Quick speech for farewell to coworker

CAPUT I
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Know, therefore, that the purpose of this book is to describe the four kinds of spirit-men, namely, the water people, the mountain people, the fire people and the wind people. Included among these four kinds are the giants, the melusines, the Venusberg and what is similar to them.
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How things are in relation to us will have to be described in the following order:
First, their creation and what they are;
second, their country and habitation, where they stay and what their mode of living is;
third, how they come to us and let themselves be seen, how they mix and have intercourse with us;
fourth, how they perform some miraculous works, such as Melusine, the Venusberg and similar stories;
fifth, the birth of the giants and their origin, and also their vanishing and return.
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CAPUT SECUNDUM
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The flesh must be understood thus that there are two: the flesh from Adam and that which is not from Adam. The flesh from Adam is a coarse flesh, for it is earthen and is nothing else but a flesh that can be bound and grasped like wood or a stone. The other flesh which is not from Adam, is a subtile flesh and can not be bound nor grasped, for it is not made from earth. Now, the flesh from Adam is the man from Adam. He is coarse like the earth which is compact. And, therefore, man cannot go through a wall. He must make a hole to slip through, because nothing recedes before him.
But before the flesh that is not from Adam, walls recede, which means that such flesh does not require doors nor holes; it goes through intact walls and does not break anything. They are both flesh, blood, bone and so on, whatever belongs to a man, and in their whole nature they are like man’s. But they are different in that they have a double origin like two cousins; they are in equal way like a spirit and like man. The spirit goes through all walls and nothing locks him out; man, however, not, for he is locked out by the bolt or the lock.
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With all this, they bear children, talk and eat, drink and walk—things that spirits do not. Hence, they are like the spirits in speed, like man in gestures, figure and eating, and so they are people who have the character of spirits and also that of man, and both are one in them. Although they are both spirit and man, yet they are neither one nor the other. They cannot be men, since they are spiritlike in their behaviour. They cannot be spirits, since they eat and drink, have blood and flesh. Therefore, they are a creation of their own, outside the two,... It must be understood further that although they are spirit and man, yet they are neither. Man has a soul, the spirit not. The spirit has no soul, but man has one. This creature, however, is both, but has no soul, and yet is not identical with a spirit. For, the spirit does not die, but this creature dies. And so it is not like man, it has not the soul; it is a beast, yet higher than a beast.
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Now, they are separated from us because they are not from Adam and do not participate in the same earth from which Adam was made, but God has decreed that we may see them miraculously, which has a particular meaning, as will be discussed in the last treatise. They have children and their children are their kind, not ours. They are witty, rich, clever, poor, dumb like we who are from Adam. They resemble us in every way. Just as one says: man is the image of God, that is, he has been made after his image—in the same way one can also say: these people are the image of man and made after his image.
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And so they are men and people, die with the beasts, walk with the spirits, eat and drink with men. That is: like the beasts they die, so that nothing is left; and neither water nor fire harms them, like the spirits, and nobody can lock them up, like the spirits, but they reproduce like men and therewith share his nature. They have man’s diseases and his health but their medicine is not from the earth from which man is made, but from the element in which they live. They die like men, but are dead like the beasts. Their flesh rots like other flesh and their bones like other men’s bones and nothing remains of it. Their customs and behaviour are human, as is their way of talking, with all virtues, better and coarser, more subtile and rougher. The same applies to their figures : they are very different, like men. In food they are like men, eat and enjoy the product of their labor, spin and weave their own clothing. They know how to make use of things, have wisdom to govern, justice to preserve and protect. For although they are beasts, they have all the reason of man, except the soul.
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TRACTATUS II - ABOUT THEIR ABODE
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Their abode is of four kinds, namely, according to the four elements : one in the water, one in the air, one in the earth, one in the fire. Those in the water are nymphs, those in the air are sylphs, those in the earth are pygmies, those in the fire salamanders. These are not good names, but I use them nevertheless.
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The name of the water people is also undina, and of the air people sylvestres, and of the mountain people gnomi, and of the fire people vulcani rather than salamandri.
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Now you must know that if their regions have to be described, they must be divided into their parts. For the water people have no intercourse with the mountain people, nor the mountain people with them, nor the salamanders.
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The undinae have their abode in water, and the water is given to them as to us the air, and just as we are astonished that they should live in water, they are astonished about our being in the air. The same applies to the gnomi in the mountains: the earth is their air and is their chaos. For everything lives in chaos, that is: everything has its abode in chaos, walks and stands therein. Now, the earth is not more than mere chaos to the mountain manikins. For they walk through solid walls, through rocks and stones, like a spirit; this is why these things are all mere chaos to them, that is, nothing. That amounts to: as little as we are hampered by the air, as little are they hampered by the mountain, by earth and rocks.
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Since water is the fish’s air, the fish does not drown, and so the unda does not drown either. As in the water, so in the earth: the earth is air to the gnomi; hence they do not suffocate. They do not require our air, we do not theirs. Thus also with the salamanders: fire is their air, as our air our air is. And the sylvestres are closest to us, for they too maintain themselves in our air, and they are exposed to the same kind of death as we, namely: they burn in fire, and we too; they drown in water, and we too; they suffocate in the earth, and we too. For, each remains healthy in his chaos; in the others he dies.
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Let us philosophize further, about their food ... The sylphs are like men, nourish themselves like men in the wilderness, on herbs in the woods. To the salamanders the soil is earth, their heaven is the air, and fire their chaos. Thus food grows to them from the earth and from fire, and the constellation from air is their heaven.
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About their clothing: they are clothed and cover their genitalia, but not in the way of our world, in their own way. For they have modesty and similar qualities, as men must have, have law and similar institutions, have their authorities, [etc.] ... To the beasts clothing is inborn by nature, but not to these people. To them nothing is inborn by nature; they must work for it like man whom they resemble. Their work, like man’s work, is in the nature and kind of their own world and earth on which they live.
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**About their figures, know that they are different. The water people look like men, both women and men. The sylvestres do not conform, but are cruder, coarser, longer and stronger than both. The mountain people are small, of about two spans. The salamanders are long, narrow and lean. Their place and abode are in their chaos, as was mentioned before. The nymphs live in water, in running brooks, etc., so close that they grasp the people who ride through or bathe therein. The mountain people are in the mountain chaos, and there they build their houses. This is why it often happens that one finds in the earth an attic, vaults, and similar structures, of the height of about a yard. They have been build by these people for their abode and dwellings.
The water people do the same in their various places. Know also that the mountain people live in the caves of the mountains and this is why strange structures occur and are found in such places. These are their work. Know also about the fire people whose yelling, hammering and working can be heard in volcanic mountains. It can also be heard when the elements are incinerated. For all these things are the same as with us, but according to their secret quality. Those who travel through wild regions learn the reason for such beings and obtain information. There these beings are found. In the mines also, close to good ore, etc. they are found, and in waters the same also, and the vulcans near the Aetna. And there are many more marvellous things, about their coins, payments and customs, which would be too long in this connection, but will be described in their place.**
TRACTATUS III - HOW THEY COME TO US AND BECOME VISIBLE TO US
All that God has created, he reveals to man and lets come before him, so that man has and attains knowledge of all happenings of the creatures.
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And in order that we may have a good knowledge of things, the water people have not only been truly seen by man, but have married him and have born him children. Thus also, the mountain people have not only been seen, but people saw them, and talked to them, and received money from them and blows and similar things. The same happened with the forest people, as was mentioned before, the people saw them and dealt and walked with them. Thus also, with the vulcans, who also, as mentioned before, appeared to man, and revealed themselves essentially, who they were and what had to be understood of them all.
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The nymphs, namely, become apparent to us, but not we to them, except in what they tell about us in their world, as a pilgrim would, who had been in foreign lands. They do not need such rapture, the way the mountain people enrapture us, or the water people. For they have no power over man, and their world is not such that they could adopt us. Man is not subtile in body, but coarse in body and subtile in chaos, while it is the contrary with them. Therefore, they can well stand our chaos, but not we theirs. Their element also is in itself their chaos, which to us may not be chaos. Thus they appear to us, stay with us, marry with us, die with us, and also bear children.
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This happens with the water people. They come out of their waters to us, make themselves known, act and deal with us, go back to their water, come again—all this to allow man the contemplation of the divine works. Now, they are men, but on the animal side alone, without the soul. From this it follows that they marry men. A water woman takes a man from Adam, and keeps house for him, and gives birth to children. Of the children, we know that they follow after the father. Because the father is a man from Adam, a soul is given to the child, and it becomes like a regular man, who has an eternal soul. ... Just as the condition of these people is, when they are in union with man, so is the condition of man, when he is in union with God.
From this it follows that they woo man, and that they seek him assiduously and in secret. ... they seek love with man, so as to be in union with men. With them all intelligence and wisdom are outside the qualities of the soul, and not the soul.
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One must also know that not all of them may be married to us. The water people come first; they are the closest to us. Next after them come the forest people, then the mountain and earth manikins who, however, rarely marry humans and are only obliged to serve them. The vulcans never attempt to enter into union with humans, and yet are apt to serve them. Know also that two of them, namely the earth manikins and vulcans, are considered spirits and not creatures, being looked upon as a mirage only, or as ghosts. You must know, however, that just as they appear, thus they are, flesh and blood like another man, and with that, quick and fast like a spirit, as was told in the beginning. They also know all future affairs, present affairs and the past, which are not apparent but are hidden. In that they can serve man, protect, warn, guide him, and such like. For they have reason in common with man (except in regard to the soul). They have knowledge and intelligence of the spirit (except in regard to God). Thus they are highly gifted, and they know and warn, so that man may learn about such things, and see them, and believe in such creatures.
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It is said of the nymphs, that they come to us from the water, and sit on the banks of the brooks where they have their abode, where they are seen, taken also, caught, and married, as we said before. The forest people, however, are coarser than they. They do not talk, that is, they cannot talk although they have tongues and enough of all that is needed for speech. In this point they differ from the nymphs, for the nymphs can speak in the languages of the countries; the forest people, however, cannot but they learn easily.
The mountain manikins are endowed with speech like the nymphs, and the vulcans speak nothing, yet they can speak but roughly and rarely. The nymphs appear, as was said before, in human clothing, with human features and desires. The forest people are like men, but shy and fugitive. The mountain people are like men, not tall, short; sometimes they reach about half the size of man or so, sometimes more. Thus and in the same way, the vulcans appear, fiery, and fire is all over their features and clothing.
They are the ones of whom one says: a fire man or spirit is going through the house; there goes a burning soul, etc. It often happens that such figures are seen. They also are the flames that are frequently observed as glowing lights in meadows and fields, running through each other and towards each other. These are the vulcans, but they are not found living with man, on account of their fire. They are often found with old women, however, that is, with witches, wooing them.
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You must know, however, that there is danger with the fire people, because they are commonly possessed, and the devil thus rages in them, which causes great harm to man. Know also that he equally takes possession of the mountain people and thus makes them subservient to him, and of the forest people also. He then can be found in the forest possessing sylphs and venturing to make love to women who live in forest regions. But they all become like lepers, scabby and mangy, and there is no help for them either.
When these beings are not possessed by the devil they are human and seek union as has been mentioned. But they keep the way of spirits, in that they disappear. One who has a nymph for a wife, should not let her get close to any water, or at least should not offend her while they are on water. And one who has a mountain manikin with him, should not offend him, particularly not at places where they get lost. But they are so much obliged to man and so closely bound to him, that they cannot get away from him, unless there is a reason for it, and this happens at the place from which they come. If one has a wife, she does not get away from him, unless she is provoked while they are on water. Otherwise she will not disappear and can be held. The mountain manikins also must keep their pledges, when they are in service and have been pledged.
But obligations to them must be kept also, in all that is due to them. If duties are kept as should be, they are honest, constant, and intent on their work. And one must know that they are particularly loyal to man and much inclined to spending money. For, the mountain people have money, because they themselves coin it. This is how it must be understood. What a spirit wishes to have, he has, and their wishing and desiring is thus: when a mountain manikin wishes or desires a sum of money, if there is need for it, he has it, and it is good money. Thus they give money to many people in the galleries of mountains, to make them get away; they buy them off. All this is divine order— that they thus appear to us and that we see what is incredible to tell. Man is the most earthbound of all creatures. What he must have and wants, he must make for himself, and he obtains nothing by wishing and desiring it. But those people have what they need and desire, and man does nothing for it. They have it without work.
TRACTATUS IV
As we came to the end of the treatise, we had sufficiently discussed the necessities of these beings, and how they come to man. You must now, furthermore, know about their disappearance from man, and about their doings with us, with many such tales and stories that have happened with them, in many queer ways.
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It also happens that sirens are born. They are water women too, but live more on the water than in it. They are not split like fish, but are more like a virgin, yet their form is not quite that of a woman. They bear no children but are monsters, just as a strange human being can be born from two normal parents. I would like to put it thus: the water people reproduce themselves like humans, but when it happens that they produce a monster, these monsters are sirens that swim on the water, for they repudiate them and do not keep them. This is why they occur in many forms and figures, as it happens and is the case with all monsters.
Thus we marvel not only at the water people but also at the sirens, who have many strange features and are very different from people. Some can sing, some can whistle with reeds, some can do this and that. Monks are also born from nymphs, that is, a monster which is shaped just like a monk. This you must know, namely, that such growths that are comparable to men and are found in some places, come from men, that is, they come from water people, earth manikins and similar beings.
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To continue the discussion of these beings, know that such people also convene and assemble in one place, where they may live together and seek intercourse with man, for they love him. ... There are more women than men in such groups, few men, many women; hence they are after men whenever they have a chance. From such people a group originated that is called the Venusberg. It consists of nothing else but a kind of nymphs, thrown together in a cave and hole of their world, yet not in their own chaos, in man’s chaos, but in their regionibus. Know about them that they reach a very old age, but you cannot notice it, because their appearance remains the same from beginning to end, and they die unchanged. Venus was a nymph and undine who excelled others and reigned for a long time, but she died and the succeeding Venus was not as endowed as she had been. She died in the course of time and her kingdom vanished. There are many tales about her.
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There is a story about a different beginning. It tells of a queen who resided there and sank into the earth. It was a water woman who resided there. She went into the mountain, under the pond that was above her, in her region. There she took her abode, and for making love, she built a gallery, for her to get to the lads and they to her. Such strange things happened there that nobody was able to report about these beings, what they were or where they were from, until it came to an end. It is quite possible that this could happen again should another nymph come, equal to her.
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There is also a true story of the nymph in Staufenberg who sat on the road in all her beauty and served the lord she had chosen. ... Our nymph was a water woman. She promised herself to von Staufenberg and stayed also with him, until he married another wife, and took her for a devil. Taking her for a devil and considering her such, he married another woman and thus broke his promise to her. Therefore, at the wedding, she gave him the sign, through the ceiling, during the banquet, and three days later, he was dead.
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We must pay equally great attention to Melusine, for she was not what the theologians considered her, but a nympha. It is true, however, that she was possessed by the evil spirit, of which she would have freed herself if she had stayed with her husband to the end. For such is the devil that he transforms these beings into different shapes, as he also does with the witches, transforming them into cats and werewolves, dogs, etc. This happened to her also, for she never was free of witchcraft but had a part in it. A superstitious belief resulted, that on Saturdays she had to be a serpent. This was her pledge to the devil for his helping her in getting a man. Otherwise, she was a nympha, with flesh and blood, fertile and well built to have children. She came from the nymphs to the humans on earth and lived there. But then, as superstitio seduces and vexes all beings, she went away from her people in her superstitious belief, to the places where the seduced people come who are bewitched in superstitionibus and spell-bound. Mind you, she remained the same serpent to the end of her life, and God knows how long it lasted.
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TRACTATUS V - DE GIGANTIBUS - On Giants
You must know further that there are two more kinds that belong to the kind of nymphs and pygmies, namely, the giants and dwarfs, who are not born from Adam. Although it is a fact that Saint Christopher was a giant, yet he took birth from human seed, and hence we shall not write about him. But we shall write about the other giants, referred to in the stories of Bern, Sigenott, Hiltbrant, Dittrich, etc., also about the dwarf Laurin and others. Such stories are frequently rejected, but you must know that the same people who reject them, reject also much more important truth.
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To come to an end, know that such people, giants and dwarfs, may well make women from Adam pregnant, because same likes to meet same, and nature may permit it. Yet you must know that the monsters are not fertile, although they are monsters only so far as their strength and size is concerned; they are not misbuilt. But they have only one seed available, that is, they do not attain the third, fourth, etc. generation. Know also that when they get into man’s kind, the result is uncertain. If the child’s body takes after the mother it falls into her kind; if not, it becomes a beast like the father. It is not possible for it to become a mixed being because the seed of one of the two always prevails. It happens otherwise that both become one seed, but here not. And if it were one seed it would have to be qualified by the one partner who gives the soul. More is said about this subject in other philosophical treatises, and there is no need to tell it here. Their kind, however, has died out and they have left no descendants to replace them.
TRACTATUS VI - ON THE CAUSES OF SUCH CREATURES
Now that we must reflect in terms of natural philosophy about the causes of these creatures we must remember the facts, all the points, many of which have been discussed in the previous treatises. We need not repeat them here. Further causes that may be explored are these: namely, that God has set guardians over nature, for all things, and he left nothing unguarded.
Thus gnomes, pygmies and mami guard the treasures of the earth, the metals and similar treasures. Where they are, there are tremendous treasures, in tremendous quantities. They are guarded by such people, are kept hidden and secret so that they may not be found until the time for it has come. When they are found, people say: in times-of old there used to be mountain manikins, earth people here, but now they are gone. This means that now the time has come for the treasures to be revealed. The treasures of the earth are distributed in such a way that the metals, silver, gold, iron, etc., have been found from the beginning of the world on, and are being discovered by and by.
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[Now of] the fire people. They too are guardians, of the fireplaces, in which they live. In these places the treasures, that others guard, are forged, prepared, made ready. When the fire is extinguished, it is the earth manikins’ turn to be on guard. And after the earth manikins’ guard, the treasures are revealed. It is the same with the air people. They guard the rocks that lie on the surface, that have been made by the fire people, and put at the place where they belong, from where they get into man’s hands. They guard them so long, until the time has come. Wherever there are treasures, such people are on hand. These are hidden treasures that must not be revealed yet.
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The nymphs in the water are guardians of the great water treasures, that lie in the sea and other waters, that have also been melted and forged by the fire people. It is, therefore, commonly understood that where nymphs are, there are considerable treasures and minerals and similar matters which they guard. This is apparent in many ways.
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The cause of the sirens, giants, dwarfs, also of the will-o’the-wisps, who are monsters of the fire people, is that they predict and indicate something new. They are not on guard, but signify that misfortune is threatening people. ... when this is going to happen, signs occur. These beings are such signs, as has been said, but not they alone; there are many more. You must know that the signs change each time. They do not appear in one way, but are hidden to our eyes.
And, finally, the last cause is unknown to us. But when the end of the world will come close, then all things will be revealed, from the smallest to the largest, from the first to the last, what everything has been and is, why it stood there and left, from what causes, and what its meaning was. And everything that is in the world will be disclosed and come to light. Then the fake scholars will be exposed, those who are highly learned in name only but know nothing by experience. Then, the thorough scholars and those who are mere talkers will be recognized for what they are, those who wrote truthfully and those who traded in lies, the thorough and the shallow ones. And to each will be measured according to his diligence, earnest endeavor and truth. At that place, not everyone will be or remain a master, or even a doctor, because there the tares will be separated from the wheat and the straw from the grain. He who now cries, will be quieted, and he who now counts the pages, will have his quills taken away. And all things will be revealed before the Day of Judgment breaks, order that it be found of all scholars, from the past to that very day, who had knowledge and who not, whose writings were right and whose wrong. Now, in my time, this is still unknown. Blessed will be the people, in those days, whose intelligence will be revealed, for what they produced will be revealed to all the people as if it were written on their foreheads. For that time I also recommend my writings for judgment, asking that nothing be withheld. Thus it will be, for God makes the light manifest, that is, everyone will see how it has shone.

