Sordland & Rizia Achievement Ideas

1. Rash And Dangerous Reforms Achievement - have Sordland lose reforms in Assembly votes & have Royal Council turn down Romus' reforms unanimously.
2. Old Habits Die Hard Achievement -
   1. Have a glass of wine before Walter Tusk enters
   2. Accept Walter's cigar offer
   3. Have tea after adjusting EPA
   4. Drink wine with Business Council
   5. Accept Kisha offer from Smolak f. accept Petr's offer of a glass of something
   6. Accept Alvarez's drink offer ["Are you drinking, Mr. President dialogue choice]
   7. Accept Walker's "stronger wine"
   8. As Romus:
      1. drink wine from Romus the Red
      2. Lose the pick wrong answers in a game with your Council to trigger taking shots
      3. Agree/accept Wiktor's Kisha offer (or something in between "I'll leave the smoking to the Queen Mother" dialogue choice
      4. High Tea with Beatrice.
3. It's All All About The Money, Money Money (song) / A Money Must Be Funny In A Rich Man's World (song) Achievement -
   1. As Anton - accept bribe from Tusk, bribe Albin, bribe Frens
   2. As Romus, accept bribe from Rusty.
4. Two Heads On A Platter Achievement- be assassinated (by Oligarchs / Bluds) as Anton; as Romus, when provoking revolutionists/militants with your speech to shoot you, than abdicating.
5. "For the Oppressed!" Achievement - ban YS, assassinate Kesaro with SSP, impeach Hawker, capital punishment on Soll, denounce Su Omina and jail Rico under Rizia's custody.
6. "They Rayne-diculously Tore Us, Toras!" Achievement - be infamous as Anton and Romus [low PO, low economy, negative budget, trigger Katarina/the red's Unrest Populace and fail to contain them as Anton; trigger violent protests in provinces and fail to unify Pales back to Rizia despite Vina's marriage to Axel].
7. Two Coups and a Lie / Acquainted/Besties in Kyrute Achievement - trigger coup and exile in Kyrute with your families as Anton and Romus (fund Lucita/cops to be able to bring her with you!).
8. Unjust Proceedings Achievement - defund military, join CSP, transfer Gendermarie to Interior despite being warned and jail Soll via Grecer, reinstate capital punishment [Valken Coup] As Romus, train much men from Turn 1 to 10, increase levies, execute Lucita (to trigger Taddeus coup) and prepare to be guillotined (epilogue).
9. Bibliophile Women & Their Rubbish Books Achievement - defy / disgust over Monica reading Malenyevist/Valgish book; do not let Vina be sit-in to your Council and confiscate the book.
10. "In Loving Memories Of..." / "Any Father's Nightmare" / "The Burden That Fathers Bear" Achievement -
    1. As Anton:
       1. be strict/mean to Franc at every given turn and send Franc to military school but lose the war against Rumburg (Franc dies);
    2. As Romus:
       1. Don't let her be a part of Council
       2. Go home instead of letting her dance with Manus
       3. Lure her with approving Vina's relationship with Manus in one condition: Vina to Pales as liaison, do not jail Lucita for false flag, prepare for war and use assault strike than covert op (Vina dies)
11. Torn & Betrayed / "Where Do Broken Hearts Go?" Achievement
    1. As Anton:
       1. Support Monica on Prologue
       2. Have shady deals (Monica is your primary leaker; when you and Serge/Petr watching FC Anrica game, they be lying down on the ground in protest against you)
       3. Turn down Monica's speech
       4. Apologize and let Curtan Leste continue his speech (make Monica helpless)
       5. Outright gun WLA down. Say no, than showing support and vetoing WLA on later game. Don't fund Women's Committee
       6. Let Monica divorce you.
       7. Leak Monica's racy photos on epilogue
    2. As Romus:
       1. Be a Party Prince
       2. Have ocassional affairs
       3. Go to your other woman instead than attend Vina's birthday(?). Rushing as you go to Lena and she dies in your arms.
       4. Vina
       5. Lucita
12. Shame Isn't The Name of The Game Achievement -
    1. As Anton, lose the war against Rumburg (Franc studying somewhere else)
    2. As Romus, lose the war against Pales (Vina is not your liaison to Pales)

12 would be slightly different / opposite from #10.

Overall, what do you guys think? 🥹😅

I should probably preface this by saying I've only read the first two and a half epic collections of Doug Moench's run so I would hardly call myself an expert on the character, and maybe some of the later comics have more similarities (though from what I've been told I doubt that). The show has a lot going for it from some great performances, especially from Isaac and Calamawy, to some pretty decent fight scenes (even if some are off screen) and effects, and the writing is good if you view it as its own thing rather than an adaptation of the character. That's the thing though: if you have to view it as its own thing that means it has failed as an adaptation. And if you're going to make a show called "Moon Knight" I expect it to be an adaptation of the source material at least in some form.

The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater.
This is not a drill.
If you have any experience or interest in portraying a military man or woman in a realistic, apocalyptic depiction of the near future in North America— you're in the right place.
We will dive head first into the minds of the soldiers and survivors. Our characters will navigate a realistic setting and find themselves in extreme situations. Their metal will be brutally tested.
https://imgur.com/6ONRU7T
I seek all the dedicated rookies and people who hold the insider knowledge of the bowels of the military machinery. You can rp as a professional or a recently recruited civilian, a good or bad guy, any gender and backstory works. Whoever our characters were before the world ended won't matter. It's who they become that will be their savior or their downfall—their legacy.
There are people to save. Bonds to strengthen. Hearts to break. Redeem or betray yourself. This is it. No-holds barred. Are you in?
If you're interested, make sure to match the following guidelines. There's a catch to this roleplay but that's classified so just hit my inbox.
// Guidelines //
— respect and common sense in a relaxed atmosphere
— please be an adult, experienced, open minded and long-term co-creator not looking for a quick fix, a dice game, or to be led by the hand; it's going to be a collaborative effort (I can elaborate)
— multi paragraph, proofed replies please, but no need for flowery novellas unless that's your style
— this story will contain dark, controversial, and triggering topics so please don't show interest unless you're positive they will not affect you during hopefully very realistic and immersive scenes!
Don't be shy, come say Hi in my chat/PMs. I’ll be happy to share all the basic lore info and answer any questions you might have. I'm looking forward to meeting you so don’t worry if I take a while to respond, cheers.

My WH shows no initiative in pretty much anything. He is constantly late, has horrible indecisiveness, and never makes plans for anything. Part of that I think he learned from his mom as a cultural thing but he also grew up with American friends/family so I know he knows that it isn’t a good habit.
I feel like he has no self respect or confidence in himself. He won’t participate in hard conversations, just kind of say I’m sorry and mumble things every now and again. He doesn’t plan dates or do things without me telling/asking him. His counselor gave him a book to read like 3 months ago and he still hasn’t finished it. I feel like he doesn’t ever lead in our relationship or make decisions. He is addicted to porn and had a time limit on his social media (obviously there are other ways but he’d get triggered from there) but still cheated and still watched it. After he confessed about everything he still never thought to delete social media completely, until I mentioned it saying I didn’t feel like he was doing everything he could. He was going to marriage counseling once a month and didn’t think to increase it or schedule appointments ahead until I told him to do it once a week.
I’m tired of taking the lead, I’m tired of feeling like his mom. He does things when I ask but is it unrealistic to think he can think up things on his own? I want to be wooed, I want him to be a man and have some confidence. He always will say he doesn’t feel like he deserves to lead.

I posted the following on Kendrick on the day EB had given a noon deadline. But the mods deleted it.
Basically it seems like it’s worth posting here since this is the more conspiracy theory minded reddit. 😝
The Crying of Lot 49
This is not about the specific beef but the nature of conspiracy theories. There’s a novel by Thomas Pynchon some of you may have read called The Crying of Lot 49. I don’t know if it’s taught much these days. I used to cover it when I taught 20th century literature. But that’s me.
Anyway. The brief novel is about a woman named Oedipa (just go with it) who is contacted by a lawyer who says she has been named the executor of her ex husbands will. She has no idea why she would be chosen. And so she begins to try to execute the will and find out what role in this man’s life and death she had or has.
Every time she gets a new piece of information more questions arise. She eventually learns of a massive conspiracy involving the US postal service that extends back to the Pony Express of the 19th century. There’s a strange horn symbol that keeps coming up in her research. Everyone seems to know something, but no one knows everything.
And so she believes that the auctioning off of one of her ex-husbands items will reveal the person who has been leading her on this wild path of answers leading to questions. And it will definitely link to the horn symbol and the postal service and so on.
But the novel >! just ends with her waiting for the person who will buy lot 49 in the auction. !<
And here so many of us are trying to decide EB tweets and IG vids and court filings and printed emails — I mean the guy is posting about an auction! I can’t NOT think of Lot 49!
Don DeLillo, another author similar to Pynchon has written that “all plots lead deathward” bc death is the only thing we can use to consider a plot “finished”. Otherwise plots go on and on. They shift their focus, implicate all sorts of random people an beg us to find connections to make it all make sense (his novel LIBRA covers this well in relation to Lee Oswald).
Which is all a way of saying Americans crave conspiracies but refuse to understand that they don’t end. There are no real answers.
Ironically one of Pynchon best selling novels was Inherent Vice — which is about a vast conspiracy that IS unraveled by a California hippie burnout and an overzealous LAPD officer.
Anyway. I’d love for all this EB stuff to lead to dismantling a massive sex trafficking ring or abuse network, but I’m also not sure it will lead there or means anything.

I'm going through a bit of a rough patch now, feeling like a failure and inadequate with my career and salary. I make 75k a year at 30 years old, much less than I would like to be making. I looked up some friends/families/acquaintances on LinkedIn recently and I swear, every single one of them is crushing it in the corporate world. Manager this, Senior that, Principal, Executive, you get the idea. Not just a few people, every single random person I could think of had an amazingly high paying job! All positions making well into the 6 figure range and as high as 200k. It was such a gut punch to my self esteem.
It makes me feel so shitty about myself and how I wish things turned out differently for me, how I wish I chose a different field of study, how I wish I was smarter. I know what most people will say to this: "Don't compare yourself to others", "Comparison is the thief of joy", "You should be happy for them!" but I can't shake it and it's such a terrible feeling.
How have you felt when you learned your peers and ones your close to are succeeding when you are stagnating? How do you deal with it?

So for context I work for a company who's head quarters are in Utah and we are contracted by a company in Michigan. I'm in Louisana bc its a WFH job.
So recently my job is trying to change the bathroom policy. Usually if we needed to go to the restroom we'd let the team know in chat with a "brb rr" or "rr" and go to break aux, then go to our regular aux when we get back.
Yesterday we were told by my TL that we can't go to the bathroom anymore outside of our mandatory 15minute breaks and if we need to go to the bathroom outside of that we need accommodations set through HR. I've also heard of othe teams taking time away from your mandatory breaks bc you went to the rest room. Say you were I the bathroom for 5 minutes. Now your mandatory break is 10 minutes.
This all feels....very illegal. But I am not sure. And I'm being told it's in the handbook but I looked through that thing and it did not at all state either of these. Everyone working here has become increasingly frustrated with these changes including myself. But I'm not sure if this is illegal or not and what actions could be taken. Obviously people can and do abuse the bathroom step away but we're not children and shouldn't be treated as such.

