No problem stopping cymbalta

Scouting at Magic: The Gathering Tournaments

2019.04.22 22:54 jugglervr Scouting at Magic: The Gathering Tournaments

Since scouting is allowable, let's talk about the best ways to scout (and the ethics associated with such)
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2022.06.03 14:38 huggothebear Mushrooms4Coldsores

A subreddit to talk about and share experiences trying to use BETA-GLUCANS / POLYSACCHARIDES to control oral herpes / HSV-1. I run this sub alone, for free, to help others. If you have been helped, and want to give back and support my efforts, you could donate some cryptocurrency; it would be appreciated, and is certainly not required! : ) BTC: bc1qxnaacgfult4u62axtavl87vtwm7v52w6qryek8 ETH: 0xA2fF293C84232306A1a50374977799c6dc7c92D9 SAVE 15% on TIMEHEALTH code: ”mushrooms4coldsores15”
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2019.07.21 09:03 Scott Army

All hail scott
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2024.05.19 11:18 PowerMinute1922 The Man who screams at Daybreak

My last flat was unbearable.
I mean, you try having a family of 11 live above you, when half of them are under the age of 8. Also try having a pair of raging alcoholic neighbours on either side of you. A pair who were once married to each other. My eyes rivalled that of pigeons’ due to no sleep.
I lasted a total of 21 days. I know, new record huh? I just about shoved the keys back in the grubby hands of my landlord when I finally saw the lunacy inscribed on his face. No wonder the rent was dirt cheap.
So I was back on the road, not on the streets though. Luckily enough I started questioning the flat by day 8, looked around for another place by day 15, and made a decision to get the hell out on day 18. 3 days of packing and it was bye-bye.
My new place seemed all the better too: yes, the rent was more expensive, and yes, it only has 2 bedrooms. But at least it was a house, one where pesky neighbours were at least 5 metres away. On my right, at least. On my left? Their house - thankfully - couldn’t even be seen where I stood.
Parking my car, I skipped up towards my new house with my fresh set of keys. And on entering? Silence. Perfect still silence. Thank the Lord. I basked in it for a while before returning to my car, unloading some of my baggage. It took 3-4 hauls, but I managed to fit it into one of the bedrooms. Thankfully, the rest of my things were to be brought by moving vans in about an hour.
I envisioned what the house could look like with a few finishing touches.
“But first…”
I eyed the 2 rooms. “Mine!”
The room I had chosen to be mine gave a bright view of my own smaller garden, as well as a portion of my right neighbour’s house, but that didn’t matter much. The view in the other room would suck: just my car and some reeds.
I was just about done heaving some of my baggage into my newly-chosen room when the doorbell gave an obnoxious ring. I stood, fighting the urge to just run away into one of my rooms when it beeped again.
Reaching the door, I eyed out of the peephole to see nothing but an opaque whiteness. I guess the downside in this house is that the last tenant was a slob. I eyed some of the yellowing walls. Sighing, I opened the door.
“Hello! We’re your neighbours, Jack and Sally, and we live just there,” She motioned towards my right, “We came to introduce ourselves, and to let you know that if you ever need anything, we’re right here.”
She then shoved a basket full of biscuits at my chest, a motherly-smile stretched around her lips. She turned to leave, husband - clearly forced to follow her - in tow, when she turned around.
“Your name, dear?”
“Leen!” I shouted after her.
“Perfect.”
And perfect it was, I thought. Neighbours that respect their distance from you, and give you food? I eyed the delicious snacks in front of me. Definitely an upgrade.
Though it was at dawn the very next day that I woke up, shook.
~
See, I was just sleeping in my newly delivered bed when I heard it. Something that sounded like a bird, a huge caw, before it alternated into different pitches. Disoriented, I tried to wipe the sleep from my eyes in order to focus better. But it just made me more confused.
It sounded like a chicken.
As far as I know, this new place was not the countryside, nor farmland. So what? And why?
I stepped up to my window to take a good look outside. I wouldn’t keep a rooster in my home that’s for sure. Whatever it was, it was coming from…
My jaw dropped.
I closed my eyes and scrubbed at them harshly.
Please tell me why I opened my eyes and saw the exact same thing.
A man, on his haunches, face pointed towards the sky, was making rooster noises.
And he was on my neighbours’ garden. The ones I met earlier.
He looked absolutely demented. I wasn’t even scared then, just flabbergasted. I wasted no time calling the police at this disturbing nuisance.
When they arrived though, I saw my neighbours’ shoot straight from their house, speaking or…was it pleading? With the officers. What on Earth..?
Anyway, it was their problem now, so I went back to bed. I had a whole bunch of chores the next day, and had to get it all sorted before I returned to work.
Shutting my eyes, I wished for peace. And quiet, thank you very much.
~
At last, I woke up at 10 AM. By 1 PM, I had sorted my clothing into its respective drawers, and had decorated my bedroom walls, including a new golden addition. And now? I had food cooking on the stove. It felt satisfying, having cleaned up and now awaiting the prize of food.
I scrolled on my phone as I waited for the pasta to cook, before another ding turned my attention towards the door.
“Huh, what now?”
Unfortunately I hadn’t cleaned the peephole yet, so I had to open the door. There stood Jack and Sally. Or Sally and Jack. Jack looked lost. Sally stared deep into my eyes.
“Was it you?”
“Me? What do you mean?”
“That called the police last night?”
I recalled the past night, and gave her a thumbs up, hoping my smile was reassuring. “Yep, don’t worry, that lunatic will not be coming back ever again. He can go to the zoo if he wants to squawk.”
I should’ve taken the cue from Jack’s paling face, but Sally grabbed hold of me. “Listen here, okay? That man, the one you called the police on...” She trembled, “He’s my son! You can’t do that! He was not even on your property!”
My eyes widened. “He’s…your son?”
“Of course! How can you not see that?”
Nodding at her, I relinquished myself from the hold she had on my arms. “Okay then, sorry for the call. But I do have to mention something,” Jack started to shake his head behind his wife, but I ignored the little-to-say man, “Is there any way you can keep the noise down to a minimum? Honestly, your son has vocal cords of steel! It would wake the entire neighbourhood at this rate.”
Sally stared pointedly at me, then took a look around my house. “Very well.”
She grabbed her husband’s arm as she turned to leave, and I caught the slightest look of fear in his eyes before he was abruptly pulled away.
I dismissed it - and the sinking feeling - on discovering my very soft, overcooked pasta when I came back into my home though.
I managed to also do one thing before wrapping up: I cleaned out my door's peephole. Now I wouldn't have to open the door to know it's them. I'd just speak at them from the inside if they were to come back.
~
I woke, jolting out of my bed the very next morning, or night. I checked my bedside clock to see it was 3:50 AM. The cock-a-doodle-doo was breaking into my head. I grasped my hair in frustration, knowing that I didn’t have the madman’s parents phone numbers’ to call, or maybe scream at them. It was the exact same thing as the day before! Except…maybe…
I strained my ear.
It sounded a lot closer.
My hands, for some reason, became clammy instantly, and the urgent thumping of my own heart - the fragility of my own life - became all the more prominent.
I tiptoed to my window and peeked outside. Nothing.
I then slowly treaded to my spare bedroom, and pulled the curtains apart. Zilch. Nada. Though…
Almost as if under a spell, my head turned towards my main door. I…I could somehow feel it. Just to confirm though, I peeked out of the door-hole.
And with a slam, I collapsed in my new, dream home.
~
When I came to, I was lying on white sheets, and a bright white light hung over me.
A hospital.
I was in my own room, which I found odd. It was not like I needed it. But then a doctor walked in, followed by 3 other people, and it all made sense. Everything - blurs and sureness - melted into a perfect picture.
Sally, Jack, and their son.
He couldn’t be more than 17 really. Though he looked 37 a few hours ago. Face pressed against the glass of my peephole, mouth wide open towards it, eyes pointing in different directions as his face reddened and contorted.
I was deaf in one moment. Then came the COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO.
Of course I fainted. Who could blame me?
“Good afternoon, I’m Dr Lam. You’re in A&E right now. Are you able to tell me your full name and date of birth?
My voice answered the Doctor’s questions, but my eyes stared dazed at the youngster’s abdomen, not daring to reach his its eyes.
“Well, nothing seems to be wrong with you. You may have just been dehydrated. Did you have any headache or pain before you fainted?”
I replied in the negative.
“Luckily, your friends’ son had found you passed out, and ensured your speedy arrival to hospital, so I wouldn’t be worried about any damage.”
My eyes finally strayed, looking towards the ground. I held the nauseousness of bile down my throat. Following a brief check-up, I was allowed to leave.
And 2 people and a demon followed me out.
“Well, Leen, that should give you a lesson,”
Sally.
I turned towards the family, who stood in a 3 person arc. Only 1 managed to look away, equal parts shame and guilt. I don’t need to mention who that was.
“Don’t worry. You can look at me, I don’t bite: not now and not at dawn,” a strained voice whispered at me. “I promise, it’s only at dawn when I…when I…”
“Hush Dean, don’t work your voice that much. You’ll need to save it for later.”
I was still dizzy. That didn’t stop me from running half-hobbled to the taxi stand, where I begged and claimed to many that I would provide double payment if they were to take me to my house.
It took a while, but I managed to pack some of my clothes. There was no way in hell I was sleeping at that damned house again, not now, not ever. I called and booked at a nearby hotel in the meantime.
I was done packing necessities by the evening. Walking out of my house, I saw no sign of those three. I would have been relieved, had I not come face to face with than one thing: standing in my garden, leaning against my car. My breathing picked up instantly.
Dean
It stood with its back resting against my car. And It noticed me immediately. Seems like it was just waiting for me to notice it.
“Are you leaving?” It sounded almost sad, but I needed it to move away, or my only way out of there would be in jeopardy.
“For the night.” My answer? Almost smooth, but even I could hear the first shake in my voice.
It nodded though. “Okay.” And he moved from my car. I counted the distance. 1 metre. 2. 2.5-
It made a sudden dash at me as I - in flight response - ran frantically to the driver’s seat, locking the door. I came in half-squashed, my backpack still on my back. But I didn’t care.
Its face was pressed against the window.
“Mum is waiting for a person that will like me for me, not run away. You’re supposed to like me.” It said, matter-of-factly. It then wailed, and sunk beneath the car window.
I did not dare to sit up and see what it was doing.
I didn’t even need to though. The sound came a split-second later.
COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO
Tears spilled from my eyes. My limbs felt weak. I couldn’t even breathe. It suddenly sprang up to the window. Eyes enlarged: looking at me and everywhere at once.
“I can actually tur-COCK- in the day too, but M-DOODLE- said it would be too much for you,” wheezing, it exclaimed again before adding, “but this is ME. Do you-do you, do you like me?”
With dead limbs I weighed my foot on the pedal, and jump-started the car to speed off. My head shook left-and-right in response, stomach heaving with nausea.
Human preservation kicked me into taking proper control of the car when I saw, out of the rear view mirror, Sally. This time with a rope, which locked around the creature’s neck before she tugged, drawing it into her house. At one point we locked eyes. And what do I mean by we?
Answer: the 2 of them and me.
It was honestly a miracle that I did not get into a road traffic accident.
I spent 3 days living in the hotel after that, my job long-forgotten in the aftermath.
By day 4 I broke down and called my older sister, asking to stay at her place for a while. Her house and area seemed fine the times I’d stopped over. I guess I clearly did not seem right though, as she many-a-time asked me what was wrong. My answer? Stress. She persisted, years of living together as kids helping her figure out my lies, though she ultimately gave up after a week. She knew it was something I didn’t want to share, and that I was safe now. That was enough for her.
For me? I guess at the time I so badly wanted to tell someone. Though it couldn’t be my sister. I didn’t want to cause any trouble. Nor see if she’d even believe me, or instead rank me at the same IQ level as her two 5-year-olds.
For a few weeks, I stayed with my sister and her family, reassuring both her and myself that I was fine. Thankfully, we worked together to find a small apartment. Next to a kids school too - bonus points. I now craved safety above all else. After moving out though, I realised I needed my belongings back.
So, who picked up my stuff from that cursed residence, you ask? The moving people. I called the police from a random phone booth first to head over to that area, emphasising on seeing some suspicious looking men, whilst I got them to collect everything. I did not dare to call the police on that family though. I would prefer if the link between me and them got cut, drawn and quartered.
So now I’m here, in an apartment which thankfully hasn’t shown any sign of insanity. Inspecting my belongings, I noticed that there was one thing missing.
My gold frame, used to encase my make-shift certificate - made by yours truly after her 21-day record from the previous apartment - was gone.
I felt somewhat miffed, but then I realised something.
Something which can maybe bring the light out in this whole situation.
I counted carefully. I broke my record.
With a grand stay of 2 days. Now that - that I don’t think I’d ever be able to beat.

