How to tell a wart

Trigger warning - SA
I’m so confused about this virus. Recently, the way my PC doctor explained this to me…she said for the virus to expose itself like this. Something caused some sort of inflammation in my body to awaken this virus. Which could have been my miscarriage.
A preventative care Dr told me my test results could tell I had a dormant virus in my system in 2021, when I did a whole body evaluation.
My PC Dr said that I could have picked it up from my very first time, even 20 years ago. Which would have been sexual assault by my uncle and cousin. Which 10000% could have been. My Aunt and her husband disclosed with the family they had some sort of Sti. My family thinks they did have HPV. High society pieces of trash. I’m disgusted. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I was doomed from the beginning.
I don’t understand this virus. How come I had a negative HPV pap in mid 2021, yet another Dr’s test could tell I had something dormant inside me in early 2021?
I’ve been with the same person for the last 15 years, but we’ve had other partners outside of our relationship. But he was a virgin when we met.
I don’t have any wart symptoms. I can’t even recall if I did back when I was a kid. I’m getting more tests done this upcoming week.
Can someone explain more to me? My mind can’t accept “We don’t know too much about how this virus behaves.”

I probably spent over an hour roasting a resume yesterday. Someone then commented that they would post their resume on here to be roasted if they knew they could get detailed feedback like that. Unfortunately, I do one of these deep dives only about once or twice a month so I thought I’d share some tips on how to self-roast your resume. I’m also opening this post up to discussion for others to share their own tips on how to create more effective resumes, so hit the reply button and share your brilliance.
Here’s a few tips to get things started.

1. The hardest thing for people to remember when updating their resume is that the bullets for their previous job(s) should all be in the past tense. I’ve seen resumes on here where every job bullet was in the present tense. Anal retentive hiring managers will notice and it can be a distraction during their review of your CV.
   
2. Read the review comments from recent resume roasts for suggestions and ideas to make your resume better. Sometimes an oddball resume format may cause you to reexamine your preconceived notions of what an effective resume looks like: for example, you can write an effective resume that’s more than a page long but unless you have off the charts work experiences to sell and have above average writing skills, the one page format is your friend for 85% of candidates.
   
3. How do you read all the recent resume roasts without slogging through a gazillion other posts on this sub? The easiest way is to go to your internet browser, not the mobile app, and to search old.reddit. Copy and past this to your browser and it should save you some time:
   

https://old.reddit.com/FPandA/search/?q=roast&sort=new&restrict_sr=on&t=all

1. Start commenting on others’s resumes submitted for roasting. A lot of what I do in roasting a resume is noticing errors that the author is too blind to see because it’s their baby and no one wants to admit that their baby has warts. It’s actually a psychological roadblock called a scotoma where you believe nothing is wrong and therefore don’t see the glaring errors apparent to everyone else. The more you review and notice the errors in others’s resumes the more you will become immune to this limitation.
   
2. If something makes you stand out from other candidates, include it at the top of your resume. If it makes you appear less than other candidates, push it to the bottom. For example, it would be idiotic not to include both a summary section and education section at the top if you did your MBA at a top tier graduate school and worked at a FAANG (MAANG) several jobs ago. If you only have a non-finance bachelor’s degree, put education at the bottom of the resume: otherwise, you may be eliminated by a hiring manager before they’ve even read your work experience. They may still reject you for this; however, at least they have the complete mosaic of you before reaching that conclusion.
   
3. Most accomplishment bullets should be one sentence long and no more than two lines of text.
   
4. Projects deserve more length to adequately tell the story. Take 3-4 sentences and no more than three lines of text to convey the problem/opportunity, the other teams involved, your specific contribution, and the outcome achieved preferably in quantifiable metrics (15% reduction in office supplies expense).
   
5. If you don’t have any accomplishments on your resume that include quantitative metrics ($25M, 17%), you are at a competitive disadvantage compared to other candidates who do.
   
6. Read your resume out loud. Maybe not from your cubicle on in office days, but find someplace quiet at home and listen to how the phrasing sounds to your ear. Some people write in an overly formal manner when fewer gargantuan words would serve them better. Speaking your resume out loud can catch errors or poor word choice that may otherwise go undetected from a visual reading.
   

Hey all, 4th Wall here. The little storm that blew threw upended my, sort of, schedule. So, I'm just decided to write what came to mind first then alternate from there. Hope you guys enjoy the Episode.
First, Previous, Next (Patreon)
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Benjamin stared at the exhausted looking Farie in shock, “How much time do we have?”. Jukha simply stood, stepped over to the floorboards near the fireplace, and began ripping them up with his bare hands. After several planks yielded to his strength, Jukha pulled out a pair of packs, and handed one to Vilora. “Oh” Ben stated flatly, having been given the answer to his question. He turned to see the sisters already packing up their packs, and Ben began the same.

In moments, the four were ready to go, slipping out the back door and into the forest. Benjamin paused, “Hold on a moment.” He turned to look back at the house, reaching out with one hand before clenching it into a fist. He ripped the heat out of the roaring fire dispelling it into the air before kneeling down and placing both hands on the ground. Vilora gasped quietly at the power Benjamin began wielding a dangerous amount of Majik. He pulled from the depths of the world itself, summoning pure compounds from the ground and from various natural sources. He used the refuse in Jukha’s farmyard to provide him with the last of the required ingredients. It wouldn’t be much, but Benjamin relit the fireplace, forcing the flames to turn a few of the remaining logs into charcoal without burning them.
Extinguishing the flames once more, he combined the components he had acquired, before willing the concoction up into the flue and packing it around the circumference of the inside of the brick chimney. Vilora stepped up to him, touching his shoulder with a trembling hand, “What… what have you done. I felt it, but I don’t understand it.”
Benjamin took a long cleansing, and slightly shakey breath. The exertion left him feeling drained for a moment. He turned to her, expression was grim, but he patted her hand on his forearm, “Giving us some breathing room. They will search the house. I’ve just left them a little surprise.” He stood, looking towards the forest, “how do we get to your sisters.”

Vilora nodded and they followed her into the forest, it was not a long walk. And after about 20 minutes they came to a clearing with a strange tree in the middle. “Please, Ben. Whatever happens next, know that we are not Fay. Promise me.” Benjamin heard the fear in her voice wondering if it was from what he had just done, or something deeper. He nodded once absently, his musket already unslung and in his hands. He had loaded a buck and ball cartridge into it before they left the cabin, knowing that he was only going to get one shot in an ambush. Viola had his original flintlock pistol in her hand, and Valtrya was semi hiding behind her sister with Bens Stiletto dagger clutched tightly in her fingers. “Very well,” the Farie stated, and turned to face the tree. Her wings quickly began glowing a vibrant green, and they fluttered violently as she began to chant something in her native tongue.

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The Hunters arrived, led by the singular Orc from the capital guard. He was the same one that had been spared by Benjamin just over a week earlier. He brought with him a tracker. Ski’murika was one of the arachnid people known as Sil’skira. This one was a flat grey to Mi’ki’s own jet-black carapace, and she skittered lightly into the room. The Sil’Skira had no sense of smell, but their sense of taste bordered on the supernatural. She raised one leg to her mandibles, tasting the ground around them, before dipping it into a bowl and repeating the process, “four of them. An Orc, a Fay, two Aereesin females, and… a strange one. I’ve not sampled this one before, but he carries majik’s sour aftertaste.” The Soldier orc, and the three other Hunters managed to not cringe. The Sil’Skira were known for their wide… pallet… as far as what they considered food. Many a sentient being had been turned to a husk by a hungry Sil, and The Orc did not doubt that this one came by her… flavor recognition… honestly. The other three; a Hellirine named Jazeel, her twin brother named Jeraal, and a Mountain troll who’s name defied pronunciation gave the Sil a wide birth, stepping up to the fireplace. “Well, while we’re here. Lets warm our bones.” Jazeel casually began stacking wood and kindling atop the chared remains of an apparently freshly quenched fire. “How far do you think they could have gone?”

“Not far” the Sil’Skira stated absently, “Their food is but lukewarm. I can still taste the spittle on the strange one’s spoon.” She turned to pad over to the fireplace. The Soldier orc, named Gurrut leaned up against the table, “Should we really be stopping for a fire? If they are so close?” Jeraal only smirked, “It’s a long game boss. They may not have gotten far, but they will be frantic. Look at how they left. Something, or someone warned them. They will be ill prepared. No, better to keep our pace. We will wear them down easily in the mor..”

Jazeel lit a spark into her tinder box while her brother was talking. She placed it into the fireplace and the kindling lit quickly. A single twig flared up, sending an ember into the flu where Benjamin had packed his quickly made gunpowder. It ignited instantly, and the flu provided enough constriction to pressurize the reaction. The fireplace detonated in a weak, but effective improvised bomb. The brickwork shattered into shards of deadly fragmentation, Jareel simply ceased to exist, being turned to a cloud of yellow blood and internal organs trimmed in red skin and white bone fragments. Her brother’s head was caved in by a large brick chunk, sending skull bone spalling deep into his brain, rending it to ribbons. He died before he hit the floor. The Sil’Skira’s abdomen popped like a balloon in the over pressure wave, and she quickly curled into a quivering ball as her blood pressure dropped, no longer fighting against her leg muscles. Their employer, the soldier orc from the capital, lost his arm above the elbow. His armor saved his vital organs however, but one shard threaded the needle, taking his right eye. The Mountain troll was thrown to the far wall, but Her naturally resilient body survived both the shockwave and the fragmentation impacts. She picked herself off the floor, stumbling to the screaming capital guard. She bound his wounds quickly before taking a flaming shard of the sabotaged fire and searing the stump to stop the bleeding. She then left him there. There was no point in anything else. The hunt was over.

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Benjamin tried not to stare, but he was failing miserably. Jukha’s Farie wife’s body was glowing bright green now, and he almost had to shade his eyes if he tried to look directly at her. She was not the only one he was struggling not to stare at. Viola’s explanation and subsequent revelation had taken him by surprise. He realized that he had treated them like children, pupils at best. Benjamin had focused on training them to be free, turning a blind eye to the relationship forming between them and himself. *You are not forcing us to do anything but leave* He ran that statement over in his mind. The “leave you” was implicated heavily, and it ate at him. He did not want to force these girls to do anything. Yet, despite his best efforts, he was forcing something on them anyway. He silently both cursed his situation and cursed his own ignorance. He found that, if he was truthful with himself, he did not want them to leave either; and that more personal revelation brought its own paradox. He could not bear to own them as property, but the thought of leaving them tore at him with similar pain.

“It is almost time!” Benjamin looked back from where he was keeping watch, Vilora was panting heavily, her painfully bright glowing wings drooping slightly, “I won’t be able to keep the connection for long!” She called as the tree in front of them began to creak. Two of its great limbs began to move on their own accord, groaning under forces older than space and time. Benjamin’s eyes widened as the two branches slowly formed a sphere, then his head snapped around at the sound of a dull thud emanating from the direction they had come. He smiled grimly. His little IED must have been triggered, and with any luck, taken their pursuers with it.

“Ready yourselves!” Jukha called, and Ben turned back to a view he had not expected in his wildest dreams. ‘you’ve gatta be shitting me’ He thought as a rippling green mirror filled in the center of the circle created by the branches of the tree. Benjamin felt the sisters at his side. And he nodded to them, “you first. I’ll cover our six.” Vi raised an eyebrow at the odd expression but nodded. Taking her sister’s hand and stepping through the portal. They were closely followed by Jukha, who seemed absurdly calm about the whole thing. Benjamin held his ground, slowly backing toward the portal while he kept his eye on the tree line.

“Benjamin. Hurry, I can’t.. I can’t hold!” Vilora’s frantic tone moved Benjamin into action, He spun on his heels, slipping his musket to his left hand and scooping up Vilora as he passed her at a full sprint. He jumped as the portal sputtered, passing through it and into a familiar tunnel that he remembered from his first meeting with the Celestial, Sol. This one was a minute fraction of the distance, however, a single step in fact. His feet landed on soft moss and an earthy smell alerted him to his change of location. His eyes began to adjust to the much dimmer light as he set Vilora’s exhausted form on the ground gently. His eyes peeled away the darkness after a moment and Benjamin grunted, tucking the butt of the musket under his right arm as he thumbed the hammer and slapped the frizzen in place. He drew his sword/pistol hybrid and settled the sights on a second being, who just so happened to have the misfortune of being ordered to bind the sister’s wrists. The mechanical sounds of his weapons attracted the attention of everyone in attendance, but his voice froze them in place, “unbind them… now” he growled.
His musket, loaded with Buck and ball, was trained on a small group of Farie’s standing in close formation with thin lances rested base to the on the ground. The other Farie was currently holding the rope leash to the sisters. He glanced at the small squad of lancers, “you move, you die.” His tone bore icy promise on its wings, and even Jukha could not bring himself to act. “Benjamin. Peace, please. These are my sisters. They are Vin. Remember your promise” Vilora’s voice cut through the silence first, and Benjamin glanced at her, then back at the scene in front of him. He took a long deep breath, sheathing his sword/revolver, and lowering his Musket. He did not sling it, he returned it so a muzzle up ready position designed to keep his ammunition from falling out of the barrel should he still need it. “Then please explain to them that I have a pathological aversion these women being bound, and that It would be in their best interest to release them...mediately.” Vilora’s eyes widened as she turned to see the state of Vi and Val. She spoke quickly, and the Vin who held the girls looked back at Ben in shock before frantically unbinding both Vi and Val. The girls sprinted to Benjamin, slamming into him with shaking embraces before he gently, but protectively pushed them behind him.

One of the Lancers, a Farie with more ornate armor on than the rest stepped forward and Benjamin turned to face her, not so subtly settling his musket into a position to easily kill her if he needed. The Fairie paused, clearly considering something before Vilora stepped over and laid a hand on her shoulder. She shook her head at the other woman, it was an almost imperceptible thing, but the other farie’s eyes widened as she regarded Benjamin again. “Peace, Beenjaymin.” She said finally, handing off her lance to a subordinate and opening her hands to show them empty. “We do not mean you harm, but we must protect what little we have left. The Matriarch wishes to see you, but we cannot allow you to meet here bearing arms. Please, understand.”

Benjamin hesitated, and Viola leaned around him to look up. He gave her a smiling glance before looking back at the Farie. She nodded in understanding, “I swear to you. Your… girls… will be permitted to stay at your side for the trip. Our sister has explained that they are not mere slaves to you.” Benjamin eyed her skeptically, and if this realms concept of honesty were not already explained to him, he would have not believed her. He slowly reached for the hammer on his musket, lowering it gently to half-cock before handing it slowly to the Farie who originally bound the sisters, “Do not touch anything on it. This is not a weapon you have any concept of, and it can kill 4 people at once.” He held her gaze until she nodded, “lean it against something. This side up, and DON’T touch it.” He then unhooked the scabbard from his belt, handing the revolver sword and its sheath to her as one unit, “Same goes for this. I’ll know if you touch it. It is very loud.” He did the same with Vi’s flintlock pistol, surprised that it didn’t go off when it was dropped on the ground during their capture. The stiletto dagger was the last, a familiar weapon to this realm that needed no explanation.