This is a continuation to my first post here:
https://www.reddit.com/longtermTRE/comments/1crxyji/so_i_tried_this_for_the_first_time/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
A couple days ago I shared here my first TRE exercise and how it led into a dream where all felt real and I kept tremoring. Today it happened almost exactly the same but the experience was much different, and more odd. I'll try to describe it as best as I can.
As a quick side note, yesterday I did the same exercise again but it was at noon, so I didn't sleep after. This time I went on for a bit longer and during the third repetition I actually got a full body tremor which was quite intense.
So last night after I had dinner, I layed on the couch to read a bit and fell asleep. Woke up at around 4:30 AM and headed to bed. I stayed awake for a while and then decided to try the exercise again before sleeping, this time repeating the routine I did yesterday. This started at around 5 AM (I feel this is important for a reason I'll share later)
I did the routine for maybe around 10 minutes, going through 3 cycles. At the third cycle my legs tremored very violently and got a full body tremor again.
After I stopped, I put on my eye mask and intended to sleep, but instead I slowly felt my body locking up and going into full paralysis.
Now, I am no stranger to sleep paralysis and the visions one can have while in it. In fact, in a way I yearn for it so I can train to eventually feel comfortable during that state, and i've become quite adept at at least remaining composed and actually pulling myself out of it at will when I want. My point is: I'm fairly experienced in sleep paralysis and hallucinations, and this felt NOTHING like I've ever felt before.
The overall experience was almost exactly the same as in my first post: I was on my bed, in my same room, getting frequent intense full body tremors, all while remaining conscious.
However, during this time the whole atmosphere of my room felt very oppressive, just like in any other sleep paralysis experience. But at this time I wasn't having any visions and I actually had "limited movement"
I say that in quotations because I wasn't really moving my physical body, the same body typing this post, because it was totally paralysed. The best way I can describe it, as absurd as it sounds, is like if my consciousness instead of remaining in my paralyzed body, shifted to a parallel reality or dream world of sorts where everything is the same: my room, my bed, except I was inhabiting another version of my body wearing the same clothes, laying in the same position.
Anyway, while I was in this state, I retained full consciousness. I took the opportunity to experiment by thinking about stuff, and at one point I thought about my dog outside my bedroom door. As soon as I did, my face took an uncontrollable expression of feagrief. I felt my mouth open and it remained open for the rest of the experience to the point I could feel my tongue dry out. My theory on why I made that expression is because in my last experience, my dog was gone; and I feared that she would be gone again.
I tried standing up and walk to my door, but my body felt so heavy and would be janked back to the bed, like if gravity was 100x stronger. Moving was exhausting.
At one point I heard my parents wake up and do their morning routine. All the while I was trying to get out of the room ,trying to get up the bed, and even at one point I heard a weird noise right beside me, but since I was aware I was in an altered state of consciousness, I paid it no mind.
Eventually I managed to stand up and move to my door. I felt very weak, could barely walk, and I still retained my eye mask on my forehead and my frightened expression; I could only breathe through my mouth in heavy bursts.
My parents were having breakfast and discussing some stuff. This time, when I opened the door, the house was exactly the same and my dog was there. My parents paid me no mind and continued their talk.
For some reason I moved to the front door and I almost fell. My parents approached me and grabbed me by the arms to lift me up; they said nothing. Then they started dragging me back to my bed, and I got the idea to use that as an "anchor" to "wake up" in my real body.
Here's the weirdest part about this whole thing: as they were approaching my bed, I consciously started to move my REAL fingers, because I could barely feel the bed sheets. Each step they took, I could feel more of my bed.
Eventually, as my parents were sitting "me" on the edge of the bed, my consciousness gradually shifted to my real body. Once I was back, I felt all the oppressiveness gone, and felt like all the nerves on my body reactivated and I could move again. I
Now, why is this experience different than the previous one? (Other than the obvious reasons of my living room being different and my dog gone)
Because this time I'm sure this was NOT a dream, not even a lucid one, for 3 reasons:
-Unlike the previous experience, I NEVER fell asleep.
Think about when you are falling asleep, your consciousness slowly slips away. Then there's this period of unconsciousness, then you either suddenly appear in a dream or you wake up hours later. I've had lucid dreams before, and this void of consciousness between being awake and being in a dream is always there. That's why lucid dreamers do reality checks.
Last time I did say it was the smoothest transition into a dream I've ever had, but I did have this period of unconsciousness. This time I DIDN'T, because when I get sleep paralysis, there has never been a "skip" between being awake and being paralyzed. It's always gradual, and I'm fully conscious the whole time.
-Going hand in hand with the previous point: I NEVER woke up.
Now think about when you wake up. Regardless if you were dreaming or not, you either suddenly open your eyes and regain consciousness, or it happens gradually. If it happens gradually, at first you'll always feel groggy.
Last time, I distinctly remember suddenly waking up in a slight shock. This time I didn't. I didn't slowly regain consciousness either, because as I've mentioned, I was ALWAYS conscious, always awake; I just "shifted" bodies, and while I was doing that I could gradually feel my real body again.
Now, I've had experienced dreams where if something in the real world has a strong presence around me (noise, light, movement, temperature, wanting to pee, etc), that element will creep into whatever I'm dreaming, I'll notice that element, and then quickly wake up. But this felt different
Those Dream>>Awake transitions feel like taking a VR headset off This felt like crossfading two clips in a video sequence
And to cap this one off: when i "returned" to my body, my eye mask was on my forehead, my mouth was actually agape and my tongue was dry, just like it was during the whole experience
-Finally, the previous experience lasted 6 hours, but didn't feel like it because I was actually sleeping. Time is weird when you are dreaming, it can go too slow or too fast. In that case, those 6 hours went too fast.
This experience however, I'm sure lasted what I felt like it lasted, which was around an hour.
I mentioned earlier that this happened at around 5-5:10 AM (checked the clock when I began the exercise). My parents always wake up at 5:30 and start their breakfast around 6.
Also remember how I mentioned that I heard them having a conversation while I was walking to the door? When I returned to my body, they continued with that conversation, exactly where they left off.
So what was all that? My best guess is that I did get sleep paralysis, and a pretty long one. Due to its length, I had a more complex hallucination than normal
Cool, so why did I post it here instead of any other sub? Because this has NEVER happened to me before; not like this, not with this complexity, and not this quickly.
I've tried experimenting with lots of things before sleep: Wim Hof breathing, affirmations, visualization, subliminals, binaural beats, you name it. Most of the time I get a profound restful sleep, very cool dreams, and less commonly sleep paralysis, and while these are always wild, they don't last long at all.
Yet, the first ever couple instances I do TRE at night, I get some of the most intense experiences in my life, and not only that; but they are remarkably similar, with the most recent one building upon the first one in complexity and intensity.
Why is that? How is this technique so powerful? Does it even have something to do with my experiences or was it just a coincidence?
Part of me wants to test it again tonight but I think it's wiser to abstain from doing this before sleep, at least for a while, until I get more familiarized with the exercises and the sensations. To be clear I'm not afraid of it and I was never afraid during my experience; but I'm aware I found something that has proven to be very effective for me to induce altered states of consciousness, so Id rather take my time testing it.
I guess the last thing I can say is; Has anyone else ever experienced something similar to this after they've begun doing TRE?
Cheers!

And just so happened I am born the wrong race.
She said, yeh you are the same ethicty as our secret program. We can't have you getting misidentified as someone you are not. We gonna do some changes to your facial feature.
I called her out for bluffing.
She was like, don't you know who I am? I am cbi.
I said what the fuck is cbi.
Cia and fbi combined, never heard of it?
I am guessing she so happened to see some fbi of secret agent that were the same race as her. Or look alike...
Pretty racist shit man, if I gotta say so myself.

You know it’s pretty wrong when anybody cuts and runs at your lowest point in life definitely makes you feel a type away when you’re stuck with nobody in your corner going through one of the craziest times in your life, but it teaches you a whole new side of things that you’ll never forget. It’s all good. I’m used to fighting alone. The truth always comes out to see how many people to see how things unfolded recently, truly makes you want to become a dark person but the other day the man upstairs is making me see things so much more clear always stood in your corner when no one else did someday you will need them again

Hey everyone! I'm a TFT streamer and Competitive player, hit challenger every set since 4 (not this set! I'll tell you why). I've never posted on Reddit, but I felt like I had too many things I wanted to break down and have a conversation about. These thoughts were just too much for a Twitter post, and I'm really curious to hear how everyone else in the community feels :)!
Disclaimer: I love everyone at the TFT team, and have immense respect for everyone on it, and I know for a fact they all strive to make a product they are proud of. This post is out of love for the game.

1. Novelty in TFT / Set Mechanics: Regarding Novelty in TFT / Set Mechanics: In recent sets, it's clear that the TFT team is determined to create unique and memorable moments for players, which I appreciate. However, in their pursuit of these moments, they seem to have lost sight of the essence that made TFT so magical from the start.

We can all agree that Set 10 was a huge breath of fresh air coming off the turbo-boring set that was 9.5 where everyone equipped URF legend and popped tome 2-1 and prayed. Set 10 is, in my opinion, one of the greatest sets ever designed. Everything aligned perfectly and harmoniously (music pun!), the unit and trait design was near flawless, the set mechanic was a huge upgrade to Set 4/4.5's Chosen mechanic, and the 5 Costs really did feel like premium units. It was a homerun for TFT. (The numbers show that too for all you numbers people)
Moving on from 10 and coming into 11. It was glaring to me that in an attempt to reach the destination of creating novel moments in TFT they took the wrong road. Encounters might just be one of the worst types of game mechanics to ever exist (second only to shadow items). It's a disaster lottery draw every single time it shows up that you dread won't destroy the path that you calculated was the most optimal path based on what you've gotten so far in terms of units, items, augments, etc... The main reason why Encounters are bad game design is because they take away player agency in an unhealthy way. That doesn't mean that there can't be potential encounter type mechanics that borrow player agency that are healthy. It just means this one is bad. It's a lot of quantity over quality and it leaves the player in this weird middle-ground where they're not too impactful to create a sense of excitement and awe when they pop up, but they're just useful enough to be extremely annoying when they don't benefit you at all, and accelerate other people's boards. (Obviously this isn't ALL encounters, but definitely most)

1. Unit and Trait design: Set 11 brings some of the most lackluster / boring feeling units and traits I've ever had the un-pleasure of playing. If you named all your favorite TFT units / Traits of all time do you think any of set 11's Units / Traits would make it into your S-Tier category? (Maybe Lissandra, but she's just a worse Set 6 Tahm Kench lets be real) and apart from the idea behind Exalted (It needs more work, but can be an amazing way of introducing infinite comps) not much in Set 11 stands out to me on that front. I'll delve deeper into a few things I don't want to bloat this post, but just know there's a lot more. Kayle is one of, if not the worst summon unit we've ever had in TFT. The idea behind build your own summon unit is fantastic and I genuinely hope they give this another go, but the execution was suboptimal at best. Sets 3 / 4 / 6 / 10 All had extremely life-like and memorable summons Giant Mech Garen that thrusts down sword into the arena, Giant Galio slamming into the arena and punching units to death, Bears and dragons to buff your team and fight alongside you, and even a Hecarim that gallops onto your board and buffs your team and slashes enemies. Summoned units SHOULD feel, sound, and look impactful, and not act like any unit I could buy from the store. Or else they just end up being a glorified 2 cost. Stats aside (I love stats, but this post isn't about them), my primary aim is to ensure a fun game before delving into statistical analysis. Kayle feels like a filler unit that you mostly just plop in the back and forget about, doesn't do much unless you hit the crazy (mostly unobtainable) 10 Piece trait. Speaking of unobtainable traits. It seems to me the TFT team has come up with this bandage solution of gatekeeping a lot of really fun and exciting moments behind these extremely hard-to-obtain 9-10 Piece traits. We've never had this issue in TFT; why are we now gatekeeping a lot of the exciting moments behind 100+ hours of playtime. You can tone down a lot of the exciting moments, and still keep them accessible, but challenging to obtain. You've done this for the longest time; why fix something that isn't broken. Personally, I think there needs to be a revaluation of what makes a Set engaging and fun, and what players really want to see and play around with for hundreds of hours way before you start delving into the mindset of "How do we add as much divergence, nuance, and novelty". Those roads can meet and intertwine, but they aren't the same road.
2. Items, Augments, and Orbs!: Items - Here's a little brain exercise for everyone, what would happen in TFT if we removed all item components, and strictly dropped only Ornn anvils all game? (Take a minute to think before you click the spoiler!) If you guessed it would ensue chaos, bugs, and a balancing nightmare. OR be a hell of a lot of fun! you'd be correct both ways! (New portal idea!/s) Luckily for us, that isn't the case. However, I do think we've reached a point with items where we're too comfortable with what they wish to achieve on units, and this creates a dynamic where TFT units are always being designed with items in mind, and how the items would make the unit work. Rather than creating fun and engaging units in a vacuum and worrying about the items later. It's a scary prospect to experiment with the tried and true (Think back to Set 7 when they made Rage-wing trait experimenting with units that had a different fuel source than mana, but it was a total miss or when they created the dreaded Shadow items), but it's just food for thought. Just because you didn't get it right once, doesn't mean the idea is flawed, just means you didn't get it right that one time. A time where you definitely did get it right however, is Radiant items Look how those turned out! Some of the most beloved items of all time. This is sort of what they wanted to achieve with the new expansion to the Ornn anvil items, and support items. It's definitely a step in the right direction, but can definitely be explored more.

