So he doesn’t know the main reason for the excursion, I am with my family and will be for another week.
My parents and spouse have all gotten closer this year a lot due to us not being at odds and him treating me well. It’s hard for all of us to fathom why he’s relapsing in his behavior and we all wish he’d change.
But my parents are too optimistic and I get rose colored glasses about the situation when I’m around them. They think (one as a preacher) that going to church and counseling would make him change. Counseling did make him better for a couple of years but I don’t think it’s the grand fix, neither do I think Christianity is going to immediately fix things. Tbh I’m reading the Bible and feel less inclined towards Christianity from reading it, I thought I’d feel the opposite but a lot of that shi is wack to me thus far but who knows, might start vibing with it. Having to be around conersative family (no shade to diff beliefs just my personal issue) when we don’t agree on a lot of topics is hard, like I could. It believe my mom saying women shouldn’t preach and it should be really men only because dead stupid Paul from he Bible said women shouldn’t, even though she acknowledges it’s been deemed as a thing of the culture of that time not applicable to now??? I used to want to preach and follow footsteps but apparently if I did it wouldn’t be the right thing cos I’m a woman. fuck that shit, stupid ass Paul (I have a large amount of beef with a number of people in the Bible people so far for reasons like this). Sorry being a little silly but.
Is there any online services or in person type programs in the US to help kInda guide through a process of disentanglememt and divorce in abusive relationships? I can’t even mention it to people in my state because I’ve been recognized as disabled and any abuse against a disabled person if said in confidence still has to be reported. I shut down the OSI military investigation that started whenever someone reporting against my wishes and I turned away DV who came to the door like who tf thinks that’s a good idea tbh??? He was in the living room playing video games right where the front door is and I had to shoo them away quietly and pretend it was nothing. That was mortifying and nerve wracking. I don’t want any of that but I’m struggling to make the right decision and getting away permanently. I don’t want to hurt his career and I don’t even want to divorce him but I know I need to leave.
Ig im saying, i already dont feel strong enough to let go and start over and lose everything. It doesn’t help that my support system reinforces that, it makes it so confusing. I lose my job, my scholarship, my insurance (HUGE issue, my med for my disorder is $1,500 without insurance, I’m lucky I’m on Tricare for now), my dog, my home, the beaches, and someone I’ve been with for 7 years. I don’t feel strong enough to start over. Makes me feel hopeless and like I want to give up completely wish I was just dead instead kinda. But if that’s the third option then I really have nothing to lose if I left other than being obliterated with grief over the breakup for a long while.

I’m currently 25M about to be 26 and I’ve been dealing with sciatic nerve pain along with other back problems since I was about 14/15… both mom and dad have bad backs/sciatica flare ups as well as myself being a bit overweight my entire life, gaining and losing the same 50 pounds for the last decade lol… I know I’m only just scratching the surface as far as back pain. I’ve tried tramadol before and it works wonders, especially getting me to fall asleep and comfortably at that, although I have to take 2 50mg tablets as soon as I wake up as well as some Tylenol but then I’m good to go for the next several hours. It comes and goes, the pain that is. I’ve noticed the sciatica flares up with the change of seasons and if I don’t take care of myself it’ll last a month or more, getting worse and worse; shooting down my leg and up to my shoulder and neck. Walking becomes legitimately impossible and laying down & sleeping become the bane of my existence. Again, it doesn’t last too long especially if I take care of myself. But I have dealt with it for 2/3 months at a time before in some cases. I’m only ~26 and I fear it’s going to increasingly get worse, even though I’m at a lighter weight than I was when I was 15! Luckily I haven’t had a severe flare up this year (yet) but I would love to get some thoughts on my situation before I do.
Should I attempt to find a doctor that will prescribe me tramadol as that’s the only medication I’ve found that works most efficiently? What should I expect by going to a doctor with this type of pain? And what in the world does the change of seasons and the flare ups have to do with each other?! lol. Thanks for any and all the help!
TLDR; Male 26, Sciatica pain has come and gone consistently for a decade and I’m desperate…would greatly appreciate tips & tricks, and thoughts on tramadol experiences if any as well as asking doctor for this medication? Thank you!

Implementing VLSI circuits on FPGAs involves a series of structured steps. This guide provides a detailed overview of the entire process, from initial design specification to final hardware testing and optimization.

Step 1: Design Specification

Objective: Define the functional and performance requirements of the VLSI circuit.

• Functional Specification: Clearly outline the intended functionality, including input-output behavior, performance metrics, and power consumption targets.
• Block Diagram: Develop a high-level block diagram to visualize the main components and their interactions.

Step 2: Hardware Description Language (HDL) Coding

Objective: Develop the circuit design using a Hardware Description Language (HDL), such as Verilog or VHDL.

• Writing Code: Write HDL code for each component of the design, including logic gates, data paths, control units, and interconnections.
• Module Definition: Break down the design into smaller, manageable modules, each with its own HDL description.

Step 3: Simulation and Verification

Objective: Ensure the design works as intended before implementation.

• Testbenches: Create testbenches to simulate the HDL code, providing stimulus to the design and checking outputs against expected results.
• Functional Simulation: Use simulation tools like ModelSim or Vivado Simulator to verify the logical correctness of the design.
• Debugging: Identify and resolve bugs in the HDL code based on simulation results.

Step 4: Synthesis

Objective: Convert the HDL code into a gate-level netlist compatible with the FPGA.

• Synthesis Tools: Use synthesis tools such as Xilinx Vivado or Intel Quartus to translate HDL into a netlist, which represents the design using logic gates and flip-flops.
• Optimization: Optimize the netlist for performance, area, and power consumption.

Step 5: Implementation

Objective: Map the netlist onto the FPGA's resources.

• Place and Route: Place the synthesized design onto the FPGA's logic blocks and route the interconnections. This step is managed by implementation tools within the FPGA software suite.
• Constraints: Apply timing and placement constraints to guide the place-and-route process, ensuring that the design meets performance requirements.

Step 6: Bitstream Generation

Objective: Generate the configuration file that programs the FPGA.

• Bitstream File: Create a bitstream file, which contains the binary data needed to configure the FPGA’s logic blocks and interconnects.
• Programming File: Use the bitstream file to program the FPGA hardware.

Step 7: FPGA Programming and Testing

Objective: Load the design onto the FPGA and verify its operation.

• Programming the FPGA: Use an FPGA programmer or JTAG interface to upload the bitstream file to the FPGA.
• Hardware Verification: Connect the FPGA to a test setup and verify its operation against the design specifications. Perform functional tests, timing analysis, and performance measurements.
• Iterative Debugging: If issues are identified, iterate through the simulation, synthesis, and implementation steps to resolve them.

Step 8: Optimization and Refinement

Objective: Enhance the design for better performance, lower power consumption, or other improvements.

• Performance Tuning: Modify the design or constraints to achieve the desired performance metrics.
• Power Optimization: Adjust the design to minimize power usage, potentially involving redesigning parts of the circuit or tweaking synthesis settings.
• Resource Utilization: Ensure efficient use of the FPGA’s resources to fit within the available logic blocks and other components.

Tools and Software

• HDL Editors: Integrated Development Environments (IDEs) like Xilinx Vivado, Intel Quartus, or others that support HDL coding.
• Simulation Tools: ModelSim, Vivado Simulator, or similar tools for functional verification.
• Synthesis Tools: Included in Vivado, Quartus, or other FPGA toolchains.
• Place and Route Tools: Part of the FPGA design suite, handling placement and routing.
• FPGA Programmer: Hardware tools such as USB blasters or JTAG interfaces for programming the FPGA.

Conclusion

Implementing a VLSI circuit on an FPGA involves translating high-level design specifications into hardware using HDL, verifying functionality through simulation, synthesizing the design into a gate-level netlist, mapping the design onto the FPGA's architecture, generating the bitstream, and finally programming and testing the FPGA. This structured process leverages various software tools to ensure the design meets performance, power, and area constraints.

