This is the FULL plan from my naturopath and has a 2-3 month recovery time frame but must be stuck to strictly. Sharing this for anyone who cannot afford these expensive appointments (although I must say the VCS tests are only $15 in Australia)
I have been rendered bed bound, I’ve had memory loss, sinus congestion, forgetfulness, deep depression, chronic fatigue, sensitivity to light, twitches and involuntary movements, heart flutters, vertigo, loss of motivation, bloating and puffy dark circles.
The PROTOCOL

• CUT OUT Gluten, Dairy & Sugar - a lot of us with mould illness have SIBO
• No coffee but use Matcha or green tea
• 2-3 litres of water a day
• Invest in an Air Purifier with HEPA filter and a dehumidifier to keep humidity below 60.

Mornings - On an empty stomach take 3-4 pumps of liposomal glutathione (the holy grail for healing !!!)

• 3,000 mg of vitamin c, 2 x vitamin D capsules and 1 x Zinc tablet
• Juice with Beetroot, Orange and Kale to flush the liver and aid in removing the mycotoxins daily and you need plenty of SULFUR rich vegetables to heal
• Add L Glutamine to your smoothies to aid in repairing your gut - mould ruins your gut.

Evenings - Take Zeolite before bed (this removes the mycotoxins from the liver) mild detox symptoms can happen such as nausea

• Grounding in nature (30 min a day) get your feet onto the grass, sunlight in mornings and go on YouTube and use this to heal (listen daily) see below ⬇️

https://youtu.be/2kxRi-ZmogI?si=UHPNy-1VgoEd-oLL
Other tips I did to heal : If you cannot move home - make your bedroom your safe haven, air purifier and get your carpets cleaned use an oil burner and burn oregano oil and peppermint oil to kill mould in the air

• Clean every other day with white vinegar mixed with clove oil and a microvfibre cloth
• Keep windows open in day for proper ventilation
• Get carpets sampled for mould - not that expensive
• Wash any clothes with clove oil (2/3 drops and tea tree oil 2/3 and wash 60 degrees then dry in the sun )
• Check your air vents and get the filters replaced yearly
• Epsom salt baths
• Colonic hydrotherapy
• I stopped drinking
• Castor oil packs on my tummy and oregano oil on the bottom of my feet at night then wear socks over the top (this is from reflexology) this is to draw out any fungus / mycotoxins
  
• Get a lymphatic drainage massage or use sauna and body brushing, take an anti histamine before bed and use saline nasal spray.
  

If you can - stay with friends or family or get fresh air daily to minimise exposure
You are not alone, you can heal and recover. Be patient and one day at a time, a lot of people don’t understand how teeth pulling this experience is but have faith - you will get there. ❤️‍🩹

I am 50yo male with cardiac disease (heart attack and stent in Feb ‘21) and diabetes (insulin dependent). I’ve been diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer. It has metastasized to my liver, peritoneal cavity, lymph nodes, and a very small possible tumor on my right lung. The largest tumor in my colon is a 3.5cm adenocarcinoma in my ascending colon. With several other varying size tumors throughout the rest of my colon. There are numerous tumors in my liver. Largest being 6cm in the Caudet lobe and 5cm in the right lobe. There are so many lymph nodes that are lighting up on the PET scan I can’t even name them all. The one on my lung showed mild activity on the scan and I guess that’s good. I’ve been getting sweats, chills, fevers, and non stop pain. I’m waiting for the oncology team to schedule me. I’m a vet, and the VA is sending me to a private hospital. I wanted to ask others for some advice for when I do meet with them. The GI doctor who did the biopsy was great and offered as much as they could. They were pretty certain that chemotherapy was going to be needed to shrink the tumors before surgery would be an option. But I figured asking those who are fighting the fight for some battle advice would be the best way to go. Thank you for anything you can offer.

Hey I am not looking for medical advice just if anyone has gone through similar. I have a colonoscopy already scheduled for Monday. Not sure if this is the right place to.post this or where I should post it.
I have been having a lot of blood tinged mucusy wet farts for a month now when on the toilet thinking I have to go. And today loud sounds coming from my stomach. Really nervous about what's going on. As UC, colon cancer and Crohns runs in my family. I am 40f and trying to be proactive. I've been under a lot of stress lately.. idk if that can mess with anything. Also nervous about the prep as I have pots so I gotta make sure I'm extra hydrated. Really scared it's CC.
I think the only thing helping me is the fact 2 years ago I had a ct scan of chest, pelvis and abdomen and nothing was found besides my liver being on the higher end of normal for size but no masses or anything. Can CC grow that fast? I know it probably depends on my body.

Namodenoson showed efficacy in pre-clinical models via a definitive molecular mechanism of action
Can-Fite BioPharma Ltd. (NYSE American: CANF) (TASE: CANF), a biotechnology company advancing a pipeline of proprietary small molecule drugs that address oncological and inflammatory diseases, today announced that it received an approval from the Institutional Review Board (IRB) of Rabin Medical Center, a leading medical institution in Israel where the study will be conducted. The approved protocol has been submitted now to the Ministry of Health (MOH).
“This Phase IIa study is designed as an open-label one, enabling us to assess the safety and potential efficacy of Namodenoson in pancreatic cancer patients whose disease has progressed despite first-line treatment. Our positive Namodenoson data in pancreatic carcinoma experimental models together with the positive data in the Phase II advanced liver cancer study, with a patient showing overall survival of >7 years, encouraged us to initiate the current Phase IIa study,” stated Can-Fite’s Medical Director Dr. Michael Silverman.
The protocol of the clinical study is CF102-222PC entitled: “A Phase II Open-Label Study of the Safety and Activity of Namodenoson in the Treatment of Advanced Pancreatic Adenocarcinoma,” ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier: NCT06387342.
The study is a multicenter open-label trial in patients with advanced pancreatic adenocarcinoma whose disease has progressed on at least first line therapy or who refuse standard treatment. The trial will evaluate the safety, clinical activity, and pharmacokinetics (PK) of Namodenoson in this population. All patients will receive oral Namodenoson 25 mg administered twice daily for consecutive 28-day cycles. Patients will be evaluated regularly for safety. Approximately 20 evaluable patients will be enrolled. The primary objective of this trial is to characterize the safety profile of Namodenoson and the secondary objective is to evaluate the clinical activity as determined by the Objective Response Rate (ORR) using Response Evaluation Criteria in Solid Tumors (RECIST 1.1), Progression-Free Survival (PFS), Disease Control Rate (DCR), Duration of Response (DoR), and Overall Survival (OS).
The study will be conducted by Dr. Salomon Stemmer, a leading key opinion leader, at the Institute of Oncology, Rabin Medical Center, Israel.
Namodenoson recently received peer-reviewed recognition for its efficacy findings in pancreatic cancer including from the American Association of Cancer Research (AACR) which accepted Can-Fite’s study titled "Namodenoson Inhibits the Growth of Pancreatic Carcinoma via De-regulation of the Wnt/β-catenin Signaling Pathway" for a poster presentation at the AACR Special Conference on Pancreatic Cancer, and from Biomolecules , a scientific journal focused on the function and mechanism of bioactive molecules, which published an article titled "Namodenoson Inhibits the Growth of Pancreatic Carcinoma via Deregulation of the Wnt/β-catenin, NF-κB, and RAS Signaling Pathways."
About Namodenoson
Namodenoson is a small orally bioavailable drug that binds with high affinity and selectivity to the A3 adenosine receptor (A3AR). Namodenoson was evaluated in Phase II trials for two indications, as a second line treatment for hepatocellular carcinoma, and as a treatment for non-alcoholic fatty liver disease (NAFLD) and non-alcoholic steatohepatitis (NASH). A3AR is highly expressed in diseased cells whereas low expression is found in normal cells. This differential effect accounts for the excellent safety profile of the drug.
About Can-Fite BioPharma Ltd.
Can-Fite BioPharma Ltd. (NYSE American: CANF) (TASE: CANF) is an advanced clinical stage drug development Company with a platform technology that is designed to address multi-billion dollar markets in the treatment of cancer, liver, and inflammatory disease. The Company’s lead drug candidate, Piclidenoson recently reported topline results in a Phase III trial for psoriasis and is expected to commence a pivotal Phase III. Can-Fite’s cancer and liver drug, Namodenoson, is being evaluated in a Phase IIb trial for the treatment of Metabolic Dysfunction-associated Steatohepatitis (MASH), a Phase III pivotal trial for hepatocellular carcinoma (HCC), and the Company is planning a Phase IIa study in pancreatic cancer. Namodenoson has been granted Orphan Drug Designation in the U.S. and Europe and Fast Track Designation as a second line treatment for HCC by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. Namodenoson has also shown proof of concept to potentially treat other cancers including colon, prostate, and melanoma. CF602, the Company’s third drug candidate, has shown efficacy in the treatment of erectile dysfunction. These drugs have an excellent safety profile with experience in over 1,600 patients in clinical studies to date. For more information please visit: www.can-fite.com .
Forward-Looking Statements
This press release may contain forward-looking statements, about Can-Fite’s expectations, beliefs or intentions regarding, among other things, its product development efforts, business, financial condition, results of operations, strategies or prospects. All statements in this communication, other than those relating to historical facts, are “forward looking statements”. Forward-looking statements can be identified by the use of forward-looking words such as “believe,” “expect,” “intend,” “plan,” “may,” “should” or “anticipate” or their negatives or other variations of these words or other comparable words or by the fact that these statements do not relate strictly to historical or current matters. Forward-looking statements relate to anticipated or expected events, activities, trends or results as of the date they are made. Because forward-looking statements relate to matters that have not yet occurred, these statements are inherently subject to known and unknown risks, uncertainties and other factors that may cause Can-Fite’s actual results, performance or achievements to be materially different from any future results, performance or achievements expressed or implied by the forward-looking statements. Important factors that could cause actual results, performance or achievements to differ materially from those anticipated in these forward-looking statements include, among other things, our history of losses and needs for additional capital to fund our operations and our inability to obtain additional capital on acceptable terms, or at all; uncertainties of cash flows and inability to meet working capital needs; the initiation, timing, progress and results of our preclinical studies, clinical trials and other product candidate development efforts; our ability to advance our product candidates into clinical trials or to successfully complete our preclinical studies or clinical trials; our receipt of regulatory approvals for our product candidates, and the timing of other regulatory filings and approvals; the clinical development, commercialization and market acceptance of our product candidates; our ability to establish and maintain strategic partnerships and other corporate collaborations; the implementation of our business model and strategic plans for our business and product candidates; the scope of protection we are able to establish and maintain for intellectual property rights covering our product candidates and our ability to operate our business without infringing the intellectual property rights of others; competitive companies, technologies and our industry; risks related to any resurgence of the COVID-19 pandemic and the war between Israel and Hamas; risks related to not satisfying the continued listing requirements of NYSE American; and statements as to the impact of the political and security situation in Israel on our business. More information on these risks, uncertainties and other factors is included from time to time in the “Risk Factors” section of Can-Fite’s Annual Report on Form 20-F filed with the SEC on March 28, 2024 and other public reports filed with the SEC and in its periodic filings with the TASE. Existing and prospective investors are cautioned not to place undue reliance on these forward-looking statements, which speak only as of the date hereof. Can-Fite undertakes no obligation to publicly update or review any forward-looking statement, whether as a result of new information, future developments or otherwise, except as may be required by any applicable securities laws.
View source version on businesswire.com: https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20240610723784/en/
Can-Fite BioPharma Motti Farbstein [info@canfite.com](mailto:info@canfite.com) +972-3-9241114

