My dog cut his back paw pad last Monday which resulted in 5 wire stitches in one of his toes. He saw the vet for a follow up appointment on Friday, and yesterday. On Friday, the vet said one of the stitches had an infection. We were given an extra 5 days of antibiotics for this. Last night, his fresh bandage came off he got really agitated and started limping I called the emergency vet to take a look at him (this vet is within our normal vet clinic). He was wearing a silicone sock when the bandage came off, so his bare foot never touched the ground.
The emergency vet looked at his stitches, said everything looked fine, popped on some manuka honey and rewrapped the leg. I had given my dog a prescribed painkiller about 30 minutes before the appointment. He left the vets still limping but by the time we got home he was walking on the leg.
At 4.30 this morning he woke me up, he was really restless and low and behold, less than 6 hours from getting home from the vet he's limping again. He won't put any weight on the leg.
I'm not sure if I should call the vets when they open at 9 and ask them to have another look at him or if this is normal, but he's just not himself and the limp one week after injury is really worrying me.
Does anyone have any advice?
Species: Dog Age: 18 months Neuter status: not neutered Breed: Poodle X Body Weight: 28.5kg History: No history of illness Clinical signs: Limp, restless, agitated Duration: injury 7 days ago, limp since last night which periodically stopped after vet visit Location: Ireland

I've posted this timeline before but this subreddit wasn't really being moderated and I deleted my posts. It appears to be moderated now, the trolls were just too much.
Anyways here's my cancer timeline. I'm happy to answer questions. I just had my 4th colonoscopy today and only had 1 polyp found. I've included my weights at various stages to show that weight gain can happen on chemo and that it is possible to lose that weight!
Low iron lead to the colonoscopy. I had various symptoms and diagnoses leading up the colon cancer. Separately they're not concerning but in hindsight the colon cancer dates back years most likely.
10/29/2017 - Iron/Total Iron Binding Capacity: 3%
12/5/2017 - Blocking tumor found in descending colon during colonoscopy. Ambry Genetics ColoNext panel (17 genes): APC, BMPR1A, CDH1, CHEK2, EPCAM, GREM1, MLH1, MSH2, MSH6, MUTYH, PMS2, POLD1, POLE, PTEN, SMAD4, STK11, and TP53 and additional pancreatic cancer-related genes A TM, BRCA1, BRCA2, CDKN2A, PALB2 all negative.
12/29/2017 - Partial colectomy performed, 5.2cm tumor, confirmed invasion on 2/25 lymph nodes and perineural invasion. aware of the 5mm lower left lung nodule, never biopsied. Pathologic staging pT3pN1 Adenocarcinoma.
2/26/2018 - 8/6/2018 - Weight before the first chemo ~185lbs. Folfox Q2week, 1 week delay in 1 treatment due to infected dog bite.
9/27/2018 - Lower left lung nodule gone on CT.
2/19/2020 - Central retinal artery occlusion of the left retina during non cancer related surgery at John Hopkins. Essentially blind in left eye. No treatment available.
3/5/2020 - Lung nodule in lower left lobe, 12x10mm, and upper right lobe, 7x5mm, found on CT scan from post stroke work up.
2/20/2021 - Lung nodule in lower left lobe, 17x14mm, and upper right lobe, 9x6mm, per CT.
3/19/2021 - PET findings: Lower left lung lobe lesion, 15x15mm. Upper right lung lobe lesion, 7x7mm. Partial left-sided colectomy with colocolic anastomosis in the left midabdomen without evidence of FDG avid recurrent or metastatic disease in the abdomen or pelvis. There are 2 pulmonary pulmonary nodules with mild FDG uptake concerning for pulmonary metastases.
4/6/2021 - Needle core biopsy of lower left lung lobe nodule (still aware of nodule in right upper lobe, not biopsied at this time), confirmed metastatic colon cancer (positive cytokeratin 20, negative cytokeratin 7, Napsin A and TTF-1 stains)
Upgraded to Clinical Stage IV (CT3, CN1, cM1b) from pathologic staging of pT3pN1
4/19/2021 - Folfiri 1x treatment
NGS showed KRAS/NRAS/BRAF WT, NTHL1
5/3/2021 - 7/12/2021 - Folfiri+Erbitux, Q2Week, 1 stopped treatment when at home pump line is cut, didn't finish treatment that week
8/13/2021 - VATS lung wedge resection of lower left lung lobe nodule 9mm, confirmed colon cancer again, adenocarcinoma (positive cytokeratin 20, negative cytokeratin 7, Napsin A and TTF-1 stains)
9/15/2021 - VATS lung wedge resection of upper right lung lobe. Adenocarcinoma. Start of NED.
10/18/2021 - 1/11/2022 Folfox-6 modified. Q2week. 1 stopped treatment in December, unable to stop vomiting blood, spent several days in hospital, chemotherapy induced gastritis, was near needing blood transfusion. For the last few treatments I went through desensitization protocol. Hives, itching, some shortness of breath, given IV Benadryl and IV solu-medrol at each treatment. Along with iron infusions afterwards due to low iron from vomiting blood. Final chemo weight 293lbs.
5/10/2024 - Weight: 212lbs

Hey guys.
Been trying to find answers about this around online, but keep find articles upon articles of quitting cold turkey. However, for almost the past two weeks I've been taking a slower approach to quitting, and am being anxious about it due to random symptoms.
Quick backstory:
Past few months, was eyeing finally quitting. Been vaping for about 3 years, and noticed I had gotten to the point where I was taking a puff literally every 5-10 minutes...too easy access to just snatch it while gaming, mindlessly puffing away. Was going through 80%-100% of a Vuze pod every day on average, and that trend lasted about 6 months.
Couple weeks ago I had a somewhat related event that led to me pulling the trigger. It was slightly unrelated, but gave me the "dang...I need to ditch that too." motivation. Basically long story short, got ahold of a bad delta8 pen, and it spiraled into horrendous symptoms for two days that almost landed me in the ER. BUT the symptoms gave me anxiety about nicotine vape too, so I figured "alright...it's time. It all goes, before you end up going instead."
But I was afraid of going cold turkey, so instead I've been doing a heavy weening.
I went from the above 80-100% of a vuze pod, down to now about 20% of a pod per day on average. Today was even less...woke up this morning with only about 10% of the pod remaining, and it's still got a few drops in it after a full day.
So overall still motivated. Figure after this week, I'm going to try the cold turkey route. At that point I would be having so little per day that it'd be moot to continue it.
However what worries me:
I've got a doctor's appointment to go over this stuff too, so don't think I'm trying to WebMD this...but it would be helpful to get some personal stories too, if anyone else has experienced this.
My biggest worry at this point is "Am I quitting too late? Is something majorly wrong with me and what I felt a couple weeks ago that started this whole thing wasn't a delta8 pen, but rather something more serious like cancer or vape-related lung injuries?"
I've also got other possible causes in mind that I'm trying to either support theory on or eliminate. I moved back into my mother's place in September to help her after my dad passed away. There's some mold in the house that we are cleaning out, so I fear exposure to that could be a cause. Then also this is my first Spring living here in over 8 years. So I also wonder if these symptoms could be me readjusting the pollen here. I also drastically cut back on drinking over the past month...went from being able to have a full bottle of sake or wine any given night to now I won't drink anything over the level of a hard seltzer.
So basically I got slapped with "Too many variables changed, and too many possible unknown variables in the mix, and now I'm wondering if something's actually wrong with me, or it's just things to push through."
Symptoms that I have been feeling:

• Stiffness in my lungs some mornings. Will wake up and just feel a general tightness deep in my chest. Not like hypertension tightness, as I know what that one feels like. I'm talking deeper...like inhaling and you feel some achy resistance to the deep breath. I have no problem holding my breath once I get a full deep breath in, but it's just annoying that that feeling lasts for a few hours...sometimes all day. It's almost like the lungs being stuck together or tacky...like when you have wet elmer's glue on your fingers and try pulling them apart.
  • Is this supposed to happen this shortly after cutting back (stressing/highlighting that, to remind that this wasn't a cold turkey quit...just slammed on the brakes over the course of a week, but still hitting here and there daily). I knew that this type of feeling would come eventually, but most places online said it was more like week 2 and 3, maybe 4, because your lungs essentially start cleaning themselves off, operating more efficiently, etc. and some of the feeling is even your own mind getting used to your lungs controlling themselves at fuller capacity.
  • But this happened on week one for me...is that normal?
• Neck stiffness all over. Similar to when you're getting over a cold, it's like my lymphnodes are quite angry with me right now. Have felt a general soreness all the way up and down the left and right side of my neck along where doctors normally poke when they're checking your nodes. I've also felt stiffness in the back of my neck, radiating up my head around my ear, leading to my temple...this one's a bit more explainable I think, as that sounds like a tension headache, which is to be expected with nic withdrawal. My main concern has been the lymphnode areas being sore, because that can also be indicative of more than just withdrawal symptoms (lung infection or, worse, cancer).
• Phlegm, but from my nasal passages? Similar to the above: Like getting over a cold, you hit that point where your sinuses drain...but I didn't expect it with this. I keep feeling lumps of phlegm go down my throat when I sniffle sometimes. I expected it to happen with the lungs and I'd cough up phlegm (that hasn't started yet), but the nasal passages?
• "Waking Drowning": Some nights lately when I go to bed, Soon after I fall asleep, I snap awake gasping for air with my heart racing. Usually within the first 5-10 minutes of falling asleep. Lately this has led to a couple sleepless nights. Although I'm rational enough night-to-night to not fear falling asleep over it just because it happened the previous night, once it happens the first time on a given night, THEN I become afraid to fall asleep for that night.
• A feeling of physical disconnection: This one may be caused by the neck stiffness, but some days I wake up and I feel like my head is actually detached from my neck and just floating there. It's weird...feels like being high without all the fun parts, and that feeling lingers all day.
• Feeling annoyingly rundown: I've been having issues focusing at work and whatnot. Thankfully I work from home and can somewhat play it off, but the past few workdays I've had to sneak naps on lunch.
• Shaky feeling without the shake. Sometimes my hands will tremor for a moment or two, but that's it as far as visible shakiness. However I have had moments where I'm sitting here feeling like I'm vibrating in random parts of my upper body. Will even look at that body part closely to see if I actually am...but nope still as a can be, yet still feels vibratey lol.

The weird thing about all of the above is that they're being random day-to-day. Either I wake up perfectly fine and have a great day. OR all of the above hits me at once and then disappears again the next day. There doesn't seem to be much "in between."
Overall, though, none of this is stopping me from quitting... I know anxiety is part of "the experience" of quitting, so I've been careful about not letting it convince me to reset. If anything it's spurred more motivation, because I'm never letting a chemical have this level of a hold again. Thankfully, although as you can see anxiety is getting channeled into the above, mood hasn't shifted much in terms of everything else. I've had moments of depression, but not much out of the normal, and the anxiety seems to be more focused on helping me quit rather than convincing me to puff more. But it would be nice if the anxiety would stop trying to convince me that I'm dying, hence me wanting to just gather more info that I'm not finding online.
In advance though, thank you, and I look forward to hearing about anyone else who's experienced the above, and if you know of any remedies that'd be greatly appreciated. Feels good to be finally kicking this after having stupidly picked it up 3 years ago.

About a month ago out of no where I started getting chest pains, heartburn, felt like I couldn’t breathe, and my stomach hurt so bad I thought I was going to die. I’ve had normal acid reflux my whole life, but not to the point where I was in immense pain because of it, didn’t even have to take any otc meds.
Went to the ER one night after what I felt was a heart attack, turns out my appendix was infected and needed emergency surgery. Ok! I thought maybe that was the issue for all the stomach issues, acid reflux, etc.
I ended up getting it taken out the following day, was in the hospital trying to get back to normal for a couple days and come home. All is well for about 4 days until the same thing happens.. chest pain, heartburn, nausea and stomach fullness. This time I’m not able to get any food down because it just makes it worse. Back to the er again.
They do another ct scan and ultrasound to see if anything else might be going on or it might be infected. Nope. Nothing. He did tell me there was some sort of fullness going on but didn’t know what it was. I was prescribed with Protonix for a week until I can see a GI, but the pain is still there.
It just feels like my whole life changed in a matter of minutes. I feel miserable and am not able to work, which is bad because I have bills and no one to really help me, I’m kinda on my own here.
I guess my question is… what do you think is going on? I’ve tried all the home remedies like magnesium, peppermint tea, bland foods, nothing helps! Im just in pain 24/7.

We have a senior dog that is in late stage lymphoma, to the point where we have already scheduled and cancelled 3 appts for at home euthanasia when he was not looking good. We had found some relief of his symptoms with homeopathic remedies, but we absolutely cannot afford a regimen of chemo or radiation treatments. Realistically whatever we do has to cost less than euthanasia because that will likely be our final solution in at most a few weeks anyway. The goal at the moment is to make him as comfortable as we can until that point, even if the treatment is basically not sustainable long term, since he doesn't really have long term as an option anyway.
Getting a vet that understands practical concerns is tantamount since tests are not going to help and take time to run and really aren't going to open up any options no matter what they confirm or not for him. We already have the euthanasia on standby, and the newest factor is that the lymph nodes have come to be swollen to the point of interference with his breathing causing hacking and gagging discomfort. We know that prednisone can alleviate this and understand that it won't fix him and may deteriorate other systems, but frankly it doesn't matter if he might end up with cushings LATER if he can't breathe NOW.
We aren't willing to do the chemo or radiation as there are other pets in the house that can be affected by toxicity of waste products and cost is absolutely a factor. Where can we take him to get some affordable palliative care options today so that we can enjoy the short time he has left with us in a better way than watching him struggle and stress?
EDIT: To those who don't seem to realize we are prepared to euthanize, this is not a prolonging suffering solution, we will put him down when it becomes evident that he is not enjoying his time with us any longer. Without this solution, that will be the alternative, but this medication absolutely can make the swollen nodes shrink down and allow him to be comfortable and happy until such time as he isn't anymore. It is to improve his quality of life for what time remains, not extend it. It just means that we don't have to cut it shorter in order to stop his suffering.
We got what we needed through Vetster. Thank you..

Coconut oil contains monolaurin, which has been linked to potent antiviral and antifungal effects. But how does monolaurin kill viruses, bacteria, and fungi?
What is monolaurin?
Monolaurin is a naturally occurring compound that belongs to a class of chemicals known as monoglycerides. It’s derived from lauric acid, a medium-chain-fatty acid found abundantly in coconut oil and human breast milk. Although monolaurin can be extracted from natural sources, many dietary supplements contain chemically synthesized monolaurin, created by reacting lauric acid with glycerol or glycerin.
“Certain fatty acids and monoglycerides, including lauric acid and monolaurin, are powerful antimicrobial agents,” explains Dr. Berg. “Virgin coconut oil has been used as a medicinal food to manage and prevent viral and bacterial infections for hundreds of years.”
In addition, monolaurin is a natural preservative that can play a role in food safety. Because of its antibacterial and antifungal properties, monolaurin inhibits the growth of certain microbes linked to food-borne illnesses.
How does monolaurin work?
Monolaurin is classified as a monoglyceride, a simple lipid that readily attaches to other lipid structures, including the membrane surrounding viruses. By binding to lipid-enveloped viruses, monolaurin directly inhibits the normal functioning of viral particles. This disruption can prevent the virus from entering host cells and replicating, ultimately inhibiting its ability to spread and cause infection. In addition, monolaurin has been found to enhance the immune response against enveloped RNA and DNA viruses. These types of viruses are responsible for various infectious diseases, including respiratory infections, sexually transmitted diseases, hepatitis, and some types of cancers.
Benefits of monolaurin
Monolaurin is considered a natural remedy within the realm of alternative medicine, where it’s valued for its potential antimicrobial properties and immune-supporting effects. In addition to its impressive antiviral effects, monolaurin displays potent antimicrobial properties that are effective against various other pathogenic microorganisms, including bacteria, fungi, and yeasts.

