Birthday ideas for boyfriends in october

Obligatory on mobile so awkward formatting and throwaway because he knows my reddit account. Long story.
I come to ask the Reddit crowd to be kind with me as I legitimately have no idea what to do. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 7 months now and are on the verge of a break-up because of several reasons.

• His long term ex girlfriend has been harassing us for 7 months. I've blocked her everywhere but she is adamant on contacting me. Her messages usually vary from asking for forgiveness, her moving on, I'm ugly and other insults about my appearance and identity, how she was the third party, how I was the third party, how desperate I am, how she cares about me, how she plans to destroy my academic and social life, etc.
  
• They had closure sex a few days before we went on our first date. In his defense, we were not exclusive back then and I told him before in the past that I'd probably find someone like him but not him specifically to date; and that I didn't date; so he only confessed because I pushed him to under the impression he liked another girl. Ex girlfriend shared some of their deleted conversation and he had been refusing to meet with her. They only met that day because she had gone to the front door of their home and up until the end of their conversation he was angry and asking for her to leave.
  
• He confessed the closure sex happened before we agreed to start seeing each other exclusively. But he didn't tell me exactly when it happened, just that it was recent to that conversation. When his ex girlfriend told me by blasting my face on social media the exact dates, he denied it happened on those specific days. He assured me for 4 months that it did not happen.
  
• According to him, she had been pestering him for a few weeks prior to that meeting and promised to stop her advances if they had one final time together. They had sex and a few days later, he told me that I shouldn't worry about her possibly pestering us because he had already "fixed" the problem.
  
• Ex girlfriend was not satisfied and kept messaging for him to go back to her with clips of her slashing her wrists, warning him that she would really kill herself, sending goodbye messages, etc. He at first would respond and tried to call her a few times to check if she was still alive but ended their conversation after he had mailed her remaining stuff back to her (a few essentials: IDs, etc.) After that, she waited for him outside his house several times to beg either inebriated or sober. Other times she would send messages through financial apps with those short messages because he had blocked her on everything even GMail.
  
• He says he doesn't want to go back to that relationship because of how emotionally draining it was. I can vouch for this detail because he had been saying this even before we liked each other, and I had seen their correspondences with each other over the years. She had an unbelievable amount of fake accounts she would cycle through because she would get verbally abusive (you're ugly, you deserve none of the success you have right now, posting his nudes, sending wrist slicing videos, you're lucky I decided to love you, etc.) and would blow up over seemingly nothing. Her own admission, she would get into fits that would end up either getting them into physical fights or him trying to hug her and sort of hold her down until she calms.
  
• He has her blocked everywhere but would occasionally view her Tiktok. He says he isn't in love with her anymore and does not desire a relationship, just that a part of him still cares for her and feels bad because he had promised that he was never going to leave but did.
  
• Up until recently, she was trying to reach out to my friends (people she does not know) and had been telling them I was a third party. She made a groupchat and asked my friends not to tell me and my boyfriend (they did tell us).
  
• She had messaged me multiple times that she knew where I lived and studied and that she was going to wait for me outside my buildings. I didn't want to talk to her before because I had already seen her tendencies based on their correspondences and her messages to me, and I still don't want to contact her even now. She talks shit about my identity, my vag*na, my deceased parents, everything she can target to get under my skin.
  

My boyfriend is adamant he does not hold romantic feelings for her anymore and that he isn't staying because I'm the safer option (in the sense that I am avoidant and have admittedly blindsided my past situationships/ partners and could very well do the same with him). He tells me he's not settling for me and that he genuinely wants to make our relationship work because he knows he only has one shot with me and that he feels genuine for me. It is easier for the both of us to leave the relationship because both are avoidant people, but he is trying to go against his trauma and avoidant tendencies to remain with me. He just fails sometimes (checking her tiktok, etc.)
Currently, we are very open with one another and have good communication (regular relationship checks, we never get into screaming matches). He has never called me names, he takes responsibility for his actions and has accepted blame for every single event that has happened (the lying, the tiktok, ex's harassment) and has not done those since we discussed each issue. Another is that he has been improving himself and his tendencies that hurt me emotionally as well (fixing problems on his own and only informing me they exist well after the fact, not sharing emotions, etc.). I have trouble vouching for this because we had just become friends later in the previous year, but from what I can logically deduce it is true.
THE PROBLEM, finally. I am losing feelings for him because I feel underappreciated, undervalued, and I genuinely feel like I was his second option. Due to the amalgamation of the things we have faced together, I am misinterpreting the pain from those into distrust for him.
To his credit, and if you remove the harassment problem, he has been a good boyfriend to me. We used to regularly go out on dates (used to because both of us are swamped with work, so now he just invites me to future plans after we finish said work), he cooks me food and pays for my meals whenever I allow it (gifts and gestures like this make me feel like I'm a callgirl so we avoid it), bringing me to events I would enjoy (movie showings, concerts, recreational parks) for free (he pays), is physically affectionate, and accompanies me in my commute everyday to and from work regardless if we have fought each other that day, would physically go to me just to talk, spends hours past his curfew if our serious conversations have not finished, etc.
I genuinely still want to work on my trust for him, I want to gain it back and move past our problems. I want to be able to support him because I do know I would also be fucked up if I came from said experience. I don't want to leave him alone because I empathize with what he has gone through and the effects they have on him, but I don't know how to help him. More importantly, I don't know how to process my own feelings about the matter.
This is an incredibly long post and I realize the easier way would be to leave. But I want to give our relationship a fighting chance before we break up. It's not the smart choice, it's not the beneficial choice either. But it's a choice I'm still considering.
TLDR: Because of harassment and other problems, I feel unloved and underappreciated by my boyfriend and am falling out of love. How do I stop losing feelings for him because of circumstances?