My sweet, beautiful tortie is at the end of her road, went to 3 vets and the diagnoses were all the same. Massive liver tumor, small tumors on spleen, ascites/ free flowing liquid in abdomen, which enlarged her belly over the span of 2 weeks.
She’s taking 1/4 pill prednisolone, 2ml lattosio, and a notch of liquid liver function paste daily. I realize we’re just trying to keep her comfortable until her time comes- the problem is her constipation.
She hasn’t had a bowel movement in 7 days, and I can tell that this is by far causing her more frustration and discomfort than the ascites belly. She cries and hunches on the ground, nothing comes out. We took her to the vet and they gave her 2 enemas, nothing happened. My husband thinks trying another time will just stress her out.
My question is what could be causing the constipation? How could she be blocked when she’s been on lattosio (we’re in Italy so probably this is just lactose in the US) for 3 weeks? Could this be due to movement of organs or pressure that may have disturbed the alignment of her colon/rectum? After 7 days are we right to just let nature take its course since she’s dealing with cancer anyway?
She’s the love of my life and I just want her to be comfortable- and she isn’t in this state. But she’s still eating a little, drinking, and occasionally climbing on the window sill to knock things over for “fun”, so I feel it’s too soon for the final call. We’ve already made arrangements for a local vet to come to the house when the time comes.
Any advice to help her be more comfortable and give us knowledge about what could be going on in her body would give us some peace of mind. Also just knowing what to expect if she doesn’t pass stool- she is leaking urine on her pads we’ve laid out for her, so some ammonia is escaping her body, thankfully.
Thank you for any advice 🙏

Hi everyone , I'm a 29 yr old male. I'd say 40lbs over weight. Now sure where I'm supposed to be at. I'm like 5'5-5'6. But anyways I'm definitely overweight At 180lbs. I've eaten like shit since I've been on my own at 18. Never really developed healthy eating habits up until the last months when I got my blood work done and had high cholesterol and high liver enzymes. So I've been eating veggies/fruits everyday and doing prepped meals. Anyways I have a hemorrhoid that's huge. My roommate said to get checked to see if it's a polyp. Doctors said it was a hemorrhoid. Went to urgent care and the ER in hopes for it to be removed.im seeing a surgeon next week.So anyways when got the blood work done I asked my PCP for a colon cancer screening and she said they typically don't screen until I'm 50 yrs old. My issue is that I'm sure something is up with me. Maybe I have health anxiety but I know my insurance will cover the colonoscopy, and that's the thing is I have really good insurance, won't last long cause I'm working and such. So I'm trying to take advantage of the fact I have zero copays. that and since I'm eating right id like to continue on this path and never go back. What can I say to my doctor to convince her to do a screening? Should I lie and say I have black stools and blood? I hate to lie but I think she listen to me, she's getting paid either way. I read online colon polyps are very common and doctors expect to find them in a quarter of all colonoscopys they do. Am I just freaking out if I have no symptoms of colon cancer ??? Thanks in advanced

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it as short as possible, which probably won't be particularly short tbh x)
On may 13th I took random allergy bloodtest, because it's been years since I've done one and I wanted to see I'd the allergies had gotten worse. Two days later my doctor told me I was anemic (hemoglobin was at a 7) and needed to come in the next day. The next day I went there and he examined me and told me to go to the emergency room. They did a new bloodtest at the emergency room and my hemoglobin was at a 6.5. I was admitted overnight and got a blood transfusion. After the transfusion my hemoglobin was at a 9 and I was sent home, but was told I needed to do more exams/scans, because they didn't know why I was so anemic.
Ten days later (may 27th) I had a colonoscopy, where the doctor found at least 200 polyps in my colon as well as 3 different cancerous tumors. I was told that I needed a CT to see if the cancer had spread, but that if it was only contained to the colon I just needed surgery to remove the colon and then I'd be completely cancer free. Two days later I had a rectoscopy to measure the distance to the first tumor and the doctor found a polyp in my rectum and did a biopsy. The polyp was not cancerous, but it could turn into a cancerous tumor.
On June 3rd I had a CT scan to see if my cancer had spread, did not get any results of the scan the same day. On June 6th I had an appointment with another doctor at the gastro-something department. He told me that the cancer had spread to my liver, and because there was so much cancer on my liver, I need chemotherapy to reduce it before they could operate. But he also said that the cancer was luckily only on one side of the liver, so once we had reduced the amount of cancer they could operate the half with cancer on it. And then I'd also need to have my colon and rectum removed and get a colostomy (stoma). He also said there was a tiny something on my lungs, but it was so small that they weren't sure if it's the cancer or not. I knew in my gut that the cancer had spread, even before I did the CT, but it was still difficult to hear the news about the liver and colostomy.
The next day I had an appointment with a doctor at the cancer ward/department (I'm not sure which is the right word to use here😅) and this doctor told me that the situation was even more severe. The cancer hadn't only spread to the liver, it has also spread to my lymph nodes and blood vessels. The spot on my lungs is only 6mm, so they still don't know if this is the cancer or not.
I was told that surgery is not an option any time soon, because the cancer has spread so much. I'm starting chemo on Tuesday. I'll start slow with a low dose because of my chronic illness diagnoses (fibromyalgia and endometriosis, but in this case especially because of the fibromyalgi) to make sure I can handle the treatment. At some point I'll get a chemo port put in, but until then I'll spend 2 night in the hospital every 2 weeks for the chemo. After I get the port I only need to be in the hospital for the beginning of the treatment and then I can do the rest at home with a pump connected to the port.
This whole situation makes me feel weird and emotional and scared and also kinda lucky.
I feel weird because I don't really have any symptoms that felt any different than my normal chronic pain and fatigue. Even when my hemoglobin was at a 6.5 I felt normal, because it happened very gradually and my body compensated for it, so I had no symptoms. After they mentioned checking my liver to see if the cancer had spread, I realized if been having pain in the area where my liver is, BUT it didn't feel any different than random flare ups I get all the time, so I just thought it was my normal pain.
I feel kinda emotional, but also numb. Like my brain is trying to protect me from feeling the feels. Kinda like the brain uses adrenaline to make you not feel pain after a severe car crash, except instead of pain it's feelings. I constantly feel like I'm about to break down and just cry for hours, but the tears never come. I WANT to cry and break down. I want to get it out, 'cause I know I'd feel at least a little bit better afterwards. But the tears just never come. I cried a little bit right after getting the diagnosis, but not much.
I'm scared because.. well, it's cancer and chemo. I'm sure that would be scary for anyone, especially when it's something they've never done before. I'm scared of the side effects of chemo. I'm scared that the chemo won't help. I asked the doctor what would happen I'd the chemo doesn't help. She said that there are several different chemos that they can try, but if none of them work then this is something I would die from. But she said that would be years from now, I just don't know if that means a couple of years or 10 years or maybe even more. Of course I'm hoping that the chemo helps. Hell, as much as I hate the idea of having a colostomy/stoma, I'm even hoping to get that done, because it would mean the cancer has been reduced enough that they think they can get rid of all of it or most of it. But I'm still scared that none of the chemo's that they can try for me will help and that I will die from this. Everyone I know keeps telling me that I can always talk with them if I need someone to talk to, but none of them has ever had cancer. The only person I knew who had cancer several times (including colon cancer severe enough to get a stoma) in her life was my grandma. But she died in 2020 of bladder cancer and old age. And I miss our dog so much. He was always my emotional support, always there for my through all the toughest parts of my life. But he died in 2020. Ever since getting the diagnosis I've missed him so damn much, because I don't have a dog for emotional support and cuddles, and he was just the best at both of those things.
But, I also feel lucky. I feel so damn lucky that this was caught now, because of a random coincidental allergy bloodtest. I do annual bloodtests at my doctors office to keep track and make sure everything is okay. But those bloodtests wouldn't happen until November, unless I started having symptoms. And I've had these polyps and they've been bleeding for months without me having any symptoms, because my body compensated for it, so who knows when or if I would actually ever notice any symptoms. And if the cancer is this severe now, I can't imagine how severe it would be several months from now without any sort of treatment. So, I feel lucky that it was caught now. But I also feel like I don't deserve this. No one deserves cancer. I've already had so much shit happen in my life, so many health issues, both physical and mental. I need to gather all my strength and fight to make it through this, but I've been doing that for pretty much my entire life. This is by far my hardest battle yet, but I'm not sure how to gather the strength and fight that I need to get through this, even with all the help and support from family and friends.
I've even started making a cancer playlist with songs to listen to when I don't feel like I don't have any fight left in me. Just in case I need it, 'cause music has always helped me so much when I'm struggling. (If anyone has any suggestions for songs to add, or any other tips/advice on how to deal with all this, it'd be greatly appreciated!)
This post ended up being much longer than I thought it would be x) I guess I really needed to vent to someone who does/might understand what I'm going through and how I'm feeling, 'cause even though my friends and family understand why I feel the way I feel, it's just different when someone who is going/has gone through the same or a similar thing understands how I feel.

i (20f, 120 pounds) was diagnosed with nafld about a year or two ago and i’ve been having some severe problems since. my liver is 13cm and is pressing against my other organs. my stomach, intestines and colon do not contract the way they need to. i’m at risk for losing my gallbladder and possibly my colon if the pain doesn’t get under control. i eat fairly healthy, exersize when i can and was recently working two jobs but had to let one go do to health complications. i feel like my life has been on pause since all these issues arose. the nafld was trauma induced from an overdose (advil and other medications) and my life hasn’t been the same. i feel myself losing strength each day. is there any way i can keep my colon? has anyone else had any issues like this? i’m willing to go into more detail if asked. thank you.

