Fun questions to ask a boy

We recently replaced the shower head and knob (which was leaking) in an upstairs shower a few days ago. It just came to our attention that the hot water is not coming out of the tap of the powder room directly below the shower. The shower is getting hot water, and the plumber didn't even touch the powder room although he did shut off all water into the house at the time.
Any ideas on what could be the culprit?
Is this a DIY fix or do we need to track down the independent plumber who has been dodging us on a different question we asked him?

Hi Reddit. I’m a 19 M and have been having a consistent argument with my parents for a while.
I never wanted to go to college because I thought it was a waste of money. I was homeschooled since 3rd grade and in that time had an opportunity to do dual enrollment but my mom said for some reason I couldn’t when in reality she misunderstood a counselor and I could since I was like 15/16. So basically while one of my friends went ahead and became a nurse I never got to do anything like that to get ahead.
From 17-19 I’ve basically worked 32+ hours a week doing full time jobs from irrigation to chipotle to cleaning offices to now working front desk at a hotel.
I’ve been wanting to learn a “trade” so I recently went with graphic design a couple months ago and began taking an online course. I’ve been very consistent with it but it’s very tiring working a 9-5 four days a week on top of taking care of my physical health as I love weightlifting and also helping my parents out with cooking/running errands etc. and after all that make sure I have time to learn my course.
I have really bad ADHD and have even tried meds but they gave me headaches. So recently I’ve tried asking them if I can just do 3 days of work and spend the other 4 learning as I already have no social life and don’t even play video games or do anything for fun tbh.
They’re saying I spent too long on what I wanted to do as a trade and if I wanna be a man I now have to work full time and figure it out because it’s what they had to do as teens. I’ve tried explaining I’m exhausted mentally and physically and can’t maintain this I feel like I’m going nowhere. They keep saying “welcome to being an adult”.
I’m so confused and just want to learn for my future but they won’t let me. I’m getting pissed and I don’t know what to do. AITAH

My husband and I have been together for 5 years and married for 1. After we were married I found out that he had been talking to numerous women behind my back. Not one of these conversations were appropriate and were sexual in nature. He has now begged for me to give him a second chance and has repeatedly apologized. I have told him that we need to have marriage counseling to attempt to save our marriage. He called a couple and gave up because no one had any openings. Now he wants to go on a guys trip out of the state. I'm really hurt that he would even ask since our marriage is on thin ice. I'm so frustrated that he is taking this time to plans a guys trip instead of attempting to save our marriage. I told him that I wasn't comfortable with it and now he's telling me that I didn't trust him even prior to cheating ( I have always trusted him). He compares me to his friends wives who are letting them go have fun. Not only have we not had marriage counseling we never even had a honeymoon and now a guys trip has become his priority. I want to be able to trust him but I'm not ready too. Shouldn't our marriage take precedence?

Was going to ask a question here to see if anyone has insight. We are getting an inground pool installed within the next few weeks. Our leach drain field for septic was in the way of where the pool was gonna go, so we had new pipes installed to another area. The old pipes are still there, but the company that did it said it wouldn’t be a big deal when the pool company digs. The pool company is now telling me that the old field should be removed before they dig. I don’t see why they couldn’t remove the old pipe since they’re already digging in that spot. Just wondering if anyone has went through this and had some insight. Thank you.

So I am working on an application and this question is on it. Now the short answer is yes, I was terminated from another position.
The long story is I was asked to resign by my manager at an old job due to perceived dissatisfaction with my work quality (I say perceived because I discussed with another coworker and they were shocked there was a problem with my work, after they reviewed it). I looked for a new job before I had to resign (I was given until June or I would be terminated) and I got one in a completely different field, much more inline with my talents and passions. I could've just resigned and moved on but since I was taking about a 20k paycut, I let them terminate me so I would get a nice severance (it is a big company so I have no qualms about this)
Now I want to make sure I answer enough that they aren't upset by it but also not word vomit on the answer and make them just ignore it. Any advice?

Hello! Curious to know if anyone has been in similar situation. 4 days ago I had my pre-op EGD. The doc at the end said he was concerned because there was still food in my stomach despite not eating for 12 hours at that point. He stated we’ll have to do extra testing with a tracer.
This was Friday and I haven’t been able to get ahold of anyone in the office to follow up and ask more questions.
Anybody have any issues pre-op with this and still been green lighted for surgery? I’m starting to get very anxious…

Hello it’s me again, I’d like to thank everyone who read or skimmed my idea. The few upvotes I recieved gave me the courage to keep going with this idea and expand on Emerald’s story a bit more. I do admit that Rayleigh may be out of character since I haven’t gotten to that part of the One Piece series and only seen glimpses of him. So like before, I do implore you to give me feedback and criticisms that I can make to make this story better. Anyways, this is part 2. Please enjoy.
Flashes and flickers pop in and out of Emerald’s head. The abuse, visions of everything and anyone fleeing from his feral state, the laughter of his captors and new master ring in his head. The scorching pain of the branding and his screams fill his mind, and overwhelm his senses. In his mind he begs for it to end, crying, whimpering for it to stop, then he hyperventilates as the noises get louder and louder into a crescendo of pure noise. Then in a desperate cry he shouts to the heavens for it to stop. Enough!! He then springs awake on the floor screaming it, cold sweats as he began to process where he was. He began to look around frantically believing he is still in danger. His breath still hoarse, and his hairs standing on end, not noticing the changes that happened to him.
Rayleigh would come forward and greet Emerald with a light tease, however in his trauma induced fright, he got up and immediately went to fight Rayleigh without thinking. Emerald would use electro, his speed and strength, everything, but none of it would have come close to hitting Rayleigh. He continued this frantic and single minded onslaught while Rayleigh would dodge, block, or deflect Emerald’s attacks until he tired himself out. The mink would continue this, and while the Dark King knowing this was a response to his trauma, just waited until he wasted his stamina. Emerald in this rampage would only be reopening his wounds, causing him to hesitate and grasp at his wounds. He sat down realizing he would lose blood if he continued, and just started to back away. Rayleigh would approach in a calm and gentle manner, remarking on his performance. Emerald still did not trust him one bit however, still displaying a defensive stance while one arm held his wound. The Dark King would explain his intrigue and interest in him, explaining how he found him lying on the ground half dead in the rubble of the slavery base. He would remark that it was a rare thing that a mink would have left Zou much less a devil fruit. Minks were already pretty strong on their own thus the devil fruit created an intriguing question to his mind. Rayleigh would also note that Emerald was in his hybrid state, prompting the bunny to look at himself. his hands felt normal, only bruised and scarred due to his experiences, but then he looked at his tail. It was longer, segmented with a stinger-like end point. looking at this, he begins to become confused and his vision splits 8 ways. Confusing and even disorienting him causing him to fall back onto the ground.
Rayleigh would allow him to process these emotions, understanding that slavery was not something to take lightly. Not to mention he was still sorting out his emotions. He would then place a hand on Emerald’s shoulder, to which he would instinctively point the stinger at Rayleigh, but he wouldn’t move an inch. He attempted to lighten the mood, saying that he could very well be the first Mink to ever have eaten a zoan type devil fruit, however it didn’t do much to comfort him. He would ask the mink how he made his way down from Zuneesha, and Emerald would explain that he snuck into a guests ship. Rayleigh nods, and asks if he would like to return home. Emerald would refuse, and say that he wanted to explore the world outside of his home, to which the man would question him. He would ask Emerald as to what plan he had, to which the mink would remain silent. Rayleigh would explain that the world was full of dangers, perils and beings who would kill him without a second though. He humored the bravery, the foolhardy and naive nature of his, but he needed to be able to defend himself now that he was outside because minks were prized as collectables. Now that he ate a devil fruit, people would kill to capture him and put him back into the life he found himself. Or potentially kill him, deeming him too dangerous.
Rayleigh said that it didn’t have to be that way however. He would offer the young Mink a choice, he would train him, allowing him to cope and have closure with his trauma and master something called Haki. Allowing him to close the gap between him and those who wish him harm if he had conviction. The only caveat was that he wouldn’t go easy on him, and he would put him through the wringer. The other was helping him back a home, let him mature and have Emerald’s peers help him cope and train in his own way. However, he stated that his devil fruit was something he needed to figure out himself in either scenario. As well as he didn’t want Emerald to come back so soon, asking he took his time healing. The mink would would ponder this decision, his mind filled with anxiety and nervousness as the experiences he had rang in his head once again. But something began to fester from that dark place, a desire, a wish to never go to that life ever again. He would do whatever it takes to never go through that pain ever again. Thus he would stand, looking at Rayleigh and say that he wants to stay; saying that he never wants to go through that again, and that no one would stop him from seeing the world. Rayleigh would smile, it was a naive goal, but it was a goal nonetheless. The dark King says that he would help him and that training will begin when his wounds heal enough…..
There you have it, if you have read through this story till the end, then you are the best and I genuinely appreciate you reading this story. This has been fun to ponder about and act out in my head, my friend urges me to read the manga and while I am I can’t stop thinking about this. This is a lot of fun! For now I intend to write out Emerald’s training in terms of Haki and his goals in this world in the future. Keep those upvotes coming and please do leave feedback and criticisms, I really do want to read what you all have to say about it. If it sucks, then thats okay, if its good then great, i really just want to write good stories. I may also write full stories about these events as of now they are simply ideas in my head. Well enough rambling from me, thank you for reading and I’ll keep writing. Bye bye!