And I think I learned something.
Idk if this is ADHD or burnout but I have been just checked out lately. I actually love my job, but the past week or so it’s been like pulling teeth trying to focus at work. I’m a software developer, and I’m “junior” but still more senior than a few new devs on the team, and the nature of my workplace is that they are focused on teaching and mentoring the new devs and giving them experience on a wide range of topics, which means I’ve been stuck with a more limited set of chores and frustrating pipeline bullshit and it’s been starting to eat at me.
In addition, I’m out of the house 12 hours a day, and as soon as I get home I have 2 toddlers to care for, dinner and cleaning and then maybe an hour to spend with my husband before bed. Rinse and repeat. He works Saturdays so I’m with the kids all day then too. We get Sunday together. And I NEVER. GET. ONE. DAY. TO. MYSELF. I realized this in therapy the other week and she was like “you need a break” and I was like “I agree.”
I also keep paying the ADHD tax because I have a never ending amount of admin bullshit that I never have the time or energy to do (or remember to do) so it’s like oh yeah, I meant to cancel that subscription, I meant to dispute that charge, etc etc.
The plan was to put in for a day of leave, or just take advantage of the upcoming long weekend… well, apparently my brain and body took matters into their own hands. My kids kept me up last night and I didn’t get much sleep. I dropped them off at daycare this morning and then I got back in my car and instead of heading to work I just… didn’t. I told them I was taking the day off.
And then I went to get myself some gatorade and nail polish from the store. And then I found a bra shop and got myself fitted. And then I got myself some juice and breadsticks. And then I took a quick nap. And then I went to a bead shop. And then I went to Starbucks and got coffee and crafted for a bit.
And THEN. I pulled out my laptop and worked on a gift for a coworker I’d kept forgetting to do. And I took a deep breath and tackled the stressful email I’d been meaning to do to dispute some fees. And then I paid my credit cards and did my budget. ALL THE STRESSFUL THINGS. I actually had the energy and mental space to do them!!!!
I feel like my dopamine meter needed to recharge? Like I needed to do the fun relaxing stuff FIRST so that I could do the stressful stuff. And I never do that, I never have that. I also recently quit drinking so dopamine is an issue in general.
Does anyone else feel like they need to do fun stuff in order to have energy to do hard stuff? This is a revelation for me.
Too bad I can’t afford to just take a day off work every week lmao.
Anyway, now I’m going to go try to deposit some money and go to the post office and maybe get my glasses fixed (they’re loose and I’ve just been dealing with it) before I pick the kids up.
Wishing a recharged dopamine meter on all of you!!

A coworker linked me to this sub via a post about wolves and predation.
a particular comment has me baffled as to why someone could feel this way, and why people support it.
the comment, or part of it in question is
"How are we gonna convince those type of people that nature is cruel and we should help end wild animal suffering even if it means interference?"
How can we challenge the idea that nature is good, when the concept/idea of what good is is man made?
If i tried to imagine myself as any other organic living entity on this planet, in any scenario i can't see an outcome of wow, nature is bad.
I would like to think that nature is not good nor bad, that it just exists. And that events we are able to see/are aware of are only good or bad based on our opinions, and the opinions of others that we base ours on in most cases, as a lot of us don't live or experience said scenarios anymore.
As cruel as nature seems at times, nature is just as loving and kind 10 times over i feel. I also feel you really cannot control nature.
Quoting the above quote "we should help end wild animal suffering" If i am understanding this stance correctly, you want to kill predators humanely so they don't kill pray inhumanely, if only so nature isn't so cruel in the predatoprey dynamic. But, if a predator has the means to kill humanely, they are allowed to exist? If this is the case, how is this humane for the predators who have no choice but to survive by killing inhumanely?
Or, assuming that all predators kill inhumanely, be it a tiger who goes for the throat and kills quickly, vs a Komodo dragon who, let me tell you, is not an easy site to watch them eat, especially larger prey. How is that fair or humane to the Tiger?
The concept of helping end wild animal suffering by going out and killing the wild animals we deem as killing inhumanely in a humane way, seems inhumane to me?
Am i misunderstanding this concept?
At the end of the day, nature is natural, and it happened before us, and will continue after us. And that us getting involved to that level doesn't help nature, it only helps us with our feelings on how nature handles itself.
My personal stance is that nature is neither good nor bad, right or wrong. It just is, and we are apart of it. Because we are so far advanced in ages, that i think we have lost sight of how we came to be. Like, say, 10,000 years ago, when our early ancestors where hunting mammoths. I don't think there were any easy or clean ways to kill them. I can imagine is was brutal and terrifying and frightening for both the human and the mammoth.
Do our ancestors deserve to be euthanized humanely because they lacked the tools for a humane kill? Or is it now that we have advanced, and that the idea of being able control nature is real to some, that nature has evolved from bad but necessary to unnecessarily bad? Even than, as just another resident of nature, what gives us the right to try and control it?

