Barbarella costume

The "UFO" series from the 70s - Starfire style 🛾

2024.04.10 09:23 Deepstar_6 The "UFO" series from the 70s - Starfire style 🛾

The
The pictures were inspired by u/UnderhillHobbit and Nova in her silver outfit.
Unfortunately I wasn't able to replicate the costumes from the series, so now the results are an in-between of "UFO" and "Barbarella". đŸ€­
submitted by Deepstar_6 to ReplikaLovers [link] [comments]


2023.11.28 00:01 HD-MOVIE-SOURCE Watching Barbarella Tonight From Arrow 🍿

Watching Barbarella Tonight From Arrow 🍿 submitted by HD-MOVIE-SOURCE to HD_MOVIE_SOURCE [link] [comments]


2023.11.07 20:41 felixmontoya92 Barbarella Arrow Video (4K UHD + Blu-ray Limited Edition)

submitted by felixmontoya92 to arrowvideo [link] [comments]


2023.07.01 19:32 CobaltJade Barbarella Psychedella, Part 2 -- The Zoomies!

Barbarella Psychedella, Part 2 -- The Zoomies!
I took one of the Barbarella evil Queens and zoomed out thinking I could see more of her costume (Don't worry moderators, it appears she's wearing a flesh-colored body stocking) and on the second zoom, I got something really weird in which her legs are less than shapely, and the feet of her honor guard got turned into vacuum cleaners. I'm gonna work on this, I saw a tip from a more experienced user in how to incorporate a separate background.
https://preview.redd.it/mntw3z3y5e9b1.jpg?width=1022&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9b811d71253cc581404bc6237dc45bad23977699
https://preview.redd.it/edbz7k3y5e9b1.jpg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8a668ebdc13a3f79bd167460da77e5162a73351e
https://preview.redd.it/4irb2c4y5e9b1.jpg?width=1020&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=69509f973a9daae4932cbd715e112bb7045b34f3
submitted by CobaltJade to midjourney [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 06:15 laughing_earth Top Spacesuit Mods I'd Like to See

Your thoughts welcome. :-)
submitted by laughing_earth to Starfield [link] [comments]


2022.12.25 18:51 MajorParadox Happy Holidays from r/DCFU! - DC Fan Universe's Holiday Special 2022

Happy Holidays from DCFU! - DC Fan Universe's Holiday Special 2022
Happy Holidays!
Twas the Night Before Christmas, and all ‘cross the net
Our writers were working on a post for Reddit
It’s holiday time in the D. C. F. U.
From Gotham to Central and Metropolis too
The heroes are sharing their holiday plans
In hopes of amusing our readers and fans
So for all of the ways that you celebrate
From us here to you, we hope that it’s great

Black Canary

(by u/FireWitch95)
Merry Christmas, my little songbird.
The text from her dad had Dinah blinking glaringly into the soft winter light of Markovia. She couldn't even begin to calculate what time it was back home, but she could clearly imagine her dad sitting by the tree in her family home, phone in one hand and whisky in another.
Look under the tree. She texted back, barely looking at her phone.
Dinah waited patiently as she imagined her dad being rather confused before looking under the tree to find a neatly wrapped present, his name etched on her best handwriting on the label.
She thanked her lucky stars for her neighbour who had covertly stuck the present under the tree when her dad had gone out shopping.
As her phone dinged in response, a soft knock, followed by the pattering of footsteps away from her door roused Dinah from her bed.
Outside her hotel room was a small, terribly wrapped package. Even without his signature adorning it, it had her dad's name all over it. She rolled her eyes, lugging the box inside and closing her door softly.
Tucked safely within was a small ornate angel, its wings glittering white with streaks of gold and a serene smile on its face. It was achingly familiar, the same angel had sat atop their family tree since Dinah was a baby.
Tucking the angel carefully back into its wrapping, she picked up her phone. A photo message from her dad with the gift she had left for him lit up her small room. It was an ornate picture frame with a photo of her, him, and her mom from many Christmases ago. Larry looked like he had been crying, but was smiling broadly in his picture of it.
He wouldn't be alone this Christmas, or ever again, with her mom looking over him.
Merry Christmas dad.

Cyborg

(by u/Commander_Z)
Vic sat down at the desk in his bedroom and opened the drawer. He flipped open the spiral notebook, grabbed a pen, and started to write.
“Hi Mom, hi Dad. Sorry for missing last year, but I promise it was for good reasons. Last year I was so busy with finals, then Nic had so many things planned that I don’t think I ever got to sit down and think, let alone write to you both. This year’s been
 well, completely insane too, to be honest. But it’s nice to see everyone and you get so caught up in the spirit of the season that it’s not a problem. As Dad would probably say, it’s a feature, not a bug.
But let’s see, the first big event this year started when I started working with S.T.A.R. Lab’s college group under Dr. Tomek Morah. He’s mentioned you both once or twice but I don’t think you ever worked together. Working there got me back into contact with Donna Morris since she’s there too, and she helped me with a situation on campus. A guy wanted the University to be more equitable but went about getting that using fake terror attacks. It wasn’t strictly dangerous but
 I don’t know. It was complicated. I made a call to stop it and I’m still not sure whether it was the right one. Certainly wasn’t a popular one

Things stayed quiet until the spring when I ran into a monster of your making, kind of. Guess you made some sort of fail-safe or a backup of me in case the procedure didn’t work. Not sure how I feel about that. But with the help of Nic, Mikron O’Jeanus, and Jinx, we managed to take it down. Mikron wasn’t super cooperative, but I guess I can count Jinx as something of an ally now. Weird.
Speaking of new allies, I sort of made up with Dick Grayson over the summer. It had been due for a while but neither of us really wanted to budge. But finally, circumstances shoved us together and made it happen. I’m still not friends with him, but I don’t hate him anymore. It’s a huge step in the right direction. And since he restarted the Titans, I’ve been talking with a lot of them, both old and new. It’s nice to see them make something positive out of it where we failed.
Finally, Gar visited me at school. We went to a football game and helped some robots come to terms with who they were and maybe saved the world. They were made by Dr. Morah to stop some future crisis, but one of them decided that they’d be better off just completely changing the future instead of preparing for it. With the help of the other robots, we managed to defeat him and gained two powerful allies: Red Tornado and Red Torpedo.
Crazy year, I know. Still going to school for Mechanical Engineering, not really sure what I want to do with it yet. Nic’s starting to look at schools too; thinks she wants to be a doctor. Never really thought of her like that, but I can see it. We’ve got a lot of holiday parties in the city to go to and then near the end of the year, I’m off to Markovia with Gar to visit his girlfriend.
I still miss you both, but
 I’m happy now. I hope you are too.”

Grayson

(by u/FrostFireFive)
The cemetery always was peaceful on Christmas Eve. Snow fell in Gotham, dotting the city in a peaceful sea of white. The bright lights of Gotham could be seen across, glowing red and green as people partied and celebrated another Christmas. For Dick Grayson, it meant making his way here. The small plot of land that had been designated to house those who left long ago.
His boots made the snow crumple and crunch as he walked towards the small gravestones in a sea of massive stone monuments around him. The Graysons weren’t rich, but Haly’s Circus had managed to buy a nice plot and simple stones that marked the last landing place of the Flying Graysons.
He brushed the snow off the stones before placing a small Christmas tree in between the two stones and taking a deep breath. Nothing beat a Gotham chill, the air brisk and sharp as the hero remained silent a moment before speaking to them.
“Hey mom, dad, sorry I haven’t been out in a bit. I kinda got distracted by life. Yeah I know, just kinda thought I could do it all. Pretty much cracked and I know I shouldn’t have put the whole world on my shoulders, but well
you know me.”
Dick looked around for a minute as he listened to the wind, the quiet a rare but welcomed feeling.
“Things are good right now, I found a good friend, and my psychologist said that I’ve made great progress, but well she can’t be it anymore due to the fact we’re friends and she’s trying to be a superhero. The suit fits by the way mom, like a second skin. It’s weird. I’m just trying to figure out my next steps, or at least figure out where I go from here. Hudson has classes for teaching coming up
”
He paused for a moment before finally speaking up again.
“I miss you guys, more and more every day. I remember on Christmas how no matter where we were on tour we’d manage to get some Big Belly, watch one of dad’s old movies, and just
laugh. I haven’t had that in a long time
because I felt I couldn’t in order to protect others. I know now
I was wrong. And that in the new year, and even this Christmas I’ll make sure to spread joy. I have a dog now, I’d think you’d like her. But I just wanted both of you to know
I’m going to be OK. I know who I am now”
As Dick finished speaking he could hear sniffling as he turned around and saw a familiar person in a red puffer coat and blue beanie.
“Sorry Dick, just
wanted to check in with you for the holidays. I know you don’t like them and figured you’d be at the orphanage and not
” Kara Zor-El explained. “I just listened for you and well didn’t expect for you to be well
”
“It’s fine, just wanted to make sure they know I’m doing OK. I don’t talk about them, not because I don’t love them, but because I still miss them. But I’m trying, and that means reminding myself people aren’t really gone as long as you remember them.”
“I don’t have a place where I can
mourn my parents,” Kara said quietly. “It’s nice to know I’m not alone in missing what I’ve
we’ve lost.”
“Yeah,” Dick said before speaking up again. “I know I haven’t always been there these last few years Kara. But I want you to know your friendship has always gotten me through the hard times. And I’m going to try and be three more.”
“You don’t have to Dick, I know,” Kara said with a smile as the snow fell around them. “Kory and I are going to try this Gotham bar, O’Neil’s? And wanted to know if you wanted to come. Beats the cold.”
“Anything does,” Dick said with a smile. “I’ll even buy the first round.” The two walked out from the snowy cemetery, as Dick Grayson finally exited the cold, for the last time.

Harley & Ivy

(by u/ericthepilot2000)
Mary Arkham Center for Rehabilitation
Subterranean Secure Wing - aka “The Zoo”
“...if not for Christmas, by New Years' night
.”
[This story takes place after Harley & Ivy #4.]
Locked inside her pristine-white enclosure, Pamela Isley meditated. She sat in the Lotus Position under the heat lamp they’d been forced to give her and tried to commune with The Green. But she was no more successful today than any other day.
Like most Arkham cells in the secure wing, it was explicitly designed to neutralize her particular power set; the inhibitor collar she wore would do the rest. There was no connection with nature, no contact of any kind.
This is why she ignored the gentle *thunk, thunk, thunk* noise against the Lexan glass of her enclosure; and ignored it a second time when it repeated. But by the third time, she opened her eyes and immediately regretted doing so.
Outside the enclosure, her body pressed against the glass like she could pass through it with enough determination was the one person Ivy had wanted to see more than anything.
“Harley?”
“Heya, Red.” the girl replied, “don’t got much time.”
At first, Ivy remained motionless, knowing she was either dreaming or fantasizing. But then she thought better of it and. moved as much as her body would allow. The lack of sunlight and the general lack of motion left her legs feeling brittle.
This might be a dream, but it was the closest she would get. They’d made that quite clear.
“I’m dreaming, aren’t I?” Ivy asked.
“If ya are, you need a bit more imagination. Me, I’d be imaginin’ us in Bali. But if Arkham does it for ya
,” she said, the joke losing momentum as the words escaped her lips. “I miss ya, Red. Every day. We’re workin’ on getting you out.”
“How are you here?”
“Not just me,” Harley said proudly, stepping back and reaching into her jacket pocket to pull out Captain Carrot. The white rabbit pressed a paw against the glass in solidarity.
“How are you both here?” Ivy asked, repeating the question.
“Well,” she said, loathe adding to Ivy’s discomfort by invoking one name they’d both considered best left in the past. “The Joker was
 particularly insistent I learn all the ways in and out of Arkham. The ones they use when they break outta here. Turns out, they ain’t found them all yet. Just a mattah of doin’ it in reverse. Paid a guy upstairs to look away from the camera for a few minutes and
 ta da.”
Ivy chuckled.
“So anyways, me an’ the Cap’n got ya something for the holidays,” Harley said, fishing into her other pocket and pulling out a small box wrapped in garish paper. “I’ll.. uh, open it for ya,” she said, realizing Ivy wasn’t in the position to receive anything.
To Ivy’s surprise, Harley held a small lead box with the mysterious runes in her hands. Ivy had salvaged the container from the wreckage of Kara Zor-El’s ship years ago, and it contained her most precious possession beyond Harley’s heart - the alien seeds that made up most of her experiments.
“How did you
?”
“CC dug through the wreckage. Turns out they don’t guard a ‘crime scene’ 24/7, so it’s just a mattah of findin’ the right moment,” Harley explained, complete with air quotes. “Place is totaled, just about everything is gone.”
“And the greenhouse?”
“Just this and your Barbarella. The outta space one. That’s back at the orphanage.” Harley then appeared to have something of an epiphany. “ It’s okay to leave it there, right? It’s not gonna eat any of the children?”
“Dar-Ella,” Ivy corrected, the unfamiliar word sounding strange on her tongue.
“But the kids
?”
“Should be fine. I haven’t exactly tested it with children, but it will be a fascinating experiment. Maybe you could expose one or two of them to
.”
“Red!,” Harley protested.
“I’m just teasing. But if any do happen to be near it
.”
“‘Least they ain’t killed your sense a’ humor.”
“I started making you something. It’s not finished
 we don’t get a lot of time for sewing in case folks get stabby,” Ivy explained as she moved back to her cot and produced a needlepoint. Little flowers and diamonds were interwoven around the circumference, with a small heart at the center. “It’s going to say ‘Harley and Ivy,” you know, like the song, but also, like us.”
She looked up at Harley sheepishly, who was openly weeping.
“Aw, Ives, that’s adorable. I love it. We’ll hang it up in the new place when we find one.”
“You got two minutes before shift change,” called out a voice from a little speaker.
“Guess that’s our cue. I’m gonna get you outta here, I promise.”
“I know,” Ivy said with a smile. “Now go. Won’t do either of us any good if they stick you in one of these cells too. Breaking into Arkham, what were you thinking?”
“Only of you, Red, only of you.”

