The thing about this climate crisis that no one talks about is that economically, this is not new. This is the same sort of shift as any other massive economic shift we've seen in history, whether resulting from technology or environment or society or any combination of the three. It will be rapid; as rapid as the economic expansion of Europe when it discovered just how profitable colonisation and slavery were. But it's not really anything unseen in an economic sense.
How markets work is this: everything is just supply and demand. If there is a known demand for something, in a roundabout way, the market will ensure that demand is supplied. It might melt a few glaciers in the meantime, or be delayed by a war or two, but it's a force akin to that of nature, or evolution, or cause and effect. The markets will balance. Eventually.

A detour through history

The Chinese never developed eye-glasses. They didn't have the need for glass, because their drink of choice was tea, so the materials they worked with were mostly ceramics. In Europe, the cultural drink of refinement was wine. This didn't need to be kept hot, or be brewed and poured perfectly and all that stuff I'm told is important with tea. But it had requirements and qualities of its own, and one of them is that it looks pretty on display -- and that's why Europe developed and refined glass so much faster than China.
Glass is an incredibly old invention. It's fragile, much more fragile than pottery, so we rarely find it in archeological digs. But it's been invented in and/or expanded to many many cultures throughout history since at least 2000 BC in Egypt, Mesopotamia, and Syria, followed by the Greeks, the Romans, the Canaan, and the Persians. Basically anyone with an empire, including the Chinese, was making glass. Unfortunately they'd only just discovered transparent glass by the late Bronze Age, when the Bronze Age collapsed due to a series of environmental, migratory and urban changes.
(A good reminder that historically, periods of mass technological advancement are followed by civilisation collapses and dark ages. Until the present, of course. But that's been true of every present.)
A lot of glass-making technology was lost, but some important things were saved and some new stuff was rediscovered, and most of this discovering happened in Europe because they had, as I mentioned, wine. And rich people wanted to show off their pretty, colourful wine, and that only worked if your glass was transparent. And Italy had access to pure silica quartz, plus soda ash via their trade with the Levant, and so some clever spark there developed the first pair of eyeglasses.
And that's how you have Mecca, Italy and Venice (the latter of whom had been producing the famous Venetian glass, but moved all their glassmakers to Italy because they'd built all their buildings out of wood) all mass producing eye-glasses with consistent standards for Europe and the Middle East by the 14th century.
This might seem like a small development, but gradual loss of sight used to be a disability. Like, it seriously disabled people from doing many things. Far-sightedness meant artisans couldn't create and scholars couldn't read -- I can't even imagine how many people died falling off a horse just because they were short-sighted. For civilisations to have access to devices that got them decades of productivity out of some of the most skilled people in their societies was massive. And that's part of how you get European dominance over Asia, because the Chinese economic powerhouses didn't care about glass as much as Europe did. It's not enough to just invent something. To develop a technology, a society needs both the resources to play with and the need to play with it. That's why we get so much advancement from war. You can thank Germany for your microwave.

How on earth is this relevant to the market or our climate crisis?

Glass will be invented, and then it will be forgotten, and then it will be invented again. But only some economies flourished from it.
We have no control over anything but us. And that's terrifying. The climate change that crippled the Bronze Age wasn't even their fault and they still got thrown back to the Dark Ages.
We are going to see our own change in the market. We are going to live it. And one thing is true, whether National or ACT or BP like it or not: fossil fuels cannot continue to be relied upon as a commodity. Not long-term. It's a dying industry, slowly but surely, and it'll die whether we manage to wean ourselves off petrol or whether we use it all up first.
To a lesser extent, this is true of other non-renewables too. We are not at critical mass yet with our lithium-ion batteries, but we're now at the stage where people in the third world all seem to have cellphones. This is not a sustainable practice for a limited metal we have to mine from the earth. When something is running out, we don't have to stop using that material in the things we build; if we start to use it all up, it will soon get too expensive to build with, and that will stop us.
And that's why we have to stop using it: because if you as a country or industry pour all your energy and resources into developing technology based off that now-scarce resource, you will be left with no usable technology when that resource runs out.

What are National doing?

This is a political sub, so I won't mince words: something's gone wrong with National. Something's always been wrong with ACT, but National's change is recent. Power has been centralised in the board and the candidate selection process is no longer in the hands of the rank and file after Steven Joyce's shakeup, instead dominated by corporate interests. And they have dominated. We have a cabinet of lobbyists, and not just on National's side of the board; Luxon has pulled together the whole industry.
When we attribute "intentions" to things like forces and political parties, it can be easy to forget there's not a concerted, rational mind at play behind their decisions, and their actions are influenced by all of the people and factors and forces that make them up. When I say, "National has been bought by lobbyists", I don't mean every single person in the party is a corporate shill. I just mean that there is enough corporate, business, and big-money influence in the party that they are no longer being governed primarily by their voter base or even their party members.
Nothing makes this more obvious than National's direction in politics. When your LABOUR and GREEN parties are the ones proposing to fix your climate crisis via free-market ingenuity that we can patent, sell on and capitalise off, something has gone wrong. There is money to be made in climate change, and National are off chasing oil down the bottom of a well.
If we don't wean ourselves off fossil fuels, we will find ourselves paying for it the increased price for them when we don't have the green technology to utilise at the end of supply. If we don't put our minds to green tech and science, we won't have the environment-saving and cleaning and reinforcing products and knowledge to sell on when the demand for them peaks through the ceiling -- instead we will be buying from other countries at big prices, paying to ship their experts here to tell us how to manage our estuaries or dump sites or skink habitats or whatever it is we need to fix next. New Zealand got lucky with our green energy; we were already using renewables by sheer coincidence when the climate crisis struck, and it made our transition to this new world very smooth. We will not be that lucky again.
Look at what we produce as a country. We held on far too long to our wool market out of some idea that it was "what we were supposed to be doing", and it nearly wrecked the country. Because it took us so long to change, and because we'd converted all our land into pasture, the most effective market for us to turn to became beef. Now that market is thriving, and we are willfully ignoring the real economic costs that will come with being a beef export country, and that cost is methane. There is not a future where countries will be allowed to emit methane for free. And there are no methane-light cows to switch to. Not until we develop them.
And this is what people talk about when they talk about environmental solutions still to be developed -- as if other people are going to develop them. That is incorrect. WE are the Cow Country. WE are the ones that should be foremost of the cow-fart field. If we do, we will be the ones benefitting by selling our bio-engineered cows and our science that made it happen. But if we don't, if we trail behind, we let other countries get out in front, and then our industry relies on them, and their industry outgrows us.
And these are all individual product or problem examples, but we are dragging our feet across the entire green industry. Why?

Big Oil does not care if your tech is Green

I say big oil, but there are other anti-environment and pro-corporate interests at play here. And again, there's not some big puppetmaster moving his pawn pieces, but there is influence, and companies don't want the world to go green, because when they do, they stop getting money for all the things they're getting money from right now. They don't care about the environment because they don't have the capacity to care; they are not a they. They are a force, a conglomeration, a hivemind of workers breaking their back for the company, until they clock off and become their own person again.
Their only interest is keeping ahold of their incredibly profitable market, and that market needs machines that use oil, and consumers willing to buy those machines, and people who aren't thinking about switching to a non-oil version of their tractor that doesn't exist yet (because no one has found the need to invent it. Or had the right resources.)
Oil cares about oil. Mining cares about mining. Tobacco cares about tobacco. Beef cares about beef. And we get value out of these industries as a country, as a society, so when they say"This thing is bad for me", we do have to listen to that. Otherwise we won't get our beef, or our oil. But "This thing is bad for ME" isn't the same as "This thing is bad for YOU". And companies are relying on consumers to not know the difference.

Back to National

Tobacco lobbyists have bought out Parliament, and are literally drafting our tobacco laws. And they are just one interest around the table. But they have had a huge effect. Imagine what's happening to the interests of your politicians when you have your lobbyists working together. Imagine where the interests of lobbyists for mining and oil might meet. Now imagine fisheries has a guy in there too.
Our oceans should be feeling very nervous right now.
It's the small influences we can't see that make these big decisions later on. The people who select our future MPs. The people who decide, hey, I'm going to try this new glass technique. But it takes an awful lot of decisions to make a glassblowing society.
A lot of what we do, we don't do consciously, like developing eye-glasses. But the benefit of our open democries, of our information-based societies, of our unprecedented understanding of economies and markets and science and climate, should mean that when we choose to do something consciously, we can do it.
When we don't, something has gone wrong.

A Green Future

To get to the sort of green economy the non-business parties are picturing, you need someone who has the time and acumen to get us there.
That SHOULD be National. There is so much involved in politics; our politicians are running so much. And they're spending most of their time undoing the last guy's policies. Labour's policies sound like the Greens. National doesn't have any except "win". ACT are doing Charter Schools again. And the policies being made are being made in the interests of business people.
Our politicians don't have visions like Hollyoake of a New Zealand forging our own future, or Muldoon's determination to make things better for the average kiwi, or (heaven help me), Roger Douglass's respect for politics. None of the old guard are happy with how politics is shaping up, and certainly not the right, or who eventually became the right, in Douglass's case -- this is what he had to say on the subject: “John Key lived by the polls and it’s very dangerous. If you want to help people, you have to tell them the truth. The problem is that the politicians of today, they want to help themselves. So they poll in order to know what to say and it’s disgusting.”
I think in that one sentence, Douglass sums up everything wrong with the modern National Party. Once upon a time, National were in it to help people. They're not anymore.

Where to now?

It's all just markets.
If National won't change, they'll kill their market and they'll be replaced by a new party, just like the Liberal Party and Reform Party and Social Credit Party before them. National and Labour have always been around, but not always as these parties, or in these forms. The political spectrum will move to meet demand -- even when curtailed by corporate interests.
Or National will change, take control of their candidates and board, and live to fight for another century or so.
Either way, the economy will continue, and so will climate change. We will still need to develop new technologies using our available resources, and direct our technology-developing towards fixing environmental solutions. I hope New Zealand will benefit from this, and not just witness it. But if it's not National making the push, another political party will. We can see that happening right now, with the other parties suggesting their own green business ideas that National should be sweeping up votes for. There is voter and consumer demand for green businesses, and National are distracting us instead with shiny baubles because the corporations influencing them don't want you to see them.
Another thing Douglass was frustratingly right about: all our parties are doing at the moment is undoing each other's policies. It's hard to see New Zealand making any forwards progress at all if that's our direction.

I watched the movie, it was good, I assumed it would be, since the screenplay was made by the author himself. Everything was full of tension, there were many twists, although I must say this is not exactly john le carré material. Henry was willing to sacrifice all the lives on the airplane for the woman he loved. That's kinda cliché, but it shows it focused more on the characters than on the plot. I didn't read the book though.
The point is, however, that everything fit, except for Treble. My guess is it was some personal hitman Henry hired to kill Celia, but I hope the book explains it. Maybe he's not present. Also, Vick and Karl worked together? I saw Vick calling him, what does it mean?

