Part 1 about voter constituencies read here: https://www.reddit.com/unitedstatesofindia/s/wYsPUkrwok
So Part 2 - Here are VIP seats: 1. Varanasi - Modi is winning. No point discussing this further. The whole Shyam Rangeela thing was sad. Modi wins anyway. 2. Mathura - Hema Malini as a politician is a clown. People will still vote for her. Because she is famous, she is 'dream girl'. Vote for her is BJP vote, it's a vote for Modi. 3. Gorakhpur - Ravi Kishan will win. Bhojpuri ka SRK. He seems like a decent person in public life. But also is apparently proper RW in personal life. BJP seat hai, jeetenge hi. 4. Meerut - Arun Govil. Kya aap Ram Rajya mai Shri Ram ko vote nahi denge. He is the actor who played Ram in the Doordarshan Ramayan. Recently played Modi-look-alike character in Article 370. Is an absolute clowns. Actually gave interviews saying that I don't know what the issues of Meerut are. Said - "I will work to find out issues after I win election." Most likely will still win, people will vote Ram ke Naam. 5. Ghaziabad - Atul Garg. Son of the first mayor of Ghaziabad. Currently a minister in Yogi sarkar. Will ride the Modi-Yogi wave and win. 6. Pilibhit - Nitin Prasada. Was a congress MP from Shahjahanpur way back in 2004 and Daurahara in 2009. Made MoS in UPA2. Joined BJP in 2021. Will win due to Modi wave mostly. But voter may have resentment coz BJP did not give ticket to Varun Gandhi. 7. Saharanpur - Imran Masood, son of 9-time MP Rashid Masood. Congress candidate. Hoping that father's base plus undercurrent will help. Muslims have decent share in constituency. Shayad jeet jayega. 8. Mainpuri - Dimple Yadav. Wife of Akhilesh Yadav. Bhabhi ji jeet jayegi. UP government tourism minister standing against her. Double engine sarkar influence. But she seems to be too big to lose in this seat bcoz Mainpuri is Mulayam Singh Yadav's bastion. 9. Firozabad - Akshaya Yadav, related to the SP yadav family. Seat is SP bastion won by them everytime since 1999 to 2014. Lost in 2019. SP looking to get it back. 10. Budaun - Aditya Yadav, related to the SP yadav family. Seat is SP bastion won by them everytime since 1996 to 2014. Lost in 2019. SP looking to get it back. 11. Agra - SP Baghel, Union Minister will fight this SC reserved seat. BJP has been winning this seat since 2009. Will win again this year. 12. Hathras - SC reserved seat. BJP union minister fighting here mainly against SP candidate. Toss up seat as Hathras rape case is very big issue among other issues affecting backward castes. 13. Etah - Rajveer Singh, son of former UP CM Kalyan Singh. Seat is family bastion plus he is BJP candidate. Will definitely win. 14. Kannauj - Akhilesh Yadav. Bhaiya toh jeetenge. He has won from here before. 15. Unnao - Sakshi Maharaj. Controversial person but will win Ram ke Naam. Important seat placed right between Lucknow and Kanpur. 16. Amethi - Smriti Irani vs KL Sharma is gonna be a fun toss up to watch. Irani has BJP + Modi/Yogi/Ram in her favour but people are annoyed by her lies about cylinder and 13Rs sugar. Local village Pradhans are annoyed at how she has allegedly micro-managed and also disrespected them in the last 5yrs. KL Sharma is not a big name but he has been there for 40+yrs as poll manager. Generations of people in Amethi know him personally. And Priyanka Gandhi has also done a great job campaigning for him. Toss up seat, fun to watch. 17. Raebareli - Rahul Gandhi. He is running from here coz it's going to be a safe seat. Family bastion hai. Priyanka has campaigned really well and after the "Mai aapko apna beta saup rahi hu" speech by Sonia Gandhi, it seems like a sealed deal. 18. Lucknow - Rajnath Singh. BJP stronghold since 1991. Atal Bihari Vajpayee's seat. Rajnath Singh running from here for the 3rd time. He'll win for sure. 19. Kaiserganj - Karan Bhushan Singh, son of Brij Bhushan Singh. Dab dabba toh hai. Betaji jeet hi jayenga. Father's sexual harassment scandal not a voter issue at all unfortunately. 20. Sultanpur - Maneka Gandhi. Will win. Loved by voters. Did a lot of work at village level outside of her MP duties as well. 21. Azamgarh - Nirahua (Bhojpuri superstar) vs Dharmendra Yadav (SP yadav family). SP bastion but Nirahua wrestled the seat in 2022 by-poll. Toss up seat worth watching. 22. Ambedkarnagar - No famous players but seat to look for. Strong fight between BSP and BJP. Mayawati won from here two times. Birthplace of social leader Ram Manohar Lohia. Large vote share of Dalits, Kurmis and Muslims. 23. Shravasti - Saket Mishra. Son of Modi's ex-principal secretary (the guy who is now chairman of ram mandir construction committee). He will win ofcourse. Modi/Yogi + Ram is enough. 24. Ghazipur - Afzal Ansari, elder brother of Mukhtar Ansari running on SP ticket. Let's see how much his death's sympathy factor works with largely Muslim voter base. 25. Mirzapur - Anupriya Patel, chief of Apna Dal and Union Minister in current central government. 2 time incumbent, trying luck third time, might win. 26. Ballia - Neeraj Shekhar, son of former PM Chandra Shekhar. Running on BJP ticket, will win.
Ho gaya ji. 26 out 80 seats. Baaki seats ka zyada knowledge nahi hai. Aur Maine find out karne ki mehnat nahi ki hai. Udti udti khabar Sunni hai that unexpected seats like Faizabad (ayodhya) and Lucknow might see a turn around. But mujhe abhi toh believe nahi ho raha.
What I think are confirm wins: 15 NDA alliance (14 BJP + 1 Apna Dal) 6 INDIA alliance (2 Congress + 4 SP)
Toss up seats with battles to watch for: Hathras Amethi Azamgarh Ambedkarnagar Ghazipur
Thanks friends. Byeeeee

