TLDR: my boyfriend’s ex keeps trying to find her way back into his life and it’s driving me crazy. What do I do?
First, the backstory for anyone who is interested:
I met my boyfriend 6 months ago when I was out with some coworkers the night before thanksgiving. A coworker introduced us and that was just that.
I hadn’t been in a relationship for 5 years, although I’ve had countless talking stages and some “situationships” (none that I could ever see turning into a real relationship). Overall, I was pretty comfortable being on my own and wasn’t really looking for anyone.
When I met my boyfriend, I could tell he was someone worth taking seriously and that would also take me seriously. I felt safe and comfortable with him right away, enough that I let him take me home that night which was unusual for me. Ever since then, we’ve been seeing each other. He immediately ended things with a girl he had a casual thing with and we were exclusive right away, and about a month and a half later “official”.
This relationship has been largely different from anything I’ve experienced because of the way he pursued me; he would call me most nights and talk and ask me questions about my past, my present, my future, what I wanted in a relationship, what my dealbreakers are, etc. It actually was terrifying having someone show this much interest in me; I’ve had a couple painful experiences including a brief marriage and divorce in my early 20s. I really held him at an arms length for the first couple months, but overall I’ve really grown to love him and hope for a future with him.
All of that being said, there’s something that is driving me crazy. His ex.
To make a long story longer, they dated for 3 years, she moved in with him for a decent part of that, and while it sounds like it was a serious relationship that he was thinking about longterm with (he gave her a promise ring at some point), it doesn’t sound like it was a particularly healthy relationship. His friends all hated her, to the point they started asking him to come alone when they invited him to things. (And no his friends aren’t assholes, they are very friendly to me and I’m always invited) As a result, he would just stay home with her rather than tell her that she wasn’t welcome to come with him. He would go golf with his buddies and she’d call him an hour in and tell him he was gone too long and needed to come home. She hated all his female friends and would take his phone and block them or start arguments with them.
The thing that ended it was when she told him she was going out one night, and he woke up at 2am to notice she had never come home. He checked her location and she was at a hotel a town over. He drove over there and picked her up from her rendezvous with her married coworker and kicked her out of his house and ended things with her in the morning.
She kept trying to work things out with him but continued sleeping with her coworker the whole time until finally he told her he was just done with it. She came to his house to get her stuff, tried taking their dogs, started a fight with him, went home, and filed a restraining order saying he held her captive in his house all day. When they went to court, he showed the judges all of the calls and texts she sent him after the break up asking to see him and saying she needed him to come blow her back out. The judge asked her if she thought she was in danger and she responded “oh no he would never hurt me” needless to say, the judge declined the restraint order. (Yes I have fact check all of this)
It shocks me that anyone could do all of that to someone else, especially to someone like my boyfriend. I’ve only known him to be hard working, easy going, steady, gentle, and affectionate.
It shocks me even more that after all of that, she still has the audacity try to continue to talk to him, see him, and spend time with his family. She has stayed in touch with his cousin that lives in a different state, so that when she (the cousin), comes to visit, she (the ex) has an excuse to try to hang out with him (he refuses, but over thanksgiving he missed time with his family because his cousin invited her over so she was there with all of his family while he stayed home alone. Over easter he told his cousin he didn’t want to see his ex when she tried inviting her to come hang out with them.) she adopted a dog she couldn’t take care of and then asked my boyfriend to take it (this was before we were together), and will text him periodically to ask about the dog, etc. she’ll send him follow requests on Instagram, and when he declines it, she sends it again weeks later. He blocked her on Facebook but she follows his business page (he had a construction company) and has recently started liking his stuff.
She is absolutely aware he has a girlfriend, and he’s made it pretty clear he hates her, so after everything she has done to him, why in the world does she keep trying to find ways back into his life? His cousin gets married in a few months- I have no idea if I’m invited to come with him (and how do I bring it up?), but if I had to guess, there’s a good chance the cousin will invite her. I worry that she will try to use it as another opportunity to try to get close to him or try to get him back?? Especially if I don’t get to come with him. Is she trying to get him back?? Is she trying to be friends to absolve her guilt?
I’ll admit I’ve started fights with my boyfriend about her because of all of this, which haven’t really brought productive results. While he doesn’t entertain her and the way he handles these situations isn’t WRONG, I do wish he would be more assertive about setting boundaries with her, or just completely block her number and social media so she can’t keep reaching out. As I’ve gotten to know him better, I can see he isn’t always great at setting boundaries with the people in his life and seems to just try to do whatever is agreeable to everyone else to avoid conflict, even if he secretly resents it.
So I guess here’s where I want advice;
-why is she doing this? -if it continues, how do I respond to her behavior without stooping to her level or creating a bigger issue? -how do I have a productive conversation about this with my boyfriend? -is this something I should be considering breaking up with him over?
Sorry this was so long, part of me wanted to paint a picture and the other part of me just found it therapeutic to write all of this out.

From Gautama Buddha at the 2024 Easter Webinar: Link to full text follows.
"And that is why if you expect that when the Conscious You steps outside a subconscious self, it should feel a certain way. Then you will miss the experience. But you have had this experience or you would not have found an ascended master teaching. And you would not have followed it and studied it and made an effort to apply it.
Many of you know you have had the experience. But you are still hoping that one day there will be a more dramatic experience. But you see, it is again one of these enigmas. In order to motivate people to start the path, we have to give them a goal. But the goal has to be something they can grasp and see as desirable with their present level of consciousness. And when they are in this separate conceptual mind, they will want the goal to be something that is better compared to what they are experiencing in the Sea of Samsara.
When they actually experience the Christ mind, it will feel like an anti-climax, like a disappointment. And the outer mind will say, “Is this it? Was this really what they call this spiritual experience? Is this what I have been striving for?” But you see, it is not what the outer mind has been striving for. Because the outer mind has been striving for some kind of fantasy picture that never existed.
If you are attached to these expectations and images created by the outer mind, you will miss it when you have a genuine experience of the Christ mind. Many students, especially avatars, come to the spiritual path, as we have said before, with this desire to be validated as being special. It is really the biggest hindrance for spiritual movements and for spiritual growth, is this desire to be special.
Now it is understandable because when you came as avatars, you have been put down by the fallen beings. And it is understandable you want to compensate for it. Many come, they hear about the path to Christhood, and they think, “Ah, when I attain Christhood, then I will be special in this world. Then I’ll get the recognition. Then I’ll get the compensation. Then I will have all of these supernatural abilities that can prove to other people that I really am special, and therefore, they can realize how wrong they were in putting me down”.
This is not an uncommon expectation that many people have a touch of. Most avatars have it still. This is what can cause students to come to a point where they are now beginning to realize that we of the ascended masters will not acknowledge them and make them feel special. They may also come to the messenger with this desire for him to make them feel special, and then they realize that this messenger is not playing that game, well, they become disappointed.
And then what do they do? Well, they face this choice. Will, they look at themselves and see that this expectation, this desire to be special, came from a separate self? Or will they refuse to do this and therefore, they have to project out that there is something wrong with the messenger or something wrong with the teachings? “These are not the real ascended masters because surely the real ascended masters would recognize me for how special I am? How could the ascended masters not recognize me when I am so special? Surely the ascended masters have the vision to see how special I am?”
We do have the vision to see how special your ego wants to be. And we also have the vision to see beyond it and see your real potential that is being blocked by the ego’s desire to be special in this world. Instead of seeking the uniqueness in your I AM Presence. And were we to help you feel special in this world, well, we would only hinder your growth, perhaps for many lifetimes. It is actually better for such people that they reject the messenger or the message and go their own way rather than feeling validated by the messenger or by us through him."
https://ascendedmasterlight.com/transcending-the-false-path-plotted-by-the-conceptual-mind/

Used to browse gaming youtube videos that'd discuss this sort of thing. I love the idea of hiding easter eggs and secrets out of the way, that can expand on the world if you find them.
Thing is, it's way tougher to put this in text than in a visual medium. In a movie, you can have a friendly politician fellow, but then if you pause during the right frame, you can see slits behind his jawbone. "Gasp! Is he a lizardman??" Even better in a game, where you could optionally sneak into his room and find all the human skin suits he has in the closet.
But it's way tougher to make this work in books because by design, nothing's supposed to be "missable". 100% of it gets funneled through your eyes. So if you wrote in text that any of this evidence was found, it can't just be something for the fans to enjoy speculating about. It reads like a plot thread that ought to get resolved.
So far, folks have suggested two ways to me in which you could organically hide a secret in a story. One would be if the story was told in the form of letters. Seems like nothing, unless you pick up on a code in one of the letters. If you crack it, you'll discover they're writing under duress! Oh no!
And then there's also say, if you had a character with a strange condition that forced them to speak in random tongues. You could have them speak gibberish, but if anyone decides to copy & paste those words and translate them from Klingon, you'll find out that person was saying "I was the one who killed JR!" or some other MatPat stuff.
So yeah. Curious to hear if anyone knows ways that books can provide little gizmos in the corners, without infringing on the central story. Something extra for the audience to chew on, as DS fans do whenever they find a giant cucumber in Seath's bedside table, and the description reads that dragons coveted these for their solitary pleasure for millenia.