I Accepted a Job to Film on the Dark Web
Man, I am pumped to tell you chronically online content addicts my story. Wait is that too mean of an intro? Will this get taken down for harassment since I painted too accurate a picture of the people on this site? Sorry, everyone, I’m sure you all smell like an expensive bakery and have touched grass this morning. Anyway, I promise I have something interesting. It even involves the dark web you uncreative writers cream yourselves over! I mean, totally real people speaking about their strangely similar experiences. Okay, fine I’ll stop bullying you through the screen before you click off.
This all started when I was seven years old and my parents were killed in front of me in an anti-indigenous hate crime, but let's be real you don’t care. I’m just some annoying Cherokee kid with dead parents so I’ll skip to the good parts. I spent years in an orphanage, gradually becoming more interested in death and violence. As bad as it is, I went out of my way to expose myself to that content in the hopes of desensitizing myself. Which ended up working too well, since now I’m obsessed with causing and viewing pain, though I don’t find any joy in hurting myself.
I got adopted at twelve and after a few months of staying at my new family’s home on the reservation, I went with them to a state sweatier than the average Reddit user, California. Long story short, both of my caretakers, whom I referred to as Uncle and Auntie because they could never be my parents, died. Leaving me in the care of their older son, who I call cousin. I’m not stupid enough to give up any real names, so I’ll call him Brick, cause he’s as dumb as one. He was in his early 20s when he was tasked with taking care of me and is the world’s worst excuse for a babysitter.
I’m almost always alone at the apartment, with him only coming by to drop off supplies and stay for a few hours so the neighbors don’t get too worried. Unless I get in trouble at school, then he’d suddenly give a shit. It's useful because he doesn't about the gory stuff I look at, but some display of interest would be nice. Oh well, ninety percent of the population sucks so he’s just part of the majority. Now, with that said, you’ll be able to understand the perfect storm that led me here. During my time on the deep web, I found a particular website that caught my eye. They had new footage relatively consistently and they were the easiest for me to access since I didn't go too far into the dark web, especially with all the honey pots lying around.
I even bought a couple of files for myself to study and admire. One thing irritated me though, the cameraman. He was always sobbing, breathing, shaking, or some combination of those. It seriously killed the vibe of the killings. Something I commented on under many videos, often saying I would do a better job filming. A choice that in hindsight was me asking to end up in one of those recordings. I didn't think anything of it at the time. I was mostly the only one who commented but I was sure they wouldn't care. I was embarrassingly wrong.
I was staying up like usual, but it was past one AM on a school night, and back then that was a lot so I tried to sleep. Closing my eyes, tossing and turning, the works. I had just started drifting off when I heard the front door open. I remained calm but immediately found it weird since Brick never showed up this late. The thuds of the individual's feet grew louder as they got closer to my bedroom. I tried to convince myself it wasn't a stranger, especially since they got in with ease, but I knew that was wishful thinking.
They hummed as they opened my door. My dumbass had left it unlocked. I remained on my side, trying to look like I was asleep. They turned on the flashlight of their phone, shining it in my face. It was hard but I stayed still while they traced it over my features. I could tell they were smiling as they clicked their tongue.
“Heh, I knew it was a brat,” they whispered to themselves, pulling tangles out of my hair. Something I struggled not to groan from. They pulled up the hair over my ear and got so close spit got on my ear lobe.
“I know you’re awake kid,” they murmured, putting a blade to my neck. I let them grab my shoulder and move me onto my back, I knew how to fight but I wasn't about to take that big a risk with the position they had me in.
“You think you’re so cool saying you can do better than our guy.” they snickered, kneeling, their flashlight still shining in my face.
“Do you seriously believe that?” they questioned, moving the light away.
“Yeah, I do.” I stood my ground, they might have been intimidating but I wasn't gonna let that stop me from being honest.
“I wouldn't sound like I’m gonna piss myself every time it gets gory. I’m confident I could get better footage too, getting up close is something I’ve fantasized about.”
They clicked their tongue again and ran their finger over the bridge of my nose.
”Well, I know you’re a big fan of what we do, and you’re confidence makes me think you got something to back those claims up, so how’d you like a deal?”
I was surprised by how civil they were being aside from the touching and weapon against my throat.
“What kind of deal?” I asked, for all I knew this guy wanted me to lick their feet or some weird shit like that. They placed a finger underneath my eye, tracing a half moon with their nail.
“You have till this Friday to film a video of you killing an animal and put it on a flash drive that I’ll pick up here. If it impresses me and the crew we’ll hire ya with a handsome salary.” They began, moving their hand down to my cheek.
“But if you don't show, or it doesn't meet our standards, then I’m fucking up one of the parts of your face.” They warned, pinching my skin harshly.
“And if I say no to this deal?”
They put their hand over my mouth, scratching my lips.
“That’s cute, if you say no I’ll just slit your throat.” they grinned.
“Or rip it open with my teeth if you got a preference,” they smirked, before running their tongue across their sharp teeth.
“Okay, since I have no choice I’ll go with it, but I’m telling you now I can give you something way better than what you likely expect of me.” I prefaced, looking into their sunken eyes. They scratched my scalp, including the side of my head that was shaved.
“Good choice, I’ll be back to pick it up and if you're not here I’ll assume you don’t have the video. I genuinely wish you luck, because you’ll need it.” they removed the blade from my neck and walked away. I sat still for a few minutes in the dark, processing what had happened and wondering how they got into my apartment with such ease. I was confident I could blow their sniveling excuse of a cameraman out of the water, but I was worried about the people I was getting caught up with.
Sure, I had been on a lot of gore sites over the years but I was always just watching and occasionally commenting. Compared to most in the scene I wasn't much of a threat. I could defend myself and have contemplated killing for years but I hadn't murdered anyone or worse. Plus, I am part of way too many targeted groups to not be constantly at risk. Teenage, fem-leaning, two-spirit, indigenous kid with trauma? Yeah, I might as well be walking sign screaming “Hate crime me”.
So yeah, there was a lot to worry about. Regardless, I couldn't let that fear hold me back. I had a job to do and a group of sickos to appease. The next morning was rough, I got no sleep cause I’d spent all night brainstorming. I barely mustered the energy to change and drank straight mouthwash instead of brushing my teeth. Slogging onto the bus with drool on my cheek, I went to the back like usual. No one sat there cause, the seats were extra worn down, and I scared off anyone who attempted to with my active, rabies-infected bitch face. That day was different though.
I blanked on his name and where I knew him from, but I recognized his wavy hair and prominent curved nose. He glanced at each seat on the bus, before somehow settling on my area. He tried to give me space but ultimately seated himself beside me after realizing it was the only spot that didn't look like it would give him cancer. I glared at him as I did with everyone, but it didn't phase him.
“You know you could pick anywhere else right?” I murmured. He stared at the floor, then at me.
“I’m aware, but a few months ago I started a mission to sit on every part of this bus, and this is the last place.” he smiled, his lips softly curving at the sides.
“What’s the point of that?”
His mouth moved into a more neutral position, but his eyes kept smiling.
“I just thought it would be neat to see the same place from a bunch of different perspectives.” he took out his phone and snapped a photo from the point of view where he was sitting. Maybe my sleepiness made my bitch face less effective, cause he hadn't shown a hint of fear, which kind of annoyed me.
“That’s cool I guess, but I wouldn't do that if I were you. I’ve done some back here alone that would make your skin crawl.” in hindsight my attempt at unnerving him just made me sound like a pervert, which is probably why he held back laughter. Trying to hide a chuckle by clearing his throat.
“Hey, it's not my business what you do, no matter how Haram it is. It’s your life so that’s between you and whatever you believe in. Just don’t shake hands with me.” he joked, playfully putting his hands up. Strangely, I remembered his name at that moment.
“Oh shit, you’re Abdul! We have art together.” I sat up, haphazardly slamming my hand down on my leg.
“Uh yeah, I’ve seen some of your paintings, they’re pretty cool. I like the way you texture them, I’m trying to work on that.” he complimented, seeming more weirded out by my sudden energy than my accidental insinuation. I felt a little stupid for yelling his name but decided not to dwell on it.
“Thanks, you’re stuff is nice, and you’re good at shading.”
He stretched his arms while thanking me. We talked for a few more minutes, taking jabs at each other throughout. Turns out he was better at being an asshole than his artsy charismatic appearance made me think. The thing setting our insults apart being that you could tell he was a loving person underneath. It was the nicest conversation I had with anyone in a while. Though he could tell I was tired so he quieted down, letting me sleep, waking me when we got to school. We went our separate ways until the last two periods we shared. All that time, I spent my remaining energy plotting how I was going to handle the video. What I’d kill, record with, and how to dispose of the evidence. It was a lot to consider, but through three classes I devised a plan.
I’d find a stray around my apartment complex and take it out in my room. Record it on a portable camera since I broke the ones on my phone, no, I will not be answering how that happened. Then once I had my footage I’d put the body in a trash bag, throw it in the complex’s garbage, and clean the blood off my floor. It didn't seem like Brick would come by so he wasn't a factor I thought I’d have to consider. The plan was almost too easy, but I decided to believe in Occam’s razor. I got so lost in thought that by the time I reached Art, which was my second-to-last period, I didn't process that we were moving seats.
“She called your name,” Abdul reminded me. Our teacher placed us next to each other at our four-person table. The two girls sitting with us were already friends, so I didn't bother to say anything, but I was interested in talking to him more.
“So, what do you think of this assignment?” He shrugged, taking out his sketchbook.
“I’m not that good at drawing people, but the idea of combining two people’s faces into a portrait seems interesting. Any ideas on who you’ll pick?”
“Probably the members of the music duo Brain Tumor, they’re my favorite artists and they both look weird as hell.”
“Wow way to talk about your favorites, if that’s what you say about them I can‘t imagine what you have to say about me.” he joked, pulling up reference pictures.
“First, it’s not an insult, second I don’t have anything to say about you. Brain and Tumor have features and styles that make them stand out. Sure they’re ugly, but it just adds to their visual charm. Hot people are boring, there’s nothing to pick at.” I explained, unzipping my bag.
“Oh, so you’re saying you think I’m hot.”
His comment wasn’t serious but it kind of got to me.
“Shit, that’s not what I meant, I was trying to say you’re boring. All hot people are boring, but not all boring people are hot, okay?” I explained, flipping to a clean page.
“Alright, but if I’m so bland then why talk to me?”
I hesitated, contemplating how much of a dick I was gonna be.
“Because it means you probably need some spice in your life, which I can provide.”
He began sketching a head on his paper.
“I like spices, but I feel like you’re the kind of person to dump a cabinet’s worth onto me.”
I flicked my pencil over to his side of the desk, putting on a mocking grin.
“Aww, you scared I’m gonna get you into trouble?”
He picked up the pencil and started using it, putting his on my side.
“No, ‘cause I’m good at setting boundaries. I’m more concerned that you’ll get annoyed with how unafraid of you I am.”
I stared at him for a moment, I hadn't expected to hear that.
“Jeez, man you didn't have to read me like that.”
He shrugged, observing the red paint from past projects that lay on my pencil.
“It's not hard to figure out, just this morning you were trying to push me away on the bus. Lucky, or unlucky, for you I want you to have a friend and you seem like a fun person.”
“Wait are you saying I have no friends?” I squinted at him.
“Well, do you?”
I didn't answer.
“If your response is silence I suggest you take up my offer.”
I was stunned, to be honest. No one had offered to be my friend since 6th grade, and that didn't last long. Of course, I accepted it, but for the rest of the period, there was an awkwardness in my mind. As pathetic as it sounds I wasn't used to others genuinely enjoying my company like he did. Which was partly by design cause I get joy out of scaring people away, but still. I forgot how it felt to have conversations about normal things like art. He had such a nice smile too, usually when I see a grin I want to slap it off, but I liked his. His voice was also nice, it’s hard to describe what in particular but it was easy on the ears.
Okay, I’m starting to get off-topic. I’ll skip to the important part. Toward the end of class, he started talking about how he was interested in filmmaking and got a portable video camera as a gift at last year’s Eid. He didn't have it on him, but he showed me a picture.
“Heh, that’s funny, I bought the same one a month ago.” I pointed out.
“Yeah, it's a popular model, I’m still getting the hang of it though cause I’m so used to using my phone.”
“Well, maybe I could bring you over to my place or vice versa after school and I can help you out.” I suggested.
He smiled, putting his phone back in his pocket.
“I thought you said you’ve only had it for a month? You know I can always look up tutorials from trained professionals.” he reminded me with a notable smugness that I'd used with him before.
“Well those guys are stuffy and I’m a fast learner.”
He redirected his attention back to his page, picking his pencil up.
“Alright, I suggest we go somewhere public instead. You’re not exactly the kind of person I want to bring home to my parents right away. Plus they always need to meet my friends and their guardians before I hang out at their home.”
I gave an exaggerated sigh, stretching my back.
“Aw man, looks like we can’t get high in my murder pit during our first hangout.”
He didn't respond for a solid few seconds.
“Wait, you do know I'm joking right?”
He shrugged, the smile in his eyes appearing again.
“I mean, one of those things is a little less believable than the other.” he snickered, and I laughed with him.
We set up a time and a date, which is where I screwed myself. He ended up being busy with projects from his other classes and family which just left us with Friday, the same day I had to submit the video. Now, did I tell him I wouldn't be able to make it? No, of course not, because I decided to be stupid and even more overconfident. I said that I’d one hundred percent be able to hang out with him after school like I didn't have a mutilator who was going to drop by my place at an unknown time.
The rest of the day went over fine but that bad timing led me to feel like a dick later. When I got home I was able to write out my plan, even sketching a few specifics of what I’d do. It was more exciting than when I’d been brainstorming, but this is when the gravity of the situation began to set in. When I said I’d fantasized about killings I meant it. I mean my teddy with twenty-five stab wounds should say enough. Regardless this would be the first time real blood was on my hands.
It made me feel powerful, but a little afraid. I’ve heard stories of people thinking that it would be an awesome experience and then feeling like shit. I doubted I’d be one of those people but still. Plus, I didn't exactly trust the guy who gave me this job. There was a good chance that this whole situation was rigged and they’d kill me no matter how good the video was. Or worse turn me into the feds and expose my collection. Honestly, if that happened I’d probably eat a shot to avoid going to jail. Wait, can I say that on this platform? Okay to the mods, that was a joke, I want to live a long life. Ugh, I’m doing a terrible job of staying on track. The point is there was a lot up in the air despite it being a matter of life or death.
I knew I’d go through with it but it was still a lot less straightforward than it initially seemed. I wracked my brain to remember where most of the cats stayed and tried to come up with a good way to lure one without raising suspicion. This also proved harder than first thought because I didn't think to account for the cat man, an old guy who lived alone and fed all the cats in our dingy complex while also housing a few. Knowing how obsessive he was he’d probably notice if one of them disappeared. Then again not all the cats return consistently or at all. It makes more sense that he’d think one of them was run over rather than slaughtered. It was getting late again so I rested my head for a moment, a bad move cause I ended up falling asleep at my desk. Not even changing out of the clothes I’d worn before, I woke up late and barely caught the bus the next morning.
I went to my usual spot but Abdul had already taken it. He patted the area next to it, which he’d covered in a towel, a smart move knowing how nasty it was. People gave me a few dirty looks as normal, which I smiled at. I stretched, my mind slightly less out of it than the previous morning.
“Uh, you do realize that-”
“Yeah, I know I’m wearing the same clothes.”
Abdul looked me up and down, his eyes remaining soft, but with a mix of concern and judgment. He set his backpack down and took off his sweater handing it to me.
“Dude what are you-”
“Look I don't know what led to you not being able to change but I think you should at least have a fresh top.”
I was surprised he was offering me something to wear but I took it.
“Uh, thanks, I’ll change into it later.”
He nodded as I put it in my backpack.
“You know you didn't have to do that.” I reminded him.
“Well there’s a lot of stuff I don’t have to do, but I do it because I want to, and I wanted to help you out.”
He smiled, his face still warmer than an Arizona summer. I got a strange feeling in my chest at that moment, I still can’t tell if it was good or bad.
“Well, thanks, I'll give it back to you tomorrow.”
We talked a little more and he mentioned something that caught my attention.
“Have you heard about all the animals that have been turning up dead?”
My eyes widened with surprise.
“No, I haven't, when did you hear about that?”
He pulled on his long-sleeve shirt.
“My sister said her friend who works at a shelter noticed a bunch of animals were getting adopted by people around the same time, and since then gore videos with them have been showing up. She found out through her co-worker who was emailed it by some random creep.”
I covered my mouth and looked away to hide the smile growing on my face. He had just given me the perfect cover-up without knowing. Now if I killed an animal people had an entire violent ring to connect it to instead of me! I stayed quiet for a minute because I could tell he’d likely see through any phony sad sounds I made.
“Oh wow, that’s awful, do you think they’ll ever find out the people behind it?”
He sighed, running his hand through his wavy hair.
“I hope so, for now, all we can do is pray that no more animals get hurt.”
I couldn't contain my grin as he said that so sincerely like animals and people didn't die constantly and that taking down one group would somehow stop the issue.
“Is there some joke I don’t get?” he furrowed his brow.
“Uh, no, sorry I smile when nervous.”
His gaze softened again, and he didn't press further.
His bringing up the animal killings ended up being the exact push I needed to get my hands dirty. I’d spent the entire day before planning so it was time to put that plan into action. I stole some cat treats that the cat man had laid out and spread them around my apartment which was on the bottom floor. Waiting for one of them to take the bate outside my window was pretty boring but one of them came after a few minutes. A scraggly brown and black cat with a tuft of fur missing on one side of his head. It's messed up but I felt like a little less of an asshole for taking him in since he looked like he was already struggling. I scooped him up and he didn't attempt to fight back.
“Hey there buddy” I waved, feeding him some more food. His eyes had a lot of crust on them, it was kinda gross but I don’t have the right to say with how often I wash my jeans. After a minute or two he let me pet him. I knew making any kind of attachment was bad but I thought it was the right thing to do so he’d fall into a sense of security. I was just about to take him into my room when the door opened.
“Hey, I’m back with groceries!” my shithead cousin announced with two plastic bags in his hands. He looked down to see me with the cat, his eyebrows raising.
“Aw come on, you know we can’t afford a pet.”
He groaned placing the bags on a table and unloading them.
“I know, but he doesn't look like he’s got a lot of life in him I at least want to help him feel better before he kicks the bucket!”
Brick rolled his eyes, putting the cereal box on top of the fridge
“Jeez, did you even think about what diseases he might have? His eyes look puffy what if he has something that can get you sick?”
He had valid concerns which was surprising since he’s usually stupid, but I was still annoyed with him.
“I’m sure he’s fine, I’ll even try to wash him, just please let me hold onto him for a little.”
He folded his arms looking down at us.
“Have you even named him?”
I froze for a second, before using the first thing that came to mind, which ended up being pretty awful knowing my plans.
“Cash cow.” I blurted, awkwardly patting his head.
“Honestly that’s better than what I was expecting. I was sure you’d pick ‘Hellspawn Mcgee’ or something else corny.”
He meant to make fun of me but honestly, I would have named him that if I had more time.
“Ugh, anyway I got those dumb chips you like.”
He then pulled out a bag of the wrong chips.
“Dude those are the wrong ones, this is the third time you’ve mixed up the flavors.”
He threw them at me, scaring the cat slightly.
“Well, I pay for it so you shouldn't be so picky. Anyway, while I was in line I picked up something you might be into.”
He then tossed me a trashy teen magazine. One of my least favorite sorry excuses for an influencer on the cover.
“This is a joke, right?”
I couldn't believe my own adopted brother gave such little shit in my interests.
“I don't know, you decided to start being a girl for real this time so I thought the makeup tips on page ten would help you out.”
I scrunched my face at his comment.
“Dude I’ve been this way for years, just because I started wearing more makeup and dresses doesn't mean I’m more of a girl than when I didn't. I know you won’t get the two-spirit thing but come on.”
He shrugged, seeing me done with me even though he’d just shown up.
“Yeah well hey I’m trying. Anyway, just so you know a friend of mine is coming here Friday.”
My heart stopped.
“Wait why here? You live elsewhere why can’t you assholes go there or their place!”
He slammed his fist on the table.
“Will you shut the fuck up!”
He screamed with a phrase I’d grown numb to.
“I don't know, to be honest, something about wanting to move into this complex and this being a way to scout it out. I’m just letting you know now so you don’t act like a complete freak.”
“Jokes on you I’ll piss in whatever shitty beer you bring just cause you said that!”
I yelled back raising my voice higher than his. He face-palmed before putting the plastic bags in the drawer under the sink.
“Whatever, you and your ketamine-addict-looking cat have fun,” he told me while seating himself on the couch. I picked up the cat and walked into the bathroom to clean it. I closed the door and placed him in the dry tub. Using a small disposable mouthwash cup I got a little bit of water. I hadn't had a pet before so I wasn't sure how to approach the task. I dipped my fingers in the water and carefully pet it while pouring s small bit down his back. Any other cat would fight back but he just made pissed-off noises without doing anything.
I scrapped my old shampoo bottle and kneaded it into his thin fur. His skin was bumpy and dry beneath the hair so scrubbing it was uncomfortable. I made sure to avoid getting soap in its eyes but I did pull away some of the crust on its lids. His pupils were so clouded I was surprised that he could see at all, making me feel even more sure that he would be on its way out with or without me.
After drying him I set him on a beat-up shirt I wore when modifying clothes. He sunk his claws into it a few times, playing with a loose string. I ignored him for the rest of the night, hopping into the shower and changing for bed. His meows woke me up a few times but I tuned it out after a while, reminding myself that he wouldn’t be my cat for long.
The next day was Thursday and there wasn't a second that passed by where the weight of the murder I’d have to commit didn't weigh on me. I seriously shot myself in the foot by taking care of that scruffy, pubic hair pile. I was supposed to be hyped about killing it, after all, I’d dreamed and seen way worse than what I was going to do. Yet once I got home and started setting up I felt grosser with each step. I decided to record it in my bathroom instead of my bedroom so it would be harder to connect to me. I set down a few fabric scraps and a worn-out beach towel, placing it all inside a tub for easier cleanup later.
“Okay, I guess it's time,” I mumbled to myself. I brought the cat in and placed it down, setting up my camera once it was comfortable. I also wore my most generic clothes in addition to a mask, putting my hair in a bun for sanitation. When I saw the flicker of red showing that the camera was on I felt I was dreaming. I smiled, excited that I’d get to live out my violent desires. Yet, when I looked down at its pathetic frame and confused expression those urges left me.
I rationalized what I was doing, reminding myself how many animals die all the time and that I’d been forced into this, but it didn't help much in the end. I won’t get into it but under the pressure of impressing the group Cash Cow didn't go out as fast as I would have liked for a first task. Getting rid of the evidence was especially rough, the textures were pretty nasty, to put it mildly. It was surreal watching the blood go down the tub drain and gradually drip off my hands as I rinsed them. I couldn't conjure a single thought the entire time I cleaned it up.
Whether I was wringing out the clothes or putting the remains in plastic bags, it didn't matter. All I could focus on was the task at hand, with hints of disgust along the way. I ended up finishing at three AM. My hands were wrinkled and shook once I settled. I won’t deny that during the murder I didn't hate it. Slashing into something was fun and it made me feel strong. Still, it wasn't nearly as fulfilling as I expected it to be. Part of it was guilt, but it was mostly disappointment. I’d built it up for years and it wasn't earth shatteringly good or bad.
Overall, I expected to feel more, but it just left me hollow with an uncomfortable itch. There was no way I’d ever be able to see the tub the same way, hell I don’t think I’ll ever use it again. Luckily I almost always shower anyway so it's not too big of a deal. I watched a few horror game videos, trashed everything, changed and went to bed.
My scalp hurt like a bitch the morning since I kept my hair in that stupid bun. Despite getting less sleep than the past two days I held myself together a bit better in the morning. I brushed my teeth, changed, and had some fried bread before getting on the bus. Regardless I looked like complete shit and struggled to slump into my seat.
“Rough night?” Abdul asked
“Uh, yeah.” I quietly responded looking to the floor.
He frowned, looking at me with concern.
“You can talk about it if you're comfortable,” he assured me. I contemplated giving him a thinly veiled metaphor or vague explanation so he'd comfort me but stopped myself before my mouth could run a muck. He wouldn't be able to do much of anything and I don’t like opening up.
“Uhm, thanks but it's something I have to deal with alone.”
He nodded, respecting my boundaries.
“You know, I understand if you can’t hang out today it seems like you have a lot going on.”
I avoided eye contact with him as he spoke. For once I was feeling hints of guilt toward a person. I wanted to spend time with him, but I knew that I wasn't in the state to do that.
“Yeah, I think it’ll have to wait, I’m-” I cut myself off before apologizing. A fact about me that should surprise no one is that I hate apologizing. Even when I do feel kinda bad the act fills me with embarrassment.
“You what?” he asked, his eyes telling me that he knew what I was going to say.
“I’m emotionally not great.” I spat out in an admittedly poor attempt to get out of saying sorry. As always he remained calm but I could tell he saw through me.
“Okay, like I said I understand, whatever it is I hope you feel better.”
I told him thank you and we didn't speak for the rest of the day. At home I changed into more comfortable clothes and brushed my teeth. Unfortunately, I wasn't bouncing back from killing nearly as much as I expected.
“It wasn't even that bad! That thing was on its last legs anyway.” I grumbled to myself, smacking my forehead. I was feeling worse than when I did it which is weird. I ended up spontaneously decorating a ratty tie from the bottom of an accessory drawer to distract myself. It helped me get my mind off things, for a little. I had zero plan, just wanting to make something needlessly complex. Hours that felt like minutes passed and soon it was covered in patches, frills, and beads. I just tried it on when I heard the front door open.
“Man, that shit was wild!” I heard Brick laugh groggily. I didn't have to see or smell him to know he’d gotten lit. I rolled my eyes, closing my bedroom door.
“Hey, who’s there?” his friend asked, seemingly referring to me.
“Oh, that’s my little sis, don’t mind her she’s just on her emo shit!” he joked, which pissed me off for the petty reason that I didn't even listen or dress emo.
“Hey, that’s alright with me, I went through one of those phases,” they responded, their words less slurred than my cousin’s.
I fucked up and forgot to lock it when I closed it so they were able to swing it open, almost smacking my desk.
“Hey emo girl!” they waved as Brick haphazardly pulled them back.
“Okay, man, seriously I think she wants to be left alone.”
The way his friend looked at me made me uncomfortable. Like they’d snap my neck if I pissed them off. They clicked their tongue while stepping through the door frame.
“Alright, but I gotta say calling her an emo is inaccurate, they look like they watch gore and most emos just say they do.” they flashed a sharp toothy grin. At that moment I began to connect the dots.
“Easy, she’ll get pissy with you dude, now come on.” Brick warned tugging their opened button pushed him away. They looked me dead in the eyes.
“I don’t think she minds, in truth, I feel like we’ll have a lot to discuss later.” they smiled again, finally walking back into the living room. A chill ran up my spine when I saw them. The sharp teeth, New York accent, unsettling gaze, that motherfucker was the person who recruited me! They were able to get into my place so easily cause my dumbass cousin probably gave them a spare key or the opportunity to make one, and now they were a room away from me!
I dug my hands into my pillow as I contemplated what to do, no matter what happened next, I knew it was gonna be a rough visit.

