lasts 4s.
Moji mains have been wanting toot I mean realm runner in base kit for awhile because it's not a real talent. It's a better version of scurry and when it's in base kit then she would actually be able to use the other two talents and do better without ruining gameplay for anyone. Instead they kept it as a talent to play the old Moji. What old Moji...you got rid of almost everything Moji who is basically just a echo champion at this rate. You turned a forced talent into a throw talent.
The dust cloud we wanted back is just a sparkly circle on the ground that people won't be able to see. Plus is like back then where the team can see it and no one else. Otherwise people will know where she is and take her down. Why.

Cards

None of the cards have any synergy with each other at all. You're basically forced to use morning especially with the healing talent at 3-5. Since default ammunition for sparkle is terrible you will definitely need 3-5 points for symbiotic. Dense woods never needed any points above 1 and was a decent filler card for old Moji. However since this is reworked Moji. Don't think it's worth using since you will try to be around the team constantly and should already be enough. Now we have 5-9 points for ourselves so what can we do. Uhhhh. Well damn.
Oh I didn't mention this earlier but remember how spit shine and Moji's 20% self slow makes the team run away from her. Well the card natures blessing gives allies 5% extra speed when they get hit by spray for 3 seconds. So you can max this out at 25%. Instead of being 40-60% slower than faster teammates being healed with there speed cards and abilitys. 60% slower when trying to healer teammates without anything making them move faster besides you. This is how fast you will be moving compared to them.
You will be moving at 15% at worst to 55% when trying to heal teammates while trying to heal them as they really outrun your heals. With morning breath maxed out you will mainly be moving at 35%-75% while healing. No one has tested this character at all.
Anyway you can look at the cards and get some ideas as we move on to the long time Moji bugs. So for the people who been playing Moji or about to with support Moji. Get ready to deal with these long time annoying bugs.

Weapons/Armor

Fluffy Increase your maximum Health by {5050}.
Peppy Generate {0.40.4}% Ultimate Charge when triggering a max stack Magic Mark.
Symbiotic Increase your Sparkle capacity by {66}%.
Will-o-the-Wisp Increase your Movement Speed by {55}% for 4s after getting an Elimination.

Sparkle

Dense Woods Increase the duration of your Magic Marks by {0.80.8}s.
Greater Good When an ally receives max Magic Marks, they gain a {2020} Health Shield while marked.
Morning Breath Reworked to "Decrease self-slow of Sparkle by 2020%"
Nature’s Blessing Allies gain {55}% Movement Speed for 3s after being hit by Familiar Spray.

Magic Shield

Cozy Magic Shield Heals allies for {66} every 0.25s while its being channeled.
Glimmer Reduce Magic Shield’s Cooldown by {0.10.1}s when detonating a max stack Magic Mark.
Harmonious Regenerate {31}% Sparkle and Ammo for affected allies every 0.25s while channeling Magic Barrier.
Shimmering Allies affected by Magic Barrier gain {33}% Crowd Control resistance for 4s.

Scamper

Boop Increase your Movement Speed by {88}% for 2s after using Scamper.
Scoot Reduce the damage you take during Scamper by {44}%.
Scurry Heal for {2020} every 0.3s during Scamper.
Wobbles Gain {1010}% Slow resistance while using Scamper.

The Bugs

It isn't a paladins games without mentioning the bugs. Here's what to expect when playing her so you don't get confused.
If a seris or Kasumi is on the team and attack the same enemy as you. Your marks will reset back to zero everytime they attack. Now can this somehow happen when trying to heal the same teammates. No idea but anything goes with paladins.
If you mark a enemy, shoot spit at them and die. Despite the mark being there the game will for some reason make you do zero mark damage.
A enemys hurtbox when turned into a cookie is really weird. You can touch them multiple times and still won't be eaten until they finally do. Sometimes they may turn back to normal even though you clearly deserved it. Last part hasn't happened to me and I hope it doesn't. What's even weirder is that even though you can't eat them from the front from time to time. Even when they're literally on your head and jumping around. You can definitely eat them from behind with no misses. Why has this not been fixed.
When being ulted by furia that's supposed to give 30% extra damage. You will instead receive 9% extra damage. I don't think this happens to no one else besides maybe jenos too.
These bugs are still relevant for reworked Moji. The other ones are not there like snack attack so I won't mention them. I even have videos for these bugs too. Don't think because these videos are old it means that it no longer happens. The horse bug is old and that has been going on for years including other things.
https://www.reddit.com/Paladins/comments/tvfhlg/a_video_of_multiple_moji_bugs_happening_ill/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
https://www.reddit.com/Paladins/comments/z33w1x/yeah_that_makes_sense/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

Conclusin

I know they want to do something with her but I don't buy it that they did this because they cared about Moji. Moji hardly got any changes for years and I mean rarely a update to anything about her even though we're telling them what to do and then they rework them. They did thid because they didn't have funds for a echo champion since that was mentioned in the exact same post when talking about changing moji. Paladins has a history of someone who works on the game saying they will do this or mention a thing. Whether or not people like it or not which most of them we didn't like. They will still do it like echo champions.
This is the wrong way to go about it and no warning was ever given. To people who think well people ask for support/tank in the past. Those people now see that Moji is actually better than how people depicted her in late season 2. Plus those people no longer play the game and had a whole different idea when paladins was different back then. It's one thing to say I want a support. It's another when it comes to a type of support and what they have but everyone can't explain it because they simply hate Moji based on the comments. There are some characters I hate going against and when there character gets gutted I don't cheer in excitement. I would hate that to happen to my favorite characters. I simply want a certain thing nerf if it's clearly too much but without ruining them. I only suggest a rework or change to a certain thing if nothing else can work and is something people can agree on that benefits everyone.
These changes don't benefit anyone including the ideas since no one asked for these specific things. I would just revert it and actually listen to Moji mains needs to make her a better character. Not just Moji but every character. Especially the non human characters because they stay ignore them including people wanting ruckus Aerial Assault in base kit. Rather you guys fix the actual issues than do stuff like this. Including finishing unfinished maps instead of a unnecessary map rework making them worse to play on and never fixed.
That's all I have to say. Please let me know your thoughts on this. Actually have a real opinion and thoughts and not repeat the same thing over and over without making a actual point or I'm ignoring it.

While I sit listening to a meeting at work my mind began to wonder about common issues faced with common MMO systems and balancing. Things like PvP and equipment balancing, I don't promise a eloquently written post, but I will try my best to explain the ideas I want to get across.
PVP: I don't intend to address social issues directly like zerg/mob mentality as you can't fully resolve such a thing and probably shouldn't as those instances also are part of that emergent gameplay moments PvP players love to tell tales of when group pvp turned to massive guild v guild wars. My issue and one I see a lot is when you try to mix pvp and pve as those players are fundamentally looking for two very different things within the same game.
Ofcourse the option for Toggle pvp has been presented and tried with MMOs like New World , but of course for the most part most players didnt toggle. Now I wish to propose a open pvp system with actual consequences for excessive pvp. NPC guards should petrol and auto aggro a player that gets flagged for aggressive pvp(Initiated the conflict) these guards should be strong to the point where it should require a decently geared max level player is required to potentially beat them.
Of course this will add to a karma system having thresholds depending on how many instances of guard killing or player killing have occurred. Players part of a Neutral or good standing guild will have their karma reported to a officer of said guild, this would hold weight as with this system Guilds will also have a karma system of their own. Guilds with overall negative karma due to aggressive PK will be marked as a Red guild or outlaw guild. This will bar the Guild from receiving full rewards for guild quest but also unlock alternative guild quest that involve pvp or stealing from other guilds in the event of transport missions and such.
These changes would make pvpers be more mindful of setting up duels instead of excessive ganking, now of course that option will be available to them but it will change their gameplay to the point where towns aren't useable for them and would have to complete side quest in the open world to restore karma(repeatable brain numbing kill 50 boars for tusk with a 30% drop rate quest)
Equipment Balancing: Now with this I aim to mostly avoid big number bloat, I'm not too experienced with it but games like Guild Wars 2 avoid this problem I believe with horizontal progression? Now if this is how it's done and I'm just echoing an idea already put into practice then excuse me. So with this I would set a max damage like lets say for argument sake its 200.
Now this 200 can be achieved by a mixture or pure type of damage. Physical could be separated to slashing, pierce, and blunt like usual. Magic can just be magic(pure) or a mix of a element of any type that fits the setting. and of course Monsters, Enemies and player armors will have defense that block certain amounts of each damage. So this avoids weapons becoming obsolete and make it more bringing the right weapon for the right quest/adventure kinda in line to the Monster Hunter mindset?
I'm sorry this isn't as fleshed out as it could be, but I'd like to hear others thoughts on these issues and proposed solutions?