Barron, Laird. “Vastation,” The Beautiful Thing that Awaits Us All and Other Stories (Night Shade Books, 2013)
“He had still been Randolph Carter, a fixed point in the dimensional seething. Now, beyond the Ultimate Gateway, he realised in a moment of consuming fright that he was not one person, but many persons.”
“There were “Carters” in settings belonging to every known and suspected age of earth’s history, and to remoter ages of earthly entity transcending knowledge, suspicion, and credibility. “Carters” of forms both human and non-human, vertebrate and invertebrate, conscious and mindless, animal and vegetable. And more, there were “Carters” having nothing in common with earthly life, but moving outrageously amidst backgrounds of other planets and systems and galaxies and cosmic continua.”
“No death, no doom, no anguish can arouse the surpassing despair which flows from a loss of identity. Merging with nothingness is peaceful oblivion; but to be aware of existence and yet to know that one is no longer a definite being distinguished from other beings—that one no longer has a self—that is the nameless summit of agony and dread.”
H. P. Lovecraft – “The Gates of the Silver Key”
Preface:
When I volunteered to do a write-up for our year-long Laird Barron reading, Greg casually mentioned –slyly, one might say– that he had been planning to cover “Vastation” and would I like a crack at it instead? “Sure,” I said. “I like a challenge, why not?” My wife has left me. No one comes to visit me in this place where I have been taken. Even the rats and fleas, so ubiquitous in the rest of the institution, give my cell a wide berth. They know something is wrong. My thoughts spiral; I write in circles. It is possible that in a previous life I was a detective attempting to construct a timeline from a serial killer’s wall of thumbtacks and string. I will have my revenge on Greg.
Another Preface:
“Vastation” is actually a very straightforward story. You only need to familiarize yourself with the works of H. P. Lovecraft, read a little weird fiction literary theory, and stumble across an old interview between Laird and Greg. “Vastation” is what you get when you bludgeon Lovecraft’s stories over the head and throw their remains down a deep well into the Laird Barron cosmos. To crudely rearrange a few of Laird’s thoughts from the above-mentioned interview:
“Time is a ring… the universe is dirty… it’s all about stomach acids and semen and blood and effluvia… there’s even theories that it’s a cellular structure. [I]f you can get to the edge of the universe… If you were able to travel in your physical form, like superman, out to not the edge of the universe but the edge of all creation… you would cease to exist because there’s no room for you to exist there.”1
You drop Randolph Carter’s, “moment of consuming fright,” his epiphany at the end of everything that he is all living things, into Laird’s vision of an unending, hungering, ouroboros of time and space, and we have the premise of “Vastation.”
Two more points.

1. In reading many, but not all, of Lovecraft’s stories alluded to in, “Vastation,” I have learned that old Howie loved to write about characters living through the ages, living multiple lives, and taking numerous identities. The most prominent after, “The Gates of the Silver Key,” would be “The Case of Charles Dexter Ward.” Attention should also be paid to “The Whisperer in Darkness,” because it is the first appearance of the Mi-Go, who I believe to be the inspiration for Laird’s Pod People. 

2. The author and critic John Clute wrote a wonderful piece on the concept of vastation in regards to literary horror. He defines it, in part, as, “… a laying waste to a land or a psyche; a physical or psychological devastation; desolation… the even more disintegrative moment when the accidents of goodness are shaved mercilessly from the unsalvageable central core of the wicked.” In other words, vastation is when the illusory fabric of reality is pulled out from under the feet of the protagonist or narrator, exposing the absolute horrors beneath. In most horror or weird fiction stories vastation occurs gradually throughout the text or once at the climax. In “Vastation,” it happens endlessly. 

Summary and analysis:
“Vastation” is, as Laird once put it, “a “6000-word monologue from an unutterably mad superhuman” (UMS). Like Randolph Carter, he—and UMS does think of him/itself as a he, more on that later—knows that in some impossible sense he is all people, all living beings, throughout all of creation. He lives countless lives. He knows the future and the past, albeit imperfectly. He knows how to jump his consciousness from one body to another, how to travel time, how to manipulate biology on a molecular level. His knowledge and powers and nearly godlike. In death, in sleep, or simply by staring into his own left “freakish eyeball,” he visits the infernal blackhole known as Ur-Nyctos, the “the quaking mass at the center of everything,” and “portal to the blackest of hells.” There, he shatters into quantum nothingness before reconstituting somewhere else along the ring, and he knows it will never stop. World without end, lives without end, vastations without end.
Things get darker. Completely insane, UMS spends eternity killing himself, killing his friends, getting killed by his friends, and participating in the occasional apocalypse, all the while somewhat aware he is everyone he has ever killed and everyone who will ever kill him. Every turn of the ring is the same story from a different angle, like UMS riding a train at night, looking at his reflection in the dark window.
“Vastation” begins with the answer to an impossible question. Where does the story of someone unshackled from cause and effect, imprisoned in an eternally looping cosmos, start? How did UMS become the unutterably mad superhuman? Laird throws so many red herrings at us. Does the story begin in Chicago, when UMS dies at the hands of his personal Judas, Pontius Sacrus? Or in Crete, when he claims to have been a mere flea, or human, and beholds Ur-Nyctos through the keyhole in the potter’s hidden room (shout out to “Jaws of Saturn”)? Or when he abandons his distant-future body to be taken over by the Pod People? None of these moments contain UMS’s origin because they have happened before and will happen again ad infinitum. In “Vastation,” there are no first times. Laird solves this paradox by burying a plot point from “The Gates of the Silver Key” in the first words of “Vastation.”
“When I was six, I discovered a terrible truth; I was the only human being on the planet.” Notice, UMS did not say, “when I was six years old.” I spent weeks wondering what that meant. Then I noticed that Laird twice calls time traveling “tripping back.” It seemed oddly specific and turned out to be a phrase from “The Gates of the Silver Key,” in which, after Randolph Carter experiences the Zen-through-cosmic-horror epiphany I quoted at the top of this write-up, he beseeches Yog-Sothoth—because of course Yog-Sothoth makes an appearance— for even greater forbidden knowledge. Yog-Sothoth tells Carter, “what you wish, I have found good; and I am ready to grant that which I have granted eleven times only to beings of your planet—five times only to those you call men, or those resembling them.”
Five men, making Carter the sixth human, or sixth being resembling a human. “When I was six, I discovered…” The previous five are Pontiff Sacrus and UMS’s other friends.
About Pontiff Sacrus, I also spent an embarrassing amount of time obsessing over him. It may be of interest to know that high priests of ancient Rome were known as the College of Pontiffs, that the most prestigious position in the college was held by the Rex Sacrorum, that Ted is short for Edward, and that Edward Hutchinson is a necromancer who lives many lives and a significant character in “The Case of Charles Dexter Ward.”
By the way, the other time Laird stamps his foot and stares pointedly at the reader is when he employs the term “essential saltes.” It’s from “Charles Dexter Ward,” which begins with the following quote:
“The essential Saltes of Animals may be so prepared and preserved, that an ingenious Man may have the whole Ark of Noah in his own Studie, and raise the fine Shape of an Animal out of its Ashes at his Pleasure; and by the lyke Method from the essential Saltes of humane Dust, a Philosopher may, without any criminal Necromancy, call up the Shape of any dead Ancestour from the Dust whereinto his Bodie has been incinerated.”
So, UMS is damned to eternal life and eternal vastation. He, understandably, is insane. He whom the gods would destroy, they first make mad. Denials, contradictions, and possibly flat-out lies fill his monologue. Again, it’s in the first sentence. “I was the only human being on the planet.” He has to tell himself this. The knowledge of what he always will be, what he always has done, what he always will do., is too terrible for him to bear. He denies his infinite identities with the solipsist problem of other minds. He cannot be other people because other people are fungible, mere cheap Xerox’s, fleas; he is the only real McCoy. This is especially true of women—I said we would return to gender. While humanity in general is “grist for the mill,” women are either mentioned in passing or, in the case of UMS’s wives, described as inhuman automatons.
Think about it. Even though, on an infinite loop, he has done everything, been every human, has been/will be Beyoncé releasing her country album, Joan of Arc leading her men into battle, Martha Stewart receiving her sentence, and Bathory forcing some girl—who is also him—to kick stars, UMS never describes a single life he has spent as a woman. I think this is UMS grasping at an identity. It’s not that he necessarily hates women more than any other aspect of his universal selves so much as he is clinging to his gender as a self-defense mechanism. He is an individual because he flirts with Macedonian honeys. He is himself and not the wives he is tired of fucking, who are artificial anyway, even as they react to him with the very human responses of fear and suicide.2
Returning to the big picture, UMS’s cosmic gender identity issues are just the micro in the macro. Every timeline, every epoch, in “Vastation” is a story of committing murder to avoid forbidden knowledge. UMS’s wife kills herself rather than spend another night next to him as he dreams of Ur-Nyctos. UMS kills the potter before he can finish explaining how his wheel-device works—get it? — and then kills iteration after iteration of himself before he discovers the bloody peephole in the potter’s hidden chamber. He’s accused of witchcraft and imprisoned in a different well where he cannot share his knowledge of the past or future with anyone except other aspects of himself who mock him from the mouth of his prison. He reveals nanotech and genetic engendering to humanity, then commits global genocide to erase this knowledge. Again and again, UMS tries to keep humanity and himself from forbidden knowledge he cannot escape, murderously, scrambling back from the edges of vastation, forever failing.
There’s so much more. Any person who doesn’t miss the days when he went to sleep at a reasonable hour could write a dissertation on “Vastation.” I haven’t even TOUCHED most of the Lovecraft Easter eggs I found. I had a blast working on this, but this is me holding my gloves up and yelling, “no mas, no mass.” I’m going to bed.
Discussion:

1. Gordon van Gelder famously told Laird that he had bought “Shiva, Open Your Eye” (Laird’s first professional sale) because he wanted to see what Laird would do next. Ten years later, Vastation saw publication in Cthulhu’s Reign and has been called something of a reincarnation of “Shiva.” What similarities do we see? 

   1. I suspect, but could not find enough support in the texts, that UMS’s ascendancy into superhuman status, or his visits to Ur-Nyctos—if there is a difference—is what awakens the Old Ones, drawing their attention to pitiful humanity. He does seem to do his best to avoid them. Thoughts?
   2. If anyone has any thoughts about what Laird was referencing when UMS pushes his best friend off a bridge I would love to hear it.
   3. Does Laird deny UMS a name because he is everyone?
   4. “After I made me, I crushed the mold under my heel.” That’s some sort of pun about the fungal Pod People, right?
   Footnotes / references
   
2. from an interview between Greg and Laird which took place on June 23, 2021.
   “There was one theory, if you can get to the edge of the universe, somehow get to the leading, bleeding edge of reality, it’s actually, it would compress you to, basically it would get narrower and narrower. You would get flattened. If you were able to travel in your physical form, like superman, out to not the edge of the universe but the edge of all creation, it acts just like a blade… you would cease to exist because there’s no room for you to exist there.
   And that was one theory. But the other theory was--you know how a fountain works? You’ve got a base of water and it shoots up, and it looks like a different stream of water coming out of the angel’s mouth, but it’s just the water cycling. It’s the same water going through. That was another theory about the universe. It is constantly going through itself. If you recycle the water through the fountain, or you pull a slinky through itself, or a sock, it just constantly turns into itself over and over again.
   …maybe it’s not always 100% the same, because the slinky moves left or right a few millimeters. Unless you have it on a machine going through the same exact angle at the same speed, possibly there’s: this time it went through like this; maybe it wobbled a little bit. That’s how we could get the idea of free will. That determinism vs. you can have a little control over your destiny…
   Time is a ring… the universe is dirty. Look at the processes of all--there could be life forms out there that are very clean and just made of light and music…[b]ut generally speaking, it’s all about stomach acids and semen and blood and effluvia and all this stuff. So I was like alright, it’s an organic--the universe is very organic. There’s even theories that it’s a cellular structure.”
   
   1. Anyone interested in this type of analysis might want to check out Julia Kristeva’s theory of the abject.

Hey there, I have over 200 hours in paleo pines and many rares and ultra rares. I completed the story and I had those chocolate egg things too from the Easter event.
I accidentally deleted my whole profile. The entire thing, on accident. So basically I play on switch and it gets laggy when you have too many saves and auto saves so you have to delete them quite often. I was casually doing this paying attention to Youtube, using muscle memory to delete all the extra saves. (for those who don’t play on switch you use the Y button to delete saves) and I didn’t realize it was gone until I got kicked back to the screen where you select your save to play as, and I was devastated.
That basically wraps this up, sorry for making you guys read a wall of text for a silly dinosaur game lmao! If anyone has a suggestion for what I can do to get all my Dino’s back I would be super appreciative!

I (M30) have been talking to a neighbor (F34) for five months. At first she was cordial, simply friendly. She's not very talkative over text, but correct when she does. We met up a few times to have a coffee and talk, good conversation, time passed quickly, we laughed and we even talked about some intimate things about past relationships, for example, he told me that he was studying a master's degree and that he will finish between May and June.
She is not very talkative in writing (she can go a whole day without watching WA) but she is talkative in person, and from what she told me she is not a very bold or open person either, it is difficult for her and she always says that she is overwhelmed and with little time for studies.
Over time I became attached to the point of saying "I like you" and I let her know before I went on vacation for a few days. She told me that she appreciated my sincerity, that she also enjoyed the moments we shared and that she wanted it to flow. .
With that answer I considered everything lost, I saw that we were not at the same point, nothing happens, things happen. I responded to her message hoping I hadn't made her uncomfortable and it ended there, or so I thought. A few days later she wrote to me from the stadium where I usually go to watch soccer, sending a photo and joking that the team was going to lose. Curiously, I didn't see the message until I got home, but I did see her on the field and I went to greet her, you always have to be polite and without hard feelings.
A few days later, she congratulated me on Easter with a portion of cake that she made. This is where my doubts began, was the flow thing an excuse to say no, or did I really want it that way?
We continued talking and seeing each other again, as always, very correct and pleasant.
At this point, she knows my intentions but I am not clear about hers. Since I wanted to see if we could go a little further than her, I told her to have dinner one day, outside or at my house, whatever was most comfortable for her. I assume that he saw the message but it took him two days to respond. Her response was that "for her, yes, but he already knew how she had her agenda." At this point I assumed, again, that I was dragging my feet, that when I told him he would tell me that he would be busy or that he couldn't or whatever, but that he was not going to propose an alternative or a date, so I I told him "ok, you'll tell me." She did not say anything.
Two weeks passed and there was no message from her on her part, nor from me, since I assumed that my messages bother her or matter to her 0, but she responds out of politeness and that's it. I guess it was like joint ghosting since we had both stopped talking at the same time and there was no one who was sending messages to the other without a response.
Between resignation and sadness the days passed, until a few days ago she wrote to me again asking me how she was doing, that she had not heard from me for days. She excites me but she baffles me, on the one hand I notice the interest, but again she dilates a lot in the messages, I feel that it is difficult to have a dynamic and fluid conversation like the one I would like to have.
I'm at a point where I don't know whether to keep waiting to see if she changes or if she stays the same, a part of me wants to invite her for coffee or a drink, but on the other hand I think it should be her who says it, since she ignored the previous proposal and did not propose an alternative. It wasn't the first time she said no to me and I don't want to be annoying trying to meet up and have her reject him.
So I don't know whether to open up and express what I feel, tell him that I like him but it's hard for me to have long conversations that lead to nothing and even more so when we don't see each other, continue and wait or cut off the relationship permanently.
TLDR Stay in touch and be patient, or cut off the relationship with someone who gives me mixed signals?