“Very well.” Benjamin said finally, “I believe that is everything.” The head lancer nodded, waving an arm elegantly toward the biggest live oak that Benjamin had ever seen. Benjamin thought it might be a live oak, at least. It stood twice the height of a California Red Wood but had the proportions of a Live oak. Massive drooping main branches arched overhead before touching the ground and returning skyward. Some of the largest limbs were the lowest and seem to bounce along the ground. Each grounding seemed to sprout smaller trees, and Benjamin felt his mouth fall open as they drew closer. The texture of the limbs sharpened as they closed, and Benjamin began to make out lit windows, carved into the tree limbs themselves.

Carved into the base of the tree was an ornate entrance with lettering that Benjamin didn’t recognize carved into the arches. Benjamin felt Viola take one of his hands, and Valtrya take the other. He ran his thumbs over the soft tops of their hands, trying to comfort them as much as he could. He felt them press up against him as they entered a throne room of some kind. On the far end, atop a series of steps was a throne, carved into the wall itself. “The Matriarch” Vilora whispered from behind him.

Ben halted several paces behind the lancer squad, bowing as he watched Vilora and Jukha do so out of the corner of his eye. “Rise” came the command from the ornately yet unarmored Farie sitting on the throne, “So tell me,” She asked, looking directly at Benjamin, who was keeping the girls directly behind him, “Are you the reason that my orders to bind the Aereesins were not followed?” Benjamin instantly regretted giving up his weapons. “I am,” he stated meeting her gaze unflinchingly. “Oh? You believe yourself above my command?” Her cold tone registered, and Benjamin slowly closed his fist, finding what he was looking for. A single guard, one not present at their arrival began to march toward him, hand on her sword.

Benjamin speared the guard with an icy glare, while talking to the Farie ruler, “I expected Vin to be more hospitable.” He reached out with one hand and the guard froze as he gripped the metal of her armor with his mind, “Especially with women baring Vin names in solidarity.” He slowly began to close his outstretched fist, and the guard inside the armor began screaming as the metal buckled, compressing against her body. Benjamin finally turned his icy gaze to the monarch, “My girls” He hated to use that card, but it was the only one he had that wasn’t lethal, “Have spent over a century being bound, tortured, raped, and degraded. I killed their former master, a Romoregin no less, for it. I killed his puke son’s champion for it. I’ve killed two capital guards for it. I will kill without mercy to keep bindings from touching their skin. So, my lady what are you willing to do to bind them.” He gave the guards armor another small squeeze, using the shrieking metal to punctuate his resolve.

The queen slowly stepped off her Throne, walking stoically over to her guard as she eyed Benjamin contemplatively. “Stand down, Vailin.” She said to the now trembling guard, but her eyes were on Benjamin. Benjamin slowly released his grip on her armor and she fell to the floor, weeping. “You two, get her to a healer.” The monarch ordered before taking to her wings and hovering up to face Benjamin at eye level. “You care so much for your slaves, yet you do not free them. Why is that.”

“Benjamin doesn’t want to keep us slaves!” Viola blurted out before she caught herself meekly adding “Your majesty” as the Monarch leveled a surprised but firm expression at her. “Oh? And yet you are still his, dear.” she said, turning back to Benjamin. Benjamin took a deep breath, “The principality would have resold them anyway. My only choice was to own them, teach them, then smuggle them to a free nation, or murder them by returning them to the system. Had we made it to Maridia, they would be emancipated already.” He met the Monarchs gaze levelly, “Their lives are in my hands… but at least their blood isn’t on them.”

“Hmm, compassion and violence of action. No wonder Cosmos touched you.” The Queen mused. Benjamin chuckled at the expression drawing a raised eyebrow from the Vin Monarch, “Something funny, young one?” and Benjamin gave her an amused smile, “It’s just that I’ve heard something like that before, from Sol. I believe the Orcs call her Suelin.”

This time, the Vin Monarch’s face smoothed of all expression as she failed to find any falsehood in Benjamin, “Come with me, please.” She stated it as a question, but her urgency peaked Benjamin's curiosity. The four of them followed the queen up to the throne. She pulled on an armrest and the throne slid into the wall to one side, revealing a simply carved passage into the heart of the tree.
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f you made it this far, I very much appreciate it. I hope you enjoyed the episode! If you believe I have earned it, I have a Patreon that is two episodes ahead of the free releases for this series. I hope you feel taking a look is worth it. Either way, come hang out in the comments. Everyone's welcome! I've discovered Im a bit of a "warts and all" poster, so even critical comments are welcome. Hell, You might even teach me something (it happens more than I'd like to admit).
I have heard people off and on reference Royal road, So I am going to give it another shot. I'll be adding the Royal Road link from now on. If you like reading over there, It is on the same schedule as here. I would greatly appreciate a like/review/comment if you feel so inclined. Thank you again for stopping by.
First, Previous, Next (Patreon) Royal Road

"I don't make them stand in front of the miniguns." Me, responding to a 199X email asking how I keep my NPCs from being shredded by miniguns.
“Did I dream myself to death again? Don’t we have a guy for that?” - Electric Warrior [T/M], behind the scenes at his marathon 3 week dreamstream.
“All I remember is I was watching AR porn when I rammed into the biggest cock I’d ever seen.” Cyrus Pessoa [M/D], testifying at his manslaughter trial for rear ending a city bus with a Citymaster, killing 27.
“At any point in your life did you consider moving on from the fat crayons?” Sativola [F/D], rated 5th most influential art critic, reviewing a work by Oihenarte Janosek [M/D]. The value of all of his works dropped by 95% after the comment.
“Did you see him hit the ground and die? No? Cuz, I don’t care how far he fell out of that helicopter, he’s your arch enemy. They simply don’t go out like that.” Matriarch [F/H], Author of “Chromed Memoirs: Yet Another Goddamn Runner Story”.
“Discretion isn’t all that necessary if your enemy isn’t paying any attention.” Silentstar [F/H], from her book “Woah, There: Logical Run Planning”, p. 2071
“Don’t pick at it.” - Simple advice that a recent New England Of Medicine study showed would prevent 15% of post-op cyber and bio infections if followed.
“For every bed of roses, there will be a bed of thorns. Which will you lie on?” - Riku [H/M], Leader Of The “Front 50/50” Policlub, one of the new breed of ‘Economist Policlubs' to crop up in recent years.
“He who laughs last often doesn’t realize how severe his injuries are yet.” Tiffany Gawronski [F/O], former DocWagon employee and host of “The Shadow’s Stupidest Samurai”.
“I am happy to report that the two sides have agreed to cease hostilities at midnight. Until then, and I quote, ‘The game is motherfucking on.’” - Kiley Correra [F/E], arbiter for the Babakku and Konton-Shi gangs, ending (eventually) weeks of bloodshed.
“I did show an astonishingly high aptitude towards surviving falls from very high distances, but they don’t really give bonuses for that.” - Celese [F/H], from her autobio “I Was A Runner Wannabe", p. 2073
“I gave up crime so I could go about stealing shit the legal way.” Alexa Mossadegh (Shadowstalker) [F/H] in her autobio "Lawyers, Corps And Cops: A Former Runner’s Life On The Top Ten Floors", p. 2071
“I looked down, and it was GONE! I wasn’t even sure which orifice I lost it in!” Ezekiel Lodge [M/E], in a graphic vlog post after a drug fueled encounter with a malfunctioning sexbot.
“I still want the record to show that I beat the living shit out of that donkey.” Dill Wart [O/M], In a rambling police statement after a drunken miscommunication at The Screaming Asses’ 'Donkey Punch' night.
“I take everything a woman has, lock her in a room for a week with nothing but a razor blade, and if she’s still alive after seven days: I give it all back.” Unnamed Evo exec, quoted in “Games Trillionaires Play” (p. 2075), by Felipa Sabo [F/H], (d. 2075).
“I won Body Mod Bod of the year, and all I had to do was get hit by a truck.” Azurepyre [F/E], In a post award ceremony interview with ‘Metal Meat' magazine.
“I’m sorry, but we recently refinished the floors. Your commandos will just have to invade on the lawn.” President Lành Phan [M/H] of Nong Khai after an Udon Thani incursion. The micronations have invaded each other over 60 times in the past decade.
“I’ve been in the midst of an implant assisted orgasm since 2062. Just easier to nev..oh…never shut it off.” - Jenny Gleem [F/H], simporn actress.
“If somebody described a trip to the bathroom as ‘life changing’, you think negatively because, regardless if the experience was good or bad, there’s still a bathroom involved.” Bingo [F/T] from her book “The Worst: Surviving The Z Zone”, p. 2069
“If we lock a man in a room, and return to find the man standing next to a pile of shit, we can no longer even prove that it’s his shit.” Attorney Daniel Brown [M/H] from ‘Magic Mayhem: The New Legal Order’, p. 2031
“Laziness Is Fatal” Loose translation of the motto of Fujitimaha Motors, an automotive sweatshop recently shut down on Japan's Yakushima Island. It is one of over a dozen ‘counterfeit car" operations shut down in recent months.
“Never let another person tie your knots. Even your mom has a tiny part of her that thinks you should die.” Seraphic [F/H], Host of ‘Don’t Fuck Up: Survival In The Sprawl', daily senseburst.
“Operation Dog Fart” The code name casually given by the U.K. to their 2063 Falkland raid, not realizing it would go on to be one of the most successful military actions of the decade, destined to be taught in military academies for years.
“Thankfully, I’m too stupid to grasp the concept of embarrassment.” Big Bubba Bartholomew [M/D], after winning the Butt Network’s ‘Public Pooping’ contest, coming from behind and pinching the lead after destroying his opponent in both mass and precision.
“You can tell a lot about a person by how they laugh. I, for instance, laugh like an asshole, which is 100% on the mark.” Razor, Radio Phree Philadelphia, available on FM receivers everywhere.
“You think I’m disappointed; I think I heard God shoot herself.” - Dawnhunter [F/D], deconstructing the new hopefuls on the hit stream ‘Dumped In The Shadows: From Rejects To Runners In 30 Days.’
“We’ve made a pretty good business out of other runners fucking up royal.” Resolution [M/T], Owner Of ‘Pinch Hitters Runner Support Services'.
“Facts, when combined with an assault cannon, constitute the greatest force in the world.” Anvil [M/O] ‘KnowNow’ Policlub And Militia Leader
“We just put a lot of effort into getting our enemies to exhaust all but one option, and then pounce on that option.” White Pony [F/O], DeeCee Area Runner.
“A fertile mind needs a lot of shit dumped onto it to grow to its full potential. It’s either that or they drown in the shit.” Lam An [M/H], Commander, Bogota Bravo Faction, During Sentencing For The Murder Of 278 Child Recruits
“I’ve found that changing my mind at the last minute only results in two fuckups instead of one.” Province [F/H], Boston Area Runner
“If knowledge is dangerous, I feel pretty safe around here.” Random Patron, “Dumbs Bar And Grill”, After Passing The Location’s ‘Lack Of Intelligence’ Test.
“It wasn’t until I made all this fucking money that I realized how many friends I have.” - Biggie Bang [D/M], DJ And Recording Artist.
“I got so many Colt M23s crammed into my bathroom alone that I have to shit in the yard. The neighbors don’t complain, probably because of all the Colt M23s I got crammed into my bathroom.” - Finnick, Fence
“Running on fumes is still running.” – Blackjack [M/H], From The Autobio “Grade D, But Edible: 25 Years In The Sprawl”, 2051 SimonEl Press
“Running is like adding too much garlic to a salad; Rude if you’re feeding vampire…...I’m not sure where I was going with that.“ - Chris, The Cracked Cranium Comedian [O/M].
“Another 50k run? I still owe ten grand from the last one!” - Stoobie [D/M], 17th Worst Sammy In The Sprawl.
“All these conceded masses who think they matter because of their differing opinions disgust me! I’m better than you! Just accept that and watch!” - Erika Grey [F/H], Commentator, XF Zero NewsEve.
“Apathy is pulling the trigger and not giving a shit whether or not it fires. True apathy is not bothering to pull the trigger at all.” KillJoy [H/M] [DECEASED], Samurai , From The Bio “Dented Chrome: Streets, Sewers And Suicide”, 2065 SimonEl Press.
“Pull your head into your shell, little turtle. I’ll be ready with the guillotine when you poke it back out.” Dzuljeta Ji-Hye [F/H], Former CIA Sniper, From The Bio “One Chance”, 2071 Simon El Press.
“Facts only make it harder to form a pure ethos. I despise you. I don’t need to know why.” - Ho Bustillo [M/H], Humanis Policlub Initiate.
“A lie will rumble through the sprawl for days before the truth even gets its shit together.” Joeann Dimario [F/E], Investigative Reporter, InDeep News.
“It isn’t the lights and cameras that frighten a true performer. It’s what happens when the lights and cameras are turned off that gives us nightmares.” Dyna [F/E], Former Megastar, From The Autobiosim “It’s Not A Star, It’s A Flare”, 2068 SimonEl Press.
“The only thing a fuckup can learn is how to be a better fuckup, regardless of the tech involved.” – Sif Simon [F/H], Synaptic Enhancement Surgeon.
-bjk

