Brada upright freezer complaints

My cat Winston
Today I realized that my biggest issue with my mom is that she doesn't listen. I've never gotten along with my mom, and at this point, I do not care enough to try and mend our relationship. 'Small' issues and arguments with my mom make me absolutely livid.
Yesterday, I washed my sheets and blankets and they were still very damp even though they went through the dryer three times, and noticed that our dryer says it needs to have it's vent cleared. I thought this would be an easy thing to fix. So I told my mom that the dryer should be looked at, or if we can fix it ourselves, that would be better. My mom completely dismissed my complaint and said she didn't have any problems with the dryer. This morning, I did a load of laundry, and mom noticed and she told me to split it into two loads so the dryer could actually dry my clothes. I was like, 'alright,' even thought that doesn't fix the main issue. I told her she should still get the vent cleared. As I was putting my clothes in the washer, I hit my head against the wall somehow, and my mom asked me if I was okay. I was already mad at her because she was dismissing a problem that affects our entire family, and I told her to shut the fuck up. I know I shouldn't have said that, and I was in the wrong for that. Understandably so, my mom got mad at me for saying that, but she told me she wouldn't fix the dryer. My mom won't listen to any issue unless it's said in a 'nice' way.
A few months ago, my mom started taking our measuring cups and using the tablespoon to measure her coffee grounds. She wouldn't even rinse it out, and just put it back as if it were clean. I told her to please stop doing this, and she told me I wasn't being 'nice' about it so she wouldn't. I have no idea how I was voicing a complaint 'wrong' but okay. I ended up buying another measuring cup set, and I didn't want her to touch it at all. I told her this, and somehow, that was a 'nice' way to tell her to stop. I was specifically trying to tell her that I was so mad at her for not changing that I had to deal with it myself, but oh kay. She currently uses both sets of measuring cups for her coffee grounds, and I have given up.
3 or 4 years ago, my mom used to put bread in the freezer to keep it fresh longer. No one in my family liked this because we're a family of 6, we'll eat the bread. I told my mom that the bread gets soggy when it's thawing, and it was just more inconvenient to have the bread in the freezer. Of course, she didn't listen, so I sent her a lengthy text message about how I didn't want the bread in the freezer. Apparently, it was too mean, and if I was "freaking out," then she didn't want to help me. She is so frustrating to deal with, I don't think she understood she was genuinely being unreasonable. My mom only stopped putting bread in the freezer once every person in my family complained to her.
My family usually eats dinner at 5pm, sometimes earlier. My mom usually makes dinner, so she gets to pick what time we eat, and no one in my family likes eating this early except her. When my dad makes food, we eat at about 7pm, which is a far more reasonable time. Anytime we complain about eating so early, my mom just says, "Well, I was hungry. If you want to eat later, you can." It's so frustrating. And if we get irritated at her for having an event we didn't know about, she just tells us to look at the calendar. No one is looking at the calendar, and only she uses it. I guess we could read the calendar, but she could also just tell us when we have something.
My mom has had similar arguments with the rest of my family, so I know it's not just me. I know I argue with her more than than anyone else in my family, but we all have similar issues with her. She once signed up my sisters for a reading at mass and didn't tell them about it, and my youngest sister was pissed. My sister said she didn't want to do it and tried to tell my mom that it wasn't okay to sign her up for something she didn't want to do and wasn't told about, and my mom was completely dismissive about it. She completely refuses to accept she did something wrong. I don't apologize to her because she never does, maybe I'm really petty, but at this point, I do not care. About a year ago, my parents had a very large argument and almost got divorced (honestly, I wish they would, but they decided they never will :/), and my dad was telling me about how my mom thinks she never did anything wrong. Sigh.
These are just incidents, but I think they do show how my mom doesn't listen to me, or other people. I understand that I am part of the reason why our relationship sucks. I get that, I know relationships are a two way thing, but I feel like I'm trying harder to communicate my issues, and she just isn't listening.
Also, when I was younger, I was confused as to why other people got along with their mom. I went to Mother's Day mass with my mom and her sister's family when I was 6 or 7, and I noticed that my cousin hugged my aunt, and I was so confused on why someone would willingly hug their mother. My mom used to say that I yelled at her a lot, so one time I sent her the definition of yell to prove to her that I don't, and she got irritated at me for that. When my mom found out I'm not religious, she cried, and I think she still denies it because she still tells me to pray, and makes me go to mass occasionally. I used to make rubber band bracelets, and I gave one to my mom, and my sister also made one for her. I asked my mom where she got the other rubber band bracelet, because I was genuinely curious, and my mom told me she didn't know. My sister told me she made it, and my mom told me that she only said she didn't know because she didn't want me to be mad. Seriously, she thinks that little of me? Why would I be mad at her for wearing a bracelet my sister made for her? Both of my parents have made comments about me stealing money before, and it hurts my feelings because I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't steal, please don't think that poorly of me. Also, I'm trans and my mom completely refuses to use my name and correct pronouns. Only my friends and siblings are good about it. Anytime I argue with my mom, I think, "I fucking hate that goddamn woman," but I don't know if that's true. We're fine most of the time, but the second I get irritated at her, I immediately think about how we argue and how I'm mad at her. I don't do this with anyone else, and I almost never argue with anyone except her. Anyway, I've never gotten along with my mom and I don't think it will ever change. But hey, I'm 16, so I don't have many more years of living with her.
Thanks for reading, I hope you have a better than alright day or night!

I'll start with a summary of my post. I currently have a Vango Banshee 200, which I use for cycle touring during relatively nice weather in the UK. However, it has a number of issues that are probably specific to a person of my height, 6ft4in (193cm), and which I now think of every time I camp.
So, I am enviously eyeing up alternatives - such as the Vango Nova 200 (or the identical Scafell 200), or the Vango F10 Xenon UL 2). I would be ok with spending £200 - and perhaps up to £350 if I really felt happy! But I am not sure if the other options will help.
So, I would love to hear your opinions on my thought process here! Will a new tent solve my problems? (I'm looking at products available in the UK, but I'm very open to global perspectives!).
Here goes. I bought my Banshee 200 because it was:

• Big enough
• Well reviewed
• Inexpensive
• Relatively light and packable in a bike pannier.

As a complete novice, these qualities were enough to secure the deal. (The alternative was descending into weeks of choice paralysis, and then not doing any bike touring. I’m glad that I didn’t choose that option).
Now that I've spent many nights in it, I can see the Banshee 200 has some important limitations. For example:

• There isn’t really enough space to sit upright. I didn’t think of this as a problem, because I didn’t plan to spend much time sitting in it. (The long northern nights mean that you’ve got daylight up ’til 9PM in the nicer months. Plus, if it’s dark, I would go to the pub).
• There isn’t a lot of vestibule space. Again, not a problem, because I didn’t plan to use it much.
• It’s really only big enough for one person (if that person is very tall, like I am). That was ok, because I didn’t particularly plan on riding with anyone.

I knew about these when I first bought the tent, but they weren't deal-breakers. Indeed - I’ve done plenty of trips in the Banshee, and it’s been a great friend to me! It’s been a cozy refuge during yellow wind and rain warnings, and an easy piece of gear to pack for calm summer rides. I’ve got no real complaints with the product.
However! I’ve resumed my camping for this year, and the limitations of the Banshee 200 are more obvious to me than ever. Specifically:

• Sometimes I want to just hang out in the tent. In bad weather, especially, but even after dark when I don’t have other schemes. So, I would love to be able to sit up properly while under cover.
• The geometry of the tent means that there is no easy sleeping position. Even when I lay my mat diagonally, I can feel the cloth of the tent gently dusting my forehead, and pushing back against my toes.
• Changing clothes in any way is really hard in a space this small.
• I’m not the most organised person. I’d love to have a bit more space to organize my gear, store my panniers, and generally feel “at home” - even it’s just for a few nights.
• I’d like to do more long trips this year. One night in a teeny tent is ok. But more than 5 gets a bit frustrating.
• It would be nice to imagine that one day I might sleep in a tent with one other person (lol).

Now that I know what I want, the alternative options are intoxicatingly exciting. In particular, the geometry of tunnel tents with two "high" arches look like they would be a big help with tall person shapes. Their footprints aren’t necessarily much bigger than the Banshee. But - with vertical (or near-vertical) walls, the footprint would surely be much more usable (unless I am mistaken there).
Some examples include:
Alpkit Visa 2 - nice price at £160, but actually larger than I need, and perhaps a bit heavy
Vango Scafell 200 or the identical Nova 200 - around £175 - good price, and I feel like Vango are reassuringly predictable
Terra Nova Halcyon 2 currently on sale at £200
Vango F10 Xenon UL 2 - around £340 - I could justify this expensive for a tent that I could really enjoy. I’m excited by the weight of this tent. And the size of the pockets!
Terra Nova starlight 2 - currently on sale at £553, outside my range and possibly too low anyway. (See also the Blizzard 2 at £460. or Hoolie compact 2 at £280).
Nordisk Holland 2 LW - discounted here at £645 - out of my range, but bloody hell it’s light
Hilleberg Nallo 2 - £960 - this is way outside my range but you've got to have a dream (otherwise, how you gonna have a dream come true?).
So, there's some possibilities. Would these tents help with my problems? Or will I be just as sleepless and disorganized? I am especially interested in hearing:

• Tall person experiences (I am very tired of hearing “if you’re up to 6 foot, there's lots of space!” in reviews)
• First-hand experiences of any of the products listed here (or referrals to useful reviews)
• Suggestions of other tent geometries to look into
• Other tent manufacturers with something affordable
• Ways to “test” tents ahead of buying them (is that even possible?)
• General advice on how to live my life

Many thanks in advance for your help! I will confess that I haven't thoroughly searched the subreddit for similar posts (I will do that now). Maybe you can tell, but I'm grateful for the chance to get my muddled hyperfocussed thoughts in order.

Upright freezer. Three years old and it quits cooling. Had to scramble to find freezer space to save what we could. I suppose I’ll pay someone to take a look at it.