In kindergarten (sorry I'm from singapore so we follow British but if im not wrong its like 5-6 years old) I already accepted Christ into my life. But my mom is a "I hate Christians!!" kind of person so I didnt dare to tell her anything. I didn't really have a good relationship with my mom cos to her studies are everything and she made me (until now) think that I'm never good enough. And I was only in primary school thinking my mom doesn't like me. I'm worthless, I want to kms. I made plans to grab the knife from the kitchen, jump off and things like that. Eventually I resulted to scratching my own skin cos I feel most pain when it's right at the nerve uk.
My whole life was until the end of primary school (12) was only to do things to make my mom happy. I wouldn't mention a word about Christianity to her. And when my mom was out at night, me, my dad and my sisters would worship. The moment the door opens, I scramble into the room. This also make me walk far from God and I would curse, swear and stuff. One day in P6, the last year of primary school (12 years old) I thought "Hey, I'm Christian so why am I swearing? Isn't this a sin?" So I stopped cursing. Of course, my mom wouldn't want me going around cursing but I didn't really do it for her, but rather for God. But I still didn't want to tell her about it.
When I graduated from Primary school, in Secondary (Sec) school, I finally got to bring my phone to school (13 years old), but my mom still could track me. Anyways I got to listen to some worship songs my dad sent to me and because I didn't have a music player downloaded and wasn't allowed to download any apps, I would listen through the WhatsApp audio player thing😭😭 on the way home. Usually on Sundays whene my mom isn't home,my dad would bring me to church. Then of course my mom would find out and scold me and this continued until sec 2 (14).
In Sec 3 (15 years old), I had whole control of my phone so I would listen to worship music on the way home. One day in, my dad brought me to church. My mom saw my location and immediately got mad because she knew where my dad's church is and also because my older sister attends service too and my mom was not happy. Since then, I was afraid to go to church. My mom even cornered me one day and made me promise not to go to church or I can forget calling her my mom. I kept crying that night and never dared to go to church (mind that i dont even cry often).
But towards mid year(?) I just decided ok Imma go to church. She can get angry but it won't really stop me. Because I got to know God through worship songs and now I wanted to know him more.
I regularly started praying in the morning on the way to school. Eventually my prayers became a ritual and dry. I felt no emotion and no pull towards God. Only on days when I was really upset/angry then I would feel Him comforting me. One day I really wanted to be the captain in my CCA (it's like after school activities but still part of school programs) and I didn't get it. I was so upset I cried on the way home because I actually put in so much effort into it. Then I became vice captain so ig that counts.
Anyways I became really upset and got frustrated because I didn't prove myself enough. I had so low expectations of myself, got depressed again, but I couldn't vent it out because I couldn't hurt myself anymore after learning my body is a temple of God. So I got super frustrated. I prayed for guidance decided to free up my Saturdays I went to church. Youth services for Secondary school students were on Saturdays and not Sundays so yeah. Towards like October last year I cleared up my Saturdays so I could go more regularly to church, and my mom was defo not happy AT ALL that I went with my own initiative. She ignored me for several weeks and of course I felt lonely and all buy eventually I felt okay because she doesn't even know me sooooo.
I'm still trying to patch up my relationship with her. Honestly, it's so strained I don't know what to do. I've prayed that she would accept Christ everyday but uhh nothing. This doesn't mean I don't believe in God if not this would not exist
One day I was fellowshipping with my dad. Why we did that is because of a long story that would be saved for another day.
But this is the part where it's important
Previously I had dreams and I shared with my dad because he is more experience in deciphering gifts and stuff (I'm sorry if you don't believe in gifts but I do!) And he told me to pray about it because I somehow knew these dreams had meaning and relation to God. A number of dreams had direct inference to God. I did pray about it, and also asked God along these lines; "God, give me guidance. I have strayed and I know. Lord please let me understand, and let me also be close to You. I want to know You, and I know, I haven't read the word. Lord, motivate me to read the scripture, and while reading let me also understand the dreams I have been having my whole life."
I can't remember what I said exactly. The one 9f the church sermons on one week talked about how God is not far, but we are far. And I felt that that was for me. Then one day my dad said to me and my older sister "I don't care you have to download the Bible rn" so I downloaded it but did nothing with it. Finally, one day I was late for work (yes I worked when I was 15 because I actually want an electric guitar) and it was New Year's Eve. My colleague texted me saying she'd pick me up and I said and quote "Isokkk I walk over" (me) ... "Give me your block" (colleague) "Omd tyyy" (me)
Part of me didn't want her to fetch me because it would be troubling her. But I don't know why I waited and was thinking "bruh I could've reached by now but she's late" but I just waited. I was wearing full white that day. And this woman must've thought I was going to church because it was a Sunday morning.
And she asked "Hello, are you going to church?"
I said "oh no no, I have church at night because it's countdown service. (basically the youth services brought our church service from Saturday 4pm to Sunday 8pm because we wanted to countdown service together)"
She said," Oh! So you're Christian! Do you read the Word often?"
I blushed because so many signs and I haven't read a single word. "No," I was so embarrassed
She continued "I used to be a teacher, a lecturer in a University (if im not wrong) There is a website called 7 minutes with God. It was originally created for Harvard students because they were busy and didn't have time to spend time with God." Then I couldn't hear what she said because she was talking so fast. All I knew was she was summarizing the website and encouraged me to read it.
I read it like on January 2nd this year on the way to school ( I'm 16 this year!!! But not 16 yet because as I said, it's not my birthday yet or anytime soon)
I was so inspired that I kept on reading the Word and devoted mornings to not only prayers (that I allowed God to guide me and not just pray for the sake of praying) but also for reading the Word!
See, when I prayed to have motivation to read the Word more, God gave me the sign THREE TIMES which I did not pick up until the 3rd sign, the lady. The first time during the sermon I was like "Yes God, I will do it!" but did nothing. The second time when my dad asked me to download the app version of the Bible, I said "Yes God, this is the sign!" and did not do anything. I got discouraged because my dad thinks I'm funny and wouldn't take my words seriously omd 😭. But the third time, God literally sent a random woman I don't know and told me to read. And I read, praise God!
this is the part where it relates to the meme
Because when I went to the shower I kept laughing because I thought of this meme. I didn't read the word or get touched because it was a coincidence. So coincidence? I think not! It's a miracle ❤️❤️❤️
I finished Mark and the New Testament, I'm currently at John right now.
Just now, after a meeting with my cell group (a small group for easier prayers etc in church), I was listening to worship music, and my grumpy dad was like "GO AND SHOWER" liek chill brou. So I went to the toilet with my headphones on and sat on the floor and just continued listening to worship music. Then my dad sent in the family group chat (just me, my older sister and him, my mom got mad and left) an article about this man called Patrick Lee/Bezalel. He is a local artist faithful in Christ
But reading halfway I kept crying because I was so touched (again I do no lt cry, but I related so much I cried even though nothing had to do with me, but it was like my mother's story where she had a hard of stone towards God) and then my phone went flat 😐 So I risked it and ran out to get my charger but thank God (like actually) my dad didn't scream like he would. Then I sat at the toilet floor and continued reading. Tears kept flowing down my face because Patrick Bezalel's story was such a miracle, and God kept giving him signs that God existed! And removed the layer of stone that surrounded the man's heart and made it soft and open to God again!
After that I continued worshipping God and was listening to worship music (yes in the toilet because I literally have 0 privacy because none of my parents think I need it). I kept crying because the songs were so related. Can you imagine? It went in this order:
1.Presence,Power,Glory 2.Hosanna 3.Promises 4.Holy Forever
Again, coincidence? I THINK NOT. It was so planned, like it was in my playlist for so long and I haven't really thought much about it. Tears kept streaming down and kept going and through sobs I silently prayed to God
"Oh my dear God you have been so so good to me, and so faithful to me Lord. You have guided me, guided my heart and nothing has gone wrong in Your hands Lord. I've been through the turning point I've prayed for. You have sent people, songs and my family members to come after me to open up to You Lord. Lord, I was having a CG (cell group) meeting and something just touched my heart. I am now sitting on the toilet floor and typing this, because Lord you have made a way to touch my heart, guide me through a prayer that came deep down from inside of me Lord, thank You for providing. Thank You God for the miracles You have did in my life, and all that I prayed for has came through Lord. The turning point I prayed for was when that lady had spoken to me about how to set aside time for You and the Word. Lord let me not forget this incident, this turning point, this miracle Lord. Let me put my trust in You Lord, and let You take my hand and let my life be walking next to You faithfully Lord. Lord I pray that I would not waver, and I would not take my eyes away from You. Even when I am crossing and walking toward You on water in the sea, let my eyes be on You, and the works You have done for me, and not be distracted by the worls around me, but to keep my eyes on You diligently Lord. Lord, I am a sinner, and now, I was, for You have sent Jesus Christ, Your Son, to die on the cross for me. Lord, I believe in You and I want to accept You in my life Lord, no matter what situation I am in. Lord, let people around me see Your love, joy, and faithfulness in me, and not let them see the girl I was before. Let them see change, and the love and desire I have for You, Lord. Let them see Your greatness, Your goodness and You. I thank You for everything You have done, and in Jesus's name, I pray that I will walk faithfully alongside You, and will not fail to continuously pray and worship You God. Thank You Lord for the miracles, for this turning point. Thank You God for guiding me, and let me be the branch that bears fruit, and let me be the branch that has life only through Jesus, Who is the vine, Who the reason I live Lord, Who is the reason I have life. Praise the Lord! Amen!"
This is the first time I prayed for so long and every one word was truly from deep down fron the depths of my heart. I couldn't stop crying. I really couldn't and I can't emphasize more that I don't cry often! Either it hurt me so much or that God moved my heart. This time was tears of joy.
I hope this could inspire someone out there, because in another prayer I prayed for those who needed God, even if I didn't know them.
Pray. Pray and ask God to help you seek Him. One thing I learnt from a sermon is the fervency in your prayers. I didn't mean to add this in but I suddenly saw this note I wrote on 25th February.
Title: fervency in prayer Fervency: being excited about something keen on something
At the heart of revival is the spirit of prayer • pray fervently • pray with faith
"But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed"
To be fervent in prayer is to pray tenaciously despite our struggles
Hopefully this helped someone out there, inspired you and is one of your signs to start giving your life to Him! It is actually proven 1 in 3 people are Christians. Isn't our goal to have this faith to reach all four corners of the world? It could sound impossible in the past, but now there is social media, anyone could read and realize "Hey God is actually with me!"