Managing diabetes in the hospital setting
Hi guys. I'm a new intern in internal medicine, currently on my night float rotation and have been getting a lot of calls about blood sugars on the wards, and asked to make certain management decisions on it. I usually ask my senior if I'm unsure, but I'd like to work out a good way to reason through these situations so I can make these calls more confidently on my own and bug them less often.
(1) So on night float, patients are often NPO at midnight for a minor procedure in the morning such as stress tests, TEEs etc. Nurses will often call me, noticing the patient has a large QHS glargine dose and ask whether to give it, give less of it, or place the patient on D5.
I've looked online for any sort of guidelines and can't seem to find anything clear and concrete about cutting the night time glargine. Some places say you leave it alone, while others seem to say you halve it, others are saying you only reduce it to 70-80%.
Is there a concrete, evidence-based consensus I can refer to?
Some of the nurses are also consistently asking me to place the patient on D5 1/2 NS on night float for patients NPO for a procedure the next day. My immediate concern is that this would simply provoke hyperglycemia. Considering from midnight until procedure, the most they will miss is one meal or two during the day of the procedure, it makes most sense to me intuitively that I'd just hold the pre-meal asparts. Is it common practice to put NPO-at-midnight patients on D5?
(2) I got called one morning about a patient who was due for a pre-meal aspart, however his blood sugar was 128. The patient had not eaten yet. My initial thought is that if the patient was going to eat, with that blood sugar it should be totally fine to administer the aspart. My resident at the time advised I hold it, however. The timing of the call was also strange, since it was at 7 am, yet breakfast would probably not be for another hour or two (per the same nurse)...which makes me wonder if they're timing it right. Naturally, nurses are busy, especially in the morning, and perfect timing is not realistic, but my understanding is you should administer pre-meal aspart 0-15 minutes before meals or immediately after. So my question is, when do you hold the pre-meal aspart in the person who is about to eat? If it is common practice to give the pre-meal aspart so way in advance of the meals, what do I tell the nurses?

So after seeing this thread a couple weeks ago, my group is looking to play the Midnight in China script.
https://www.reddit.com/BloodOnTheClocktowecomments/1couczv/chinese_community_botc_homebrew/ https://www.bloodstar.xyz/p/ChinHoYiu/HuaDengChuShang/almanac.html
We need 1 player to run it, but more are welcome. We play using Discord + Clocktower.live . We'll talk about the new characters and go through any rules questions together before we start. We are a very chill group, lots of skill levels, and our goal is always to have fun.
This would be at 8:15PM EST, so just a little less than two hours from now!
If you have any questions, feel free to ask here or DM me, but for a server invite please DM me directly.

So... I play an MMO, won't be too specific because I know the people this is about use Reddit and I don't want them to start MORE drama with me. And in this MMO, you can have "Free Companies" (Real subtle, I know) that are in game guilds that you and your friends can be a part of.
Now, I used to be a party of a fully active FC and friend group and they are the ones who introduced me to this MMO. One of my friends owned this FC (we will call him R) but within the friend group, a bit if drama went down and about half the FC sided with the owner (I was one of them) and the other sided with the one who started the drama (We will call him P). Now, R never kicked P from the FC and P and his gang never logged on again until a few days ago and left the FC himself to make his own FC.
The drama started last year.
Now, after the drama went down, activity in the FC died down, eventually resulting in me being the only one playing for months. Now when the Owner remains offline for a certain period, ownership will pass down to the last active person, that being me. Now when this was brought up, I made it clear that if R wants me to transfer ownership back to him, I will do so no problem, however, every time he said he didn't care and that he will leave it up to me. Eventually no one but me logged in and they claimed that they lost passion for the game because of the drama.
Seeing as no one was playing and that if everyone remains inactive, FC house will be destroyed, I chose to retain ownership, still expressing I will give ownership back if R asked.
I should also explain (I swear this is relevant) I am sort of the punching bag of our group, often being made fun of (Not in a friendly way) and I pretty often have to take breaks from them because they make me very emotionally vulnerable (As much as I hate to admit that) and often claim that I "stole the FC from R" they also claimed that I "demoted" them in the FC but I never touched their ranks, they got demoted by the game for inactivity.
Fast forward 6 months and I log on one day to see that everyone was leaving the FC. Once I saw that R had left, I DM'd him and asked him why he left and if there is any objects in the FC he wants me to keep for him since I thought they were just going to make their own FC. He told me he wasn't going to make a new FC and said that he left because the FC "just represented 2 splits with old friends, so I don't really like looking at it no more" and that, to me, was the last time I questioned if he wanted the FC back.
Moving forward to today, I found out that one of the people who was on R's side joined P's new FC when he logged back on a few days ago. Now, I made a joke about him being our spy to which he said "Bros talking to me like I'm on good terms with him when he took R's FC" to which I pointed out that ownership was defaulted to me and I was even given permission from R to retain ownership; all he could reply with was a gif saying "I ain't reading all that" and after 3 years of constant "bullying" and antagonising from them, and being told I stole the FC and them acting like I'm everyone's enemy, I can't help but feel like maybe it's me that is in the wrong?
So, AITAH for taking ownership of an inactive FC and then when I asked if the original owner wanted it back, he said no?