Hi, I'm new here, been lurking for about a month and haven't gone to any meetings but have found comfort in this group. Strangely it makes me feel better knowing my position is not unique and neither is my Q. Things have broken down and I find myself awake at 2 AM with no one real to talk with, so I thought getting feelings out on (digital) paper might be therapeutic.
My wife (F36) and I (M31) have been married for 4 years. Two beautiful little girls together who have me absolutely wrapped around their fingers. Both of us are pretty successful in our careers. Not rich by any means, but she's got 2 bachelors degrees and a masters, I've got a successful public service career so far. Everything looks great from the outside.
My wife, we'll call her L, has had a problem with alcohol for a while. At least a year and a half, which is such a short amount of time compared to some of y'all, which makes me feel even more absurd about my situation. The past 18 months, her daily routine has been to come home from work, pour a glass (lol more like 3) of wine, and drink wine constantly until she decided to sleep. Typically she'd fall asleep in a chair or on a couch, sometimes with a plate of food still on her lap. Keep in mind, she almost never eats during the day, so this is mostly all on an empty stomach. Also, she's prescribed Ambien Xanax, which is a whole other thing. I'd made comments here and there, telling her how nice it'd be for her not to drink for a night or two. I used to genuinely enjoy her as a person. Of course she never remembers these conversations because she's fucked up on Ambien and wine. Sex was almost non-existent because honestly it was hard for me to find her attractive when she could barely keep her eyes open and smelled like a dive bar floor. There are other issues she's caused with her drinking in the past, but those are neither here nor there. All of them form a pattern that is unhealthy at best and disastrous at worse.
About a month ago, things came to a head. She made a series of mistakes at work (did I mention she works in addiction medicine? lol) which resulted in her losing her job, threatening my career, and she is still potentially facing criminal charges. I won't go too much into detail about what happened. The day that happened, I told her she needs to leave and go stay at her parents' house. She did. Part of that was for me and my daughters to have space from her so I could make decisions, part of it was out of anger, and part of it was because I selfishly wanted to distance myself from her for work reasons. I kept the girls, my parents (my rock) helped me out for a bit while I was working, and I let the girls stay in her parents' house with them for a bit. I went over there and laid out simple expectations: no more alcohol, go to therapy, try to wean off of Ambien and Xanax. Those were my expectations, and she agreed to them. She then blamed me for her drinking: I'm too distant from her, I'm too mean to her, I'm too healthy, I put too much pressure on her, I'm too successful, I'm not attracted to her, etc. I heard all of those as excuses for her drinking (and called her on that).While she was gone I got rid of all the alcohol in the house. I don't drink for health reasons, so this wasn't an issue for me.
She comes home after a week of staying at her parents' house. A few days later, I find an almost empty bottle of vodka in the fridge. I absolutely hate vodka and have never known her to drink it, at least at home, so I brush it off and justify it by saying maybe someone brought it over a long time ago and I just forgot about it (lol). I toss it in the trash.
The next day, I find another 2 bottles in the freezer, one full and one half gone. When I find it, I'm literally in the process of leaving for work so I just dump them, toss them in the trash and bounce. I'll deal with that later. That same night, when I get home, she's already passed out on the couch. I look in the freezer and surprise! another half drunk bottle of vodka. The next morning, I tell her once again I want her to leave the house and I tell her why. Her response was "You told me you didn't want me to drink wine, so I got a bottle of vodka. It's refreshing and nice to drink outside." I just relented because I honestly couldn't believe what I was hearing. She once again promised "If that's what you want, I swear I won't drink anymore alcohol. That'll be easy for me."
Cut to the very next day, the night before our wedding anniversary. I've made it a habit to surreptitiously taste her "water" or "gatorade" when I have the chance. Mostly to confirm my own suspicions and whether my gut is correct or not (spoiler alert: it's right most of the time). I taste it, dump it, go to sleep (she's of course passed out on the couch). The next morning, the day of our anniversary (and Mother's day weekend) when I confronted her about it, she looks me dead in the eyes and lies to me about it. I call her on her bullshit and after about 5 minutes she relents and admits and apologizes. Once again she promises blah blah blah. I tell her very frankly: we have family plans this weekend. I will go with you to keep up appearances but I just want you to know, I am pretending.
Honestly the weekend goes pretty well, I don't have many complaints. But I go back to work and she's back at home jobless and with the girls, it picks right back up. I taste vodka in one of her drinks, confront her about it, she lies, etc. Last night she's passed out super early on the couch, so I taste the water bottle she's been guarding all night and it's LOADED with vodka and liquid IV. I search her car and find an empty bottle and search her bag and find an empty bottle. I leave the car bottle on her driver's seat. She wakes up as I'm going to bed and I tell her "I don't want to talk about it anymore." She says "talk about what?" and I say "You know what." Today we didn't speak to each other at all before I left for work. At about 9PM, her mom texted me at work and said basically "We went over to bring her food and she was a blubbering mess. We took her and the girls to our house to take care of them." Of course, I look in the trash can and there's another liquid IV/vodka. Also of course, her mother has no idea what happened today, nor do I. Was she overcome by shame? Did she pass out on the couch with the girls in the house? Did she get angry with them and hurt them? No way to know.
So, here I sit. I've been contemplating divorce for a while, but it feels unfair to only really give her a month to fix this problem. At the same time, she has taken exactly zero steps to fix the problem and has actually made it worse. The alcoholism is one problem, the lying is an entirely different problem I'm not willing to overlook. I know it's easy to say the lying is a result of the alcoholism, but the trust I once had in this relationship is absolutely shattered. It's gone. Which makes things easier for me because I can stop expecting anything different, but it also means I have decisions to make regarding my daughters' future with her.
I am at work from 1pm to 10pm every day and I'm absolutely terrified about what happens when I'm not here. As a matter of fact, now that I'm typing this, the solution seems simple. It's genuinely a safety issue for my daughters. I don't trust her with them. I don't trust her not to pass out when they're playing outside. I don't trust her not to let them accidentally drink her vodka Gatorade. I don't trust her not to get in a DUI crash with them in the car. The answer is so blindingly obvious. She's showing me who she really is and, to this point, has not made any steps to change it. Part of me is hoping she'll just stay at her parents' house until she finds a job and can afford an apartment. Part of me is hoping she'll text me tomorrow and says she's going inpatient. Part of me hopes I wake up tomorrow and this will all just be a funny dream. Part of me hopes I don't wake up tomorrow. I won't do it myself simply because I refuse to leave my daughters behind. This shit hurts, though, and therapy as well as peer counseling from work have been pretty helpful on that front.

I had him for three days today, I found him with a hurt wing and have been caring for him since, he really had a personality lol would also like to stay on my hand being pretty content there, mad the mistake of naming him lol his name was Terry
somehow he got stuck to my windowsill and lost a leg, he was okay for a second gave him suger water but he started to panic and wouldn't stay upright he kept going on his back so I put him in a container and in the freezer :(

As stated in previous post, an investigator showed up at my house on Monday while we were not there.
Tuesday and Wednesday I went through and made sure my fire extinguishers were still charged and in date and made sure my smoke detector batteries were still good. Didn’t need to clean my house since it wasn’t dirty. Tidied up the kids’ rooms some since they’re pigs lol. Went to work Thursday (working Thursday-Sunday on day shift this week) worried sick my wife would have to deal with the investigator my herself. Never showed.
She ended up showing up yesterday afternoon around 2pm. My wife immediately called me cussing that the dhs lady was there. She put me on speaker and let her in. I heard her say our house looks nice and clean, but immediately began accusing my wife of being on drugs other than what she’s prescribed (meth and fentanyl were mentioned explicitly). Wife has some health issues we’re in the process of sorting out that’s causing her to lose weight, so she’s a little thinner than she needs to be for her stature.
She checked to make sure we had lights and running water in bedrooms and bathrooms and immediately said my wife needed to take a drug test right this second. Wife showed her letters from psychiatrist and therapist that stated there was no suspicion of medication abuse and she had never asked for early refills, and sometimes even skipped refills. She peed, cup showed zero drugs other than what’s prescribed. Lady’s tune changed real fast. She apologized profusely for making assumptions, because the report that was made said my wife laid around the house like a zombie and didn’t do anything for the kids when left alone with them. She also spoke to our kids together and separately. They answered well.
She went on to check the fridges and freezer and pantry to ensure we had food and then began asking for mine and the kids personal info (full name, dob, ssn, etc). Then she proceeded to ask about medical history, citing that another part of the complaint was medical neglect. That tipped us off to efectos who called, even though we already had a good idea.
They were told we were informed my daughter had severe hip dysplasia at birth and that we had refused corrective surgery. We provided documentation that showed we were informed and told that it was extremely minor and should clear up as she ages. Then we provided proof of when we discovered it had not gone away, x-rays, mri and surgical consult dates, and her tune changed again.
Then she asked about my son’s school attendance. We changed schools mid year, but the old school kept reporting him absent, even after providing all necessary documentation to the new school. She started saying she could take our kids because my son had missed 90+ consecutive days of school. We had to provide documentation of the move, start day, etc. she apologized again for being a little rude about it.
She wraps things up and says this seems like an open and shut case, pending further investigation into the medical stuff and talking to some references we gave her, and that we’d receive a letter within 45 days informing if the case was closed or if we’d receive a case worker if they find we medically neglected my daughter.
Apologies for formatting, I’m on mobile and my app is freezing typing out this long post.

My freezer is not cold enough. It is normally set at -17°C but a few days ago the display is showing -5°C and it is not returning to the set temperature. I have a thermometer inside and reading is in agreement to the freezer display.
I looked behind the freezer and the only thing that looks out of the ordinary is the copper lines going to the compressor have some green and white residue powder on it.l and some condensation
I removed the inside shroud and found the evaporator coils to have frost only on the top few rows. The bottom rows have no frost. The fan is also working.
I am suspecting I have a refrigerant leak. Can anybody provide some insight from personal experience?
If it is refrigerant leaking is it worth fixing or should I buy a new freezer. Thanks in advance.

Blake was listening to his sister through his headphones while she ripped into him about his hopeless addiction to pornography. He rolled his eyes as she went on and on about his sexist attitudes and his distorted views on women and sex. If his sister had only known that he was scrolling through explicitly drawn versions of Marge Simpson and Lois Griffin in various poses with various props, she would have hung up the phone and given up.
As far as Blake was concerned there were no distortions in his mind about women. He had lived through so many interactions and had seen so many videos of women being terrible people that it only reinforced his bias.
Porn didn’t judge Blake. Porn didn’t make Blake do things that he didn’t want to do. He spent time with women the way he wanted to. If he wanted a woman to act a certain way, he could find a video where she did just that.
The way he saw it, women wanted a lot, and if they didn’t get what they wanted, they made everyone’s life hell until they did. Conversely, if a man wanted something, it was tough luck. He watched his mother treat his father like that until the day he died, overworked and unhappy.
Less than a year after his mother put his father in the ground, she was with someone else that she was all too happy to control. Porn gave Blake the control, and he liked it.
“Blake, I love you, but you’re going to waste your whole life in front of a screen holding your dick.”
“Don’t you have another kid that you should be working on squirting out?”
She hung up.