Ever since I was young, I have never really thought I was very pretty. I thought I was quite below average looking and struggled with my mental health as a result. My mother has also always pushed getting plastic surgery on me since I was young, specifically, double eyelid surgery. I am Korean, so I was naturally born with monolids and she finds them very ugly. I always told her no and got very angry at her every time she suggested it to me because even if I thought I was ugly. I personally did not want to get surgery for it.
Since I turned 18 and started going to university, she has pushed this idea of getting surgery on me weekly. She thinks my reason of "I just don't want to" and "I accept the way I am now" are nonsense and not a good reason. Today, I had a fight with her as she once again asked me why I didn't want to get surgery. Usually, after I say no, she says, "Don't you want to be pretty?" and I would respond with "So you think I'm ugly?" This time, instead of giving up, she went onto say that she thought I was not very pretty. Not ugly, not pretty, just a face. She said that that was a fact and that in the future, if i wanted to date boys or make friends, I had to be pretty which meant getting double eyelid surgery. No one would want someone who looked like me, especially not boys. I got extremely upset and started crying, in the middle of a public cafe too (man :/). She then told me that she would give me a week to think and that if I said no again, she would never bring it up again and that even if I begged her while I was older, she would refuse.
Some might think, "Well thats great! Just say no!" She said it in an extremely manipulative tone and my mother has a history of ghosting me and giving me the silent treatment when I don't agree with her (shes always been very abusive, if you can't tell by now). I don't know what to do. I've just recently began to accept my face and my eyes and this fight today has really hurt me. I'm worried that if I say no, my mother won't just move on and will make an even bigger deal out of this. At most, I am willing to try things like double eyelid tape and even go to a consultation as long as I am allowed to back out at anytime without being berated. I don't know what to do. Usually I just move on but what she said today really hurt me. Being told that my small eyes and the fact that I am not pretty are the reason it will be hard to make friends or a boyfriend, hurts.

me (21F) and my boyfriend (21M) have been dating for almost 3 years and i’m almost certain he has at least some degree of autism, he constantly misses social cues and struggles to understand other people's feelings, he unknowingly says things that might make someone feel bad but he doesn’t realise that possible outcome, and if he does make someone feel bad he cannot determine it by their reaction as well. this has been an issue at first bc before we started dating (as he refuses to get tested for autism and rejects the idea that he might have a condition) i just thought he was mean, but then i got to understand him and he almost never makes me feel bad anymore because i’m very explicit and direct on how i communicate with him. however, things started to get weird it relation to sex, whenever I wasn't feeling like it he continued to pressure me for hours in order to have sex with him, but it wasn't out of malice or manipulation it was just that he asked me continiously if i wanted to have sex now - this started to happen because before he would just start to touch me but i told him not to do that. now, the fact that he asks me to have sex a lot makes me feel bad and i always end up fucking with him even though i don't want to. before there were some moments when i did want to have sex and was sexually aroused, but latetly i dread and fear to be alone at home with him becuase i know he will want to have sex and insist a lot on it even if i say no. i have explained this to him a million times and i'm almost sure his issue is that he doesn't understand the way these things work (he's not touching me anymore and he's only politely insisting, but it makes me feel awful). on top, most of the times i agreed to sex i felt almost as if i was raped, i just wanted to get it over with and the sex kinda hurt sometimes because i wasn't wet or sexually aroused at all. i would never say he raped me or that he sexually assaulted me but i would say he has made me have a weird relationship with sex. i have spoken with him many times about this and everytime it ends up with him almost crying and feeling bad seeing he doesn't see it this way as that he didn't realise and he's really sorry. i love him so so much and i would love to spend the rest of my life with him, but given everything that has happened i'm afraid i'm longer sexually attracted to him anymore, i hate it when there's a possibiliy for sex i just don't want to have sex and try to avoid those situations by suggesting we go out, or that we watch a movie or do any other activities. the thing is he always ends up saying that 'i'm so hot no matter what we are doing' and he can't help but to get turned on. what do I do now? how can i solve this without breaking up with him? i don't want to end our relationship becuase of this

Her birthday isn't until August and I'm so excited to see her reaction, so I figured I'd share it here.
So my girlfriend is a collector of retro games hardware and has pretty much every console you can imagine. She's an engineer and as a hobby she repairs / modifies old gaming stuff. She avoids directly stating favorites, BUT I have kinda inferred that the Genesis is her favorite based on how many of those games she loves.
I'm a game developer and programmer. I'm mostly focused on new engines, and I'm new to my career, so I'm not an expert by any measure. I'm teaching myself procedural programming in C and some homebrew stuff so that I can hopefully make either a Genesis ROM for her in time for her birthday. I obviously won't have time to make anything really elaborate, but something custom and maybe a little gay and romantic will do the trick.
I don't see that many use-cases for the Anbernic Arc-D, outside of people who really really love the Sega Genesis. The controls look like a super good modern take on the Genesis / Saturn style controls. The entire design looks like a perfectly nostalgic thing.
So for her birthday, I'm going to get her an Anbernic Arc D with a custom Genesis game that I made just for her.
I can't wait for her to open it, I'll already have it charged and have the ROMs loaded up. And I'll show her where to navigate to.
I just really wanted to share that. I think it's such a great gift idea. I've never really nailed the gift giving before but I'm inspired to do this for her.