submitted by PowerMinute1922 to nosleep [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 11:17 BackgroundChampion55 BASIC RULES OF GROWING 101

It's really simple if you follow basic rules, or at least it significantly reduces any problems related to nutritional availability or temperature, and humidity. 18 to 26c . 40-70% ph 6.0 to 6.3 Feed a fully complete 13 minimum required mineral solution N P K Ca Mg S Fe Mn Zn Mo Cu B Cl . 600ppm feed and up to 900 ppm runoff in carbon media 850ppm feed and up to 1300ppm runoff in inert media like water , rockwool, or gravel . 10k to 15k / lux seedling 15k to 35k veg 25k to 45k bloom When feeding, apply a 20% runoff to try to keep Salts from building up in the media. When your media dries out about one-third, apply another watering feeding two twenty percent runoff. When the bulk of the plant is as wide as your pot. This is when you can apply once a day. Feeding and that will allow the plant to continue to grow widthways, whereas normally, it would stop when it hits the edge of the pot. That is called the drip line. Keep track as this will be a pattern from now on. so: -water to 20% runoff - when pot dries out 1/3 from saturated to 2/3 wet watefeed to 20% runoff monitoring ph/ec to above levels. - when plants bulk width is as big as pot ie: 8" pot and 8" bulk of plant Not just the tips of the biggest leaves You can Start at least one watering daily. End follow the same rules about increasing frequency of watering. bigger pots = less watering smaller pots = more watering Both will equal roughly the same product. but the more water there is In the media, the more buffer you have in case of watering issues such as pump failure or you not being there. Smaller media with more watering is just more economical and less wasteful. The plant will take up the exact same water and nutrients per pound, no matter how you feed it. I usually choose a happy medium of around free 3>5 gal again following the common sense rules.
That's pretty much it these are the environmental conditions you need to try to get as close to as you can within reason. If it's eg 27c, do NOT buy an AC to get it to 25 or 26c . ( the within reason part ) All the other stuff like mold and pest control and stuff mostly happens when you lose control of your environmental conditions but these are the basic environmental and feed conditions that will allow you to focus on all the rest of the things above and beyond basic environmental and feed conditions.
THESE ARE EXCELLENT STARTING POINTS I RECORDED OVER 20 YEARS FULL TIME PRODUCTION. YOU MAY FIND YOUR PLANT LIKES A BIT MORE , A BIT LESS BUT WILL BE IN A REASONABLE RANGE .
This covers 99% of plant growth. Follow these basic rules within reason, and you will get 99% of your potential. Always make sure you have got a basic yield number. a yield with just proper technique and basic 13 mineral solution. Then, if you do add a new product, you will know whether it does anything or not. You will NEVER be unhappy with cannabis grown using just these basic parameters. DO NORMAL THINGS , EXPECT EXTRAORDINARY RESULTS 🙂 John ( always read, reason & then read some more) cannabis GROWERS SCIENCE group fb growersscience
submitted by BackgroundChampion55 to GROWERSSCIENCE [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:59 exsapphi New Zealand needs to be looking towards a green future for our own economic viability (as told through the history of glass)

The thing about this climate crisis that no one talks about is that economically, this is not new. This is the same sort of shift as any other massive economic shift we've seen in history, whether resulting from technology or environment or society or any combination of the three. It will be rapid; as rapid as the economic expansion of Europe when it discovered just how profitable colonisation and slavery were. But it's not really anything unseen in an economic sense.
How markets work is this: everything is just supply and demand. If there is a known demand for something, in a roundabout way, the market will ensure that demand is supplied. It might melt a few glaciers in the meantime, or be delayed by a war or two, but it's a force akin to that of nature, or evolution, or cause and effect. The markets will balance. Eventually.

A detour through history

The Chinese never developed eye-glasses. They didn't have the need for glass, because their drink of choice was tea, so the materials they worked with were mostly ceramics. In Europe, the cultural drink of refinement was wine. This didn't need to be kept hot, or be brewed and poured perfectly and all that stuff I'm told is important with tea. But it had requirements and qualities of its own, and one of them is that it looks pretty on display -- and that's why Europe developed and refined glass so much faster than China.
Glass is an incredibly old invention. It's fragile, much more fragile than pottery, so we rarely find it in archeological digs. But it's been invented in and/or expanded to many many cultures throughout history since at least 2000 BC in Egypt, Mesopotamia, and Syria, followed by the Greeks, the Romans, the Canaan, and the Persians. Basically anyone with an empire, including the Chinese, was making glass. Unfortunately they'd only just discovered transparent glass by the late Bronze Age, when the Bronze Age collapsed due to a series of environmental, migratory and urban changes.
(A good reminder that historically, periods of mass technological advancement are followed by civilisation collapses and dark ages. Until the present, of course. But that's been true of every present.)
A lot of glass-making technology was lost, but some important things were saved and some new stuff was rediscovered, and most of this discovering happened in Europe because they had, as I mentioned, wine. And rich people wanted to show off their pretty, colourful wine, and that only worked if your glass was transparent. And Italy had access to pure silica quartz, plus soda ash via their trade with the Levant, and so some clever spark there developed the first pair of eyeglasses.
And that's how you have Mecca, Italy and Venice (the latter of whom had been producing the famous Venetian glass, but moved all their glassmakers to Italy because they'd built all their buildings out of wood) all mass producing eye-glasses with consistent standards for Europe and the Middle East by the 14th century.
This might seem like a small development, but gradual loss of sight used to be a disability. Like, it seriously disabled people from doing many things. Far-sightedness meant artisans couldn't create and scholars couldn't read -- I can't even imagine how many people died falling off a horse just because they were short-sighted. For civilisations to have access to devices that got them decade of productivity out of some of the most skilled people in their societies was massive. And that's part of how you get European dominance over Asia, because the Chinese economic powerhouses didn't care about glass as much as Europe did. It's not enough to just invent something. To develop a technology, a society needs both the resources to play with and the need to play with it. That's why we get so much advancement from war. You can thank Germany for your microwave.

How on earth is this relevant to the market or our climate crisis?

Glass will be invented, and then it will be forgotten, and then it will be invented again. But only some economies flourished from it.
We have no control over anything but us. And that's terrifying. The climate change that crippled the Bronze Age wasn't even their fault and they still got thrown back to the Dark Ages.
We are going to see our own change in the market. We are going to live it. And one thing is true, whether National or ACT or BP like it or not: fossil fuels cannot continue to be relied upon as a commodity. Not long-term. It's a dying industry, slowly but surely, and it'll die whether we manage to wean ourselves off petrol or whether we use it all up first.
To a lesser extent, this is true of other non-renewables too. We are not at critical mass yet with our lithium-ion batteries, but we're now at the stage where people in the third world all seem to have cellphones. This is not a sustainable practice for a limited metal we have to mine from the earth. When something is running out, we don't have to stop using that material in the things we build; if we start to use it all up, it will soon get too expensive to build with, and that will stop us.
And that's why we have to stop using it: because if you as a country or industry pour all your energy and resources into developing technology based off that now-scarce resource, you will be left with no usable technology when that resource runs out.

What are National doing?