Blake was caught watching videos at work again, but this time he had a plan. He knew eventually that he would be caught, but after losing three jobs for the very same reason, he hatched a simple way of ensuring that he wouldn’t lose out on any money, and be able to stick it to the boss and company he hated for no other reason than employing him.
Blake was called into his manager’s office, but before anything could be said, Blake blurted out that he needed to take mental leave. He sobbed in front of his manager while he said that the job was giving him thoughts of hopelessness and self harm, but he was smiling on the inside. He was talking just loud enough for a few people outside of the office to hear him.
His manager's face was red.
“Cornered you, bitch.” Blake thought to himself. “Good luck firing someone who’s crying out for mental help.”
Blake figured that he’d be able to stretch this out for at least a month. A month of paid time off doing what he loved.

“It’s my phone!” he muttered to himself as he rode the elevator down to his new found freedom. “If people have a problem with the things I’m looking at, perhaps they shouldn’t be looking over my shoulder and mind their own fucking business.”
He didn’t mind the other people in the elevator, or their awkward expressions. They didn’t matter to him. No one really did.

Still on a high from manipulating his boss into a corner, Blake decided to do something new on the bus ride to his apartment building. He clicked on a video. He wasn’t exactly watching the video, rather he was watching people’s reactions out of the corners of his eyes.
He kept the volume low, but up just enough so the moaning could be heard.
At first, people around him were wondering if they were actually hearing what they thought they were hearing.
He was trying not to laugh at their reactions. People began to move to other seats, and soon enough, everyone was giving him disgusted looks.
“Fuck em.” he whispered.
He noticed one man sitting in the back of the bus who was giving him quite a different look than everyone else. The man was well dressed. Perfect hair. Perfect teeth.
He was smiling at Blake.
Blake, a self admitted and overly enthusiastic homophobe, turned off the video. He began to worry that he had attracted the wrong kind of attention.

Blake was all too eager to get out of the bus and hurry towards the doors to his building. He heard a voice behind him that caused him to catch a breath and lose his forward progress. He turned around. It was the beautiful man from the back of the bus.
“Excuse me! I’d like to have a word!”
Blake found his voice hypnotic, and his stride was elegant, almost like he was floating just above the cracked and cruddy sidewalk.
“I uh… couldn’t help but notice what you were doing on the bus young man. I think I have something you might be interested in.”
Blake was lost in that voice. He had never been attracted to another man, but he was feeling things inside himself that he’d never felt before, and he hated himself for it. After a long awkward silence, Blake finally found his voice.
“Look buddy, take your pixy dust and bother someone else. You’re not my type.”
“Oh, you’re definitely my type.” The beautiful man laughed and handed him a plain white business card with nothing but a web address on it. “In so many different ways, you’re exactly my type.”
“What is this?”
“It’s my business, Kid. You want videos you can’t tear yourself away from? Trust me. It’s the newest thing.”
He winked at Blake and walked away.
-
Blake was staring at his screen while he was riding in the elevator. There was a paywall. A dollar for the first month, then a hundred dollars a month after that.
No screenshots or thumbnails, just a form for a credit card. As the doors opened to his floor, he put his phone in his pocket and decided against any further investigation. He was sure that it was a scam of some kind.

Until ten o’clock that night, Blake engaged in his normal activities with one new addition he had begun almost two weeks prior. He built two shelves in front of two different air vents in his apartment, and he had placed speakers on the shelves. The tenants in his building got to experience all of the auditory pleasures of the thrusting and jiggling and smacking that he was watching.
Blake made sure he followed the rules, and nothing came out of those speakers after ten p.m., but it was fair game until that time.
He would laugh to himself thinking about the tenants having to listen. He wasn’t sure how far the sound traveled through the vents, but he figured that most people on his floor were getting a good chunk of it.
That night though, his usual joyful time in front of his phone, his 70 inch television, and his newly discovered fondness for Cerave was marred by the thought of something unique and dangerous out there that he hadn’t seen.
After several attempts at a satisfactory denouement in his masturbatory madness, Blake finally gave up, raised the white flag on its limp post, and went to bed.

Blake kept hearing the man’s siren-like voice in his head while he tried to sleep. After almost two hours of tossing and turning, he sat up and snatched his phone from the charger and typed his credit card information into the mysterious site. He just had to know.
The site opened up and he was instantly intrigued. There were no thumbnails on any of the videos, but the descriptions on each of them were so graphic, profane, and dehumanizing that it would do us all a great service if they were not repeated here. Blake’s favorite appendage however, jumped to a zealous attention at the graphic depictions that the perverse descriptions painted within his brain.
Blake stripped off his briefs and sat down on the edge of his bed. His left hand gripped the phone while his right hand eagerly gripped something else.
He clicked on the first video and it began to load.
Blake waited.
And waited.
And waited.
The video wasn’t loading, so Blake decided to try another one, only to find that his left thumb wouldn’t move. He realized that his entire body was stiff. Nothing would move with the exception of his eyes. He couldn’t even speak.
All he could do was stare at the glowing screen in the darkness of his apartment.
After a moment, his mind started to race while his body remained ridiculously rigid.

Three hours had passed. Blake had been able to see every minute tick by. He had watched his battery meter slowly run down to eighty percent. He had thought that his screen would eventually turn off, but it never did. It was still trying to load the video.
Something was tickling his nose and his face itched. His back had begun to ache and he felt some tiny pin pricks along his still turgid tool. He wanted to cry, but nothing would come. In fact, his eyes had begun to dry because he had not been able to blink.
Blake watched another hour go by before his body finally succumbed to exhaustion and fell into a deep sleep, in spite of the fact that he could not close his eyes.

He awoke six hours later and his vision was partially obscured. Still holding his phone and his phallus, Blake tried to scream. The sun was now coming through the window of his apartment. He could see his reflection in the mirror that was on the opposite wall. His hair was long, and it was white. A spotty and wiry beard had exploded out of his face and it hung down to just above his enlarged and sagging nipples set in a sagging and flabby chest.
His breaths were shorty and ragged; phlegm was gurgling with each inspiration.
His arms and legs were covered in large liver spots and all of his skin was a purple paper thin.
He was old.
The shock of seeing his hunched and rigid reflection had staved off the feeling of pain from his nether regions for only a moment. His fingernails were growing on his hands. Some of the yellow things were curling around his phone while the others were curling and jabbing into what now looked like a deflated balloon stretched too thin, that was desperately trying to retreat into his abdomen against his rigid grip.
The battery on his phone was blinking.
It was about to die. He wondered what happened when the battery ran out, but somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew exactly what would happen when that loading screen finally went dark.
His sister’s words were all he could think about as the screen and the world went dark.

After several nights of peace, Blake’s neighbors noticed an awful smell emanating from the air vents. After several complaints, the building’s Super opened Blake’s apartment and found the withered, still rigid frame of a dead old man sitting upright on the edge of the bed.
After taking several photos that he would post later on social media and stealthily absconding with almost a full bottle of Cerave, the Super called the authorities.

So this Frigidaire, about 6, 7 years old, started to dripping water from the condensation pipe insulation wrap. I suspect it is caused by the misshape of the insulation wrap/hvac tape where it enters the bottom of the freezer , and the water condensed their followed the gravity to the other end of the insulation wrap and dripping there. It drips about 1~2 cups every 24 hours.
I pulled down havc tape/insulation wrap at the entry point to the bottom of the freezer and can see black mildew/mold around the the plastic pipe which stick out of the freezer, and from where the condensation pipe enters the freezer. The condensation pipe is not frozen up, just the water from above.
There is no water in the dripping pan, it is bone dry.
Does that mean, as long as I redo the entry point with good foam, insulation and hvac tape, I should be able to solve the dripping issue?
Model is fffu14f2qw.
Thanks.

Age: 36
Sex: Female
Height: 5’5”
Weight: 145
Race: White
Duration of complaint: 3 months
Location: Tennessee
Any existing relevant medical issues: none
I do not smoke or have a history of smoking.
I drink 2 alcoholic drinks twice per week.
Current medications: pre natal vitamins, folic acid 1 mg per day
I have had a strange pain in my back right abdomen for about 3 months. It is not back pain, and feels like it could be some kind of inflamed organ.
When I try pushing on it from the front, it doesn’t feel like I can reach that spot since it’s more in the back, but when I push on it from the back, my ribs are in the way.
I notice it in the morning when I wake up from sleeping all night ( doesn’t matter if I sleep on my back or sides). It is painful for about an hour each morning after waking, then goes away during the day while I am upright and walking around. It started 3 months ago and was a 7/10 pain then and now it is more like 5/10 pain. Anyone know what this might be or have experience with something like this? Thank you!

Hi I wanna ask you about this PSU be quiet! STRAIGHT POWER 12 Platinum 1500W. I have it Fractal design 860w ion+ platinum but sudden my pc start shutdown in idle(office work) / heavy(gaming/streaming) load and after shut down it do it some random restart about 2-3 times... Than start again. Sometimes Motherboard reset and must F1 to bios ahhh... And lastly, my computer was completely turned off during classic office work (idle load). And he didn't want to run at all. I took a PSU test from a former Seasonic. And he disconnected the power source and connected it only to the 24-pin ATX cable, but nothing happened. But it must have tripped the fuse in the distribution box. After that, we left it out of the drawer for about 2 hours, and a miracle happened. But now he is under complaint and I don't trust him very much. And that's why I want to ask if you have any experience with this source and if it's a good buy.
My specs of my computer is
-MB: Asus ROG STRIX X670E-E GAMING WIFI -CPU: Ryzen 7900X -GPU: RTX 3070 -AOI: Arctic liquid freezer II 420 -Drives: 4x Sata disk - 2x HDD 7.2k + 2x SSD 2,5", Nvme drive - 4x nvme (1TB and other 2TB each)

• funs :) which are connect to HUB.

So thanks for advice if new choice is good idea purchase or not. I now wait for RMA which is 30 days in my country ahhh so I hope it will be okay but I dont wanna going back to the old Fractal 860W PSU ahhh
For info I got some coil whine on MB about CPU area using old one PSU I hope new solve this ahhh
Also I add I have available purchase some of these PSU too but be quiet look for me little more intersting ahhh Other which is available in my country too. I chose Be quiest because have now better price than other ahhh :D

1. MSI MEG Ai1300P PCIE5
2. FSP Fortron Hydro G PRO ATX3.0(PCIe5.0) 1000W
3. Seasonic Prime GX-1300 Gold
4. Seasonic Prime PX-1300 Platinum

Hi all, a family member has a Crosley upright freezer that sometimes has a malfunctioning “door ajar” alarm. Every so often I help by chipping ice off the inside of the freezer, then it usually works. It just happened again, and I checked the tiny white switch on the inside of the freezer door that tells the freezer whether the door is open and whether the light should be on, etc. I noticed it does not act accordingly to what is true — for example, the light will be on when the switch is pushed in. I wiped the sides of the switch with a paper towel and it came back with moisture on it. I am dreading the answer which I think is the case, but is this a fire risk?