NADH testing and the Karen Read Blood Alcohol Mystery
u/Upper_Canada_Pango
June 8, 2024
TL; DR
The commonwealth’s estimate of Karen Read’s blood alcohol range is not forensically suitable and should be disregarded by the jury due to all sorts of reasonable doubt.
edit: In case it wasn't clear, the NADH screening test was PROBABLY performed in a way that would account for elevations or interference from any relevant factors but we never got adequately into this in the testimony. Furthermore the test performed is not intended to be, nor should it be considered, forensically reliable. Additionally, even assuming the NADH test is completely accurate there are too many unknowns to use this to back-calculate to the alleged time of the alleged incident. Ergo: reasonable doubt writ large.
Introduction
I am not a lab tech, biologist or other sort of expert on human metabolism or toxicology. I do, however, have some education in organic chemistry and a practical understanding of some aspects of anatomy, physiology, biology and pharmacology. For those in the healthcare field that are offended by my deviations from APA formatting, please forgive me: for I absolutely hate APA, I am saddened when I am forced to use it, and I am just not going to follow a specific style guide for this post. In-text citations will not be used, references will be both disorganised and poorly formatted. I will indicate references in-text through the use of numbers in superscript. All times will be given in 24 hour format, not military format, I don’t know why the military is allergic to colons, but I like them, so they’re coming in! I did not proof read this, it’s already taken way too much of my life. I am also quite disappointed that my formatting won't paste properly into the post editor, the markdown editor is very clunky.
Testimony from the Karen Read trial involving the Commonwealth of Massachusetts’ opinion of Karen Read’s blood alcohol level at the alleged time of the alleged vehicle strike on John O’Keefe piqued my interest. Particularly I was fascinated by the fact that no direct alcohol breath test or blood test was performed, nor were any tests performed to detect any alcohol metabolite, although I have yet to find a news source that has stated as much, in fact they either omit the test type or misrepresent the test as one to detect the presence of alcohol in blood serum^{2,3,4,5,6.8,etc ad nauseum}.. Instead Dr. Gary Faller, pathologist at Good Samaritan Medical Center, testified that a serum test was run to detect the presence of NADH¹. I know what you’re thinking: “Why did they perform a screening test using an ubiquitous endogenous redox agent with no forensic validity¹³ instead of for alcohol or an alcohol metabolite like acetaldehyde, ethyl glucuronide or ethyl sulphate⁷?” and yeah, that’s what I’m thinking, too! For forensically valid results there needs to be a confirmatory test done¹³, which clearly either didn’t happen or wasn’t useful - otherwise it would have been introduced by the prosecution. So I have put this together to show what NADH testing means, why it is used, how it works and what the limitations of this testing are.
The Basics
Testing for NADH is done to screen for the presence of alcohol. Screening tests are a fast-and-cheap way of getting an idea of what’s going on, and are used when precision and certainty are not necessary. For example if you are in a hospital and have someone on a psych hold, you might want to get an idea of whether their behaviour is in part driven by consumption of drugs. Their life doesn’t depend on the answer and neither does their freedom (beyond the short-term). Forensic lab testing for alcohol uses dual-column gas chromatography or gas chromatography/mass spectrometry¹³. These are large, expensive, delicate machines so you don’t just send everything to GC/MS analysis without a good reason, just like you’re not going to get a CT scan for a sprained thumb. If you are a hospital and the cops want a blood sample for forensic analysis you can just draw blood for them, put it in the freezer until they pick it up, and then it’s the cops’ problem. Hospitals are not in the business of forensics.
So why Nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide-H testing? Well that’s simple enough. Nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide is an essential, innate redox agent that exists in all your cellular fluids and is there to accept hydrogen atoms as other substances are oxidized¹⁴. It therefor exists in different redox states, the oxidised state NAD+ and the reduced state NADH. “nicotinamide adenine nucleotide (NAD) is required in more enzymatic reactions than perhaps any other small molecule^16.” These two forms are non-destructively converted back and forth in various biochemical reactions, but the nucleotide can be consumed in certain reactions so it has to be constantly manufactured by the body in order for us to continue living.. NAD is synthesised in the liver, nerve cells and immune cells, and salvaged for reuse in a wide variety of tissues.
The primary way alcohol is metabolised it interacts with a class of enzymes called alcohol dehydrogenases¹⁵ (confusingly abbreviated ADH, despite not being structurally similar to NADH). When a molecule of ethanol is oxidised two hydrogen atoms get knocked off, one off the -OH alcohol group, and one off the carbon atom the -OH group is attached to, so the -OH becomes an =O converting the ethanol to an aldehyde called ethanal or more commonly acetaldehyde. These hydrogen atoms are accepted by the NAD+, reducing it to NADH. You have a limited supply of NAD+. Drugs whether recreational or medical, or other substances that are metabolised by oxidation will compete for NAD+, raise NADH levels and slow the metabolism of alcohol. Other oxidation reactions will pump up the NADH levels too. These variables are huge! Worse still, NAD+ conversion to NADH is heavily effected by cellular metabolism, meaning that acute stress and exercise will convert NAD+ into NADH as well¹⁴. Finally multiple sclerosis, which Karen Read has, will approximately double the baseline serum NADH level.¹⁷ Karen Read undergoing acute stress. CPR is exercise. Was she on other medications that increase NADH levels?
Rates of alcohol metabolism can vary up to 4-fold, especially since it occurs primarily in the stomach and liver. Large amounts of ADH are released in the stomach, so when drinks are consumed on an empty stomach they are dumped into the intestines quickly and are absorbed into portal circulation without giving the stomach ADH a chance to mitigate the effects, but then alcohol will be metabolised more quickly after ingestion. Liver damage will slow the rate of metabolism as well.
The Testimony
Dr. Faller reports a time of blood draw around 09:08-09:13 , the blood was centrifuged and seperated, the plasma was put into a machine that tested for alcohol giving result of 93mg/dl serum alcohol level. This, if accurate, would be higher than the whole blood alcohol level. The doctor refused to even ballpark this to a percentage for either serum or whole blood. He did acknowledge that LDH and hemolysis and bilirubin levels can interfere but should be flagged. The defence did bring up abnormal muscle degeneration, and so on but the doctor wasn’t aware of this literature. I don’t know that the defence couldn’t proceed due to this, but I feel they may have missed a trick here. Hopefully they will call a more informed expert on NAD/NADH metabolism.
The forensic toxicologist estimated her peak whole blood alcohol percentage at between 0.135 and 0.292 assuming last drink at 00:45 but I don’t want to even get deeply into these estimates because they’re built on a foundation of sand: we don’t really know when Karen Read started drinking, how much she drank, when she stopped drinking, or how much the NADH test was thrown off by stress, activity, disease or medication. We didn’t also didn’t get into any description of the test process itself. We don’t know if the machine measured NADH once, or if it measured NADH before and after adding ADH, or if it measured NADH only after adding ADH. We don’t know enough to evaluate this information.
On either basis, the results should be discarded.
Armchair Forensics
Personally I think Karen was drunk, at some point, but “is this evidence good enough to secure a conviction for an OWI?” is a whole other question. So is “How much did she drink?”; “How impaired was she, and when?”; “when did she start and stop drinking?” and critically from a conviction standpoint “what was her BAC at the alleged time of the alleged incident, and how do we know?”
We can kind of armchair lab tech this, given some assumptions. I don’t have access to the actual bar receipts but it seems probable, based on what I can find in the news^9,10,11, that while at the two bars she had somewhere between 8 and 15 standard drinks depending on if any of those drinks were doubles. She was drinking these between 20:58 approximately 00:00. I do not have information at this point eliminate pre- and post-drinking, all these people seem like they drink quite a bit. I can’t even discount the possibility that she got up at 04:30 and slammed some back. If we assume that these are all the drinks she had before the alleged incident, and she didn’t have any after the alleged incident, and we accept a weight estimate at 60kg/132lbs¹² then we can use a simple web tools to estimate her BAC(Appendix A). The results are generally mortifying, with estimates essentially ranging from ‘maybe unable to walk without assistance’ to an acute medical emergency . Maybe Karen can hold her liquor quite well or maybe these calculators were all designed by and for lightweights since evidently my wife and basically any girlfriend I’ve ever had could evidently drink the average BAC calculator designer under the table.
Conclusion
Without access to receipts, and since “no one appeared drunk” and at no point did anyone testify to detecting the odour of alcohol from her: not the paramedics, not the cops, not the ER doctor, not her so-called friends so based on my armchair BAC results (appendix A) show either she was stinking drunk and somehow no one noticed or she didn’t actually consume 8+ standard alcoholic drinks in 3 hours. I lean towards the former, but without confirmatory, forensic testing I don’t see how this gets to the “beyond reasonable doubt” standard. I don’t understand why the first police on the scene didn’t perform a PBT on her based on their testimony that she was saying anything like “did I hit him?” or “I hit him.” It also doesn’t make any sense that no one applied for a blood draw warrant once the picture supposedly started getting more clear.
We have another estimated 3+ weeks of trial for things to develop, and clearly there’s information I have not and/or can not access, but I find it very striking that yet again we have supposed forensic evidence that is not up to snuff. In combination with all the other shenanigans and incompetence displayed during and after the investigation this entire process starts looking like it has more to do with tunnel-vision, conspiratorial afterthought, and/or prosecutorial sleight-of-hand.
If I were on the jury I would be fighting to acquit based on copious amounts of doubt regarding essentially every element of every charge.
References
1- Baker, Emily D.. (May 28, 2024). MA. v Karen Read Trial Day 18 - Afternoon Session. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVX-YZ1wkDc
2- Ramer, Holly. (May 28, 2024). Jurors hear about Karen Read's blood alcohol level as murder trial enters fifth week. ABC News. https://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/jurors-hear-karen-reads-blood-alcohol-level-murder-110624411
3- Schooley, Matt (May 28, 2024). What was Karen Read's blood alcohol level on the night John O'Keefe died? Experts testify at trial. CBS News.
https://www.cbsnews.com/boston/news/karen-read-live-stream-today-brian-higgins/
4- Ramer, Holly (May 29, 2024), What was Karen Read's blood alcohol level the day John O'Keefe died? Here's what we learned. NBC Boston.
https://www.nbcboston.com/news/local/what-was-karen-reads-blood-alcohol-level-on-the-day-john-okeefe-died-heres-what-we-learned-this-week/3382901/
5- Lavery, Tréa. (May 29, 2024). Karen Read trial live updates: Read may have had BAC more than three times limit. MassLive. https://www.masslive.com/news/2024/05/karen-read-trial-live-updates-for-tuesday-may-28.html
6- Reynolds, Lance. (May 28, 2024). Karen Read murder trial Day 18: Witnesses focus on O’Keefe’s injuries, Read’s blood alcohol level. Boston Herald. https://www.bostonherald.com/2024/05/28/karen-read-murder-trial-day-18-witnesses-focus-on-okeefes-injuries-reads-blood-alcohol-level/
7- Ferguson, Sian (May 1, 2023) How is Alcohol Detected in a Urine Test?. Healthline. https://www.healthline.com/health/urine-test-alcohol
8- Benoit, Katie. (May 28, 2023). Expert testifies about Karen Read's blood alcohol content from morning O'Keefe found dead. WJAR. https://turnto10.com/news/local/karen-read-trial-resumes-tuesday-john-okeefe-murder-canton-dedham-boston-police
9- Lavery, Tréa. (June 5, 2024). Karen Read trial live updates: State police investigator recalls interview with Read. https://www.masslive.com/news/2024/06/karen-read-trial-live-updates-testimony-resumes-on-wednesday.html
10- Tenser, Phil (April 16, 2024). Karen Read murder case: Alleged timeline, according to the prosecution. WCVB. https://www.wcvb.com/article/karen-read-case-prosecution-alleged-timeline/60510196
11- Bienick, David. (May 10, 2024). Karen Read murder trial: Owners of home where O'Keefe was found testify. WCVB. https://www.wcvb.com/article/karen-read-trial-live-updates-may-10-2024/60755150
12- Ankit. (February 28, 2024) Karen Read Net Worth, Wiki, Parents, Ethnicity, Religion, Bio, Age, Family And More. SarkariExam.com
https://www.sarkariexam.com/karen-read-net-worth-wiki-parents-ethnicity-religion-bio-age-family-and-more/617729
13- Okorocha, Okorie. (April, 2021). Alcohol Toxicology For Civil Lawyers. Advocate Magazine. https://www.advocatemagazine.com/article/2021-april/alcohol-toxicology-for-civil-lawyers
14- Walzik, David et. al. (January 4, 2023) Tissue-specific effects of exercise as NAD+-boosting strategy: Current knowledge and future perspectives. Acta Physiologica. https://doi.org/10.1111/apha.13921
15- Cederbaum, Arthur. (November 1, 2013). Alcohol Metabolism. Clinical Liver Disease. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cld.2012.08.002
16- Penberthy, Todd & Tsunoda, Ikuo. (March 5, 2009). The Importance of NAD in Multiple Sclerosis. Current Pharmaceutical Design. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2651433/
17- Braidy, Nady et al. (November 6, 2013). Serum nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide levels through disease course in multiple sclerosis. Elsevier. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0006899313011475
Appendix A: BAC Calculator results