It's been awhile since I've posted anything here, but there have been a few things that have happened over the last month that I just want to vent about.
The week before Mother's day, which was supposed to be my first Mother's day, one of my coworkers referred to me as a Mom "because I have cats." This person is aware that I lost my daughter 5 months ago, but I had to remind him that I am still a mother, even if my baby is no longer here with me.
That same week, another coworker who had a baby during my pregnancy and is of course aware of my loss, told me that she "knows" I overworked myself when I was pregnant. That the reason I lost my baby at 27 weeks was because I was stressing myself out and was working too hard. She is "sure of it." So basically, in her eyes, I am to blame for my daughters passing. WTF? Part of me is trying to give the benefit of the doubt that she doesn't realize what she is saying, but another part of me is like, hello?? Do you hear yourself?? I DID NOT DO THIS TO MY BABY.
Most recently, I went to a walk-in clinic because I have been having intense side/back pain and wanted to make sure I don't have a kidney infection. I was talking to the Dr. and mentioned my recent loss, and within less than two minutes she tells me, "It's just muscle pain, probably from picking up your baby." I was so taken aback. HELLO?? ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?! I would do ANYTHING for that to be the reason. I would do ANYTHING to hold my baby...
I miss my Everlee so freakin much, I just wish she was here...

Summary: Just as you thought you managed to escape, your soon-to-be husband caught you and brought you back to your castle. Even though they keep telling you how much they care for you, you know they’re only after your position as queen. They’ve been willing to do anything to have you… even if it meant using dark magic. You won’t let them get into your head again… right?
Author’s notes:
Hiya! As you might be able to tell this is the first script I’ve ever written. I gave my best and I sincerely hope that you guys enjoy it (; (You may use the script, but don’t forget to give credit). Have fun <3
Notes:
“* … *”: emphasis.
“(…)”: suggested emotions / actions
"[...]": Listener speaking
Script:
(annoyed sigh) Have you calmed down yet?
(Footsteps as Speaker enters the Listener’s room)
Wow… you threw a hell of a tantrum in here. Doesn’t really fit a (princess’s / prince’s / royal’s) behavior now, does it?
[…]
My fault? Oh please. You can’t even acknowledge your own mistakes.
[…]
Yes, I did lock you up in here. However, I don’t recall telling you to smash and or destroy everything in this room. (sarcastic) But what do I know? You know everything so so much better than me, don’t you?
[…]
(amused) Of course, you sound like that. You refuse to see that even you need help from time to time… (mumbling to himself, a bit too loud) probably more than most of us do…
[…]
(quickly hiding amusement; acting more caring) Stupid? No, no… don’t put words in my mouth like that, honeybun. I never called you stupid. I would rather say you’re… misguided… and in need of help. That’s what I am here for. It’s what I was always meant to do. To help and protect you. To stand by your side. And, therefore, it is your fate to stand by mine.
[…]
(sigh) Oh, honeybun… my sweet sweet honeybun. I know that all of this must be quite hard on you. I mean, as a (princess / prince / royal) you must have a lot on your plate. Trust me, I get it. I’d be the last person to judge you for it.
And I also get that your top priority is your kingdom… and your people. That’s the reason why you need me to help you out. All this stress is making you… short-sighted. You try anything and everything to make your people happy. You’re completely disregarding your own personal needs.
Look at you! I can see those heavy bags under your eyes. (softly spoken) God… you’re practically working yourself to death at this point.
[…]
(a bit more agitated) Just… just think about it for a moment. You and I could be king and queen of this kingdom. I could remove all of your stress. All you need to do is let me in. Let me in just like you did when we first got to know each other.
[…]
Look at me, honeybun.
[…]
(angry, yet trying to be subtle) Look. At. Me.
[…]
(content sigh) There you go. That wasn’t so hard, was it? Now, just relax. Take some deep breaths for me. You remember this, don’t you?
[…]
Yes. Yes, you do. Of course you do. How could you forget how good this makes you feel? How could you forget how good I make you feel? How good it feels to just let yourself fall into that state of pure relaxation.
How easy it is to listen to my voice and stare into my eyes as you slowly let go of your mind. How good it feels to hand over all the complicated thinking to me… leaving you all blank and empty.
That feeling… that bliss… that pure bliss and carefreeness is all you want… it’s all you’ll ever need. And you know who can make you feel all those lovely feelings, don’t you?
[…]
Say it. Say it for me.
[…]
Good. Very good.
(evil chuckle)
All you want is me. All you need is me. I make you happy. And if you are happy then so are your people. Once we get wed, I’ll…
(Small pause, as if Speaker is weighing their next words)
we’ll make everyone feel like you do right now. And all you’ll have to do is stand by my side, smile and doddle your head for me. Doesn’t that sound perfect?
[…]
Good.
For now, my darling, I think it is time for you to rest. It’s been a long day for us both. Let me just bring you over to your bed.
(brief pause as Speaker carries Listener and places them on their bed)
Here we are… all nice and comfortable. And don’t worry, honeybun. When you wake up, I’ll be right here by your side. And while you get your well-deserved rest I’ll be seeing to get some of the wedding preparations done.
(The Speaker gives the Listener a soft kiss on their forehead)
Good night, my darling. My most precious treasure…
(evil chuckle and footsteps, slowly fading out as Speaker leaves)