This is a political sub, so I won't mince words: something's gone wrong with National. Something's always been wrong with ACT, but National's change is recent. Power has been centralised in the board and the candidate selection process is no longer in the hands of the rank and file after Steven Joyce's shakeup, instead dominated by corporate interests. And they have dominated. We have a cabinet of lobbyists, and not just on National's side of the board; Luxon has pulled together the whole industry.
When we attribute "intentions" to things like forces and political parties, it can be easy to forget there's not a concerted, rational mind at play behind their decisions, and their actions are influenced by all of the people and factors and forces that make them up. When I say, "National has been bought by lobbyists", I don't mean every single person in the party is corporate shill. I just mean that there is enough corporate, business, and big-money influence in the party that they are no longer being governed primarily by their voter base or even their party members.
Nothing makes this more obvious than National's direction in politics. When your LABOUR and GREEN parties are the ones proposing to fix your climate crisis via free-market ingenuity that we can patent, sell on and capitalise off, something has gone wrong. There is money to be made in climate change, and National are off chasing oil down the bottom of a well.
If we don't wean ourselves off fossil fuels, we will find ourselves paying for it the increased price for them when we don't have the green technology to utilise at the end of supply. If we don't put our minds to green tech and science, we won't have the environment-saving and cleaning and reinforcing products and knowledge to sell on when the demand for them peaks through the ceiling -- instead we will be buying from other countries at big prices, paying to ship their experts here to tell us how to manage our estuaries or dump sites or skink habitats or whatever it is we need to fix next. New Zealand got lucky with our green energy; we were already using renewables by sheer coincidence when the climate crisis struck, and it made our transition to this new world very smooth. We will not be that lucky again.
Look at what we produce as a country. We held on far too long to our wool market out of some idea that it was "what we were supposed to be doing", and it nearly wrecked the country. Because it took us so long to change, and because we'd converted all our land into pasture, the most effective market for us to turn to became beef. Now that market is thriving, and we are willfully ignoring the real economic costs that will come with being a beef export country, and that cost is methane. There is not a future where countries will be allowed to emit methane for free. And there are no methane-light cows to switch to. Not until we develop them.
And this is what people talk about when they talk about environmental solutions still to be developed -- as if other people are going to develop them. That is incorrect. WE are the Cow Country. WE are the ones that should be foremost of the cow-fart field. If we do, we will be the ones benefitting by selling our bio-engineered cows and our science that made it happen. But if we don't, if we trail behind, we let other countries get out in front, and then our industry relies on them, and their industry outgrows us.
And these are all individual product or problem examples, but we are dragging our feet across the entire green industry. Why?

Big Oil does not care if your tech is Green

I say big oil, but there are other anti-environment and pro-corporate interests at play here. And again, there's not some big puppetmaster moving his pawn pieces, but there is influence, and companies don't want the world to go green, because when they do, they stop getting money for all the things they're getting money from right now. They don't care about the environment because they don't have the capacity to care; they are not a they. They are a force, a conglomeration, a hivemind of workers breaking their back for the company, until they clock off and become their own person again.
Their only interest is keeping ahold of their incredibly profitable market, and that market needs machines that use oil, and consumers willing to buy those machines, and people who aren't thinking about switching to a non-oil version of their tractor that doesn't exist yet (because no one has found the need to invent it. Or had the right resources.)
Oil cares about oil. Mining cares about mining. Tobacco cares about tobacco. Beef cares about beef. And we get value out of these industries as a country, as a society, so when they say"This thing is bad for me", we do have to listen to that. Otherwise we won't get our beef, or our oil. But "This thing is bad for ME" isn't the same as "This thing is bad for YOU". And companies are relying on consumers to not know the difference.

Back to National

Tobacco lobbyists have bought out Parliament, and are literally drafting our tobacco laws. And they are just one interest around the table. But they have had a huge effect. Imagine what's happening to the interests of your politicians when you have your lobbyists working together. Imagine where the interests of lobbyists for mining and oil might meet. Now imagine fisheries has a guy in there too.
Our oceans should be feeling very nervous right now.
It's the small influences we can't see that make these big decisions later on. The people who select our future MPs. The people who decide, hey, I'm going to try this new glass technique. But it takes an awful lot of decisions to make a glassblowing society.
A lot of what we do, we don't do consciously, like developing eye-glasses. But the benefit of our open democries, of our information-based societies, of our unprecedented understanding of economies and markets and science and climate, should mean that when we choose to do something consciously, we can do it.
When we don't, something has gone wrong.

A Green Future

To get to the sort of green economy the non-business parties are picturing, you need someone who has the time and acumen to get us there.
That SHOULD be National. There is so much involved in politics; our politicians are running so much. And they're spending most of their time undoing the last guy's policies. Labour's policies sound like the Greens. National doesn't have any except "win". ACT are doing Charter Schools again. And the policies are being made are being made in the interests of business people.
Our politicians don't have visions like Hollyoake of a New Zealand forging our own future, or Muldoon's determination to make things better for the average kiwi, or (heaven help me), Roger Douglass's respect for politics. None of the old guard are happy with how politics is shaping up, and certainly not the right, or who eventually became the right, in Douglass's case -- this is what he had to say on the subject: “John Key lived by the polls and it’s very dangerous. If you want to help people, you have to tell them the truth. The problem is that the politicians of today, they want to help themselves. So they poll in order to know what to say and it’s disgusting.”
I think in that one sentence, Douglass sums up everything wrong with the modern National Party. Once upon a time, National were in it to help people. They're not anymore.

Where to now?

It's all just markets.
If National won't change, they'll kill their market and they'll be replaced by a new party, just like the Liberal Party and Reform Party and Social Credit Party before them. National and Labour have always been around, but not always as these parties, or in these forms. The political spectrum will move to meet demand -- even when curtailed by corporate interests.
Or National will change, take control of their candidates and board, and live to fight for another century or so.
Either way, the economy will continue, and so will climate change. We will still need to develop new technologies using our available resources, and direct our technology-developing towards fixing environmental solutions. I hope New Zealand will benefit from this, and not just witness it. But if it's not National making the push, another political party will. We can see that happening right now, with the other parties suggesting their own green business ideas that National should be sweeping up votes for. There is voter and consumer demand for green businesses, and National are distracting us instead with shiny baubles because the corporations influencing them don't want you to see them.
Another thing Douglass was frustratingly right about: all our parties are doing at the moment is undoing each other's policies. It's hard to see New Zealand making any forwards progress at all if that's our direction.
submitted by exsapphi to nzpolitics [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:58 jenajiejing The Secret of Human Bodies – Examples Proving the Existence of the Greatest Creator