• https://smartserve.ca/bac-chart/ has limited weight inputs, if we pick 125lb female and 8 drinks over 3 hours we get a peak BAC of 0.25, a shocking 3+ times the legal limit and physically dangerous, with risks including inadequate breathing pattern, incontinence, inability to walk without assistance and loss of consciousness. Smartserve ballparks an alcohol elimation rate of 1 standard drink per hour, so in the 8-drink scenario, on Jan 29 at 04:53 when she called Jen McCabe she should have had the equivalent of 0-3 drinks left in her system, and none whatsoever when her blood was drawn, but the NADH based estimate for her BAC at time of draw (09:08)was 0.093%1. Unfortunately this calculator goes to a maximum of 9 drinks, so it was clearly designed by and for lightweights but we don’t need to assume any of these drinks were doubles based on the mortifying results from this and other calculators.
• I next tried https://alcohol.org/bac-calculato set for female 132 pounds, 8 drinks with a time since first drink of 3 hours 15 minutes to give blood alcohol at 00:15. It gives 0.31% and states “You're probably not reading this because there's a good chance that you're unconscious. This BAC indicates alcohol poisoning, and there is a very serious risk of long-term damage or death. If you or someone you're with are at this BAC level, you should seek immediate medical assistance.” I played around with this calculator a bit and it turns out it is also designed by and for lightweights. Nevertheless, it suggested that BAC would be back to 0 in 21 hours, which would be around 21:15 on January 29th.
• https://www.drinkfox.com/tools/bac-calculatoca set to 43 year old female, 60kg, gives me a BAC of 0.2267% at 00:00 and says would be down to 0.08% at 09:15, down to zero at 13:35.
• https://globalrph.com/medcalcs/blood-alcohol-calculator-bac-metric-of-alcohol-intoxication/ assuming 12oz drink size average at 5% abv (so 8 standard drinks) female 60kg gives an average female 0.307 blood alcohol at 00:00, 0.222% at 05:00. Finally 0.154% at 09:00

I have had three bunnies in recent history and two have passed away and the third is at the emergency vet right now. My first beautiful boy passed from a short intense illness that was never really explained. I believe it was liver failure, did not present as classical torsion but maybe something like that. I spent thousands of dollars during this short but terrible time. My next rescue was a spotted bun who was discovered to have mega colon. I kept him on a strict diet and he was still hospitalized and medicated multiple times with stasis. After a couple years a sudden bout took him from us. My current rescue girl is at the emergency vet with a burst abscess. I did some reading and feel sick about this. I feel like every bad scenario has happened to my poor babies no matter how hard I tried to protect them. I feel completely defeated, depressed and absolutely devastated. I will never adopt another bunny even though they have brought so much joy to me. I can’t handle this terrible pain (and I can’t afford the extreme expense) which seems unavoidable in bunny ownership. Please send good vibes to my girl.

Let’s discuss and post our opinions as to what is happening. Please also tell us if you’re someone who is typically a believer of conspiracy. I am not. But something is seriously wrong. If you have expertise in an area please let us know too. This sub is amazing and we need answers! I don’t have enough intel to theorize about the fight on the 28th or Rose Hanburys alleged baby with William. But I really wanna hear everyone else’s take on this. Medically, here is what I know. I am a health researcher who used to work in one of the largest cancer centers in the US. She could have had an exploratory surgery for either : the key here is that they said she had surgery which means cutting so it can’t be an endoscopy ( stomach) or a colonoscopy ( colon ) — endometriosis surgery or hysterectomy —x lap surgery they find ovarian cancer — spreads to peritoneum — spreads to brain —> Kate is toast and will die soon — chrons disease or ulcerative colitis surgery ( assuming she had been diagnosed before ) — found colon cancer — spreads to the liver and perhaps the brain ( rare occurrence but does happen) — most other cancers in the abdomen would likely have been detected with imaging and not a “scheduled “ surgery. Ok, assuming this is true. Kate had surgery Jan 16 and allegedly William got the call that it was cancer mid February ( I don’t have the exact date) but this is when he cancelled an event for “personal reasons”. This is a very long turnover for pathology results to come back — especially if you’re a royal. I understand NHS is slower that the US but this is the royal family… in the US, these results would be back in 10 days at the mossst…. This was a red flag for me… why would this pathology report take so long ( now don’t get me wrong - it can take up to 1.5 months for extremely rare and complicated cancers, but still)
If Kaye truly had cancer, I believe she would still show her face to the world, I think she’s a beautiful woman inside and out and is very brave. Even emaciated and balding, she would ask people to pray and to donate to a cancer fund. Now, If she had brain metastasis and is in a vegetative state, she couldn’t do that. But that would be contrary to what was said— preventative or adjuvant chemo, which means they think they got all the cancer in the surgery…. Technically it “could” still spread to the brain after that. So this story could be true or it could be the lie they will tell— trying to keep it as medically accurate without revealing details. But why not just freaking say: Kate had this type of cancer and it’s spread to this part and she is on her death bed? The very fact the type of cancer is a secret also makes no sense. One other thing: the ambulance wouldn’t be called for this to sandringham.