First, a little about me. I'm 5'5ish, 135ish depending on the day, and have dark brown hair that falls part way down my back with brown eyes. My mom is a Crow (Native American) and my dad is Italian so the olive complexion genes are active in my family. I've got a fairly petite/athletic build with a 32B chest and a toned butt. My nipples are dark brown, on the smaller side, and I shave everywhere. I'm a fan of tattoos and have a feather on my foot, flower pieces on my right hip into my lower ribs, left shoulder, and lower back, a small script piece in my left side bra line, a green carebear in my left bikini line and a large dream catcher down my left ribs. If there's a detail I've left out, feel free to ask ;)
What a week. 18 year old me had gone from a dry spell since AIT and graduation to a blow job, facial, and quick hard sex with a married captain at my first duty station. I was falling fast and hard for him. I wanted him to want me. I wanted him to think of me when he thought of being intimate. I wanted to be his release to do everything she wouldn't.
Dustin snapped me this morning, a pic of his obvious buldge greeting my day. "How's my little Private this morning? I wish you were here to help with this"....You have no idea Dustin. Now that the bandaid has been ripped off, I want nothing more than to keep going. I send him a snap back of my semi sheer, black athletic thong, holding it open in the front with the caption "you could drop your load right in here sir". Naughty I know. For some reason, the thought of him filling my underwear with cum is erotic and in the moment, I crave the feel of his warmth between my legs.
"Come by the house on your lunch break and you can have it" I get in reply. Fuck.
I get dressed in my camo uniform with a generic sports bra and the same black athletic thong underneath and try make it through the morning as routinely as possible. Not possible. All I can think of is what I'm willing to do for the married man I'm lusting for and it's got my mind anywhere but at work.
Dustin let's me know he left early for lunch so he's ready whenever I am. The whole drive over, my mind is racing at the prospect of what's about to happen. I knock and find the door open, with Dustin on the couch, laptop open to some semi sexy photos I'd sent to tease him over the last week while he strokes his firm shaft. "Private Hannah reporting as ordered sir" I say as sexily as I can muster in the spur of the moment.
"Private Hannah, you said you'd found a place to hold my cum" completely keeping character.
"Yes sir" I say, stepping around to stand in front of him, undoing my belt and the buttons on my pants, letting them drop to the floor around my ankles.
"Open up then, I'm already close since you decided to be late"
I hold open the front of my black athletic thong, exposing my shaved pubic area for his inspection.
"At least you remembered to shave to start the week" he says and he builds the pace of his stroking and touches the tip of his penis against my smooth skin. In moments I see him start to swell as he nears his release. A thick rope of white cum erupts from his tip and is followed by a second, third, and fourth. My underwear is filled with his thick, warm release and soon its soaked, mixing with my own minor arousal that has built at the situation. As he finishes, I let go of my waistband and allow my cum soaked thong to cling to my lower lips, teasing me with what could have been.
I pull my pants back up and stand breathless in front of eachother. It's been less than 10 minutes since I walked through the door, we've barely spoken and now his cum is dripping down my inner thigh. What has happened? I feel like an incredibly erotic play thing that's been used for a passing moment of pleasure and right then, I know I'm hooked.
"Hannah, I'm sorry if that was too much" Dustin says, coming to the realization that I'm now back in uniform with his cum filling my panties.
I kiss him square on the lips. "Shhhh babe. I wanted this. I want all of you"
"So you really liked that?"
"Dustin that has got to be one of the hottest things I've ever tried. I'm not changing for work"
I sit on his couch in a pool of his release while we chat for the remainder of our lunch hour. When it's time to go, I feel a glob of him drip down my leg. "Can I come spend the night tonight?" I ask, hoping to get my own release after work.
"Sure hun, I just have a few calls to make but it's okay"
I head back to work with a kiss goodbye and the rest of the day I can feel the stickiness between my legs and it keeps me on edge. I run back to my barracks room, take a fast shower, grab a change of clothes for tomorrow, and something special for tonight. I throw on some gym shorts and a hoodie over my sports bra. Coupled with my slides and I'm back across post and find a note on the door "on a call, be quite when you come in"
I come in and quietly shut the door and make my way past Dustin in the livingroom, obviously on a video chat with someone with the screen facing the wall to the garage. I hear a woman's voice say "oh man those walls are paper thin, I think I just heard the neighbors kids come home from school"
Oh shit, he's on with his wife I realize as I tiptoe my way to the master bedroom where I change into my suprise. Naked in his bedroom, I slip into a teal, sheer lace bra with enough underwire support to give me a little cleavage. I pull on a matching set of panties with an intricate sheer lace front and a single thin string between my cheeks in the back. I fold up my sticky cum soaked thong from earlier and walk back into the livingroom.
Dustin does a double take as I come around the corner. He covers this with a coughing fit as his wife asks if he's okay. "Yeah hun just had an itch in my throat" and they continue chatting, her oblivious to the fact that I've just sat down across from him.
I look him square in the eyes as I begin to tease my dark brown nipples through my sheer lace bra. As he tries to hold a conversation, I do everything I can to lightly tease him. I pinch and massage my breasts, softly run a finger between my legs on top of my lacy bottoms. I stand up and start to stretch, bending forward to let my small breasts hang just out of sight of his camera before turning around and bending forward, reaching back to spread my bum and letting the g-string bury itself between my cheeks, barely keeping my other tight hole from view.
I turn back around and unfold the sticky thong he came in earlier and hold it up for him to see the stain his release left on them, right between the legs. I pull my teal lace thong down in the front, and standing right behind his computer, I begin to lightly tease myself with the soft fabric of the back athletic thong, gently massaging my clit, resoaking the nearly dry panties with another round of sexual arousal.
As my arousal grows, I gradually push into my slick entrance and with one finger and then another, the soft athletic fabric of my underwear once again getting soaked as I rub my clit with them, teasing myself with the over stimulating feel against my raw bundle of nerves. I squat down, my face now right behind the computer screen as I squeeze my breast and open my mouth in a silent moan, performing for the man who can't respond.
All of a sudden I stop, ending my tease at the edge of release, not wanting to slip and give away what's going on...and to tease Dustin further. I stand up, place the arousal and cum soaked black thong on the table right behind his laptop and I walk to the kitchen and begin working on dinner with whatever ingredients I can scrounge up in the kitchen. It's such a turn on to do such a normal task in such a small set of lingerie and I secretly hope that Dustin is sneaking peeks at me from across the house.
At long last I feel warm, strong hands wrap around my waist and a kiss finds my cheek. "How's my baby girl, you little tease?"
I blush at the pet name the gentle touch. "I'm almost done, go sit down you silly boy" I say as I start to plate our dinner of chicken and grilled veggies, sauntering into the dining room like a server at one of those lingerie sports bars.
"So you sure know how to put on a show, Hannah" Dustin says as we begin to eat
"I can be anything you want me to be" I say as I begin a speech I'd thought through in my head, telling Dustin that I don't want casual, I want to be the girl he craves, the one who does the things that no one else does, who let's him try the things he's only imagined I'm his wildest sessions alone with himself.
"What do you get out of all of this?" He asks, questioning this step towards commitment.
"I get to explore myself and act out my cravings without having to deal with all the rumors of barracks and searching for guys to feel safe with. I don't want to be your wife. I just want you to forget her when your with me, and I want you to think of me when you choose how to play"
"Well if you're going to explore, we're going to have to push you out of your comfort zone and actually find new places and things to try"
My heart is racing as fantasies flood through my mind. "What do you have in mind?"
"Just play along with different roles and we'll see what happens baby girl"
Baby girl....is this role number one? Does Dustin think that with our 8 year age gap and my petite frame that we could play out what I think he wants to play? I did just tell him that I want to be the one he thinks of.
"Yes daddy"
"Good Girl"
I. Am. Wet.
"So what did you have in mind for dessert baby girl?"
I stand up, clean up, take Dustin by the hand. "These can end up on the floor too" i say motioning to my sheer lingerie.
"Not yet" he replies, guiding me back to the bedroom.
I find myself once again on Dustin's bed, this time guided into the center, onto my hands and knees. With gentle pressure between my shoulder blades, I drop to my elbows, arching my back and exposing my entrances to open view, my modesty preserved only by the thin g-string buried between my cheeks.
Dustin pulls that to the side, bringing my arousal fully into view. I shudder as a soft, wet tongue traces it's way teasingly between my parted lips, beginning at the bundle of nerves aching in my core and ending in the tight wet hole that's been longing to be filled since I started my teasing back at lunch. I moan a soft sigh of want as Dustin licks me again and again, using his thumbs to spread me open before teasing the inner entrance of my now soaked vagina with his oral stimulation.
After a few breathless minutes of almost over the edge teasing with his tongue, Dustin traces his tongue higher. My eyes go wide and my breath catches in my throat as his tongue glides across my other hole. After a brief pause, he repeats his elongated trail of tongue teasing a second and third time, ending on my bum every time.
I moan "Don't stop, daddy" as his tongue lingers on my hole, swirling around my rear entrance as his calloused fingers reach between my legs to tease my clit. I am so close as his tongue makes headway into my hole which is opening up for him at his constant stimulation.
"I'm going to fill you up baby girl" Dustin leans down and whispers in my ear, his tongue momentarily replaced by his thumb pressing further into my bum, slick with his saliva.
"Please daddy" I moan in reply, eager to keep my promise to do everything his wife won't do.
Dustin pulls away completely and reaches into his wife's nightstand. I see him pull out a bottle of lube and a silver plug with a red jeweled heart on the end, still in its packaging, unopened, unplayed with. I know what's coming and why we're playing this out right now.
Dustin removes the plug from its package and holds it tip first up to my lips. I know what he wants without saying a word. I stick out my tongue and lightly tease the cold metal tip, softly swirling circles around it, further and further down until I bob my head down, taking the whole plug in my mouth and closing my lips around the base. I look up at Dustin, the jeweled heart of the plug between my lips and softly moan in anticipation.
He pulls it out of my mouth and I seductively tease the tip one last time. "Wanna stick it in my ass daddy?" I beg as sexily as possible. After a few seconds of fumbling around with the lube bottle, I feel the cold liquid land on my hole, followed by a finger gently probing my already relaxed entrance. A moment later, the finger is replaced by the cold lubed plug and my breath catches in my throat as I stretch around the plug before closing down tightly on the base. Dustin moves my g-string back into place, covering my soaking wet lips and holding the plug firmly in my butt.
I look back at him pleadingly. I know I teased you hard earlier but if you stop now, this is just cruel. "Daddy please" I say breathlessly, not wanting the stimulation to stop while also acutely aware of the fullness inside my rear.
"Please what?"
"Please fuck me daddy"
"You have two options Hannah. You teased me, so this is a tease for you. You can go to bed, right now, right like this, or you can get your punishment and then a reward like a good girl. Bed or a spanking, your choice"
"Spank me Daddy" I beg without a moment's hesitation
smack the sharp crack of Dustin's hand on my bare cheek takes me by suprise and I clench hard on the plug inside my bum. "Oh fuck daddy" I moan in a mix of pain and pleasure. smack smack smack come three more successive blows, landing on alternating cheeks. I moan almost tearfully as my arousal builds to the point that I'm literally ready to beg for release.
"Daddy please fuck me. Do whatever you want just let me cum please"
A firm tug pulls my g-string down to my knees, still on all fours with my face in the pillows. A hard shaft rubs between my lower lips, finds my eager entrance, and in one firm thrust is buried all the way inside me. I cry out, looking back over my shoulder at Dustin who looks like a man possessed with the overwhelming urge to use me for his pleasure, and in that moment, it's all I want as well.
His firm hands grip my hips and I arch my back, throwing myself back against him to meet his own rapid thrusts. My cheeks clap a faster and faster pace as the overwhelming feeling of being completely filled mixes with the intense pleasure of the moment. I'm red faced and breathless, moaning Dustin's name as he continues in an unrelenting pace, thrusting in and out, in and out. At one point he pulls my face out of the pillows, gripping my long dark hair by my ponytail and commands "You're gonna be a good girl and cum for daddy"
He releases my hair but I remain facing forward, head up and moaning through the moment "Yes daddy, oh my fuuuuuuuuuckkkk" comes from my innocent lips as he simultaneously pulls out the buttplug and buries himself all the way inside me as I can feel him swell and begin to release against my cervix.
"That's right daddy, cum inside my pussy" I beg as he thrusts again and again as my inner walls clench down and my own release spills out of me, uncontained as I find one of the strongest orgasms of my life. His thrusts slow and eventually he pulls out, leaving me leaking cum and lube from both my holes.
He returns with a warm towel and begins to clean me off as I sit up, still in my sheer bra, and kiss him firmly on the lips. "That was incredible, daddy" I whisper, my forehead resting against his as he finishes cleaning my sensitive areas.
"Would you like to rinse off?"
I reply yes and he runs us a sensual warm shower, where nothing but gentle washing and a few lingering kisses happens. He's patient as I take extra time under the soothing water and wraps me in a soft towel when I get out.
As we get dressed into comfy pajama shorts and tshirts, I ask "so was I a good girl, daddy?"
"The best. I think we should stick with this role for awhile if you're into it"
After the time I had tonight, I'm more than willing to play along. We discuss some likes and dislikes and limits (nothing that leaves a mark where I'll have to answer questions about it at work), and reagree that none of this is a thing on the few occasions that his wife visits during her internship. And duh, no telling work, that would fuck us both.
We end the night with gentle pillow talk, and he asks if,for the role, I'd be willing to let him help me get dressed in the mornings, helping me pick out bras and undies from a selection of things I'd actually wear to work. I welcome the increased interaction and dedicated time to talk every morning without a second thought, and I fall asleep with his arm wrapped around me from behind, his strong hand under my tshirt, soothingly placed on my bare stomach, just below my belly button and just teasingly far enough into the area covered by a bikini. I'm in heaven.

I live in rural Australia, seeing a pain specialist takes atleast 6 months to get in as they cover a very large area and there’s only 1 where I live until the next city 4 hours away.
I’ve got 2 bludges with the worst being L5-S1 from a work injury 3 years ago resulting in horrible back pain and sciatica.
I’ve done physio, hydrotherapy, chiropractor, deep tissue massages, CT guided steroid injections and many other things constantly for the last 3 years
After being told surgery won’t fix my pain by 3 different surgeons, I booked a pain specialist thinking I might finally get some help. Every doctor I’ve seen just prescribes anti inflammatories and Panadol (probably because I’m 22m)
I finally see my pain specialist and he wants me to see a psychologist and a physiotherapist! As if this cunt can’t see Ive literally had 50 appointments with 3 different physio’s and saw 2 different psychologists for pain over the last few years. Then he wants me to to drive 4 hours away to a specialist so I can have a nerve blocker needle… not only can I not drive that far I don’t even have a working car but besides that I can’t drive after the needle so I need to organise travel with my insurance company.
It’s such a waste of time and I’m so fed up, the needle provides relief for limited time if it even works at all. he booked all my psychologist and physio appointments in the city on the same day as my needle like what the fuck, I’m not doing any of that and I don’t know how to tell him without blowing up.
I’m just sick of the fuck around and I’m NOT driving for 4 hours for a day procedure which gives relief for a limited time and to see ANOTHER psychologist and physio. I’m so irritable and aggravated from being in agony and watching my friends life progress while I go backwards. I don’t have any patience anymore