I suddenly got a bit curious, and since I'm on a very slow process of writing an AU fanfic, I wonder what's the biggest misconception about the character. Especially considering the way he is written by some writers.
Small note, I'm a very casual fan, got in DC because of him recently so my knowledge of him is a little limited
I'm adding a bit of how I see him below. Skip it if you want.
He's a street rat, that much is clear. Probably the most consistent thing about him. His father might be a flawed person (maybe, depending on who you are asking) and definitely isn't the best role model, but still trying to care for the family, yeah?
To me, his history of violence comes from his environment. He's used to dealing with fists and violence because of how he lived, and even when he is Robin. Sure they are crime fighting, purpose is a bit different, but you can't tell me that Batman doesn't beat the shit out of them (kinda). Violence became his way of dealing with criminals, even using excessive force, because that way only the worst of the worst could be put down. He probably seen it before when he was living off of the streets, what people do to get what they want. This only fuels his motive for his moral code later.
His death is a turning point in his life, especially after he got resurrected. To me, he is angry because Bruce didn't do anything to Joker. Like the monologue he had during the showdown, it's where his anger is from, it's something that fueled it further. Of course Lazarus Pit might have done something to his mind, but it's basically a ticking bomb, it was bound to explode one way or another. Bruce letting Joker and other villains walk around Gotham and wrecking havoc so easily triggers that part of his brain, almost like a survival instinct and that trauma in his head.
Tbh his relationship with Batman being strained is normal, having moral code clashes will take a while to settle into some form of understanding. Also because they can't get across well enough with words how they feel about each other and the whole thing. I still take the headcanon of him thinking that he is a failure, but I think that at some point, he knows those of the batfamily cares about him, it's just taking him a little to accept it all.
I describe him as, a stray dog. The dog grew up most of its life fighting for itself, learning to bare their fangs and bite to save themselves. But when someone comes over and feeds it and take care of it consistently, they will be incredibly grateful.
I have too much thoughts about him, can't fit it in words much for now.

Hello everyone
Here is why Good Friday is called Good Friday, what sin is and who sinners are.
Why is Good Friday called Good Friday?
In the case you don't know why Good Friday is Good Friday is it's the day that Jesus died for all of humankind’s sin.
What is sin?
Sin is a thing that if done would be in violation of God's law also it is the thing that separates us from God.
Romans 6:23 mentions: “for the wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” there is no such thing as a sin that doesn't result in not going to heaven.
Also, the word death in this context doesn't mean to cease to exist, it is referring to separation from God.
Who are sinners?
all of us! as mentioned in Romans 3:10,23; Isaiah 64:6 and Psalm 51:5. We are sinners because of the fact that Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, this is mentioned in Genesis 3.
What did Jesus go through on the Cross?
He went through unimaginable suffering as he was dying on the cross for our sins. We all deserve what Jesus went through on the cross and we too deserve to pay for our sins in the fires of hell(Psalm 7:11, 9:17; Romans 6:23, Revelation 20:11-15, 21:8; James 2:10; Jude 1:7; 2nd Thessalonians 1:8,9)
Jesus knew that there needed to be a price paid for all of humankind's sin.
the last things that he said before he died was in Luke 23:34 “Father, forgive them for they don't know what they are doing” and in John 19:30 where he said “it is finished”
After He said that, He bowed His head and gave up His spirit, then, he was then buried in a tomb and 3 days later God with the power of the Holy Spirit rose Jesus from the dead, As mentioned in 1st Corinthians 15:6 “After that, he appeared to more than 500 of the brothers and sisters at the same time most of whom are still living, though some have fallen asleep.”
In accordance with 1 Corinthians 15: 1-4, John 3:16,17, and Romans 5:8, He shed His precious blood, dying on the cross for our sins, He was buried, and rose again 3 days later.
Someday He will return, when? That I don't know, only God knows when He is going to return as mentioned in Matthew 24:36 which mentions: “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.” Mark 13:32 has this message as well.
Also, Matthew 24:44 mentions: So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man(Jesus) will come at an hour when you do not expect him” Luke 12:40 carries this message as well.
Furthermore, when Jesus died on the cross he not only paid the price for mankind's sin, he also took the weight of God's Wrath on him as well. He died on the cross so you can be Saved and go to Heaven.
Why did Jesus Christ go through all the suffering that he went through?
It is because he loves you so much, The love He has for you and us all isn't comparable to the love that for instance your parents have for you, John 3:16 Mentions: ”for God so loved the world that he gave his only son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life”
Also, when Jesus Rose again, he defeated Death, Satan, the world, hell and sin. John 15:13 also mentions: “Greater love has no man than this, to lay down one's life for one’s friends”
It is his literal liquid and precious blood that cleanses and washes our sins away(Hebrews 9:12, 24; 12:24; 1st John 1:7; Revelation 1:5, along with Ephesians 1:7, 2:13; Colossians 1:14,20; Hebrews 9:22, 10:19; 1 Peter 1:18&19; 1 John 1:7; Revelation 1:5)
Here are some Important things to know about God, Jesus Christ and Salvation
Jesus was born of a Virgin(Isaiah 7:14 and Matthew 1:23)
He never sinned(2nd Corinthians 5:21 and Hebrews 4: 15,16)
He is the Lord almighty(John 1:1-3,14 John 10:33; Revelation 1:8, 19:13)
The Godhead incarnate(Colossians 2:9 and 1st Timothy 3:16)
The Godhead exists as Three Persons, namely God the father, Jesus Christ the Son, and the Holy Spirit(Colossians 2:2, 9; Matthew 28:19-20; Romans 1:20; Acts 17:29; 2nd John 1:3; Matthew 3:16-17; 1st Timothy 3:16)
Now how salvation works it is through Faith you have salvation and works(Faith = Salvation and works), As mentioned in verses such as Galatians 3:2, 1st Corinthians 1:21, Ephesians 2: 8-9, Romans 4:5, 5:1 and 11:6.
Jesus is the only way to Heaven.
He mentioned in John 14:6 “I am the way and the truth and the life no one comes to the father(God) except for me”
Acts 4:12 also mentions: “ Salvation is found under no one else, for there is no other name given under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.”
Jesus too mentioned in Matthew 9:12-13 “On hearing disk Jesus said it is not the healthy who need a doctor but the sick”(Verse 12) “but go and learn what this means I desire Mercy not sacrifice. For I have not come to call the righteous but sinners”(Verse 13), Luke 5:31 -32 has this message as well
Now, here are some things about Hell
Jesus Christ made it so that you can be saved from hell and so you could be in Heaven with him for eternity.
Who was Hell made for?
Satan and the devils, not for us humans, but the truth is that if someone rejects Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior then there is no other place for them to go.
John 8:24 mentions: “I told you that you would die in your sins; if you do not believe that I am he, you will indeed die in your sins.”,
Luke 13:3 and 5 mentions: “ I tell you, no!, but unless you repent, you too will all perish”
Part of Mark 16:16 states: “.... but, whoever does not believe will be condemned.”
Part of John 3:18 states: “..... but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only son”
Revelation 20:15 states: “Anyone whose name was not found found in the book of life was thrown into the lake of fire”
Amongst the kinds of people listed in Revelation 21:8 include the Unbelievers, these kinds of people along with the others listed there will be thrown into the lake of fire.
Here are some things for people who don't think that Hell is real
And now for the people who don’t think that Hell is real, what if you end up realizing that you are wrong? What if Jesus was telling us the truth? Are you really willing to take that risk and gamble with your soul? Please think about it. Because at some point it will be too late. Also, I’m not intending to scare you with this, I’m wanting to have you saved from hell. Furthermore, you only have one life on earth to decide on where you will go for eternity. Hebrews 9:27 mentions: “Just as people are destined to die once and after that to face judgment”
When is the time to repent?
Now!, is the time to repent of unbelief and believe the Gospel, tomorrow is not guaranteed for anyone.
God is calling us to repent, Acts 17:30 mentions: “ In the past God overlooked such ignorance, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent.”
Acts 3:19 mentions: “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.”,
Acts 2:38 mentions: “Peter replied’ repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit’.
Mark 1:15 mentions,: “The time has come” he said. “The kingdom of God has come near. Repent and Believe the Good news!” Matthew 3:2 also mentions this.
Luke 15:7 mentions: “I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.” Luke 15:10 also has this message as well.
Here are some more salvation related things and a salvation prayer below:
Acts 16:31 Mentions they replied,” believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved you and your household”
John 6:47 mentions: ‘Very truly I tell you, the one who believes has eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 Mentions if you declare with your mouth “Jesus is Lord” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead you will be saved.
Romans 10:13 also mentions for, “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved”.
Also, you must be born again as mentioned in John 3:3, 5, and 7.
Now, here is a prayer to say to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior:
The exact words are not what matters in your prayer to accept him, but what you mean is what matters.
This is the prayer to say:
“Heavenly father, God, I know that I am a sinner in need of your forgiveness, I believe that Jesus Christ died for my sins and you raised him from the dead 3 days later, I want to turn away from my sins and to live a Godly life, Please come into my heart Jesus Christ, I now accept you as my Lord and Savior, I am willing to follow you as Lord of my life from this day forward, please fill me with your Holy Spirit, in Jesus name I pray Amen.”
Lastly, here are some things that you will need to avoid:
1. Abusing God’s grace, it is not a license to sin,
Romans 6:1-2 mention: “What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase?”(Verse 1), “By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?”(Verse 2)
2. Being a lukewarm Christian,
Revelation 3:16 mentions: “ So, because you are lukewarm – neither hot nor cold – I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”
What luke warm would look like for instance is hardly or never doing the following: Praying, Reading your Bible and going to church service. It can also be like this, spending one hour in the church and another hour in the club, one hour praising and another hour swearing, one hour in the light and another in the darkness, one hour with the Lord and another with Satan. Take both the cup of the demons and the cup of the Lord(1st Corinthians 10:21). It’s either God or Satan or either Christ the king or the kingdom of the world.
3. Denying Jesus before others, Matthew 10:33 mentions: “But whoever disowns me before others. I will disown before my Father in Heaven.
4. Depend on your own works to save you and/or be a false follower of Christ. Matthew 7-21 - 23 mentions “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord’, will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me that day, ‘Lord, Lord did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’ Luke 13: 25-27 has a similar message.
Here are some reasons that I share my faith with others are these:

1. I don’t want to spend eternity without them
2. The book of Revelation lists some horrifying things that are to come that I would not wish on anyone, even my worst enemy
3. I don't want them to go to hell.

Here is the doc for the thing that I created as well:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1FMK14LoH0iKIpMkxNNfSDao35QowJZHxkDEtI_Xuk8A/edit?usp=sharing

Long post, sorry.
Be patient with me- My previous dog, I found wandering around a parking lot, so this is my first time purchasing a dog, and I’m afraid I might have encountered a backyard breeder (although it’s hard for me to tell, I’m not good at determining a good breeder from a bad one).
She had her dogs listed on puppies.com, and I wasn’t planning on even getting a dog. I honestly was just scrolling because my old dog passed away this year and I’ve been extremely depressed without him, so looking at pictures of other dogs sometimes cheers me up a little.
Then I stumbled across a puppy that stopped me in my tracks because he looked so similar to my old dog. I contacted the breeder and asked about him. She told me he’s 16 weeks and she really wants to sell him with his brother, but would be willing to to sell just one.
I didn’t know anything about littermate syndrome and thought separating two dogs she said were bonded would cause them anxiety, so I told her I’d get both and put a $500 deposit. She texted me that they are up to date on their shots.
Then, I started doing research on how to potty train two dogs at once, and every single article I read said not to get two puppies from the same litter.
I called back the breeder and expressed my concerns, and told her because of my research, I will only be getting one dog. She got extremely mad and told me she already posted on social media that both have found a home. She then told me that chihuahuas are dogs that need to be with other dogs in the house, and people who have only got one dog from her call her back all the time telling her they wished they had listened and gotten 2. She was throwing so much information at me, telling me how she has sold 2 all the time and not one dog has ever developed littermate syndrome. I told her I’d call her back in the morning with my decision, even though I’d already made up my mind on getting just one. I just wanted to ease the tension.
The next day, I called her back and said I’d only be getting one, and that I was not willing to debate the issue any further because the research was clear. Then, despite me already putting the deposit down, she told me she’s going to call someone else first to see if they’ll take both dogs before she’d give just the one to me.
Later she texted and said the person was not willing, so I could have just the one. To me, this proved she was motivated solely by profit, because if she truly believed that they need to be together, she would’ve never backed off in the span on 24 hours. I proceeded to tell her that I felt disrespected by the way she spoke to me, and threw her logic right back at her, saying that I could l not in good conscience take just the one if all that she said yesterday was true.
Note: I have a speech impediment. It’s very noticeable. And she noticed, and interpreted I guess as me being autistic. She texted me that she could tell I’m on the spectrum (which I’m not at all), and told me “I’m not your enemy. I’m not trying to belittle you. You’re in flight or fight mode.”
Other red flags about this breeder. She has numerous litters. She has puppies that are 15 weeks, 4 weeks, and 3 weeks. She has blue merle chihuahuas. She told me that dogs on medications only live 8-9 years, that heartworm prevention meds kill their livers and kidneys and to not let my vet push any more vaccines on then then the ones they’ve received. She also heavily pushed back when I told her I plan to crate train.
Looking back, I feel bad about myself that I even contacted her to begin with. It was absolutely against my better judgment and a decision made purely on the emotion of missing my old dog. Not going to lie though, I do feel really hurt by the whole thing and it’s made me nervous about ever getting another dog.
Note to add: I check my shelter on a regular basis. Unfortunately 95% of the dogs in the shelter near me are pit bulls or shepherds. Nothing against those breeds, but I’m scared of all big dogs after an attack when I was young and love chihuahuas. I’ve always heard chis and chi mixes are popular at shelters, but I’ve never seen one in mine, and that’s the breed I want

Tier List: https://imgur.com/a/SPm0Fjl
This one hits different. Right from the start, with those ominous vocals giving the whole thing a feeling of foreboding and momentousness. Donald Trump lurking around the stage for his titlecard, even staying onscreen as his titlecard goes away is hilarious and a great visual touch. Then we get Hillary sitting in her debate chair; this battle committing so hard to a location both rappers are present in is pretty unique.
"I've been in this game too long; I'm a public servant! Have been since I met MLK in person!" Serviceable opening on paper, but the guest actor, Kimmy Gatewood, makes it stick out with her performance. Love the intensity of her voice and facial expressions. "I'm a woman of the people; that's for certain. You're a man of the people who don't like turbans!" This is a great line, very accurate, and I love the look on Hillary's face. "I was living in the West Wing while you were professional wrestling. Got skin like Russian dressing from too much Russian investing!" Good lines, in particular I really dig the Russian dressing/Russian investing parallel. Also, while I don't think Kimmy bears a super strong resemblance to Hillary Clinton(the guest actress from Clinton v. Henry VIII was much more on-point) she does look a lot like her as she does the Russian dance in the background. Something about her wide-open smile. "You been going bankrupt since the 90s; if I was in Iran you couldn't find me." Very true on both counts, very solid line. I don't know what more there is to say. Is it gonna be controversial to acknowledge the reality that Trump's gone bankrupt lots of times and probably couldn't point to Iran on a map, even now that he's been president? "You don't care about the job, Trump, you just think the desk is shiny." I think it's accurate that Trump really only cares about the prestige, but this still seems like a pretty weak attack. Hell, you could argue the vast majority of presidential candidates care more about the prestige than actually doing anything. "I said that I respect your children but that wasn't quite right, yo! Looking like some extras on American Psycho!" This line is pretty fucking great. I didn't get it when this battle first released, but I've seen American Psycho more recently, and comparing the Trump kids to the useless trust fund posers surrounding Patrick Bateman is hilarious. The hyper-aggressive hip thrusting Hillary's doing is also a great visual. For the most part this portrayal doesn't resemble Hillary much, but I think there's some truth in how she's portrayed as being very try-hard here. "First name is Hillary, middle name Rodham, last name is Clinton, and lyrics I got 'em! You fire celebrities on The Apprentice, motha fucka I fire Bin Laden! (Crack!) cough" Being tryhard again. The lines are pretty good, the flow is pretty good. The reference to her coughing is a fun touch. "How do I say this? You're racist! Ooh, you must get so pissed that your hands are too small to stop and frisk!" The asking/answering of that question at the beginning is really funny, and I like the way they worked Trump's small hands into this attack on him for being racist. "So you use your fingers to touch chicks. (She's only 12 years old.) That's enough, shit! (But she's married, sir.) Just gotta get pushy. (That's your daughter.) Well, grab her by the pussy!" One of the highlights of the battle, love the way they worked in the secret service agent here. Pointing out Trump being a creep at child beauty pageants and towards Ivanka are great lines of attack. "That's assault, brotha! Don't tell me the victim's at fault, sucka! You don't know shit about steaks! Yucka! But the ones on the 8th are great! Motha fucka!" Really fun delivery, good attacks, I like that they threw the Trump Steaks jab in between the more serious sentiments. I don't know what the fuck is going on with the background in this section, though they're really going hard on the tryhardness of Hillary. "Better save the date; I'm gonna rock the vote! Bad bitch on the scene like Murder, She Wrote!" Hillary trying to compare herself to that character is pretty cringe, as is highlighted by her attempting to dab with the biggest "look, aren't I cool, kids?!" look on her face. Real "Pokemon Go to the polls" moment. "So go ahead, Donald, let me see you flow. I brought Michelle's speech; borrow some quotes!" It's a pretty great line, though this line is moreso an attack at Melania than Trump himself; she should have ended with a more Trump-focused attack.
"Let me just say I respect all females. But your rhymes are trash; put 'em next to your emails." The first line is funny in how flagrantly untrue it is, the second line is just plain funny. Good opener. "Our country's in crisis. Who wants to vote for the mother of ISIS? That might not be exactly true, but I don't do politeness." Trump talks out of his ass and lies a lot, yes. "(Believe me!) You wanna talk about misogyny? Your Bill's worse than Cosby! He left a mess on that dress like you left in Benghazi!" The comparison of the rapist Bills is a great line, and I'm not sure whether the whole Benghazi thing was actually something that was Hillary's fault or just a Fox News talking head talking point, but it's a good line regardless. Also by this point it's clear that Lloid's Trump impression is on-point, much better than Peter's. "(Terrible!) You wanna break the glass ceiling, Hillary, I sense it. But the only crack you'll find is my ass pressed against it." The gesturing Lloid is doing during the "I sense it" line is fucking hilarious. The second line is also pretty funny, and did turn out to be true. "The numbers are in and I'm right on your tail. You don't have the stamina, baby, you're frail! This will be just like '08 when you fail! But Trump will appoint you to jail!" Fun parallel to Hillary's "First name is Hillary" segment from before going on here. The lines themselves are fine, nothing amazing. The second-to-last one turned out to be true, the last one did not. "How do I say this? You're a 2. And you almost lost the primary to a socialist Jew!" It's pretty funny how Trump mimics Hillary's "How do I say this?" bit, and "you're a 2" is such a simple but funny jab. He's got a point that Hillary was so weak a candidate that Bernie Sanders came outta nowhere and was able to put up a serious competition in a race that was supposed to have no real competition for her. "What do the American people gotta yankee doodle doo, to get it through your fat face, that they're just not that into you?!" The use of 'yankee doodle doo' is funny and he's got a real point that Hillary needs to accept she's very unpopular, though that 'fat face' line is such a pot calling the kettle black moment. No doubt intended as such. "They want a strong male leader who can stand up to China! Not a crooked, little, wishy-washy bleeding heart vagina!" These lines, of course, exist purely to point out that Trump is a giant sexist. The "China, China, China... bloody vagina!" in the background is a very funny touch. Little bits like that just add so much to this battle. "I'm gonna run these streets like I run my casinos; more police and less Latinos!" These lines, of course, exist purely to point out that Trump is a giant racist. "While you bury us in debt buying poor people socks, I'll create jobs, tearing down mosques!" Trump is against programs that help the impoverished and hates Muslims. "Then I'll use all the best rocks from the site to build a wall, dip it in gold and make Mexico pay for it all!" The thing Lloid does with his eyes as he smiles when he says "build a wall" is just... SO Trumpian. This really is one of the greatest Trump impressions I've ever seen, Lloid did an amazing job. As for the line... Trump says he's gonna build a wall. He built a partial wall. A partial, really unimpressive wall. "I'll make this country great again! We'll all be living large! And I'll tell Congress you're fired, and put Charles in charge!" Trump's slogan is MAGA and Charles in Charge was a TV show whose main actor is a Trump supporter. Also apparently there was a Supreme Court judge named Charles Trump once wanted nominated. Alright. "'Cause this whole system's rigged! And we all know the riggers! For the last eight years this country's been run by- (CAW!)" The point of this line is that Trump is a giant racist. I like the touch that the crowd is cheering wildly for Trump while Hillary looks disturbed in the background.
Then Lincoln comes soaring in on an eagle, as he did in Obama v. Romney. "Are you fucking kidding me with this blah blah blah? I've half a mind to feed you both to my oversized - (CAW!)" The use of 'CAW!' as a censor is amusing. "I've heard more thoughtful discussion up in TMZ! You two got brother blocking brother on their Facebook feed!" This isn't fun anymore, it's just real. "I'm so sick and tired of this ridiculous shit! If this is the best my party gets, then my party should quit!" The Republican Party is a nightmare and Lincoln would be ashamed of it today, is what is being said. "I'm sorry, did I say something that you found funny? Wipe that creepy-ass smile off your face and beat this dummy!" Clinton is a shitty politician who didn't take Trump seriously enough, and she comes across as cold and inhuman. And in case you somehow failed to pick up on it before, ERB makes clear here their endorsement for which candidate to vote for. "And if she does win the White House, be a man and hold the door. Don't get your fans stirred up in some sorta Twitter civil war!" Too real, especially after January 6th. "Here's an equal opportunity smack down in the sequel! That's of the people, by the people, for the people, eagle!" Some people have debated whether Lincoln slapped Trump twice in place of slapping Clinton at all because he's a gentleman and wouldn't hit a woman, or because ERB favors Clinton over Trump. The latter is definitely true, but the former is also probably true. So... both! Then Lincoln yells "Eagle!" and fucks off.
Let's talk about bias. There's two camps of people I've seen in discussions about certain ERB battles, especially this one, and they both irk me. So let's address both of them.
First off: YES, ERB is biased against Trump. And are biased against Republicans generally, and much more sympathetic to the Democrats. They've made that completely obvious from the beginning. And you know what? That's totally fine! They're right to be biased against them! But for some reason, some people in the fanbase can't just admit that. For some reason, there's a lot of people in the fanbase who will bend over backwards trying to explain how it's actually totally unbiased(false) and they attack both sides equally(false) and people complaining are being salty(true). But if you think ERB is unbiased, then society has failed you, because you are a woeful media illiterate. They're screaming Vote for Hillary, Don't Let Trump Win! at you and somehow you haven't managed to decipher what they're saying. I hope for your sake you're, like, twelve years old if you actually think they're unbiased. Here's an important lesson for you to learn as you grow up: 'biased' does not equate to 'bad'! For example, you SHOULD be 'biased' against Hitler! If you look at someone like Hitler and compare him to someone like MLK and treat them as equally valid figures whose ideas are both worthy of consideration, then you're at best a useful idiot and at worst a Nazi apologist! Stop feeling like you have to defend ERB's honor by feverishly denying any claims of bias!
But even worse than those jokers are the fuckers who love to bitch about how ERB has gotten "too political" or "too woke" nowadays. NEWSFLASH, DUMBASS: the very FIRST battle was John Lennon vs Bill O'Reilly, and Bill O'Reilly literally says "Because I'm evil! Heart blacker than Don Cheadle!" Their very foundation as a series is shitting on Republicans! They didn't suddenly 'go woke' just because they stopped doing gay jokes and shat on Trump even more explicitly than they already did to Romney.
Anyway, I've got mixed feelings about this battle. The 'mixed' part of those feelings come from how heavy it is; I have to be in a certain mood to want to listen to this, and most times I see this pop up in my playlist I just skip on to the next one. It's uncomfortable. It's real. Maybe a little too real. But then again, maybe they were right to take it so seriously. It's still a great battle, even if it can be a little hard to come back to. The only big issue I have with it is that Lincoln coming in at the end is kind of a drag. It was funny the first time; this doesn't recapture the magic. He doesn't really have any great lines either. I tend to stop listening by the time he comes in. But besides that, this battle has an amazing instrumental track, great visuals, peak performances from both Lloid and Kimmy, and good, sometimes great, writing.
I used to think Trump won this battle despite always having been anti-Trump. Revisiting it now, I'm not sure why I thought that. Maybe it was because his part was just so entertaining, even moreso than Hillary's. Maybe it's because I, like many others, harbor a strong resentment and bitterness towards Hillary Clinton(muh Bernie) that would lead me to not be entirely honest about her performance here. Maybe it's just because that hardly anybody said Clinton won back in the day; Trump had either a majority or a clear plural majority of votes in polls, then Lincoln with a fair amount, then Clinton with a small fraction. Now I see that that is utter bullshit. The only reason anybody votes for Lincoln is either because of the Last Word Effect or because they want to be centrists about it and not side with either candidate; even if you could argue he was the best part of Obama v. Romney, here his verse falls well short of both Clinton and Trump's. On the question of Clinton v. Trump... I can kind of see how someone might think Trump won on account of how hilarious he was, but a ton of his stuff just makes himself look bad, and if we're being honest I think Clinton had better burns and more substantive lines of attack. I say Clinton>Trump>Lincoln.
inb4 someone says I got "too political" in my presidential election battle analysis