Okay, so for this post there are a lot of people involved (this has been going on for a while) so I'll list up here who's who. This is my wife's family. I'll be using code names when appropriate:
Father-in-law - FIL
Mother-in-law - MIL
Wife(oldest daughter) - Wife
Second daughter - Sarah
Third daughter - Lana
Fourth daughter - Ruth
Second daughter's husband - BIL
Third daughter's fiancee - Karl
My daughter - daughter
Second daughter's older son - Danny
Second daughter's younger son - Aaron
And me as me
I know this is long but bear with me TL;DR Brother-in-law has snapped the last straw for the family and we are all starting to cut ties with him

 BIL's family has their own side of the story that I'm barely familiar with, so it won't be brought up here. We first met BIL way before they got together; Sarah bought a house as a group of friends with her boyfriend at the time, and BIL and his second wife at the time. We didn't interact with him much. We just heard a few stories about him from their friend group. Eventually this situation broke down and BIL and his second wife left and vandalized Sarah's home on the way out. They let their dogs poop all over the floor, stole some miscellaneous items, poured water in their lawn mower gas tank, etc. He did this to Sarah, his future third wife. We thought this guy was out of our lives forever. Sarah eventually came to stay on my couch after she sold the house. She lived with me and my wife for roughly 3 months. Then she went and rented an apartment a few miles away. No sooner than a few weeks did we find out she was dating future BIL, and a few weeks after that we found she was pregnant. He met the family and stated that he wanted to be a part of it. He blamed all his past transgressions on his second wife. We questioned him at the time if he was still with his second wife. He said no, and that he was officially divorced. My wife looked up the public court records and found out that he didn't file divorce papers until 11 days after we asked that question. A small lie but considering our history of knowing him it was concerning. BIL is a big gun enthusiast. About 1 months after they told us Sarah was pregnant, while cleaning a gun at home he shot himself in the hand. Again, we were concerned but Sarah assured us he was a changed man and this was just an unfortunate accident. His hand healed but he didn't do his physical therapy that seriously so his hand is still kind of jacked up. I feel this is important because he kind of has a history of not following through on what he says. During Sarah's pregnancy we found out that BIL seriously beat one of their dogs back when they bought the house together. We also figured out he diagnosed himself with bipolar, but refused to go to a doctor to get an actual diagnosis. The whole family at the time was distracted by all of this because during Sarah's pregnancy my wife went through a major medical struggle that resulted in multiple surgeries and a months-long stay in the hospital. We were so focused on that the BIL details just kind of came and went at that moment. Sarah gave birth to Danny during COVID lockdown. We were so excited and we all were very active in Danny's life. Time would pass and we just kind of got used to BIL being despite the fact that he often would miss family events. BIL and Sarah would move into a house on my in-laws property just down the road from in-laws house. MIL became their primary caregiver as she could work it around her job and still make decent money. As 4 years have passed my MIL, FIL, Lana, my Wife and I all take shifts of watching their now 2 kids for them, for free. MIL also watches my daughter but significantly less that their son's. 2 years would pass after Danny was born and everything seemed OK. There would just be hints in they way he talked about who he really was. He would say something in casual conversation like "man, there seems like there are too many black people in commercials these days" or "I don't know why we are forcing women's sports to be a thing." Bigoted stuff like that, but veiled enough so there was plausible deniability. I would often call him out on it, so he really grew to not like me. This all changed at his 30th bday. He had a big party with a lot of alcohol and weed with dozens of friends. My wife and I didn't go because we are not party people. Lana and Ruth went to the party. Sarah was also there. During this party BIL went outside and decided to "mud" his jeep through the creek beside their house. This was possibly with Karl but I'm not sure of that to this day. Karl has recently come into the picture prior to this event and was previously friends with BIL for a long time. The jeep got stuck and flooded for obvious reasons. After trying to get it out of the creek by multiple means, they gave up and left it there. I believe it took almost 2 days to get it out. He went back to the party and as everyone got progressively drunk and high, my 2 sister-in-laws Lana and Ruth (I believe) criticized BIL for getting his car stuck in a creek while playing. BIL verbally assaulted them and demanded they get out of his house. They left in tears. They drove separately, and Lana had gotten buzzed so they both got in Ruth's car and drove to my house. They sat and vented to my wife and I for a while, and eventually I offered that we should go do something fun to take their minds off of it. My wife and I drove them to Taco Bell and we got some food and drove around town for a while and made jokes in the car. After they cooled off and were in a better mood they said that Lana needed to go get her car from the party. In a flurry she accidentally left her keys inside her sister's and BIL's house. We drove them over just in case anything sketchy happened but Lana and Ruth didn't want us to go inside, so we waited out in the car. She didn't think it would be a big deal to walk in, but as her and Ruth did BIL immediately got in her face and demanding she gets out or else. Ruth went to talk to someone else at the party and didn't notice this at first. BIL shoved Lana against a wall and held her there. Everyone apparently stood in stunned silence as this happened. He then shoved her to the ground, grabbed her around the ankles and started pulling her across the floor. As he was threatening to do even worse, Ruth ran up and jumped on his back and gave him a head lock. She screamed at him to stop but before BIL could anything about this everyone finally woke up and pulled them apart. Ruth helped Lana up and they ran out of the house onto the front porch sobbing. My wife saw this and got out of the car and yelled at them to get back in our car. We drove up to the in-laws house. By then it was past midnight. MIL was about an hour away working her job and FIL was up in his room asleep. The sisters went and woke him up and explained the situation through tears. They also called MIL to inform her of the situation. He got ready and ask me to go with him down to the house to get some answers. The sisters stayed up at the house. We drove down in his car and when we got out the entire party was ready for us and greeted us at the car. Literally over a dozen people, most of whom I did not recognize started screaming what happened at both of us simultaneously. Everyone was clearly very drunk. FIL looked overwhelmed, so I raised my hands and tried asking everyone to stop for a second and go one by one telling their bit of the story. BIL stopped me mid sentence and pointed his finger in my face. I noticed he had his other hand on a holstered hand gun. He yelled out "You don't have a say here! You're barely even part of this family." For context, I had been with my wife for over 11 years at that time and he hadn't even married Sarah yet and had been there about 2 1/2 years. FIL backed up and told me that I need to stop talking and that I was being a problem. I backed off and went over the yard to Sarah and Karl. I asked Sarah what happened and she told me that she didn't see what happened and that she wasn't very aware of what was going on now. Karl would barely answer the same question. I walked back over to FIL but he told me to back off and that I really wasn't needed there. Admittedly I felt pretty insulted and just decided to walk back to his house and get my car and go home with my wife. We eventually left after FIL came back to the house. We found out later that BIL had pulled his gun out and threatened to kill himself if FIL didn't leave. Out of fear of what he would do, my in-laws were pretty afraid to take action at this point. A lot of the situation was his word against someone else's and Sarah went on a tour around to the friends and convinced them not to take any of this to the police. She then tried to smooth things over with the family and offered that BIL would apologize to everyone. He then refused, stating that Ruth was the real aggressor and that she assaulted him. He eventually agreed to apologize to just FIL for causing a problem and I think some half-hearted apologies to Lana and Ruth. The whole situation was swept