Augments - Augments really was a happy little accidental shift in TFT's life cycle. They created the perfect concoction of how to add an almost infinite amount of variability to a game that was missing just that. (Which also adds to why Encounters are redundant and frustrating) Since then they've time and time again created really fun and engaging augments each set, that without I'm almost certain TFT wouldn't be as popular as it is. Please keep doing this, this is really good. Another little thought exercise before we continue. What would happen if most of the Encounters were just turned into Augments instead? (Think a little before you click spoiler!) If You guessed it would just create a healthier way of interacting with said encounters. You'd be correct!
If you're trying to create a new set mechanic (encounters) it shouldn't overlap with something that already exists that's just better than the new thing you're trying to create (augments). However, getting back on track. It does feel like things have gotten a little too comfortable in the Augment space, and feels like there hasn't been much room for innovative change. There's an untapped reservoir right in front of you of infinite variability at your disposal. Why aren't you experimenting harder, instead of looking for other means of adding variability that will always be suboptimal to the one you've already created almost 6 Sets ago...?
Soft Sample Examples: A new type of Augment called Radiant Augments that provide a wide range of very strong / borderline insane combinations of items and stats, but the catch is after every player combat if you lose you can choose if you want to swap your Radiant augment with the player you just faced. (Like multiple random hexes of strong stats, or 3 tailored Orrn items / Support items, or given 3 zephyrs and knowing who you're fighting next or given a 2Star-dragon that adopts your top-most trait?!) (The design space is infinite)
Orbs - Lastly, I'd like to talk about Orbs! Orbs are a lot better, good job! That's all I have to say :)!
Thank you for reading this far into my post if you have. Again, this comes from an immense love for the game and the people creating it. I have nothing but positive interactions with Mortdog on Twitter / Discord and would appreciate if you guys keep it civil and friendly :)! I really do have a lot more thoughts, and things I'd love to share, but I feel like I've already bloated this post a lot! (Assassins, Higher Cost units than 5, Midsets, system changes, loot management, meta knowledge, Portals etc..)
I've just been really bored playing this set, and that's the reason I've retired from seriously competing or climbing for this one set, and I'm very keen to read what other people have to say about my thoughts, and looking forward to discussing it thank you!

(Please bear with me. This is kind of a long story.)
I have an aunt from my dad’s side who I don’t really get along with. She says and does hurtful things to me. Let me give a few examples:

1. I was being bullied at work by my managers and coworkers, which unfortunately continued after I stood up to them and told my boss everything. When I told my aunt that, she said, “That’s why you don’t go tattle.” I felt like, by her saying that, she was telling me that it was my fault that I got bullied, or that I deserved it. I tried telling her that it wasn’t tattling, but she insisted it was and told me I “wasn’t gonna change the world.” That didn’t help at all. In fact, it just made me feel worse. She called me a tattletale and also a tittybaby. When I was telling her the story again one day, I got to the part where I was telling her about how I begged the assistant manager to go home, on the verge of tears, while two of my coworkers were yelling and swearing at me. At that point, she said, “That was being a tittybaby.”
   
2. One night, I was talking to her on the phone and I said that I was having pizza for dinner. Then she sarcastically said, “You can’t live off of pizza, Taylor.” I replied, “I know.” “Well just a couple of days ago, you were eating pizza.” I had pizza twice in a week. So what? What’s the big deal? And what’s it to her anyway? Why is it any of her business? Besides, I didn’t plan on it, it just kind of happened. Honestly, I felt insulted. That’s the best word I can use to describe it.
   
3. I told her my parents were going out of town for a camping trip on my birthday, and she said, “Oh, that was nice. They couldn’t have waited until after your birthday?” implying it was a crappy thing for them to do. I never thought of it that way until she said that, then I accepted it as true. Several days later, I told her that she wasn’t alone in feeling that way, because I told a couple other people about it and they agreed that sucked. Her response? “Taylor, quit whining about it. You’re 22 years old.” She said one thing and then she said something else that contradicted the first thing. I was confused. I didn’t think I was whining about it. It’s not like I told 50 other people about it, just two acquaintances, and the only reason I said that was because the subject of my birthday came up in conversation.
   
4. Sometimes, when I call her, she answers the phone with, “Yeah, Taylor?” in an annoyed tone. Y’know, in a way that sounds like I’m disturbing her from something she’d rather be doing. I feel like she might as well be saying, “What do you want?” or something like that.
   
5. She badmouthed my friend, essentially calling him a shitty, untrustworthy person, all because I told her he told me that a couple of the people we worked with called me retarded and one said to the other, “Hey, let’s bully Taylor into quitting.” Here’s the thing, though: she told me that my mom was a drug addict from the moment her parents died until her death a few years later. She had been struggling with depression and would ask around for pain medicine and, later on, money from family so she could buy it herself. Every few Saturday morning, my mom and I would go to Walmart really early in the morning. For the longest time, I thought I was just innocent motheson bonding time, but because of my aunt, I found out that the real reason behind that was so she could meet her dealer in private. My aunt knew all of that would hurt my feelings, but that didn’t stop her from telling me about it. She argued, “What positives came out of him telling you that?” Well, what positives came out of me finding out that my mom was a drug addict? Hmm? Hypocrisy.
   Because of all this and more, I decided to go no contact with her. I thought that it would only be healthy for me to keep some distance from her. So from January until April this year, I didn’t reach out to her at all. A month or so into this, I even blocked her number. And honestly? It was relieving and peaceful, like a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.
   April rolls around and, on a Friday, her husband (my uncle) tries to call me, but I don’t answer because I’m at work. Two days later, I called him back, and he answered. My aunt was talking in the background. Immediately, she confronted me about how she hadn’t heard from me in months, saying that it was wrong and very immature of me to do that and that I can’t just cut people out of my life because they said or did something that I didn’t agree with or pissed me off. Especially family. I told her about a couple of the grievances that I had with her and we got into a heated argument.
   According to her, when she said, “That’s why you don’t tattle,” what she was trying to convey was that there’s repercussions around everything that you do. In other words, actions have consequences. She could punch all of those people in the face because of how they treated me, she would. I asked her if she would say the same thing to a child that continues to get bullied after they told the teacher about it and she said that a child that school and an adult at work are two different scenarios. When you’re an adult and it’s your job, you have to weigh things out and be very careful about what you tell your boss because most of the time, it will backfire and you will get treated worse. And I warned you about this, yet you still did it, so that’s part of the reason why I called you a tattletale, because I was upset and frustrated that you did something opposite of what I said.
   She never said that to me. I don’t remember that AT ALL. I feel gaslighted.
   Her other defense for her using the words tattletale and tittybaby was that I was talking about something that we had already talked about, so her patience was running thin. Then she at least should’ve said, “Taylor, you’re being a titty baby right now,” that way, I would’ve known that she was calling me a titty baby in the present moment and not because of how I acted in the past. But ofc, she still would have been calling me a name. (Btw, I looked up the definition of titty baby, and it means someone who is unusually whiny, timid, or cowardly.)
   The reason why she told me to quit “whining” about my parents going out of town on my birthday was, again, that I was talking about an already-discussed thing and she was just in a bad mood and having a bad day.
   The conversation didn’t go well and we had to end it. An hour later, she sent me a long text message saying that her emotions are raw and her feelings are so hurt. I come to find out that these past few months have been pretty rough on her because her son had a heart attack and almost died and had to spend weeks in the hospital. She felt like she deserved an apology because in that time that I went no contact with her, I could have been at the hospital with her. She said that it’s never her intention to hurt my feelings and that if she did she was sorry. She’s always loved me like one of her own children and how other people treat me are her foremost worry.
   Later, I discovered that she tried to call me and left a voicemail a week before.
   

“Well hey, Taylor. This is your long lost aunt and I was just wondering that I guess I must’ve really said something or didn’t agree with you about something for you to totally shun me for the last couple months. Russell had a heart attack and almost died and things have gone on, yet you haven’t reached out or nothing with me. I love you, but I find it weird. Bye.”
Lemme also note that I’ve tried talking to her about these things and how they made me feel before, but those conversations didn’t really go anywhere. She justified them.
AITAH?
[TL;DR I kept distance from my aunt for a months-long period because she said and did hurtful things to me on multiple occasions and she got upset about it.]

Looking for either reassurance on my message or advice. For reference- I’ve been taking the kids to school in the mornings this year. We get the kids every other weekend and have them on the weekdays. The oldest child we have full time. I really love the two little ones but from time to time if the oldest is in a bad enough mood she turns them against me. Boyfriend and I have been together for 1 years 3months and we have a very strong connection and great communication/understanding of each other.
•Chevelle is the dog my boyfriend (the kids dad) got for me in January. •Jezi is the 15 year old dark cloud •Elizette is the 10 year old •Vincent is the 6 year old.
Anyway my message reads as follows… “Jezi is on one this morning. I get it she has a mood disorder but she is extremely disrespectful to me. She had Vincent relay a rude message to me this morning saying "Jezi told me to tell you do you really have to take Chevelle everywhere." Then I confront her about it and she acts like she didn't say that but then proceeds to literally talk shit to me in front of the kids. Elizette has had a crappy attitude towards me lately too and I'm sure it's because Jezi just bad mouths me to her. Jezi is really good at making me feel like shit and it's starting to really affect me, no matter how hard I try to coexist and not let her get to me. It's really the disrespect that I'm not going to live with.
Moving forward I will be going back to our old schedule- in the mornings when you leave to work I'll be leaving, and then after you guys have had your family dinner I'll come over to workout with you. The weekends I'll stay as long as you're home.
I feel like a mockery when you're not around and I'm not going to spend my time doing things for people who don't respect me. I think Jezi will be happier this way too. If that's even a word that can be used to describe her. I'm sorry to take it to this point but I don't want to be around if you're not.
I love you.”

What is the goal of Zen practice/study?

The Four Statements are explicit: see self nature, become a Buddha.
Huangbo talks about the futility of seeking Buddha outside of mind:

Therefore, if you students of the Way seek to progress through seeing, hearing, feeling and knowing, when you are deprived of your perceptions, your way to Mind will be cut off and you will find nowhere to enter. Only realize that, though real Mind is expressed in these perceptions, it neither forms part of them nor is separate from them. You should not start REASONING from these perceptions, nor allow them to give rise to conceptual thought; yet nor should you seek the One Mind apart from them or abandon them in your pursuit of the Dharma. Do not keep them nor abandon them nor dwell in them nor cleave to them. Above, below and around you, all is spontaneously existing, for there is nowhere which is outside the Buddha-Mind.

Not apart from, not abandoning the senses.
Yet meditation is an attempt to abandon reality, seeking abandonment of senses, isolation from them, to seek a "realer" experience.