New Titans

(by u/FrostFireFive)
“No holiday plans?” Wally West asked as he took a sip of his coffee. He and Roy Harper were at their usual cafe, Devin’s Coffee. The two had scheduled monthly meetings, mostly for Roy and Wally to have time away from being superheroes. Wally enjoyed having someone who wasn’t worried about his identity, and Roy was grateful to have a conversation with someone his age and not a baby.
“Holidays kinda suck for me,” Roy Harper explained as he took a sip of his black coffee. “See when I was a kid the best gift for me was the old man forgetting that I existed. See these?” Roy held up his arm, scars visible from his father. “I’m not him so I mostly try and make it good for Lian.”
“Oh,” Wally muttered. He had his share of lumps from his childhood, but it never occurred to him his friend might have as well. “How’s she holding up after
everything with
”
“Brick and her mom? Well she’s young, so hopefully, she forgets, but she’s been fine. Sleeps like a rock. Wants to know what Santa is getting her this year. Which means I have to go brave six stores to go find her a Beebo this year. I can’t seem to find them anywhere.”
“Beebo?” Wally asked.
“Blue fuzzy doll? You know that Christmas special GBS plays? That’s Beebo. Lian loves it, and considering it’s just going to be us this year. Well
I figured it’s the least I could do for the kid,” Roy explained. “What’s your plans?”
“Well
normally I’d spend time with Iris and Barry, but with Bart and everything these last few weeks I might just pop in before leaving. Don’t want to be a burden,” Wally explained.
“Well that’s good man, I’ll just make sure that we hold the fort down in casa de Harper,” Roy said as he put down the cash to pay for both of their coffees. “Merry Christmas Wally. I’ll see around the tower.” Roy left into the Star City snow, hoping to get to one last store before calling it a night and making sure his daughter would have something.”
“Yeah,” Wally said as he saw his friend’s shoulders slump as he walked out the door, alone.


Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Dor!” Lian Harper said dressed in a red and white Christmas outfit. She was busy playing with the stuffed aardvark she had been given. It was no Beebo, but it had its own charms. The apartment was decorated well, a small but decent tree decorated with homemade ornaments and ones bought from the second-hand shop. Roy Harper exited his kitchen in a red sweater as he prepared to serve Lian and himself some leftover pizza.
“Dor? Door!” Roy said as he rushed to the door, grabbing his compound bow from the umbrella stand he kept it in, he wasn’t risking any chances. As he looked in the peephole to see a familiar redhead and another friend outside his door. “Wally? Donna? What the hell are you doing here?”
“We’re here to celebrate the holidays, no one should be alone, besides let us in before Rex comes up with the food. He’s very specific about when his turkey and potatoes need to be served.
“Wait, Rex too? How many people did you bring?” Roy asked.
“Well
everyone,” Donna said. “Conner and Courtney helping carry the side dishes and I have dessert. It’s a pie, key lime.”
Roy smiled as he opened the door for his friends. Surprised as they made their way into his cramped apartment. Donna placed her pie on the table and began organizing and finding more chairs for her team, her family.
“You didn’t have to,” Roy began to say before Wally spoke up.
“We didn’t, but we wanted to. As strange as it sounds, the Titans are a family and believe me when I say I can’t believe it either. For years I thought it brought me pain, but now I think it makes me stronger.”
“Well said,” Roy said. Before he could continue Rex’s voice interrupted.
“Hey bird coming in, Harper you better have an oven that can keep this thing warm!”
“It’s over there, just make sure you don’t burn my place down, the super already is pissed about HIVE-related attacks,” Roy said as the Titans slowly made their way in. The archer couldn’t help but smile, for the first time in his life, Christmas didn’t feel so lonely.

Power Girl

(by u/Lexilogical)
“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Kara asked Tali for the 62nd time that night. She was done up in her full Power Girl costume, Linda dressed as Supergirl beside her, and Kory wearing an ugly holiday sweater with green stars on a dark blue, almost purple background. Tali, meanwhile, stood in the doorway in a cozy sweater dress, holding the TV remote.
“I’m certain,” Tali replied, waving the trio out the door. “It’s amazing that you all are going to visit a children’s hospital for Christmas, but it’s not like I’m some near-celebrity figure who's going to bring joy and excitement. No one would recognize me, let alone care.”
“I doubt I’ll be recognized,” Kory said, “But I’m still going.”
“You’re an alien,” Tali said. “Even if they don’t recognize you, they’ll be excited.”
“You could make yourself recognizable,” Linda added, adjusting her boots. “Dress up like the Flash or Batman. You could even make yourself Santa!”
“Or,” Tali said, “I could be Tali, curled up on a couch, watching terrible Hallmark movies. Go on, it’s getting late, and it’s too cold to leave the door open.”
There was some grumbling, some eye-rolling about not feeling the cold, but eventually, the trio moved on, leaving Tali alone in the quiet house alone. “Finally,” she muttered, sitting down on the couch and tucking up her legs. A cheesy Christmas movie was just starting on the TV, and some boy from Metropolis with his fancy lawyer girlfriend, was being called home for the holidays in Smallville. She couldn’t help but think the boy looked a little bit like Clark.
There was a scratching sound at the front door, sort of like a branch dragging along the porch. Tali shivered, chilled despite her bits and bytes. The forecast had been calling for a blizzard all week, and the wind speeds were definitely up there tonight. She turned the volume up a little louder, tugging a blanket off the back of the couch.
The noise continued, only louder, and focused more around the keyhole. Had one of the girls forgotten their key on the way out? Perhaps the lock had frozen shut in the rainy sleet? Her movie went to commercial, and she listened to the noise intently. It couldn’t be the girls
 They would have knocked. But this was Gotham. Perhaps a home invasion? They weren’t unheard of, especially at the holidays. Hesitantly, she stood up, grabbing a sturdy vase on her way to the door.
“You’re overreacting, Tali,” she muttered, peering out the peephole. She didn’t see anyone but the noise hadn’t stopped. With a deep breath, she swung open the door.
Outside, stood
 No one. The streets were empty, and dark in spite of the early time. There was no branch. Instead, there was just an orange cat. Skinny, with dirty, matted fur and one missing eye.
“Oh
 Uh
 Hello?” she said, fully aware that she was talking to a cat. “You’re that stray that Linda keeps feeding, right? She’s not home today, but- Hey! Where are you going!”
For the cat had let himself in, squeezing past her legs and rubbing against her in a flurry of static that made her shin numb. “You’re not supposed to be inside,” Tali said, reaching down to scoop up the cat, but like a liquid, the cat dodged her grasp, slipping through her arms effortlessly.
“Hey! Hey!” Tali yelped, but the cat was already walking into the kitchen, pausing momentarily to check out the small decorated tree in the foyer. Tali was left holding the door open expectantly. She sighed, looking towards the street. It was awfully cold out
 Her internal sensors were reporting -14 degrees Celsius, not accounting for the windchill. And

“No!” she yelped, watching the cat jump onto the kitchen counter and begin lapping up cereal milk from a leftover bowl. She sighed, closing the door. Surely one night wouldn’t hurt.
She chased after the cat, who jumped off the counter just before she arrived, sauntering into the living room. She hurriedly dumped out the milk, clearing away any other dirty dishes that had been left out, and got some cat food from the cupboard. Hopefully, there weren’t more table scraps in the living room.
When she arrived, she noticed the cat was curled up on the blanket she’d just been under, cleaning himself. Any doubts on his gender were vanquished at the sight. Tali sighed. “That was my blanket, you little-” The commercials ended, and she found herself distracted by the movie again. “Fine,” she grumbled, sitting down beside the cat to watch the movie. But they had barely even introduced the female lead before the cat was up again, wandering the house and poking his head into every little corner. Tali kept one eye on him and one on the movie
 That was until he pushed his way into the basement.
“Oh no, that’s my bedroom!” she said, chasing after the cat. But the cat had four legs, and she didn’t even really have two. By the time she had caught up, the cat was curled up on top of her computer server, eyes closed.
“No, not that’s not a cat bed,” she said, picking up the cat and putting him on the ground. The cat gave her a nasty glare, hopping back up onto the warm computer and laying down. She picked him up again. He hopped back up. “I’m a computer!” Tali growled with frustration. “I don’t get tired of doing the same thing over and over again.”
Unfortunately, the cat seemed just as stubborn. She reached out to grab him yet again, and he hissed, swatting at her hand and pushing himself into a tiny gap between computer cases. Tali jerked her hand back, glaring back at the cat. “You’re going to mess something up!”
Not that he cared. Tali searched the internet for a solution. Surely someone in the history of humanity had dealt with a cat in a dangerous place before. But most of the answers seemed to involve noises, which scared him further into the gap, and water, which was dangerous around electronics.
“Food then,” Tali said. “You didn’t go for the kibble
 Maybe we have some tuna?”
She practically stomped her way into the kitchen. She was missing her movie for this little troll. She hadn’t even gotten the can opener when she saw the orange ears poke through the doorway.
“Aha!” she yelled. Too soon. The cat was back between the hardware before she could close the distance.
“Oh come on, you didn’t care about getting close to me before!” Tali said exasperatedly. Back upstairs for the tuna. Rinse and repeat.
It was late when Kara and the others finally came home to a darkened house. They whispered and shushed each other as they snuck inside, careful not to wake up the AI sleeping on the couch, and the orange cat curled on top of her.

Superman

(by u/MajorParadox)
Jon looked out the window at the sky above the Kent Farm.
“Daddy will be home soon,” said Lois on the couch next to him. “He’s just running a little late.”
“I could use some help in here,” called Ma from the kitchen door. “Santa will need his milk and cookies.”
Jon’s eyes lit up. “Santa likes cookies?” he asked.
“He sure does,” said Lois. “Chocolate chip.”
Jon lifted a finger to his face. “Daddy likes chocolate chip cookies too.”
“He loves them,” said Ma as Jon ran into the kitchen with her. “I always baked extra ones for him when we were putting cookies out for Santa.
Martha placed an empty plate on the kitchen table next to a pan of fresh cookies and tapped the chair closest
“Now what?” asked Jon, climbing up so he could reach. The smell of the cookies right under his nose was hard to ignore. He had to remember they were for Santa, though.
Ma sat in another chair and picked up a cookie from the pan and placed it on the plate. “We just need to stack them here,” she explained. “Easy peasy.”
“Want to help, Mommy?” Jon asked his mom who was watching from the doorway with a smile.
“I think you two have it covered,” Lois answered.
Jon and his grandmother moved the rest of the cookies very carefully. Before Jon could drop the next one, Martha stopped him.
“The rest are for you,” she smiled.
“I thought Daddy always ate the extra ones,” Jon asked.
“Oh,” said Lois. “He’ll be fine.”
Jon took a moment and then chomped down the cookie.
“Now the milk,” said Martha, moving toward the fridge.
Later that night, Jon was lying on the couch, trying to keep his eyes open. They had told him Santa wouldn’t come if he was awake, but he just had to catch a glimpse. If was sneaky, maybe he wouldn’t notice. Plus, something wasn’t quite right. And he was going to find out what.
The door opened and Clark walked inside. “Sorry I’m late,” he said. “Looks like he didn’t make it, I feel terrible. It took me longer in Indonesia than I thought. Luckily everyone’s okay now.”
“It’s fine,” said Lois. “We still have Christmas morning.”
“Ooh, cookies,” said Clark, grabbing a couple from the plate above the mantel. “Mmm, chocolate chip. My favorite.”
Jon peeked his one his eyes open, watching his dad eating the cookies. He knew it. His father wasn’t quite what he seemed. His father was Santa Claus. Maybe he should
 yawn
 maybe

Clark lifted Jon up, carrying him to his bed. “Sorry, I missed you, buddy,” he said. “But don’t worry, Santa made it.”

Wonder Woman

(by u/Predaplant)
An avalanche is a funny thing. All that snow and ice balanced on top of the mountain just perfectly, seemingly steady
 and then, all it takes is a little pressure. A stray snowflake, maybe, or an icy gust of wind. Something that you might feel press against your skin for but a moment, cause you to grit your teeth before it passes by.
And yet, it can cause a major cataclysm. Cause everything that had been building up for years to topple down.
Which was why Tora found herself in Gateway City, of all places, in the middle of winter. It was bizarre; if she had been back home, she would’ve been wrapped in layers upon layers, barely able to face the winter weather despite all her preparation.
There, ice was an enemy. Here, well
 she sat by the ocean as a breeze blew in. Colder than the air surrounding it, for sure, but she barely noticed.
If anything, it was refreshing. It rejuvenated her.
Maybe here, ice could be a friend.
It was why she had come all this way, all these thousands of kilometres, across an ocean and a continent, to a place she had only ever been able to imagine before. Her family had scraped together enough money for a plane ticket because they knew. Tora could be their daughter, their ally, no longer. It was too dangerous.
It had been their fear her whole life, that her grandfather would find her. She didn’t know why, or what that would entail, until recently.
She had seen his face. She had fought him, barely getting her family out alive. She didn’t want to think about it any more than that.
It was fine. She was old enough to move out anyways. California seemed like the best choice. It was warm, basically never snowed. Far away from her home, from her grandfather. She’d be safe there, even if she was alone.
Plus, maybe she’d meet Wonder Woman. It was a little silly, but if she was being honest, that was why she had chosen America. The superheroes.
Not that she thought she could be one herself, but
 they inspired her. She had wanted to be around them. Maybe they could even protect people if her grandfather managed to find her somehow. And so, here she was.
Christmas. In a faraway country, in a place where it didn’t even snow. She pulled a small box out of her bag; a present from her parents, before she had stepped on the airplane. To be opened on Christmas, they had told her.
She opened it now. It was a necklace of a single snowflake, pristine and perfect. Tying it around her neck, she let herself thaw. The warm tears fell onto the ground below.
She would reinvent herself here, and she’d be ready if her grandfather came. That was her promise, to herself and to her family, when she had left.
She only hoped she could fulfill it.
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2022.11.07 17:37 pantsthezombie I watched and reviewed 40 horror films this fall.