under the rug but an unease has existed over the family since then. He stopped coming to family events pretty much altogether. About 4 months after this situation, prior to my daughter being born, he told MIL he was going to bring Danny up to their house so she could watch him for a few hours while he took a nap. His job works long hours so this wasn't out of the ordinary. However, he didn't show up for a while and my MIL started questioning what going on. She called but there was no answer. She drove down to his house and knocked but there wasn't an answer, only Danny crying in the background. She let herself in and found BIL asleep on the couch with Danny actively trying to wake him up. MIL tried to wake him up but nothing for a few minutes. She gave up and wrote a note to let him know where Danny was. BIL didn't notice Danny was gone for 2 hours. He finally woke up, drove up to in-laws house, and yelled at my MIL for just taking Danny without informing him. He took Danny and then left. A few months after that, after my daughter was born, He fell asleep while watching Danny again. This time we found out because when he woke up the front door was open and Danny was gone. He called in-laws for help finding him. My in-laws have a large property (about 200 acres) with a ton of it forested. Danny wandered 1/4 of a mile into the woods and I believe it took roughly a little over an hour to find him. Family questioned him hard this time but he just recoiled back into their house and didn't talk to us much. Sarah continued to defend him and said it was just an accident. Again the police were not notified about any of this. There was always this idea that if we went to authorities about any of this they would just run for it. They would then surprise everyone with the news that they were pregnant again, despite the fact that Sarah had used the morning after pill. This whole time they hadn't married yet. They announced that they were getting married but Sarah told Lana that it was mostly just to help BIL not have to go through bankruptcy a second time. I wasn't sure if this would do anything to help that situation, but that's what Sarah said at one point leading up to the wedding. About a month before the wedding, however, he threatened Sarah that if she insisted on inviting my wife to the wedding he would demand to invite a friend of his that Sarah hated. This friend also used to date BIL I believe. This was his ploy to force Sarah to not invite my Wife or me. The 2 other sisters and MIL all stood in solidarity with us and said that they would also not go if we weren't invited. He eventually relented and they got married a little before Aaron was born. As more kids were added, MIL's childcare duties got much harder. Eventually my wife and I started paying her (not much but something at least. $150 a month) to watch our daughter, but we also did chores for her, bought her food often, and eventually my Wife started taking a few shifts to watch all 3 children. To date, BIL and Sarah have never compensated any of us for our work. It's a little frustrating but we've tried to understand because Sarah and BIL seem to be bad with money. They objectively make more than us yet can't afford to pay MIL anything. Last Thanksgiving, in the middle of dinner, Sarah and BIL decided to have an "intervention" and talk about how we were not treating BIL fairly. They addressed everybody but really honed in on me specifically. This seemed to be because the rest of the family kind of dance in eggshells around them, while to be frank I'm pretty honest about how I feel about them. They seemed to think I was causing the family to turn against him and questioned why I would do that. I told him he lacked humility. He said he didn't understand. I told him that if he admitted to his mistakes and actually apologized about any of the stuff I previously wrote, instead of blaming everyone and everything else then the whole family would feel a bit different about him. A lot of talk was about the 30th b-day and other times when I just ignored him and how he had already apologized about the party. I reminded him that he didn't apologize to most of the family and he blamed Ruth. He then stated that Ruth was the cause of a lot of the problems at that party. He also made a big deal about how the family doesn't trust him with my daughter and kept emphasizing how he has never held her. We finally tried to come to an agreement. I told him I would try to talk to him more and try to understand him better and he said he would try to come to family events more. He also wanted more of a relationship with my daughter. We left and my wife and I were skeptical but we said that if this is who Sarah really wanted to be with, as long as BIL wasn't perceived as a threat he could have more contact with our daughter. We have had way more of a relationship with his kids than he has had with our daughter so I tried to sympathize with that imbalance. Karl also stated later that having known BIL for a long time, he thought he was very sincere. To date, BIL has not asked or tried at any family events to spend any time with my daughter, despite having numerous opportunities. Now to the current situation. About a month ago Lana and Karl announced that Lana was pregnant. This was a revelation due to Lana having a medical condition that made it harder to get pregnant. A lot of excitement was brewing in the family because of this. Karl has been seeming like a good partner to Lana, and proposed to her a little before the pregnancy happened. This is especially pertinent because Lana and Karl moved into a house together right beside BIL and Sarah. A few days ago they were over at Sarah and BIL's house when an argument broke out between Sarah and BIL. BIL demanded that Sarah wasn't an "obedient enough wife" and that if she wanted there marriage to work then she was going to have to get better at serving him. She was upset and they weren't coming to an agreement so he was going to leave, but apparently he was very high so Sarah refused to give him the keys to his car. He got extremely mad and then got a gun, held it to his head, and threatened to kill himself if she didn't hand over the keys. Fortunately, Danny and Aaron were taking a nap during all of this. Sarah called the police during this whole exchange and the operator heard a lot of what BIL said over the phone so based on that they arrived at the house. He apparently drove away and it took the police a bit to find him but once they did he turned himself over. They admitted him to a mandatory 72-hour stay at a psychiatric ward for a mental health assessment. Sarah then came up to the rest of the family (not me or my Wife) and gave them Danny and Aaron. She then went and confided with Lana and Karl about how abusive BIL had been and how life was just miserable right now. A lot of us, especially Karl and my in-laws, were telling her that she needs to leave BIL and file for emergency custody of her children. She seemed to be listening to us and turning a corner, but inexplicably the psychiatric ward allowed BIL to have a phone call with Sarah and they had a long conversation. Suddenly, Sarah shut us all out and completely changed her story. She started defending BIL again. BIL was then let out of the psychiatric ward a day early. Since Karl was working at the time, Lana came to stay with us and then over at her in-laws. We are especially concerned about her safety around BIL due to her being pregnant. They have since cut nearly all contact with us for 4 days now. They have only told Karl that they were getting a new TV because the old one mysteriously broke somehow. They have continued to post on social media like nothing has happened. They have spent 2 days with BIL's family so we aren't sure what their opinion of this is, though we do know a sibling of his has also told Sarah to leave him prior to this latest situation. We don't know what their plans for childcare is because they are wholly reliant upon us. Lana is very reluctant to ever be home alone. Ruth is as well. There are so many other details I haven't mentioned. There have been holes in walls they've had to fix. There is some evidence that BIL is cheating on Sarah, but that evidence is somewhat inconclusive. The bigoted comments for a while now have gotten increasingly misogynistic. It's a lot of 'we need to respect proper gender roles' kind of stuff. There's just too much and I've already written a book on here. I don't really know what to do at this point. Because a lot of this stuff has been swept under the rug it's hard to tell how seriously CPS or police would take our claims. FIL has threatened to kick them out of their very cheap rental they're in now. Who knows what they would do in that scenario. I know this post is detailed and because of that BIL or Sarah might see it, but at this point I wonder if I even give a shit. They've already eluded to keeping their sons from us in the past and the vibes we are getting now is that they are already doing it. And from the bottom of my heart, fuck BIL. 