The wedding wasn’t what Exuberance had in mind when she was a child–or, rather, when she was an even younger child. No, sixteen isn’t still a child… Right?
For starters, her father wasn’t with her to walk her down the aisle. Secondly, she was marrying a peasant… just a dashing and mysterious and tortured one! Even though he tended to be a little possessive over the kingdom that wasn’t even his yet, and even if he sometimes wore her jewelry without her permission (before losing it), they loved each other! That’s all that mattered.
Exuberance knew how unsightly it was for the Exuberant Lady to be marrying a peasant… BUT THIS WAS HER KINGDOM NOW!
Maybe?
She’ll work that out with Invincible.
Anyway, this day was going to be perfect!
…
The baby cried in Exhuberance’s arms, the exhausted young mother cradling him. This… wasn’t where she was expecting to be within a year. Alone in the birthing room, the midwives have left to fetch food for her and Invincible never shows up.
He’s busy. She said to herself. He’d probably faint while watching anyway! Exuberance laughed at this thought, she’d have to tease Invincible about that some time.
After her son finally fell asleep, and after finally getting food, Invincible finally came in, taking to crouching by the bed. Exuberance smiled at the baby and then at her husband… the two looked so much alike. Their son has inherited Invincible’s darker skin, dark hair, and dark eyes.
“He looks a lot like you, yeah?” The Lady chuckled. “Minus the scowl and the eyebags!”
Invincible looked at her, his eyes flickering with very mild amusement.
Grouch.
Exuberance passed the baby to her husband, who awkwardly cradled him. “Our prince…” He said.
“What should we name him,” the Exuberant lady asked tiredly, her body was slowly shutting down, her energy wasn’t infinite, after all.
“Something noble… hmm,” Invincible looked up thoughtfully. “Undauntable.”
Exuberance cracked up. “Is that a real word?!”
“Oh, please, it doesn’t have to be a real word, it’s a name,” Invincible said, unclear if he was being playful or not.
Exuberance laid back into the bed, her muscles relaxing. “Whatever you say, my liege,” she said with a smirk before dozing off…
Moonwatcher stood there, ready to guide Undauntable to his mother. After a small back and forth before, Wren finally convinced Undauntable to be the one to retrieve his mother with the Night Dragon.
“I’m telling you, I can take care of the city for a day!” Wren said, grinning. “Along with your royal kissups!”
“I’m sure you can, it's just— wait what did you call them? You do realize you’re technically one of those yourself!” Undauntable teased.
“Oh shut up!” Wren laughed.
Moon waited, looking ready for anything… After all, compared to the journeys she’s been on– this is like going to the market. Once Wren notified Jade Mountain Academy’s staff about this mission, Moon got pardoned from school for several days– plenty of time– so all was well.
Undauntable tied his hair back and strode to Moon, due to his Dragon still not being so good, Ivy tagged along.
Every action had a consequence, everything that happened created a new future, and Moon’s powers exploited that fact. They were headed to Safe Harbor, or, rather, the outskirts of it.
Undauntable gave Wren a hug, “I’ll be back soon don’t worry, you won’t be stuck running this place for long,” he said.
They separated, and Undauntable climbed onto Moon, behind Ivy.
“I’ll be FINE,” Wren said with a dismissive hand gesture. “Good luck guys, Pyrriah’s a messy place to travel around.”
And family troubles are even messier… The City Lord added to himself grimly.
…
Safe Harbor wasn’t THAT far away… In the grand scheme of things at least. But Undauntable’s tied stomach made every minute feel like an eternity.
Ivy would relay directions to Moon upon the dragon’s request, and the young City Lord felt proud of himself for understanding what the NightWing was asking. The three flew over a large, large, LARGE muddy expanse, which Ivy explained to be “MudWing territory”. She proceeded to dump MudWing facts on Undauntable, which the City Lord didn’t mind at all.
…
After taking several breaks (Moonwatcher over exerted herself just a tad bit by carrying two humans for a long trip), the trio made it to Safe Harbor. They stopped in view of the city, a chilly breeze swept through and clouds were gray and thick, not a single ray of sunshine to be seen. Undauntable chose to not see this as a bad omen.
The City Lord turned to look at Moon, who, judging by her strained look, was sifting through futures, looking for commonalities in terms of Undauntable’s mother’s location. Ivy, who sat on the nape of the NightWing’s neck, rubbed her head reassuringly.
After a few minutes, Moon perked up and growled something that Undauntable recognized as a “follow me” of sorts.
As the small group walked, Undauntable fidgeted. So long… It’s been so long since he’s seen his mother…
Did she change? Will she be proud of him? Should he leave out the fact that he and his friends beat his father into submission?
Ivy looked back at him. “Soooo, Undauntable, you excited?”
“Oh um,” the Lord perked up. “Yeah, but also nervous.”
The girl's expression softened. “I’m sure everything will be fine, besides, it’s not like you never met her before. And at least she didn’t try to sacrifice you to dragons, like SOME parents we both know.”
“I suppose.”
Ivy pulled her hair out of her ponytail and turned to look ahead. “Point is, you have the right to be nervous, but don’t let that dampen your excitement. I’m happy for you, Undauntable.”
…
The trio continued to trek on through the moistened terrain, reaching a dark forest of fir trees. The sun had set and, since it grew increasingly difficult to follow Moon, Undauntable took to riding on her behind Ivy. The girl was grumbling a conversation to the shy Night Dragon.
The City Lord felt itchy and tired, letting out a yawn.
“Don’t fall asleep on me Undauntable,” Ivy chuckled. “I can’t guarantee how good of a first impression that’d be.”
Eventually, near a shore, light was spotted. Not just any light though, lanterns! Lanterns that belonged to several small cottages.
Undauntable felt Moon’s muscles tense, she must be wondering if these humans would be scared of her… Old habits die hard after all, and some people really get set in their ways. Undauntable listened to the waves lapping at the rocky shore, and felt his nerves cool down.
Until a scream was heard.
An old lady, holding her… regular sized cat… spotted the three (particularly Moon) from her circular window.
In a neighboring cottage, one that was in worse condition than the old woman's, a younger woman slammed open her door. “Hey! Tuna! Can you quit it with your nightly shriek—” the woman interrupted herself upon seeing Moon, her eyes widened.
The warm light of the lanterns was just enough for Undauntable to recognize the woman.
It was her, it was his mother, Exuberance.
The City Lord quickly dismounted Moon and ran to his mother, emotion welling up in his belly.
“Hey! Who are you?!” The woman yelled as Undauntable hugged her.
He realized with a burst of affection that he’s grown taller than her.
Exuberance pushed Undauntable away, creating a separation. However, before she could tell him off, she recognized his face.
“Oh, it’s you, Undauntable! Don’t scare me like that!” She said… almost too casually.
The City Lord smiled. “Mother! I missed you so much!” He went in for another hug.
“Er, I missed you too. By the way, is that your dragon?”
Undauntable turned. “No, that’s my friend, Moonwatcher!"
The woman blinked. “Oh wow, my son, friends with dragons, huh? You sound like that girl I heard about…” She trailed off, the gears in her empty head turning. “The Dragonslayer? No, no, that’s someone else… The Dragonspe– The Dragonspeaker! Yeah, her.”
Undauntable looked back, and saw Ivy (who still sat on the amused Moonwatcher) give him a thumbs up.
“Mother, she’s my girlfriend,” the boy informed her lovingly.
“Who? Her?” Exuberance pointed at Ivy.
“No! The Dragonspeaker!”
Undauntable’s Mother smirked and shook her head. “I have a lot of things to catch up on, huh?”
“Yes!” Undauntable answered eagerly. “And I have so much to tell you!”
“Alright then Undauntable, you and your friends can come inside. Although,” Exuberance glanced at her cottage’s door. “I don’t know how the dragon will fit.”
A/N: I'M BACK. I've been so busy but I haven't gone a day without thinking about updating this fanfic! Sorry for the delay or for any messy writing😭😭😭 Ill TRY to upload the next part soon teehee
Have a good day/night <3

TL;DR - I caught the common cold & woke up with severe nerve pain radiating from my low back down my legs to my foot. What could be the possible cause?
27F. Generally healthy - walks 3mi a day when not in pain. 12 y/o Right Shoulder Injury (Volleyball) - Winging Scapula, Bursitis and Snapping Tendon. Mild Scoliosis. Chronic Back pain. Chronic Joint Pain - full body with an unidentified cause.
I caught the common cold, the next day I woke up with severe sciatica pain. I have had to miss numerous days of work and have been seeing a PT who has been helping. But I am curious - what could be the underlying cause?
The sciatic nerve pain starts in my low back > glute > hamstring > calf to foot. After a while it transitions to my other leg & the fronts of my legs - including my groin area. It starts as numbness, then tingling, then pinpricks, then it feels like sitting on a pile of hot embers. Sitting, standing and laying are all extremely uncomfortable after 10 minutes.
I have been struggling with chronic joint pain that comes and goes for 4 years now. Through that - my doctor and I think there’s something happening as an overactive immune response. We don’t know why - tests are all normal. It seems to get really bad when I am sick, and this time I woke up feeling all stiff and with sciatic nerve pain. I have never had this before but it is very painful. It has been 3 weeks of severe pain and I cannot help but think the sciatica pain to joint pain & stiffness both coming on the day I got sick are linked in some way.
Is it possible that if I do have an underlying undiagnosed autoimmune issue, that my spine could become inflamed or flare up when sick, causing sciatic nerve pain? If so, what are the things I should be asking my doctor to test me for?
I want to prevent this from ever happening again so I can live my life without this much pain. I often travel for work and I would be in a bad spot if this happened when I was away from home.

Hello. I joined this community as soon as I got referred by my obgyn to a doctor who can do a laparoscopy (I guess she isn't the same one who will do it, I do not know this other doctor as well and it is making me nervous). This might get long, but the most important stuff is at the end.
This process really kicked into gear about a year ago, when I stopped taking my birth control and my periods got worse than they ever were before the birth control. Last January, I had debilitating lower back pain that I felt certain was caused by my period, and it was also causing shooting pain in my sciatic nerve. My obgyn wasn't convinced, because it did not stop when my period did, but she recommended a hormonal IUD. That gave me all kinds of weird symptoms, but I assumed that it was just temporary while it was settling in, because the symptoms kept changing.
After 6 months, it had stabilized, but I was having only a week every month where I felt normal. It was followed by a week of terrible cramps, then a week of bleeding (but the cramps did not stop). I went back to the doctor, and she put me on Norethindrone . This eliminated my period and all symptoms for 9 months, until a month ago, when I started having terrible cramps and back pain to the point that I wasn't able to do things anymore. I had a little bit of bleeding, but it stopped soon after (I am still on all the medications so I assume that is why I have not been bleeding much)
I went back to my doctor at the earliest possible moment, and she said that the last thing we could do was a laparoscopy, and sent me for a consultation with a different doctor at her office. I have stayed on my medications, and I was prescribed meloxicam by my PCP.
At the consultation appointment, he asked questions, including whether I even wanted the surgery, which was weird to me because I had been referred to him for a consultation for a laparoscopy, not to get the same treatment that recently stopped working. I told him that my other doctor said that she thinks the only option at this point was to do a lap, and he said he agreed with her on that. I have a laparoscopy scheduled in a few weeks and my pre op is in two days.
The thing that has been concerning me though is that I brought up the idea that the endometriosis might be growing on my sciatic nerve. The sciatica came back right when this month+ long "period" started (I have been having the same levels of pain, both in my uterus and in my back for a little over a month at this point) and I am sure that it is related. The doctor didn't dismiss it per se, but he did suggest that he wouldn't be able to fix it with surgery, and said that it would need to be addressed with hormones. I don't know what that means, because I have been on hormones for a long time now and clearly it has stopped working.
I thought maybe I was just being paranoid, because in researching the connections with sciatica and endo, it seems to be a very rare case that it could be growing on my sciatic nerve, but I saw someone comment on this sub recently about how that's what was causing her sciatica, and I am now worried if I'm going to the right doctor for me. There is another doctor who can do it at this clinic, but I feel like I'm just so close that I don't want to have to go to a different doctor and reschedule everything (it was over a month out to schedule this one, I don't want to keep suffering)
So I want to bring this up at my pre op appointment. I want to ask him about if he can look in that area for endometriosis if he finds it in other places. But I don't really know the best way to address it or how to advocate for myself if he dismisses my concerns.
Thank you in advance.

I am looking specifically at a position with a software consulting group on the west coast, USA.
All advice is very appreciated!
https://preview.redd.it/mkg54cjjun1d1.png?width=1700&format=png&auto=webp&s=82470d8d7ce236ee126205a7ea428dc2aaacfb39

Hello all. I’ve been a lurker for a few weeks but am hoping some of you can weigh in! I saw my gyno doc on 4/15 to discuss worsening symptoms associated with my cycle, namely extremely heavy bleeding, period bleeding starting/stopping, clots, excruciatingly painful cramps. I have long suspected I have endometriosis and assumed it was all related to that. My doc ordered an ultrasound, which I had on 4/23. Ultrasound showed a single, 9.5 cm fibroid. Suddenly so much made sense! The constant belly bloat, looking 5 mos pregnant, wondering if even the intense sciatic pain that started several months ago would be related? Also had a VERY extensive bloodwork panel done, and my ferritin level is extremely low (it’s 9) - maybe explaining my constant, unrelenting fatigue? Anyway, since my ultrasound, my symptoms have gotten exponentially worse. The pain this cycle was not just isolated to the few days before/during my period, but has been constant. My biggest concern right now is this intense pain I’ve had on my left side/left flank for about a week. It feels like a combination of constant intense dull ache/burning/tearing? Idk how else to describe it. I am concerned it’s related to my kidney bc I’m also having issues peeing (my fibroid is on my left side). Or could this be nerve pain from the fibroid pressing? Anyway, I have my follow up appointment with my doc tomorrow to discuss the ultrasound, MRI (had that last week) and bloodwork, and I’m trying to be as prepared as possible with all the questions. I could manage the pelvic pain ok, but this intense side/flank pain is making it hard to function. I want to make sure I’m taken seriously and that I get to the bottom of what might be causing this. I read through a lot of posts on this sub but couldn’t find anything that described a “burning” type pain so I thought I’d ask. Sorry for the long post, thanks for any help!