I have a Guardian 16kw whole house generator. I went out to check it today and noticed the display was showing the following string of characters: RTD2"D" " " " " " " " " " " "%DD. Pressing Off and then the arrow keys doesn't change anything on the display. Not sure how long it's been like this but it was able to run it's self test yesterday and the Auto button works as expected. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Would doing a hard reset be worthwhile or is it time to get it serviced?
Thanks!

I’ve been observing some of the behaviors of my deathclaw, and I noticed that ,while it has plenty of room to wander around my camp, it likes to hang around my Camp module. I plan on doing some testing to see if he’ll move to a different part of my camp if I move the module, but I wanted to ask if anyone noticed or knows of any other quirks or mechanics of tamed creatures that they noticed. Also, I’m wanting to try and tame a stronger deathclaw, preferably a Glowing Deathclaw that’s at least level 100. I know this would be difficult to find, but I’ve already had one Deathclaw die to a Super Mutant attack on my camp and a second one die to a hoard of Feral Ghouls that attacked it when it tried to make its way to my camp (the encounter position had it right next to a known ghoul hoard spawn location next to the Whitesprings, so there wasn’t much I could do about it). Does anyone know of locations that can reliably spawn glowing Deathclaws that I can check. I know that creature variants can be influenced by their location, but I just don’t know exactly where to look for the glowing variant. Any relevant help on these topics is appreciated.

I have upgraded to the google wifi pro system at my home. I have been using the previous iteration google wifi and it still functions well. If I have the network name and SSID password for someone elses existing network and have access to their google home app, can I set up the previous generation system (router and 3 repeaters) on my network with that network name and SSID PW at my home for configuration and testing, then just plug it in at the desired location with no additional setup needed?