hey y'all. so, fair warning, this is prolly gonna be a pretty long post knowing myself, and frankly it's prolly gonna get lost in the sauce as well but I think I just kinda needed to vent a bit. I didn't wanna post this on LowSodium cuz even though this post is relatively low sodium, I frankly just wanted to bring it to all of you guys. I haven't had the best rep in this server for my takes either, but...
this is different. this is more about who we are, as people, not as guardians.
for a bit of context, I'd been passively fostering a small community in the hopes that we could be really tight knit. it all started one day when I was kinda really happy. I'd just done one of the coolest things I'd found realistic for myself, a solo flawless Duality run, and my interest in the game, instead of waning as it had been, almost just fully recharged. I went into a sherpa run, just like in the good old days, and found a really cool set of people. the kind of people that really felt like we could be friends. over the course of several months, we formed into a group chat, and eventually into a server, that, despite my expectations, happened to have some pretty active people. and while some fell off, probably not even playing Destiny anymore, some stayed. sometimes even more than enough for a raid. this had exceeded almost all of my expectations, and I frankly didn't think it would ever have been possible to create something like this.
I had wanted this for ages, ever since my first ever day 1 (all the way back at Root of Nightmares). I remember going into a group where I had no idea what to expect, only to get a seemingly easy day 1 dream shattered by tragic morale and elitists who, in my opinion, were the reason why we couldn't make as much progress as we could. and since that day, I vowed to create a community that wouldn't ever have this problem. one that had... not teammates, but friends. one that wouldn't ever have an air of intimidation, about someone complaining about someone else's DPS, about someone failing a mechanic. one where we could enjoy the game as much as I do.
a week before Pantheon, we'd found a really decent set of people. most of them who I've invited from my past sherpas, some that a couple of the members had found from their own LFG's, some from even my old server, or friends from another completely non-Destiny server. we'd found our people.
and day 1 came. we spent 8 hours that day, working on Atraks Sovereign. longer than I've ever spent in any raid ever. but you know what? we did it. we pushed through, despite all of the hardships and failures, we pushed through. as comrades, as helldivers, as a fireteam. I knew it would only get harder. I knew that we would face harder challenges. but I knew that we would do it together.
as week 2 approached, we planned, we learned, we found strats, and we conquered our clear and spent only about 4 hours that one day, striking down Oryx Exalted. I got literally my first ever Zaouli's, with an amazing roll by my standards. we were happy, we did it.
but no good thing could last. as we wound up for week 3, something felt different. we had struggled only a little bit more than before, yet there was that air... that feeling of something iffy. I'd brushed it off at first, just continuing and trying our best. but as our attempts continued on, after merely an hour and some spent on Golgoroth, I'd found half of our fireteam disconnected. but not only just half, but the half that was here, the entire time. ever since week 1, ever since 3 months ago when the server had barely been founded. the OG, so to speak. me and the remaining guardians simply hopped into Onslaught, wondering what could've happened as it didn't seem that bad. and over the coming days, I'd found out that I was the one responsible. I was the one stubbornly running an arc hunter build that I personally thought would make me comfortable, while also aligning with the arc surge, against the will of one of our members. but, whether I was wrong or whether I was right, it didn't matter. I was the reason why he had left and taken everyone w/, and not only this, but I was hit with the one thing that I had wanted to shelter everyone else from. that elitism, that micromanagement, the ordering of people around. it hurt.
over the coming days, we'd eventually made up, I'd made concessions and compromises. but it didn't really feel the same. now, as the week of -15 looms to a close, I've found these very people, the people that had been with the server from the start, inviting me to ditch any of the people that had wanted to run Pantheon in the server; to work with LFG's. I couldn't do this. having such a big event be absolutely let down, to probably be carried through in 2 hours or less by people who had hyperoptimized every single little thing, while abandoning the community that I fostered. I couldn't.
I talked with my friends, some of the closer Destiny friends that I'd had, who I had known for longer, just never really linked up with, only to find that the tightest knit communities that I had seen had also been suffering, the failures weighing down on each other and pitting us against each other.
what did Pantheon do to us? how did this happen... was the challenge so steep? or were our friendships simply too weak? time can only tell, but in the meanwhile, we just gotta keep going.
thanks for reading y'all. this might've seemed a tad overdramatic, and while I won't deny that it was, I can certainly promise that I'm not overreacting. Destiny, the friends I've seen, the things I've done, while I'd not like to admit it, has been my home for the past 2 odd years. and this... this just hurts... a little.
but, we must stay ever vigilant. Stay strong, Guardians.

The trinity is one of the main topics the INC focuses on, and in every argument/debate i've seen is nothing but a misrepresentation of what Christians (Catholics, Orthodox, and Protestants) believe in the Trinity. This thread is for this purpose of denouncing the lies of the INC in regards to this topic.
I will not give everything off in one post so that people will not get turned off with being introduced to a wall of text so as this thread progresses, more content will drop in.

1) Is the word Trinity in the Bible?

Answer is no. However, this is not a good argument because the word "Bible" and "Epistles" are not found in scripture either. These are words were later made to give a name for certain things taught in the Bible. "Epistle" was made to give a name to all of paul's letters, the word "Bible" was made to give a word for the compiled OT and NT. Likewise, the word "Trinity" was made to have a word for the 3 different persons of God described in the bible.
In the Bible, it was called "the Godhead" Colossians 2:9-10 - In him dwells the fullness of the Godhead.

1. The word "God" in hebrew is Elohim. In one of James_Readme's threads, I asked him as to what the hebrew word for God is, which he chose not respond to. Here is the reason why, if you read the book of Isaiah, you'll see a class of angels such as Cherub and Cherubim, the difference between the two is that Cherub is singular while Cherubim is plural. Same thing with Seraph and Seraphim. In hebrew, anything that ends with an IM is masculine plural, there ElohIM is plural. God is a plural word.

Genesis 1:26 God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness

2) Isaiah 45:5

I am the LORD, and there is no other; apart from me there is no God.
When the INC uses this verse, they are misrepresenting and being dishonest as to what we believe the Trinity to be. We believe the Trinity is 1 God.
Matt 28:19: baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. It says "Name" (singular) not "Names"
John 10:30, I and the Father are one.
John 1:1 - The Word was with God and the Word was God
The Bible shows that there is only 1 God, but it describes 3 different essences of this one God. Therefore since the Bible teaches the Father, Son, and HS to be one God then obvious Isaiah 45:5 is applicable (has always been applicable) to the triune God. Again, go back to the hebrew word for God being "ElohIM".

3) Jesus says the Father is my God

John 20:17 - ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’”
This is a complicated one, because it will require to understand the nature of Jesus. Being God and Man. When Jesus became man, he took our nature and became submissive to the Father
Hebrews 2:9 - What we do see is Jesus, *who for a little while was given a position 'a little lower than the angels'
Yes, Jesus called the Father God, and likewise God the Father calls Jesus God.
Hebrews 1: 8 - But of the Son he says, “Your throne, O God, is forever and ever.....
Now, the INC posted a "rebuttal" to this https://incmedia.org/does-hebrews-18-call-jesus-god/

Brother Bob: So dear friends, who is this prophecy all about? In Hebrews 1:8, Apostle Paul was simply quoting this: Psalm 45:6-7, “to the Son He says ‘Your throne, O God**,**” and you know, it’s in this portion of the verse is why people draw the conclusion and think that God is calling Jesus God. But, let’s go back again to Hebrews 1:8 and include verse 9 with it this time, because that is so very important to do, it reads this way, including verse 9:

This is a poor rebuttal.
First, this Bob guy doesn't explain is what/who that Psalms 45 prophecy is about. It's a Messianic Prophecy, so even back then in Psalms Jesus is already being called God. This INC minister is not answering as to who is that "God" and why is the Father using that prophecy in reference to the son.

Now, False preachers, they will only read verse 8, leave out verse 9, You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness; Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You With the oil of gladness more than Your companions.”
[Hebrews 1:8-9 New King James Version]
Brother Bob: So dear friends, it is made clear here in verse 9, that to the son, whom God is referring to, is one who has a God. The true God does not have another God, or else there would be two Gods. Hebrews 1:8-9 is simply, then, an important prophecy about the Son who was anointed with the oil of gladness, and who hates lawlessness and loves righteousness.

Verse 9 just proves our point. This isn't implying "another God" but both the Father and the Son to be God. Next, this guy leaves out v10-13 that helps affirm that this entire chapter is showing the Father and Son to be equally 1 God.
V10: HE (God) ALSO SAYS: In the beginning, Lord, you laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the work of your hands.
Who is the Father referring to as Lord, who laid the foundations of the earth?
then in v13, “Sit at my right hand, until I make your enemies, a footstool for your feet" This is quoting Psalm 110:1, which begins with "and the Lord said to my Lord, sit at my right hand..." Who is this Lord?
Another reason why this Bob person is wrong is because even the muslims will say Hebrews 1 has the Father calling Jesus God. If you go to the Muslim sub and ask them what do they think of Paul, they will bash him for being a false prophet. The muslims think Paul is the guy who started the belief of the trinity and they use this verse as an example of the "corruption" made by Paul . That is why they reject the NT, that is why they claim the Quran was sent by God --because the NT was corrupted. So even they know what the actual message of this chapter is.

The INC will play games as much as they want, but in the end they have to prove why their church has credibility. They are a church made by filipinos and believed by only filipinos, and they are not only contending with 2000 years of christian teachings but they are basing their stance on a bunch of books that were compiled and translated by churches they consider as "false teachers".
I'll leave this for now, there are other things such as Matthew 24:36 and other verses which i will get through some other time.