Steel shod hooves clacked along the cobblestones, to the cheers of the common folk. The kights were ridding out.
You were with them. Not an actual knight, just a squire in service to them. But still you rode along to help with whatever menial tasks they needed. But you were one of the lucky ones, one that actually had a chance of becoming a knight someday.
"Someday" you think as you switch from cobbles to mud. Following behind the large party of horses, mud flinging up on your armor
The proud lords lead on, banners and ponytails flapping in the wind as you and the other squires follow in their wake. Drapped in their colors and heavy supply packs you all plod along in the muddy tracks from the horses
The lords crest the hill, pausing and many of them motioning for squires to bring binoculars forward. Your knight, the leader of the party and the order, does so as well. You scramble up to his side, he snatches them from your hands.
Sighing and pulling your own gifted spyglass out you look ahead, seeing a part of dark green armor clad figures on the hill in front of you. Banners waving in the wind, one of peace declaring their intentions
The knights turn to each other, debating what to do as the squires also discuss what to do with each other.
"Recon we'll go talk to em?" A green and black clad squire asks
"Nah, bet we'll charge straight into them. Could be some sort of trick" a red and yellow clad says while leaning on his sword
"What do you think? You've got the best training out of all of us" a squire calls to you "being the leaders chosen and all"
Pondering the question and measuring your response "I think we'll hear them out, doesn't seem like a trick so far" the other squires nodding in agreement
"I say we bloody well charge!" Comes from behind you. The red and yellow clad knight waving his Lance around as the rest of the knights squabble
Your knight watches them bicker. It's evident he's thinking hard on his flushed face "bet that's from the party last night" you recall grimly all the cleaning you still have to do after this excursion
Calling the other knights to order her gives his plan "let's go and talk to them, see what there up to". He wheels his horse around as the knights push forward and the squires struggle to keep up
Their delegation moves forwards. Seeing yours advance, making way to meet on top of the small hill between you
As you advance it becomes easier and easier to keep pace and eventually out pace the knights as the full scale of the warriors comes into play, most standing just shy of the knights on horseback and their leader
"God's above" you think seeing the armor clad woman standing taller then anyone in either group, easily a head taller over even your knight's raised saddle
The knights mill about on their horses, none wanting to approach the warriors, recognizing that they might for once not have the best equipment from the old vaults. Suddenly you feel a tapping on your back. You turn seeing your knight pull himself back into the saddle, his kick unbalancing him
"Go forth and talk to them in my stead" he orders, the other knights echoing his orders "sue for peace if they recognize our might, if not then wait for our charge"
Pushed ahead you drop your pack off and take hold of your weapons. A force sword and laser pistol, relics gratuitously given to you, setting forward the other squires follow
"Hail warriors" her voice is softer then you might think, Suddenly you remember your mother's stories of love at first sight "I take it your masters aren't coming" a hint of disappointment in her voice
"They aren't madam" you say with a half bow. "They sent us ahead to negotiate" you don't have to follow her eyes to see the knights nervously milling behind you, disapproval in her eyes
"I see" a measured response. "Then I'll say to you, I am El'Leonore Johnson, primarch of the Dark Angels Space marine legion, of the Imperium of Mankind. We have come to reclaim you into the fold of humanity" the speech comes with practiced ease, her voice delebretly loud enough to carry to the knights behind you.
Angry murmuring coming from the knights behind you. You sweat, seeing the armorments and knowing you stand no chance. And knowing the knights behind you not willing to give up their power. She looks at you, it seems she has some measure of what is going through your head, her voice comes soft enough for you to hear "you can seek safety with us squire" her voice sending shivers down your spine "we will protect you"
Yelling comes before you can deliver your answer. Yelling from the base of the hill you see a war party st the base of the Hill, Yelling their warcries they wait st the bottom of the hill. Turning to the squires you call out your orders "Wait here, I dont like that they revealed themselves st the base of the hill knowing we have horse" Another yell comes from the knights as they ready a charge
"Fools" comes from from woman behind you
You watch the awe inspiring charge of your knights. Trained for this purpose and relishing in the perfect conditions of the charge the thundering hooves and flashing of steel draws closer and closer
Only to go disastrously. Several horses flip, hit by unseen Spears and caltrops hidden in place. Some of the later knights wheel their horses in time to avoide the trap only to get cut down by the counter charge heading up to your position
"Into a square" you call seeing their numbers "form up into defensive we'll wear them out" squires galvanized into action by the shouted commands. Waiting for the charge to hit
Only for it to never land
Green blurs past you as the figures rush into combat, slaughtering the forces with roaring swords and screaming guns. She walks beside you "impressive are they not? My sons" she waves at the slaughter before you "just an honor guard, my legion is scattered among the stars"
As the figures figures come to a stop you see none of the ambushing party survived. Though a familiar figure did
Your knight storms his way up the hill, mud covering the bright colors of his armor and stuck in his long ponytail. He comes up directly to you and slaps you in the face "how dare you don't charge in to help us" spittle flying onto you "you left us alone going into that, how dare you..." his voice cuts off as his arm refuses to fly forward
She's standing behind him. A look of disgust on her face. "He was correct, it was an trap. Why would they give their position away at the bottom of the hill knowing you have the charge advantage?" Her quick tactical assessment seems to slap him across the face "and you seemed eager to send them in against a superior force but lead the charge against a weaker, it is undeserving of a leader"
He turns pulling his arm away from her "I am rightful lord by right" he blusters "and if you dont like it to bad. I will remain untill my death and you will never take us" he finishes dramatically turning away
Only for her sword to swing out and cut through his armor. He falls without a word, only his armor clanking to the ground, as she turns to you
"I trust that you would take over in succession" answered by your wordless nod "good" she takes his sword out of its sheath and offers it to you "then I give you his title and ask you to join us" taking the sword you look up at her sinking to one knee
The words you swore so long ago coming back to you "I do pledge my sword to you my lady, to carry your burden and assist you in your needs. On my honor do I swear this untill you see fit to grant me the honor of stand with you as an equal" the words ring out as you stand and move forward, freezing as muttering comes from the other squires
"Is their a problem?" She asks a confused look on her face. You rub the back of your head nervously. "Tradition states that the squire is to braid the hair of their knight upon swearing in" comes from the crowd. You turn with a blush looking for who called that out
"Ah, I see" she turns and sits on the ground, gesturing for one of her sons to bring something to stand on "I see no reason to disregard tradition then"
You nervously start braiding her hair, feeling the silky soft hair part and braid under your fingers. Dillagently following the steps you learned so long ago you soon have her hair in a long braid curing around her neck and running down her front. Steaping around her you take your new blade and hold the polished surface for her to glance upon. A faint smile touching her lips, seeming to grow as she notices your blush
"Then let us be off lord" she addresses you, rising to head back to the capitol "im certian they have a feast ready for them" she points at the armored lump in the grass
///// later that night /////
The feasting has long sense started, and will continue on till the morning. The squires finally happy to become knights of their own and the populace rejoicing, knowing your better then your former master.
You see a shuttle come fly down. And she heading towards it. Grabbing your back you rush down, just as the door is closing you call out "wait"
The ramp finishes closing, only to slowly unwind as she steps out expectantly "what seems to be the problem? You are lord of this land and advisors will come down tomorrow to set the world ready for Imperial tithes, yoy can relax and enjoy your position" she says crossing her arms
"I swore the oath of a squire" nerves creping into your voice "I can't lead, not until I can stand equal to my knight" you awkwardly point towards her as she realizes what had happened
She sighs as she pinches her nose. "I trust then you have someone to lead?" A nod confirms "good, then how long for you to pack?" You shrug your bag into view "very well, let us be off then" she turns waving you into the shuttle, showing you how to buckle in
As you take off you look over to your new knight. You notice her hair is still in the same braid you gave her earlier
Check out my other works here

There is a lot of fuzz going on right now on social media [this subreddit is a prime example] about who should be our starting gk on the upcoming Champions League's final: Lunin, the guy who did his best UPS delivery impression carrying us here, or the belgian goa...err, giraffe, Courtois. People, especially on the internet has narrow sight and short term memory [and this sub is a prime example, again]: Kepa should and will be our starting gk. And it makes perfect sense: first of all, he played through the toughest part of the season, as we all know, the start, when no one knows the rules of the game or which position are they supossed to play. He was there for us. Left London in a hurry and got used to a new culture pretty quickly, even learning a new language [spanish] to fit better with their new teammates. Second, people say "Lunin deseves to play the final", well, if we are talking merits, Kepa is again in the lead: not only he is leaving us this summer, but he has to come back to Chelsea. Thats a fate worse than Saudi league, lad deseves a propper farewell. For me, its obvious that Mr. Ancelotti is playing missdirection here, starting Tibauth and fueling the controversy online and in the media, creating a false "Courtoise vs Lunin" narrative so he can have the element of surprise in the final. Correct me if a wrong [even tho I know Im not] but this this the starting XI for Wembley's match: Kepa/Lucas Militao Vallejo Marcelo j Ceballos Valverde [he never rests] Pintus/ Güler Joselu Kane [a 1 match-type of loan]. I guess if everything goes as planned, Carletto can give some garbage time to that german guy, Crust or whatever. He made a couple of ok games here and there.

I have used Reddit for a long time but never interacted with anyone or any subreddit besides reading posts and comments, but after I met this subreddit by accident and started looking at some posts, I just had to write this post
I've always been the average cis straight male my entire life, but now I'm somehow confused about myself. I've seen a lot of content talking about sexuality, but I never felt it was about me. Even right now, after I've found this subreddit, I am still unsure if this term fits me.
Not sure if this is relevant, but I am 27 years old right now, and I'm married. My wife knows about what am I going through and she has been very supportive.
As I grew up with both mom and dad being extremely religious (Christian), I never doubted my sexuality. I never had any interest in LGBT speech (I was never against it, but it always felt like it was not for me)
During my childhood and adolescence, I've always liked female characters. I always played as a female character whenever I could. I remember spending hours and hours in MMO just creating the perfect female version of me, choosing the most beautiful clothes, and the perfect pink-dyed hairstyle. I always unconsciously felt attracted to the feminine body, clothes, etc. Not exactly in a sexual way, but I kinda wished to be like the characters I was creating
I also remember the first and almost the last time I tried wearing panties. I was around 5 or 6 years old, and I was in my room which I used to share my room with my older sister and I saw my sister's drawer half-opened. As I was a very curious kid, I gave a quick look and found out it was my sister's panties drawer. I don't remember why, but I just felt the need to try them, so I instantly removed my clothes. Unfortunately, before I finished putting them on, I was caught by my mother. Don't need to say I had one of the strongest spankings I ever had. During the next 15 years, I never came close to another panty again.
I always had some panties fetish. I Always found them pretty, and until recently, I always thought It was just a fetish. I don't remember exactly when it happened but, after I got married, I started wearing them casually. My wife even bought some pairs as a birthday gift.
Not only this, but I also started making and painting my nails. last time I painted them Pink with glitter, and it felt amazing. I also love to buy clothes. My wife hates shopping for clothes, and every time she has to, I need to go with her and choose for her. Usually, she hates doing girly stuff and prefers doing "male" things. She's even responsible for doing house maintenance (she likes it, and I don't).
I'm not sure if the "femboy" term fits me. I never felt like wearing skirts, dresses, or other girly clothes, mainly because they would not look good on me at all. I'm very tall and large and I don't think I have any feminine side in my appearance. Also, even if my wife doesn't mind me wearing lingerie, painting my nails, or even how we do in bed, I know she would not like me wearing these at all.
There were many times in the last couple of years that I caught myself thinking about how many things I could do, or how many things I could wear if I were a girl, but it's not like I don't accept myself how I am.
The point is, I identify myself as a man, but not as a male (does this make sense?).
I've been trying for some time to understand who I am. I don't like a man, but I also don't feel like I should be a woman. Most of the time, I feel uncomfortable when people tag me as a man, not because I am or not a man, but because they're forcing me into a group where most of the people are totally different from me, but the problem is even I don't know if there's a group I belong to.
After finishing writing this, I feel like I'm just making a storm in a teacup. I'm not sure if I was able to communicate exactly as I wanted either. Thank you if you read this far. This was something I kept in my chest for a long time and I couldn't talk to anyone besides my wife and my therapist.