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Synopsis:
Juliette Contzen is a lazy, good-for-nothing princess. Overshadowed by her siblings, she's left with little to do but nap, read … and occasionally cut the falling raindrops with her sword. Spotted one day by an astonished adventurer, he insists on grading Juliette's swordsmanship, then promptly has a mental breakdown at the result.
Soon after, Juliette is given the news that her kingdom is on the brink of bankruptcy. At threat of being married off, the lazy princess vows to do whatever it takes to maintain her current lifestyle, and taking matters into her own hands, escapes in the middle of the night in order to restore her kingdom's finances.
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Action, Fantasy, Copious Ohohohohos.
Chapter 240: Private Gallery
My, how quaint.
An underground maze.
If it wasn’t dark towers laden with bats, it was underground mazes filled to the brim with all the upholstery recovered from the Summer Solstice Festival’s annual bonfire.
Here beneath a barn utilised as little more than a cellar door, black was still the new black. An unending panorama of dark embroidery and furnishings to match any budding empress’s humble beginnings, ensuring I remained busy offering all the slightly different variations of wrinkling my nose could perform.
The porcelain vases featuring motifs of the wrong season? A mild scrunch. The candelabras burning below 98% of their height instead of being immediately replaced? Hints of a sneeze. The golden silk carpets clearly stolen from the cathedrals of the Holy Church? … A nod of my head.
But what I could have no complaints about was a door still swinging upon its hinges.
Poetry in motion, it painted the picture of a baroness desperate in her haste to stumble over her dress as much as humanly possible. Excellent news. We didn’t need to break another door today.
A surprise.
After all, the baroness seemed intent on breaking everything herself.
Bwoomph.
The sound of a heavy object being dropped came crashing through.
And then another. And another.
A commotion to rival the scuffling of two rival sons at our reception hall. The cadence of chairs, small tables and then backsides falling to the ground as insults became slaps and slaps became a scene of disgrace, all the while my sisters and I watched and snacked on the walnuts.
Sadly for the baroness, I chose not to stand idly by as she roughly squirrelled away her stolen possessions. And neither did Coppelia, who rubbed her hands together in gleeful expectation.
It was still the most innocent gesture she’d ever made.
“Should we let her gather up the loot pile some more?” she asked brightly.
I shook my head at once, my nose aching from the ceaseless wrinkling.
“Absolutely not. Even a moment is too long in this burrow.”
“We could double back and ominously stamp our feet to make her go faster, too.”
“Or we could merely offer our supervision instead. Come. It’s time to end our stay in the countryside. As well as this baroness’s grand misadventure.”
Already dreaming of my bed, I lightly pushed the door open.
A moment later, I was met by the sight of an adventurer’s most wanton dream come to life.
Within the centre of a bedroom chamber, chests laden with silver and gold crowns sat waiting for the first lout to claim as hardship expenses for chasing cats in an endless circle. The chests gleamed with an organised lustre, winking in unison as though counted and arranged to the coin.
It was a sight which contrasted with the desperate movements of the baroness.
Only brief snippets of her could be seen as she went to-and-fro in another room, accessed through a parted bookcase. Through the opening, I heard hints of calamity. Heavy banging as objects crashed to the floor, joined by the sound of ragged breathing to match a servant dashing up and down my bedroom tower to fetch grapes for me in quantities of one.
“Haah … haahh … hahhh …”
And now my curiosity was kindled.
Things worth more than chests of crowns. What could she possess, I wonder?
Sweeping past the gleaming pile of silver and gold, I made my way towards the parted bookcase, and then peeked through to see our baroness performing one last act of defiance.
With her golden hair as dishevelled as her dress, she was kneeling beside an assembled pile of what were unmistakably paintings. A veritable mountain of them, all framed in gilded brass. The scent of oil, watercolours and various pigments struck me more than any whiff of alcohol I’d experienced today.
Clearly a gallery of sorts. A secondary trove of treasure, but no less valuable. Rare paintings were worth their weight in silver and gold as much as any of the coins gathered in the chamber.
And also, to my horror, much easier to destroy.
“Haah … haahhh … hahhhhh …”
The baroness didn’t even notice our presence.
So absorbed was she in her final act of petulance, her only concern was to raise her feeble arms, weakened by all the disdain it required to gather so many heavy paintings in one spot.
All to set it alight.
With a look of desperation on her face, she raised a single candle, readying to set the oil upon the canvasses ablaze.
“Noooooope~”
“–Aah?!”
The same candle which was promptly plucked from her hand by Coppelia, who required no prompting to stop the destruction of precious treasure.
The baroness jolted in shock at Coppelia’s sudden appearance behind her, and even more so at the playful smile leaning towards her. A heartbeat later, she swiped at the candle, tearing away the topmost half. But it was too late.
The flame had already been extinguished.
“Noo … nooooooooooooo!!”
The baroness cupped her hands around the top, offering a tiny breath as she hoped to ignite it like the fading embers of a hearthfire.
She failed.
I took a step into the hidden gallery, ready to offer the coup de grâce to round off this minor detour into my countryside. A final reminder to my kingdom’s nobility, that whatever their rank, none were too lowly to be ignored.
“Ohhohohohohoho … how pitiable,” I said, my hand barely covering my lips. “Instead of a vain attempt to flee, you choose mindless destruction instead. I suppose I’ve no grounds to fault on this. You were wildly successful. Only that it was your own schemes which came to ruin.”
I gazed at the crumpled heap of the baroness as she turned around.
Her grey eyes widened as she viewed me.
All of a sudden, what colour remained upon her face drained to the point where if she threw herself on her bed, she’d be invisible against the white linen. Her only method of escape remaining.
It certainly wasn’t in the gurgling she made.
“Ah … n-no … wait …”
Her voice petered out, whatever words she spoke fading like a mousy squeak in the distance.
Ugh. The standards I endured.
Despite attempting a final act of spite, she didn’t even have enough vigour left in her to transfer that into the most cursory of insults.
“Now, this right here is what separates the barony from the city nobility,” I said, well and truly exasperated. “You may despise your peers, but know that Lady Tolent and Duke Valence at least performed their roles as expected. They were rude until the end. You’ve a considerable amount to learn.”
With a sigh, I took a step towards the mound of portraits.
Given what I’d seen so far, I doubted if any painting here was worth what the baroness deemed worthy enough to hide away like a dragon’s favoured treasure. But I was open to being pleasantly surprised.
Who knows? Perhaps she’d pilfered more than carpets from the Holy Church.
However–
“Wait!!!!!”
The baroness scrambled to her feet, arms raised as she blocked my path.
Despite her sudden burst of life, no colour returned to her face. It was like a ghoul raised as a puppet, desperately heeding the command of its owner.
“You … You can’t look!” she said, quivering. “None of this … none of this is for you!”
My mouth widened at the gall.
… Why, so she did have some insult left in her!
To insinuate I wasn’t worthy of judging these paintings was far more wounding than any generic disdain she could level against my superior wealth, standing, beauty and shape of my hair!
After all, I was exceptionally confident in my curating skills!
Anything less would see my own works being met by a chorus of snivelling! Amongst all who resided in my kingdom, it wasn’t traitors who were the most fearless to my ire! It was art critics!
“E-Excuse me! Rest assured that I’m more than capable of judging the qualities of any painting! When it comes to my assessment of art, my valuation leaves no detail unturned!”
Somehow, the baroness paled even more. Her eyes quivered like ponds in a gale.
A moment later–
“You can’t!!!!”
She threw herself at me.
A slow, lumbering tackle to match her anaemic state. I stepped to the side as she hurled herself past me, falling to a heap by Renise’s feet.
The maid looked down. She didn’t wear a single hint of animosity. Only pity and sorrow. Truly, she was too kind to ever have been in the nobility. I feared for her current role.
Still, I gave a sigh, before leaning over the mountain of paintings.
“Uwah~ this is a new one.”
As the light from the doorway fell upon it, Coppelia offered a hint of what was to be expected. She wore a peculiar expression, her smile oddly fixed as she gazed down at the nearest one to face upright.
I joined her.
And then–
“Hmm.”
I blinked as I assessed it.
A moment later, I glanced over those nearby. And then those nearby them.
Not only paintings. But portraits.
All featuring the same subject. A girl with long, dark hair and vivid eyes.
Many featured a dress hinting at a summer’s day. Shafts of golden sunlight was a common theme, along with a backdrop of a pristine tea table, laden with a familiar array of confectionery. Carrot madeleines and carrot cakes. The same ones I tactically placed for everyone else to eat at my mandatory tea parties.
Indeed. That made sense.
Since this was assuredly my tea table being presented. And that girl with a pleasant smile, unblemished features, a regal bearing and warmth radiating from her very presence was me.
I dug inside the mountain of portraits, lifting up another at random.
Yes.
It was me. Again.
In fact–
Every single portrait in this heap was of me.
At least a hundred or more. All framed and recently placed upon the walls of a hidden room. A private gallery to a baroness–one who was a keen painter. A corner had been transformed into a small workshop. Unlike the one found in her tavern, this one was far more organised. Easels and brushes were neatly tidied away, cared for as much as the paintings that had been created here.
“Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!”
Ignoring the cry of despair behind me, I gazed at the heap of paintings, hand against my cheek as I considered the sight.
A short hum was all I required.
I turned to the stricken baroness upon the floor, her mouth wide as she waited for my judgement.
And then–
“Oho …”
I began to laugh.
“Ohoho … ohhohohoho …”
But this was no mocking laugh which spilled from my lips.
No … it was a laugh of pure delight.
“Ohhhohohoohhohohoohhohohoo!!”
True, nothing here was fit to be placed upon the Royal Villa’s walls. But few paintings were. This didn’t mean they were without merit. On the contrary, even a surface level impression of my face was worth more crowns than even a mosaic of the Grand Duchess completed by a thousand master painters.
But while better artists than her had painted me, few had painted more.
And this I could use.
Why … with this many paintings, I could fill up Soap Island with my imagery!
I could ensure that every tunnel possessed my permanent smile and watching eyes!
No matter where the soap miners hid, seeking respite from their days of hard labour and repentance, they could be met by the sight of my angelic face reminding them that I know and judge their every moment of unsupervised rest!
How … How wonderful!!!!
“A 7/10,” I declared. “Individually, they range between passable and acceptable. Except this one. There is something wrong with the nose. But when taken as an entire collection, the overall composition is greater than the sum of its parts. Alone, each is a verse describing a princess forced to adhere to her mandatory tea parties even as summer blooms a window away. But together, it is the sonata of a princess who continues in her duties without care to repetition or fatigue, reminding those whose hands falter when they should be mining soap that I do not rest, and so neither will they. Not an overly complex message, but then I wouldn’t wish it to be lost.”
Thus, I clapped my hands together in satisfaction.
“... Indeed, I shall put these portraits to excellent use!”
I waited for the gasp of relief which usually came with any of my scores which didn’t plunge into negative numbers. The baroness would not be destroyed by the world of fine art. Only ignored. The baseline criticism. She’d survive.
Providing, of course, that she ever woke from her stupor.
Looking down, I was appalled to see all the light had vacated her eyes.
Far from offering her gratitude, she lay collapsed in an untidy heap upon the floor, her body prone and motionless, her expression locked in morbid embarrassment, and with no signs of life other than the trail of drool which began to leak from the edge of her lips.
“Wow~” said Coppelia, leaning down to poke her cheeks. “You managed to kill her with just the laugh.”
I was appalled.
If this was the reaction to my satisfaction, I may as well be disappointed! That was always easier!
“C-Coppelia! I didn’t kill her! … Why, anyone who dies looking so slovenly would come back to life just to fix themselves!”
Also kneeling beside the fallen baroness, Renise gently shook the girl’s shoulder. Only a weak gurgling came out, wishing for an eternal night.
After a moment, Renise sent a slightly pained smile towards me.
“Um, by any chance … do you not have any thoughts regarding seeing so many portraits of yourself?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well … do you not find it odd?”
I looked at her in puzzlement.
“... No? Why would that be odd? Isn’t it natural that people would wish to paint me? I’m a princess. And an excellent one, too. Better me than a fruit bowl, surely.”
Renise blinked … just before raising her hand to her lips in a small giggle.
“Yes, I suppose you’re right.”
Words which advanced her on my family’s career ladder exponentially. I nodded profusely.
Mreoow.
At least until an unexpected sound filled the air.
I looked around in puzzlement.
“... Did I hear a cat?”
“Mmh~” Coppelia pointed towards the faux-vault door we’d passed. “More than one. There’s a whole bunch being kept nearby. It smells terrible.”
I threw up my arms in exasperation.
Why, no wonder the baroness sought the bliss of unconsciousness! It was to evade my utter disbelief!
The absolute state of my kingdom’s schemers!
First Trierport! Now Hartzwiese! To think it was an epidemic!
Just what were these people doing?! Truly, it’s one thing to undermine my kingdom. But that was a pale crime compared to their feat of singlehandedly fuelling the existence of the Adventurer’s Guild!
“It must be Tantrum and Peppy,” said Renise, far less aggrieved. “As well as all the others.”
I directed my bewilderment towards her instead.
“What is a … Tantrum and a Peppy?”
“They’re the names of the deputy guildmaster’s cats. The ones she was looking for. We should ensure they’re rescued before the night is done.”
I shook my head rapidly. No, no, no, no.
“I am not rescuing cats.”
“Hm? … Why not? Isn’t that the job of adventurers?”
“No, that’s the job of drunkards who mistake the commissions plastered on walls for requests to save a kidnapped princess. Besides, cats hardly need rescuing. Whatever bonds they find themselves in, they’re more than capable of slipping free by their own endless guile.”
Indeed, our only danger was that we tripped over a lazing cat hidden in the shade!
It’s a wonder they hadn’t escaped already. By the time we were done, I fully expected to see cats causing anarchy as they reclaimed the town, mewing from rooftop and windowsill with barely held contempt for the very people who fed them!
… Why, they should be ashamed!
“I see …” said Renise, with a hum of uncertainty. “Well, I suppose they’re known for their self-sufficiency. But even so, I feel that we shouldn’t leave them in the chance that their artfulness fails. There’s a very dangerous forest between here and the town.”
Coppelia clapped her hands together.
Her interest in the baroness severed, she leaned towards her next source of amusement, her smile alive with all the usual colours of the mischief rainbow.
“That’s right~ cats are pretty smart, right? There’s no way they’ll be caught by the slobbering horrors devoid of mercy and compassion which I kept from eating us.”
“Coppelia, you frightened them away with sticks.”
“Exactly. Sticks thrown using opposable thumbs which cats lack. And that means they know where they are on the food tree. They’re gonna stay here where it’s safe, waiting for the dumb humans to come fetch them like they always do, even though cats do nothing but hiss and scratch at them.”
I gave a cautious nod … all the while leaning further away.
“Yes, well, I’m glad you agree. We’ve no need to lift a finger to rescue them.”
“Mmh~ but even so, aren’t you willingly leaving gold on the table?”
“Excuse me?”
“I bet every cat has a poster somewhere up in the Adventurer’s Guild. That’s a whole bunch of change you’re leaving lying around that could be used for our apple strudel budget.”
I was aghast.
Not only at the suggestion our funds went entirely towards the apple strudels she ate before I could even touch them … but also because I knew exactly what Coppelia was doing!
My keen eyes could see through her deep subterfuge!
True, it was only prudent to ensure our personal finances were as secure as possible … but even so!
I had my pride!
In my darkest dreams, I still recalled the shame of rescuing a warehouse of cats in Trierport! There was no scenario in which I’d willingly suffer such humiliation again! Once my dignity was stripped, what was I, but a beautiful maiden without equal?
Indeed, I had no doubt in my mind!
I, Juliette Contzen, 3rd Princess to the Kingdom of Tirea, would absolutely not resort to saving lost cats!
“The Adventurer’s Guild will never be happier,” said Coppelia brightly. “I bet that in less than a day, a literal army of adventurers will be swooping in to claim all the free cats for themselves. They’ll be everywhere. Literally everywhere. Productivity will be at its highest. You’ll be actively supporting the livelihoods of all those guys you see drinking themselves into a coma!”
Renise blinked, then looked at me with an expression filled with new warmth.
“Oh, I see! You intend to leave these cats behind to be collected by new adventurers. That’s very thoughtful of you. I understand now. This must be how high-ranked adventurers help their juniors progress and gain confidence in their skills.”
Renise filled the ensuing silence with her smile.
And then–
She slowly waved a hand in front of my face.
“... Miss Coppelia, why isn’t she responding?”
“Oh, don’t worry about it. Her cogs get stuck every now and again.”
“I see … ? Should we do something or … ?”
“Mmh~ I’ll scoop up the striped ones! You get the normal ones!”
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Hello everyone. I’ve been searching high and low for a potential answer to this. For the last 6-8 months, my secondary fridge/freezer in the garage has had a strong chlorine-like smell. It’s strongest in the freezer and because of the vent between freezer and fridge, it has travelled to the fridge. I’ve tried airing it out, removing anything that could be a potential source, and thoroughly cleaning it out.
A a local repair technician looked it over a couple of months ago and said there was nothing wrong with it and ruled out a Freon or fluid leak. He suggested it was just a “bad smell” and that others get rid of fridge smells with baking soda or cleaning it with bleach. Since then, I have cleaned out every item, washed the racks and shelves, and wiped down the inside. The smell persists. It even penetrates things like food boxes or containers which then makes my hands or kitchen smell like chlorine as well.
My greatest concern is something noxious getting on my food. My secondary complaint is that it makes the containers smell, including beverage bottles. It taints the drink flavor to smell chlorine before sipping!
Thank you all in advance for your answers and advice.