Antiviral

The antiviral effects of monolaurin have been extensively researched. According to a study published in Food Research, monolaurin has demonstrated potent antiviral properties against various classes of viruses, including:

• Herpes simplex virus
• Influenza virus
• Avian influenza virus
• Arbovirus (yellow fever)
• Coronavirus
• Zika virus

Much of this research has focused on monolaurin’s in vitro effects, meaning that it's been studied in laboratory settings rather than in living organisms. However, this data does provide valuable insights into monolaurin's antiviral potential. Interestingly, research published in the Journal of Nutritional Science found that the consumption of coconut oil, a rich source of monolaurin, supported rapid relief of COVID-19 symptoms.
The authors concluded, “This study bolsters the use of coconut oil as an effective adjunct therapy for COVID-19-positive patients showing mild-to-moderate symptoms.”
Antibacterial
In addition to its antiviral properties, monolaurin has also been found to be a highly effective natural remedy to manage and prevent bacterial infections. Because monolaurin is a lipid structure, it can bind to and interact with the cell membrane of bacteria. This can puncture bacterial cell walls, leading to leaks and loss of cellular functionality, eventually triggering bacterial cell death.
Data published by the American Oil Chemists Society (AOCS) found that monolaurin compounds were effective at inhibiting various strains of gram-positive bacteria, a group of microbes associated with a wide range of infectious diseases. Gram-positive bacteria include Staphylococcus, Streptococcus, Salmonella, and Clostridium. These harmful microbes are known for causing a wide range of infections in humans, such as pneumonia, skin infections, food poisoning, and diarrhea.
Monolaurin may also benefit oral and gastrointestinal health if used topically as a mouthwash. A study published in the Journal of Physiology and Pharmacology found that a monolaurin-containing oral rinse effectively eradicated Helicobacter pylori. This bacterial strain is linked to inflammation of the stomach lining, ulcers, and stomach cancer.

Antifungal

Similarly to its antiviral and antibacterial activity, monolaurin can disrupt the cell membranes of fungi, which inhibits fungal growth and triggers cell death. In addition, monolaurin has been found to strengthen the immune system by enhancing the ability of immune cells to detect and destroy infectious yeast and fungal species.
Research published in Biological and Pharmaceutical Bulletin suggests that monolaurin is effective in the prevention and management of Candida albicans, a fungal species linked to oral thrush and vaginal yeast infections. Monolaurins' potent antimicrobial properties may explain why topical coconut oil application has been used for centuries as a natural remedy to manage fungal skin infections such as athlete's foot and ringworm.

Sources of monolaurin

Monolaurin is derived through the enzymatic conversion of lauric acid, which is naturally abundant in coconut oil and breast milk. Research published in ChemBioEng Reviews suggests that lauric acid comprises around 50 percent of the fatty acids in extra virgin coconut oil, making it one of the best dietary sources of monolaurin.
Certain fermented foods, such as yogurt and cheese, can also contain monolaurin. However, these foods typically don’t provide enough monolaurin to have significant therapeutic effects. In addition, monolaurin is available as a dietary supplement typically produced by extracting and purifying monolaurin from natural sources rich in lauric acid, such as coconut oil.

Dosage

The best monolaurin dosage depends on its intended use, your overall health status, and the specific formulation of the supplement. If you are taking monolaurin as a preventative measure to reduce the risk of microbial infections, a typical dosage ranges between 300 and 600 milligrams daily.
However, short periods of significantly higher monolaurin dosages of up to 1,800 milligrams per day may be necessary to manage acute infections. It’s also advised to start with a lower dose and gradually increase monolaurin intake to minimize the risk of side effects such as gastrointestinal issues and sensitivities.
Although monolaurin is generally well tolerated, it can interact with certain drugs, including blood thinners. If you are taking prescription medications or have underlying health issues, it’s vital to consult a healthcare provider to discuss the use of monolaurin.

My boyfriend and I have lived together for a couple years and he is very tidy for the most part, in fact I would even say he is more tidy than I am with his belongings. However there are things he does which really give me “the ick” and just make me feel disgusted living with him. But I guess the issue is that when I get annoyed he acts as if I am being hypocritical because I am untidy in ways such as leaving my clothes out,etc. but in my opinion, the things he does that disgust me are not just leaving things laying around (which is what I am guilty of) but actually doing things that are just straight up gross. For example:
We don’t have a dishwasher so we have to hand wash our dishes. He will often not wash the dishes thoroughly and when we first started living together I would be drinking from a glass and it would smell of food water from the sink. Then I would look closer and see that the glass had clearly not been cleaned well at all. So sometimes I would watch him wash the dishes and I saw that he would just be doing a once over with the sponge on the inside and then just rinsing the outside of the glasses and bowls and things. This is after the item would have been sitting in the sink overnight on top of dirty dishes and food and such. I don’t know if I have some sort of sensory issue or if I’m normal, but this is disgusting to me. The way I see it, the kitchen sink is going to be one of the dirtiest places especially if there’s plates of food in it, so If I were washing a cup or bowl I would feel the need to go over the inside a few times to make sure it’s clean AS WELL as going over the outside too. So I have gotten used to just washing my own cups even if they appear clean and put away before I use them.
When I have complained about this he says, well you could do the dishes instead. Which is a fair response. However, I am not the person who is filling our sink with food and garbage. That’s right, garbage! He will just throw his wrappers and joint roaches and food scraps directly into the sink and we do not have a garbage disposal. So this means whoever does the dishes that he has loaded up into the sink without scraping the food off will have to excavate through food and garbage that shouldn’t be in there. This again is absolutely disgusting to me and I absolutely hate the sensation of having to sort through wet food, and cut it out of the sink to carry it to the garbage. So I will just wash the dishes that are out of the sink and leave the ones he has placed in the sink for him to do himself. I have even said to him, if you just stack the dishes to the side of the sink instead of placing them in the sink to marinate with all the food and trash, I will happily wash them since that’s not gross to me and I don’t feel like I should have to excavate through things he just piled in there. I’ve basically just given up on ever cleaning the things in the sink because it disgusts me so much and I will just clean all the things that aren’t in the sink. There’s been times after he cleans the sink out after a few days that I will go to town deep cleaning the crevices in the sink and even pouring baking soda and vinegar down the drain to get rid of the food smells with the intention of us having a nice clean space, but he will go back to putting food in it so I don’t even try to keep the sink clean after deep cleaning it like that.
I think we must have different senses of what is gross and what’s not, because he clearly is not phased by the sink at all, and when he cups the wet food debris in his hand to walk to the garbage to dump it, it will be dribbling food water out of his hands onto the floor. He does not seem to be grossed out by this because he doesn’t care and always does this.
Today I was so frustrated when he went to kiss me and I said he had a runny nose, so he went to the towel that was hanging on the door nearby and just straight up WIPED HIS SNOTTY NOSE AND BLEW IT ON THE CLEAN TOWEL. I had literally washed the towel the other day and used it one time to dry off after a shower. I was appalled and said “ew why are you doing that” and he made a silly face and blew into it harder in a comical way as if to tease me or be funny but I was genuinely pissed. I said something like, “this is not funny to me, I’m actually annoyed” and he acted aloof and short with me when I wouldn’t let it go, asking him if he would do the laundry and wash some of the towels later since that was the last clean one.
It especially disgusts me bc the way he just automatically did it and then left the towel there hanging (instead of taking it down from the door and to the dirty clothes pile) tells me that he must do crap like that often and I don’t know. It makes me feel like I need to have my own separate towel that he doesn’t use, just so I can have a towel that i know is clean to use. I came home from a work trip the other day and saw that the towel he had been using had orange dots on it like some kind of food stain, I didn’t think much of it until today.
Another example of bad cleanliness: once I was on the toilet taking a dump, he came in and was joking/teasing me about how stinky it was (we were both laughing bc we tease each other like this) and he reached out and flushed the toilet while I was sitting on it. This is absolutely disgusting to me bc I instantly felt all the toilet water with my sh*t in it mist my ass and vag and everything in between. I was disgusted and hopped in the shower her and I thought he did it as a mean Prank knowing I could just shower off. But then I found it that apparently he just does that when he thinks he will need to flush more than once.
All of this suddenly made me realize why my boyfrien is always getting so many different infections. He has had some sort of skin infection in his buttcrack for several months if not over a year and went to th doctor but it never went away. He has also had some sort of wart problem on his d*ck that he got checked out and it ended up being a somewhat common fungal thing that kids get on their hands fro not washing and people get on their genitals too. So now that i know that he’s ok with using dirty towels and flushing poo water onto his own ass, it makes sense how he is having these problems. I even had a couple of yeast infections that I’m now not so surprised about.
I was always thankful that he is a tidy man and I felt bad for being a messy person, but it is just things like this that just make me go ICK that are causing me to feel so disgusted. When I have brought the issue with the dishes up in the past he has expressed that he feels I leave my things all over to the point where it encroaches on him and when he initially brought it up I was surprised but apologetic and I’ve been working on kieeping my things more separate and not leaving my clothes out and such. But when I bring up these things I am disgusted with or today when I was annoyed about the towel he acted like I was being annoying or too harsh or unfair.
So tell me Reddit, am I being a huge wimp with all of this? I know the food and sink things I’m probably being wimpy about, but also think it’s reasonable to not want food scraps and other random crap that doesn’t go in the sink. I also do think there’s a difference between being kind of messy and leaving some of my clothes out and doing things gross like that that in my opinion are degrading the cleanliness of our space and items.

Hi everyone, I am sort of at my wit's end here and would like some advice from fellow allergy sufferers. I've gone from doctor to doctor and feel like no one's taking me seriously.
I've always had severe hayfever. So severe that I could barely leave the house in summer because I would literally be chocking and coughing. I did 3 years of shots and daily anti-histamines and they barely scratched the surface. I've also had cats since I was 7 years old with no problems. My symptoms "magically" got a lot better around 2020/2021. Almost no sneezing, no eye irritation... However, that's also the time I developed some other weird symptoms. Most notably, repeated bouts of feeling like I'm choking, nausea to the point of not being able to eat, chronic coughing and chronic globus sensation. It seems to get triggered by sth (usually an allergy or an infection) and then gets chronic for 4-8 months, then subsides again before I get another "attack". I also have "attacks" of skin burning and yeast infections that started in the beginning of 2020 and which somehow seem to follow a similar pattern It got to the point in summer of 2022 where I was eating lunch at work and actually thought I was going to die. The nausea last winter caused me to rapidly lose a lot of weight in a short time span. And ever since adopting 2 cats 2 months ago, the choking and globus and coughing is back and very severe again. It also gets worse when I step a foot outside my home. Rehoming is an option at this point, however I don't think it's the cats alone that cause the symptoms since I also get the "attacks" just from pollen, from colds and had issues even when not living with a cat. So I want to try everything else before going down that avenue.
My question is: has anyone experienced something similar and found out what the hell's going on? I had an igE-test and it's below the critical level of 100. My eosinophiles are very low. I did another skin-prick allergy test which basically said I am still extremely allergic to basically all plants and mildly to cats. No food allergies except hazelnuts. I also did a gastroscopy, which showed a small hernia but nothing really of concern and most notably no eosinophilic esophagitis. I am already taking Bilaxten, Montelukast and pantoprazole on the daily and I feel like I am running out of options while my body's slowly giving in. I also have an auto-immune disorder and am starting to wonder if something else is going on. Anyway, any insights are HIGHLY appreciated!

I need opinions (I will speak to my doctors also). Sorry about the long post.
40yo Female
I had what seemed like a yeast infection or some type of bacterial infection shortly after sex in 2019, doctor said she could see sores inside and took tests for multiple things. These were the results for hsv:
feb 13, 2019 hsv 1+2 igm - 0.85 hsv 1+2 igg - <0.5
All other tests were negative including bacterial infection and yeast. Symptoms went away. She did not swab for HSV as she didn't think that was it (should have anyway I know, just back then I wasn't as informed).
In 2020 I had sex and then was having weird symptoms shortly after like visible pimples around my vagina more like folliculitis looking back now... but again I was not as informed and didn't test for hsv.
In 2023, I had a rare case of adult chickenpox, classic lesions all over my body just like a child version, wasn’t too bad just itchy and went away in a month. I mention because it’s also the herpesvirus.
Now, onto this year 2024. I had sex on February 1 with someone with unknown status (said he was negative for everything). Five days later I had a headache, slightly swollen lymph nodes, fatigue, aches that lasted a couple days and over the next few days I found pimples around my vagina, not terribly itchy or painful. They did not look like classic clustered herpes look but more like ingrown hairs on the front. A day or so more and I found small itchy white lesions around my anus that more resembled some hsv pictures I've seen. Also resembled the chickenpox from earlier just in an unfortunate location. I’ve never had direct sexual contact there in that place either.
I was out of the country at the time so didn't go right away to the doctor. I still had almost healed lesions when I got home on February 11, ten days post exposure. The doctor said it looks like herpes but it's too late and a swab wouldn't be accurate (maybe I should have pushed anyway).
Now since then I've had no more symptoms but I've taken 4 blood tests over 15 weeks (the latest a couple days ago, 15 weeks post exposure) and these are the results:
february 11, 2024 (10 days post exposure) hsv 1 igm - 0.53 hsv 1 igg - 0.48 hsv 2 igm - 0.55 hsv 2 igg - <0.5
march 2, 2024 (30 days/4.25 weeks, post exposure) hsv 1 igg - 0.41 hsv 1 igm - 0.65 hsv 2 igg - 0.81 hsv 2 igm - 0.68
april 7, 2024 (66 days/9.5 weeks post exposure) hsv 1+2 igg - <0.5 hsv 1+2 igm - 0.7
may 18, 2024 (107 days/15.25 weeks post exposure) hsv 1+2 igg - <0.5 hsv 1+2 igm - 0.86
I'm not sure why I was tested hsv 1 and 2 together the last two but I went through one of the best blood labs in my country who use CLIA and ELISA tests so I know it's reliable.
As you can see the igg antibodies are fluctuating up and down and always negative. If this was truly herpes, wouldn't the igg at least trend up over these 15 weeks?
The iGm is increasing slightly but over 15 weeks would I still be getting iGm antibodies? I thought those only last for a few weeks post new infection.
Should I accept negative and move on even though I clearly had suspicious symptoms? What else could all my symptoms have been?
Does my immune system affect the tests? Meaning if I think I have a weak immune system (the reason I would get adult chickenpox) could this mean HSV antibodies aren’t growing like they should?
I kind of want another similar outbreak so I can swab and know once and for all. My country does not have easy access to the western blot test.
I know there might not be a lot of doctors here but sometimes you guys seem more informed than they do.
What can I do?

Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road
With all the Leaper activity outside there was nothing else to do but sit and think. So Rene did just that. But the more he thought, the worse things seemed to get.
The Fleet had no idea what they were walking into. There were entire nations of these humanoid monsters out here, and all of them made the Amits look like cuddly pets in comparison. He had to warn them. No one else could. His entire platoon and all of Mound 13’s scientists were gone. He alone could forestall disaster and avert the coming slaughter.
If only he could make the long trek home. But that would mean days if not weeks of moving through enemy-infested territory. Untold thousands of Leapers stood between him and the edge of the world as the Fleet understood it.
Even if he did warn the Fleet in time, there was no guarantee that they could withstand the world-altering forces he had encountered out here. If the Vitalus was a real being, a demon from the ancient world, then there was one thing which could rival its power.
The Divine Engine.
But that old heap was now rusting under the suns all the way back at Mound Euler. Besides, something inside it had given out, a malfunction maybe. Rene wasn’t a qualified Antiquarian, so he couldn’t even begin to guess how to get the thing working again.
If I’d had an ounce of sense in me back then, I would’ve walked that hulk back to the Fleet where brighter minds than mind could get more use out of it, Rene thought bitterly. He had thrown away the most significant scientific and historical find in living history on a pointless gesture of vengeance. Granted, he’d wiped out an entire omega-class mound singlehandedly, but if the eggheads back home had been able to piece the damned thing together…
Anyway, it was no use crying over spilt jelly now. His mind switched to his more immediate problems. He had less than three days before he ran out of fungicidal doses. His wounds were shallow but numerous. Once they became infested with parasitic molds, inflammation and fever would soon follow, ending with the condition they called the ‘baker’s shakes’, a rapid deterioration of motor functions in the afflicted areas.
Despair and his wavering sense of duty roiled within him. Any one of the aforementioned factors would have made his mission untenable. Put them all together like this, and it all seemed nigh impossible.
But the biggest problem of them all was squatting a few inches away from Rene, her yellowish eyes shining in the gloom.
You’ve done all that you can for her, above and beyond what is required of an officer of the Fleet, Rene told himself. Enemy combatants—human combatants—are supposed to be afforded the same level of care that a soldier could expect for himself. The issue was that he could barely fend for himself out here, much less babysit a prisoner who would like nothing better than to stick him when his back was turned.
She was a liability that he couldn’t afford. He would be doing himself and the Fleet a favor by ridding himself of that liability. Zildiz noticed him looking at her and thrust out her chin impudently. Rene felt a flash of irritation, his mind seizing on it like a drowning man clutching at anything to stay afloat.
The irritation grew into a bright, senseless rage. All at once he became convinced that she was the cause and culprit of all his suffering. Without her slowing him down at every turn, he would at least stand a chance of at making it back home, though with the onset of infections the trip would certainly cost him his life.
You first, Rene thought, eying Zildiz hatefully. He clenched his fists, fingernails digging white furrows into his palms. Zildiz shifted in her seat, the change in her body language slight but unmistakable. With a pang of guilt Rene realized that she knew exactly what he was thinking.
You’ve already killed once in the name of the greater good, Rene thought, and Lethway died for nothing that day. Can you honestly bear to make that choice again?
Rene cleared his throat and began noisily sorting through his gear, turning out the contents of his survival kit and cataloguing them again.
Zildiz did not relax in the slightest, watching closely as he took out the artefacts which he hadn’t been able to identify and examining them one by one.
He first looked over the obsidian slate. Rene turned it over in his hands and felt the smooth surface, pressing it firmly with his knuckles and rapping it. He found two curious holes in its side and stuck his pinky finger in them, felt cold nubs of metal inside. Nothing happened, so he put the slate down and started fiddling with the bowl that had a dirty great spike sticking out the center of it. He extended the tripod at its base and set it up, then waiting.
Again, nothing happened. Rene began to feel like seven kinds of idiot until he discovered a pair of rubbery cords dangling form the base of the tripod. They had three metal prongs sticking out of their ends. In a flash of inspiration Rene recalled the strange holes he had found in the slate. Carefully he fitted the pronged cords into the openings. There was a smooth click as the prongs found purchase and locked in, the cords matching the holes perfectly in diameter and shape. Rene stood back and looked on with bated breath, sure that he had just made a discovery of historic proportions.
Even Zildiz started taking an interest in his doings. After a moment, she said:
“You have no idea what these tools are for, do you?”
“Don’t be absurd,” Rene said haughtily, “This process just takes a while. You have to find the right harmonies,” he added in his most mysterious tone.
“Right harmonies for what, exactly?” she asked next, sounding skeptical.
At a loss for words, Rene folded his arms and grumpily retreated to his corner of the lair. But as he withdrew, Rene quite unintentionally allowed a beam of soft light from his spyhole to enter the darkened space, whereupon it happened to shine on the obsidian slate he’d laid on the floor. Suddenly the spiked bowl began to rotate on its tripod, compelled by some unseen force.
“For that!” Rene said happily. For once Zildiz had no biting remarks to add. They watched the bowl spin on its axis until Rene got bored and tried another experiment. He covered the spyhole with the palm of his hand. The rotations of the bowl immediately slowed and came to a stop. Rene then removed his hand, and after a moment it started to spin again. In addition, an inscription winked into existence on the upper left corner of the slate. Rene leaned in and read the following:
“EXOCOM network unavailable. Please try again later.”
Rene rubbed his chin and pondered the incomprehensible message. What on earth was a network? It sounded like some kind of fishing implement.
Zildiz on the other hand said nothing, but noted the clueless look on her captor’s face. She understood the message all too well. The tool was trying to contact someone or something out there. Like her, the device was was having problems raising a signal on the relevant frequencies. She reached for her magnetosynaptic organ and searched through her audible spectrum, going over it with a fine-toothed comb until she found the source of the only radio activity she could sense: the spinning bowl itself. She listened in and realized that it was transmitting a repeating message in some garbled parscode so dense with information she didn’t dare begin unravelling it.
She did, however, commit its frequency to her memory. It would come in handy if ever the Vitalus wished to track down the intended recipients of the message.
Meanwhile, Rene had thought of a new experiment. He picked up the hollow sphere and saw to his delight that it also had the same pair of holes at its bottom, identical to the ones on the spinning bowl. He transferred the cords and connected the slate to the sphere.
The device took a long time in responding, but Rene’s earlier success was fresh on his mind and he would not be discouraged. He even scraped away the sides of the spyhole until it was wide enough to put his arm through.
“More light means more power,” he hypothesized aloud. He also had another theory about the shapes of the artefacts themselves. A sphere, a bowl and a rectangle, all of them perfect geometric shapes. Coincidence? He thought not! There was a secret harmony of mathematics woven into all this sorcery, he could just feel it.
Rene’s faith was rewarded a few minutes later when the sphere started showing rings of soft blue fluorescence. But his amazement reached orgasmic proportions when the sphere sprouted a set of spiky legs and began to roll itself around the floor of the burrow, still attached to the slate.
“Initiating vitals scan. Please remain still,” it warbled in a young boy’s voice. Zildiz backed away from it as far as she could manage in the tight confines, treating it as if it were a poisonous viper. The blue circles began to emit strobing flashes of light that dazzled Rene’s eyes. It was rather like those chemical picture boxes where you had to sit stone-still for hours before the image could develop properly.
“Scan complete. Hullo there!” the sphere happily giggled, “How can I help?”
“Oh, wise spirit of the sphere,” Rene solemnly intoned, still intending to impress Zildiz with superiority of the Fleet’s ways, “Hear our prayers.”
“Aw, shucks,” said the sphere. It spoke with a whimsical twang that was like no accent Rene had ever heard, “You charmer, you! You can just call me E.X.A.R., since we’re friends. Or just plain Ex if you’re into that whole brevity thing.”
“Exar?” Rene repeated.
“Sure! Stands for Extravehicular Advisory Robot. My sole purpose is to keep you happy and healthy. Give us the sitrep, chief.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“The lowdown, tailo. The long and the short of it.”
Rene looked to Zildiz for help but saw that she was too busy pressing herself against the sides of the burro and squirming like mad. It was the first time he’d ever seen her show fear, and he didn’t know what to make of it.
“Well see, your crash suit indicates that you’ve suffered some minor lacerations and contusions. Nothing major—though your brain wave patterns suggest that you ain’t been getting much sleep. Everything alright?”
“Erm. To be perfectly honest with you, Mr. Exar, no. Everything is not alright.”
The sphere uttered a sympathetic whistle and went the color of cream pastel.
“I’m so sorry to hear that. What seems to be the problem?”
Zildiz moaned:
“It is a simulacrum! A silicate soul of the Betrayers!”
“Tranquilo, mes amigos,” Exar urged, “Let’s simmer down a spell and figure this out.”
He rolled about to face her and once more emitted the flashing pulses, Zildiz covering her face with her hands and letting out a frightened shriek.
“Okeydokey,” Exar said briskly, “We need to get this lady over to a trauma center pronto. And I mean ASAP! We’re gonna need to fly her to a team of specialists who can surgically remove that parasite that’s latched onto her.”
“You know someone who can do that?” Rene said in disbelief.
“Of course! Exodus Industries has hardened bases all over this solar system, fully equipped and staffed. We’ll have your lady friend up and running in no time.”
“And you can take us to one of those bases?”
“You kidding? We’ll be cruising first class in an interplanetary shuttle in two shakes of a dog’s whiskers! Heck, I’m already hailing our ride.”
Rene hopes flared into life. The gods were real, in a moment the spirit of the sphere would summon them forth!
Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road

Hello, please excuse my formatting, for I'm still new to this. But I am looking for advice, ANY advice
I (M/23), am currently living with my large family My Father (M/45), My Mother (F/43), My Sister (F/27), my Brother (M/24), and the problem of this story, my disabled Brother (M/26), who has Autism. For the story, we'll call him Terry
My brother Terry has been born with a severe case of autism, which practically makes his mind that of a toddler, and like a toddler, he'll throw tantrums and scream... A lot
For some examples, he'll throw his toy cars on the floor if he's in a bad mood, and will literally screech at the top of his lungs if he can't find the one he wants. And with him being a fully grown man, it's very loud, and his strength usually breaks the toys, which only makes him more upset..
He was obviously easy to handle with at a Young age, but as Terry grew older, he became harder and harder to control,. My family has tried everything throughout the years, we tried normal timeouts, a stern talking while explaining what he did wrong, taking away his things, grounding him, smacking his butt, etc. But now it's almost impossible, he's now a fully grown man who has muscles and is taller than some of us. (My guess is that he got into so many tantrum fueled fights that his body grew muscle) And to make matters worse, he's been punching holes in the walls as well as actively putting his hands on us, and being a grown man with muscles as I've stated, they do damage. He's even sent my Father to the hospital on numerous occasions (fractured bone or biting him so hard it leaves a nasty infection)
And things are only getting worse, as his fits grow more and more intense, to the point he's doing them daily, even late at night around 3am. I had to sleep on the couch as we are forced to share the same room, and he would scream at the top of his lungs because he can't sleep (We're not the richest people around)
He even does it when nobody or anything is bothering him! He could be eating his favorite food after a nice, relaxing day with no hiccups, and he'll just start again as if someone told him every swear in the book..
His personality isn't all that better either, as he would yell at my Father to STFU in his face whenever he tries to scold him, eat and waste the snacks and food we bring home, then throw a fit when there's none left, ask for stuff like a Nintendo Switch, right after punching ANOTHER hole in the wall as if nothing had happened, Steal our games and snacks, etc. The walls look as if a wrecking ball has smashed through multiple parts of our house
It's gotten to the point where we're walking around eggshells around him, we can't even breathe right before he starts up for the 5th time that day, and I am not exaggerating. I've experienced many breakdowns and injuries because of it, and same with the rest of my family. I can't be left alone with him because it'll always result in fists flying..
And to make things worse, our Dogs (A RottweilePitbull Mix, and a Golden RetrieveJack Russel Terrier Mix) began barking and biting him whenever he starts attacking us.. They're obviously trying to protect us, but they leave some nasty bite marks, and they figured out how to break out of the cage to specifically go at him. They're trained and everything, it's just that Terry's so naturally aggressive that they feel threatened and feel as though they need to protect the rest of us, and our home
So not only are Terry's tantrums hurting us and our house, it's also hurting himself too, and I don't know what to do anymore. My Grandmother recommended to take him to the hospital to get a proper diagnosis as to what's causing the issue, and potentially getting him some medication to try to soothe his Bipolar disorder, but my Dad is worried
Mainly because when he fights with us, we're almost always forced to defend ourselves, and he doesn't know when to stay down, which results in bruises. We of course tried to calm him down without violence, like pinning him down safely on the floor until he's calmer, but even that isn't working, and he can overpower us now, so it's no longer on the table.. On top of that and the Dog attacks, my Dad is worried if he DOES take him to the Hospital, they'll call the police and he'll get arrested for abuse, even when I explain that we could always discuss with the Doctor that he's actively getting himself hurt.
So instead, my parents will baby him, as to them, its easier to tame him by giving him what he wants. But it's obviously putting a bandaid over a bullet wound, and I, and my Siblings actively protest them doing this, even my Mother thinks it's bad now, but my Dad remains stubborn, saying it's the best we could do as we can't always keep hurting him when the fights, which I obviously understand, but babying him only makes the situation worse. And the other option is giving him gummies that calm him down, but either they don't work, or it's only a temporary fix until they wear off.
I know some people would say to simply move out of the house, but I'm currently working part-time at a grocery store, I barely have enough money to go and get a place of my own, though it's not from a lack of trying. We live near our grandparents, but they don't have room in their house for another person either, and I don't have my license (My Dad never bothered to teach me)
Even as I'm typing this out now, Terry is currently having his 5th tantrum this MORNING, simply because we're breathing the air wrong. So please, any and all advice is very appreciated and much needed.. Because this can't go on, both for our safety and more importantly, his own safety
TLDR: My Disabled Brother is so aggressive that he's actively hurting us and himself, we've tried everything and it never seems to be enough, please help

Story time My girlfriend in her last relationship got this little man at 8 weeks. That relationship ended for her with a beautiful daughter the loss of her best friend(the doggo) and a lot of pain and heartache. When they broke up she couldn’t take the pup with her to her family’s house where she was living now that she moved out of the home she and her ex lived at so she has no other choice but to let her ex keep him.
Her ex wasnt what you call civil, after the break up. His continuing physical violence toward the mother of his child lost his visitation rights with his daughter and eventually wound him up in prison.
His crackhead mother ended up with the dog and couldnt care for him or his brother(yes there was two i never met the other) she neglected them and the brother ended up dying from the heat and dehydration when she thought it was smart to leave the two dogs locked outside in the heat for 6 hours while she went out.
Instead of giving the dog over to my now girlfriend she told my gf that if she assisted in helping her POS son get out of prison then she could have her dog back. The case was in the hands of the DA at that point and even if my girl wanted to she had no say in the case anymore and couldn’t even get him out if she tried.
So then his mother assured her he went to a good home. So then why did my girlfriend after spending 7months searching online and going down endless rabbit holes find her dog with the help of #pawboost when a lady messaged her saying he was spotted in a damn homeless encampment on a well known drug infested homeless encampment nearby.
Fast foward to now. We’ve had him about a week and hes such a good boy but I’ve never owned a dog and definitely wasnt prepared neither financially nor mentally cause I’ve found a best friend not knowing i was looking for one. His first vet trip cost $500 and that was just to find out his liver enzymes are high, his alergies have been neglected, and his ears are infected. Weve got him on antibiotics and were doing the best we can. Keeping him fed and loved. I just dont see how someone could live with themselves putting this dog through all of that.
The homeless couple who we found him with abused and neglected him just like my gfs exes family did before they decided drive to this street lined with drug addicts, homeless people, and criminals and open the car door and dump this innocent dude on the side of the road. It’s just fuckin sad.