Critical emotional damage in the most harrowing campaign I’ve ever played (Exalted 2.5e)
My campaign is a mixed-format live audio sessions and play-by-post text roleplay Exalted 2.5e campaign that’s now been ongoing for the past 5 months. It’s now 15 sessions and 60+ text sessions deep, but has somehow never stopped breaking new ground in psychic damage and soul-wrenching drama. This just happened last weekend in the play-by-text portion, and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as we did playing it.
Relevant characters:
Gold (PC), just some guy, a revolutionary rebellion leader who died in the course of anti-establishment activities and re-awakened as an Abyssal Exalt, now grappling with his new nature, still dedicated to the idea of doing good for the world.
Ayesha Ura (NPC), a socialite sorceress, an ancient legendary Elder Sidereal Exalt, who has been trying her best to actively do good for 1,500 years now, working in Heaven to protect the entire world and keep it all together. Ayesha truly and sincerely believes that the ancient Solar Exalted god-kings murdered and cast out of the world by her ex, who just recently returned and have been causing chaos anew, can do great and good things for the world, if only she could show them how. She is the one who arranged for the entire circle of PCs to have their powers, and has been guiding, watching, and judging them from the shadows until she recently revealed herself and invited them all to a party at her house to cast prophecies to the stars and decide upon the future of the world together.
Thei (PC), a slick socialite conman, an Infernal Exalt empowered by the Ebon Dragon, the primordial principle of deceit, antagonism, evil and scumbaggery itself, whose entire motivation is to spite the Ebon Dragon. Some of his powers allow him to tear down the successes and defenses of other characters, other powers allow him to be a wish-granting genie, granting magical miracles and wishes nearly without limit, while un-knowingly ensnaring them into punishing debts to him. Out of spite to the Ebon Dragon, Thei is committed to using these toxic, antagonistic powers selflessly to recklessly do good. Thei has a demon familiar named Lucy, a child of the Ebon Dragon, a mischievous creature embedded as an eternal companion into his soul.
And this is what happened Saturday night.
Gold had been interrogating Ayesha, feeling outraged and manipulated about Ayesha withholding information from the party about the monsters she sent them to kill, and Ayesha replied with piercing questions about the tension between ideological purity and radical honesty, vs the necessities of being efficient and effective at dealing with the overwhelmingly huge tide of problems the world is constantly facing. Ayesha points out how irrelevant the monster’s backstory is towards what it has become and how necessary its destruction was, and she tells him that once he has actively worked at actually trying to do good for as long as she has, he will get it too. He sees how dedicated she is to her work, how deeply she truly believes in what she is doing, and how profoundly ancient with exhaustion this beautiful, graceful, socially magnificent party-girl of a woman actually is.
It hits hard enough to make both Gold and the player behind him, think hard and question their own ideals, thinking he will never become like her but fearing that she’s right.
She asks him about another Exalt, a Solar named Mikal who is new to her but an old friend of Gold’s. And Gold tells her much, but, feeling like she is too devastated already to hear everything that he knows, he chooses to withhold some things from her, for her own sake.
Exactly as Ayesha just predicted he would.
Gold rolls against Ayesha’s mental defenses, and scores very high, but not high enough to beat her razor-sharp social senses.
In discord, I see Thei begin to type, obviously wanting to use his Shadow-Spite Curse to tear down Ayesha’s defenses and aid Gold’s success, but I know he is completely out of essence for his powers, having tapped himself out in his last encounter, and I see him stop typing. I drop an out-of-character aside about how tapped out he is, to rofl reactions all ‘round as Gold and Ayesha continue.
Ayesha notices Gold withholding information, but, exhausted and mostly tapped out herself, decides to trust his judgement in keeping things from her instead of pressing the issue, and feels smug that he is already doing what she predicted.
Gold pivots, and asks her how she’s feeling, how she’s holding up, and asks when’s the last time she actually allowed herself to rest. And the ancient elder Sidereal, weighted with the burden of having to be way too mature for way too long, takes a moment to actually relax and act childish, flopping down onto the chaise, burying her face under a mountain of pillows, and dumping her feelings, whining about how precariously the entire world is currently teetering on the edge of catastrophe, and how she’s feeling about her personal quest to sculpt the PC party into a force capable of carrying that burden, and the pressure of doing it soon enough that they are in place to catch the pieces BEFORE the Realm, the current imperial superpower of the world, falls apart, or else an unthinkably massive amount of people are going to die in the aftermath.
Blown away by the human side of Ayesha, coming out from beneath all her layers of politics, maneuvering, and poise, he suggests that, if she can’t take a vacation, she should at least make a pillow fort to rest in. And Ayesha responds by transforming her magitech couch into a fort, with herself already inside.
Gold goes to the fort entrance, playing along asking for permission to enter, and Ayesha, in a silly voice, makes a 4th wall reference to the call-and-response codewords that another PC invented ages ago, which the rest of the players had cared so little for and were so incapable of remembering that it had become a running joke.
Gold replies, with the correct response and is welcomed into the pillow fort, and somehow, in this campaign, our characters themselves, are now roleplaying with each other.
Ayesha casts an anti-scrying warding spell, using discord’s spoiler formatting to black-bar everything she says and teaches Gold the formatting for how to do the same, shrouding the whole conversation so that everyone else reading the chat has to break the 4th wall themselves to read this dialogue.
And Gold proceeds to lightly jokingly antagonize Ayesha about her own mental health, and when she’s ever going to take a break.
And somehow, Lucy appears inside the fort with them. Dark, cozy corner, shrouded with wards, filled with playful antagonism? Lucy bursts into the spoiler-tagged, shrouded conversation with the exuberance of a child going “ooh ooh ooh me too can I play too am I doing this right?”
Gold and Ayesha are both surprised but welcome Lucy’s presence, and the three of them continue playing on.
Eventually, I rule that this entire conversation counts as a dramatic action of Gold attempting to cheer Ayesha up, and I ask Gold to make a heavily advantaged roll against Ayesha’s mental defenses.
Breaths are held as Gold rolls, and… Failure. Ayesha’s emotional walls are just too strong, and Gold’s persuasion misses.
I see Thei’s player active in other channels on the server, online and talking out-of-character with people about art.
So Lucy slides into Thei’s secret player-and-DM channel. “Thei are you there? Are you there? I need you RIGHT NOW. Do you have essence for a Shadow Spite Curse?”
At this point Thei has no idea what’s going on in the RP game channel, but says “No I don’t.”
Lucy says, “I’ve got a deal for you. Please, I have 20 motes of essence, please take them right now, Ayesha needs help. I can gift you these motes and I won’t ask for much in return pleeeeease do this for me right now!”
Thei, who has never refused an obvious trap in his entire life, knows this is going to hurt, and cannot wait to find out how, says “I accept!”, overflowing with dread as he does.
Boom, 20 motes of essence received.
Lucy points Thei back to the channel, he sees the most recent roll, and announces that he activates Shadow Spite Curse, to tear Ayesha’s defenses down so that Gold’s cheer hits, instead.
Ayesha starts giggling, then laughing, then breaking down completely with hideously joyful, cackling laughter as Gold’s efforts do hit her after all, and she recovers some willpower as she allows herself, for the first time in far too long, to actually feel a feeling and be a person again. She laughs so joyfully that she shatters her own silencing wards, and her laughter echoes throughout the entire space of her party.
Inside the pillow fort and inside Thei’s head, Lucy says, “I did it! I saved Ayesha!”, and then, she begins to fade.
Inside Thei’s head, Lucy is exuberant. “I saved someone, Thei! Just like you do! I saved Ayesha! I did it!”
She starts to fade. “Hey, here’s what I want from you in exchange for those motes. Please, just, stay alive, okay? Please still be here when I return. You dummy.”
And with that, she’s gone, having just transmuted her entire self into raw power for Thei’s use. And, with a feeling as un-nerving as his own heartbeat stopping, the absence of something that’s been with him for so long that he has never known life without it, he is suddenly alone inside his own head.
In the chat, the response is: … … … … …
Thei immediately begins melting down with panic, freaking out, screaming at Lucy demanding she come back.
…. ..
He continues panicking, desperately trying to cope, telling himself that if greater demons come back from death surely his friend could, too.
…. . ._. .
He keeps on freaking out, grieving over what he’s done, even as Ayesha’s joyful laughter fills his ears, his private chat greeted by nothing but ellipsis.
,.. .., ,, ,, ,.,,
Thei says, to the silence, “what do I do?”
I ask him to make an Int+ Occult check.
He succeeds on the roll.
I send him in reply… a Morse Code table, and sit back cackling as I wait for him to realize, then go back and translate all the “silence” he was getting.
“S S S S S”
“H I”
“H E R E”
“D U M M Y”
Somehow, Thei finds yet another depth of anguish and psychic pain, screaming at Lucy that she’d torment him like this and promising to kill her himself if she wasn’t already dead right now, for doing this to him.
One last message comes through the ellipsis for him:
“L O L L M A O”
And that moment was where the live-session would start the next day.

Critical emotional damage in the most harrowing campaign I’ve ever played (Exalted 2.5e)
My campaign is a mixed-format live audio sessions and play-by-post text roleplay Exalted 2.5e campaign that’s now been ongoing for the past 5 months. It’s now 15 sessions and 60+ text sessions deep, but has somehow never stopped breaking new ground in psychic damage and soul-wrenching drama. This just happened last weekend in the play-by-text portion, and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as we did playing it.
Relevant characters:
Gold (PC), just some guy, a revolutionary rebellion leader who died in the course of anti-establishment activities and re-awakened as an Abyssal Exalt, now grappling with his new nature, still dedicated to the idea of doing good for the world.
Ayesha Ura (NPC), a socialite sorceress, an ancient legendary Elder Sidereal Exalt, who has been trying her best to actively do good for 1,500 years now, working in Heaven to protect the entire world and keep it all together. Ayesha truly and sincerely believes that the ancient Solar Exalted god-kings murdered and cast out of the world by her ex, who just recently returned and have been causing chaos anew, can do great and good things for the world, if only she could show them how. She is the one who arranged for the entire circle of PCs to have their powers, and has been guiding, watching, and judging them from the shadows until she recently revealed herself and invited them all to a party at her house to cast prophecies to the stars and decide upon the future of the world together.
Thei (PC), a slick socialite conman, an Infernal Exalt empowered by the Ebon Dragon, the primordial principle of deceit, antagonism, evil and scumbaggery itself, whose entire motivation is to spite the Ebon Dragon. Some of his powers allow him to tear down the successes and defenses of other characters, other powers allow him to be a wish-granting genie, granting magical miracles and wishes nearly without limit, while un-knowingly ensnaring them into punishing debts to him. Out of spite to the Ebon Dragon, Thei is committed to using these toxic, antagonistic powers selflessly to recklessly do good. Thei has a demon familiar named Lucy, a child of the Ebon Dragon, a mischievous creature embedded as an eternal companion into his soul.
And this is what happened Saturday night.
Gold had been interrogating Ayesha, feeling outraged and manipulated about Ayesha withholding information from the party about the monsters she sent them to kill, and Ayesha replied with piercing questions about the tension between ideological purity and radical honesty, vs the necessities of being efficient and effective at dealing with the overwhelmingly huge tide of problems the world is constantly facing. Ayesha points out how irrelevant the monster’s backstory is towards what it has become and how necessary its destruction was, and she tells him that once he has actively worked at actually trying to do good for as long as she has, he will get it too. He sees how dedicated she is to her work, how deeply she truly believes in what she is doing, and how profoundly ancient with exhaustion this beautiful, graceful, socially magnificent party-girl of a woman actually is.
It hits hard enough to make both Gold and the player behind him, think hard and question their own ideals, thinking he will never become like her but fearing that she’s right.
She asks him about another Exalt, a Solar named Mikal who is new to her but an old friend of Gold’s. And Gold tells her much, but, feeling like she is too devastated already to hear everything that he knows, he chooses to withhold some things from her, for her own sake.
Exactly as Ayesha just predicted he would.
Gold rolls against Ayesha’s mental defenses, and scores very high, but not high enough to beat her razor-sharp social senses.
In discord, I see Thei begin to type, obviously wanting to use his Shadow-Spite Curse to tear down Ayesha’s defenses and aid Gold’s success, but I know he is completely out of essence for his powers, having tapped himself out in his last encounter, and I see him stop typing. I drop an out-of-character aside about how tapped out he is, to rofl reactions all ‘round as Gold and Ayesha continue.
Ayesha notices Gold withholding information, but, exhausted and mostly tapped out herself, decides to trust his judgement in keeping things from her instead of pressing the issue, and feels smug that he is already doing what she predicted.
Gold pivots, and asks her how she’s feeling, how she’s holding up, and asks when’s the last time she actually allowed herself to rest. And the ancient elder Sidereal, weighted with the burden of having to be way too mature for way too long, takes a moment to actually relax and act childish, flopping down onto the chaise, burying her face under a mountain of pillows, and dumping her feelings, whining about how precariously the entire world is currently teetering on the edge of catastrophe, and how she’s feeling about her personal quest to sculpt the PC party into a force capable of carrying that burden, and the pressure of doing it soon enough that they are in place to catch the pieces BEFORE the Realm, the current imperial superpower of the world, falls apart, or else an unthinkably massive amount of people are going to die in the aftermath.
Blown away by the human side of Ayesha, coming out from beneath all her layers of politics, maneuvering, and poise, he suggests that, if she can’t take a vacation, she should at least make a pillow fort to rest in. And Ayesha responds by transforming her magitech couch into a fort, with herself already inside.
Gold goes to the fort entrance, playing along asking for permission to enter, and Ayesha, in a silly voice, makes a 4th wall reference to the call-and-response codewords that another PC invented ages ago, which the rest of the players had cared so little for and were so incapable of remembering that it had become a running joke.
Gold replies, with the correct response and is welcomed into the pillow fort, and somehow, in this campaign, our characters themselves, are now roleplaying with each other.
Ayesha casts an anti-scrying warding spell, using discord’s spoiler formatting to black-bar everything she says and teaches Gold the formatting for how to do the same, shrouding the whole conversation so that everyone else reading the chat has to break the 4th wall themselves to read this dialogue.
And Gold proceeds to lightly jokingly antagonize Ayesha about her own mental health, and when she’s ever going to take a break.
And somehow, Lucy appears inside the fort with them. Dark, cozy corner, shrouded with wards, filled with playful antagonism? Lucy bursts into the spoiler-tagged, shrouded conversation with the exuberance of a child going “ooh ooh ooh me too can I play too am I doing this right?”
Gold and Ayesha are both surprised but welcome Lucy’s presence, and the three of them continue playing on.
Eventually, I rule that this entire conversation counts as a dramatic action of Gold attempting to cheer Ayesha up, and I ask Gold to make a heavily advantaged roll against Ayesha’s mental defenses.
Breaths are held as Gold rolls, and… Failure. Ayesha’s emotional walls are just too strong, and Gold’s persuasion misses.
I see Thei’s player active in other channels on the server, online and talking out-of-character with people about art.
So Lucy slides into Thei’s secret player-and-DM channel. “Thei are you there? Are you there? I need you RIGHT NOW. Do you have essence for a Shadow Spite Curse?”
At this point Thei has no idea what’s going on in the RP game channel, but says “No I don’t.”
Lucy says, “I’ve got a deal for you. Please, I have 20 motes of essence, please take them right now, Ayesha needs help. I can gift you these motes and I won’t ask for much in return pleeeeease do this for me right now!”
Thei, who has never refused an obvious trap in his entire life, knows this is going to hurt, and cannot wait to find out how, says “I accept!”, overflowing with dread as he does.
Boom, 20 motes of essence received.
Lucy points Thei back to the channel, he sees the most recent roll, and announces that he activates Shadow Spite Curse, to tear Ayesha’s defenses down so that Gold’s cheer hits, instead.
Ayesha starts giggling, then laughing, then breaking down completely with hideously joyful, cackling laughter as Gold’s efforts do hit her after all, and she recovers some willpower as she allows herself, for the first time in far too long, to actually feel a feeling and be a person again. She laughs so joyfully that she shatters her own silencing wards, and her laughter echoes throughout the entire space of her party.
Inside the pillow fort and inside Thei’s head, Lucy says, “I did it! I saved Ayesha!”, and then, she begins to fade.
Inside Thei’s head, Lucy is exuberant. “I saved someone, Thei! Just like you do! I saved Ayesha! I did it!”
She starts to fade. “Hey, here’s what I want from you in exchange for those motes. Please, just, stay alive, okay? Please still be here when I return. You dummy.”
And with that, she’s gone, having just transmuted her entire self into raw power for Thei’s use. And, with a feeling as un-nerving as his own heartbeat stopping, the absence of something that’s been with him for so long that he has never known life without it, he is suddenly alone inside his own head.
In the chat, the response is: … … … … …
Thei immediately begins melting down with panic, freaking out, screaming at Lucy demanding she come back.
…. ..
He continues panicking, desperately trying to cope, telling himself that if greater demons come back from death surely his friend could, too.
…. . ._. .
He keeps on freaking out, grieving over what he’s done, even as Ayesha’s joyful laughter fills his ears, his private chat greeted by nothing but ellipsis.
,.. .., ,, ,, ,.,,
Thei says, to the silence, “what do I do?”
I ask him to make an Int+ Occult check.
He succeeds on the roll.
I send him in reply… a Morse Code table, and sit back cackling as I wait for him to realize, then go back and translate all the “silence” he was getting.
“S S S S S”
“H I”
“H E R E”
“D U M M Y”
Somehow, Thei finds yet another depth of anguish and psychic pain, screaming at Lucy that she’d torment him like this and promising to kill her himself if she wasn’t already dead right now, for doing this to him.
One last message comes through the ellipsis for him:
“L O L L M A O”
And that moment was where the live-session would start the next day.