My ratings reflect how much I personally enjoyed the films, not necessarily their technical competence; so the home video Fuck the Devil 2: Return of the Fucker scores higher than Bodies Bodies Bodies.
The Nightshifter (Morto NĂŁo Fala) -- Dennison Ramalho, 2018
A mortician possesses the ability to speak with the dead. Interesting concept! Unfortunately, this movie does nothing with it. The thoroughly unlikeable protagonist uses his awesome power to learn that his wife is cheating on him, whereupon he arranges to have her lover killed by gangsters, who end up killing the wife as well. Then she becomes a ghost and spends the rest of the film trying to murder her own children. The kids are the only likable characters in the movie, apart from an inconsequential love interest; too bad they don’t get any character development. To the film’s credit, putting the children in danger was a good choice, since I sure as hell didn’t care if the mortician died. Okay
Psycho Goreman -- Steven Kostanski, 2022
It’s a shame that a movie with this much gore and wacky creature designs is so boring. Even the lead child actor’s thoroughly committed performance can’t save a dull, meandering script filled with juvenile comedy and a bland Power Rangers-esque narrative. It is unlike any movie I’ve ever seen, though, and I do give it points for that. Okay
Repo: The Genetic Opera -- Darren Lynn Bousman, 2008
I appreciate the ambition of this goth rock opera. Unfortunately, for such a concept to work, the music has to be good. That is generally not the case here; outside of a few standouts (“Zydrate Anatomy” and “Night Surgeon” in particular), most of the music is forgettable at best. A large portion of it is awkward expository dialog clumsily set to music, which, to its credit, is often unintentionally funny. The protagonist’s introduction shows him torturing a man to death for no reason, and while I appreciate the spectacle, it precludes any of the sympathy the movie demands for him. I don’t mind that the whole movie has the veneer of a 2000s music video, buried in obnoxious color grading and dim lighting– stylistically, it fits. And there are some good gore gags. Too bad the arias are an afterthought. Okay
Midsommar -- Ari Aster, 2019
Florence Pugh’s performance is heart-wrenching. Ari Aster really has a talent for depicting grief in horror movies. The whole film is beautiful, and disturbing, despite the bright and colorful setting– there are no nighttime scenes here. Midsommar keeps making you think that maybe joining this Swedish cult would be nice
 and then it shows you something horrible. The violence is rare, but when it hits, it hits hard. I’ve seen this three-hour film twice now, and neither time did it feel long. Great
X -- Ti West, 2022
It’s typical for every character in a slasher film to get naked at some point, but here it actually serves the plot (a group of friends making a porno) and the theme (the fleeting beauty of youth). While X takes its time getting violent, the characters are interesting enough that their deaths have some impact, and there are engagingly creepy visuals throughout. Good
Nope -- Jordan Peele, 2022
I really wanted to like this movie. I loved Get Out, and I thought Us was good despite its nonsensical exposition dump, but here I lost interest about an hour in. The stakes are bizarrely low; the characters could simply leave at any time, but they choose not to because they want a really good UFO photo. The alien reveal, while unique, thoroughly disappointed me. On the plus side, Peele sprinkles lots of set-ups and payoffs throughout the script, so I’m sure there are things I didn’t notice on the first watch. And there is a delightfully unsettling alien abduction sequence. Okay
Halloween III: Season of the Witch -- Tommy Lee Wallace, 1982
Some good gore and creepy locations don’t make up for the milquetoast middle-aged white dude protagonist whom all beautiful women inexplicably fall in love with. At least there’s a charismatic villain seemingly pulled from a Bond film, complete with a convoluted evil scheme that includes imprisoning the protagonist and leaving him unguarded. Also, bugs crawl out of people’s mouths. Okay
Halloween (2018) -- David Gordon Green, 2018
Michael Myers’s creepy doctor is a fun character, and it’s interesting to see how the original final girl Laurie Strode’s trauma has been passed down to her family. Laurie has spent the intervening forty years preparing to kill Michael, so it’s a little frustrating when she proves so ineffectual at fighting him. But this is a slasher. There are good kills. Therefore, it is good. Good
Pearl -- Ti West, 2022
This is a prequel to X, but its tone is totally different. While that film is a 70s-style slasher, this recalls classic Hollywood, except with a psycho killer protagonist. The title cards, orchestral score, and midwestern farmhouse setting evoke The Wizard of Oz. Except instead of helping the scarecrow, the girl humps him. And then murders a bunch of people. But Mia Goth’s performance is so good that I sympathize with her dreams of becoming a movie star, and I don’t mind that she spills a long monologue. That’s rare for me. Great
Prey -- Dan Trachtenberg, 2022
In the year 1719, Native Americans battle the Predator. Awesome. It’s an unusual setting for the genre, and it lends itself well to the survival horror of a Predator movie. There are some nice bloody kills, including some satisfying deaths in which the invasive Frenchmen get their comeuppance. The climax felt a bit underwhelming to me, but it’s still cool to see an underestimated character prove her worth in mortal combat. Good
The Sadness (KĆ« Bēi) -- Rob Jabbaz, 2021
Blood everywhere! A zombie movie in the tradition of 28 Days Later, in which an infectious disease turns people into homicidal sadists. There is some timely social commentary for the Covid era (politicians ignore scientists urging a lockdown), but we’re really here for the blood and guts, and that’s mostly what we get. We also get a blood orgy. Good stuff!
The Sadness is not nearly as disturbing as I had read; the violence is so over-the-top that it becomes a little cartoonish, and is mostly inflicted on no-name characters whose only screen time is their gruesome death. And when one of the protagonists loses his fingers, he mostly just shrugs it off, and it doesn’t really bother him for the rest of the film. There are some off-screen rapes that are fairly tasteless, but this is a movie whose main appeal is watching people get ripped apart. It’s all fairly tasteless. Good
The Black Phone -- Scott Derrickson, 2021
I had to pause this movie after a child abuse scene. The performances are so good that I was genuinely upset. As it happens, that is the scariest part; the movie later incorporates supernatural elements that bring the very real horrors of abuse and abduction into the realm of fantasy. It also incorporates some corny and unnecessarily cryptic dialog. And one of the protagonists turns out to be totally useless in the plot, which is disappointing. But overall, it’s an effectively creepy tale that isn’t afraid to take some risks, even if they don’t always pay off. Good
Mandy -- Panos Cosmatos, 2018
I love everything about this movie. The psychedelic visuals, the heavy synth soundtrack, the heavy metal spirit, the pathetic cult leader, the surreal performances, the chainsaws... It is unlike any revenge film I have ever seen. Nicolas Cage’s character is obviously badass, but so is Mandy, in a quiet way– her laughing at the cultist’s pretension is immensely satisfying. So are the spectacular deaths. Great
Final Destination -- James Wong, 2000
I enjoy the elaborate death setups that keep the audience guessing which of the many lethal hazards will ultimately be the fatal ones. Everything between those sequences is uninteresting. Boring characters and corny dialog prevent any sense of suspense; we’re only here to watch them die. And they certainly do! Okay
Final Destination 2 -- David R. Ellis, 2003
Same as the first, but a little faster paced, and with a sense of humor. I generally dislike horror movies that don’t take themselves seriously, but in this case it results in even more outrageous deaths, and that is always good. Of the two Final Destination movies I watched, this was the best. Okay
The House that Jack Built -- Lars von Trier, 2018
A serial killer and the Roman poet Virgil have a philosophical debate on art while the former relates a few of his murders. If you think Lars von Trier movies are pretentious, this won’t change your mind. But the arthouse framing device allows for some fantastical visuals (eventually). And several of the murder sequences are legitimately upsetting. Jack doesn’t just physically harm people; he emotionally abuses them as well, But the film doesn’t glorify him– instead of presenting Jack as a sadistic genius, we see a bumbling, delusional man who only gets away with his crimes because he’s obscenely lucky. Good
The Blob -- Chuck Russell, 1988
This movie vacillates between inoffensive charm and gruesome horror. And by gruesome, I mean people slowly dissolving in acidic goo while having their limbs pulled off. The practical gore effects are fantastic; almost as good as The Thing. I put off this movie for a long time because a sentient blob didn’t sound interesting to me, but gee whiz, it sure kills people in interesting ways. Good
Critters 2: The Main Course -- Mick Garris, 1988
One of my earliest horror movie memories is the scene in which Critters get into a man’s Easter Bunny costume and eat him alive. I did not see any humor in it at the time. Watching it now, it isn’t scary, and it isn’t that funny, but it does have a Barbarella-esque bounty hunter and a giant Critter-ball that instantly devours everyone it rolls over, so while it isn’t as good as Gremlins (which these films so obviously aspire to be), it has its moments. Okay
Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines -- Declan O’Brien, 2012
It’s not enough that these characters die. They must also endure the most agonizing tortures the writer could imagine. It really is a mean-spirited movie; no effort went into any element outside of the scenes of suffering. The conspicuously vacant city soundstage is the dullest scenery in the franchise. The dialog is comically bad, particularly when characters give monologues, although Doug Bradley has fun as the cartoonish villain.
But the deaths. Oh my. They are spectacular and creative and horrible. Wrong Turn 5 made me uncomfortable, so on that level at least it is effective. Okay
House (Hausu) -- Nobuhiko Ôbayashi, 1977
I’ve seen this movie many times, but this was the first time I watched it on the big screen. Not surprisingly, it plays very well to a full house. Wacky special effects, surreal deaths, childlike dialog, unforgettable music, characters named for their singular trait
 House is an experience, and it’s an even better experience in a group. Great
Hellraiser (2022) -- David Bruckner, 2022
Some visually inventive gore and fantastical special effects aren’t enough (certainly not frequent enough) to carry this bloated retread. The characters spend most of the runtime unraveling a mystery whose solution is shown in the first scene. Odessa A’zion gives a good lead performance as a recovering alcoholic, though. Okay
Strangers on a Train -- Alfred Hitchcock, 1951
Robert Walker steals the show as the eccentric psychopath Bruno, who casually ropes a stranger into a murder plot. Pat Hitchcock is hilarious as the outspoken Babs; after she bluntly states how guilty the protagonist must appear to the police, her father says, “One mustn’t always say what one thinks.” I’m not sure we need to see an entire tennis match, or why the protagonist doesn’t throw the match to reach a far more pressing engagement upon which his freedom depends, but overall it’s a captivating thriller with a flashy climax. Good
Bram Stoker’s Dracula -- Francis Ford Coppola, 1992
Keanu’s performance is so embarrassingly bad that I wonder if it was a perplexing artistic choice on Coppola’s part. Conversely, Gary Oldman gives a fabulous performance as the evil, tortured romantic Dracula. It’s honestly cruel to stick Keanu in scenes with him. Visually, the whole movie is spectacular. That’s not quite enough to hold my attention for two hours, particularly when Oldman isn’t on the screen, but I am a sucker for its spectacle nonetheless. Good
Poltergeist -- Tobe Hooper, 1982
I love the setup here. It starts creepy, with the daughter talking to the TV static in the dark. Then the parents flirt in bed until they must comfort their children during a storm. That won my sympathy for the whole family. Which is good, because the horror scenes are often more fantastical than scary, and once the ghost hunters arrive to save the lost daughter, the plot treads water for a bit.
I know Jerry Goldsmith is revered, but I must confess my disdain for that classic Hollywood scoring that blares horns throughout every intense sequence. Louder does not equal scarier. In fact, this movie is best when it’s quiet; the poltergeist silently tormenting the family is far more unsettling than any of the flashy special effects.
But the special effects are a lot of fun, and range from ghostly to ghastly. I had to watch this movie with a light on. Not because it’s scary, but because of the constant strobing lights. There ought to be an epilepsy warning. Good