First of all, thank you for reading my post about this. So I (f) have been in a relationship with my bf (m) since 3 1/2 years. We've been living together since 2 1/2 years. Since roundabout 2 years he's been having symptoms down there and I encouraged him to go to the doctor from day one. He went there and his first initial diagnosis was a yeast infection, he then was treated but different symptoms started to come up. He then went to the doctor again and was diagnosed with a skin infection. Also was treated. A few weeks later, he gets symptoms again, went to the doctors again, got treated again. So this cycle of symptoms, diagnosis, treatment has been going on for around two years. I have been by his side and tried to be there for him as good as I can/could. Fast forward to 2 weeks ago. He get's symptoms again, no surprise, but this time he has a weird discharge and pain. I urged him to go to the hospital. He then got a swap and was diagnosed with gonorrhea. They gave and infused him antibiotics and he was sent home. When he told me l immediately got tested and it was negative. Mind you, we didn't really have sex for the past two years. So l wasn't really surprised. As any sane person I asked him where he might have that Std from, but he kinda dodged the question at first and started talking about his mental health. I am kinda hardheaded and kept asking him but he swore he hasn't gone outside of our relationship. I don't really know what think or do... Any advice on this?

Expected to be a straightforward procedure. No complications anticipated.
And he’s in the best place for it. Trauma care there considered the best in the region. It was where Mother was taken after her accident, and the care she received was top shelf.
She’d developed a life-threatening general infection that was resisting antibiotics after her surgeries. Hanging in the balance for three days and nights with a high fever that wouldn’t abate, in induced coma. Multiple fractures in her right leg and left shoulder. Broken ribs. Ruptured spleen that had to be removed. Broken pelvis. Head trauma and swelling of the brain. Not easy on a woman of 77. Had had several small strokes previously, and a broken hip replaced a year ago.
And the officers in the PD car that had hit her had tried to move her out of the street until witnesses with a little more sense had made them stop.
The surgeon who had performed the abdominal surgery had opened her up again, though she hadn’t wanted to after all she’d already been through. Afraid she might have missed something. She hadn’t.
Her Pastor was an old retired Marine who walked slowly with a cane and the assistance of his wife. Old injuries sustained in Vietnam. He’d gone to see her, and had laid hands on and prayed over her, as well. A few hours later the fever broke, and two days after that she was out of the ICU and making her nurses’ lives miserable, complaining about the food she was being given: “I wouldn’t feed this to my dog.”
Demanding that I go down to the hospital cafeteria and bring her back some cheeseburgers and chocolate cake. Questioning my loyalty when I refused.
Her Pastor died himself two weeks later. In idle moments, I’ve sometimes wondered if he didn’t pass the last of his vitality to her. The places that your mind goes.
“Lost the thing that changes the channels again, OP. There it is - dropped it on the floor. Gonna have a certain annoying nurse paged and make her get it for me.”
Talked about people we used to know. A girl who’d been so badly beaten by a group of girls in high school that she dropped out rather than return.
Another who’d beaten the two girls who’d jumped Her.
The cheeseburgers our Uncle used to make at his drive-in back home. The maybe Technically armed robbery he’d committed against two customers once. Nobody argues with a .45.
They had done an eat and run the last time they’d been there, though, and he’d been a little annoyed (suggested a Very generous tip for his waitress would be in order, as well).
Just passing the time.
Eventually, Z: “Gonna go now, OP. Playoffs are coming’ on, thank God. Won’t have to use a window after all. Did I tell you it’s boring here?”
“You might’ve mentioned it. You got this, you know. As much as Medicos hedge their bets as to telling a patient how it’ll be, if they say there’ll be no problem there won’t be.”
“Yeah, no sweat. But whatEver was to happen, I’m cool with it, know what I’m sayin’? Love you, Bro. Talk to you after, if I ain’t too doped up.”
“Love you, too, Z.”
Dude’s on home dialysis, takes insulin, has a bad heart, gangrene, takes twenty-six different pills a day (thought it was 18), and can still gum a good steak to death (takes his dentures Out to eat - thinks it’s funny). And still laughing at the world. Don’t expect he’ll ever change.
X is waiting at the hospital - gonna let us know when the thing is done. Just waiting on the word.

First of all, thank you for reading my post about this. So I (22 f) have been in a relationship with my bf (26 m) since 3 1/2 years. We've been living together since 2 1/2 years. Since roundabout 2 years he's been having symptoms down there and I encouraged him to go to the doctor from day one.
He went there and his first initial diagnosis was a yeast infection, he then was treated but different symptoms started to come up. He then went to the doctor again and was diagnosed with another infection. Also was treated. A few weeks later, he gets symptoms again, went to the doctors again, got treated again. So this cycle of symptoms, diagnosis, treatment has been going on for around two years. I have been by his side and tried to be there for him as good as I can/could.
Fast forward to 2 weeks ago. He get's symptoms again, no surprise, but this time he has a weird discharge and pain. I urged him to go to the hospital. He then got a swap and was diagnosed with gonorrhea. They gave and infused him antibiotics and he was sent home. When he told me l immediately got tested and it was negative.
Mind you, we didn't really have sex for the past two years. So l wasn't really surprised.
As any sane person I asked him where he might have that Std from, but he kinda dodged the question at first and started talking about his mental health. I am kinda hardheaded and kept asking him but he swore he hasn't gone outside of our relationship.
I don't really know what think or do...
Any advice on this?

Edit: almost all of the comments are saying to surrender my dog. As hard it is to do I have no choice but do it for my dogs sake. Thank you all for the comments suggesting it. I will carry him to the nearest vet as soon as possible to let everyone be at east. Thank you all
Note: the ticks keep coming back because our house... Is you can say "needs improvement" Or something like that.
I don't know where to put this, so I've been posting these on multiple subreddits. But all of my searches on google ends up going nowhere or isn't even related to what my dog is having.
My dog has been having a hard time breathing, we noticed this and searched for possible causes and thought it was parvo or something. So we gave him home remedies to help cure him.
But as days passed nothing worked so we kept giving him home remedies. But my sister checked his nose and opened it to see LOTS of ticks inside it's nose, as in 4-5 ticks in each nose socket.
We don't know what to do. We search how to treat ticks but almost all of them will not work. We can't leave the ticks to feed and become big enough to fall out, because it will only make my dog have trouble breathing more.
We have no idea what to do, going to the vet isn't an option since we aren't financially stable ourselves, to the point where we can't afford to eat most days.
We tried removing the ticks with twizzers and that flea removal tool, but our dog isn't keen to the idea. We only managed to pull out only ONE tick from all that effort. There's no point in doing it again since my dog is now growling at me when going near him with tweezers.
Our only option is to use a muzzle so that he can't bite us while we try to remove the ticks.
Any suggestions or possibly home treatments that we can use will be very much appreciated.
We are really out of options aside from the muzzle idea.

Edit: almost all of the comments are saying to surrender my dog. As hard it is to do I have no choice but do it for my dogs sake. Thank you all for the comments suggesting it. I will carry him to the nearest vet as soon as possible to let everyone be at east. Thank you all
Note: the ticks keep coming back because our house... Is you can say "needs improvement" Or something like that.
I don't know where to put this, so I've been posting these on multiple subreddits. But all of my searches on google ends up going nowhere or isn't even related to what my dog is having.
My dog has been having a hard time breathing, we noticed this and searched for possible causes and thought it was parvo or something. So we gave him home remedies to help cure him.
But as days passed nothing worked so we kept giving him home remedies. But my sister checked his nose and opened it to see LOTS of ticks inside it's nose, as in 4-5 ticks in each nose socket.
We don't know what to do. We search how to treat ticks but almost all of them will not work. We can't leave the ticks to feed and become big enough to fall out, because it will only make my dog have trouble breathing more.
We have no idea what to do, going to the vet isn't an option since we aren't financially stable ourselves, to the point where we can't afford to eat most days.
We tried removing the ticks with twizzers and that flea removal tool, but our dog isn't keen to the idea. We only managed to pull out only ONE tick from all that effort. There's no point in doing it again since my dog is now growling at me when going near him with tweezers.
Our only option is to use a muzzle so that he can't bite us while we try to remove the ticks.
Any suggestions or possibly home treatments that we can use will be very much appreciated.
We are really out of options aside from the muzzle idea.

Edit: almost all of the comments are saying to surrender my dog. As hard it is to do I have no choice but do it for my dogs sake. Thank you all for the comments suggesting it. I will carry him to the nearest vet as soon as possible to let everyone be at east. Thank you all
I don't know where to put this, so I've been posting these on multiple subreddits. But all of my searches on google ends up going nowhere or isn't even related to what my dog is having.
My dog has been having a hard time breathing, we noticed this and searched for possible causes and thought it was parvo or something. So we gave him home remedies to help cure him.
But as days passed nothing worked so we kept giving him home remedies. But my sister checked his nose and opened it to see LOTS of ticks inside it's nose, as in 4-5 ticks in each nose socket.
We don't know what to do. We search how to treat ticks but almost all of them will not work. We can't leave the ticks to feed and become big enough to fall out, because it will only make my dog have trouble breathing more.
We have no idea what to do, going to the vet isn't an option since we aren't financially stable ourselves, to the point where we can't afford to eat most days.
We tried removing the ticks with twizzers and that flea removal tool, but our dog isn't keen to the idea. We only managed to pull out only ONE tick from all that effort. There's no point in doing it again since my dog is now growling at me when going near him with tweezers.
Our only option is to use a muzzle so that he can't bite us while we try to remove the ticks.
Any suggestions or possibly home treatments that we can use will be very much appreciated.
We are really out of options aside from the muzzle idea.

