Corporate letter to dinner

Hey ladies and gentlemen,
I am Alexander. (It's an online name people call me)
I am here to tell you guys a story that I barely told anyone around me, just so the world knows the truth of this. At least someone knows right?
Around 4 years ago, I met a girl through a local friend group who play games together and hang out once in a while. Let's call her Naomi here. I just recovered from my depression and was getting a degree in clinical psychology and she was a high school drop out that do nothing with PTSD from a sexual assault that happened when she was 14 by a classmate.
She has a boyfriend at the time and I am a couple of years older than her. (She is an adult.) Soon we became friends and she would come to me for stress relieve and share her stories with me. She later on broke up with her BF and we didn't get in touch for a while because I had my own personal problems.
During the time that I am not really in touch with her, she did a lot of things to make me happy and make me feel special, she tried very hard to get me back into her life and wrote me a card and hinted that she has something for me. Which i felt the same towards her but never acted on it in any way, shape or form.
Eventually we got together and this is when the nightmare begins. 3 months in our relationship, she disappeared one night and never called me back. She kept texting me throughout the night though and eventually i facetimed her cuz we texted for 4 hours. She picked up the facetime and I saw her ex next to her.
Her reasoning is that her dad refused to pick her up after doing some work till late in that area and she has not enough cash to cab home, so she has to wait until 6am in the morning. She asked her ex who lived nearby for money but he is broke as she is, so he asked her to stay at his place till the morning. I was very angry but i eventually forgave her since we have been texting the whole night and she willingfully picked up the phone indicating that she has nothing to hide, which is a big mistake. (Foolish of me I know)
Fast forward after a while, the arguments between me and her because of her ex gets bigger. She constantly keeps in touch with him and would hang out or even play games with him. We eventually broke up because of all that and she having to leave to another country soon.
I was devastated. I really loved her and knew that a lot of things i did before the break up made it unmendable. Which is a part of my self destructive behavior.
I throw a very big tandrum at her when I discovered that during her saddest time when her family member passed away, she went to hang out with some guy rather than me. That was the thing that made me cut contact with her and not want a thing to do with her anymore.
After being in pain for 8 to 10 months, She reached out to me again. It was my birthday and she sent me a gift through mail. It was a box with 30 letters. She apparently has been writing very once in a while. The last letter she told me that she wanted to commit suicide and asked if i would forgive her if she did.
I was in shock and scared of losing her. So I immediately reached out to her, My heart pounding every second when i called her but no one picked up. For the entire day. I was scared and I was literally praying to whatever out there that this is not some cruel joke. That evening at 11PM she called me back, i was so relieved, she told me that she forgot to take her phone to work and we reconnected.
After a while she is mentally more stablised. Told me how her family went bankrupt and took all her savings from her. I was there for her for a while and then I asked what does she want from this because I don't want to be her friends again and I rarely stay in touch with my exes. She told me she wanted to fix the relationship. We started dating again and before I dated her, I asked her if her ex is still around her life. She claimed that he is trying to get back with her but she doesn't want to be with him and he bought her some gifts and that's it.
I asked her numerous time and even told her if she has unresolved relationship issues and not know what she wants, she should wait. She spent a lot of time reasurring me that she just wanted to be with me.
At that time I was looking for jobs for her, helping her family build a website for their family business and always being there for her to make her happier. I just wanted to be with this person, I was so in love with her and treated her with amount of love that I don't even know I have in me. I was proud of myself.
Christmas came and it was only like 2 months since we got back together. I asked her out and on the day of christmas, she refused to come out, telling me that she is sick and a bunch of reasons. I was furious because I don't believe any of it. She eventually came out very late (at around 9pm) and then we met up.
Her ex called when she was at my place. She had a 5 minute conversation with him in front of me. Saying that he wanted to hang out with her and her other friend cuz they were high school buddies. I didn't look deeper into it but it has a weird feeling on me the whole night.
So when she went to bed, I checked her phone. I checked her messages with her ex. They are dating. They are in a relationship the entire time. I was devastated and waited till she wakes up to talk to her about it.
She told me a sob story of how her mom took a bunch of money from her ex and she felt she had to be with him because her mom wouldn't pay it back, she reassured me that she was about to handle it herself but failed to. She then talked to her ex in front of me and broke up with him.
After that incident, life was so much better, our relationship was flying and I thought, damn this is finally over. Nope. i was naive, stupid and blinded by my love for her. Soon she started hanging out with her ex again and i found out again but i have no evidence of her cheating so I could not do anything at all and if I bring it up she accuses me of being controlling, jealous and emotional about it. She accuses me of being depressed and have mental problems.
This time she pushed me to a breaking point, I tried to force the truth from her but she wouldn't give it to me. We had a fight at my place and then she left after she calling her ex and telling him that she is with me and wouldn't get back with him.
After that I got a call from the cops. Checking if I was fine. Because someone said I was hurt. (I cut myself with a cutter very lightly when i was trying to beat the truth out of her) Then the next day she called me and said her mom called the cops on me because during our argument she tried attacking me and had a bruise on her leg and left arm because of her failed attack and my attempt to calm her down. She said her mom insisted that I attacked her and forcefully took her to the cops and hospital to check the wounds out. But she assured me that she will go drop the case.
After this, I was mentally incapable of dealing with anything anymore. I was just drinking all day and rarely seeing her. I have asked to break up numerous times but the crying face of hers really hurt me, I love her despite all her flaws and despite that she is probably bad for me. I had so much feelings for her and the last thing i wanted to see is her crying. I was emotionally confused and stuck.
Finally cops one day came to my house to arrest me for assault. Funny thing is I was facetiming her during this and she talked to the cops for me. I was still arrested and she went there the next day to drop the charges.
But we stayed together and soon after this she got sick numerous times and I have paid for her medical bills numerous times, we see each other less and less though. I tried asking her to go to therapy with me which she refused to. I have exhausted every option, including a MDMA based conversation because I read how it helps people connect. I was desperate to reach a point of understanding with her.
Right after her final surgery, we went out to have dinner and I asked to break up with her again. She promised she would change and begged me to stay, she said she will make things right after she comes back from Japan. (She has a trip to japan for 10 days with her female friend)
I again agreed to it and she left to japan the next day. I never felt good about this trip. On the final few days on her trip I found out that i was right. By stalking her ex's instagram, i realised that he is in japan with her cuz he changed his icon and the background looks like Osaka to me.
I immediately contacted her about this, she just said she doesn't know her ex is there and made up a bunch of fucking lies and say she cannot call me cuz her female friend's family is in an airBNB with her.
I don't believe her, so I contacted her best friend but she didn't respond. Then I contacted her mother, who she claims to hate me a lot. Her mother told me she never hated me and expressed a lot of interest in talking to me in the future, even thanking how I took care of her. But sadly, she was also tricked by my question and exposed that she is cheating on me.
I asked her mom. "She went to Japan with Husky right? (Made up name). Her mom was like, "yeah" Her mom was shocked that I was her BF too, thinking we broke up or something apparently. Later her mom tried to tell me she went with a bunch of female friends too. (Obviously an attempt to keep her cheating a secret)
So I texted her again with the new information. She goes on to tell me how her ex went there too for a couple of days with his family and she was just there too so they met up for 1 day. Which later changed to it was a trip with him and her female friend but they stayed in different airbnbs.
I don't trust her, so I contacted her "female friend" who is supposed to be there through mutual friends. Found out that she NOT ONLY CHEATING ON ME. BUT LYING TO THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD ABOUT ME.
SHE CLAIMED TO HER FRIENDS THAT I AM MENTALLY ILL AND SHE WAS NEVER WITH ME, I ONLY DO THINGS FOR HER CUZ I AM CRAZY FOR HER AND SHE NEVER DATED ME. SHE TOLD THEM THAT I AM VERY ANNOYING AND WOULD ANNOY HER ALL THE TIME.
SHE ALSO SAID BECAUSE OF MY MENTAL ILLNESS, SHE WOULD OCCASIONALLY GIVE ME ATTENTION SO I FEEL BETTER. SHE ASKED THIS FRIEND TO EVEN SEND HER SOME FAMILY PHOTOS TO PROVE THAT SHE IS WITH HER FAMILY TO HIDE THE FACT THAT SHE WENT TO JAPAN WITH HER EX.
HER FRIEND IS NEVER IN JAPAN WITH HER. EVER! And her friends even had me PROVE THAT she is dating me. I was so fucking devastated and felt so fucknig ashamed of myself for having to prove that my girlfriend IS MY GIRLFRIEND.
I called her again and gave her a chance to tell me the truth and why, I would have walked away and still be broken but I knew it has to end there. But nope, she called me annoying cuz i found out everything and blocked me everywhere.
Then I asked her for the money i gave her for some of her medical bills the past month. Since she wasn't my GF anyways. Why the fuck am I responsible for her health and everything when she is obviously fucking another fucking man out there?
I went to her fucking house with my sister to talk to her and she didn't even come home to see me. She was fucking hiding in her ex's home and preparing to find ways to lie to him as well. Her mom refused to talk to me and kept asking me to give her time to help me deal with this and I was so fucking furious I snapped and demanded my money back or I will sue her for scamming me. (Idk if that is even a thing)
She gave me back 10% of the fucking money and went to all my friends, saying that I ABUSED HER AND RAPED HER AND EVEN SAID SHE WANTED TO CALL THE COPS ON ME. EVERYONE STARTED CALLING ME A RAPIST. EVEN HER MOM CALLED ME AND ASKED ME IF I HAD DATE RAPED HER WITH RAPE DRUGS.
THIS MONSTER! AFTER EVERYTHING I DID, I WAS EVEN LOOKING FOR A HOUSE TO MOVE OUT WITH HER CUZ SHE WANTED TO LEAVE HER FAMILY. I WAS WORKING 2 JOBS FOR HER, I WAS DOING EVERYTHING I COULD FOR THIS FUCKING MONSTER. THIS MOTHER FUCKING MONSTER WHO IS AS HEARTLESS AS A FUCKING DEVIL.
I am SO ANGRY. I am SO fucking SAD. For MONTHS, NO ONE WILL UNDERSTAND THE PAIN I AM IN. FOR MONTHS I AM TRYING TO FIGHT MY DEPRESSION TO STAY ALIVE. FOR MONTHS I AM TRYING TO NOT FUCKING KILL MYSELF. FOR MONTHS I AM WORKING MY ASS OFF TO MOVE ON.
AND FOR HER? SHE EVENTUALLY DUMPED HER EX AND GOT WITH ANOTHER GUY LOL. COMPLETELY HAPPY LIFE WITHOUT ANY FUCKING CONSEQUENCES. AND I AM CALLED WEAK AND USELESS BY EVERYONE AROUND ME OR OCCASIONALLY A RAPIST.
I can't anymore. It's been months, but i can't anymore. I am not sure how much longer would I be able to do this, I am really not. I am done with this world. I am done with this life.
I never had a family, I never had parents, I never had anyone love me, I never had anyone who truly care about me. I just want to be a loving boyfriend/husband/father, I wanted to be a kind person. I wanted so bad, so so so bad. i tried so hard, i hope you people who read this would believe me.
please believe me.. please..because i am so broken feeling like no one would.
i just wanted to get a bottle of helium and be gone, I don't want to me here anymore
I would never trust anyone again nor love anyone again.
And oh, when the case was cancelled the cop told me she didn't go to the police station with her mom, she went with a guy, turned out to be her ex too. lol
I am a fucking joke and a failure.
Sorry I am out of energy to type a TLDR, if anyone wanted to help please go ahead.