Xue Feng Though the modern medicine has limited knowledge of human bodies, what we have known is enough for us to admire the excellent human body structure and functions. Each system and organ in the human body is designed by the Greatest Creator. Even those trivial body parts have great functions. For example, there are several types of hairs on human bodies with distinct forms and functions. The head hair is designed to protect and beautify the head. It can grow long. According to the Bible, “But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.” The eyebrows can divert sweat and rain, preventing them into the eyes. That’s why they are lined above the two eyes. Eyelashes can prevent the dust and other things from entering the eyes. That’s why they are lined on the sides of the eyelids. Also they stand forward in a special curve because it wouldn’t hinder the eyesight or pierce into the eyes when closing the eyes. If the eyebrows and eyelashes are too long, they will hinder the eyesight. That’s why they wouldn’t grow as long as the hair or beards. The nasal hairs can filter the inhaled air. That’s why they grow inside the nostril and stand sideways and outwards. If they stand inwards, the other things will find it easy to come into the nostrils and difficult to go out. The armpit hairs can prevent the partial friction and help the sweat evaporate. Without the armpit hairs, we have to raise our arms. Otherwise the skin under the arm will become inflamed because of the friction and moist. Required by the function, the armpit hairs cannot grow as long as the head hairs, or as short as the eyebrows. Besides, they are soft and curving. If they are rigid and coarse, they will hurt the skin. And cilia grow on the intestinal epithelium. The cilia grow downward and vibrate together. The vibrating waves move downward from upward to help move down the intestinal contents. Cilia also grow on the airway and bronchus epithelium. However, they grow and vibrate in the opposite direction as those on the intestinal epithelium. Only in this way can they move the sputum upward to the throat and spit them. If they grow downward, the airway and bronchus would get stuck by the sputum and the humans would die from it. Now I wish to take two simple reflections of human bodies as an example. When foreign matters enter the nostrils or airways, they will arouse two protective reflections, sneeze or cough, which is designed to repel the foreign matters. But due to different situation, these two reflections differ in their approaches. The foreign matters in the nostrils are not urgent so the sneeze reflection can be prepared in a composed way. First, inhale slowly; open the mouth, and the soft place move upward to block the nostril. Then breathe in enough air through the mouth, and the pleural body contracts sharply to emit the air in the lungs quickly. When the emitting reaches its peak, the tongue rises abruptly to block the mouth to repel the air to go out swiftly through the nostrils. In this way the foreign matters in the nostrils are driven out. However, if the foreign matters enter the airway, it is an emergent situation. If the foreign matters are not driven out timely, the life will be put at risk. The inhaling is strictly forbidden because it will make the foreign matters go deeper and cause suffocation. So the cough doesn’t include the inhaling. Instead, the glottis closes immediately. At the same time, the pleural body contracts suddenly and adds the lung air pressure extremely. When the pressure is at its strongest point, the glottis opens suddenly and the lung air sends out explosively, compelling the foreign matters in the airway to the throat via the glottis. At this time, the soft place rises to block the nostrils. The foreign matters are spit out through the mouth. If the tongue and the soft place perform the same way as in the sneeze, the foreign matters emitted out of the airway will enter the nostrils, causing another trouble. In these two reflections, the body parts must cooperate closely. Any failure in the coordination will lead to the failure of the reflection, causing serious consequences. So these activities are not done freely. Instead, they are done as required by their functions and set procedures. These procedures are not learnt or practices. The program has been rooted in our brain nerve structure (nerve nucleus) when we are born. Otherwise, the babies will not survive. The advanced computer science has made it possible to simulate these activities. However, the simulation requires 3 conditions: 1. Device simulating the inhale and exhaling of human mouth, nose, throat, pleural and the sensing device; 2. The central control equipment simulating nerves and body system (compute, input and output devices). The above two devices are hardware. And software is also needed, namely (3). A program composed in strict compliance with the requirements to control the performance and procedure of each link, and arrange them in perfect coordination. All the three conditions are imperative. Otherwise the reflections can’t be realized. The program itself is not a substance structure. Instead, it is a smart use and spiritual result. There will be no such a thing as the program without the smart use. So we have to ask, the program is composed by the humans and stored in the computer, how about the control program in the human brain. Is it also composed by someone and stored in the human brain? Sneeze and cough are the simplest examples. There are numerous automatically controlled physical, bio-chemical and pathological human body activities, which are even more sophisticated than reflections of cough. Even today, some of them remain mysteries to us. So how are these sophisticated control programs composed? And where do they come from? Now let’s have a look at the sensory organs on human bodies. Why do we have two ears? The reason is that one ear is not able to identify the direction. With the ears lying on two sides of the head, the sound reaches the ears in sequence of time. Based on the slight receiving time difference, the brain can judge where the sound comes from. The auricle is the most outward component of the ear. It can introduce the sound into the external auditory canal. Within the auricle there is a thin layer of cartilage helping to retain the form of auricle, giving it wonderful elasticity and protecting it from the clashes. Without the cartilage, the auricle is just two useless pieces of skin hanging on the head side. If the thin bone is inside the auricle, it will break easily even if when you are sleeping on your side, damaging the auricle. There is fuzz on the outer segment of the external auditory canal preventing the sand and dust. The inner segment secretes cerumen to prevent insects. When foreign matters enter the external auditory canal, it will trigger head shaking, instead of sneeze or cough, to get the matters out. Because the external auditory canal is a blind passage, it is impossible to repel the foreign matters with air. Why don’t the foreign matters in the nostrils arouse the head-shaking reflection to repel them? That’s because the nostrils of humans almost lie in the middle of the head. The shaking is not able to produce enough centrifugal force. Besides, the human nostrils face downward and it is improper to repel the foreign matters by shaking the head. The sound is produced by the mechanical vibration of objects and is transmitted by the air fluctuation, or the sound waves. The human ears are actually working like a precise mechanical vibration monitor. In the inner ear there are a number of keyboards with different sizes, producing nerve impulses produced by echoing with corresponding frequencies. The brain, in accordance with the features of these impulses, identifies the strength, tunes and timbre of the sounds. We must note though there are many sensory organs in human bodies, only the inner ear is protected by the most solid and firm bones. In fact, it lies in the cave part of the temporal bone. Of all the sensory organs, only the ears monitor the mechanical vibration, which needs a relatively fixed position. Otherwise, it is not able to monitor the sound. If the inner ear lies in the soft tissues, when the sound wave arrives, the inner ear will vibrate with it. Thus it can hear nothing. Now the inner ear lies in the firm bone and it can’t sense the air vibration. So it is imperative to reduce the density waves to the mechanical vibrations before sending them to the inner ear. And there is such a reduction device at the middle bottom of the external auditory canal, which is called the eardrum. The eardrum has enough space to receive the air pressure. It is thin enough to vibrate when the sound wave arrives. Meanwhile, the eardrum is strong enough to push the transmission device. The long handle of the middle ear cartilage is attached to its inner side, the tensile force of which makes the eardrum sink inside slightly to maintain certain tension. This allows the eardrum to accurately reduce the arriving sound waves into the mechanical vibrations. No matter what the temperature is, the vibration function is not impacted. After the sound waves are reduced into the mechanical vibration, some rigid objects are needed to transmit the vibration to the inner ear. Of all body tissues, the most rigid objects are the bones. However, the bones are heavy in general and covered by the soft tissues, which are not suitable for the audio vibration. However, in the tympanic cavity between the eardrum and the inner ear, there are three unique tiny bones with delicate forms measured in millimeters. They are almost completely exposed to the air in the tympanic cavity. These three tiny bones are connected by ligament and form a transmission chain in curve with excellent audio vibration function, able to transmit accurately the vibration of the eardrum to the inner ear. The transmission device can properly multiply the weak vibration and reduce the strong sound wave. All of these structures are the super designs required by the acoustics. There are even smarter designs in the hearing organ. For example, to make the eardrum vibrate freely following the arriving sound waves, the two sides of the eardrums must be exposed to the air. As a result, there is a tympanic cavity full of air in the middle ear. If the cavity is filled by liquids, just as other cavities are, the eardrum is not able to vibrate because the liquids can’t contract. Besides, the cavity does not only need to be filled with air, but also needs to be connected to the outside world with a proper passage, to balance the static air pressure in the cavity with the outside air pressure. Otherwise, the air in the cavity will gradually be absorbed, causing the eardrum to sink excessively or damaging it. When the outside air pressure changes, (such as in mountain climbing, diving, the airplane takeoff or climate change), it will arouse uncomfortable feelings or lead to hearing malfunction. But the middle ear can’t be opened to the outside world directly, just like the external auditory canal or nostrils can. The reason is that the direct exposure will make the arriving waving sound reach the two sides of the eardrums at the same time via the external auditory canal and middle ear passage, counteracting the sound pressure. Thus the eardrums will not vibrate at all, unable to produce the hearing. So it is a difficult problem to connect the middle ear and the outside world. However, the human body, with a smart design, solves this problem. The middle ear is opened at the two sides in the upper rear of the pharynx via a half-opened passage (the so-called auditory tube). The auditory tube is locked in common times and only opened temporarily when taking the swallowing actions, balancing the air pressure in the middle ear shortly. After the swallowing action is over, the auditory tube is locked again. Apart from eating, human body would regularly take swallowing action unconsciously, even when he or she is sleeping. Thus the air pressure in the middle ear can be adjusted from time to time and avoid the hearing from being hindered. Besides, when swallowing, the swallowing segment and the soft palate will definitely rise, blocking the mouth and nostrils against the outside world. So on the moment when the ear and throat are opened shortly, though the air in the throat can enter the middle ear, the sound waves from the outside world are blocked against the middle ear. As a result, the hearing will not be interfered and can receive the outside sound and voice. Only the throat in the body can meet the special demand of the hearing organs. The throat is originally designed as part of the digestion and breathing system, it does not belong to sensory system. However, it can cooperate so smartly with the hearing organs. We have to admire the extremely delicate body-wise design. The vestibule in the inner ear controls the balance of the body. In the vestibule there are 3 semicircular canals. When the body loses balance, the mutually-vertical semicircular canals produce the balance impulse, which triggers the corresponding reflection via the balance center in the medulla brain. Why are there 3 semicircular canals instead of 2 or 4? And why are they mutually vertical? The reason is apparent. Humans live in the 3-dimensional space. There are 3 mutually-vertical movement directions, namely, front and rear, left and right, upward and downward. So the 3 mutually-vertical semicircular canals can monitor the movements. The number less than 3 or more than 3 would be insufficient or redundant. We can see the delicate and smart structure and function, and the supreme wisdom in them. They can’t be the accidental results. As the most important perception of human bodies, vision provides more information than that provided by all other perceptions. The vision is the perception of image and space and the visual organs must have the most precise and accurate structure completely different from other sensory organs. As a result, in the perspective of the embryo-genesis or neuro-anatomy, the main structure of the eyes is not just the common receptor. Instead, it is part of the cerebral cortex. The so-called optic nerves are completely different from other cerebrospinal nerves. In essence, the optic nerves are inner structure in the brain, transmitting the most sophisticated visual information. The eyes function like a precise camera. The retina composed of the photoreceptor cells is just like the films. The crystal, iris and the cornea works like the lens, diaphragm and the filter. However, the precision and automatic adjustment of the eyes is no match of any high-quality cameras. For example, the lens in modern cameras is made of special glass or hard plastics with fixed focal distance. When taking pictures for the landscapes with different distances, the lens position must be adjusted. Otherwise, the image will not be produced on the films. But this is an awkward approach. Imagine when the eyes are watching landscapes with different distances, the eyeballs have to protrude or recess alternatively, which looks ugly or damages the health and function of the eyes. However, the crystal in the eyes are transparent and elastic colloid, which can adjust automatically the focal distance in accordance with the distance of the objects to make sure all the objects can be imaged on the retina, without changing the position of the crystal. Such automatic adjustment function can’t be fulfilled by any camera. If we observe the eyes in the perspective of modern TV technologies, the eyes are more like the television camera, but thousands of times more precise than the television cameras. The TV image is composed of dense pixels (the mixed dark or brilliant light spots). Till now, the best TV image only contains less than 1 million pixels. However, the human eyes can produce image containing 20 billion pixels. Only the eyes can see the details of objects. No matter how clear or accurate the image is, it is still a plan view image. Then how the eyes can provide the dimensional image is a key issue of providing the complete vision. But it is not an easy task at all to convert the flat view image into the dimensional one. For a long time, people have been puzzled by how the conversion is done. Of course, we later knew the smartness and delicacy of the human body shown here. The two eyes send the flat view images they receive into the same nerve center, which contrasts and analyzes the images and judges the distance of the objects based on the slight visual angle difference caused by the position difference of the two eyes. Thus the dimensional image is produced. That’s why people have to have 2 eyes to establish the complete vision. Based on such understanding, humans have invented the dimensional movies. But the above is only the external process of how vision is formed. People have little knowledge about how the visual center works inside. We have to admit that the mysteries of human body structure and functions are beyond the intelligence of mankind. As a matter of fact, the distance judgment with two eyes is the triangulation technique which is precise and automatic. The accurate measurement needs two premises. First, the two eyes must focus on one object at the same time. Otherwise, there will be double vision, which means the one objects will be seen as two objects. As a result, the complete neuromuscular system is equipped on the outside of the eyeballs, making the eyeballs the most flexible and accurate organs. The ciliary muscle inside the eyeballs can adjust the conversion rate of the crystal at any time to focus on the object and form the clearest image. Second, the retina of the two eyes must be strictly symmetrical. Otherwise, the image contrast of the two eyes will become impossible. Furthermore, the images received by the two eyes must be transmitted at the same time to the same visual center for contrast and analysis. There are two visual nerves on the left and right side of the brain, supervising respectively the two sides of the vision field. The objects in the left of the vision field are reflected, via the eye pupil, on the retina of the right sides of the two eyeballs. The corresponding images in the two eyes, via the visual nerve, are sent to the visual center on the right side of the brain. The objects in the right of the vision field are reflected, via the eye pupil, on the retina of the left sides of the two eyeballs. The corresponding images in the two eyes, via the visual nerve, are sent to the visual center on the left side of the brain. The two visual nerves contrast the corresponding images coming from the eyes and produce the full-field dimensional images. The pairs of human parts are often symmetrical on the outside. Only the retinas are symmetrical in the same position. Namely, the left side is symmetrical to the left side and the right side symmetrical to the right side of the two retinas. That’s because the light rays come in directly. Otherwise, the visual centers can’t receive the corresponding images or get the coordinated vision. The structural symmetry of the retinas in the two eyes must be accurate to the utmost. Otherwise the images in the two eyes will not comply with each other and the ambiguity will occur. Besides, the corresponding images from the two eyes must be sent to the same visual center. Thus the optic nerves must have the corresponding special structure to realize the cross-transmission of the images. This is the unique “chiasma opticum” unique to the optic nerves. This function is not possessed by any other nervus cerebrospinalis because they don’t handle the information of images and space. If we use the computers and monitoring cameras to simulate the process of human vision, the input network of the computers has to have a similar chiasm. No other design can do it. Judging from the above, we can find all the human organs, structures and functions have shown the supreme wisdom. And these are the ways they should be. Some people think that human body has some useless organs, such as the thymus gland, appendix, tonsil and coccyx, in order to prove the human structure is imperfect. Some people used to believe that these organs were not that useful. Instead, they tend to arouse diseases such as appendicitis and tonsillitis. If these organs are cut off, it will not have much impact on the human body. In the past, people used to classify spleens and other organs into the useless organs. There was a list of useless organs in the past which included over 100 organs. But the list was long not because these organs are useless but because people at the time were ignorant. As more we know about the organs, most of them have been deleted from the list and there are only a few still remain in the list. Some people think that these organs are the leftovers of human evolution, which are called the “waste back organs” and use them as one of the evidences of evolution theory. This is a complete misunderstanding. Till not we have understood there are no such things as the “obsolescent organs”. It is simply the lack of knowledge of these organs. Take the thymus gland as an example. In the past, people didn’t know its function. Now we have understood it is the warning device of the human body against the inner and outer infection sources. As a result, the thymus gland contributes a lot to the human health. Another example, if the coccyx fractures, it will cause serious functional disturbance. So the coccyx is also an imperative part of human body. Some people might say these organs can trigger diseases. Then all human organs can lead to diseases, even brain and heart are of no exceptions. Why don’t we say the brain and heart are useless? Some organs, though they are not as important as the heart and brain and wouldn’t endanger life immediately when eliminated, are also useful. Just like if the hands or feet are lost, though not fatal, the human body is handicapped. After knowing the supreme and smart design of human structures and functions, you might want to know how they come into being. Who has designed and made such sophisticated and precise organs? We cannot avoid the question. Any truth-seeking person would admit that the extremely delicate organs and structures are not produced naturally or accidently. For instance, if someone gives you a top-class camera and tells you it is a natural one without designer or manufacturer; do you think his words are scientific and acceptable? The human body, which is even more delicate, accurate, flexible and practical, must have a supremely wise and capable creator behind it. On a spring Sunday morning in 1954, I saw a young stranger sitting in the chamber of a Church. When we started to talk, I knew that he was a student at Peking Union Medical College. He said to me, “Since I studied anatomy and physiology, I have felt the human body is really a wonder. It is not possible to understand it unless we interpret the wonder with a God.” He came to the church to seek an answer. The wonder of this young man is not the only example. I remember that when I was studying anatomy and physiology in school, some students surrounded our physiology teacher and kept asking him questions. Finally, the teacher, annoyed by so many questions, told us, “Please stop the questions because they will lead to religion in the end.” Because of the special political background at the time, the teacher’s warning silenced all the students. But his warning impressed me deeply and remained in my memory till today. My thought at that time was that the teacher was right because all the things were created by the God. Though he was not a Christian, he had to admit the truth and the further probe into the human body mysteries (part of the Universe mysteries) would definitely lead to the existence of the God (religion) in the end. Otherwise, it would be impossible to explain the wonders of the human body. The Bible says, “For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse.”(1:20 Romans 1) Was the teacher demonstrating his scientific spirit? No. The scientific spirit means the truth and boldly pursuit of the truth without avoiding any controversy. The teacher knew very clearly that one more step forward would lead to the God but he dared not move onto the path towards the truth. Instead, he asked his students to stop there. It has shown that many people refuse to admit the existence of God not because they don’t have the scientific spirit but because of the social pressure, individual consideration for their interest and prospect, just as what the teacher was doing at that time. Nevertheless, the existence of the God would not change. And we cannot live in such considerations for the reality forever. One day in the future, when we have to face the ultimate choice, we will have to face the supreme master who has created the Universe and the human beings. The Bible says, “And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment.” If we don’t accept the immoral God now, we have no excuse when it comes to the day. When we talk about the origin of all things in the Universe, some young people often ask, “You have said the humans are created by the God, then who has created the God?” The analogizing logics seem to be reasonable. But it is not true. Because the God is the creator instead of the created, you can’t link these together. The table is made by the carpenter. But you cannot say the carpenter and the table have the same origin. Human benings’ understand of the God is only limited to the enlightenment from the God to the humans. Otherwise, humans cannot understand the mystery of God’s nature. The God says, “I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the ending, saith the Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the Almighty.” (Exodus 3:14 and Revelation 1:8). For the God, there is only the eternality, and there is no time, beginning or ending. Even in the scientific field, too many analogizing questions won’t be tolerated. One scholar was talking about the belief in the God with his students. One student asked suddenly and proudly, “Where does the Universe come from?” The scholar answers, “The Universe is created by the God.” The student continued to ask, “Who has created the God?” The scholar answered, “The God is Alpha and Omega and I am not created.” The student said, “This is not scientific at all.” The scholar then asked the student, “Where does the Earth come from?” The student answered, “The Earth comes from the Sun.” The scholar continued to ask, “Where does the Sun come from?” The student answered, “The Sun comes from the Galaxy.” The scholar asked again, “Where does the Galaxy come from?” The student hesitated and answered, “The Galaxy comes from the nature.” The scholar continued to ask, “Where does the nature come from?” The student couldn’t answer this question and said in anger, “The nature is the nature and comes naturally.” The scholar then laughed, “This is not scientific at all.” So we can conclude that the “scientific” answers are not scientific. Another example is that the sciences tell people that substances are composed of the molecules. Then what are the molecules composed of? The molecules are composed of the atoms. But what are the atoms composed of? They are composed of the electrons, protons and neutrons. Then what are the electrons, protons and neutrons composed of? Till now, we cannot find an answer to this question. The atomic physicists are now working hard to find the “elementary particle”. They are called “basic particles” because the scientists don’t expect the substances to be divided limitlessly. So they believe that one day they will find the ultimate component, the “elementary particle”. Of course, the scientists will not ask such question of “what is something composed of?” This is the extremity and everything ends here. The materialists claim that the Universe is limitless and that the materials are eternal and can be divided limitlessly, etc. They are simply the groundless conclusion of the philosophers. And there is an extremity in their logics, the materials. They say that the materials are Alpha and Omega but can’t tell where the materials come from. Now let’s have a look at the math. All numbers come from 1, followed by 2, 3…. You can’t ask what the 1 is because 1 is 1, and not other numbers. It means that 1 is the origin of all numbers. The Greatest Creator has created all things and the Greatest Creator is the origin of them. It will be meaningless to ask where the Greatest Creator comes from.
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2024.05.19 10:57 Lawnerd2022 Advice needed