I was thinking, what's the point of a funeral if I don't know anyone?
I'd be just celebrating my death alone, just like I do my birthday, Christmas, Valentine's Day, and Easter.
I have no one, but you.
My mommas dead, and my daddy's dead too.
My siblings treat me like I murdered their newborn and committed fraud with their names.
I have no friends at all, you and my boss are the only people that text and call me.
And I can't afford an animal to cherish either
I'm unnoticed like a leaf amongst many in fall, soon you won't think about me, you'll treat me seasonal.
Sometimes, I feel like a glitch. Like I'm not supposed to be here, like my brain doesn't belong in my body... I should have been a tree instead.
At least if I were a tree, I wouldn't long for belonging, love and wanting to be wanted. I'd be satisfied with just the rain, seasons, and the sun.
But unfortunately, I am human. By design, I crave what I can't obtain.
Sincerely, the loneliest girl on the eastcoast

I can’t do this
I (21 m) am 7 weeks post breakup and the pain is unbearable right now. I was dumped over text. We’ve been together since right before 11th grade (4.5 years) and she told me she felt compliant to me for 3.5 of them. I was controlling in some ways (so was she) but I also cared for her when nobody else did and We both were long distance for college and that was a strain but we also got so excited to see each other and I thought we had such fun every summer when I’d stay with her.
The day of the start of the breakup was Easter. Two weeks before she had seemed distant but played it off as that she was stressed about school. That was the first time I’d ever questioned anything. Our goodbye was still drawn out with lots of hugs and a long goodbye. Felt nothing abnormal as I drove back. We talked normal on Easter about our plans for her spending a week in TN (fam moved there) and what we’d do in Maine. That night she sends me an insta video and I realize I’m out of the picture and lost it. That turns into her admitting later after I gave it time to cool off she doesn’t have feelings, but then said we’d call tomorrow. We never did
Next day she slowly starts removing everything and when she finally texts it’s just quick “I don’t want a relationship anymore” and I spiraled after this.
3.5 weeks later after that I finally got her to talk (over text again) and we had what I thought was a productive conversation about what happened. We agreed to talk again in two weeks and added each other back on insta. We talked ab a lot of stuff but a big thing was her not feeling comfortable with my family. And I said it was a bit harsh to use that as an excuse but unfortunately, I agreed my family while loving to her and me was a bit much. Led me to want to stay at my college in NC for a whole month in June because I resented everyone and everything for making me the way I am. I’m also autistic so my brain is stuck on this life I thought I was gonna have with her.
Ofc I text after two weeks and she says she never wants to speak to me again. And at first I went off for good and was okay. I went on a solo trip, I finally had another pics with friends to post there, and I even was happy to go home. I mailed the stuff back she didn’t want too and that felt so relieving. But idk what happened but this past week has destroyed me for no reason. I feel dead. I can’t get out of bed, I have no joy in anything, and the last couple days, I’ve started looking ups ways to end it all. I’ve realized that the pain I have is much worse than the pain of those who’d miss me. I’ve rlly started to actually consider how I would do it.
I’ve been depressed my whole life, but this is something I’ve never gone deep into. I was happy a week ago after she shut me down. I was happy the two weeks in between our texts when I finally found reason to work on myself. I was actually somewhat content with just being friends for that time I was praying for that bc I just needed good friends. And I have some of them, but everyone is so sick of hearing about her. I have nobody to talk to. And my parents got pissed when I mentioned how I felt earlier on bc my uncle took his life. But I can’t do this. My autism caused me so much social pain growing up. That girl was my escape from it all for YEARS and now it’s gone. And I don’t feel the same around my family anymore. The only thing I can do is cry and long for her back.
She would always say she loved me more all of these years and stuck by me through it all. But she made a friend in December and when I visited her they texted like crazy. And now she is visiting this female friend in June a 4.5 hour drive and she despises driving. I literally got replaced by a friend. She struggled socially like me but the second she met anyone to take the pain away, she leaves me and now is so happy because I was the one holding her back in life. It’s such delusion. When we briefly texted she said she cried bc she felt bad but who knows.
She has always had trouble facing things and speaking up, so this could be her way of not wanting to know my pain or get feelings for me again. I don’t even think she’s the one who texted the break up.
So I’m done. I hate my future. I hate my major. And I don’t enjoy my life anymore. Doing the things I love brings me pain. Is rehab an option idek what there is for that but I’m done. I could keep texting her but 50/50 chance that just goes to hell. I loved her like crazy and while she was suffering too, her escape was dumping me when I was the one who loved her the most and more than my family the past couple years. I can’t do this. Help.

I can’t do this
I (21 m) am 7 weeks post breakup and the pain is unbearable right now. I was dumped over text. We’ve been together since right before 11th grade (4.5 years) and she told me she felt compliant to me for 3.5 of them. I was controlling in some ways (so was she) but I also cared for her when nobody else did and We both were long distance for college and that was a strain but we also got so excited to see each other and I thought we had such fun every summer when I’d stay with her.
The day of the start of the breakup was Easter. Two weeks before she had seemed distant but played it off as that she was stressed about school. That was the first time I’d ever questioned anything. Our goodbye was still drawn out with lots of hugs and a long goodbye. Felt nothing abnormal as I drove back. We talked normal on Easter about our plans for her spending a week in TN (fam moved there) and what we’d do in Maine. That night she sends me an insta video and I realize I’m out of the picture and lost it. That turns into her admitting later after I gave it time to cool off she doesn’t have feelings, but then said we’d call tomorrow. We never did
Next day she slowly starts removing everything and when she finally texts it’s just quick “I don’t want a relationship anymore” and I spiraled after this.
3.5 weeks later after that I finally got her to talk (over text again) and we had what I thought was a productive conversation about what happened. We agreed to talk again in two weeks and added each other back on insta. We talked ab a lot of stuff but a big thing was her not feeling comfortable with my family. And I said it was a bit harsh to use that as an excuse but unfortunately, I agreed my family while loving to her and me was a bit much. Led me to want to stay at my college in NC for a whole month in June because I resented everyone and everything for making me the way I am. I’m also autistic so my brain is stuck on this life I thought I was gonna have with her.
Ofc I text after two weeks and she says she never wants to speak to me again. And at first I went off for good and was okay. I went on a solo trip, I finally had another pics with friends to post there, and I even was happy to go home. I mailed the stuff back she didn’t want too and that felt so relieving. But idk what happened but this past week has destroyed me for no reason. I feel dead. I can’t get out of bed, I have no joy in anything, and the last couple days, I’ve started looking ups ways to end it all. I’ve realized that the pain I have is much worse than the pain of those who’d miss me. I’ve rlly started to actually consider how I would do it.
I’ve been depressed my whole life, but this is something I’ve never gone deep into. I was happy a week ago after she shut me down. I was happy the two weeks in between our texts when I finally found reason to work on myself. I was actually somewhat content with just being friends for that time I was praying for that bc I just needed good friends. And I have some of them, but everyone is so sick of hearing about her. I have nobody to talk to. And my parents got pissed when I mentioned how I felt earlier on bc my uncle took his life. But I can’t do this. My autism caused me so much social pain growing up. That girl was my escape from it all for YEARS and now it’s gone. And I don’t feel the same around my family anymore. The only thing I can do is cry and long for her back.
She would always say she loved me more all of these years and stuck by me through it all. But she made a friend in December and when I visited her they texted like crazy. And now she is visiting this female friend in June a 4.5 hour drive and she despises driving. I literally got replaced by a friend. She struggled socially like me but the second she met anyone to take the pain away, she leaves me and now is so happy because I was the one holding her back in life. It’s such delusion. When we briefly texted she said she cried bc she felt bad but who knows.
She has always had trouble facing things and speaking up, so this could be her way of not wanting to know my pain or get feelings for me again. I don’t even think she’s the one who texted the break up.
So I’m done. I hate my future. I hate my major. And I don’t enjoy my life anymore. Doing the things I love brings me pain. Is rehab an option idek what there is for that but I’m done. I could keep texting her but 50/50 chance that just goes to hell. I loved her like crazy and while she was suffering too, her escape was dumping me when I was the one who loved her the most and more than my family the past couple years. I can’t do this. Help.