​

• JPMorgan Chase experienced a fall in stock value on Friday although their financial outcomes surpassed analyst projections. The exception was net interest income not meeting the anticipated figures.
  
• The institution saw a dip in net interest income after attaining peak levels in the preceding quarter of 2023.
  
• CEO Jamie Dimon communicated to shareholders the institution's readiness to navigate varying economic scenarios. These could include a downturn, a mild economic impact, or a surge in economic growth.
  

During the last session of the week, JPMorgan Chase's trading saw its shares diminish by over five percent following the announcement of its quarterly financial performance. The bank showcased an outperformance in the earnings and revenue against forecasts, but didn’t meet the projected figures for net interest income.
The financial summary reveals thatJPMorgan Chase reported profits amounting to $14 billion, equal to earnings of $4.63 per share, with total revenue reaching $41.9 billion. These figures not only exceed the analyst consensus, but also come in higher than the numbers from the same quarter in the previous year.
Nonetheless, their net interest income presented a shortfall at $23.2 billion, falling short of the record $24.1 billion seen in the last quarter of 2023.
In the days preceding the report, analysts had lifted their predictions slightly for the bank's performance.
Q1 2024 Actual Projected for Q1 2024 Q1 2023 Change from Last Year (%) Total Revenue $41.9B $41.28B $38.3B 9.3% Earnings Per Share (EPS) $4.63 $4.14 $4.10 12.9% Net Profits $14B $12.59B $12.6B 11.1%
Jamie Dimon expressed during the earnings call that currently, the bank's clientele is faring well. Yet he stressed that various elements such as geopolitical tensions, elevated interest rates, inflation, and the impending presidential election in 2024 could alter the economic forecast for both individual and corporate customers.
He emphasized readiness for multiple potential outcomes. Stating that while the present situation is stable, it is essential for the bank to be geared up for various possible economic conditions.
In his yearly letter to investors earlier in the week, Dimon indicated diminishing prospects for a gentle economic impact. He also affirmed JPMorgan Chase's preparation for prolonged higher interest rates.
Stating several ongoing inflation-related stressors, Dimon cautioned on the uncharted impact of extensive quantitative tightening. He also underscored the bank's strategic planning for a broad array of eventual economic climates.
Despite the downturn experienced on Friday, JPMorgan Chase's stock has nevertheless seen an uptick of roughly seven percent since the year's start.

Hello all =) I wrote a post about NUS Law a few years back. Thankfully I have graduated from uni since then and am now a 2PQE (i.e. 2 years since called to the bar + 6 months of trainee period) in a large sized firm doing corporate work.
Wanted to write this as a continuum to the previous sharing on law school since I moved on to different phases of life now. Also, I have seen several posts recently querying about law school and practice in general so I hope to add insights in writing and hope that it will be helpful to anyone.
The usual disclaimers apply, all opinions are strictly mine only and may not be representative of the experience of other lawyers/law students (i.e. YMMV).
(AMA) I will be happy to engage in discussions on this thread or via a pm and I will do my best to answer to your queries when I can. To my fellow lawyers or law students in this thread, I will be most grateful if you share your perspectives as well. Thank you in advance for chiming in. Some stuff I may not be familiar with (e.g. the new format of the Part B course) and since its past my time, I will defer to all those who have a better insight into this. Also if you ask me about stuff outside public knowledge like international student quotas/chances/grade requirements or transfer grade requirements etc, sorry I can't answer as I don't have visibility on this - please ask the appropriate channels (i.e. admissions office).
1 Academics
Law School (NUS specifically)
Most of my sharing are already encapsulated in my previous post and/or my comments in the post. If you still want further insights, I think you can reference a video on law admissions by youtuber “Charlycatcatcat” which I found highly beneficial (please check out her other videos too, pretty good insight about day in the life of law student).
Mainly, I just wanted to address concerns about whether law school is tough and whether it is insufferable. The short answer is - (1) Yes it will be tough because you need to put in effort to understand the numerous law concepts and the bell curve is tougher due to the higher concentration of top-performing students (2) but it is not insufferable and extraordinarily difficult to the extent that you lose your bearings etc.
With regard to (1), there is a lot of complex law concepts to grasp, concepts are much tougher than JC. There are many grey areas and nuances in the law that is not easily picked up. But that is the beauty of studying law, to sieve out these nuances and to put things into your perspective. You might find that the position in law for most issues cannot be simplified into just a 1-2 liner, there is always a qualification/assumption which have not been addressed yet or a judgement sometimes give a contradictory statement which you will have to explain away. This is where you will put in your evaluation and state your stand. The reading list for classes is also very long (mostly unfinishable) and also there is always more to study and people might do practice papers like 5-10 years back. But end of the day, just go at your pace lol - (1) if you only read the required readings (2) if you start practice papers only 1-2 days before the exams and only do 2-3 practices, so be it lol. It is required/optional readings for a reason.
In addition, the bell curve might be daunting to people but I also want to reassure that the average in law school is much wider than in other majors, to the extent that top 10% FCH, next 60-65% Second Upper, so it is much more manageable to be average in NUS Law (specifically) than maybe other majors or other schools lol. Also don't fret and try to desensitise yourself from comparison with the other students that are very outspoken during class. For NUS Law, the class participation usually takes a smaller percentage of the grades and project work is few. If you're an introvert and not as outspoken, this is actually quite perfect for you since exams is entirely on you. And the bulk of class discussion is usually about evaluation of the law and what people think the law is - if its me, I frankly can't be bothered to give an f about what the law should be. I just find the evaluation that makes the most sense to me with reference to seniors notes and go along with it. So just don't be bothered by the class discussion and especially if you think your classmates all know their shit. If you don't understand your classmates' viewpoint - just ignore it lol, it's more likely not going to make or break your exam performance.
Even if you don't do well in law school, don't sacrifice your mental health over it. Second lower still likely gets you a job as a lawyer if you put in the work and effort, practice is also a whole different ballgame altogether. Just take a look at lawyer's profiles on Linkedin and firm websites, do you see people putting FCH or second-upper (other than a select few which I don't really understand why)? So my point is - even if you don't do well, its not as career threatening as you think. Now if you compare that with other industries, I'd see some posts across main sg reddit, asksg and sgexams reddit that larger MNCs or government agencies don't look upon second lower and below favourably. Also, if you apply for a general role like marketing/ business development, you are competing with tons of other majors and their respective schools. Law definitely gets the upper hand here - so long as you're called to the bar you're good to practice, also the only real competition for lawyecounsel jobs are really just within the industry.
With regard to (2), I just wanted to add that local law schools have a wealth of senior notes/muggers that have been constantly updated year-on-year, such that you won't be left alone trying to bash through learning all the complex law concepts. The no-bs general "hack" is to find one set of notes that suits your understanding and that you feel is useful in making your own notes or prepared paragraphs for exams (mostly open book), change the sentence structure and paraphrase. Practice papers are also available and if you are lucky to find good seniors, there may even be prepared answers for you to consider. In a nutshell - while law concepts may be tough, there are tools you will find which will greatly reduce the learning curve. And since exams are mostly open book anyway, the key of your exam preparation is to know where to find the answer in your prepared notes from the mountains of paragraphs that you will be preparing.
You are not going to encounter a large majority of the stuff you studied in law school when you are in practice. Your end goal at the end of law school is (a) to know how and where to find information (eg. which agency), (b) how to read cases/regulations/statute, (c) identify legal issues from a problem put to you (d) how to draft/explain the law position in legal terms and for layperson, to apply the law. If you can conquer (a) - (d), I'd say your are pretty fine.
Part B Bar Course
Most of the stuff I'm going to say is outdated since I was on the old system of 8 exam subjects. The format and topics have since changed and the apparent woes with the new system are well documented. I won't profess to have knowledge/experience in the revamped Part B so I will defer to juniors who have been through the system. Kudos to them for being the first (few) batches to the new system and having to suffer all these bad experiences.
All I just wanted to say is - the pass rate for bar exams is v high (anecdotally 90% and above, check out the "Report of the committee of professional training of lawyers" published 2018). I have a much more manageable time studying for the previous version of Part B because (1) seniors muggers are available as usual (2) I have less evaluation of the law to study and more so the application of law. Most law students would agree with me that the evaluation is usually the harder one (3) exams are open book again lol, a little bit of control-f and knowing where to find info in your hardcopy notes can serve you well.
To give an indication, I studied maybe 50% of the time for Part B as I studied for law school. Some of my friends even travelled in the month right before Part B exams (cos the air lanes just opened up after COVID) so you get the idea lol. Personally, I had a whale of a time going for dance course, fitness/instrument classes.
2 Application tips (interview and cover letter)
Cover Letter and CV
During law admissions/internship applications/ TC applications/job applications, this is often a major component to (1) get you a door to the interview (2) used as a basis for queries during your interview.
(i) For cover letter, most people recommend 1 page limit. The general format goes:

1. 
   
2. / >
   
3. /
   
4. 
   

Make sure all your paragraphs flow and the point is being put across most effectively. Please also don't spam or make generalised statements because HR can tell if it is a copy-paste job.
To give an example for (3) "Why choose the particular law firm" - "I look forward to a training contract with because I witnessed first-hand the nurturing and receptive work environment during my 3 week internship in May 2023. During my internship, my mentors were very patient in explaining each task assigned and the deliverables. (can describe the task abit here) They provided useful pointers and went through my completed draft in detail. The final product to client was also provided for my reference and this was greatly beneficial in my understanding of how the task assigned should be completed. Such practical knowledge would definitely aid in my practice development and I am enthusiastic at the opportunity to work in such a supportive environment in . I think the soft skills I picked up (during your self intro in para 1) will make me a good fit for the " - hope you all got the point here.
(ii) For CV, list out your most favourable roles. Then, summarise (1) what skills you picked up (can be certs you picked up also) (2) what things you accomplished and make sure you use those positive action/pronoun words eg. "Successfully planned and executed a funfair event attended by 300 students with favourable reviews from participants, featured on school websites/news websites." or for law focused "Acted for a large multi-national company in a commercial dispute pertaining to the Sale of Goods Act 1979 and drafted witness statements for 2 factual witnesses and 1 expert witness for arbitral proceedings."
(iii) For both CV and cover letter - Get a nice format and look professional, just buy it off those template websites if required.
Interview
Think it's cliche but can't be emphasised enough - try to treat an interview as a conversation rather than a debate/scolding/grilling etc.
(1) Always state your points/response to the question/discussion then elaborate. Do some signposting along the way so that people can follow what you are talking about. Max have 2-3 points so people know you are judicious in answering and not rambling/spamming.
Example again - "I want to practice in the funds department because (1) the booming fund management industry in Singapore and (2) there is a good blend of transactional, regulatory and advisory work. For (1), I note that and also MAS have recently announcement a repeal of the registered fund management company regime to streamline the fund management licensing processes. This shows that the field is very prevalent and dynamic, which is something I will enjoy since I like to read the news and keep up with recent developments. For (2), I understand from seniors I talked to in this field that . Transactions = fund formation/fund structuring, regulatory = correspondence with regulatory authorities and to make sure all their concerns/policy intents are addressed. advisory = compliance with regulations or the different types of fund structures and any risks/blind spots to take note".
For litigation - please also refrain from putting a general description. If you like the dispute resolution strategy portion, bring up some examples like "During my internship, we poured through the evidence to uncover that there is a gap in which goes to proving our case that the contract have not been breached. Such evidence was essential because . Through this experience, I understand the importance of seeking the right evidence and proper studying of evidence/research of the law etc."
(2) When answering questions, answer the question and take a moment to think if you need to.
A simplistic example is "What did you do during the weekend?". The answer shouldn't be "The pasta at this cafe was so amazing and pet-friendly"... it should be a "I did X + X activity over the weekend at . The had a very good ambience and allowed pets etc etc...".
If you find it difficult, make a conscious effort to repeat/rephrase the question to the interviewer. "I understand your query pertains to whether therapeutic justice is the right direction for family justice in Singapore - my answer is yes as (1) it promotes co-parenting which is beneficial for a child's development and (2) it reduces the emphasis on divorce as split of marriage but rather as an assessment of how parties can make arrangements for essential segments of the marriage (eg. children, maintenance) after it has ended".
Last point is to make any assumptions/qualifications/clarifications if you require and especially for controversial questions, it shows that you are thinking and genuine in answering.
(3) Use some useful response formats when answering particular questions. Eg for situational questions - I highly recommend using this STAR response.
(4) Tone and words. This is underrated but very important and can go to show that you are respectful and willing to learn. Refrain from using "Logic will dictate that"/It is common sense that...", instead use "Thank you for sharing this alternative viewpoint, I understand where you're coming from in that . Respectfully, I am of opinion that this alternative viewpoint should be considered for the reasons below.". Or "As I mentioned previously" - there is no point saying this, just repeat your previous point again and make the necessary links to that topic you all are talking about, if you really want - just do some subtle mentioning like "If you may recall, we were talking about shortly before and I would just like to bring us back to ".
In summary, try to prepare for an interview by having a conversation with friends/having a career guidance/interview practice session with your school's career counsellor (NUS has it).
(5) Magic final question - "What questions do you have for me". Ah this is an age-old debate whether you should ask questions. Personally, I would want to and to make sure that the questions are smart. You don't even need to ask a deep question about the particular field and stuff. You can simply ask "How is the workflow/environment that I will be expecting in this team. I understand during my chats with my mentor during my internship that there will be a Associate/Senior Associate/Partner on every file". It shows that you are interested to work for a particular team. More often or not - interviewers are looking more at fit and willingness to learn rather than your knowledge etc.
(6) Weakness questions - the shining light in such questions is if you actually make a conscious effort to list steps about how you overcome this weakness. Eg. "I may not understand/follow a discussion very well during my as parties speak too fast and I have limited visibility of the matter at hand since I only joined for that one meeting. To overcome this, I try to take down as many key words as possible and then revisit them with my mentors after the meeting to make sure that all my gaps in understanding have been addressed." This shows a willingness to learn and improve and is definitely a big plus point.
3 Law Practice
1 year training contract
TC is transiting to 1 year (instead of the 6 months soon). While it may seem sucky - it is what it is and kudos to those that are going to undergo the 1 year TC.
I also heard that the pay will be correspondingly adjusted so fret not if you think you will fall too much behind earnings wise. Anecdotally, I heard that for the large firms - its 2k for 6 months TC but rises to 4k+ for the next 6 months to put you on par with other fresh grads (Caveat that the veracity of this is still to be verified).
Law practice
The realities of practice is well documented - high attrition rates , long hours, unreasonable clients/bosses, toxic environments just to name a few. To put simply, I don't think these concerns are specific to law and can extend to many other fields as well (audit, teaching, healthcare etc). I just want to put a silver lining to all these and how we can find reasonable mitigating measures to any bad experiences.
The silver linings are (credits to chichasanchen for some of this) as follows:
(1) Law school tuition fees are more affordable compared to med sch/dent sch (13k compared to 24k+)
(2) Above median pay for fresh grads (after the (now) 1 year TC) and a great year on year increase (1k usually) - the YOY increase is virtually assured in most law firms so long as you're not severely underperforming. The additional salary is very worth the cons of long hours etc - I would much rather have tons of work (common in many other industries) and also be paid for it. Our pay is also not results/sales based which requires you to really go out and put your neck out there. For junior associates, the pressure to get clients is not put onto you (but your partners in charge) and you can comfortably develop your practice skills (eg. Drafting/Advocacy/Negotiation).
(3) Job security - well I would say its pretty high in private practice because there are many jobs now and its a buyers market for job-seekers. Just don't be severely underperforming/bad attitude
(4) Job competition and versatility - For private practice/in-house roles roles, your competition is other lawyers in your industry which is restricted. Compare this to eg. marketing roles or business development, you are competing with various other majors!! Also, law degree is more transferable than those very niche/specific industries and I have had batchmates that even go to UX/UI designing or marketing roles that goes to show that it is not as restrictive as thought. Exit options for private practice lawyers are v good also as there are many in-house counsel roles to choose from and some may take your private practice pay to benchmark, since your salary above median already so you won't starve.
(5) Work environment - this is very much dependent on your team and what your skillsets/preference are. YMMV and the toxic work environments/unreasonable client expectations are true to an extent. But then again - you're in control of your work environment since you can choose the team you work for. Further to my point at (3) above that there are several legal associate roles - you are in control of your work environment to a large extent.
I wanted to highlight that law practice is very much defined by individual circumstances so I don't think there is a blanket response. I will just state my personal experience as I have been in the same firm that I started my TC with and I found a (hopefully) sustainable environment for now. My bosses are great so far and not afraid to push back on client’s tough deadlines. If I’m busy on a weekend and there’s an urgent deadline, they are fine with a reasonable timeline (eg. Monday morning) so I can plan my weekend out to do my essentials and also set my own time to finish those urgent things. In my department - the default for work that comes in is that it’s not urgent (I.e can wait 1-2 working days) unless my bosses say so (compared to some other firms where responding fast is king). My bosses also front meetings and don't leave me fending for myself only. My bosses are also invested in my development and allow me to take on the less heavy tasks like form filling with client/explaining the law/early oral advocacy when client allows. Of course, I do also (1) play my part by delivering work on time and if I cannot - to state so, (2) have a positive learning attitude and deferential when required - I conscientiously take notes and try to improve my work product as much as possible, and not argue against my bosses lol (3) try my best to catch as many points as required in the work. My final point is that finding a good sustainable working environment can make practice more manageable.
I also wanted to mention finding a practice area that you see yourself doing for a long time is very important. I have had personal experience and also had countless batchmates that switched practice groups (eg. litigation to corporate and vice versa) during TC and during practice - it is not impossible to do so but just don't do it too late into your practice because your salary keeps increasing and it is hard to justify paying you the same salary if you are transiting to a new field with 0 experience and on a higher pay. Just always make sure you have a positive learning attitude to pick up things and to manage the learning curve.
Some might ask - why not move to international firm etc and have higher pay? But having worked with international firms and seeing how fast they (need to) react to client's requests etc and by my hesitance of leaving a good work environment, there isn't really a push factor for me as of now. That is as far as my concern goes for now.
For an interactive insight into a day in a life as a lawyer, I highly recommend checking out youtube account "Em and Lloyd" - while it is based in Hong Kong, it is highly applicable in Singapore as well.
Fresh trainees/associates - additional practice tips?
I recommend searching "Jason Feng" on linkedin for tons of good advice/tips he has for junior lawyers. Those guides are very relevant and useful.
To summarise - associates are there to facilitate the work and do first cuts. It may be menial jobs like proof-reading and formatting or to tougher jobs like remembering events/details on the file. But most importantly, you should focus on settling these tasks well before you move on to the more complex ones.
Formatting/proofreading is one of the easier things to nail down and something partners (usually) appreciate a lot. I highly recommend reading these 2 well-written guides for tips: Guide 1 and Guide 2.
Networking and Job opportunities
Law is quite a niche industry and there can be good network opportunities that one should tap on because you never know when you'd need a referral for new roles/clients for example. Don't be afraid to reach out to people on Linkedin for the teams/roles that you are interested in as well - it shows you actually bothered to do your research to see if you are a fit on the team. Same goes for international firm roles - if you really want to ask for a first hand account of a team, what better way to find on Linkedin.
I also won't profess to know much about in-house counsel roles since I haven't explored these yet. But I also understand from those in-house counsels (credits to chichasanchen as well) that their interview process is also more law focused (which is good and something in your domain) with fewer rounds of interviews than their counterparts in other departments since that is a legal-focused role afterall. So that's a plus point =)
Pro bono work
Basically entails free legal advice or representation. I have done numerous legal clinics and several CLAS/LAB cases both as a student and as a lawyer. It is really great to be able to use your professional skills and capacity to help the needy in society, very few professions/industries can say that~. There are many opportunities you can assist like making deputyship applications for those who lack mental capacity, representing those charged in criminal court but yet cannot afford legal representation or giving free legal advice.
4 (Bonus) - legal analysis
(Legal analysis 101 on a very simplified example - hope it helps for prospective students to understand how law can be used to address real-life problem)
"Friend A: My company fired me unreasonably. They mentioned that I have had unexplained absences. What can I do?
Lawyer: Oh sorry to hear that you have been dismissed. From my understanding, you feel that you may have been wrongfully terminated and you wish take legal action to pursue the necessary claims. Before we proceed further and before I can advise you on the - (1) I will need to take a look at your employment contract to see the terms in the contract specifically on grounds of termination (eg. how they can terminate you). You also mentioned that "unexplained absences" was cited as a reason for termination - may I know if you can quantify the number of absences and if available - whether there were any reasons provided.
Friend A:
You: Ok, I assume that (1) you have shown these MCs to your company and have written record (2) your company has cited your work absences as the only reason for your dismissal (3) you have not breached other terms of employment contract such as unsatisfactory work performance/behaviour.
The legal issue here rests on whether your company has breached the employment contract for wrongful termination. Based on the employment contract and the MCs that you have shown me, it appears there is a case for wrongful termination. Courses of action I will recommend is (1) Cheaper option - Report to MOM - see if we can mediate with your employer in in Tripartite Alliance for Dispute Management (TADM) (2) file a suit for wrongful termination: more costs incurred since we actually need to go through court processes, we will also need to take a deeper analysis on your case facts so we need you to provide all relevant materials (eg. correspondence with your employer) for study.
Moving forward, I recommend you proceed at TADM as first resort. Grateful if you may also provide all the correspondences with your employer (email/whatsapp etc all are fine) for our further study. We will keep you updated following that study on how to proceed."
_________________________________________________________________________________________________
That's all I have to share. Hope y'all found this useful~! Thank you all for reading this far and will be happy to answer any further queries
All the best especially to those entering law school/entering practice especially, I wish you much success in your endeavours. =)