Mediation is just prayer: seeking mind with mind

Foyan warns against seeking mind with mind explicitly:

Now if I say this to people, they think I am criticizing every­one else, but if I do not talk about it, it will be hard to elucidate. Zen teachers of a certain type say to people, “ Fools! Why don’t you understand this thing?” First they make a cliche of “your own mind,” then try to use the mind to realize it. This is called driving a spike into a stump and then running and round the the stump. They pass it on this way, and it is taken up this way, knocking on their chairs and holding up their whisks. This is called trying to use the mind by means of the mind.

Of course Huangbo is going to eviscerate all seeking of any kind:

When the people of the world hear it said that the Buddhas transmit the Doctrine of the Mind, they suppose that there is something to be attained or realized apart from Mind, and thereupon they use Mind to seek the Dharma, not knowing that Mind and the object of their search are one. Mind cannot be used to seek something from Mind; for then, after the passing of millions of aeons, the day of success will still not have dawned. Such a method is not to be compared with suddenly eliminating conceptual thought, which is the fundamental Dharma. Suppose a warrior, forgetting that he was already wearing his pearl on his forehead, were to seek for it elsewhere, he could travel the whole world without finding it. But if someone who knew what was wrong were to point it out to him, the warrior would immediately realize that the pearl had been there all the time. So, if you students of the Way are mistaken about your own real Mind, not recognizing that it is the Buddha, you will consequently look for him elsewhere, indulging in various achievements and practices and expecting to attain realization by such graduated practices.

Meditation and prayer: distinguishing self/other, mind/body, practice/life

It's easy to get lost in the texts when you don't take the time to understand them, carefully testing.

The most completely successful form of zealous application is the absence from your minds of all such distinctions as 'my body', 'my mind'. As soon as you begin to seek for something outside your own Mind, you are like [a butcher trying to find the organ where the soul resides].

.

Welcome! ewk comment: People get really angry that this forum isn't about meditation... but they don't get angry about their ignorance of 1,000 years of Zen historical records, not prayer manuals, not mythological sutra fables. Why is that?

I had surgery on March 1st so I’m about three months post op and can I just say I never thought I would feel this happy and at home in this lifetime. It’s unbelievable and feels like each day is a dream. Here are some unexpected joys/benefits I’ve had and I hope everyone will share theirs as well!
No bindebra to limit movement which allows for better dance moves 🕺
Heartburn has decreased by at least 75%
Rolling over in my sleep and not feeling my chest collide into itself like those toys with the balls you bang together
Breathing deeply and fully without the added weight of two meat racks
Throwing a shirt on and not having to adjust myself in the mirror until I’m ready to cry and cancel my plans
Cat can now lay directly on my chest and over my heart (his purrs and my heartbeat is the perfect relaxation combo)
I can wash my lower half in the shower without squishing ten pounds of tissue into my stomach (tying my shoes is easier as well)
Hugging feels amazing
Eliminating neck/shoulderib pain
Going for walks and not immediately having to come home and rip my binder off cause two gallons of sweat have appeared underneath it
And probably the best overall, feeling like I’m real for the first time. I’m able to show up authentically and genuinely in all aspects of my life cause it finally feels like I’m in the game and not on the sidelines.
Share your own experiences or things you’re looking forward to! Top surgery is 1000% the most wonderful gift I’ve ever given myself.

link to google doc for the questionnaire, but this post will have some simpler info if you don't want to read through all of that. Just let me know if you used the doc for your evaluation or not, please!
recent sociotype test result: https://sociotype.xyz/i=8c0ZY6vJW2Olr9

• I consider myself hyper-empathetic. I tend to feel emotions very strongly and it took me a very long time to understand why I would feel things that I didn't have a reason to feel! When I'm physically around others I can get overwhelmed with different emotions, it creates a very physical reaction in my body... I usually get goosebumps or shivers down my back! Thankfully I have learned how to ground myself as I've gotten older.
• My friends and family say I'm really good at reading others! One of my friend's says it's "eerie" though... I try to keep my revelations to myself as I learned to associate my deduction skills with unnecessary intrusion/invasion of privacy.
  
• When typing myself, I found myself molding around anything I read. I could find myself relating 100% to... EVERYTHING??? I had to take a break from evaluating my typology because of the constant state of confusion I found myself in
  
• I have typed myself as ENFP (age 14), INFP (ages 15-17), INTP (ages 18-19), ENTP (age 19), ISTP (age 19), and INFJ (in that order)
  
• I've been typed by others as ESFP (age 15), ENFJ (ages 15-16), INFJ (age 16), and ENTP (ages 18-19) (in that order).
  
• as for ennea types, I have been typed as sp7/sx7, sx5, e6, and so4.
  
• I have a very strong relationship with my siblings, who are both Fe dominant (ESFJ and ENFJ). I especially spend a lot of time with my brother (ESFJ), who is a little over a year younger than me. I tend to be a listener more than anything, but I do my best to engage every once in a while to make sure he doesn't feel like he's talking to a brick wall!
  
• I hate today's politics. I find most debates quite meaningless and solutions so easy to implement, but nothing is being solved. However, my brother really enjoys politics, so I just try to remain calm when heated topics are brought up
  
• I love music. I place a lot of power on it as I believe it has the ability to bring differing individuals together; to initiate mutual understanding/basic empathy.
  
• I love analyzing lyrics and possible themes the most. Because of this, I am able to enjoy various genres.
  
• Recently I've been craving physical activity more, I've never been big on working out, sports, or being out in nature. But something about it is really intriguing to me now?
  
• I was a very social child, I attempted to make friends with everyone/anyone I could. I craved connection and understanding... I was often picked on/bullied due to this. I was seen as overly eager, gullible, and just plain "weird" for trying to chime in. This led to a very isolating adolescence. I learned that being invisible was safer than to be rejected or hurt...
  
• I do not have any "childhood friends", my first real friend was made in 6th grade. They were sitting alone with a sketchbook, I decided to give them company for some reason. I'm glad I did though because are still friends to this day :]
  

Okay I think that's about it!! Thanks for reading this, if you did!

DISCLAIMER: I did not transcribe this myself, though I could. I had a machine do it, and then the machine threw up afterwards -- but I did go through and add some bullety points while Jamie shot off her mouth. It's a total word salad, but one has only to skim through and see the number of ways she yawns and yawps and contradicts herself ... and does not take a breath, so there is very little punctuation. Again it's a run-on slog and the AI program chose to only use periods to end 70-some sentences because of all the run-on "like ... you know ... and ... but" instances as she ran with it -- with NO BOUNDARIES WHATSOVER. I did take out the kids' names, and I did search-and-replace all instances of "to" with "tuh" because that IS how they talk!
ENJOY -- and I use that word lightly:
AND SO IT BEGINS WITH Doug wishing Happy Mother's Day … and immediately Jamie corrects him, "Well, not really Mother's Day …" since they are recording after Mother's Day. Got get those Doug corrections in toot sweet, lest he thinks he has a mind of his own.
They note they tend to be "a little late on things," but they are "trying to get better about that." Doug says they had a fantastic Mother's Day, and he asked her if she had a good time. She said she had a great time. Doug wrote Happy Mother's Day on some cards and the kids drew on them. He gave her an eyelash waxing and noted probably a bad idea. She said it wasn't that she wasn't thrilled as she did mention that pregnancy makes her eyebrows bushy, but she was scared, maybe just mentioned she'd need to tweeze, but oh, well, yes, she likes his gift.
Jamie noted that it was "just the four of us" and of course, the babies in her belly, and that was fine with her – until her son's birthday of course, when she noted that their entire families suck!
So onto her son's birthdays and THESE GEMS AND THOUGHTS: I think it's just pregnancy hormones, but honestly, like, I just, I just can't, like, I don't know why, like, I guess, like, you know, ever since I was little, I've always really, really wanted family, like, so badly, like, I wanted just, like, deep connections with people who truly love me, and I truly love them, and we just really, truly support each other, and just, I don't know, I think, like, just pregnancy hormones made me think about it, but, like, yesterday for Son's birthday, and just family members who just completely forgot, and they just don't care, and I'm like, is it me? Is it him?
Like, and I don't want my son tuh grow, like, he doesn't know, and he'll never know, because I'll make sure, I mean, I spent every second, that boy had no second tuh think yesterday, like, I picked him up from school, and I took him tuh the library, because that's where he wanted tuh go, and then we, like, you know, we really love surprises in this family, if that's not clear by now, and so Daughter and I surprised him with a splash pad, like, we went tuh the splash pad for the first time, and we never do things like that on a school night, and so, and then he got tuh go pick out a cake that he wanted, and then Doug had dinner already at home, and then also we had decorations in his bedroom, which I was, like, hoping tuh have for the morning, but then Doug was, like, at, like, midnight, when we're, like, thinking about starting tuh blow up the balloons, Doug is like, Jamie, let's just surprise him tomorrow after school.