TL:DR
Some parts of the text was in Reddit-tables, but they got somehow lost.
This project began when someone on Reddit asked about the export speed of Rekordbox 7 compared to Rekordbox 6, prompting the entire initiative. My intention is not to "blame" or "shame" any company or its products. I approached these tests with an unbiased, open mind, taking great care to provide a level playing field for all tests conducted. This report reflects my impartial findings.
Test DateMay 16th - May 20th 2024 Report ReleaseMay 21st 2024 AuthorMixMasterG CompanyAnd The Groove Remains Production Team Websitewww.ATGR.nl
Publication of (sections) of this report is allowed, with full data source statement included.
Introduction:
Welcome to the real world Rekordbox 6/7 speed comparison test on macOS 2024.
When I began these tests, my initial goal was to quickly compare the speed difference between Rekordbox 6 and Rekordbox 7 on an Apple ARM computer for tasks that are notoriously slow, such as opening, exporting to USB, and analysis. I used my personal, extensive track collection for these tests. Due to unexpected results, I expanded the test to include several other macOS computers. As a reference, I decided to include Algoriddim djay Pro 5, the most optimized DJ software for macOS, and Serato, the second most popular DJ software on macOS.
Mandatory Rekordbox 7 analysis when exporting to USB
When I initiated the tests, the measured export times from Rekordbox 7 to USB were unreasonably long. Similar reports poured in from users of my applications in various settings. Identifying the cause of this sluggishness swiftly became my top priority. It turned out that Rekordbox 7's export process necessitated the analysis of tracks by RB7, even if those tracks were already fully analyzed in Rekordbox 6.8.5. When an artist updates from Rekordbox 6 to Rekordbox 7, RB7 silently analyzes the tracks before exporting, leading to excessively prolonged export times. Fortunately, RB7 analysis is a one-time requirement per track and can be manually initiated at times that its more convenient then minutes before a gig. I issued this short YouTube video to make users aware: Slow USB export from Rekordbox 7? This is why and how to fix!
I gave the full explanation and interpretation of the test results, together with performance tips in my weekly Ask Me Anything live stream for DJs, the video can be watched back here Ask Me Anything for DJs - Results of the Rekordbox 6 Vs Rekordbox 7 real world speed-test There is a time index in the first remark under the video.
All previous AMA livestreams, are available in this YouTube playlist: Ask Me Anything conversion & collection management for DJs past streams
The Test parameters:
Main collection managerMusic (the app formerly known as iTunes, will be referred to as iTunes) Total number of tracks in collection116.747 / 1.47 Tb Audio file formatMP3 preferred - 320 Kbs / 44.1 kHz / 16bit/CBR Location of audio filesexternal SSD, Samsung T7 2Tb / formatted macOS Extended Export driveexternal SSD, Samsung T7 2Tb each test run (FAT32 and HFS) started with a fresh formatted export drive Drive's connection to computeron all test systems USB-C
The software used:
Music (=iTunes)1.2.5 RB6Rekordbox 6.8.5 RB7Rekordbox 7.0 SeratoSerato 3.1.3 djaydjay Pro 5.1.7
Computer specifications
M1 = MacMini (2020) - M1 8 cores (4 efficiency 4 performance) - GPU 8 cores - RAM 8Gb - macOS Sonoma 14.4.1
i9 = Intel MacPro - i9 9900K u/3.6Ghz 8 cores - GPU AMD RX 580 8 Gb - RAM 16Gb - macOS Monterey 12.7.5
MBP = MacBookPro 14" (2021) - M1 8 cores (2 efficiency 6 performance) - GPU 14 cores - RAM 16Gb - macOS Monterey 12.7.1 because the similarity in times for Rekordbox 7.0 on the M1 and MBP, the Rekordbox 6.8.5 tests were skipped on the MBP.
Note: for the tasks that were tested, none of the DJ softwares utilizes the GPU
Test conditions
I aimed to standardize all test conditions as much as possible, including:

• Data for collection was stored on the internal drive, the audio files were stored on external storage.
• Each test used the exact same external drives, connected to the computer over USB-C, using the same cables.
• All collection data was identical across all systems, synchronized using Carbon Copy Cloner before the test.
• All computers were freshly rebooted prior to the test, with the "open windows from previous session" option disabled.
• No other applications were open besides an on-screen stopwatch.
• Wi-Fi was disabled, and network cables were disconnected.
• No screen capture applications were used; all video recording was done externally to avoid occupying system resources from the test.
• Between the various exports in a single test run, the export drive was not formatted (so each of the 3 exports added to the previous). Only after a full export run (sync1, sync2 and sync3) on a given computer, the drive was reformatted.
• The partitioning scheme used in both FAT32 and HFS (=macOS Extended journaled) was Master Boot Record.
• Analysis in Rekordbox was only performed for "Phrase" to maintain the converted Mixed in Key/Traktor values. Analysis requires at least one option to be checked, all other options (BPM/Grid, key etc) were disabled.
• In Serato DJ Pro analysis for BPM and Key were disabled
• In Rekordbox, the Sync Manager was enabled to synchronize all playlists from iTunes, ensuring the sync was up-to-date with no changes made to the iTunes collection during the test.
• All test playlists originate from iTunes and were accessed through the iTunes section of the DJ software.
• All (116.747) tracks from iTunes had been pre-analyzed in: Rekordbox 6, Serato, and djay Pro 5. In other words, the DJ software had a real and big collection of tracks. Since djay Pro 5 does not re-analyze already analyzed audio files, all djay analysis data was deleted from the system before running the analysis tests.
• Because iTunes sync can not be disabled in djay Pro, the values used for startup without iTunes are the same values from the test run with iTunes sync enabled.