[ First / Previous ]
Memory Transcript Subject: Vili, Venlil Citizen
Date [standardized human time]: December 1st, 2136
The absent adults were due to arrive any time by now. I navigated the crowd of children who milled about the field, taking a head count to ensure everyone was in sight.
Those who had family attending the excursion were bubbling with excitement to see their relatives while a couple others trailed behind me, asking me yet more banal questions about venlil society and how it feels to have fur and a tail.
“I’ll let you in on a secret,” I had told April once. “It’s really, really… itchy. Have you ever had a bug crawling on you? Feels just like that. All the time.”
Chihiro didn’t approve as much of me saying that but Mercy seemed to enjoy the reaction I managed to get from the other kids. While I felt bad for exploiting the apparent human fear of insects, they were quick to forgive me, citing they “couldn't stay mad at a face like mine.”
Truthfully, I too began to enjoy seeing the children react to the things I'd tell them; the genuine nature in everything they did was more than I'd have expected from humans when I first arrived. Some of them would watch me with curiosity and wonder as we spoke, reminding me that this was a species who had only just been introduced onto the galactic stage and still had cause to gawk at the aliens.
Well, most of them.
Toward the edge of the gaggle of children was Lukas, moping away while trying to hide the black eye Amber had given him. A part of me was - flattered - disappointed that she'd risk herself to enact retaliation on my behalf, but I knew she wouldn't understand me were I to even tell her off about it.
Over the last few weeks, I'd gotten to know many of the children, though Lukas remained as distant as ever. In a way, I felt pity to see him so small even after witnessing the pleasure he got from putting others down and how infuriating I found his antics. He was full of anger and clearly had it misdirected at all non-humans for the actions of those who participated in the extermination fleet - at least he has reason.
I brushed at my ear to ward off the tingling sensation and let out an irritated growl. My hackles raised when I heard a sympathetic growl come from behind.
Turning about, I found that the source was Amber, also swiping at her ear in a mimicry of my action. I was far less bothered by her giddy snarl after having her do it every time she approached me, though it didn't make the itch at my back from almost jumping in fear go away.
“You do that a lot,” Amber giggled. “Is your ear itchy? Wait, don't answer that because I won't understand it.”
My ears whirled about and I tilted my head slightly to look directly at the strange little girl who'd been so eager to make friends with me from the very beginning. I'd accepted that, at least in her eyes, I was “Luka” and that I existed for her to talk to endlessly about her favorite hobbies despite her knowing she wouldn't understand anything I said in response.
Even then, I was still rather worried that I'd been so frequent with admonishing the more - sensible - pushy one that Amber had taken note. How many others could have noticed? I wasn't even sure how humans viewed me, but it wouldn't matter so much now that I was getting ready to return home to Luka.
I took a seat on the grass and found myself surrounded by a small following of kids that did the same. Amber, too, took a seat, but directly on my lap instead. I grunted as the surprisingly heavy child settled and I brought her head upon my scruff, allowing her to play with my paw.
“You only have three fingers and a thumb. That's pretty weird.”
“And you only have hair on the top of your head, that’s pretty weird too.”
“I’ll assume you were giving me a compliment…”
The other of the kids understood me and giggled at the back and forth as Amber raked a nail under my claws. While I was certain they were clean, Amber's scrutinizing stare felt as if I was being judged by my mother again.
“Your nails feel like a dog's. Maybe not as sharp.”
My translator interpreted that word as a “domesticated Terran predator” and I flicked my tail in indignation. I'd tried to shut out those who claimed I had traits akin to Earth fauna, though the accusations kept coming regardless.
From what I'd gathered, they believed my fur resembled that of a “sheep”, my tail and paws resembled a “cat”, and my ears were that of a “bunny”; now, I could add claws of a “dog” to that list. I had to keep reminding myself these humans didn't grow up knowing any other metric than that of the creatures from their home planet.
I knew the Terran Richard would return in the group that was due to arrive - Ma had made a point to inform me of such. The mention of the human's name spoiled my mood each time he was mentioned, and yet the Blackfox women continued to speak of him as though he was the most harmless thing.
I was not over the way he seemed to look down on my brother as an obedient servant, laying hands on him as though he were a dumb animal rather than a person. Luka had been the pillar that held me up since we were barely able to walk and talk, and it burned me up inside to see him crave the validation of predators when I knew he didn’t need it.
Amber, seemingly bored with one paw, grabbed the other as I let my arm remain limp. At first, I felt only the tickle as she played at the knuckles on this one as well, but there was a pause as she turned it over to face the palm outwards.
“Where'd you get this?”
I looked at my own palm and felt my heart skip a beat as Amber's claw pointed directly at the cut in my paw. I'd thought she had noticed it before, but the fact she'd call attention to it now when I was surrounded by the other children made a chill run up my back. I was still uncertain if bloodlust was a learned trait, and so being surrounded by juvenile predators at a moment like this did not sit well with me.
Trying to retract my paw, a lump raised in my throat as the human child’s grip hardened on my wrist. The other children watched with curiosity and neither of my assistants nor Martha were around to call for advice. I was to settle this on my own.
I asked with a shaky tone, “Amber?”
She rolled her head back until the tip of my snout brushed against her forehead. I got to look into the depths of her arboreal eyes, letting me see every red-blooded vein, every muscle twitch, every flash as they glistened in the red sun's light while the predator gave me her full, undivided attention. She even offered me her usual flash of the teeth. “Yeah?”
“Pah… Per… Pwers?”
I wiggled my arm in an attempt to indicate what I was asking to have released.
“Hold on, I'll let go in a sec.”
She understood me this time, but I sighed as she promptly ignored my request. She once again played with my claws, twisting them back and forth gently as she hummed to herself.
“Looks like it was made by your claws,” she concluded while continuing to toy with them. “This is why my momma always had us trim Butterscotch's claws, because she kept scratching me up when we played.”
The name once again tripped up my translator, describing it as a candy made from melted sugar and congealed milk fat. I tried to suppress the bile that built in my throat as I considered that worse than the item's description was the fact that she'd named an animal which had a reputation for scratching her after it.
Please, please don't throw away everything we'd built in this one moment.
“I miss Butterscotch,” she muttered. “But now I have new friends! Alien-friends!”
She rolled her head back again and looked back up at me.
“Like you! We're friends, right Luka?”
Her eyes shone with bright innocence and juvenile glee, making my fears melt away.
“Ie-e… I’ezz, frn'dz,” I confirmed. Apparently, my vocals didn't lend themselves to speaking Amber's tongue any better than hers did mine. Every word I spoke felt as though I needed to clear my throat after.
“Cool!”
With that conclusion, the dark-haired girl snapped back to my arm and pressed her lips to the back of my paw. I went slack as she did so and it felt as though all of my muscles had lost their function at once as I sat motionless and silent. I could see and hear the world around me and yet it didn't register that anything existed.
I felt her face lift from my flesh and Amber proclaimed proudly, “Momma did that every time I got bruised up and told me it helped with healing! So maybe you'll get better too!”
“Ah-hah,” was the only response I could manage, made on impulse as the rest of my brain felt a million light years away.
“Alright, everyone,” a voice called from behind us. “They're here, so clear out so they have somewhere to park!”
There was a commotion as the children all scrambled to their feet, including Amber, and they rushed with zealous squeals back toward the body of the camp. But not me.
My jaw remained slack as I stared at the back of my paw, focusing on the wet spot imprinted in my fur. It was a bite of sorts, described exactly as Tac had told me, and yet not a mark was left on my flesh save for the tingling of nerves as I seized up.
My back hit the grass and I let my tail curl around my leg as I held my paw to the sky. “Wuh…”
Something approached and kicked up the grass as I laid still and glared at my decidedly unharmed paw. My eyes traveled up to find Mercy standing over me with the corners of her mouth turned downwards.
“You good?”
“Why did you bite Tac?”
“Lord help us all,” she mumbled while rolling her eyes. “C'mon, let's get you outta here before you’re turned into ven-paté under some truck.”
“Uh huh.”
The elder teen’s grip helped me to my feet as I regained faculties, though I still felt weak. “It was a legitimate question, though,” I told her.
“It's just a sign of affection, I guess. I never really considered it so much before, y’know? It's not like you really think about why everything is when it's so normal, right?”
Speak for yourself, I wanted to tell her, though I held my tongue.
As I took a seat, the thrumming of engines could be heard coming from over the brow of the hill. Apparating as though it were a giant, segmented insect were the adult humans in their ramshackle vehicles, rattling down the hill with each occupied by at least five or six bodies in each of the dozen autos.
The children and elders alike rushed to greet their family as they parked and disembarked from the chain of gas guzzlers. Parents lifted their children in the air and hugged them while the elders chatted with them. But among the troupe of humans that had arrived, I knew something felt off.
“They’re one vehicle short,” I noted to Mercy.
“Hm?”
“I counted them when they left. They’re one short.”
Her piercing gaze scanned the fleet herself before she nodded. “Mike’s missing.”
Michael was the driver that Richard had departed with and so that helped explain the deadpan Terran’s absence. Luka and Hileen both recounted the same human by name when talking of their experiences with them, with both drawing the conclusion that he had to be the worst driver on Venlil Prime.
“Psst,” came a voice hissing from behind. “Mercy.”
Mercy turned to give attention to Tac as he sulked away from the crowd as usual, though I remained with my back turned to him while watching the humans interact.
The tip of my tail tickled at the grass watching children get smothered in affection by their parents, and they in turn received hugs from their elders as others chattered. I itched at the back of my palm where Amber's mouth had been as Johnny's parents each planted a similar bite on his cheek and forehead. Chihiro carried her brother on her shoulders as she chatted with her own parents with brimming snarls.
“Looks like Mike had a bit too much fun and ran his truck off the road,” Mercy told me as she came back from talking with Tac. “They're on their way.”
“I can do without seeing Crow.”
“Yeah, well, I could do with a place to practice rock climbing, but we can't always get what we want.”
“You humans really are strange for wanting to climb stuff.”
“It's in our nature, no matter how deeply buried.”
She playfully bumped me on the shoulder and I returned with a gentle lashing of my tail against her ankle to which she welcomed with hissing laughter. The teenager wandered off in the direction of her family's tent.
The crowd that had gathered to greet the returning humans was slowly beginning to disperse as the vehicles were unloaded of a variety of equipment. I was relieved to find that there were no signs of blood or death to be seen, assuaging the deep-seated worry that I had of the humans being on the hunt. As little trust as I had for Crow, there'd be no redeeming one so sordid as himself were he to be everything he was as well as a murderer.
I looked forward to seeing Luka again, even if the only thing he had to tell me was stories of his human coworkers. Perhaps now I had stories of my own experiences with humans to tell him and maybe I'd get to see that glimmer in his eye once again that had so long ago been tarnished.
Amber's delighted shrieks were heard over the commotion and I could spot her being held in the air above her father's head as her toothy snarl became somehow wider. Her legs kicked while she wriggled in the hefty human’s embrace and turned attention to her mother as she was lowered into her grasp.
Even here amongst predators, thoughts of home still hounded me. The closest I could recall mom or dad ever coming to that was when they brought me along to one of their outings for dinner where I was allowed to pick the venue. I was still not permitted to talk to other people even then, but I didn't mind at the time.
The gurgle of another gas-powered engine roared over the brow of the hill, prompting a few others and I to turn our attention upwards.
Breaching the horizon came the last truck, though I was curious to note that it appeared to be driving backwards. Tilting my head didn't give me any more of a vantage to figure out why the truck backed up down the hill, nor did it help decipher the mindless chanting that ramped up as the vehicle closed the distance.
“John Wayne's teeth, hey-a
John Wayne's teeth, hey-a
Are they plastic, are they steel-a”
A claw tapping me on the shoulder spooked me, though I had grown to suppress the instinct to jump and make a fuss. “Momma would like to talk before we send you off,” Mercy told me. “She's in our tent.”
I obeyed the summons, almost forgetting how to navigate the maze of rickety shacks and tents to find the Blackfoxes’ residence. It was a simple task, though, once I remembered that the elder sibling had given it a “groovy” paint job.
Approaching the government-issued yurt that had been painted with vivid flowers, I found it odd for it to not have a horde of humans gathered around. They'd typically mill about Martha's tent while she spoke with each of them about their concerns, though what became of their talks was beyond my knowledge.
I ducked inside without notifying Martha, finding her seated at the squat table that was situated in the middle of the tent. The matriarch turned her eyes up to face me and she happily set her insulated cup down.
“There's not really any room for more chairs,” she told me. “But feel free to take a seat anywhere.”
My ears gently brushed against the top of the tent before I sat down just to the right of where she rested. In this claustrophobic environment, I'd have assumed I was being lured into a trap before. At the very least, I still kept my ears on a swivel for signs of trouble, but now confidence outweighed caution.
We sat for a moment without saying anything as Ma adjusted her seat to look at me directly, leaning an elbow against the table as she reclined.
She asked, “Enjoy your stay?”
I scratched the scruff on my neck as I wondered that myself.
“No. Not at first.”
“But now you can say you did?”
“Everything here is a new experience. For me, and possibly every other person who'd have grown up under the Federation.”
“You pulled through, despite being surrounded by predators. That's more than can be said for the lady who stabbed a guy in panic on the first day of the Exchange Program.”
My ear waggled in entertainment to think someone had set the bar so low. What fool would brazenly assault a predator to begin with?
“There were a few times where I thought I'd need to run for the hills,” I explained. “The children you raise are an unadulterated look into what life was like back on Earth, if nothing else.”
Martha chuckled and covered her snarl with a palm as she spoke, “I will choose to believe that's a compliment, given your opinion on us before.”
“I'd say it's a stellar review in the face of almost drowning while under your employment.”
Her face fell a bit and she rubbed the back of her neck while averting her eyes. “Yeah…”
“That is to say!” I blurted out hastily. “Th-that everything else has made it worth my time.”
My desperation to clarify myself felt embarrassing and my ears turned warm as they went flush. Martha sat still for a moment before she spoke again.
“When Richard hired you, he told me you wanted to up your price. 1200 credits?”
“It's a big ask in hindsight, I know. I didn't realize how tight your budget was at the time and I'm grateful that you've offered me—”
She waved a hand with a shushing hiss.
“We don't need to worry so much about that now. Where I was going with that was, that you agreed to our terms yourself, and accepted with only a reasonable upcharge. No other local would've been so quick to take on this job for even quadruple the price!”
“Brashness is a quality of mine I'm becoming more familiar with,” I joked.
“Must be something in the water. But payment is why I summoned you here, actually. We have only a few members who were on board with having an ‘alien’ presiding over the children, and fewer still who contributed any funds.”
“So what you're offering is out of the pocket of only a couple of contributors. I see.”
“I hope it doesn't lessen your opinion of us to tell you that.”
I scratched my snout and exhaled, shaking free the impulse to inquire any further with a flick of my ear.
“So I suppose all there is left to do is arrange payment, and I'll be on my way?”
“It would seem so.”
Heavy footsteps shuffled across the grass outside though conversation from the crowd remained distant. They stopped right outside of the entrance and the canvas foyer rattled as knuckles rapped against the cloth.
“Martha, it's me,” growled a familiar voice. “Everyone decent?”
“You’re clear, come on in.”
The flap shot open and my paw balled into a fist as Richard froze upon spotting me. The predator’s blank gaze didn’t hide their confusion when I could clearly spot their eyes flicking between Martha and I.
“Sorry, am I interrupting something?” Crow asked.
“We were just finishing up,” I responded, making no effort to hide my contempt for the interloper's presence.
Martha waved a hand to one of the chairs. “Have a seat, and I'll be right with you.”
Richard seemed almost deflated as he sulked over to the table. I resisted the opportunity to trip him with my tail in front of Martha to humiliate him, instead glowering at him as he afforded me a quick glance. I turned my attention back to the leader figure that was present while he took a seat.
“So 1100 credits was the agreed upon price, yes?”
“It was, though if there's anything else you desire outside the monetary value, you need only ask. We can't offer much, but I'm sure I have the ear of someone who can.”
“Hopefully you don't mean that literally,” I jested, putting on a facade of worry.
I could spot Crow watching Martha chuckle at my quip. His miserable expression was almost unreadable, save for the furrowing of the pelts on his brow.
Let him watch me charm his kind as easily as he thinks he can mine.
I raised my tail behind my head while I leaned against the table and curled the end loosely to convey appreciation. It was a sign that was rarely used outside of close bonding - that is to say, it'd been a while since I had been able to use it.
Recognition didn't light up in Martha's expression but I was content with projecting affection in any way I could. Understanding wasn't as important as the gesture itself.
“So might I at least know the names of those who did contribute? I'd like to express my thanks to them.”
Richard was the one who responded, “I wouldn't ask questions I wouldn't want the answers—”
“What he means,” Martha interjected. “Is that most contributors wouldn't like being mentioned by name. Aliens are still a polarizing subject and can crop up arguments that others may be obligated to avoid.”
My ears and tail sagged a bit. “Did my presence bring up that much of a problem?”
“More like it's one of a million other things these people can't agree about. But of those who I think would enjoy a bit of gratitude, you may already know some of them.”
“Oh? Tell me!”
I made eye contact with Crow who remained quiet as he cradled his chin in his palm against the table. His bored demeanor irked me in ways I couldn't describe.
“The Ito family, of whom you're already familiar with their daughter Chihiro, were the first to pledge. They're good folk and will happily accept your thanks. Next was myself, though I didn't give much. One of our cooks, Raksh, also contributed a bit, though that may have been more out of courtesy than anything else. And lastly…”
She lazily extended a claw toward Richard.
“... is Mister Crow here, your biggest donor who paid damn near half of your wage!”
Slowly, I felt myself deflate as enthusiasm made way for disappointment. I gritted my teeth to keep any brash words from escaping my lips.
“Closer to a third, actually,” he corrected her. “And with me already having the contact details of your brother, that means I can help set up the rest of the transaction.”
Even when I think I'm winning, he finds a way to one-up me.
“Would you mind giving us a moment, Vili? I think Mister Crow came here to say something and I’d hate to keep you from saying your goodbyes.”
Obliging her request, Martha and Richard waited patiently as I shuffled out of the tent. I hadn't realized how tightly my paw was clenched before reaching the outside where I felt my joints creak with relief as the fist unballed.
In the short time I'd been away, I secretly began to crave interaction from any of the humans I'd become acquainted with. My mind drifted to the slop that Big Joe always served, and how he always laughed every time I tried to inquire as to his full name. It wasn't quite dinner time, though, and so I then considered if any of the kids were still roaming about for me to tell stories to.
Whispers came from the tent before I could set a destination and my ears immediately perked up. I'd found that the humans’ ears were not nearly as effective as mine and so I found it easy to go unnoticed around them. I assumed they thought I was out of earshot by now.
I crouched on one knee and raised an ear to listen, though it was garbled hisses from this far. Curiosity got the better of me and I shuffled on my knees toward the tent, hiding in the shadow cast by an adjacent tent to mask my presence.
“... playing games with the lives of children,” came the low growl of Crow.
“Miss Ito and my own daughter are both very capable of defending themselves and the children from a venlil, Richard. You need to have faith that things can turn out alright.”
“Faith! She wanted to—”
There was a pause before I heard heavy stomping through the canvas. The mesh flaps that acted as windows were quickly torn shut one by one. I feared Crow would spot me, but he seemed too focused on hiding whatever it was he was talking about.
“She told me that she would've used my brains to add character development to a fucking snowglobe. Faith wouldn't have saved me if she carried through.”
“The fact that she informed you of her plot should be some small comfort that there's a piece of her that trusts you.”
“We don't know how many pieces there are! Should we wait for her to try to gore me on the street a second time? Perhaps you’ll get some insight if she sticks a claw through my eye?”
“I'd never let it come to that. I do wonder why it is that you're so worried about her. Did you not tell me you knew someone in her position?”
I heard a huff leave Richard before he spoke, “That was while she was getting help from professionals! What, do you hope to get her the therapy she needs from some squalid nowhere shantytown when we're eating out of the aliens’ trough ourselves?”
“It's a preferable alternative to leaving her at the mercy of the Federation's methods of ‘healing’. At least this way, she's getting help that matters.”
By this point, their voices had lowered into hissing whispers that even I strained to hear.
“I expect that you'll be more open with the others about your motives in the future, Martha. Maybe I have no rock to stand on when I say this, but your actions could very well draw the UN's eye, and the last thing I want is to have the Blues down here.”
“Is it related to your incarceration? Perhaps you were on parole before the bombing and fear the UN will be after you?”
I listened to rustling coming from my left and the conversation grew quiet. I turned to see Tac trotting along, surprisingly unaccompanied by Mercy as he shoveled a bowl of stew into his maw. He stopped mid-bite to look at me hunched over next to the Blackfoxes’ tent and narrowed his eyes in suspicion.
Shove off, I signaled to him. Come back later.
Weird, he replied before trotting off without fuss, thankfully.
There was something of a release from within the tent as I heard Crow and Blackfox alike exhale.
“I assure you, Richard,” Martha started again. “Whatever fears you have, you're protected by venlil laws of asylum as well as having the backing of myself-”
“We can do therapy later,” Crow butted in. “I'll take Vili home. I hope you're prepared to explain to your son that this mission we've embarked on wasn't the quest for glory he thought it'd be.”
“I've tried my best to tamp his expectations down, but I was hoping that Kanek would be open to publishing our actions. The bus that is taking the ones you rescued into town should be arriving shortly, and Kanek will be here soon after she's shushed them.”
I scampered off when I heard Crow trudge out of the tent, using my paws to crawl as quietly as I could manage out of sight. Blowing dirt off of the scab on my punctured paw, I walked off to find people I wanted to say goodbye to.