Hi, I posting here as I don’t know where else to post and who to ask for advice.
Briefly, I met a guy last year on a dating app, we had a couple of dates and nothing happened at all. After a few weeks, I kinda lost interest due to my personal life and circumstances and I told him and ask him if he would accept to be my friend. He got a bit mad and said that for him we had a mental relationship even though we met every now and then and nothing had happened and conversation were not sexualized at all nor was there any seduction or I would have put a stop to it… He stopped talking for a few weeks and then came back by himself saying he accepted but that he was not that close to friends and that we were going to talk occasionally which I agree with. Months passed and we kept talking by messages and on the phone and he started being or trying to be ambiguous so I had to restate that we were friends as we had agreed on. But at that moment he said that he wanted more and that if I didn’t want then we would be friends and not talk that much. I agreed with it since I never initiate contact almost and he is the one calling etc. He tried to put some dilemma on me like if you expect me to talk this much (we have a call once every few weeks and messages probably once every other day) otherwise I won’t do it etc. I told him his definition and modalities of what a friendship was fine to me and that we could follow his rule. Here is when he started saying that he didn’t need any more friend and that this wasn’t a friendship. I told him that I didn’t understand as talking to someone casually the way we do is very much of a friendship to me, how else could we call it ? Especially after having defined and agreed on it a few months back. I felt bad of having responded to his texts and calls as I do for other friends as I have the impression it mislead him even though I am particularly careful with my words and actions so as never to be ambiguous (I even mentioned many times our friendship etc). Although, I am by nature a friendly and caring person with my friends I don’t believe I could have given him wrong signals. Or is it already too much to talk and be nice to someone ? But isn’t it what friends do ? Also I am not dating right now but the day I will I usually have no problem talking about that with friends, how will he react ?
Something else that makes me question his personality is that he said that what we were doing was not being friends. I am surprised to say the least as I have the chance of having friends and this is usually what happens with them, I mean we talk and call and see each other just to enjoy time together. He asked me what these friendship bring to me and I said joy and happiness. And he said that he is busy and only has friends that bring him something and help him through his life goals. I said I respected his concept of friendship but I can’t help but wonder if this isn’t a bit particular way of thinking… Also I asked him if for him there was no value in time shared with loved ones just for the sake of it even with family, and he said no and that he would only for example spend time with his mom to pay her back for what she did for him. I was astonished but I didn’t comment further.
Am I wrong ? Did I misbehave ? What is happening ? Is it me or this is a strange way from him to try to “force” something with me ? How could he still want something with someone who told you “no” so many times ? Should I put some more space between us ?
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2024.05.19 10:57 jenajiejing The Secret of Human Bodies – Examples Proving the Existence of the Greatest Creator

The Secret of Human Bodies – Examples Proving the Existence of the Greatest Creator

