A Homily Prepared For Sunday May 19, 2024
The Collect
O God, who on this day taught the hearts of your faithful people by sending to them the light of your Holy Spirit: Grant us by the same Spirit to have a right judgment in all things, and evermore to rejoice in his holy comfort; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
The Gospel
John 7:37–39a
37 In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink.
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
39 (But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.)
Commentary on Today’s Gospel Selection;
In our Gospel selection for today, Pentecost Sunday, we look at an event which takes place on the last day of the Feast of Tabernacles, also known as Feast of Booths, and Sukkot. The event takes place in SeptembeOctober, and celebrates the fall harvest of grapes and olives. It lasts seven days with a holy convocation on the eighth day (Leviticus 23:36).
Jewish law specifies that, during the Feast of Tabernacles, Jewish people “You shall dwell in booths seven days. All who are native-born in Israel shall dwell in booths, that your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt” (Leviticus 23:42-43). It also characterizes this feast as a fall harvest festival (Exodus 23:16; Deuteronomy 16:13).
It was during this feast or celebrations that:
“Jesus stood and cried, saying,If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” (vs. 37-38) To understand the context of the situation in which Jesus stands and makes this pronouncement, you have to understand the daily rituals which took place during the festival.
During the first six days of the week long event, a priest would go to the Pool of Siloam and draw a pitcher full of water, then march in procession back to the temple with the people repeating from a verse found in Isaiah 12:3, “Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.”
Then upon returning to the temple the priest would pour out the water in an offering to God, commemorating the water that poured from the rock that sustained the ancient Israelites (Exodus 17:1-7; Numbers 20:1-13) as well as the rains that sustained Israel during the year just passed.
Everyday for six days, the people had been celebrating the water that had given their people physical sustenance; Jesus now tells them that he is capable of satisfying their spiritual thirst.
“as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.”(v. 38b) Just as we today think of the heart as being the center of emotions, (e.g. from the heart) in those times, they believed that the belly was the place where warm kindly benevolent feelings were generated. Jesus is saying that those who believe in him will receive these spiritual waters, waters of spiritual blessings, salvation.
When lost in the desert, the children of Israel thought the waters from God that materialized as flowing from a rock, were a blessing, a salvation in the physical sense for those who faced death from thirst (dehydration.) At the core of Jesus message to them that day, lies the fact that instead of worshiping an event that took place hundreds of years beforehand, a miracle that only provided physical sustenance for a brief time, they should be paying attention to his message which offers an eternal spiritual sustenance.
This verse brings to mind Jesus’ words to the Samaritan woman, “the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14).
Jeremiah 2:13 also contains a reference to spiritual water: “For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” Likewise we see in Jeremiah 17:13 “O LORD, the hope of Israel, all that forsake thee shall be ashamed, and they that depart from me shall be written in the earth, because they have forsaken the LORD, the fountain of living waters.” Perhaps Jesus recognized this disparity which could be seen in the religious rite in which the people celebrated his Father’s gift of water for physical thirst while remaining obvious to “the fountain of living waters” that God offered them.
In writing this Gospel, John the Evangelist, adds a note to the reader in verse 39; “But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.”
Here we find an explanation as to why these verses were selected for Pentecost Sunday, the day that the Holy spirit descended upon the Followers of Christ. Water and the Spirit are connected elsewhere in John — for example, when Jesus tells Nicodemus that “Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.” (3:5). In Jesus’ conversation with the Samaritan woman, living water is the symbol of the revelation of God in Christ which satisfies all spiritual thirst (4:10-15). “But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:14)
This living water that springs up into everlasting life, as promised by Jesus, is water that satisfies one’s spiritual thirst. A water that traditionally has been found through attendance and membership in the church, where one learns about the message and teachings of Christ, the essence of the water itself.
Unfortunately over the last decade, we have watched a great exodus from the church; in particular the old main-line churches. Those churches hemorrhaging membership most excessively, are those who in recent years have spent less time on—if not totally abandoning—the Gospel of Christ, while embracing a social gospel that may be based on good intentions, but none the less fails to address the people’s spiritual thirst.
Indeed, when questioned by pollsters attempting to gather information regarding this great exodus, a large number of people say that they identify as “spiritual but not religious.” Assuming that these people are indeed spiritual, then we can also assume that they are not finding in these churches, the water and spirit, with which to satisfy their thirst.
Ironically, we find the Hebrew people in chapter 7 attending a great celebration, one in which the observances commemorate important events in their history as a people chosen by God. Annual celebrations that for them, were certainly fun and wondrous to participate in, but yet—as Jesus noted by his crying out—they were failing to receive the spiritual water of God and instead they were focusing on recreating an event of centuries past. I say this is ironic, in that today we find the churches focusing, not on recreating events of the past as a commemoration of the importance of the event, but rather on progressive social ideologies that often conflict with the word of God itself. A so called social gospel that often drowns out the message of the Gospel of Christ.
Instead of uniting together as brothers and sisters in Christ seeking the water and spirit that Jesus spoke of, our churches are inculcating, not a gospel of the spirit that unites us in the name of Christ, but rather an ideology that divides us along social constructs and identities.
People who readily identify—when asked—as spiritual, seem to have an innate thirst for authentic spirituality, and apparently are not finding a cure for that thirst in these churches that are no longer churches of Christ, but which are now, for all pratical purposes, churches of progressive ideology.
But yet, if you really seek through the news media diligently, you will see signs that the Holy Spirit is descending again, in some ways, just as it did during that event we commemorate today.
The principalities of this world work to suppress the news of the spirit moving, but yet reports are emerging of young people filling the pews at revivals, mass baptisms, even the conversion of formerly reprobate celebrities who have now found Christ and are trying to turn around their life, to be as born again. We also are witnessing an increasing number of celebrities who are speaking out, unapologetically affirming their Christian beliefs and advocating for traditional family values and lifestyles. The Holy Spirit has touched the hearts of these individuals, compelling them to ignore their fears of persecution or their aversion to being called out as not being politically or socially correct.
As we observe the day that the Holy Spirit descended upon those in that room, let us be cognizant of the fact that there are many people in this world today, who are hungry for authentic Christianity. Those who thirst for authentic water and spirit that satiates the spiritual thirst. Those who can be characterized as being the least of these.
The “least of these” is a phrase that originates from Matthew 25:31–46, a passage often used in these modern times, to guilt Christians, causing them to embrace this false social gospel that is emptying the churches. Christians are not leaving because they do not want to help others, but due to the fact that they instinctively know that this passage, and others, are used out of context in an effort to guilt them into accepting what they know in their heart is wrong.
Matthew wrote this at a time, in which most likely the least of these, the needy, those imprisoned and persecuted, those that Christ called his bothers, most likely were his brothers and sisters, as it was a time in which Christians were discriminated against and tortured for their beliefs. Matthew was preaching to a congregation that knew all too well what the conditions Jesus spoke of were like.
While we are always to help the financially impoverished, a careful reading of Matthew 25:31–46 and its historical context demonstrates the need to give aid to the spiritually impoverished as well. When we look at how this passage was taught prior to the emergence of the social gospel a century past. We find a rebuke of the minsters who teach such false doctrines in these words of Jesus: “For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me ”
There are yet those who are spiritually hungry, spiritually thirsty, naked in spirit, they are treated as strangers by the modern church because they hold traditional values dear. There are those who speak out against all sorts of abominations and now find themselves in prison, sick and isolated. But yet the churches of social gospel turn a blind eye to them.
The rest of us must keep the spiritually hungry and thirsty in our prayers, reach out to them and help them find the spirit that is once again moving today as it moved two millennia ago.
Benediction:
O God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the only Savior, the Prince of Peace: Give us grace seriously to lay to heart the great dangers we are in by our unhappy divisions; take away all hatred and prejudice, and whatever else may hinder us from godly union and concord; that, as there is but one Body and one Spirit, one hope of our calling, one Lord, one Faith, one Baptism, one God and Father of us all, so we may be all of one heart and of one soul, united in one holy bond of truth and peace, of faith and charity, and may with one mind and one mouth glorify you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

A Homily Prepared For Sunday May 19, 2024
The Collect
O God, who on this day taught the hearts of your faithful people by sending to them the light of your Holy Spirit: Grant us by the same Spirit to have a right judgment in all things, and evermore to rejoice in his holy comfort; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
The Gospel
John 7:37–39a
37 In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink.
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
39 (But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.)
Commentary on Today’s Gospel Selection;
In our Gospel selection for today, Pentecost Sunday, we look at an event which takes place on the last day of the Feast of Tabernacles, also known as Feast of Booths, and Sukkot. The event takes place in SeptembeOctober, and celebrates the fall harvest of grapes and olives. It lasts seven days with a holy convocation on the eighth day (Leviticus 23:36).
Jewish law specifies that, during the Feast of Tabernacles, Jewish people “You shall dwell in booths seven days. All who are native-born in Israel shall dwell in booths, that your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt” (Leviticus 23:42-43). It also characterizes this feast as a fall harvest festival (Exodus 23:16; Deuteronomy 16:13).
It was during this feast or celebrations that:
“Jesus stood and cried, saying,If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” (vs. 37-38) To understand the context of the situation in which Jesus stands and makes this pronouncement, you have to understand the daily rituals which took place during the festival.
During the first six days of the week long event, a priest would go to the Pool of Siloam and draw a pitcher full of water, then march in procession back to the temple with the people repeating from a verse found in Isaiah 12:3, “Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.”
Then upon returning to the temple the priest would pour out the water in an offering to God, commemorating the water that poured from the rock that sustained the ancient Israelites (Exodus 17:1-7; Numbers 20:1-13) as well as the rains that sustained Israel during the year just passed.
Everyday for six days, the people had been celebrating the water that had given their people physical sustenance; Jesus now tells them that he is capable of satisfying their spiritual thirst.
“as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.”(v. 38b) Just as we today think of the heart as being the center of emotions, (e.g. from the heart) in those times, they believed that the belly was the place where warm kindly benevolent feelings were generated. Jesus is saying that those who believe in him will receive these spiritual waters, waters of spiritual blessings, salvation.
When lost in the desert, the children of Israel thought the waters from God that materialized as flowing from a rock, were a blessing, a salvation in the physical sense for those who faced death from thirst (dehydration.) At the core of Jesus message to them that day, lies the fact that instead of worshiping an event that took place hundreds of years beforehand, a miracle that only provided physical sustenance for a brief time, they should be paying attention to his message which offers an eternal spiritual sustenance.
This verse brings to mind Jesus’ words to the Samaritan woman, “the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14).
Jeremiah 2:13 also contains a reference to spiritual water: “For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” Likewise we see in Jeremiah 17:13 “O LORD, the hope of Israel, all that forsake thee shall be ashamed, and they that depart from me shall be written in the earth, because they have forsaken the LORD, the fountain of living waters.” Perhaps Jesus recognized this disparity which could be seen in the religious rite in which the people celebrated his Father’s gift of water for physical thirst while remaining obvious to “the fountain of living waters” that God offered them.
In writing this Gospel, John the Evangelist, adds a note to the reader in verse 39; “But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.”
Here we find an explanation as to why these verses were selected for Pentecost Sunday, the day that the Holy spirit descended upon the Followers of Christ. Water and the Spirit are connected elsewhere in John — for example, when Jesus tells Nicodemus that “Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.” (3:5). In Jesus’ conversation with the Samaritan woman, living water is the symbol of the revelation of God in Christ which satisfies all spiritual thirst (4:10-15). “But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:14)
This living water that springs up into everlasting life, as promised by Jesus, is water that satisfies one’s spiritual thirst. A water that traditionally has been found through attendance and membership in the church, where one learns about the message and teachings of Christ, the essence of the water itself.
Unfortunately over the last decade, we have watched a great exodus from the church; in particular the old main-line churches. Those churches hemorrhaging membership most excessively, are those who in recent years have spent less time on—if not totally abandoning—the Gospel of Christ, while embracing a social gospel that may be based on good intentions, but none the less fails to address the people’s spiritual thirst.
Indeed, when questioned by pollsters attempting to gather information regarding this great exodus, a large number of people say that they identify as “spiritual but not religious.” Assuming that these people are indeed spiritual, then we can also assume that they are not finding in these churches, the water and spirit, with which to satisfy their thirst.
Ironically, we find the Hebrew people in chapter 7 attending a great celebration, one in which the observances commemorate important events in their history as a people chosen by God. Annual celebrations that for them, were certainly fun and wondrous to participate in, but yet—as Jesus noted by his crying out—they were failing to receive the spiritual water of God and instead they were focusing on recreating an event of centuries past. I say this is ironic, in that today we find the churches focusing, not on recreating events of the past as a commemoration of the importance of the event, but rather on progressive social ideologies that often conflict with the word of God itself. A so called social gospel that often drowns out the message of the Gospel of Christ.
Instead of uniting together as brothers and sisters in Christ seeking the water and spirit that Jesus spoke of, our churches are inculcating, not a gospel of the spirit that unites us in the name of Christ, but rather an ideology that divides us along social constructs and identities.
People who readily identify—when asked—as spiritual, seem to have an innate thirst for authentic spirituality, and apparently are not finding a cure for that thirst in these churches that are no longer churches of Christ, but which are now, for all pratical purposes, churches of progressive ideology.
But yet, if you really seek through the news media diligently, you will see signs that the Holy Spirit is descending again, in some ways, just as it did during that event we commemorate today.
The principalities of this world work to suppress the news of the spirit moving, but yet reports are emerging of young people filling the pews at revivals, mass baptisms, even the conversion of formerly reprobate celebrities who have now found Christ and are trying to turn around their life, to be as born again. We also are witnessing an increasing number of celebrities who are speaking out, unapologetically affirming their Christian beliefs and advocating for traditional family values and lifestyles. The Holy Spirit has touched the hearts of these individuals, compelling them to ignore their fears of persecution or their aversion to being called out as not being politically or socially correct.
As we observe the day that the Holy Spirit descended upon those in that room, let us be cognizant of the fact that there are many people in this world today, who are hungry for authentic Christianity. Those who thirst for authentic water and spirit that satiates the spiritual thirst. Those who can be characterized as being the least of these.
The “least of these” is a phrase that originates from Matthew 25:31–46, a passage often used in these modern times, to guilt Christians, causing them to embrace this false social gospel that is emptying the churches. Christians are not leaving because they do not want to help others, but due to the fact that they instinctively know that this passage, and others, are used out of context in an effort to guilt them into accepting what they know in their heart is wrong.
Matthew wrote this at a time, in which most likely the least of these, the needy, those imprisoned and persecuted, those that Christ called his bothers, most likely were his brothers and sisters, as it was a time in which Christians were discriminated against and tortured for their beliefs. Matthew was preaching to a congregation that knew all too well what the conditions Jesus spoke of were like.
While we are always to help the financially impoverished, a careful reading of Matthew 25:31–46 and its historical context demonstrates the need to give aid to the spiritually impoverished as well. When we look at how this passage was taught prior to the emergence of the social gospel a century past. We find a rebuke of the minsters who teach such false doctrines in these words of Jesus: “For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me ”
There are yet those who are spiritually hungry, spiritually thirsty, naked in spirit, they are treated as strangers by the modern church because they hold traditional values dear. There are those who speak out against all sorts of abominations and now find themselves in prison, sick and isolated. But yet the churches of social gospel turn a blind eye to them.
The rest of us must keep the spiritually hungry and thirsty in our prayers, reach out to them and help them find the spirit that is once again moving today as it moved two millennia ago.
Benediction:
O God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the only Savior, the Prince of Peace: Give us grace seriously to lay to heart the great dangers we are in by our unhappy divisions; take away all hatred and prejudice, and whatever else may hinder us from godly union and concord; that, as there is but one Body and one Spirit, one hope of our calling, one Lord, one Faith, one Baptism, one God and Father of us all, so we may be all of one heart and of one soul, united in one holy bond of truth and peace, of faith and charity, and may with one mind and one mouth glorify you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