TL;DR I (14F) don't know what to do about my friend/classmate (15M) who has love-hate (this is kind of an exaggeration) feelings for me.
We're in the same class and graduating 8th grade in less than a month and I'm asking for help because I don't want to be the villain in his life. I'm always stressed about hurting people and I only ever tried to be kind and honest, but I was stupid and I messed up this time. I don't want him to remember me as the exact thing I am not. I hate conflict and being mean. I would rather compromise than hurt somebody's feelings, but now I am just at loss.
We started talking more in October and then got pretty close in November and December. We'll call him D. We went out mid December at the mall to buy a book for school and I ended up buying Christmas presents. He helped me pick stuff for all of my friends and then we ate. It was very much a date-like hangout and we even walked arm in arm to the bus stop at the mall. He also walked me from the bus stop to my front door.
Fast forward to a day before our school's Christmas event. I told my friends that I kind of liked him and they convinced me to tell him. I told him and we texted some more at home then we agreed to talk the next day after the event. That evening I thought about it all and I realized that I wasn't ready for a relationship. I am 14 after all and I have the most important exam of my life so far at the end of the school year (this is just the schooling system in my country). The next day I avoided him and then at home I explained everything through text because I was too anxious to do it face-to-face. I was a wimp and I wish I had the guts to actually talk to him. I apologized countless times. I felt horrible and I can't even imagine how it was for him. I still kinda hate myself for it, but at the time I believed it was for the best.
I thought about the whole ordeal and it made me realize I might have attachment issues. I'm so obsessed with being loved (I grew up very lonely) that I feel a certain level of romantic attraction towards anyone who gives me a little more attention (especially men which I know is terrible). I also don't mean this as an excuse, but rather as an explanation to why I acted the way I did. I liked how D made me feel about myself, not actually him (this is horrible, I know). After I explained everything I felt he was cool about it and I actually thought that maybe things were okay. I told him i wasn't going out until after New Year's because I was very busy with family (I wasn't avoiding him purposely I was actually busy) yet for about a week straight he asked me 2 times every day where I was which was kinda weird and made me not want to go out at all even after New Year's.
Fast forward to this March when a common acquaintance of ours (not in our class) talked to D because he'd heard from a friend of his that D still liked me. D told this acquaintance that he does indeed still like me, that I look good and that he likes my big breasts (he said this in a much less respectful way). I was shocked because I couldn't fathom D still liking me after I'd been a total witch to him. We'd been ignoring each other mostly ever since December and even though we agreed to stay friends and I was very confused.
A few days later I was talking to a good friend of mine, D's deskmate, and mentioned the acquaintance who told me D still liked me. I just repeated something funny he said. I didn't say anything about D because he was right there, but D got mad (he probably found out I knew stuff) and broke a pencil. I'd seen that he had problems with anger and jealousy (he used to read my texts to my online friend on the other side of the world who is also a guy and got upset when I'd say they're personal and we weren't even together), but I didn't think it was that bad.
My friend (we'll call her R) told me she found out from another friend in our group that I was driving D crazy with telling his deskmate (a very close friend of mine) about stuff like weird fanfiction about my favourite singer (Gerard Way) and my variety of dirty jokes. From what R understood, he didn't like me speaking about sexual stuff (I haven't done anything like that, it's just an interesting topic to me) around him. I didn't understand why it would bother him, but apparently it did. Maybe jealousy? I don't know.
Nothing much happened until this Saturday when our whole class was taking album photos. The basic and typically "popular" girl in our class invited my group (the 7 emo girls basically) alongside her group (her another 3 people) to the new Japanese restaurant in town. We get along fine with them, though they kinda gossip about us sometimes, so we gladly agreed to eat with them. A girl in our group (whom D liked last year; she was much harsher in rejecting him - she blocked him on all platforms) is a tad bit closer to the popular girl, so the two of them made the reservation for 11 people at the restaurant.
During the shoot, D and another classmate that we're not very close friends with (they're chill, we just don't talk all that much) overheard our sushi plans and asked me if we were going. I said yes and tried to kindly say that we have a reservation already for 11 people and that they can tag along, but sit at another table. I felt bad because I've been excluded countless times in social situations in my life and I didn't want them to feel that. Their parents who were also there questioned me and I was too ashamed to lie, so I said that yes, we had a reservation. D and the other person didn't come in the end.
That evening I texted D apologizing and explaining that I was just invited and that I wasn't the one making the reservation. He said that it's okay and not my fault and he said that the other person was also not mad at me. He asked me why i was so obsessed with apologizing and I made a sharp remark I didn't think through about being annoyed at my friends' insensitivity about excluding them. He asked me why I was telling him all that and I told him to forget it. He encouraged me to continue and just speak my mind. I said no and told him I only had a question. I asked "do you still like me?" and I proceeded to explain why that would be impossible. He said I was changing the subject and I didn't realize that he was the one doing it in reality. He told me again to just speak and that nobody else will know whatever I tell him. I refused, but he somehow convinced me and I made a small confession about being lonely and feeling like only 3 people truly like me. It wasn't as personal as it may seem because I have much deeper feelings I have never told anyone, but I was still shocked that he somehow made me spit out things it takes a lot of hard work to get me to say as I am a very introverted and closed off person. For some context I was literally shaking and hyperventilating from anxiety throughout the whole conversation. I asked him again if he still liked me and he responded in the morning, completely ignoring the question and asking about a math test we recently took.
Yesterday evening, on Sunday, I talked to another classmate and friend (again not very close, but he's nice) whom I'll call L. L told me D had sent the group chat with the other person who I apologized to for the sushi thing, L and another classmate (I presume) screenshots of our whole conversation (even though he promised he'd keep his mouth shut). L sent me a screenshot of D saying I played him before and after I rejected him and said I manipulated him and only pretended to be interested in the things he liked just to get close to him (for the record, I'm a big listener, I love hearing my friends talk about their passions and interests). He also said he hated me. I was shocked and very upset because while telling me everything is alright and that the mess in my mind will get better, he was talking nonsense about me to others and sharing private information.
I told my friends about all of this. R said it's all my fault and that I did give him false hopes even after I rejected him and that I give him too much importance. She basically said I'm a bad person because I told D I wasn't ready to date anybody after saying I liked him. She probably believes I did it for kicks, just like D thinks, but I swear on everything I have that I'm just very dumb and I have no idea how to navigate human relations. I'm a massive people pleaser and it shows. Two friends said that it is what it is and another four said that it is totally not my fault and that I did not give him false hopes after I rejected him and that I barely even acknowledged him during that time (I also think so, but R said I kept flirting with him - I ignored him completely and he ignored me just the same so I am very confused as to what she deems "flirting"). They said I communicated clearly that it's not him, but rather a personal issue and that I am very sorry and I will respect his decision if he doesn't want us to talk or be friends at all anymore. I am in a dilemma.
I feel like a bad bad bad person for what I did and how I acted and I have no idea if R is right and that I did keep giving him false hopes or if all of my other friends are right and it's not my fault. I never thought that my behavior (existing in his perimeter) would be considered as flirting, but apparently R thinks otherwise. In R's opinion sending him two TikToks in 3 months and talking to him 3 maybe 4 times through text and another two face-to-face from December to now was too much attention.
So, am I a horrible person who deserves unhappiness or is D just overreacting and being manipulative and toxic? Please help this is really messing with my mind.