Fault tolerance:
During computer speed testing, achieving 100% identical situations is unfeasible due to the unpredictable consumption of system resources by various OS-related operations. I estimate the fault tolerance in the measured times to be around 5%.
The iTunes playlist(folder) used for the tests:
Sync1
Playlist folderATGR Necessities Number of playlists in folder24 Total number of tracks 3823 / 45,93 Gb Export to USBSyncManager
Sync2
Flat playlist Top 40 2023 Total number of tracks 587 / 4,46 Gb Export to USBRight click playlist -> export
Sync3
Flat playlistTop 40 2024 Total number of tracks 283 / 2,17 Gb Export to USBRight click playlist -> export
https://preview.redd.it/hmajmvglru1d1.png?width=1497&format=png&auto=webp&s=108356518b3998c94ec848f07a78b545425b5d7f
https://preview.redd.it/eo3gvokqru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=4487f3193d07c5e98ff8a796cc56fc303042e58d
https://preview.redd.it/qzzzy78sru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=deffef82a834e3ad3ef13aa2a59bd705316a6ef1
https://preview.redd.it/hqed25ntru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=2fb3c7ba5283722e569a207d2faa242b3aa32e26
https://preview.redd.it/7ubiz7iuru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=2f2cb345cf718b30cd473cca3b9c1d8a33c714e1
https://preview.redd.it/zu5yiajvru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=df06eed0e2d8cea446469ed498cf32c341f064c7
https://preview.redd.it/mq1chq9wru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=cfa752e197d88b63bd6fbea2ff95f9b9b552cabc
https://preview.redd.it/7eu2rl1xru1d1.png?width=1400&format=png&auto=webp&s=863ce32b59be277fbc4a6d32b4b4cf90f8417213
Important conclusions and findings from these tests:

• Rekordbox 7 on macOS is not multithreading when it comes to analysis, hence the spikes in the tests. On Windows Rekordbox 7 utilizes all available CPU cores. Rekordbox 6.8.5 is also multithreading.
• Export to an HFS formatted USB is faster than a FAT32 formatted, especially after consecutive exports.
• Disabling iTunes integration in the SyncManager can improve startup times of Rekordbox considerably. Disabling iTunes sync can cause issues with exported USBs that were originally created using the SyncManager.
• Rekordbox 7 has a bug, where custom/edited BPM/Grids can be overwritten with mandatory analysis. Even when the BPM/Grid analysis is disabled!
• Export to USB using the SyncManager still shows 2 progress bars, where export through right click -> export only shows 1

(c) 2024 And The Groove Remains Production Team

I haven’t been fully confirmed with celiac yet but I’ve had troubles with going to the toilet and had blood tests to show my celiac levels are above average does anyone have any tips for like toilet troubles while I want for the proper results of my upper gastroal endoscopy(I don’t want to go into details on my toilet troubles on here in case someone without the stomach to handle what I say reads it)

I'm just looking to play with crunching the mic pre a little bit for saturation.
Trying to figure out what the best signal path is for getting the balanced line level through the pre. I'd like to avoid buying an attenuator to test it out if the options are the same.
The pre I'm using has onboard DI and the DI also loops into the input transformers.
Thanks!

I know reddit isn't the right place, but I am fully lost and hoping to find some help. 26F here.
Here is the whole timeline : Dec2023/jan 24 - took 2-3 planB's within weeks time
Dec 30 to Jan 3 - normal period
Jan 6th - plan B
Jan 10-13 - bleeding ( assumed it's from plan B)
Feb 1-5 : period
Entirety of Feb/ early March - abnormal discharge( no spotting)
March 3-6 : spotting/blood only when I wipe( pretty much a missed period)
April 10th : pap smea abnormal cells/ HPV
April 21st : mild spotting
April 24th : still spotting, colposcopy with Endocervical cutterage( sample was taken)- normal, got hpv vac first shot. No cervical biopsy- was told to repeat pap in a year
April 25 : started bleeding
April 29th : started having an eye swelling
May 1st : got a head CT( iodine stain), IV with cephalexin antibiotic May 1st - May 8th : was on antibiotics
May 15th : went to urgent care for abnormal bleeding( got a bunch of tests done) Thyroid is normal, low iron. Have BV and Yeast infection
May 16th : transvaginal ultrasound - nothing crazy concerning : clear cyst( maybe because of ovulation), thickened uterine lining( 10.5mm) - not concerning
I have been bleeding horribly for the past month. Passing lumps/blood clots, color went from brown to read and brown for the first few weeks and now it's bright red. Soaking up over night pads, every 3 hours. I am scared, tired and exhausted. I really don't know what's happening. I have an appointment in a day, but I am scared they'll say it happens and will brush me off😞 being an overthinker I am scared something is horribly wrong with me - went on different subreddits and I am totally freaked out..