Most of the kids were already spending time with their families, but the few who still milled about and played were happy to give one last goodbye. Riley broke down in tears while we embraced and I now had a stain on the fur of my belly where her tears had soaked through.
I tried shifting by a group of the adults that were celebrating their return around a campfire. The looks I got as I did so were unnerving now that I understood the discourse that my presence had caused.
Approaching Crow, I pretended I didn’t know why he was slinking between groups and milling wanderers with a leering eye. He turned about to the sounds of my paws shuffling across the grass and threw his head backwards in a lazy greeting similar to how Mercy would.
“Are you ready to head back home?”
“I'm sure Luka has held the place down on his own… but yes.”
“Good, I'll bring the truck around for you and we'll be on our way.”
“Richa-a-a-a-ard!”
My ears perked up and I snapped my head about to meet the approaching Amber with her arms outstretched. Her voice bounced with each step as she rushed toward the towering Terran. Crow let out a grunt as she forced her arms around his waist and jumped about with glee.
“Mama said you were a party pooper! You told me you'd stay cool!”
“Aw, I'm sure you can forgive me for keeping to myself, Amber. Did you enjoy your time alone?”
Amber turned the corners of her mouth down in a pouty expression. “No, I didn't have anyone to help me with my homework!”
Richard patted the young girl on the back and began trying to pry her arms from him.
“I'm sure you managed just fine, you're smarter than the average second grader. And how did Vili treat you?”
I folded my ears back when Crow's eyes turned back to me.
“Vili? That's Luka!”
Amber finally unlatched herself from Crow and rushed over to my side, jabbing a claw toward me.
“See? The ear is the same color! And she knows when I say her name! Mercy told me venlil don't have boobies like human girls do but she's a girl! You were wrong!”
A couple of the voices closest to us erupted in the familiar, grating laughter that accompanied humans everywhere. I tilted my head while trying to grasp what it was Amber said that had earned such a response. Human and venlil physiology was different for sure, but I'd never considered it so entertaining.
Perhaps it's some in-joke that I'm not knowledgeable on, I thought, humans seem to like those.
Crow lowered his eyes to the ground and pursed his lips before squatting down and beckoning Amber toward him. She obeyed and the taller Terran cupped a hand over her ear, whispering quietly.
Amber's eyes lit up as Crow continued and her mouth hung agape. “Lu- ah, er…you're a twin?!”
In a rush, Amber grasped the fur around my ribs and began shaking me back and forth. “You were hiding it from me-e-e!”
Given this small child was still two-thirds my weight, I wobbled like a sapling in the wind as I tried to grab for the scolding child's wrists.
“Please. Stop. Gonna hurl.”
The little girl groaned and buried her face in my stomach. “You must think I'm pretty stupid too, huh?”
Mustering as much of my understanding of English, I belched out, “No.”
Amber buried her face deeper into my pelt while exhaling.
“l'ou… no donb.”
She raised her head to look me head-on, something which I couldn't return in full for the placement of my eyes.
“I'ou's… Zm’rd. Kappy. Ngai'z.”
“You stink at English,” Amber giggled while shooting me one last face-splitting snarl. I mashed her cheeks between my paws and she relented her grasp.
“I neeb go, fr'nd! O’gee?”
“Okay! I promise I'll try to know how to say ‘hi’ next time! And more.”
Richard butted in, “I'm sure she'll hold you to that promise, but I think it's time we got going.”
As soon as he had suggested as much, I caught sight of a human who was only covered in pelts from the waist down stagger into view. The glassy eyed stare and uncoordinated movement were all too familiar to me even without knowing where they were before.
They growled, “Fucks the alien still doing here?”
“Just about to get going, Paul,” Richard shot back. “Don't concern yourself with her.”
“It has been here long enough! Move along, little lambchop!”
“Man, lay off,” another human intervened. “She's as welcome here as any other guest.”
“Nah, Paul has a point. How do we know she ain't some Baby Burner spy or some shit? Get the xeno outta here!”
The humans quickly began bickering amongst themselves and I felt the firm grasp of Crow on my shoulder tug me away from the commotion. Amber trailed behind, watching the debates unfold behind us while we made our way along.
Crow opened the door in a raggedy truck in even worse condition than the others, standing aside for me to enter. While I didn't want to test the predator's patience in light of the tension behind us, I whirled about to give Amber one last goodbye hug. Her grasp around my neck was like iron though the wet streams on her face were all I needed to know that I should let her have this.
“You're gonna come back, right? You and your brother are gonna come and say hi?”
I saw no point in trying to cobble together an articulate sentence in her own language that'd fall flat as soon as I spoke. I considered my words carefully while I clasped her hands in my paws.
“I want to, but I have class that I need to catch up with, as well as I'm in need of a stable job once I'm through with this one. I don't know when I'll be back, but I want you to know that you've made this the best two weeks I've had in a long time, Amber. I don't know how much of my language you understand, but your enthusiasm has surpassed all barriers.”
She stared back up at me with her lips locked in an “oh” pose before turning to Richard who still watched with a lazy gaze.
“She said ‘maybe’.”
That seemed to suffice for Amber as she broke free and ran off squealing with her arms in the air as she always did when she was excited. I'd gotten used to the ear-splitting shrieks of the kids, and my ears didn't even fold back on reflex anymore.
“That's not what I said,” I grumbled to Crow.
He clicked his tongue as he held the door open for me. “Less is more. She's a kid, so she may not fully grasp your struggles anyway.”
With a huff, I crawled into the truck and kicked my feet up onto the dashboard while Crow ducked in behind the wheel. He twisted the key and the vehicle gurgled to life.
Strangely enough, I found that instead of the truck lurching forward, Crow put the vehicle into reverse, using the mirror to navigate up the hill. The truck seemed to make sure we felt every rock and bump that it struck, and I eventually decided to straighten out my posture so that I didn't get folded in half by a particularly bad bump.
Richard seemed unfazed by the sickness-inducing commotion, guiding the truck up the hill with a steady gaze. Stopping at the top, he whipped out his holopad and tapped away while quietly mumbling to himself.
“... hundred-fifty year-old country shit, sure why not.”
He tapped once more and the truck's audio system whirred with the melodic twang of a stringed instrument accompanied by simple percussion. A human's strange croon came over the speaker in a curious tune.
“You held me up, held me down
Made me crazy, then turned me around…”
Richard twisted the knob to bring the volume down to a more agreeable level and I caught a glimpse down at the camp. A group of humans were now gathered where I'd been talking with Amber just moments before.
Now, I could spot the human Paul bumping chests with a human much larger than he, noses almost touching in a clear display of aggression as they howled at each other. Humans pointed claws at one another and argued while yet more flocked to the scene of the commotion. Whether their motives were to disperse or exacerbate was yet to be seen.
“You were my shelter and my storm
Made me cold, then you made me warm…”
Crow finally put the truck in gear and we rolled backwards yet again, leaving the only sight before me the peaks of the Belimal retreating beneath the grassy brow.
As I let the truck shuttle me back to my brother, I yearned for the comfort of my own bed and blankets, for the soft hum of my own air conditioning unit, and for the obnoxious snoring and sleep-talking of my own flesh and blood.
From here, one might even be able to see the highest of the foothills from which my roots would lay betwixt, a reminder that the pangs of home weren't just knots in my stomach. Luka and I had a long way to go to get away from home, and even longer to be rid of it.
“One step forward and two steps back, nobody gets too far like that
One step forward and two steps back, this kind of dance can never last.”
[ First / Previous ]