EXECUTIVE NOTE: I posted June-August in the wrong sub.
[SEPTEMBER]
Week 1, September 2001
——
◆Business Notes
Due to forced cost cutting measures, Production values have been dropped to High Quality a saving of $25k. Live Event Experience has also been dropped to Large. Broadcast Quality has dropped from Industry Standard to In House at a saving of $37,500.
[9.1 WCW NITRO!] “THE TITLE IS VACANT”
[Macon, Georgia] Who will be crowned WCW World Heavyweight Champion
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Macon City Auditorium, GA, in front of 2,445
Overall Rating 64
Scott Steiner beats Diamond Dallas Page to become the new Untied States Heavyweight Champion, (Dallas falls in his 4thdefence). Steiner will now be included in the Wrestle War main event.
Vampiro & Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark) beat Billy Funn, Curt Hennig and Buff Bagwell.
Nash and Goldberg trade insults in the ring hyping their match at Wrestle War
Goldberg beat Rick Steiner
Rob Van Dam bumps into Scott Steiner backstage. Steiner promises he'll be in the World Title match at Wrestle War.
A video plays hyping Goldberg v Kevin Nash III at Wrestle War
Sting wishes DDP luck, he defends his US title against Scott Steiner in the main event
Konnan beat Mark Jindrak
Bam Bam Bigelow beat Chavo Guerroro Jr
Ric Flair & Dustin Rhodes - the Legacy are backstage, disappointed they are not getting a shot at Wrestle War for the WCW World Title. They want a Tag Title match next week
Kevin Nash beat Hugh Morrus
Eric Bischoff is with Tajiri & James Mitchell confirming he will be in the World Title match at Wrestle War, but he will defend the WCW Cruiserweight title against Super Crazy next week, if Crazy becomes champion he will be in the Wrestle War match.
Rob Van Dam & Sabu beat Shane Douglas & Jeff Jarrett to retain the WCW World Tag Team Championships (second defence)
La Parka & Damien 666 beat Tommy Dreamer & Shane Helms
WCW President Eric Bischoff and the Championship Committee (Roddy Piper, Arn Anderson, Ricky Steamboat, Terry Funk) and Director of Talent Acquisition Dusty Rhodes announce that Booker T has suffered. Serious injury and the WCW World Heavyweight Title is vacant. A new champion will be crowned at Wrestle War in a five way match featuring all the current WCW Champions.
◆Show Notes
Volador Jr was again fined for poor behaviour backstage
Brian Adams phoned in his performance in the six man tag match
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a 0.11 TV Rating with 86,762 viewers and 1,421,978 viewers overall.
◆ "WRESTLE WAR!" [CARD SO FAR]
Fit Finlay v Sabu v Rob Van Dam v Yoshihiro Tajiri v Scott Steiner - For vacant WCW World Heavyweight Title
Goldberg v Kevin Nash - The Final Encounter
*Current WCW Champions will be in the match, match subject to change based on title matches
◆Business Notes
Due to forced cost cutting measures, Production values have been dropped to High Quality a saving of $25k. Live Event Experience has also been dropped to Large. Broadcast Quality has dropped from Industry Standard to In House at a saving of $37,500.
[9.7 WCW NITRO!] “CHAMPIONS UNDER ATTACK”
[Sacremento, California] Three title matches on the line
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Sacremento Community Center, CA in front of 2,175
Overall Rating 65
Rob Van Dam & Sabu beat The Legacy (Ric Flair & Dustin Rhodes) to retainn the WCW Tag Team Titles (defence three). Damien 666 & La Parka attacked The Legacy during the match
A video plays hyping Goldberg v Nash III
Fit Finlay beats Bam Bam Bigelow to retain the WCW World Television Title (fourth defence)
Diamond Dallas Page & Sting beat Totally Buff (Lex Luger & Buff Bagwell)
Goldberg and Kevin Nash cut promos in the ring ahead of their match at Wrestle War
Goldberg destroys Evan Karagias
Sting and Diamond Dallas Page attack Lance Storm and Mike Awesome
Rick Steiner & Scott Steiner attack Rob Van Dam backstage
Vampiro & Kevin Nash beat EZ Money & Vilano V
Yoshihiro Tajiri beat Super Crazy to retain the WCW Cruiserweight Title (defence number one)
Jeff Jarrett beat Silver King
Mike Awesome beat Brian Adams
Lance Storm and Reno Mero get in the face of Sting backstage
The announcers run down three title matches, all could have implications for the Wrestle War main event where WCW Champions compete to crown the new WCW World Champion. The matches are Tajiri v Super Crazy (WCW Cruiserweight), Fit Finlay v Bam Bam Bigelow (WCW TV) and Ric Flair & Dustin Rhodes v Rob Van Dam & Sabu (WCW Tag)
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown to a TV rating of 0.12 with 90,530 viewers with 1,460,037 viewers overall.
Week 3, September 2001
——
[9.14 WCW NITRO!]
[Birmingham, Alabama]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
BJCC Hall, AL in front of 2,667
Overall Rating 64
Sting & Diamond Dallas Page confronted Lance Storm & Mike Awesome to close the show
Ric Flair beat Billy Gunn
Kevin Nash beat Buff Bagwell
Kevin Nash and Goldberg went toe to toe with the microphone
Jeff Jarrett beat Konnan
Rob Van Dam beat Hugh Morrus
Lance Storm & Mike Awesome beat Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark)
Rob Van Dam and Scott Steiner brawled backstage
Shane Douglas, Steiner Brothers beat Kaz Hayashi, Yang and Lash Leroux
WCW President Eric Bischoff spoke with Ric Flair, Dustin Rhodes, Damien 666 and La Parka ahead of their match at Wrestle War
Yoshihiro Tajiri defeated Chavo Guerrero Jr (defence number two) for the WCW Cruiserweight title
Diamond Dallas Page beat Lex Luger
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a rating of 0.11 86,384 viewers with 1,441,142 viewers overall
[9.20 WRESTLE WAR!]
[Greenville, North Carolina]
◆”Wrestle War” Pay Per View
Williams Arena, NC in front of 13,430
Overall Rating 67
Goldberg beat Kevin Nash
Goldberg is seen leaving his locker room and heading to the ring
Rob Van Dam celebrates his title in the ring
Rob Van Dam beats Sabu, Fit Finlay, Scott Steiner, and Yoshihiro Tajiri to become the new WCW World Heavyweight Champion
Nash is getting ready backstage
Rich Flair and Dustin Rhodes beat La Parka & Damien 666
A video hypes Goldberg v Nash III
Sting & Diamond Dallas Page beat Lance Storm & Mike Awesome
Dusty Rhodes beat Terry Funk
Gene Okerlund interviews Don Callis, La Parka and Damien 666
A music video hypes the team of Sting and DDP
Curt Hennig and Billy Gunn beat Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark)
Rob Van Dam and Sabu get into a confrontation with the Steiner Brothers
Rey Misterio Jr beat Buff Bagwell
Bam Bam Bigelow, Tommy Dreamer and Vampiro beat Shane Douglas, Jeff Jarrett and Lex Luger
Bill Alfonso, Sabu and RVD cut a promo on the Steiner Brothers
TAKA Michinoku, Chavo Guerrero Jr, EZ Money and Vilano V beat Shane Helms, Jamie Knoble, Lizmark Jr and Super Crazy
Roddy Piper tries to talk Dusty Rhodes and Terry Funk out of fighting
Announcers plug the two main events Fit Finlay v Sabu v Rob Van Dam v Scott Steiner v Tajiri for the vacant World Title and Goldberg v Nash III
◆Show Notes
Hugh Morrus was fined due to a behavioural incident
◆Business Notes
WCW Wrestle War got a pay per view buy rate of 0.13 with 67,575 buys
WCW Wrestle War was shown to an international TV audience with a rating of 0.12 with 91,555 viewers with 172,392 viewers overall
Week 4, September 2001
——
[9.26 WCW NITRO!]
[Geenville, Mississippi]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Washington County Center, MP in front of 2,588
Overall Rating 59
Sting & Goldberg beat Fit Finlay and Ultimo Dragon
Diamond Dallas Page beat Billy Gunn
Goldberg is getting ready backstage
Dustin Rhodes beat Kanyon
Fit Finlay attacked Vampiro backstage
Rob Van Dam beat Lance Storm in a non-title match
Ric Flair, Dustin Rhodes had a confrontation backstage.
Rey Misterio Junior and Kevin Nash exchanged words backstage
Totally Buff (Leg Luger & Buff Bagwell) beat Norman Smiley & Jamie Knoble
Rey Misterio Jr beat Rick Steiner
Jeff Jarrett beat Sabu
Goldberg and Sting cut a promo about how they were teaming tonight
Rob Van Dam and Scott Steiner faced off in the ring
Mike Awesome beat Konnan
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown to a rating of 0.11 with 86,566 viewers with 1,3879,551 viewers overall
[OCTOBER]
Week 1, October 2001
//END OF MONTH REPORT
◆Company Info
Size Small, second in the world
Next Event Halloween Havoc (pay per view)
TV Shows: WCW Nitro (Monday)
◆Financial Summary
Revenue 1.8m
Wages ($2,3m)
Of Which Are Terminations (0k) ⬇️ $13k
Loss ($2.6m) ⬇️600k
Performance ($855k) ⬆️ 445k
Reserves $3.8m
[FACE]
Singles
Alex Wright
Bam Bam Bigelow
Billy Kidman w/Tygress
Booker T
Brazo de Platino
Diamond Dallas Page
Goldberg
Great Sasuke
Hugh Morris
James Mitchell
Jamie Knoble
Kevin Nash
Konnan w/Tygress
Lash Leroux
Lizmark Jr
Norman Smiley
Rey Misterio Jr w/Tygress
Rob Van Dam - WCW World Heavyweight Champion, WCW World Tag Team Champion
Sabu w/Bill Alfonso - WCW World Tag Team Champion
Shane Helms -
Silver King
Sting
Super Crazy
Tommy Dreamer
Vampiro
Volador Jr
Yoshiro Tajiri - WCW Cruiserweight Champion
Tag Teams
Air Raid (AJ Styles & Air Paris)
Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark)
Legacy (Dustin Rhodes & Ric Flair)
Jung Dragons (Yang & Kaz Hayashi)
[HEEL]
Singles
Buff Bagwell
Cash
Chavo Guerrero Jr
Christopher Daniels
Curt Hennig
Damien 666 w/Don Callis
Elix Skipper
EZ Money
Fit Finlay - WCW World Television Champion
James Storm
Kanyon w/Bobby Henan
Kid Romeo
La Parka
Lex Luger
Mark Jindrak
Mike Sanders
Rick Steiner
Scott Steiner w/Midajah - WCW United States Heavyweight Champion
Shane Douglas
TAKA Michinoku
Ultimo Dragon
Vilano V w/Stacy Keibler
Tag Teams
Team Canada (Lance Storm w/Rena Mero & Mike Awesome)
3 Count (Evan Karagias & Shannon Moore)
◆Unavailable
Sid Vicious - Leg Break 7 Months, 2 weeks
Booker T - Frontal Bone Fracture - 11 months, 2 weeks
Lizmark Jr - Staph Infection - 25 days
◆Personalities
Arn Anderson - Member of the Championship Committee
Eric Bischoff - OwnePresident
Dusty Rhodes - Director Talent Acquisition
Roddy Piper - Member of the Championship Committee
Ricky Steamboat - Member of the Championship Committee
Terry Funk - Member of the Championship Committee / Part Time Wrestler
Larry Zbyszko
Paisley
Mike Tenay
Stevie Ray
Tony Schiavone
Gene Okerlund
[IN/OUT]
In
Out
Summary
No signings
[OCTOBER]
Week 1, October 2001
——
◆Talent Relations
Kevin Nash has one month remaining on his 2 year, $130,000 contract. He has indicated he does not wish to extend his contract.
◆Roster Changes:
Alex Wright has been released from his contract at a cost of $76,200 to the 2001 budget
Hugh Morrus has been released from his contract at a cost of $91,200 to the 2001 budget
Mike Sanders was released from his contract at a cost of $65,400 to the 2001 budget
Evan Karagias was released from his contract at a cost of $36,000 to the 2001 budget
[9.26 WCW NITRO!]
[Natchitoches, Louisiana]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Prather Coliseum, LA in front of 2,487
Overall Rating 64
Tensions also rise between Lance Storm and Mike Awesome
Goldberg and Sting are unhappy with each others performance in their six man tag
La Parka and Diamond Dallas Page are backstage; an argument breaks out, and they start brawling with each other.
Diamond Dallas Page, Goldberg and Sting defeated Scott Steiner and Team Canada (Lance Storm & Mike Awesome)
Gene Okerlund interviews WCW TV Champion Fit Finlay and Vampiro
Rob Van Dam & Sabu beat Legacy (Ric Flair & Dustin Rhodes) to retain the WCW Tag Team Titles (fourth defence)
Legacy (Ric Flair & Dustin Rhodes) have a backstage confrontation with Jeff Jarrett, Vilano V and Stacy Keilber
Vampiro beats Kanyon, Rick Steiner, Lex Luger and Bam Bam Bigelow in a WCW TV Title No.1 Contenders Match
La Parka beats Konnan
WCW President Eric Bischoff and Championship Committee Member Terry Funk speak with RVD and Scott Steiner
Rey Misterio Jr beats Cash
Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark) beat James Storm & Mark Jindrak
Yoshihiro Tajiri beats Damien 666 to retain the WCW Cruiserweight Title (third defence)
Jeff Jarrett beats Super Crazy
Rob Van Dam and Scott Steiner open the show, they'll meet for the World Title at Halloween Havoc
◆Show Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a rating of 0.11, with 86,629 viewers with 1,442,029 viewers overall.
Goldberg suffered a pronator trees syndrome at last nights show, he'll work through the injury for the next 1 year and 1 month.
◆Business Notes
NBCSN has agreed to terminate their partnership to broadcast events at no cost.
Viewer's Choice Canada has signed a twelve month agreement to broadcast events, 30% revenue will go to WCW.
Azteca 7 has agreed to terminate their partnership to broadcast events at no cost.
MVS Multivisionh as signed a twelve month agreement to broadcast events, 30% revenue will go to WCW.
J Sports 1 has agreed to terminate their partnership to broadcast events at no cost.
Samurai! TV as signed a twelve month agreement to broadcast events, 35% revenue will go to WCW.
◆News
Kevin Nash has signed a contract with WWF, he will depart WCW after five years at the end of October. He rejected a per show agreement from WCW for considerably reduced terms.
◆[Halloween Havoc] "CARD SO FAR!"
Rob Van Dam v Scott Steiner - WCW World Heavyweight Title
Fit Finaly v Vampiro - WCW World Television Title
Jeff Jarrett v Dustin Rhodes
Week 2, October 2001
——
[10.7 WCW NITRO!]
[Charlotte, North Carolina]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Grady Cole Center, NC in front of 2,709
Overall Rating 56
The announcers confirm Sting will face Goldberg at Halloween Havoc
Billy Gunn beat Air Paris
Rob Van Dam, Sabu, Goldberg & Rey Misterio Jr beat Fit Finlay, Jeff Jarrett, Mike Awesome and Lance Storm. Storm and Awesome struggled to get along.
Sting & Yoshihiro Tajiri beat Curt Hennig & Kanyon
Vampiro beats Rick Steiner
Scott Steiner beats Bryan Clark in a non-title match
Scott Steiner attacks Rob Van Dam
Ric Flair gets into an argument with Vilano V and his manager Don Callis
Diamond Dallas Page beat Shannon Moore
Totally Buff (Buff Bagwell & Lex Luger) beat Lash Leroux and Volador Jr
Diamond Dallas Page and La Parka get into a confrontation backstage
Jeff Jarrett and Dustin Rhodes trade insults on the microphone, ahead of their match at Halloween Havoc
Sting and Goldberg argue backstage,
EZ Money beat AJ Styles
La Parka, Ultimo Dragon and TAKA Michinoku beat Super Crazy, Yang and Kaz Hayashi
Rey Misterio Jr and Kevin Nash open the show, a match is agreed for Halloween Havoc
◆Show Notes
Kanyon suffered an abdominal muscle contusion and will be out for 3 days.
◆[Halloween Havoc] "CARD SO FAR!"
Rob Van Dam v Scott Steiner - WCW World Heavyweight Title
Sting v Goldberg
Ric Flair v Vilano V
La Parka v Diamond Dallas Page
Fit Finaly v Vampiro - WCW World Television Title
Jeff Jarrett v Dustin Rhodes
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a TV rating of 0.11 with 86,486 viewers with 1,382,843 viewers overall.
◆Roster Changes
Randy Savage has agreed a one year, per show handshake agreement with no downside.
Road Dogg has agreed a one year, per show handshake agreement with no downside.
Week 3, October 2001
——
[10.17 WCW NITRO!] "BILLY FUN HAS AN ANNOUNCEMENT"
[Daytona Beach, Florida]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Peabody Auditorium, FL in front of 2,520
Overall Rating 64
Closing the show Scott Steiner and Rob Van Dam confronted each other in the ring
New Age Outlaws (Billy Gunn & Road Dogg) beat Kevin Nash & Vampiro
DDP, Sting and Rey Misterio Jr beat Curt Hennig, Chavo Guerrero Jr and Shane Douglas
Sabu beat Mr Aquila
Diamond Dallas Page and La Parka had a confrontation backstage
WCW Control Center: Confirmed for Halloween Havoc - Kevin Nash v Rey Misterio Jr, Sting v Goldberg and Ric Flair v Vilano V
Rick Steiner beat Lash Leroux
WCW TV Champion Fit Finlay attacks Vampiro backstage
Yoshihiro Tajiri & Tommy Dreamer beat Cash & EZ Money
Totally Buff (Buff Bagwell & Lex Luger) beat Volador Jr and Brazo de Platino
Gene Okerlund interviews Jeff Jarrett and Dustin Rhodes ahead of their match at Halloween Havoc, the match is now a Bull Rope Match
Mike Awesome beat Jamie Knoble
Announcers plug the main event Kevin Nash & Vampiro v New Age Outlaws
Jeff Jarrett beat Bam Bam Bigelow
Kanyon beats Billy Kidman
Billy Gunn introduces Road Dog, the New Age Outlaws are in WCW. Kevin Nash and Vampiro appear and our main event is set.
[DARK] Lance Storm beat Kaz Hayashi
◆[Halloween Havoc] "CARD SO FAR!"
Rob Van Dam v Scott Steiner - WCW World Heavyweight Title
Kevin Nash v Rey Misterio Jr
Sting v Goldberg
Ric Flair v Vilano V
La Parka v Diamond Dallas Page
Fit Finaly v Vampiro - WCW World Television Title
Jeff Jarrett v Dustin Rhodes - Bull Rope Match
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a TV audience of 0.11 with 87,069 viewers with 1,458,166 viewers overall
Week 4, October 2001
——
[10.17 Halloween Havoc!] "BILLY FUN HAS AN ANNOUNCEMENT"
[Auburn, Alabama]
◆”Halloween Havoc" Pay Per View
Autozone Park, TN in front of 12,497
Overall Rating 70
After the show Randy Savage hit the ring and went toe to toe with Rob Van Dam
Rob Van Dam beat Scott Steiner to retain the WCW World Heavyweight Title (first defence)