Chapter 26 - The Infinite Beckons
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“Okay, this part’s a little tricky.” Ma’et gestured out the shuttle’s cockpit. “You got lined up easy enough, and our velocity’s at a relative zero to the ship. The bay door’s open. Now you engage the lateral thrusters while monitoring the distance from the shuttle to the bay’s interior wall. Come in too fast and you’ll damage them both..”
Trix looked over at the controls, and the neatly gummed labels that the humans had placed over the English text with her own language. She gingerly pressed the ‘Lateral Thruster’ button, then as the control knob next to it lit up, she twisted it slowly.
An earlier misadventure when lining up the ship and the shuttle where she’d twisted the control knob much more rapidly made her much more cautious about giving it too much power too quickly, yet the shuttle slowly drifted - away from the ship. “Other thruster, feathers.”
Chagrined, she dialed the thruster back to zero, then rotated it the other direction. The ship immediately stopped moving away, and instead drifted into the hangar bay. Trix watched as it drifted past the door, staring at the distance readout until it dropped into the yellow and immediately swung the knob the other way. It took a couple of tries to get the velocity back to zero, but she managed it.
“Beautiful. Now we engage the grav plating which lets the ship’s internal grav pull us down as it ramps up, and close the external door via the console over there.” Ma’et gestured to the remote console, and Trix scanned it, punching the buttons as she found them.
“Nicely done. Go ahead and hit the engine shutdown. In the old days there’d be like, thirty steps to it but nearly all of it is automated. But lucky you, you get to read all about the manual sequence since taking over in the event of computer failure is one of a pilot’s duties.” Ma’et chuckled and squeezed Trix’s shoulder. “For now, that’s good enough. Go ahead and open both the lateral boarding door, and the rear loading door. Also extend the rear loading ramp.”
Trix did, then glanced over at Ma’et. “Anything more?”
“Nope. First day on the job, and you’ve done the first job successfully. Not perfectly, but pretty damn good for your first time piloting off planet. Go ahead and head back to talk with the Captain, and I’ll handle the rest.”
Trix unbuckled the acceleration harness (Though, she felt zero acceleration during the entire trip so she couldn’t fathom just WHY Ma’et had insisted on her buckling in) and moved past the much smaller woman as she left the cockpit.
In the back, Josh was already outside the ship, grabbing a handtruck. She watched as he pushed it up the loading ramp to the stack of boxes that contained the food and equipment she’d need for the next few weeks of existence here in space. “Why aren’t you using one of the gravity belts?” She gestured over to the wall where the belts were hanging.
“Eh, this stuff’s fairly light and those have a limited lifespan. I don’t want to burn out the Keplite cores on stuff we can just move by hand. They’re expensive.”
“Oh. What’s Keplite, anyway? Ji and Min have mentioned it a few times.” Trix glanced over at the large belts with their big circular pads in the middle.
Before Josh could answer, Alex walked in between them. “Ji, Min! We’re going to be converting the room across from yours back into crew quarters for Trix. Gonna need you two to move the Spider. Is there room here in the hangar for it?”
“It’ll fit better if we assemble it and use packing mode.” Ji countered, as he hopped out of the shuttle. “It’ll take a day or so. We’ve got it spread all out in there.”
Alex turned over to Trix and beckoned. “Follow me. Gonna give you the full tour while they’re unloading." He took a few steps back, then lifted his arms wide to gesture to their surroundings. "This is obviously the hangar bay. Shuttle's the big thing you were just flying. Below us is a small cargo hold, empty right now. Not gonna show you unless you happen to like large empty boring-ass boxes.” He raised an eyebrow, and Trix quickly shook her head. "Alright. Most of the shit in here is just maintenance tools and loading gear. Nothing exciting. Ramp to main transit corridor here."
They walked out into the hallway. “Okay, well through that door’s opposite the hangar is the fabber bay. The fabber is a huge machine that manufactures stuff for us, like a 3D printer. Do you guys have anything like that?” Trix shrugged, and Alex continued. “Well either way, it can make virtually anything from a bed to a bomb to a computer. The more complex and difficult items take a hell of a lot longer to make. It’s also a major power hog since the manufacturing process uses extremely powerful fields, both magnetic and force. In other words, if you need something and we didn’t bring it with you we can make it here.”
He walked down the hall a bit, and gestured to the doors on either side. “Launcher bays, 1 and 2. Normally we use ‘em to launch beacons, buoys, sensors, things like that into space. If someone tries to start shit with us we CAN use them to launch missiles but we have very few of those available. We’re not out here to get in fights, but if we have to defend ourselves we pack a big punch.” He opened one of the doors and walked inside. “The big hatch over there is the manual tube loader. The ship can auto-load various things but if we need to put something into space that isn’t already in storage, that’s where we do it. If Ji tells you to climb in yourself, he’s joking and you should hit him because it only exists to launch shit into space.”
Trix laughed at that, but she had learned enough of Ji’s sense of humor while working on the car to understand the sentiment. “Will I even be in here at all though?”
“Maybe. If something needs to be manually loaded, we use these. Back when we were at the derelict ship I had to send a battery over to help out while we planned our rescue. You might be asked to do the same.” Alex shrugged and lead her out into the hall. “Last thing here is the ship’s primary armament.” He reached over to the side of the hallway and pressed a hatch release. The compartment it lead to was incredibly small and tightly cramped.
“We don’t use it much outside of scaring off pirates or relieving stress, but this is our primary weapon out in space. Eight-chamber five meter long rotary railgun. Fires one round every 1.2 seconds that travel roughly a million kilometers per hour when fired stationary, or closer to 280 kilometers per second. It fires either solid armor-piercing unguided slugs or flak munitions that are used to produce clouds of metallic debris. The former will shred a ship’s armor and pulverize anything inside. The latter can overwhelm particle shields and damage exterior components without nearly as much penetration. The reason I’m saying all this to you,” He tapped the top of the cannon where it joined to the ship. “This thing’s got a super limited firing arc. Meaning that we can only shoot what we’re pointed at. If, by some miracle, we get into a fight out there then our ability to shoot back is gonna depend on your ability to fly the ship while facing the enemy.”
Trix swallowed heavily as she tried to imagine just how powerful this massive cannon was. She glanced over at the side of it, to the twin belts that fed in ammo. Each round it would fire was longer than her forearm and thicker than her waist.
“That’s the worst case scenario though. In reality, if we get into any shit out there, fighting is the LAST thing we want to do. Negotiation to avoid hostility first, escape second, fight last.” Alex shooed her out of the compartment. “That said if we encounter any low-yield junk out there then we’ll get some target practice in. If you’re game then we can let you try targeting for a bit and unload some kinetic mayhem while things are dull.” He grinned wickedly, as he manually pulled the hatch back into place, sliding two large locking levers into place.
“Okay, that’s it for this deck. There’s stairs on the far side leading up to the tech deck but the ladder here’s quicker.”
They climbed up the ladder, with Alex leading and Trix following. Her wings banged against the ceiling as she climbed, and it took her a few moments to get them tucked in tight enough to get through the hatch but with Alex’s help they got up there.
“Tech deck. Mostly. In the front of the ship here right under Bridge access is the exception, the pool room.” He opened the door and they walked in together. “Mainly used for observation but the pool there is great for relaxation. You can adjust the temperature with the controls on the wall there, goes from chilly to full on hot tub. Adjustable depth from 3 to 10 feet, and the pool walls are display panels. If you use a breather it’s fun to turn the display to external then go down underwater and relax while staring at the stars. Do you swim much?”
Trix nodded. “Sure, there’s a river a… couple kilometers? I think? I’m not good with converting distances yet. Anyway, it’s near the hab and we’d go there when I was younger and didn’t have as much to do in the fields.”
“Cool. Well, feel free to use it but just a word of warning you might want to check if anyone’s in first. Swimwear is optional and since the crew is a pretty tight family we don’t usually get embarrassed if we’re seen swimming in the buff.” Alex waved over at the control console. “If you’re not sure the big green button on the outside is the comm button, just ask if anyone’s using it.”
“Ji brought me in here when we came up to do the medical scans. He showed me Kiveyt from orbit for the first time. Do all human ships have a room like this?” Trix reached over to dip her hand into the water. It was quite warm to the touch.
“Nah. This ship wasn’t originally designed as a scout ship or survey ship. It was originally a yacht. Big luxury vehicle for rich people to fly around in space and have fun in. Throw parties. Most of the ridiculous amenities it has I got rid of ages ago, but that left a huge amount of space we filled up with all the launchers and sensors and whatnot. I kept the pool though because I love soaking after a long day.” He pressed the door control and they left the pool room.
“Just past the pool room on either side of the ship we have collection dishes for D-space particles. Those are EVA only, so you won’t be dealing with those. They let us collect extremely powerful particles which lead back here.” Alex spoke as he walked, and turned the corner into a much, much larger room.
“This is the ship’s main power supply. Charged particles enter the torus reactor and discharge energy which is converted into electrical power and routed through the ship. Those bottles over there…” He gestured to four massive grey metal canisters on the wall. “Contain the actual particles. They’re made of the strongest materials we have because if one ruptured, the ship would instantly explode from the inside out. Don’t worry,” Alex quickly raised his hands. “The chances of that happening are virtually impossible. This is the single most well-protected location on the ship.”
He gestured to the other side of the large room. “Over there’s the terminals that Min is usually at. She and Ji are in charge of all engineering. That means power, propulsion, all computer systems, and the like. Well, the physical parts of them that is. Ma’et is our computer geek when it comes to integration, programming, and all the fun software shit.”
Alex left the room, and gestured to the other side. “I’m sure you’re familiar with medical over there. Let’s do us both a favor and not have to go there much. Otherwise I’m pretty sure Kyshe will gut me.” He didn’t stop to show her inside, and they reached the main staircase. “The back half of the ship on this deck is all propulsion access and maintenance. I’m more or less our damage control guy, along with Ji and Min. For them it’s because they’re smart as shit and for me it’s because I had to learn how to maintain my own ship. Most common damage out here is stray micro meteors or debris while we’re parked and the particle shields are down. Sometimes worn out components inside. Again, no EVA for you so the only thing you’ll need to worry about for DC is being an assistant to one of us while we fix shit.”
They went up the stairwell to the uppermost of the three floors. “There used to be an observation bubble above us, but I had it removed because it was useless. Even if I covered it with ablative plating it was a massive wart on top of the ship that served zero practical purpose. Anyway, the top floor here is where you’ll spend 90% of your time on the ship. Back here…” Alex started walking to the rear of the ship, and walked through a large open doorway. “Mess hall. We generally have two kinds of meals here - when we’re on long deployment, the food extruder over there can produce rations. They’re not amazing but they’re quick both to make and eat. It’ll also make reasonable meat and dairy substitutes. If you want a real meal though we usually keep the good stuff in deep freeze so it takes a fair amount of time to be ready. Other than that the bev dispenser is over there. Water and various juices on tap all the time, alcohol is restricted only to meals only. We all get together for breakfast and dinner though, since it’s just a good way to socialize. Tonight expect a big meal in celebration.”
He walked out of the mess, and opened a door to a large open area. “Rec room. Not used a whole lot because most of us use haptic suits for exercise and recreation but we don’t have a suit that’ll fit you or your wings, so I want you to be in here twice a week at least. Ma’et is a great partner for any exercise that doesn’t involve fighting, unless you like bruises in which case she’ll happily go a few rounds with gloves on. Pilots don’t get the level of exercise you’re used to on the planet working fields so exercise up here will be pretty damn vital.”
She looked around the room, then hurried to catch up to the captain as he walked out. “On the other side of the hall from the Mess is general storage. Cleaning supplies, a small laundry unit if the one in your room quits working, random odds and ends. Also a few extra bunks just in case we need them. Unfortunately I am going to have to have you spend one night in here while we get your room cleaned up and ready for you.” He walked in, and over to one of the walls. “Bunk folds down from here. Looks, uh…” He glanced at the fold-down bed and back at Trix. “Looks tight. Do me a favor and see if you’re gonna be OK there?”
It was very close, but Trix laid down on the sleeping pad and adjusted until she found a good comfortable spot. “For just one night, this will do…”
“Alright, no worries then. We’ll have your room ready quick as we can.” She got off the pad and Alex gestured for her to follow. “Quarters themselves are here, 4 on either side of the main hallway. Myself, Josh, Ma’et, and Amanda on the right in that order. Ji, Min, Your quarters, and the last was converted into a mechanical room for Par. Speaking of…”
He walked into the last room and knocked on a large hatch. “Par, would it be alright if I introduced our newest shipmate?”
“Of course, Captain.” The hatch slid silently open revealing a large, intricate array. Circuit boards were laid out in rows and wires ran between them in perfectly neat, ordered channels. In the center of it all was a large oblong egg-looking object. “Trix, may I present to you Parathanelias Sigma-822.”
Several rows of lights lit up along the side of the egg, and the pleasant musical voice she’d heard so often came from a small speaker alongside it. “It is a pleasure to meet you in person, Trksehnoarala.”
Trix stared at the open hatch then gestured behind her. “I thought you were in those floating metal balls…?”
“The spheres you mention are my remotes. None of them are large enough to house my primary systems. In a way, they are my eyes, ears, and limbs. My true nature is integration here within the ship itself, and I make up for my limited mobility in person by having the greatest mobility of any other member of the crew.”
“He also has an avatar in VR of an organic human, but most of the time he uses the floating spheres to interact with us and the rest of the world. His core,” Alex gestured to the egg-like central object, “houses his base personality and his most important memories. The rest of this is extra storage for less critical information. I’m a bit jealous because his most important memories will always be preserved forever in perfect clarity. The rest of us get to have our memories fade with time, but his will be eternal.”
Alex stood there mutely for a moment then shook his head. “Anyway. Back to the tour. Thanks Par!”
“My pleasure.” The hatch slid silently shut and Alex and Trix left the room. “This room has been empty for long enough I pretty much gave it over to Ji and Min for a long while.” Alex walked into the room next to Par’s. “It’s kind of a mess but we’re going to get it cleaned up then it’ll be yours.”
There was no bed in the room, and the tables against the walls were covered with electronics and quickboards. In the center of the room, a huge metal contraption was spread out. Eight large jointed legs were wired in to a big central circular turret. Above that, a multitude of ‘limbs’ extended out - one a large grasper with clawed metal fingers, another ending with an odd cone-shaped implement with a blackened tip. A third was a huge metal pipe jutting out, and a fourth looked to be a number of small openings to place something into.
Trix gestured to it, “What is THAT thing?”
“That’s the Spider. It’s a long-time project the Twins have been working on. Pretty much since they joined the crew, really. It was meant to be a mechanical walker for the military but… well, that’s their story to tell.” Alex snorted. “There’s going to be enough time to go into the details later. Point is, before we even start leaving the system we’re gonna move this out, get a full king sized bed in here for you, some more storage, and so on. That door,” He gestured to a door on the other side of the room, “Leads to a hygiene unit. Full on shower, no bath but if you want to soak the Pool’s down a floor. Aside from no tub it has a deluxe toilet, sink, and a small cleaning unit for clothes.”
Trix cautiously stepped around the large disassembled robot, and opened the door to peer inside. The hygiene unit was much larger than she’d expected, and she was grateful to see that most of the facilities was familiar to her.
“Okay, one last stop and it’s the most important.” Alex walked out into the hallway and Trix rushed to catch up, almost tripping as she hopped over a piece of scrap cable along the floor. “I’m sure this will become your second home on the ship real fast. The bridge.”
They walked down the hall through a small access corridor into a large, wide open space. A large chair sat in the center with a number of controls and articulating arms present on the back. In front of it, a number of control panels were arranged in rows. The front of the bridge and both sides were dominated by massive window screens that showed the area the ship was currently facing. She could see one screen to the side with a display showing Kiveyt, first as a small dot with a zoomed-in and blown up image next to it.
“The door back there in the corner leads to a briefing room, nothing special there but a table and chairs. The big chair in the middle is mine, but if you ask super nicely I’ll let you sit in it.” Alex grinned, and pointed at the console in the very center of the bridge, in front of the Captain’s chair. “But that station over there is primary navigation. Josh is there quite a lot of the time, though just as often I navigate from the Captain’s Chair or Ma’et controls the ship from her neural interface. As of now, though, I bequeath ownership of it unto you - for the next few weeks, at least.”
Trix walked around the bridge staring at everything. The control consoles were smooth, rounded and sleek in their presentation. Each one had a large keyboard in front covered with the strange runes of the Humans’ language. Various other instruments and implements were present at each station, but at hers she smiled gratefully to see that the keys had already changed and had more familiar and recognizable letters in place of the Humans odd script. The layout was definitely weird, and she knew it was going to take time and effort to grow accustomed but at the very least she would be able to understand what she was doing as she learned. Even better, the seat lacked the same high back that the other seats had, which would have been pressed tightly and uncomfortably against her wings.
She glanced back at Alex, who just nodded at her. Encouraged, she took a seat and glanced around. “This is mine.” She whispered it and then let her wings spread out with pleasure as she realized that from here, from this station, she would be the one personally controlling the entire massive vehicle behind her. It lacked the flight stick of the shuttle or the handle controls of her aircar, and in a way she felt disappointed she wouldn’t be able to manually control the ship the same way she could the smaller vehicles. But as she looked around her and rested her hands on the cool surface of the console, she felt something else. A thrill of anticipation at the thought of being the one in control of this massive ship and everyone inside of it.
Alex climbed several steps up to the captain’s chair on its elevated dais, and took a seat directly behind her. The sight of a winged alien in front of him at the nav console with the stars stretching out above and beyond her was a strange one, but a pleasant one. He tried to think of a witty quip to finish the tour with, but failing that he settled for a much simpler one instead.
“Welcome aboard, Pilot.”
—--
“Okay, before we get started, I believe that this is a special occasion warranting a toast.” Alex sat at the head of the large table at the mess, with the other six organic members of the crew assembled further down. “To our new pilot trainee!”
“Here Here!” “To Trix!” “To our Trainee!”
Alex took a sip of his whisky, and sighed in pleasure. “God that hits the spot. Okay everyone, dig in.”
The dinner was an odd affair, mostly because every single member was wearing their visor. Trix could not speak English, and the crew couldn’t speak her native tongue. Masks which would automatically translate couldn’t be worn during a meal so the solution was to have real-time speech to text appearing on everyone’s visor. Trix, who never had worn a visor before, had a difficult time getting the display to appear just right in front of her eyes but she and Par had gotten it dialed in.
Trix glanced at the array of food in front of her. Some items looked familiar, others completely foreign, and none of it smelled quite right. She gestured to the food. “None of this is from Kiveyt. Is it safe for me to eat it?”
“I went through our entire comestible database while we were on the planet. Surprisingly there’s almost no Terran food you can’t eat.” Josh had a massive burrito nearly as long as Ma’et’s arm on the plate in front of him, and he spoke while dabbing hot sauce over it. “All of our Macronutrients are completely interchangeable. Most Micronutrients are as well. There’s a few exotic vitamins and amino acids that you need that we can’t provide, but we have supplements from the planet that’ll handle those.”
“Oh.” Trix glanced around at the table, trying to decide what to eat. The spread was, per Alex’s suggestion, extremely large and quite diverse. “I’m not sure where to start then.”
Min picked up a large platter with a circular dish on it. “Far as I’m concerned the best place to start is with Pizza. It’s one of the most widely loved foods throughout Terran space.” She dumped a slice onto the plate in front of Trix, while Ji slid a very tall glass of water over to her, alongside an odd reddish looking beverage.
“Give the fruit punch a try too. It’s much more sweet than the juice you were serving down on the planet. A lot more mild too.” He suggested, and gestured to another plate. “Also? Tacos are never a bad choice.”
Trix reached out and picked up one of the odd, semi-circular items. Ji grabbed one as well, and bit into it with gusto. Trix mimicked the motion, crunching into the hard shell. It was quite interesting, tasteless at first as she bit into the shell and the lettuce, but then the spiced meat hit her tongue. It was quite mild but not unpleasant. She chewed on it and gulped down a mouthful. “Not bad.” She took another bite.
The taco vanished quickly, and she glanced down at the slice of Pizza next. “Like this, Trix.” Min gestured to pick it up by the crust, putting her fingers in front of it to prevent it from flopping down. Trix followed Min’s example, and took a huge bite. This one was even milder, almost disappointingly so. “Not much flavor to this one. Is all your food really light like this?”
The humans glanced around at that. “Y’know, Sophie mentioned our rations were tasteless. They have a pretty strong cinnamon taste to ‘em.” Alex sat back thoughtfully as he nursed the glass of whisky in his hand. “The food we had down on the planet was all pretty strong flavors…”
Josh handed the bottle of hot sauce in his hand over to Trix. “Try a dab of this. It adds a kick to some foods.”
Trix took the bottle, and put a few drops of it on the slice of pizza in front of her. She took another bite, and her eyes lit up. The next few bites all had more hot sauce each, and the crust itself ended up practically drenched in it. “Thanks, Josh. That was delicious.”
The rest of the crew was staring at her and she shrunk back slightly at their intense scrutiny. Had she done something wrong? She hadn’t ever offended them during any meals back on the planet, so the sudden shift in attention was jarring and quite uncomfortable.
Ji whistled at the sight of the alien hungrily wofling down the slice of pizza covered in bright spicy sauce. “Here, try some of that on a taco next!” He picked up another shell and offered it to her.
Trix reached out and took the taco, this time pouring a hefty amount of sauce on it. Eating this one was much messier, and she could feel the hot sauce dribbling down the side of her mouth as she took a huge bite. Min handed her a paper towel, and she embarrassedly wiped away the errant food. “Thanks, Min. That was great too, Ji.”
“Hold up.” Alex stood up and walked over to one of the cupboards, pulling out another bottle of sauce. “I’m curious now. This is a lot hotter than the sauce you’ve been trying thus far. See if it’s to your liking. Just, start with a very small amount. A little goes a LONG way.” He walked back to the table, placing the bottle next to Trix. She studied it briefly, mostly the logo - a caricature of a human whose head appeared to be on fire.
“Um, Okay. Should I try it with the Pizza or the Taco?” She glanced between the two dishes she’d already tried. “Either one. Whichever you prefer.” was Alex’s reply.
Trix reached out and grabbed a third Taco, opening up the bottle. Immediately she could smell the fragrant sauce within, and she carefully poured a small amount into the shell. She cautiously took a bite and chewed thoughtfully.
“Too hot?” Alex suggested, but she shook her head. “No. Just…” She poured more sauce on the taco, and ate the rest in only a few bites. “Whew. Sorry, Captain Alexander. That was incredible! I’ve never tasted anything like it before.”
“Captain Alexander just sounds weird. Call me Alex or Al. Or ‘Captain’ if you really, really need to use my rank for whatever reason.” Alex sat down, and chuckled. “But that’s interesting. Very, very interesting. That sauce there?” He gestured towards the bottle. “It’s made with a chemical called ‘Capsaicin’. To humans it’s a powerful spice. Too much of it causes a painful burning sensation that lingers. We normally dilute it to make it more palatable and less painful.”
Trix glanced at the bottle. “I guess that explains the fire on the little picture here.” She grabbed another slice of the pizza, and drizzled the sauce on top.
“Three tacos and two slices of pizza?” Ma’et was impressed as she saw how much food the Avian was packing away.
“The disadvantage of those muscular bodies.” Josh waved his hand towards Trix. “They require all the calories that a Human does and more. Back on the planet I learned their species used to be a lot smaller, but after developing animal husbandry and reliable sources of higher calorie foods they bulked up pretty quick.”
Trix, for her part, slicked off the second slice of pizza with gusto. She grabbed a fourth taco, and liberally poured the spicy sauce all over, before wolfing that down as well. She grabbed the fruit juice that Ji had offered her… the ‘punch’? And downed it almost as quickly.
“I hope after all this is over, we can buy some more of that sauce. I definitely want the others back at home to try it.” She licked her lips, and sighed with contentment. “This juice too. I like how sweet it is.”
“Birds are immune to Capsaicin.” Josh murmured softly, but it was picked up by the visor and translated perfectly. “I wonder what the chances are that space-birds would be too?”
—--
“Slide the jack under that joint there.” Trix did as instructed, wheeling the small hydraulic device under the ‘spider’s’ massive leg. “Great. Just gotta line up the leg with where the servos join in…” Ji and Min lifted the leg and immediately began connecting up cables and lines. After all the connections were made, Ji braced himself against the wall and shoved - hard - against the leg, firmly connecting the mechanical rotary joint into place.
“Okay, testing.” Min walked over to the console and began punching in codes. Like the other six limbs before it, this one shook slightly then began to flex, twist, and move around. “Range of motion is nominal. Motors are all showing peak. Locking joints and anchor bolt systems are green.”
Ji wiped off some sweat from his forehead, and leaned back against the wall. “I knew it was a mistake to work on it up here. At least if we put it in the hangar we could have lowered the gravity.”
“It would have been in the way during the rescue op, and we had enough shit going on then we didn’t need to add ‘reassemble a multi-ton walking modular platform’ to the list.” Min gestured with her head, not even glancing over at her brother. “Man up. Trix hasn’t even broken a sweat.”
“I don’t sweat.” Trix mumbled, as she stared at the massive machine. “This thing is crazy. Puts my car to shame.”
“Yeah, our pride and joy. Together we’ve spent decades refining it.” Min glanced over at Trix with a broad smile. “The modular bay on top has been my focus, while Ji’s been adjusting and perfecting the leg and motion systems.”
“What’s it for?”
“Well, right now it’s kind of in between intended uses.” Ji walked over to a large shelf and gestured to the assorted objects there. “With our original plans it was going to have a bunch of swappable options. Right now, it has short and long range assault armaments and a plasma cutter for breaching sealed doors. A basic military drone capable of adapting to all kinds of situations.”
Trix stared at the array of weapons in front of her. “So this is what the human military uses to fight with?”
“Nah.” Min set down the quickboard and walked over to the huge machine. “We envisioned it as a multi-purpose response unit. Capable of dropping in from outside the atmosphere an landing anywhere, going anywhere. Dealing with any situation that could possibly arise. It’s an all-terrain support mech and its modular nature would have made it able to respond to nearly any situation. And it was rejected by the military.”
“What? Why?”
Ji held up a hand and ticked off his fingers. “One, it’s more expensive to drop one of these than a squad of soldiers. Nevermind the fact that it can do 10 people’s worth of work without putting even a single person in danger. Two, it’s too big to be fired out of normal launchers. Adding new launchers to ships would have been a significant amount of work and cost that the navy wasn’t willing to foot the bill. Three, we didn’t have any money after developing it. Meaning we couldn’t bribe anyone in the government into pressuring the military to work with us.”
“Four, they already have hover tanks and artillery and we couldn’t convince them that our system was superior to those.” Min sighed, and threw herself into a chair.
“Hovering is cheating though.” Ji glared at his sister.
“Cheating? What?” Trix just looked bewildered at this.
“Hovering isn’t all-terrain. Hovering is NO terrain.”
“Oh.” Trix took a seat in a nearby chair herself. “So did the captain buy this then?”
“Nope. See, we were finishing up Uni and started developing the Spider, but we didn’t really have the money to actually MAKE one. We had all the plans and all the research on our side but not the raw materials or the money to get those raw materials.” Ji pulled out a stick of gum and popped it in his mouth. “At first we tried going straight to the military which was a huge mistake, they just made a million excuses and told us to get lost. Then we tried approaching some weapon dev companies for funding. They basically told us they’d fund it in exchange for all the rights to production and we’d get whatever they felt was fair. Which when we pressed on a figure, wasn’t much.”
Trix glanced over at the massive mech. “But it got made, obviously.”
“Yup. When we weren’t sure what to do, a buddy of ours mentioned that Al was looking for an engineering team. We can do starship engineering.” Min grabbed the quickboard and extended one of the spider’s legs towards her, so she could kick her feet up on it. “Matter of fact, this ship’s a thing of beauty. Al is a complete doofus but he takes fantastic care of the ship. When we came on we gave him a list of everything that should change. He sat down with us, went over it point by point, and even though it ended up costing over half a million credits he gave us full authorization to make every single change we suggested.”
“So after we did a stint working as engineers we joined up as crew.” Ji had an odd smile on his face. “Since then, we’ve put the money we made from working here towards building this thing. We actually had it completed but then I had this idea of using an array of microservo actuators instead of a larger servo to give us a lot more fine control over the joints. That didn’t work, like, at all but when we used a combination of them we managed to find just the right ratio that gives us twice the amount of precision in each joint, which lets us use the-”
“ANYWAY.” Min interrupted her Brother before he could get too deep into the weeds. “We had it built, with the original armaments we envisioned, but Al suggested making a module for mining and sampling. We brought it in here in order to disassemble it to make the servo adjustments and while we were at it we were going to be replacing the actual weapons with a mining beam, core sample collector, and an array of sensors. Now though we’re going to put it in storage for a while. We got much more important things to take care of now.”
“Oh.” Trix had begun to tune Ji out when he launched into his diatribe. “But what do you mean joined up as crew? You were already crew, weren’t you?”
Min swung her foot down, and gestured to the ship. “It’s different. There’s employees… and then there’s crew. Right now you’re an employee. You’re working with us, you’re out here, but your home’s back with your Teff. Right?”
Trix nodded.
“Well, when you’re crew… this is your home. We’re all family out here. I don’t know as much about the whole Teff thing but I think it’s sort of similar. This ship’s our home, the crew is our family. Alex may be a childish idiot but he’s loyal to his crew like nothing else.” Min stood up and walked over to put her hand on her brother’s shoulder. “When we worked here and started to see how well he treats his people, we felt like we could really belong here. He asked if we’d like to join up, so we did. Best decision we ever made.”
“Yup. He treats the crew as well as he treats the ship.” Ji gestured around him. “Working for him paid well. Working as crew, we don’t get paid regularly but we get a cut out of every mission and that cut is HUGE. That’s how we could afford to actually build the spider in the first place.”
“Ah. So if he invited me along, does that mean he wants me to join the crew too?” Trix wasn’t sure how she felt about that. Joining another family was commonplace for males who left their Teff to join others, but incredibly rare for females.
“Dunno. He’s hired on specialists in the past who’ve come and gone. And he’s invited people to join up who said no and that was that.” Ji shrugged and pressed the release on the hydraulic press, letting it collapse down. “C’mon, we should get the last leg attached. Then we can pack it up and use a grav collar to move it down to the hangar. Don’t want to make you stay in that cramped storage room again tonight.”
“Yeah, I tried to stretch my wings in the morning and I banged up against one of the shelves. Really not looking forward to that again.” Trix grumbled at the memory, and stood up. “Okay, what more do we need done to get this over with?”
—--