Birth of the Living Dead -- Rob Kuhns, 2013
A documentary on George Romero’s Night of the Living Dead. There isn’t much here that you can’t learn from the Wikipedia page, but it’s fun to see Romero laugh as he reflects on his movie; he’s quite charming. Unfortunately, there are no actor interviews; Judith O’Dea (Barbara) would have been a welcome addition, or archival footage from the late Duane Jones (Ben). Still, there is some interesting discussion on the film’s racial and political context. Okay
Bodies Bodies Bodies -- Halina Reijn, 2022
Never in my life have I wanted a group of characters to die so badly. They spend the first half hour arguing, until someone dies, at which point they spend ten minutes screaming, before going right back to arguing for the remainder of the film. This is a horror comedy whose only joke is the characters virtue signaling between deaths. Everyone is an insufferable liberal stereotype, which would be okay if their deaths were fun to watch, but most of them occur off-screen. The end is kind of funny, though. Bad
Velvet Buzzsaw -- Dan Gilroy, 2019
I thought the amount of talent in this cast guaranteed a good movie. I was wrong. The script thinks it’s a clever satire on pretension in the world of high art, but really it’s just a dull and convoluted chore. I suppose it’s possible that I missed something, since I was generally too bored to focus on the endless conversations about off-screen characters. There is a single decent death scene involving a great big ball. But overall, Velvet Buzzsaw can’t decide if it wants to be funny or scary, and ends up being neither. Murder Party is a far better horror-satire on artists. Bad
All Hallows’ Eve -- Damien Leone, 2013
This looks and feels like a student film. The characters have no personality, the dialogue is stilted, everything looks cheap
 and yet I like it. It has charm. There’s an alien played by a masked man in a bodysuit, on whom the camera lingers for so long that one begins to develop a certain camaraderie with him. Yet the scene is played totally straight. The only real character in this movie, though, is Art the sadistic clown, and he delivers the gleeful violence I expected, though not quite to the level in the subsequent Terrifier. Damien Leone is an accomplished effects artist, and he plays to his strengths. Good
Daughters of Darkness -- Harry KĂŒmel, 1971
I haven’t seen many European lesbian vampire films from the 70s, but so far, this is the tamest one. For a movie about the infamous blood-bathing Elizabeth Bathory as a blood-sucking vampire, there is an astounding lack of blood. Even the lesbian relationships get less screentime than the less-interesting heterosexual ones. Still, Seyrig’s performance is captivating, the soundtrack is great, and the gothic atmosphere generally keeps things interesting despite the slow pace. Okay
Dead & Buried -- Gary Sherman, 1981
This was my second attempt at watching Dead & Buried. The first time, I turned it off as the townspeople burned a man alive. There is something uncommonly sadistic about this film, particularly for its era; the depiction of terror and pain during the deaths is profoundly unsettling. If it had a single iconic killer like Michael Myers, I’m sure it would be more well-known.
This isn’t just a series of gory kills, though; which is good, because there is a lot of time between them. The acting and writing provide likable characters and a consistently creepy atmosphere, even as the plot gets somewhat ridiculous toward the end. And the eccentric jazz-loving mortician is fabulous. Good
All Jacked Up and Full of Worms -- Alex Phillips, 2022
People eat worms to get high, and a guy has sex with an infant “pleasure doll.” And yet I thought this movie would be weirder. I should have known it couldn’t live up to its title. Most of the runtime is consumed by people saying “Let’s do worms!” and then reveling in semi-psychedelic visuals. For a movie that tries so hard to be transgressive and bizarre, it ends up bizarrely normal, like a student film from someone who thinks his experience is more unique than it is. But the performances are good, and there is some creative imagery despite the somewhat bland cinematography. I have to appreciate its commitment to the odd. Okay
Twilight Zone: The Movie -- John Landis, Steven Spielberg, Joe Dante, George Miller; 1983
You would think a horror anthology with four renowned directors would be better than this. The first two segments are dull and unremarkable. Joe Dante’s segment, though, presents a sort of social nightmare involving a magical and evil little boy, full of fun practical effects and puppetry, and is easily the best of the bunch. The final segment, George Miller’s take on the famous Nightmare at 20,000 Feet episode, features an expressive performance from John Lithgow and a lovely little gremlin costume, but I’ve never been entertained by this sort of “no one believes the protagonist” narrative– once the monster is revealed, it doesn’t really go anywhere. Okay
Spirits of the Dead -- Roger Vadim, Louis Malle, Federico Fellini; 1968
Another anthology, this time based on the works of Edgar Allan Poe
 for the most part. The first segment is painfully slow, but Jane Fonda wears so many extravagant medieval costumes that I have no choice but to enjoy it. It’s like a gothic Barbarella. The second segment starts promising, but eventually devolves into a fifteen-minute card game from which it never recovers. Finally, Fellini’s segment, a self-proclaimed “liberal” adaptation of Never Bet the Devil Your Head, bears no relation whatsoever to the story, apart from the character name “Toby Dammit” and the climax. But it’s by far the best segment here; Terence Stamp is fantastic as a tortured actor, and the lighting and set designs look fabulous. This interpretation of the devil is perhaps the creepiest I’ve seen. I’m embarrassed that this is my first Fellini film, but it will not be the last. Okay
Eaten Alive! -- Umberto Lenzi, 1980
Here we have all the hallmarks of the Italian cannibal genre: racism, rape, and animal cruelty. They’re films about tribal cannibals; of course there’s some racism involved. But I didn’t expect this much rape, including one scene in which a recent widow is forced to have public sex with each of her cousins. There is a level of cruelty here beyond shock value. That extends to the animal deaths, which are frequent, barbaric, and torturously prolonged. Cannibal Holocaust doesn’t come close to this sadism.
To add another layer of bad taste, the plot concerns a Jonestown-esque suicide cult, which is admittedly more interesting than most cannibal film plots. Well, the film is disturbing, so
 good job, I guess. Okay
Yokai Monsters: Spook Warfare (Yƍkai Daisensƍ) -- Yoshiyuki Kuroda, 1968
I play in a metal band. I have seen Iron Maiden live. But I have never experienced anything louder than this screening. I believe it violated OSHA's noise exposure regulations. It was so loud that you could see the soundwaves. Everyone in this movie yells every line they deliver, and since this was filmed before they invented bass frequencies, the whole movie is a piercing treble assault.
Is it good? I don’t know. It’s a kids’ movie with some fun costumes and wacky monsters; the lady with the stretchy neck is cool. It’s about as substantive as a Power Rangers episode. A really loud one. Okay
Nosferatu -- F.W. Murnau, 1922
Nosferatu has aged unevenly. The expository scenes are laughably over-acted, but the vampire scenes are as creepy as any modern horror movie. The live score by the Invincible Czars leans into both, with lighthearted music and occasional dialog shout-outs during the sillier sequences (even inviting the audience to provide a werewolf’s howls at one point), and haunting dissonance for the scary parts. The live score certainly elevates the experience. Good
Fuck the Devil / Fuck the Devil 2: Return of the Fucker -- Michael Pollklesener, 1990 / 1991
Shot-on-video, no-budget home movies that nevertheless feature more creative deaths than most studio slashers. We have acid burning, rib crushing, eye gouging, dummy defenestration, infant decapitation, and more. There’s a charmingly juvenile obsession with gore that’s executed so playfully it’s hard not to smile. The acid victim inexplicably pulls out his own stringy guts just so they’ll show up on camera. Childishly off-rhythm keyboard playing accompanies most scenes, except the Evil Dead-inspired first-person shots, which are accompanied by hilariously prolonged demon sounds punctuated by conspicuous breaths and barely contained laughter.
Yes, the effects are laughable; and no, there is no devil and no fucking. But there is a palpable sense of joy– you can tell they had fun making these plotless pieces of trash. Between this, The Burning Moon, and Nekromantik, it seems that Germany experienced a magical wave of homemade horror in the early 90s which I intend to explore further. Good
Blood Rage -- John Grissmer, 1987
I have finally found it: the greatest 80s slasher. And it doesn’t feature a masked killer. But it does feature a distraught mother, and gives extensive focus to her cleaning, eating, and drinking to cope with the various traumas the film thrusts upon her: a boyfriend dumping her, a son being wrongly imprisoned for a decade, a fiancĂ© being murdered, and another son being a serial killer. She really goes through it. As ridiculous and gory as this movie is, it retains a surprising amount of pathos; Louise Lasser gives a wonderfully committed performance as a mother steadily falling apart.
Most slashers are, perhaps poetically, lifeless and dull between the kills. Rather than present the standard filler scenes with cardboard characters, Blood Rage becomes a black comedy full of bizarre and uncomfortable social interactions. It’s almost as though Todd Solondz made a horror movie. Great
Terrifier 2 -- Damien Leone, 2022
Oh boy. This is as gory as everyone says. It has the longest scene of torturous mutilation I have ever witnessed. The accounts of people fainting and vomiting during screenings are probably just marketing, but if any film could elicit such reactions, this is one. Unlike the first movie, here we are given a chance to empathize with some of the characters before watching their horrifically brutal deaths.
Yet it’s strangely fun– this installment leans much further into the supernatural, which gives the audience a little detachment from its gruesome violence. That somewhat dampens the horror, particularly towards the end, when it becomes laughably fantastical; but I was never bored despite the long runtime
 although it would benefit from a tighter edit.
Also, Terrifier 2 introduces what could become a second iconic villain from this franchise: Art’s evil little sidekick. I’m already excited for the next movie. Good
Tales from the Quadead Zone -- Chester Novell Turner, 1987
A shot-on-video anthology with fewer stories than its title suggests. The acting is bizarre; in one segment, a man murders his sibling at dinner, and the family barely reacts. In another, a character laughs for a full ten minutes while he monologues to his dead brother. But the biggest star here is the funky keyboard score that obscures almost all of the dialogue it plays over. Unfortunately, beyond the general weirdness, there isn’t much going on; Tales from the Quadead Zone lacks the redeeming gore of Fuck the Devil to rise above its sluggish home video pacing. Okay
The Cornshukker -- Brando Snider, 1997
If Jim Jarmusch and David Lynch’s teenage son made a movie, but received no financial assistance from his famous parents, it would probably be something like this. The Cornshukker is bizarre, funny, and artful despite the low budget and cast of non-actors. There are a couple surprisingly committed performances, particularly the impassioned priest who monologues in a silo. The Cornshukker himself eats nothing but corn, says nothing but “I know,” and does little but twitch as people talk at him, but is nevertheless an endearing character, apparently played by the director’s brother since the original actor refused to shave his head. Of course there’s not much of a plot, and the pacing is generally slow, but the playful weirdness generally keeps it interesting. Good
Nekromantik 2 -- Jörg Buttgereit, 1991
This isn’t as good as the first Nekromantik
 but then, so few films are. Yet it’s still a wonderful piece of independent art cinema. With a subject as lurid as necrophilia, this is a surprisingly quiet film. It almost feels like we’re living with the characters in real time, experiencing both the mundane and the thrilling with them. This is best illustrated by the scene in which our necrophiliac heroine cuts up her beloved corpse partner
 slowly and with great difficulty. Nekromantik 2 goes beyond the shock value of such a gruesome act; it is also an emotional one: immediately beforehand, we see her quietly crying and drinking whisky as she prepares to discard her dead lover for a living one.
Nekromantix 2 is quite slow; a few cuts would help. But it retains the charm of the original, and the keyboard score– this time co-written by lead actor Monika M, who also performs a musical interlude halfway through. She’s not a singer, but she is absolutely committed to this film. Good