(Notice she takes no breath … and also they were super-last minute when it came tuh getting ready for his birthday, versus, what we have all mentioned, that isn't so when it's a gender reveal or a party or pickleball or something FOR HER.)
HERE, DOUG ASKS … "WHY, ARE WE GONNA DO THIS NOW?" AND THIS WAS PRETTY MUCH THE LAST EFFORT HE MADE tuh STOP HER BECAUSE SHE WENT ON WITH: Yeah, because it was so late, but I was like, I just have, like, this vision that I just wanted for him, because, you know, I'm just trying tuh give them the childhood that, like, I would have wanted, that any little kid would want, and really all that involves is truly just two loving parents who are there, and, like, that's really all that really involves, but if I can go a little extra, you know, and surprise him, and I, then I want to, you know, and so, you know.
DOUG NOTES THAT HE DOESN'T THINK THEY KNOW ANY DIFFERENT, AND HE CONTINUES WITH: I don't think they really know any different, you know, and I know, I know it's, it's tough, and I think, especially with, like, little kids, you know, they, they won't necessarily feel the impact and that want, you know, and, and I know that you do, and it, it hurts me that, you know, you would, you would want people tuh care enough to, tuh reach out, and I think, you know, for, for me, I, that's, I don't really set my expectations or, or give those expectations tuh son and daughter.
JAMIE BLASTS BACK, SUPER-DEFENSIVELY: Oh, I do not either, though. I do not at all. I don't say a thing tuh them about anything, because, you know, sometimes people miss their – you know, and that happens sometimes, but when it's, like, over, and over, and over again, and, like, it's just so obvious, and, and people ask us why we moved tuh Florida, and don't we want tuh be near family, and, you know, tuh be very honest, this is why.
Like, we, you know, I, we would fly up there tuh try tuh prove, like, hey, listen, we're not just trying tuh leave, though. Like, we, we, I want that family connection so badly with your family, with my family, and it's just, you know, unfortunately, it's, people are in different stages of life. I try tuh make excuses, like, for them, and, you know, for us, and it's probably not personal, but the point of the matter is, is that whether it's not personal, and people are busy, and whatever the case may be, we don't have that family connection.
We just don't, and I'm, I try tuh nurture it, and, um, you know, and we do with some family members, and then just others, you know, you just, it's just. Well, you can't help but be disappointed. Yeah, and, like, I guess my heart hurts, because I want our son, and our daughter, and our children tuh have just so many people who love them, and want tuh be around them, and who will encourage them, and support them, and.
DOUG NOTES THAT HE THINKS FAMILY KNOW ALL OF THIS AND THAT THEY, THE KIDS KNOW HOW MUCH LOVE THEY HAVE FOR THEM, AND ALL THE EFFORTS THEY PUT FORTH, AND HERE HE SAYS, "Especially you," AND THAT ALL OF THIS IS WHAT MATTERS MOST.
JAMIE'S REBUTTAL: Yeah, I know, but Doug, what I'm trying tuh say is that, like, what I would want for them is them tuh have many people who love them, and, like, you know, like, I always wanted, you know, it's not even a secret, like, way back, I'm married at first, like, the one thing I wanted was tuh marry into a family, like, a big loving family that would welcome me as their own, and, and I'm really thankful for your family, and, yeah, but, like, I just feel like, like, I want that for our kids. Like, I wanted them tuh have people who loved them, who wanted tuh come around them.
Like, my, my siblings and I really didn't have many aunts or uncles or grandparents who, I mean, you know, it's kind of, it's so long, because, like, there are some people who were there, but it was, like, toxic, and aye, aye, aye, it's just, you know, it's just, at the end of the day, I'm pregnant, and it's just hormones, and I know our kids feel nothing but loved, but it's just really evident, like, on a birthday or holidays, like, people who, who actually, like, family who actually truly cares for us, and, like, all I've ever wanted was just our, like, I, I don't know why I care about these people caring about me, when, like, they don't care, and it's okay, and that's, that's, it's okay.
Like, it, I'm trying so hard tuh just be, like, accept it, girl. Like, you know, you can't force family tuh love you.
JAMIE TRIES TO DIFFUSE THE TIMEBOMB SITUATION THAT IS HIS WIFE, CLEARLY GOING OFF ON EVERYBODY BY SAYING HE KNOWS THAT SHE DOESN'T WANT THIS FOR THEM BUT THAT THEY, THE KIDS, DON'T EVEN NOW ABOUT ALL OF THIS RIGHT NOW.
JAMIE'S REBUTTAL: Well, I know they don't, and so, at the end of the day, I was, like, sitting in bed crying earlier, and I was, like, what is wrong with me, because I know my son had a great birthday yesterday. Like, I made sure of it.
DOUG NOTES SHE "KILLED IT, YESTERDAY."
JAMIE BLASTS ON: At the end of the day, I think, like, it's a personal thing, because it's, like, they don't care about me, and therefore, they don't care about my son, and that hurts, you know? Like, it's just hurtful, and not, because I care about them, and I love them, and I've tried so hard tuh be part of them, and, and try to, like, I've tried changing my ways. I've tried tuh adapt tuh be more like them.
I've tried all these different things. At the end of the day, nothing I do, like, I may as well just be myself, and, and, because if I have tried tuh be like them, they don't like me. If I try tuh be myself, they don't like me.
Like, no matter what, like, I don't feel like, I feel like they're, I'm just kind of judged by them in the way that I live my life, and anyways, it's fine, but.
DOUG COUNTERS IT WITH THE FACT THAT JAMIE GOES "ABOVE AND BEYOND FOR EVERYBODY," AND THAT IT'S TOUGH THAT SHE "WANTS OR EXPECTS THAT IN RETURN," BUT NOTES THAT THIS IS ALSO MAYBE WHERE THE "BOUNDARIES" LIE … cool, they now have a title for the podcast!
JAMIE CONTINUES tuh BLAST: Well, no, of course, and this is exactly why I'm also crying happy tears, because for so long, I just really tried tuh nurture, like, a true, like, true family, and deep connection, and like, try tuh be, like, really close, and, and it's like, well, if you're the only person nurturing that, you're bound tuh get hurt. It's bound, it's not going tuh happen ever, because it has tuh be a two-way street, and so, unfortunately, like, I started putting up boundaries, and I knew it was going tuh hurt, and like, here it is. It's, it's hurting, you know, like, and then inevitably, they'll be like, you know, you moved tuh Florida, but even when we didn't live in Florida, let's be honest, like, we didn't see family very often, unless, like, it was, it just, unless it was us going places, and then even when we moved here, I would fly up there.
I flew up, we were flying up there, like, once a month. It was so expensive. It was so taxing, but I just wanted to, tuh kind of prove, hey, listen, like, but, you know, I'm so glad we moved here, because at the end of the day, you know, even if we never even find our own people, like, our focus is on our core family, like, we had zero distractions for Son yesterday, like, his birthday was the hundred, like, and it's just, that feels good, because normally, we wouldn't have that. Yeah, normally, I would be cleaning the house, trying tuh prep for people tuh come over, who I would have called 10 times, make sure they remember that he's coming, and it's like, or that his birthday is coming, and it's like, it's just, you know, this is such a vulnerable, I don't even know if I want tuh share any of this, because it's just so personal, but.
DOUG NOTES THAT ALL REFLECTS MORE ABOUT OTHERS AND NOT AN ATTACK ON JAMIE.
AND YET JAMIE CONTINUES TO DEFLECT AND ATTACK: No, I don't think it is either, but it's just very evident where people, like, if people care about us and our family, I don't think they actually, that's the thing, is they don't, like, and so, they're not thinking about it one way or the other, it doesn't even matter tuh them, and that's what hurts, because I wish that they cared about us the way that we cared about them, but they don't, and so, that's why I'm trying tuh have the boundaries tuh be like, find people who will care about you then, or just focus on your own family, and if people wonder why I want so many kids, well, there you go. People constantly say, why don't you love the two you have?
Oh, of course I do, and I'll tell you what, I want tuh have 10 more, because I want tuh raise them in a way where we love each other, we're always there for each other, we don't forget. It's just silly little milestones, it's not about presents, it's not about anything other than just love, and remembrance, and just, like, celebrating each other, and I am going tuh raise my kids tuh just really love each other, and tuh know that their parents love them, but God forbid, one of us are taken, and then, then it's like, I think about things like that, and I'm like, who do they have if they don't have us? Like, seriously, and that scares the crap out of me, because there are very few people who even remember, like, and tuh me, it's just a birthday, I know, it doesn't really matter, but like, that's of significance tuh that child, and people just don't care, like, they just, our fam, so many of our family members just don't care. Well, we make, we make it, and then I'm like, am I making a mountain out of a molehill, but like, and am I?
DOUG ALSO THINKS ABOUT THEM "DEPARTING EARLY" AND WHAT HAPPENS tuh THEM.
JAMIE BUSTS BACK IN, AND STARTS tuh TALK ABOUT "ESTATE PLANNING," WHICH SORT OF MADE ME SIDEYE BECAUSE SHE GOES ON tuh TALK ABOUT THE KIDS AND WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO THEM, AS IF THEY WERE PART OF THE "ESTATE," BUT I GUESS SINCE THEY ARE THE MONEYMAKERS SHE THINKS OF IT MORE IN THAT WAY THAN GUARDIANSHIP PAPERWORK … AND SO SHE CONTINUES: Well, when you think about estate planning, and then who you're leaving your kids to, and I'm like, who can I leave my kids to, who are really going tuh love them, and the people right now didn't even call tuh wish him happy birthday, they didn't even call tuh wish him a happy birthday, they didn't send a gift, and it's not even about the gift, but it's about the thought, who do we have in our life, Doug? I don't think it's, you know, I ask if I think I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, but then I, like, I almost, like, talk, like, convince myself that, no, I'm not, like, I'm really trying tuh make sure that our kids are taken, like, loved and taken care of, and sure, we've got it out, down pat, but what happens, like, then what?
And like, I'm not gonna go down that rabbit hole, and I'm sure this is all pregnancy hormones, and I'm just exhausted and tired, so, but I just think about these things, and then, and then people wonder why I am so thankful for our followers, for those of you listening tuh the podcast, and those of you who follow us on Instagram and YouTube, and who are just excited for us, because a lot of our own family members aren't, like, it's just wild, and so, yeah, and so thank you for those of you listening, and for those of you who comment, and just, you know, just are excited to, like, like, tuh be part of our family, like, because we have forever been looking for that, and, like, our family's just not that interested, and we could try, and try, and try.
DOUG: Out of sight, out of mind.
JAMIE BINGOS!!!!! THAT THOUGHT AND CONTINUES: Yeah, it's, and it's fine, but I'll tell you what, I genuinely do appreciate every single five-star review, every single, like, nudge that you just, every single moment that you take out of your life just tuh be like, hey, what's up with Jamie, you know, and that's why I try tuh do giveaways, and I try to, you know, like, read your five-star reviews, and I try tuh show you that I genuinely care about you, too, because I really think that it is a two-way street with everything in life, like, so whether it's, you know, family, it's friends, it's working, it's, we're colleagues, like, if someone is showing you a lot of, you know, any support, or encouragement, or care, like, then that's the person that you should then go show love, support, and encouragement, and care to, whether they're family or not, and unfortunately, if family doesn't seem tuh show you that, well, then you do have tuh set up boundaries, and it hurts, like, h-e-l-l, because then you'll start to, when you stop reaching out as much, well, then you'll start seeing that your relationship becomes even more distant, but you can't constantly break your back tuh try tuh make relationships.
DOUG NOTES THAT THEY EITHER STEP UP OR DON'T, AND THAT’S WHERE IT LANDS.
JAMIE CONTINUES: Yeah, but from what, from my experience, from what we've experienced, you know, no one really steps up, and it's pretty evident when you start, when you realize you have tuh make a boundary with a person, like, just know in your heart that it's gonna hurt, like, you know, and I'm sure that we're, I'm not the only person going through this, and that's, I think, why it's important tuh share, is that, you know, because it's hard tuh share these things.
It's embarrassing. It's, I feel, it's almost, like, belittling. It's like, like, you know, it's like you're, you're sharing that you're rejected, essentially.
Who wants tuh share that? Like, who wants tuh admit that? But the truth is, is that we all have been there, and so I think that the biggest way tuh heal, and what I've learned is, of course, tuh find, to, like, lean in on the people who don't, like, desert you, betray you, talk behind your back.
I mean, that's the thing, is people who also, who are there, but they're really, like, kind of a snake in disguise, and, like, it's, like, like, they, it seems like they're there for you, but then behind, but you're walking on eggshells around them, because you know that they're saying things behind your back, and that's not, that's not healthy either, and so what I've really tried tuh do is really just focus on people that have really just been loving and nurturing, and the more people are loving and nurturing tuh me, whether they're family or not, the more I will lead, like, reach into them, and...
DOUG BUSTS IN TO TAKE A "QUICK PAUSE" FOR AN AD, IRONICALLY ABOUT INVESTING AND GOOD FINANCIAL HYGEINE.
JAMIE GETS RIGHT BACK TO IT: Of course, holidays and birthdays are tough because like you want like my mom like I mean forget it but like I love her and she's doing the best she can but like you know it's like I don't know I guess it's because I'm pregnant and then like when you become a mom and you just think about this relationship and it's like I just have always wanted that relationship with my mom and of course I know real like logically it's not gonna happen but anyways it's um it's just hard but anyways what I was trying tuh say tuh you though listening is like if you're going through this type of situation like just know that you're doing the right thing by kind of putting the boundaries up and then kind of you know you got tuh focus on gratitude more than anything else and so I consistently try tuh remind myself tuh be thankful that I am alive I'm able tuh be there for my kids my son has no idea who remembered and who forgot his birthday but of course he knows who he talked tuh but like you know I, I know that he had the most spectacular day yesterday and I made darn well sure of it and it literally cost me like zero dollars tuh it's not like it has tuh be expensive it wasn't extravagant we went tuh the library which is free and then we went tuh a free splash pad that's in our city and slash playground yeah, yeah and he had a great time so it's like people it's because the other thing people say well if you can afford tuh give them that it's like it doesn't you can find ways tuh live tuh like really bless your family and your kids without having tuh spend boatloads of money um but the biggest message and takeaway of this all and I guess of like I we never planned on sharing any of this we were planning on sharing about mother's day and
DOUG DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT tuh SAY, BUT SHE NEEDS tuh KNOW HOW PROUD HE IS OF HER, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH …
SHE THANKS HIM QUICKLY AND THEN GETS ON WITH HIS always getting by my side and like when I'm thankful for you when I started you know going tuh therapy and, and I mean forever ago I'm telling you forever ago when we were first married and I first started going tuh a therapist outside of married at first sight she told me she looked me in the eyes and she said Jamie like they might be family but they're not your people and you gotta go find your people and I didn't want tuh believe her I didn't want I literally just said you know thanks but no thanks essentially and I'm gonna try my best tuh turn this family into mine because I want this connection and I want this and I wish I could have saved myself all those years by just listening tuh her and you know finding my own people who, who do love and support me for who I am who I don't have tuh like I can just don't have tuh walk on eggshells I don't have tuh try tuh be anybody else I can just be myself and they'll see like the good in that and they'll like it you know and, and not everyone's for everyone and that's okay and I just try tuh remind myself that but anyways um yeah you've always stood by my side so thank you I see you I'll always be by your side I just like sometimes doubt like if like you know like, like, like what have I done like am I a bad person like did I like what have I done this has nothing
DOUG NOTES THAT THEY'D FIND PEOPLE "DOWN HERE" IN FLORIDA, AND THAT THEY BOTH KNEW IT WOULD NOT HAPPEN OVERNIGHT, THAT REALLY MEANINGFUL BONDS TAKE TIME, BUT THEY ARE IN THE BEST POSSIBLE POSITION TO BUILD A COMMUNITY AND MAKE STRONG FRIENDS THEY CONSIDER TO BE FAMILY, AMAZING PEOPLE, AND THERE ARE KIDS TOO, AND THEY CAN WATCH EVERYONE GROW UP TOGETHER … AND HE THINKS, "That's kind of the point of, of moving tuh Florida find community find our people and also find out you know who would be there with us and for us and …"
JAMIE BLASTS BACK: It has nothing tuh do with you or who you are well the truth is, is obviously it does because these people don't enjoy being around me so then therefore they don't enjoy remembering our kids and or me whatever I guess I think I'm just really hormonal and emotional but I guess I just feel incredibly rejected and like I've done something wrong but I also know at the same exact breath that this has been happening for years and years and years where I've really
DOUG NOTES JAMIE HAS "TRIED SO HARD" AND THAT IT'S NOTHING THAT SHE DID.
JAMIE BLATHERS BACK THAT IT'S NOT REALLY THAT THEY'VE DONE ANYTHING WRONG, BUT … we just don't jive and I guess you know we have different we're different people and we can't force it yeah and so there's very little control that we have over it other than us being us yeah and so but you know but I guess this is like the healing part that everyone talks about with boundaries that's so painful like it's so painful because when you want something so bad and like I think it's like wired in me because it's family and like I really want tuh support family and love family and be there for them and but then it's like but it's just not there in return and you could just spend your whole life searching for it and or you could kind of put up a boundary and, and stop allowing that tuh continue tuh hurt you and find people who are genuinely happy tuh be around you and so needless tuh say for those of you listening if - if you're in this boat with someone whether it's parents siblings aunts uncles cousins I don't know or even long-time friends who you think are quote-unquote friends but you know things change or who knows I mean it's so darn hurtful but I really believe at the end of the day that I mean I was I spent years and years and years trying my darnedest and now I'm like if I, If I could give like an inkling of that effort tuh someone who gives an inkling of the effort back tuh me like the just the joy and happiness that could come from that or just like the stability and also like I did try changing myself tuh kind of be more like them tuh have more in common with them and it just I can tell you right now if you're trying tuh do that that's not gonna work either like it's hard unfortunately you just gotta be yourself in this world you gotta love with your whole heart and, and be selfless you know you can't expect people tuh just care about you if you don't care about them of course you gotta show up for people you gotta really like put yourself out there for them but if you consistently do that and you're not getting any of it in return you gotta change your path and it's the hardest thing in the world tuh do but you know tuh be very, very honest like going tuh bed with Doug last night after Son's birthday and like just everything that went down and whatnot I was just like and this is why we live in Florida this is why we moved here because this this served our core family more so than trying tuh fit a round peg into a square everyone else's schedule and everybody else's lives it's just you know and it's and I'm incredibly thankful tuh your sister and tuh your mom and your dad of course because they did reach out and that's just really, really kind like they called and they just show that they really care and that really means the whole wide world tuh me and like regardless of what they think of me like they love our kids and that's really all that
DOUG NOTES WHAT MATTERS IS-AND MAYBE THEY NEED TO BELIEVE IN SOME KIND OF "HIGHER PURPOSE," BUT HE DOESN'T CONSIDER IT ALL "WASTED TIME OR ENERGY," AND THAT IT MAYBE HAPPENED THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN AND FOR JAMIE TO GIVE …
AND SHE CUTS HIM OFF TO SAY THAT THIS MESSAGE CAN help others. I've really kind of like avoided being this vulnerable lately because I feel like there are some people who just really don't like me and it's been brought tuh my attention and just no matter what I do they really don't like me and I guess like everybody has quote-unquote haters but it hurts my heart a little bit and I don't know but, but the truth is, is like just like I said before what I learned in this the certain boundaries that I've talked about before is that you really can't change who you are in the hopes that people will start tuh approve of you because they're never like the people who just choose that they don't like you and they just choose tuh find your faults will always like they will always see your faults and they will always yeah there's no convincing them otherwise and that's and if you're listening tuh this like this is the truth for all of us is that when you're looking for the good in life you're gonna find the good and you can focus on that and try tuh get like more of that and garner more of that but if you're focused on the negative whether it's in life or with your spouse or with a friend or at the workplace you're gonna find that and so if so sometimes if you've you know if you see that you're consistently feeling like you have quote-unquote bad luck or that this person's being wrong tuh you or they're not caring about you will try tuh think about the good that they do and, and, and so truly like for me with these whole boundary things like I've tried just I tried tuh kind of I've already tried that with some of these family members that just don't seem tuh care and um and, and so that's and then that's when the hurt comes is you know when you realize oh yeah you're actually all right and you are onto something and for whatever reason their life isn't aligning with yours and it's and that's okay but it doesn't mean it's not gonna hurt a little bit for the person who like wants it tuh be there but that's when you go out and find someone who wants tuh align their life with you or maybe their life already aligns and they just and you can serve each other you can love each other you can be there for each other and whether it's blood related or not like that will serve you better in life and so that's kind of where I think Doug and I are right now um but also for, for you listening if, if you're just finding yourself in this situation too just try tuh make sure you're not just trying tuh find the fault in someone because you don't want tuh get caught in that rabbit hole and there are people out there who just want tuh find the negative and then there are people out there who cut that down like don't allow that tuh happen tuh yourself because you will be miserable your whole life hating on someone else and just constantly finding their faults and constantly complaining about them is never going tuh bring you true happiness it really isn't and so think about you know yourself and like what you can do differently and try tuh bring the positive and so yeah I haven't been as vulnerable lately because it's been hard tuh be very honest tuh just share like my heart and then people are just going tuh attack me for it you know I'm sure but um but my goal in sharing this if we end up sharing this is that it helps the one person out there or I'm sure several really who are in the same exact boat who are you know trying tuh keep a friend that they've had forever but that friend's just not there or trying tuh maintain a relationship with one of your parents or your siblings or it shouldn't be hard it shouldn't be and you shouldn't have tuh change who you are and if you do then that's really just not the right person for you and, and you can talk tuh them about it of course and then if they're just combative, at the end of the day, I just say the best advice is find a therapist, and this book called Boundaries, and it's a little religious, and also a little kind of like, whoa, but I'm telling you, Chapter One, just give it – if you don’t' like it after that, don't even try, but like Chapter One, I was like, wow, I can see so much of myself in this, and I can see how could change, and I've got tuh promise you that it's been hurt along the way, but I have – we have, and our family has more positive days now than stressful, trying tuh like pull people in who don't really want tuh be there, trying tuh help them remember because they're gonna forget, like it's just – like yesterday was like the least stressful day ever, and we didn't have one person coming tuh our – or even Mother's Day, it was just us four, and you know, before I had kids, and I think – I saw someone else write this, but like before I had kids, I looked at the world as like everyone I encountered, and how can I be helpful tuh them, and that – like, but now it's like my world is my husband and my children. My world is within my four walls, and how do I love them and support them the best that I possible can, tuh help them become good – eventually like good husbands, a good wife, good mothers, good fathers, and good, good family members, and so …
DOUG IS SO PROUD OF HER AND THINKS SHE SHOULD ALSO BE PROUD OF HERSELF BECAUSE OF "HOW MUCH YOU HAVE GROWN FROM PEOPLE STARTING TO COMMENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA, AND YOU TRYING TO BRING THEM BACK OVER TO YOUR SIDE TO RECOGNIZING THE TOXICITY OF IT, AND SETTING BOUNDARIES." HE HAS TO TELL HER THAT IN THE PAST COUPLE OF YEARS, SHE HAS "SPREAD MORE POSITIVITY, IN MY MIND, THAN ANYBODY, FOCUSING ON BEING THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL," AND A MESSAGE SHE IS PASSING ONTO THE KIDS WHO ARE REALLY STARTING tuh THINK ABOUT IT AND FOCUS ON IT, AND IT'S "DRIVEN BY YOU."
MORE RASPY WHINY TEARY VOICE: Oh, Gosh, Doug's that's the nicest comment that I could have ever received because I really want that for them … yeah, because I – because we could all fall into that where you see the negative and you just kind of focus on that, and I'm trying so hard not to, and tuh just – you know, pray more, and even meditate, and that has nothing tuh do with prayer, but like just rewire my brain tuh like the positive things and finding the positive and helping others, also because – honestly, and I want tuh raise my kid where they are not seeing the negative, they're seeing the positive in situations because life, regardless of who loves you, how much money you have, what home you live in, what car you drive, life is so much better when you're able tuh see the positive and you're able to, like lean into that more, and you're able tuh then attract people who are like that, and the Negative Nellies are just going tuh always be there talking their smack about you, and that's fine, but like, if you can find the positive, you can focus on that, and you're going tuh have such a happier life, and the Negative Nellies, unfortunately, like I still pray for them, I still hope for them, because it's sad – like they're not living a happy life. You can't be a hater tuh all these people and be happy. It's sad.
DOUG THINKS THEY ARE "living proof of it, because once we started tuh focus on happy, once we started focusing on being thankful and grateful, the people that we attracted are the people that we would want tuh be with … didn't happen overnight, but as soon as we started tuh rethink that, and really try tuh be positive and do positive things, and our prayers and with the kids and being thankful and finding good, and gratitude, you know, we attracted people into our lives that, you know, are going tuh be there – I mean, I feel these are now lifelong friends, and you know, all of that was attracted, and there has got tuh be something tuh that."
THE END, THEY MUST GO PICK UP THEIR DAUGHTER BUT ONLY AFTER THE FIVE-STAR REVIEW AND THEN "SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!"
DELUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSIONAL – THE BOTH OF THEM! And according to the AI program Jamie talks more than 90 percent of the time, and Dud, hardly ever.