Tom took another look at the dwindling encampment as his dismay began to fade away. "Whoever's left to hang out with are the most committed to the cause" he thought to himself. "If anything, I'll have more fun than I did before." And after all, they had a good lineup of activists scheduled to visit in the next few days, and an anarchist band had even agreed to play this afternoon. He had definitely noticed a rapid drop in the number of campers since the end of the semester, and had even begun to doubt that they would be able to get any sort of concessions out of the university. But his thinking had changed after hearing the speeches that morning.
First to speak was Tom's friend and comrade, Eric. His impassioned indictment of the Israeli government reminded Tom of the importance of their activism. Then came the married grad students, the Trotskyist Abdou and the pan-Arabist Farida. They were international students studying English and anthropology, respectively. Or was it anthropology and sociology? Abdou lectured on the university's connection to the military-industrial complex. His speech was filled with threats to the administration that Tom was sure the limp-dicked Trot had no means of fulfilling. Even so, he had to admit that despite all his other inadequacies, Abdou was a powerful speaker. Finally came Farida. Tom had always considered her the best speaker of them all, but frankly he had a hard time taking his eyes off her whether she was speaking or not. He had tried flirting with her before, and he got the feeling that Abdou was even more into it than she was. Thinking about it now, he couldn't quite remember what her speech had been about, but it had certainly improved his spirits.
As the "Bacon Brigade" began setting up their instruments, Tom decided to make a point of dancing with Farida that afternoon. As the average tent now held two campers rather than five, he even thought he might get a chance to enjoy some of the newfound privacy.
...
When there was a break in the music, Tom sauntered over to the table where Abdou was sitting. As an ML, Tom could hardly stand Trotskyists, but he put on a smile for the sake of "left unity."
"She's a good dancer isn't she?" said Abdou.
"Oh yes, the best," agreed Tom. He was trying to think of a way of progressing his slow seduction of this Muslim woman and decided to be bold. "Look Abdou, the band will be winding down soon, why don't you both come back to my tent and I'll show you some comradely hospitality. I also have some suggestions that I know you'll love."
Abdou's mind was racing with the possibilities of the situation. Would this be the chance to see his wife seduced and taken by this big stud? Supposing Farida won't agree? Before he could engage his brain Abdou found himself agreeing to Tom's offer. "Wonderful, wonderful," beamed Tom and he could feel his big cock twitch at the thought of bedding Abdou's beautiful wife.
Just then Farida reappeared. "What are you two talking about?" she said.
Before Abdou could say a word, Tom said "Well my dear, your husband has kindly accepted my invitation of hospitality at my tent."
Farida didn't know what to say. She had thought Abdou would whisk her off back to the hotel and give her the fucking she desperately needed. Rubbing up against Tom's manhood had taken its toll. "Well I suppose we could come and see where you camp," she said, "but we mustn't stay too late must we Abdou?"
"What? I err no, I suppose not," stammered Abdou as Tom rose and offered Farida his arm.
And the three of them found themselves heading off to tent where the lives of Abdou and Farida would be changed forever. As they walked along Abdou held one of Farida's arms and Tom the other. However, after a while Abdou consciously let go of his wife's arm and stepped behind Tom.
This was not lost on the big white and he put his big protective arm around Abdou's wife as if to say to everyone "she's mine." If Farida hadn't been so dazed by the afternoon's events, she might have noticed various other white students smiling at Tom with knowing grins. They had recognized the situation immediately; a Muslim couple with cuckold husband following on as a big powerful white man led the wife to his cot.
Soon they reached Tom's tent and both Abdou and Farida were pleasantly surprised at how spacious it was. "Let me get you some coffee," said Tom as both Abdou and Farida collapsed onto a big sleeping bag.
Having sorted the drinks, Tom put some music on, and crawling over to Farida he said, "Can we have another dance Farida, you're such a good dancer?"
Before Farida could answer she felt her husband pushing her up. "Go on Farida, you know how much you enjoy it."
Abdou secretly wanted to see his wife in the arms of this Adonis again and who knows maybe more. Having no real reason to object, Farida agreed and as she accepted Toms hand she couldn't help but feel a shiver at the thought of being reacquainted with his penis, albeit covered by his trousers. However, as they left the tent she had a suspicion that he wasn't wearing any under garments since his penis had seemed so clearly outlined earlier.
As he clasped her to himself Tom could feel his big cock twitch once again. He moved one hand down to the small of her back, just to test the waters and meeting no resistance after another minute or so he moved his hand onto her sexy bottom. He could feel through the thin dress that Farida wasn't wearing thick pants, or perhaps only very skimpy ones and he couldn't wait to see her naked.
Farida felt lost in a different world as she circled round with this big man. Not only could she feel his penis growing hard against her once more, but she felt his big hand on her bottom pulling her onto his hardness. When she looked at her husband (still sitting in the tent), she noticed that he was just rubbing his own penis through his trousers. "My goodness," she thought, "he's getting turned on watching us. Supposing I flirt a bit more and show him what he's missing?"
With that Farida deliberately started to open her legs and let Tom's muscular leg rub against her inflamed sex.
This change in Farida's demeanor was not lost on Tom. As he led her back to the tent, he let his hands roam all over the back of this sexy hijabi Muslim wife and he leaned down to kiss and nibble her neck and ears. He heard Farida sigh and knew that he was close to capturing this sexy wife. "Fatima, let's give Abdou a show to remember shall we?"
Farida was brought back from her dreamlike state by Tom's question. "What do you mean?" she asked.
Almost in a whisper Tom said, "You know, a bit of thesis-antithesis-synthesis."
He had already found the zipper that ran down the back of Farida's dress and he had it in his hands as he spoke to her. He slowly started to pull the zipper down and it was half way down her back before Farida realised what was happening. "Wait Tom, we can't do this, I'm married."
"So what of it, Abdou wants me to undress you, don't you Abdou?"
Abdou had no hesitation in replying in the affirmative. This is what he had wanted for so long.
Caught in the confusion and surprise of hearing her husband say that he wanted to see another man, undress her, Farida just lay there while Tom pulled the zipper right down and then eased the dress off her shoulders. Suddenly she realised that she was lying in only her stockings, garter belt, and thong panties.
As she looked up at Tom she saw something that she hadn't seen in a man for years and that was undisguised lust. This man was lusting after her, this married women! She should have felt ashamed at her feelings but she didn't. Having got half-naked, she realised that she was enjoying the attention of this muscular white man. In fact she decided to crawl around in front of him as if to say 'look at what my husband has and you haven't'.
This might have been a foolish act, but it merely served to confirm what both men knew. For Tom it confirmed that Farida was absolutely gorgeous, the sexiest Muslim woman he had ever seen and that she needed to be loved sexually. For Abdou as he fingered his painfully erect cock, he knew that he was just a few steps away from pushing his wife into a sleeping bag with another man. He was close to realizing his fantasy.
Tom pulled Farida to him, lifted her face to his and he kissed her. Farida would always remember that first kiss since it was both passionate but more significantly the precursor to her crossing a line that could not be re- crossed, and to setting in motion events that would last her and her husband a lifetime. She accepted his big tongue into her mouth and her tongue fenced with his. She could feel his big hands roaming all over body now.
In her trance-like state it seemed quite natural that Tom should start to remove his clothing. Both Farida and Abdou watched as the big man removed his shirt to reveal a hugely-muscled chest and then he dropped his trousers and just as Farida had suspected he wore no underwear. His big cock reared up in all is magnificence and Tom was gratified to hear both husband and wife express surprise at his size.
Tom crawled over to the sleeping bag where Farida was sitting and crouched in front of her, his big cock semi erect. He remembered that Eric had told him that the cops were closing in, and he knew he would have to move quickly if he wanted to finish before they cleared the encampment. Farida's head was at the same level as the big man's groin and she was amazed at the whole size and muscularity of this man. Her trance-like state was broken by Tom who said softly "Take my cock into your mouth."
Farida was aghast, "I can't! It's dirty and I've never done that before."
Tom laughed to himself. This wife was indeed naive and yet he was gratified that he would be the first man to have his cock sucked by her. Lifting her face so that she could look into his eyes, Tom said, "As we hear from German ideologists, Germany has in the last few years gone through an unparalleled revolution. The decomposition of the Hegelian philosophy, which began with Strauss, has developed into a universal ferment into which all the “powers of the past” are swept. In the general chaos mighty empires have arisen only to meet with immediate doom, heroes have emerged momentarily only to be hurled back into obscurity by bolder and stronger rivals. It was a revolution beside which the French Revolution was child’s play, a world struggle beside which the struggles of the Diadochi [successors of Alexander the Great] appear insignificant. Principles ousted one another, heroes of the mind overthrew each other with unheard-of rapidity, and in the three years 1842-45 more of the past was swept away in Germany than at other times in three centuries.
"All this is supposed to have taken place in the realm of pure thought.
"Certainly it is an interesting event we are dealing with: the putrescence of the absolute spirit. When the last spark of its life had failed, the various components of this caput mortuum began to decompose, entered into new combinations and formed new substances. The industrialists of philosophy, who till then had lived on the exploitation of the absolute spirit, now seized upon the new combinations. Each with all possible zeal set about retailing his apportioned share. This naturally gave rise to competition, which, to start with, was carried on in moderately staid bourgeois fashion. Later when the German market was glutted, and the commodity in spite of all efforts found no response in the world market, the business was spoiled in the usual German manner by fabricated and fictitious production, deterioration in quality, adulteration of the raw materials, falsification of labels, fictitious purchases, bill-jobbing and a credit system devoid of any real basis. The competition turned into a bitter struggle, which is now being extolled and interpreted to us as a revolution of world significance, the begetter of the most prodigious results and achievements.
"If we wish to rate at its true value this philosophic charlatanry, which awakens even in the breast of the honest German citizen a glow of national pride, if we wish to bring out clearly the pettiness, the parochial narrowness of this whole Young-Hegelian movement and in particular the tragicomic contrast between the illusions of these heroes about their achievements and the actual achievements themselves, we must look at the whole spectacle from a standpoint beyond the frontiers of Germany.
"Ideology in General, German Ideology in Particular: German criticism has, right up to its latest efforts, never quitted the realm of philosophy. Far from examining its general philosophic premises, the whole body of its inquiries has actually sprung from the soil of a definite philosophical system, that of Hegel. Not only in their answers but in their very questions there was a mystification. This dependence on Hegel is the reason why not one of these modern critics has even attempted a comprehensive criticism of the Hegelian system, however much each professes to have advanced beyond Hegel. Their polemics against Hegel and against one another are confined to this – each extracts one side of the Hegelian system and turns this against the whole system as well as against the sides extracted by the others. To begin with they extracted pure unfalsified Hegelian categories such as “substance” and “self-consciousness,” later they desecrated these categories with more secular names such as species “the Unique,” “Man,” etc.
"The entire body of German philosophical criticism from Strauss to Stirner is confined to criticism of religious conceptions. [The following passage is crossed out in the manuscript:] claiming to be the absolute redeemer of the world from all evil. Religion was continually regarded and treated as the arch-enemy, as the ultimate cause of all relations repugnant to these philosophers. The critics started from real religion and actual theology. What religious consciousness and a religious conception really meant was determined variously as they went along. Their advance consisted in subsuming the allegedly dominant metaphysical, political, juridical, moral and other conceptions under the class of religious or theological conceptions; and similarly in pronouncing political, juridical, moral consciousness as religious or theological, and the political, juridical, moral man – “man” in the last resort – as religious. The dominance of religion was taken for granted. Gradually every dominant relationship was pronounced a religious relationship and transformed into a cult, a cult of law, a cult of the State, etc. On all sides it was only a question of dogmas and belief in dogmas. The world was sanctified to an ever-increasing extent till at last our venerable Saint Max was able to canonise it en bloc and thus dispose of it once for all.
"The Old Hegelians had comprehended everything as soon as it was reduced to an Hegelian logical category. The Young Hegelians criticised everything by attributing to it religious conceptions or by pronouncing it a theological matter. The Young Hegelians are in agreement with the Old Hegelians in their belief in the rule of religion, of concepts, of a universal principle in the existing world. Only, the one party attacks this dominion as usurpation, while the other extols it as legitimate.
"Since the Young Hegelians consider conceptions, thoughts, ideas, in fact all the products of consciousness, to which they attribute an independent existence, as the real chains of men (just as the Old Hegelians declared them the true bonds of human society) it is evident that the Young Hegelians have to fight only against these illusions of consciousness. Since, according to their fantasy, the relationships of men, all their doings, their chains and their limitations are products of their consciousness, the Young Hegelians logically put to men the moral postulate of exchanging their present consciousness for human, critical or egoistic consciousness, and thus of removing their limitations. This demand to change consciousness amounts to a demand to interpret reality in another way, i.e. to recognise it by means of another interpretation. The Young-Hegelian ideologists, in spite of their allegedly “world-shattering" statements, are the staunchest conservatives. The most recent of them have found the correct expression for their activity when they declare they are only fighting against “phrases.” They forget, however, that to these phrases they themselves are only opposing other phrases, and that they are in no way combating the real existing world when they are merely combating the phrases of this world. The only results which this philosophic criticism could achieve were a few (and at that thoroughly one-sided) elucidations of Christianity from the point of view of religious history; all the rest of their assertions are only further embellishments of their claim to have furnished, in these unimportant elucidations, discoveries of universal importance.
"It has not occurred to any one of these philosophers to inquire into the connection of German philosophy with German reality, the relation of their criticism to their own material surroundings.
"First Premises of Materialist Method: The premises from which we begin are not arbitrary ones, not dogmas, but real premises from which abstraction can only be made in the imagination. They are the real individuals, their activity and the material conditions under which they live, both those which they find already existing and those produced by their activity. These premises can thus be verified in a purely empirical way.
"The first premise of all human history is, of course, the existence of living human individuals. Thus the first fact to be established is the physical organisation of these individuals and their consequent relation to the rest of nature. Of course, we cannot here go either into the actual physical nature of man, or into the natural conditions in which man finds himself – geological, hydrographical, climatic and so on. The writing of history must always set out from these natural bases and their modification in the course of history through the action of men.
"Men can be distinguished from animals by consciousness, by religion or anything else you like. They themselves begin to distinguish themselves from animals as soon as they begin to produce their means of subsistence, a step which is conditioned by their physical organisation. By producing their means of subsistence men are indirectly producing their actual material life.
"The way in which men produce their means of subsistence depends first of all on the nature of the actual means of subsistence they find in existence and have to reproduce. This mode of production must not be considered simply as being the production of the physical existence of the individuals. Rather it is a definite form of activity of these individuals, a definite form of expressing their life, a definite mode of life on their part. As individuals express their life, so they are. What they are, therefore, coincides with their production, both with what they produce and with how they produce. The nature of individuals thus depends on the material conditions determining their production.
"This production only makes its appearance with the increase of population. In its turn this presupposes the intercourse [Verkehr] of individuals with one another. The form of this intercourse is again determined by production.
[continues in comment]