You know like the terrible Elton John remixes and the Eiffel 65 I'm Blue copy? I'm all for sampling if the song is different enough, but there has been a recent trend of keeping old songs being exactly the same but replacing the singer and the lyrics. Of course this isn't a brand new trend but it's been much more common recently. Anyway, both songs in the song I'm looking for had a female singer that's all I really remember. At first when looking back at melon's of the examples, I thought it could've been Right Round by Flo Rida but that song is way too old to have played on pop radio and I'm pretty certain it was just a female singer and didn't have that pseudorap or whatever he's doing. Whatever that fake pop song rap is called where the beat behind it is just clapping or a generic drum beat cuz it aint rap and it's not singing and it's definitely not good.
Edit: Found it. I was wrong on a few aspects apparently - it DOES have terrible anti-rap and it was from the 90s not the 80s. Also apparently David Guetta - the same person responsible for "im good and im freaking alright" is the one to blame for this one as well. It's called Baby Don't Hurt Me

Sorry if it sounds awkward, English is not my first language.
Well, I guess I've been thinking about this for a while. I am currently a high-school student, but I will graduate soon. I started following Christianity about a two and a half years ago, going through a rough patch. I was very socially isolated, but I sort of felt like Jesus spoke to me through the thoughts I'd have about what comes after death basically, and that even someone like me, whom was "forgotten" by the world had a place where I truly belonged with him. That idea gave me the hope I needed to carry on for a while. John 14:3 and Psalms 73:25 remain verses I think about every day. But I guess over time I began to have a lot more trouble with my day-to-day life such as losing interest in a lot of things I used to like, being in a strained relationship with my family, fighting the resurgence of mental illness and maintaining health, ect. While The world progressed around me, I stagnated. I feel confused with what God had intended for me to do. In fact, I think I have never felt so uncertain about things in my life before.
I am not interested in romantic relationships or earning a lot of money, but rather a pointer or a nudge In the direction that God wants me to go in. So, there seems to be a persistent empty feeling in my chest about all this. On one hand, I am familiar with verses that talk about God who will be your guide, and I try to be still be still and let him fight for me. But on the other hand, what if God has shown me parts of what he wants me to do already, but I am unknowingly running away from it? I feel very conflicted and anxious when I think about if what I love to do/the desires of my own heart are truly aligned with what God wants. I don't have any notable talents, nor do I consider myself an ambitious person, but I do not want to walk away from Jesus in any sense, and I feel as if I continue to pursue those things, it would be like a rebellion while I am under the illusion that I am doing his will for me.
Of course, I am aware that God typically does not answer in specific terms, for the first time in my walk, I have started to doubt if I ever received the holy spirit at all. Have I committed idolatry in the sense that I became a christian because of the idea of one day being in a place I belonged beyond this world rather than for God Himself? I've been seeking counsel in my fellow believers as of late, but Im still not very sure if I ever knew him in the first place. I will make an effort to try and continue to pray and love others regardless.

Hi there,
So in Microtech, unverified FPS DC missions are given out by Bit Zeros.
In Hurston, unverified FPS DC missions are given out by Tar Pits.
When you hit Bit Zero missions ( in MT ) you get rep with them.
When you hit Tar Pits missions ( in Hurston ) you DO NOT get rep with them ( tar pits )
Is this intentional or a bug ?
Also :
We have been doing almost non stop DC missions in MT.
The result of this is that we have already 100% affinity with Bit Zeros and went from lvl 1 to lvl 3 in rep ( there are 6 levels ) and its a slow grind.
No issues with this.
Once we got to lvl 2, we unlocked two more missions on Bit Zeros/unverified
Now at lvl 3, we have no new missions.
Bug or ?
Missions so far (MT)
destroy server on lobby area destroy fuel tanks get drug package from inside and drop it somewhere else permanente delete - destroy 10 guys, where 2 are bosses, on the outside (we got this missions upon reaching lvl 2 rep ) destroy relays outside
No new missions on lvl 3 rep ? Will be there at lvl 4 ?
Also is ther any way to get lawfull missions ( not unverified ) on DCs , fps wise ? I know there is the mission persons one and some deliveries - anything else? and do we have to pump rep with who to access them ?
Best regards and thank you,
GP

Brothers, sisters, visitors especially, Thank you all for opening this. It’s my prayer that you will read through all of this and remember who we are in Christ, especially in these days.
I was online the other day, and was just glancing over a thread and noticed out of no where, people were arguing about the topic of God. Just, general topic, you know how things go online.
There was one person who said, “love is the answer. It’s why Jesus came and to die for us. It’s all about loving one another.” To which I thought, ah yes that’s the greatest commandment of all. But she really didn’t say anything else of value. Yes, love, the greatest fruit of the spirit, the great commandment is love one another, the best part of living with others may be to show their love to each other. But she kind of hid behind saying that and nothing else.
Another was quoting verbatim the KJV versions of some of our greatest verses, and nothing else. Just kind of saying the words, no connection. It brought me back to Paul who reminds us to be tasteful in our interactions with nonbelievers so that we might be heard in a genuine way, and possibly plant the seeds of salvation.
Another, nonbeliever, was throwing out his concerns on why or why not they weren’t participating in the conversation of faith at all.
.
I want to talk about the fundamentals of our belief. As followers of Jesus, children of God, vessels of the Holy Spirit, there should be the understanding of why we believe without the answer having anything to do with tradition, or culture. We should have a basic understanding as to why the gospel is truth. We cannot be the foundation who was tossed away because of the wind. Spiritually, our wisdom must be current, and in tune with the Holy Spirit, and the fundamentals. Otherwise, we choose our own wisdom over the truth and what? God gives us to our own wisdoms leading us to foolishness? A basic understanding and capability to answer basic questions of our faith is just as important if not more than our works. Faith without works is dead, but an eager tongue with no wisdom will lead to failure and destruction.
If you’re still reading this with open ears and open eyes, I thank you. I am only the vessel of this truth and have been given the discernment to decipher it, and the ability to write it.
1) ((This is the one relevant to Gods might, wonder, creativity)): God created all things, with His word. The first 5 days of creation He finished and he said “it was good”, (Genesis 1). In the beginning of all of it, was His word, and everything that is was created by Him and nothing was created without Him, (John 1). God, with his spirit, created all.
2) ((This one is relevant to humankind being favored and loved by God)): God created man on the 6th day and he calls it “very good”. The only time in this story of creation where something is very good, not just good. Sees man is alone and says that is not good. Puts him in a deep sleep, takes his side (‘selah,’ also used in the Hebrew to describe the “side of the mountain, the “side of the ark of the covenant) and makes woman, as an ally in this life.
3) ((This one is relevant to Jesus’ role)): Adam and Eve lived in Eden, and God walked amongst them. Man was meant to be with God, and worship Him and love Him. God had created us for that andd the way we were able to was by the garden. Eden was our bridge between God and earth where we were mean to live freely, perfectly and with God. The bridge to God was broken, from the fall, through disobedience and from the moment of the fall God foretells of another way back to Him.
We all know the line. “I will send the seed of a woman to crush the head of the serpent…”— which on its own one might ask why? The answer is because this is the moment death enters. From the fall and on, we were no longer bridged to spiritual life or God at all. We were trapped on this side of existence away from spiritual life, God, Eden. So it HAD to be the seed of the woman. It had to be in our realm of reality, we were no longer on that side of reality.
Next, “the serpent will wound the heel”, representing that the man will suffer. It will be a wound.
It’s a rule of creation, all life needs blood to live. And since we have forfeited our spiritual life in Eden where we’re meant to be, to have physical life, we have no blood to live and we are dead spiritually without believing in the fact that the blood of Christ replaces ours. Think back to the creation story: “God breathed life into adam…” it was the ‘ruach’, or the spirit, that livened adam whom was formed from the ‘adama’, or the ground, and had his ‘dam’, or blood, to keep him alive. God, who is one with His Word, is the giver of life, and is the Truth.
Foreshadowed by Moses, unbeknownst to him, recorded in Numbers concerning the bronze snake, & the rock and the water (both times, first the strike representing the crucifixion and second representing the spoken confirmation—where Moses failed btw).
And so Jesus comes to fulfill that prophetic word from God. A) come to our plane of reality because we fell off His B) crush the head of Satan/serpent—destroying the power of death, and the power of the fall. C) dying—it is the blood that gives life, without blood we cannot live. D) giving us the Holy Spirit—when God gave Adam blood to live, He also gave him His ‘ruach’ to breathe. And so it is the exact same thing as now, with clean blood from Jesus to live AND the Spirit, or ‘ruach’, to breathe.
Jesus says “I AM the way” for this reason. He is the bridge from humanity to God, just like Eden.
Amen, I thank you father for your holy wisdom and I pray that someone who you needed to understand the details closely finally sees. I pray your will be done in all things. Amen.

KANSAS CITY, Kan. (KCTV) - A woman bitten by a dog in KCK’s Strawberry Hill neighborhood calls roaming dogs a growing problem and is raising her voice to city leaders.
On the evening of Sunday, May 5, Jesse Molina was taking a walk with her husband and her dog Lucy. They saw another dog wandering the street unsupervised. In her three years living there, she’s seen numerous dogs roaming free. She kept a watchful eye but the dog seemed to be minding its own business. Then suddenly, the dog darted at her and Lucy. The dog, which she described as a pit bull and police described as a pit mix, gave them no warning. No bared teeth, no growling. Just attacked out of the blue, unprovoked.
“It took all three of us fighting this dog off and I’ve never, I’ve seen dog fights and this is this was not, this was, it was a monster,” Molina said, clearly still so distraught that she had trouble finding words to describe the moment.
THE ATTACK
She said the dog lunged at Lucy’s throat. Lucy has stitches and staples in various places. Molina has a bandage on her wrist. I photo she took in the hospital shows a deep, gaping puncture wound. She began crying as she described the day and her fear for others.
“It just fluctuates between grief, sadness, profound depression,” Molina said of her emotional state. “And I think gratitude because we’re still alive.” She’s been writing to elected officials. She wants something done to prevent this from happening to anyone else. She thanked her Strawberry Hill community of neighbors with intervening to help. She praised the police department’s animal services unit officer who responded and started an investigation. And she wondered what the solution could be. More officers for enforcement? Stricter laws? More education?
WHAT’S BEING DONE
KCK police said they are already being aggressive with enforcement and education. Police Department spokeswoman Nancy Chartrand researched data on complaints and citations in 2022 and 2023, the most recent years available for year-end reports. Chartrand said the department had a 26% increase in calls about dogs off-leash in 2023 than the previous year. In that same time, they had a 62% increase in the number of citations issued.
A municipal court judge makes the final call, Chartrand said, on what fines and orders to give for violations of several ordinances already on the books.
Ordinances require dogs to be registered, spayed or neutered, vaccinated and kept on a leash. There is an ordinance related to allowing a dog to reasonably place a person in fear for their safety. All are misdemeanors. There is a process for having a dog declared dangerous and requiring additional measures from the dog’s owner.
What they don’t include is automatically euthanizing a dog after a bite. The current steps involve a 10-day quarantine. If someone admits to being the dog’s owner, they get the dog back pending court. In court, a judge decides on fines and restrictions. If no one admits to owning the dog, the dog is put down because the shelter can’t responsibly adopt out a dog with a bite history.
BREED BANS Molina said it’s not the fact that she and Lucy were attacked by a dog in general but the extreme nature of the attack, which she attributes to the breed.
Bans on specific breeds have fallen out of favor in recent years under pressure from residents who consider them arbitrary, discriminatory, and ineffective. Animal rescue groups have argued against them. The ASPCA has said, “Breed-specific legislation, or BSL, is the blanket term for laws that either restrict or ban certain dog breeds in a misguided effort to decrease dog attacks on humans and other animals.” Wyandotte County had a pit bull ban on the books for nearly 30 years and repealed it 5 years ago. Nearly every other city in the metro has repealed breed-specific bans, moving instead to dangerous dog ordinances that focus on the behavior of a dog rather than deeming particular breeds, typically pit bulls, as dangerous.
MOVING FORWARD Molina now plans to move to the suburbs where she hopes she, her husband and Lucy will be safer.
“I’m not going to stay in the city, but I’m going to make as much noise as possible before I leave,” Molina said. “And hopefully it will do something because I don’t know what else to do.”
Chartrand said the police department has been focused on both enforcement and education because, while some are willfully ignoring the rules, others simply grew up with a different perspective on what’s okay. She said the department partners with three outreach groups that hit neighborhoods daily to explain why such rules exist and direct them to free spay/neuter clinics. There are many responsible pet owners in the city, Chartrand emphasized, but those who ignore local ordinances are causing a disproportionate amount of problems.
Chartrand said the number of reported dog bites is down slightly in the past 12 months: 35 versus 42. She added that not everyone is willing to seek charges as a bite victim, and that is an essential step to holding dog owners accountable. She praised Molina for standing firm and encouraged others to show as much conviction.