A Homily Prepared For Sunday May 19, 2024
The Collect
O God, who on this day taught the hearts of your faithful people by sending to them the light of your Holy Spirit: Grant us by the same Spirit to have a right judgment in all things, and evermore to rejoice in his holy comfort; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
The Gospel
John 7:37–39a
37 In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink.
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
39 (But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.)
Commentary on Today’s Gospel Selection;
In our Gospel selection for today, Pentecost Sunday, we look at an event which takes place on the last day of the Feast of Tabernacles, also known as Feast of Booths, and Sukkot. The event takes place in SeptembeOctober, and celebrates the fall harvest of grapes and olives. It lasts seven days with a holy convocation on the eighth day (Leviticus 23:36).
Jewish law specifies that, during the Feast of Tabernacles, Jewish people “You shall dwell in booths seven days. All who are native-born in Israel shall dwell in booths, that your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt” (Leviticus 23:42-43). It also characterizes this feast as a fall harvest festival (Exodus 23:16; Deuteronomy 16:13).
It was during this feast or celebrations that:
“Jesus stood and cried, saying,If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” (vs. 37-38) To understand the context of the situation in which Jesus stands and makes this pronouncement, you have to understand the daily rituals which took place during the festival.
During the first six days of the week long event, a priest would go to the Pool of Siloam and draw a pitcher full of water, then march in procession back to the temple with the people repeating from a verse found in Isaiah 12:3, “Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.”
Then upon returning to the temple the priest would pour out the water in an offering to God, commemorating the water that poured from the rock that sustained the ancient Israelites (Exodus 17:1-7; Numbers 20:1-13) as well as the rains that sustained Israel during the year just passed.
Everyday for six days, the people had been celebrating the water that had given their people physical sustenance; Jesus now tells them that he is capable of satisfying their spiritual thirst.
“as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.”(v. 38b) Just as we today think of the heart as being the center of emotions, (e.g. from the heart) in those times, they believed that the belly was the place where warm kindly benevolent feelings were generated. Jesus is saying that those who believe in him will receive these spiritual waters, waters of spiritual blessings, salvation.
When lost in the desert, the children of Israel thought the waters from God that materialized as flowing from a rock, were a blessing, a salvation in the physical sense for those who faced death from thirst (dehydration.) At the core of Jesus message to them that day, lies the fact that instead of worshiping an event that took place hundreds of years beforehand, a miracle that only provided physical sustenance for a brief time, they should be paying attention to his message which offers an eternal spiritual sustenance.
This verse brings to mind Jesus’ words to the Samaritan woman, “the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14).
Jeremiah 2:13 also contains a reference to spiritual water: “For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” Likewise we see in Jeremiah 17:13 “O LORD, the hope of Israel, all that forsake thee shall be ashamed, and they that depart from me shall be written in the earth, because they have forsaken the LORD, the fountain of living waters.” Perhaps Jesus recognized this disparity which could be seen in the religious rite in which the people celebrated his Father’s gift of water for physical thirst while remaining obvious to “the fountain of living waters” that God offered them.
In writing this Gospel, John the Evangelist, adds a note to the reader in verse 39; “But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.”
Here we find an explanation as to why these verses were selected for Pentecost Sunday, the day that the Holy spirit descended upon the Followers of Christ. Water and the Spirit are connected elsewhere in John — for example, when Jesus tells Nicodemus that “Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.” (3:5). In Jesus’ conversation with the Samaritan woman, living water is the symbol of the revelation of God in Christ which satisfies all spiritual thirst (4:10-15). “But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:14)
This living water that springs up into everlasting life, as promised by Jesus, is water that satisfies one’s spiritual thirst. A water that traditionally has been found through attendance and membership in the church, where one learns about the message and teachings of Christ, the essence of the water itself.
Unfortunately over the last decade, we have watched a great exodus from the church; in particular the old main-line churches. Those churches hemorrhaging membership most excessively, are those who in recent years have spent less time on—if not totally abandoning—the Gospel of Christ, while embracing a social gospel that may be based on good intentions, but none the less fails to address the people’s spiritual thirst.
Indeed, when questioned by pollsters attempting to gather information regarding this great exodus, a large number of people say that they identify as “spiritual but not religious.” Assuming that these people are indeed spiritual, then we can also assume that they are not finding in these churches, the water and spirit, with which to satisfy their thirst.
Ironically, we find the Hebrew people in chapter 7 attending a great celebration, one in which the observances commemorate important events in their history as a people chosen by God. Annual celebrations that for them, were certainly fun and wondrous to participate in, but yet—as Jesus noted by his crying out—they were failing to receive the spiritual water of God and instead they were focusing on recreating an event of centuries past. I say this is ironic, in that today we find the churches focusing, not on recreating events of the past as a commemoration of the importance of the event, but rather on progressive social ideologies that often conflict with the word of God itself. A so called social gospel that often drowns out the message of the Gospel of Christ.
Instead of uniting together as brothers and sisters in Christ seeking the water and spirit that Jesus spoke of, our churches are inculcating, not a gospel of the spirit that unites us in the name of Christ, but rather an ideology that divides us along social constructs and identities.
People who readily identify—when asked—as spiritual, seem to have an innate thirst for authentic spirituality, and apparently are not finding a cure for that thirst in these churches that are no longer churches of Christ, but which are now, for all pratical purposes, churches of progressive ideology.
But yet, if you really seek through the news media diligently, you will see signs that the Holy Spirit is descending again, in some ways, just as it did during that event we commemorate today.
The principalities of this world work to suppress the news of the spirit moving, but yet reports are emerging of young people filling the pews at revivals, mass baptisms, even the conversion of formerly reprobate celebrities who have now found Christ and are trying to turn around their life, to be as born again. We also are witnessing an increasing number of celebrities who are speaking out, unapologetically affirming their Christian beliefs and advocating for traditional family values and lifestyles. The Holy Spirit has touched the hearts of these individuals, compelling them to ignore their fears of persecution or their aversion to being called out as not being politically or socially correct.
As we observe the day that the Holy Spirit descended upon those in that room, let us be cognizant of the fact that there are many people in this world today, who are hungry for authentic Christianity. Those who thirst for authentic water and spirit that satiates the spiritual thirst. Those who can be characterized as being the least of these.
The “least of these” is a phrase that originates from Matthew 25:31–46, a passage often used in these modern times, to guilt Christians, causing them to embrace this false social gospel that is emptying the churches. Christians are not leaving because they do not want to help others, but due to the fact that they instinctively know that this passage, and others, are used out of context in an effort to guilt them into accepting what they know in their heart is wrong.
Matthew wrote this at a time, in which most likely the least of these, the needy, those imprisoned and persecuted, those that Christ called his bothers, most likely were his brothers and sisters, as it was a time in which Christians were discriminated against and tortured for their beliefs. Matthew was preaching to a congregation that knew all too well what the conditions Jesus spoke of were like.
While we are always to help the financially impoverished, a careful reading of Matthew 25:31–46 and its historical context demonstrates the need to give aid to the spiritually impoverished as well. When we look at how this passage was taught prior to the emergence of the social gospel a century past. We find a rebuke of the minsters who teach such false doctrines in these words of Jesus: “For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me ”
There are yet those who are spiritually hungry, spiritually thirsty, naked in spirit, they are treated as strangers by the modern church because they hold traditional values dear. There are those who speak out against all sorts of abominations and now find themselves in prison, sick and isolated. But yet the churches of social gospel turn a blind eye to them.
The rest of us must keep the spiritually hungry and thirsty in our prayers, reach out to them and help them find the spirit that is once again moving today as it moved two millennia ago.
Benediction:
O God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the only Savior, the Prince of Peace: Give us grace seriously to lay to heart the great dangers we are in by our unhappy divisions; take away all hatred and prejudice, and whatever else may hinder us from godly union and concord; that, as there is but one Body and one Spirit, one hope of our calling, one Lord, one Faith, one Baptism, one God and Father of us all, so we may be all of one heart and of one soul, united in one holy bond of truth and peace, of faith and charity, and may with one mind and one mouth glorify you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

A Homily Prepared For Sunday May 19, 2024
The Collect
O God, who on this day taught the hearts of your faithful people by sending to them the light of your Holy Spirit: Grant us by the same Spirit to have a right judgment in all things, and evermore to rejoice in his holy comfort; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
The Gospel
John 7:37–39a
37 In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink.
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
39 (But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.)
Commentary on Today’s Gospel Selection;
In our Gospel selection for today, Pentecost Sunday, we look at an event which takes place on the last day of the Feast of Tabernacles, also known as Feast of Booths, and Sukkot. The event takes place in SeptembeOctober, and celebrates the fall harvest of grapes and olives. It lasts seven days with a holy convocation on the eighth day (Leviticus 23:36).
Jewish law specifies that, during the Feast of Tabernacles, Jewish people “You shall dwell in booths seven days. All who are native-born in Israel shall dwell in booths, that your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt” (Leviticus 23:42-43). It also characterizes this feast as a fall harvest festival (Exodus 23:16; Deuteronomy 16:13).
It was during this feast or celebrations that:
“Jesus stood and cried, saying,If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” (vs. 37-38) To understand the context of the situation in which Jesus stands and makes this pronouncement, you have to understand the daily rituals which took place during the festival.
During the first six days of the week long event, a priest would go to the Pool of Siloam and draw a pitcher full of water, then march in procession back to the temple with the people repeating from a verse found in Isaiah 12:3, “Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.”
Then upon returning to the temple the priest would pour out the water in an offering to God, commemorating the water that poured from the rock that sustained the ancient Israelites (Exodus 17:1-7; Numbers 20:1-13) as well as the rains that sustained Israel during the year just passed.
Everyday for six days, the people had been celebrating the water that had given their people physical sustenance; Jesus now tells them that he is capable of satisfying their spiritual thirst.
“as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.”(v. 38b) Just as we today think of the heart as being the center of emotions, (e.g. from the heart) in those times, they believed that the belly was the place where warm kindly benevolent feelings were generated. Jesus is saying that those who believe in him will receive these spiritual waters, waters of spiritual blessings, salvation.
When lost in the desert, the children of Israel thought the waters from God that materialized as flowing from a rock, were a blessing, a salvation in the physical sense for those who faced death from thirst (dehydration.) At the core of Jesus message to them that day, lies the fact that instead of worshiping an event that took place hundreds of years beforehand, a miracle that only provided physical sustenance for a brief time, they should be paying attention to his message which offers an eternal spiritual sustenance.
This verse brings to mind Jesus’ words to the Samaritan woman, “the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14).
Jeremiah 2:13 also contains a reference to spiritual water: “For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” Likewise we see in Jeremiah 17:13 “O LORD, the hope of Israel, all that forsake thee shall be ashamed, and they that depart from me shall be written in the earth, because they have forsaken the LORD, the fountain of living waters.” Perhaps Jesus recognized this disparity which could be seen in the religious rite in which the people celebrated his Father’s gift of water for physical thirst while remaining obvious to “the fountain of living waters” that God offered them.
In writing this Gospel, John the Evangelist, adds a note to the reader in verse 39; “But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.”
Here we find an explanation as to why these verses were selected for Pentecost Sunday, the day that the Holy spirit descended upon the Followers of Christ. Water and the Spirit are connected elsewhere in John — for example, when Jesus tells Nicodemus that “Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.” (3:5). In Jesus’ conversation with the Samaritan woman, living water is the symbol of the revelation of God in Christ which satisfies all spiritual thirst (4:10-15). “But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:14)
This living water that springs up into everlasting life, as promised by Jesus, is water that satisfies one’s spiritual thirst. A water that traditionally has been found through attendance and membership in the church, where one learns about the message and teachings of Christ, the essence of the water itself.
Unfortunately over the last decade, we have watched a great exodus from the church; in particular the old main-line churches. Those churches hemorrhaging membership most excessively, are those who in recent years have spent less time on—if not totally abandoning—the Gospel of Christ, while embracing a social gospel that may be based on good intentions, but none the less fails to address the people’s spiritual thirst.
Indeed, when questioned by pollsters attempting to gather information regarding this great exodus, a large number of people say that they identify as “spiritual but not religious.” Assuming that these people are indeed spiritual, then we can also assume that they are not finding in these churches, the water and spirit, with which to satisfy their thirst.
Ironically, we find the Hebrew people in chapter 7 attending a great celebration, one in which the observances commemorate important events in their history as a people chosen by God. Annual celebrations that for them, were certainly fun and wondrous to participate in, but yet—as Jesus noted by his crying out—they were failing to receive the spiritual water of God and instead they were focusing on recreating an event of centuries past. I say this is ironic, in that today we find the churches focusing, not on recreating events of the past as a commemoration of the importance of the event, but rather on progressive social ideologies that often conflict with the word of God itself. A so called social gospel that often drowns out the message of the Gospel of Christ.
Instead of uniting together as brothers and sisters in Christ seeking the water and spirit that Jesus spoke of, our churches are inculcating, not a gospel of the spirit that unites us in the name of Christ, but rather an ideology that divides us along social constructs and identities.
People who readily identify—when asked—as spiritual, seem to have an innate thirst for authentic spirituality, and apparently are not finding a cure for that thirst in these churches that are no longer churches of Christ, but which are now, for all pratical purposes, churches of progressive ideology.
But yet, if you really seek through the news media diligently, you will see signs that the Holy Spirit is descending again, in some ways, just as it did during that event we commemorate today.
The principalities of this world work to suppress the news of the spirit moving, but yet reports are emerging of young people filling the pews at revivals, mass baptisms, even the conversion of formerly reprobate celebrities who have now found Christ and are trying to turn around their life, to be as born again. We also are witnessing an increasing number of celebrities who are speaking out, unapologetically affirming their Christian beliefs and advocating for traditional family values and lifestyles. The Holy Spirit has touched the hearts of these individuals, compelling them to ignore their fears of persecution or their aversion to being called out as not being politically or socially correct.
As we observe the day that the Holy Spirit descended upon those in that room, let us be cognizant of the fact that there are many people in this world today, who are hungry for authentic Christianity. Those who thirst for authentic water and spirit that satiates the spiritual thirst. Those who can be characterized as being the least of these.
The “least of these” is a phrase that originates from Matthew 25:31–46, a passage often used in these modern times, to guilt Christians, causing them to embrace this false social gospel that is emptying the churches. Christians are not leaving because they do not want to help others, but due to the fact that they instinctively know that this passage, and others, are used out of context in an effort to guilt them into accepting what they know in their heart is wrong.
Matthew wrote this at a time, in which most likely the least of these, the needy, those imprisoned and persecuted, those that Christ called his bothers, most likely were his brothers and sisters, as it was a time in which Christians were discriminated against and tortured for their beliefs. Matthew was preaching to a congregation that knew all too well what the conditions Jesus spoke of were like.
While we are always to help the financially impoverished, a careful reading of Matthew 25:31–46 and its historical context demonstrates the need to give aid to the spiritually impoverished as well. When we look at how this passage was taught prior to the emergence of the social gospel a century past. We find a rebuke of the minsters who teach such false doctrines in these words of Jesus: “For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me ”
There are yet those who are spiritually hungry, spiritually thirsty, naked in spirit, they are treated as strangers by the modern church because they hold traditional values dear. There are those who speak out against all sorts of abominations and now find themselves in prison, sick and isolated. But yet the churches of social gospel turn a blind eye to them.
The rest of us must keep the spiritually hungry and thirsty in our prayers, reach out to them and help them find the spirit that is once again moving today as it moved two millennia ago.
Benediction:
O God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the only Savior, the Prince of Peace: Give us grace seriously to lay to heart the great dangers we are in by our unhappy divisions; take away all hatred and prejudice, and whatever else may hinder us from godly union and concord; that, as there is but one Body and one Spirit, one hope of our calling, one Lord, one Faith, one Baptism, one God and Father of us all, so we may be all of one heart and of one soul, united in one holy bond of truth and peace, of faith and charity, and may with one mind and one mouth glorify you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