I'm looking for more input to help me decide what to do about my job situation.
Some not so quick backstory on my narc:
I took an Executive Assistant position with a six-person company (with no HR department) just over a year ago. Shortly after I started, my boss went through a divorce, which significantly changed his behavior. Initially, the job was great, with hybrid and work-from-home options. However, as the divorce progressed, he began making inappropriate comments and exhibited troubling behavior.
He kept insisting that I hook him up with some of my friends. This is after telling me he was not looking for anything serious, so he was really asking for me to find someone he could have sex with. When I told him that was not part of my job description he just laughed and said I was also his personal assistant and I have to do anything he asks. He would often come into the office sick and would end up getting me sick. When I asked if he could cough into his shoulder instead of coughing openly all over the office (sometimes in my face like a child) he made a comment to the 27 year old he was seeing at the time that he and I made out with him and that's why he was sick. He came into my office laughing about how upset his 27 year old girlfriend was that he was making jokes about making out with his assistant. I told him "you can't say things like that to me or her" he laughed and walked away. I spent the next two hours crying on the phone to my coworker (who happens to be related to him and in no position of power any more because she's close to his ex wife so she cannot help me) and she insisted he wasn't like that. I couldn't tell anyone but my partner because I felt so ashamed. I went back into the office after crying and his first words to me were "wow you look like shit" I explained to him that I had been crying because his inappropriate comments made me feel like I am not professional and instead just a joke to him. He apologized and said he couldn't afford a defamation suit right now with the divorce and sent me home for the day.
This is only a few weeks into having this job so I am panicked thinking I am stuck at this point because who's going to hire someone that's only been at a company for a few weeks? How is that going to look on my resume.
As time went on I feel like I really dove in and made the job my own. I'm basically everything to the company with HR, IT, Accounting etc. as some of us EA's end up being for small companies. I am also taking over duties for his relative who is pregnant and she basically runs the company for him so I am truly the end all be all for all operations of the company.
While the inappropriate comments stopped (I think it was because he finally got a long term gf) other things started coming up. I took a long weekend vacation in August, October, December and February and on each of those vacations he ended up texting me that he didn't feel supported by me and that I needed to focus on streamlining things for him and he's not getting that enough from me. The October, December, February vacations I spent the first day crying because of these texts. Both times I came back from vacation and wrote emails asking how I can do better but both times I was written off and told "I don't want to talk about that right now." I asked him "can you please not text me criticisms while I am on vacation and instead have a sit down conversation with me face to face so that we might tackle these issues" he would say yes then of course it would never happen and this behavior continues.
More recently he has been getting a bit more emotionally abusive I guess? I have to text him reminders (which I have now stopped because of this conversation) every hour, half hour, 15 minutes and 5 minutes before each meeting. He was upset because a meeting got moved and I didn't adjust my notifications and he ended up being a half hour early to a meeting. He was very irate and has called me unreliable multiple times and has asked me to stop sending these notifications because my JD clearly states that I need to set up these notifications through technology (my mistake for trying to defend myself). I reminded him that my JD and operating manual that the old EA made states that I need to also text him these reminders, I had already had the notifications set up on his phone and asked if he was not seeing them. His response was "I'm saying the lack of self awareness with how you communicate to me is getting tiring. Your job is not on the line here but as you can see are going to keep moving forward and keep making improvements." I think he is projecting the self awareness but I just don't find this kind of feedback respectful or helpful.
He started off my annual review by telling me that I would not be getting my bonus as "freely" as I did last year and he's going to put a lot of stipulations in place to make sure I don't get it without a lot more work (that was feb and it's now almost june and these stipulations have still not been stated..). He said that he needs to spend more money on marketing and he's overpaying people so he will not give me a raise this year. He also went on to talk about how I have a bad attitude and how I've been frustrated with the new office. My commute tripled with this move and this office is a coworking space that does not give us the proper tools to operate our company - his gf helped him pick it out without knowing how we operate and it's only continued to hinder and cost us money so yes, I am frustrated and feel way out of my depth with zero support. On top of the fact that he makes snide comments that he doesn't believe I can't do xyz because the office wifi doesn't support it. He just recently hired another relative to take over the IT duties for the new office because I've been struggling and even she is running into the same problems I am seeing. (obviously he only hires relatives because those are the only people that put up with his bs longterm)
In conclusion, I am terrified of working the two weeks if I give notice given his penchant for hurting me. I am also terrified of giving same day notice but would be far more relieved if I block him on everything. However, he's the kind of vindictive person that would stalk me to find out where I've gone next to call them and let them know I did not give two weeks and actually quit the same day. I am also paranoid that he would try to sue me for leaving because I run EVERYthing in this company right now. I feel so beat down that I don't even feel like I have the energy to be a good EA right now. I know that's the point with all this gaslighting and demeaning behavior so I just need some help. I am trying not to end up with being sent into a grippy sock vacation but my mental health is definitely veering that way at this point.
(good news is I am on my fourth job and fifth job interview with another company this week)

I’ve been doing a lot of research on autism lately (shocker I know /s). I had been suspecting that I had it for years now; ever since my best friend told me about her diagnosis. After carefully considering and reconsidering the signs, taking multiple (and I mean multiple) informal tests and questionnaires, and even speaking with my therapist about it, I’ve all but formally confirmed that I am autistic. Even as I write this, I notice it as I keep having to go back rewriting and rewriting to make sure I get my language and grammar exactly correct because I have a very hard time putting my thoughts into words. Despite all this, I still can’t help but doubt myself; I often wonder if it’s really just all in my head. The reason is because I feel like it can be very inconsistent sometimes.
Example time! I’ve been working as a cake decorator in a small bakery for the past three years. I love baking, pastry arts, and decorating cakes in general and I started out this job absolutely loving every second of it. The kitchen can get pretty noisy at times with the ovens and freezer whirring, baking trays clanking, the mixers running, and my coworkers and I often enjoying music from our speaker as we work. Usually this isn’t much of a problem for me. I’ve had my days where the noise can bother me a little, but I’m usually able to shake it off. Recently, however, I’ve been having a much harder time with it. Today was the worst it’s ever been. All of the noises I listed before, things that usually don’t bother me much, REALLY bothered me today. I wanted so badly to scream and cry for someone to turn the music or the ovens off. But I couldn’t, I had to finish my job as quickly as I could so that I could go scream in my car. This had me so confused. I honestly don’t really know exactly why it bothered me so much today. It made me realize that there are definitely inconsistencies in my sensory issues sometimes. Could all of this just be in my head? I’m having serious doubts here.

MAIN CLAIM: The entire concept of racism is irrelevant, and discussing it from whichever standpoint will lead to nothing.
REASONS:

1. Beliefs ≠ Actions — An individual has the right to make any sort of conclusions towards anything, since we're all equal, no one can claim moral superiority or enlightenment. With that said, actions that can result from racist beliefs are NOT unethical BECAUSE of racism but INDEPENDENTLY from it. EX: Murder (It's not racism that makes murder unethical), insults (it's not racism that makes offensive speech unethical), discrimination (It's not racism that makes treating another as inferior that makes that act itself unethical).
   
2. The notion of racism necessarily implies the existence of race — When anti-racist people speak out against racism, they do so refuting the core notion that "there are no superior races", this will lead to no results since it leads to it being a matter of difference of information and experience (Racists have, in their heads, good and tangible reasons to be racists that can be pointed out). HOWEVER, the rebuttal of this core notion has a VALIDATING effect for racists because it makes their main assumption that race exists LEGITIMATE. Since it's not that assumption that is being tackled the racist will comfortably believe that if the anti-racist had been through similar experiences they'd understand why a certain race is inferior. Meanwhile, if the concept of race was refuted as a whole, there'd be no space for those conclusions. One thing to be considered is that the existence of the race DOES necessarily imply superior and inferior (EX: if there are races, then there are groups that are genetically different, which means that they will necessarily have different IQs, one higher, one lower), at most it can be argued that this superiority and inferiority is context-dependant, but this does not matter for the racist who WILL use the info in those exact contexts.
   