pt is a 24 year old Black male, 6'3, 226lb, who does not smoke and only drinks occasionally. his only other known medical condition is eczema, which has been a lifelong problem for him. a recent testicular ultrasound revealed a 6mm cyst on the epididymal head of his left testis; there were no other findings of note.
on the 21st of february (2024), pt was exposed to a mystery STI from oral sex with another male [both giving and receiving if that's anything] that seems consistent with syphilis (a single painless spot on his pubic area, lasting about a week; a swollen lymph node in neck; itching, pain, and fissures around the anus; epididymitis; discomfort urinating). however, all syphilis RPR tests administered by his physicians have been negative. he has had four so far: one 8 days after exposure, one 14 days, another at 47, and a fourth at about 81. no other types of syphilis tests have been offered to him so far.
his urinalyses have returned fairly normal with the exception of his bilirubin levels, which have been steadily worsening since april (have slowly gone from 1.1 to 1.6 to 1.8 mg/dL since april 6th). he also consistently shows trace amounts of blood in his urine.
previous attempts to treat his condition with antibiotics (specifically doxycycline, azithromycin, and rocephin; at one point he was also prescribed cipro but that didn't seem to do much) have been successful at alleviating symptoms, but they have always returned within a week or two's time.
this morning, pt was complaining of upper right quadrant pain. the pain reportedly went away with water + a nap, but i'm still worried on his behalf, especially given the heightened bilirubin.
should i drag him to the ER for further evaluation just to be safe?? is there anything else we should be looking for in terms of causes of these symptoms?? thank you in advance for your advice. i've been running myself ragged trying to find a doctor irl whom he can afford + will take his concerns seriously.

I am on 10 years deferred in TX and just finished up a 3 year divorce last January. I am 3 years into the deferred sentence and never had an issue,a lot hours of community service is completed. All fines paid for, paid ahead in monthly fees etc. on cruise control basically at the lowest level classification as well. Never had a violation ever. My charge is aggravated though. My ex wife is super vindictive and we have kid together. She got a 10 year protective order put in place when I was in jail as well. I have never been in trouble in my life before this probation just as background information.
This leads me to my current situation to where I accidentally put in one of my messages the words “F U B” At the top and then proceeded with a lengthy message trying to get her to co-parent with me. How was it an accident you may wonder? Well I use my notes app on my phone to do a lot of things, one of those things is write down songs that I hear that I think are worth listening to again. Well there is a song by Wheeler Walker Jr. called “F U B” it’s a colorful but funny song, I wrote it down to later look up.
With that being said I also compose the messages I am going to send my Ex in the notes app as well. I accidentally went into that note and typed out my message about how I wish she would just bury the hatchet. I copied the note and posted it in the court monitored AppClose system we use. I didn’t realize until later that at the top it had that song name listed and then 3 spaces below that my paragraph was there. I immediately messaged her informing her of all this information that I am talking about as well as apologizing and letting her know it was not intended for her and it’s a song etc etc.
Well she decided to take that screenshot of it saying “F U B” and go to the police station and a judge issued a warrant for my arrest for violating the protective order based off of just that alone. I was arrested last Friday and bonded out Sunday. I haven’t informed my PO based on advice from a from an attorney, but I have not retained them yet. My questions are what is the likely hood what Texas will do, based off of experience the community has. Let me continue probation or throw me in prison. Just looking for possible outcomes here.

I see this time and again. Usually someone younger will claim they’re Xennial or even Gen X because “I grew up poor” or “I lived in a rural town”.
When did we start associating generations/cohorts with our parents bank accounts?
Anyone else find this an unusual, even uneasy, way to mark generations? It leaves the impression that the primary deciding factor in what cohort you belong to is based largely on the material things your parents could or could not afford.
When it comes to tech, isn’t the greatest factor more about what was widely available and normalized on a macro level? For example, in the US we collectively grew up when the Oregon Trail remake game was super popular in elementary/middle schools. Even if someone our age lived in a school system that couldn’t afford Apple IIs, that doesn’t mean that those kids are suddenly not Xennials.
Likewise someone born well away from the Gen X cutoff doesn’t magically become Gen X because their mom couldn’t afford to by a Nintendo, so they grew up with an old Atari. Why would this even matter, from a larger generation perspective?
It seems so much of this stuff is coming down to the toys that your parents (or guardians) could or couldn’t afford and that just seems…off to me.