Goldberg beat Sting
Goldberg leaves the locker room and heads to the ring
Rey Misterio Jr beat Kevin Nash
Scott Steiner spoke to WCW President Eric Bischoff ahead of the World Title match
Dustin Rhodes beat Jeff Jarrett in a bull rope match
WCW President Eric Bischoff meet with a disgruntled Lance Storm and Mike Awesome
Kevin Nash is seen getting ready backstage
Diamond Dallas Page beat La Parka
New Age Outlaws beat Team Canada (Mike Awesome & Lance Storm)
Diamond Dallas Page and La Parka got into it backstage
Vampiro beat Fit Finlay for the WCW World Television Title
Gene Oklerund interviews Jeff Jarrett and Dustin Rhodes ahead of their Bullrope match
Ric Flair beat Vilano V
Jamie Knoble, Sabu, Tommy Dreamer beat Chavo Guerrero Jr, Mr Aquilar and TAKA Michinoku
Yohihiro Taijir beats Ultimo Dragon to retain the WCW Cruiserweight Title (fourth defence)
The announcers preview our three main matches, Rey Misterio Jr v Kevin Nash, Goldberg v Sting and Scott Steiner v Rob Van Dam for the WCW World Title
◆Show Notes
Stevie Ray was fined for poor backstage behaviour
◆Business Notes
Halloween Havoc was shown on international TV and was rated 0.56 with 420,226 viewers with 614,274 viewers overall
Halloween Havoc received a pay per view buy rate of 0.35 (179,541 buys)
[19.18 WCW NITRO!] "MACHO MAN RETURNS"
[Daytona Beach, Florida]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Harborside Events Center, FL in front of 2,715
Overall Rating 71
Rob Van Dam and Randy Savage closed the show in the ring
Randy Savage beat Diamond Dallas Page and Rey Misteiro Jr to become the new No.1 contender
Sting beat Kanyon
Jeff Jarrett beat Kevin Nash
Vampiro and Vilano V /Stacey Keilber had a confrontation backstage
Mike Awesome and Lance Storm fought in the ring post match, turning Storm babyface
Ric Flair & Goldberg beat Mike Awesome and Lance Storm
Rob Van Dam and Sabu beat Totally Buff (Buff Bagwell & Lex Luger) to retain the WCW Tag Titles (fifth defence)
Shane Douglas beat Konnan
In ring segment with Goldberg and Sting, this feud isn't over yet
Vampiro beat La Parka to retain the WCW World TV title (first defence)
Fit Finlay beat Brazo de Platino
Ric Flair cuts a promo, he challenges Ultimo Dragon to match in the near future
◆Show Notes
WCW Nitro was broadcast to a rating of 0.12 with 96,977 viewers with 1,581,063 viewers overall.
[NOVEMBER]
Week 1, November 2001
//END OF MONTH REPORT
◆Company Info
Size Medium ⬆️, second in the world
Next Event World War 3 (pay per view)
TV Shows: WCW Nitro (Monday)
◆Financial Summary
Revenue 2.1m ⬆️ 300k
Wages ($2.6m) ⬆️ $300k
Of Which Are Terminations (268k) ⬆️ $268k
Loss $2.9m) ⬆️ $300k
Performance ($894k) ⬇️39k
Reserves $2.9m
◆Roster
[FACE]
Singles
Bam Bam Bigelow
Billy Kidman w/Tygress
Booker T
Brazo de Platino
Diamond Dallas Page
Goldberg
Great Sasuke
James Mitchell
Jamie Knoble
Konnan w/Tygress
Lance Storm w/Rena Mero
Lash Leroux
Lizmark Jr
Norman Smiley
Rey Misterio Jr w/Tygress
Rob Van Dam - WCW World Heavyweight Champion, WCW World Tag Team Champion
Sabu w/Bill Alfonso - WCW World Tag Team Champion
Shane Helms -
Silver King
Sting
Super Crazy
Tommy Dreamer
Vampiro - WCW World Television Champion
Volador Jr
Yoshiro Tajiri - WCW Cruiserweight Champion
Tag Teams
Air Raid (AJ Styles & Air Paris)
Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark)
Legacy (Dustin Rhodes & Ric Flair)
Jung Dragons (Yang & Kaz Hayashi)
[HEEL]
Singles
Buff Bagwell
Cash
Chavo Guerrero Jr
Christopher Daniels
Curt Hennig
Damien 666 w/Don Callis
Elix Skipper
EZ Money
Fit Finlay
James Storm
Kanyon w/Bobby Henan
Kid Romeo
La Parka
Lex Luger
Mark Jindrak
Mike Awesome
Rick Steiner
Randy Savage
Scott Steiner w/Midajah - WCW United States Heavyweight Champion
Shane Douglas
Shannon Moore
Ultimo Dragon
Vilano V w/Stacy Keibler
◆Unavailable
Sid Vicious - Leg Break 6 Months, 2 weeks
Booker T - Frontal Bone Fracture - 10 months, 2 weeks
Norman Smiley - Intracerebral Hematoma - 1 year, 3 months, 1 week
Stevie Ray - At home
◆Personalities
Arn Anderson - Member of the Championship Committee
Eric Bischoff - OwnePresident
Dusty Rhodes - Director Talent Acquisition
Roddy Piper - Member of the Championship Committee
Ricky Steamboat - Member of the Championship Committee
Terry Funk - Member of the Championship Committee / Part Time Wrestler
Larry Zbyszko
Paisley
Mike Tenay
Tony Schiavone
Gene Okerlund
[IN/OUT]
In
Randy Savage
Road Dogg
Out
Alex Wright
Hugh Morrus
Mike Sanders
Evan Karagias
Kevin Nash
TAKA Michinoku
Summary
Two signings and six departures
[1.11 WCW NITRO!] "SAVAGE MAKES IN RING RETURN"
[Las Vegas, Nevada]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Las Vegas Hotel & Casino, NV in front of 2,418
Overall Rating 72
Savage and Rob Van Dam went at it after the match.
Randy Savage & Fit Finlay beat Rob Van Dam & Sabu in a non-title match
Randy Savage was getting ready backstage
Rey Misterio Jr beat Rick Steiner
Gene Okerlund was joined by former tag partners Lance Storm & Rena Mero and Mike Awesome
New Age Outlaws beat Kronik
Ric Flair cut a promo on Ultimo Dragon
Legacy (Dusting Rhodes & Ric Flair)
Jeff Jarrett and Dustin Rhodes face off backstage, they'll do battle next in tag action
Lance Storm beats Kaz Hayashi
Goldberg beats Chavo Guerrero Jr
Scott Steiner beats Silver King
Sting beats Lex Luger
Goldberg and Sting cut in ring promos at each other
Announcers reveal Rob Van Dam & Sabu will face Randy Savage & Fit Finlay in a non-title match in the main event
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a TV rating of 0.12 with 97,088 viewers with 1,586,785 viewers overall.
◆Roster Changes
Jinsei Shinzaki has a greed a five appearance handshake deal with no downside
Barry Windham has agreed a one month, per appearance handshake deal with no downside
Mr Aquila has left WCW following the conclusion of his contract.
Chris Candido has agreed a five appearance/3 month handshake agreement with no downside
NOSAWA has agreed a one month handshake agreement with no downside
Jake Roberts has agreed a one month handshake agreement with no downside
Sandman has agreed a one month per show agreement with no downside
Shinya Hashimoto has agreed a one month, per show, handshake agreement with no downside.
Week 2, November 2001
——
[11.7 WCW NITRO!] "SAVAGE MAKES IN RING RETURN"
[Tampa, Florida]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Bob Martinez Sports Center, FL in front of 3,050
Overall Rating 70
Dustin Rhodes, Ric Flair, Rob Van Dam & Sabu beat Curt Hennig, Randy Savage, Jeff Jarrett and Ulmto Dragon
Lance Storm bear Buff Bagwell
New Age Outlaws beeat Jung Dragons, Billy Kidman & Konnan and Air Raid
From the Control Center we preview Lance Storm v Mike Awesome, Jeff Jarrett v Dustin Rhodes and Rey Misteiro Jr v Scott Steiner at World War 3
Diamond Dallas Page beats Chris Candido
Ric Flair cuts a promo on Ultimo Dragon
Goldberg beats Christopher Daniels
Randy Savage and Rob Van Dam have an in-ring confrontation.
A video plays hyping up the New Age Outlaws
Sting beat Super Crazy
Vilano V beat Jamie Knoble
Steiner Brothers beat Silver King & Volador Jr
Director of Talent Acquisition Dusty Rhodes sits down with Sid Vicious to provide an injury update he'll be back in 6 months following his devastating leg break
Scott Steiner attacks Rey Misterio Jr after the match
Rey Misterio Jr beat Damien 666
Sting and Goldberg are joined in the ring by Championship Committee members Terry Funk and Arn Anderson, told if they win World War 3, they'll become No.1 Contenders at Starcade
◆Roster Changes
Vilano III has agreed a six month handshake agreement, per show fee with no downside.
El Pantera has agreed a one month, per appearance, no downside handshake agreement
Shinjiro Otani has agreed a one month, per show handshake agreement with no downside
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown last night to a 0.12 TV rating with 96,490 viewers with 1,590,844 views overall.
WCW Worldwide will return, taping Wednesday's and being shown on Sunday mornings.
Week 3, November 2001
——
[11.14 WCW NITRO!] "SAVAGE MAKES IN RING RETURN"
[Chicago, Illinois]
◆”WCW Niro” TV Show
Congress Theatre, IL in front of2,333
Overall Rating 71
Goldberg, Dustin Rhodes & Ric Flair beat Jeff Jarrett, Kanyon and Randy Savage
Rey Misterio Jr bat Fit Finlay, La Parka and Diamond Dallas Page
Sting beat Curt Hennig
The announcers plugged Rob Van Dam v Randy Savage for the World Title at World War 3
Lance Storm and Rena Mero confronted Mike Awesome backstage
Goldberg and Sting argued backstage
Rob Van Dam beat Damien 666
Scott Steiner cut a backstage promo on Rey Misterio Jr
A video recapped the Sting v Goldberg feud
Mike Awesome & The Steiner Brothers beat Bam Bam Bigelow and Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark)
Sabu beat Shannon Moore
Scott Steiner and Rey Misterio cut promos on each other in the ring
Chavo Guerrero Jr & Mark Jindrak beat Kaz Hayashi & Yang
Ultimo Dragon and Jeff Jarrett confront Ric Flair and Dustin Rhodes backstage
A video played hyping Rob Van Dam v Randy Savage for the World Title at World War 3
Shane Douglas beat Shane Helms
◆Show Notes
Kaz Hayashi broke his wrist in his match
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown with a TV rating of 0.12 with 96,901 viewers with 1,625,803 viewers overall
◆"World War 3!" [CARD]
Rob Van Dam v Randy Savage - World Heavyweight Title
World War 3 - 60 Man, 3 Ring, Battle Royal
Jeff Jarrett v Dustin Rhodes
Ric Flair v Ultimo Dragon
Scott Steiner v Rey Misterio Jr
Goldberg v Sting
Lance Storm v Mike Awesome
[11.19 WCW WORLD WAR 3] "60 Warriors, 3 Rings, 1 Survivor. You Do The Math"
[Raleigh, North Carolina]
◆”WCW World War 3” Pay per View
PNC Arena, NC in front of 17,017
Overall Rating 77
Rob Van Dam beat Randy Savage to retain the WCW World Heavyweight Title (second defence)
Randy Savage makes an elaborate entrance ahead of the main event
Goldberg attacked Sting backstage
Rey Misterio Jr won World War 3. The final four were Goldberg, Sting and Scott Steiner
Goldberg and Sting go to a double count out
Jake Roberts appears backstage, he'll be in the World War 3 match
Ric Flair beat Ultimo Dragon
Scott Steiner is with Eric Bischoff, he draws which number ring he'll be in for the World War 3 match
A video is shown hyping up Randy Savage
Jeff Jarrett beat Dustin Rhodes
Goldberg is getting ready backstage
Ric Flair cut a promo on Ultimo Dragon
Scott Steiner beat Rey Misterio Jr
Mike Awesome beat Lance Storm
Scott Steiner cuts a promo on Rey Misterio Jr
New Age Outlaws beat Great Sasuke & Super Crazy
Announcers preview Ric Flair v Ultimo Dragon & Goldberg v Sting and Randy Savage v Rob Van Dam
◆Business Notes
WCW World War 3 was shown on pay per view with a buy rate of 0.37 with 189,403 buys.
WCW World War 3 was shown on international TV with a rating of 0.62 with 466,414 viewers and 670,230 viewers overall
Week 4, November 2001
——
◆News
WCW Worldwide returns! Taping monthly the 1 hour show is set to debut on ESPN2 in the US, ESPN Classic Canada (Canada), JP Sport 1 (Japan) and E4 (UK). Worldwide originally aired from October 8, 1975, to March 31, 2001. At the time of its cancellation, WorldWide was the longest-running, uninterrupted weekly syndicated show of any kind on the air in the United States.
[11.25 WCW NITRO]
[Bessemer, Alabama]
◆”WCW Nitro!” TV Show
Jackson County Fairgrounds, AL in front of 3,307
Overall Rating 69
Sting beat Randy Savage
Steiner Brothers beat Kronik
WCW Control Center confirmed for Starcade: Ric Flair v Rob Van Dam, Jeff Jarrett v Dustin Rhodes in a cage, Rey Misterio Jr v Scott Steiner
Goldberg beat Chavo Gurrero Jr
Goldberg and Sting then had an in-ring confrontation
Rob Van Dam and Scott Steiner bumped into each other backstage
La Parka beat Billy Kidman
Ric Flair signed the contract for Starcade with WCW President Eric Bischoff
Fit Finlay, New Age Outlaws went to a no contest with Rey Misterio, Ric Flair and Dustin Rhodes after Jeff Jarrett got involved
DDP was backstage following his victory early in the evening
Lance Storm beat Vilano III
Mike Awesome beat Jamie Knoble
Sting cut a promo on Goldberg
Diamond Dallas Page, Vampiro, Yoshihiro Tajiri beat EZ Money, Shannon Moore and Cash
Ric Flair cut a promo on Rob Van Dam who he will challenge for the WCW World Title at Starcade
Announcers plugged the main event Sting v Randy Savage
◆Show Notes
Bam Bam Bigelow was fined for poor backstage behaviour
◆Business Notes
WCW Nitro was shown last night with a 0.12 TV rating with 93,497 viewers with 1,538,201 viewers overall.
[11.27 WCW WORLDWIDE TAPINGS]
[Roanoke Rapids, North Carolina]
◆”WCW Worldwide!” TV Taping 1
Royal Palace Theater, NC in front of 928
Overall Rating 51
Vampiro beat Kanyon to retain the WCW World Television Title (second defence)
A video recapped the Goldberg v Sting feud
Lash Leroux beat James Storm
Scott Steiner cut a promo on Rey Misterio Jr
EZ Money beat Bobby Eaton
Tommy Dreamer & Yoshihiro Tajiri challenged New Age Outlaws to a match at Starcade
Tommy Dreamer & Yoshihiro Tajiri beat Elix Skipper & Kid Romeo
Jamie Knoble beat Jimmy Valiant
Ric Flair and Rob Van Dam cut promos on each other
◆”WCW Worldwide!” TV Taping 2
Royal Palace Theater, NC in front of 928
Overall Rating 48
Ric Steiner beat Konnan
A video recaps the Rob Van Dam v Ric Flair feud
Lizmark Jr, Volador Jr and Super Crazy beat Chavo Guerrero Jr, Damien 666 and Vilano V
Jeff Jarrett cuts a promo on Dustin Rhodes
Silver King beat Shannon Moore
Air Raid (Air Paris & AJ Styles) beat The Barbarian & KC Thunder
Rey Misterio Jr cuts a promo on Scott Steiner ahead of their match at Starcade
Mark Jinfrak beat CW Anderson
Announcers plug Konnan v Ric Steiner in the main event
◆”WCW Worldwide!” TV Taping 3
Royal Palace Theater, NC in front of 928
Overall Rating 53
Curt Hennig beat Bam Bam Bigelow
Rena Mero and Lance Storm cut a promo on Mike Awesome
Mike Awesome beat BRazo de Platino
Dustin Rhodes cut a promo on Jeff Jarrett
Great Sasuke beat El Pantera
Ric Flair cut a promo on Rob Van Dam
Kronik beat Jimmy Valiant & KC Thunder
Buff Bagwell beat Romeo Valentino
◆”WCW Worldwide!” TV Taping 4
Royal Palace Theater, NC in front of 928
Overall Rating 51
Lex Luger beat Billy Kidman
New Age Outlaws beat Bobby Eaton & CW Anderson
Sting cut a promo on Goldberg
Sabu beat Christopher Daniels
WCW World Champion Rob Van Dam cut a promo on Ric Flair
Fit Finlay and DDP fought backstage
A video recapped Rey Misterio Jr v Scott Steiner feud
Shane Helms beat Chris Candido
Yang beat JR Ryder
◆Taping Notes
Bobby Orton, Jimmy Valiant, The Barbarian, KC Thunder, CW Anderson, JR Ryder and Romeo Valentino agreed one night deals to work the taping
Lex Luger sustained a Superocondylar Fracture, following survey he will be out for 11 days
◆Business Notes
WCW Worldwide was shown with 0.7 TV rating 54,475 viewers with 119,150 viewers overall
[DECEMBER]
Week 1, November 2001
//END OF MONTH REPORT
◆Company Info
Size Medium ⬆️, second in the world
Next Event Starcade (pay per view)
TV Shows: WCW Nitro (Monday)
◆Financial Summary
Revenue 2.1m ⬆️ 300k
Wages ($2.4m) ⬇️ $200k
Of Which Are Terminations (0k) ⬇️ $268k
Loss $2.8m) ⬇️ $100k
Performance ($534k) ⬇️360k
Reserves $2.3m
◆Roster
[FACE]
Singles
Bam Bam Bigelow
Barry Windham
Billy Kidman w/Tygress
Booker T
Brazo de Platino
Diamond Dallas Page
Goldberg
Great Sasuke
James Mitchell
Jamie Knoble
Konnan w/Tygress
Lance Storm w/Rena Mero
Lash Leroux
Lizmark Jr
Norman Smiley
Rey Misterio Jr w/Tygress
Rob Van Dam - WCW World Heavyweight Champion, WCW World Tag Team Champion
Sabu w/Bill Alfonso - WCW World Tag Team Champion
Shane Helms
Shinjiro Otani
Silver King
Sting
Super Crazy
Tommy Dreamer
Vampiro - WCW World Television Champion
Volador Jr
Yoshiro Tajiri - WCW Cruiserweight Champion
Tag Teams
Air Raid (AJ Styles & Air Paris)
Kronik (Brian Adams & Bryan Clark)
Legacy (Dustin Rhodes & Ric Flair)
Jung Dragons (Yang & Kaz Hayashi)
[HEEL]
Singles
Buff Bagwell
Cash
Chavo Guerrero Jr
Christopher Daniels
Chris Candido
Curt Hennig
Damien 666 w/Don Callis
El Pantera
Elix Skipper
EZ Money
Fit Finlay
Jinsei Shinzaki
James Storm
Jake Roberts
Kanyon w/Bobby Henan
Kid Romeo
La Parka
Lex Luger
Mark Jindrak
Mike Awesome
NOSAWA
Rick Steiner
Randy Savage
Sandman
Scott Steiner w/Midajah - WCW United States Heavyweight Champion
Shane Douglas
Shannon Moore
Shinya Hashimoto
Ultimo Dragon
Vilano III
Vilano V w/Stacy Keibler
◆Unavailable
Sid Vicious - Leg Break 5 Months, 2 weeks
Booker T - Frontal Bone Fracture - 11 Months
Norman Smiley - Intracerebral Hematoma - 1 year, 2 months, 1 week
Stevie Ray - At home
Kaz Hayashi - Broken Wrist - 9 days
Lex Luger - Supracondylar Fracture - 13 days
NOSAWA 0 Lateral Collateral Ligament - 25 days
◆Personalities
Arn Anderson - Member of the Championship Committee
Eric Bischoff - OwnePresident
Dusty Rhodes - Director Talent Acquisition
Roddy Piper - Member of the Championship Committee
Ricky Steamboat - Member of the Championship Committee
Terry Funk - Member of the Championship Committee / Part Time Wrestler
Larry Zbyszko
Paisley
Mike Tenay
Tony Schiavone
Gene Okerlund
[IN/OUT]
In
Jinsei Shinzaki
Barry Windham
Chris Candido
NOSAWA
Jake Roberts
Sandman
Shinya Hashimoto
Vilano III
El Pantera
Shinjiro Otani
Out
Mr Aquila
Summary
10 signings and one departure