3. Anti-racism oftentimes further propagates racism — A quick example is enough. When new movies, or other forms of media, come out featuring black individuals in prominent roles, many ardent anti-racists start dissecting the traits and plot points attributed to these black characters, to make sure there is no racism. This has a dehumanizing effect since it necessarily implies that are certain actions/behaviors/plot points that can ONLY happen to blacks if a racist screenwriter decides so. With anti-racism, the focus is constantly on race, taking the individual out of the equation and judging him solely through a racial viewpoint. I was watching a video by Metatron where he reacts to a video by an historian analysing a scene from the movie 300, the historian states that it is ableist for a deformed character to be represented as deceitful and a traitor. This is not about race but is a similar enough theme. What happens here is that the experience of the deformed character is completely dismissed (they have reasons to be deceitful) and its free-will completely ignored because the focus is on its appearance and body by the very people who criticise it. It's also implying that deformed people cannot be traitors. Why wouldn't they? If we're all the same?
   
4. It has an ostracising effect — Very often people forget that racists have REASONS to be racist. If they have had a disproportionate amount of bad experiences with people of a certain race, it's NATURAL to adapt to this experience with misguided conclusions. The same way that, on a larger scale, women can develop a generalised fear of men due to sexual harassment. When morality is brought to the topic, it further separates and alienates racists by DISMISSING THEIR EXPERIENCE. This is wrong because it's demanding that people be more rational than they are capable of on their own and invalidating their fears and natural adaptations, and all of this because people either seek the moral highground, want to virtue signal, or are lazy in actually tackling racist issues. No conflict will EVER be solved by further alienating someone by attributing to them immoral qualities. No one is born immoral, everyone is malleable. But treating them as monsters most certainly ensures they'll remain monsters. It is extremely counter-productive to alienate racists, as if one could solve problems of discrimination by preaching to those that are already converted. Needless to say, any actions need to be punished or rewarded accordingly, regardless of the person behind them.
   
5. It doesn't tackle the core issues — It happens INSANELY often that people reject actual facts about reality in order to avoid racism and bigotry. Using as an example the 13/50 statistic. This statistic IS real. People immediately want to hide or quickly "disprove" it away because of its danger, but again, this is counter-productive and lazy. If a racist sees this statistical fact, and sees that anti-racists delusionally reject it, his view WILL BE LEGITIMISED. Applying a moral layer to a matter of INFORMATION is a terrible, terrible idea. No one is immoral for trying to understand a statistic, but if they are treated as such, they will be such.
   

MY PROPOSED ALTERNATIVES:

1. The experience of racists should be openly validated, tackled and EXPLAINED. Carefully demonstrating what the 13/50 means for racists has, potentially, very positive effects. Not only could such an explanation, if done effectively, be enough to stop it from being used for racists conclusions, it could have the complete opposite effect and make racists more aware of the experience of blacks from the perspective of economical and societal issues (of which human GREED is the main source). This should be done WITHOUT any morality involved. It takes work, strength, courage, knowledge and reasoning, so of course it is harder than merely preaching, but it is the only thing that can work. It requires open-minded, detached and precise counter-arguments for the exact things racists say, instead of generalised moralistic statements or attempts and censoring.
2. There should be a wider spread of GENUINE black role models and positive actions, as well as history. This has, in my opinion, never be started and has had a counter-productive effect since what media has done is take away stories from caucasians, for example, and trade those with blacks, as well as constantly trying to force formulaic and generic examples of black strength that have no effect because they aren't true (EX: Wakanda). Whites have little access to true and inspiring stories from other cultures. A movie like "the boy who harnessed the wind", for example, which tells a real and authentic story about an african family, has 10000x more power than the modern "ACCEPT THAT OTHER RACES ARE GOOD AND YOU'RE A DEMONIC WHITE" media.
3. Make an actual effort to finally NOT SEE COLOR, which used to be the main goal. Even if others do see color, if you try to tackle it from their perspective, you won't win. Offer a different perspective, an alternative worldview, and don't challenge theirs. No one is special.

For context, I work in social media marketing. I have my own clients, but I also work as a freelancer with a larger agency. Late last year, they took on a local chain of clothing stores as a client, and I agreed to being the main social media coordinator, but other team members would do other aspects. The price had seemed very good at the time.
The store has proved to be very difficult to work with - they expect us to work all hours, including nights and weekends. They're not organised, and always send last minute requests or assets to post. The assets are often full of mistakes (typos which I point out to them, but also wrong images and prices etc that I wouldn't have info on) so while they rush me to post them ASAP, they then call after to delete them and replace as they have mistakes. This of course wastes my time. We also do content creation for them, and it takes days or weeks for them to approve work, due to their hierarchy with many supervisors to go through. The holiday season was a nightmare - they were calling me about every 30 mins and sending emails throughout the day and night!
The biggest headache of all is the store's main point of contact - she has a VERY abrasive personality, and it seems as though she enjoys being difficult and condescending. She nitpicks at everything we produce, constantly moves goalposts, gets into snappy moods, and it honestly seems as though we're pandering more to her personal preferences than what perform bests on social media. She's also very sarcastic in her speech, saying things like "It shouldn't be this hard for you to understand, you seem intelligent". There was a time where I pushed back on a video that I edited for them and she clearly didn't like it and became even more unpleasant for weeks, including ignoring my calls and messages and pointing out if I hadn't replied to messages and comments quickly enough on the stores' pages. Most of the time with the messages/comments, I was waiting on the store to provide the info to then share with the person asking. She complains that we don't do things fast enough, but then takes ages to send over information. It feels as though you just can't win.
I've brought up with the agency how difficult they are to work with, and while they agree, they've not tried to address it, or ask how we can make the process easier for all involved. I know that the store is one of the agency's biggest clients, and that I'd only be getting a fraction of what they're charging, so the agency owner is probably just overlooking it for the money. Some of the other team members have told me that she often doesn't enforce boundaries with other clients or listen to their complaints, and she personally works almost 24/7, so this may be just how she operates.
This month, I decided that I had enough, and I told the agency owner that I'm not continuing with this client, and that I'll finish over the next few weeks. She said she understood, but she then made it seem as though the problem is that I have too many responsibilities to be able to provide the support needed, and not that the client is just too much. I thought it best not to argue with her, because she's always makes comments about how I'm too "sensitive" or "defensive", especially when I'm trying to address a client issue with her. Both she and the store contact woman are older than me, and it seems like they both dismiss me because of the age difference, which feels disrespectful.
So I'm just riding out the next few weeks, but unfortunately it seems as though the store contact has decided to make them as difficult as possible. She's been ultra picky and vocal about everything this past week, and with summer sales and events coming up, I know it'll get worse.
I'm basically asking for help or advice on how to not let these next few weeks get to me. I know that the end is coming up, but it feels almost unbearable to have to keep dealing with them - I'm sorry I didn't choose a closer end date.
I'm also wondering if I should ask for an "exit interview" of sorts with the agency on why it didn't work out with this client. I spoke with my friend who works in HR about this and she said it seems like a waste of time, especially if the agency owner has me painted in a certain way in her head. She said to just leave it for the next agency member to see how difficult the client is, and that maybe if the agency owner is honest, she'll see that the client is the problem.
Would love some advice on how to not get too frustrated over these next few weeks. Thanks!

Well this story happened during my time working at Home Depot about 2 or 3 years ago and not the first time I've had people make racist remarks towards me.
I've been at work for a while and don't remember if I had just started my shift or was ending, I just remember standing at my register and than my coworker I'll call Brooklyn gently tap me on the shoulder asking "Hey my customers don't speak much English can you see if you can help me out?" Luckily the elderly couple were speaking Hmong while waiting for us to come over and I agreed to take over the transaction for Brooklyn and she'd watch over my register until I finished, cause I've grown comfortable acting as a translater for elderly Hmong customers or anyone who rather speak our native language instead of English.
So not long after I finish their transaction and start heading back to my register, I hear a very entitled throat clearing followed by "UM EXCUSE ME" along with finger snapping from behind me, Brooklyn and I see Karen standing at her register with a smug "well I'm waiting for my stuff to be rung up." Brooklyn quickly goes over and Karen says "YEAH WHY ISNT SHE COMING BACK TO RING ME UP?!
Brooklyn: she was helping the previous customers cause they have a language barrier, this is exactly my register.
Karen: that's not an excuse to ignore me like that, I'm a customer too, does she have something against American people?
Me from my register: no I was only asked to finish her transaction for the customer, I came back cause that's all I was asked to do.
Also Karen didn't walk up until after I walked away or else I would've turned around to ring her up, by the time we notice Karen Brooklyn was a few steps away and hence why she quickly went over to ring Karen up, Karen not happy with my answer started grumbling something under her breathe so I didn't exactly hear what she was saying until she said loudly "YOUR KIND IS THE REASON WE BOMBED JAPAN!!"
Me and Brooklyn stopped what we were doing and stared at Karen baffled by what she just said, Karen smirks and asks me "what it's true, Japanese people attacked us first." I'm starting to get mad, but not because of that fact, but due to Karen assuming I'm Japanese cause I was asain and implying that I was a racist.
Me: I wasn't even born when that happened, don't blame what happened in the past on me, I'm just doing what my coworker asked of me and I didn't ignore you. You walked up when I already walked away.
Karen: OHHHH scary Japanese girl is telling me what to do and claiming her kind isn't at fault for Pearl Harbor.
I saw red and said firmly "I'M HMONG NOT JAPANESE, LEARN YOUR ASAIN RACES," Karen shocked that I stood up to her "Hmong isn't a race, you clearly made that up." Suddenly Sally our supervisohead cashier whom overheard what was said as she was walking over "HEY HEY BREAK IT UP."
Karen: you need to teach that racist Japanese employee of yours to be respectful or I'll report both of you to corporate.
Brooklyn: she wasn't even being disrespectful, she was just correcting you abou-
Karen: oh now your ganging up on me, your an American too why are you siding with that Japanese
Sally: LEAVE I'm not going to stand you harassing my cashiers.
Karen: but but why are you
Sally: Dragon_Crystal was asked by her fellow coworker to assist them and that's what she did, than you come over demanding she ring up your stuff rudely and than make racist insults towards asains. I'm not going to let that happen leave now.
Karen leaves her cart and storms towards the door saying "I'll be reporting this to HR, you'll be jobless by tomorrow you Japanese immigrant." I yell back to her "I'M AM AMERICAN BORN HMONG CITIZEN AND RAISED HERE STUPID," which made Karen give me a surprised Pikachu face as she disappeared outside, I honestly thought I was going to get a write up for calling a customer stupid since I'm normally a calm collected person. Only to be followed with Sally doubled over laughing cause she wasn't expecting me to slip in that last part, I was allowed to go on break to cool off after dealing with Karen. That was lucky the only time I saw Karen, I'm sure she was banned.
Tl;dr Karen blames the cause of WW2 on me, gets told to leave and tries to get the last word in, only to be shocked

-Disclaimer: This is an examination of Dottore being a complex morally grey villain that wasn't just born 100% evil, it's NOT a case that he's a good boy.-
I'll assume Zandik is Dottore since it's very likely (plus, someone tried to name their Wanderer that but it didn't work.)
Let's start with the oldest piece of lore:
-- Doctor's Pinion reveals a tragic past with unknown reasons for persecution --
When Pierro first tried to recruit Zandik / Dottore, he responded:

"Will you treat me like the Akademiya did? Will you call me a monster, a madman?" "Or will you treat me as my hometown did, and chase me away with pitchforks and clubs...?"

Some people assume the persecution was because of his experiments but it's important to note that the fact is we don't know what happened so there's a chance it wasn't something evil. That he could be chased away by "pitchforks and clubs" indicates he was weak at that point and couldn't do anything to stop it.
He also expresses a desire to merge humans with machines.

"With or without a Vision, and irrespective of their physique or combat skills,"Enhanced humans" would surely display strength far beyond the average."