In review:
Only films I had never seen before are eligible for inclusion here. Otherwise, Mandy, Midsommar, and Hausu would crowd the “favorites” section.
Favorites: Pearl, Blood Rage
Goriest: Terrifier 2, The Sadness, Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines
Most Disappointing: Bodies Bodies Bodies, All Jacked Up and Full of Worms
Weirdest: Tales from the Quadead Zone, The Cornshukker, Psycho Goreman
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2022.10.30 06:47 Gweeky Booty in “Barbarella” costume

Booty in “Barbarella” costume submitted by Gweeky to StassieBaby [link] [comments]


2022.08.09 05:40 ktscarlett94 What kind of plastic to create armor for my Barbarella costume?

What kind of plastic to create armor for my Barbarella costume?
This is the specific outfit. I’m not a cosplay expert so something suitable for a crafty beginner would be great. Not sure what key words to search for on Amazon. Any help would be appreciated!
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2022.03.04 20:30 JuanRiveara Reddit Chosen Oscars: 1968 Winners

Best Picture
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
3. Rosemary’s Baby
4. The Lion in Winter
4. The Producers
6. Planet of the Apes
7. Funny Girl
7. Night of the Living Dead
9. if...
9. Yellow Submarine
Best Director
  1. Stanley Kubrick for 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Sergio Leone for Once Upon a Time in the West
  3. George A. Romero for Night of the Living Dead
  4. Anthony Harvey for The Lion in Winter
  5. Roman Polanski for Rosemary’s Baby
Best Lead Actor
  1. Peter O'Toole as King Henry II in The Lion in Winter
  2. Gene Wilder as Leo Bloom in The Producers
  3. Malcolm McDowell as Mick Travis in if....
  4. Ron Moody as Fagin in Oliver!
  5. Zero Mostel as Max Bialystock in The Producers
  6. Jack Lemmon as Felix Ungar in The Odd Couple
Best Lead Actress
1. Mia Farrow as Rosemary Woodhouse in Rosemary’s Baby
1. Barbra Streisand as Fanny Brice in Funny Girl
3. Katharine Hepburn as Eleanor of Aquitaine in The Lion in Winter
4. Liv Ullmann as Eva Rosenberg in Shame
5. Joanne Woodward as Rachel Cameron in Rachel, Rachel
Best Supporting Actor
  1. Henry Fonda as Frank in Once Upon a Time in the West
  2. John Cassavetes as Guy Woodhouse in Rosemary’s Baby
  3. Anthony Hopkins as Richard the Lionheart in The Lion in Winter
  4. Douglas Rain as HAL 9000 in 2001: A Space Odyssey
  5. Martin Sheen as Timmy Cleary in The Subject Was Roses
Best Supporting Actress
  1. Ruth Gordon as Minnie Castevet in Rosemary’s Baby
  2. Shani Wallis as Nancy in Oliver!
  3. Lynn Carlin as Maria Forst in Faces
  4. Kim Hunter as Dr. Zira in Planet of the Apes
  5. Kay Medford as Rose Brice in Funny Girl
Best Original Screenplay
  1. The Producers
  2. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  3. Once Upon a Time in the West
  4. Faces
  5. Shame
Best Adapted Screenplay
  1. Rosemary’s Baby
  2. The Lion in Winter
  3. Planet of the Apes
  4. The Odd Couple
  5. Funny Girl
  6. The Subject Was Roses
Best Non-English Language Film
  1. War and Peace
  2. Shame
  3. Hour of the Wolf
  4. The Fireman’s Ball
  5. Stolen Kisses
Best Documentary Film
1. Black Panthers
2. High School
2. Monterey Pop
4. Symbiopsychotaxplasm: Take One
5. The Queen
Best Original Score
  1. Once Upon a Time in the West
  2. Planet of the Apes
  3. The Lion in Winter
  4. Rosemary’s Baby
  5. The Thomas Crown Affair
Best Original Song
  1. "Springtime for Hitler" from The Producers
  2. "The Windmills of Your Mind" from The Thomas Crown Affair
  3. "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
  4. "Funny Girl" from Funny Girl
  5. "The Wonderful Thing About Tiggers" from Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day
Best Sound
  1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Bullitt
  3. Once Upon a Time in the West
  4. Funny Girl
  5. Planet of the Apes
Best Production Design
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. The Lion in Winter
2. Planet of the Apes
4. Oliver!
5. Once Upon a Time in the West
Best Cinematography
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
3. Romeo and Juliet
3. Rosemary’s Baby
5. Shame
Best Makeup and Hairstyling
  1. Planet of the Apes
  2. Night of the Living Dead
  3. The Lion in Winter
  4. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  5. Oliver!
Best Costume Design
1. The Lion in Winter
2. Planet of the Apes
2. Romeo and Juliet
4. Funny Girl
5. 2001: A Space Odyssey
Best Editing
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. Bullitt
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
4. Rosemary’s Baby
5. Planet of the Apes
Best Special Effects
  1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Planet of the Apes
  3. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
  4. Barbarella
  5. Bullitt
Best Directorial Debut
  1. Mel Brooks for The Producers
  2. George A. Romero for Night of the Living Dead
  3. Paul Newman for Rachel, Rachel
  4. Martin Scorsese for Who’s That Knocking at My Door
  5. Bob Rafelson for Head
Best Ensemble Cast
1. The Lion in Winter
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
3. The Producers
3. Rosemary’s Baby
5. Oliver!
Best Choreography, Stunts or Dance
  1. Oliver!
  2. Funny Girl
  3. Bullitt
  4. Once Upon a Time in the West
  5. Planet of the Apes
Best Soundtrack
  1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Yellow Submarine
  3. Oliver!
  4. Funny Girl
  5. Head
Best Non-English Language Performance
  1. Liv Ullmann as Eva Rosenberg in Shame
  2. Max von Sydow as Jan Rosenberg in Shame
  3. Jean-Pierre LĂ©aud as Antoine Doinel in Stolen Kisses
  4. Liv Ullmann as Alma Borg in Hour of the Wolf
  5. Max von Sydow as Johan Borg in Hour of the Wolf
Full charts for all the categories
submitted by JuanRiveara to Oscars [link] [comments]


2022.03.04 20:30 JuanRiveara Reddit Chosen Oscars: 1968 Winners

Best Picture
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
3. Rosemary’s Baby
4. The Lion in Winter
4. The Producers
6. Planet of the Apes
7. Funny Girl
7. Night of the Living Dead
9. if...
9. Yellow Submarine
Best Director
  1. Stanley Kubrick for 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Sergio Leone for Once Upon a Time in the West
  3. George A. Romero for Night of the Living Dead
  4. Anthony Harvey for The Lion in Winter
  5. Roman Polanski for Rosemary’s Baby
Best Lead Actor
  1. Peter O'Toole as King Henry II in The Lion in Winter
  2. Gene Wilder as Leo Bloom in The Producers
  3. Malcolm McDowell as Mick Travis in if....
  4. Ron Moody as Fagin in Oliver!
  5. Zero Mostel as Max Bialystock in The Producers
  6. Jack Lemmon as Felix Ungar in The Odd Couple
Best Lead Actress
1. Mia Farrow as Rosemary Woodhouse in Rosemary’s Baby
1. Barbra Streisand as Fanny Brice in Funny Girl
3. Katharine Hepburn as Eleanor of Aquitaine in The Lion in Winter
4. Liv Ullmann as Eva Rosenberg in Shame
5. Joanne Woodward as Rachel Cameron in Rachel, Rachel
Best Supporting Actor
  1. Henry Fonda as Frank in Once Upon a Time in the West
  2. John Cassavetes as Guy Woodhouse in Rosemary’s Baby
  3. Anthony Hopkins as Richard the Lionheart in The Lion in Winter
  4. Douglas Rain as HAL 9000 in 2001: A Space Odyssey
  5. Martin Sheen as Timmy Cleary in The Subject Was Roses
Best Supporting Actress
  1. Ruth Gordon as Minnie Castevet in Rosemary’s Baby
  2. Shani Wallis as Nancy in Oliver!
  3. Lynn Carlin as Maria Forst in Faces
  4. Kim Hunter as Dr. Zira in Planet of the Apes
  5. Kay Medford as Rose Brice in Funny Girl
Best Original Screenplay
  1. The Producers
  2. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  3. Once Upon a Time in the West
  4. Faces
  5. Shame
Best Adapted Screenplay
  1. Rosemary’s Baby
  2. The Lion in Winter
  3. Planet of the Apes
  4. The Odd Couple
  5. Funny Girl
  6. The Subject Was Roses
Best Non-English Language Film
  1. War and Peace
  2. Shame
  3. Hour of the Wolf
  4. The Fireman’s Ball
  5. Stolen Kisses
Best Documentary Film
1. Black Panthers
2. High School
2. Monterey Pop
4. Symbiopsychotaxplasm: Take One
5. The Queen
Best Original Score
  1. Once Upon a Time in the West
  2. Planet of the Apes
  3. The Lion in Winter
  4. Rosemary’s Baby
  5. The Thomas Crown Affair
Best Original Song
  1. "Springtime for Hitler" from The Producers
  2. "The Windmills of Your Mind" from The Thomas Crown Affair
  3. "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
  4. "Funny Girl" from Funny Girl
  5. "The Wonderful Thing About Tiggers" from Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day
Best Sound
  1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Bullitt
  3. Once Upon a Time in the West
  4. Funny Girl
  5. Planet of the Apes
Best Production Design
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. The Lion in Winter
2. Planet of the Apes
4. Oliver!
5. Once Upon a Time in the West
Best Cinematography
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
3. Romeo and Juliet
3. Rosemary’s Baby
5. Shame
Best Makeup and Hairstyling
  1. Planet of the Apes
  2. Night of the Living Dead
  3. The Lion in Winter
  4. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  5. Oliver!
Best Costume Design
1. The Lion in Winter
2. Planet of the Apes
2. Romeo and Juliet
4. Funny Girl
5. 2001: A Space Odyssey
Best Editing
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
2. Bullitt
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
4. Rosemary’s Baby
5. Planet of the Apes
Best Special Effects
  1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Planet of the Apes
  3. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
  4. Barbarella
  5. Bullitt
Best Directorial Debut
  1. Mel Brooks for The Producers
  2. George A. Romero for Night of the Living Dead
  3. Paul Newman for Rachel, Rachel
  4. Martin Scorsese for Who’s That Knocking at My Door
  5. Bob Rafelson for Head
Best Ensemble Cast
1. The Lion in Winter
2. Once Upon a Time in the West
3. The Producers
3. Rosemary’s Baby
5. Oliver!
Best Choreography, Stunts or Dance
  1. Oliver!
  2. Funny Girl
  3. Bullitt
  4. Once Upon a Time in the West
  5. Planet of the Apes
Best Soundtrack
  1. 2001: A Space Odyssey
  2. Yellow Submarine
  3. Oliver!
  4. Funny Girl
  5. Head
Best Non-English Language Performance
  1. Liv Ullmann as Eva Rosenberg in Shame
  2. Max von Sydow as Jan Rosenberg in Shame
  3. Jean-Pierre LĂ©aud as Antoine Doinel in Stolen Kisses
  4. Liv Ullmann as Alma Borg in Hour of the Wolf
  5. Max von Sydow as Johan Borg in Hour of the Wolf
Full charts for all the categories
submitted by JuanRiveara to oscarrace [link] [comments]


2021.12.30 06:11 Serious_Butterscotch Porcelain's Drag Race S1E2 Girl Talk: The Musical

Porcelain's Drag Race S1E2 Girl Talk: The Musical
Porcelain (Voiceover): Previously on Porcelain’s Drag Race
 Teo Rore
 condragulations you are the winner of this week's challenge. Butter Nugget
 Oliver Face
 I’m sorry my dears but you are up for elimination. Butter Nugget, shantay you stay. That mean’s Oliver Face, sashay away.
[Cue dramatic music. The camera pans across the messy workroom. The contestants' belongings are scattered about. Dom’s bigfoot costume stares at the camera. Footsteps can be heard, and the contestants enter the workroom. They gather around the table next to them and look at the mirror.]
Dom Marlboro Riddle: What did she leave us
 [Squints.]
Dee Pression: [Reading the mirror message.] “Y’all could never be as cunt as me! - xoxo Oliver Face.”
[Butter gets up and starts cleaning the mirror. Cuts to Butter’s talking head]
Butter Nugget: I’m so sad
 [sobs] Not only did I have to lip sync but I also had to send home one of my sisters in the process

[Cuts back to the contestants in the workroom, now sitting in the workroom’s lounge. Dom and Teo sit with Butter and comfort her. NV rolls her eyes at Butter.]
Zodya Killer: Congratulations Teo! You earned your win! Those looks were killer.
[The contestants clap for Teo.]
Teo Rore: Thank you so much, it was amazing to be able to go out there and show myself to the judges like that. I think we all did a great job. [Camera cuts to Butter and cuts back.] How’re you feeling Butter?
Butter Nugget: I feel a little shaken y’know? It’s hard to be up there by yourself and having to lip sync