Long post incoming:
So our house is just under 1200 sqft and we have two types of vinyl plank flooring throughout (the first kind was discontinued before we did our remodel for our bedroom/bath). I just use our stick vacuum to get all the crumbs and garbage up (we have a 20-month old toddler so there’s usually quite a bit and I don’t have a whole lot of time to clean) and I use just the basic O-cedar mop and bucket system. I bought it a few years ago to help with ACTUALLY cleaning AND sanitizing our floors since the cheapo sponge mop we had wasn’t doing squat and it was ✨all the rage✨ at the time.
The cleaning solution I use for one half of the house is just white vinegar and warm water but the newer floors are the better quality luxury vinyl plank and it says to only use ph neutral cleaner on it so I just use Odoban for that which we hate the smell of and it leaves a lot of residue on the cheaper flooring when I use just that which is why I use either one on each half of the house.
The thing is is that the O-Cedar mop doesn’t seem to be getting everything up(I scrub the crap out of the floors too) and I often have to go over the floors again a second time and the water is almost clear but I can take a baby wipe and rub the floors and dirt will come up. I also have some pretty severe sciatic nerve issues and mopping really aggravates it to the point my husband almost has to carry me to bed by the end of the day on the days I mop because of the pain (I’m 22 btw). Another reason why I mop every month or so.
I’ve been trying to find an end all be all cleaning solution for the entire house that gets up grime and sanitizes since we also have a mild German cockroach infestation we’re trying to eliminate. I’ve heard of using isopropyl alcohol but I’m afraid of it damaging the floors.
I’ve also been looking into getting a vacuum/mop combo and if we’re gonna be throwing a good chunk of money at one we want to make sure it’s not a glorified piece of crap.
So are there any suggestions for a good cleaning solution or good vacuum mops?

I 24f am 2 years into what we originally thought was musculoskeletal damage from multiple accidents and child birth, but we are now thinking this is auto immune.
Symptoms:
Head: migraines, oral ulcers (red with white edges sometimes circular sometimes oblong), excessive hair shedding with out hairless patches
Face: butterfly like rash occurring after sun or heat exposure (is rapid onset after 5 minutes of exposure, will gradually reduce then flairs hours after being inside and cooled down to bright red, burning, itching)
Abdomen/chest: IBS like symptoms, pleurisy, pain in right and left lower ribs felt front to back, heart palpitations, high heart rate (resting 100-110 flares 120-160), stage 3 endometriosis
Skin: discoid type rash (occurs on neck, lips, eyelids, chest, and elbows and is red, mostly flat, scaley, flaking, and occasionally blisters or cracks), sun sensitivity(not always visually inflamed but results in burning and itching lasting days after exposure)
Muscular: muscle spasms, muscle pain non localized with worsening trigger points (worst in neck/upper back, and low back but occurs every where), muscles easily banding/knotting with difficulty releasing
Skeletal: joint pain and inflammation (primarily hips and knees but occasionally in shoulders, wrists, fingers, ankles, and toes), arthritis right hip, deep bone pain
Nervous: occasional numbness/tingling in fingers and forearms, sciatic nerve pain in both legs, occasional shaking hands, during childhood and teen years never had a temperature taken below 99°F (has lowered with age), hot/cold flashes, night sweats
No DR has put all of the symptoms together until recently. Not putting it together has led to IBS, DDD, eczema, TMJ, and other diagnoses. I saw pain management last tuesday for my musculaskeletal pain and he brought up fibromyalgia, gave trigger point injections (didn't help), and prescribed tizanidine (also didn't help). I woke up with the start of my usual rash and felt like i had just woken up the day after a surgery so i called my PM they were closed. Called my primary and she sent me to their priority care to have me seen by atleast someone. The priority care DR brought up lupus and said she doubt's this is fibro, ran a auto immune/ inflammation panel, prescribed Medrol (tapering pulse doses), and gave adequate pain management.
The panel ran included an ANA panel, RH factor, CRP, and cyclic citrul peptide. All of which came back negative. Previous blood tests have been a bit all over the place nothing often going too high or low. Most recently a GFR estimate came back low a week prior to other testing but other levels were with in normal ranges.
We have previously tried medications such as gabapentin, lyrica, LDN, duloxetine, robaxin, flexeril, tramadol, various NSAIDs, epidural steroid injections, lidocaine creams, etc. None of which worked, and i would need a combination of ibuprofen, robaxin, and hydrocodone to even take the edge off of daily pain. The steroid is working though, and i haven't had to supplement it much with pain meds. I havent had this level of relief since I was 16. It has improved all aspects of my symptoms. While i still have aches, a rash, and various other symptoms they are atleast tolerable. Where i used to need all of my rescue pain meds to even get out of bed, three days into the steroid, i only find my self needing them at night.
I am very confused as to where to go from here because my symptoms don't match my blood work. I see my primary wednesday and she has already said in advance she will be sending me to a rheumatologist. These referals usually take about a month until im seen so i don't know how to ask her for help managing until then or what to even ask to try at this point. She doesn't want to prescribe opiates any more because of how often id need them previously because nothing else would help. Im open to trying anything but am worried we will be very limited because my blood work doesn't show anything. Im scared once im done with this steroid the symptoms will return and i will be left completely unable to function again. I also don't even know which direction to push testing any more when i do see the rheumatologist and am afraid everything is going to be dismissed because of my blood work. To me, this seems autoimmune but im not a doctor so i dont know for sure if this is the real thing or just a coincidence of collective symptoms. I feel like we are so close to having a break through but yet still light years away. Any one in a similar situation or already on the other side?

Lately, I have exclusively been playing River + Forest embarks, mostly in search of waterfalls. I primarily embark on Untamed Wilds tiles, as I thoroughly enjoy the chaos and interesting creatures they bring. This inevitably has led me to many failed water physics experiments, bringing new ideas for efficiently optimizing the use of water in a fort.
Through this, I have crafted what I believe to be the ideal Dwarven River Hillocks design... one giant water turbine.
Dwarven Turbine Hillocks
These images are from my current fort, so for floors like "Utilities" and both "Services" floors can be laid out in any number of ways, depending on what your goals are. I borrowed the Farming Silo design from Urist's Startup Guide.
The general idea is this:

1. large 33x33 (3 tile wide), -2z circular moat that acts as both a canal and reservoir
2. ingest piping from infinite water source to moat
3. utility hub inside of moat area (for centralized routing of mechanisms)
4. drainage piping from moat to rivemap edge

Outside of this, everything else can be changed.
A few key factors:

• diverting infinite water sources will always cause increased load to the system
  • I try to counteract this by determining which water body will be most affected by the diversion, then redirect my drainage to it
  • since flow + pressure aren't tied to water bodies, I drain as much water as possible back to the "natural system" to keep it as close as possible to 7/7 depth, and counteract the increased FPS load of updating a large number of water tiles
• from the Wiki, "Trying to move natural flow up or down to a different z-level may have unpredictable results... Water falling to a lower z-level almost never becomes naturally flowing."
  • I don't think I can remember any fort where this design didn't lead to naturally flowing water, I'm unsure of exactly how this interaction plays out...
  • there's a sort of "sweet spot" to managing the ingest : drainage ratio, which is why I sometimes implement bridges at the ingest/drain points that essentially "cut" the pressure, forcing the 1 tile of water through 2 diagonal pathways and slowing the overall "flow"
  • it seems like the further you place the channel to the moat from the river ingest piping, the less you are increasing the "pressure" from dropping z-levels into the moat, thereby avoiding overfilling

I'm curious to see what ideas the community has around this design and finding improvements to effectiveness/efficiency that I inevitably missed.
Help improve this design!
Edit: Diagrams regarding water flow + civilian traffic