Before anyone asks, I am in therapy. I'm already in treatment, but I have C-PTSD so it's a long process to heal from everything.
I've had sex twice in my life, both times with my first ex. I already hated/feared sex during that relationship, so it doesn't seem like that's the real origin of my negative/fearful feelings towards sex but idk where it came from. I guess general childhood trauma can still mess with your sexual drive, maybe. Anyway, my first ex basically guilt tripped me into losing my virginity to him that first time and the second time I did initiate it, I'm not sure why. Either way even if I wasn't already traumatized, that did CRITICAL damage to the way I think and feel about sexual intimacy. When we broke up not too long after, I've dated exclusively online/long distance for 6 years until last year, when I started dating my current boyfriend.
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year now and sexual intimacy has always been a bit of a... thingy. We kiss, we make out, do that "rubbing against each other when making out" thing, grope etc. but nothing beyond that. I am his first girlfriend, he has no prior experience. Everything to him is new. Idk how relevant this is, even in my own picture, but he's also autistic and generally has a hard time identifying and communicating his feelings. He knows my past and my traumas and he knows that even the topic of "sex" or "sexual intimacy" is hard. But I didn't realize until last night that the combination of my trauma and his lack of experience unknowingly caused him to internalize my trauma responses and has made him ashamed of any sexual feelings he holds towards me, viewing them as something "bad", as if he's still sexually assaulting me by having those thoughts alone. I've been forming a timeline in my head and connecting the dots and apparently he's been feeling this way for at least half a year, bottling it up and being scared of talking about it with me. It took a mental breakdown on his end to finally ""confess to it"". He was so ashamed of admitting to having sexual feelings towards me, his GIRLFRIEND, that he couldn't tell me unless I turned the other way and he was sobbing for like 5 minutes before finally opening up to something healthy and normal like it's a crime. And it hurts so much to realize that I unintentionally planted those ideas into his head, like it's wrong to feel sexually attracted to your girlfriend of a year. MY traumas made HIM associate sexual attraction with feelings of shame. It took me A LOT of courage to admit to him that I also feel sexually attracted to him, but that I just like for those thoughts to stay inside my head and to not express them outward. I just had to do it and finally be open about it. I'm happy I did it, even tho it makes me feel the same way as it made him feel. I know it's bad and unhealthy.
I feel so many different things. I feel guilty for not bringing it up myself. I did notice that doing anything slightly sexual made him clingy and sad afterward, as if he did something wrong. But I never brought it up because they also made me feel awkward/bad/scared, for different reasons. I also feel guilty for restricting the topic of sex and making it something that's only discussable in a hypothetical manner, not relating to us. Either way, I'm glad we talked about it. I've been feeling that something has been wrong for quite some time, but I didn't know what. Still, I don't want these issues to persist. I need to find a way to feel comfortable with discussing things like these. It just feels like if I make it a discussable topic, it lowers the bar to actually doing anything sexual and I don't want that. I need more time, years probably. I know he's patient and he will 100% respect that but it still sucks. Idk what to do.

I've had sex twice in my life, both times with my first ex. I already hated/feared sex during that relationship, so it doesn't seem like that's the real origin but idk where it came from. I guess general childhood trauma can still mess with your sexual drive, maybe. Anyway, my first ex basically guilt tripped me into losing my virginity to him that first time and the second time I did initiate it, I'm not sure why. Either way even if I wasn't already traumatized, that did CRITICAL damage to the way I think and feel about sexual intimacy. When we broke up not too long after, I've dated exclusively online/long distance for 6 years until last year, when I started dating my current boyfriend.
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year now and sexual intimacy has always been a bit of a... thingy. We kiss, we make out, do that "rubbing against each other when making out" thing, grope etc. but nothing beyond that. I am his first girlfriend, he has no prior experience. Everything to him is new. Idk how relevant this is, even in my own picture, but he's also autistic and generally has a hard time identifying and communicating his feelings. He knows my past and my traumas and he knows that even the topic of "sex" or "sexual intimacy" is hard. But I didn't realize until last night that the combination of my trauma and his lack of experience unknowingly caused him to internalize my trauma responses and has made him ashamed of any sexual feelings he holds towards me, viewing them as something "bad", as if he's still sexually assaulting me by having those thoughts alone. I've been forming a timeline in my head and connecting the dots and apparently he's been feeling this way for at least half a year, bottling it up and being scared of talking about it with me. It took a mental breakdown on his end to finally ""confess to it"". He was so ashamed of admitting to having sexual feelings towards me, his GIRLFRIEND, that he couldn't tell me unless I turned the other way and he was sobbing for like 5 minutes before finally opening up to something healthy and normal like it's a crime. And it hurts so much to realize that I unintentionally planted those ideas into his head, like it's wrong to feel sexually attracted to your girlfriend of a year. MY traumas made HIM associate sexual attraction with feelings of shame. It took me A LOT of courage to admit to him that I also feel sexually attracted to him, but that I just like for those thoughts to stay inside my head and to not express them outward. I just had to do it and finally be open about it. I'm happy I did it, even tho it makes me feel the same way as it made him feel. I know it's bad and unhealthy.
I feel so many different things. I feel guilty for not bringing it up myself. I did notice that doing anything slightly sexual made him clingy and sad afterward, as if he did something wrong. But I never brought it up because they also made me feel awkward/bad/scared, for different reasons. I also feel guilty for restricting the topic of sex and making it something that's only discussable in a hypothetical manner, not relating to us. Either way, I'm glad we talked about it. I've been feeling that something has been wrong for quite some time, but I didn't know what. Still, I don't want these issues to persist. I need to find a way to feel comfortable with discussing things like these. It just feels like if I make it a discussable topic, it lowers the bar to actually doing anything sexual and I don't want that. I need more time, years probably. I know he's patient and he will 100% respect that but it still sucks. Idk what to do.

I F24 messed up everything. I’ve been with my partner M35 for almost 3 years. I know the age difference is big, but in his defence I lied about my age on the dating app so that I could meet older men. He knew from the first date and decided to still give it a try. Anyways, we’ve always been perfect. Never a single argument, we always resolve everything. He’s bought a new flat and is waiting for the keys, which should’ve happened weeks ago but solicitors are awful. For the last 2-3 months we’ve been living at my mums house as he had to move out quickly of his old flat due to a crazy roommate and my mum was more than happy to have him here. This is where the issues started. My mum is very dependant on me emotionally, more than what is healthy, so is my younger sister. I’ve been struggling to be a daughter and a girlfriend. I’ve been feeling suffocated etc, whatever.
Anyways, thoughts started running through my mind about the relationship and doubts, I’ve never moved in with a man before, what if it all becomes a shit show? We usually have sex everyday but that’s been difficult at my mums. We always reconnect with each other through sex and without it, we’ve been tense. So to the cheating- he went on a business trip for 2 weeks. I meet up with friends on a weekly basis for an activity. I’d like to say my partner and I are very flirty with everyone, it’s just how we are together and separately. My friends know this and we always have a little flirt. It’s 2 girls and 1 guy. When we travel for dinner after our activity, the two girls go together as they’re closer and I go with the guy, someone I’ve known since I was 5. We were always flirty as kids and teens but were never close or anything. Anyways, in the car he kisses me and after a while I kiss back. I really enjoyed it, we were flirty all night. I knew it was wrong but it felt so good to have something new and exciting. I didn’t want him, I knew he wouldn’t be as good as my partner or anywhere near as fun, but for some reason I loved it. For the rest of the week I was excited about it. I don’t know why, I’m young and dumb and then it hit me how bad it all was. It wasn’t just a kiss, it was quite passionate, there was grabbing and touching and afterwards flirty messages that I’ve had to delete out of disgust and guilt.
The guilt is eating me alive. I know I need to tell him but I don’t know how. It’s his birthday in 2 days, we have a huge party on the weekend. Regardless of that, how do I tell him while he’s still living at my mums? What if he wants to go somewhere else, where will he go? I don’t know how he’ll react. He loves me so much. I love him so much, but clearly I lack respect. I can’t even use the drunk excuse as I was sober when I was texting the days after. Do I wait until he gets the new flat so he can make the decision to leave and have his own space? He’s my best friend, my confidant, my comedian, my sexy man, my home, and i fucked it all for what? A passionate kiss to make me forget my living situation?
This is no excuse, but it has been hard at home. My mum goes through a lot, I am basically a second parent to my sister who is now experimenting with drugs, things aren’t easy and I always went to my boyfriends as an escape at times. I think I went crazy without that escape and made a stupid mistake. The worst part is that I enjoyed the thrill when it happened. I’m so angry at myself. I still get butterflies for my boyfriend, I’ve been thrilled enough. Now I can’t believe I’ve done something to hurt him. I feel it’s best to not tell him and move on but at the same time it’s eating me alive and he needs to know so he can decide what to do. He’s said in the past he’d forgive me for cheating (it was a weird topic we were on) but I can’t hold him to that. I have to tell him, but when? How? If he does forgive me, how do I forgive myself? I can’t imagine him looking at me differently. I’ve been acting weird for weeks because I feel I don’t deserve him, and I don’t. He makes these grand gestures of his love, he genuinely loves me so so much and I’m about to ruin it all.. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I’m descending into madness, all deserved, but I want it to stop. Please help me
TLDR- I doubted my relationship with my partner of almost 3 years and kissed an old friend, it’s eating me alive. Don’t know how to tell my bf as we are both currently living in my mother’s house until he gets his flat keys.