24f i got my first yeast infection a month back and it was difficult, not fun.
Two weeks before my period I started having bleeding, light and for three days. Was worried it was implantation bleeding as there’s a possibility. I was a couple weeks healed by then.
I suddenly had 15 mins of excruciating level 8-9 pain in my abdomen that came and went and never came back. Was so painful it was hard to breathe, reminded me of my pain waking up from surgery and from the time they did an ultrasound on my gangrene appendix. Sucked ass.
But that stopped too and I was like okay well yeah I’m probably pregnant this time - which would’ve been wonderful any other time leading up to this month, but my spouse has turned on me and become abusive and so suddenly the “not planning specifically but not being careful cos we’re ready at any point” turned into a lot of fear. I am with family right now. So obvs not on the pill but getting back on that regardless of my situation, cos it helps my hormones not be wack.
It’s two weeks since the bleeding and I have my normal period on schedule, day five. But I’ve had extremely foul smells and fishy and I don’t understand why. Less than 24 hours and no exercise and I just smell. My pad had smelled like straight death and rotten. It wasn’t too old or overused. Tried a tampon, that was bad too.
I have a feeling I might have tissue that’s having a hard time passing; I’ve had decidual cast before and wonder if maybe that’s what’s up.
I’ve taken a pregnancy test and confirmed not pregnant thankfully, this is definitely a period and not some other random bleeding again. But super confused. I feel a bit embarrassed about controlling the smell, feel like going to have to shower a couple times a day. I have never had issues with smell up until that yeast infection. But my discharge is normal and no itchiness anymore.