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Prologue part 2
Chapter 1: Song of rainfall, and snow part 1.
Date: Feb 12th, 2046 9:23 AM/PCT Location: Proxima Centauri B, Outskirts of Kashuna, Capital of Proxima Centauri
“Hey! hey! Your local Global occult defense initiative recruiter here. The world is gonna get worse before it gets better. No seriously look around you. Around you, you are surrounded by Aliens, the occult, and things beyond comprehension that God made just for fun. It's our job to protect humanity from these world ending threats.” The video cuts to an event where the skies suddenly turn blood red mixed with an aurora borealis, fissures appear in the crimson skies, and azure liquids falling from the skies. When the droplets of the azure liquids drop into the ground they turned into horrific amalgamations of flesh, and liquids. The video cuts to a person being engulfed by the azure entities, and after a while the azure liquids suddenly disappears and the person who was engulfed by it started to laugh.
A moment later the body started to morph into another form, and was immediately lit up by humanoid robots with cold azure eyes. Some parts looked human. Mainly the head, and the body. The ears looked like headphones, the limbs looked so robotic or something akin to that of a prosthetics, and the eyes… Looks akin to that of the creature from the azure liquid. Seeing that sent shivers down my mind. Suddenly I felt like wanting to run away but didn't because I didn't want to fall off a jeep running at 60 miles per hour. But a second later I felt like my body was being broken apart. I don't know why but I just felt that way. In some part of me I felt somewhat disgusted at myself. Seemingly seeing myself as one of them.
A tear appeared on my face, making me feel dread as the video played. I don't know why… But it both made me sad, and angry. Like how I felt when I lost both mom, and dad. I shook my head and tried my best to ignore it. It's probably just my imagination or my mental instability. Yet something nagged at me like it wasn't. “Whether domestic or international. Do you really think we haven't suffered through the stars just to get here? Well if you know history then your answer is no, and you would be perfect for joining our local mobile task forces. Such as MTF Fox-2 The sneaky bastards.” Suddenly the screen cuts to footage of robotic soldiers in full optical camouflage uniforms gunning down some sort of ghost like apparitions. One of the apparitions looked like a giant orangutan that was given steroids, and was gunned down by a 70mm canon fire from a robotic construct that looked like a giant mechanical spider armed to the teeth with machine guns, and a main 150mm Howitzer, and a secondary 70mm flak. It's eyes glowed azure blue as it continued to gun down more of these apparitions.
“Um… Nau? Why does the local internet have military recruitment adds for humans? Like I bet the only people sent here are probably military personnel mostly, and some are researchers. So why is there military recruitment ads?” I asked curious about the reason this kind of ad was playing in this side of human controlled territory to try and distract myself from what I just saw and felt. If the UN was a conventional military then hiring soldiers from other nations or species would be out of the question.
“Well honestly K, you humans have been fighting off incursions for the last 5,000 years albiet in such smaller scales than what your normal species outside of the Orion arm does. It takes up a lot of man power to fight a prolonged war against wave incursions, and mutants from BEAR zones. To why you are fighting such draining conflicts? Well if I remember correctly a lot of these zones contain a lot of valuable resources to the point that fighting a large scale guerilla war would be worth the sacrifices. Not to even mention the main directive of the global occult defense initiative. To fight the things that bump in the night, and kill whatever things that threaten the safety, and veil of normalcy.”
“Their main motto is ‘We cull the things in the dark in order to live a normal life. We fight not for glory, profit, nor borders. We fight to keep normalcy.’ and sometimes this is just what they do. It takes a lot of manpower to contain things that can't be killed, to contain threats that might prove useful, to cull incursions, and to keep the veil of normalcy you know. Sometimes you need to outsource your recruiting from your target demographic. Think of it as a large scale version of the french foreign legion.”
Defragmentation complete.
Neural cloud status: Somewhat stable
Main cause of crash: Gravitational forces, and Thawing.
Reverting memories…..
Welcome. Recreatant 01.
Project Snowfall. ^{⁠_⁠^} :⁠-⁠P
-P.S remember. Mommy loves you K. Remember. Keep on living. No matter what happens. Even if the world drowns in rainfall.
A message appeared on my vision before quickly disappearing. I shrugged it off, thinking of it as some sort of hallucination, and a side effect of being thawed out which probably messed with my neurons.
Suddenly my mind started to feel light as it something has been lifted from my conscience.
“Kyruger you okay? You've been spacing out.”
“Yeah….. I'm fine.”
“What did I tell you?” She asked me.
“Umm….”
“Honestly I don't remember.”
“Well it's not like I'm letting you join them. Plus I wouldn't want you to disappear again.”
“We'll let's start to talk first. What do you remember?” I offered.
“How have you been Nau?” I smiled and looked at her, and I could faintly see her start to tear up as she stared back at me. For an honest second there I wanted to hug her but didn't because I wouldn't want us to both die. She's driving a buggy after all.
“Sure.” She said as she looked at the azure horizon whilst sighing. Currently the road we are driving is nothing but dust, and empty desert. As said by Nausica it would take 30 minutes to commute from the port to the capital. And currently we're traveling 80-90 miles per hour.
“Well. How do I put it…”
“I miss you Kyu. It's been lonely since you left.” She said whilst trying not to tear up. So.. your lonely. Just like me huh?
“How long has it been since I had…. a sincere connection….” She sighs before continuing.
“The past…. Twenty years has been rough to say the least. Everyone I met either hated me just because of my species or how I looked. Despite me trying my best to adapt….”
“People…. Still hated me….”
“Just like when we were kids…. “
“Just like when the neighbor’s kids used to belittle me just because of my hair color, and my eyes.”
“Despite me doing my best to be a good person, people still hated me for what I am. When I brought it up, or if someone knew they would avoid me. The only people that don't do that is people from my race, my sisters, and my S.T.A.L.K.E.R colleagues. Thanks to my race I couldn't get any job other than being a field agent outside of my species territory since the other species were reminded of the entities that came from the rainfall events everytime they saw us. Thus I worked for research institutes or secret societies as a freelance survey agent/S.T.A.L.K.E.R in B.E.A.R zones because of my species tolerance to Borsch radiation, and high survivability.” When I heard that, it made me feel bad for her. And quite honestly made me want to stick with her more out of pity.
“Want a hug?” I offered. She laughed.
“Sure after we arrive at the city.” She humored me.
“So how about you? What happened after you left?” She asked me. Now that I think about it. 4 years were a blur to me. All I remember was studying, and being alone most of the time. Other than that. The 4 years were basically trips.
“Well. My life went downhill. I followed my dream to be an astronaut and become an adventurer of the stars yet I failed. Everytime I tried to apply to NASA, they always rejected me. Years after years of applications rejected. Even though I both excelled in academics and physical fitness the agency still chose other candidates. After that I gave up. My heart couldn't bare it anymore. So I tried to work for other corporations. But was turned down every step of the way since I was either too good or my expectations were too high for what they were willing to pay for me. Most companies even tried to guilt trip me despite them offering me wages that would've barely keep me afloat. Thus I had no where else to go than to work at a government agency since it was the highest paying job, with great benefits I could find. Thus I worked at the FBI. The department of unusual incidents. Though my work was mostly doing debugging, fixing vulnerabilities, and sorting out papers every once in a while.”
“But everytime I sorted out papers they would give me some sort of pill that would make time fly for me. Honestly I don't remember much from those paper filings but it took a lot of time, and drained the hell out of me. It was tedious, with very strict deadlines. Eventually making me hate the bureaucracy since it wasn't in my pay grade to sort things out for them. There was a dedicated division for that but was severely understaffed. Even my division was severely understaffed. The only division that was fully staffed is the counter terrorism division which handled field operations. I don't really know much about the counter terrorism division, and the things I remembered are mostly they make arrests or investigate unusual incidents too unusual for even the other FBI departments.” I told her. Honestly thinking about it, the more I remembered the more I think I was miserable there. I couldn't help but sigh, and look at my hand.
“So that's why you posted those posts about your frustrations. You couldn't find any outlet, and decided to scream into the void.” She's….. right…..
I couldn't help thinking that I felt like my self deprecating humor was a way to cope. A way to voice out my frustration in humor.
“Heh…… your right…..”
“I couldn't find someone to talk to so I coped by other means. Making myself laugh whilst internally I was in turmoil at how frustrating my life was. Always burnt out, and devoid of the passion I wanted to work with.” Saying that made me feel… vulnerable…. Emotions of sadness, rage, and yet… happiness.
Sad about how my life was wasted, spiteful and rageful at how everything turned out, and happy that I had someone to be vulnerable with. Happy to talk it out without having a person to shove my self esteem out like some of the therapists I talked to. Happy that someone understood, and didn't immediately start to chew me down. Blaming me for the life I've lived even though I had no say with most of my life. In some ways some parts of therapy made me feel even worse.
Some part of me wanted to hug her…. yet I feel like it would be inappropriate. Hmm .. Now that I think about it…
I never opened up like this before. Some part of me was relieved that i was heard, another was insecure, seemingly paranoid that she'll just use me, and discard me the moment I had no use to her anymore. I don't know why that is… but it feels… just like it. Like I was some sort of doll being repaired over and over again by it's owner.
I shrugged. No point in dwelling in that. I have nothing waiting for me at home. No family, no friends…
Just crippling loneliness only alleviated by endless distractions, manic humor, and fake people hiding behind consumerism to alleviate the sense of meaninglessness brought by the modern world. God it feels so absurd. I feel like a stranger brought into another world where things are the same yet so different at the same time. I wonder. How whimsical are the other worlds? How is it different from the world I came from?
Aliens, humans all the same things. These are just people. Of a different species with different aspects, yet one aspect unites them all.
Self awareness, and sentience.
A deafening silence lingered in the air. Caused by my own words.
“I feel you. Despite the universe being filled with whimsy, and the occult. It's mundane. Absurd even in it's irony. Despite being whimsical, people want a mundane life. Makes you want to side with the anarchist coalition. But those are just idealists. Thinking that people want whimsy and freedom rather than safety, and stability.”
“I want to live in a world where I'm free. Free to choose whimsy, and fantasy rather than depressing, and devoid of passion replaced by the mundaneness of the modern world where the magic of reality is hidden behind secret societies, and where it only benefits the few. Where the anomalous become a part of life, and things or people like me aren't hated for what we couldn't choose.” Nau said, seemingly agreeing with what I said. A moment later she laughs in a way similar to that of someone who's lost it all. She sighs, and suddenly begins to hum a tune.
“La, lala, lala, lala, La, lala, lala, lala.” Suddenly snow began to fall as she continued to hum the tune. Whilst humming the tone, she looked upon the skies only to see snow began to fall.
“Beautiful isn't it?” she said, before continuing to hum the tune. I looked upon the snowfall. Whilst looking at it, it reminded me of my childhood. It felt whimsical. Reminding me of a nostalgic time. Made me feel like a kid again. I chuckled. I then took off my mask temporarily. Out of habit I stuck out my tongue, jokingly yet seriously wanting my life to return to a more nostalgic time. Right after that wore it back on.
“That's magic. Specifically sympathy magic. Where music is a part of the casting process of magic. Where it uses emotions from music to cast magic and embues the emotions on reality. Often it is called another thing.”
“The magic of the scene.” I then swallowed the snow, making me feel somber, and carthertic.
“You can feel it too. The magic can make you feel…..”
“What the caster feels.”
“To why God made it as it is. He only said to us is experience without emotion is hollow and refused to elaborate. To this day we still don't know what that means. The living reality is really cryptic. The eternal monarch. Often he explains things through poetry, and references in history. Even if we only knew that history thanks to him. He oftens say the sweetness of reality is found in the sobering and emotional experiences.”
“Is there really a God? If so why didn't he just try to fix it all? Isn't God supposed to be benevolent?” She laughed at my words.
“More like a spectator. He tried to be benevolent but it only led to more problems. So he let it all be. When he tried to fix everything it only led to more suffering.”
“No matter what he did, the old civilization he so cherished so much crumbled to dust. In a world where God exist he is powerless to the consequences of his actions. Everything has consequences. Whether he liked it or not. That's just how reality is. Despite having sway on reality, it still had some consequences that one cannot undo lest more consequences come. The story of the eternal monarch, and the God inside the machine is quite tragic. Two lovers broken by the world that cared nothing about them.” She laughs again whilst trying not to cry.
“tsk. Hahahhaahha!”
“What's so funny?”
“It's so ironic. Gods who symbolized omnipotence towards reality broken by the thing they lorded over. They are the embodiments of concepts. Yet the concepts they embodied and lorded over still held sway on their lives.”
“No matter who you are. Reality shows no mercy.” Suddenly she started to cry, and laugh at the same time. Seeing her like this made me feel bad for her. What made her into this? What broke her to this point? The whole thing was both awkward and cathartic.
“Want a hug?” I offered.
“Sure…. Hahahhahah!” She said whilst laughing, and crying. I hugged her. When Nau noticed it, she caressed my hair. It was an awkward two minutes before she talked normally again.
“Um…. I'm sorry…. I kinda said too much…” tears fell on my head, and I let go.
“Feel better?” I asked, and she nodded whilst snickering to herself similar to that of someone laughing to seeing something so absurd.
“If you want you can always cry on my shoulders.” I offered her. She smiled, and looked upon the azure skies.
“Fine…” She smiles, she then jokingly leaned on my shoulder whilst driving. I started to sweat bullets from it. Nau quickly lifted her head from my shoulders, and focused on the road, smiling as she did it. For the next 13 minutes we sat there in silence until we arrived at Kashuna.
Towers adorned the horizon. Towers that would dwarf the burj khalifa adorned the surrounding. Shops littered the streets selling food, appliances, etc. And people of multiple species walked around side by side, along with humans and humanoid constructs. Robots that looked human but clearly distinct by the way their body is constructed. Some had prosthetic looking bodies akin to that of something you'd see in cyberpunk or the original ghost in the shell. There's also some constructs that had ears or limbs similar to that of earth animals. Most I'd see was ears and tails similar to that of fluffy animals. Some even had prosthetics with sharp looking nails. The attires were even more of a hodgepodge of different cultures, and ethnicities. Some wore traditional Chinese attire, some Hindu, some east Asian, some south east Asian, some Russian, some European, and some modern American. The sight in front of me was interesting.
“What's with them?” I asked, finally breaking the 13 minute long silence.
“Oh the constructs? Those are humans put into homunculus. Souls who has been extracted from their body using magic to be put in bodies they desired. They're often called transhuman but are generally used for warfare or fun. Often homunculi are used in order to kill those who are immortal in a sense. Even if their body dies the soul escapes, and basically makes a new body within days thus causing the perpetrator to live Scot free. Basically just executioners in a law enforcement sense. Only something dead is allowed to kill or shatter a soul to the point of destruction. These people are either dead nor alive but technically dead. Biologically speaking they are just echoes. Echoes of memories of those that died. Lingering spirits who's will is strong enough to linger and have a sentience of their own akin of that of the living. That's just how the world works. It's the reason why could even fight against incursions and rainfall events in the first place. But those who die in these events generally have their souls shattered. Unable to be retrieved or pass on into the dark forest. The after life where the dead lie stuck in a world where they can experience the life they couldn't experience for eternity. But sometimes it causes the soul to go insane. Thus tries to break out but loses their humanity or sentience in the process.”
“But if that exists why didn't just anyone try to destroy it?”
“God doesn't want to. The story of the broken God explains why he doesn't want to. He keeps clinging into the past. Whenever damage is caused to that plane he would always try to repair it. Even if it's completely destroyed he still recreates it. Even caused the destruction of that species. Historically speaking that has happened three times. Three species wiped off.”
“Why don't we just kill him?” She laughed before pausing, and answering my absurd question.
“A species tried that only for him to come back, and destroy said civilization.” Oh….
“Yet we still respect him. Despite him creating a place where we all end up, and go insane eventually it's not entirely a bad thing. It's just people generally go insane if stuck there in a long amount of time. It's just an unfortunate side effect. It's all for a good cause. It's not his fault for that. No matter what he did. He even modified souls multiple times yet everytime they would go insane sooner or later. It's just the consequences. But the means justifies the ends for him.”