I (21 m) am 7 weeks post breakup and the pain is unbearable right now. I was dumped over text. We’ve been together since right before 11th grade (4.5 years) and she told me she felt compliant to me for 3.5 of them. I was controlling in some ways (so was she) but I also cared for her when nobody else did and We both were long distance for college and that was a strain but we also got so excited to see each other and I thought we had such fun every summer when I’d stay with her.
The day of the start of the breakup was Easter. Two weeks before she had seemed distant but played it off as that she was stressed about school. That was the first time I’d ever questioned anything. Our goodbye was still drawn out with lots of hugs and a long goodbye. Felt nothing abnormal as I drove back. We talked normal on Easter about our plans for her spending a week in TN (fam moved there) and what we’d do in Maine. That night she sends me an insta video and I realize I’m out of the picture and lost it. That turns into her admitting later after I gave it time to cool off she doesn’t have feelings, but then said we’d call tomorrow. We never did
Next day she slowly starts removing everything and when she finally texts it’s just quick “I don’t want a relationship anymore” and I spiraled after this.
3.5 weeks later after that I finally got her to talk (over text again) and we had what I thought was a productive conversation about what happened. We agreed to talk again in two weeks and added each other back on insta. We talked ab a lot of stuff but a big thing was her not feeling comfortable with my family. And I said it was a bit harsh to use that as an excuse but unfortunately, I agreed my family while loving to her and me was a bit much. Led me to want to stay at my college in NC for a whole month in June because I resented everyone and everything for making me the way I am. I’m also autistic so my brain is stuck on this life I thought I was gonna have with her.
Ofc I text after two weeks and she says she never wants to speak to me again. And at first I went off for good and was okay. I went on a solo trip, I finally had another pics with friends to post there, and I even was happy to go home. I mailed the stuff back she didn’t want too and that felt so relieving. But idk what happened but this past week has destroyed me for no reason. I feel dead. I can’t get out of bed, I have no joy in anything, and the last couple days, I’ve started looking ups ways to end it all. I’ve realized that the pain I have is much worse than the pain of those who’d miss me. I’ve rlly started to actually consider how I would do it.
I’ve been depressed my whole life, but this is something I’ve never gone deep into. I was happy a week ago after she shut me down. I was happy the two weeks in between our texts when I finally found reason to work on myself. I was actually somewhat content with just being friends for that time I was praying for that bc I just needed good friends. And I have some of them, but everyone is so sick of hearing about her. I have nobody to talk to. And my parents got pissed when I mentioned how I felt earlier on bc my uncle took his life. But I can’t do this. My autism caused me so much social pain growing up. That girl was my escape from it all for YEARS and now it’s gone. And I don’t feel the same around my family anymore. The only thing I can do is cry and long for her back.
She would always say she loved me more all of these years and stuck by me through it all. But she made a friend in December and when I visited her they texted like crazy. And now she is visiting this female friend in June a 4.5 hour drive and she despises driving. I literally got replaced by a friend. She struggled socially like me but the second she met anyone to take the pain away, she leaves me and now is so happy because I was the one holding her back in life. It’s such delusion. When we briefly texted she said she cried bc she felt bad but who knows.
She has always had trouble facing things and speaking up, so this could be her way of not wanting to know my pain or get feelings for me again. I don’t even think she’s the one who texted the break up.
So I’m done. I hate my future. I hate my major. And I don’t enjoy my life anymore. Doing the things I love brings me pain. Is rehab an option idek what there is for that but I’m done. I could keep texting her but 50/50 chance that just goes to hell. I loved her like crazy and while she was suffering too, her escape was dumping me when I was the one who loved her the most and more than my family the past couple years. I can’t do this. Help.

My Mom is a terrible person. I can say that definitively. And I have stopped communicating with her completely. I did not wish her a happy mother's day and she is blocked.
On Easter a good friend died. I am still grieving. She decided to give me one day of sympathy and then ripped into me because I wanted to follow his directives. She was mad I didn't settle the estate myself.
She sent me awful text messages saying I was squandering his money. And then refused to see my child for a pre-planned event when I said I wouldn't attend but would be happy to bring the child and then take the dog for a walk.
She can grind me into the ground and I don't care. But mess with my kid and you are dead to me.
She's going to be 80 in June. She's lived too long and taken too much happiness from the world for herself.
The good really do die young.

Have you guys ever used Chrome's "inspect" feature?(I assume it's a chrome thing but maybe it's in other browsers too?) I discovered it years ago. I was sitting in a middle school math class, and we were doing work on a website called IXL, where you had to do problems for like 20 minutes. I must have accidentally right-clicked, and then noticed the "Inspect" option at the bottom of the toolbar. It was pretty exciting to discover. I was pretty bored at the moment(probably stuck on a math problem), so it was pretty fun to play around with. All I could really figure out was how to change text to say different things and change the dimensions of certain images. The best part was that IXL had a timer that kept track of how long you'd been working. So in theory(never had the guts to actually do it), you could change the time to say you'd met the time requirement and then you'd be done.
I always loved showing off cool easter eggs and keyboard shortcuts to my friends, so this was definitely a new favorite. At some point they(the school) must have caught on, because the option was blocked from our computers at some point. Today I remembered it was a thing so I've had fun messing around with it again.
I'd be interested to hear if people actually use this, what its intended purpose is, what you can do with it, etc. I know Google built an entire text adventure game inside it at some point.

My (ex)fiancé and I had been together for almost 6.5 years, engaged for almost 2.5. Over the last several months, my (ex)fiancé has sat me down to talk about our relationship about once a month. Before these conversations, he would shut down and barely speak to me for several days even when I would ask what was wrong. Then he would finally tell me he was ready to have a conversation and would express his frustrations with the relationship. By the time of our conversations, I would already be on the defensive from his recent behavior. I also generally do not receive feedback well. When he would try to tell me that he was unhappy in our relationship because I didn't compliment him enough, flirt with him enough, or tell him I loved him enough, I would shut down. I was not able to hear what he was really trying to tell me. Instead, I put up a wall and told him to love me for who I am. I basically asked him "If I'm happy in our relationship despite my frustrations, why can't you be?" I now realize that is not an appropriate or healthy response when your partner is trying to communicate with you.
I did try to hear him. I gifted him some lingerie for the first time and let him take a boudoir photo shoot of me wearing it. I started sending a few more cute messages. I tried to make more time to cuddle with him when he would ask. I tried to give him more hugs. I tried to thank him more for picking up around the house. I wrote him a cute letter and surprised him with a few gifts for Easter. However, about a month ago, we had another one of those conversations. Except this time the first things he brought up were 'wondering what else is out there' and talking about how other girls are always complimenting him. Again came the walls and extra defensiveness. I ended up writing him a letter talking about how I didn't know if I could ever be what he wanted me to be and that maybe he should think about calling things off. This was obviously a defense mechanism to try to beat him to the punch line and talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy. Three weeks later he would sit me down and tell me he wanted to know what else was out there again and that he didn't know if he could go through with marrying me. My efforts did not feel like enough for him and I understand why. I was having a hard time connecting my emotions with my actions which made my actions seem reactionary and not genuine or provoked by love.
I have been through a lot more trauma in my life than I realized. My dad was in the Navy while I was growing up. We had to move every three years. A very pivotal point in my life was when we moved when I was in the 6th grade. I lived right next door to my best friend. I was finding my love for math and theater. I also played soccer and was a Girl Scout. When we moved, I became very depressed, though I didn't understand that's what it was at the time. I stopped all of my extracurricular activities. I stopped getting too close to people because I knew I would have to move or they would have to move eventually. I mostly stayed in my room and kept to myself, even from my family. I also have struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. Then, in my senior year of high school, I got my first-ever boyfriend. We were in a relationship for over 4 years. In that relationship, I would always be the one to try to talk about our problems. I would be the one who would always want longer hugs and more cuddles. But it was not a healthy relationship. We broke up and got back together many times. I found several illicit texts to other girls on multiple occasions and he would always gaslight me by saying his younger brother stole his phone or I misinterpreted the messages. I think this caused me not to want to show my emotions because it wasn't reciprocated and resulted in heartache. Then, three years ago my younger brother died in a tragic car accident at the age of 17.
When I realized I could lose the love of my life, I realized that he was right about me not being affectionate enough. I had built up walls to protect myself. I thought I had made progress on my anxiety and depression, but I realized I was wrong. I also realized that I have issues with communication, trust, and vulnerability. I was a great partner in other ways and I did express my love in other ways. I moved across the country, coast to coast, with him to a state where I didn't know anyone so that he could attend his dream school. I take care of the household. I get the majority of the groceries. I do all of the cooking. I do all of the maintenance cleaning. I take care of our 2 cats and 1 dog. I say all of those in the present tense because we currently still live together but are sleeping in separate rooms. I also financially supported him by lending him money and letting him pay less of the rent because I made more money. I accept all of him including that he has terrible time management skills, he can have a hard time controlling his emotions at times, and he is disorganized and messy. I also accepted that I would have to wait for marriage and children because of his school and accepted that he did not have a lot of free time between school, work, and his hobbies. I supported his love for his hobbies by accepting his purchasing of expensive equipment even when he owed me money, traveling to watch several events that were important to him, and traveling to see him win an award from his job. I would write heartfelt cards for every holiday. I also bought him dozens of children's books about love that I wanted us to read to our children one day.
When I realized I could lose him, I felt something change inside me. It was like I could feel a hole being blown in the wall I had built up. I felt all my love for him overwhelm me. I couldn't hug him, kiss him, or tell him I love him enough. I tried to talk to him to apologize for my behavior and how badly I'd hurt him. I tried to explain how I felt like a different person and how I really wanted to work hard on improving myself as a partner to make our relationship work. I tried to prove my words with actions. I wrote a list of things I needed to work on including communication and being more affectionate. I also wrote out a list of ways to work on those things and actually started doing the things on the list. Some of the items I had already begun to do like hug and kiss him more and tell him I love him more. I also tried to ask more questions about his interests/hobbies/day. I was more vulnerable and talked with him about my feelings more. I even initiated intimacy, something I had really only done once in a blue moon when I was intoxicated. I also set up my individual therapy sessions.
Despite all of my efforts, over the next two weeks, he continued to say he did not know if he could be with me and wanted to know what else was out there. He was very wavering and said multiple times "I don't know what the right decision is." He said he could not trust that my changes would last and that it was probably too late. I begged him to try couples therapy, but he refused and said "Therapy takes too long" and basically said it wasn't worth the time. He finally broke up with me after 2 weeks of going back and forth and I was devastated. He later talked to a mutual friend of ours and changed his mind about therapy. I was so happy to hear that he had changed his mind. However, now I feel like I can't even trust him anymore. He's turning into a person I don't recognize and I don't know what he's capable of anymore. I don't know if the man I love still exists. When he told me he was now agreeable to try therapy he said "We're still broken up, but I won't talk to any other girls." and then promptly said "And it will give me more time to find a place to live if things don't work out." He deleted several Instagram posts that had photos of me after he agreed to try therapy which makes me think he's not actually that open to healing our relationship. He complained to me about how he might have to take out student loans after I told him he needed to pay me for half of the rent while we're broken up and not decreased rate he had been paying me. He also "checked on me" on the night of the 3rd year anniversary of my brother's death when he heard me crying. Then he just sat on the end of the bed scrolling his phone while I cried as if he was checking on me because he felt like he had to and not because he wanted to. When I asked him if he had some sort of deadline in mind for the therapy, because he had previously mentioned that it takes too long, he said July or August and I have a suspicion that is because a girl he likes is leaving for summer break but will be back at the end of August for the next semester.
I just feel like the way he has been acting is not how you act towards someone you were in a relationship with for almost 6.5 years. Especially after saying you still love them and have no negative feelings towards them. That means even though you don't think you are a good relationship match, you should still want to treat them with respect. You should care that they are hurting during this time. You should want to comfort them in their grief of a separate event. You should mean it if you say you want to try therapy.
TL; DR : Do you think therapy will help?