Hello all,
My girlfriend and I have been dating for 4 months. Her birthday is coming up in 6 weeks. We agreed that for her first birthday, I'm going to take her out shopping. She agreed and is excited over it. But I do want to give her a surprise gift. Ideally it should be something that holds sentimental value, or something that is unique. Do you guys have any ideas on what I could get her? I suck at gifting but I really want to surprise her with something unique. It does not have to be expensive or fancy, I just want the wow factor.

Hi everybody
Looking for some input, as I'm working my way towards a 1st YouTube channel and wish to record video with "good enough quality that it does not look too amateurish". Please note this is not a "for profit" channel but educational for my fellow caregivers with family members affected with Alzheimer's.
I was planning to shoot on my Pixel 6, but alas my USB-C port is temperamental as gear you put in may or not stay connected even when plugged in. To add to my situation, the USB-C on this phone is soldered on making it very hard to replace. I did a fair amount of cleaning and reading to tell me I need to look at an alternative and am waiting for the Pixel 9 for an upgrade, due October 2024 apparently. The content will mostly be filmed indoor in our house and I have lighting. Obviously trying not to buy something for 4-5 months of use :)
So my next step is: what do I own which can do the job? This is where I'm looking for wisdom an advice. Here is what I can use on-hand:

• iPad Air 4th gen: wife's device. I can use it but is this device going to deliver decent results?
• Canon T3i, my trusty old DSLR, but it caps at 4GB/file due to it's "generation" hence 12 mins/clip and I may need longer
• Canon VIXIA HF M31 camcorder: oldie but goodie I got when the kids were still kids. It does full HD but would the other 2 devices offer better recording quality? I always found the device sluggish as well

I did get the HollyLand Lark M1 microphone with USB-C & Lightning cables so I should be all set for sound.
Advice welcome, if you have alternative ideas I'll take all suggestions.
Thanks!

So I (18F), have been dating my boyfriend (20M), for two months now, and I thought it was going really well. We had really good chemistry since the beginning(met on Tinder btw), are both very attracted to each other, go on frequent dates, and this is probably the best connection I’ve had with someone in a relationship.
Fast forward to yesterday, and we were hanging out as usual, and then he tells me he has something serious to tell me. That being that our relationship won’t last forever due to our outlooks on life being different in the next couple years. I just finished my freshman year of college and want to eventually pursue a PhD, while he wants to explore Europe in a few years and eventually move there. I’ve expressed how I would also want to do that but I would need to finish school first.
So then he offers to keep the relationship going for the next few years till this time, as he doesn’t want it to end, and neither do I. But now I’m questioning if I want to be in a relationship where the ending is known, almost like planned obsolescence, as I get very attached to people over time and the breakup might be more difficult in the future.
He has also been supportive during this by giving me space and time to think about it, and has expressed that he doesn’t like to see me sad about it.
So is an unconventional relationship like this a good idea, or will it just result in even more ruin in the end.
TLDR: BF came to me saying the shelf life of our relationship will only be a couple years given our goals in life, but wants to continue it for those few years.

CONTEXT: noncredibledefense is a shitposting subreddit with a heavy focus on Western militaries which exploded in popularity during the War in Ukraine. Most members were lock-step in their views with each other, e.g. NATO good, China bad, Russia lmfao... until October 7th and the invasion of Gaza. While reddit generally skews to supporting Palestinian causes, noncredibledefense has been generally supportive of Israel and their war against Hamas, although not to say that there isn't contention with the topic having a noticeable split. One meme is shared that is remarkably critical of Israel for the sub, and it is immediately ratio'd with the top armchair generals arguing over the good, the bad and the ugly.
One user suggests that life in Gaza was fine

people in gaza lived fine before hamas. who built their houses?

Who bombed them?

maybe don't cross a border to slaughter 1300 innocent people. belgium doesn't do that shit, no one is invading belgium. why can't gaza be more like belgium? if you don't want war, don't start one. atleast then when someone else decides to start a war in your place of the world, you can have the moral highground. how many israeli's would be dead if israel did not have iron dome?

FFS, look back a few decades. Look at how the Israelis treat them. Terrorism is never right but they have a good reason to be mad.

Just don't look back more than like 5 years or you'll see all the resolutions ignored, rockets launched, terror attacks committed, or if you go then further then literal wars.

And do two wrongs make a right?

Who is launching rockets from them? You know, doing a war crime that removes protection from civilian objects.

So Israel can stoop to Hamas' level? Hamas did it so Isreal can?

Launching attacks from civilian areas = war crime. Use of non-targeted munitions = war crime. Using targeted munitions to destroy missile bases in civilian areas =/= war crime. Israel isn't stooping to Hamas's level at all

And can both sides be wrong in a conflict?

Yeah sorry, this is a CIA-ass subreddit. Israel can do as much genocide as it likes as far as the people here are concerned, it's the wrong target audience for this meme.