I recently completed a 4 day dry fast. Physically, I felt fine and I never felt any extreme fatigue. But, this fast was quite different than any other fast I have ever done. Was it because I ate sugar 3 days in a row leading up to this fast. I think that had a lot to do with it. Because I'm doing great on SR. But, the sugar was a lot of dopamine. Beginning on Day 2 the emotional release would get bigger and bigger each day. I did do some intense breathwork. I'm pretty extreme with the breath work and have learned how to transmute a lot of anxiety in a short period. Normally, I don't do intense breath work during the dry fast. But, this time I did. And considering a lot of sugar energy needed to be released. Well, the following transpired.
On day 2 I had some small emotional release not anything that hasn't happened before. On Day 3, things become interesting. I practiced some intense breath work before I went to work. Charging my energy and at the same time pulling up more emotions. The breath work left me feeling intense with energy and highly dominant. I started leading myself right pass fears. The detainees at work refused to comply if they weren't allowed to go to the vending machines. Everyone refused to move when we told them to go to their cells.
We left and had to attend to other business. This was one of those days. I was already sensing the reality manifesting my emotions through this event. We returned and asked the detainees to go to their cells for count time. Normally, we lock all the doors. I spoke to the supervisor about locking this dorm down and not let them out again. Because we would have trouble. She agreed and received authorization to do so. They will stay locked down the whole night. Sure, they were angry. But, we didn't have the manpower to deal with unruly detainees this night.
Thinking I had stopped something bigger from escalating and manifesting further. I relaxed mentally knowing the next day I will move into a higher high mentally and emotionally in the dry fast. Day 4 came, I again did some intense breath work and released a lot of anxiety. I didn't realize how much I was releasing until it was reflected in my reality.
The dorm lock down had ended and the detainees were on good behavior. Four hours into the night we get a frantic call to the same dorm. One detainee is extremely emotional. He's crying, on his knees, he's pretty loud. The whole dorm gets locked down except him. We have in a small room. We get the nurses to come talk to him. He is still crying heavily and throwing his hands to the sky on his knees as he says things in his language. He is unhinged. Unstable. Loud. It's like something out of a movie. He is detained in this facility to be deported soon to his country where his mother has just died.
This is the source of his anguish. I see this is affecting everyone. Everyone sympathizes with this fact. He is speaking with one of the nurses on a translator line. The mental health person is not here tonight who would usually handle something like this. They call her. She should be here soon.
We take the guy do medical which is not a very big area and the sounds echo. He continues to cry and is saying stuff in his language. I understand a few words. He is very loud and being in this area his voice is like a megaphone. He is pacing back and forth. Walking around and continues to fall deeper into his emotional turmoil. There are 3 of us. We are allowing him some space to move given the situation. Though he continues to move in an unpredictable manner and he continues to get louder and angrier until he begins to berate us and bully us even though his words are not understood, but his energy and the body gestures is. I immediately jump up and get right into his face. "That is enough" "Relax", the best I could muster in a weakened voice of the fast. The other 2 and one being the supervisor finally get up out of the seat.
Though weakened from the fast I stand right there inches from him. He's still going on angry at the system, angry at the federal government, angry at us. Now, I'm standing at ready position with my right feet back ready to drive him into the wall. I don't know If I'm going to have to fight this guy or not. He is unpredictable. He stands a few inches taller and a little bigger though he begins to calm down when he sees I'm not backing down. He was getting lost in his own emotions. And if he wasn't stopped I don't know what he would have done. Now, I won't leave his side. I stand there with my presence beside him until the mental nurse finally arrives.
On the 4th day of the dry fast. My emotions are more sensitive, my body, mind, everything more sensitive. I am not fatigued, but weaker. Without the physical power I normally have, the volume of his voice was shooting through me like an EMP pulse wave that disrupted my energy field and I could barely contain myself. My body twitched involuntarily. I had to hold on with every ounce of strength to keep control of my body's involuntary response. Twitching and anxiety. Normally, even the most gravest situations bounce off me like man of steel.
And when looking back. The dry fast combined with the intense breath work in which I intentionally brought out more emotions manifested a greater event. Not like anything I have experienced before on a fast. I released a mountain of those anxiety emotions way too fast.
On Day 4, I was right in the middle of that transition into the higher highs of the fast that really begins accelerating on Day 5. Where I may not have the physical power. But, I have enough spiritual power to combat reality.
He talked with the mental health professional for almost 2 hours. He was much better. Even a few days later I see him and he is better. This was the craziest emotional release I think I've ever experienced.

The last 2 years of my (m 22) life have changed me a lot. I went through a break up that ended in an abortion, I went back to an ex who ultimately broke my heart a second time, I lost a great job due to budget cuts and it took 5 months to find a new one that suited me (love my current job), my grandfather died, I moved into my own place, I began taking online classes, lost a lot of weight after being obese, became an alcoholic then quit drinking (2 months sober rn), quit smoking, and I recognize how much progress I’ve made and all the good things in my life, but lately, I just feel angry all the time.
I grew up poor and overweight, got bullied a lot as a kid, had to learn to take care of myself pretty young, a lot of emotional abuse growing up, and I had this constant feeling of not being enough. This resulted in a lot of insecurity as I grew into my teen years and now as an adult. But I did decide to make changes for the better because I didn’t want to be that person anymore. Losing weight, taking classes, finding a good job, researching politics to be up to date on the current state of things, etc; all things I decided I had to do in order to separate myself from the me that I was, and to be better. But I didn’t realize that it wasn’t just about being a better me, but rather wanting to be better than everyone else.
I don’t live in a wealthy area at all. My place is definitely on the nicer side but it’s mostly section 8 and a lot of homelessness. When I go to the store, I look around and I’m disgusted. I look at the overweight individuals and think “dear god, go to the gym”, I see the homeless and think “get a job, you stupid bum.” Or I see the junkies and think “why do this to yourself? Just stop this nonsense.”. I think this way and then have to ultimately remind myself that it’s not a choice for most of them, and that not everybody can simply change their habits and lifestyle on a whim. But even when I remind myself that life can be cruel and many of these people simply don’t have the resources or knowledge to fix their problems, I still feel so disgusted by them. I feel so disgusted by the idea that I was only a few years away from being one of them. Seeing those people, those strangers who are so similar to family members of my own; it drives me crazy.
I create conflict for the sake of being correct, and I can never seem to admit when I’m wrong until it’s too late. I hate letting emotions overcome my logic (I have autism) and will blatantly ignore someone’s feelings in order to be correct. “The facts don’t care about your feelings” is a phrase that pretty accurately describes my way of discussing important issues. Recently even possibly permanently damaging a friendship because I just had to be right about the Israel and Palestine situation, instead of acknowledging that her perspective was simply her own, and I haven’t even apologized yet because I feel like apologizing means admitting to being wrong (see what I’m saying?!).
I’m so determined to be better than everyone that I become the kind of person that nobody wants around. I can’t just let people be and move along. I have to have an opinion, and I have to be smarter, in better shape, better dressed, etc. I’ve become this pretentious person who looks down on everyone when I’m nothing special myself. I feel like I’m shooting myself in the foot by trying to be more than what I’ve always been surrounded by.

I’m a first year teacher and was promised a lot of support from my school when I was hired. I was given a mentor and a mentor over all beginning teachers to help guide me. I was also placed in a grade with 3 other veteran teachers. I got high marks on my student teaching evaluations as well as glowing recommendation letters from my grade level teachers during student teaching. I also received a Highly Qualified score on my state licensure based on my testing scores.
I was given a classroom full of students who Failed their EOGs from the year before and there are 15% IEP/504 with pull outs during intervention and class time as well as inclusion.
I have had 1 training with the beginning teacher mentor the whole year. My first evaluation with admin I was developing in most categories and was told that I just needed to get proficient and they had no concerns about me getting there. I worked closely with my grade level team to nail down best practices and ensure I was doing the right things in my classroom for my students. I worked closely with SPED all year and ended up co-teaching with them while they were doing inclusion. I saw my dedicated mentor barely once a month, and only when she remembered me.
My second observation with the beginning teacher mentor went good I thought but I was still considered Developing in most categories. When I asked for feedback she suggested about 3 different online programs to put my kids on and said not to keep them on one task more than 15 minutes. So I modified my instruction to do that.
My third and fourth observations were nearly back to back and right after Christmas break. I did what I thought were decent lessons, following directions from everyone I had talked to. I didn’t get a consultation with admin after my third observation before they gave me my fourth, so I had no time to modify anything before they evaluated again. At my meeting for the third observation I was fussed at because I didn’t stop my instruction to teach one-on-one and at the same time had a kid acting out with known behaviors. When I met for my fourth observation, I was told I may not get a renewal for next year.
I also never got observed by my assigned mentor, and she’s the one they wanted me to rely on for help.
I was taken aback and frustrated. I brought up the lack of specifics for what to fix and admin talked around it without going into details of what they were looking for. They told me they’d do another observation and it would determine my placement for next year. This final observation was supposed to be on a Monday or Wednesday since testing would occur later.
No observation came until the day before testing when we were on a modified schedule due to testing in other grade levels. The observation was my kids working independently on review the day before EOGs!!! Every other classroom in the building looked like mine or worse. And still they marked me as Developing on that observation. They knew that day would be like that and still observed.
My summative was posted yesterday and nearly every section is developing. I have a meeting tomorrow to discuss it and I know what they are going to say. I just can’t wrap my head around how they haven’t given me support to improve, how I was given students so far behind and expected to work miracles, and what it is they aren’t getting. I’m literally doing everything I have been taught and everything I can to teach exactly how I’m supposed to. My students have also shown significant growth over the year with nearly all of them now at grade level instead of behind.
I’ve already started looking for other jobs so I’m prepared, but was hoping some veteran teachers might have insight. Or maybe other new teachers have experienced this?