I was just looking for easter eggs and thought of the song above called "Stayed Gone". I looked through glitches in Vox's "Buffering" and found the current with text on the in a dramatic voice THE BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH - DEAth - Death - eath - th - h - ...
The text: (The "_"s mean the word cant be read)
THE PROBLEM SEEMS TO BE CAUSED BY THE FOLLOWING FILE : ALASTOR.EXE
VOX.EXE_CRASH_ERROR_EAT_SHIT_ALASTOR
CHECK TO MAKE SURE _____ ___ ____ _____ HARDWARE AND SOFTWARE IS UP TO DATE AND PROPERLY INSTALLED. ASK VOX FOR ANY VOXTEX _____ ___ __ ____ NEED.
IF THIS PROBLEM CONTINUES, (FUCK YOU ALASTOR) DISABLE OR MOVE ANY ALASTOR[S] ___ THE GENERAL VICINITY. IF YOU NEED TO USE "UNSAFE MODE" RESET YOUR VOXTEX DEVICE, PRESS F5, AND SELECT "ADVANCED STARTUP OPTIONS" THEN SELECT "UNSAFE MODE"
TECHNICAL INFORMATION:

This is a slightly meandering story. Sorry for the length.
Our daughter - call her Jillian - (38F) got re-married two years ago to, say, Joe (40M). His mother is what I call a "sheeple". She worships the ground a certain Republican walks on. Now we're Republican, but very liberal and I despise this certain 'politician'. Joe warned his mother before we met NOT to bring up politics. We went out to dinner to meet, having a lovely time, then MIL to be starts talking politics. I get up and excuse myself to the restroom. This happened several times, and I always handled it basically the same way. Removing myself from the room.
As an aside, I should mention that I was mobile then. Now I use a rollatewalker because I need a hip replacement and have for several years.
Finally the Thanksgiving before the wedding, I reached my limit. I was in pain and AGAIN MIL to be brings up some case that highlighted gun use. I got up snapped at her something in opposition to what she was saying and starting to "roll" off. She sneered and said I must be a liberal snowflake. My response was that I was a Liberal Republican who believed in women's rights & gay rights. Then I literally told hubby "we're leaving" and stormed out as best I could.
Wedding came, and everything went smooth. MIL sat next to me, we chatted, we were polite. No politics. I thought everything was fine. Though MIL got to sit at head table and we did not. We sat in first table with other family members.
Holidays come around again and we get a phone call from Jillian. We're no longer going to have holidays with her and Joe because they can't put me and MIL together and MIL is single (been divorced for decades), while hubby and I have each other. I was hurt and said it wasn't fair. She has a son from her first marriage - our only grandchiold - and he lives in another state with his father. So we only see him during summer months and a few holidays each year. Jillian decided to compromise. Since her son would be with his Dad at Christmas, she had Easter the following year (2024). She would have us over for Easter,, but MIL would get Thanksgiving. Okay, that sounds fine.
A month before Easter we get a call that our niece and her family would be travelling home from Disney World and spending the Easter weekend with Jillian and Joe. Their house would be too crowded (7 total w/o us), therefore we wouldn't be allowed to spend Easter with them. I wanted to see my niece and her family too. "Maybe you can go out to dinner while they're here." I blew up, I admit it. She has cut us off once before from grandson (don't even remember why), when we ask to be invited to outings with grandson she tells us that it's too difficult for me or I would slow them down. We paid for parts of their wedding, I've given her money when married to first husband to help them out. I have an elderly father in our hometown that she keeps promising to take grandson to visit (he's only met him once and never met Joe), but always has an excuse.
Finally I threw my hands up and have washed them of her. She did send me a text wishing me a "Happy Birthday" last month, but I ignored it. Nothing for Mother's Day. None of us have blocked the others on SM. I just don't want anything to do with her anymore, grandson or not. I'm tired of swallowing my thoughts & feelings so we woudn't be cut off from him. So if we have to lose him too, at this point, so be it. My father is not going to be around many more years and I don't want them at the funeral, either. If she can't be bothered to visit him while he's alive, then don't visit when he passes.
So are WTA in overreacting and should we reach out?