So I am a college student and a type 1 diabetic and while I'm looking to get a pump with vials I am currently using Humalog and Lantus pens and I'm looking for a really small mini fridge that actually works.
Now what I mean by actually works is the fact that when I look up mini fridges on Amazon and I find the ones that hold 6 to 10 cans in their actual description it says that they can cool anywhere from 20 to 38° Fahrenheit below room temperature but then you go to the comments and almost all of them have more than a couple comments stating that it feels like false advertising because it only drops the temperature by 20° at most on average.
Obviously that's a critical problem for diabetics like us because insulin needs to be stored at 36° f to 46° f, and as such if I were to get one of these and it's 75° in my dorm room then at most my insulin's being stored at 55° and thereby will go bad.
I have an actual mini fridge that holds like 40 plus cans and has the tiny freezer that's just a plastic door that can't keep anything frozen so I don't actually use it other than for my ice packs so that when I need transport my insulin for winter break or spring break I have ice packs to throw in my tiny cooler to keep my insulin cold for the multi-hour drive home.
But to be clear I found out I'm a little bit on the Spectrum (no self diagnosis bs, like actual assessment, and if anything it helps because i am a computer science major and i am very meticulous with numbers like my carb counting and insulin dosing) but I prefer my organization, things go in specific areas and places and I came to the realization it would make me much happier if I could have a mini mini fridge that only serves the purpose of holding my insulin in any other medication that would require refrigeration nothing more nothing less and then while traveling I just throw the ice packs in there and since it is obviously insulated it will still serve the purpose of keeping everything inside cold in travel.
I would guess from a scientific perspective the reason why these can't get super cold is because they (the mini mini fridges i have been looking at on amazon) use like a basic fan system to cool them, meanwhile actual refrigerators use coolant type fluids, which is why after transporting them on their side you have to let them sit upright for 24 hours before plugging them in, because you want the coolant to be in the correct areas so that you don't damage it and have catastrophic results.
So does this community know of any really good mini mini fridges that actually work and would fit what I'm looking for. I know this is like super niche of an object, so don't care about the price.