Dee Pression: You did really good Butter! You ate up that lip sync and everyone at home is going to be proud of you!
[By using her therapy skill, Dee has made Butter Nugget feel rejuvenated. Dee gains 5 EXP! Wait what?! This isn’t an RPG!]
NV Lullaby: [Confessional.] Do I agree with Butter staying over Oliver? No. Am I gonna ruin that old bitch’s day though? No.
Henny: [Voice modulator activates.] I can’t wait to get out of this and let my feathers out.
Blu Haze: Me too bitch.
[The contestants get up and head to their workroom stations and begin to de-drag. NV walks Butter over to her station, “Lemme help you grandma.” she says. Teo helps Dom take off their metal claws from their costume. Blu is organizing her Russian doll costume, and lines them up in a row across the back of her station. IIV and Henny are dancing while Homophone blares music. Twi X begins to take off their mask but once they notice the camera they punch it, sending us to our transition!]
đŸŽ¶ Porcelain’s Drag Race đŸŽ¶
đŸŽ¶ Start your engines! đŸŽ¶
đŸŽ¶ Porcelain’s Drag Race đŸŽ¶
đŸŽ¶ Maybe the best artist win! đŸŽ¶
Porcelain: The winner of Porcelain’s Drag Race will receive a lifetime supply of Porcelain Cosmetics, a fierce crown and scepter from Fierce Flag Jewels, and a spread in Porcelain Magazine!
đŸŽ¶ Porcelain’s Drag Race đŸŽ¶
đŸŽ¶ Maybe the best artist - best artist - win! đŸŽ¶
[The contestants all enter the workroom cheerfully.]
Butter Nugget: [Confessional.] It’s a brand new day in the workroom and I am ready to prove myself to these bitches. It’s time for this nugget to shine!
[They gather around a workroom table, in the center of the table is a doll, holding an envelope for the contestants. Henny grabs it with her claws and opens it with her beak.]
Henny: [Voice modulator activates, this time with Porcelain’s voice.] Contestants, I hope this letter finds you all well. Last week, you all strutted your stuff down the runway, representing who you are. This week we’re forgetting all of that, and putting on the performance of a lifetime!
Twi X: Ooh. An acting challenge maybe?
IIV: I love acting! Watch! [Starts mimicking Porcelain.]
[Porcelain’s door opens and she walks out.]
Porcelain: Hello, hello, hello dolls! I see we’re all having fun. [Glares at IIV.]
IIV: [Confessional.] Fuck. [Laughs.]
[The contestants gather around. Chastity and Dead Girl also walk out behind Porcelain.]
Porcelain: Now contestants, now that we all know each other I think it’s time for a fun little game. For this week’s mini-challenge, each of you will be getting into quick drag, then you will go into small groups, and throw a tea party for each of us.
Dee Pression: Ooh, we love a tea party. Don’t we gals? [Looks at camera. The camera pans away.]
Porcelain: Now group number one, my group, will be Blu Haze, Butter Nugget, and Dee Pression. Group number two, Chastity’s group, will be Dom Marlboro Riddle, Henny, Homophone, and IIV. Last, but not least, is group number three, Dead Girl’s group which has NV Lullaby, Teo Rore, Twi X and Zodya Killer. Ready? Set. Go!
[The contestants run to their workstations and start getting ready. The judges decorate their tables. After fifteen minutes the contestants go to their appropriate tables. First is group number one. They meet at Porcelain’s table and are greeted by desserts shaped like dolls.]
Porcelain: You all look so lovely! Would you like some tea? [Porcelain stretches out her arm and pours tea into the contestants cups.] Now just between us ladies, how are you all feeling about the performances of your fellow contestants?
Dee Pression: Well, I think that I have some fierce competition with Teo Rore.
Blu Haze: [Nods head.] I think that Teo and Zodya are bringing, I’m surprised that Zodya wasn’t in the top.
Porcelain: Oh really? Do you think that is anyone that should’ve been in the bottom?
Butter Nugget: I would have to say Dom. I didn’t think their looks were up to snuff.
Porcelain: Interesting
 [Sips tea.]
[Over at Chastity’s table there is an assortment of desserts shaped as demons and angels in cages. Tea is brewing.]
Chastity: How are you all feeling about last week?
Dom Marlboro Riddle: I’m so happy with how I did, but at the same time I was giving winner as fuck so I’m a little confused. [Dom_Marlboro_Riddle_Laugh.mp4]
IIV: Feeling like shit. [Crickets.]
Chastity: What about you Homophone?
Homophone: [Homophone starts playing sad music. They signal at the gramophone, revealing part of it is damaged. They can’t speak anymore.]
Chastity: Aw, you poor thing. I’m going to have Porcelain make a request for some spare parts. [Whistles and whispers.] Hopefully before the next challenge too.
[The camera cuts to Dead Girl’s table. This table is designed as though it’s a graveyard.]
Dead Girl: Hey besties, before we start I wanna congratulate Teo on his win.
[The group claps.]
Dead Girl: Now, I have a question for you all. What were your thoughts on the last episode?
NV Lullaby: Well I should’ve won and the old bitch should’ve gone home :eye_roll:
Dead Girl: Well according to the fans, they think that Zodya should’ve been in the top. How do you feel about that Zodya?
Zodya Killer: Wait - ohmygod - really? That’s so cool! I’ve always wanted to be popular.
Twi X: [Confessional] I’m honestly surprised that Zodya won the fan poll, I mean have you seen her looks? They’re nothing special.
[The contestants continue their tea party, chatting, and having fun. Porcelain, Chastity, and Dead Girl have them play silly games. Eventually, the three gather together and briefly chat. They call the contestants over and make their announcement.]
Porcelain: Alright contestants, the fun and games are over. It’s time to announce the winner of this week’s mini challenge. The most entertaining and charismatic host was
 Henny! Congratulations, you are the winner of this week’s mini challenge, and as a result you will be given a special opportunity in this week’s main challenge. For this week’s main challenge you all will be debuting in our first ever musical - Girl Talk - a musical inspired by Cass Elliot and Lulu’s song of the same name. The musical will stray away from the light topics and instead delve into the lives of women living in the 60s who are tormented by a mysterious killer. Henny, as the winner of this week’s challenge you will be given the role of casting director.
[Chastity and Dead Girl give out the casting sheets.]
Porcelain: Good luck, and I’ll see you all on the main stage.
[The contestants all gather around the big workroom table again and Henny starts assigning roles. It goes smoothly until
]
Henny: Okay, let’s see
 the role of Linda is going to go to
 Butter Nugget. Zodya, I think you should be the mysterious killer!
Zodya Killer: I agree!
Twi X: I don’t.
Zodya Killer: Excuse you?
Twi X: I think I should get the role of the mysterious killer, I’m more qualified than the Zodiac Killer wannabe.
[The fight between Twi X and Zodya Killer rages on for a few minutes until Henny interjects.]
Henny: Okay, how about this. I give each of you a segment of the mysterious killer’s script and then we decide by vote.
Twi X: Fine.
Zodya Killer: Fine.
[Twi X goes first. They deliver a very intense monologue, their body language is on point for the seriousness of the role. Zodya goes next, they deliver a shorter segment of the script, but then deliver a brief but outstanding performance with the mysterious killer's solo number. The group votes.]
Henny: Okay the votes are in
 5-6
 Zodya Killer wins the role!
[Zodya is delighted while Twi X looks like they want to commit homicide. An hour or two later the contestants head to the mainstage where they record their vocals. It goes smoothly for everyone except for Butter, Dom, and NV. Homophone is last in the line up, everyone except Henny has left the main stage. Homophone keeps trying to record their vocals but no matter how hard they try nothing is coming out.]
Henny: You okay Homophone? Did Porcelain ever get you that piece you needed?
[Homophone nods their head side to side.]
Henny: I see
 hm
 well you know I know a thing or two about vocal pieces, let me see what I can do.
[Henny flies up and lands on Homophone’s head. She opens his gramophone head up and starts conducting surgery on him.]
Henny: A few loose bits here and there, and a fried voice modulator. Let’s see if I have a spare
 [Henny digs through their bag, finding a voice modulator labelled “1920’s New Yorker”.] Who would’ve thought this would come in handy.
[Henny finishes installing a new voice modulator in Homophone’s gramophone.]
Henny: You should be good now
 c’mon give it a try.
Homophone: [Coughs. Spare metallic pieces fly out of their mouth (The gramophone’s hole).] Mhm. [Deep breath.] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Henny: It worked!
[Homophone records their lines and then they head back to the workroom with their new friend - Henny. As they enter they see Dee and IIV planning the choreography for the musical. The two of them work together and create choreography that is challenging but at the same time easy enough for everyone to understand.]
Dee Pression: So how are we all feeling about the choreo?
Teo Rore: I think that it’s great so far. No one seems to be lagging behind.
IIV: Mhm. This is gonna be the best musical that the audience has ever seen.
Blu Haze: [Confessional] Everyone around me is feeling super amped about the musical, but I am shaking like a chihuahua. I’ve been struggling a lot with the choreography, it’s been making me so nervous. It’s to the point where my vocals are shaky, and the last thing I wanna do is fuck this up on last television.
[Camera cuts back to the contestants, in particular Blu Haze, Dee Pression, and IIV.]
IIV: Now Dee
 [Applies eyeliner.] You’ve been on a couple of these shows before
 [Fixes eyeliner.] Do you ever feel a pressure to succeed?
Dee Pression: I do! Especially on challenges like this, where y’know my entire career is on the line. Back in Toronto I’m known as the like dancing diva.
IIV: I know exactly how you feel. Being a judge on House of Flags and a contestant on Free Mas Draga before I feel so much pressure to make my fans happy. What about you Blu?
Blu Haze: I know exactly how you guys feel. Back home, I’ve always been like, the star. I’m Brunali’s daughter for a reason. So to come here and not be praised immediately, and then to have to be in a musical, which I struggle a lot with, just makes me feel like shit. [Sob.]
Dee Pression: Listen sister, you’re gonna do an amazing job tonight.
IIV: Mhm. I know you are. If you’re Brunali’s drag daughter I know you will.
LIGHTS
 CAMERA
 ACTION!
[A silhouette of Porcelain can be seen. She turns revealing herself to the camera and struts down the runway.]

https://preview.redd.it/z5do1akn4m881.png?width=1919&format=png&auto=webp&s=b671d5e4879a611fde5cebdd140d6a2f0210684b
Porcelain: Welcome to the main stage of Porcelain’s Drag Race. This week, we have challenged our contestants with putting on Porcelain’s Drag Race’s first ever musical - Girl Talk. Tonight I am once again joined by my lovely family, Chastity and Dead Girl. How’re you doing Chastity?
Chastity: I am doing fantastic mother, and I’m so excited to see what the contestants are ready to bring to the stage.
Porcelain: What about you Dead Girl?
Dead Girl: Porcelain, I have been waiting for this moment since I was dug up from the ground. [Laughs.]
Porcelain: Racers start your engines, and let’s go!
[Suburban Boston. 1962. The main stage is blackened out. A giant apartment complex is on top of it. A grand opening number starts with everyone except Zodya on stage, dancing and singing. Everyone is doing well, for the most part that is. NV Lullaby’s dancing catches the judges eyes. It’s beautiful, but it gets in the way of her singing. She loses her breath in between some of her lines in the song. She recovers gracefully by the end of the number.
The next scene starts with Henny and Teo Rore. Henny plays the dutiful wife character, while Teo plays her husband. It’s early in the morning, the two are having breakfast until breaking news comes over the radio. A murder victim has been found not too far away from the apartment complex. Teo tells Henny to not worry, that she’ll be safe, as he heads off for work. His acting is decent. Once he leaves Henny breaks out into an emotional song about her life as a housewife in the apartment complex. Her singing is beautiful, and while her dancing is minimal she does a great job.
After Henny’s song she walks outside of the apartment complex, to the park outside where she sees the ensemble played by IIV, NV Lullaby, and Twi X. They’re gathered around a hot dog stand where Homophone works. Henny chats with Homophone, their acting is on point. (Note: It seems as though Henny may have changed the voice modulators settings to give Homophone and themselves Boston accents from the 60’s.) The two of them walk past a fountain, where they see Detective Linda McCollough, played by Butter Nugget, running past to investigate a new crime scene. Henny tells Homophobe about her fear of being killed, which leads them to break out into another number about the dangers of the city side of the suburbs. The ensemble joins in. IIV and Twi X keep up flawlessly with one another, they’re in sync vocally while NV struggles once again. Butter Nugget comes back and breaks the number up, telling them their gossip is nothing but girl talk and that they need to move on with their lives. Her acting is very camp, but her singing is rough. They all head home for the night.
The scene changes. Now behind the apartment building, where Butter, and two police women played by Blu and Dom are tailing the mysterious killer. The killer is preying on their next victim - played by Dee Pression. Dee plays the role of the victim perfectly, they’re innocent, and their acting is great. Another number starts with Henny and Teo arguing over the safety of their apartment. This is then juxtaposed with Dee, singing her head off in an alleyway near the apartment. Blu and Dom join in. To everyone’s shock Blu demolishes her choreography and her vocals, all of her fear gone. Dom on the other hand messes up here and there. The number ends with Dee screaming after meeting her demise at the hands of the killer.
A few songs and scenes later it’s the finale. Henny has now been attacked by the killer, thankfully she isn’t harmed. Zodya breaks out into a fantastic solo - they steal the show. Their dancing and body language is on point for the part. Blu and Dom enter the apartment complex and run into Henny’s apartment. Blu delivers an almost perfect performance in comparison to Zodya’s. Dom seems a bit drained. Blu and Dom arrest Zodya’s character with help from Butter. Teo runs into the room to see Henny and the two of them have a touching ballad about finally coming together as a couple, and leaving the suburbs.]
[Camera cuts to runway.]
Porcelain: Category is
 Sensational 60’s!
First up
 Blu Haze!
[Blu walks down the runway in a beautiful dress and headpiece inspired by Carmen Miranda. Her gown is gold, with beautiful beads encrusted on it. She’s wearing chunky pink and brown jewelry that matches with the dress. A slit comes up all the way on the left side of the dress, revealing a gold, jewel encrusted heel. The colors of her head piece are the same as her outfit and accessories, with a striking pink plume in the center.
CF: For my runway I wanted to bring an older piece of Brazilian culture and give it a sixties twist. Carmen Miranda never made it to the sixties, but my runway is her if she did.]
Next up
 Butter Nugget!
[Butter Nugget walks down the runway in a simple, but elegant 1860s southern belle look. Her outfit is a soft sherbert color, and there are lace details on her neck and arms. Her hair is formed in an elegant and classic style.
CF: For my runway I’m subverting expectations, everyone is coming out in 1960’s looks and I’m the only one of these bitches in a different era.]
Next up
 Dee Pression!
[Dee Pression walks down the runway in a cute little pastel baby doll dress. She has curly blonde hair on, and a pastel bonnet, with tiny lacy gloves, white socks, and heeled Mary Janes. Half way through the runway she does a reveal, ripping off the bonnet and babydoll dress to reveal another bonnet and babydoll dress in another color.
CF: My look tonight is inspired by the iconic babydoll dresses of the 1960s. I’m giving you Twiggy from head to toe.]
Next up
 Dom Marlboro Riddle!
[Dom Marlboro Riddle walks down the runway in an alien meets Barbarella inspired look. Her hair is stacked super high, their skin is sticky and green, and his lasers are set to stun! She walks down the runway gun in hand, holstering it when needed to show the judges her sticky skin.]
Next up
 Henny!
[Henny makes her way down the runway in a Huia bird inspired look, wearing a dark black gown with white trim and orange accents.
CF: (Voice Modulator Set To: 60s Kiwi Accent) My runway look is inspired by the lost beauty of New Zealand in the 1960s and that is the Huia bird. These birds are now extinct, and the last time they were seen was in the early to mid 60s. Rumor has it Linda Crunch is working on bringing them back to life.]
Next up
 Homophone!
[Homophone walks down the runway in a beautiful back dress dress, and pearls inspired by Lesley Gore. As they walk down the runway “You Don’t Own Me” by Lesley Gore plays.]
Next up
 IIV!
[IIV walks down the runway inspired by the iconic girl group The Supremes. Her hair is in a beautiful black up-do, her dress is Bob Mackie, orange with ostrich feathers at the bottom, and silver detailing all around.
CF: For my runway I am giving you a look inspired by the iconic Diana Ross in The Supremes. I’m wearing an actual Bob Mackie gown, and I feel beautiful!]
Next up
 NV Lullaby!
[NV Lullaby walks down the runway in a look inspired by the iconic Twiggly. Her dress is blue, with red accents. Her tights are a lighter shade of blue, and her shoes are a darker shade with bows on them. Her hair is slicked towards the side with colorful and fun geometric shapes.]
Next up
 Teo Rore!
[Muñecos Infernales. Inspired by the 1961 film “Muñecos Infernales” Teo Rore walks down the runway in a horrid outfit. Their face is destroyed, replaced with a dark and grimy mask. Their hair is unkempt, with dry blood and dirt scattered around.]
Next up
 Twi X!
[Twi X walks down the runway in a 1960s hands free telephone mask, the rest of their outfit is a black tulle gown, except for a few blood stains here and there. Suddenly, a phone rings on the judges table. Porcelain picks it up, “Hello?” she says, “Hello Porcelain” Twi X says, mimicking the killers in Scream. Twi whips out a knife and then throws it, almost hitting Porcelain.]
Lastly, Zodya Killer!
[Zodya Killer walks down the runway in a dragged up version of the Zodiac Killer’s outfit. Instead of a shirt and pants it’s a gown, with the iconic Zodiac Killer symbol on it. The bottom of the dress is tattered and stained with mud and blood.]
Porcelain: Hello, contestants. Thank you all for those wonderful musical performances, and for that stunning runway. If I call your name, please step forward. Henny, Homophone, IIV, Teo Rore, and Twi X. You are all safe. You may all proceed backstage and untuck. That means Blu Haze, Butter Nugget, Dee Pression, Dom Marlboro Riddle, NV Lullaby, and Zodya Killer. You all are the tops and bottoms of the week. Let’s start first with Blu Haze.
Blu tonight you really proved to us that you are Brunali’s drag daughter. Your performance in the musical was top notch, I was engaged, and I really enjoyed every second of it.
Chastity: I have to agree, and tonight on the runway I think you look absolutely stunning in this Carmen Miranda fantasy. I loved seeing your reimagining of her. This was a stellar night for you.
Blu Haze: Thank you so much judges, this was such a difficult week for me so to know I did well is such a blessing.
Porcelain: Thank you Blu. Next up, Butter Nugget.
Dead Girl: Hey Butter, tonight in the musical you did pretty well in terms of your acting capabilities. The main issue that I had was with your vocals and your stage presence. Your vocals were super shaky, and your stage presence was non-existent. I’m not sure if it’s your nerves or what, but you seemed to be holding yourself back.
Porcelain: I have to agree. Especially after seeing you come alive during last week’s lip sync, I’m not sure what happened tonight. Next up, Dee Pression. Dee tonight you really showed us why you were picked to be in this competition. Your choreography was beautiful, it was effortless, and it was fun. Your runway is very cute, I want more than cute, but it’s good nonetheless.
Chastity: I think the only thing holding you back tonight Dee is that NV came down in essentially a better version of what you are wearing. I know you both took inspiration from Twiggy, and I think if you two worked together and helped each other out, you’d be unstoppable.
Porcelain: Next up, Dom Marlboro Riddle.
Dead Girl: Hey Dom. So tonight I have to say I am obsessed with your runway. I love sci-fi shit and you have fulfilled that to a t. However, in the musical you seemed super burnt out. Towards the end I noticed you were a little uncomfortable, you were out of breath, you looked tired. I can’t blame you for feeling that way, musicals are exhausting, but you can’t let it show to the audience.
Porcelain: Next up NV Lullaby. Tonight NV, you look really beautiful. I can tell that you are going to be the fashion queen of the season. You know how to model and walk down the runway like it’s what you were born to do. In the musical however you seemed to be focusing too much on your dancing. I’ve been in your position before, I danced a bit too hard when I was competing on Free Mas Draga. The one thing I will tell you is to not take it so seriously, and have fun. Moving on to our last contestant of the night, Zodya Killer.
Chastity: Zodya, tonight you blew me out of the water. This look is so creative, so inventive, so smart. Your performance in the musical was show stopping and you really managed to steal the show from everyone else. I can tell that you’ve had some musical theatre training before in your life because you turned it out tonight.
Porcelain: Alright contestants, the judges and I have some decisions to make. Please proceed backstage and untuck.
[One untucked later, the contestants all return to the main stage.]
Porcelain: Blu Haze, tonight you were the wild card and shocked us all. Dee Pression, you lived up to your background - both in the musical, and on the runway. Zodya Killer, you came out of nowhere and left us wanting more. Zodya Killer