A Homily Prepared For Sunday May 19, 2024
The Collect
O God, who on this day taught the hearts of your faithful people by sending to them the light of your Holy Spirit: Grant us by the same Spirit to have a right judgment in all things, and evermore to rejoice in his holy comfort; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
The Gospel
John 7:37–39a
37 In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink.
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
39 (But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.)
Commentary on Today’s Gospel Selection;
In our Gospel selection for today, Pentecost Sunday, we look at an event which takes place on the last day of the Feast of Tabernacles, also known as Feast of Booths, and Sukkot. The event takes place in SeptembeOctober, and celebrates the fall harvest of grapes and olives. It lasts seven days with a holy convocation on the eighth day (Leviticus 23:36).
Jewish law specifies that, during the Feast of Tabernacles, Jewish people “You shall dwell in booths seven days. All who are native-born in Israel shall dwell in booths, that your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt” (Leviticus 23:42-43). It also characterizes this feast as a fall harvest festival (Exodus 23:16; Deuteronomy 16:13).
It was during this feast or celebrations that:
“Jesus stood and cried, saying,If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” (vs. 37-38) To understand the context of the situation in which Jesus stands and makes this pronouncement, you have to understand the daily rituals which took place during the festival.
During the first six days of the week long event, a priest would go to the Pool of Siloam and draw a pitcher full of water, then march in procession back to the temple with the people repeating from a verse found in Isaiah 12:3, “Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.”
Then upon returning to the temple the priest would pour out the water in an offering to God, commemorating the water that poured from the rock that sustained the ancient Israelites (Exodus 17:1-7; Numbers 20:1-13) as well as the rains that sustained Israel during the year just passed.
Everyday for six days, the people had been celebrating the water that had given their people physical sustenance; Jesus now tells them that he is capable of satisfying their spiritual thirst.
“as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.”(v. 38b) Just as we today think of the heart as being the center of emotions, (e.g. from the heart) in those times, they believed that the belly was the place where warm kindly benevolent feelings were generated. Jesus is saying that those who believe in him will receive these spiritual waters, waters of spiritual blessings, salvation.
When lost in the desert, the children of Israel thought the waters from God that materialized as flowing from a rock, were a blessing, a salvation in the physical sense for those who faced death from thirst (dehydration.) At the core of Jesus message to them that day, lies the fact that instead of worshiping an event that took place hundreds of years beforehand, a miracle that only provided physical sustenance for a brief time, they should be paying attention to his message which offers an eternal spiritual sustenance.
This verse brings to mind Jesus’ words to the Samaritan woman, “the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14).
Jeremiah 2:13 also contains a reference to spiritual water: “For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” Likewise we see in Jeremiah 17:13 “O LORD, the hope of Israel, all that forsake thee shall be ashamed, and they that depart from me shall be written in the earth, because they have forsaken the LORD, the fountain of living waters.” Perhaps Jesus recognized this disparity which could be seen in the religious rite in which the people celebrated his Father’s gift of water for physical thirst while remaining obvious to “the fountain of living waters” that God offered them.
In writing this Gospel, John the Evangelist, adds a note to the reader in verse 39; “But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.”
Here we find an explanation as to why these verses were selected for Pentecost Sunday, the day that the Holy spirit descended upon the Followers of Christ. Water and the Spirit are connected elsewhere in John — for example, when Jesus tells Nicodemus that “Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.” (3:5). In Jesus’ conversation with the Samaritan woman, living water is the symbol of the revelation of God in Christ which satisfies all spiritual thirst (4:10-15). “But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:14)
This living water that springs up into everlasting life, as promised by Jesus, is water that satisfies one’s spiritual thirst. A water that traditionally has been found through attendance and membership in the church, where one learns about the message and teachings of Christ, the essence of the water itself.
Unfortunately over the last decade, we have watched a great exodus from the church; in particular the old main-line churches. Those churches hemorrhaging membership most excessively, are those who in recent years have spent less time on—if not totally abandoning—the Gospel of Christ, while embracing a social gospel that may be based on good intentions, but none the less fails to address the people’s spiritual thirst.
Indeed, when questioned by pollsters attempting to gather information regarding this great exodus, a large number of people say that they identify as “spiritual but not religious.” Assuming that these people are indeed spiritual, then we can also assume that they are not finding in these churches, the water and spirit, with which to satisfy their thirst.
Ironically, we find the Hebrew people in chapter 7 attending a great celebration, one in which the observances commemorate important events in their history as a people chosen by God. Annual celebrations that for them, were certainly fun and wondrous to participate in, but yet—as Jesus noted by his crying out—they were failing to receive the spiritual water of God and instead they were focusing on recreating an event of centuries past. I say this is ironic, in that today we find the churches focusing, not on recreating events of the past as a commemoration of the importance of the event, but rather on progressive social ideologies that often conflict with the word of God itself. A so called social gospel that often drowns out the message of the Gospel of Christ.
Instead of uniting together as brothers and sisters in Christ seeking the water and spirit that Jesus spoke of, our churches are inculcating, not a gospel of the spirit that unites us in the name of Christ, but rather an ideology that divides us along social constructs and identities.
People who readily identify—when asked—as spiritual, seem to have an innate thirst for authentic spirituality, and apparently are not finding a cure for that thirst in these churches that are no longer churches of Christ, but which are now, for all pratical purposes, churches of progressive ideology.
But yet, if you really seek through the news media diligently, you will see signs that the Holy Spirit is descending again, in some ways, just as it did during that event we commemorate today.
The principalities of this world work to suppress the news of the spirit moving, but yet reports are emerging of young people filling the pews at revivals, mass baptisms, even the conversion of formerly reprobate celebrities who have now found Christ and are trying to turn around their life, to be as born again. We also are witnessing an increasing number of celebrities who are speaking out, unapologetically affirming their Christian beliefs and advocating for traditional family values and lifestyles. The Holy Spirit has touched the hearts of these individuals, compelling them to ignore their fears of persecution or their aversion to being called out as not being politically or socially correct.
As we observe the day that the Holy Spirit descended upon those in that room, let us be cognizant of the fact that there are many people in this world today, who are hungry for authentic Christianity. Those who thirst for authentic water and spirit that satiates the spiritual thirst. Those who can be characterized as being the least of these.
The “least of these” is a phrase that originates from Matthew 25:31–46, a passage often used in these modern times, to guilt Christians, causing them to embrace this false social gospel that is emptying the churches. Christians are not leaving because they do not want to help others, but due to the fact that they instinctively know that this passage, and others, are used out of context in an effort to guilt them into accepting what they know in their heart is wrong.
Matthew wrote this at a time, in which most likely the least of these, the needy, those imprisoned and persecuted, those that Christ called his bothers, most likely were his brothers and sisters, as it was a time in which Christians were discriminated against and tortured for their beliefs. Matthew was preaching to a congregation that knew all too well what the conditions Jesus spoke of were like.
While we are always to help the financially impoverished, a careful reading of Matthew 25:31–46 and its historical context demonstrates the need to give aid to the spiritually impoverished as well. When we look at how this passage was taught prior to the emergence of the social gospel a century past. We find a rebuke of the minsters who teach such false doctrines in these words of Jesus: “For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me ”
There are yet those who are spiritually hungry, spiritually thirsty, naked in spirit, they are treated as strangers by the modern church because they hold traditional values dear. There are those who speak out against all sorts of abominations and now find themselves in prison, sick and isolated. But yet the churches of social gospel turn a blind eye to them.
The rest of us must keep the spiritually hungry and thirsty in our prayers, reach out to them and help them find the spirit that is once again moving today as it moved two millennia ago.
Benediction:
O God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the only Savior, the Prince of Peace: Give us grace seriously to lay to heart the great dangers we are in by our unhappy divisions; take away all hatred and prejudice, and whatever else may hinder us from godly union and concord; that, as there is but one Body and one Spirit, one hope of our calling, one Lord, one Faith, one Baptism, one God and Father of us all, so we may be all of one heart and of one soul, united in one holy bond of truth and peace, of faith and charity, and may with one mind and one mouth glorify you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

So I decided to commit to UT despite getting rejected from Mccombs. I keep telling myself the opportunities I would receive in moody ( the college I’m committed to rn) are far greater than what I would receive as an actual business student at local universities ( I live in the panhandle, so tech, Lubbock Christian, etc.) On top of that, I just really didn’t like the environment of the panhandle. Anyways, although I am going to be in moody for the fall, I still truly believe I have what it takes to be in Mccombs and will try my best to internally transfer. However, if I don’t end up getting in, I feel like corporate comm could still get me lots of jobs in tech or business. This is what I keep telling myself at least, but am I actually fucking up? Should I just have gone to a school that guarantees my major if I ultimately want to end up with a job surrounding business or tech? Also if you’re wondering about other schools like UTD or A&M, UTD gave me crumbs for financial aid and I didn’t realize the deadline to apply to A&M was the same as UT, so I missed it😭.

Exploration of an Innovative K-12 School Curriculum and Pedagogical Approaches
Before going over the curriculum we must first discuss how to best teach. All of the following methods outlined below are what would I would suggest be use to teach the students trying to use just one or even just two of these would not be enough and would compromise the students learning and education
Teaching Methods
Project-Based Learning (PBL): In PBL, students work on a project over an extended period, which could be a week or a month, to respond to a complex question, problem, or challenge. The projects are usually multi-disciplinary and require students to apply what they've learned in a practical manner. This allows them to see the immediate applicability of their learning.
Inquiry-Based Learning: This is a form of active learning that starts by posing questions, problems, or scenarios—rather than simply presenting established facts or portraying a smooth path to knowledge. Students are involved in the construction of their learning. They engage with the material, participate in the class, and collaborate with each other.
Gamification: Incorporating elements of game design in education can make learning fun and engaging. This can involve point systems, leaderboards, badges, or other game mechanics.
Experiential Learning: This method involves learning by doing and reflecting on the experience. It can include internships, study abroad programs, field trips, laboratory experiments, or any other hands-on learning experiences.
Flipped Classroom: In a flipped classroom, students review lecture materials at home and do their 'homework' in class, where they can ask for help as they practice new skills and apply new knowledge. This allows teachers to spend class time helping students apply what they've learned and coaching them as they work through challenges.
Cross-Disciplinary Projects: By integrating different disciplines into a single project, you can make the learning experience more holistic and interconnected, much like how the knowledge of different magical disciplines would combine in a fantasy setting.
Competency-Based Learning: In this educational model, students advance upon mastering a skill or a competency. This encourages active utilization of knowledge and immediate feedback, similar to how a magic student might advance only after successfully casting a particular spell.
Now that we have given a basic outline of the teaching styles we can go over the curriculum for K-12 the idea would be to Have an A/B day schedule and some classes would meet less frequently because they don't take much time to cover everything, all of this will be done in order to create well rounded students, people and citizens. They are not only creative in nature, but leaders in their own right as well as capable of doing whatever they desire and succeeding wildly
Core Curriculum Classes:
STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, Mathematics): must Ensure these subjects are covered both within the integrated curriculum (like coding in math, cooking in science, history in art, etc.) and as standalone classes to develop depth of knowledge.
Memory Techniques & Knowledge Management Techniques: Using an Integrated code based system with AI tools to help teacher track progress and provide more targeted assistance as well as help students with how to effectively organize and manage knowledge, covering basic note-taking, the PARA/CODE system. Using AI to provide semi interactive sessions that not only explain how memory works but also actively encourage the practice of using the note taking method & memory techniques
Project-Based Learning: Encourage practical application of knowledge through project-based learning. Gamification & Experiential Learning: Use these techniques to make learning more engaging and fun.
Flipped Classroom & Inquiry-Based Learning: Encourage independent learning and critical thinking through these teaching methods.
Elementary School: Coding & Digital Literacy: Introduce basic coding principles using visual coding platforms. Begin teaching about online safety and basic cybersecurity. Financial Literacy: Teach basic concepts like the value of money, saving, and spending. Potential to introduce the use of real currency and creating student based economy Community Service: Arrange class-based community projects and encourage involvement in community service outside of school. Gardening & Cooking: Teach students about plants, nutrition, and basic cooking skills through a school garden. Literacy & Reading: Develop a reading program that exposes students to a variety of genres. Writing can begin with simple sentences. History: Teach history from a holistic and critical perspective, exploring different cultures and perspectives. Basic Medicine & First Aid: Introduce simple health, hygiene, and basic first aid skills. Physical Education: Encourage a love for physical activity through a variety of engaging games. Emotional Regulation & Healthy Relationships with Technology: Incorporate social-emotional learning and healthy technology use. Leadership: Begin fostering leadership qualities through group activities and responsibility sharing. Self-Defense: Introduce basic safety rules and personal boundaries. Spanish: Introduce basic Spanish vocabulary and phrases, along with exposure to the culture of Spanish-speaking countries. Songs, games, and interactive activities can be used to make learning enjoyable.
Middle School: Coding, Digital Literacy & Practical Engineering: Continue coding education and introduce robotics and basic electronics. Financial Literacy: Start teaching about budgeting, banking, and simple concepts of earning. Potential to introduce the use of real currency and creating student based economy Community Service: Encourage students to plan and lead community service projects, either in groups or individually. Gardening & Cooking: Progress in gardening and cooking skills, introducing sustainability issues. Literacy, Reading, & Writing Skills: Increase complexity of reading and writing assignments. History: Provide more in-depth history education using primary sources and interpretations. Basic Medicine & First Aid: Offer a more detailed course on first aid and health. Physical Education: Introduce a range of physical activities, sports, and body awareness topics. Emotional Regulation & Healthy Relationships with Technology: Develop emotional intelligence skills, mindfulness practices, and education about responsible technology use. Leadership: Teach various leadership styles and emphasize group projects requiring delegation and decision-making. Self-Defense: Continue with more practical self-defense techniques. Study of Government: Begin a foundational study of the local and national government. Teach students about the branches of government, their roles, and how laws are made. Spanish: Continue to build on vocabulary and grammar learned in elementary school. Introduce simple written exercises and encourage basic conversation in Spanish.
High School: Coding, Digital Literacy & Practical Engineering: Offer advanced coding and practical engineering classes, including topics like 3D modeling and advanced electronics.Teach more advanced cybersecurity concepts and ethics of digital communication Gardening & Cooking: As elective courses, delve into advanced topics like food science or agricultural technology. Literacy, Reading, & Writing Skills: Offer a variety of literature courses, creative writing classes, and research-based writing. History: Teach history as a dynamic and interpretive subject, encouraging critical thinking. Basic Medicine & First Aid: Include more advanced first aid, mental health awareness, and basic human anatomy and physiology. Physical Education: Offer a range of athletic options, and include education about exercise science and long-term health benefits. Emotional Regulation & Healthy Relationships with Technology: Provide resources for emotional regulation, advanced mindfulness techniques, and in-depth discussions about technology's role in society. Leadership: Delve deeper into conflict resolution, strategic planning, and ethical leadership, often through real-world applications. Financial Literacy: Start teaching about budgeting, banking, and simple concepts of earning. Potential to encourage student to start their own business or get a job and have students buy things from each other Self-Defense/Mixed Martial Arts: For interested students, offer elective classes in mixed martial arts, fostering physical and mental skills. Study of Government: Expand on knowledge from middle school and introduce international government systems. Discuss the concepts of democracy, socialism, and other forms of government. Involve students in mock debates and simulations, like Model United Nations or Mock Parliament. Study of Politics: Begin a course on political science, covering key political ideologies, parties, and political processes. Discuss current events and involve students in debates and discussions to encourage critical thinking. Creating Change: Introduce a course on social activism and creating change. This can involve studying historical movements for change, understanding how to effect change within a legal framework, learning about peaceful protest, and planning and implementing a small-scale change project within the school or community. Spanish: Continue to deepen knowledge of Spanish. Encourage advanced conversation and written exercises. Students could read Spanish literature or news and discuss in class, fostering language skills and cultural understanding.
This kind of curriculum would be nearly the best, being interdisciplinary, hands-on, and centered around the interests and needs of the students. It would aim to not only equip students with the knowledge and skills they need to succeed in the world, but also ignite their passion for learning and encourage them to continue learning throughout their lives.
But before we’re done one last thing must be covered. How to assess a student's growth because science shows that paper tests are not suited for the task. There are many innovative ways to assess student understanding and skills without relying solely on traditional exams. The methods that could be used include Assessment Methods
Portfolios: Students could compile portfolios of their work, which could include code they've written, projects they've completed, or essays they've written. A portfolio allows students to demonstrate their learning process, their progress over time, and their ability to apply what they've learned in different contexts.
Presentations: Students can demonstrate their understanding of a topic by presenting on it. This could involve presenting a project they've completed, explaining a concept to the class, or debating a topic with classmates.
Peer and Self-Assessment: Students can learn a lot from assessing each other's work or their own work. This can help them develop a better understanding of the assessment criteria and improve their ability to critically evaluate work.
Performance Assessment: In subjects like self-defense, physical education, cooking, or gardening, students could be assessed based on their performance. This could involve demonstrating a technique, completing a task, or participating in a game or competition.
Reflective Journals: Students could maintain journals where they reflect on what they've learned, how they've applied it, and what they still want to understand better. This can give teachers insight into a student's thought process and their understanding of the subject.
Project-Based Assessment: Students can be assessed on the projects they complete, whether individually or in groups. This allows students to demonstrate a range of skills, including knowledge of the subject, problem-solving, creativity, and teamwork.
Community Service Assessment: In addition to the other assessments, teachers can assess students' community service involvement, their planning and leadership skills, as well as their reflections on their experiences.
The emphasis of Knowledge Management Techniques and Memory Techniques in core classes as a standalone session every day would ideally give students a break from traditional instruction and allow them to process and manage their learnings. This can be in the form of group discussions, independent reflection time, or guided activities for planning and organizing their work.