M21 I'm doubting if it was strict parenting or if it was the drink but I want opinions. She has done a lot but I don't feel entirely satisfied either. But in the days I have drafted this, my doubts only grow.
As a kid my mom hawked over me and now things I wish I could have experienced did not exist, like going to a park or playground with a friend without supervision, whereas she did. Going to the gas station for snack I couldn't, when she asked her parents and was given a quarter when everything was a cent. Riding a bike was limited to the street we live on, and when I was able to leave, I couldn't leave the neighborhood when she walked for a while to make sure her friend got home. Once sitting on my bike at the edge of the sidewalk and she walked over, cursed me out for going on a different street and wouldn't believe me. I couldn't go to a friends house because I was going to do my homework how my teacher taught me instead of hers, which I didnt know and was not taught. At a friends house, she berated me for making her wait in the car for a few minutes longer than the arranged pickup time. By comparison to what it would have been like, it is a magical opportunity lost.
For most of my school years, all I did was go to school, do homework and play games. Despite catching on to lessons quickly, classes were something to pass, nothing more, not even for life skills. Have a B? Make it an A. I did. Is the project due? Make it better. Alright. Taking orchestra and painting was fleeting then and while I enjoyed it, it was only done for practice or assignment. Now I am upset that it was all I did instead of going out and experiencing life: going out with friends, finding a club or sport to do, or just big activity sessions. Never had a curfew because I never left home to start. I may have had fun gaming then, but I lament heavy over that now to where I will not touch one. A future education and the future as a whole I should have taken a lot more seriously than I could possibly have imagined. School did push for it, but I was a fool and did not care.
Other than the occasional family visit, I did nothing and learned nothing. Never taught to cook much, properly clean, shop for necessities, make right finances, etc. Future prospects was left to whatever I would choose, which I would put it later down the road. Never got any real world experience and just been sheltered for so long, both by my doing and my moms. No drive to do anything, nothing of a hopeful future, no being pulled out of whatever I was doing to learn anything or having skills necessary in the world today be incentivized. Aside from making sure I did well in school, I was left to myself.
She always has something to complain about. Streaks of mean and grumpy. Remembered somethings of what we were interested in but other times just an empty face. Who my mom is today is doom and gloom, speaking two different points that are showing the worst of her and nitpicking over every possible detail. Most of who she enjoys in media has an underlying toxic presence to them with name calling. Polarize, prejudice, politicize, judge and bias everything. Norway and Iceland? Too cold and mountainous, how could anyone have settled there? Germany? They all speak the same language and cannot understand anyone in a city that is 30 minutes away. That guy's accent she can't stand and defaulted to being generated, even though he sounds the same speaking Finnish. All for a better planet yet everything is wasted, trashed, or sent to China. Treat others how you want to be and from where I stand, seem like a backtalking coward. Couldn't have a water pitcher because "no one refilled it" to keep the filter going when I made sure to keep it plentiful. If she has a problem she will bring up the one exact same example related to the topic that I have heard plenty before. And most of the negative aspects of society happen more likely than they should. All while bring home a 24, 30 or however many count of budweiser a week at least. I imagine we only got along because I wasn't a brat anymore and did not try to upset her. Falling in line if you will.
Emotions bottled or maybe emotionally dead. The masculinity trap of what is the general expectation of "men". To express myself, to show emotion, to even cry is something I don't want to do out of fear of being seen, which is ironic given the code of the samurai. 6th grade she didn't remember to pick me up even though I said and called and a friend and his friend caught me being emotional and stayed around a bit to comfort me.
The fear that was put into everything. An actual quote went something as "If you get hurt, I'm not going to drive you to the hospital". Another "All girls are evil". And "that sounds too confrontational" when I asked neighbors to clean after their dog. Even questioning if my eyes doing something required a doctor for her to say that my eyes will fail naturally and something about her relative who had an eye problem and didn't see a doctor. Things that made me not do the kinds of things I want to do now. I have been so sheltered then and now that I want to go out but there is the ever scared part of me towards the unknown world. I feel I have been prejudiced into thinking such ways but there's no personal experience to back or challenge said thoughts.
Admittably, parts of me are glad I know what I have and want for morals and mindset, but its also a matter of temptation and theres still so much that I wish to explore. At times I feel I matured too quickly at the cost of a kids stupidity or innocence and now am too serious and heavyhearted for my own good. To be told how I've matured when there wasn't much to mature from. A part of me feels that I have taken after her cold, judgemental, selfish attitude and that makes me fearful to screw up any kind of friendship or relationship, and dreading that I could reflect that onto any child I may have no matter how far away into the future I do have one. I kind of want to hate her but I am so emotionally gone or warped that I can't. If I "rebel" now, or begin to, I feel that might get the fire started.
She would argue with my dad from time to time but then that continued on for days and it was a cold environment lasting days to weeks after a fight. Even prior to their fights, they rarely slept together in the same bed, let alone the same room. She would critique his employer and even his choice of friends. Once he woke up late, thus having us late to get ready for school and she began one for that. I don't remember the exact details but she once criticized him over a coat he got me. All while listening from the top of the stairs to even the bottom where I was covered by a wall. A few times we listened and we made noise that I think made them aware of us but that didn't stop them. Even starting in our presence where we would leave the room. It got to the point where he actually packed lightly to leave for the night or days and my brother and I stopped him just so he could be home. I wish I did let him go then.
I really do believe I could have had it differently if my dad was alive. He made such an effort. When I was in hospital at 4, he made the efforts to get me out and moving around. When I didn't know a swim style, he literally chucked me towards the deeper waters (I was scared, but he was right in the end, one of the fondest memories). He taught me how to use the mower and had a mini shop set up in the garage. I played with him so much and he got me into the complex games he enjoyed as I got older. For as rough we were, he was so gentle. I looked up to him then and even more than ever now. He made the effort to be one worthy of "Dad" and he was damn well worthy of that and no one could be more better for me.
"Faded gray are all the days of yesteryears So much time has turned to memories and to tears" -Valkyrja
I did graduate HS 3 years ago, did a summer program and since nothing. No job, education chances, or life plans. Even though I felt smarter, I was turned off of college simply for cost reasons and "feeding the rich" mindset. Last summer I began to look at my past and future with a whole new look with no physical change taking effect. First week into March this year I realized what I have been doing compared to how others are living through good and bad and I fell into depression hard. Now it persists with great off and on. Where I have been up at 9 in the morning to suddenly be up at 5 or 6 in the afternoon. Throughout the past 3 years, there was no making sure I was ok, no seeing how I felt, no finding out what I wanted to do. And I am still frightened of what may be out there, even when that is the key to the living that I want. I want to go, I need to go. But where? I leave for the good and better of myself, but I also leave behind this place I've called home, yet it's now so far from the one I want to remember with a fond memory. So much happens that seems to have been "normal" when it doesn't seem like it should. The same place with the same inhabitants in the same motions. No going out, no difference, no change, and VERY artificial. Nothing means anything anymore. To let how I feel about the previous years subside in me or blow over...
Always have been insecure, hesitant, second guessing. While others had spent their 18s, 19s and 20s going into the world doing many things, I've had the summer program at 18, nothing at 19, and two days in the big city to attend a concert at 20. Little noteworthy moments under my belt. It seems like love in the immediate family was not two ways or had to be earned. I have not grown. Who I am is not who I want to be at heart.
For 21, I know I should have more skills and be in better places, but theres nothing from anyone. No check-in, no advice, no motivation. Like "the birdling will leave the nest" instead of anyone preparing a boy to what is before him. Its not a snap of fingers or blink of an eye do I learn what is expected. On the grown up part, I feel heavily underprepared for the world and life. Far too long have I stayed and lived in my head. I cannot understand why I am still at home, a part of myself thinks to keep the peace but what peace needs to be kept? Nothing and no one is stopping me from leaving except myself and the thought that they will most definitely want to know where I am if I go, which I do not want to tell anyone. Or that I've been sheltered and not have realised the gates have been unlocked long ago. Things are not ok and I want to stop pretending when I leave. Even with Spring's green grass under a blue sky that ends the day with the orange sunset piercing the clouds to make them blue and pink do I feel grey.
"Watching to the night with tired eyes Waiting for nothing all my life" -Battle Against Time
I feel the kid within me, wanting to do those exciting things, yearning for any kind of companion or fellowship. What daylight reveries I can conjure to make him feel hopeful enough so he can shine soon. The things I want to do to feel happy. I want to water that little guy.
A lot of this I have remembered recently and still am connecting the dots. I already am upset at myself for not doing anything in life, but I want to be angry and I honestly hate myself for not seeing this sooner and listening to her for so long. Despite feeling broken and defunct, I still feel young enough but there's been so little done that it feels many chances are long gone. There is more freedoms I have that I do not know about and ones that I have had before that gathered dust. And now I am in a toss up between beginning college preparation now, leaving states or the country to act on these now childhood regrets. I don't want to be who I am now any longer. I just want to do something. And in between it all, confusion of what to do, how to feel and saddened that I am not who I once was or could have been.