So I've never done this before however i see a bunch of these stories on YouTube and decided to put my query to the people and see what sort of response i get.
Ill call my self T and my partner is S. we have known each other for about 4 years. and i suppose we have been official for about 2 years. our situation all started as a friend with benefits kind of situation and i was never really interested in a relationship or commitment.
I consider myself extremely logical and I don't deal with the majority of emotions, as most of the time I see them as obstacles that distract you from doing the things you have to do. However I don't want you all to think I am heartless I am not.
There is a lot more to this story then i will put here for now however i will add more if it is what people want for a better perspective.
I T am about 5'10" 160lbs quite athletic a regular gym goer and i train in BJJ (Jiu Jit Su). i am very driven to get out of the commercial work system, to achieve financial freedom. i don't make up excuses to not do things and anytime i know i am being lazy i berate myself, always hold myself accountable, and never use any circumstance as an excuse to not be productive in life. simple example if i am being lazy and i know it i say to myself "you know your being lazy and you need to do better" and that's it.
My partner S is about 5'6" 165lbs she is a animal lover and very compassionate person however that's about it she doesn't really have any specific hobbies and she seems to like the simple life she works in care and makes better then minimum wage.
Finally before we start ill put this here just because it might be helpful for some. when we first met S was as smoker and she used to regularly go to the pub and drink. for me these are major no no's for me as i have always hated smoking and to be honest i don't see the point in drinking I understand that's my opinion and I'm happy with it. however also because it was a FWB situation i didn't raise any concerns, however S also knew i didn't like smoking and so never did it around me.
so i guess i should start that after S said she would like to see where we could go in terms of a relationship. one of the first things i said was i wouldn't date someone who drinks or smokes just because they are things i disagree with and i don't want to be around them in my life. she said she would drop smoking but drinking was a bit of a different story there were still times she would come back late from the pub with friends and i could smell the alcohol coming off her. during these times i would become quite cold and distant as she knew i didn't like it but did it anyway and to be honest i just thought it was careless and disrespectful to what i had asked of her because of what she wanted with me.
After numerous arguments over time she finally decided she would no longer drink anymore which then led to my biggest issue with her and i had also spoken to her regarding this issue when i bought up no smoking and no drinking. And that was, her weight. in terms of relationships she is the only person i have been with who is overweight, and i don't mean obese just overweight by like 20-25lbs that's all. I had said to her that in order for this to become a relationship like she wanted i wanted her to loose weight, during these talks i also made sure to ask her if there was anything about me within my control that she would change to make us better or her happier with me like my body and/or personality, she did say she would like me to gain a little weight as i was quite skinny back then around 140lbs and i agreed. I should also mention the whole reason we initially starting seeing each other was because she said she wanted to loose some weight and she knew i was doing a home based workout program that she said she would like to get involved with.
so with all the above said the smoking stopped and the drinking stopped however when it came to loosing the weight it just didn't seem to be happening, within about 3 months of me going to the gym i had already gained a good amount of muscle and was getting stronger and healthier. i had taken S to the gym with me even though i knew we had different weight goals i always encouraged her to push her limits on the exercises she was doing especially cardio because i knew that was important for weight loss. however the thing i kept noticing was that she would give up the second it started to get difficult. which for me just said that the desire and determination wasn't there.
it wasn't long before she said she didn't like going to the gym with me as she said i was too intense and that it took the enjoyment away from going to the gym. i said to her that during the time of her journey she isn't there to enjoy it, she is there to achieve a goal, being stuck in a caloric deficit and working to push past limits to loose weight is going to be difficult and a struggle but that's where pushing through and being determined comes into play
Despite this she was adamant that she didn't want to go to the gym with me and that she would find another way to achieve the goal. Enter the PT so she decided to look into getting a PT to help her loose weight and that seemed to last about 2 months her PT gave her a workout program to stick to and a diet plan which she should follow. all of this seemed to perk her up a lot and she did seem more determined to work with it.
however despite all of the help she had received the results spoke for themselves which was basically nothing. this is where i am starting to get frustrated and i guess disappointed. when it comes to exercise and working out i have always understood that no matter your goal you have to push yourself past the limits of comfort to achieve good results.
the whole weight loss journey has been going on for over 18months now and i have said to her that i am not willing to wait forever, the way i see it is that it is an issue with effort and determination and nothing else. i have said that if she cannot achieve a noticeable change by the end of this year i will walk out.
i know that sounds horrible and i can see why people would think that of me, however she is constantly asking me to be more attentive and more affectionate however i have never found larger girls attractive and im just struggling to show her the affection she wants whilst she is overweight.
i would like to get other peoples thoughts on this so as i can get a broader perspective. please if people would like more information or a deeper dive into the overall story please let me know.