My boyfriend (M42) and I (F32) are in a two year relationship, freshly engaged. Because he’s ideal reaction in moments of disagreement is silence and time for himself and mine is communication and sharing we come to an agreement that when he feels like he needs some time he will give me some reassurance so that I don’t start to overthink the situation - and it worked perfectly until last week.
Last week he shared his frustration about my work (music industry) - he shares his frustration frequently, I mostly agree but love my job. He works in a pretty strict environment, while my work includes people being late, not respecting rules and late payments. In last weeks conversation about the scene and his frustrations I again agreed about most things (unstable work environment) but told him that my happiness comes from a few good minutes and / or hours while I’m on stage and that my goal is sharing good music and energy with others / my audience. He told me he doesn’t understand my point of view and become even more frustrated and confused. We went to sleep.
The next morning he went to work and sent me a pretty cold message telling me that he needs to think about everything. I had a gig that day and had to drive alone to another city (three hour drive). I send him a message asking him if everything is ok he responded me that he doesn’t know and that he doesn’t want to share messages that could be misinterpreted. I asked him if I can share my thoughts and he said yes. The emphasise of the message I sent was that I understand his point of view and respect our differences. In the middle of the message I share that I feel anger because he closed himself and I feel that he discard my opinion. I finish the message with words of love and compassion, telling him how much I love him and asking him for help in my personal and professional world. He doesn’t respond or react.
In the next day we share a couple of good night / good morning messages, he’s still cold and responding with one liners, I’m also keeping it short but use heart and kiss emoji’s. When I came back to our city I messaged him that I’m back and asked him if he would come over, he responded no and said that he’ll also not come tomorrow. At this point I’m shaking, crying and typing, again trying to put out my thoughts in a most respectful way possible. While I’m typing he says he’ll go to sleep (afternoon power nap) and when he woke up he responded me “Is good to see that you respected my wishes.” with a screenshot, sarcastically implying that I didn’t. I respond that he told me that I could share my thoughts, that I wrote that I respect his need for time and I’m giving him time. Wrote again that I’m just sharing my thoughts and that I love him.
His message of reassurance comes hours later and the next day he comes over to my place. He seems kind of angry but we talked. His point of view is that I didn’t respect his wishes and the main point from my messages that come across was that I was angry (and that frustrates him even more). When I share that I was writing those messages putting my pride aside and choosing the most loving words I could find I get the feeling like I’m doing a counter effect so I stop.
When we come to the reassurance (the agreement that we had) part he said that he forgot and thought that I was angry and having a good time (which I was not, I was crying most of the time (even on stage) and driving in a miserable mood). Rereading my messages I still see only love but can understand that in his point of view just the fact that I’ve send them is disrespectful. My friend thinks that his actions are manipulative, I don’t know what to think. I love him so much and like the fact that he’s rigid (I feel like we complement each other), I like his opinions - even those which don’t align with my train of thoughts because he gives me a new perspective, I love talking to him.
It’s hard for me to understand how can I say or feel something so inappropriate (in this case, in his point of view- my goal is senseless and my anger not valid) that makes him rethink everything. Help me to make sense of the situation… Was my messages / the fact that I sent them disrespectful?
More context: At the begging of the relationship he would come to my gigs but as the frustration grow he stopped and started to share more and more hateful comments about my audience, friends and music. Which I understand because we came from two different worlds. What is hard for me to even grasp - I work in that industry and have the same frustrations and now I feel like I have to deal with both his and mine - why I feel like I try to understand and accept everything, while he closes himself off..? Or is my feeling wrong (he also told me that I don’t understand him)? What am I not seeing?
P.S. When I started writing this I didn’t think it would turn out so long. Also, I’m not a native english speaker - so, sorry for both!

Full disclosure: I do not speak Frisian or play guitar. I do not know very much about music theory or linguistics. This is just an observation I have made. If I’m using any terms incorrectly or misunderstanding something, please feel free to let me know.
When I say Frisian, I am referring to West Frisian. I haven’t listened to enough of the other dialects of Frisian to say if it applies to Saterland Frisian and/or North Frisian as well. To a certain extent, what I am saying about West Frisian also applies to Dutch, which has a number of differences from Frisian (fewer vowel sounds, for example) but is closely related to it and has a similar feeling.
When I say “mathy or twinkly emo” I am referring to the more energetic subgenre of midwest emo influenced by math rock and post rock that became more prominent in the late 2000s and early 2010s. Some refer to it as twinkledaddies. However, there is a more specific branch of twinkly emo that I believe shares the same feeling as Frisian. I am not talking about the more glum, atmospheric, and post-rock influenced twinkly emo. Empire! Empire! (I Was a Lonely Estate) and The World is a Beautiful Place and I am No Longer Afraid to Die do NOT sound Frisian.
I think Algernon Cadwallader is the best example of a band whose guitar work sounds like Frisian. I Love Your Lifestyle is a good example too. There’s something about the whimsical energy of these bands that can also be felt in Frisian.
With all of that said, it’s challenging to pinpoint which traits of Frisian and twinkly emo are responsible for this feeling they have in common. Even if we were to say that arpeggios, DAEAC#E tuning, or writing music in this or that key signature, that would not explain why Frisian and this corner of emo are connected.
English is closely related to Frisian and most Midwest emo bands are composed of people whose first language is English. I don’t find this to be a compelling explanation at all though. Countless forms of music have sprung from the Anglosphere that do NOT feel Frisian in the slightest. There are many examples of artists making twinkly emo or music that sounds very similar whose tongues do not descend from Hengist or Horsa. As much as I adore the English language, I don’t think it’s responsible for the similarities between twinkly emo and Frisian. Also, there was that one post about the guy from Uruguay back in the 80s whose guitar playing sounded really similar to today's midwest emo.
In all likelihood, this is a case of cultural convergent evolution. So far, I have not found any evidence that these early emo revival bands were going for a Frisian-inspired sound or have any connection to Frisia. Over the course of centuries, the Frisian language evolved to sound the way it does, and then later on this subgenre of emo independently captured the same feeling as Frisian phonetics. Were similar selective pressures placed on them to mold some deeper essence (what some might refer to as “vibes”) in both Frisian and twinkly emo into twins? There are some things in language and music that may always remain mysteries. The most well known example of convergent evolution is that things keep evolving into crabs/crab-shaped animals. Rather than analogous body shapes, this can be thought of as two separate cultural phenomena (music and language) developing analogous essences. To compare it to the phenomenon of carcinisation, it would be like if a proto-crab evolved into a crab and then a bird evolved into a crab-shaped bird. They are both animals and both crab-shaped but not related.
Perhaps the simplest way of putting it is that the essence of twinkly emo is shaped like how the sound of Frisian is shaped.
So, what do you all make of this? Have you noticed the connection too? Do you have any theories on which traits of West Frisian and the more energetic twinkly emo influenced by math rock their common essence/“vibe”? Do you have any theories on what caused it? Although I am not religious and therefore would find any explanations involving divine guidance or some other supernatural force hard to believe, please do not hesitate to share such theories if that’s what you believe. I always try to keep an open mind. I have no interest in disputing anyone’s faith in a higher power so long as it is not pushing them in the direction of blind hatred, violence toward innocent people, or pacifism in the face of a monstrous enemy. If you believe God played a role in this, I want you to feel comfortable sharing that but I also don’t want a conversation about music and language to turn into a religious debate. Let’s try to keep things on topic and civil.