I’m in a community college going for my Cyber Security degree. My grandma got sick and died in hospice, and that took a toll on my availability. My family is big and we needed bonding time. I was in a whole other state for half of the semester due to me going back and forth to Connecticut. Last semester, I ended up passing all my classes and ended the semester with a 2.5 GPA. This semester, I failed 3/4 of my classes. I’m on an academic hold because I have payments due, but I’ll be handling that next week. I’m afraid of academic probation and I can’t afford my financial aid to be risk because it’s not like I have a scholarship or anything. Everytng is a loan. Please help.
CORRECTION, I WAS ABLE TO MAKE THINGS WORK FOR ANOTHER CLASS. I NOW ONLY FAILED 2/4. Still bad but better

My cousin has been accepted in this master program self funded and he was dreaming to study there and we need to know if there is any funding organisation that can fully or partially fund him, or any financial aid for international students, he will study first year in RPTU in Germany and second year in Southampton University but he is required to pay the whole cost of program before starting first year.
If you have any suggestions because there was a regional funding scholarship but the application is closed before receiving the acceptance letter.
Please provide any information that can help by the way he is not EU citizen
Thanks you in advance. I posted this one before but there was no reach so i hope this time it will reach as much as people in this group.

We are not from Indiana. My son was supposed to attend our state flagship university but today he said we would like to go to Purdue. He never asks for anything so this means he really wants it. We make $150k a year before taxes and we will not qualify for any income based financial aid. We cannot afford attendance, even after the $16k merit scholarship the Purdue offers.
Are there generous merit based scholarships for out of state engineering students in addition to the general ones? The college website is very vague. My son has 1510 on the SAT and 34 in the ACT. He will have 6 AP exams by the time he applies and ranks 3 out of 500 students in his class (top 10 high school in the state). Has 3 extra curriculars but nothing fancy. Should he take the SAT or ACT again or enroll in more ECs to increase his chances of admission or scholarships?

Hi everyone. I’m an incoming transfer student from a technical college, and enrolled in the summer transfer early start program in hopes of getting access to resources/aid as soon as humanly possible. I am wondering if anyone has experience with something similar at UW, and could help ease some of my anxiety.
For some background, I was awarded the Pell Pathway financial aid package for the fall, but have not gotten any information regarding summer aid. I just finished my last semester, but until now I have been a stay at home mom while taking my classes online. We could not afford child care at my previous school due to living outside of the county my college was in. So we are trying to find a place for my daughter to be enrolled come the fall. But the biggest reason I am struggling right now is housing. We need to find a place, secure it, come up with a security deposit somehow, and notify our landlord of us not resigning, all by the end of May. And genuinely we have hardly even survived until this point, and this financial aid is going to literally be the thing I prayed for the past 28 years. I’m a first gen college student, have absolutely 0 support aside from my husband (who also has lost both of his parents, and has no extended family), so this entire transition is beyond overwhelming for me right now. Especially the next month or so. My main questions are: -if I begin in the summer with the early start, when will I know if I can get any aid during that period? -if all else fails, would I at least be able to get a loan of some kind? -I do not have access to the student jobs portal to sign in, can I still apply for jobs right now? -when the scholarships say “for tuition and fees”, as it pertains to the summer term, does that include any sections for housing costs? Or is that in a completely separate category?
The last thing I want to do is jeapordize this opportunity by asking financial aid. It is simply a dream come true, and I do not want to be “that guy”.. But this transition period, though i know it will pass, is something I cannot figure out on my own despite my best efforts.

Demographics: junior, black, first-gen, T5 private boarding Hooks: URM, FGLI, Feeder School Intended major(s): idrk Academics: SAT: 1550 Class rank: Top 5-10% UW/W GPA: 3.7/4.0 (MAJOR UPWARD TREND DUE TO CATASTROPHIC FRESHMAN YR CIRCUMSTANCES). average HYPSM gpa here is 3.8 By Senior Year Coursework: MVC, college lvl financial math, AP Macro, AP Micro, APUSH, College major level bio x2, history independent project (beyond college level), AP Lit, AP lang, AP Calc BC, abstract math, history research project (college major level), APCSP, 2 extra college level english courses
awards:
prestigious fellowship, developed novel global health framework for int’l implementation. (International) Top 8 in econ oly/4300 active members (International) USACO Plat biz comp Finalist out of over 1,200 participants (International) biz comp T15 placement (International) Extracurriculars: co-founder @ synbio startup. Engineering novel test for a type of cancer. developing drug to treat type of diabetes w/ over 5.6k waitlisted. 10 major partnerships deal partner and Portfolio Company Mentor at $10MM VC firm, serve as board member for mentored startups scout and panelist board member of $180MM early-stage VC firm
scout + portfolio company mentor for $150MM early-stage firm. 2.5% equity stake of firm’s carried interest in startups supported.
published author on DeFi to peer-reviewed professional journal.
published author on an econ model to peer-reviewed professional journal.
HYPSM Research Assistant on collecting comparative and historical data on police brutality in the USA
first author of 480-page Academic Book on Global Health, peer-reviewed.
Director of Finance @ history journal, raised/managed over $160k, distributing 30k/year in scholarships for competition winners
Founding Partner at 501c(3) offering pro bono consulting to small businesses. Aiding 20+ small businesses w/ combined $1.25MM AUM achieve 150% avg. growth through pro bono consulting
Director of Quant Finance @ Finance-based NPO, 400 students worldwide, raised $50k, partnered with Google
EXTRA: yea i mean as u can see i am interested and passionate about a lot of fields but i am not sure which to hone in on esp as apps szn is right around the corner. any help is appreciated. additionally bc i have come under scrutiny online b4 i am not lying about any of this stuff on god