Or, perhaps maybe, Israel should stop using civilians as meat shields. Maybe both sides are bad (wild, i know), and not wanting to support terrorists is good

Lmao, both sides are bad, I don't support hamas, but you must realise that this subreddit thinks that Israel are the good guys right? You're literally already being downvoted for saying that... (or maybe it's the freudian slip at the start of your comment)

Lmao, both sides are bad, I don't support hamas, but you must realise that this subreddit thinks that Israel are the good guys right? You're literally already being downvoted for saying that... (or maybe it's the freudian slip at the start of your comment)

One user sarcastically responds to the idea of showing mercy to your enemy, and misses the irony

Ah yes they should go the "be nice to people slaughtering you" route. Then the extremist beliefs have no reason to exist so you will pretend they don't exist.

Novel idea I know but maybe clear out the building with people. Fallujah wasn't exactly leveled by the end of it and we too, to the best of my memory refrained from sending hospitals, places of worship, and schools (the places civilians normally run to as the opposite of military targets) 500kg explosive care packages from orbit.

Is it antisemitic to be against Israel existing?

Israel gets away with too much shit. It’s apparently antisemitism to be against Israel or voice opposition to their policies.

It's antisemitism to be against the existence of Israel because it is the only country that protects jews. And it has to do a lot of protecting. They're fighting terrorists who target civilians and use human shields. That is not Israel's choice. It's antisemitism to think jews evil because they are forced to deal with a problem that you would do worse at. I don't know where you're from but I could say your country HAS done far worse than Israel and I'd probably be right. more follows

Fuck off with that bullshit, ethnic cleansing is ethnic cleansing no matter the context, you’re coping hard for shit the likes of Russia does and routinely gets condemned for. Hamas commits terrorist attacks, Israel responds consistently by bombing civilians/neighborhoods/hospitals trying to kill said terrorist group and blockaids the region, only to ensure the radicalization of the population while strengthening the hand of said terrorists in the long run.

As usual, the I/P war cannot be discussed without some drama occurring and it demonstrates how divisive it is when a subreddit meant to support Western defense is thrown into chaos over the topic.

I F24 messed up everything. I’ve been with my partner M35 for almost 3 years. I know the age difference is big, but in his defence I lied about my age on the dating app so that I could meet older men. He knew from the first date and decided to still give it a try. Anyways, we’ve always been perfect. Never a single argument, we always resolve everything. He’s bought a new flat and is waiting for the keys, which should’ve happened weeks ago but solicitors are awful. For the last 2-3 months we’ve been living at my mums house as he had to move out quickly of his old flat due to a crazy roommate and my mum was more than happy to have him here. This is where the issues started. My mum is very dependant on me emotionally, more than what is healthy, so is my younger sister. I’ve been struggling to be a daughter and a girlfriend. I’ve been feeling suffocated etc, whatever.
Anyways, thoughts started running through my mind about the relationship and doubts, I’ve never moved in with a man before, what if it all becomes a shit show? We usually have sex everyday but that’s been difficult at my mums. We always reconnect with each other through sex and without it, we’ve been tense. So to the cheating- he went on a business trip for 2 weeks. I meet up with friends on a weekly basis for an activity. I’d like to say my partner and I are very flirty with everyone, it’s just how we are together and separately. My friends know this and we always have a little flirt. It’s 2 girls and 1 guy. When we travel for dinner after our activity, the two girls go together as they’re closer and I go with the guy, someone I’ve known since I was 5. We were always flirty as kids and teens but were never close or anything. Anyways, in the car he kisses me and after a while I kiss back. I really enjoyed it, we were flirty all night. I knew it was wrong but it felt so good to have something new and exciting. I didn’t want him, I knew he wouldn’t be as good as my partner or anywhere near as fun, but for some reason I loved it. For the rest of the week I was excited about it. I don’t know why, I’m young and dumb and then it hit me how bad it all was. It wasn’t just a kiss, it was quite passionate, there was grabbing and touching and afterwards flirty messages that I’ve had to delete out of disgust and guilt.
The guilt is eating me alive. I know I need to tell him but I don’t know how. It’s his birthday in 2 days, we have a huge party on the weekend. Regardless of that, how do I tell him while he’s still living at my mums? What if he wants to go somewhere else, where will he go? I don’t know how he’ll react. He loves me so much. I love him so much, but clearly I lack respect. I can’t even use the drunk excuse as I was sober when I was texting the days after. Do I wait until he gets the new flat so he can make the decision to leave and have his own space? He’s my best friend, my confidant, my comedian, my sexy man, my home, and i fucked it all for what? A passionate kiss to make me forget my living situation?
This is no excuse, but it has been hard at home. My mum goes through a lot, I am basically a second parent to my sister who is now experimenting with drugs, things aren’t easy and I always went to my boyfriends as an escape at times. I think I went crazy without that escape and made a stupid mistake. The worst part is that I enjoyed the thrill when it happened. I’m so angry at myself. I still get butterflies for my boyfriend, I’ve been thrilled enough. Now I can’t believe I’ve done something to hurt him. I feel it’s best to not tell him and move on but at the same time it’s eating me alive and he needs to know so he can decide what to do. He’s said in the past he’d forgive me for cheating (it was a weird topic we were on) but I can’t hold him to that. I have to tell him, but when? How? If he does forgive me, how do I forgive myself? I can’t imagine him looking at me differently. I’ve been acting weird for weeks because I feel I don’t deserve him, and I don’t. He makes these grand gestures of his love, he genuinely loves me so so much and I’m about to ruin it all.. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I’m descending into madness, all deserved, but I want it to stop. Please help me
TLDR- I doubted my relationship with my partner of almost 3 years and kissed an old friend, it’s eating me alive. Don’t know how to tell my bf as we are both currently living in my mother’s house until he gets his flat keys.

My boyfriend (20) is part of a playwriting programme/workshop that will soon end in a showcase of all the created plays. I look forward to going to the showcase with him and I would like to give him a small gift on the day to show how proud I am.
His birthday is two weeks after the event so I have already exhausted my general gift ideas and most of my budget. I considered getting him a cute notebook but I already gave him one recently and he mostly writes on his laptop.
He enjoys writing, reading (but gets his books from the library), cooking and baking. He likes orcas, cats, birds, scented candles, ties (but already has a lot), fidget toys, women's hockey, drag queens, British comedy, medieval literature and Shakespeare. We're a gay couple and his play has queer themes as well. He doesn't drink alcohol, doesn't want to get flowers and sporty activities are off the table right now as he is still recovering from a surgery.
I appreciate any ideas, especially those that are related to playwriting. Thank you!