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Hello everyone,
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Or, more aptly, give Google Gemini feedback. Taking the PE in 12 weeks and kicking off 3x/week study sessions. Let me know if you have any topic suggestions or other comments to what Google Gemini gave me when i asked " I'm taking the PE - Power exam in 12 weeks. Make me a 12 week study schedule "

12-Week PE Power Exam Study Schedule

This is a general schedule to get you started. You can adjust it based on your existing knowledge, preferred study methods, and available time.
Resources:

• NCEES PE Power Exam specifications (https://ncees.org/exams/pe-exam/electrical-and-compute)
• Your chosen study materials (textbooks, practice problems, online courses)

Weekly Breakdown:
Weeks 1-4: Focus on core topics (40% of exam)

• Week 1: Power Systems Analysis (30%) - Review fundamental concepts like power flow, stability, and symmetrical components.
• Week 2: Machine Analysis (20%) - Understand motor and generator operation, including starting characteristics and synchronous machine analysis.
• Week 3: Protection & Control (20%) - Focus on protective relaying principles, circuit breaker coordination, and control system basics.
• Week 4: Power Electronics (10%) - Grasp the concepts of power converters, inverters, and power quality.

Study Activities:

• Review relevant chapters in your study material.
• Take detailed notes and highlight key points.
• Solve practice problems from your chosen resource or past NCEES exams (https://account.ncees.org/exam-prep/).
• Form a study group (optional) to discuss concepts and test each other.

Weeks 5-8: Address specific topics (35% of exam)

• Week 5: Transmission Lines (12.5%) - Learn about transmission line parameters, power flow analysis, and voltage regulation.
• Week 6: Distribution Systems (12.5%) - Understand distribution system analysis, fault calculations, and grounding principles.
• Week 7: Power System Economics (5%) - Review economic principles related to power generation and transmission.
• Week 8: Power Plant Engineering (5%) - Study different types of power plants, including their operation and maintenance.

Study Activities:

• Follow a similar approach to weeks 1-4, focusing on specific topics.
• Consider incorporating online resources or video lectures for more in-depth explanations.
• Start practicing full-length practice exams under timed conditions.

Weeks 9-11: Review and Practice (25% of exam)

• Week 9: Review weak areas identified from practice exams.
• Week 10: Focus on Codes & Standards (12.5%) - Study National Electrical Code (NEC) and other relevant codes for proper electrical installations.
• Week 11: Practice more full-length exams under timed conditions. Analyze mistakes and refine your approach.

Study Activities:

• Revisit challenging topics from previous weeks.
• Focus on memorizing important code requirements.
• Analyze performance on practice exams and address knowledge gaps.
• Consider taking additional practice exams from different sources.

Week 12: Final Touches (Pre-Exam Week)

• Review key concepts and formulas.
• Get a good night's sleep before the exam.
• Relax and be confident in your preparation.

Additional Tips:

• Develop a realistic study schedule: Be honest about how much time you can dedicate each day/week.
• Find a quiet study space: Minimize distractions and maximize focus.
• Take breaks: Schedule short breaks to avoid burnout.
• Maintain a healthy lifestyle: Eat nutritious food, exercise regularly, and prioritize sleep.
• Ask for help: Seek clarification from colleagues, professors, or online forums if needed.

Remember, this is a sample schedule. You can adjust it based on your strengths and weaknesses. Consistency and focused studying are key to success. Good luck with your PE Power exam!