“We have no say on what he does just as he has no say on what we do.”
“The monarch was always a tragic figure. An idealist, and an idiot. And we love him for it.” She snickered whilst saying that last line. A few moments later she stopped, and parked the car. Nau then pulled out her phone, and started to do something with it.
“Well let's go the venue. You'll love what your going to see.” She said, smiling at me as she said that, it made my heart melt. I left the car, and she held my hand making me flustered. The both of us walked towards the parade whilst holding hands. When we finally arrived there, a large amount of people gathered around guard rails. Five minutes later the sound of drums, and people singing echoed around the block.
“Why can't we be friends?” <4x!> The sound of multiple accents singing echoed through the air. Suddenly on the skies a rainbow appeared. Is this the same magic Nau described and used?
Also are they singing why can't we be friends?
“I seen you around for a long, long time I remembered you when you drank my wine!” Humans wearing cloaks, and gasmask wearing UN insignias and another faction with an insignia of a flaming torch sang together laughing and smiling under the masks. Something you can notice by the way their eyes look.
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!> The people around me smiled, and laughed enjoying the parade.
“I seen you walking down in Chinatown I call you but you could not look around!” A bunch of people with thick Chinese accents sang together.
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!>
“I pay my money to the welfare line I see you standing in it every time!” Some soldiers with thick Louisianian, Texan, and New Yorker accents sang together making me chuckle. The differing accents made it so funny for me.
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!>
“The color of your skin don't matter to me As long as we can live in harmony!” People with Russian, Chinese, British, Indian, French, and American accents sang together.
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!>
“I'd kinda like to be the president So I can show you how your money's spent!” A bunch of American soldiers sang together, trying their best not to laugh.
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!>
“Sometimes I don't speak right But yet I know what I'm talking about!” A bunch of soldiers with thick Russian accents sang making the scene even more funnier.
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!>
“I know you're working for the CIA They wouldn't have you in the mafia!”
“Why can't we be friends?” <16x!>
“Why can't we be friends? I want to be your friend. Why can't we be friends? I want to be your friend.”
“Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends?”
“WOOOHOOOO!!!” The crowd around me cheered with a round of applause. Seemingly enjoying the performance of the army. Next above us a squadron of giant mechs flew by, seemingly partaking of the festivities. A moment later the squadron of high flying mechs fired a barrage of confetti. A moment later another squadron dropped a few mechanized spider unit with artillery strapped to it. Some sort of robotic quadrupedal tank. It's eyes glowed blue as it activated.
“Yes! Chaikovsky baby!” An alien speaking English said. The crowd cheered on. A moment later a symphony started and a bunch of constructs holding instruments gathered on the streets and started to play chaikovsky’s 1812 overture. The constructs marched to the beat for the whole durations. The people enjoyed their performance.
Suddenly the guns on the mechanized units fired as the iconic part of The 1812 overture played. The sound of artillery echoed as the units fired their guns. Thankfully it was just blanks, and didn't shower us with broken glass shards. The people cheered even more as they saw the artillery on the mechanized spiders fired.
The sound of people cheering drowned my ears with tinnitus almost deafening me. Right beside me Nau was enjoying the show. A genuine smile plastered on her face. Right after this the performance marched further, and further into the city. She tugged on my hand, wanting me to come with her to follow the parade.
The next performance was another song. But unlike the last songs it was sobering.
“This one is for our fallen. To those who've died in our war against those that threaten our ways of life.” A moment later a piano, and violins started to play.
A beautiful looking construct appeared amidst the formation of musicians. “It only takes one lone soul, it only takes one in a thousand.” Oh.. oh I remember this song! This was tranquility! I heard it from an anime I used to watch during my teenage years. Ginga Eiyuu Densetsu: Die Neue These. The legends of the galactic heroes. Gosh. That's a throwback….
“No, that's not bravery
As children we learn it's wrong
To put out the light of another
Our innocence lost over time
A means to an end” Hearing those words felt so healing. It put me both in a good and cathartic mood. It felt like my soul was being soothed.
“It's hard to hold your head up high, But we must try” suddenly the banging of bass dropped. Two beats, next one beat. It repeated.
“Sway together in the dark It's supposed to be,
'Cause I want to know the end And you never ever need to fight
But you're fighting everyday And I don't know when your light will go out
Innocent crying child, The heart of your enemy”
“My heart to heart with the light And we always get along
Counting the stars in the sky Thinking why they have to die!
Just face to face we can hear A voice telling us it's wrong.
Counting the stars in the sky It was like a lullaby.”
“For sunsets I'll break the rules We learnt playing down in the heather
The secrets behind all the veils We just use other words
For freedom we make our charge For friendship we bare down on others
Can't one of you just calculate Tranquility?”
“It's hard to hold your head up high But we must try”
“Ah, ah, Ah, ah, Ah, ah”
“Sway together in the dark It's supposed to be
'Cause I want to know the end And you never ever need to fight
But you're fighting everyday And I don't know when your light will go out
Innocent crying child The heart of your enemy”
“Sway together in the dark It's supposed to be
'Cause I want to know the end And you never ever need to fight
But you're fighting everyday And I don't know when your light will go out
Innocent crying child The heart of your enemy”
“My heart to heart with the light And we always get along
Counting the stars in the sky Thinking why they have to die!
Just face to face we can hear A voice telling us it's wrong
Counting the stars in the sky It was like a lullaby….” The crowd cheered at the performance given to them. The performer bowed, smiling doing so. I was left speechless as the music made me feel so emotionally vulnerable. Yet it felt so good. It's a paradox. I then looked at Nau who was shedding tears at the performance. Right after this the music changed, and they started to march towards the final destination. Right now they were singing uptown funk and it started raining moonshine, and booze. The surrounding felt so funky, and lively whilst the song played. I took off my mask quickly, and gathered some drops of rain to taste. It literally tasted like beer, and a bit of moonshine.
Nau then pulled my arms, and followed the parade. Under the mask I smiled. I followed her. Whilst following the parade I saw one of the hatches of those spider mechanized units open only to see a person crawl off it. The person eerily looked like my father but the difference was his more grizzled face, and a scar on the left eye. He wore some sort of general or officer's uniform with a patch similar to those people wearing the torch insignia's. Looking closer the doppelganger had a more robotic body so it can't be him. He's probably just a look a like. Suddenly the person looked around, and eyed me directly. Looking surprised when he saw me. Suddenly his face turned to both anger, and pity. Like I just pissed him off like I reminded him of something. When our eyes locked at each other I could see his eyes burn with a fiery azure passion when he saw me. He then tried to pull something out of his pocket but stopped. Suddenly he muttered something. He then looked away, and crawled back into the unit.
After a while the parade finally arrived at the destination. The press gathered around the venue seemingly like someone important was going to make an appearance. Currently we were in front of an arena. But unlike your normal arena this one dwarved even the Olympic stadiums. It looks like some sort of simulation arena for wargames. Something akin to the tank triathlon which is held in large open fields where tank crews and commanders outmaneuver each other with their expertise, and tanks. NATO holds them, even the Northern Russian Artic Parliament (N.R.A.P) holds them.
“Hey! Nau! Over here!” Someone shouted amidst the crowd. I looked around only to be dragged by her. When she finally stopped someone greeted me.
“Well if isn't Kyruger. Long time no see.” A woman a little higher than Nau, and much more younger greeted me. She had light green hair, pristine almost gemstone looking skin that was almost transparent, with the same greenish eyes, but unlike her sister she was quite petite.
“Who are you?” I asked.
“Oh yeah you must've forgot. Well I'm Catherine. You used to hang out with my older sister back in the day. You're quite a lucky guy. Big sis over here wai-” suddenly Nau covered her mouth.
“Shut it.” Cath gulped, and slowly nodded seemingly afraid of her older sister.
“Well How long have you, and my sister been dating?” She asked, and suddenly Nau elbowed me in the side. Ow that hurt.
“Well… For 5 months before she brought me here.” I lied, and Nau smiled maliciously. Oddly enough I was turned on by that smile. A moment later the speakers roared to life as someone was trying to make a speech.
“Hello our galactic neighbors. Hello, I Am G-4 Able. I'm quite honored to talk to you today. It's our 57th year since we were able to colonize a place, and our debut as regional power and a year after the armistice between the coalition, and the initiative. As you know the current affairs in human controlled territory between the coalition, and the initiative has warmed up. This parade has shown despite our differences we can still arrive at an agreement. Although in recent times the directive of the initiative has slowly changed. From multiple Borsch reactor meltdowns in Kazakhstan, and some parts in the Caucasus due to governmental mismanagement. I hereby rewrite the main directive of the initiative. Alongside the coalition our main directive has changed. From protecting the veil, to protecting what normalcy is left. I know. I know.” The people around us talked seemingly enamored by the local geopolitics of humans. I was also interested since this was world charging news.
“Humanity has always tried to suppress the knowledge of the anomalous but right now there are pressing matters. Keeping the veil is useless especially in the current information age that we found ourselves in. You already know that considering the Serpent's Maw leaks information about the anomalous. Currently A.I can't stop the spread of information, and unfortunately it has caused widespread confusion, and chaos in Earth. The Artic Parliament has already started to show signs of collapse, and eastern Europe has already fallen to widespread protests calling for freedom of information acts. To the foreign dignitaries I must ask you all for assistance in speeding up Project Dawn. Currently Project Dawn is nearly complete but it would take 3 more months for the civilian ships are made. And the other G-11 council members are currently worried that if we tried evacuating some parts of earth using military craft it would cause widespread chaos. Essentially causing confusion, and riots as barely anyone knows what's happening causing more casualties than needed.” Suddenly more people around me started to get worried.
“Shit. That's a bad thing….. the more people killed the more likely another large scale rainfall event happens.” I heard one of the people on the crowd say.
The skies suddenly reddened, and an unnatural aurora borealis appeared amidst the former clear skies.
“SHIT! RAINFALL EVENT!” The crowd panicked, and a stampede happened. People pushed each other killing some civilians in order to hide themselves from this ‘Rainfall event’.
“ATTENTION ALL INITIATIVE PERSONNEL! ACTIVE RAINFALL EVENT HAS BEEN DETECTED. CULL THE SIRENS! I REPEAT CULL THE SIRENS!” G-4 shouted through the speakers.
Around me, people pushed each other, afraid of what's to come. Some kept shouting, others crying, whilst some were trampled to death. Nau, and her sis were separated from me, whilst I was trampled.
My consciousness started to fade as people trampled over my body. Faintly I could hear the faint breaths of those who are being trampled to death. Some gasped for help, some cursed at the people that trampled them.
“Remember. Don't try to let yourself be seen by the sirens. Hide. Don't make a sound. Remember. Daddy loves you…” Dad ruffled my hair, and quickly rushed outside to distract the monsters outside. Before he left he locked the attic trapdoor. Gunshots echoed through the air.
"COME AT ME YOU SUICIDAL ECHOES! FUCK YOU!” Dad shouted.
Outside my father tried to fight off the creature made of azure liquids. Outside the demonic sounds of tormented souls screeching echoed. I looked out at the attic window, only to see him being swarmed by the azure monsters. Gunshot after gunshot he tried to fight them off.
"KILLL UUSSSSSSS!!!! PLEAAAASSSSEEEEEE!!!” When the gun finally ran out of ammo he quickly ran to try, and divert the monsters away from the house. But right after he tried this, the monsters lunged at him, and pinned him down, bludgeoning him. After a minute of struggle dad’s body went limp. Right after that happened the monsters threw up a viscous blue liquid, and shoved it to his throat. The moment this happened, his body convulsed, and he woke up. But unlike how he normally is, his eyes looked so depressed. He then laughed, and started to smash his head on the pavement only for him to heal the wounds. Suddenly he made a guttural roar.
“GRAAAAAHHHHHH!” A monster in the shape of my father screamed. Suddenly the monster that was formerly my father noticed me from the window, and made a B line towards me. I pointed a gun at the trapdoor. Footsteps echoed through the house. I stayed my best to stay silent but was found. The trapdoor shook as something tried to forcibly open it up. After a while of loud shaking the trapdoor finally broke. A bloodied head came through the door. The thing that was once my father now looked at me with a homicidal gaze. Both of our eyes locked with each other. He then made a guttural screech.
“D-don't come closer!” I shouted, my hands trembling. My child like hands shook as I was afraid, and didn't know what was happening. The figure’s eyes locked on to me, smiling creepily. A moment later the creature lunged at me. I pulled the trigger multiple times but the creature still mauled me even if it had taken lethal amounts of damage.
“Help….. me…..” As I was nearing my death, azure liquids leaked from the roof, and some of the liquid dropped into my mouth. The last thing I heard was something akin to glass shattering. Right after that my mind blacked out.
“When humans doubt God, they are considered to have independent selves...but what happens when a doll doubts its manufacturer?” I looked directly at the CCTV maliciously smiling at the fact that when mom sees this she would be distraught. She deserves it. She deserves all of the pain…. It was agonizing having your soul recreated. It was like being put together, and broken again. Over, and over. In the span of months. I was nothing but a doll to her. A doll to relive her nostalgia of the past. To relive a tragedy…
My dad pointed a gun on my jaw as per my request.
“Pull it.” I smiled as he pulled the trigger. A gunshot rang through the air. The last thing I saw was dad running away. His Human yet robotic like visage ran farther and farther from me. Smiling as the nightmare finally ended.
“I should've killed that bitch when I had the chance. Tsk. I should've known this would happen.” I groggily opened my eyes only to see the doppelganger of my dad pointing a gun at my head. He looked like he was ready to pull the trigger. I quickly got up, and tried to disarm him only to get shot in the liver. The parts of the gas mask I was wearing fell to the ground as what was left essentially is shattered from the stampede.
To my surprise I didn't bleed. He quickly grabbed a knife from a compartment in his arm, and tried to stab me in the neck. What the fuck.
My body quickly moved by its own, and disarmed him. I then tried to dislocate his arm. His metallic prosthetic arm showing cracks as I forcefully elbowed the prosthetic. He frowns.
Suddenly a gunshot rang through the air, and his shoulder fragmented.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU! WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL A CIVILIAN?! THERE'S SUPPOSED TO BE A SIREN ATTACK! WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL A CIVILIAN?!” I looked behind me only to see Nau holding a dragonov. She quickly fired another shot but was blocked by his knife.
“Tsk. You have nothing to do with this. Stop this foolishness.”
“What are you talking about?” He laughs. Whilst he was distracted I tried to get his gun but was quickly elbowed on the neck, numbing it, and making me feel nothing and unable to move. Nau clicked her tongue, and started to shoot him.
“Fine… I'll finish this later…”
“I'll free you from the nightmare….”
“Son.” He quickly ran away, but before he fully retreated he shot me in the left eye. Plastic, glass, and metal shattered, and scattered as the bullet ricochet. A large steel ding was heard because of this. Similar to that of a bullet hitting a steel target and ricocheting.
“Are you o-” she paused as she noticed the glass shards that shattered as my eyes were hit by the bullet fragments.
“I should've known…. Something wasn't right when I slipped some part of me inside of you.”
“Say what now?”
“Nothing.” She quickly tried to carry me but temporarily put me down to put the gun away. She quickly consumed the gun. Oddly enough I thought that was hot. I wish I was the gun….
God I'm starting to develop a vore fetish aren't I? Right after that she grabbed my shoulder, and piggyback carried me.
“Try your best to hang on to dear life, okay?” I faintly nodded. But as I nodded some sort of fluid flowed out of my left eye hole. Right after that my body started to heat up even more.
“Crap you're leaking coolant.” She quickly ripped part of her clothes and shoved those onto my left eye.
“Hang on. I'll try my best to get to a nearby evac zone.” Suddenly in the distance the same screams of the damned echoes through the air. She gritted her teeth, and started to run whilst carrying my body. Whilst she was running. I noticed it started to rain.
“Shit! Another rain!” She quickly threw something up, and grabbed it. Some sort of weapon’s case.
She continued running, but faintly you could almost hear the sound of flowing water akin to that of a flash flood.
“Crap!” She quickly let go of me, and opened the weapons case. When she opened it a giant slab of steel with a muzzle akin to that of a miniature railgun prototype I read about in some article by the BBC back in 2041. Out of her hand, a large cancerous growth appeared. A reddish growth that when it bursted, chunks of reddish mold, and liquid popped like a balloon covering me with what looks to be mucus or blood.