28F, had my first abnormal pap result last week with HPV 16+ and ASC-US. Luckily, they were able to get me in yesterday for the colposcopy, which I was extremely nervous about, but I trusted my NP. Not anymore apparently.
First of all, this office knows my history. I cry at every pap smear. I cried having my implant removed from my arm (they couldn’t get it out, and even though my arm was numbed, it just psychologically freaked me out). I’ve told them I have depression, PTSD, and sexual trauma. So naturally I was really worried about the colposcopy and my emotional wellbeing, so I called the office and asked if they could prescribe me something for the procedure because of my anxiety and trauma. They prescribed HYDROXYZINE!!!? Which is an antihistamine. Which I already take and is on my medication list. I didn’t realize what it was at first because they called it by the brand name.
I took it 1 hr before my appointment, along with the 800mg of ibuprofen that they recommended, but the hydroxyzine didn’t help my anxiety at all. I could not believe they didn’t even look at my medication list or prescribe me something stronger. They took my BP and it was 166/83, which is the highest I’ve ever seen it. I always have perfect BP. The nurse said, “Are you nervous?” And I told her the hydroxyzine didn’t help and reminded her of my sexual trauma, but she just kinda shrugged. NP comes in; I remind her of my sexual trauma as well. Same thing, just dismisses it. I feel like I should have advocated better for myself and directly asked if they had anything in the office they could give me, but I’m so fucking passive.
As the NP is explaining the procedure to me, I just burst into tears and start having a panic attack. My husband was there and comforted me, but the NP told me to go ahead and put my feet in the stirrups. I felt rushed, and I knew I had to calm myself down, so I tried to dissociate and just stared at the fluorescent light above me, but once she started scraping, I felt so violated and it reminded me of all the times I felt violated. I cried the whole time.
At the end, I asked my questions, but didn’t receive very many answers or reassurance. They ended up doing the biopsy too because I had a lot of “white fluff” apparently. I’m also freaked out because I had a wart near my anus (they removed it during this visit), so I asked her if I needed to do any follow up with that because I’m worried about it being internal too and the possibility of anal cancer down the road, but she didn’t have any answers. I’ve also been complaining about pelvic pain and brought it up again to her, but she didn’t have any suggestions or answers for that either. I had to press her and ask things like, “Could it be cervix inflammation?” and she finally said that the results should be able to tell that. So crazy! This woman retires at the end of the year; how could she not answer so many of my questions? I know it’s in part a waiting game because of the biopsy results, but it also felt like she didn’t feel like doing her job.
I guess I just wanted to rant but I also feel so scared, spiraling at the scary C word cancer, and worried about it in multiple places. I know that the chances are extremely low that this has already advanced to cancer. I go to my routine pap smears and this my first abnormal one. I guess I just wanted to hear my provider reassure me and wanted to be treated like a human with feelings.