So a little back story about my exs lil sister, we’ll call her Anna, Anna is a year younger than her older brother less than a year younger than me. I met her from my ex I’ll call him Chad. We met when I was 13 and he was 14. I met Anna the following year when I was 14 and she was 13. Drama didn’t start right away, but she didn’t take school seriously her freshman year she ended the year with about 4 credits and next year her sophomore year only got 2 and after her sophomore year she dropped out saying for “mental health” even tho she was doing online school, no job, and was just trying to act like a bad ass. Anna was living with her father and step mom with her brother and half sister, she started getting rebellious smoking weed, smoking nic, having sex with a lot of guys and also going partying. She would run out of her house to go do whatever she wanted, one time I was even was on FaceTime with my ex as she was throwing a tantrum she locked herself in the bathroom screaming that she doesn’t care about her step mom or half sister because their not blood and she doesn’t care if they die, because they tried to take her phone away. She then ended up calling one of her boyfriends to pick her up and she ran out of the house and into his truck, her parents ended up calling the police and she texted her parents off a different phone and when her parents asked where she was her response was “it’s none of your business” she returned the next morning. It turned into a normal thing of her skipping school, sneaking off, breaking things in the house and going into her parent room to steal her phone. She then told her school she was being abused, which got debunked almost instantly since her brother testified and video recording from the neighbors driveway, because she claimed her dad staged her by her head and slammed her head into his truck door, her step mom had a video of her on the porch yanking out her own hair, no damage to the car and video shows her screaming at her house. Her mom locked her out because she didn’t feel safe with her being aggressive with a 2 year old in the house. Her father then put up cameras around the inside and outside of the house just to always have evidence of her lies. One time of her taking the bus to school she got in a fight with someone age 11 when she was 14 then posted on instagram bragging about getting charged with assault. She then made a claim that she wanted to kxxl herself so her family took her to a mental hospital the doctor told her parents she had no mental issues she’s just spoiled and will act out for people attention. Anna would constantly go to social media to complain about getting mistreated by her family. It got to the point her family knew there was not much they could do to help her, and they felt worried for their baby growing up around that. They ended up moving her into a family friends house where her parents stayed in contact with the parents of the other house and they gave money. There was parents and a daughter two years younger she became best friends with it was going well for the first few months but then Anna started to steal from the daughter I’ll call her Nat, they started to not get along and the friends Nat introduced her too she started talking shit about Nat to them. Anna was now 15 attempting to get jobs but couldn’t hold a job because of her bad attitude, well after 9 months Anna slept with Nats boyfriend, Nats boyfriend told Nat about what happened, the mom made Anna call her boyfriend and tell him how she cheated. The tension was too high and the parents told Anna parents they couldn’t take care of Anna anymore, Annas parents then talk to family, and Anna Uncle agreed to let her move in, she was 16 at this point and she moved in with her uncle and his girlfriend. She got a job at a sub place, but she kept smoking and having sex with random people. Well, she started getting into a lot of vocal arguments with his girlfriend and her uncle ended up texted my boyfriend asking if she can live with him. Her uncle said she was just selfish, and doesn’t like being told no. At this time her brother was living in a house with 3 guys with no extra room. I had my own two bedroom apartment, so I talked to her parents and they felt like I was a good choice and I asked Anna because even tho I wasn’t a fan of her I still felt like she needs her own room and she agreed. So her uncle drove her and her stuff to my place. Her family gave me some money to get her some furniture and they gave me a run down, also told me they’re are going to call to check up on her. I asked if she had any allergies or mental issues, she told me no but that she’s likely going to tell me a huge list of what’s wrong with her. So first day she moved in I took her to get fast food and asked some questions. She said she was abused by her parents Nats boyfriend pressured her to sleep with him and that her uncle was manipulative. Every story she told me she made herself a victim. She then asked me if I had any mental issues which I said I have PTSD and MDD and she asked me what MDD was, I explained it to her. I then asked her if she had any issues and she gave me a LIST she said anxiety, depression, borderline personality disorder , bi polar disorder, OCD, MDD, and PTSD. Even tho she had to ask me what MDD meant, but I didn’t confront her because her parents warned me that if I doubt her she will act out. So the first week, I got her a job where I work, started to teach her to drive and helped her set up a bank account went to the Apple Store so she could buy herself a new phone. Instantly I could tell why she kept getting fired, she was on her the entire time and everytime I looked over she was taking photos or videos of herself. She did not want to work so I did a lot of her work just so I didn’t get a bad rep. About day 4 she asked if she can invited a guy over that she knew on Snapchat. I said sure MY MISTAKE. This guy was a wanna be gangster, and he brought his friend, in front of him she acted awful, swore she was a fighter and badass, they ended up fucking and next day he was still there he did some Molly and drank a lot. My friend came over and Anna started to threaten her and say she could beat her ass in front of the guys. I took her into a room alone and told her to knock it off. We’ll later that night the guys wanted to bring over some girls, I was trying to sleep and my friend told me how, she told they guys she can drive them with my car. IVE ONLY TAKEN HER DRIVING TWICE. So I agreed to pick the girls up but told them I would be driving them back that night. It’s going good for a while until Anna starts talking shit about one of the girls and called her ghetto, this girl was 13 and Anna was 17. That girl confronted Anna, Anna swore up and down she didn’t say anything, then after 10 mins of pressing her Anna admitted she called her ghetto. This girl beat her ass. Anna started crying and this girl came up to her and said that wasn’t a fair fight, that she can get 5 mins to put her hair up and get some water but they were gonna run it again. Everyone is in my living room talking then they go outside and she gets her ass beat again, Anna then goes into my bathroom in my bedroom, anytime I went in she told me to kick them out. I told her she wanted them here she has to tell them to get out but I’ll have her back. It got to the point I tried to sleep on my couch, so the guys tried getting Anna to go to her room so I could sleep but she screamed at them. So the two girls went in and told her she needs to go to her room. Anna picked up a bunch of my stuff on the counter and threw it at the sink. The 16 year old girl got pissed and wanted to fight her, but I said she had enough and if she needed to get it off her chest we can fight, we ended up scrapping. It got late so I went to drive them home… pt 2?

I bought my first mini bike about a week ago, I planned on doing a predator 224 build, I have all the parts for it except the actual 224 (my store didn't have any in stock for a few weeks and was waiting for them to come back in stock) I kept checking the website and boom Friday they are gone from the website, can't find them anywhere, that coupled with the fact when I checked on Thursday the closest store that had one was 4 hours away, leads me to believe they don't have them anymore, I tried asking in the harbor freight subreddit but got no response so I figured id drop the question here and see if anyone had any info / idea as to what's going on before I buy a 212 and put all my parts in that.