An open letter to Phil Waugh and RA (and if World Rugby wants to read this too, that would be great, you are equally inept):
There are 3 fundamental problems with rugby in Australia. Unfortunately, 2 of those are largely out of RA’s hands. The way I see it is as follows:

1. TALENT. This is the old grassroots/investment story. We’ve all heard it a million times. RA doesn’t seem to have a plan to nurture the game at school level OR have a plan to retain those gifted players as they develop into professionals. Admittedly I don’t have the answer to this one (other than throwing money and resources at it), but I’m not an administrator. That’s their job and they’ve been woefully incompetent and arrogant in this regard. Out of the 3 major issues facing rugby in Australia, this is the only one I see as being totally within their control. It won’t fix everything but it’s a necessary start to be able to compete with the other codes.
   
2. MONEY. They don’t have any. Why? Because Super Rugby is a relic and completely unsuitable for today’s sporting landscape. The problem with Super Rugby is two-fold. Spreading games across the globe at all hours makes it near impossible to capture any sort of tv audience or interest. Secondly, the provincial model doesn’t work anymore, if you want tribal rivalry go watch state of origin or your local club games.
   

In relation to the first issue, it might have worked in the 90s, but who in their right mind thought it was a good idea for teams to be playing games in South Africa at 3am AET on the weekend. All sports, especially those in the overcrowded Australian market are competing for eyeballs, and therefore having games in prime time - every weekend (not just those weeks the Waratahs arent on safari) - is crucial. I cannot believe it took a global pandemic for people to see this. Pre covid there were plenty of weekends that, due to scheduling quirks (e.g. having two aussie teams in SA, one in NZ and another playing on a Friday night) the Saturday night primetime slot on the east coast was left completely vacant. Absolutely fantastic stuff. Great way to compete with the NRL. The NFL literally (and I do mean literally) has an entire team of people dedicated to scheduling, maybe rugby should dedicate at least 5 minutes of thought to scheduling, or is that asking too much?
Super Rugby is, or should be, the lifeblood of rugby in this country. Therefore it needs to be COMMERCIALLY VIABLE. Unfortunately, we are largely at the mercy of NZ here. They view super rugby more as an All Blacks training camp and are wedded to the outdated provincial model, lest any Australians dare learn their playing style, not to mention they are now partly owned by Private Equity… Super Rugby needs a salary cap and full player movement. That’s right, kiwis packing down scrums with aussies, player trades, free agency, the lot. Even international players should be eligible. The goal should be to have the best professional league in the world. That’s it. A competition of this nature could quite easily support 5 Aus teams and 5 NZ teams (with plenty of room for growth if successful). The time difference between Auckland and Perth is only 4 hours. If the Western Force played a handful of afternoon games on the weekend, pretty much every game on the schedule would fall between 530-930 AET (and 730 to 1130 in NZ), a huge improvement over the old model. And while on the topic, I don’t think the Pacifica teams would necessarily work in this competition- at least at the start. It’s an unfortunate commercial reality that teams need to be playing in world class stadiums with all the corporate amenities. Taking the odd regular season game to these countries is a good way to grow the game and support our pacific neighbours but I don’t think a full time team based there works while this competition gets off the ground. Super Rugby needs to strip it back and focus on the fundamentals before taking the game to the world.
RA needs to get on its knees and beg NZ rugby and its PE owners to come to the party here. Super Rugby in its current format will absolutely die a not-so-slow death.