I finally got my official MS diagnosis today after seven months of knowing I already had it, my neurologist just took ages to confirm it. Thankfully no lumbar puncture!! I have very typical MS so it wasn't needed.
In the space of 10 months I had 3 attacks, the second being optic neuritis last august days after my 18th birthday which led to me getting an mri and discovering I have MS in October. Would this be considered very active MS? Because every time I look it up online it says so but I'm still not sure.
Anyway, reason I'm saying all this is because I don't know of anyone as young as me with MS and feel sort of alone if that makes sense? I just don't have anyone in my age group who can relate to me. I'm already sort of used to it as I have other lifelong disabilities but MS feels a lot different and l used to always associate it with old people (please forgive me 😭) just from what little l'd seen in the media. I also often feel too young to talk here and feel kinda stupid for it lol but I know I'm just being insecure. Is there anyone else who was diagnosed at a young age?

Made a throwaway account to write this.
My boyfriend and me have been together for about a year and a half. When we first met, I weighed a lot less than I do now (about 35lbs). I’ve been battling an eating disorder basically my whole life, ever since I can remember, and my weight has fluctuated a LOT over the years - at one point I lost about 150lbs. I’ve gained about 50lbs back however, maybe a little more (I haven’t weighed myself in a while). I’m fully aware I have a very problematic relationship with food and dieting, and my body shows this.
I gave that detail because I want to be clear I’m under no illusions - I know I’m not at a healthy weight right now, and I know that I need to lose weight. I don’t blame my boyfriend at all for feeling this way.
The conversation happened yesterday - he very kindly, calmly and politely implied that he wanted me to lose some weight for my own personal happiness - not his. He said that if I didn’t lose a single pound forever he would still be incredibly happy with me, that he still finds me attractive, and that if the only way I can lose weight is through very unhealthy dieting then he doesn’t want me to do it. But overall, he wants me to be happy and healthy - which means losing weight.
I am not angry with him at all, and I completely agree with him and his point of view. I know it’s not fair at all that I look different now to when we first met. He deserves to be with the person he found attractive at the beginning of our relationship.
Obviously, though, this hurt. A lot. Having such a disordered relationship with food means I’m hypersensitive to this topic, and hearing loudly and clearly that he thinks I’m too big and wants me to lose weight was basically like walking into my deepest nightmare, all the worst things I’ve been imagining. I know it’s not realistic to want my boyfriend to find me attractive simply for being me - I know that physical appearance matters, and I know that he’s not a bad person for finding me more attractive when I was smaller.
My question, though, is this - how can I remain confident in myself, and my body, and be undressed with him, now I know he feels this way? We have always had a very active sex life, which has stayed the same throughout our relationship. Now, however, I’m absolutely terrified to get undressed in front of him, and to maintain the active sex life we used to have. The idea of him looking at me naked makes me feel sick and want to cry, and I feel like when we have sex I’ll just spend the entire time imagining that he’s repulsed by me. Is it even possible for a man to want to have sex with someone they think is too fat? Isn’t it likely that he’s going to stray and want to find someone more his ideal body type in the meantime? Is it fair for me to expect him to stay with me?
Also, just to be clear, I fully intend to lose weight, and have already started as of today.
Any advice on how to maintain confidence and whether he is still capable of being attracted to me would be great, because right now I’m really scared that I won’t ever be able to feel hot around him again.
TLDR: My boyfriend kindly (and correctly) told me I need to lose weight and now I don’t feel like I can ever get undressed with him again. Is it possible he still finds me attractive even if he thinks I should lose weight?

Background: Me and my boyfriend met each other last year in June 2023 online through mutual friends. We met inrl and spent the whole summer together (June & July). We also flew to the country where we met during winter break (Dec 2023) and spent a week or so together.
Our relationship was pretty healthy until a few months ago. We always managed a way to resolve conflict without holding any grudge against each other.
I admit that I have the tendency to be controlling and get mad at small things, and my boyfriend tends to be dense and shut down whenever he is upset or when we have disagreements. We both worked through our issues till I got into bad terms with his now Ex Best Friend.
Edited: I got into an argument with his friends (Liam and Ava) and he sided with them. He realized his mistake too late after I talked to him.
Fast forward to January 3, 2024. We gave our instagram accounts to each other prior to this for fun. We had nothing to hide. I had gotten curious if he still talked to Liam, and I saw their chats. It shattered my world. Liam was encouraging my bf to break up with me, and my boyfriend seemed to just agreed?? (This was between September- October 2023). The chats of them was just Liam who kept telling my boyfriend to break up with me while he just agreed. Liam also encouraged my bf to talk to this girl because "sometimes its good to talk to girls that are not your girlfriend". That is what he said word for word. I actually wanted to leave him at that point for that betrayal, but he kept asking for a second chance and that he would be better. I forgave him, but of course he broke my trust and the grudges against him started to build up. I demanded some type of compensation to make up for what he did, but it was never enough since we were LDR.
I started to become more irritated towards him and one day he snapped and ignored me for a full day. From then on we just argued and argued and I kept demanding him to chage and be better for me. He said he lost his patience because no matter what he did it was never enough for me to forgive him so he stoped trying altogether. He also now holds a lot of grudges towards me because of all the times ive wanted to fix arguments now instead of letting him sleep. The thing about me is Im the type of person who does not like prolonging problems and wanna fix things now. He also just sleep while im crying and having a mental breakdown. He would always leave call nowadays and give me the silent teeatment no matter how much I apologise, when sometimes it is not even my fault. Everything I do just annoys him and he is constanly mad at me. When he is at his peak he kept breaking up with me and I would always beg for him back, this has happened more than 5 times. Out of pure anger, he would also tell me he hates me and does not love me and I am annoying and say "fuck you". I admit I have swore at him but I immediately stopped and havent done it the moment I did. I miss how he treated me in the beginning. I feel like im the only one trying to save this relationship.
I havent seen him since January 3, 2024, and I will see him again on July, if we are together still. I really dont want to break up because I still love him so much no matter what he did.
What do I do? How do we both fix our relationship? Is it too late? Are his actions forgivable?