For some context:
I’m 18 years old and I’m gay. I have no attraction to women, especially my friends. My friend, let’s call her “Alex,” is bi but leans more towards women.
Alex lives in a dorm near my apartment. I live in the apartment with my brother and his girlfriend. We both have our own separate rooms. For the past 1-2 months, Alex has been coming over to stay/hang out with me, and we often have sleepovers together. I let her sleep on my bed with me because I see no problems with this. We both do not feel any romantic or sexual attraction toward each other at all. Alex stays in my room only, brings her own water and even her own food. All she does is stay in my room and hang out with me—playing video games, gossiping, and the normal bestie stuff. Having her over is fun since I’m always third-wheeling my brother and his girlfriend and hearing them argue all the time.
Today, my brother confronted me about having her stay over, saying it looks bad that a boy and a girl are sharing a bed together when they’re not dating, despite knowing full well that I’m gay. He said there’s always a possibility of me getting her pregnant, despite him having his girlfriend living with him without her parents even knowing. Isn’t that a bigger risk of getting HIS girlfriend pregnant than me, a gay man getting my best friend pregnant? He also said having us stay over together will ruin our future relationships. This really hurt me as he doesn’t believe in me and my sexuality. Would he say the same thing to me if that friend was a dude?
Alex thinks she’s at fault and that she got me in trouble despite her not doing anything wrong at all and just existing.
So what should I do? Do I listen to my brother and not have my best friend over in my own house anymore?

Everywhere I go in Addis or any other place, I get catcalled, and chased and hit on for being white. In bars and clubs I cannot meet any man without him trying to hit on me, or to kiss me, or touching me innapropriately. I even often say I'm married just to try and move on, but they don't even care if I'm married. It's not just on the street though, it's bars, university in Addis, it's professionals. If I give my phone number because I think people want to help, I get 40 calls and texts to go see them. Why is this a thing with white women? Because it doesn't happen with locals.

Sorry for the very long delay. Life has been hectic and I haven't always been in the mood to write and when I do, I want to make sure the analysis is op to snuff. So here's our continuation on card discussions -

Card of the Week: Cyclops

Card stats and text
Name: Cyclops

• Energy: 3
• Power: 4
• No ability

When powered up by High Evolutionary –
Name: (HE) Cyclops

• Energy: 3
• Power: 4
• Passive: Whenever you end a turn with at least 1 unspent Energy, apply -1 Power to a maximum of two of your opponent’s cards in this lane.

Card of the Week has analyzed 3 of the ’97 X-Men up to this point. So following the same trajectory, a long awaited update and analysis this time on the beloved field commander of the team – Cyclops. Cyclops is a bit different than the other cards we’ve previously looked at because he actually has two forms – an abilitless form and a powered up form that he only receives when High Evolutionary is added to your deck. This is a trait he shares with 6 other cards in the game, but Cyke is the first one we are taking a look at. How does Scott fare compare to his other colleagues?

Mechanically speaking, what are the card's distinctive strengths and weaknesses?

It probably isn’t even worth much of a discussion as you would think to talk about basic Cyclops. He’s a vanilla 3-4 and sets the base line of what you’d expect for a 3 cost card to perform. It is worth pointing out that of all the cost to expected power ratios, 3 costs have the worst at just x1.33 times versus every other cost. So on an energy efficiency basis, 3 cost par value cards are pretty terrible to begin with. Nowadays, it’s probably even more underpowered as there is a growing trend of “3-5 is the new 3-4”. There is definitely some element of truth to that given most of the new 3-5s, even if they are specific to one particular archetype (such as Black Swan), often times don’t have an ability that actively hurts you. So base Cyclops still being 3-4 makes him more or less unplayable as there is always a better option. Surprisingly, this wasn’t always the case. I definitely remember roughly a year ago when people were still using basic Cyclops in decks such as Patriot where he represented an ability to go tall. You definitely don’t see that in modern SNAP; partially due to power creep and partially due to new cards introducing new abilities that change the base line.
HE Cyke though is where we can actually have some discussion regarding strengths and weaknesses. Because instead of it being all bad, HE Cyke is actually largely good. In fact, of the 7 HE modified cards, Cyke is probably amongst the strongest, in the running for probably THE best HE card. Some basics first to get out of the way. To use this version of Cyclops, you must dedicate one of your card slots to adding High Evolutionary to your deck. Hence why this version is often denoted with HE in the front. Once you do so, Cyclops will change to this modified version (or “evolved”), where he gains a new, power passive ability.
HE Cyke’s strength is two-fold. The first is his theoretical stat line. Yes, his base is still the crummy 3-4. But assuming you can proc his ability every turn and you play him as soon as possible, HE Cyke is a 3-10. That’s obviously very good. Remember how Bishop last week required a ton of cards to be played AND needing to be played early to get there? Cyke does that relatively effortlessly. You just need to play him, then float at least 1 Energy a turn to benefit. His second strength is how he is able to synergize with a lot of cards that share similar archetypes. There is the HE toxic line of course, where you play a lot of negative debuffs to cheat out a cheap Abomination while nerfing the power of your opponent’s field, but likewise, Scott is excellent with cards that want to float since you can then make 1 point of energy do a ton of work. If you play Sunspot, HE Misty Knight and have HE Hulk, that 1 point of unspent energy adds an additional 4 power on top of Cyclops’ own -2 debuff. So in contrast to his abilitless form, HE Cyke actually feels like a team leader in that he is able to slot into and work with a lot of cards. Due to his continuing threat of slapping -1s once he is played, he’s also ends up working great in lane control decks as he actively discourages your opponent from competing with his theoretical power.
As far as weaknesses go, HE Cyclops has a few. The first being one that he shares with all HE cards, which is the need to slot HE into the deck. HE is what veteran card players refer to as “a garnet”. In simple terms, this means he is a card you include due to a combo or enabling some sort of play but feels terrible when you actually draw him. You never want to draw HE because HE himself is an ability-less 4-4. Yes, he doesn’t even hit par. His “ability” is powering up the other cards, so as such when draw, he does nothing. Losing one of your deck slots to put in a card that does zilch when you pick it up is obviously terrible. To mitigate, you might consider playing multiple HE powered cards so that he feels less egregious. And to his credit as noted, Cyclops works with a good number them, so it doesn’t always feel as oppressive as you’re making HE enhance multiple cards usually alongside Scott himself.
HE Cyke’s second weakness is that he is limited by his window and loses effectiveness if he is the only card that takes advantage of float. If you play Cyke late (like Turn 5), that diminishes the amount damage he is able to do. So in that regard, he wants to come on to the field ASAP. But worse yet, like other cards that operate with float, the later you draw and play him, the worse it feels to actively have float. Imagine a scenario, where the only card that can take advantage of float you end up playing is Scott. In this scenario, Cyke may “feel” like a 3-10. But if you are actively sacrificing 1 energy for him, is he really? It would probably be more accurate to say in this case, he is a 6-10. That doesn’t seem so impressive anymore now, does it? The reason why we usually discount this is because you often have many of the other play makers already on field (or in HE Hulk’s case, in hand). When your 1 point of float is adding to 4-5 different cards, the float doesn’t feel bad. But when your float is only powering up 1 card, then it feels grossly inefficient and Scott is unfortunately a victim of this. In short, Scott’s effectiveness also depends on your other float absorbers. You should not expect him to perform any last minute miracle turnarounds.

Where does the card fit in the metagame (past or present)? What archetypes should it work with?

Cyclops has had a pretty interesting run within the game’s meta. Before HE came around, his ability-less form was still used in certain decks (Patriot / Surfer) as a means to build tall in one lane. He was, at the time, pretty much the only 3 cost that could put out decent power with little set up. Even though there were other options within that field, power creep was lower a year ago so base Cyke still saw some use in selective cases.
HE’s release was great for Scott in general. Sure, it basically killed off his base form, but his evolved form is very strong and possibly the strongest HE card in the game. It turned him from a card that was going to die eventually to power creeping to a very often picked inclusion in certain achetypes – sometimes Best-in-Slot (BiS) for your deck if you’re playing something like She-naut or Toxic HE. You still see him today hanging out with other folks that make up those decks – Sunspot, Magik, HE Hulk – and he’s gained some new friends as he remains a staple on those lists. And while these decks are not currently being on top of the meta-lists, it’s always something to keep in mind as you play.

Which cards have noteworthy interactions with it?