I was always the one that loved kids and wanted 4. I was always the one”who do you want around your future dinner table.” My husband had only wanted one but we settled on the idea of 2 We had a miscarriage in 2019 and then were faced with secondary infertility And then got pregnant in 2020 via IVF And then my son was born in 2021
I know I’m in the minority here but no real complaints during pregnancy. Birth could have been better but also could have been worse
Newborn stage was a dream. My son would wake up, nurse, and go right back to sleep Sure he was up a bunch but compared to what I hear- we got lucky with him
After he turned two we started the discussion on having a 2nd. We had two embryos in the freezer. We said if this didn’t work- we would stop at one and not go through the entire egg retrieval again Our transfer failed and I was more upset than I thought I’d be Jumped right into another and it took and I started getting positives However I also spiraled into depression It became paralyzing and all I did was cry
I had a lot of fears and anxieties. I was terrified of the next having any type of developmentally issues, medically complex issues and terrified of something happening to me. Sure I know things can happen anytime and also things can be fine but I was so afraid. I was afraid of what it would do to my son and how it could change him
It also brought back the anxieties I had while pregnant and the newborn stage. Analyzing every single sonogram and comparing it to “normal” ones on Google, stressing over every milestone, Dr appointment, vaccine.
The depression was real and debilitating. Since I found out so early with IVF about the positive test- I decided to stop the meds that were keeping me pregnant
It was the hardest decision to make Sometimes looking back on my fertility journey- I can’t believe I did it But I think it was more important for my mental health
I keep seeing all these birth announcements for the second baby and I am a bit jealous that I wasn’t strong enough mental But boards like this help and I just keep trying to focus on the positives of being one and done and being able to provide for my son and give him the world he deserves
If you read this far- thank you ♥️