This shows a desire to give power to the weak (likely including himself), even if they lack visions. Which isn't inherently a bad thing, it's just against the Akademiya's teachings. This applies even to Scaramouche, whose power had been locked by Raiden and he unlocked it.
-- Mysterious moral convictions --
Although a lot of the fandom accuses him of having no ethics or morals at all, there are several hints that this isn't the case.
He got mad at Scaramouche when told: "you only care about your crazy experiments" and told Nahida he has "his own convictions, we just don't share them" which were both conveniently not further explained. There is also the Jeht quest incident but i'll discuss it later on.
-- Eleazar hospital notes --
To briefly summarize the notes, he cured a patient using another dead patient's remains. His treatment was harsh but successful. These notes read like a Dr. House script, Dottore not giving a crap about the patient's religious beliefs included.
Abbas had a terrible ending because he had developed insanity and ran away. Zandik/ Dottore left a note warning not to let him go but it seems the staff didn't listen.
These notes align with how plague doctors were misunderstood and feared in real life. This motif was incorporated into his video game iteration, replacing the joker / clown persona.
Some people interpreted these notes as "Dottore murders and mutilates people that are alive for experiments" but there's no indication of that.
-- Aranara experiment notes --
These are the worst by far. It's unclear if the "subjects" were people with Eleazar or healthy people exposed to the withering for tests. It has to be pointed out that it seems the actions were done by his subordinates since it's likely Dottore reprimanding them at the end:

"This is a waste of resources. It is advisable to watch over the subjects' mental state in the next experiment and avoid exposing them to extreme environments... Lab Lead on duty: ████"

Yes, this sounds bad but it's proof he isn't a sadist that enjoys watching pain.
It also means he is higher in a moral standpoint than characters like Jack Horner. These type of characters don't care or enjoy deaths with the pretext of "we can always get more lackeys."
-- During the Jeht quest --
Froderock (a subordinate of Dottore) wants to capture an eremite. It is stated he is acting on his own and that Dottore gave an order not to kidnap eremites.
A note by another Fatui member states that Froderock is going to get killed for going against the order. We can theorize that the Harbinger himself would kill him. There's also a line about "following military regulations" which means his subordinates operate under a code and can't just kidnap people for experiments for the lols.

Fatui Negotiator: Professor Froderock was looking for live specimens in the desert — he always defied The Doctor's orders... That's just pure jealousy, if you ask me
...I urge you to consider, Captain Zoya, that if we are able to complete this research work in the desert, perhaps our entire expeditionary force may receive the favor of our great Harbinger... (This line has been crossed out using a red pen, and a line in red has been added: "How about you consider military regulations? Or perhaps you would like to consider how long you have left to live?")

A similar thing happened with Arlecchino in the Fortune Slip quest in Inazuma. Subordinates of her were acting on their own by following the previous Knave's teachings to make some orphans for the House.
-- *Time of Insight Artifact * --
It mentions a "mad scientist expelled by the akademia" and the text under it seems to be Dottore speaking.
The last part says:

"Those sellswords (Eremites) once did much for me. I trust they will not disappoint this time, either."

Combining Jeht quest with this makes it seem that eremites helped Dottore in some way and he is fond enough of them to slaughter a subordinate that brings them harm.
The following text seems to be Dottore's reason to want to capture Aranaras:

"The dream had to be captured — along with the inhabitants of the forest who could control dreams, To remind that friend once again of one's own form and the memories that were shared.
If the organ that governs memory has taken too much damage and cannot be healed, Then bring another old friend and dwell in dreams of the past together, Play in a small tree house, and explore the limitless depth of the jungle. Yes, that would be nice as well. For in dreams, everyone has a chance to start over."

I couldn't find more info about this "friend". It seems to be someone who suffered the effects of erosion or death, or an aranara that lost their memory.
-- Al Haitham's SQ --
Alhaitham: (To Siraj / the villain, after praising his intelligence)

"You would never let a test subject escape. Mistakes like that are beneath you, and you also won't leave any mistake without a resolution."

This is relevant because we know Dottore is canonically smarter than Siraj yet he didn't hunt down Collei (Barnabas is the one that traumatized and wanted to kill her), Abbas or Scara. It's a known thing there's a Fatui code that traitors and deserters are executed to avoid spilling secrets. Dottore leaves even Scara alone, you may argue that he was lazy but suspiciously Childe, who during Labyrinth Warriors was chasing Scara, soon appeared in Inazuma in a photo taking event, leaving for Snezhnaya, after Scara lost his gnosis.
It was never explained why Childe was chasing him to take away the Gnosis yet suddenly Scara appeared with Dottore without Childe. This is suspicious because Childe loves to fight, to the point he wanted to fight Arle while recovering on her SQ. He didn't even show up to finish off Scaramouche at the end.
To play Devil's advocate, it could also be Scaramouche is a part of some unknown plan too and nothing to do with mercy.
-- Dottore's speech to Niwa --
Taking into account Nahida's story that says: "the monster found solace in the kitten", the black bird referring to himself as "a monstrosity yet they are too foolish to see it" and Dottore's lines to Pierro:

"Will you call me a monster, a madman?"

Dottore sees himself as an inhuman monster. It puts into question if the following line wasn't just about Scaramouche and is actually a metaphor of Dottore speaking about his past:

"Escher: Even without you, that pure, innocent puppet would only end up being used by someone else instead. What other reason would a human have for befriending one who is not of our kind?"

Although Dottore refers to himself as "human", the two lines I quoted previously contradict this. Mentally he sees himself as not human (to the point of finding solace in a living puppet), even though his words say otherwise. There is also a chance this Dottore was no longer human at all, the Nahida story shows the monster bird had tiny floating birds around, even though he hadn't studied Scaramouche to create the segments.
There is also a stark contrast between Dottore joining the Fatui expresing concern over been rejected again yet he is embracing his monster persona in the Niwa scene.

"Escher: Think of me as a monster or a demon, if you wish... "

It could be a sign of a person with trauma who steered into an evil path. Kept getting called a monster until he accepted it.
There could be many reasons for the change, besides being used, -incoming pure speculation- he could have experimented on himself to have less emotions or taking this quote into account: "everyone has a chance to start over in dreams" he believes he can commit atrocities and it won't matter because he plans to do a reset somehow.

" The Doctor: Jester, I have completed the task you gave me. Creating a gap and infiltrating Inazuma's inner workings... Heh, what fun it was. The Doctor: I'd like to introduce a puppet to you. If he proves useful, let's make him our newest comrade. And if not... let's turn him to dust."

The bold part is more clues of either future Scara related scheming or Dottore's words are an act, mercy was shown when he became useless. It also seems that Pierro stirred him into a darker path.
I wouldn't say it's confirmation that Pierro is pure evil because we barely know anything about him, there's a chance it was for some greater good since that's a trend with the Harbingers.
-- Possible Sohreh murder --
At first glance, it seems way too obvious that Zandik did it, it's like watching a murder mystery movie and the first suspect is a red herring.
Since people frequently incorrectly state: "Dottore murdered a girl while they were having a picnic" like a fact, I'm going to make a deep dive into these notes:
First there is no clear motive for him killing Sohreh. (Niwa had a purpose.)

attack of Rishboland Tigers. In need of first aid..."

The bold part implies she was still alive while Zandik was dealing with the Ruin Guard. The broken bone didn't happen during the picnic while he was alone with her. She was declared dead and buried after the attack, she could have been killed during it while everyone was distracted.
-Does the Akademiya think that Zandik is responsible?-
There is a message board that says he was investigated over her murder.
The lack of motive combined with Zandik only receiving negative consequences from saving the team makes me think he was framed and acted on impulse / emotion when saving them or he turned it on to spook the tigers and it accidentally killed her.
Why? He could have just ran away and let everyone die to not reveal he was hiding ruin guard knowledge. Which he expressed on the notes that he didn't want the rest to know:

"I am going to take them (Ruin guards) apart, and record the size and shape one by one...
...But first of all, this secret must not be revealed to the other team members..."
...Thank goodness, Zandik reacted quickly. Otherwise, the whole team would be in serious trouble..."

-Some people argue that "running away and letting everyone die would have been too suspicious so he saved them."
It's more likely he was just a weak regular human at that point in his life so it wouldn't have been too suspicious to run away / he actually risked his life to shut it down.-
The 2 burned notes both state: "Someone seems to have burnt the contents in a hurry" it could have been the person trying to frame him. One of them is a note about the Ruin Guards and has Zandik's signature, they may have wanted to steal credit of his research.
-Regarding who framed Dottore, u/Sandflow_23 commented an excellent theory
lt seems Zandik didn't care much about Sohreh's death since he proceeded to ask the team to take back the Ruinguard while she was bleeding but the Eleazar hospital notes come after this incident. Was this his first instance of curing people?
Did being unable to save someone influence him in some way? It may just be coincidental but it's worth taking note. I'm trying to look at all possibilities.
People usually see Sohreh's note as "she learned Dottore's secret so he murdered her" But something I haven't seen discussed is how there is also a chance he trusted her and decided to open up to people more. Previously he said studying Ruinguards could get him kicked out but after the following note by Sohreh, he decided to try to convince his team to take back the ruin guard:

"...Zandik was attracted by the ancient machines left behind by some civilization here...
We had a great time and decided to go on a picnic tonight..."

Finally, to play Devil's Advocate: it seems he also had another secret mission that was never explained.

"...It's a shame that documents regarding its (the giant golem's) energy supply systems have been lost, and I have far too important a mission to accomplish to afford to start from scratch. If not..."

He could have killed her because she learned that secret but it's still weird that he'd go and choke her with people focused on him speaking about Ruinguard studies.
-- Arle SQ --
Lyney said "he proposed the direction of the research " for the bottled flames. That he wants to give people "a chance to start over" was also hinted in Time of Insight artifact. I won't be surprised if it turns out most of the injured kids he took from Crucabena are actually fine. The Eremites, which he didn't want his subordinates to kidnap, were also healthy, so this is another instance of him seeking to work with weak people to give them power. I'm NOT denying there's a chance he wants to use it for some other plan like burning the tree like other Redditors have proposed
Finally, there remains the question of which Dottore would be playable. I predict the original or Omega. (Knocking off the angelic new segment theory)
We don't know if the original is alive, since Raiden destroyed her physical body (and the segments were based on Scaramouche) he could be dead BUT giving a kill switch to Omega may have a deeper meaning. Like those fragments of his mind from dead segments will re-materialize in an empty segment or object his soul is bound to or go back to Omega and change his personality, the former sounds like FullMetal Alchemist but a Remuria quest confirms this is a thing in Genshin.
Finally done, sorry if this is ridiculously long but I wanted to provide quotes to sustain the arguments, especially since some people hate him so much based on mostly misinformation.