1. ENTERTAINMENT. Ultimately, this is what rugby is about. And I give RA a pass here, World Rugby, this one is SQUARELY on you. Frankly, the rules and the refereeing are beyond a joke. Rugby on the whole just simply isn’t entertaining enough anymore. It’s 2024 and a penalty is still worth 3 points??? Really? In basketball you get 1 or 2 points (in a game where teams routinely score well over 100), in cricket 1 run, in league 2 points, in AFL and the NFL it’s zero, all you get is a few extra yards. But rugby? Sure, let’s give you over 10% of your total score from one infringement. Maybe that would be acceptable if we actually knew what the penalty was for. But we don’t. Because the rules are stupid. And half the time, like during a scrum, the referee is just guessing (or worse, falling for the tricks of a wily old prop). South Africa just won two World Cup finals scoring a combined one try. Yikes. I know the Poms love a good penalty goal, but that’s not entertainment in any ones books. You want to compete with the Super Bowl and Taylor Swift with that?

1 point for a penalty goal, short arm penalties only for scrums, no red and yellow cards. Foul play should be dealt with by ejecting the player from the game, but they should be replaced. Rugby was, is and always should be 15 on 15. When the head of world rugby is advocating for players to be sin binned to make the game more exciting, you’ve got a big problem. Imagine if Albanese advocated for more citizens being arrested to free up the job market. Lol.
That’s my rant. RA needs to realize it isn’t just competing against the NRL and AFL. These days it’s also competing with NFL, F1, NBA, golf, and every streaming service on the planet. Old world thinking won’t work and was never good enough in the first place. Phil and Dan are right, rugby is in a dire place and the game does need to be reset. Unfortunately I don’t think they have the vision to do it. I don’t think they see the bigger picture. Hopefully they at least see this post.

Hey all,
I am in charge or organising a large corporate dinner (about 400 people).
We'll be giving teams and individuals awards to celebrate their achievements.
There is some money available yo enhance the event so I was wondering what your ideas are to genuinely make this an enjoyable night for people.
Alcohol will be available.
I am currently exploring the idea of a photo booth.
I'm looking for some more ideas from some certified corporate baddies!

This is a lot of yapping, but you need to know the full thing to understand my situation:
​
For context, my girlfriend and I obviously have sex. We are both in highschool, and I have built a great relationship with my girlfriend's family, buying her mom flowers and always being extremely respectful. About 2 weeks ago, on the day of our 5 month, her mom found out we kept having sex after she told us to stop about 2 months ago, and my girlfriend's mom has been mentally abusing her, making her cry for 3 hours every night yelling at her that we broke her trust and also her bad grades and other stuff. I tried my best to rebuild the trust that she lost, I wrote 2 letters to the mom in the span of 4 days about how much I loved my girlfriend and how sorry we are for not listening, and although she still liked me as a kid, at the end of the day, we broke her trust. Her mom didn't outright make us break up, but she did say that from now on, we would only ever be able to be together in her mom's presence and supervision, basically at my girls house all the time, or maybe going out for dinner or something with her family. Her Mom also told her that if we did break up, she would not be allowed a boyfriend till college (keep this in mind). However, she was bringing my girlfriend to such a difficult position, where either she stayed with me and had her mom yell at her every night while also knowing that our future would be forever ruined as we could no longer be alone and always have the company of the mom, or break up with me and live in peace, but heartbroken as she wouldn't have me. My girlfriend and I broke up last thursday, after about a week of me just begging for her to wait it out a little bit longer to see if her mom would chill out, but at the end of the day I understood the pain she was going through and I couldn't make her do that for me. Just yesterday which was Monday, we finalized everything and our feelings, she said she loved me so much and that this is so hard for her, and I will always have a place in her heart, and i was the most perfect boyfriend ever, and no one could ever compare. The same day, last night, I guessed her snap password, and I found out she was snapping 3 guys she used to link with, and that very night she met up with a random guy who I never heard about and they did stuff, and they're hanging out again today. She has been calling so many guys hot on it, and sending pictures of her body to basically anyone, and texting them with so much energy that she hadn't given me in so long. I feel so heartbroken, my heart is so heavy, I cant stop crying, it feels like our whole relationship was fake. All my friends are saying that she is just doing it to fill the huge void I left in her when we broke up, but I could've still been there, instead she chose to make new connections and move on. I'm so confused, because I know that our relationship was so amazing, and I know she did not fake her feelings in our relationship, she fought so hard for me, many times I wanted to break up, but she cried for hours, texted me in paragraphs for hours, just to fight for me, and now that she won in that, this is what I face? It hurts so much, I loved her with everything I have, but it seems like she wasn't getting tired from her mom's constant yelling, she was just taking energy from me and putting it into other guys. At the end of the day, I think it was the mom's fault, but this situation showed who she truly was, as if she really loved me, she would keep fighting for me, or at least instead of sneakily linking with new guys, sneakily link with me. Prom is next weekend, and we were planning on going before this. I checked her messages, and the guy she's known for 2 days, she is going with. I truly don't know what to do, and I'm a smart kid and I have 4 ap tests next week, and I cannot fucking study or focus for absolute shit. I've lost my one motivation in life, she motivated me to do everything, just so I could see her on the weekends, or sometimes the weekdays. But now my first love is gone, and while I was trying to heal alone in peace, she moved on in less than 4 days. She promised me she would heal in peace as well, and not link up as that is no longer who she is since I changed her, but I guess you can never take the jungle out of the person, just the person out of the jungle. I just changed her temporarily i guess. I keep thinking that she will come back to me, but I have to face that she is also the one that made the decision to break up. I think she is linking up with other guys rather than me because she knows we can have no foreseeable real future together with her strict mom, and if we spent more time together, the inevitable breakup would hurt harder, but she also wouldn't be doing these things shes doing right now if she really loved me, and it seems like she's already locking in with another guy, when her mom said she couldn't have another boyfriend till college. Do I move on, and how? Did she ever really love me? Did I ever really change her ways, or was she just lying to keep me, but now that we can't be together anyways, is she just being her true self?
​
Also, our relationship, unlike many high school relationships, was not solely built on sex, at least not from my perspective. Maybe that's another thing, now that we can't have sex, does she not want me? Every single time we would see eachother, i would drive 35 minutes just to get to her house, and we would do so many things together, we didn't need sex to thrive. But maybe thats just me, maybe now that we can't do it anymore, she doesn't see any purpose in being with me.

In terms of machine translation from English to Chinese, which I have to say is always so literal (and barely gets it right when talking about Taiwanese Mandarin.), one time I showed it to my friends, one is from China and the other is from Taiwan, to compare differences within their vocabularies.
Right away, I noticed a glaring problem in Chinese translation, regardless of whether the Hanzi are written in simplified or traditional, (when I want to use Taiwanese Mandarin), most of the vocabulary that AI and translators always use is: "Mandarin (China)" by default instead of "Mandarin (Taiwan)" which immediately distinguishes the difference between both countries and their vocab choices. (This becomes annoying! - when learning Taiwanese Mandarin, since I have to change the vocabulary myself, which is something I hate doing when dealing with the Chinese language.)
This is because China has a larger demographic of Chinese speakers than Taiwan. (It is a pain when intending to use Taiwanese Mandarin - Not Mainland!) Taiwanese people immediately know that it’s machine translated as is made for “Mainland Chinese” rather than “Taiwanese Mandarin” (It sucks when using any machine translator in Taiwan.)
A friend of mine who is learning Chinese (upon visiting Taiwan) accidentally said: 視頻 (Taiwanese Mandarin: 影片) when talking about watching a YouTube video, in which they understood him but explained 影片 is the preferred word, as 視頻 is Mainland Chinese, that is a dead giveaway regarding his lessons & classes are taught using Mandarin (China) instead of Mandarin (Taiwan).
For example, take the word "Taxi Driver" - in Mainland China, they say 師傅 unlike in Taiwan, they use: 司機, in one of the sentences I have written upon Chinese translation, people from Taiwan know right away most machine translations resort to using: "Mainland Chinese" not "Taiwanese Chinese" as 師傅 appeared when in fact 司機 is the correct word for Taiwanese Mandarin, so that is how they distinguish the difference.
In terms of changes in vocabulary, for example, take the sentence:

"This power bank is really useful."

• China: 這個充電寶非常好用。
• Taiwan: 這個行動電源非常好用。

Vocab differences:

• China: the word 充電寶 is used when talking about a portable power bank.
• Taiwan: the word 行動電源 is used when talking about a portable power bank.

Also, when it comes to sentence structure, the characters are replaced, as well as their positionings being flipped or switched around within the sentences between Taiwanese and Mainland Chinese.
EG. "I'm having dinner"

• China: 我吃著晚飯。
• Taiwan: 我在吃晚飯。

The difference between them both from this example are:

Mainland Chinese	Taiwanese Mandarin
The character 著 is used within the sentence instead of 在 (which exists in the Taiwanese Mandarin counterpart.)	The character 在 is used instead of 著 (from Mainland Chinese) which is not present in this version of the sentence.
The positioning of the character 吃 is placed second within the sentence following 我.	The positioning of the character 吃 is placed third within the sentence following 在.