Cyclops has a decent number of cards that he can combo off of, which has helped Scott stay relevant even in today’s landscape:

• High-Evolutionary: He’s useless in game but his inclusion is what gives Scott his evolved form. So if you plan on using that, you literally have no choice but to add him.
• HE Abomination / She-Hulk: Both cards are often cost-discounted with Cyclops. Float reduces She-Hulk’s cost, then Cyke’s -1 Power x 2 helps reduce HE Abom’s Cost by 2 if he hits 2 cards.
• Sunspot / HE Misty Knight: As with above, Cyke synergies with other cards that like float and Sunspot / HE Misty Knight do exactly that. Extra float gets converted straight to power for Sunspot while HE MK provides +1 power to a random card as long as you have float.
• Nebula: Often times when you place HE Cyke down in a lane, opponent’s will focus on the other lanes unless they have a good counter play since Cyke can be a big threat on his own. Adding Nebula to the same lane asks your opponent to pick their poison. Either give Nebula free boosts, or force them into the lane to be blasted.
• Storm: Not only does Storm lock the lane down, meaning any future cards played into her lane become Scott’s targets, but the added urgency she creates means an opponent will feel pressured to put something there or be forced to give up the lane for cheap.
• Jean Grey: Jean is an awkward card, but she combos well with HE Cyke. She holds an opponent’s play into the lane and he shoots them. I like how 2 of Cyke’s better partners are other classic ‘97ers.
• Silver Surfer: The OG but not really relevant anymore. Back then Surfer + Cyke was a way to build a lane tall in Surfer decks. But things have changed quite a bit so this combination has lost a lot of luster. Still if you are early in SNAP, it’s something that you can play around with.

What cards or strategies counter it? Are there other downsides to keep in mind?

Ability-less Cyclops doesn’t need much of a counter because he’s typically out-stated and power crept in today’s landscape. If your opponent plays ability-less Cyclops, you know he/she is probably early in their SNAP career and are probably running some old Patriot or Surfer variant. In which case, counters to those decks typically work.
HE Cyke is another story and the main meat of this section for obvious reasons. Unlike his base version, here, there’s an actual ability with actual threat behind it. So if you don’t check it, it typically means giving up the lane since Scott can just stack a bunch of -1 Power effects onto your board. The key to dealing with HE Cyke if you don’t carry the typical tech cards is to keep in mind his float efficiency. Decks with HE will typically want float and play other float synergistic cards such as Sunspot. If you can eliminate those cards from play or use, then that will weaken HE Cyke as well. Having 1 float power up HE Cyke, HE MK and Sunspot means your opponent gets a lot of mileage by being energy efficient. It is a completely different story if he’s giving up 1 energy just to add 2x -1 Power. For this reason, some more unusual counters include stuff like Elektra and Killmonger who can snipe out HE Cyke’s early supports.
Another tactic you can try is to forcing your opponent into not having any float at all. This is typically harder to do because there aren’t many ways to mess with your opponent’s costs. You might be tempted to play Mobius but most HE Cyclops’ decks won’t run stuff like Sera. And now that Zabu has basically been neutered, there’s even less reason for them to carry cost discounters. Iceman can work but is typically too random and you have no way of knowing what it hit. The Bounce variants that can replay him are going to be best for this since you can then slap a bunch of +1 cost modifiers, forcing the HE Cyke player into position where he is less likely to have float.
You can also choose to avoid playing in HE Cyke’s lane entirely. Indeed, HE Cyke’s ability only works if there are other cards in the lane. Specifically – he only gets full value if you have TWO cards on YOUR side of the lane. If you don’t have other cards there, then he’s fundamentally no different than his vanilla form. For this reason, the Goblins, White Widow and Viper can be good soft counters. Viper especially can be mean since you end up throwing back a debuffed card back to your opponent’s board. This isn’t always an option though due to the location effects but something to keep in mind.
If you do have his checks, then you’re in a good position. HE Cyke gets dumpstered pretty hard by certain tech cards – most notably Luke Cage. Now that Cage is back in his old form (albeit +1 cost, +2 power), he’s the premier choice for countering toxic debuff strategies. HE Cyke is of course no exception to this rule. Simply play him on a late turn and undo a bunch of your opponent’s work. If they are floating on 5 in preparation of playing a big boi like HE Hulk or Infinaut and She-Hulk, slapping Luke down undoes the previous 2 turns of work and puts you into position of nailing their big boi too. Otherwise, both Shadow King and Valkyrie deserve honorable mentions but are not as good as Luke. SK resets all the previous’ turns power debuffs, which can be big but you’ll still be at the mercy of the current round’s effect. Valkyrie is similar except she will set everything to 3 power. If you have a way to break parity with at least +3 power, then you’re in a good position to take the lane.
Being 3 cost means Cyke is also vulnerable to Magneto. But Magneto doesn’t really counter Scott because by the time old Magnetman hits the field, Cyke’s effect would have already proc’d twice. Sure, you can then move him to another location but by then the damage is done. There are times when Magneto can be the game winner (such as an opponent having a weak lane and another lane that has been Flooded and they are using Cyke + Storm to hold it), but like the locations, he’s definitely more situational.

What other cards may serve a similar role, for either replacement or redundancy?

From the HE family, HE Cyke’s closest comparison is his 4 cost companion HE Thing. Both cards slam -1 power effects to different cards in the lane. However, in Ben’s case, he’s an On Reveal and thus only triggers once and doesn’t scale with float. Otherwise, HE Misty Knight is also similar AND synergistic. In this case, you add +1 power for every additional point of float, just like how HE Cyke adds 2x -1 Power debuffs. This +1 is random though so care must be placed into deciding what you’re playing since the more cards there are, the extra float can hit cards you don’t really want.
Apart from the HE family of cards, HE Cyke shares similar abilities as Man-Thing. Both cards represent an establisher that aims to hold the lane by applying debuffs to other cards in the lane. Both cards aim to hit your opponent’s cards with a max of -8 power. The main difference here is that Man-Thing only hits cards that cost 1-3, whereas Scott can hit any card as long as you give him float. Man-Thing is also Ongoing so certain soft counters that work against Scott don’t work on Man-Thing.

Conclusion

Cyclops has come a long way. He went from being an ability-less, identity-less generic 3 cost to now a staple consideration in one of the game’s more competitive archetypes. Not bad for the field commander.
What are your best Cyclops plays?
What has been Cyclops’ best deck?
Did I miss anything in my assessment?
Let's discuss in the comments.

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hello my dears, Today I come here with a new story, as always and completely free for monetization, and if necessary some parts can be changed since English is not my first language XD, I just ask you to put the link in the comments so I can appreciate your wonderful work (and for the few who like my fallout series, don't worry, it's only on hiatus due to lack of creativity) shall we begin ?
*dripping sounds*
*voice in the distance* sweeeeetie, wake up my sugar bunny, God, how you loved it when I called you that - no you WILL love it when I call you that again *the voice starts to become clearer* oh? sweetie! you woke up! you don't know how worried I was, I know what a sleepyhead you are end-
*sounds of chains*
hey hey hey stop it, stop struggling,These chains are very very tight, and I don't want to see my sweetie marked by chains *speaker's voice becomes serious* I'm the only one who can mark you, I'm the only one who can touch you *speaker gets close* I'm the only one who can feel you, your soft skin, your scent, I'm the only one who can feel your soul
*deep breath*
yes yes yes YES!, this is the stuff, Do you know how difficult it was to steal your hoodies? I had to wait for you to go to physical education and then sneak into the men's locker room, ugh all this just to have something that is already mine
...
oh? sweetie you were always so stupid, how am I going to listen to you with that gag on ?
*sounds of chains*
stop it, stop it now I TOLD YOU TO STOP
*slap*
look at me *heavy breathing* LOOK AT ME, LOOK WHAT YOU MAKE ME DO SWEETIE, ha ha ha ha ha ha, YOU KNOW HOW TO AWAKEN THE WORST IN ME, DON'T YOU? SUGAR RABBIT
*speaker comes back to himself*
no no no no, don't cry please don't cry, you know I never meant you harm bunny boy,here let me just
*kiss*
there go, everything is fine, everything is fine, shiiiii, I'm a bunny, but none of this would be happening if you hadn't made the worst mistake of your life *litle slaps* *drawing knife* was the mistake of breaking up with me
*sounds of chains increases*
no no no, without struggling, you dug the grave, now you will be buried in it
*speaker runs the knife through the listener's clothes*
strange, you've never been one to wear long-sleeved shirts, hoodies yes, but never long-sleeved shirts,Did THE OTHER one say you looked good in these? ha I knew it, that's why you left me, for a slut
...
I ALREADY TOLD YOU, STOP CRYING, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW I FELT?
*speaker starts crying*
I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING, MY UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, MONEY, POPULARITY, AND ONE DAY OUT OF NOWHERE YOU JUST DECIDE TO BREAK UP WITH ME? THAT'S NOT FAIR
THAT'S NOT FAIR THAT'S NOT FAIR THAT'S NOT FAIR, YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME, THAT I WAS YOUR WORLD
*speaker continues to struggle*
I SAID STOP IT *fabric tearing sounds* NEXT TIME THE KNIFE WILL CUT YOur- *speaker takes the listener's arm* bunny,your arm, why does he have this bruise
*listner starts crying heavily*
bunny... what happened ?, bunny why are you crying? I won't hurt you here
*speaker throws the knife away*
Bunny, I'm going to take off your shirt, okay?
*fabric sounds*
my... God, *The speaker's eyes begin to water* Bunny, what happened to you? You're all covered in bruises, IS THAT A SCAR? ok I'm going to take off the gag ok? but please bunny don't scream
*speaker takes off the gag*
hey, please calm down, I can't understand anything, bunny breathe, just breathe, calmer? Now please my love, tell me what happened to you, don't tell me that... Bunny, did you do this to yourself?
...
no? ok that's a huge relief, I don't know what I would do if you even thought about that kind of thing, but bunny, so WHO did this to you, I swear I'll hang them with their own intestines ,here let me just, *sounds of chains* Here we go, free from these chains, you're safe I won't hurt you uff
*listner hugs the speaker crying*
It's okay bunny, just please tell me what happened
...
so that was the reason, they surround you, corner you and then they threaten you, all out of envy, *the speaker starts to cry*, and I thought you just wanted to play with my feelings, but of course not, a bunny like you would never be capable of harming anyone.
...
I know, but can you say it one more time?
...
one more time
...
That's right, you love ME, only me
bunny, this experience just showed how you can't live without me, understand
...
Nooooo you can't, do you remember that time you saw an injured bird and you tried to bring it into your house? And what happened ? You let him loose and he ended up hitting the glass door and hurting himself even more.
I won't make that mistake, you'll be safe with me, it'll take a while for the dust to settle, so you'll have to stay here for a while, but I won't let you get hurt anymore my bunny
...
Of course we can get snuggle, all to see you happy, and later you will tell me the name of everyone who did this to you.
...
I know, I must have scared you, your little heart felt like it was going to jump out of your chest But you have to understand that you are everything to me, and that if you ever think about leaving me, all of this is just the tip of the iceberg of what I am capable of doing.
...
I love you too my sugary fluffy bunny, now I'm going to get you some water, and your favorite snacks
...
Oh, that bottle of water? let's just say that it's not water ha ha ha, and that's all you need to know *sound of water moving inside a bottle* ...
what is it then ? come on, let's say it would be the "last resort" to make you fall on your knees for me
...
You know how the energy of a bunny like you is, this was just to make *clears throat* you looser with that energy, that's all
...
No I wouldn't drug you, again, I would just, you know, make you more suggestive of some actions ha ha ha, but let's leave that aside, I'll be right back ok my cutie.
love you, just make yourself comfortable sit wherever you want, and you can use the covers to keep warm, and a cold night outside
...
Yea it's already night, like I said you were out for a looooooooong time, my eepy bunny boy well out I go.