Hello guys, I have a 6 month baby and a very loving and caring husband I love very much. After I got pregnant my husband and I had to move to my parents house so we can save some money and move to Japan where he is originally from, he is a tourist in my country and is staying here on visa which is running out very soon so we decided to move to his home for time time being. I am going to start a business there, we saved up enough money for that and we are overall excited to start our new life there with our baby but my parents are broken about this which is expected. Ever since our baby was born my mother basically just toke him from us nonstop and take control of everything. He was not allowed to make any decisions about what goes on with his diet or just anything really he has been completely shut out by my mother. I am also completely shut out as well, I cannot make decisions as a mother or she will lecture me about my methods and call me abusive or that I am neglecting him. I wanted to wait til 6 months to start him on solid food and she has been feeding him anything she wants to since he was 4 months which I found out much much later and begged her to not do which then she promised not to then continued to do so behind our backs. In any social gathering like visiting friends and family she does not let me have our baby back she sprints to take him immediately and people have been asking her about anything related to him even though I am directly beside her.. I feel like I am not his mother 80% of the time. So we decided to move out much much earlier than we planned to do, it will negatively affect our future. So after I told my mother that we are leaving next month instead of October she went insane and is now trying to turn me against my husband in an attempt to keep us here. She has been attacking my husband's parents who they have never met and telling me that once I get to Japan they will take everything from me including our baby and kick me out on the streets and my husband will make me work while he does nothing. My husband cannot work here because he cannot get a work permit and he wants to rush to Japan so he can finally get to make money for us as well. He was working while he had his permit and has been tolerating my mother for almost a year. He is a very good man, and I am very grateful to have him. Recently my mother has been taking all of this out on our baby. She has been taking him from us but not taking care of his basic needs such as changing his diaper or feeding him. I do not expect my mother to do all that but is she takes him from us herself at least take care of his needs. Today my dad went all out on me and told me that his parents will make me ''suck them off'' and I will come back to them crying that they legally toke my baby from me. I still have one month to deal with this. My husband's parents have been nothing but kind to me his mother sent me lots of pretty clothes and they are trying to come here to visit them and have a family meetup they cannot wait to finally meet us and see their grandbaby for the first time.
Oh and I tried to say no to her once. I was holding my baby and he was crying because he was sleepy my mother sprinted in our room and demanded that I give him to her and I said no, long story short she called me a dicksucking bitch and with brute force tore him out of my hands and slapped me. He was crying to much he couldn't breathe. And toke him from me, so since then I gave up and just let her take him.
when she has him she toke good care of him just disregarding my existence and my husband's. But now that we are leaving she is completely neglecting him and I have been following her around nonstop to make sure his needs are being met.
He is a very happy baby nonstop smiling and laughing he has no idea what is happening which is great but my husband and I are in complete pieces.
I really need some advice on how to deal with this for another month and also on how I should handle them. Moving out is not an option because where I live rent is truly unaffordable and we would not have enough to move. Business funds and spending funds are separate and cannot be touched for many reasons.

I have been talking with a girl in my college for 2 years and we both had a deep crush on each other, however this year(our graduation year), she started acting suddenly very distant, that was after I gave her a birthday gift (which I did Because she also gave me one on my birthday, so I just reciprocated the interest). Now she acts like she doesn't even acknowledge my existence.
I tried my best to get to know what happened and 'fix things' , but she always turned me down replying with one sentence. I know something may have happened that changed her mind or she 'got bored', and I respect her decisions although what she did is rude and she hurt me a little bit (we were literally couples but unofficially, and we both knew that. The circumstances we live in just didn't allow it to be official).
Long story short, the graduation day is not far away, and now that we don't talk to each other anymore, I don't want to end the year in the situation we are within because I know deep down we both still have little feelings for each other, and her existence had a positive effect on my life although she hurt me. And I'm sure I'll give her a show she will enjoy of what she have missed out on based on what kind of man I'll be in the next 5 years
(not to be cocky, but I'm putting in the work and I'm always trying to become better. She actually has been seeing that since day 1, she even acknowledged it subtly several times,)
So I'm planning on telling her that it was a pleasure to know her and wish her best in her life. Just that. But I'm not sure if it's a good idea, will that make me seem needy or something as now we haven't been talking for so long then suddenly I say those two sentences? Or is it a good idea?
Any suggestions or opinions would be really appreciated. Thanks in advance for reading my post.

I have been talking with a girl in my college for 2 years and we both had a deep crush on each other, however this year(our graduation year), she started acting suddenly very distant, that was after I gave her a birthday gift (which I did Because she also gave me one on my birthday, so I just reciprocated the interest). Now she acts like she doesn't even acknowledge my existence.
I tried my best to get to know what happened and 'fix things' , but she always turned me down replying with one sentence. I know something may have happened that changed her mind or she 'got bored', and I respect her decisions although what she did is rude and she hurt me a little bit (we were literally couples but unofficially, and we both knew that. The circumstances we live in just didn't allow it to be official).
Long story short, the graduation day is not far away, and now that we don't talk to each other anymore, I don't want to end the year in the situation we are within because I know deep down we both still have little feelings for each other, and her existence had a positive effect on my life although she hurt me. And I'm sure I'll give her a show she will enjoy of what she have missed out on based on what kind of man I'll be in the next 5 years
(not to be cocky, but I'm putting in the work and I'm always trying to become better. She actually has been seeing that since day 1, she even acknowledged it subtly several times,)
So I'm planning on telling her that it was a pleasure to know her and wish her best in her life. Just that. But I'm not sure if it's a good idea, will that make me seem needy or something as now we haven't been talking for so long then suddenly I say those two sentences? Or is it a good idea?
Any suggestions or opinions would be really appreciated. Thanks in advance for reading my post.

Hi,
I'm Daniel from Spain, and I'll be turning 15 this month. With my birthday coming up, I've been thinking a lot about my future. Like many others my age, I don't really have any clear ideas about what I want to be when I grow up, and I know very little about financial matters. For example, I'm unsure about things like banks, credit cards, interest, rent, and managing money.
In school, I'm taking a course called "Informatik" (Computer Science). I'm interested in it, but I'm not sure if I'm creative enough to pursue a career in this field. I also play football as a hobby, but I don't think it’s a viable career path for me.
I moved to Germany in Mönchengladnach three years ago and have learned the language quite well. I'm currently attending a Realschule, and if everything goes well, I have two more years to go. I know I need to decide what kind of place I want to study at next, but I’m not sure about my options and what they involve.
My main goal is to have a stable life. I don’t aspire to be a millionaire, but I definitely don't want to end up homeless. This is why I need to understand financial matters better. My parents say that many parents expect their children to start living independently once they turn 18. I want to be prepared for that.
My parents, who are from Africa, didn't have the same educational opportunities that I have. I don’t want to work extremely long hours just to make ends meet. I also don’t plan to have a partner right now, as I’ve heard that can be expensive.
So, if anyone reads this, could you please give me some tips on choosing a career and managing finances effectively? I’d really appreciate any advice.
Thank you,
Daniel