This is for those that may have the urge to fix it yourself and know that ointments and cryotherapy leaves massive scars with the equivalency of spreading it just like extracting yourself because the doctors don’t know what it is unless you tell them. Even then, they don’t know how to treat it because it’s not as normal as genital warts or herpes. So take this advice as you’d like but understand. Everyone is different and everyone has different immune systems and have more or less MC then other people. I’ve noticed MC can be shaped differently for different people but generally speaking, all have a “pearl.”
How to extract:
So when you extract, take the circle from the acne tool and go over the MC as if you were to pop a pimple, then pressed down hard, and slowly drag UNDER the MC. This ensures that the thin skin is torn along with the pearl. I personally found success with using this method while wearing gloves in immediately taking a alcohol soaked swab to the bleeding area. Dispose of the pearl separately from everything. clean acne utensil each and every time you self extract a singular MC. Using the needle part of the utensil, can or may cause spreading through the bleeding. In which I don’t recommend. Clean wounds with 91% isopropyl alcohol and Bactine (separate swabs). Change out gloves for each and everytime you do these steps (will go through a lot). Cover wounds with hydrocolloid patches (used for acne). Leave on for 2 days and then remove to let dry out. You can shower with them on. Shower using Hibiclens. Don’t touch extracted spots with towel. Use paper towels to dry. Don’t touch spots with general towel when drying your body. Highly recommend powdering spots with baby powder if in genital area due to the moisture. Moisture and uncleanliness helps MC thrive like Genital Warts.
This method worked for me, along with taking Zinc pills to help boost my immune system. I’ve had one pop up randomly after 5 months of clearance but using the method above. They do not stand a chance against you. This is a mental battle, just make sure you’re ready to do whatever you can to accomplish this “chicken pox” derived infection.
Best of luck to you all!!

Well, Hi all! again! 4Th Wall here, I figured since I just got power back, I might as well play some catch up on both series. Hope you enjoy this episode!!
Yup, I fucked that up. This is a repost with the correct Episode number, LOL! It's been a while since I've done that.
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Benjamin smiled, watching the girls skip ahead of him. Today was a testing day of sorts for him. Unwilling to release firearms into this world haphazardly, yet unwilling to go without them as a backup; he had pulled from one of his sister’s favorite video games. He had “melted down” his bowie knife, repurposing the metal to be used in his latest creation. The final product rode on his hip like a short sword, but Ben was satisfied in the design when the vast majority of the people he passed ignored it as just another adventurer’s blade. Benjamin hoped, that with the existence of Majik, that he would be able to pass off any… peculiarities... as the realm of the supernatural.

The three of them arrived at the tailor’s establishment, and the girls were met with a customary indifference that seemed to present itself when a slave’s “master” was present. The moment Benjamin entered, the seamstress ceased to pay attention to the girls, and instead addressed him directly, “Ah, The Forgemaster’s Protégé. What can I do for you this day.” She said cooly, bowing slightly in welcome. “I’m here commission some clothing for these two, a reward for good service.” Benjamin began. It was technically true; the success of the forge had afforded him much more coin than a mere apprentice could have made. Qort had taken him on as a true partner, and Benjamin earned enough to comfortably afford to cloth his “slaves” in whatever he chose.

Some stigma’s remained however, and the seamstress seemed to glare sideways at the girls as they perused the fabrics adorning the walls. “Is that wise? A slave could lose her place with such gifts.” she asked, her polite tone barely hiding her disapproval. Benjamin sighed internally, ‘oh for fucks sake’ he groaned in his own mind before putting on facad, “I find that proper reward, afforded on the right servant can result in” he paused, projecting a smug expression and blatantly looking the girls up and down. “a profound dedication to their duties” he finished with a satisfied smile as the seamstress covered her mouth with a hand to hide a smile of her own. The gambit worked, and the Seamstress was obviously satisfied that the “Aereesen slave whores” were being properly “used”. “Ah, I understand. What did you have in mind for them.” She practically moaned back at Benjamin. ‘This hag needs a good pounding….’ Benjamin’s inner monologue threatened to crack his facade, “That’s the fun part, my good lady. It’s their choice. The surprise is half the excitement.” He chuckled.

The seamstress openly smiled at him this time before nodding and stepping over to the two girls. Benjamin breathed a sigh of relief as she seemed to treat them at least marginally more warmly. The old racist bag didn’t need to know that Benjamin was secretly building a small nest egg for his girls, or that his sending them out to do errands for him was how he was teaching them about money, value, and the application of Mathematics. She also didn’t need to know that the full Cutlery set that she had purchased last week had been made by Vi’s own hand as her first full solo commission set. Benjamin had stamped his “mark” on them, because slaves were not allowed to own anything, including their own work; but Vi had begun with raw steel and finished with one of the finest cooking knife sets he had seen in this world or his.

Benjamin settled onto a bench outside, using the excuse of wanting to enjoy the morning air to afford his girls some privacy. Now that Viola and Valtrya were eating a healthy diet, and the right calorie amount; they had blossomed into absolute bombshells. Their hair had recovered, and both sported long flowing locks that boasted a silky satin black color and texture that betrayed hints of deep royal purple. The color reminded Benjamin of one of those expensive custom car paints that changed color depending on the lighting.

Their skin recovered almost as quickly as their hair. The sickly, scabbed look was quickly replaced with the same satin quality as their hair to the touch, but with a light grey coloring that almost seemed to tease the edge of hinting at a greyish purple. A dense pattern of Small freckles of the same dark, almost royal, purple as the highlights in their hair frolicked on both girl’s cheeks, and down the sides of their necks. Because of their early lack of understanding on modestly, Ben knew that those freckles traveled much further. The sad truth was that Benjamin understood fully why Aereesen’s were the prize of slavers and brothels, and he silently prayed that he could give them enough self-worth and skill to have a better life than that, once he got them out of the Principality.

A door’s soft creaking broke Benjamin from his thoughts as the two sisters stepped out smiling, “Get everything you need?” he asked standing as the three of them departed the establishment. Val nodded vigorously, and Vi smiled as she spoke, “I think so, but I had to practically beg the woman to stop showing us lingerie… what did you tell her?” Benjamin felt his cheeks heat as he responded, “What I had to. The old hag doesn’t get enough at home. It’s not my fault that your ‘enthusiasm’ is in the forge and your studies, not between the sheets. I didn’t lie to her, I just let her draw her own conclusions, sorry.”

Vi’s eyes twinkled for a second, “Oh,” She smirked, “Thaaat’s why she broke out the silk. Some of her options were..” She blatantly bit her lip at Benjamin. “You didn’t…” He asked in shock, and Vi lifted up on her tippy toes to brush her lips against his ear, “Not telling” she purred, setting Bens senses on fire. She backed up a step, openly smirking at his beet red face. “But your expression is adorable… My Lord” She stated the last two words with a deep sultry tone, knowing that Ben couldn’t scold her in public before taking his hand, “May we visit the bazar next? Val saw some jewelry she wanted to look at.” Benjamin gave her a pointed look, that turned into a smile as she beamed at him, “Ok, sounds good. I need to pick up some food for the week.”

It was later that afternoon when the three of them left the bazar. They found Jukha waiting on the bench in front of their home. “Jukha! How are you!” Benjamin called, clasping the Orc’s hand firmly as the girls rushed inside to put up their purchases. Jukha reciprocated, if somewhat stiffly, to the strange to him gesture. “Benjamin, it is good to see you well.” His tone stopped Ben in his tracks, “What is it. Is your wife, ok?”
Jukha shook his head, “Vilora is well, but I have been tasked with finding you.” He said carefully, “The slaver, the one you dueled for those two,” he nodded to Vi and Val as they stepped back out of the building, “The Heir of The Romoregin house is here. He has lodged an official demand for satisfaction, and he brought a champion.”

Benjamin stiffened, “Another duel? You said an ‘official demand’… what happens if I refuse.” Jukha winced at Ben’s tone, “It is an archaic practice of my people, rarely remembered, and even more rarely demanded. You cannot deny a satisfaction claim, but should you prevail, no further claims can be made upon your person. I am sorry Benjamin, but if you flee or refuse, your life is forfeit; and your property goes to the claimant.” Jukha looked pointedly at Viola and Valtrya. “The young puke has put me in danger as well, if I do not deliver you and them to the duel, I can be detained. If they torture me….” Benjamin’s eyes widened before hardening in understanding. “Jukha…” He turned to find Viola standing next to him, with his musket in one arm and his ammunition bag in the other, and sighed, “Fuck”. He loaded his musket with a single roundball cartridge this time, unwilling to fire buck and ball in the town streets. He pealed the ball out of the paper wading after pouring the poweder, reaching into his haversack to retrieve a small round patch made of pillow ticking. Jukha looked on in mild fascination as Benjamin spit on the cloth patch before wrapping the ball in it and ramming the whole thing down the barrel. It wasn’t much, but it reduce windage, ensuring at least reasonable enough accuracy from the smoothbore to keep from hitting innocent bystanders. It would also virtually eliminate blow-by, upping the chamber pressure and giving him a little more velocity. “I’m ready.”

The four of them entered the small city square to be met with Qort and three Org guards. These soldiers wore different insignia that Benjamin had been taught were the mark of the capital. “Beenjaymen Shayfe” one of them butchered his name, “I am.” Ben nodded firmly, the other guard nodded, “And your two slaves, good. Has Jukha informed you of the proceedings.” Benjamin scowled, “A legalized way to attempt a revenge killing? Yea, I’ve been told.” Ben didn’t bother to hide his vitriol, “So I have to kill a motherfucker for defending myself from his father?”

“Not quite. The Heir has brought a champion. The rules are simple, all forms of combat are allowed” The first guard began as the second one began chaining the wrists of Viola and Valtrya. Benjamin began to move before thinking, only to be held back by Jukha, “Peace albino. They must do this. Fighting them will cause a forfeit.” Benjamin looked at the terrified faces of the two girls. He forced himself to calm down outwardly, but Benjamin could feel the rage building. He had worked so hard to save those two, to get them out.. now some snot nosed brat was going to try to kill him because his father didn’t know when to fuck off. Benjamin stepped out from around the guards. The “heir” was a young Durr. Ben had no frame of reference for age, but the Heir was substantially shorter, and his facial tentacles were almost mere buds. Beside him stood a crimson colossus, the same species as the Hunter he had shot saving Jukha. He was taller than that female, and was wearing plate armor, gilded in silver. He hefted a great sword of some kind and smiled openly at Benjamin. It was not a pleasant expression. “Ah, so You’re the puke I’ll be cleaning from my blade. I am Krastorin. Come here, pale one, I’ll make it quick.”

Benjamin looked him over, subtly shifting into a shooting stance but keeping his musket looking like he was resting the butt of a spear on the ground. “You look accomplished, what makes you do the bidding of the boy.” He asked, blatant scorn on his tone. The Young Durr flinched, his small tentacle buds writhing violently. “H’Dare Yee!” he bellowed, voice cracking with the strain of fury, “Aye’ll ‘ave Yee Head on Me’Wall!!”
Benjamin ignored him, focusing on the Hellirine. The man looked back at the boy with a raised eyebrow, “The young puke promised me one of those.” He pointed at Vi and Val, who had reverted to their former trembling submissive postures that Ben had met them in. “It appears that they are as well kept as claimed. I look forward to sampling them.” He leered. Benjamin looked over at the Young Durr and found his face a mixture of relief and anger. ‘Ah, lied about daddy’s slaves.’ He turned to the soldier standing next to him, “Is the duel on?” he growled.

“Combatants! Begin!” was the Soldiers response, and the crimson mercenary lifted his sword from his shoulders advancing forward with a long confident stride, “at last, let’s get this over wi..” a clap of thunder echo’d through the Feral wood, and most of the crowd cried out in surprise as Benjamin disappeared, seemingly behind a bubble of fire, and brimstone. The single round ball ignored the mercenary’s plate armor. Punching straight through as the soft lead mushroomed out into a ragged disk that measured almost an inch and a half. The mangled projectile, still travelling at almost half the speed of sound, eviscerated the chest cavity of the Mercenary before blowing a one foot wide hole out of the crimson man’s back. The exit wound missed Krastorin’s spine by an inch, but it didn’t matter. The projectile embedded itself into a post, thankfully missing any bystanders by mere inches in some cases. The Young Durr, who was standing just behind and to the side of his champion, was screaming as he pawed at the bits of pale yellow blood, bones, and fragments of internal organs now covering him from head to toe.

Benjamin handed the smoking musket to Jukha, drawing his short sword and walking over to a sputtering, choking, and coughing Krastorin. The Hellirine lay face down on the ground, having fallen that way from the momentum of his initial advance. The back of Benjamins mind was sickly amused as he remembered the old Hollywood trope of bullets throwing people backward, and a pinch of regret sparked in his soul as his opponent death rattled. He stepped up to the Heir, resting the blade against his neck, “Are we done here. Be a better man than your father and learn when to save your own life.” The Young Durr froze, staring up at him in abject terror for several moments as a puddle formed at his feet. Benjamin opened his mouth to speak again when the boy simply passed out, falling into the puddle of his own mess as his mind refused to stay conscious.

Benjamin turned to walk back towards Jukha and the girls. “Unchain them.” Benjamin’s tone could have frozen a raging forge’s inferno. To his surprise, two of the soldiers drew their weapons on him, “You need to come with us. All Touched must be registered with...” Benjamin pointed his short sword at the one talking… and pulled the trigger. The percussion revolver built into the hilt of the short sword was zero’d using a notch Benjamin cut into the crossguard, and the tip of the curved blade as a crude set of open sights. The barrel of the revolver lay along one side of the blade, and was rifled. The speaking soldier orc’s took the smaller pistol round through the forehead, exploding the back of his skull in a cone of dark green and grey mist. The exit wound showered his companion in bits of bone and brains. Benjamin’s thumb found the hammer, and four satisfying clicks echo’d in the stunned silence, “HEAR ME!” He growled, “I, am touched by the Gods. I posses the power to end any life I choose using the power of Hell itself!” ‘if I have to show them a gun, might as well throw them off the trail’ “The violence of the raging volcano obeys my very fingertips.” His revolvesword bucked a second time as another soldier orc made a move to rush him. The smaller pistol round still punched through the orcs armor and out the back, but only left him screaming on the ground. Benjamin re-cocked, and leveled his weapon at the orc holding the chains to Val and Vi. “Now, release them.” This last remaining Orc did as asked, before gathering up his screaming companion as the girls rushed to Benjamin, he pulled them close, whispering, “I’m sorry we wont be able to pick up your dresses.”