WPA – A Completely Average Roadtrip
Disclaimer: Not canon, and I don’t use patreon so please don’t spoil me. Also, any opinion held by a character is that of the characters and not my own. Enjoy.
Town of Ljosalfington, local time 14:00, week 7
Emma Booker
“Again Illunor, I warned you before that this is a utility vehicle, not a party rated smart-limo. I am already compromising more than I should by allowing you to use the sample cooler as a minifridge, one which I can’t even use!” I said as I loaded the materials I had just purchased into the back of the high-G All terrain fusion-ethanol-electric hybrid 24th-century legacy pickup truck that I had printed out earlier this week, carefully avoiding the heavy ordinance hard point.
“That is hardly an excuse for that abysmally cramped leg space barely fit for cattle, never mind the bare minimum for standard decorum suitable for nobility. If this is what a car is like, then I don’t see why you care for your technology,” complained Illunor, who was sitting around idly with a malformed garish bowl of icecream that he had stashed away from lunch.
“If it bothers you so much, perhaps you could help next time with your ‘bigger-on-the-inside’ magic,” I retorted as I slid the last core sample into the back before covering it up with a tarp and strapping it down.
I had originally planned to visit Ljosalfington by myself to acquire much needed exo-materials to test various mana manipulator configurations as I worked to develop my first wand as not all of the materials I needed were procurable locally from Elaseer. I eventually yielded, much to my regret, to allowing Illunor to come with me as he insisted on wanting to deliver a letter personally in town after Thacea had pointed out the wisdom of not travelling alone.
We continued our back and forth for a bit yet as I finished securing my payload a voice called out to me from the direction of the town.
“Excuse me a moment, I couldn’t help but notice but are you from the academy?”
I turned to see an elf dressed in a plain brown buttoned up tunic matched by a slightly shabby pair of trousers with what appeared to be a lute upon his back and a plain and unenchanted longsword on his belt gesturing at our robes. Mine especially were new and unusual, tailored by the academy to go over my armour and allow access to the anchor points and allow me to exit my armour with minimal hassle. Illunor scoffed at what was evidently a commoner’s arrogance at approaching nobility and turned his head away in disgust. I glanced at Illunor and shook my head before turning to face the new man. I had time to spare, and any opportunity to engage in a hearts-and-minds dialogue with the locals outside the bounds of the managed environment of the academy was more than worth the time to chat. Especially as most of the other locals seemed to be content in ignoring me.
“Yes, we are currently studying at the Transgracian Academy. I am Cadet Emma Booker representing the United Nations of Earth and Luna from Earthream, and my aloof compatriot is Lord Illunor Rularia of the Vunerian courts. We were just about to head back but are in no rush. May I ask your name and what brings you by?” I asked with my hand outstretched in greeting.
“Ah yes, yes. My name is Edhel Redoehdelnif, a wandering bard by trade like my father and his father before him. My apologies, Cadet Emma Booker, I am unfamiliar with Earthrealm,” said Edhel as he grasped my hand with both of his and shook it tepidly yet vigorously. Or rather, tried to, as the motors on my suit resisted his efforts.
“News doesn’t seem to spread all that fast around here, so it makes sense you haven’t heard of us. We’re a new realm, and only just got here. Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Edhel Redoehdelnif,” I replied.
“Absolutely fascinating! And a knight no less, or perhaps a squire? I’m sure you have many stories to tell of Earthrealm. Say, by chance are you about to head back to the academy? I have business in Elaseer and the usual coach has been absent as of late so I would rather not go it alone,” said Edhel.
I was hesitant to bring a stranger back in the car with me, even if Illunor was present. However, the opportunity that meeting a bard presented was too good to pass up from an intel perspective and to win the favour of the populace at large.
“That is a great idea. I think I have room for one more…” I paused before gesturing towards Illunor, “provided everyone is ok with it that is.”
Illunor gave a huff and turned his head away in silence.
“Very well, I will allow this. But he will not be joining me in your sorry excuse for a coach,” said Illunor dismissively.
Illunor approached the backseat expectantly and the door opened for him automatically, allowing the dlc kobold to gracefully enter and lounge across the length of the seats, once again ignoring the seatbelts. I sighed as I made my way to the driver’s seat, and Edhel entered from the passenger side as he marveled at the automatic doors and the interior.
“What a strange carriage this is! Although I must say, shouldn’t you be retrieving your horses? I didn’t see any harnesses or sense any artifices,” inquired Edhel as he attempted to make himself comfortable on the car seat, lute in front of him.
“Oh no, this thing doesn’t need horses or magic,” I said with a chuckle as EVI started the car. The elf raised his eyebrows at the sudden hum of the engine and made an expression of alarm when the car started driving itself without my input. “See, purrs like a kitten.”
“Earthrealm must have some large kittens if they purr like that,” noted Edhel, “but you must be concealing the enchantments somewhere. Such a thing as this with such strange yet precise craftsmanship is only possible in the crownlands.”
“Nope, no magic,” I said cheerfully.
“Then how?” Asked Edhel.
“It’s rather simple really. Are you familiar with the workings of a mill?” I asked, deciding to keep things surface level and elementary to avoid provoking the IDOV threshold.
“Somewhat, though I confess to not being familiar with their workings. Are you suggesting this is akin to a mill?” Asked Edhel perplexed.
“It’s the same principal. A mill works by taking a source of rotation such as a waterwheel or windmill, transferring that rotation along a series of rotating shafts and interlocking gears, and finally putting that energy to work by rotating a millstone,” I began as the car pulled out onto the smooth cobbled road in the direction of Elaseer. A notification popped up in the corner of my vision indicating my recon drone swarm had shifted from a holding formation to a convoy screening formation, and while the roads were clear I kept the speed at 60km/h to account for my passenger’s apparent distaste for seatbelts.
“Rotation…” muttered Edhel. He turned to face one of the wheels and EVI pinged an alert for a probable match for a detection spell, “fascinating.”
“Edhel, what are you doing?” I asked.
“Oh, yes, perhaps I should have asked first. Yes, I can see how it all fits together. But the source of this rotation? I see no mighty river or great wind to power this, so where does it come from?” Asked Edhel, not really apologizing. Elven arrogance, it seemed, was not limited by class.
The act reminded me of Sorecar when he inspected my gun, but where the armourer had been respectful with it, Edhel was more flippant. I considered the possibility that he was a spy sent by one of her peers or the crownlands, though this did not mesh with the methods I had seen so far. Edhel may have been just overly enthusiastic. In either case, I quickly decided to only reveal the antique design for the ethanol engine, and not that of the batteries or the emergency coupler to my suit’s fusion reactor.
“Right, well please ask first next time. As to your question, I won’t bore you with the details, but the rotation is generated by creating a periodic sequence of explosions inside of a machine – a manaless artifice – called a combustion engine, said Emma.
“So that’s what that sound is…” pondered Edhel, “are these artifices typical in Earthream?”
“You are awfully inquisitive for a commoner,” noted Illunor as he inspected his nails for dirt, “and rather accepting of something which should be impossible.”
“I wouldn’t be much of a bard if I wasn’t, my lord,” said Edhel shifting uncomfortably in his seat, “perhaps some music might set the mood better?”
“That would be preferable, bard. I have heard enough of the Earthrealmer’s Road Trip Playlist and would like to listen to some music of real culture,” said Illunor.
The bard agreed and proceeded to awkwardly play a ballad about an adventurer who slew a hydra in some frozen wasteland. Partway through, I politely interrupted the Edhel to point out the seat controls much to his fascination and Illunor’s grumbling at their common nature, and after some adjustment the bard went on playing and I half-heartedly listened while I paid attention to the road and my drone feed.
Particularly after EVI detected something unusual and alerted me to its presence.
”Attention Caded Booker. There is a disabled vehicle blocking the primary route to destination. Heat signatures in the woods are consistent with that of an ambush.”
“Damn it,” I muttered.
I glanced at the drone feed to see a broken cart strewn horizontally across a wooden bridge over a brook. On the surface it looked like a pair of civilians who required aid and assistance, but off in the woods were several heat signatures, several of which held weapons of varying levels of enchantments. Occasionally one of the pair on the bridge would talk with them, suggesting they were in cahoots rather than hostages. I recalled crossing that very bridge not a few hours earlier, so the blockade was very recent.
“EVI, did we pass that cart on the way here?” I asked.
”Negative,” replied EVI.
I grimaced. I had been trained to handle road-side ambushes, but it was only something that was a theoretical possibility. Something that should only occur in a warzone or a corrupt and unstable polity. I knew I had the capacity to handle such an encounter, even non-lethally, but that didn’t change the fact that these were civilians and as such were the responsibility of local law enforcement. Combined with the fact that I had passengers I was responsible for and engaging the ambush was a risky option.
“EVI, give me a list of alternative routes,” I commanded.
”Affirmative. Here is a list of routes in order of recommendation,” replied EVI.
I looked over the routes superimposed on a map of the region and quickly dismissed taking a shortcut through the forest and cutting through farmland. A detour caught my eye that extended the journey by roughly ten kilometers and I immediately sent a pair of drones to scout it out before committing to the detour.
“Are you alright, Cadet Emma Booker? You seem distracted,” asked Edhel, snapping me back to reality.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just focused on driving,” replied Emma.
“I suppose it must be quite taxing to command an artificed carriage of this complexity. Perhaps it might ease your mind if you were to regale me a tale of a hero of your realm?” Said Edhel, strumming a complex tune from his lute as he spoke as each and every pluck triggered a low-level spell.
“Well, that may be a problem. We don’t have any monsters to fight, and wars are a thing of the past,” I said while desperately tip-toeing the subject of aunt Ran, the subject of war, and our voyages through the cosmos, “though we are not without the adventurous spirit. We certainly have many stories of grand voyages. Some mythical and fictional such as The Odyssey as told by the Greek poet Homer and some historical such as the race to the south pole.”
“The south pole,” muttered the bard, “so you have explored all of Earthrealm then? I suppose that makes some sense, if you have artifices such as this then traversal of a globe would be quite manageable.”
“You are quite perceptive,” I said, not wishing to elaborate.
“A great performer knows his audience,” said Edhel with a charming, honest, almost human smile.
I felt a pang of homesickness as an intrusive thought reminded me that I could have gone to a real college surrounded by friendly faces my age, engaging in nightly holostreams and dreaming of adventures in the stars from the safety of a college dorm room. The sight of Illunor in the rear camera was the only thing that kept me grounded, as I almost felt like I was back at home on a road trip rather than returning to a fantasy feudal court, constantly evading death at every turn with the fate of humanity on the line. As such, and prompted by EVI, I barely had the wherewithal to take the planned detour.
A fact which did not pass by Edhel.
“I believe you may have taken a wrong turn, Emma,” he commented.
“Nah, I’m just taking the scenic route. I came from that direction on the way here, and you have inspired me to see the other road and I figure it should only add a few extra minutes to our travel time,” I said, gesturing at a paper map which I had referenced exactly once, “though on that subject, you seem to know these lands quite well. Do you have any recommendations on places to visit in the Nexus to scratch that itch?”
Illunor raised his eyebrow at the detour excuse, knowing full well this was not part of the plan. I worried that he might complain about the issue and but thankfully remained silent as he snacked on the contents of the misused sample storage unit. Edhel himself took on a more pensive posture.
“I’m happy to have been such an inspiration, Emma, though I am sure an explorer such as yourself has little need of such. I would normally suggest the skyward fountains of Verdellan or the cloud tides of Asturia, but that may be too casual for someone of your calibre. Perhaps the severed chasm or the fire marsh of Bhandahova may be more to your liking. Or perhaps…” Edhel leaned in, “I have heard rumours of a dragon in the glassy obsidian wastes of Vurcanar.”
I chuckled at that, knowing how I was fortunate enough to fish a dragon scale out of the nearby lake for the ECS. “The thought of going dragon hunting had certainly crossed my mind…” I mused aloud.
“Yet you sound hesitant. Perhaps it is too much for a newrealmer. Perhaps a slime or a dire rat might be more appropriate,” he said with a tease.
“No, it’s not like that! It’s” I stammered, before attempting to change course after realizing I had been goaded, “what I mean is, I was under the impression that dragons were an endangered species. Where I come from, hunting endangered animals is usually illegal, and big game hunting in general is frowned upon. We do make exceptions in the case of problem animals such as if a large predator starts hunting humans, but as a rule we prefer conservation and try to find ways of coexisting with wildlife such as the use of barrier fences and scaring away dangerous animals rather than being forced to cull their numbers. Having a species go extinct would prevent future generations from appreciating them and risks destabilizing the ecosystem they are a part of. Now if this dragon was actively razing villages and eating civilians and livestock, that would be one thing, but this does not look to be the case. I don’t imagine the Nexus has any settlements in this wasteland, and the dragon clearly wants to be left alone. Killing an innocent dragon would be murder.”
I grinned to myself after delivering a diatribe that would have made my tenth grade social and environmental studies teacher beam with pride, though by the expressions of my passengers my view did not appear to be shared. Edhel’s mouth was agape in shock and fascination, while the Venurian in the back seat merely huffed in disapproval.
“I assure you Newrealmer, there are no innocent dragons,” stated Illunor with a hint of terseness breaking through his otherwise regal demeanor.
“Illunor, I understand that Venurians have personal reasons for not liking dragons, but you can’t just extend that disdain to their descendants or those uninvolved just because they are the same species,” I said.
“If I may interject on your behalf, my lord, I believe I can address Cadet Emma Booker’s concerns,” said Edhel with a bow. Illunor nodded in approval.
“Very well, you may proceed,” he said.
“Thank you, my lord. My dear Emma, you must understand that dragons are not simple animals driven entirely off of instinct as it appears to be the case in Earthrealm. They are monsters. Intelligent, long-lived, violent, greedy, cruel, territorial, selfish flesh-eating monsters. They are evil by the very nature of their being, unable to change by their own accord, and unwilling to change when His Eternal Majesty offered them freedom from their nature. It isn’t that they want to be evil. As intelligent animals – intelligent monsters – dragons are capable of understanding morality, and many have tried to overcome their evil nature at great expense to themselves. A well intended and noble sentiment, yet a doomed one as like all animals, they all succumb to their nature in the end. Overcoming one’s nature is impossible,” said Edhel. His eyes took on a stoic, almost remorseful gaze as he spoke, and Illunor nodded with approval.
I was appalled by this claim, not by the contents so much as how blatantly false it was. As a representative of the human race, I was a living counterexample to his whole argument. We had remained physiologically unchanged as a species since the last Ice Age, and yet in spite of that, in spite of our many flaws, we had found peace and balance. If we could do it, anyone could do it.
“Will all due respect Edhel, that is nonsense. Monsters aren’t born, they are made. It is the mark of any intelligent species can adapt their behaviour to their environment for better or worse, and under the right care any so-called monster can grow to be a force for good,” I began, but while I searched for the right words Edhel shook his head.
“I appreciate your race is an empathetic one, Emma, your idealism is unfounded. As flesh eaters, a dragon must take the life of another animal or person to survive, or they will perish. As such, every dragon has taken a life. As long-lived creatures, they will have amassed a significant number of kills. As the land can only support so much animals, a dragon must be fiercely territorial and aggressive to remove competition, lest they starve. As such, even the most kind-hearted dragon alive must be violent and greedy, and their intelligence fuels this even more so if they know a bountiful land of morsels exists just outside their range.
Now perhaps a multitude of dragons may find a way to co-exist together in some settlement, but to support such a venture would require a large territory of prey, or a livestock animal. Perhaps they could support a large colony by farming grain for their livestock, but that would require effort on their behalf. As large animals, such efforts require a great deal of energy. Yet that size makes it easy for them to intimidate smaller races to do their labour for them, and to keep their client race in line dragons must be cruel. And even so, as their numbers grow so do their needs. As such, they must expand into the lands of their neighbours to survive until there is nothing left to devour, at which point they must turn against their own lest they starve. As such, it is the nature of dragons to conquer and devour. That is why there is no such thing as an innocent dragon,” finished Edhel.
I was speechless, not because I believed Edhel had a point, but because I was horrified at how easy he found it to rationalize the extermination of an entire sapient species. If this was how the elves thought, then it wasn’t the dragons who were the monsters. I suppressed that dark thought. Edhel’s thought process was a product of his culture, not a feature of his elven heritage. If there was any hope of peace between our people, I needed to show him there was another way of being. I needed to prove that co-existence was possible, no matter one’s nature.
I took a deep breath to steady myself before replying.
“That- that is a callous way of seeing things,” I began, though the shock was still there in my voice, “you speak as though there is no natural equilibrium with a dragon, that their only state of being must be to be cruel, to devour, to conquer. But I see things differently. In fact, I might wonder if a fledgling civilization might see the presence of a dragon as a boon rather than a curse. Being intelligent, the locals may be able to come to some agreement with the dragon. Perhaps they might leave some land as a hunting ground or offer up a share of their cattle or guard the dragon as it sleeps. In exchange, the dragon might allow them to build a town outside its mountain and protect them in times of danger. An equitable exchange. A civilization might even create artificial lairs to attract dragons for this very reason. True, some dragons may behave tyrannical towards their town, but a well armed populace of a large city would be more than capable of fighting such a threat, and a rational dragon might reason that threatening their own populace would put their reliable source of food and shelter at risk. You see, it’s all a matter of perspective.”
“You certainly are an imaginative one, Emma, to wonder up a quixotic world where the hare and the fox live together in harmony as equals. Even so, you seem to have ignored one key detail to such a society. What would happen should the dragon not be fed for months on end?” Asked Edhel with his eyebrow raised.
“The same thing as stranded a dozen starving, stranded Elves!” I spat back.
[Alert: Vehicle speed above recommended limit for conditions. Recommendation: slow down. ]
“I am driving slow!” I seethed, not realizing I had sped up with manual control enabled.
“I grow tired of this common prattle,” interjected Illunor just in time to prevent an awkward silence, “bard, play us another song.” “As my lord wishes,” said Edhel with a bow before turning to me with another smile, “perhaps a more soothing melody would be in order? A love song perhaps, to honour Cadet Booker’s compassionate nature?”
I said nothing as Edhel began to strum his lute again to the tune of a love story of a pair of doomed lovers named Ramian and Junette, hating his cheeky knowing grin that only served to get under my skin further as I focused on calming down and slowing the car back to a more reasonable pace before investigating a priority alert which I had been blinded to moments prior.
[Alert: hostile roadblock is absent, location unknown.]
Shit.
“Illunor, we may have a problem,” I said.
“Shush, Newrealmer, have you no class? We are almost at the best part! I’m sure it can wait,” replied the contextually clueless lizard.
I had never wanted to throttle Illunor as much as I did now.
“Illunor, shield, now,” I said with a raised voice.
“I don’t see-“ he started, pausing mid-sentence as his ears perked up.
[Alert: Multiple manafield and spell signatures detected!]
I took evasive maneuvers as Illunor tried to piece together a shield spell, fumbling it twice as panic appeared to set in and providing me with a reminder that Illunor was a civilian, not a soldier. A hail of arrows pelted the exterior of the truck, piercing but not penetrating the composite armour. I was tempted to do nothing but just drive away from the arrow fire, but a foreboding premonition of danger filled me as I recalled Sorecar’s hunter-seeker arrows.
Seeking to avoid that fate, I triggered the active defenses.
The smoke screens deployed around the vehicle, obscuring the sight of any who depended on visible light to see me. A barrage of decoy flares equipped with wooden cores shot upward at angles and diffusing to the side like a pair of giant wings which when combined with the MFD, short for mana-field dampener, inside the vehicle meant that the pelting hail of arrowfire softened to a whirr as the arrows whiffed over the top of the truck, retargeted away from the soft flesh of my passengers and even invoking friendly fire amongst the ambushers.
In the chaos, EVI and my drone swarm fed me complete tactical information on the ambush. Of the 26 individuals at the first blockade, 20 were accounted for, and 3 had died from friendly fire. Ahead at the bridge, 5 more of them were at the bridge where a barrier had been hastily erected to cage me in as the river valley was too deep to cross.
“Illunor, we need a bridge,” I said, taking stock of the wellbeing of my passengers.
The bard was huddled down low and suppressing his manafield, but otherwise rather composed. Illunor, on the other hand, was cowering in the gap between the seats with his hands covering his eyes and his tail tucked in.
“A bridge is no small request, Ne- Cadet Emma Booker,” replied Illunor, “and your ‘Emeffdee’ has blinded me to the outside of this moving death trap.”
“If I drop it, can you at least make a ramp?” I asked as I circled the battlefield. Or tried to, at least, as earthen ramparts emerged from the ground from a yet unseen source to cut off other avenues of escape.
“A ramp? Surely you don’t mean-“ he stammered.
“Yes or no,” I said.
Illunor paused, before taking an unsteady breath.
“Yes. But not with that Emeffdee,” he replied.
“Good. Steady your nerves and prepare to make a ramp ahead of us on my signal,” I said, “in the meantime, get your seatbelt on. This is going to be hairy.”
As I circled around to make my approach on the bridge, the final combatant made his appearance on a nearby tree, revealing himself as an elven mage. An alert focused on the air around him indicating he was preparing an unknown high-tier spell, and I locked the predator drone on him indicating the elf as a high-priority target if our escape plan failed, and I was forced to use lethal force.
If I was forced to kill.
It was one thing to know you may have to kill in the line of duty, but it was much harder to reconcile that with reality. No number of simulations could match the real thing, and a part of me wanted to simply offload the responsibility to EVI to keep my hands clean, but to do that would be betraying my duty as a human being. I breathed in deep and tried not to think about it, instead hoping to rely on the ace I held in my sleeve instead.
“EVI, ready the spell jammer,” I said unevenly.
“Acknowledged, the prototype Exo-Radiation Wave-Field Distruptor is primed. High risk target identified and locked, permission to engage?” EVI asked, forcing me to address the dreaded question.
“Negative,” I replied, “hold your fire. If the ramp fails, then you have permission to engage,” I said.
“Affirmative, on your mark,” replied EVI.
I lined up the truck with the bridge and bolted through the smoke, keeping a careful eye on the mage as I went. His spellform took on a more concerning shape as I accelerated, and I realized I could not afford to let him finish his spell. I triggered the spelljammer.
A terrible roar erupted from an array of speakers printed from mana-resistant materials that would have made Godzilla herself beam with pride. The sound was decidedly unnatural, gnarly, dubstep drop composed of an electric eel, a whale, a mountain lion, and a tyrannosaurus rex all being simultaneously assaulted by a swarm of angry cybernetic murder hornets as an equally chaotic wave of mana blasted outwards from the exterior of the truck, with the interior thankfully sheltered by audio and mana dampening.
The ambushing assailants cowered and panicked, and it was enough to cause the Elven mage’s spell to backfire in his face as his form exploded into ashes, meeting a horrific fate which I had tried so desperately to help him avoid. With all the combatants momentarily incapacitated or dead, I lowered the dampener and turned off the smoke.
“Ramp!” I shouted, snapping the lizard back to reality.
The Venerian nodded and hastily formed an earthwork ahead of us right before the blockade, and the truck leapt off the ramp with a not insignificant amount of air beneath our wheels. I braced for impact, regretting skimping on the shocks in the name of preserving materials, but the impact never came.
[Alert: Friendly spell designated ‘Feather Fall’]
Illunor thankfully had enough wherewithal to gently land the steel brick, and I sped off into the distance away from the trap that had unfolded behind us, leaving the interior of the truck in an awkward silence as we each processed our brush with death in our own way. “How many are dead?” I asked EVI.
“6 hostiles confirmed dead,” replied EVI.
I drove on in silence. Those were six deaths I had tried to avoid, and I became lost in thought as I wondered what I should have done differently to avoid the confrontation entirely.
Edhel broke the silence with a bout of laughter.
“Terrific! Absolutely terrific! Why, I can conjure up many a tale from this encounter alone! I live for this kind of inspiration!” Exclaimed Edhel a little too chipperly considering the circumstance.
“I would rather not hear stories about how I bravely ran away,” I moaned in deadpan sarcasm.
“You think too little of yourself, Cadet Emma Booker. It is plain to me that you are no ordinary rabbit. Make no mistake, I see it as a privilege to bear witness to the roar of a vorpal hare!” Said Edhel as he supressed his laughter, “though I am afraid with all the excitement that I must finish my song some other time.”
“How about I play some of our music?” I offered after the elf revealed his thrill-seeking side.
“Splendid, I would like that. Perhaps something of your ‘Roadtrip playlist’ you speak of? It sounds like a collection of your voyages,” said Edhel.
“That would be an improvement on the truth,” said Illunor dismissively as he eased from his state of shock, “it is little more than noise under the pretense of music.”
“Illunor…” I muttered to myself before turning the mic on, “no, no it’s not like that. I have terabytes of pre-recorded songs from various artists back home which can be played by… an artifice called a speaker. A playlist is a set of songs which are grouped together, usually to listen to in specific situations such as studying, partying, or travelling. The latter collection is what Illunor is referring to.”
I very deliberately chose not to reveal my ‘Unfortunate Daughters’ playlist.
“An artifice which plays music, and a magicless one at that. I must say, Emma, I fear for the bards in your realm,” said Edhel with a laugh.
“Your fear is misplaced, Edhel. Entertainers live like kings where I come from,” I retorted with a smirk of my own, “well, the ones with talent at least.”
“Well, well, I suppose I have to hear my competition!” Said Edhel with a laugh.
“Do as you must, though let it be known that I warned you,” said Illunor as he watched a play on his sightseer.
I had EVI compile a list of songs that left out content offensive to Nexian sensibilities or violating OpSec and as it compiled I mused over what type of sample spread I wanted to show off. Then it struck me. What better way to show off our culture than with some good old blue jumpers and nova rock! Sadly, jumpers were unavailable to show but I still had a whole list of modern artists to choose from.
Moments later, the car speakers sprung to life to the tune of ‘Innocent Youth of Mine. Edhel’s eyes lit up like a child visiting a zero-g gravity park for the first time, seemingly star-struck by the antique electric guitar and the synthesizer-drums in particular.
“What… what is this? I have never heard anything like this!” Proclaimed Edhel.
“Dreadful, isn’t it?” said Illunor, doing what he did best and pretending to hate it.
“Oh there is a lot more where that came from,” I said with a cheeky grin of my own, “this one is called ‘Innocent Youth of Mine’ by ‘Cannons and Poppies’. It’s part of the Nova Rock genre.
“And those strange instruments?” Asked Edhel.
“Oh, you mean the electric guitar and the synthesizer. They are electronic instruments, taking advantage of channeled and modulated electricity to create near any sound we can imagine,” I replied.
“Channeled electricity… are you suggesting these sounds were made by some form of lightning?” Asked Edhel.
[Suggestion: Avoid topic of electricity due to OpSec risk]
I nodded at EVI’s warning, thankful that it caught me before I discussed the very thing that all of my equipment ran on.
“It’s not exactly lightning, but close enough,” I said.
“If I had not witnessed to your display of power earlier, I might have perhaps been more skeptical of such a claim, but I suppose a lady must keep her secrets.” said Edhel with a raised eyebrow and chuckle, “but I digress, this music is most interesting.”
“There is a lot more where that came from,” I said with a cheeky grin of my own.
“If I ever have a prisoner in need of torture, I will turn to you first,” replied Illunor, “if you are willing to subject your peers to this madness then I cannot imagine what you would force upon your enemies before dunking them in ice.”
“In your dreams,” I retorted.
I played a few other songs including Astrodesee’s ‘Meteor Struck’, the Martian classic ‘Hotel Cydonia’ and even ‘Switching to Warp’ before Elaseer emerged from the distance, and I pulled up outside the gate to drop Edhel off.
“Here already?” Asked Edhel.
“Well, yeah. I was just running a quick errand, I didn’t want to go too far,” I replied casually.
“That was a distance worth at least five days of walking by foot, and you call that a ‘quick errand’?” Asked Edhel. I shrugged, and he laughed.
“Well in any case, thank you for allowing me passage in your car. I must apologize for my lack of gift or payment…” said Edhel. “Don’t worry about it, it was on the way,” I replied.
“I see, how generous. Perhaps we might one day meet again?” Asked Edhel.
“Maybe, but I’m not sure how likely that is. The academy takes up most of my time,” I replied, “though you never know. I still have a lot of quest hours to complete.”
“Is that so? In that case, I hope we meet again! Goodbye Cadet Emma Booker and farewell Lord Illunor Rularia,” he said. “And good travels to you, bard,” said Illunor.
I waved off Edhel and drove back to the academy, Illunor still sulking in the back seat.
“Perhaps next time, you should steer us away from danger?” Suggested Illunor.
“I tried, but we were tracked,” I replied.
I groaned inwardly at the additional work needed to fix the truck. EVI compiled a list of upgrades for future engagements, batting away my idea for a ‘turbo mode’ and a ‘jump boost’. Though at the end of the day, meeting the bard wasn’t a complete loss. It felt good to talk to someone almost normal for once, and I hoped I met him again.
Edhel Redoehdelnif
I watched as Cadet Emma Booker’s vehicle went off into the distance, getting one last look at the Earthrealmer’s strange artifice before turning towards the gate. The voyage was an exotic experience, not unlike that of a fever dream or a peak into a world completely alien to my own. Indeed, it was a struggle to contain my excitement and enthusiasm and process the experience rationally as I made my way through the southern gates of Elaseer and turned the corner of an alley before entering an impossible structure that did not exist.
“You are earlier than expected,” said the shadowy figure of my handler as I made my way to the meeting hall.
“The Earthrealmer’s means of transportation proved far more expedient than anticipated, my lord” I spoke as I knelt before him, “even with her unexpected departure from the anticipated road and the ambush we traveled for scantly more than an hour.”
“Yes, I will require a full report from you. Perhaps you can shed some light on the ‘smoke dragon’ my men claim intervened on the Earthrealmer’s behalf,” said my handler.
“Smoke Dragon, my lord?” I asked.
My handler responded by activating his sight-seer, revealing how the ambush had appeared from the outside. The Earthrealmer’s uncanny artifice traversed down the road, a pair of manafields displaying proudly from within until the archers began their assault. The artifice then transformed as smoke billowed out from its pores and wings sprung forth above until it was the form of a mighty wrym with a pair of glowing eyes springing forth from its ever extending head where it then gave forth a terrible unholy roar which sent waves of mana outward. The mage working to seal the area and trap their mark vapourized in an instant as his spell backfired. It was apparent to Edhel that his exceptional experience in the carriage was merely a muted rendition of the events unfolding around them.
It would seem the hare had the shadow of a dragon.
“I do have some insight, though I must confess the Earthrealmer did very little in the way of direct action. I suspect she has some unseen means of commanding and scrying through her artifices,” I said, “one which does not utilize magic as we know it.”
“Such a statement is heresy,” said my handler, “but such special circumstances are your reason for being. I will require you submit your memories for verification. What is your appraisal of the new realmer?”
“The girl is far more dangerous than a surface appraisal would suggest, though she prefers to conceal that power rather than utilize it out of a misplaced sense of compassion. Her people appear to have a boundless creative drive through which such artifices are birthed, though again it is misdirected towards more common applications. I believe that if properly tamed, this human animal may provide us with great works of art,” I said with a bow.
“I see. Does the girl know you work for us?” Asked my handler.
“She may harbour some suspicions, though did not voice them outright beyond concealing her knowledge,” I said, “though nothing significant. Provided our next meet is under believable circumstances such as a festival she should view me as cordial.”
“She has indeed proven clever,” conceded my handler, “very well, I will make arrangements for your paths to cross again. Perhaps I will arrange for her to be a contestant at the next inter-academy tournament. In the mean time, prepare your report and don’t wander far. This is a priority assignment.”
“As you wish, my lord,” I said with a bow and a smile.
Emma Booker had proved to be an interesting animal indeed, and I hoped our paths crossed again.