Sorry copied and pasted my reply to someone else's post: That describes my sister. And that's why I can't help but hate her guts. She's so bloody fake. One of the most two- faced people I've ever met. My mum's little flying monkey.
And she really reminds me of a high school bully! Like two peas in a pod. Both incredibly snobbish, stuck up and judgemental. Insecure, vindictive. Envious. Hypocritical. Always trying to stir up drama in the family. Kind to my face, talking crap about me with my mum, calling me insults and saying stuff about me that isn't true. Massive gossip. Gets bullied by her husband too apparently because she enjoys being a doormat and then takes out her insecurity on other people. Ie, namely me. Or her husband just can't stand her because she's a conniving, selfish, manipulative, two-faced bitch.
I think I discovered she was probably one of the people cyber bullying me at some point! So then, being petty, I created a troll account and trolled her in revenge.
She kind of gets her just desserts in a way, however, because my mum and other sister pretty much rip her to shreds when she's not around. Karma is fair, huh? Or maybe that's partly why she is that way. A bitter, contemptuous brat who takes all her anger from that out on me.
No joke. Once I prayed for her to quit always being a bitch to me, to change and be remorseful and then something bad happened to her.
I just want to keep out my family's way, have nothing to do with them, but they make it so hard. Always bringing me back in their stupid, pointless drama.
I even confronted her about this recently and she just denied everything, like she always does, like she used to do when she was always stealing from me. She would probably still try if I didn't lock my stuff away. And I suspect she may have started stealing from me again recently.
And then she has the nerve to call me paranoid and say stuff like that the family is concerned about me. Just proving my point that they talk about me behind my back. And she has regularly talked badly about me. As though cults don't exist and it's all in my head and she isn't a two- faced bitch and a bully who has always been controlling towards me, competitive with me and vindictive towards me.
She will do the most toxic and vile things towards me and then gaslight me as she denies it and plays the victim, pretending that she didn't do anything wrong and that everyone else is to blame.
She will also treat people like crap, walk over us, and then not speak to them/ us for weeks later and hold a massive grudge if we dare pull her up on it.
My family are honestly lucky I haven't killed them in their sleep at this point. It would really probably be the least they deserve. After all, it's not like I can just leave when I have nowhere else to go.
Family by blood and name but not by actions. Not in the ways that really matter.
If I'm contemptuous towards any of my family it's only because they made this way. They literally provoke it in me. There I am trying to live my life in peace and stay away from them, and there they are trying to make me their puppet, to do as they say, smile and look happy whilst being abused by them.
I don't want to be contemptuous but she's frankly horrible and disgusting towards me so it's like how do you like people like that? People who seem determined to hate you and make you their scapegoat while you see through all their bs?
She's now thinking she's got ADHD or something but it's clear to me she's probably just got a serious personality disorder due to unhealed childhood trauma and being triangulated by our mother her whole life.
I don't know how many narcissist traits I may have but I can see that I'm more self-aware than my siblings and that I'm constantly victimised by them.
It's incredible that they will still defend my mum and claim I'm horrible for speaking the truth and talking about her behaviour as it really is.
They actually gaslight me, call me paranoid and insist that I have a mental illness, as though completely denying all the abuse she's put me through. And when, if I did have a mental illness, it would probably mostly be from having been bullied by my siblings and my mum all my life. And even when I've walked in on them talking negatively about me countless times. And yet they deny all of that.
In their eyes our mother is apparently an angel and I'm the bad, ungrateful one who is exaggerating and being unfair and horrible to point out all the ways in which she's an abuser.
I actually expected her to say something snarky when I called our mum a toxic abuser just recently but instead she tried that whole "I'm lovely and sweet and so is mum and you're just crazy and paranoid (because situations are always so black and white, huh)" approach, as though she really believes that herself or is simply trying to convince herself. Being in denial so she doesn't have to admit any wrongdoing and the fact she's horrifically two-faced. Or because it would mean admitting that she's just like our evil mother.
She also said that what I had said was so hurtful (aw the little pathetic narcissist can't stand being called out for her constant crap) that she would never tell our mum about it but, knowing her, she probably has because she doesn't seem to give a shit about people's feelings, otherwise she wouldn't treat me the way she has.
I hate her guts and I want nothing to do with her. But she still comes round here regularly to bitch about me with our mum and I can't afford to get away, not least because I can't work long hours due to disability.
No wonder the cashier stared daggers at my mum. She could probably tell she was an abuser and saw my body language said I wanted nothing to do with her and I was trying to get away.
Also I don't know how or why she does it (probably to piss me off) but I keep noticing random stuff going missing, often my brand new favourite things and then seeing my sister turning up wearing them.
I think my mum is deliberately sneakily giving my stuff to her sometimes, claiming I don't need it because I have a lot and then gaslighting me by denying it afterwards and saying I'm delusional and crazy.
(My sister has always been envious of my clothes and used to steal openly from me with no shame and then laugh at me when I called her out on it).
Because for a while now I haven't been able to find my new favourite black shorts and I saw her wearing what looked like them yesterday. A pair of shorts I've never seen her wear before. And they looked very very like, exactly like mine that have gone missing. I even checked the brand and it sounded like the same brand.
These are some of my favourite and few pairs of sports shorts I own and I really need them and I was wearing them regularly before she stole them.
I keep some of my clothing in the attic and I'm worried that she's going to go for that stuff next.
Anything that I don't lock away seems to eventually disappear and I'm pretty sure she's behind it.
It really used to mess with my mind when I was sure I'd notice clothing disappear from my drawers and then odd items reappear later, and sometimes only when I had called her out for it. As though she only gave it back so I didn't break her neck or something (And tbh at this point I'm getting pretty close to doing exactly that).
And now any nice clothing that I don't have time or space to put in a padlocked wardrobe or my padlock bags, seems to disappear.
I knew I wasn't being OTT or paranoid to lock it away.
I don't even know how/ when she takes stuff because I'm around a lot. So I'm wondering if sometimes she sneaks in when I'm sleeping and takes it or my mum, who pretends to be on my side but secretly seems to greatly enjoy triangulating us against eachother as she has done all our lives (minus doing it to the beloved golden child who is always top queen and who my mum won't intentionally hurt) is actually the way sometimes taking stuff and giving it to her. And then only going back to retrieve it once I've already complained.
Now I can't even find my new jeans. Some even that she bought me for my birthday! Now why would she take that stuff? Is this some kind of vindictive resentment stuff because that's what it's sure looking like at this point.
I think she stalks me and sees me ranting about how much I hate them, calling them snakes and all, and so then they do this toxic, twisted stuff in an attempt to get back at me. Because they're disgusting and evil.
My golden child sibling who ironically bullies this same sibling whose side she seems to love taking against mine, is also an abusive control freak like my mum.
Just recently she came over to me and started asking what I'm doing to control me. Saying "you are doing work, right?" And she had apparently noticed my initial frostiness towards her when I ignored her when she said hi to me.
So she literally came in the room where I was minding my own business and stared saying hi over and over until I said it back. I was tempted to say "What do you want, you manipulative, annoying, two faced bitch?" But I said hi and you can see how it was basically forced from me! I didn't want to say hi. Frankly I wanted to hit her in the face.
She's one of those people who strangers like because they don't know what a fake snob she is and how she treats her own family, following in the path of generational trauma to control her own kids like our mum did to us. Evil, cowardly bitch.
She's always talking crap about other people. I hate how fake she is, thinking she's some do- gooder when she's certainly not. She's just too dim or ignorant to realise how much she's been brainwashed by our mother. It used to be the black sheep of her husband's family, who was probably treated like I am by them and had issues because of that. But of course narcissists always blame the victm, their scapegoat for all their issues.
I had considered I was being paranoid but this time but it's looking more and more like the old snake of stealing has reared its ugly head again. . A favourite dress of mine that I wear regularly has gone missing. I've checked both of my wardrobes and my drawers and it's not there. I think I remember where I put it and she or my mum must have taken it directly out of my wardrobe because she probably told my mum that she liked it and my evil mother wanted to upset me deliberately and create drama and so probably gave it to her.
The main reason I don't lend her stuff is because she steals it. And also of course because she's horrible to me and I hate her (i never had any issue with lending to the sister i liked who wasn't a covert narcissist). She doesn't take it to give it back and doing so is also a huge inconvenience when the other person already lives in another house. Trying to get it back. In fact I'm actually thinking of matching over there today to search all her wardrobes.
The number of times my mum (who I now realise probably gave her my things in the first place, making my sister feeling more justified in taking it) has gone over there to find my missing stuff in her wardrobe. And sometimes she couldn't find it but I think my sister still has the items because I've seen the audacious bitch come around here wearing it. Like she probably has gotten more crafty and purposely hides it for whenever my mum searches over there.
Idk if I also have npd but then I have Asperger's so the two can often look the same, but I do know my feelings are valid and I'm pretty sure that no one deserves to be treated this way.
Plus, even if I'm a narcissist, I'm the kind who keeps to myself. Perhaps a little attention-seeking but I never purposely bother others.
And tbh maybe I'm this way because my family have scapegoated me all life so how could I have turned out any other way?
I know the cult stuff seems to be real so it doesn't seem like I'm wrong about all of this stuff either and my own problems, my dad's paedophilia, my mum and my siblings ' narcissism was probably all socially engineered by these evil people. Those evil, evil twits. It may be partly genetic but made worse by them and their influence, no doubt.
Sure, maybe like Sheldon Cooper, who I relate to in some ways, I'm a difficult person. I can't deal with change. I may be deeply damaged. I might be internally a bit misogynistic. But then it's no wonder being raised in a matriarchal family like mine, is it? When the women are perhaps the worst or among the worst people in the family. Just in different ways to my dad, who is a violent control freak obsessed with controlling everyone else but also probably a paedophile.
Maybe this is how I am or maybe it's mostly caused by the way I've been raised.
Or perhaps to you this sounds like a long schizophrenic rant, even though I'm pretty positive it's not. Because I never imagined my sister stealing from me in the past. And I'm pretty positive I'm not imagining all the cyberstalkking and cyber bullying, in person bullying and harassment, either. The weird, creepy, horrible, disturbing messages left for me in graffiti. Oh so many shades of Eyes Wide Shut.
Maybe it's not normal to get this upset about siblings stealing from you or maybe it is. I'd say it's justified anger whether I'm a narcissist or not. For I still have feelings, concerns, a beating heart like everyone else. Sadly I'm just a lot more damaged then most people are. And my family doing this to me is simply reinforcing or adding to the extensive damage they've already done to me.
And it's not just the stealing itself, it's what it represents. The lack of respect, the audacity to then lie about it and gaslight me. It's basically bullying and it's exactly the sort of thing bullies used to do to me in primary school. They would steal my pens, hide them from me until eventually I basically snapped, screamed at them and told the teacher.
I know that most people would probably feel this annoyed about it (see even now I'm feeling guilty like I have to justify normal reactions to being disrespected or something). I'm thinking it's almost like my sister may be under mind control with how obnoxious she acts sometimes. Especially if it keeps happening even when you tell them not to.
Perhaps most people wouldn't feel homicidal and on the verge of a nervous breakdown. As I'm feeling now. I do regularly feel things more strongly than others, I don't deny it. But is that such a bad things? Counterintuitively it proves I'm human. It's a normal, justified human emotion.
It's the bullying that makes me want to leave and never come back.
It's the way my golden child sibling smiled evilly (she had her back to me and probably couldn't tell I saw it) when I asked my mum to ask my sister where she had bought her shorts from because I have a very similar pair or identical pair that's gone missing. And my mum tried to gaslight me by, first of all insisting they were navy when I'm pretty positive they were black, and she insisted my sister had worn these shorts last year (not that I ever saw) and they didn't look anything like mine (she probably doesn't remember what mine even looked like) and then basically contradicting herself when she said that perhaps she'd bought them from the same place as me. Unbelievable!
I've heard my mum do this before, knowing her she probably did tell my sister they're mine but I could take them. Or my sister snuck up to my room and stole mine when she was changing out of her jeans. She has a habit of not coming prepared and then doing annoying stuff like grabbing other people's clothes even out of the washing basket of freshly cleaned clothes.
I really don't find it funny and I don't understand how my other sister could be such a bitch to smile at my hurt over this. That's literally what evil is. Schadenfreude. Delighting in another person's suffering. And even worse if you're one of the people actually causing it.
I could have sworn I even heard my mum asking her where she got the shorts from in the garden and then my sister replying that they didn't have her size. Implying she felt entitled to steal a pair of mine because she couldn't find her size in the shop. My brand new favourite pair.
Whether in any shape or form I'm ever delusional, I don't think I imagined this conversation. I have good hearing after all. And I also heard something about a green dress, and that's the dress of mine that's gone missing!
So my mum basically knows and is also lying to me, pretending I'm delusional?
Is she a sadist or something? Do you think she actually gets off on my pain? Enjoys triangulating us against us in this way instead of doing the mature adult thing, apologising to my sister for the emotional damage she did to her that makes her feel the need to treat me like this, and then telling her to fuck off and buy her own clothes and stay about 100 yards away from my room and my wardrobes at all times?!
Last night I was so angry about all this- my dad was being horrible and violent too as he often is, banging things around and threatening to harm us both because I was sitting with my dog, apparently stopping her from getting to sleep- fyi my dog went and curled up on her basket anyway and was happy to say goodnight to me- that i actually briefly considered killing them both in their sleep. And then, ideally, moving onto my siblings houses next.
I know this is evil and wrong, no matter how horrible my family have been to me, but it's just a fantasy and I was feeling so trapped and upset, especially by living with my horrible dad, that I felt desperate. Especially if that git really is working for the Illuminati and that may be the real reason he's such an obnoxious, uptight ass all the time.
It wasn't an idea of wilful evil, it was much more like "how do I escape all this? What are the options left to me at this point?" Because it often feels like it's either me or them. I'm even considering self harming, something I'd have never dreamed of doing in the past.
You think it's just my family's bullying? Well that's bad enough. My sister especially, apparently not thinking I deserve anything nice in my life that she shouldn't be able to take from me like we're some weird lesbian bosom sisters or something ( I actually find her behaviour pretty creepy and borderline incestuous lesbian if I'm being completely honest here. What normal person likes sharing another person's sweat from their worn clothes, soaking in their body aromas?) . But it's the whole cult. It's everything.
And even if I were schizophrenic, clearly I'm not imagining everything and it does seem like my siblings are massively gaslighting me.
And schizophrenics are often partly the result of being raised in families like mine. Not always. Every situation is different, of course.
And because of their abuse I start imagining things that really aren't real.
So after my mum and sister left the house yesterday, I had trouble focusing on work applications because I kept hearing their voices having a loud conversation. Like they were in the next room. And they were talking about me.
I mean who knows if I'm psychic and I was hearing things they've said about me when I wasn't around. Except I couldn't really make out specific words, it was more like an endless chatter.
It got so bad for me that I had to go and check every room in the house, including the bathrooms, even outside in the shed, to check that they weren't there. I rang my mum's phone and it turned out she had left it behind, which only seemed to reinforce my delusion. Her car was here too. Well it turned out she had only popped over to the neighbour's house as she often does.
Perhaps my golden child sibling was smiling because she thought I sounded paranoid but I'm not sure, the smile seemed oddly smug and perhaps she found out that I called her a snake online ( I guess she is too stupid to realise that her smiling about this would be only be proving my point because golden child narcs apparently never feel they're in the wrong and I've seen this before in her very unusual responses to certain situations).
I'm literally thinking about cutting myself, something I have never done before. I had a fantasy about stabbing myself earlier and just seeing if I would die from it, or if the Illuminati have really already killed me and now I'm just a clone.
I wish knowing this my siblings would stop with all their bs but I know from past experience it's not enough. I've told my sister plenty of times how much her behaviour pisses me off and she doesn't care. And she even tries to turn it back around on me and imply that I'm the one who doesn't care about her feelings. I guess because of her covert narcissism she has diminished empathy. Maybe I do too and that's why I fantasise about killing my whole family.
If I killed myself, they would probably still blame it all on me and talk to strangers about how troubled I was, how it had nothing to do with them and how they are all perfect angels.
Fuck them. Fuck the Illuminati. Fuck the devil If I kill myself or cut myself it's because I feel trapped and see no other way out.
When I stop and think calmly, I think "Ok, it's just very obnoxious and annoying what they're doing. And is it really worth dying over this?"
But then another voice says "No, it's not dramatic and irrational how you're feeling at all. You've been deeply hurt and it appears you're being bullied at home and everywhere you go and not imagining most or some of it at the very least. Your feelings are valid. Your pain is valid. And they were some really comfy and cute shorts and a lovely dress you had sworn you would destroy your sister over if she ever stole them.
This isn't just about the clothes, remember, it's everything! It's the accumulative effects of narc abuse and your own fractured personality resulting from it that can't handle change and struggles in day to day life.
It's knowing that no matter what you do, you can't completely stop it and change how people act and that killing them also wouldn't solve anything.
It's knowing that this goes beyond your family. These people are too powerful. Or else you've become mentally ill from your family abusing you.
It's the stress of what you're already dealing with, on top of the stealing."
And yeah, so I'm feeling at my wit's end.
I'm pretty sure I've searched everywhere the missing items would be.
I'm thinking I might go over there, barge in, and ransack her whole house until I find everything.
And, if that doesn't work and I don't find my things, I might cut myself and hope I catch an infection and die from it.
I'm thinking even if my sister is having marriage troubles that may or may not be affecting her kid's behaviour at school, and she is hiding this from the rest of the family, this gives her no right to take this out on me and ruin my life because of it."
That's not fair. And I'm already doing through so much already and on the verge of a severe mental breakdown because of it.
Update: I should probably add that if I seem like a hoarder with severe emotional issues, I think it's pretty apparent why. Or else it's because of my Asperger's.
But this still gives no justification for my sibling to disrespect me like this. If anything it makes her behaviour even worse.
My family tries to defend her by saying that she has her own emotional issues. Except it seems more like covert narcissism to me that's her emotional issues. And that they are directly enabling it. My issues don't make me steal from my own family.
I have such an issue with change. Ordinary life situations can be torturous enough for me as it is without my family deliberately upsetting me for their own selfishness or their own amusement.
I feel like my mum is one of those "Christians" who Jesus would have an issue with for causing so much drama and brokenness in my family.
And this may sound horrible but if my sister is still stealing from me as it appears she might be, I kind of hope her husband is really horrible to her because I've lost nearly all sympathy and empathy for her at this point.
I've heard some people say that they steal their siblings' clothes back if they do this to them. But to me this doesn't make it sound like they're actually ok with it, it's just petty revenge instead of dealing with the root problem. The problem being that one person is an obnoxious jerk who apparently feels justified in what they do because otherwise they would stop. I don't think it's just poor impulse control. I think they could stop if they wanted. Otherwise you may as well say every rapist's problem is poor impulse control. And as a rape survivor myself, while the rapes were horrible and traumatic, being stolen from is insidiously so annoying and, unlike the rapes, it's never-ending. So as someone who has been subjected to both, I don't want either of those evils in my life. Even if one might objectively be worse than the other. It's apples and oranges. Different problems.
Not to mention that I don't want any of my sister's clothes, I like my own. And clearly she does too and that's her problem. I'm also not a huge fan of second-hand clothing or the idea of someone else wearing my clothing and covering it in their own sweat. Especially if they then give it back unwashed.
No one I've ever met has been ok with this, unless they are really close and respectful enough to give the stuff back afterwards and they're living in the same house so it's not an inconvenience.
But, as is pretty clear, me and my siblings do not live together and we don't have that kind of relationship, as my mum has basically ensured that we hate each other since birth.