I mean, can this analogy also be present between British English & American English regarding their word or letter placement being switched between both variants (not spelling)?

Also, between Taiwanese Mandarin & Mainland Chinese, it does change in phonology despite some sentences containing the same vocabulary or word used within the sentence.
EG. "I want to eat 10 bars of chocolate and drink 10 glasses of juice.".

• China: 我要吃十塊巧克力，還要喝十杯果汁。
• Taiwan: 我要吃十塊巧克力，還要喝十杯果汁。

Highlighted Hanzi - the phonology of 十 changes:

• China: shí
• Taiwan: sí

Does this also occur between British & American English?

In hindsight:

• From the viewpoint of British English, are you still able to distinguish if an English speaker uses American English vocabulary in the UK, would it look out of place?
• Akin to Taiwanese & Mainland Chinese: Is it possible for English (UK) & English (US) to have their word positionings or letter arrangements swapped?

My husband (40) and I (30) have been married for two years. In the beginning it was great, got married after dating for 4 months. Still getting to know each other. On my part I’ve realized that it was too fast to jump in head first without thinking. At first things were great, getting to know each other and party a lot. As time went on, I wasn’t accomplishing anything because of being hungover for days. So I chilled out for a bit. Unfortunately my husband didn’t. I started to notice a few things I was clouded on, like his drug use and drinking and irresponsibility with money.
First year we traveled a lot. I was always worried about money, because I didn’t from it but he does. He stated he never really traveled because of work so he wanted to share this experience together. Me, I’m a cheap traveler, as long as I get to my destination, I don’t care for being comfortable. But he did, and spent SO MUCH MONEY on ridiculous things. I told him to chill out and try my way, he said no. Then comes the buying unnecessary things, he told me not to worry, but of course I did. Last thing I wanted his family to think is that I’m a gold digger and was spending his money. And unfortunately that’s how people think of me because he plays the victim when it comes to his friends and family.
Second year….shit hits the fan. Stock market crashes and he’s running out of money. I had a really hard time getting a job, I maxed out all my cc’s because I never wanted to ask for money. So he helped me out with food and little things, also mentioning you have to pay me back.

• (In the beginning I refused to take money and when I did, I’d always pay him back. With how my father would throw it my face when I needed money left a bad taste in my mouth, so I hate asking for money. I rather struggle and work my ass off before asking anyone.)

So he begins running out of money. I suggest that he speaks to his family and explain our situation. He does, but with strings attached. I worked my ass off for a couple months, helping with food and essential. Occasionally taking us out to dinner. Because I’ve always felt bad that I wasn’t the bread winner in the beginning. I gave money for bills and other things. He’s a bartender so the stocks are where he made most of his money. Because I was so busy with work, I didn’t notice that bills weren’t being paid. I finally opened the letters and turned out rent and bills for 5 months and of course I completely lost it. And I eventually found out money was spent on drugs and alcohol. Partying with whoever. Literally right finding all this shit out, I get pregnant. It was a glimmer of hope because I was ready to be a parent and become more responsible. Willing to bust my ass for my baby and even considered leaving him. His drug addiction didn’t stop, it got worse. And unfortunately I miscarried. As much as he said he was ready to be a father he wasn’t. My mom was so happy but his parents weren’t because their concern was his irresponsibly to be an adult.
Now it’s May tomorrow. 8 months due in rent and bills. I refused to give him any money because he shoved it up his nose the last time. I’ve picked up some of the bills and started saving. I’m in a better financial situation for myself but he on the other hand has gone backwards.
I’ve tried to help him, forced him to do therapy but that was done quick. Told him outpatient, he did it for a couple weeks and backed out. He does drugs with ppl at his job and sleeps all day. Says he does a lot for me when it comes to cleaning but cleans one day then messes everything up and it takes him weeks to do his clothes. I know this is fucked up but the only time he changes is when I threaten to divorce or stay at my grandparents house for a couple of days. But then makes empty promises and does nothing. I can’t help someone who can’t help themselves. I just don’t know what to do. So I’m here to see if anyone has been in my position so I won’t feel so alone.
PS: if I went into a deep dive on all the shit we’ve been through, ppl will say I should’ve left a long time ago. I truly do love him and this is my first marriage but I’m so lost.

For context, my boyfriend has only ever dated 3 people, myself included. The ex in question was his only friend at one point when he was about 14-15 and then later on they became bf/gf and he lost his virginity to her. They lived together, traveled outside of the country together- and now apparently they are “completely platonic”. Even after their break up, he dated another girl, and dated me for over a year and somehow still has some of her stuff (we got rid of it) and letters and notes from her. To top it off, he’s incredibly defensive of her if I call her annoying, or not someone I want to hang out with. In the beginning of our relationship she would call all of the time- about once a week or so- and now it’s down to about two times a month. It always puts me on edge and makes my stomach twist. We are at a point in our relationship where we have a house together, are planning for the future, and even if we only ever get dinner with them once a month- (he would prefer 2-3x a month) I honestly don’t think I can do it. maybe I’m emotionally immature but I just don’t understand how you can go from finding them incredibly attractive to thinking of them “like they’re a sister” During these dinners, if I’m not actively making conversation with her, or genuinely happy to be there he gets really upset with me and will usually tell me to “get over it”. But the truth is I’m not happy when I’m there, and creating a relationship with her isn’t something I want. I don’t want her in my (maybe future) kids lives, or at my wedding, or any of the above. My boyfriend thinks I’m being an asshole because she hasn’t “done anything to me” but I honestly am living to short of a life to engage with people I have no desire to connect with.

I'm 37 years old. I have a masters in special education and a bachelors in liberal studies. I've been in education since 2012. I have 8 years of teaching experience, 6 of it as a special education teacher, and 2 of it as an Alternative teacher (working with kids who were expelled).
So, I've read some jobs up on Linked In, and it seems I have a lot of the skills companies want, but probably not the experience. How do I get in?
Currently I'm crafting my cover letter. Getting a little help to get it started with Chat GPT (not going to use much of what it writes, just needed something to get me moving faster). The goal with this is to sell them on the idea that my education background is actually a strength and has given me lots of great skills that can be applied in the corporate world.
Will I have to know somebody to get in? Because I might know some people. My kids do go to a private school where most people are rich, and I've made a couple of friends with different dads. I also have some college buddies who live in different states who all work in the private sector.
What are your guys' thoughts?
I also make currently make $51k working as an Alternative teacher, and I wouldn't want to start at less than that.

Hi there hoping to see if I can get any guidance. I am in the final, worst stage of this whole situation. Context: sued my apartment complex for damage charges against us that didn’t happen. They withheld payment, we sued, went to court, and won by default.
Question: I have now wrote a demand letter via email, and mail— to the registered agent, corporate, and as many other random contacts I could find from corporate via email. In the letter, I requested payment within 10 days and I have now surpassed that time and heard nothing. Help…. What next? This is happening in the state of Florida.
Please dumb it down for me, I have no law degree and have gone through this whole process with hours of googling and learning the law. I just want my money they are withholding! Thank you in advance.

This is my first year out of college. Now being completely honest, I majored in dance and business, I knew dance was not the career to become rich with but I do value my own happiness. I got a salaried position that is half remote. I teach for 20 hours and then do administrative work for the other 20. The company I work for is pretty big with corporate schools all around the world.
My rent alone is over half my income. I live in an expensive area but I already commute an hour to work every day. I wanted to move to a cheaper area but it would have made my commute go up another hour with morning traffic. I have had to pick up 2 more jobs to make ends meet and still be able to save for the future so I don’t get caught out. Maybe I am just being naive but this doesn’t sit well with me. I see my higher ups in beautiful houses on our zoom meetings and I’m sitting here eating butter pasta for breakfast lunch and dinner. Please help me out. I feel so lost entering the work place like this. Do I ask for a raise? WHAT DO I DO? With my three jobs I’m working/commuting from 8am to 11pm every day, I’m exhausted. I do like my jobs and I’m happy but i am so so tired. I don’t have time to cook, sleep, go to the dentist, get groceries, etc..

Seriously, AO3 was created because of overzealous IP holders and people like Anne Rice who C&D’d fanfic writers all the time, and Im not talking about people making money off of fanfiction either, even sharing a story on the early internet you poured your heart and soul into for other members of your fandom to read could get you a letter. It got so bad people were resorting to sharing fics through tight-knit email groups and IM chatrooms out of fear of getting taken down. I dont think AO3’s team has a lot of power in the grand scheme of things, but their thing is their lawyers fight FOR creative freedom instead of against it and the site provides a safe space for fanfiction writers.
Why is there nothing like this for fan game creators, or even anything protecting fans from petty corporations? So many innocent fan projects like Pokemon Brick Bronze and other fan games of various franchises have gotten C&D’d for no other reason than “This is mine and I am big company who has money to stop you and the archaic copyright laws say I can”. Steel Wool Games and Scott Cawthon actually have the right attitude about this, his stance is that fans won’t and should not be punished unless they are making money or doing something like creating a 1:1 remake of an existing FNAF game. I believe Toby Fox is of a similar opinion.
​
Its not just fan games either, Fair Use practically doesn’t exist anymore and Youtube is proof. So the question is, why isn’t there an updated version of Fair Use or something similar that is more solid and actually protects fans and non-profit fan content?