I was accepted into Colby College from the waitlist this 2023-24 class of ‘28 college app season and they gave me the best financial aid as a lower income out of state student from the west coast. I only would’ve had to pay less than $2000 for everything including both my direct and indirect costs and it was such an amazing and wonderful opportunity. Ultimately I chose a school a little closer to home and was able to use Colby’s aid offer to ask for more aid. If I didn’t get into the school I am going to attend I would have definitely chosen Colby and the admissions officer who called me to tell me the good news was so kind and made me feel great even though I was nervous. If you’re reading this and considering Colby I would say definitely apply because even if you don’t get fee waivers they made their application free and it’s an amazing school with good travel abroad opportunities which are accessible to lower income students. I am so grateful to Colby even though I won’t be attending and will always hold the school in the highest of regards!

Not an out of the ordinary student profile. No I'm not only applying to UMiami but it's definitely my #1, it's just the only one I'm really interested in doing a chanceme for.
Might apply ED based on how hard of a reach this is.*
Demographics: White/Native American (registered member of state recognized tribe, not BS), Male, out of state, single income middle class
Intended Major: Marine Biology/Ecology
SAT: 1390 - 760 English 630 Math - (Just the first try, will try more to improve superscore)
ACT: Will take in June
UW GPA: 3.95 (got one B freshman year geometry) -- Weighted GPA: 4.15
Class Rank: 10/375
AP's: (Took all AP's offered by school, which was unfortunately very few) AP World History, APUSH, AP Environmental Science
Other Honors*:* Will take all of my classes for senior year at a community college through a high school program (allows oustanding highschoolers that want to get more challenging classes to instead take college classes for dual credit). I don't know how much this will impact application since by the time I will be applying there will not be a transcript of this. Does anyone have further insight into how things like that work?
EC's: Slalom + GS Varsity Ski Racing athlete, President of school's Marine Conservation Club, Internship with US National Forest Service (analyzed and monitored local aquatic fish populations alongside a Supervisory Fish Biologist), Key Club Member, NHS member, and Green Club member (another general environmental conservation club)
Essay: About my experience being trapped in a forest fire for two days while hiking when I was 11, and how the event inspired a deep respect for wildlife management and conservation. I'm pretty confident in my skills as a writer and I think I can make a strong essay.
Other: My school is somewhat rural, and has limited opportunities for excelling students (hence the lack of AP's - we literally don't have any more than what I took), might mention that to demonstrate that I wasn't justslacking and not taking AP's that were offered.
*I am considering ED to increase my chances of acceptance, but if I don't recieve any significant financial aid package, I don't want to be locked into that contract. I've also heard that ED students get smaller aid packages since they don't need to entice you, you're locked in. I don't need a full ride or anything like that, but some base level financial aid or annual scholarship would go a long way.
Anyways just lmk how much of a reach this is, and ways to improve my application come december. Thanks for reading.

i (F22) had jumped into uni right after high school, only to find i wasn't any good with chemistry or math for my major (environmental science), then eventually money was the issue so i had to drop after 2-ish years i think. went to community college, changed major (computer science), still couldn't get into it. bad grades led to no financial aid. so, i tried finding a different path, and am now working on getting certified as a pharm tech. thing is, i hear workload isn't worth the pay. i thought about just doing it and saving up to try community college again and major in communications, simple and easy, and do marketing or something. maybe get even higher ed if it calls for it. being neurodivergent certainly doesn't help + being chronically ill, getting health scares every now and then, working double just to function properly. just wished everything didn't need so much money, including just living. what can i really do here?

Helloooo, I'm a junior and I'm trying to narrow my college list, and find more realistic target schools. Science and math have always been my weakest points, but I've always challenged myself nonetheless. If you have any college recommendations for me, I'd really appreciate it!!! Sorry this is so long!!
Demographics: M, White/Persian (dual citizen), TN, private school
Hooks: Performing arts
Intended Major(s): Biomedical Engineering, minor in Theater or Astronomy
ACT/SAT/SAT II: ACT - 26 (breakdown-- math 21, science 23, stem 22, eng 27, reading 33) SAT - 1220 (reading/writing-- 660, math-- 460)
UW/W GPA: Freshman GPA: 3.8 Sophomore GPA: 3.3 (medical leave) Junior GPA: 4.1 cumulative on record: 3.55 all weighted, cumulative hasn't been properly calculated (mistake in school's system)
Coursework: Freshman/Sophomore year I completed fine arts training (my academic lineage goes to Michelangelo) DP Eng Lit HL (A), DP AA SL (B), DP Physics HL (C), DP Anthro SL (B) Photography and Theater Production as electives, next year is 3rd year of fine arts training
Awards: National Art Honor Society Tri-M Music Honor Society International Thespian Society Scholastic Art and Writing Awards two honorable mentions National Shakespeare Competition Semi-Finalist 2 school awards in acting First in Odyssey of the Mind Ark State (2 years in a row) First in NHD Regional Comp International Honor Thespian by the end of my senior year
ECs: Assistant Director of a musical (2 shows) Directing (1 show) Tech Crew (lighting, sound, and stage) (4 shows) Acting (in hs) (6 shows, 8 by end of senior year) President of Thespian Troupe Part Time Job Art Studio Apprentice Published 3 times in School Anthology Graphic Designer in Student-Run Magazine Freelance Photography Odyssey of the Mind (3 years, will be coaching next year) President of GSA Club Co-founder of Acting Club Member of Local Astronomical Society CIT at Summer Camp School volunteer (19 hours) a lot more I haven't kept track of
Essays/LORs/Other: I believe my essay will be strong. I plan to write about how art has been my way of expressing myself and understanding the world around me, how I strive to be better at science, and my belief that science and art are the same in the sense that they are both ways of navigating the world, etc.
English teacher-- oh so very strong!!! i love my eng teacher she's so sweet :>
Anthro teacher-- haven't seen it yet, but i'm sure it'll be good, i have a natural spark in anthropology and am very active in his class, my teacher is also my advisor so i talk w him a lot more, he also is writing a recommendation for me for a summer program i'm applying to
Art teacher-- i believe this will be quite strong!
Director A-- this one will be !!great!!, she's known me for 7-8 years
Director B-- this one is a bit of a wildcard, he's a silly guy tho and he likes me so ik he'll say good things about me
Schools:
ED - Rice University
EA - UMich Stony Brook University
RD - Carnegie Mellon* NYU* UCSD CPSU (San Luis Obispo) San Diego State University UW UCD DePaul CU Boulder Michigan State
*I'm very passionate for theater and acting, which is why I want to apply to CMU and NYU for acting. I can't afford to fail if I took that route, which is why I'm only applying to reach schools under that major.
I am aware my college list is too long, I am hoping that'll change. I have safeties, I just didn't include them!! In general, I'm very worried about costs. Even though I'm on a single parent income of 100k (net), I am one of four people being financially supported by that income so that support will be limited in college. My parent's gross income is higher than almost every college's need-based cutoff, so I don't qualify for a lot of financial aid. My academics are also just not cutting it for most merit-based scholarships, as well. As I'm currently standing, I'm not eligible for the majority of large scholarships I've come across. Any help for a more realistic academic+financial bar? Thank you so much!!!

There is a price to Faster Than Light travel. A veritable one depending on the Stellar Domain being traversed, a trip might necessitate an offering or a sacrifice of some kind, usually food or items of sentimental value. Rarely has a Domain Warden asked for anything more beyond that as most of their Arch Demon masters would rather not let their main source of Axiomatic power be 'depleted'.
This is the most common case for intra-domain travel. The real trouble begins when you try to cross into another.
Arch Demons don't tend to like their 'property' escaping their clutches, so there is a hefty toll that must be paid to them before they agree to send you over. Not only that, chances are likely that the Domain you wish to travel to is already harbouring another Arch. In that case, you would not only need to satisfy your previous 'benefactor' but also convince the other to allow you entrance.
If that wasn't enough to discourage you, then there is also the lack of protection during your transit to the new domain. See, the reason why Stellar Domains even exist is because the Arch Demons that rule them exude a presence that wards off their unintelligent kin, so with that gone, you're a flying dinner bell.
Every moment your ship stays in Chtho-Space, more and more Lesser Demons will come for you like sharks to chum. They will surround you, their uncountable numbers hollering and scratching at your hull for as long as you can withstand. And if you're still sane, their tricks will become worse, their actions bolder than before. Illusions of the dead, cold whispers into the ears, and the feeling of being watched from the darkness are a few examples of what the Lesser Demons are capable of, but they are not their limits. Remember, never show them what you fear.
The reason for this madness is simple, and it is due to the incorporeal nature of Lesser Demons. As beings formed of pure Chthonic energy, they cannot interact with the Real-Space as is, they require a conduit to affect the material realm. In other words, they must possess a sapient creature.
To do so, an individual on board will be chosen as the vessel and the Demons will haunt them until either the ship reaches its destination 'safely', or they give in. That's when the slaughter begins.
The person, whose mind no longer belongs, will be reborn into a Corporeal Demon and kill off the rest of the crew with powers beyond the understanding of most in this galaxy to ensure its competition is at a minimum. Corpses can't be possessed after all.
With its newly secured intellect, the Corporeal Demon may do one of two things, become a Domain Warden under the watchful eye of an Arch or attempt to ascend into one. And whether it succeeds or fails, the galaxy is darker for it, such is the doomed fate of those under the rule of Demons.
Forever cursed to serve, be used, and forgotten. Everything they once were, boiled down to insignificant specks of blood in a galaxy that lost against Chtho-Space thousands of years ago.
Nevertheless.
As Demons seek to create a world without peace, one mirroring their own, they are bound to find those who are more than up to the task of defending it.
And it is in the void between the domains where they settle.
From the Demons' perspective, not much is known about them, other than that they can intrude into Chtho-Space without the permission or knowledge of a Domain Warden. This freedom of movement has allowed these mysterious warriors to battle on equal if not better footing with the Demons as Lessers can only ride the currents of Chtho-Space, not create them.
Seemingly, they also rescue domain migrators from swarms of Lessers. It is maybe how stories of them are so ubiquitous throughout the galaxy. A myth that emboldens the hearts of those under tyranny and plants the seed of rebellion in those who can no longer bear it.
For those that harbour such intent, the Chthonauts are eager for more members, you will only need to proclaim your wish to fight when one of their patrol ships is nearby while in transit between Domains.
Due to this recruitment method, the Chthonauts are an odd group, strictly speaking, as a whole multitude of different species comprises them. All with various traditions and practices that would have been snuffed out under the Demons.
They carry out their demon-hunting duties with corvettes, which are usually attached to a larger battlegroup or mothership, and either attack swarms of Lessers or hunt down singular Corporeals. Aside from that, some operate without the aid of larger ships, penetrating deep into Domains as scouts.
Of the many species sighted on these 'Chthonaut' vessels, a large portion of them appear to be hairless mammalian bipeds. Intercepted communications have revealed that they call themselves, Humans.
They appear to have a history of fighting Demons, even before their spacefaring age. Sources vary from religious texts to fictional tales dating back multiple millennia of the Demons they have encountered, some exhibiting capabilities eerily similar to Arch Demons. Whether the events recounted are true to life remains to be seen, but the Humans of today undeniably match their written portrayals in terms of Demon-hunting prowess.
I do wonder though, how did they remain unconquered before their space age? Most species evolved in a Stellar Domain and the ones that didn't were absorbed all the same when they reached the Axiomatic population threshold that draws in Archs.
Perhaps there were other forces at play, mankind's old text did describe many entities besides Demons. From immortals that leeched the life force of their victims to beings completely antithetical to the concept of Demons. It wouldn't surprise me if these races potentially existed at one point, the intrusion of Chtho-Space did spell doom for the previous masters of this galaxy.
Strangely, while the monsters may differ, mankind is still shown to triumph over impossible odds in these ancient texts. It was a common message, no matter the language or culture, that the human spirit stands tall at the end. A naive proclamation, but one with more bite to it than it probably warrants.