The three of them packed up that night. Qort had understood, knowing all too well what the Principality would do to acquire a Touched of Benjamins ability. “Stay safe my friend. I pray our paths cross again.” Jukha snuck them out of the village that night, using his wagon to get them to his home. They stayed a week, laying low while they planned their next move. The girls spent their time learning recipes from Jukha’s wife, and ben took the time to unwind a bit. Jukha and He went on a hunt, and Benjamin was given a run down on the flora and fauna of the Feral wood. The two of them brought back a pair of Stags, and the three women cooked them a feast.

“Dinner’s ready!!” called Viola, setting the last of the sides on the table as the dutch oven roasted meat was brought off of the stove top. It was a simple yet elegant meal. Stag, potatoes, some kind of Kale style vegetable that Benjamin had never seen before. Soon enough, everyone at the table was leaning back, as full as they could make themselves. “So, pinkskin,” Jukha asked, “Where do you plan on going. I wouldn’t mind you staying with me. I could use another hunter, but I suspect that they would notice the extra product I brought to the village.”

Benjamin Hummed, “The Maridian Combine. Qort told me that they banned slavery over a century ago, the girls have learned so much already. It would be easy to find jobs for them.” Vi and Val drooped slightly but hid it well. Jukha noticed it but said nothing. “A good choice, their boarders are well guarded, you would need to free them before you cross, or end up in a dungeon yourself.”

“Good point, I can write up a simple writ of freedom. Something I can sign and give to them.” Benjamin nodded, “I can get started on that to…” he paused as a hand fell on his. He looked to see Viola staring at him, fighting back tears, “Hey, what’s wrong. You will be free…” Jukha nodded slowly and stood. “love,” he said to Vilora, “I need some help with the livestock” The Farie met his eyes in unspoken understanding, fluttering out the front door with Jukha.

“Vi, what’s wrong.” Benjamin asked gently.

“No… go… Val… stay…” Both of them turned to Valtrya in shock. She was trembling, “I wont..leave.”

“You speak?” Benjamin looked in shock, but Viola spoke next, “Benjamin, we don’t want to leave. We want to stay, with you. I…” She paused. Ben sighed, “I want you to stay too.” He said, finally admitting it to himself, “But I can’t own you. It’s killing me that you are my property.” He reached up and wiped a tear from Vi’s eyes, “You are so much more than property. I feel evil, every day that I wake up knowing that I could do anything I wanted to you, or worse, die and have someone else hurt you for the fun of it.” Benjamin bowed his head. Viola reached out, lifting his chin to look into his eyes, “Then come with us.” She whispered as Val stood up and stepped around the table, “yes.. You, come.” She wrapped herself around Ben from the side leaning in until she was resting her head against his shoulder, “I’m… staying.. with you.” she said softly. Viola nodded, “Benjamin, how old do you think we are.”

Ben looked at her in confusion, “I have no idea, I’ve always assumed you were teenagers. 13-14 years old for Val, maybe 16 for you, but that was when you were skin and bones.” He admitted.

Viola’s eyes widened in understanding. “You did not want to bed us because you thought us children.” Benjamin nodded slowly, answering. “And forcing sex on a child is the worst kind of crime on my world”. Viola and Valtrya looked at each other, before Vi spoke. “Ben, my sister will turn one hundred and three in a fortnight. I just had my one hundred and fifteenth birthday last week.” She leaned in, pressing her lips to Bens as she kissed him passionately for a moment. “We are no children,” Viola paused as Valtrya leaned in, kissing Ben lightly on the neck, “You are not forcing us to do anything, but leave.” Viola whispered as she began to close in to a surprised Benjamin for another kiss.

The door to the cabin flew open violently, and the girls pulled back to a more modest distance. Jukha walked in, carrying a panting Vilora. “What happened.” Ben asked hurriedly, hoping he wasn’t blushing as hard as the heat on his cheeks suggested. Vilora waved a hand as Jukha set her down in her chair, “The Vin… My sisters… they reached out… They wish to meet…” The Farie gathered herself, “They also sent a warning. We must leave, tonight… hunters.”
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If you made it this far, I very much appreciate it. I hope you enjoyed the episode! If you believe I have earned it, I have a Patreon that is two episodes ahead of the free releases for this series. I hope you feel taking a look is worth it. Either way, come hang out in the comments. Everyone's welcome! I've discovered Im a bit of a "warts and all" poster, so even critical comments are welcome. Hell, You might even teach me something (it happens more than I'd like to admit).
I have heard people off and on reference Royal road, So I am going to give it another shot. I'll be adding the Royal Road link from now on. If you like reading over there, It is on the same schedule as here. I would greatly appreciate a like/review/comment if you feel so inclined. Thank you again for stopping by.
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Hi everyone. I’m here to share some hope.
I (23M) had anal warts for the past 8-6 months. It was a very difficult situation, they were itchy, I was bleeding almost everyday and couldn’t even sleep well. They were big, abundant.
What did I do to clear them out?

1. Go to the derm: I got cryo every two weeks for 6-8 months.
2. Be as healthy as possible: your immune system has to be on point. I was eating healthy, hitting the gym 4-6 times a week, sauna, meditation, taking vitamins and AHCC (I wasn’t very consistent with this supplement but I read it helps)
3. Got the vaccine. I got one shot like two months ago, second shot like a month ago, and will have a third one in 5 months.
4. DO NOT SHAVE, just trim.
5. I sweat a lot, so I take a shower after I go to the bathroom in the morning, after I workout at 11am, and before bed. This is very important.
6. I used Imiquimod every M-W-F the week after cryo. I had so many that I used two packages of cream.
7. Stop vaping, drinking, or smoking. I didn’t do any of that but i am 100% sure it will help you

I’m so happy to share my story. Don’t lose hope. Try to get cryo or any kind of help from a dermatologist or a doctor.
The last month my insurance expired so I paid out of pocket. $20 per session of cryo = $40 per month. Don’t let this f*cking virus take control of your live or your emotions.
And also want to clarify: I never had anal sex or any kind of touching back there. So I don’t know how they got there in the first place.
Let me know if you have any questions, I’ll tell you what worked for me.

Everybody keeps saying that the new movie should be a Kong movie, and I do personally agree with this even though I like to see Godzilla, who seems to be a very long cameo in a movie that has his name written first. But that begs a question, hypothetically how'd you rewrite GxK to make it more like a Kong movie?
Mine is not the best, but I'll try my best.
The movie intro starts nearly the same, but remove all Godzilla scene, until the traps Kong set up collapsed, and Skar King emerged from the gap. Instead of destroying the outpost like he did in the movie, he'd try to lure Kong in the uncharted area without Monarch knowing. Then Kong ventures around, meets a Drownviper and almost gets incapacitated (doesn't make sense given that Kong killed it canonically), just before Kong gets drowned, Skar King takes the opportunity and swiftly saves Kong from the eel-like titan.
For Skar King, who is better be bigger and stronger than Kong, he should be extremely manipulative in an emotional sense, but the tyrannical sadistic side should be kept hidden until the big reveal. Kong, still too shocked and surprised to see a fellow species of his though he is a bit different, would immediately follow him around without any hesitation, who took him back to his kingdom. The red ape puts on a friendly facade and tells him that the Gojira species locked him and the apes up, thus, making Kong's already present dislike toward Godzilla grow.
When they get back to the kingdom, which doesn't contain Shimo like the movie did, Kong does express sadness after seeing how malnourished his species are, making his sympathy toward Skar King bigger. Here's a really stupid catch, prior to inviting Kong, Skar King basically becomes Kim Jong un and turns every ape into an NPC, which means actors. They'd act all scared and surround Kong, thus, fueling the big guy's remorse and empathy. The red ape would then introduce Kong to Suko, who'd later be Kong's companion and savior, and say that he could lead the apes to a better place, that's if he got the Hollow Earth energy with Kong's help. Wanting to free his people and the emotional manipulation from Skar, Kong instantly agrees without even noticing Suko's fearful expression.
Kong, Suko, Skar King and his armies set out to find the energy that could help the apes thrive. Along the way, Kong would notice Suko's anxiety around his own father but never question why. Nevertheless, the big guy would still bond over his nunchuck, and a montage of them skipping rocks on the lake and Kong teaching Suko how to properly throw a rock at someone's head (This might or might not be crucial). After reaching an unknown area, the whole scout manage to find a crystal that could help them control megafauna and even smaller titans (kinda like Shimo but wider range).
But upon acquiring the crystal, Suko suddenly snatches it from Kong's hand, and Skar King, along with his subordinates, laughs hysterically and says that Kong is a stupid moron. Skar King then reveals that he is the tyrant who caused the Titan War and starves the apes, and Kong realizes that the one who saves him was just power-hungry dictator. Confused, enraged and betrayed, Kong challenges him into a fight, and Skar King pulls out his whip, which then breaks Kong's rotten tooth. Kong does put up a good fight, but ultimately, he loses to Skar King's superior build and experience. Instead of chopping his head off with his axe, Suko says that throwing him off the cliff will do just find, and for once, Skar King agrees with his son. They take the axe and dump Kong's body over the cliff, but using his most powerful weapon ever (plot armor), he falls into a lake and survives but heavily injured.
He crawls back to Jia and Ilene, saying that he lost his home and people because of his stupidity and ignorance. Jia then tells him that she also lost her people and home and he will lose his species if he decides to do nothing. Kong gets motivated and is given a BEAST glove and instantly heads to Skar King's lair, where the tyrant is still flaunting his new piece of weapon that could help him rule the surface. When Kong arrives and once again challenges Skar King, who is surprised to see him but happy to accept the offer. With the BEAST glove, Kong clearly has the edge and sometimes grapples Skar and beats him up quite easily. Skar King spits out his tooth and tests his new toy, which attracts a bunch of Wart Dogs and Spineprowlers to attack Kong, who prevailed with minor injuries.
When Kong manages to pin Skar King down and chokes him, the tyrant swallows his pride and orders his subordinates to jump Kong all at once. The other apes hopelessly watch as Kong, despite being the strongest specimen of his species, can't fight all of the stripped apes. Even though one punch from his BEAST glove can put them to sleep, it's too much for Kong to manage, and eventually, he succumbs but still keep fighting. This desperate act seems to motivate the starved apes, but they don't have the courage to stand against them, but then, Suko, and Doug as his battle horse, roars as he throws rocks at his father's head. A small act of retaliation sparks a flame, and the apes all rush down to help Kong fight the Skar King and his armies.
Kong is then released and faces Skar King again, who is now more pissed off and swears that he'll kill every traitor when this is over. After a short fight in the arena, Kong and Skar King would then stop to catch a breath before continuing. Of course, Skar King notices the weakest Kong, Gnarled Finger, sneaking up on him, and he smiles before kicking the ape into the lava. Suko witnesses this and cries out in agony, and Kong, enraged, charges forward and goes all feral.
The final battle ends up with Kong prevailing and having Skar King at his mercy. Just as before Kong drops him into the lava like he did to Gnarled Finger, our protagonist chooses to spare him, but not without any consequences. Skar King, now utterly defeated and humiliated, and his army were now banished from his own kingdom by an outsider. He swears revenge and desire to take over the world, but Kong doesn't give a shit about his trash talking and throws the crystal into the lava, destroying it. The movie ends with Kong doing a victory roar along with his apes, and the our big guy is crowned King Kong.
The after-credit begins with a roar, and a broken crystal is dropped to the ground. Skar King, still could not let go of his revenge of both Kong and Godzilla, sadistically smiles as he grabs the crystal, and a roar of pain can be heard from a cave that seems to have two glowing blue eyes.
Yeah, not the best plot but that's all I can come up with. I'd have liked it more if Skar King was more of a threat instead of Shimo since he was hyped up so much. We heard the word 'hunger' in the reveal video, but in the film, he only ate once. No cannibalism, no eating Gojira, just... some Hollow Earth creatures. Ngl, I kinda hate it when the novel confirms that Kong could kill Skar King. Well, I hope that they release some comic about the Titan War, which could give us insight more about Skar King and his past.

Hi all. Found out in March I have HPV. 16,18,45 negative. My doctor did the colposcopy, but they still did not determine or tell me which strains I have, only that it is high risk and not one of the 3 listed above. I know they say low risk strains cause warts, but how can I know if I have a chance of getting them if I don’t know what strain I have? Does it make sense to go back and try to get a test again? I feel so out of my element so any advice would help. TIA

(25F) After being diagnosed with hsv2 in February I now think I have genital warts after seeing a few wart looking things around my vagina and possibly inside.. I have an appointment in two weeks to have them looked at but I’m devastated. I had just gotten to the point where I was okay with having hsv2 that I wasn’t going to let it define me. That guys would not care. However to have 2 STDs is to much for me. How am I suppose to tell future partners I have TWO. I feel like no one will want to deal with the baggage I’m bringing into a relationship.
I just started talking to a guy I really like to (haven’t had sex) and now I feel like there’s no chance we can continue things with me having a genital wart outbreak…. I feel like there’s no way he would accept me for that. Any advice you can offer will be appreciated.

I keep seeing people replying to me who think I'm an introverted feeler. It's funny because they base this on behaviours that show when I care deeply about others, and when I tend to disagree or show any sort of outward hostility. Often I do this because I care about others, but it's like they only see the behaviour and not the motive.
I even see people saying this about other INFJs. I think it needs to stop, because the people who keep doing this don't seem to grasp that behaviour isn't cognitive function. Cognitive function dictates behaviour, not the other way around. And even then, every INFJ is unique, and we don't all act the same way all the time.
I see a lot of younger INFJs also make this mistake in assuming all INFJs avoid conflict 24/7, just because it's what they personally do. Funny enough, I was that exact type of INFJ when I was younger. I avoided every bit of conflict I crossed due to trauma and past negative experiences in group settings. As I've gotten older I've learned to not give a shit, because ultimately I know what drives people; often it's petty, stupid, and short sighted social games.
As a 30 y/o INFJ, I'm here to tell you that you don't need to put up with people's bullshit social games. You can be yourself and reject people's expectations of who they want you to be. You can choose not to reinforce those expectations onto others in order to fit in. You'll be a lot happier. Just focus on how stupid people can be in groups, and you'll quickly see it in your own behaviour, you'll choose to be authentic because you hate how others have treated you. And you'll regret your own actions.
INFJs, we can be harmonious through creating change in conflict, it's often uncomfortable, but about the only way to do it is to push through and accept that we can't please everyone. Once you get there, you can truly influence groups in positive ways. Rip that mask right off and be yourself, warts and all. Use that extraverted feeling to read people and connect to them, express your emotions outwardly and be yourself. And know when it's best to self restrain and hold your tongue. Everything is balance.

(25F) After being diagnosed with hsv2 in February I now think I have genital warts after seeing a few wart looking things around my vagina. I have an appointment in two weeks to have them looked at but I’m devastated. I had just gotten to the point where I was okay with having hsv2 that I wasn’t going to let it define me. That guys would not care. However to have 2 STDs is to much for me. How am I suppose to tell future partners I have TWO. I feel like no one will want to deal with the baggage I’m bringing into a relationship. Any advice you can offer will be appreciated.