I passed. Passing on some lessons learned throughout the preparation.
Before I decided to take the CAPM, I obtained PSM1 a month ago, and before that, I took the CSM training. After PSM1, I explored more of my options, as it was already in my plan at the start of this year to add some skills to my profile. I was originally going into product management and bought a Udemy course months before familiarizing myself with the basics, but Scrum itself has fascinated me. That led me to discover the CAPM. The studying took me about 4 weeks.
I started studying a few days after I passed my PSM1. The studying took me about 4 weeks.
Here are the resources I’ve used:
FIRST WEEK
1: I printed the PMBOK Guide 7th Edition - I got this for free through a random search on Google. I didn’t much read all throughout it, just scanned it.
2: I Bought Joshua Phillips’ CAPM Prep Exam via Udemy, which I wasn’t able to maintain attention, his teaching style wasn’t sticking out to me. I got the course on sale at 12 USD
SECOND WEEK
I started memorizing the formulas during this time, as I’m not the best buddies with any sort of calculations. During work breaks, I searched some EVM quizzes and solved them but I think my maximum every day was 5 questions and my brain was done. I fell into a habit of writing the formulas twice or thrice a day on my small whiteboard and erasing them again to only write them again for three weeks and that made me memorize them in no time.
3: Decided to buy Andrew Ramayal’s CAPM Prep course and finished it, that’s how I got the hours needed to qualify for the CAPM exam. This dude is amazing, he’s engaging, however, I skipped some Agile sections as I was already solid in that area. I got the course on sale at 12 USD
4: Installed PocketPrep, in which the free version was the only one I utilized. I scored 81% on my last quick quiz.
THIRD WEEK
5: I purchased Peter Landini’s CAPM Mock Exams Kindle version via Amazon for 10 USD. Contrary to what most say, I wouldn’t say it’s the closest to the exam, but its style of delivering the question is somewhat similar. I started taking its Kindle version and practicing my mock exams there. First, I take 50 questions from Set 1, Set 2, Set 3. By the end of the third 5week, I started doing the 150 mock exams per day. The last exam I recorded was 123/150 82%
FOURTH WEEK
6: I read a lot of things here about the exam that were heavy on Business analysis, and I was genuinely at a loss in this area. I bought The BA Guide Business Analysis Modeling Skills & Techniques via Udemy, which Jeremy Aschenbrenner did a great foundation on the topic. I would like to note though that it’s not as comprehensive as I thought it would be, but it was a great addition to my learning materials.
I created a Google Slide where I put most of the diagrams expected from the BA section.
I’ve utilized YouTube for most off-course reviews:
EVM Formula
Critical Path Method
Critical Path Method and Dependencies
Ricardo Vargas PMBOK Guide 7th Edition in 10 Minutes
David Mclachlan’s 150 PMP Questions
For the record, I didn’t get ITTO’s questions, I didn’t get much BA questions. My exam was heavy on PM Fundamentals and Core Concepts. EVM formulas are 6-9 questions but some you can calculate mentally. I got questions I didn’t originally study, like DDSM stuff. Read the 7th Guide! I also personally think that AR TIA Exams are closest to the exam. A mixture of Landini and AR TIA.
I took it to a testing center. Arrived there an hour early, they did a rigorous check-up on me, making sure I didn’t have mobile devices attached, a watch, earphones. They’ll give you a folder white board and a marker, and the calculator is within the computer. I got 70 minutes left when I finished the exam, I flagged almost 20 questions combined from set 1 and set 2.
I was surprised I got Above Target with BA, because that’s the part where I was really missing a lot, and I was even more surprised I got Needs Improvement with Fundamentals and Core Concepts. The Predictive and Agile Frameworks were also Above Target.
I was hungry by the time I got out of the exam room, and now I’m suffering from a headache writing this down, but I’m glad it’s over!
I think I’ll do more reading with the fundamentals, man, the questions are tricky as hell. I’m planning to take the PMP a few months later, I’m going to rest my brain out from these months studying for CSM to PSM to CAPM.
I hope we all make it!

Ah! A new week a new chapter. Here's to hoping that everyone had a good a weekend. I did.
[Previous] [First] [Next] [RoyalRoad] [Discord] —----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Eri blinked as her eyes adjusted to the light level. The hallway she found herself in slowly brightened with the glow of magical lights, revealing raw stone walls and floor.
“This is the entrance,” Felix said from her right.
Before she could respond, Kyrith’s head appeared above them, prompting the two of them to make room. The dragon’s body materialized as they cleared the area.
“Oh! This is dense!” He said, his body shivering slightly.
Felix had brought them to the Sanctuary, as he called it. Eri was curious about it and she apparently had some questions…
“It is. Be careful, it affected Zira quite a bit our first time here.” Felix responded, gesturing for the two of them to follow.
The entrance led directly into a hallway. It was a tight fit for Kyrith, but thankfully it didn’t cause any issues.
“Fea made this?” Eri asked, sounding a little incredulous. She was in the middle with her partner behind her.
“Yeah. But this,” he gestured, “Isn’t what is impressive. Just wait, we’re almost there.”
“Right…” She muttered, still unsure how to take all this. The dense mana didn’t help. It wasn’t exactly stifling, but it left her feeling uncomfortable.
They continued their trek, passing several rooms. Her curiosity had her peeking in one as they passed, but there wasn’t anything of interest.
Suddenly, they came to a stop. In front of them was a solid wall.
Eri tried to speak, “Where–”
Felix simply placed his hand onto the wall. A moment later, the wall opened up…
“Here we are,” Felix said with a nod.
Her jaw dropped, Kyrith gasped.
Before them was a massive cave…
Daylight shown down onto the floor, coming from the equally impressive opening above them. The circular shape of the cave held rows upon rows, levels upon levels, of what was unmistakably dens made for dragons.
How…?
Ramps led up to platforms, those platforms made up the various levels. She was struggling to comprehend the scale of what she was seeing.
T-this is truly a sanctuary.
“I told you it was impressive,” Felix commented with a chuckle. “You can go in– But! Stick to either the first floor or the ground. The rest aren’t finished…”
Eri gulped and stepped past. The sheer scale, the sheer size of…everything was awe-inspiring.
“F-Fea did this?” she asked again, this time with wonderment.
“She did… But she wasn’t able to finish it,” he answered. There was a bittersweet tone to his voice, as if recalling a memory.
Enough room was created for Kyrith to make it past them. “Wow, this place is huge!” He swung his head around. “Do you think we can finish it?! This would be a great place for us to call home!”
Felix smiled. “That’s actually why I brought you two here–”
Kyrith’s attention was already pulled away. He started moving, going deeper into the cavernous space…
“You want to finish this?” Eri asked, still shocked and not quite noticing her partner wandering off.
“I do, but there’s no way I could do so on my own. I wanted your advice and opinion…” He trailed off awkwardly.
“I… I doubt there is anything I could do to help. Something like this would require miners, at least.”
Letting out a sigh, Felix walked forward a few feet before stopping. “Yeah, I kinda figured that… But, what about in Bernel? Could they have someone who could help?”
The village? No way. “Doubtful… You’d need the dwarves, or possibly the gnomes. Either one would have experience in something like this. Us elves mainly stick to logging, or above ground mining. This would be too much for us.”
Eri frowned as she continued. “Unfortunately, getting one of those races to help might prove to be a challenge… They aren’t very keen on your presence.”
“That’s what I was afraid of. Seeing how neither one of their sages wanted to help with recruiting…” Felix said, the dejection written plain upon his face.
She winced at his sight. “It’s a delicate situation. Neither race is very trusting, especially of a human… I do think we can start to win them over, however. With the eggs hatching soon, it might be enough to prove your intentions to them.”
“So what am I supposed to do? Drag four newly hatched dragons and their partners all the way to them?” He asked, letting his frustration through.
“Felix–”
“No, I’m sorry.” He said, shaking his head. “I’m just mad at the situation, I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”
There was a pause before he continued. “Luckily, I did sort of foresee something like that being an issue. For now, I think the Sanctuary will have to wait and I will have to go with my second idea.”
She approached Felix, “What is your idea?”
“I was thinking of building either an extension to the hatchery, or a separate building. Some sort of dormitory for both dragons and their partners to stay in. We’re going to run out of living space rather quickly.” Felix answered with a slight shrug.
“Now that is something I think us elves could help with,” she said with encouragement.
“Really?”
Eri nodded. “Still, it might be a tough sell. But nowhere near as bad as trying to convince the dwarves or gnomes. I think if we go straight to Chief Yorlen, we might be able to convince him. If he spreads the word, we might be able to get some of the tribes to pitch in.”
Felix perked up. “Right, I don’t think I left a bad impression. Most seemed to just accept me being there during the celebrations. Or at the very least, I wasn’t ran out of the village.”
With a slight laugh, Eri nodded. “That’s true. But we shouldn’t get our hopes up just yet. I think we have a good chance, but he’ll expect something out of it in return. We should think–”
She blinked and looked around, only now did she realize Kyrith wasn’t with them.
Eri, come over here! There’s even more eggs!
Eri froze in place, not quite sure what she just heard her partner say. I’m sorry, did you say you found more eggs? Like, dragon eggs?
Yep!
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Zira grumbled internally. While Felix took Eri and Kyrith into the Sanctuary, she was stuck back at the manor. Before her were the four other elves, all looking unsure as she stared down at them.
“Do you have any questions?” She asked, feeling a mixture of awkwardness and frustration.
The elves looked between each other before Yedril slowly raised his hand.
“Yes?”
“What is it like being bonded to Felix? I mean, do you and him have arguments–”
Zira let out a deep rumble in the form of a laugh. “Of course we have our arguments. We even had some fights.”
“Really?” Yedril asked, looking a little surprised. “That’s… How does that affect the bond? I would’ve thought arguing would hurt it.”
This is going to take a while, she realized, laying down to get more comfortable. “I can only speak for me and Felix, but our bond is quite strong. Felix said it before, you have to be able to trust your partner.
“Even though we’ve had our arguments and fights, it’s always been from a position of caring for one another… We just have our differences on what that looks like. We’ve been improving, however. And don’t forget, trust goes both ways.”
“I think I get it…” Yedril muttered, staring off into the distance.
Zira watched him for a moment before speaking up again. “Any more questions?”
Lorem was next and he suddenly looked determined. “How would a bond affect my relationship with Noria? It is no secret I am courting her and I worry how that would affect my soon-to-be partner.”
Noria went rigid, blushing a scarlet red. Solanna cocked an eyebrow, while her brother blinked in confusion as he came back to reality. However, Zira grew quiet…
It’s obvious why he is asking me, but what to say? She considered her words carefully, very carefully. “Relationships…will be tricky. Perhaps because the two of you have been courting before hatching your eggs, it won’t be an issue. I would still explain it to both as best you can.”
Lorem nodded. “When do you think it would be best to talk with them?”
When indeed…? “I honestly don’t know, but perhaps once they start asking questions. Learn from mine and Felix’s mistake on this, don’t wait.”
“Mistake?” Noria asked aloud, before realizing what she meant. “I-I’m sorry–”
Zira sighed, sounding more like a growl. Poor Noria looked as if she was about to faint.
Maybe it’s for the best that I get this out of the way. If they can learn from us, then… “I doubt it will surprise any of you, but Felix is courting Eri. Though, both seem to be doing the smart thing and taking it slow.
“Anyway, when I was freshly hatched, I did not understand what romance was. Nor did I understand why Felix would ever love someone other than me. It…led to a lot of confusion for me. We got through it, and now I understand.” Even if I still have feelings on that topic.
“I-I see…” Noria said after a few moments. She still looked a little shaky on her feet.
Solanna was the next one to speak up. “Do you have any advice on how to best care for them?” She spoke with indifference but as Zira turned her attention to the elf, she could see a burning curiosity hiding behind her eyes.
“Attention, they will want a lot of it,” Zira smiled. “Be prepared to be made a pillow, or have them pull your laundry out and sleep on that. Kyrith was notorious for that one…
“But as for any special care to consider? Besides building trust between, work together as often as you can. They will come to appreciate that.”
“What is up with Felix being made your pillow anyway?” Yedril asked with an amused expression.
She let out a rumbling laugh. “Punishment– At least, at first. Now, it is more of a ritual.”
“Punishment?”
She shook her head. “I’ve told you, we’ve had our fair share of arguments. Who do you think won most of them? And who do you think lost most of them?”
Yedril chuckled. “I understand, but now I’m curious. Are you worried about crushing him?”
“Not really, we can tell when each other is in pain. I never drift off into sleep until I know he’s comfortable.”
Oh, I should probably tell them about that. “One more thing about bonding– Actually, I’m surprised neither me nor Felix has brought this up until now…”
Zira waited until she had everyone’s attention. “Once you and your partner grow more confident with each other, there is something quite special the two of you will be able to do. You will be able to combine your minds together.”
“What do you mean?” Solanna asked, but the question was written on all their faces.
“Exactly that. Felix likes to call it melding, but the term doesn’t matter. What matters is that you and your partner will become one. Two bodies, but only one mind.”
Noria’s eyes widened. “Wait…” she trailed off, unable to finish her sentence.
Zira gave her a curious expression. “I know that is a bit of a shock, I apologize for not bringing it up sooner. The concept is…hard to explain though, and should not be tried until you have solidified trust between the two of you.”
The small elf shook her head, pulling herself out of her stupor. However, it was Yedril who asked the next question. “What is it like?”
She thought for a moment. “Hmm, I think the easiest way to explain it is like this: You lose the concept of ‘I,’ and gain an understanding of ‘us.’ There is no you or me, only we.”
The four elves pondered her words. Meanwhile, a distant noise from the hatchery caught Zira’s attention. A moment later, she heard Felix.
We might have figured something out…
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Watcher kneeled, closing his eyes in prayer to the empty eggs that stood before him.
He had been listening, he had been guided and given instructions. Now, the fruits of his labor were beginning to show. There was still more to do, however…
Master! Guide Watcher– Guide me! Hear Watcher’s prayers, show Watcher next step! Eggs hatch soon, Watcher use power… I bring elf and egg together, like Master want! Please, old Master… Please, answer Watcher calls!
His pleas grew silent, he hadn’t heard her voice since the eggs imprinted. Now, he was growing desperate. Watcher feared he had somehow angered her…
A calm wind blew through him. With it, a soft melodic voice hummed and tempered his nerves. A soothing hand landed upon the top of his head, gently petting it.
Shh, Watcher has done well, the wind answered. I had given you all my available power and had to rest. But now? Now, I feel it. I feel them stirring. Soon, Watcher… Very soon, I will be able to provide you with more.
Watcher felt the tension leave his body. What of New Master? Will Old Master help?
He felt the melodic wind once again. Of course, we will need his help just as much as he will need mine.
The hand slid down to the side of his snout, visions flashed in his mind.
A shadow reveals the folly of revenge.
An ancient evil moves, guiding a blind man.
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So we have Eri and Kyrith learning about and seeing the sanctuary. Zira playing the adult and answering some hard questions. And finally, things happening with Watcher... Ultimately, things are happening.
Anyway, I hope everyone enjoyed the chapter.