So, basically, some kid told me that he would give me 5 euros if I did a Russian dance (Prisiadki). I did it, when when I asked him to pay, he said that he didn't have the money on him and that he would pay me the day after. The day after, I asked him, and he tried blaming somebody else.
Fast-forward to present day, He is constantly making fun of me that he isn't going to pay me, I asked school to do literally ANYTHING that could help, school does nothing, his "friends" are making fun of me as well and he owes me 57.5 euros.
What can I do to make him pay, or at least stop making fun of me?
EDIT: I see a lot of people saying that he won't pay me back. Is there a way I could get revenge, instead of him paying?

I thought I’d make character alignment charts for some of the characters. Eve, Adam, Lily, Raven and Mother Sphere. :)
I’d do more, but these were really the key players of the story.
Eve - Neutral Good (examples: Wonder Woman, Batman)
Neutral Good is one of the best character alignments because these characters do what is good without any bias for or against order. Eve doesn’t start out this way, but after spending time on Earth, she slowly opens up her mind to new perspectives and she values them all in her search for the truth.
In the end of the True Ending, she spends all night long fighting the Army, and she slips into Chaotic Good, which a willingness to “challenge authority” and break rules in order to achieve a positive change. So Eve sort of goes through all the stages of Good - Lawful, Neutral real and Chaotic. A character like Batman does the same thing.
She does what is necessary given the scenario.
Adam - Chaotic Neutral (examples: Catwoman, Jack Sparrow, Deadpool)
Chaotic Neutral characters don’t intentionally go out to create problems, but they often mistakenly cause them as they pursue their goals and interests. They’re also not super respectful of laws or rules. They basically just follow their own rules.
But they’re not intentionally malicious, either.
And when they do screw up, they usually regret it and try to make it right. They’re usually on the good side, but they’re also sort of unpredictable ‘wildcards’ and their errors make the story move forward. There’s normally at least one Chaotic Neutral per story, but not more. Since it’s too much mayhem.
Lily - Lawful Good (ex: Hermione Granger, Tails from Sonic lol)
Characters like this promote the greater good while strictly following rules and procedures.
They believe the best way to accomplish their work is to remain on the strict grounds of the orders they were given and not leaving those grounds. Not even questioning authority.
This can backfire on them, of course.
Raven - Neutral Evil (Gollum, Lord of the Rings)
While Chaotic Neutrals (like Adam) are good but selfish, Neutral Evils (like Raven) are cruel and selfish. Raven probably fell into the same moral category as Adam, at first, but then she lost her mind.
In her case, her “personal agenda” is Adam himself. Her obsession with him. She doesn’t think of the chaos she causes in order to eliminate Eve, because she’s jealous that he has chosen Eve over her. She sees Mother Sphere for who she is, but doesn’t particularly care for people who aren’t named Adam.
She falls into Neutral Evil since she turns Tachy into an Alpha Naytiba maliciously. The key word here is “maliciously.” As in she planned it out in advance and did it to torture Eve.
Raven is also being intentional when she attacks Xion. She’s doing it to “mock” Adam and Eve, according to her character files. So that is the kind of intent that lands her in this category.
Mother Sphere - Lawful Evil (example: Darth Vader.)
These types of characters are often tyrannical.
They follow a strict hierarchy, where they hold more power than anyone else in society. They are calculating and organized.
Unlike Chaotic Evil characters, Lawful Evil characters will tell you the truth when asked. Even if it’s something like “humans aren’t evolved enough, therefore I must wipe them out and replace them.”
This is evil, but it’s also truthful. Mother Sphere falls into this category.