Good evening to everyone on this sub, I’d like to start off by saying I apologize if I’ve put this in the wrong place, but I feel as though many people here will have much more life experience and wisdom than myself on this topic, so here goes nothing.
P.S. This is going to be long as fuck so I apologize in advance lol.
I’ll start this off by giving a brief profile: I am 17 years old and about to graduate in a few weeks. My last long-term relationship ran from March ‘22-August ‘22 and it was not until about four months ago that I decided I was “over it” (I speculate I may have held limerence towards that person as well). In that time I developed an addiction to weed (daily use started in July-ish) that still runs to this day, for a multitude of different reasons, that relationship included. I’ve experienced most of the negative side effects of that addiction, and although I am still dependent on it, I am in a much more manageable state than I once was (I was smoking 2-3 times a day as a junior in HS). In the time following me and that persons separation I felt lonely often and had a hard time being able to validate myself. It’s almost important to mention that my home life is not the smoothest that it’s ever been, and the combination of stress from that, school, and this big transition Im about to experience has taken a large toll on my life in the last 3 months or so.
So to my present situation. I met a girl at a birthday party my friend of mine was hosting (3 and a half months ago), and I quickly spotted her and decided I wanted to try and talk to her. Before even doing so, my friends mother and another friend of mine had encouraged me to talk to her because “we would be good together” (they both know her much better than me). To sum it up, it was not long before we ran off from the party, went on a long walk and talked for over an hour, and opting to go for ANOTHER shortly after, to which I kissed her for a long time. She had proclaimed that she sensed a real connection between us and seemed concerned about seeing me again, so I decided to keep things going because I had not felt this excited or connected to someone since my last partner. It’s important to note that she lives in a town about 35 minutes away, and I don’t currently have a car, so there is an obvious distance. The next week I went to her friends birthday party in her town and it went even better than the weekend prior, we once again separated ourselves from the party and got more intimate than the weekend prior. I ended up telling her a lot of the burdens in my life and it was the first time I had felt heard, you guessed it, since my previous partner. That night ended with more intimacy and her driving me home at 6 in the morning, and I thought about this night non-stop for probably 2 months. After that I was under the impression that we were seeing each other until she silently pulled away and I was unsure why. Radio silence for about a week. I was in the process of trying to accept this when we coincidentally ended up at a friends house at the same time and ended up talking things over (about 2 months after initially meeting her). Long story short, I forgave her and welcomed her back into my life. This is when the daydreaming of “what could be” and the perfect fantasy started again, except this time with a more positive outlook. About a week and a half later I called her and asked her to be my date to prom, which she happily agreed to. There was about 3 and a half weeks between then and my prom, which was this past Saturday. About 2 weeks ago she drunkenly called me and apologized for her pulling away and revealed how much it was bothering her, but I tried my best to reassure her that I had moved on and only saw that as a moment in time. The beginning part went well but rendered slightly awkward (I feel like mutual sobriety contributed to this), but the after party was when things took off. She told me that she wanted to go on another walk with me at some point that night, which made me happy because I knew what I was going to experience. This time was different than the first; there was an unspoken level of comfortablility she revealed only around me, and she told me how she wanted me to visit her in college and how she was disappointed we didn’t have the time to develop a relationship, and how long distance would probably be difficult. I asked her why she felt this level of comfortability with me, and she said it was because “she could tell I was a good person with only good intentions, and would never do anything to hurt her.” None of this was discussed extensively but rather we focused on trying to enjoy each others company, when I asked her if I could kiss her again. She told me that she wanted to ask but she felt anxious to or something like that. We spent a lot of time on that walk being intimate, into the rest of the party at my friend’s house at times we had unintentionally secluded ourselves (going to get another drink, etc). She stayed the night and I walked her to her car the next morning, and she told me she would see me again because she still has a sweatshirt of mine, I gave her a long hug and we went our separate ways. It’s important to note that she has admitted to being a bad texter, and that she did not believe in the superficiality of developing a relationship over Snapchat (our main form of communication), which is something I’ve aligned with since before meeting her. And we were both drunk 3 of the 4 times I saw her. I am also now realizing we don’t really address these moments in sobriety which raises concern to me. In the times between seeing her, we have small conversations here and there and Snap throughout the day. Needless to say, I still think a lot about what it would “be like” to be in a relationship with her and see her more often, and find myself disappointed when I don’t hear from her for a while. But at the smallest sign of validity, it entirely flips.
I want to know if this is something that I should address with her, as I want to have a manageable relationship with her in whatever aspect that may be. I also want to source more validation from other aspects of my life besides her. I already exercise about 4-5 times a week and that has kept me in line more than if I wasn’t, but I feel as though I need to do something about this directly in order to make progress. Again, I apologize for making this so fucking long lmao and if you read this all you are amazing. Any input, whether I want or don’t want to hear it, is fully welcomed.

TLdR; I used to think traditional martial arts were better then MMA until I didn't.
When I was growing up I had this very stupid idea of what martial arts were. That those who practiced them weren't just better at fighting, but that they were somehow better people of some kind. That they spent all their time on a snowy mountain top learning their secret ways, and upon completion they gained some kind of wisdom about the universe and the human soul.
And I also dismissed things like boxing or wrestling as 'real' martial arts. For some reason, I thought of them more like sports in the same way that gymnastics were. Very difficult to do and the athletes were very worthy of respect, but they didn't have that same 'woo' factor. When I was in my late teens I started doing Goju Ryu-karate. And it was a very 'traditional' kind of martial art. We did these long pre-set demonstrations called katas, we never hit punching bags or mits, always had to bow when entering the 'dojo' etc.
And this place always tried to encourage the idea that karate and the 'traditional' martial arts were superior to MMA. My sensei and the black belts always talked about how 'Sure, UFC fighters are great athletes, but they are less good because reasons.' We even had a few people who had trained boxing and I asked them 'What do you think would help you in a fight more? This karate or your boxing?' to which they would always say 'Oh karate for sure!'
And then even a few weeks after I started muay thai and Bjj I realized that all of that was a bunch of steaming bullshit. Now not to say that my some of the black belts at my old gym couldn't fight, but if they could I'm sure it has to do more with their long physical training, and the discipline to show up to class for decades of time (karate was never 'easy' I'd say). But like... learning how to do kicks, how to throw combinations, how to control someone on the ground and how to pull of submissions, that was so much more valuable then any of the crap I learnt in karate.
Rather than doing these long and beautify choreographed katas that won't account for shit when another person is in front of me who doesn't go along with my moves. A martial art that doesn't let you practice things like timing and distance is never going to be as helpful as one that does.
It also showed me that martial arts aren't 'special' in any kind of mystical sense. It's fighting. It's just about hurting the other person so much that they can't hurt you back, plain and simple. Martial artists don't have any kind of secret knowledge about the world, or the afterlife, and they're no more smarter than anyone else. They can be nice, and they can also be fucking morons or shitty people. It's just a skill. And if someone practices a skill for a life time and becomes a master of it then that's obviously impressive, but they're still just a person.
I remember about six months into my muay thai/bjj training I thought to myself 'Damn. I've been doing this for six months, but if I fought myself after my three years of karate I would eat that version of myself alive.'
I've really come to think that all of that time I spent learning karate would have been much better spent learning boxing, wrestling, muay thai, or bjj.