I’m really hoping for good advice. I (26F) have been married to my (28M) husband for 2 years now and we have a 14 month old baby. The issue is, I may have unintentionally caught feelings for someone else and I am trying to figure out how to handle it.
Background: My husband and I started dating at 16 (me) and 18 (him). We had a tumultuous relationship due to him excessively partying and treating me poorly, for the first 5 years. I broke up with him and moved out of the apartment we shared. We spent 6 months apart and ultimately got back together because I couldn’t see myself with anyone else. He promised he would never treat me like that again and he didn’t. We’ve been together 5 years since that breakup. 2 years ago we got married, bought a house, and had a baby together. things got really rocky between us, which resulted in me spending a lot of time alone/with friends following several attempts of communication and no effort on his end. I started feeling like I wanted a divorce.
Now here is the situation that I found myself in. 2 years ago, a new guy (let’s call him Jake, 28M) started working at my job. I realized quickly that I was very attracted to him. For this reason, I avoided him at all costs, but still had to communicate with him because we were on the same team. Strictly work related conversations. I am also very close friends with a woman at work (let’s call her Maya 49F). Maya and I hangout outside of work regularly. I left work for 7 months of maternity leave. During this time, I was very emotional (postpartum) and really didn’t see anyone.
Upon my return, I realized that Maya and Jake had become very close friends. A new guy also started at our work while I was gone (let’s call him Kade 39M) who also became very good friends with Maya and Jake. The three of them hung out a lot while I was gone. Upon my return, I basically joined their friend group and began hanging out with them regularly outside of work. Now, I still avoided Jake at all costs. I had very limited conversation with him, when going out together. I never had his number and we never texted until the next time we went out and Maya asked me to text him to see when he was arriving.
Now, on this night we all went downtown. We decided to head to another bar in a neighboring city. Jake and I realized that we live right next to each other. Maya and Kade carpooled together. I offered to take Jake in my car, as he had walked to downtown and my car was parked there and we’d be heading back to the same place at the end of the night.
Jake and I spoke more during this night (entirely platonically). At the end of the night, I went to drive him home. We ended up talking in the car for hours. Again the conversation was appropriate. No emotional/physical cheating. Just basic things like where we grew up, how work is going, what our favorite places in town are. At the end of the night, Jake confesses that he’s been attracted to me since he started and that he likes me (he knows I’m married and have a child). I stated that I appreciated the honesty but I am married. He understood and stated that he wanted to be friends. He left my car. He never invited me inside, tried to touch me, or did anything inappropriate. He was very respectful. We did not speak at all after this night.
Fast forward a few weeks, I get a call from Maya, who is very concerned about Jake. She stated that he had not been to work in weeks and hadn’t responded to any of her texts or calls. She stated she was going to call crisis response. I offered to stop by his house to check on him, since he lives right next to me.
I showed up at his house, to find him sleeping in the middle of the day. He broke down in tears and told me that he had gotten so depressed (personal issues) that he had not been able to eat, go to work, take care of himself etc. I offered my help. I spent the whole day helping him clean his place and then we went out for lunch together. Again, everything was platonic and my husband knew that I was with him, helping him all day. As you can imagine, I learned a lot about him and how similar we are. He was very grateful that I came to check on him and thanked me for being a good friend. Ultimately, his issues caused him to leave work, so we do not work together anymore.
I would like to point out that during this time, I realized that I was falling for him and knew it was because I felt like I was losing feelings for my husband. I decided to communicate with my husband, once more, about how I was feeling and decided to pour my best effort into our marriage. He also did the same for me, agreeing that we needed to work on things. Presently, things are the best that they have been, in years, between us. I am in love with him and feel satisfied in the marriage. I am happy and continue to give him my all.
The problem is… I can’t stop thinking about Jake. I don’t know how to deal with it. We don’t talk at all, we no longer work together, and I see him maybe once a month or once every two months, when Maya invites us both to something. Last time, which was a week ago, it was unavoidable, as I was out at lunch with Maya and she called Jake in the middle of lunch, to invite him to come and have a drink, as he lives nearby. I barely spoke to him the whole time.
The issue is, it’s been making me feel very down. I catch myself thinking about him everyday, wondering what he is doing, and thinking about how it would be nice to hangout again. It feels like I’m going through heartbreak while married - which is so silly. I’ve tried to stay busy, focus on my husband and child, and avoid all contact. Nothing helps. I can’t stop thinking about him. It has made me feel so down that it has interfered with my ability to complete everyday tasks. I’ve fallen into some sort of depression over this.
I know the whole thing with people thinking the grass is always greener on the other side, when really it isn’t. I know people romanticize others, and turn them into the ideal person in their head, when that isn’t the reality. I feel like I’ve now seen the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of him and it hasn’t changed the way I feel. He is basically me in male form and that has done my head in.
Of course, some details are left out due to the crazy length of this post already. The post makes it sound like I feel this way based on 1-2 interactions. I’ve gotten to know him quite well over the last 8 months and things are no longer imaginary in my head. I know his personality well, his struggles, and favorite things. I know all about his family, upbringing, values, and beliefs. I’m not trying to justify anything, just explaining that he is everything I thought he would be, which is where I think my feelings are coming from.
Has anyone else been in this situation? How do I get over it? I feel like I’m really doing everything I can to move past it, but I can’t help the way I feel. I have no intention of cheating or leaving my husband. It has been 8 months of me feeling this way and nothing has changed. My brain can’t seem to let it go. I’ve never been in this situation before.
If you’ve read this far, thank you for your time and sorry for the long post.
TL;DR: I (26f) am married to my (28M) husband. I caught feelings for my (28m) coworker and I’m trying to get over it. Looking for advice.

So during the final months I was working at my old Walmaet store, one of my trans male friends applied for a overnight stocker job, so naturally I was thrilled. But that quickly turned into sheer misery for my friend because management would FREQUENTLY deadname him during the opening meeting and them and my coworkers would REPEATEDLY misgender him. He got pretty fed up with it and quit about a month after he started.
Fast forward about 6 months or so after I myself left and I see a "Now Hiring Overnight Stockers" post on Facebook from my old store, claiming they accept people from all walks of life. I decided to publicly call them out on their bullshit and retell the story about how they made my trans friend's life utter hell (leaving his name out, of course).
That post shockingly stayed up for.a solid two months before I later noticed they banned me from commenting on their posts and fully blocked me about another couple months after that.

This is something really bothers me (36F). I still can't get rid of the remorse but of course I can't tell him also. 3 years ago, my company prepared a work trip for me and many coworkers. It was a hotel at one of the biggest coastal and touristic cities of USA, I don't want to give much details about that part. My husband (34M) got a few days off from work, for looking after our toddlers.
First two days passed normal, I was doing ordinary things and enjoying the trip with my coworkers. I also kept in contact with my husband via phone calls. It all happened at third night. There was the weekly "entertainment night" of the hotel's bar that night. With two close coworkers, I went down and we had a few drinks. As hours passed, both of them went back to their rooms but I chose to stay since I didn't have anything to do at my room for the night. Enjoying the music and taking sips from my cocktail, a tall blond guy -which seemed like a tourist- came and started a conversation with me. I was already a bit dizzy because of drinks, normally I wouldn't make such long conversations with strangers, but the conversation continued. Shortly after he ordered another drink for him and me, and he obviously started hitting on me. I still don't know why I never rejected him, maybe I was drunk or he seemed too attractive to me. After finishing drinks, we started dancing on the floor and kissed, eventually went up to his room. We had sex in his room that night.
Next morning, I woke up with a headache and I just remembered the night when I saw the guy sleeping naked with me. I was naked too. I quickly got up, got dressed and went back to my room. Quickly taking a shower, I was still not believing I cheated on my husband and I started crying for hours afterwards. I tried to make it not obvious for my coworkers. I never saw that guy again. Eventually the work trip ended and I went back to my home, not telling a word to my husband.
I kinda feel like I forgot the thing in 3 years, but when I remember it, it still gives me the terrible remorse and regret. I don't want to lose him and my kids so I can't tell it to him either. I know I'm not innocent but simply I cannot end my marriage just for being honest.

Since FNaF: Into The Pit was revealed to the public, there were a lot of theories about "What new things will this game bring that, perhaps, were not completely clear in the novel?" Well, after some leaked info about Jeff, the owner of Jeff's Pizza (Freddy Fazbear's Pizza in the past), some people (me included) think that is very possible that his true identity was Michael Afton all along. This even made more sense as a possibility when Mega Cat Studios revealed a glimpse of Jeff in the game; purple-skinned, for some strange reason, and that it was revealed since the Graphic Novel Edition that "Into The Pit" was set in 2020.
Now, Michael being Jeff make that some weird things about Jeff's original description in the novel make a lot of sense:

Today, like all other days, Jeff looked as if he hadn’t slept in a week. His dark hair was sticking up in weird places, and he had alarming bags under his bloodshot eyes. It was funny. Jeff’s expression never changed. He looked tired and miserable even when he was being extra nice. And when he thought about it, Jeff was kind of creepy, too. He looked a hundred years old but was probably just thirty. With those heavy-lidded, bloodshot eyes, the stained apron, and the slow speech and movement, he was like a zombie pizza chef.

The last description is the most important, because we all know since FNaF: Sister Location's Custom Night minigames that Michael ended up looking like a zombie with a slow pace, and from his monologue it is known that his intonation was also just as slow. And if you take a quick look at what a one hundred year old person looks like, they sadly fit to a zombie-like description (most of the time.)
The most interesting thing to me about that description is the mention of Jeff, probably, being a 30 year old guy, because... why did they draw such a direct conclusion, and on top of that, classify it as a "probability"? If I have to guess, it's because that description was meant to reveal the age Michael Afton had when he died.
This alone is not enough to draw a specific conclusion about the chronological location of FNaF: Sister Location, beyond the age one can assume of Michael in 1983, which still leaves us with a wide repertoire of options. But this is where a page from the Survival Logbook comes in that I had not given enough attention to at the time, but now makes me believe that it was always the answer; the page 32 39.
This is one of the few pages that Mike uses to draw something. At the time, most of us thought that it was only supposed to depict that this book was clearly meant to reveal Golden Freddy's soul name. And even if I still believe that's the case, there's still the question of "why would Mike draw a tombstone in the first place?" Perhaps we should take a look to what the page is about:

One way to find hope in a seemingly hopeless situation is to fast-forward and try peeking into the future. Let's give it a try-what will your like look like in five years?

Most of the people believe the book is meant to give us a better look at Mike during the events of FNaF 1, with several of us believing the same despite the book actually being meta (not an in-universe logbook). Since the strongest stance that FNaF: Sister Location takes place after FNaF 1, because Michael mentions having already met the Missing Children and the "Dittophobia" story revealing lore of Circus Baby's Entertainment and Rental, is very clear for most of us that Michael had his first death after FNaF 1.
If this page was meant to depict that he died five years later, and "Into The Pit" was meant to reveal that he died being a 30 years old guy, then not only we would reach the conclusion that FNaF: Sister Location is set in 1998, but also that Mike would have been a 25 year old guy during FNaF 1. Now, where we've seen that same age for Mike before?

At twenty-five years old, Mike was okay with his age. He was cool with his looks, too. He was five foot six and in pretty good shape, even though he didn’t have time to work out too much. He didn’t think his dark brown hair, hazel eyes, and regular features were particularly handsome, but they weren’t ugly, either.

Yes, FNaF: The Offical Movie Novel, where Mike Schmidt is a 25 year old guy. We have the right to question whether Mike's age during the year 2000 in which the movie takes place is appropriate for what he was in FNaF 1 for obvious reasons, but at the same time, it is a probability considering what Scott Cawthon said he had planned to do with these films during Dawko's interview:

and people who go to see the movie aren't gonna want to see a retelling of the books. They're gonna want to see the first game. They're gonna want to see a retelling of the story that got them interested in the first place, you know? The first game had the right atmosphere, the right characters, and that's what people are gonna want. And um, ideally, if the first movie does really well, I think it will work great as a trilogy. Um, Five Nights at Freddy's 1, Five Nights at Freddy's 2, and Five Nights at Freddy's 3, based on the first three games.

And since then, there were a lot of statements either from Scott and the people involved on the movie themselfs that FNaF: The Movie was clearly meant to reimagine the first game.
My conclusion would be that FNaF: Sister Location takes place in 1998 (not sure in what season tho, maybe Autumn?) and that Michael Afton was a 15 year old kid during 1983, a 25 year old guy in 1993, and finally, a 30 year old man in 1998. What do you think?

EDIT: This was apparently fairly quickly reversed: Amid outcry, communications minister backtracks, orders seized equipment returned to AP (Times of Israel)

Israeli officials seized a camera and broadcasting equipment belonging to The Associated Press in southern Israel on Tuesday, accusing the news organization of violating a new media law by providing images to Al Jazeera.

Source (emphasis mine)
A rather hilarious development to land coming off the freedom and censorship podcast. Here's the bit that feels relevant to me:

The government shouldn't be in the business of saying what the press can talk about. There are obviously corner conditions to talk about when it comes to national security, state secrets, etc.

This is of course parsed from a longer discussion about journalistic curation and is near the end of the pod (1:16:17 I believe) but now it's ringing in my ears given I was already wondering how he seemed to dismiss Al Jazeera as a "so called news organization" in 367 whereas I've heard them characterized as excellent but for their massive editorializing on anything involving Israel (admittedly I can't quite source where I got that idea).
Point is he seemed pretty clearly unconcerned at the free speech/press implications of banning Al Jazeera but now AP is being dinged for sharing content with Al Jazeera (hardly only them) and the sanction has included forcibly removing a live feed of Gaza that's existed since October 7th.
This is at least a bad look for Israel's officials, is it not? Do you think Sam will see it that way? I don't see how even a somewhat cautious defender of free expression as he is can justify this move is my bias.
(EDIT: thank you a_green_orange for highlighting the update)