Xue Feng

https://preview.redd.it/inye2mb6lc1d1.jpg?width=606&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=91a7161a35c1824c81442d04ca1efb17d2cbda20
Though the modern medicine has limited knowledge of human bodies, what we have known is enough for us to admire the excellent human body structure and functions. Each system and organ in the human body is designed by the Greatest Creator. Even those trivial body parts have great functions. For example, there are several types of hairs on human bodies with distinct forms and functions. The head hair is designed to protect and beautify the head. It can grow long. According to the Bible, “But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.” The eyebrows can divert sweat and rain, preventing them into the eyes. That’s why they are lined above the two eyes. Eyelashes can prevent the dust and other things from entering the eyes. That’s why they are lined on the sides of the eyelids. Also they stand forward in a special curve because it wouldn’t hinder the eyesight or pierce into the eyes when closing the eyes. If the eyebrows and eyelashes are too long, they will hinder the eyesight. That’s why they wouldn’t grow as long as the hair or beards. The nasal hairs can filter the inhaled air. That’s why they grow inside the nostril and stand sideways and outwards. If they stand inwards, the other things will find it easy to come into the nostrils and difficult to go out. The armpit hairs can prevent the partial friction and help the sweat evaporate. Without the armpit hairs, we have to raise our arms. Otherwise the skin under the arm will become inflamed because of the friction and moist. Required by the function, the armpit hairs cannot grow as long as the head hairs, or as short as the eyebrows. Besides, they are soft and curving. If they are rigid and coarse, they will hurt the skin. And cilia grow on the intestinal epithelium. The cilia grow downward and vibrate together. The vibrating waves move downward from upward to help move down the intestinal contents. Cilia also grow on the airway and bronchus epithelium. However, they grow and vibrate in the opposite direction as those on the intestinal epithelium. Only in this way can they move the sputum upward to the throat and spit them. If they grow downward, the airway and bronchus would get stuck by the sputum and the humans would die from it.
Now I wish to take two simple reflections of human bodies as an example. When foreign matters enter the nostrils or airways, they will arouse two protective reflections, sneeze or cough, which is designed to repel the foreign matters. But due to different situation, these two reflections differ in their approaches. The foreign matters in the nostrils are not urgent so the sneeze reflection can be prepared in a composed way. First, inhale slowly; open the mouth, and the soft place move upward to block the nostril. Then breathe in enough air through the mouth, and the pleural body contracts sharply to emit the air in the lungs quickly. When the emitting reaches its peak, the tongue rises abruptly to block the mouth to repel the air to go out swiftly through the nostrils. In this way the foreign matters in the nostrils are driven out. However, if the foreign matters enter the airway, it is an emergent situation. If the foreign matters are not driven out timely, the life will be put at risk. The inhaling is strictly forbidden because it will make the foreign matters go deeper and cause suffocation. So the cough doesn’t include the inhaling. Instead, the glottis closes immediately. At the same time, the pleural body contracts suddenly and adds the lung air pressure extremely. When the pressure is at its strongest point, the glottis opens suddenly and the lung air sends out explosively, compelling the foreign matters in the airway to the throat via the glottis. At this time, the soft place rises to block the nostrils. The foreign matters are spit out through the mouth. If the tongue and the soft place perform the same way as in the sneeze, the foreign matters emitted out of the airway will enter the nostrils, causing another trouble. In these two reflections, the body parts must cooperate closely. Any failure in the coordination will lead to the failure of the reflection, causing serious consequences. So these activities are not done freely. Instead, they are done as required by their functions and set procedures. These procedures are not learnt or practices. The program has been rooted in our brain nerve structure (nerve nucleus) when we are born. Otherwise, the babies will not survive.
The advanced computer science has made it possible to simulate these activities. However, the simulation requires 3 conditions: 1. Device simulating the inhale and exhaling of human mouth, nose, throat, pleural and the sensing device; 2. The central control equipment simulating nerves and body system (compute, input and output devices). The above two devices are hardware. And software is also needed, namely (3). A program composed in strict compliance with the requirements to control the performance and procedure of each link, and arrange them in perfect coordination. All the three conditions are imperative. Otherwise the reflections can’t be realized. The program itself is not a substance structure. Instead, it is a smart use and spiritual result. There will be no such a thing as the program without the smart use. So we have to ask, the program is composed by the humans and stored in the computer, how about the control program in the human brain. Is it also composed by someone and stored in the human brain? Sneeze and cough are the simplest examples. There are numerous automatically controlled physical, bio-chemical and pathological human body activities, which are even more sophisticated than reflections of cough. Even today, some of them remain mysteries to us. So how are these sophisticated control programs composed? And where do they come from?
Now let’s have a look at the sensory organs on human bodies. Why do we have two ears? The reason is that one ear is not able to identify the direction. With the ears lying on two sides of the head, the sound reaches the ears in sequence of time. Based on the slight receiving time difference, the brain can judge where the sound comes from. The auricle is the most outward component of the ear. It can introduce the sound into the external auditory canal. Within the auricle there is a thin layer of cartilage helping to retain the form of auricle, giving it wonderful elasticity and protecting it from the clashes. Without the cartilage, the auricle is just two useless pieces of skin hanging on the head side. If the thin bone is inside the auricle, it will break easily even if when you are sleeping on your side, damaging the auricle. There is fuzz on the outer segment of the external auditory canal preventing the sand and dust. The inner segment secretes cerumen to prevent insects. When foreign matters enter the external auditory canal, it will trigger head shaking, instead of sneeze or cough, to get the matters out. Because the external auditory canal is a blind passage, it is impossible to repel the foreign matters with air.
Why don’t the foreign matters in the nostrils arouse the head-shaking reflection to repel them? That’s because the nostrils of humans almost lie in the middle of the head. The shaking is not able to produce enough centrifugal force. Besides, the human nostrils face downward and it is improper to repel the foreign matters by shaking the head. The sound is produced by the mechanical vibration of objects and is transmitted by the air fluctuation, or the sound waves. The human ears are actually working like a precise mechanical vibration monitor. In the inner ear there are a number of keyboards with different sizes, producing nerve impulses produced by echoing with corresponding frequencies. The brain, in accordance with the features of these impulses, identifies the strength, tunes and timbre of the sounds.
We must note though there are many sensory organs in human bodies, only the inner ear is protected by the most solid and firm bones. In fact, it lies in the cave part of the temporal bone. Of all the sensory organs, only the ears monitor the mechanical vibration, which needs a relatively fixed position. Otherwise, it is not able to monitor the sound. If the inner ear lies in the soft tissues, when the sound wave arrives, the inner ear will vibrate with it. Thus it can hear nothing. Now the inner ear lies in the firm bone and it can’t sense the air vibration. So it is imperative to reduce the density waves to the mechanical vibrations before sending them to the inner ear. And there is such a reduction device at the middle bottom of the external auditory canal, which is called the eardrum. The eardrum has enough space to receive the air pressure. It is thin enough to vibrate when the sound wave arrives. Meanwhile, the eardrum is strong enough to push the transmission device. The long handle of the middle ear cartilage is attached to its inner side, the tensile force of which makes the eardrum sink inside slightly to maintain certain tension. This allows the eardrum to accurately reduce the arriving sound waves into the mechanical vibrations. No matter what the temperature is, the vibration function is not impacted. After the sound waves are reduced into the mechanical vibration, some rigid objects are needed to transmit the vibration to the inner ear. Of all body tissues, the most rigid objects are the bones. However, the bones are heavy in general and covered by the soft tissues, which are not suitable for the audio vibration. However, in the tympanic cavity between the eardrum and the inner ear, there are three unique tiny bones with delicate forms measured in millimeters. They are almost completely exposed to the air in the tympanic cavity. These three tiny bones are connected by ligament and form a transmission chain in curve with excellent audio vibration function, able to transmit accurately the vibration of the eardrum to the inner ear. The transmission device can properly multiply the weak vibration and reduce the strong sound wave. All of these structures are the super designs required by the acoustics.
There are even smarter designs in the hearing organ. For example, to make the eardrum vibrate freely following the arriving sound waves, the two sides of the eardrums must be exposed to the air. As a result, there is a tympanic cavity full of air in the middle ear. If the cavity is filled by liquids, just as other cavities are, the eardrum is not able to vibrate because the liquids can’t contract. Besides, the cavity does not only need to be filled with air, but also needs to be connected to the outside world with a proper passage, to balance the static air pressure in the cavity with the outside air pressure. Otherwise, the air in the cavity will gradually be absorbed, causing the eardrum to sink excessively or damaging it. When the outside air pressure changes, (such as in mountain climbing, diving, the airplane takeoff or climate change), it will arouse uncomfortable feelings or lead to hearing malfunction. But the middle ear can’t be opened to the outside world directly, just like the external auditory canal or nostrils can. The reason is that the direct exposure will make the arriving waving sound reach the two sides of the eardrums at the same time via the external auditory canal and middle ear passage, counteracting the sound pressure. Thus the eardrums will not vibrate at all, unable to produce the hearing. So it is a difficult problem to connect the middle ear and the outside world. However, the human body, with a smart design, solves this problem. The middle ear is opened at the two sides in the upper rear of the pharynx via a half-opened passage (the so-called auditory tube). The auditory tube is locked in common times and only opened temporarily when taking the swallowing actions, balancing the air pressure in the middle ear shortly. After the swallowing action is over, the auditory tube is locked again. Apart from eating, human body would regularly take swallowing action unconsciously, even when he or she is sleeping. Thus the air pressure in the middle ear can be adjusted from time to time and avoid the hearing from being hindered. Besides, when swallowing, the swallowing segment and the soft palate will definitely rise, blocking the mouth and nostrils against the outside world. So on the moment when the ear and throat are opened shortly, though the air in the throat can enter the middle ear, the sound waves from the outside world are blocked against the middle ear. As a result, the hearing will not be interfered and can receive the outside sound and voice. Only the throat in the body can meet the special demand of the hearing organs. The throat is originally designed as part of the digestion and breathing system, it does not belong to sensory system. However, it can cooperate so smartly with the hearing organs. We have to admire the extremely delicate body-wise design.
The vestibule in the inner ear controls the balance of the body. In the vestibule there are 3 semicircular canals. When the body loses balance, the mutually-vertical semicircular canals produce the balance impulse, which triggers the corresponding reflection via the balance center in the medulla brain. Why are there 3 semicircular canals instead of 2 or 4? And why are they mutually vertical? The reason is apparent. Humans live in the 3-dimensional space. There are 3 mutually-vertical movement directions, namely, front and rear, left and right, upward and downward. So the 3 mutually-vertical semicircular canals can monitor the movements. The number less than 3 or more than 3 would be insufficient or redundant. We can see the delicate and smart structure and function, and the supreme wisdom in them. They can’t be the accidental results.
As the most important perception of human bodies, vision provides more information than that provided by all other perceptions. The vision is the perception of image and space and the visual organs must have the most precise and accurate structure completely different from other sensory organs. As a result, in the perspective of the embryo-genesis or neuro-anatomy, the main structure of the eyes is not just the common receptor. Instead, it is part of the cerebral cortex. The so-called optic nerves are completely different from other cerebrospinal nerves. In essence, the optic nerves are inner structure in the brain, transmitting the most sophisticated visual information. The eyes function like a precise camera. The retina composed of the photoreceptor cells is just like the films. The crystal, iris and the cornea works like the lens, diaphragm and the filter. However, the precision and automatic adjustment of the eyes is no match of any high-quality cameras. For example, the lens in modern cameras is made of special glass or hard plastics with fixed focal distance. When taking pictures for the landscapes with different distances, the lens position must be adjusted. Otherwise, the image will not be produced on the films. But this is an awkward approach. Imagine when the eyes are watching landscapes with different distances, the eyeballs have to protrude or recess alternatively, which looks ugly or damages the health and function of the eyes. However, the crystal in the eyes are transparent and elastic colloid, which can adjust automatically the focal distance in accordance with the distance of the objects to make sure all the objects can be imaged on the retina, without changing the position of the crystal. Such automatic adjustment function can’t be fulfilled by any camera.
If we observe the eyes in the perspective of modern TV technologies, the eyes are more like the television camera, but thousands of times more precise than the television cameras. The TV image is composed of dense pixels (the mixed dark or brilliant light spots). Till now, the best TV image only contains less than 1 million pixels. However, the human eyes can produce image containing 20 billion pixels. Only the eyes can see the details of objects. No matter how clear or accurate the image is, it is still a plan view image. Then how the eyes can provide the dimensional image is a key issue of providing the complete vision. But it is not an easy task at all to convert the flat view image into the dimensional one. For a long time, people have been puzzled by how the conversion is done. Of course, we later knew the smartness and delicacy of the human body shown here. The two eyes send the flat view images they receive into the same nerve center, which contrasts and analyzes the images and judges the distance of the objects based on the slight visual angle difference caused by the position difference of the two eyes. Thus the dimensional image is produced. That’s why people have to have 2 eyes to establish the complete vision. Based on such understanding, humans have invented the dimensional movies. But the above is only the external process of how vision is formed. People have little knowledge about how the visual center works inside. We have to admit that the mysteries of human body structure and functions are beyond the intelligence of mankind.
As a matter of fact, the distance judgment with two eyes is the triangulation technique which is precise and automatic. The accurate measurement needs two premises. First, the two eyes must focus on one object at the same time. Otherwise, there will be double vision, which means the one objects will be seen as two objects. As a result, the complete neuromuscular system is equipped on the outside of the eyeballs, making the eyeballs the most flexible and accurate organs. The ciliary muscle inside the eyeballs can adjust the conversion rate of the crystal at any time to focus on the object and form the clearest image. Second, the retina of the two eyes must be strictly symmetrical. Otherwise, the image contrast of the two eyes will become impossible. Furthermore, the images received by the two eyes must be transmitted at the same time to the same visual center for contrast and analysis. There are two visual nerves on the left and right side of the brain, supervising respectively the two sides of the vision field. The objects in the left of the vision field are reflected, via the eye pupil, on the retina of the right sides of the two eyeballs. The corresponding images in the two eyes, via the visual nerve, are sent to the visual center on the right side of the brain. The objects in the right of the vision field are reflected, via the eye pupil, on the retina of the left sides of the two eyeballs. The corresponding images in the two eyes, via the visual nerve, are sent to the visual center on the left side of the brain. The two visual nerves contrast the corresponding images coming from the eyes and produce the full-field dimensional images. The pairs of human parts are often symmetrical on the outside. Only the retinas are symmetrical in the same position. Namely, the left side is symmetrical to the left side and the right side symmetrical to the right side of the two retinas. That’s because the light rays come in directly. Otherwise, the visual centers can’t receive the corresponding images or get the coordinated vision. The structural symmetry of the retinas in the two eyes must be accurate to the utmost. Otherwise the images in the two eyes will not comply with each other and the ambiguity will occur. Besides, the corresponding images from the two eyes must be sent to the same visual center. Thus the optic nerves must have the corresponding special structure to realize the cross-transmission of the images. This is the unique “chiasma opticum” unique to the optic nerves. This function is not possessed by any other nervus cerebrospinalis because they don’t handle the information of images and space. If we use the computers and monitoring cameras to simulate the process of human vision, the input network of the computers has to have a similar chiasm. No other design can do it. Judging from the above, we can find all the human organs, structures and functions have shown the supreme wisdom. And these are the ways they should be.
Some people think that human body has some useless organs, such as the thymus gland, appendix, tonsil and coccyx, in order to prove the human structure is imperfect. Some people used to believe that these organs were not that useful. Instead, they tend to arouse diseases such as appendicitis and tonsillitis. If these organs are cut off, it will not have much impact on the human body. In the past, people used to classify spleens and other organs into the useless organs. There was a list of useless organs in the past which included over 100 organs. But the list was long not because these organs are useless but because people at the time were ignorant. As more we know about the organs, most of them have been deleted from the list and there are only a few still remain in the list. Some people think that these organs are the leftovers of human evolution, which are called the “waste back organs” and use them as one of the evidences of evolution theory. This is a complete misunderstanding. Till not we have understood there are no such things as the “obsolescent organs”. It is simply the lack of knowledge of these organs. Take the thymus gland as an example. In the past, people didn’t know its function. Now we have understood it is the warning device of the human body against the inner and outer infection sources. As a result, the thymus gland contributes a lot to the human health. Another example, if the coccyx fractures, it will cause serious functional disturbance. So the coccyx is also an imperative part of human body. Some people might say these organs can trigger diseases. Then all human organs can lead to diseases, even brain and heart are of no exceptions. Why don’t we say the brain and heart are useless? Some organs, though they are not as important as the heart and brain and wouldn’t endanger life immediately when eliminated, are also useful. Just like if the hands or feet are lost, though not fatal, the human body is handicapped.
After knowing the supreme and smart design of human structures and functions, you might want to know how they come into being. Who has designed and made such sophisticated and precise organs? We cannot avoid the question. Any truth-seeking person would admit that the extremely delicate organs and structures are not produced naturally or accidently. For instance, if someone gives you a top-class camera and tells you it is a natural one without designer or manufacturer; do you think his words are scientific and acceptable? The human body, which is even more delicate, accurate, flexible and practical, must have a supremely wise and capable creator behind it.
On a spring Sunday morning in 1954, I saw a young stranger sitting in the chamber of a Church. When we started to talk, I knew that he was a student at Peking Union Medical College. He said to me, “Since I studied anatomy and physiology, I have felt the human body is really a wonder. It is not possible to understand it unless we interpret the wonder with a God.” He came to the church to seek an answer. The wonder of this young man is not the only example. I remember that when I was studying anatomy and physiology in school, some students surrounded our physiology teacher and kept asking him questions. Finally, the teacher, annoyed by so many questions, told us, “Please stop the questions because they will lead to religion in the end.” Because of the special political background at the time, the teacher’s warning silenced all the students. But his warning impressed me deeply and remained in my memory till today. My thought at that time was that the teacher was right because all the things were created by the God. Though he was not a Christian, he had to admit the truth and the further probe into the human body mysteries (part of the Universe mysteries) would definitely lead to the existence of the God (religion) in the end. Otherwise, it would be impossible to explain the wonders of the human body. The Bible says, “For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse.”(1:20 Romans 1) Was the teacher demonstrating his scientific spirit? No. The scientific spirit means the truth and boldly pursuit of the truth without avoiding any controversy. The teacher knew very clearly that one more step forward would lead to the God but he dared not move onto the path towards the truth. Instead, he asked his students to stop there. It has shown that many people refuse to admit the existence of God not because they don’t have the scientific spirit but because of the social pressure, individual consideration for their interest and prospect, just as what the teacher was doing at that time. Nevertheless, the existence of the God would not change. And we cannot live in such considerations for the reality forever. One day in the future, when we have to face the ultimate choice, we will have to face the supreme master who has created the Universe and the human beings. The Bible says, “And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment.” If we don’t accept the immoral God now, we have no excuse when it comes to the day.
When we talk about the origin of all things in the Universe, some young people often ask, “You have said the humans are created by the God, then who has created the God?” The analogizing logics seem to be reasonable. But it is not true. Because the God is the creator instead of the created, you can’t link these together. The table is made by the carpenter. But you cannot say the carpenter and the table have the same origin. Human benings’ understand of the God is only limited to the enlightenment from the God to the humans. Otherwise, humans cannot understand the mystery of God’s nature. The God says, “I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the ending, saith the Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the Almighty.” (Exodus 3:14 and Revelation 1:8). For the God, there is only the eternality, and there is no time, beginning or ending.
Even in the scientific field, too many analogizing questions won’t be tolerated. One scholar was talking about the belief in the God with his students. One student asked suddenly and proudly, “Where does the Universe come from?” The scholar answers, “The Universe is created by the God.” The student continued to ask, “Who has created the God?” The scholar answered, “The God is Alpha and Omega and I am not created.” The student said, “This is not scientific at all.” The scholar then asked the student, “Where does the Earth come from?” The student answered, “The Earth comes from the Sun.” The scholar continued to ask, “Where does the Sun come from?” The student answered, “The Sun comes from the Galaxy.” The scholar asked again, “Where does the Galaxy come from?” The student hesitated and answered, “The Galaxy comes from the nature.” The scholar continued to ask, “Where does the nature come from?” The student couldn’t answer this question and said in anger, “The nature is the nature and comes naturally.” The scholar then laughed, “This is not scientific at all.” So we can conclude that the “scientific” answers are not scientific. Another example is that the sciences tell people that substances are composed of the molecules. Then what are the molecules composed of? The molecules are composed of the atoms. But what are the atoms composed of? They are composed of the electrons, protons and neutrons. Then what are the electrons, protons and neutrons composed of? Till now, we cannot find an answer to this question. The atomic physicists are now working hard to find the “elementary particle”. They are called “basic particles” because the scientists don’t expect the substances to be divided limitlessly. So they believe that one day they will find the ultimate component, the “elementary particle”. Of course, the scientists will not ask such question of “what is something composed of?” This is the extremity and everything ends here. The materialists claim that the Universe is limitless and that the materials are eternal and can be divided limitlessly, etc. They are simply the groundless conclusion of the philosophers. And there is an extremity in their logics, the materials. They say that the materials are Alpha and Omega but can’t tell where the materials come from. Now let’s have a look at the math. All numbers come from 1, followed by 2, 3…. You can’t ask what the 1 is because 1 is 1, and not other numbers. It means that 1 is the origin of all numbers. The Greatest Creator has created all things and the Greatest Creator is the origin of them. It will be meaningless to ask where the Greatest Creator comes from.
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2024.05.19 10:55 karma0207 I just feel hopeless and feel like an inconvenience.