Hello, I’m a 42 year old female with Lynch syndrome and a history of colon cancer. In February, I underwent a complete colectomy IRA, and TAH/BSO. It’s been difficult to say the least. Since it was discovered I have MSH6 mutation for Lynch, my surgeon ordered other tests to be sure we were covering all the bases before surgery. I had a CT scan which showed a bone lesion near my sacro-iliac joint, bilateral lung densities, and cysts on my liver, too many to count. It also stated there were areas of my liver which measured as low as 20 hounsfield units. I saw an oncologist who mentioned possible neuroendocrine tumors on my liver due to specific symptoms, although my liver enzymes are normal. For example, white stools, urq pain, nausea. I had a chromogranin a blood test which was normal. But the test also said no matter the results, that doesn’t include/exclude 100%. I also had a scan of my thyroid bc 2 blood tests 6 months apart showed subclinical hyperthyroidism. I was found to have 2- TR3 and 1 TR5 nodule. I am concerned. I have been experiencing trouble swallowing for approximately a year, possibly more. I wake up choking on my spit sometimes. And it looks like there’s swelling under my chin/neck area. It wasn’t large enough at the time to warrant FNA. I see the endocrinologist in July, but I’m concerned about the combination of surgical menopause, a total colectomy, hyperthyroid and possible thyroid cancer. What are the chances it would be cancer? I have a history of treatment for latent tuberculosis (1984-1985). Lynch Syndrome MSH6 History of CC Thyroid nodule Subclinical hyperthyroidism Surgical menopause Thank you for any response!