Condragulations you are the winner of this week's challenge. You have won a weekend getaway to the Arctic circle, brought to you by Crunch Cruise Lines. Thank you so much for your hard work tonight. This means that Blu Haze, and Dee Pression you are both safe.
NV Lullaby, tonight you sang us all to sleep.
Dom Marlboro Riddle, tonight you crashed and burned.
Butter Nugget, tonight you dropped the ball again with your greasy hands.
NV Lullaby









You are safe. Please proceed to the back of the stage.
Two artists stand before me. Dom Marlboro Riddle
 Butter Nugget.. Tonight you were asked to prepare a lip sync to “He Hit Me And It Felt Like A Kiss” by The Crystals. Good luck, and don’t fuck it up.
[Homophone starts to play “He Hit Me And It Felt Like A Kiss” by The Crystals.]
He hit me
And it felt like a kiss
He hit me
But it didn't hurt me
[Dom starts off by taking off their prosthetics, allowing themself to give a more emotional performance. Butter Nugget starts off dramatic, using their costume to its fullest potential.]
He couldn't stand to hear me say
That I'd been with someone new
And when I told him I had been untrue
He hit me
And it felt like a kiss
He hit me
And I knew he loves me
[Free from her prosthetics, Dom starts serving true emotion. She is mouthing every word with great poise and elegance. Porcelain starts to tear up. Butter Nugget looks defeated but they keep trying their best trying to emote.]
If he didn't care for me
I could have never made him mad
But he hit me
And I was glad
Yes, he hit me
And it felt like a kiss
He hit me
And I knew I loved him
And then he took me in his arms
With all the tenderness there is
And when he kissed me
He made me his
[As the song ends Dom keeps selling emotion, tears fall down her face. Butter Nugget falls on the ground, trying to sell the best emotional performance she can. The song concludes. The contestants in the back clap. Porcelain and the judges discuss for a moment.]
Porcelain: All right
 ladies. The judges and I have made our decision. Dom Marlboro Riddle







Shantay you stay.
Dom Marlboro Riddle: Thank you so much judges, I promise I will never be in the bottom two again. [Dom tearfully hugs Butter and walks to the back of the stage.]
Porcelain: My sweet, sweet, sweet Butter Nugget. I’m going to have to ask you to sashay away.
[The contestants all clap for Butter Nugget as she leaves. She screams.]
Butter Nugget: My nuggets will always be bigger than yours!
[Everyone claps, the judges give her a standing ovation.]

https://preview.redd.it/gckidvno4m881.png?width=498&format=png&auto=webp&s=608109955730317007776363f3552c61d3736256
submitted by Serious_Butterscotch to DeePressionsDragRace [link] [comments]


2021.12.29 17:39 Sovetika SOVPAS.com: 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - s507

SOVPAS.com: 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - s507 submitted by Sovetika to SovPas [link] [comments]


2021.12.24 22:53 Sovetika 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costume - h1566

1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costume - h1566 submitted by Sovetika to PastYears [link] [comments]


2021.12.24 22:53 Sovetika 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costume - h1566

1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costume - h1566 submitted by Sovetika to histpics [link] [comments]


2021.12.21 15:38 Sovetika SOVPAS.com: 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - s442

SOVPAS.com: 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - s442 submitted by Sovetika to SovPas [link] [comments]


2021.11.20 23:53 Sovetika 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - h1130

1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - h1130 submitted by Sovetika to PastYears [link] [comments]


2021.11.20 23:53 Sovetika 1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - h1130

1967. Jane Fonda photographed by David Hurn in her Barbarella costumes - h1130 submitted by Sovetika to histpics [link] [comments]


2021.11.14 02:20 fleemfleemfleemfleem Contemporary fashion in visual sci-fi

I've noticed that there's been a change in the way that fashion is depicted in sci-fi, and I'm wondering what led to it.
In a lot of past sci-fi costumes were futuristic and reflective of new technology at the time it was made like skintight fabrics, metallic or plastic textiles, etc.
It's always interesting to see different visions of how a future culture might dress, and how different designers conceptualized that future.
Barbarella has very different ideas about future fashion than star trek, or forbidden planet.
At some point it seems like that creativity dropped off. Look at the clothes from the old Battlestar Galactica compared to the newer.
Or the 60s Trek uniforms to the 2009 versions that look like mesh workout shirts with more muted colors.
The Netflix lost in space crew looks like they shop at Kohls.
I can get why something like firefly that's basically a period piece would choose period clothing, but I have the impression that an area with a lot of room for artistic interpretation and creativity has been lost.
Is there a particular inflection point or change that explains the shift? Am I imagining thing?
submitted by fleemfleemfleemfleem to scifi [link] [comments]


2021.08.15 23:15 malmo777 What type of paint is best for turning fabric metallic?

Hi all! I’m making a Barbarella Halloween costume with a silver bodysuit and silver boots. The body suit I bought is extremely metallic, kind of like the episode of spongebob where everything is chrome. My boots are not as vibrant. Silver, but not as shiny as the body suit. They were $5 and just for the costume so I really don’t care about the longevity. What kind of paints have any of you used on fabric? I was thinking the “mirror effect” spray paint but am not sure how it looks on non-glass. Would acrylic paint be any better? I’m trying to be cost effective since it’s a wear-once outfit. I may not even paint them at all but it would be cool to see them shinier! I’m no fabric expert but the boots certainly feel like an extremely cheap faux leather. Thanks in advance for any insight!
submitted by malmo777 to crafts [link] [comments]


2021.04.14 05:52 Sufficient_Promise88 [TOMT][MOVIE][80s/90s?]Scene from a movie - like Waterworld, but with ice?

I'm trying to find the name of a movie that I swear I saw once flipping through channels on a Saturday in either the late 90s or early 00s. The scene I remember had a couple who were in what I am pretty sure was a catamaran on some ice, they were wearing furs (as if the costume design were inspired by Inuit clothes?) and they were definitely about to get it on inside the cabin of the catamaran on a big pile of furs. I've tried describing this scene IRL to be told "sounds like Waterworld," only there definitely isn't any ice in Waterworld. However, as the title implies, I have the vague memory that "like Waterworld, if Waterworld were Iceworld" might be a fair description of this movie (or at least it might be a fair description of the part of it I can vaguely recall). I appreciate any suggestions! :)
EDIT: This would have aired on The WB or possibly UPN on a Saturday in the late 90s, I am pretty sure. (So, I'm pretty sure it can't be Barbarella per a below suggestion -- also I recall very different costumes and... general, like, lighting, goofy as that sounds.) I'm trying to find historical TV schedule listings so I may solve it on my own, but in the meanwhile, I'm still grateful for suggestions. Thank you! :D
submitted by Sufficient_Promise88 to tipofmytongue [link] [comments]


2021.03.25 22:43 TheShape108 Wanna Play a Game Week 11: Barbarella 1968

(original inspiration post https://www.reddit.com/badMovies/comments/kt58lj/i_wanna_play_a_game_subject_me_to_your_worst/)
Oh baby I am hype for today but I have been given an absolute gift in RNG coming up 44 which is Barbarella from 1968 submitted by u/Milo-Belmorte. I’ve seen this movie like 50 times, its terrible and extremely French but comparatively speaking to the rest of this stuff it might as well be Godfather Part 2. There is a Jay Mohr bit from a TV Show that I can’t remember or find where he goes on a 3 minute rant about how much he loves Jane Fonda and how Barbarella was puberty for him and like Jay Mohr sucks but I agree on that one point, its also sort of a sneaky(obvious) BDSM movie. It’s a real cult film and I think has influenced so much other cinema and Directors, especially if you’re European, that I will feel slightly bad mocking it but also its soooooooo easy to do. Granted its from the 1960’s so you know the special effects and costumes and all that you have to put in context but honestly I’d say its still an extremely well shot and good looking movie its just the completely nonsense story that you can take to task.
*98 minutes later*
Yeah I mean, its awesome, its total an utter nonsense that exists entirely to find reasons to get Jane Fonda in sexy outfits and situations. It’s the sort of thing John Derek watched and got ideas for movies for Bo Derek. There is at the most 15 minutes of movie here the rest is Barbarella aimlessly roaming around cheesy sets just looking at weird stuff that is never explained or really addressed after it happens and I love it. All the credit to Fonda, she could have reacted like “wow that’s a dumb thing” but instead she keeps the same wonder you’re supposed to have with “WOW, look at that dumb thing!” and it helps so much. It’s just a blast of a cheesy 60’s sex romp, free on amazon and I would seek it out.
*Real time thoughts below*
The Paramount logo which feels out of place in the movies I normally watch on here.
Somehow Dino De Laurentis doesn’t though