I didn't even know what I had was HS until about a few months ago. And I've had it for many years now.
When I brought it up to my mom, she said she's faced it when she was younger and it's a result of weight and eating desserts. To stop both, fix my PCOS and be healthy in life.
I just wish it was not this difficult. The doc said nothing can be done and she's put me on a five day antibiotics with mupirocin everytime the flare gets really bad. She has reintroduced isotretinoin orally since two weeks (I had taken it for my grade 3 cystic acne back in 2020 and it helped clear my whole face up)
The lumps in my underarms and my groin area just make me feel so hopeless. They keep coming. And hurts like a fucking bitch everytime I move my arm or sit or get up.
To lose weight, I need to work out. My derm asks me not to work out till the flare goes down to avoid sweating and friction when it's agitated. The flare goes down with the meds, and then I try to work out and it comes back up. It's a fucking vicious cycle, I just feel lost. And to worsen it, I live in an extremely humid beach city, which ranks in top 10 of the most polluted cities in the world, lol.
Uptil recently I was ignoring the fuck out of it, thinking it's my problem and I've to deal with it and there is no way out. That hasn't changed but what my partner said made me feel different. He said - you shouldn't have to suffer through this. There has to be a way out. One dermat saying there is no way out can't be it, right?
And he was also the one who encouraged me to get medical help for my acne because that shit was horridly painful and use to affect my daily life. He was like - fuck the cosmetics reasons, if something can be done to improve your quality of life and not be in pain, why should you suffer?
And it makes me think - is there no way to find a solution for my HS? There are days where I can't help with home chores and just feel absolutely disgusted with myself and disappointed in myself for being such an inconvenience. My partner assures me and asks me never to worry about chores, etc and to rest. And also appreciates and compliments me so much and tells me this doesn't bother him. (He's helped me bandage it up and drain it many times)
But I just feel - so tired. Just tired. Very tired. It hurts to think this is how the rest of my life will be like. I'm only 27. And I just feel like an inconvenience. A nuisance. Feel like his life would be better off without me. Probably with someone who is healthy, without HS, PCOS, fitter and happier.
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2024.05.19 10:54 insanebraincrane What is wrong with my approach to love? M/26 22F