I had this sermon yesterday, and it helped me collate my thoughts
For the everyone, Christianity isn't a self-help or a religion that makes you feel good. It is a faith that is real. Sharing the word and preaching may not turn the hearts of others. You need to clarify the non-believers' doubts. However, this is for everyone to read.
Science doesn't argue that God isn't real. God and science aren't enemies. They are in fact allies. God made science and science proves of God is existence.
1) Faith and science are complementary.
John 4:21-24 describes the Samaritan woman asking Jesus which is mountain/temple is the right place to seek God. Jesus instead tells her how God is spiritual. Heaven and hell are not physical locations, but a spiritual location. Therefore you need to connect to God spiritually.
Science cannot prove about why the existence of any number. For example, why is 7 seven and not 1 or 2 or 3? Science only assumes numbers. What about right and wrongs? We know that they are real things. We believe they are factual. But right and wrongs differ from person to person. Science can not scientifically prove what is right and what is wrong. Science is used to prove the physical and not physical world. But science also cannot prove science. For example science cannot prove where an atom is from. People say the Big Bang, but what caused it to happen(explained later)? God is beyond the physical world. So science is to study the physical world, whereas faith is to know the spiritual world.
2) Faith provides a basis for science
Science is to prove a principle of a law. But you need to assume that this law exists in the first place because if it doesn't then results are unattainable. This is a hypothesis. If the experimental results are achieved, then the law is true. However, when the results cannot be obtained, the law either is false or needs further proving. But He separated the dry land from water as can be seen in Psalm 105:5-9. The waters flowed over the mountains, went into valleys and He set a boundary they cannot cross and would never again cover earth. Same again in the story of Noah. And also can be seen in Genesis 1 when the world was just water. Before He made these boundaries, the waters were chaotic and with no order. God gave order.
In fact there are also many many famous scientists out there who used the Bible for their hypothesis and so far they are all correct. Johannes Kepler said that he was was merely thinking God's thoughts after Him. Isaac Newton said he studied the Bible to prove scientific theories. However, what the Bible says that is in the later part before the end, that cannot be proven yet. Other than that, God made the world follow a fixed law. Therefore, Christianity is a faith with science to prove that it is true. This leads to the last point
3) Science provides evidence for the Christian faith
Romans 1:18-20 says ‭" [18] For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, [19] because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them. [20] For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse". This shows that there is so much evidence of God in the world like science and the miracles done. So how can God not have the rights to condemn someone to hell? It isn't because He remained hidden and they didn't have the opportunity to know Him. They closed their hearts and believe in His works but not Him. They have everything around them to prove God exists, but they do not heed.
Psalm 8:3-4 shows us the magnitude and power of God. But there would be critics who disagree because we jump into conclusions and "assume" it's right. What if there is an argument to prove that it is right and it in fact is God's powers?
Kalama Cosmological Argument states: 1. Everything must have a cause. 2. The universe began to exist 3. (if the first 2 points make sense which they do, then) Therefore, the universe must have a cause
The Kalam Cosmological Argument can be used on Islam and Christianity but the Christian God is the true God. In Islam, Muhammad was not the Son of God. He was just a prophet. Neither did he die on the cross for the people to redeem their sins. And I don't need to talk about the kids he married. It's pedophilia and there's no argument that that is very wrong. God is righteous and His son should be righteous as well. We know Jesus was righteous and has never sinned. He bored the cross for our shame and suffered to redeem us. This is the real Son of God. Therefore, only our Christian God is true. The gods of other religions cannot exist because of the Kalam Argument that we can agree is true.
The Big Bang, which people argue that this is how God doesn't exist, was only proven in 2003. Do I believe in the Big Bang? Yes. But you see, science is to study the physical world (definition: the systematic study of the structure and behaviour of the physical and natural world through observation, experimentation, and the testing of theories against the evidence obtained). Science only can be used to study the physical world. So the world cannot make the world because the world is science but science cannot make science. In that way, something external must be making the Big Bang happen. So who is this Someone who is external?
Using the Kalam Argument, we can come to a conclusion that 1. The Creator must be extremely powerful to create the world. 2. The Creator has to be non-physical for the world cannot make the world reason. 3. The Creator must be eternal. If not something else would have made Him, thus He would have a beginning. But He cannot have a cause, but cause a cause unless the cause is a person which cannot be true. Complicated to read but try to understand. This sounds like our God that we read about in Gensis! People don't believe because they don't want to, not because they didn't have more than enough evidence to know of God's evidence.
Next, God can use something natural and unnatural to create something. For example, the Red Sea turning red was proven to be because of sediments in the water. And so were the rest of the plague. But the destroyer was a curse (a really bad miracle) and isn't natural. So was Jesus when He went around to heal the sick, blind, deaf, mute, lame, and the possessed. A miracle = cannot be proven by science and totally unrelated to science. Who else can create miracles but by Someone not in the physical world? The consistency in the miracles cannot be a chance. It is the God factor. This can be proven by the Teleolgical Argument.
The Teleolgical Argument says that: 1. The fine-tuning of the universe is due to physical necessity or chance or design (proven by biology, physics or scientific experiments multiple times and would be explained after this) 2. It is not due to physical necessity or chance because unless the universe has a mind then it knows its necessities. And chances are so hard to come by (said later) 3. Thus the universe has to be designed (by God)
Like y=mx+c or other formulas with a constant inside. Gravity, speed of light in vacuum and other laws are also constant.
Now to answer "Can it be by chance?" The answer is 99.999999% no. But let me add that little 0.000001 to prove the God factor. Stephen Hawking said if time at the beginning slowed by 10¹⁰⁰ seconds, the universe would be dead. How can a chance be so accurate? How can there be a chance with such an unspeakable number without a design given? For example, you find an iPhone in the desert and you say its because the winds and weather conditions had assembled and put it together, and Steve Jobs picked it up. So with LOGICAL CONCLUSION, it can be said that there is a Designer to design the universe. According to the first law of thermodynamics, something cannot exist without being created from existing energy. The law states that energy cannot be created or destroyed and Einstein established that energy and mass (the two essense of existence) are essentially the same. But why does God not need a creator? Because the creator would be greater than God. Then won't we worship that creator instead? But thermodynamics only apply to our world. We often forget that God is of a spiritual world and He is eternal, hence, He doesn't need or have a creator.
In conclusion, science and faith are not compatible. That's too weak a word. Science and faith are complementary. Thus, do not disbelieve in God and only believe in science or vice versa. You need something that you can rely on that doesn't change. A constant. Then you might ask why do we believe in a book? We don't believe in book. It's the faith we believe in that is true. As science cannot prove science, the Bible cannot prove the Bible. But so far all the things the Bible was true, even before science had proven these. And those not of science are miracles or not proven yet. If you cannot debut these reasonings, then it only means God is true and that you should start believing in Him. Psalm 8:1-9 shows the magnitude and power of God. Science isn't something we should use to doubt God but to marvel and appreciate the works, even to the finest detail, of God and His designs. Gensis 1:26 says "[26] Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” ". We have dominion over the world as through science and the manipulation of science helps us understand God at a deeper scale. Your faith must have a deeper intellectual evidence. What reflects God's words or existence? I know that all He has said and still says has come true and thus will also come true. I know this because I see His works through History, Science etc. Build a faith with facts and knowledge but also with belief. You can further read things to strengthen your faith, like Reasonable Faith(or William Lane Craig, his youtube channel if you hate reading a lot, but since you got this far then maybe you do like reading), or books from Timothy Keller and C.S Lewis.
I would say that faith by knowledge is to accept in God and faith by feelings is to strengthen our love for God. I pray that we would have more brothers and sisters as well who would come to God through all these factors and we would have the brothers and sisters we lost to come back to God. In Jesus's most precious name I pray, Amen.

I had this sermon yesterday, and it helped me collate my thoughts
For the everyone, Christianity isn't a self-help or a religion that makes you feel good. It is a faith that is real. Sharing the word and preaching may not turn the hearts of others. You need to clarify the non-believers' doubts. However, this is for everyone to read.
Science doesn't argue that God isn't real. God and science aren't enemies. They are in fact allies. God made science and science proves of God is existence.
1) Faith and science are complementary.
John 4:21-24 describes the Samaritan woman asking Jesus which is mountain/temple is the right place to seek God. Jesus instead tells her how God is spiritual. Heaven and hell are not physical locations, but a spiritual location. Therefore you need to connect to God spiritually.
Science cannot prove about why the existence of any number. For example, why is 7 seven and not 1 or 2 or 3? Science only assumes numbers. What about right and wrongs? We know that they are real things. We believe they are factual. But right and wrongs differ from person to person. Science can not scientifically prove what is right and what is wrong. Science is used to prove the physical and not physical world. But science also cannot prove science. For example science cannot prove where an atom is from. People say the Big Bang, but what caused it to happen(explained later)? God is beyond the physical world. So science is to study the physical world, whereas faith is to know the spiritual world.
2) Faith provides a basis for science
Science is to prove a principle of a law. But you need to assume that this law exists in the first place because if it doesn't then results are unattainable. This is a hypothesis. If the experimental results are achieved, then the law is true. However, when the results cannot be obtained, the law either is false or needs further proving. But He separated the dry land from water as can be seen in Psalm 105:5-9. The waters flowed over the mountains, went into valleys and He set a boundary they cannot cross and would never again cover earth. Same again in the story of Noah. And also can be seen in Genesis 1 when the world was just water. Before He made these boundaries, the waters were chaotic and with no order. God gave order.
In fact there are also many many famous scientists out there who used the Bible for their hypothesis and so far they are all correct. Johannes Kepler said that he was was merely thinking God's thoughts after Him. Isaac Newton said he studied the Bible to prove scientific theories. However, what the Bible says that is in the later part before the end, that cannot be proven yet. Other than that, God made the world follow a fixed law. Therefore, Christianity is a faith with science to prove that it is true. This leads to the last point
3) Science provides evidence for the Christian faith
Romans 1:18-20 says ‭" [18] For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, [19] because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them. [20] For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse". This shows that there is so much evidence of God in the world like science and the miracles done. So how can God not have the rights to condemn someone to hell? It isn't because He remained hidden and they didn't have the opportunity to know Him. They closed their hearts and believe in His works but not Him. They have everything around them to prove God exists, but they do not heed.
Psalm 8:3-4 shows us the magnitude and power of God. But there would be critics who disagree because we jump into conclusions and "assume" it's right. What if there is an argument to prove that it is right and it in fact is God's powers?
Kalama Cosmological Argument states: 1. Everything must have a cause. 2. The universe began to exist 3. (if the first 2 points make sense which they do, then) Therefore, the universe must have a cause
The Kalam Cosmological Argument can be used on Islam and Christianity but the Christian God is the true God. In Islam, Muhammad was not the Son of God. He was just a prophet. Neither did he die on the cross for the people to redeem their sins. And I don't need to talk about the kids he married. It's pedophilia and there's no argument that that is very wrong. God is righteous and His son should be righteous as well. We know Jesus was righteous and has never sinned. He bored the cross for our shame and suffered to redeem us. This is the real Son of God. Therefore, only our Christian God is true. The gods of other religions cannot exist because of the Kalam Argument that we can agree is true.
The Big Bang, which people argue that this is how God doesn't exist, was only proven in 2003. Do I believe in the Big Bang? Yes. But you see, science is to study the physical world (definition: the systematic study of the structure and behaviour of the physical and natural world through observation, experimentation, and the testing of theories against the evidence obtained). Science only can be used to study the physical world. So the world cannot make the world because the world is science but science cannot make science. In that way, something external must be making the Big Bang happen. So who is this Someone who is external?
Using the Kalam Argument, we can come to a conclusion that 1. The Creator must be extremely powerful to create the world. 2. The Creator has to be non-physical for the world cannot make the world reason. 3. The Creator must be eternal. If not something else would have made Him, thus He would have a beginning. But He cannot have a cause, but cause a cause unless the cause is a person which cannot be true. Complicated to read but try to understand. This sounds like our God that we read about in Gensis! People don't believe because they don't want to, not because they didn't have more than enough evidence to know of God's evidence.
Next, God can use something natural and unnatural to create something. For example, the Red Sea turning red was proven to be because of sediments in the water. And so were the rest of the plague. But the destroyer was a curse (a really bad miracle) and isn't natural. So was Jesus when He went around to heal the sick, blind, deaf, mute, lame, and the possessed. A miracle = cannot be proven by science and totally unrelated to science. Who else can create miracles but by Someone not in the physical world? The consistency in the miracles cannot be a chance. It is the God factor. This can be proven by the Teleolgical Argument.
The Teleolgical Argument says that: 1. The fine-tuning of the universe is due to physical necessity or chance or design (proven by biology, physics or scientific experiments multiple times and would be explained after this) 2. It is not due to physical necessity or chance because unless the universe has a mind then it knows its necessities. And chances are so hard to come by (said later) 3. Thus the universe has to be designed (by God)
Like y=mx+c or other formulas with a constant inside. Gravity, speed of light in vacuum and other laws are also constant.
Now to answer "Can it be by chance?" The answer is 99.999999% no. But let me add that little 0.000001 to prove the God factor. Stephen Hawking said if time at the beginning slowed by 10¹⁰⁰ seconds, the universe would be dead. How can a chance be so accurate? How can there be a chance with such an unspeakable number without a design given? For example, you find an iPhone in the desert and you say its because the winds and weather conditions had assembled and put it together, and Steve Jobs picked it up. So with LOGICAL CONCLUSION, it can be said that there is a Designer to design the universe. According to the first law of thermodynamics, something cannot exist without being created from existing energy. The law states that energy cannot be created or destroyed and Einstein established that energy and mass (the two essense of existence) are essentially the same. But why does God not need a creator? Because the creator would be greater than God. Then won't we worship that creator instead? But thermodynamics only apply to our world. We often forget that God is of a spiritual world and He is eternal, hence, He doesn't need or have a creator.
In conclusion, science and faith are not compatible. That's too weak a word. Science and faith are complementary. Thus, do not disbelieve in God and only believe in science or vice versa. You need something that you can rely on that doesn't change. A constant. Then you might ask why do we believe in a book? We don't believe in book. It's the faith we believe in that is true. As science cannot prove science, the Bible cannot prove the Bible. But so far all the things the Bible was true, even before science had proven these. And those not of science are miracles or not proven yet. If you cannot debut these reasonings, then it only means God is true and that you should start believing in Him. Psalm 8:1-9 shows the magnitude and power of God. Science isn't something we should use to doubt God but to marvel and appreciate the works, even to the finest detail, of God and His designs. Gensis 1:26 says "[26] Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” ". We have dominion over the world as through science and the manipulation of science helps us understand God at a deeper scale. Your faith must have a deeper intellectual evidence. What reflects God's words or existence? I know that all He has said and still says has come true and thus will also come true. I know this because I see His works through History, Science etc. Build a faith with facts and knowledge but also with belief. You can further read things to strengthen your faith, like Reasonable Faith(or William Lane Craig, his youtube channel if you hate reading a lot, but since you got this far then maybe you do like reading), or books from Timothy Keller and C.S Lewis.
I would say that faith by knowledge is to accept in God and faith by feelings is to strengthen our love for God. I pray that we would have more brothers and sisters as well who would come to God through all these factors and we would have the brothers and sisters we lost to come back to God. In Jesus's most precious name I pray, Amen.