My mom was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer that has Mets in her brain, liver, lungs, and bone (basically had no symptoms until it hit her brain) lived an extremely healthy and active lifestyle before this (not saying that if she didn’t this still wouldn’t be so hard) - just looking to see if anyone else is in this situation or caring for someone in a similar situation?

Bare with me as this is my first Reddit post but I am so sad. My (25F) dad (62M) was diagnosed with terminal stage 4 esophageal cancer August 2023. He did chemo but we found out a few days ago that it didn’t work— the cancer grew and spread and they moved him to hospice. They say he has maybe a few months to live but who knows honestly.
It feels so unfair. I feel like I’m living a nightmare I can’t wake up from. Seeing this happen so slow and fast and wishing I could stop it but literally not being able to do anything feels so helpless and torturous. I feel like I’m too young and I especially feel like my dad is too young to have this happen.
My dad never smoked or drank or did anything. He lived a healthy lifestyle and it feels like a cruel joke for him to have cancer in his esophagus, lungs, liver, stomach, etc. like how does this happen?
My mom is also in remission from stage 3 colon cancer and I went through a similar situation with her a couple years ago. I’m so glad she survived but I just can’t believe I have to lose my dad now. I cry everyday and feel like I’ll never be okay. I also fear I will endure the same fate. After seeing how horrible cancer is it’s my biggest fear. I hate cancer. It destroys lives.

Week1: My mother went to the ER on a Monday. They found she had stage 4 colon cancer. It has spread to the liver, stomach, and spleen. They also found 2 blood clots in the lungs. They have her on a strong blood thinner for 1 month to clear the cloths. She was discharged on Friday.
Week 2: first appointment with oncology on Monday. They explained she will have a port put in and start chemo. Had an appointment lined up for Wednesday that was canceled due to waiting on insurance approval. She is very weak. Not eating and not walking.
Week 3: Wednesday has port put in. They did not start chemo this day and can’t start it on a Thursday or Friday. So they made the appointment for Monday. She is still not eating and not walking. She is also losing cognitive function. Totally out of it.
Week 4 (this week): Monday she goes in for an appointment. Couldn’t even stand up. Couldn’t remember her name. They find she is extremely anemic and has very low iron. They cancel all chemo and decided to start immunology treatments instead. They gave her a blood transfusion. Thursday goes in for the immunology treatment and she is in such bad shape they canceled it. She was admitted into the hospital. They found fluid in her lungs and she still has the blood clots.
My father thinks it’s no big deal they keep delaying treatments but it has now been almost a month since she’s been diagnosed and I find it crazy they haven’t started treatments. They keep finding other things wrong they have to treat before starting. At this point she’ll die before they even start. They say “a few days won’t make a difference” everytime there is a delay. A few days has now turned into a few weeks. All my mother does is lay on the couch. She’s lost so much muscle mass she can’t even walk anymore. I’m losing my mind. I’ve never been in this situation before so I don’t know if this is normal or not. She’s getting worse very rapidly. I thought they would be a lot more aggressive at stage 4.

Found out today that my colon cancer has spread to my liver and that I'll therefore need chemotherapy before they do surgery to remove my colon and give me a permanent colostomy (I hope that's the right term in english😅). I don't know exactly when I'll start chemo, I have an appointment tomorrow at the cancer ward at the hospital to get all the information about that, but the doctor today (gastro-something ward, so he didn't know about when the chemo would start etc) said that it will start next week. Is there any specific things I should prepare for? Specific things I should buy that might help with possible side effects? I want to prepare as much as possible, because it helps with my anxiety to control the things I can control and be as prepared as I possibly can be, but I have absolutely no idea how to prepare for this. Any and all help is greatly appreciated!

I finally had my CRS/HIPEC/liver resection surgery. It took almost 12 hours due to extremely dense adhesions (this was my 6th laparotomy) and I lost quite a bit of blood. They kept me asleep on a ventilator until the following day which was a first for me! They removed my spleen, gallbladder, uterus, cervix, rectum, omentum, small bowel resection, liver resection, stripped my peritoneum and refashioned my ileostomy (they were unable to reverse it). My colon and ovaries were removed in previous surgeries so there really is not much left inside me now! My PCI was calculated to be 14. They are happy that they have managed to remove all visible cancer which is just the best news! I spent 2 weeks on hospital and it was a rough old time. I'm home now and recovering slowly. Dealing with some ongoing issues with my few remaining organs (frankly they should be grateful they're even still in there), hopefully these will get better with time. I'm not sure what the next steps are in terms of further chemo etc, for now I'm focusing on healing. So grateful to have been offered this surgery and for it to go so well. :)

I’ve been doing extensive research for my girlfriend who is anemic. She did have fibroids removed some years back, but they have started growing back again. Her cycles are horrible, and end of last year she had to get a blood transfusion (3 bags) to get her back stable, while she was on her cycle.
I had no idea that there were different types of iron supplements, but discovered that heme iron absorbs much better than non heme. Of course the iron pills her doctor gave her are non heme, and she hasn’t been able to get her levels up to where it’s not debilitating.
I found a few heme products out there but am confused, as it states online that an adult with or without iron deficiency should not take more than 150-200mg per day, because too much heme iron or iron in general can cause an increased risk of colon cancer, amongst other not so favorable side effects.
Then some where else I read that the recommended amount for an adult female is 18mg.
All of the products I’ve found, for example “Wholesome Wellness - Grass fed beef liver - capsules” are 750mg per capsule, and they say to take 4-6 capsules per day. That’s way above what I read about the daily limit for heme iron intake. Or am I confusing beef liver as a whole with actual heme iron?
Again I’m confused, and could use some guidance for anyone out there who’s been successful with heme iron supplements.
Thank you in advance!

I moved abroad in 2021, and Jan 2023 was when i heard the words i dreaded- "dad has cancer" from mom. colon cancer that spread to the liver. i'm 22 and i'm so scared. it's been a rough year. i went and stayed with them for a month but i feel so guilty. everything is so fucked up. I'm from a messed up country and won't be able to do much if i go back.i'm so so scared. he's been going through chemo and meds, recently things have been so tough. he's not getting any better, and mom told me she's losing hope. i can't decide what to do anymore. my siblings are no better either(they're in late 30s).i appreciate any advice.