Not really a master thesis just my notes from the second half of all the dfv memes watched from oldest to newest.
These notes come from watching every ppshow of the week and taking my favorite bits of tinfoil from the community into one fairly simple look into the story dfv is telling us without getting too deep on possible tinfoil, it’s just laid out plain and simple here.
Tldr; this is a very long post. I made notes about the last 30 minutes of the compilation and it feels very bullish.
Edit:
I think all the memes are separate little stories that all tie in together. It doesn’t necessarily have to be like a movie forwards or backwards. The meaning of each one is pretty clear on the surface and then there’s little Easter eggs deep in the tinfoil but I don’t think we need to watch it like a movie to get it even though there is extra context when you watch a few together.
I went back to his page and just been watching them one at a time and they’re epic. He’s just loaded us up with an arsenal of memes to repost whenever we’re feeling jacked on our journey and given us the vibe and the tinfoil that we’re definitely about to fucking win.
Here goes:
(I’ll add my notes for the first 30 minutes soon.)
About 30 minutes in someone asks, “where you been”, he says “waiting”, what about getting caught? “All part of the plan.”
Then there’s usual suspects movie with the goofy meme “I’ll fuckin do it again”.
——
Jake texting Keith, hilarious (is this about our Jake2b and the story PP had about accidentally going to a gay bar around the first pulte event? So funny with the guy with 600 memes and basically joking that he became a full blown psycho with the memes.
Tell me where the freaks at - epic pump up music. (Psyched on us? Finding other freaks to vibe with.)
Guy looks out the window, then the Teddy in a chair (might have just been a response to Cramer being a smartass). Then Hank (Jim Carrey) starts to lose it as the stock price keeps going down, his alter ego comes out.
Truman show, he’s trying to escape, they say “he’ll turn back he’s too afraid”. They hit him with everything they’ve got but he knows it’s all fake. He says, “is that the best you can do??” (I think this is clearly about fake price movement, trying to keep us trapped in the illusion)
“Fury is a game where every boss fight feels like the final boss. They taunt you, they demand you get back in your prison cell, they pound you into a pulp and they even make you doubt the righteousness of your own quest towards freedom. But the soundtrack man, it keeps egging you on. To whoop some ass!” PP theme music drops. Holy shit.
(This one is obviously talking about us, I cried because I was so happy when I heard this one)
——
The Bullet one talking about time, cause and effect, “don’t try to understand it, just feel it”. “Instinct, got it.”
Morpheus teaching neo it’s all fake. Just before that scene he says, “you think that’s air you’re breathing?” … “Again!”
Alice says “But I don’t want to go among mad people.” The cat replies, “Most everyone’s mad here. You may have noticed I’m not all there myself.” Neo waking up again in the 4th movie.
Alice going down a rabbit hole into wonderland.. psychedelic music and dancing. (That’s us going down the rabbit hole thinking we’ve gone mad but loving every minute of it.)
Next scene guy running and falls over, music says “I lost myself.”
Shawshank, they find the tunnel he made. In 2021 Kitty escaped prison. All they found of him was some Reddit posts, tweets, and an old live stream. Investing is the study of pressure and time. That’s all it takes really, pressure and time. That and a keen goddamn activist.
A man will do anything to keep his mind busy in prison. Turns out kittys favorite activity was handing out memes, a handful at a time (the dirt for the tunnel and the tinfoil that’s helped us dig our way to freedom). Kitty did as he was told, buffed that financial education to a high mirror shine. (I think he’s been getting ready for something big and these memes are just a countdown.)
Bruce Willis. “No, THIS is the Kansas City shuffle.” (An advanced form of confidence trick where the mark is aware of being involved in a swindle and believes that he or she can outsmart the swindler; however, this is all part of the trick, and by attempting to retaliate, the mark unwittingly assists the con artist.) Hedge funds are the mark and dfv/rc are playing a con, the bear trap?
——
Pay attention to what I say, I choose my words carefully and I never repeat myself. The cat looks at the camera.
Michael from the office - It’s Britney bitch. And I am back. Cut to Britney Spears - I must confess I still believe. When I’m not with you I lose my mind. Give me a sign (like how we’re always asking for a sign?? (with the alien g from signs all red like a gme logo giving birth). Hit me BABY one more time!
Goosebumps all the papers fly out of the briefcase right when we get like 200 new dockets clawing back money from 90 days before bbby bk. Bear beware… you’re in for a scare…
Then it’s Abbi from Broad city dancing all over the place and she’s obsessed with bed bath and beyond in the show. There’s also the scene where the other girl is dancing behind a colored blanket with the same logo as HBC and then the next scene she’s tied up. Then they’re dancing again.. and naked then then only in shorts. Naked shorts?
We’ll never survive unless we’re a little crazy. The modern investor unleashes the animal within to take on the big city - that’s gotta be us apes?
What kind of person are you? The kind that sees signs, sees miracles? Or do you believe that people just get lucky? Is it possible that there are no coincidences? The kid holds up a baby monitor. They find a crop circle and it’s two GameStop logos turned in different directions (maybe rc turned GameStop around) and then another one with a long line and a baby gme logo (is gme about to have a baby?!)
Why make something disposable like an investment thesis when you can make something that lasts forever, like a GameStop meme? (It says “Reality” at the bottom of this clip, lol)
Jack Nicholson in the shining (music playing it’s just a matter of time before I lose my mind it’s also a place in ready player one where they have to take the leap not taken, the leap of faith, a kiss). “Make a lot of memes today?” Lol
Can’t stop what’s coming. Kicks some ass.
——
I got both hands off the wheel, the cops are coming. I listen to the music with no fear, you can hear it too if you’re sincere. Cuz I’m a punk rocker yes I am. (song: punkrocker by the teddybears)
Rock ain’t about doing things prefect! Who can tell me what it’s really about? Sticking it to the man! If you wanna rock, you gotta break the rules.
Two cars racing, one plays chicken with a truck and then cut to bojack horseman talking on stage right before they almost crash (stalking horse? Looks just like he horse from 1, 2 switch that GameStop tweeted the minute the stalking horse deadline was up.)
Now you may only see a pile of boring forms and numbers, but I see a story (us going through the dd and maybe holly etlin talking about there’s a story here but it’s not mine to tell)
Listen to this song, it’ll change your life.
(Song is don’t fear the reaper - so don’t be afraid of death, funny because of the cowbell, maybe cowbell is involved in the tinfoil but at the end of the song lyrics not shown in the clip they say: don't be afraid, Come on, baby (and she had no fear) And she ran to him (then they started to fly) They looked backward and said goodbye)
Big Lebowski dude is investigating and finds the drawing of Jackie tree horn and it’s just a guy with a raging erection with the name cohen at the top of the paper. (I think this means rc is ready to fuck)
Jason borne is telling the run Lola run chick he can’t run with her, he has to be careful because people are after him. He says I gotta figure it out. She says well then figure it out. They drive into a parking garage through the wrong way (where it should say exit it says exit strategy and he enters through the exit, parks and walks away, as in “what’s an exit strategy”)
Then it looks like maybe him and rc just waiting and dealing with some bs.
Then there’s the Backstage roaring cat perhaps. The girl says ima stick beside him.
Not sure about everyone shooting each other but someone said maybe because he wrote it and manifested it?
——
Then the dress one “this is art, get it?” Was apparently two minutes after hey Ross and some others were talking about that dress on a space call.
I’m a United States gamestop memer. Aren’t those the guys that go crazy and come back with an arsenal of memes and blast everybody? Sometimes. Price action keeps coming and coming… and then it’s GameStop earnings week! (6/5 aftermarket)
Always sunny scene maybe like a peek into how crazy he’s been feeling not being able to talk to anyone for three years?
He can’t speak or he’ll get in trouble.
Alladin scene (alladin name of trading algo. He also says next time I’ll use a nom de plume - pen name) all I gotta do is jump! (The theme of taking a leap of faith again)
Dreyfus billionaire family (no idea but she’s dancing having a great time)
You can’t handle the truth (code red has to do with a worm/virus, maybe they’re about to unleash something that destroys several companies that are short? And it’s pretty funny)
Beavis and butthead sex for dummies (to me it says rc and dfv are ready to fuck but also cex means centralized exchanges which are also for dummies)
Oceans 11, (theme is a heist. We’re all looking at each other like what’s about to happen and then the last guy is just looking at boobs, seems to describe a group like us lol)
Bernard from westworld can’t see the bear thesis (because in the movie he’s programmed not to but irl it’s because there isn’t a thesis!)
“That’s not a thesis,” pulls out huge knife, “that’s a thesis.”
The gme galaxy on the cat collar says deepfuckingvalue so I think he’s saying it’s still deep value and we often made memes about the black hole of gme absorbing the rest of the market into it so maybe that’s it.
Whats in the box? What’s in the box??? (What’s the plan??? RC not telegraphing his plans)
Guy looks at all the memes - she asks “is it not good?” “It is miraculous.” (That’s us loving every second of this. Thank you dfv.)
And so.. you just RAN. Forest gump runnin’ (gme gonna just keep runnin’)
you go backwards but then you go forwards again… you go backwards… then he walks out of the woods.. (are we out of the woods now? Done going backwards?)
We’ll see. The Zen philosophy story - kid breaks leg, oh that’s bad, can’t go to war, oh now it’s good etc - (I think he’s saying to be zen, we’re gonna win, but this message goes deeper:
We don’t always know what is good or bad. Breaking your leg isn’t good or bad, those are just judgements in our mind. We don’t know what the future holds. Almost anything can be a good thing or a bad thing, all we can do is accept life and how things play out without judgement.)
We’ll see.
Then the boy is saying bye to ET, the music says I’ve really enjoyed my stay, but I must be movin on. (DFV going silent again until this all plays out.)
——
——
He’s saying “we fuckin won fellas! Be zen, and we’ll see this all play out soon enough.”
I think the heavy use of good movies and music and video games may also be hinting at gamestops nft marketplace May reopen to sell those 3 things as NFTs by partnering with blockbuster and some musicians.
LFG 🚀 I’ll see you regards on the moon.