M21 I'm doubting if it was strict parenting or if it was the drink but I want opinions. She has done a lot but I don't feel entirely satisfied either. But in the days I have drafted this, my doubts only grow.
As a kid my mom hawked over me and now things I wish I could have experienced did not exist, like going to a park or playground with a friend without supervision, whereas she did. Going to the gas station for snack I couldn't, when she asked her parents and was given a quarter when everything was a cent. Riding a bike was limited to the street we live on, and when I was able to leave, I couldn't leave the neighborhood when she walked for a while to make sure her friend got home. Once sitting on my bike at the edge of the sidewalk and she walked over, cursed me out for going on a different street and wouldn't believe me. I couldn't go to a friends house because I was going to do my homework how my teacher taught me instead of hers, which I didnt know and was not taught. At a friends house, she berated me for making her wait in the car for a few minutes longer than the arranged pickup time. By comparison to what it would have been like, it is a magical opportunity lost.
For most of my school years, all I did was go to school, do homework and play games. Despite catching on to lessons quickly, classes were something to pass, nothing more, not even for life skills. Have a B? Make it an A. I did. Is the project due? Make it better. Alright. Taking orchestra and painting was fleeting then and while I enjoyed it, it was only done for practice or assignment. Now I am upset that it was all I did instead of going out and experiencing life: going out with friends, finding a club or sport to do, or just big activity sessions. Never had a curfew because I never left home to start. I may have had fun gaming then, but I lament heavy over that now to where I will not touch one. A future education and the future as a whole I should have taken a lot more seriously than I could possibly have imagined. School did push for it, but I was a fool and did not care.
Other than the occasional family visit, I did nothing and learned nothing. Never taught to cook much, properly clean, shop for necessities, make right finances, etc. Future prospects was left to whatever I would choose, which I would put it later down the road. Never got any real world experience and just been sheltered for so long, both by my doing and my moms. No drive to do anything, nothing of a hopeful future, no being pulled out of whatever I was doing to learn anything or having skills necessary in the world today be incentivized. Aside from making sure I did well in school, I was left to myself.
She always has something to complain about. Streaks of mean and grumpy. Remembered somethings of what we were interested in but other times just an empty face. Who my mom is today is doom and gloom, speaking two different points that are showing the worst of her and nitpicking over every possible detail. Most of who she enjoys in media has an underlying toxic presence to them with name calling. Polarize, prejudice, politicize, judge and bias everything. Norway and Iceland? Too cold and mountainous, how could anyone have settled there? Germany? They all speak the same language and cannot understand anyone in a city that is 30 minutes away. That guy's accent she can't stand and defaulted to being generated, even though he sounds the same speaking Finnish. All for a better planet yet everything is wasted, trashed, or sent to China. Treat others how you want to be and from where I stand, seem like a backtalking coward. Couldn't have a water pitcher because "no one refilled it" to keep the filter going when I made sure to keep it plentiful. If she has a problem she will bring up the one exact same example related to the topic that I have heard plenty before. And most of the negative aspects of society happen more likely than they should. All while bring home a 24, 30 or however many count of budweiser a week at least. I imagine we only got along because I wasn't a brat anymore and did not try to upset her. Falling in line if you will.
Emotions bottled or maybe emotionally dead. The masculinity trap of what is the general expectation of "men". To express myself, to show emotion, to even cry is something I don't want to do out of fear of being seen, which is ironic given the code of the samurai. 6th grade she didn't remember to pick me up even though I said and called and a friend and his friend caught me being emotional and stayed around a bit to comfort me.
The fear that was put into everything. An actual quote went something as "If you get hurt, I'm not going to drive you to the hospital". Another "All girls are evil". And "that sounds too confrontational" when I asked neighbors to clean after their dog. Even questioning if my eyes doing something required a doctor for her to say that my eyes will fail naturally and something about her relative who had an eye problem and didn't see a doctor. Things that made me not do the kinds of things I want to do now. I have been so sheltered then and now that I want to go out but there is the ever scared part of me towards the unknown world. I feel I have been prejudiced into thinking such ways but there's no personal experience to back or challenge said thoughts.
Admittably, parts of me are glad I know what I have and want for morals and mindset, but its also a matter of temptation and theres still so much that I wish to explore. At times I feel I matured too quickly at the cost of a kids stupidity or innocence and now am too serious and heavyhearted for my own good. To be told how I've matured when there wasn't much to mature from. A part of me feels that I have taken after her cold, judgemental, selfish attitude and that makes me fearful to screw up any kind of friendship or relationship, and dreading that I could reflect that onto any child I may have no matter how far away into the future I do have one. I kind of want to hate her but I am so emotionally gone or warped that I can't. If I "rebel" now, or begin to, I feel that might get the fire started.
She would argue with my dad from time to time but then that continued on for days and it was a cold environment lasting days to weeks after a fight. Even prior to their fights, they rarely slept together in the same bed, let alone the same room. She would critique his employer and even his choice of friends. Once he woke up late, thus having us late to get ready for school and she began one for that. I don't remember the exact details but she once criticized him over a coat he got me. All while listening from the top of the stairs to even the bottom where I was covered by a wall. A few times we listened and we made noise that I think made them aware of us but that didn't stop them. Even starting in our presence where we would leave the room. It got to the point where he actually packed lightly to leave for the night or days and my brother and I stopped him just so he could be home. I wish I did let him go then.
I really do believe I could have had it differently if my dad was alive. He made such an effort. When I was in hospital at 4, he made the efforts to get me out and moving around. When I didn't know a swim style, he literally chucked me towards the deeper waters (I was scared, but he was right in the end, one of the fondest memories). He taught me how to use the mower and had a mini shop set up in the garage. I played with him so much and he got me into the complex games he enjoyed as I got older. For as rough we were, he was so gentle. I looked up to him then and even more than ever now. He made the effort to be one worthy of "Dad" and he was damn well worthy of that and no one could be more better for me.
"Faded gray are all the days of yesteryears So much time has turned to memories and to tears" -Valkyrja
I did graduate HS 3 years ago, did a summer program and since nothing. No job, education chances, or life plans. Even though I felt smarter, I was turned off of college simply for cost reasons and "feeding the rich" mindset. Last summer I began to look at my past and future with a whole new look with no physical change taking effect. First week into March this year I realized what I have been doing compared to how others are living through good and bad and I fell into depression hard. Now it persists with great off and on. Where I have been up at 9 in the morning to suddenly be up at 5 or 6 in the afternoon. Throughout the past 3 years, there was no making sure I was ok, no seeing how I felt, no finding out what I wanted to do. And I am still frightened of what may be out there, even when that is the key to the living that I want. I want to go, I need to go. But where? I leave for the good and better of myself, but I also leave behind this place I've called home, yet it's now so far from the one I want to remember with a fond memory. So much happens that seems to have been "normal" when it doesn't seem like it should. The same place with the same inhabitants in the same motions. No going out, no difference, no change, and VERY artificial. Nothing means anything anymore. To let how I feel about the previous years subside in me or blow over...
Always have been insecure, hesitant, second guessing. While others had spent their 18s, 19s and 20s going into the world doing many things, I've had the summer program at 18, nothing at 19, and two days in the big city to attend a concert at 20. Little noteworthy moments under my belt. It seems like love in the immediate family was not two ways or had to be earned. I have not grown. Who I am is not who I want to be at heart.
For 21, I know I should have more skills and be in better places, but theres nothing from anyone. No check-in, no advice, no motivation. Like "the birdling will leave the nest" instead of anyone preparing a boy to what is before him. Its not a snap of fingers or blink of an eye do I learn what is expected. On the grown up part, I feel heavily underprepared for the world and life. Far too long have I stayed and lived in my head. I cannot understand why I am still at home, a part of myself thinks to keep the peace but what peace needs to be kept? Nothing and no one is stopping me from leaving except myself and the thought that they will most definitely want to know where I am if I go, which I do not want to tell anyone. Or that I've been sheltered and not have realised the gates have been unlocked long ago. Things are not ok and I want to stop pretending when I leave. Even with Spring's green grass under a blue sky that ends the day with the orange sunset piercing the clouds to make them blue and pink do I feel grey.
"Watching to the night with tired eyes Waiting for nothing all my life" -Battle Against Time
I feel the kid within me, wanting to do those exciting things, yearning for any kind of companion or fellowship. What daylight reveries I can conjure to make him feel hopeful enough so he can shine soon. The things I want to do to feel happy. I want to water that little guy.
A lot of this I have remembered recently and still am connecting the dots. I already am upset at myself for not doing anything in life, but I want to be angry and I honestly hate myself for not seeing this sooner and listening to her for so long. Despite feeling broken and defunct, I still feel young enough but there's been so little done that it feels many chances are long gone. There is more freedoms I have that I do not know about and ones that I have had before that gathered dust. And now I am in a toss up between beginning college preparation now, leaving states or the country to act on these now childhood regrets. I don't want to be who I am now any longer. I just want to do something. And in between it all, confusion of what to do, how to feel and saddened that I am not who I once was or could have been.

I had a crush on this guy, he was my family friend. I only saw him when I visited my cousins in virginia. We live in the same state but we only meet in Virginia for some reason like mutual ppl parties. Last summer I had an intense crush on him. He was a whole new person who wasn’t just my type but elevated it too. Like if I wanna date someone I’d look for him or his qualities in him. Qualities like : respects elders, my entire family loves/adores him, he’s very very smart, very very funny, and cute and handsome. Just a typical crush. But he’s very confusing, I haven’t made any moves but I do clearly remember asking him the classic “do u like olives” question in the car one time, I was kinda drunk so I don’t rmbr what he said. I think he said maybe or something like that. My cousin sister said he likes me ( he didn’t actually tell her that, she does thinks that by the way he acts with me) but my other cousin said maybe because he’s like that with everyone. sometimes I feel like he likes me but is too shy to say it. I rmbr me and a bunch of ppl and him went to the Barbie movie, he hugged and greeted everyone except me, he only shook my hands and smiled but after the movie he asked if I liked it like separately just me. After a while those feelings for him just died? Bc I hadn’t seen him for a very long time. Now summers back and idk what to do. Do u guys think there’s something here? ( and I think he maybe actually does like me but again I’m not sure)

I might have to transport a friend's pellet rifle from Washington State to Oregon in my car. It will be well stored in the trunk. My question is, if I get stopped by an officer do I need to tell him about the pellet rifle? Will he ask for any documentation? What issues might arise from this?
Thank you!

I’m the oldest, so i feel inclined as an adult now to step in. But my brother asked my father a simple question, to which he didn’t answer just shook his head. My brother had taken it has my father being cheeky and that’s all it had taken.
My mother turned around and commented and then my father went of on a tangent, got up slammed every door he could, wrecked the kitchen, then proceed to stomp up the stairs like a child, and then wreck the bedroom to.
My mother then turned around to my brother and said “aw thanks brothers name”. And i was like “he literally just asked a question, like what”.
And then she pounced on that opportunity to turn it around on her own children, saying we do fuck all in the house and that illicits my fathers anger? Some parenting that is to blame your children for your own problems you project on them and then get angry at them for it.
Like why bring children into this world if you can’t take the shaded glasses of for just a minute. It is exhausting being in a house with parents who are close minded, and then say they aren’t 😂 Like have you heard yourselves speak to your children and wonder why we all need therapy.
They knew the consequences of having children and now they’re having to deal with it so they don’t take the blame, but of course the children do.