In the Era of Fear I Comfort them with Great Love
Anita Moorjani was cured from cancer not because of a certain medicine, vaccine or chemotherapy. She was cured because of this Great Love. Anita Moorjani is a forty years old woman who is simple and honest. She was born in India, grew up in Singapore and was English educated. Later she went to Hong Kong. She knows Tamil, English and Cantonese. In 2002 the doctor said that she was down with cancer lymphoma or the blood cell tumor. After four years, in 2006 seventy percent of her body is covered with the cancerous cells. She stayed in the hospital, suffering terribly because of this illness. Later the doctor pronounced her death. After three days she woke up and was cured miraculously. This is truly inconceivable when she woke up from her death. In her mind she was very sure she was cured already. No treatment was needed. But she was very weak. She could not even talk. The doctor was surprised of her condition and again they carried out a checking on her body and found that she was free from all symptoms of cancer. In her mind she knew she was already cured. In her mind there was a great transformation that she personally experienced. And all the cells on her body were transformed into healthy cells. Later she wrote a book entitles: After dying once I finally learn to love’ By looking at this title, it coincides with Master Shan Dao’s teaching on the one with deep faith in the dharma. He said, ‘Standing here is waiting to die. Going forward is also death. Turning back, I too cannot escape from death.’ This can be found in the ‘Analogy of two rivers and one white lane’ the three sure deaths. If we have died once, we will truly give ourselves up. This is the same as the Pure Land teaching that we have to admit we are the sinful mundane man. We lose all hope as we have no ways to leave the triple realm. In cultivation we need to really undergo a total death in order to really practise the path. The zen cultivator says this is known as undergoing great death and great living. Otherwise, no real cultivation can be expected because most of us are very arrogant, very self-centred, without much changes in our stubborn mindset. That is why she said after dying once only she managed to learn how to love. In the Pure Land door this is known as having deep faith. Such a man will surely have faith in Amitabha’s 48 vows to gather in living beings without any doubts and suspicion. By relying on the strength of the Buddha’s Vows we will surely attain a rebirth. This is living in the great love of Namo Amitabha Buddha. We receive the love of Amitabha Buddha. Only then we can have the genuine love and we are able to learn to love. If we do not feel the love of Amitabha Buddha, we will not know how to love. Our love will be frightening as it is an attachment, a desire to control, to possess others. Such a love is impure, it is a threat to us. If we are not careful it might turn into hatred. Such is a frightful kind of love. If we learn from Amitabha Buddha, the love is pure, without condition and transparent. This is truly loving a person. It is not easy to learn this. We look at the couples around us. So many got married and end up in divorce. How about those who do not get a divorce? Yes, they spend the whole life fighting！The truly loving couples are as few as the stars in the broad day light. So, learning to love is our homework for the whole life. It is not easy. Today I would like to discuss this passage with you. After reading her writing I feel most shameful as what the author has said is very true in accord with her experience. Even though I have left home for more than twenty years, receiving the teaching of the Buddha, the guidance of the patriarch, the exhortation of my Master, the help of my lotus friends and all, I still feel I am lacking in genuine practice and virtues. On the contrary this lady has not met with the Buddha Dharma. She has such an awakening after dying once, it is truly a gain for her. She said, ‘After my body stopped functioning, I entered into another world.’ She was so seriously ill that her heart, her liver and everything stopped functioning. This is to show there is a world after death. She said, ‘I saw myself as a very wonderful person. This is because I was not terrorised until I had a change in shape.’ ‘I felt there was this vibrant energy around me and I was able to enter it. I realise if a man can see his wonderful existence, he must be the happiest man.’ Most of us like to complain about our imperfect existence. We often think thus, ‘I do not have enough money. I am not healthy. I am not pretty. I do not have enough clothing ….’ Here we must learn to see the good points in us, to appreciate the value of our existence. A woman who can say like this is truly very calm in mind. A man who always complains about himself will not be able to live happily each day. So, without knowing the love of Amitabha for us, we will be a great complainer. We complain about no money, we complain about our look, our wrinkles and so on and so forth. What kind of life will this be with so many complaints? She said, ‘I found that there was this power surrounding me.’ When we pass away, we will no longer be using our eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body and mind to observe. Instead, we will be awakened to our innate Buddha. She felt she is surrounded by this vibrant field of energy and she is also this energy. What kind of power is this? It is a kind of energy. It is always in the universe or the dharma realm in the Buddhist terms. In fact, this is Amitabha Buddha. This is the strength of the Buddha Nature. She uses her Buddha Nature to experience the Buddha Nature. It exists forever. It is neither born nor become extinct. If the Buddha enters the world or does not enter the world, it is always there without changing. Of course, she does not use these Buddhist terms. She said, ‘When I give up the attachment to the mundane world, I enter another world effortlessly. It is unnecessary to pray, to recite a sutra or to give a dharma talk. It is unnecessary to seek forgiveness, repentance or other methods.’ ‘Death gives me the feeling that I do not need to do anything. It is just as though I am telling someone I am coming to the end. I cannot do anything anymore. I give up. Whatever you want to do I will just accept.’ I feel that this passage is very near in meaning to the Pure Land’s view. It means when we die, we have just to let go as nothing can be done anymore. Most people die in torment as there are many attachments in this world. They are worried about their children, money and work. Some people find it difficult to die. So, from here we must learn to let go when it is our turn to leave the world. Moreover, we have the promise from Amitabha Buddha who will come to receive us in accord with the strength of his vows. It is much easier for us. This lady just let go and she entered another world. Her state should be quite high too. I will explain below. I feel that she had arrived at the border of the Pure Land. Her state of an awakened mind showed that she was not in the heaven. She seemed to be enlightened to the Buddha nature and non -existence of a self. She experienced the light of enlightenment and returned to life, to lead a life of love. So, in our practice we are told to let go of all attachment and to wish for a rebirth in the Pure Land relying on Amitabha’s strength of vows. So from here we can see it is very easy to be born in the World of Ultimate Bliss. She said it is unnecessary to recite a sutra, a dharma or seeking for forgiveness. She enters the other world naturally when she simply gives up herself. I remember once I went with my Master to console a dying man. I was very touched by my Master’s words. He said kindly to the man who is on the verge of death, ‘So and so, now we will recite Namo Amitabha Buddha. If you can recite, then recite together. If you can’t, just lay down and relax. It is ok if you just listen to our recitation.’ Are not these words very comforting? The dying man will feel very safe and relax. But if you were to say, ‘So and so, this is the last chance. Bring out all your strength to face death. If you can recite then recite together. If you cannot recite, you must try also!’ On listening to this threat, the sick man is stressed out. He will die instantly as he has no strength to join in recitation. The Master who with his great love understands the rescue of Amitabha Buddha is a natural process that he is able to say in such a comforting way. No condition is needed. There is no threat nor fright in his words. A man who threatens people is not calm as he must be frightened too in his mind. That is why what he says will frighten people, giving stress to others. If we are loving in our mind, our words will only bring love, peace and calm to others. People will feel our love for them. So, this lady says it is unnecessary to read or recite any prayer or seeking forgiveness. This is because the wavelength of her mind is on a par with the great love of the universe. She naturally enters it. Namo Amitabha Buddha is a dharma that requires no seeking or pleading. It is a dharma of rescue without condition. When we recite Namo Amitabha Buddha, the wavelength of our mind is the same as Amitabha Buddha. So, we will attain a rebirth naturally. Many of us who do not understand the kindness of Amitabha Buddha will seek a rebirth by pleading to the Buddha every day. His mind is unsettled and frightened that he might be left out. This is because he does not understand when he recites the Buddha’s name, the wavelength of his mind is in the same frequency with Amitabha Buddha’s mind and vows. Then people will ask, ‘Do we still go to recite the Buddha’s Name for the dying man?’ ‘Yes, of course.’ This is because the dying man has yet to understand this point. When we recite for him, he will be safe in the shine of Namo Amitabha Buddha. This is a method which is bestowed upon us to save us with this Name in accord with the strength of the Buddha’s vows. When she says to somebody, this refers to Amitabha Buddha. She says she cannot do anything anymore and she gives up. She gives herself up to the Buddha. So, when we die do not try to fight with death and refuse to die. We must just admit we are the offender and we need the help of Amitabha Buddha to take us, to rescue us. Namo is to admit we take refuge in the Buddha, we surrender ourselves. When we cultivate this door, we must not add in our ideas. We must just let Amitabha Buddha to decide for us. This is because Amitabha has the power of great vow, the extensive great strength of the Buddha Nature, the strength of immeasurable light, the strength of immeasurable lifespan. We just have to give up all planning. He will plan for us. So, when we recite the Name of the Buddha, just recite without thinking of doing this or that trying so hard to reach a certain acceptable standard. These are all unnecessary. This type of thinking is the habit of the sagely path cultivators. When we sit on the plane, just sit there. The plane will bring you to your destiny. It is unnecessary for you to help the plane to fly. Amitabha Buddha the pilot does not need you to fly the plane. If he needs your help then he is not known as Amitabha Buddha. Anita said, ‘In the other world, I found that my mind is very clear and bright. I realise by myself that I will only die out of the fear and terror in my mind.’ These words are very true. Clarity of mind means her mind is pure. In this world our mind is turbid, dark and deluded. That is why are enveloped in all kinds of worries and terror. But once we arrive at the Pure Land, we will naturally be pure and bright. This is because the land is pure and is enveloped in bright illumination. She said she naturally know she will be cured. This knowing ability is possessed by us originally. No learning is needed because our Buddha nature is originally pure and bright. In the Saha world our ability is being covered up by afflictions. But when we arrive at the World of Ultimate Bliss, we will naturally possess this ability. This ability reappears relying on the strength of Vows of Amitabha Buddha. When we arrive at the Pure Land, we will naturally possess the ability to make offerings to the Buddha. On hearing one sentence we are enlightened to the millions. Our mind is opened up to the thousands of million Dharanis. Everyone of us have this innate ability. And Amitabha Buddha’s strength of Vows enhances its opening. In this Saha World our innate nature is all covered up and cannot function. In the world of ultimate bliss, by relying on Amitabha Buddha’s strength of great vows, our innate ability is open up. So they are not contradicting. ‘I naturally know the source of the thought that I will die. The source is I was frightened. If there is no fear, there is no death.’ In actuality there is no death. It is only our fear of death that this illusion comes froth. In Buddha dharma we should know death itself is an illusion. Time is also an illusion. That is why the Buddha speaks all the Sutra in this manner, ‘Thus have I heard, at one time the Buddha was…..’ No specific time is stated. Now the physics has proven its illusory. As time is an illusion, it does not exist. Let me give you an example of what is meant by death. It is as if we are driving a car into a tunnel. The shape of the tunnel resembles that of a tomb. And we keep on driving into it. We say we are entering the tomb, that we are going to die soon. We are threatened as the entrance represents death. We continue on our journey in the tunnel and later leave the tunnel, again travelling on our way to another destiny. The entrance of the tunnel, the funeral wreath looks like the tomb. For us, death is a terrible idea that we are fearful of it. We do not know life is a continuity and there is no death. It is our wrong concept that there is this section of birth and death. No one can do anything about it until they personally realise it. ‘I am unable to live out my real self as I have too much worried.’ Most of us live in this world wearing a mask. If everyone of us is free to show our real self this is the most beautiful side of a self. Why cannot we live the way we should live? It is because we are always burdened with worries. We are worried we are not good enough. We are worried that our parents will scold us. We are worried our teacher will get angry and criticize us. We are worried about losing face. We only live for others. We lose our life away trying to accord to others’ expectation. We lose the light of a happy life. Our life is controlled by all these worrisome thoughts. But if we truly recite the Buddha’s Name, our mind will be at ease. Amitabha Buddha takes away our worries by replacing them with Namo Amitabha Buddha. We will realise all these worries and views are not important and we will gradually pay no attention to them. Our true life is Buddha recitation. That is our real identity. Our mind will be at ease as we will pay no attention to those unreal things, words and ideas. Our worries only arise when we care too much about the mundane matters. The author has not learnt about Buddhism. This is her experience in death. What she has written is very personal, true experience, not something that we learn from a book. Her experience gives her an awakening to the reality of life and she lives out her life in this awakening. I saw her video and I feel she is an enlightened person. An enlightened person may not be replete with spiritual penetration. But she will reveal her love in her daily living. She is calm at ease and without any sense of fear in her mind. She leads her life in a genuine way. She said, ‘I know that cancer is not a punishment neither is it a retribution. Cancer is my energy capacity which reveals itself on my body. Because of my fear I am unable to reveal the beautiful self in me. And this is the job which should be carried out by me. I know that cancer is not a punishment which is forced on me. It is not an external force of retribution.’ This is what we often do when certain things happen, we will try to find an excuse or put the blame on reward or retribution. We treat the misfortune with anger and hatred. We often have this tendency to catogorise every happening in accord with the cause or reason. In Buddhism we talk about cause and effect. As she is not a Buddhist she says, ‘Cancer appears as a result of a change in my energy capacity. This energy shows itself in the form of cancer.’ This is because she lives in fear and worries. She does not live out her real happy self. So if we the Buddha recitation cultivators are able to reveal the bright side of life, to live without worries, there will be no more cancer for us. This is her understanding about life. That is why I have often said, ‘Lead a life of a mundane man and recite the Buddha’s Name sincerely.’ We should lead a life of Amitabha Buddha. Our life will be full of light and blessings. And we will become more loving. Finally we will lead a comfortable life and people around us will be comfortable also. This itself is the propagation of the dharma of love. Otherwise, if we cannot live a loving life, there is no point talking about anything as they will be useless. Anita said, ‘In that state which is vast and limitless, I found that I am too strict with myself. I keep on whipping myself.’ Can we feel the existence of being vast and limitless? No. We are often limited by our surrounding. As she had entered the limitless vastness, she is able to know her whole life. She knows her fault is being too strict with herself. In fact, most of us are very strict with ourselves, demanding ourselves to be like this or that. She said, ‘No one is punishing me. The person whom I cannot forgive is I myself. I have abandoned myself. I do not love myself. This matter is none of others’ business.’ No one from outside comes to punish us. It is we who punish ourselves. We cannot forgive our selves. We add on a lot of unnecessary locks and chains on ourselves. What is more for us the Buddha reciters? If we recite the Buddha’s name and on the other hand, we add on ourselves lots of locks and chains whence Amitabha Buddha is trying to unlock us, isn’t this a most pitiful situation?’ She said that she had abandoned herself. It means we throw ourselves away and become a lone ranger, an isolated person living a life of sadness, a live without love. Look at a baby. Her eyes are clear as the baby is a simple being, just like a simple puppies or baby cat. The baby can play with chickens, puppis as she does not give rise to diffentiation. Not everyone of us is like Anita. But every one of us can recite the Buddha’s name. When we recite the Buddha’s name, we will be calm. Amitabha Buddha said, ‘In the world of fear I comfort them with great love.’ It is because all the worries are gone when we accomplish Buddhahood at the Pure Land. We will not be so worried about our poverty, health problem, ugliness, stupidity, inability to recite a sutra, a mantra. All these are unimportant as finally I will become a Buddha in the Buddha Land. We will be more humorous. For example, if we are ugly we will use it as a joke. It does not matter at all. Because all the external states are not you. The real self, our real life is the Buddha’s Name. It is our true identity. It will bring ease to our mind. A baby is pure. But as it grows up, it starts to abandon himself. A baby resembles a glass of pure water. When he grows up, his greed starts to accumulate when he wants a toy, a book, good results, money, benefits, fame women and so on. All these are placed in the glass of water. Everything is a piece of mud that we put in out glass. The more we put into the glass, the more the water will flow out. This water is the genuine self. We abandon the true self, chase it out with our greed. We fill ourselves with all the rubbish. The genuine blessings and bliss are chased away. We lead an opaque life without transparency. Our life become a glass of muddy water and we live in great torment. The more we obtain, the more we lose ourselves. That is why the Buddha is truly kind. He and his disciples lead a life of a beggar. When you have nothing, you will be happy and relax. The mind retains its purity. Human beings are deluded as they think to possess a wife, children, a house, a car are called blessings. A man who truly loves himself does not love money, sex, fame, food, sleep. These five desires are the knives that will cut us into pieces and bring on great sufferings. Anita said, ‘I realise I am the child of the beautiful universe. As long as I exist, I will obtain this unconditional love.’ This is very good. I would like to make the following changes, ‘I realize that I am the son of the adorned Amitabha Buddha.’ In Buddhism we use adorned to replace the word beautiful. The universe is this Amitabha Buddha. In the Sutra we are told Amitabha Buddha is the Treasury Body of the Dharma Realm. Amitabha Buddha exists in the whole of the Dharma Realm. Of course, there are also the reward body and transformation bodies beside the dharma body. Amitabha Buddha is the immeasurable wisdom and lifespan. Anita says that the universal energy is abundant and inexhaustible, vast and without limits. This is the existence of the Buddha Nature. She says as long as she exists, she will surely obtain the unconditional love. I often also say, ‘No conditions are required for us to receive the love and rescue of Amitabha Buddha.’ Let us take the analogy of a tree. As long as it exists, it will receive the sunlight. No other condition is needed. So it is the same for the house and everything on earth. Amitabha Buddha’s Name is also known as the Light that Far-surpassing the Sun and Moon. Amitabha Buddha’s light pervasively illumines all the living beings and things in the world. As long as we exist, we will receive the light of the Buddha, the protection of his loving kindness and rescue. It is unnecessary for us to become somebody so as to receive the unconditional rescue of Amitabha Buddha. Our Master Hui Jing also wrote a book on the ‘Unconditional Rescue of the Buddha.’ Some people cannot believe. He says, ‘If this is the case everyone will commit evils.’ Such a thinking is negative and full of fear as his mind is dwelling in darkness. He is afraid that the world will go upside down. He cannot understand that as long as there is the existence, may they be a cat, a dog, a hell being, they will be taken care of by Amitabha Buddha. The only condition is they exist. This reminds me of the words of Great Master Tan Luan, ‘The future scholars who hear about the rescue of the Buddha, the rescue that relies on other’s strength, he should give rise to faith. Do not refuse such a chance. It is being stupid.’ Do not think that you should do this and that to obtain the rescue? Amitabha Buddha did not ask you to do anything. He says, ‘Living beings in the ten directions who have faith in me.’ It means they exist and the Buddha will be there to save them. Buddha recitation is not a condition. It is just a method of saving. Anita says, ‘I do not have to do anything to obtain this love.’ Just like a blade of grass in the water. Does it need to do anything to obtain water? It is unnecessary. As long as it exists, it is surrounded by the water. As long as we exist, we are surrounded by the love of Amitabha Buddha. We do not need to do anything to obtain this love and care. Once we know this, we will be fearless and calm at ease. This is the same as the sunlight which shine on the mountain and also the valley. In our life no matter what level we are we will receive the illumination of Amitabha Buddha. Anita says, ‘No prayer, no seeking is needed.’ Amitabha’s rescue is there always. As long as we recite, we will be saved by him. Amitabha Buddha says, ‘All living beings in the ten directions who call on me will be saved by me. You only have to say out my name.’ You say you are dumb and cannot call the name. Such a man who understands the rescue of Buddha will also be saved even if he cannot pronounce the Name. But if you are unwilling, you are creating an obstacle for yourself. That is why our dharma door is known as the ‘The Dharma is taught without being asked.’, the ‘Befriend us without being asked’. As long as we trust him, he will come personally to take us to his Pure Land. On hearing that nothing is needed to be done, some will be confused. They want to do something, to clean the altar, to change the water, to offer some fruits and incense, to sit in meditation and so on. They think this will help them to attain a rebirth. They have to do something. They do not realise what they need to do is to reveal the beautiful self, to lead the adorned life and let themselves become the love. As long as we sit there and lead a loving life we are in accord with the love of the Buddha Amitabha. When the sun is shining, you say, ‘It is good. A shiny day.’ When it is raining, you say, ‘Very good. It is raining now.’ When it snows, you say, ‘Good, I love snow.’ This way of living is to add the positive loving energy to this universe. You are spreading the pure and harmony energy to the universe. In the Buddha Dharma it is known as the lights shine on one another. The whole universe will receive the positive energy of your loving and harmonious mind. So, what you need to do is to recite Namo Amitabha Budda loudly, softly, silently. All will be ok. If we live this way, Amitabha Buddha will be most happy to see us. It is just like a child who is sleeping in the cradle. Doing nothing. What do you think? Will the mother be happy to see him like that? Yes, of course. She will be very glad with him just sleeping there. Nothing has to be done. A child in the arms of his mother is the revelation of total trust. And this is the same for us to be in the arms of Amitabha Buddha. We just relax and trust him. We will lead a happy life. And this is the genuine way of living in accord with the love of oneself. More often than not we lead a life with worries, fear, twisted emotions and trying to cover up our faults. Our adorned life cannot be revealed. Everyday, we live in fear and worries. This is adding chains and locks to ourselves. Anita says, ‘I have never truly loved myself before. I have never valued my existence. I have never seen the adorned soul in me.’ She uses soul to describe herself. In the Buddha Dharma this refers to the beauty and adorned Buddha Nature. She said, ‘I am so beautiful yet I have never realised it. It is replaced with the hard facts of mundane existence. I decay because I do not understand my beautiful soul.’ In the Buddha Dharma it is described as all living beings are originally the Buddha. Yet we do not live, in accord with our Buddha Nature. We are often controlled by our mundane existence, the salary, the examination results and such like. We forget of our Buddha Nature. We lead a life of decay, a life of erosion. This is the General path of Buddhism. From the angle of Buddha Recitation, the rescue of Amitabha is always with us, only that we do not realise it. We try all kinds of methods hoping for the Buddha to rescue us. We do not know that we just have to admit we are the mundane men who are covered with offences. There is no other way to save ourselves if we do not rely on Amitabha Buddha. Then we let go and recite the Buddha’s Name wholeheartedly. This is the way to be saved by the Buddha. But most people cannot understand this. They want to do something good, to be pretentious and make out something good of himself, to scold people for their lacking in virtues and such like. This is against the practise of this pure land door. Why cannot the people in the world see their pretention? It is because they are also not living a true life. Their eyes are not clear enough to see through this pretention. A fake man sees something fake and he will treat it as genuine. A clear -headed man will surely be able to see through all these false masks. If we were to wear a false mask for too long it will be difficult to remove it. It has grown on to our skin. It will be painful if we want to remove this fake mask. So it takes time for us to loosen this false mask as we have been wearing them for too long. Anita says, ‘This understanding makes me realise that I do not have to be frightened anymore.’ There is no more fear in her mind. It is a mind of calm and bliss. It is a mind which is full of hope. It is a comforting mind that can soothe others. With this calm and happy mind it is already a contribution to all around us. It is already a protection and mindfulness to all around us. We do not have to do anything at all. Most of us live in fear. We pay for insurance because we are afraid when we get old, we have no money, no money to pay the medical fees. We get married out of fear that we will be lonely. Why do we give birth to children? We are afraid no one will take care of us at old age. Why do we go to school? It is because we are afraid of our mother’s anger. Why must we study hard? We are afraid of our teacher. Why do we go to university? We are afraid people will look down on us. Can we live without fear? We cannot. Even our mother who loves us so much say we will suffer if we do not study hard. From our young age we receive the education of fear. We are threatened by our beloved parents, our responsible teachers. We do not receive the education of love. So, if we love our children, do not add fear to them. We must give only love and courage so that they can face life with their original positive energy, positive strength. This is because the world is full of twisted people, fake people, suffering people. There are very few upright men, genuine men, happy and hopeful men around. I only hope all of you my lotus friends will bring up a future generation who is upright, genuine, happy and hopeful with the strength of Amitabha Buddha. So, we must lead a life based on the right values taught by Amitabha Buddha. If we teach our child to fight for self -benefit, to contend with others, we are making them blind so that they do not see the truth of life. This is harming them. If we are enlightened to this, we will only rely on Amitabha Buddha. We are not afraid to be lonely. We will be at ease. Those who see the light, the warmth of the Buddha will no longer be frightened. Anita says, ‘I realise this is a state that can be reached by myself and everyone.’ In Zen sect it is said all living beings are Buddha. In the Buddha recitation door, everyone can recite the Name, everyone can attain a rebirth and everyone can accomplish Buddhahood. This is the bestowment by Amitabha Buddha. All the things that we fight for may not be beneficial to us. Everything that benefits us are often free. For example, the air we take in every instant is free. We do not pay to stand on the earth. We do not pay to look at the sky above. Whatever we fight and earn to get are valueless. Everything that is valuable is free. In the general practice it is said, ‘No cultivation is the cultivation. Nothing is obtainable. This is the state of a bodhisattva. The original face of all dharma often dwells in the mark of still extinction. Our Buddha Nature is replete with all merits and virtues. We cannot cultivate anything to enhance it. This is because all the things that we can do are only dreams, illusion, bubbles and shadow. Whatever that we do, that we create are not in accord with our Buddha Nature. The Buddha Nature is always there, original and shining out naturally. And in our Pure Land Dharma, whatever we have offered, whatever we have done are not the causes for our attainment of a rebirth. Attaining a rebirth is the state of nothing doing. It stays apart from creation or doing. It is a natural state. Reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha helps us to return to this state. Anita said, ‘So I decided to return to the mundane world.’ She has enlightened to the opportunity of life and she decided to come back to tell us about life. Just like many Pure Land cultivators who say that they will not come back any more to sufferings. Yet when they arrive at the Pure Land and brings forth the Bodhi mind, they will come back by themselves to help other beings. Anita said, ‘When I was on the verge of death, I realised the universe comes forth from unconditional love. I am one of the revelations of this love in my present form.’ For the scientists they will say the universe is made from electron, protons, neutrons and so on. This is talking only at the surface level, the materials. But as she talked from her true experienc,e she can see all the things, all the people are the expression of this universal love. When she comes back from death, she deeply penetrates the genuine love the mother universe and her wavelength is in accord with the universal love. She comes back as a healthy woman. So once there is a change in our mind set, the body, the people and the surroundings will also change. In the eyes of Buddha and Bodhisattva there is no differentiation of filth and purity. Everything is pure and adorned in its own expression. Every one of us is the art piece of this unconditional love or in the Buddha’s words, the Buddha Nature. She said, ‘I cannot change into another form as it is my original expression, original nature of this unconditional love.’ Everything that exists is the expression of the Buddha Nature. Even something which is defiled or unwholesome is also part of the expression of this unconditional everlasting love. That is why the Buddha says, ‘All the Dharma from the original state dwells constantly in still extinction.’ Still extinction refers to Nirvana the state of the Buddha. So, when we recite the Buddha’s Name we will enter the Buddha’s dwelling. ‘The energy capacity of the strength of life forms derives from love. And I am made from the universal energy capacity. On knowing this, I realise I do not need to become somebody else. And my true value will not be depreciated too.’ Anita said, So, it is unnecessary for us to become another man. A business man does not need to become Jack Ma. Why is this so? It is because you are equal to him. He is not higher than you. He has the Buddha Nature and you also have the Buddha Nature. Every one is equal. So we do not need to measure in terms of money especially if we truly know the benefits of Buddha recitation. In the eyes of the Buddha every one of us is a shining star. We do not need to chase after another star. Just imagine the havoc it will be when the stars do not dwell in its orbit and try to chase after another star. What a chaos the universe will become. Everyone of our existence is in perfect conditions in the eyes of the Buddha and Bodhisattva. ‘This is the I that I have always wanted to be.’ she said. We must learn to appreciate ourselves, accept ourselves and love ourselves. This ‘I’ is invaluable under the unconditional love of the Rescue of Amitabha Buddha. We are his precious sons, the pearls on his hand. If we are accepted by the Buddha, we will be so happy as we will have no complaint about ourselves. We are often surrounded by people who keep on complaining about us. The first one is our mother who says that we are not clever, we have low marks. We are not filial. We earn too little. See how our mother teaches us not to appreciate ourselves. Then we are blamed by our teacher, our classmates, our girl -friend and so on. Then comes Amitabha Buddha who studies us and says, ‘Put aside all the complaints. You are qualified to attain Buddhahood. No problem at all. I give you 100 percent.’ That is why we Buddha Recitation Practitioners are always at ease under the shine of Amitabha Buddha who give us the confirmation. This is the greatest benefits the Buddha bestows upon us. Buddhism brings hope and bliss to the world, the universe. So, in this life’s time we must try our best to lead a life of Amitabha Buddha. Do not be swayed by the mundane values, mundane eyes, mundane perspective. We rely only on the outlook of the Buddha and Bodhisattva. ‘Once we know that we are this love, it is unnecessary to purposely go forth to shower love on others. As long as we are faithful to our original nature, we will automatically become the tools of love, touching the hearts of everyone who have affinity with us.’ This part of her speech is very good. If we are already the lamp, there is no need for us to go out purposely to shine on others. The lamp just stands at its place and it manages to brighten up the place. So, when we are the LOVE, we will naturally touch those around us with our love. Take a look at our Master Hui Jing. He sits there quietly and yet every one of us are calm and happy naturally. So when we become the love, wherever we are, all will feel calm at ease, without any fear. Anita said, ‘The most important thing I have learnt is I am the Love itself. All my fears are gone. This is the reason I come into life again.’ Amitabha Buddha said, ‘I will transform all the fear into great calmness, great serenity’ When We recite His Name we are charged with his love. We also become the love. We will leave behind all fear. ‘My dear, you will always be loved. You do not need to harbour any fear. There is no way for you to commit any errors.’ Always think about these three sentences. There is the light of truth in it. This is spoken by a non -Buddhist who was on the verge of her death and who lives again. How about us the Buddha Recitation Practitioners? Can we deny the love of Amitabha Buddha, His unconditional love of rescue? From this story we know the unconditional love of rescue of the Buddha pervasively surrounds us. We must have faith in this and lead a life of joy with no more fear. Nowadays, everyone lives in fear. We must learn to replete ourselves with love and bring this shine to others, to lead them out of fear. Love yourself and love others. Namo Amitabha Buddha. A dharma talk by Dharma Master Shi Jing Zong, the Abbot of the Hong Yuan Monastery in Anhui, China entitled: Dying Once to Learn to Love Link: https://oridharma.wordpress.com/2020/05/16/in-the-era-of-fear-i-comfort-them-with-great-love/