We are doing a plated dinner and giving our guests a choice between chicken, steak, or vegetarian option. Our venue has requested place cards at each seat indicating which meal option the guest has chosen. I’ve seen ideas on Pinterest where people just put a letter like C or V but I was hoping to do something a little bit prettiemore creative. Just trying to get some ideas from anyone else who has done this! Thanks!

Update to this post I made a couple of months ago:
https://www.reddit.com/AITAH/s/ZNnq2852Iu
This is long and rambling so the tl/dr version is: in therapy, and things are the same or maybe worse.
I took all of the comments to heart, particularly the critical ones. I met with two divorce lawyers that week to chat through what the divorce could look like. At the time I didn’t expect it to be contentious but I just wanted to know what the process would be. We have our house and some other assets in trust, and we’ve been together so long that I wasn’t sure how simple it would be tonight unwind. I love the house and I was the one who did most of the design and renovation, so my plan was to offer to buy him out of it if it came to that.
Sat husband down and told him that I met with lawyers, and he said “I know.” Turns out he’s been tracking me on Find My almost nonstop 24/7, and that one of the offices was the only address he didn’t recognize as one of my usual haunts so he drove by it. I didn’t ask about the second one I saw, but it’s next to a big shopping mall we frequent so I think he must have just assumed that’s where I was. I asked if he thought I was having an affair and he replied with, “No, I know you’re not.” Well yeah, because you’re tracking me. I guess.
Anyway, he said he knew this was coming, and wanted to do whatever it took to fix things. I told him I don’t know if that’s going to be possible, but at a minimum I would need: 1. Couples counseling for us. 2. At least one visit to a sex therapist. 3. Individual therapy for him. 4. For him to sort out his health (follow the new diet from the endocrinologist, take the meds he’s been prescribed, use the CPAP consistently, etc.).
I told him I would be with him every step of the way and support him in all of it, but nothing was going to happen unless he took initiative. I also asked what he needed from me and all he said was “No more talk of breaking up or divorce.” I said ok to this, and also told him that I knew he hated administrative tasks like making appointments and getting insurance approvals, I could help with all of those things, even his.
At first he agreed with the plan and vehemently insisted that he was on board. Finding an available LMFT with an appointment was not easy but I managed to find one that was in network and they had an opening two days later. Husband hemmed and hawed about going because it was “so soon”. Then he said “It’s a woman, so you and she will just gang up on me.” I canceled that appointment and it wasn’t easy, but I found a male therapist who could squeeze us in for the following week. I found a different male therapist for him to see alone, but that appointment was 3 weeks out. I also made a follow up endocrinologist appointment for him and that hasn’t happened yet, and he still hasn’t filled his prescriptions or started the diet.
On the day of the therapy appointment which was 6 pm on a Thursday, I'm in the waiting room 10 minutes before the appointment when my husband texts, "emergency at work. be there a little late." This man has had the same job for 23 years and the only time that there was an emergency that would have required him to stay that late was when someone literally died. The therapist comes out and introduces himself, I go in, and when I explain the situation he tells me that he's seen a partner get cold feet about therapy many times. I'm embarrassed and self conscious about it but he assures me there's nothing to be upset about, it's not my fault, and would I like to proceed and chat without my husband. I call my husband and put him on speakerphone. He says he can only talk for a few minutes and has to run for this mysterious emergency. I start crying and I hang up on him, and then spend the rest of the time telling the therapist why I am pushing for counseling in the first place. The entire session was basically me vomiting words and crying. I would like to say it was cathartic, but it wasn't. It was just sad to hear it all out loud for the first time. I come home, and husband is waiting with dinner. I ignore him, pack a bag, and head to middle child's apartment. I end up spending the weekend there while I try to sort out what to do. Husband texts me frequently but mostly leaves me alone. Middle child has a heart to heart with him but they end up arguing and that situation itself gets strained, which unfortunately hasn’t improved. Husband thinks middle child plays favorites. It is true, but husband hasn’t been helping that situation.
On Monday when I'm in the office, I get an email from the therapy practice that a new appointment has been made for the following evening. Husband took the initiative to make the appointment. I go home Monday night, and a long apology letter is written out to me, and he's left me a necklace as a gift. My husband is a terrible gift giver - he spends money like it's going out of style but none of his gifts are thoughtful or made with the person in mind, but this is a specific necklace that I bookmarked so at first I was pleasantly surprised. Then I realized that the only way he'd know about the necklace was from the bookmark, so yeah, he's also snooping through my Macbook. The therapy appointment is the following day so I just ignore him when he comes home, sleep in a guest room, and ignore him the following morning. We go to therapy that night, and my husband actually participates and answers questions. This session goes fine, and we have one later in the week which is fine too. I'm not seeing any immediate changes, but you know, Rome wasn't built in a day, so I'm going to be patient. Meanwhile, the therapist gives us the info for a sex therapist and highly encourages us to make an appointment, which I do right away. We see the sex therapist that weekend, and I'm still in the guest bedroom and nowhere near ready to have sex, but the therapist encourages me to move forward with the prompts/homework for sex for that week. I go back into our bedroom that night (just for sleep) and we follow the prompts the following night and have what is without a close second the best sex we have had ever. Seriously, over 2 decades, and it was the most satisfying sexual experience I have ever had. I was walking on a cloud for days.
That bubble popped the following week. We were still going to see the couples therapist twice a week, his individual therapy appointment was next week, and we had another appointment with the sex therapist the next month. Not much has changed in the day to day but again, I'm being patient. My husband actually initiates sex one night, and as we are getting into it, he says, "Can we go back to regular sex now?" Because for him, "regular" sex where he gets off and I don't was just peachy. I start to cry, and now he's holding me and I swear he's almost relieved to be off the hook and not have to have sex at all. Middle child wanted to go to a concert that was out of town and asked if I'd dogsit the new puppy, so instead of just going over there for a few hours a day like I'd been planning, I packed a bag and ended up spending almost a week there and let middle child have some more time on vacation. Husband texted, called, and showed up every day but I wouldn't talk to him or let him in, and only saw him at therapy sessions. The therapy sessions end up being a waste of time, with my husband half admitting that he has unaddressed problems, but not really willing to change any behaviors. The therapist was super patient but I could feel an undercurrent of exasperation, like...what is it you people are trying to save? Husband is a stew of repression, insecurity, health issues, Madonna-Whore complexes, and unaddressed childhood trauma. He's so averse to confrontation that he would literally buy his way out of a difficult conversation if given the choice. Nothing will change as long as he's unwilling to work on that.
I move back in, and I even move back into the bedroom. Husband ended up skipping individual therapy because "Isn't two sessions a week enough?" Didn't even cancel, he just didn't go. Went back once to the sex therapist, but with a borderline catatonic look on his face and didn't say or do much the entire time other than nod. I've been back at home, going through the motions of life. Husband initiates sex constantly and I go along with it, but have only gotten off twice in about 12 or 15 times (and I am no longer faking it). Husband is so happy because as far as he's concerned, everything is fine even when I tell him it's not. I know the right thing to do is to just divorce, but I feel so messed up in the head that I just want to throw a proverbial grenade into my life and like cheat by bringing a guy home or something. That's it. No happy ending (no pun intended), no unhappy unending. Just limbo.

Does anyone else's manager throw an absolute FIT over up time since we've been able to control turning of channels?? We get frequent callouts, and personally I've only ever turned it off for brief periods when we're 20+ minutes behind, which is terrible for the customer experience and what it's meant for (plus the baristas don't deserve that stress with people furious at them, but corporate doesn't care about that part).
Yet, each week since this rollout, our manager prints the sheet. On the average week, our mobile is over 99% up time and 98-100% delivery up time. These numbers are highlighted, and written in sharpie next to it are notes in all capital letters scolding us. We calculated it, and it's an average of 6 minutes a day it's down for us. 6 minutes to make everyone so much less stressed, both customers and baristas, and improve literally everyone's experience. Is anyone else's manager like this??