Senior year of college, in a specifically high level, required English major class.
So, only the furthest along on the English major track.
We had our final resesrch essay, which was like 30% of the grade. I'd say we all tried really hard obviously and are very familiar with the expectations. The class was probably about 25 folks big.
Like, working for a week or so and getting everything together and coherent and whatnot.
I had one friend in the class that was really confident. He put tons of hours of work, research and writing and revising. And he was a smart guy, always had good insight in class, good responses, in my opinion.
We turned in our essays and waited for them to be graded.
The day arrives when we get them back, at the end of class.
We shared our grades and congratulated each other.
Except my one friend.
He was sitting at his table and kind of ignoring everyone and looked super upset.
We go over and ask what he got, and he just kind of shook his head and looked defeated.
He got a 34%.
At the top of the page, in red pen, was "Is English your first language?"
And it was marked with red pen aggressively, like comments everywhere, things struck out, his thesis statement had an actual line through the whole thing.
I know for a fact this guy took his time working on it, like probably over the course of weeks, and he was an advanced English major like the rest of us.
He was defeated. Absolutely decimated.
We all encouraged him to go to the professor and ask what happened, and if he could revise for a better grade, but the hurt from this guy was intense.
I don't think I've ever felt worse for somebody academically.
"Is English your first language?"
Yikes, dude. I'd have cried.

This particular event happened a few days ago, so some emotions (and/or lack thereof) are still a bit raw.
For context: My (f, 27) ex friend (f, 22) and I used to be inseparable in all ways you could imagine. It was almost like we were sisters and many of our mutual friends considered us as such. We would video chat, text, talk, hang out, and all that jazz every single day. My ex-friend (I'll call her Hannah) also has a known streak woth many mutual friends to say "fuck all" and burn every bridge possible for a man. As of right now, Hannah's on a crazy emotional bender as she is preparing to move halfway across the USA for a player-military dude who has a track record of going through women, they've dated for less than a year, and their ENTIRE relationship is based on rebound sex.
While I have been nothing but encouraging to her on her endeavors for love and liberty, I have my personal opinions that I haven't shared with her directly as she's already heard it from other friends. This move will also be a HUGE growing-up process for her as everything she has now (apartment, car, lack of bills) has all been handed to her by her family.
I just recently celebrated my birthday (I had a huge party that she was invited to and didn't show), mother's day, bid my baby brother a farewell as he's gone off to basic. All of these things, Hannah was aware of... but she ignored me for weeks and I passed it off as her being busy with her huge move. Reasonable, right? That's what I thought as well until I saw daily snap stories or fb reels of her getting hammered at a concert one night, or with friends the other, and of course, restaurant photos with her family. She moves in a little under a month, so it was shocking to me to see her out and about so much because she was so stressed about saving money.
Fast forward to this last weekend - I was very upset with Hannah and was planning on what to say to her to work all of this out. That plan went out the window when the first thing she messaged me after weeks of ignoring me was, "How much money do you make hourly?" Around 11:00pm after not saying anything to me for weeks. I told her to research my pay on our job's company page since it's pretty open (we work at the same place).
Hannah then asked me what was wrong, and my response was something to the effect of, "You haven't spoken to me for weeks, missed my birthday, mother's day, and everything I told you about, and this is the first thing you text me?" I never received an actual apology, and her responses escalated from, "ok whatever. I'll eat that." To, "I missed your birthday, so what? It's not like it's a big deal."
I was surprisingly in a calm demeanor when I informed her that I cannot deal with inconsistent relationships by any means and how much I gave up my comforts and boundaries to be her friend as we ran in separate circles, and Hannah wanted me to open up a bit more and not make my marriage and children my entire personality. Hannah's response to this was a very mature, "You're not needed or important." And, "I'm so happy I'm leaving now, because I'm tired of you always being mad at someone." Which is far from the truth about my personality.
After receiving all that, I figured the conversation was going nowhere, so I turned off my phone and went to bed. The next morning, I discovered that she removed me from all social media. For the last few days, a notification pops up on my TikTok stating that she viewed my profile (almost daily). Maybe I'm not as unimportant as she claims I am.
The only other person I've told (beside my husband and mother) is my friend, and Hannah's ex-friend (I'll call him Junior). Since then, Junior's informed me that she has been speaking poorly and has been going through the wringer mentally, emotionally, and financially. My response to this was how much I don't care anymore which is new territory for me, and feels like a half-truth right now... like I'm convincing myself to not give a fuck. I've always been the cry-on-my-shoulder mom friend, even before I had children. I mourn for the good memories before the fallout, but I need to put my foot down and speak up for myself. AITAH for that?