Yo, back with another story after...idk after how many months, not really the one I've been spending months on making, but one that I've forced myself to write and finish,
Kinda makes me feel a bit sad, to be honest, I wonder how long stories would take to write when I actually have to work and go to college. I won't stop writing though, so don't worry about that. I wanna make a career out of this.
As always, criticism is welcome, and I do read your comments! just takes a while to respond because I post these stories when I am about to go to sleep or when I just wake up due to time zones.
Here's to hoping you'll enjoy it.

That’s all it was. A game.
Something my friends and I used to play during the summer when we had nothing better to do. I never expected that it would get so out of hand.
I never expected it to come back long after recovery.
To anyone reading, please don’t do what I did.
I’m putting this out there to warn people.
On that warm summer evening, we played the role of Pandora.
Except, the monsters we released were far worse than what’s told in stories.
Because stories end.
And this doesn’t.
I still remember the date. July 16, 2013. I was an upcoming senior in high school while the others were getting prepared for their freshman year of college, raving on about their majors, life plans, dorms, you get the point. The summer had been bittersweet as those months would be the last I’d see them for a while. Because of this, Anthony, Lola, Eliza, and I would spend the bulk of our time together going to festivals and various camping trips, trying to make the most out of the summer while we could. On that day, the day I wish I could forget, Eliza had run late to one of our hangouts at my place. This was odd since as an Ivy league student, she was usually early or right on time to these kind of things. Half past three, we heard her knocking on my door rapidly, which was also out of character considering that she was usually the calm one in our group. A bit worried, I hurried down the stairs with Anthony and Lola following close behind, expecting Eliza to be in hysterics due to her frantic behavior. When I opened the door, however, there she was with a bright smile on her face, her red hair getting in the way of her eyes, which were a dark green shade. She pushed her hair out of her face with one hand and held a brown box in the other, and she was bouncing up and down as she usually does when she’s about to talk about something exciting.
“You’ll never believe what I found.” Eliza’s voice could barely hold her impatience as she stepped inside and kicked her shoes off once she crossed over my threshold.
“What’s up with you today?” Anthony questioned, looking more confused than concerned now.
“I’ll show you guys in a minute. Can we go up to your room, Felix?” Eliza looked over at me with her trademark smile, knowing damn well we were all too curious to just leave that box unopened. Without a word, I led the group up to my room and shut the door after everyone had walked in. Anthony took his usual spot on my beanbag and unzipped his hoodie, which had the MSM logo sprawled across the front in big red letters. He adjusted his dark rimmed glasses and took on his usual stoic expression. Lola wore a dark blue FIT shirt, which she revealed more of when she moved her locs over her shoulder as she sat on my desk chair and wheeled over to us. As she did, the various necklaces she wore clinked against each other. Eliza herself was the smartest out of the group, and probably in the whole school as well. She had gotten accepted into multiple prestigious schools, but ultimately settled for Harvard to pursue a degree in some obscure philanthropic career. Unlike Anthony and Lola, Eliza wore her regular outfit –usually a white tank top and jeans– and sat on my bed with the box in her lap. I took a seat next to her to get a closer look.
“So what’d you find?” The others moved closer.
“Something we probably haven’t thought about for a really long time. Do you guys remember that one game we used to play in middle school? The one we made after Felix joined our class?” Eliza looked at our puzzled faces to see if we had connected the dots, but her clue didn’t seem to strike any of us with familiarity.
“After Felix joined? Didn’t we just hang out or something that weekend?” Anthony questioned.
“We did, but there was something else,” Eliza raised an eyebrow, “you guys seriously don’t remember?”
At that moment, I saw Lola’s eyes light up and a thin smile grew on her lips, something she always did whenever she was able to figure something out.
“You mean that little map game we played? Where we would go out to the woods and explore?”
Both Anthony and I seemed to have remembered as well with the mention of a ‘map game.’ I chimed in, “ yeah I remember! Every once in a while when we were all bored, we’d pick a random spot on a map to go to and explore there for a bit, right? When did we stop doing that anyways? I remember really enjoying it.”
“Well life happens,” Eliza responded to me, “but I was thinking of things to do for the rest of the summer when I suddenly remembered that game! That’s why I was so late for our meetup today, I was looking through my attic for this.” Eliza shook the box slightly and a couple things clattered around inside.
“There’s no way.” Anthony sounded like he was in disbelief.
“You mean…?” Lola sat forward in the chair. Eliza smirked, her adventurous nature creeping out as realization swept over us like a wave.
“Mhm! I found the map we used to use as well as the things we collected from our little escapades.” With that, Eliza opened the box, revealing a folded piece of paper and various trinkets scattered over the bottom of the capsule. Lola squealed with excitement and immediately snatched the box from Eliza, who simply chuckled and leaned back on the bed.
“No way! Everything’s still in here!” Lola digged through the box and placed whatever objects she found across the blanket. Anthony got up and sat at the foot of my bed, to observe our findings more closely. There was a piece of some clay pottery, some rusty springs and scraps of metal, an old digital camera, and some other random stuff I can’t recall to memory right now. Anthony picked up a spring and turned it in his palm.
“Shit man, this is from that abandoned junkyard we found in 8th grade…that feels like such a long time ago now.”
I examined the piece of pottery with Eliza looking over my shoulder. Lola picked up the digital camera.
“Do you remember where this came from?” I turned to Eliza and held up my discovery.
“No clue,” she shrugged. It must have been a while ago if even she didn’t remember. I turned the piece over and grew curious when I saw weird symbols inscribed on the inside of it. I squinted a bit, trying to discern some sort of pattern within the scribbles.
I turned to Eliza again, “hey, what do you think-”
“OH MY GOD GUYS IT STILL WORKS!” Lola’s voice went up a whole octave as she motioned to us.
The rest of us looked up as she turned the camera to face us. There were various photos we went through. All of us at lakes, museums, exploring the woods; everything we did from 7th grade until my freshman year seemed to be documented. The last photo was arguable the best and msot bittersweet. It was a picture of the whole group from a while ago. We were sitting at Eliza’s dinner table with a giant chocolate cake on the middle of it adorned with two candles shaped like the numbers one and five. Eliza was talking to me in the photo. Her hair was even more red at the time and she wore it in a braid. I looked about the same in the photo as I did then, with light brown hair, blue eyes, and freckles scattered all over my body and face. I was smiling sheepishly at Eliza. I now knew why Anthony said it was obvious I had a crush on her in 8th grade. Lola went through the most changes out of all of us. At the time in the photo, she had her hair straightened and side-swept, with a bright pink streak in her bangs. She wore clunky jewlery and a frilly skirt underneath a long tank top, leaning over the table to cut another slice of cake. All of us had birthday hats on except for Anthony, who kept his sitting on the table. He held up a peace sign staring straight into the camera with a stoic expression. He looked like a statue compared to the rest of us, who were laughing and smiling. You could tell he was having fun, though.
“Well don’t you look like a ray of sunshine,” Lola snickered as Anthony shot her a dirty look.
“At least I didn’t go through some weird scene phase in freshman year,” He smiled and watched Lola’s face, knowing she was blushing despite her dark skin which made it practically invisible. I let a laugh slip out, but quickly stifled it knowing that if I kept going it would mean death. Lola side-eyed me and continued, “I was using my creative liberty to experiment with my options as an artist,” she said with an overly-posh accent that made Eliza laugh.
“Yeah Anthony, don’t be such a downer,” Eliza teased. Anthony simply rolled his eyes and suppressed a smile to pretend like he was mad at all of us. He looked into the box and picked up the paper we left, unfolding it with a hint of excitement and curiosity. When he looked at it, only two words came out of his mouth.
“Holy shit.”
“What, what is it?” Lola tried to look at the other side of the paper, but Anthony quickly held it out of her view.
“What if I didn’t want to show you?” A smile crept onto his face. This was one of those rare moments where he’d be in the moos to joke around with us.
“Don’t be a dick bro,” I said, laughing as I went to grab for the paper. Anthony just held it up in the air and pushed me off of him and I landed on my floor. While he was distracted, though, Eliza took her chance and snatched the paper right out of his hand.
“You boys need to learn to be nice,” she warned in her jokingly stern voice as she unfolded the paper and spread it out onto my bed. We all leaned over to look.
It was a map of a couple towns including ours. There were around ten small star stickers placed on different areas on the map near the streets the four of us lived in. On the top of the map, a couple words were scrawled in black sharpie; “Pick a Place!” I could see everyone’s faces light up.
“Oh my god it’s our map!” Lola shouted and pointed to one of the stars near her street, “this was where we found that old junkyard right?”
Eliza smiled, “I remember that. It feels like such a long time ago now.” She pointed to another star, “and this is where we found that lake we made a hideout of. I still remember swimming in there in 8th grade…”
The four of us reminisced for a while, talking about where we had gone and what we did there, and how impressive it was that we didn’t get tetanus from that junkyard. After nearly an hour of conversation, Eliza asked something that made all of us stop.
“So how about it guys? Do you want to do one last round before the summer ends?”
The rest of us looked around at each other. It was clear we all wanted to do it. Eliza seemed to catch on and she nodded.
“Who wants to pick where we go?”
“How about you do the honors?” Lola suggested, motioning towards the map. “You’re the one that brought this stuff in anyways.”
Eliza raised her eyebrow but didn’t object. Without a word, she examined the map for a few minutes, then placed her finger on one spot a bit far from my house.
“How about here?”
“You think we can make it that far?” Anthony asked.
“Well, we can drive now so why not?”
“You sure there’s some type of trail we can drive on? That spot looks pretty deep in the woods”
“We can find a path to drive on for a bit then walk the rest of the way. C’mon guys, this is probably our last chance to do something like this! Felix, you can drive right?”
Eliza and the rest turned to me with a hopeful expression. I had to comply.
“Sure. No big deal, right?”
All three of them cheered and high fived each other, looking pretty excited to go on one last adventure.
“So when do we leave?” I questioned.
Eliza flashed that smile again, “right now.”
“Right now?!”
“Hell yeah,” Lola chimed in. “It shouldn’t take that long, right?”
“I guess…” Even then I felt uneasy about the whole thing. I didn’t feel prepared enough to go on some random trip into the woods. I needed to pack food, water, flashlights, I had no idea how long this was going to take. Little did I know that those things would be the least of my worries a couple hours from then. I wish I could go back and convince my 17-year-old self that it wasn’t worth it, that I should just convince my friends to stay and talk for the rest of the day. I wish Eliza had never remembered that stupid game. In a way, I’m almost mad at her for what happened, but I know it wasn’t anyones fault. We just wanted to have fun. I wish we could’ve just had fun. But God had a different plan for us. One that made me think Satan himself devised it instead. On July 16, 2013, Anthony He, Lola Smith, Eliza Landserson, and Felix Johanson went on an adventure that none of them were ready for.
Author's Note:
If you just read all of that then thank you so so so much for doing so! I'm a rookie writer, so feel free to comment any constructive criticism you might have if you have actual writing experience! This is the first silly little story I'm posting here, so I hope you enjoyed :)