My ex-spouse and I rented a unit in Quebec in a building owned by a big corporation (CAPREIT). Our lease was up on November 30th 2022. The lease was under my name and my ex-spouse’s.
I purchased a home and moved out in October 2022. My ex-spouse remained in the unit until the end of the lease.
We never received a notice of renewal prior to vacating the premises (which later was said to have been sent to my e-mail address which to this day I cannot find). We had tried to get a hold of a superintendent on the premises, and a representative on numerous occasions by phoning and showing up to a designated office (outside of the property we were living at) to announce our non-renewal notice. We were not aware of the legal procedure required by the Tribunal Administratif du Logement (TAL). My ex-spouse sent a notice by email that we would not renew on November 17th 2022 (around 2 weeks before the lease expiry date).
The day my ex left the apartment, we spoke to a representative who (finally) was in the building who told us to leave the keys in the apartment, which we did. We told said representative we were leaving. None of our attempts (email, phone etc.) were successful as we could never speak to anyone who managed the property, and were either never answered/returned or instead transfered to a designated person who we were told on multiple occasions was supposed to get back to us but never did.
I have received a notice of late payment on December 15th 2022 and again in January 2023. I have replied to both emails, cc’ing property managers and employees to advise we vacated the unit since the lease expiry date (no response). Finally in January 2023 after my last email of that month, a representative calls us advising that our payment was late so I took the opportunity of finally having a representative on the phone to tell them again that we vacated the premises. All and all it was a back and forth with them telling me they sent the notice of renewal in July 2022 to which I responded I still could not find, and me asking what the next steps were…because at the end of the day, we are not living there anymore! They promised to get back to me on January 19th 2023 with an update. They never did. On January 19th 2023 I sent a last and final email stating I still have not received an update to which the company never responded to, to this day.
Fast forward to April 29th 2024 where I receive a Collection email from the TAL, stating that we owe rent payments to CAPREIT. They are stating that CAPREIT’s records of sending the email of renewal is sufficient proof that the notice of renewal was received and despite all of our attempts to notify the (unreachable) company, we did not follow the legal procedure to advise that we will not renew the lease (which according to their website should be under the form of a signed letter) and we therefore are liable.
Any advice on the next steps we should take?
Thanks in advance.

Children quarrel with each other in other DWJ books, often for comedic effect. Fire and Hemlock shows how unchecked immaturity can play out to a devastating degree. It’s not as fanciful as Gwendolyn burning her little brother’s lives away or Christopher disappearing into another universe in a huff. These events are grounded in reality, in a way that could easily happen to you or the children in your life.
These stupid, avoidable, painful interactions felt so real. Feelling Polly’s hurt and wondering what was going to go wrong next was an absolutely grippping reading experience.
The very first page introduces us to the frenemy-ship between Polly and Nina. They start out in an innocent, idyllic way: relying on each other; loving each other; going on imaginative whimsical adventures; which to fight and quick to forgive. Polly admires Nina so much, and Nina seems to make every situation more colorful and exciting.
Then comes the ugly process of growing apart. Their friendship breaks and comes together several times, weaker every time. Nina, probably jealous of Polly, tries to knock her down a peg by telling everyone in the school that Polly comes from a broken home. The betrayal! Polly’s pridefullness never lets her show how Nina has hurt her or make a sincere move to reconcile.
When Polly wants to slip into that comfortable, familiar friendship again, she just acts like she isn’t mad or that the quarrel never happened. Buried hatchets are still sharp! Perhaps if Polly had confronted Nina with her heart in her sleeve, Nina would have given a genuine apology, and the girls could have grown truly close again, instead of just being “thrown upon each other’s company in the absence of better options.”
Meanwhile, as the girls’ personalities develop, Nina grows into someone that Polly no longer admires or even respects. The Reader painfully experiences the death of this friendship alongside Polly. The girls really loved each other at one time, and it fell apart—what a shame!
And what can I say about put the total failure to parent in this book? I’ll start with Polly’s father. He slinks around, acting afraid of every woman in his life, “standing for nothing, falling for everything” as they say. He disappears from Polly’s life without communicating why he has gone. Polly worries that he has died! He half-heartedly sent letters, but when he got no answers, he didn’t seriously try to visit his daughter, check on her, or reassure her. Truthfully, he was sniffing after another woman, his wife found out, and she threw him out. He made many half-hearted attempts to get back together with his wife and blustered about his “rights as a father,” but he never did the work to assert those rights. He never prepared a home for Polly or legally pursued 50/50 guardianship. Like so many divorced dads, he sang the song of “My ex is keeping my kid from me!” when “I aimlessly wandered away from my kid” is closer to the truth. It was easier for him to pursue a new life, moving into Johanna’s home in far-off Brighton, than to rent a flat closer to Polly.
Her dad’s lack-of-fucks-to-give are not clear to Polly until her mother throws her out. She sends her to live with her father. Communication fails again when Polly doesn’t at first know whether her father has been informed that this is forever, not just a visit. Too scared to ask directly, she says “What school shall I be going to in Brighton?” and he answers, “We’ll see about all that later,” evading the question, but showing he understands the situation.
Johanna makes it clear that Polly’s visit is a burden—her home is fastidiously clean, she refers to children as “almost as messy as pets,” and she refuses to let Polly help with the washing up. She asks Polly over their second dinner, “When are you going home?” Polly looks furtively at her shame-faced father and realizes that he has not discussed the situation with Johanna at all. He has not advocated for Johanna to open her home to Polly. Instead, he passively hoped that things would work out. Polly is so ashamed and let down, she tries the ol “you can’t fire me, I quit” defense. She says she’s going home in the morning, and her father has the gall to look relieved! He does not question her or support her at all! He doesn’t even help her buy a train ticket home or contact anyone to pick her up. He just lets his young daughter walk off: stranded, phoneless and penniless in an unfamiliar city.
The immaturity of Polly’s father is rivaled by that of her mother. If you’ll excuse my very 2020’s reading of an old story, Ivy acts like she has Borderline Personality Disorder. She runs hot and cold with every important person in her life. She adores her husband until his betrayal, then she hates him implacably. She repeats this pattern with a string of romantic interests, eventually turning on each of them when she suspects (rationally or irrationally) that they have betrayed her. I found it particularly relatable when Ivy chided her daughter for not buying “the lodger” (Ivy’s boyfriend) a Christmas present. She had never communicated with her daughter that she was dating the lodger—only indirectly showing it by lavishing him with huge meals and presents, while neglecting her daughter’s basic needs. How was Polly to know the new pecking order and the new expectations? Once Polly does warm up to the lodger, as it seemed Ivy wanted her to, Ivy flew into a rage and accused the two of them of conspiring against her. She even implied the man and child were sleeping together. Ivy’s implacable side was turned on Polly then, and the girl was thrown out.
With casual cruelty, Ivy made it clear every day that Polly was not a priority. She didn’t lock Polly in a tower, she just took away her bedroom so she could rent it out. She didn’t tear up her clothes like Cinderella’s evil stepsisters, she just passively never checked if Polly had outgrown something or needed replacements. When Polly asked her to attend school events, Ivy would express frankly that they were boring. She described the Christmas play as a punishment for her ex-husband “For if I have to attend, he should have to suffer there as well.” Polly asked her a few times over several months about attending a later theater performance, and several times Ivy evaded the question. Polly did not take the hint until her mother exploded with anger. She declared she’d done more than her part by attending when Polly was in juniors, and now she was done attending forever.
Ivy always had something to say about her personal suffering and would wax poetic about her “happiness” and how “everyone has a right to their happiness.” Yet she was quite blind to anyone’s needs but her own. She deprived her daughter of her room, of well-fitting clothes, of an emotional connection, of her father (to a point), and ultimately of physical safety.
When her child was grown, Ivy seemed only more comfortable heaping verbal abuse on her, yet she could not understand why Polly did not eagerly spend time with her. “You make it hard for anyone to feel sorry for you,” Polly finally surmised.
This book was a lesson about the pitfalls of living a life without maturity. Communication, sincerity, introspection, kindness, anger management, and decisiveness would have made all the difference here!

My ex-spouse and I rented a unit in Quebec in a building owned by a big corporation (CAPREIT). Our lease was up on November 30th 2022. The lease was under my name and my ex-spouse’s.
I purchased a home and moved out in October 2022. My ex-spouse remained in the unit until the end of the lease.
We never received a notice of renewal prior to vacating the premises (which later was said to have been sent to my e-mail address which to this day I cannot find). We had tried to get a hold of a superintendent on the premises, and a representative on numerous occasions by phoning and showing up to a designated office (outside of the property we were living at) to announce our non-renewal notice. We were not aware of the legal procedure required by the Tribunal Administratif du Logement (TAL). My ex-spouse sent a notice by email that we would not renew on November 17th 2022 (around 2 weeks before the lease expiry date).
The day my ex left the apartment, we spoke to a representative who (finally) was in the building who told us to leave the keys in the apartment, which we did. We told said representative we were leaving. None of our attempts (email, phone etc.) were successful as we could never speak to anyone who managed the property, and were either never answered/returned or instead transfered to a designated person who we were told on multiple occasions was supposed to get back to us but never did.
I have received a notice of late payment on December 15th 2022 and again in January 2023. I have replied to both emails, cc’ing property managers and employees to advise we vacated the unit since the lease expiry date (no response). Finally in January 2023 after my last email of that month, a representative calls us advising that our payment was late so I took the opportunity of finally having a representative on the phone to tell them again that we vacated the premises. All and all it was a back and forth with them telling me they sent the notice of renewal in July 2022 to which I responded I still could not find, and me asking what the next steps were…because at the end of the day, we are not living there anymore! They promised to get back to me on January 19th 2023 with an update. They never did. On January 19th 2023 I sent a last and final email stating I still have not received an update to which the company never responded to, to this day.
Fast forward to April 29th 2024 where I receive a Collection email from the TAL, stating that we owe rent payments to CAPREIT. They are stating that CAPREIT’s records of sending the email of renewal is sufficient proof that the notice of renewal was received and despite all of our attempts to notify the (unreachable) company, we did not follow the legal procedure to advise that we will not renew the lease (which according to their website should be under the form of a signed letter) and we therefore are liable.
Any advice on the next steps we should take?
Thanks in advance.