I’m 17f, I went on bumble for fun with a friend, we swiped for each other both our profiles showed 18yo. (I’m turning 18 this year)
I swiped a guy of 29yo for fun as I was bored, we became a match and talked, we switched numbers, however I told him I was 17yo and he was ok with that.
We met each other irl and it felt normal and calm, I felt at ease like nothing was wrong.
We met a second time, so did my mum meet him and she thought he was a nice guy nothing wrong with him. However, on that day we tried to kiss me, I went in for the awkward hug (that day we talked about a lot of things and we aligned very much together, we also talked about partners (I was the person who started that conversation)) he said sorry multiple times and he never said “let’s keep this a secret” or smth weird like that. I told him it is ok but that he should think about the next time as it am still underage.
We met for a third time, this time we discussed our mutual feeling together. We both know there is some tension flowting around between us. We talked about this and I said “it’s the age for me, let’s wait until I’m 18/19” he respects that and understands. He did say “it’s also weird for me as you are actually 17 you know?” (I picked this up as reversed psychology)
His exes are older than he is and he had a relationship of 8 years a couple of years ago etc etc. I’m the first very young person he feels aligned with (due to past experiences I am more mature than a 17 yo however that doesn’t take away that I’m still legally a minor)
I feel comfortable around him, he’s nice etc etc. I just don’t know if he’s grooming me now as he first thought I was 18, I don’t feel Uncomfortable around him and he repeats my boundaries.
What do you think? My question is would he still swipe me if my real age was displayed on bumble… As I’m turning 18 this year would it still be considered grooming?
Please let me know.

Hi all, longtime listener, first-time caller. Please see my query and first 300 below.
My biggest question is this: 95% of the story takes place in 2014, but the book opens in 2020 when my main character receives a letter from the California Dept of Fair Housing & Employment informing her of an investigation into behavior at Chatpic. Receiving the letter spurs her to tell the story of what happened back then. The book checks back into 2020 in the middle as my MC tries to get more information about the investigation, and then it ends back in 2020 again when she decides what she wants to do about the letter.
The reason the story takes place in 2014 is because the time period--pre #MeToo/Donald Trump/the workplace reckoning of 2020--informs the decisions the MC makes back then, and she's looking back at it from a wiser perspective. If you've read The Rachel Incident, Caroline O'Donoghue does a similar thing as she retells a 2008 abortion story from the perspective of present day.
In the end, the investigation is not a driving force of the plot--so my question is how important is it that it's mentioned in the query? I ask because I've found that trying to add that piece to what I've already written starts to get convoluted, though obviously I can work at it. I think it's very clear once you read the first 300, but for agents who don't want a sample, is it clear in the blurb that this story is looking back to a time gone by?
Mostly looking for insight on this question specifically, but if you have further feedback about the letter for first 300, open to that as well. Thanks!
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Dear [Agent],
Thank you for the opportunity to submit my query for TERMS OF SERVICE, a true-ish fictional story about a young woman in a nearly impossible workplace a la UNCANNY VALLEY meets THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA (with shades of 9 TO 5). TERMS OF SERVICE is complete at 95,000 words.
It’s 2014 and down-and-out celebrity blogger Maggie Clarke is desperate for a fresh start. Not only is she broke in New York City, but at 31, she thought she’d be writing something a little less embarrassing than Justin Bieber listicles by now. When her longtime internet friend Aron York–recently named the world’s youngest billionaire–offers her a lucrative position at his massively popular social media app Chatpic that puts her at the center of his inner circle in Los Angeles, it’s exactly the step-up she’s been waiting for. As Maggie learns to manage the always-on hours, the slew of acronyms, and the unlimited access to free cold brew, she encounters another more complicated problem–the boys’ club. Except this isn’t the typical ham-fisted sexism she’s used to–this is the tech bro variety: insidious, inexorable, and infuriating. When she meets an ambitious young reporter who encourages her to speak out, Maggie has a shot at revenge. But in a world before mansplaining and microaggressions, is blowing the whistle worth the risk? And is anyone ready to hear it?
Like Maggie, I was also plucked from internet obscurity by the world’s (then) youngest billionaire, [redacted], to come work at his massively popular social media app, [redacted company]. I was a founding member of the company’s content team, and all I have to show for it is six footnotes in the [redacted company] biography [redacted title] and the brutal feminist awakening that inspired me to write this manuscript. Before that, I was a full-time writer in New York whose work has appeared on MTV, Rolling Stone and Elle. Currently I’m a content and editorial consultant in Chicago, and I’m also on TikTok where 21,000 people watch me rant about work and office culture. (It’s also where 2M people enjoyed my show-and-tell video about the “sentimental” stock certificates [redacted company previously mentioned] gave a few early employees–that were worth exactly $0.00.)
As the agent who represents [Author 1] and [Author 2], you have a strong list when it comes to complex female characters embroiled in complicated social dynamics. TERMS OF SERVICE would be a great addition to this track because, while similar themes of class and workplace are explored, my flavor of levity and sarcasm makes my work distinct from [Author 1] and [Author 2], bringing a new facet to your program.
If you are interested in reading TERMS OF SERVICE, I would be happy to forward a sample of any length you suggest. Thank you for your consideration!
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First 300:
Chapter 1
2020
A lot of people might revel in the idea of receiving a letter announcing an investigation into their ex-employer.
One might, for example, envision draping themselves in a mink stole, lighting the cigarette at the end of their old-timey cigarette holder, and dialing the investigator’s number from a rotary phone atop a solid wood desk under shadowy, film noir lights. One might then imagine whispering I knew this day would come into the receiver between bursts of psychotic, hysterical laughter as they rejoiced in the long overdue arrival of the long arm of the law.
But me, I wasn’t so sure. Maybe because I didn’t have a mink stole.
No, I was crouched on the ground of my parents’ musky basement in Des Plaines, Illinois, knee-deep in piles of old diaries and CDs when I received notice of one such letter. It was month four of COVID, and Dad and I were only halfway through his cleaning list. He was already a germaphobe so a global pandemic was all he needed to justify a top-to-bottom disinfection of the entire house. And since my routine trip home in the middle of March turned into a hapless extended stay when the world shut down, it was the perfect excuse to put me to work. Just like the good old days.
We wiped down every square inch of the place. We soaked the faucet heads in lemon juice, we scrubbed the coffee mugs with baking soda. We vacuumed the damn fridge.
Reorganizing the basement shelves was a beast. Every box was like a Russian nesting doll of useless crap: old TV Guides, corroded double-A batteries, dried-out cans of paint primer, an unsettling number of hand saws. I made decent headway through the “tools” and “electronics,” but I lost all steam when I got to my high school stuff—faded Polaroids and folded-up notes stopped me in my tracks.