In hindsight, I should have known something was wrong with The Caeles Academy of Acting.
Maybe the fact that it doesn't exist to the outside world.
This place prided itself on famous alumni it didn't actually name, and a once in a lifetime opportunity to work with the best in the business.
It's what I wanted.
More than anything.
After enduring four years of high school with barely a semblance of a drama club (we met every month, and our teacher was an alcoholic), and countless failed auditions, I was ready to take my acting career seriously. I had one year.
According to my parents, I had one year to make a living from my passion.
If it didn't work out, I would be on the first plane back to Connecticut.
It's not like they didn't trust me. I think they were just scared I wouldn't be able to financially support myself. So, I got a job right out of high school and slipped a year. Drama schools are expensive, and college’s are cut-throat on who they take on. I found Caeles Academy by accident–or, I guess it found me?
After researching cheap drama classes, auditions, academy’s, literally anything to progress my career, an ad popped up.
Not exactly flashy.
Just a date, a time, and a promise that they only take the best. I ignored it, but throughout the week, I started getting more ads. Just the words, “IMPRESS US - - JOIN CAELES ACADEMY NOW.”
Followed by, “BE WITH THE BEST, AND BE THE BEST. JOIN THE S CLASS NOW.”
When I googled the academy, nothing came up.
It didn't exist, at least on Google.
So, I gave up, clicking on the ad, which sent me straight to an application form.
I filled in my details as more of a joke. But I wasn't expecting to get an email back. Again, it was a time, a date, and that exact same tagline: “Impress us.”
However, Caeles Academy was different from what I imagined.
I was expecting a university building, or at least some modern structure.
Judging from their marketing and ads, I figured they could at least afford decent premises. Though I was mistaken. When I stepped out of the Uber, I found myself staring at what looked like an abandoned office tower, a red-brick monolith in the middle of nowhere.
Which was crazy, because I swore a girl wearing a bikini had strode through the doors, with nothing but her phone, and a coffee tucked under her elbow.
According to the text sent from the academy, the auditioning rooms were on the third floor.
Tipping my head back, the checkerboard of broken windows didn't exactly instil confidence.
Neither did the clunky set of automatic doors that took a while to open.
It was a summer's day, and the heat was already baking through my dress, sweat sticky on the back of my neck.
I wanted to make a good impression, but the heels were a little over the top.
Though I had also seen a girl casually walk in wearing a two piece bikini.
“Well?”
Freddie’s voice made me jump. I forgot I was on the phone to him.
After being excited the whole car-ride, already high on five coffees, I was silent.
If I perceived the ‘academy’ from an objective standpoint, it definitely looked like the perfect place to be brutally murdered. But my own personal opinion was it was.. okay.
“What's it like?”
I pretended not to see a rat scuttling under an old candy wrapper.
“It's… fine.”
“Just fine?”
I could hear the smirk in my friend’s tone. He couldn't wait to tell me it was a scam, and had been reminding me all week I was essentially willingly selling myself to the black market. I was stubborn, so, fine sounded better than my initial first impression.
Which was to turn around, walk away, and completely block the place from my memory.
Unfortunately, at that moment, I valued my pride over my awareness.
“It's… okay.” I said, trying to find positives. I was staring at a looming grey building with shattered windows and a resident rat living near the door.
I had a hard time figuring out how the girl from earlier had just casually strode inside, barefoot too. I glanced down at the ground, immediately regretting it.
Like there weren't bits of chewing gum and grime stuck to the concrete.
“Huh.” Freddie said, his tone creeping into teasing territory. “You're really selling it.”
“It just looks like a building,” I muttered, my gaze glued to the rat, who looked a little too comfortable.
Maybe it was a pet.
I was getting progressively more infuriated the more I stared down this place. Judging from the decades old writing ingrained into the door, it used to be a dentist surgery. “What do you want me to say?” I wasn't even trying to hide the scorn from my voice. “It's a building that looks like an academy.”
“Can you send a picture?” Freddie asked, “Ooh, wait, I'll face-time you.”
“That's, uh, that’s not really necessary–”
I was cut off, suddenly, when a guy threw himself through the automatic doors, palms first. He took two stumbled steps forwards, one back.
Lifting his head, half lidded eyes found the sky, before he dropped to his knees, heaving pinkish liquid.
I could see him trying to hold it in, slamming his hands over his mouth, only for it to splurge through his fingers, showering the ground in greyish pink froth.
Like he'd downed a bottle of Pepto Bismol.
Inching towards him, I realized it was Pepto Bismol.
The stink made my own stomach churn.
“Missy?”
I found my voice. “Uh, can I call you back later?”
Before my friend could answer, I ended the call, slipping my phone in my pocket.
The guy was still heaving, coughing up globules of pink.
“Are you okay?”
The sound of my heels click-clacking on concrete made me cringe. The guy noticed, flinching away. Closer, and I could see his scraggly blonde hair.
He was handsome.
Without the bile spewing down his chin.
Early twenties, wearing a fitted white shirt now covered in streaks of bright pink. Part of me wanted to make a half-hearted joke, but getting even closer, so close I could smell his pepto-breath, I noticed he was trembling, his hands clenched into fists.
When I attempted to awkwardly pat him on the shoulder, he twisted around, so fast my morning coffee slithered its way back up my throat.
His eyes were wide, almost feral, studying me like a wild animal.
I noticed the whites of his pupils were red, like he'd burst a blood vessel.
Theatre kids were intense, though I had never met THIS kind of intense.
“Are you… going in there?” The guy’s voice was a child-like whimper I wasn't expecting.
It looked like he was slowly regaining clarity, staring down at his filthy shirt, his hands stained bright pink.
I nodded, uncertainly, offering him my water. “Yeah. Did you audition?”
He shoved it away, slapping himself in the face. “I… I don't know.”
“You… don’t know?”
Suddenly, it was like something had contorted in his expression, a switch being pulled. I wasn't expecting him to twist around so fast. The guy slowly cocked his head, his lips breaking into a grin. His eyes, however, stayed the same.
“Of course I've auditioned.” He said, with a laugh.
“It was the best experience of my life!" His mouth formed an almost mocking frown.
“Unfortunately, I didn't make the cut. Which is a real shame. I'm sure Caeles would have benefited from my talents.”
What was weird, is that his mouth was moving, but he wasn't even looking at me, frenzied eyes caught in an oblivion I couldn't see.
When he did look at me, his expression crumpled all over again.
Pepto jumped to his feet, brushing himself down.
I couldn't take his over the top smile seriously, when his eyes were screaming, hollowed out caverns silently begging me to listen.
This guy was fucking crazy.
“Wait.” Pepto whispered, when I turned to walk away.
He pulled out his phone, tapping the screen before shoving it in my face.
I HAD SO MUCH FUN AT THE CAELES ACADEMY AUDITIONS :)
When I could only stare at him in confusion, Pepto’s gaze flicked to his phone, swiping bile from his lips.
His eyes went cartoon wide, like he couldn't believe what he himself was typing.
“That… that's not what I was trying to say!” He tried retyping it, but the guy was just writing strings of emoji hearts.
I didn't know what to say. I had dealt with rejection before, but I had never gone this far. Pepto was having a full on mental breakdown, his body shuddering, teeth chattering, blinking eyes and lips parting as if to speak, but choking on his words. When he started clawing out his hair, I took the opportunity to make a quick getaway.
Before I could make it to the doors, though, Pepto jumped in front of me, waving his phone directly in my face.
“Just…” he pointed at the screen. “It won't let me…” Growing frustrated with himself, he let out a wet sounding sob, clawing his fingers through his hair.
“Fuck, it won't let me…it won't let me type! It's not letting me type!”
By now, he had tufts of hair stuck between his fingernails. I don't know why his first reaction was to immediately try ripping his hair out.
A quick glance at my own phone reminded me of my audition that was in five minutes.
Meanwhile, I was dealing with what I was pretty sure was delusion, denial, or a mixture of both.
I was considering pushing past him, when Pepto’s phone screen hit me in the face. Again.
This time, though, there was coherent writing.
“FIND LUKE.”
“Luke?” I said. “Who's that?”
“Luke!” The guy was bouncing on the heels of his feet. “He's my…” Pepto drifted off, his eyes going vacant, as if I could physically see his brain being plucked from his skull. Pepto dropped his phone, and I grabbed it before it could hit the ground. His hands went to his curls, clawing, scratching, until he was drawing blood across his forehead.
“I… I don't know! I can't… I can't remember. Luke. He was my… he was my… I don't know, I can't… I can't–”
I stumbled back when he let out a shriek, scratching at his face.
“Fuck!” He whimpered. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!”
Pepto grabbed my shoulders, shaking me, his fingers digging into my skin.
“I don't know who he is.” He gritted out, pink froth pooling from his lips.
Pepto broke out into a sob. “I don't… I don't know who he is, but you can find him, right? You can… you can find…”
Again, he trailed off mid sentence, his hands going limp around my shoulders.
I managed to side step him, swallowing a cry.
“Yeah, I'll, um, I'll find him for you.”
Pepto backed away, suddenly, stumbling over himself.
His gaze found mine, vacant, like a baby deer.
“Find who?”
I didn't wait around to answer him, pushing through the doors and stepping inside.
The interior was unsurprisingly even worse than the exterior.
The elevator was broken, so I had to run up three flights of stairs.
I expected at least an attempt at an academy, even in the dregs of an old dentist surgery.
What I got, though, was a never ending staircase, obnoxious photos of teeth greeting me on every level.
The third floor was… less clinical.
I strode directly into a waiting room filled with college aged students, either sitting on plastic chairs, or standing around, rehearsing.
The room itself was cosy enough, a navy carpet and a TV playing a random Twitch stream.
Situated in the middle was a desk with a bored looking woman behind it.
Her smile was fake. I could understand her pain. She was stuck in a room with theatre kids all day.
“Sign here.” She prodded a sheet of paper.
I was convinced her voice was AI.
While I was scribbling my details, I took a moment to notice the stark difference from the kids entering the room, to the ones leaving. The kids entering wore wide, confident smiles and were social butterflies, chatting amongst themselves.
The kids leaving reminded me of pod people.
They left the room silent, in an orderly line with dazed smiles on their faces, like they weren't sure where they were.
I watched one guy walk directly into the wall instead of taking a left toward the exit, and a girl straight up just toppled down the stairs.
The kids waiting with me named them rejects.
I wasn't convinced until I glimpsed an empty bottle of Pepto Bismol sitting on the floor by the window.
Thinking back to Pepto, that made a lot of sense.
I was still dazedly staring at the bottle, when my name was called.
Jumping to my feet, I did my best to calm myself down, straightening my ponytail. Pepto had really screwed with my head. I could barely even remember the lines I had been rehearsing for a week straight.
I was muttering my lines to myself, when I stepped through the door.
The door that apparently turned you into a pod-person on the way out.
For a moment, I thought I was blinded by stage lights.
It was so bright.
The glow bathing me was clinical, stabbing into my eyes.
When I blinked, I found myself standing in front of three shadows sitting in front of me.
Their chairs were made of leather, far different from the plastic ones in the waiting room.
So, they did have filthy cash.
I was looking at one man, and two women.
They were… average?
I expected them to be more glitzier, but they were just regular people.
The man was in his late twenties, maybe early thirties, a stiff looking brunette wearing a suit and tie, one leg crossed over the other. His eyes were narrowed slightly, lips curved into the start of a smile. Like I amused him.
The women were polar opposites.
One of them was my Mom’s age, grey hair and floral clothing. She took a sip of water, her gaze burning into me.
Google told me not to be intimidated by their stares, but it was impossible.
These people were carving holes into my skull.
Sitting next to her, a younger girl who seemed to own the color red.
Her hair simmered, blood red, while she herself was sculpted in a dress, perfect cherry lips spread in a wide smile.
With a little too many teeth.
They studied my face like I was already theirs, drinking in every inch of me.
Freddie said I had to find a weakness in their expression and use it to my advantage.
If I could find the prick of a genuine smile, I could become their favorite.
“Hi!” I said. My caffeine intake was starting to take effect.
I didn't realize I was bouncing up and down until I caught myself.
Red’s smile stretched wider.
Maybe they liked my eagerness.
“My name is Misa.” I introduced myself, staying casual, keeping my arms by my sides. “I'm twenty one years old–”
I choked on my next words when Red spoke up. “Impress us, Misa,” Her voice was a smooth, almost seductive rasp, and I felt myself fall into it, enveloped in sugar that was too sweet, and yet I couldn't stop myself. She folded her arms across her chest, her gaze challenging me to do something different. To make her want me.
“Show us something we have never seen before.” She stood up, cat-like eyes narrowing, “Show us how desperate you are to join this prestigious class.”
I nodded, and began.
I had planned a whole monologue, practised it over and over again, forcing Freddie to judge me with a none biassed opinion.
I was three lines in, when Red started laughing.
“Stop.”
I did, my cheeks heating up.
She clapped loudly. Obnoxiously.
“Sweetie, oh, stop, you're adorable!”
She leaned forward, like I was something that entertained her, jostling her heeled foot. “We don't take amateurs. I think you need to go back to school.”
This woman was definitely a psychopath.
Empty eyes sparkling with a gleam that definitely enjoyed humiliating candidates, and a twisted smile that was a little too wide. Red made me want to crawl into the ground.
She made me want to turn around, leave the room, and quit my dream. I was aware of my own fury, my embarrassment turning my cheeks crimson. I matched her.
Maybe that's what she wanted all along. To wear the color of her victims.
Taking a shaky step back, I started to nod, started to agree, my mouth choking with the words, “You're right. I'm sorry for wasting your time."
I had never received proper constructive criticism from a professional standpoint.
Which meant I really did suck.
But I didn't move. I didn't want to move, and Red continued laughing, her companions sitting in silence.
The man rolled his eyes with a loud, exaggerated sigh.
Like I was boring.
The older woman pulled out her phone.
“Misa, you are…cute.” Red said. “But you're not quite what we are looking for.”
I wasn't sure I could admit it right there, but she made me feel things.
Like I was ignited.
Like I was going to prove this crazy bitch wrong.
I found my voice, strong and confident, despite my hammering heart.
“Give me another chance.”
Red’s lips curled. “So cute, Misa. Oh, sugar bear, It would be better if you left the room. Unless you want to embarrass yourself further! In that case, be my guest!”
She turned her attention to her nails, nudging the guy.
“Dinner?” She hummed. “I'm thinking of Italian. You are quite the wine connoisseur, Nicholas. Why don't you introduce me to your favorite?”
“Hey.” I blurted.
They ignored me, getting a little too close.
I don't know why I continued, reading my lines, screaming them, so I would be heard. I read them perfectly, and tweaked the genre from drama to romance, and then to horror. I became three different characters, a high school girl struggling with cancer, a final girl, and a woman going through a divorce.
I was fucking perfect.
But they weren't listening to me, caught up in their own conversation.
I tried again.
And again.
And again.
By now, I was on my knees, my fingers ripping into my hair. I was seeing red.
“We want originality, Misa,” Red said, sucking her teeth.
Her voice crawling into my skull was enough.
She still wanted me.
The thought polluted the back of my mind, taking a strangling hold. She still wanted me. When I lifted my head, Red wasn't looking at me, her gaze on the table grains. “Show us something new.”
I got to my feet, panting, my breath in my throat.
I became a screaming, strangled mess, a woman who lost her baby.
Red’s interest was piqued. Only slightly. Through my fraying vision, she slowly turned in her chair. “Again.” She clapped her hands, “Come on, Misa! We want new! We want never been fucking done before! Are you deaf?”
I couldn't stop the sobs escaping my mouth.
They lost interest again, right in the middle of my reading.
“Why can't you look at me?” I found myself spluttering.
When the man pulled out a bottle of water, I yanked off my heel and lobbed it at his face.
“Look at me!”
He did. Slowly. His gaze found me, for perhaps the first time.
Not as an amateur, but as a potential candidate.
Around the twentieth attempt, I started to laugh. Never been done before? I could feel my fingernails already in my scalp, clawing chunks of my hair out.
Reality contorted, and I felt myself drop to my knees. I was still laughing, spluttering, sobbing. I could still hear her in my head. Never Been Done Before. I started slowly, dragging my fingernails down my face until I felt the harsh sting.
“Again.” Red said, and her voice led me to stare down at my hands, at pinkish flesh glued to my bones, fleshy mounds that I had never realized was so thin.
So easy to tear. I didn't even feel it.
Only the sudden, unbridled euphoria of biting into my own skin, locking in my jaw, and ripping into myself.
When I tore it from the bone, warmth filled my mouth, and I was choking, guzzling down my own flesh, mulling it in my mouth and swallowing.
I can't remember how I got so deep, and why I didn't stop.
Why I didn't fucking scream.
But it didn't matter.
Red was standing up. She was clapping, her lips spread into a grin.
Her applause filled me with stars.
So, I ripped my hair from my scalp, a hysterical giggle escaping my lips.
She loved me.
I could see her jumping up and down, clapping.
Louder, and louder.
Her applause controlled me, twisting and contorting me into hers.
I didn't even think. I wanted to impress her, and doing this was doing just that.
My fingers were delving into my right eye socket, clawing my eye out. It didn't even hurt. Not with her thundering applause that was deafening, beautiful, an orchestra in my ears.
When I was semi conscious, my eye was crushed in my hand, but my vision was still mine, almost too clear. I could see streaks of red blurred between my lashes. My hair was caught between my fingers. But I wanted to do more.
When I stumbled to my feet, Red’s smile was so beautiful.
The man, however, looked horrified.
“Someone grab one of the successes,” Red’s voice was a shrill giggle, “Bring him in!” she clapped her hands together, and I spat out a fleshy thing. “I want to see them together! I want to see the future in front of us!”
Footsteps coming towards me in slow, shuddery thumps. I looked up, and a shadow was dancing around me.
When I slowly rose to my feet, I half realized I’d bitten my toe off. The shadow had a face, a boy who was younger than me. I think he used to have hair, but half of it was gone, half of it was still stuck between his fists. When I found his eyes, I found twin caverns instead.
Eyes that were still physically there, and yet there was no life.
No spark.
I was staring at a dead body, a flesh puppet who had lost his strings.
When he grabbed my hands, pulling me into a waltz, I caught a smear of scarlet trickling down the back of his neck. When I followed it upwards, his head was covered, slick, dripping with red.
Like me, he matched her too.
And he was beautiful, she told me, her push, her thunderous applause, guiding me into a waltz.
His feet moved, perfecting every step, and my foggy mind couldn't understand why. He matched my every move, the two of us floating across the floor.
My feet knew the steps before my mind.
How could he dance? I thought, dizzily.
How could he dance, when smeared scarlet followed his twisting, and turning and pirouetting feet?
Because underneath that swimming clinical light, the back of the boy’s head had been carved away, a perfectly sculpted cavern where his brain should have been. I could see the severed stem, where it had cleanly plucked out.
His fingers cradled in mine were wet. Swimming in blood.
His own blood.
Spinning round and around, I imagined myself as a princess.
I saw an 18th century ballroom lit up around us. Glittering smiles and glasses of champagne, long, flowing ball gowns.
I blinked, and my head was tipped back, gliding in blood once again.
When he pulled me to his chest, I stumbled, and a name came to light.
Luke.
I had found him.
Our finishing spin left me hard to breathe.
My body was broken, ripped into, and yet somehow not.
By the time we were finished, the two of us bowing, my mind was full of fog.
Cotton candy.
“Congratulations!” Red’s smile was inhuman, stretching right off of her face.
“You're in the S class!”
I was led through a door that wasn't the one I entered from. Inside the room were a dozen or so students, kneeling on the floor. They were missing parts of themselves, like unfinished puzzle pieces.
I dropped onto my knees next to a girl without a head. I could only see her torso, but I knew she was smiling.
Looming over us, was the goddess Athena drenched in blood that was still wet.
Dripping, pooling from every crevice of her dress.
Looking closer, this statue was moving.
Something sickly crept into my mouth.
Her right eye was human, a twitching eyeball sandwiched inside the stone.
It didn't match her. It was wrong, horrifying, like a painting, a real human eye struggling to focus on us.
And then, my own gaze found the statues head, where a real human brain had been forced inside perfect white, pink, greyish mush dripping down the sculpted, slender neck.
I could see where it had been pushed, pulverised through the stone.
The statue’s singular eye found me.
Its dancing pupil jumped up and down.
Before it blinked.
Next to me, Luke was on his knees, as if in prayer.
I can't remember leaving the room.
I just remember running.
Back down the stairs, stumbling, staggering over myself.
I was screaming by the time I reached the doors.
They opened, as usual.
But I couldn't get through. I tried, but I was slamming into something I couldn't see.
Pepto was still waiting outside. The sky was dark.
When he saw me, he stumbled over, slamming his hands into the glass.
I couldn't even understand myself. I was just fucking screaming.
Pepto held up his phone.
“DID YOU FIND HIM?”
I shook my head.
“No.” I lied.
I can't tell him the truth. I don't even know what it is.
“I can't get out!”
Pepto nodded slowly, typing something and showing me his phone.
I'm getting you both out of there. I think I know how I can get inside.
It's been 3 days, and Pepto is yet to return.
I’ve tried multiple times to cry out for the H word. But it won't let me type it.
Please H me. I need to get out of this place.
Fuck. Get me OUT OF HERE.
Classes start tomorrow.