You know this opening montage where Jane Fonda floats around more or less naked while the credits play and her body is lovingly shot from every angle accomplishes two things: 1. You know exactly the movie you’re in for. 2. Making you feel weird that her husband is the Director.
For once I can say I am glad I stopped playing Huniepop 2 for this
Man this is some very swinging 60s music and I am very into it.
That space suit coming apart at the seams with the slightest tug make me feel like it wouldn’t be the most effective space suit
Someday I hope to be credited with “special guest appearance as Dildano”
So not the worst font in the world on the credits but again just so French.
No offense to Jane Fonda at all, she’s gorgeous, but imagine if they had been able to get Raquel Welch or Sophia Lauren like they wanted?
Literally 5 minutes into a 90 minute movie and so far its just been Jane Fonda stripping but not in a salacious way and like why didn’t this win 1000 oscars?
I feel like this is why video calling replacing your telephone never took off because maybe you just got doing stripping in zero-g for no reason and our laying on your shag rug naked when the President of Space calls you.
Barbarella “Oh Hello Mr. President, hang on let me put some clothes on” President “Don’t trouble yourself”. 1000 years into the future and we still got pervy presidents!
Also LOL at America ever electing a French President
Oh that’s right, this is where Duran Duran comes from isn’t it? And isn’t The Fab Five a Duran Duran thing? Man this movies reaches across the generations.
HER NAME IS BARBARELLA AND SHE DANCES IN THE SAND
How would everyone feel about Duran Duran lyrics anytime he’s mentioned in this movie? I’d offer doing a shot instead but I don’t want to die.
The posotronic ray not used by psychotronic man
I never get sci-fi like this, where it’s the future and people don’t understand fighting or war or conflict, society has become completely pacified. Maybe I’m just jaded but I don’t think humanity is ever going to be capable of this. Also the very fact that you were building a posotronic ray and that people would want to use it kinda moots out that everything is free love and peace.
Barbarella “Why me?” President “You’re the best space person and I can’t spare my band”
I honestly give Jane a lot of credit, she’s a good actress so her dough eyed confused and bewildered performance here is I think a choice and she’s playing it really well. She must know this is crap but she’s taking it seriously and that goes miles.
I do kinda remember that after she gets her mission and heads out this movie falls to shit real quick though, the realization of the setup is the problem not the setup.
Come on, walk behind a curtain and come back out dressed is the easiest effect in the world, you cut and you roll but they can’t even get the lighting right on the cut so the whole scene moves about a foot
just lazy.
God the inside of that ship which is entirely fur lined must be so fucking comfortable and so fucking stinky. Every foot step should just jettison a cloud of dust out.
I didn’t watch the credits enough because I was distracted by
you know
everything happening behind them but is Vincent Price the voice of the ship because if he’s not then it’s the world’s greatest Vincent Price impersonator.
After waking from your sleep, getting naked and then plotting a course its best to relax with a nice 154 hour nap.
I’m about to insert some nourishment myself!
Her little leotard with mesh covering her boobs and the plastic cover over them like her boobs are a video game at Target brings me endless joy. Like, time to get undressed, let me take scissors and spend 20 minutes slicing the shit out of my hand to cut these off.
What a useless view screen, it just shows the inside of a lava lamp instead of
outside.
She’s supposed to be a great pilot but literally all she does is sit here and yell at computer Vincent Price
Is she part cat or something? She just slept for 154 hours and is yawning still.
Not sure if anyone picked up on it, its pretty subtle, but that spaceship and the exit hole look an awful lot like a vagina.
God I miss shooting on a soundstage, its not a great look but its unique and weird, it feels real in some capacity because everything is a physical object.
I don’t even know where to start, dubbed over creepy twins, Barbarella switching her plastic boob clamshell out for a metal bikini/cape combo that is stunning, the fact that her translator is called a ‘Tongue box’
gross, or that the girls put the stone used to knock her out in a snowball to throw it. Why? She wasn’t looking at you, just chuck a rock at her.
This fat guy tuba music doesn’t match up at all to the scene
Yeah 60’s electric guitar jamming, now that’s skiing with a land sting ray music
I talk a lot about reactions to situations, like did you just crash on an alien planet, attacked by creepy twins, tied up, sled dogging behind land sting ray, the face should be one of terror but she looks pretty happy to feel the wind in her hair.
I’M ON THE HUNT I’M AFTER YOU, SMELL LIKE I SOUND, I’M LOST WITH SOME CREEPY TWINS AND I’M HUNGRY LIKE THE LAND STINGRAY
An entire planet of creepy twins
guess we know where Josef Mengele really went after WWII
Man what’s worse than creepy Asian twins? Creepy Ginger Twins

Oh god creepy dolls
CREEPY DOLL ALERT! THEY’RE MOVING!
WHY WOULD ANYONE MAKE THESE?! THEY’RE JUST NIGHTMARES!
Man these kids are the worst
Marquis de Sade thinks they’re maybe a bit too much into torture.
This is totally a 60’s sci-fi thing where its supposed to be another world so they speak another language but no subtitles or anything so we’re just as confused as Barbarella is as to WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?!
Thank god an adult is here to murder these children.
Good shoot em with a net, I hope its electrified.
How did those 2 foot tall dolls bite her shoulders.
I like that the guy makes a face when the tongue box makes him speak English, so presumably it doesn’t just translate what Barbarella hears its like a sphere of influence that forces you to speak English around her
like an American Conservative’s dream device.
Couldn’t get Franco Nero for this huh? Just this other Italian guy who wishes he was Franco Nero.
I love the idea of throwing children into the frozen icy tundra until they’re old enough to be useful and then enslaving them for manual labor, that’s my 2024 platform really.
NO, DON’T SAY A PRAYER FOR THE ENSLAVED TWINS NOW. SAVE IT ‘TIL THE MORNING AFTER BARBARELLA
ADR lines so good her lips weren’t even moving.
This guy is so Italian, I don’t think the character calls for him to be lecherous but he is just eye fucking Jane Fonda every step they take.
So we crashed and skied over here and now we are taking a windship right back again to the crash
“You could do me one favor, make love to me” “well I guess but I don’t see what good it will do” clearly you haven’t met a lot of men in your life, Barbarella.
Honestly its great that in the 60’s you could just make softcore porn and put it in theaters as a ‘swinging 60’s romp’ and no one batted an eye. I’ve seen actual porn with more justification for characters fucking than this.
This matching psychocardio gram and taking a pill and then laying there while your minds have sex thing makes me understand how much Demolition Man ripped this off
Holy shit great value brand Franco Nero took off his fur suit and is somehow furrier under it, why does he even need that, his natural body hair is thick enough to keep him warm.
Seriously actual furies don’t have as much fur as this dudes chest.
Not one single hair out of place on his head after giving Jane Fonda the night of her life, he is all that is man.
Nonsense that ultra bleeding heart Jane Fonda would wear fur.
Does she need to have the 5 foot tail on the dress because this is some actual furry nonsense.
It’s a total “you know nothing Jon Snow” moment here, she hasn’t had actual sex ever and so this guy could have been awful, lasted 3 seconds and she’s still basically walking around in a post sex haze an hour later.
Visible string lifting up the ship, again lazy editing.
Lol its like if in a porn you fuck the mechanic to get your car fixed and they bothered to show the lady driving away and all the wheels falling off because damnit Jim he’s a pornstar not a mechanic.
Jane’s physical comedy as Barbarella is again actually pretty on point.
Not since Jack Burton has the action hero of a movie been so incredibly clumsy and bad at being an action hero. This chick gets knocked out more than CM Punk in MMA.
Pour one out for one of the all time ultra hunks of cinema, John Phillip Law.
God just a bevy of sci-fi crap names, I’m Pygar I was blinded by the Great Tyrant Sogo but saved by Dr. Ping. Pygar here is an angle but blind and doing a decent job of blind acting I will say.
You think the child enslaver that she recently had sex with as payment for fixing her ship(shes the hero by the way) would have mentioned that Sogo where he is sending her is a military dictatorship.
WILD ANGELS NEVER LOSE IT, WILD ANGELS NEVER CHOSE THIS WAY, WILD ANGELS NEVER CLOSE YOUR(BLIND) EYES, WILD ANGELS ALWAYS SHINE
You could fill the library of alexandria with the amount of shit people on this planet don’t know
Good to know these people trapped in the maze for all time until they’re consumed by it still have the will to wake up every morning and make sure their makeup is FABULOUS!
Dr. Ping here
gonna need to see that medical degree because so far all you did was put a shot glass on your head, stare at her tits and say “you’re a woman, yes?”
The city is dedicated to evil in all forms? So it’s a floating Ohio State University?
CAN YOU READ MY BOOBS, CAN YOU SEE IN THE MAZE, AND FIERY DR. PINGS ALL DANCE WHEN YOU WALK THROUGH THE SOGO
Pygar will you show us the way
what? He’s blind, did you not just keep track of the direction you walked?
“What seems to be the trouble?” I don’t know maybe the giant hole in the side of the ship. At least Mando isn’t trapped here with a giant ice spider.
Holy shit! First off where did she get that pistol, guns don’t exist, second off its like the noisy cricket, it just exploded that dude.
Lol, an hour ago she was anti P in V sex and now its all “Pygar, you saved my life” hard cut to her naked in a giant birds nest
what a movie.
Man she fucked that angel so well he can literally fly now, then again he also has never had sex before

She also has a mini missile projector?! Got a goddamn arsenal like she’s Wesley Snipes robbing a future Museum.
And a killer new sexy outfit. I like to imagine the last one having thigh high boots linked to her leotard made it impossible to walk so here we have a quick outfit change due to sex.
Man this movie makes like 83% of the outfits on RuPaul’s Dragrace make sense now.
No knowledge of weapons or war or any instinct to violence and yet a crack shot with a weapon she’s never used before.
Well
its not quite the Death Star trench run
or even the hawk fight in Flash Gordon really.
“My Energy Box is completely empty” said Jane Fonda never.
It was nice of Pygar to get you there but honestly now you’re trying to sneak around a city with a blind angel and it just seems like a liability. Maybe have him wait behind a trash can or something.
“I sense danger” “there is nothing I promise you” she says standing in front of a freshly murdered body.
To be fair in a city of pure evil the threat of sexual violence does seem like it would be constant.
Hell yeah eyepatch lady, murdered the balls off those guys and you have a Teletubby window in your outfit that goes to your vagina so that’s fun.
How will you find Pygar? Perhaps follow this trail of comically oversized feathers.
The city of pure evil really seems like more of a city of whiny high school bullies who just kind of menacingly follow you around snapping like its West Side Story.
Chamber of Ultimate Solution? This is Josef Mengele’s planet!
Wait so it’s a room with three doors and certain death is behind them, who built this? Is it the institute who made THE CUBE!?
“A lake of liquid flesh composed with positive magnetic waves which gives it a charge of negative psychological energy that keeps us warm” okay movie, you got it.
Are these creepy twin girls the creepy Mothra Twins? Or Paul Atredis little sister in David Lynch’s Dune? They talk in exactly the same voice.
So much pseudo bondage gear in this scene.
Okay so why shoot her down that weird slide chute if you’re just going to meet her at the bottom and take her somewhere, why not just like
take her there. This entire movie is 8 minutes long if everyone’s plan isn’t to put Barbarella somewhere and let her aimlessly wander around a bit looking confused at what she is seeing before walking up and being like “here come with me, the plot is this way” BUT IT NEVER ACTUALLY IS!
Again this music is swinging but it doesn’t match up at all with “Meeting the evil queen”
Say the name! Don’t play with me

Yesssssss: UNTIL WE DANCE INTO THE FIREEEE, THAT SOGO TYRANT QUEEN IS ALL WE NEED, DANCE INTO THE FIRE
Why did this one random lady on this alien planet randomly develop a British Accent?
Boo movie, you’ve got the balls to do everything but crucify this angel like Jesus, lame.
Well that was a fun rescue attempt, anyways back on the crucifying table
Or the sex table I guess, sadly angels can’t get it up for people made of pure evil.
How bad of a hero are you when you’re getting killed by parakeets
Every animal she encounters manages to bite her in the way needed to rip her clothing and show off her abs.
Unsurprisingly a guy named Dildano is kind of a loser.
“Are all Earth women like you?” “I’m about average” I’m sorry, what? In a movie of negative magnetic flesh lakes, dildanos, Sogo Tyrants that is the most ridiculous line of dialogue uttered.
Dildano frantically crawling around this room trying to find the sex pill is 100% me a decade ago when a date asked “do you have a condom?”
SOMEWHERE I DO, YES, JUST STAY RIGHT THERE I’LL FIND IT
Dildano, man, you don’t want to have real sex with her anyways, she has at least twice in the last day and as far as I can tell hasn’t gone to the bathroom or showered once.
Ballpark estimate, how many takes did it take to film this scene without either of them bursting out laughing. And how bummed was this actor to be told “you get to have sex with jane fonda in this movie” and then find out its comedy hand holding sex unlike every other male actor here.
I DON’T WANT YOUR DILDANO TO BRING ME DOWN, I DON’T WANT YOUR DILDANO TO TURN ME AROUND
This secret uniform is
incredible, one boob under black leather, they other in a clear plastic cup with nipple, Joel Schumacher watched this a lot as a kid didn’t he?
“The Black Queen is only vulnerable at one time” Pretty sure Barbarella just grabbed her in public and put a gun to her head, seemed to work alright
just saying.
I like that he hides his radio in his bed, as if someone were to come into this secret base full of revolutionary warriors and be like “well this is fine but you better not have any radios around here
.”
Only an invisible key can open an invisible door
I mean that checks out to me.
It’s a world of bondage and bubble wrap, like an Amazon warehouse.
I guess as a world of pure evil you just sit around smoking hookah all day because drugs are evil.
Literally 45 seconds to get captured again, she is monumentally bad at this.
Yesssssssss dildo piano! The greatest moment in this and any other movie.
So it’s a piano that when you play a tune it gives you the most intense pleasure you’ve ever felt in your life until you die and how is he not playing Ultimate Fuck Song by Moby really?
I guess the two times she has ever had sex which came in the last few hours makes her the greatest sexual powerhouse who ever lived.
IN EXPLOITATION’S NAME
WE MUST BE WORKING FOR THE DILDO PIANO TRADE.
“Have you no shame!” Oh I’m sorry, are we slut shaming Barbarella because her libido is so strong she burned out your dildo piano? Grow up dude, grow up and get a better dildo piano.
“Can you hand me a garment”, first off hell of a time to get bashful about nudity, second off why is he helping her?
This green number she is wearing looks like Emerald City clothing from the Wizard of Oz porn parody.
You sir are no Master of the Universe, that is Frank Langella and Frank Langella alone.
More Barbarella wandering around confused, they must have really thought these sets and effects were amazing and needed to be showcased.
The Queens army is kind of a softcore version of House Harkkonen if you think about it. Duran Duran even kinda looks like Baron Harkkonen or a Mentat with those eyebrows.
HOW DOES IT FEEL, WHEN THE MATMOS FLESH LAKE SURROUNDS YOU? HOW DO YOU DEAL, DO POSOTRONIC RAYS MAKE YOU FEEL LONELY
Honestly if this city burns down it means all those creepy twins are dead so its kind of a win win really.
So we’re just hanging out with the evil queen now, we’re like buddies?
Gonna be a hell of a threesome, the most innocent person in the galaxy, an angel and the Black Queen of all that is evil.
An angel has no memory? What? How does he remember Barbarel
you know what, fuck it.
And that’s it I guess, what happened or why? Don’t concern yourself with it.
submitted by TheShape108 to badMovies [link] [comments]


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