I estranged from my parents almost 7 years ago. In that time, an aunt, who has also been estranged from my parents, has come back into my life. It started with convos on Messenger about 3 years ago to texts and emails, never phone calls. It helped to have someone else who had a different perspective explain why my parents were so weird, and that it hadn't been just me.
When I first told her I had estranged, she told me, "I will be your mom." I told her that wasn't what I wanted, I just wanted family I could talk with. She seemed to understand, but in the past 6 months, she has started being kind of creepy and pushy. Like around Thanksgiving, talking about it would be better when would all be together to celebrate. Same at Christmas. Didn't even text me at Easter except to ask if I had PTO to use. I have made it very clear that I don't want to go back there. She lives near my parents, and my brother actually moved not that far from her. I don't want to drive 9 hours to sit in a house I haven't been in for 20+ years, afraid to go outside or have it get back to my parents that I visited her and not them. I don't want to see them but I don't want to do things that will actively rub salt in the wound like that.
My SO seems to think my aunt is trying to use me as a replacement for her trans son. She never really has accepted his choices since he transitioned (cousin's words), and he's even told me how my aunt cried about not getting to do the "mother daughter wedding plans." SO and I are planning to get married and he wonders if that is tripping my aunt out.
Just today, I got a barrage of texts and then phone calls all before 8:30 AM. I had been sleeping, I have that awful stomach bug and I'm up half the night with it. The texts are just this panic "are you ok? I haven't heard from you. I'm worried. Please pick up." Type of dramatics. I put my phone on silent and went back to sleep until just about an hour ago (noon). 16 more messages and 8 missed calls. She's saying she's calling the cops if she doesn't hear from me today on a wellness check. SO was already outside working, I went out and showed him. He seems to think she is starting to show her narc side too. I last texted her at Easter. We don't text much at all since she started pushing about "being my mom" and us visiting. It has been a month. SO texted her that I'm fighting a bug and work has been extra busy, and we have been busy after work with the usual spring outdoors work. And that if anything was wrong with me, he would make sure to let her know.
She just texted me that she got a message from SO that I'm fine but she wants to hear it from me. I'm about to go off on her. Before I do, any insight? Is this a narc revealing herself or just a psychotic episode? Either way, a solid boundary is going up today.
Thanks.

During Christmas every year my wife’s side of the family hosts a big family dinner. Her side is very big and there house really isn’t the biggest. Every year my kids have to sit on the floor, the couch, or in a bed in a room. There’s never opened seats at the table for them. During the Christmas dinner, my kids were complaining that the cats that they own were coming up to them while they were eating. My daughter is allergic when in contact with cats so my wife asked if it was okay if she shut the door while they ate in the bedroom. Her mom got mad and said No and that she would be fine. About 2 minutes later 2 of my kids came to me with their plates and both of them had cat hair in the plates. My daughter was freaked out as she has apparently aten it but realized while chewing it was there. I told my wife’s family if there was not enough spots at the table then we were not gonna come for family dinners like this one unless it was summer and my kids could eat outside. We then left and went home. We didn’t go back for easter, but when the first summer family gathering came around we got a text in the family group chat about it. We headed out there and when we walked in we got hit with a ton of rude comments and remarks. They then proceeded to tell us to leave or they would call the cops. This was about 4 days ago and we left right after they made that statement. My daughters are upset they couldn’t see there cousins. But I have been wondering, AITAH for leaving during the middle of Christmas dinner?

let's start fron the beginning. I (17m) have always had only a few friends, thanks to my social anxiety. I don't remeber how but the last year I started going out with more people even though they were mostly my friends, but still managed to have a friend group of 7 people (still a lot, considering my social anxiety and the fact that we live in a really small town, like 2k inhabitants). But things got worse during august, we started being a smaller and smaller group, until in november we went from seven to three. I tried fixing the situation even though I only knew that one of my friend had an argument with everyone else and always blamed the girls in the group and started hating everyone that wasn't me and the other guy, but never actually told what happened He (17m) always had family issues, his twin brother is physically and mentaly disabled, his dad is an alcoholic and got divorced a few years ago, so his mother started dating another man in february. They started going out with their respective offspring, so we went from three to two even though we kept texting, beacuse he used to go out with his mother and stepfather every saturday evening (the only time we are able to do something during the school period) and that went on for 6/7 weeks, except fpr one time. Easter came, and here in Italy we have a week off school, and we always used to meet almost every day during this week-off, but this year it didn't happened except for the first two days. So I got annoyed of this situation and I told my other friend (18m) that maybe we could get the group together because it was becoming boring to go out only So I did one of the hardest things in my life: ask to almost every person in the group (except for one guy, but I asked him few weeks later, I'll explain later why) if they wanted to go out like we used to do. I thought they would have refused, expecially one girl, because we never texted to much, beacuseshe was my crush for the entire last year and was always ashemed to text her (It's a weird behaviour, i know), and when the group fell apart we stopped texting. Surprisingly for me they all accepted. But that one friend after almosttwo months of going out only with his stepdad and stepsibling, asked us two if we wanted to go out. I explained to him the situation and it seemed he was about to get mad, but thenbacted like that didn't happen. The next week in our town there was a festival, and I again asked to the old group to go out, because that one guy always told me that he wanted to buy a new pc, so he wouldn't go out during this festival. But he did and this time he actually got mad and stopped texting and talking to me. This happened during april so we went out again only a few times because the others always had something to study, but still managed to find someone in the group that was free to go out. Then we asked the remaining guy to go out with us (we waited because he argued with the two remaing friends, including the one that was with me when I aked out the old group, one month before the group completely fell apart). He actually explained me what actually happened: he argued with them because the guy with family issues (at this point I'll call him joe, because it's getting confusing) was being mean to him. He then also explained that joe had a crush on the same girl I had mine, and started to be suffocating, and possesive so she cut him off and that resulted in the situation i described. Joe also texted me to taun me, to tell me I was an asshole, a bad friend and some shit like that, but I decided to ignore him. This made me feel guilty and even more insecure about myself and my group of friends AITA for cutting him off? (sorry for my bad english, I often make mistakes and I don't want this post to be incomprehensible or too confusing)

I must say that Craft is quite pleasant for me, as it is a joyful process.
However, the latest big update has brought some issues for me. I am wondering if it has a better design. Does anyone else have the same problem as me?
Calendar Note
In the previous version, we can see a fully expanded calendar in the navigation rail, I can jump to any date that I want to. for now, I need: 1. tap calendar 2. find the very not obviously date switch component 3. click it 4. choose a date
Hornesly I am not quite sure it is a better user flow to navigate to a date. I usually use quick notes to write the minutes and leave them on the date. Now I need to make more effort to find it.
All doc and & Home
When I create new documents, I can't find them in my home tab. I always wonder if I really created a new document or not, and where to find it. I can find the document in "All Docs" but not in the recent tab on the home screen. This is really frustrating for me.
Focus Mode
I don't understand why the designer hid the focus mode in a dropdown option. If it's not important anymore, please just remove it. But I do like it.
I'm a product designer and I was confused when the focus mode was hidden for the first time. I don't think new users and most people will know how to find it. Now it looks like an easter egg.
Select a block or just text
Craft has a unique behavior. When the user clicks on a sentence, it doesn't enter a text editing status; instead, it selects the block. This behavior is unexpected almost every time and I still can't get used to it. This behavior forces me to click twice to edit text, which is a little annoying.
AI is dump and limited
Craft is designed for writing a document, particularly a long article. However, the functionality of the Craft assistant appears to be very limited. Every time I ask it to summarize or rewrite something, it only provides a partial sentence and then stops. As a result, I have stopped using it altogether.
After All...
I won't stop using Craft until there's something much better, but there are rumors that the Apple Note app will have a big update and redesign, including an AI assistant. I believe it will be much more useful than the Craft assistant. At that point, Craft might just become a blogging app for me, and I won't take notes in Craft anymore. I really hope it can improve.