Denise Pilnak was a neighbor of Nicole’s. Her telephone bill shows she was on the phone from 10:25 PM and 10:28 PM. Prior to making this phone call, she and her friend noted how quiet the neighborhood was. Several minutes later between 10:33 and 10:35 PM, she testified that’s when she began to hear the sound of a barking dog, which is likely when the murders began. Allan Park testified to seeing OJ near the front door of the Rockingham estate at 10:55 PM, and his telephone records also document that. That leaves less than 25 minutes to commit the murders, drive back home, get rid of the evidence, etc.
Both Nicole and Ron had defensive wounds. Ron in particular was in hand to hand combat with whoever killed him, yet OJ had no injuries. The cut on his finger wasn’t seen by anyone who interacted with him at the airport, on the airplane ride to Chicago, nor when he immediately landed in Chicago. This includes people who got autographs from him, shook hands with him, and observed his hands. A broken glass was also found in his hotel room and it was documented he asked for a bandage at the hotel.
The FBI searched all of OJ’s and Nicole's credit card records and there was never any receipt found belonging to either of them that showed a purchase of Bruno Magli shoes. Every store that sold the shoes in the country was also searched, and they couldn't find anyone who sold him the shoes. The only proof of him owning them are the National Enquirer photos, which show him wearing suede shoes on a very rainy day. It was also found that the shoe soles that were said to be OJ's footprint were actually more popular than the prosecution maintained, the manufacturer sold the pattern to numerous shoe lines.
1.5 millimeters of OJ’s blood went missing from its vial. Thanos Peratis, the nurse who withdrew his blood, initially testified that he withdrew 8 millimeters. He took that back when only 6.5 appeared and the prosecution suggested he was mistaken. About a decade later he admitted to William Dear that he was certain he withdrew 8 millimeters because it was the amount he had drawn from patients all of his career, but he was close to retirement and had health problems so he didn’t want to cause any trouble.
The glove found at Bundy contained none of OJ’s DNA. The other glove found at Rockingham only contained his DNA in the area where Collin Yamauchi testified to spilling OJ's reference blood sample while handling it.
An identical knit cap matching the knit cap found lying on the ground next to one of the gloves was found in Nicole’s house. Those caps likely belonged to Sydney and Justin Simpson.
Two different people, John Meraz and William Blasini, encountered the Bronco at the lot where it had been impounded days after the murders. They both looked inside it for blood and testified they saw none. There was also only 1/8th of one drop of blood ever found inside it.
New York Times best selling author and journalist Stephen Singular was connected by an anonymous source within the LAPD about the case a few weeks after the murders. He was told Mark Fuhrman made an undocumented trip to Rockingham in the early morning hours after the murders looking for evidence that would incriminate OJ. Rosa Lopez, a housekeeper for OJ’s next door neighbor, testified to hearing men’s voices coming from the yard of Rockingham in the early morning.
The source told Singular that Fuhrman used a broken piece of fence from Bundy to pick up one of the two gloves found and placed it in a blue plastic bag. Next, he was told Fuhrman removed the glove from the plastic bag and planted it at Rockingham. A broken piece of fence was eventually found at Bundy and a blue plastic bag was found at Rockingham, and both were introduced as evidence in the trial.
He was also told EDTA would be found in some of the blood evidence if tested, lab technicians had mishandled OJ’s blood samples, vials of OJ’s, Nicole’s, and Ron's blood were in possession of an LAPD detective for several hours before being booked into evidence, and that Fuhrman had been acquainted with Nicole in some way.
Singular relayed this information from the source to the defense team and was in communication with them for awhile. Pretty much all of it checked out, including an investigation conducted by the LAPD's Internal Affairs Division which revealed that Fuhrman was overheard by other LAPD officers bragging about being intimate with Nicole and seeing her boob job before she was murdered.
There were 17 fingerprints lifted from the Bundy crime scene that didn’t belong to OJ or any of the police officers involved in the case.
Brett Cantor ran a nightclub called The Dragonfly where Ron worked for him as a waitepromoter. Nicole was also a regular at the club. He was murdered a year before them in almost exactly the same way, by being stabbed repeatedly in the upper body and being nearly decapitated. Judge Ito ruled the defense team could review his case. His murder remains unsolved.
Casimir Sucharski, a friend of OJ's, was murdered alongside two female companions in his house in Florida by people with machine guns two weeks after Ron and Nicole were murdered.
Michael Nigg was friends with Ron and also worked at the Mezzaluna restaurant. He was murdered a year later in 1995 by being shot in the head after refusing to give his money to two men outside an ATM. The men who shot him didn't end up taking his money. His murder remains unsolved.
Not saying these murders are necessarily related to each other but it does make you wonder since all of these people reportedly led similar lifestyles which involved the use of cocaine. Faye Resnick, a cocaine addict, was also living with Nicole just days before the murders.
If you listen to the full 1993 911 call, OJ was mostly yelling about drugs and hookers being in the house. When police officers responded to the call, Nicole told the responding officers that OJ hadn’t hit her in four years. After the 1989 domestic violence incident, OJ added an addendum to their prenuptial agreement which stated that if he struck Nicole again, she would‘ve been entitled to a settlement of more than 5 million dollars.
OJ wasn't scheduled to be in LA during that week. He had been busy working and made a last minute decision to come back for Sydney's recital. Video taken of him afterwards shows him in a good mood, kissing his kids and the Brown’s goodbye.
Christian Reichardt spoke with OJ on the phone an hour before the murders and testified his demeanor was jovial and not indicative of a simmering murderous rage.
His telephone records also show he made phone calls trying to set up dates with a few models, one of which he told he was unattached to anyone. If he was in a jealous rage over Nicole, why was he trying to date other women?
After the bodies were discovered, Sydney told the police she heard her mommy (Nicole) fighting & crying with her best friend (Faye Resnick) on the phone earlier that night.
Sydney was planning to have a sleepover that night with one of her friends. According to family and friends who attended the recital and dinner, OJ was aware of this. Committing a murder with all those extra witnesses and the possibility of having the kids hurt or things getting out of control, in addition to having a flight to catch, doesn’t make sense.

My boyfriend of 2 years and I had made plans a week ago to go out to the city yesterday and take cute couple photos, which was actually his idea to begin with. Our work schedules are pretty opposite. So, when we hang out any other day, it’s usually after work for me and it’s usually just dinner and hanging out for a couple of hours. I knew that this day with the photos would take a good chunk of our day and we both wanted to make sure we had plenty of time together. The only solution we could come up with would be to take the day off. I ended up taking the day off.
Well, yesterday morning, at 7am, he texts me saying he’s taking his sister to the ER and that we need to reschedule the original time we had planned. I responded saying “hope everything is okay, keep me updated”. And then I hadn’t heard from him all day. I called him, texted him and nothing. He then updates me, 9 hours later that his sister fell and hit her head. I expressed my concern and wished for her speedy recovery. I then asked him to call me when he had chance. He calls, and we talked for about 10 minutes. He said sorry for not saying anything and that his phone was on silent and didn’t want to talk to anyone and that he couldn’t focus on anything else.
I’m not mad that he couldn’t meet up, obviously his sister is injured, so he says. It’s the communication. He has actually used the ER excuse as a reason in the past when we had made plans. One time he claimed to have been in the ER for chest pain and didn’t tell me until midnight, claimed it’s too hard to think when you’re in that kind of situation. Another time, we were supposed to go on a birthday weekend getaway, he had gone to the ER and it had gotten canceled. One time he was supposed to see me, he claimed he needed to help his friend with something and couldn’t meet up. So, Idk, it seems weird something like this happens constantly when we have plans.
We actually broke up 3 months ago because of his communication problems. He didn’t talk to me for 10 days after losing his job, he basically acted like I didn’t exist to him and that he was dealing with his issues and that I shouldn’t be upset with him. I broke up with him for this. Then 2 months later, he reached out again, apologized for everything and promised to work on it and that he still loves me. I decided to give him another chance, and things were good, up until today.
What bothers me, is he knew I took the day off for us. I know technically it’s not a big deal, but I work in the medical field and hate taking days off unless absolutely necessary. He knows how I feel about my job. And then the whole disappearing act of not saying anything to me. Claimed to be not on his phone and was ignoring all calls. I’m sitting at home worried sick and he doesn’t even have the decency to take one minute out of his day to text me to update me. And considering the type of injury she had, he could’ve told me that I should go to work because he won’t be able to make it, but he basically had me sitting and waiting for him. This almost feels break up worthy for me. I’m not sure if I’m overreacting though.
Tldr: bf and I made plans to go take photos in the city then he proceeded to not say anything to me for an entire day. He had to take his sister to the hospital and said we would reschedule for a later time, making it seem like we would meet up, but he didn’t. He has used the ER excuse before and has had communication issues which upsets me so much whenever it occurs

He’s gone to this festival almost every year since 2010. It’s a 4 day camping fest and happens to fall on my birthday every year. I’ve spent 2 birthdays there. For him. Fine, not a big deal. Last year he went with a friend because I didn’t want to go. Personally it’s not my thing. He turned 40 in January. I took him to the place he wanted to have dinner and we spent the night where he requested. I surprised him with a weekend in NY and a trip to Baseball HOF which was a bucket list place for him. Huge baseball fan. I made sure everything was for him. I found out at his birthday celebration in January the he was making plans to go to this festival. I was super shocked. I made it clear I wasn’t happy about it. I’ve been making a big deal about our 40th for a good while now. I’ve expressed how I feel about the importance of this day for me, personally, many times. It’s the only birthday in our 8 years together that I’ve mentioned I cared about. He moved forward with plans and will be gone for a week. He says he’s been waiting a long time to see this one set and that the date doesn’t matter, we can celebrate before or after. He doesn’t think this is of any significance. We will celebrate when he gets back. I feel defeated and like I’m not a priority, amongst many other feelings. This is coming up in a couple weeks and I can’t wrap my head around being home on my 40th while he’s wasted at a festival with his guy friends. He did invite me to go but I declined. It’s not my thing and he knows this. Is it that really that deep or AITA?