Chapter One: The Awakening

In the quiet, unassuming town of Millhaven, nestled within the rolling hills of Monroe County, New York, a strange phenomenon began to unfold. What was once a peaceful community became the epicenter of a mysterious wave of genetic mutations, the likes of which the world had never seen. This small town would soon be known for harboring the secrets of the super mutant X-Gene.
Millhaven, with its population just shy of 10,000, was an idyllic place to grow up. Its streets were lined with maple trees, and the air was filled with the scent of blooming lilacs in spring. The town's charm lay in its simplicity—a single main street with family-owned shops, a local diner called Rosie’s, and a high school that served as the heart of the community.
However, the tranquility of Millhaven was shattered one fateful summer when bizarre and unexplainable events began to occur. It started with the children—those most innocent and unsuspecting. One by one, they began to exhibit strange abilities, powers that defied the laws of nature and logic.

Chapter Two: The First Signs

The first to notice something amiss was twelve-year-old Lily Thompson. A bright and curious girl, Lily was known for her vivid imagination and love for drawing. One afternoon, as she sat in her room sketching the old oak tree outside her window, she noticed something peculiar. As her pencil moved across the paper, the oak tree began to sway, despite the stillness of the wind.
Lily's sketches had come to life.
Panicked and excited, Lily rushed to show her parents, but they dismissed it as a child's fantasy. Yet, the phenomenon persisted. Her drawings of birds took flight, her sketches of flowers bloomed. Word spread among the children, and soon, other strange abilities began to emerge.
Fourteen-year-old Max Rivera discovered he could manipulate metal. It started with bending spoons in the school cafeteria, but soon escalated to reshaping entire lockers with a mere thought. Quiet and introverted, Max struggled to control his newfound power, fearing he might hurt someone inadvertently.
Eight-year-old Emma Davis found herself communicating with animals. Birds would perch on her shoulders, squirrels would follow her home, and even the town’s stray dogs seemed to understand her every command. Emma’s parents, bewildered and concerned, sought answers from doctors, but found none.

Chapter Three: The Gathering

As more children began to exhibit extraordinary abilities, a sense of unease settled over Millhaven. Parents were terrified, unsure of how to protect their children from powers they couldn't understand or control. The local government, overwhelmed and ill-equipped to handle such a crisis, sought help from outside sources.
Enter Dr. Evelyn Cross, a renowned geneticist from Rochester who had dedicated her career to studying the mutant X-Gene. Alerted to the strange happenings in Millhaven, she arrived with a team of researchers, determined to uncover the cause of the mutations.
Dr. Cross set up a temporary lab in the old Millhaven library, converting the basement into a research facility. She began by studying the affected children, running tests and gathering data. Her initial findings were alarming—the X-Gene had somehow become hyperactive, triggering abilities in children at an unprecedented rate.
Among the teenagers, a bond began to form. Lily, Max, and Emma, along with others like fifteen-year-old Jake Turner, who could control fire, and thirteen-year-old Mia Chen, who could turn invisible, found solace in each other’s company. They formed a secret group, calling themselves the Shadow Squad, vowing to protect one another and uncover the truth behind their powers.

Chapter Four: The Threat

As Dr. Cross delved deeper into her research, she uncovered a startling revelation. The X-Gene activation in Millhaven was not a natural occurrence—it had been triggered by an external force. Tracing the source, she discovered an abandoned military lab on the outskirts of town, hidden beneath layers of secrecy and overgrown foliage.
The lab, once a top-secret facility for genetic experimentation, had been shut down decades ago. However, it seemed that some experiments had continued in secret, with disastrous results. Dr. Cross hypothesized that a dormant virus, engineered to activate the X-Gene, had somehow been released into the environment, infecting the town’s children.
As the Shadow Squad ventured into the abandoned lab, they uncovered more than just answers. They found evidence of further experimentation—creatures that were once human, now twisted and grotesque. These beings, driven mad by their own powers, became an imminent threat to Millhaven.

Chapter Five: The Battle for Millhaven

Word of the mutations and the abandoned lab reached the wider world, attracting the attention of both the media and the military. Millhaven was quickly placed under quarantine, and a task force was sent to contain the situation. However, the government’s heavy-handed approach only heightened the town’s fear and tension.
Determined to protect their home, the Shadow Squad prepared for battle. Under Dr. Cross’s guidance, they honed their abilities, learning to control and amplify their powers. The once timid children transformed into a formidable team, ready to face the dangers lurking both within and outside their town.
The final confrontation took place in the heart of Millhaven. As the mutant creatures emerged from the shadows, the Shadow Squad fought valiantly to defend their town. Fire and metal clashed, invisible forces struck from unseen angles, and lifelike sketches leapt off the pages to join the fray. The children of Millhaven, once ordinary and unremarkable, became heroes.

Chapter Six: New Beginnings

In the aftermath of the battle, Millhaven began to rebuild. The military, recognizing the children’s potential, agreed to work with Dr. Cross to find a cure for the rogue virus and to provide training for the young mutants. The town, once on the brink of collapse, found a new sense of purpose and unity.
Lily, Max, Emma, Jake, and Mia, now celebrated as the protectors of Millhaven, continued to refine their abilities under Dr. Cross’s mentorship. They became the town’s guardians, always vigilant, always ready to face whatever new challenges might arise.
Millhaven, once a quiet and forgotten corner of Monroe County, became a beacon of hope and resilience. The legend of the Shadow Squad and the mystery of the X-Gene spread far and wide, inspiring others to embrace their differences and find strength in their unity.
And so, the story of the Rochester Phenomenon came to be—a tale of courage, friendship, and the unyielding human spirit in the face of the extraordinary.