Gus the donkey.
Adventurers often obtain donkeys to carry extra gear or loot. Strong and sturdy, these beasts of burden are also remarkably efficient, able to forage almost anywhere, and needing only straw or hay and a little grass now and then when on the farm or in town. These un-sung heroes need a little love. Here's a d100 list of Donkey Details (I suppose you could use most of these for mules, too):

1. Laughing Donkey. This donkey's hee-haw sounds remarkably similar to human laughter. Makes this particular sound only when PC's do something stupid or risky.
2. Scared of open fire -- torches, campfire, etc; runs away. Can tolerate lanterns (but kinda iffy).
3. Practical Joker Donkey. Takes one step to the side when anyone tries to load anything onto it and the loader is not looking.
4. Union Donkey. If ever loaded over 3/4 normal carrying capacity, goes on strike, will only walk in circles until it gets a long rest.
5. Back-Peddling Donkey. When spooked, always tries to back up 60 feet, no matter what's back there.
6. Depressed. Need to talk to it and pet it for 10 minutes after each long rest (and on cloudy days) to get it moving.
7. Battle Donkey. This one loves battle and always charges straight toward any battle noises it hears. No holding it back. Ooh-rah!
8. Passenger Donkey. Happy to carry riders (bareback, without a saddle), but doesn't want anything tied / cinched around it (will try to scrape items off against a tree, wall, the ground, etc.).
9. Allergies. Donkey has allergies in spring and fall. Sneezing fit 2-in-6 chance each hour. Drops stuff.
10. Lie-Detector Donkey. This donkey can sense when a humanoid is lying. Likely via some sort of pheromone cue (?). Farts if a lie is told within 10 feet of it.
11. Marathon Donkey. This donkey has incredible endurance and can travel twice as far between long rests.
12. Will carry sacks, corpses, or other floppy things, but not wooden boxes or other things with sharp edges.
13. Scared of crowds. Simply WILL NOT enter a village / town / city.
14. Has tapeworms, must feed twice the normal rations until diagnosed and healed. Poop can give tapeworms to any humanoid. Heads up.
15. Streetwise Donkey. Grew up in a city, pulling a delivery cart. Knows all the streets of the city, how to get anywhere. You tell it where you want to go, it will slowly, at a plodding pace, lead you there. It can't talk or understand any commands other than place names in that one city.
16. Vagabond Donkey. This donkey will occasionally wander away from the group and stay gone a few days, but then it always returns. Where does it go? Why? No one knows.
17. Mother-bucker. Will attempt to buck any female humanoid who attempts to ride.
18. Nauseated, 2-in-6 chance of throwing up in a big way every 10 minutes for a day
19. Scared of its own shadow. On sunny days, freaks out every now and then.
20. Large Donkey. This donkey is a freak of nature and is twice the normal size. It can carry four times the normal load and requires four times the normal feed/rations. It won't fit in most stable stalls, through most doorways, etc. Commoner strangers are usually freaked out by it; they are often intimidated by it (2-in-6 chance), or try to kill it (1-in-6 chance) because they think it is a bad omen, enchanted, cursed, undead, etc.
21. Stealthy Donkey. This donkey walks in a way that is completely silent, even on cobblestones, and shifts its weight as needed to eliminate the sounds of any clanking gear it carries. Instinctively hides itself behind/inside/undearound any available cover, at all. You turn around, there it suddenly is, looking at you in the eye. Can freak a dude out.
22. Loves butterflies. Chases every one it sees.
23. Counting Donkey. Point at a group of objects and say "Count." Donkey will tap its front right hoof a number of times equal to the number of objects in the group. Counts about one item per second. Can't spell worth a damn, though.
24. Aqua-donkey. This donkey loves playing in streams/rivers/ponds/rivers. Runs to them. Likes to splash everyone else. Thinks it's funny.
25. Catches a parasite disease and will die in 3 days unless healed
26. Chip-On-Shoulder Donkey. If there are other donkeys / horses around, hates them, always picking a fight.
27. Blessed Donkey. This donkey enters the scene carrying a religious messiah, or so they say.
28. Talking Donkey. Amazing! But, a bit finicky, only talks 1-in-4 times you ask it to, and at other random times as DM deems appropriate. Also, only knows a few words/phrases: yep, nope, hungry, tired, idiot, run away.
29. Hates the heat. Half movement and half carrying capacity on hot days > 80F. Needs double water rations.
30. Ate some weird mushrooms along the way. Temporarily blind for 1d4 days
31. Hates elves, they're too self-absorbed and snooty, always making you walk through trackless forests, getting you stuck in the underbrush.
32. Prudent Donkey. Has 1-in-6 chance of perceiving a trap within 30 feet. Will look at the trigger mechanism, hee-haw loudly, and not take a step toward it. No matter what.
33. Mystical Donkey. Has some kind of weird ancestral donkey mind-meld with a caster in the group, constantly complaining (mentally) that "this s**t is too heavy, dude," "can't you give a donkey a break?," "how about carrying some of this s**t yourself, tough guy," etc. You can't concentrate.
34. Lucky Donkey. When within 10 feet of this donkey, you can re-roll one roll per day.
35. Somehow, loves smelly green ogres who sing. Tries to run off with any such ogres encountered.
36. Hates humans, they make you work too hard, usually in larger towns or cities where the cobblestones hurt your feet.
37. Needs a bath, smells very bad. Indescribable, really. No surprising any foe while this donkey is around until it gets a bath.
38. Shy Donkey. Always tries to move behind you when you encounter anyone new.
39. Keen smell. Can smell most enemies within 100 feet and will hee-haw loudly to warn you. False alarm 1-in-4.
40. Sprint Donkey. This donkey can run at twice the normal movement rate, but only for one minute between long rests.
41. Drunk Donkey. Will only work when slightly inebriated. Must feed it a wee flask of ale, wine or whisky to get any work out of it.
42. Has one very short leg. Walks unevenly. Kinda funny, but only 1/2 normal movement rate.
43. Beautiful Donkey. This donkey is a very fine specimen of a donkey. Highly desired by donkey ranchers to breed other donkeys. Sells for double the normal price. Bit of a prima donna. Must be fed one apple or pear per day, or refuses to work. Resents you.
44. Hates the cold. Half movement and half carrying capacity on hot days < 50F. Needs double saddle blankets.
45. Sneaky. When you're not looking, has 1-in-2 chance each day of pick-pocketing something off the back of a random PC. Might drop it, might eat it, might fling it to the side of the road, might just hold it in it's mouth. Hard to say with donkeys.
46. Scared of snakes. Snake within 30' causes total donkey freak out.
47. Always tries to eat/gnaw whatever it is carrying (especially food) whenever you're not looking, ruins stuff.
48. Freaked out by undead. If it sees undead, or smells them (can smell 60' away), RUNS in the opposite direction.
49. Narcoleptic Donkey. Falls asleep, often.
50. Critic Donkey. When others aren't looking, looks at you and rolls its eyes. You swear.
51. Foraging Donkey. Grew up in the wild. If there is any vegetation around, at all, it can find it, find enough edible material for a meal, and feed itself, no rations required.
52. Shoe-Throwing Donkey. One-in-four chance of losing a horse shoe each day, won't walk until found or replaced.
53. Small Donkey. Can only carry half normal carrying capacity. But has a scrappy attitude and is NOT SCARED OF ANYTHING (immune to fear and intimidation).
54. Repressed anger. Tries to bite (for real) anyone within 5' who is not its owner (considers only one person its owner).
55. Back-Row Donkey. If there are multiple four-legged animals in the group, this one must be the last, in the back, or it won't go/work at all.
56. Vertigo Donkey. Always dizzy, walks in circles unless carefully guided constantly by hand.
57. Hates carts, wagons, etc. Will not pull a cart or other wheeled vehicle.
58. Wallowing Donkey. Enjoys a good roll in a mudhole/puddle. Every mudhole/puddle.
59. Deaf. You bought/raised a deaf donkey. Should have checked. Anyway, can't hear any commands. Won't respond to visual commands. Must touch the donkey to give it a command.
60. Musical Donkey. Gets indigestion often, becomes VERY flatulent.
61. Flying Donkey. This donkey has been magically enchanted to fly, only once in its life, for one minute. The wranglemaster must speak the command word: "Esel-burro"
62. Addle-Headed Donkey. Once per day, has a 1-in-4 chance of running in a random direction for 1 minute.
63. Hates the rain. Won't work in the rain. *OR* Hates the wind. Won't work in the wind.
64. Say-My-Name Donkey. You must call it by name to get it to do anything. It answers with a loud bray each time.
65. Hates dwarves, always making you work underground in the mines, and their beards are (somehow) scary.
66. Often gets a leg cramp, limping for 10 minutes, 1/4 movement rate.
67. Smoking habit. Will work only if you let it smoke lit cigarette or pipe while on duty.
68. Smart and independent. Anticipates and does exactly what you want 5-in-6 of the time, but disagrees and argues 1-in-6 of the time.
69. Lover Donkey. Wants to make baby donkeys, runs after opposite gender donkey (or horse) every time it gets the chance.
70. Has a drinking problem. Will always rush toward any water source to take a drink.
71. Is a hot head, always immediately charges and attacks any foe encountered. No holding him back.
72. Pregnant Donkey. This donkey is about to have a baby. 2-in-6 chance each day until baby is born.
73. Loves flowers. To eat. Will only do any work if given one bouquet to eat per day.
74. Pious. Has 1-in-6 chance each hour of stopping for 10 minutes, kneeling on front two legs, and praying to the donkey god "No Cargo Bob"
75. Death Wish Donkey. Is reckless, doesn't look where it's going, always running into things, chance of falling off cliffs, etc.
76. Dead pan smile. At the most dangerous / awkward moments, turns to a party member and gives the most ridiculous, hilarious donkey smile you have every seen. PC must make DC 10 Const saving throw or bust out laughing for 30 seconds.
77. Nervous Tick Donkey. This donkey kicks its left leg backwards randomly, every now and then. If anything/anyone is standing behind this donkey, there is a 1-in-6 chance that it kicks.
78. Cargo Donkey. Happy to carry items/supplies tied or cinched around it, but won't carry humanoid riders (bucks them off).
79. Homesick, always tries to run away and go back home (or to the place where you bought / found / raised him) every chance he gets
80. Perceptive Donkey. Has 1-in-6 chance of perceiving a secret door within 30 feet. Will walk up to it and put its nose on it.
81. Scared of water, won't cross a creek/rivepond/lake, etc. Definitely not getting on a boat.
82. Front-Row Donkey. If there are multiple four-legged animals in the group, this one must be the leader, in front, or it won't go/work at all.
83. Pacifist Donkey. Refuses to carry any weapons or ammo.
84. Glowing Donkey. This donkey glows faintly in the dark. Very dim light. No one knows why.
85. War Veteran Donkey. Missing one leg at the knee (maybe has peg leg). Opposite ear slashed off. Wears an eyepatch. Lots of scars. Can only carry half normal weight, but its kick does +2 damage.
86. Vagabond Donkey. This donkey will occasionally wander away from the group and stay gone a few days, but then it always returns. Where does it go? Why? No one knows.
87. Alert Donkey. This donkey has a 1-in-6 chance, on its own, independent of PC checks, of noticing an impending ambush. It will hee-haw loudly if an ambush is about to occur.
88. Ate some bad food / weeds, now has diarrhea, big diarrhea, 1-in-4 chance every hour for a day.
89. Expressive Donkey. Often has ideas and wants to share, "hee-haws" very loudly for 30 seconds. Sometimes indicates something important, sometimes not.
90. Large Donkey. This donkey is a freak of nature and is twice the normal size. It can carry four times the normal load and requires four times the normal feed/rations. It won't fit in most stable stalls, through most doorways, etc. Commoner strangers are usually freaked out by it; they are often intimidated by it (2-in-6 chance), or try to kill it (1-in-6 chance) because they think it is a bad omen, enchanted, cursed, undead, etc.
91. Hates halflings, their barn doors are too low and their generally cheery attitude is annoying.
92. Super-donkey. Can carry three times normal carrying capacity, but for only one-third the normal time between long rests.
93. Easily distracted by various things along the road ("Squirrel!"), constantly stopping to sniff / check out something.
94. Really thirsty today, requires twice the normal water ration for one day. Pees a lot. (I mean a lot.)
95. Wrong-way Donkey. Will only walk backwards. Half movement rate.
96. Ugly Donkey. This donkey is bow-legged, has a saggy back, missing teeth, ugly hair, warts, boils, is missing large patches of hair due to mange, somehow is always dirty, has flies, ticks, lice, etc. Nose usually runny. Eyes too. BUT, this donkey can Misty Step.
97. Shell-shocked Donkey. Scared of battle noises. Runs away from battle noises. Like, a quarter-mile away.
98. Hates strangers. When within 15 feet of an unknown/new humanoid, hee-haws loudly for 5 minutes. So embarrassing.
99. Picky eater, only eats store-bought straw/hay/whatever. Won't forage along the road/trail.
100. Loyal Donkey. Will not leave its humanoid wranglemaster unprotected. Will defend wranglemaster to the end. Will take an arrow or battle ax blow to defend wranglemaster. There to the end, no matter what.

https://professorbumblefingers.blogspot.com/
[edit: corrected a redundancy]

Hi everyone. I’ve posted here before, and I want to thank you all for your patience and understanding. You've been kind and have taught me a lot, and I value it more than you know.
This is a longer post. I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read it. I do have questions at the end, if anyone would be generous enough to help a little.
I first learned one year ago that my A1C was “a bit high” after going from bodybuilding, to being in bed with a broken knee, and then one of the most stressful years I’ve ever had with a familial blowup. Angry, in full denial, and determined, I brought my A1C down in three months as fast and as far as physically possible from April to July 2023. Then I had minor foot surgery in November, and it started to creep up again. I was convinced it was major stress, no physical activity, terrible sleep, etc…
I DO have a predisposition to Diabetes. I’m now a 50 year old man weighing around 180lbs. Healthy or not, it was bound to catch up with me regardless of my years at the gym and eating a balanced diet, and all it took was one horrific year to tip the scales against me. I went from all perfect numbers and great health, to an A1C that was a bit high (never over 8), but not an “emergency.” This was a driving force that led me to believe that I could reverse it completely and go back to normal. I obsessively tested with finger pricks every morning and evening for months, and I had red each morning - dawn phenomenon, and green after eating. I had to stop testing so much, I was going crazy, unable to do anything more.
I don’t want to lose weight. I am not going to starve myself and skip meals, as I had an ED when I was younger. I also have a hiatal hernia/GERD and can't make up for a whole day's calories all at once. I'm a smaller-meals-throughout-the-day person which manages that beautifully. I’ve read about some people losing weight to lower A1C, amd it starts leveling off …until it’s NOT level again and then having to lose more weight, etc. It’s a concern, and I just can’t do that. I’ve also talked to people who are heavier than I am who have kept things in check very successfully. It’s not my weight that got me here, it’s not years of an imbalanced lifestyle that caught up with me, so I’m not going to blame myself or let anyone else blame me, either. (Which has made me very angry, when it has happened.) This just finally caught up with me. I don't know how many people are in the same boat as I am. The “you messed up/did this to yourself” stigma is absolutely brutal for ANYONE to receive, and doesn’t help me in the least. :(
I’m not telling anybody irl about any of this, except my spouse. I am not going to wear a monitor unless it becomes an emergency, I don't want anyone seeing it, or knowing my medical business. As someone with OCD and PTSD, I also can’t handle the constant obsession about readings after everything I do and eat all the time. I do not feel highs and lows, I don’t have crashes. I’ve had a year of wrapping my head around this, and someone once said something like “someone without Diabetes can eat all ice cream they want, but once you have Diabetes, your body will always react.” And that made me realize there’s no getting off this train even if I get back to, and stay in, remission. That was HARD to take.
So that hopefully rounds up where I’m at, and might answer some questions ahead of my own questions:
Question #1 - Can anything really be done about the dawn phenomenon? I’ve read so many ideas that “may help” but solutions are still out of reach.
Question #2 - How do you know if/when Foot Neuropathy may NOT due to T2? Is there a difference in feeling when it'snot due to T2? In my life I have had various foot problems from sprained ankles, orthotics for a few years until my feet changed, a fractured ankle, and plantar fasciitis, etc. The foot surgery was a plantar’s wart. - After a trip to NYC in May 2022 (a full year before while my numbers were still perfect) I came home with the bottoms of my feet tingling and sore. I wore old running shoes that I thought were good enough, but it was an insane amount of walking, all on cement. I was told it should go away on its own, but now I don't just want it blamed on my blood glucose. What happened then, that didn’t go away? I don't know. - My A1C initially rose in April 2023 after months of knee recovery. I honestly can say the foot problem started before any of this, and I’m worried about a different problem being ignored. - They’re not usually tingling/hot in the mornings, worse after a long day, sometimes stretching my calves/hips helps. The tingling (but not always hot) is not always in the same spot. If I’m on a recliner and it’s pressing on my calves, it’s from the heel and straight up the middle. Lying sideways, it tingles along the side of the foot pressing on the bed/couch. - It can be worse right after a workout (but not today) and better the next day. I don’t know if this is typical of a T2 neuropathy, or if something else is happening that started a full year before, when my numbers were all fine?? I even wonder if it's something stupid like I'm tying my shoes too tight, or trapped nerves, or not stretching enough for better circulation.
Thank you for reading, and for your time. I appreciate any help at this point.
** I am not on any meds, doing the back-to-my-lifestyle managing until my doc says otherwise.