So I deleted my 10+ year reddit account when reddit killed off all the 3rd party apps as spite. I have figured something out and need more eyes on it. If you have the ability please relay this to the other GME subs that restrict posting more heavily but tend to be more viewed.
"Are you the kind that sees signs?" https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1791136527801807077
"it's not just a call, it's a warning": https://x.com/i/status/1790441953659687421
Before I get any further I want to make something all too clear. Buying, holding and DRSing is why we are in this position. There are so many references to RK saying that DRSing was good that it's not even worth going into. This is not an anti-DRS message. Clear? Good.
DFV is telling us to buy options.
"When I move you move, just like that?" https://x.com/i/status/1790056912664601031
Okay so exposition established. On to what I found. Look at this:
This tweet : https://x.com/i/status/1790728848226521547
Han Solo going into the Asteroid Field is meant to signify something "crazy". Like buying ITM calls a month out at 10 minutes before the bell rings.
Now - this is where it gets good:
listen to C3P0 when he says 3720 to 1. When he says 20 the audio is boosted. I downloaded the audio from this RK tweet and put it into audacity to confirm this theory and it checks out. Here is an imgur album of the snippet: https://imgur.com/a/PuHBmLU
Secondly the lyrics of the song that plays when Han goes into the Asteroid Field:
Listen up and you won't go wrong again Float along on a verse-less song and then Get to where the two ends meet Come, come, come, come, come along now Run away from the hum-drum (this is buying and holding. He is still us to follow his lead "move when he moves" and buy calls) We'll go to a place that is safe from Greed, anger and boredom
This isn't the only instance of boosted audio on the number 20 in his tweets. Check out the shawshank one, same thing :
"old kitty did it in 20" : https://x.com/i/status/1790894938277695671
https://imgur.com/a/https-x-com-i-status-1790894938277695671-9cI9iLh
Please feel free to reproduce these results. I used Jdownloader2 to pull the audio from twitter and Audacity to look at it.
Finally - I think I get the "flip mode" and personality changing tweets. He is telling us to grow a pair of balls and stop investing like roaringkitty and start investing like deepfuckingvalue
https://x.com/i/status/1790743946764644659
We are meant to follow him into the asteroid field. He is the one making these calls at 10 minutes before the bell.
Listen - I'm a level headed guy so I'll temper all of this with....it could be someone else on his twitter. But his fucking reddit account is active at the same time. I'm either getting giga meme'd or we're going to be fucking millionares. Either way - I found something and I'm choosing to be an optimist about it.
Edit: I just pieced together more. The number 10 keeps being highlighted by DFV in his tweets as well. It's the only gold text that the monk has during the Gangs of New York Tweet : https://x.com/i/status/1790056912664601031
Also the green text in the matrix video just before it switches to Alice in Wonderland. The number 10 is the only readable thing in the green text. The song also starts off with 10 feet tall. He's the one doing this 10 minutes before close.
https://x.com/i/status/1790830761542664192

Throwaway account bc I don’t want this getting back to me and my Reddit account has way too much personal info on so there’s this dude I’m fucking who’s cool but I keep replaying little intimate moments or times he laughs at something I say and it’s driving me CRAZY. For context - I (29f) and hooking up with this dude (29m) who is enm in a very committed relationship. I am so happy he has someone serious bc I am way too independent and enjoy that we keep our encounters to the bedroom, yet I’ve been noticing that we have SO much chemistry to the point where he’s even commented on it and how it’s not like that with everyone which has me questioning does he even have chemistry with his partner or is he just with her bc they have been together for so long and I keep thinking about him and it’s fucking annoying and i don’t know what to do about it bc im not trying to be a home wrecker and id like some clarification on boundaries like until when or how many times or occasions of having sex does he then have to end things or how often am I allowed to asked him to come over i also don’t want to appear needy to him and I have kept myself in check pretty proud of myself for not texting him often and strictly just hey come over ok on my way kinda texts but damn it’s such good sex and I’m craving more and I also need to keep myself in check bc I know how I can get when I find myself enjoying someone’s company and I’m trying to not deal with those feelings and today while scrolling on Facebook while peeing I saw him on the friends you may know which is weird bc I haven’t searched him up but I know that if someone else searches you then their profile shows up on your friends you may know so now I’m wondering like is he thinking about me as much as I’m thinking about him??
ALSO ok so he showed up on my Facebook people you may know so I went and peeped at his prof and he has his gf on there and she’s so cute lol so I looked at her profile and THE FIRST PERSON ON HE FRIENDS was this person who was literally the one that got away. She went to the same undergrad as him. I’m just like woah small fucking world what are the odds
The one that got away was this dude from 5 years ago who I had the most organic chemistry and like really fell in lust so quick and nothing has been as good as him and it was such a whirlwind I remember he had all these rules for himself where it was basically fuck and leave no cuddling no pillow talk no sleepovers no dates and he broke all those rules with me and then it ended bc he moved away and I lost my shit so anyways I was really not expecting to see HIM as her first person on friends and I’m just feeling so much right now bc tbh the chemistry I have with fwb who is enm is eerily similar to the chemistry I had with the one that got away and just seeing him on her fb friends after having been pondering about this similarity in chemistry already is freaking me out.

There’s been a few post recently with drivers stating they have good 1 lap pace but can’t get any consistency and lack race craft. One guy was professing to be doing times comparable with Pro licence drivers but was stuck around 2k IR
Now this isn’t aimed at those people necessarily cause I don’t know where they got their one lap pace from. They may have more midichlorians than Senna, but I doubt it and have my suspicions.
A big trend sim racing over the last few years is hotlapping. It seems a lot of people are starting out this way on games like F1. They get quick over one lap and think they can come to a platform like Iracing and dominate. They then frustrated cause whilst they can smash out 1 quick lap they can’t finish a race or deal with pressure.
Now, if you want to hotlap. Go for it. It’s a genuine endeavour and I guess it’s nice being on a leaderboard somewhere. However be aware it will have implications later on.
Just watching YouTube videos and copying alien drivers is doing you no favours
You are essentially acting like a chimpanze or small child copying a grown human peeling and eating a banana. .
These people who just watch other people’s videos and hotlap have done themselves a massive disservice in the long run cause they haven’t learnt how to drive a track fast themselves or any race craft such as how to take a corner off line fast. Where to brake when defending off line or when following closely behind someone.
They just want to copy other drivers videos like a western lowland gorilla watching and copying a primatologist do a basic jigsaw puzzle in front of them.
Really, the only thing you have achieved by hotlapping, like with the chimp and the banana analogy, is that you have opposable thumbs and a semi functional brain.
The chickens come home to roost for these people once they get out of mediocre lobbies and they start racing against people who know how to force them into a mistake, or force them to put their car on a part of track where they don’t want it to be. They cannot deal with it.
You have skipped the part where you can race against people at your level cause of your mentality thinking your 1 lap pace is everything.
If you’re 2K IR level Iracer with 6K IR pace you’re essentially like the great ape who can do a jigsaw puzzle in a lab but can’t interact with other chimps in the wild.
If you’re just starting out forget about hotlapping and race. By all means watch videos to learn lines etc. but take the time to learn tracks yourself. Learn defensive lines learn how you should drive the first lap of a race, learn how to make the car your racing wheel to wheel with make an error.
Understand what technique the driver you are watching is using and then try do a random track and apply those techniques yourself.
If you are fast, genuinely fast - it will come with enough time.