I just left a message on my long-separated wife’s phone; I simply asked her, how many times over the past nearly 40 years, have you cheated on me. I hung up and now I’m sitting here waiting for her return call, claiming I’m crazy, and that she’s has never cheated on me.
I was here reading cheating wife stories on Redditt when an interesting story was written and caught my attention, it took my mind to an experience we had in our lives together. The story was based on a husband finding out his wife was diagnosed with chlamydia. The story stated that it was a sexually transmitted disease. The man divorced his wife by that evidence alone.
Chlamydia, according to all my quick research after the reading of this story, confirmed my worst fears. The only methods of being infected by this disease was by oral, anal, vaginal sex or it could have been dormant for a couple years. Well, she contracted it and told me 3 months after being married. The dormant part was still not a reason as we had been living together for 4 years prior to our wedding. I was the fool to believe all these years that she contracted it using the jacuzzi at the hotel she stayed at 2 months after our wedding. This was a training seminar for a new program for her travel agency. The trip took her away from home for a week. The dumbass unintellectual man I was, took her word as truth. No matter the outcome there will be no divorce, just understanding that I now know the truth is enough for me. We have been separated for the past 7 years, but due to her health issues I still maintain a good relationship, I do her shopping, her taxi services, and make sure she sets up all her Dr. appointments. None of this will change, I just want the truth, were there more than just the one. As I’m sitting here my mind is racing through other times that were suspicious. I’m sure all these thoughts were common amongst other betrayed spouses, both men and women alike. This alone was counterproductive, and useless in my case. But there’s no way to keep my thoughts from seeking answers and clarity.
If it hadn’t been a 7-year separation, then it most likely would have ended in divorce. But our lives now are content, I’m satisfied just being me. We have been together since 1985 and married in 1989, bought two homes, traveled intensely, but never had children. We grew apart as she enjoyed the bottle in excess, I felt disrespect from her by not even trying to understand my views. I moved out to keep from hurting her or myself due to the frustrations and pure lack of passion towards her any longer. We’re both in our 60’s and have no plans to remarry anyone from either side. She has been a part of my family due to her 38 plus years of holiday events, we have bonds well beyond our marriage. She is now alone and so I have become her only true friend, and I take her health more seriously than she does most times. That’s where our current relationship stands. I will wait for her call for the next 5 hours, or longer, until she gets out of bed at 6 to 7 pm. This was another very large part of our separation, she was a night owl, me a morning person. I would be getting up and she would be going to bed at the same time, what a life we had together.
Update
Here it is 9:54pm, I’m still waiting for a call, or any other type of response from her. But the phone hasn’t changed from its sleep mode. This whole time between the realization of her infidelity and the current time sitting in anticipation of her response from my message. All my mind did was think of any other possible reasons that she could explain. As the time clicks on the digital clock blips by the minute, the phone remains silent. The mindset that I am experiencing is somewhat unexplainable. I’m upset that the truth is finally coming out. But then again, I really don’t even care. Why then do I feel like I need more information, but in truth all I really do need to know is that it’s true. I’m not mad or even revengeful, hell I’m old and just satisfied just to be me. The worst part of waiting for this call is the constant looking at the clock as the minutes tick away. Minute after minute I’ve been dreading the talk or the lies or even the whys. I’ve started to wonder when she’ll actually call, if she even calls at all. If there isn’t a call tonight, I will just leave her another message tomorrow, no need to rush this now, damn it’s already been 35 years. But for now, we wait…
Update
10:36pm when she finally called, I asked her before she said anything. Well, as I waited for her response silently, she finally replied I’ve never cheated on you ever. I responded with “are you sitting on the couch, like she normally does, she replied with yes. I said look to the right and look at our wedding picture. I then said you cheated on me within two months of that picture. I then explained how her medical issues were the result of three and only three ways of contracting them, oral, anal or vaginal. I then told her I had done my research, and if she can find another way this could be contracted then go ahead prove me wrong. I continued with if she gave it to me, which I had surgery for, who did she get it from questionably. She started to protest, as I hung up the phone. A voice mail arrived 3 minutes after the call. I’m holding off listening to it for now. Depending on where I’m at after all my drinks sink into my system…
It’s me again, sorry for my echoes but, we’ve lived apart for 7 years. Life is okay for us, and this won’t change how I care for her. Life will go on the same, but her gaining my trust back, can I or had I or do I still trust her. I don’t know, as many people have been here, I have felt feelings here that are just as unpredictable as the discovery of the act of infidelity itself. The one thing I thought about after leaving her on that call, her saying repeatedly that it happened a long time ago, even though I had already told her she cheated two months after our wedding. Why was she emphasizing a long time ago, was the true question, as I thought with a few drinks induced into my system. I have set myself some strict drinking rules and tonight I must have broken them all.
Update
It’s now 11:44pm, I have still only received the one and only voicemail from her, I have yet to listen to it so far. My buzz has taken over and I’m a happy soul now. My dog is now cuddling at my feet, I’m sure more for a scratch or a treat than sympathy towards me. Who cares, she’ll get a pig’s ear tonight just for her unconditional love. Normally she only gets one a month but tonight’s different. To be honest I’m struggling to listen to her message but, I know there will be more but, I want the whole story, not just one piece at a time delt to me. Sorry for the oddness of this issue, but I’m living it in real time and I’m just trying to express my feelings the best I can. I don’t care if it happened, I really don’t care if it even happened again. It really doesn’t matter to me, I just want to know the truth, period. I think I deserve at least that after 35 years of marriage. Okay the beers and shots have now taken over my fingers and I’ll stop for the night as I can barely see the screen clearly. I will not listen to her voice mail until I can read between the lines, so with that I bid you all a good night.
Update
I went to sleep at around 2:30 am and fell asleep quickly due to my drinking. 6:30 is when the alcohol wore off enough for reality to regain strength in my head. I laid in bed without any desire to move forward with my day. I finally rose from the bed and moved onto the living room couch just to continue my pondering. At 10 am I finally listened to her message, to my surprise it was only 16 seconds long.
“I’ve always been true to you since the day I met you, always, always”.
I returned a call to her answering machine after listening to her voice mail.
Please explain to me and the medical world, how you contracted a disease that can only be transmitted by sex. The doctors would love to know, all I’m looking for is the truth.
I then hung up the call. It will be another 7 to 8 hours before she even sees the message, so I’ll have to wait for her response. Knowing her she’ll never admit to it, which is just a shame. I was shocked to not get any further calls from her after her voice mail. But to her I guess silence is golden. It still did not address the issue; all she needs to do is find any article that states other avenues for the conception of a STD. Time will tell, but most likely she will remain indifferent and never say what needs to be said.
I understand I write a lot on this site about cheaters, but it’s all in my imagination. This on the other hand is real. I have receipts from her surgery that cost us 5 grand to have the vaginal warts removed. I also had to endure the procedure to have some lasered off my manhood both internally and externally. These are facts not speculations, our lives were turned upside down during this period.
From the beginning I have said I have no ill will and nothing in our lives will change. I am more interested in the truth rather than revenge or retaliation.
If anyone out there that is reading this has any reasonable reason that she didn’t cheat, please tell me and I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt. But from my research it could only be the saddest of outcomes for me. Any advice or thoughts could bring me some support as to how my mind is raging. Life will go on either way, but for now there are more suspicions than clarities. Thank you for listening or reading, I’m really looking for help to understand the depth of my situation.

My mom and brother are talking really badly about me. What should I, 17F, do? I don't know if this is the best place to post this, but I needed a place to get this off my chest, and this is the only subreddit that I'm active on. I've been having an extremely hard time with my family for a while now. About three weeks ago, I was caught sneaking out. My mom had already suspected me of sneaking out before. I snuck out to meet a friend, but I lied and told her that I went to the store. I know that lying is obviously bad, and I'm not trying to victimize myself because I know what I did was wrong. However,
I felt that I had to lie because I have an extremely strict, mean, and narcissistic mother and brother. I am homeschooled and not allowed to go outside at all, not even to walk outside the house. The only time I go outside is when my mom takes my younger brother to the park or to the car wash, and I either sit in the car or help her vacuum it out. Sometimes I go to the grocery store with her, but only if I ask to go. I have grown up my entire life around her and my brother. I also don't have any friends that they know about because I'm not allowed to have any social media right now. They think I'm sneaking guys into the house. I have an alarm on my window that makes a loud noise if someone opens it, but they still don't trust me. My mom sleeps in the living room on the couch, so she has a camera in her room and the living room. Her room faces the hallway, so whenever someone goes to the bathroom or walks around the hallway, it will pick up motion. Since I snuck out, they have been taking turns checking on me like I'm a prisoner. My older brother has been lying about me, saying that the alarm on my window is off or that he heard noises coming from the bathroom whenever I'm in there. My mom has been telling my younger brother to stay away from me because she thinks I have warts due to my acne. I have little bumps on my forehead that I have had since I was eleven. They wait until they think I'm asleep or in the shower to talk badly about me. Yesterday, I came back home from grocery shopping with my mom and younger brother.
I went to my room to change and noticed that my laptop had been placed in a different place, which means my older brother had gone through it. I was upset but couldn't say anything because my mom is on my brother's side. So today, while he was in the shower and my mom was taking a nap, my younger brother, who shares a room with my older brother, called me into his room to help him with his YouTube account. My older brother's phone was charging, so I decided to see what he was telling my mom. I went through his messages and saw lots of nasty things they were both saying about me. They were talking about how they didn't trust me, how I was looking at guys whenever we went to the park, and how the reason I didn't want to play with my younger brother at the park was because I wanted to make sure they weren't talking about me. My mom was calling me a slut and said that I snuck out to look for guys to have oral sex with.
She also said that I ended up giving a guy oral sex, which is why I'm always brushing my teeth in the morning. Two weeks ago, my mom took me to the OBGYN to make sure that I was not having sex and didn't have any diseases or wasn't pregnant. While at the OBGYN, my mom asked me if I was having sex, and I told her no. She said that if I was having sex, I needed to tell her so she could get me on birth control. I told her no because I'm not having sex. The doctor told her that they don't do check-ups on people under 21, and if someone says they're a virgin, they can't do a check-up on them. The doctor did ask me when my mom wasn't in the room why I was there, and I told them it was because when my mom was my age, she got pregnant and had my older sister. Because of that, she wants to make sure I'm not pregnant or doing anything. A few minutes after that, the doctor called my mom in and asked me if it was okay if she could tell my mom what I said to her. Obviously, I said yes because I didn't want my mom to think that I'm doing anything bad. The doctor told her what I said about her getting pregnant at a young age, and my mom got really upset and emotional.

Hi all, I am not sure if this is the correct place to write this but I don't have any where that I could share my concerns or worries to.. So I am sorry if this is the wrong place.
Last month, when I was cleaning my butthole after no. 2, I noticed there are like these brown stuff around my anus. I thought they're haemorrhoids in the first place and I didn't give them much attention.
2 weeks later, these brown stuff is still there and I got worried. I went to the government hospital for a diagnosis, but the GP just say that these brown stuff are just scars and what I have are internal haemorrhoids. He gave me some medicine for it and scheduled me for an appointment to check the inside 1 month (end of May) later.
2 weeks have past since and I went and check my butthole again and noticed that these brown spots are still there and upon taking a picture with my phone and zoom in, they look like GWs. I am very afraid because I for one is not sexually active at all. I do not do hook ups or go on Grindr. The first and last intercourse (May 2023) I had was with my ex-partner who claimed that he's a virgin too, and went AWOL on January 2024. I kind of felt betrayed not because of the fact that he lied about him being a virgin and all, but he could be a carrier, meaning he had hook ups around before.
I am very scared and afraid because it is just not 1 or 2 small warts, but it's as big as a coin on both side of my butthole. People say treatment is base on the number and size of warts but it feels like it's a cluster there or it's a disease there. I feel like I am a walking virus and disease. I feel like I shouldn't touch other people because I might infect them. I am so paranoid to the point I am sanitizing the floor, toilets. Using anti bacterial soap, wearing one time rubber gloves to clean my butthole, and proceed to sanitize the floor, showerhead, everything. Even the freaking door handle. Then I proceed to clean my hands with anti bacterial soap, anti bacterial liquid soap and alcohol sanitizer. I feel like I can't ever date anyone anymore and I feel like I will destroy other people's lives if I were to date someone and get together with that someone. It feels like I shouldn't exist at all.
Now as I walk, I can feel it around my butt. There's something sticking at my butt. It feels so disgusting. Even knowing it's existence on me makes me uncomfortable.
I have made an appointment with a dermatologist specialist this coming Friday (8th May) to have it diagnosed and go for whatever treatment the doctor tell me to. I am afraid that I might be at dead ends. I can't sleep well at night. I keep thinking about my death and the things I haven't do, or tried. Or what will I left behind. I can't tell the doctors that I had intercourse because I came from a very traditional and religious family and it will not be safe.. I don't know what to tell the doctor by then.. I am thinking of just pretending to be oblivious.
I heard cryotherapy doesn't hurt as much as electrocautery? Given how big or clustered mine are, will it be electrocautery? I heard that hurts a lot and post recovery is hell, and healing will get infected also. What about internal warts? I don't know if I have them. I am hoping that I could get cryo because I heard it doesn't hurt as much but does it work for internal ones?
EDIT: Grammatical errors.