Hey,

This is gonna be long-winded and probably incoherent, but I just need to get this off my chest and if you have any insight regarding why it's constantly happening to me I'd love to hear it.
I consider myself a pretty introverted guy, but I've generally had no issues talking with girls and getting dates, more so recently of course, since I've been growing more comfortable in my own skin. I'm definitely a romantic, I never understood the attitude of guys that treat girls like trash, that just doesn't compute in my head. If I love something, I'm going to take care of it to the best of my ability.
I think we have all had that experience of "the one that got away", well mine was no different. The girl I met when I started uni was special, she was drop dead gorgeous, completely my type, witty and cracked jokes like I would, we finished each other's sentences, we had the same ideas and ambitions. Everything was going great, I was on cloud nine and I never even thought about this like that, but this girl made me think that she's the one I'm gonna marry. We were celebrating new year's at a mutual friend's house and we hooked up, it was phenomenal. Literally 2 days later she ghosts me out of nowhere, I panic. I reach out to talk to her face to face to see what's going on. She obliged reluctantly and word for word said "I'm sorry it's not going to work, you are too good for me".
Now, I've had my heart broken a few times by this point, but this... This was devastating.
I went to a dark place in my own mind, stopped talking with everyone, started doing drugs and generally engaging in self-destructive behavior. It was really hard accepting the fact that my best was never enough for her, I blamed myself constantly, I cried dozens of times alone outside. Whenever a song came up on the radio that reminded me of her my whole mood changed, even if it was jolly prior. I generally am able to keep a cool and straight face when I'm around family as I never want to talk about my own problems, mostly because I know that if I do I will fucking meltdown so I steer clear, I never want them to feel sorry for me, but even they thought something weird was going on and kept asking me questions.
It took me a good 3 years to accept what happened and start trying to move on, as you can imagine my confidence was shattered for that whole time and my self-worth was at an all time low. I started dating again, but not to find love, I don't believe in that anymore, just for sex and to feel wanted. I would tell girls what they wanted to hear, hook up and bail. Hell, sometimes they only wanted sex too, that was optimal. If I didn't get intimate with a girl on the 2nd date I would just look for someone else, I never wanted to put in any effort into actually cultivating anything meaningful or fulfilling. I would always feel like shit when I would pump and dump, because deep down I know what I was doing and that it wasn't me, but I also craved the satisfaction. Looking back, I was definitely perpetuating my own trauma.
Now, I used mainly dating apps, sometimes just start texting people I knew. But a few weeks ago I was at the supermarket and just on my phone walking, when some girl just ran in front of me at speed and knocked me off balance for a moment, she just glanced back at me and I saw how pretty she was, it sent a shock down my body. She was hurrying to get some beer, which I respected and admired. When we were on our way out I approached her to talk to her, told her she caught my eye and asked for her number. She gave me the digits, but she was so flabbergasted it was really funny and cute. We went on a date the next day, she's amazing, we mesh so well together. She's smart and responsible, takes care of her parents same as I do, we found a lot in common. I was thrilled, I never approached anyone like this and the time I felt that I had to do it - it paid off in a big way. I was falling for her and she was for me.
We went on dates, we had fun, talked and walked a lot. I bring her lunch to work, flowers sometimes. She was celebrating a sister's birthday one evening and I had taken her from the place to her apartment, she said she wanted me to stay the night, so I did. It was glorious, we both had a great time.
After that she ghosted me, she doesn't text me first anymore. I have to show all the initiative now, whenever I try to set up dates she's busy. To be fair she is pretty busy, she has 2 jobs and she's one of those people like me that don't pull out their phone when hanging out with someone, just not that attached to technology which I really vibe with. She spends a lot of time with her family, she has sisters and cousins that are all the same age and they hang out in the evenings at her place or at her sister's place and I trust that she's not lying. I've met her cousins, they are all really sweet. But I just feel like she's lost interest in me, I keep trying to get something going but her response times are getting longer and longer.
Honestly I've never seen a switch flip so suddenly, it's like she's a different person now. We used to be so intimate, not only in a sexual way but she would sleep on my chest, hug me in her sleep, squeeze me and not let me go, now she barely gives me any attention. It feels like I'm a burden on her right now. She told me that she has always had trouble with relationships because she's so busy with work and it never worked due to this, but I also feel like she could make time for me if she wanted to, but just chooses not to. I feel like I'm about to get my heart annihilated again.
I don't want to lose her, she made me believe in love again. I truly love this girl and want to build my future with her. I keep fighting the urge to reach out to her and try to make it work, but I think that pulling back might be the best play, however painful it might be right now.
Why is it that always when something good happens to me it never lasts.. Always disappointment after disappointment. What is wrong with me?
submitted by insanebraincrane to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:50 Vertx11 That hopeless feeling

I'm so confused and upset with myself and would love some opinions on how I need to proceed. My (31m) wife (32f) has been telling me I have a mental disorder. I recently found out she resents me for breaking up with her 15 years ago in high school. We've been married 11 years now and the past year has seemed really off to me. Every disagreement we have, she ends up screaming at me, telling me I'm a sorry POS dad and husband. She calls me a narrsisist and says I gaslight her. I honestly try so hard to not even disagree with her because I know she will blow up on me and yell at me in front of the kids. I finally confronted her in a calm way about how she gets too upset with our daughter yelling at her and getting upset about things and channeling that frustration into our 9yo daughter. My wife told me I was gaslighting her and that she was sick of me and it would be easier just to stop talking to me. We haven't had a conversation in 2 weeks. She doesn't sleep with me anymore and when I try to initiate conversation she just glares at me. I feel and have felt for the past year like I'm handling everything wrong and that's why she hates me. I'm making an appointment to see if I have a mental disorder or issue because if I do, it would make sense that I feel like I'm right about things when I'm wrong about them. I take our kids to almost all of their appointments, I pack their school lunches every night, I clean the house and wash the dishes/clothes with almost no help from my wife for the past few years and she belittled me about that saying "you think your such a good husband but you do that so you can gaslight me." I only do it so I can be more helpful. I've never raised my voice at her or our kids and she makes fun of me by mocking the way I speak extra softly when we get in a disagreement. She has never accepted fault for anything or apologized about one single thing in the past 10 years of marriage and I find myself apologizing and bending over backwards just so that we get along. I'm so sorry if this seems really jumbled up but I'm really upset and feel terrible and sick to my stomach because I don't know if I can save us this time. She's a wonderful mother and an amazing, independent woman. I just feel like there's a chance I'm not 100% of the problem. Could I get some opinions on my situation please?
submitted by Vertx11 to AITAH [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:46 WillShitpostForFood I had no idea how bad it would be until I started exterminating them.

My wife and I bought a house on the water a few years ago. For the first year and a half we never really saw roaches. Then work had both of us away from home for about 14 hours a day. We would occasionally see one. Recently she made the decision to be a stay at home mom though. At first the frequency of the sightings was about the same until it became less as the house was kept cleaner. Then suddenly a couple of weeks ago we couldn't go into the kitchen without seeing one. Then it became multiple every time.
Last night I made the decision to solve the problem. I bought spray killer for when I see live ones, some bait stations, diatomaceous earth powder, expanding foam spray, a syringe of gel bait, some tabs of boric acid, and some repellant spray for around my outside doors and windows. I came home and started pulling everything out from the wall and cabinets.
Opened a few appliances, cleaned them out, pulled out all the drawers and emptied out the cabinets. Thought I had found the source right then. There were (what I thought at first) so many. There had to be at least 50. I began spraying them down and killing as many as possible. Wiped everything out, threw some powder down, and went forward. I pulled every outlet out of my wall. The GFCI's were hell. I have no idea why they seem to love GFCI's so much. Threw some boric acid tabs through the gaps in the outlet box, sealed off the hole with the expanding foam, threw some powder in the outlet box, and reinstalled my outlets. By this time I thought I was just about home free.
Then I found one going into the seam of my kitchen bar. I never really notice there was a seam. I figured I'd just spray into that crack and see if it happens to kill that one. As soon as I did that, dozens began running out of where I sprayed. The seam goes along the entire under-side of my bar. I had to know, so naturally. I sprayed the entire length of the bar and unleashed hundreds of them. They were coming out faster than I could keep up with. I used the entirety of my spray killer and they were still coming out. I had my wife load out pump sprayer with our concentrated vinegar (it was all I had on hand) and continued spraying until it stopped. I was clearly unprepared. This was one seam on the bottom side of my counter. I went ahead and did the rest of them and have no doubt amassed a death toll in the thousands.
Considering that I've had nightmares about roaches for as long as I can remember, today was definitely my personal hell but I'm thankful that I've at least taken a shot back at the problem. My Alpine WSG will be here next week. I need a shower.
submitted by WillShitpostForFood to GermanRoaches [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:43 brottochstraff Coping skills not working any more

I have had periodic depression since my early twenties, I’m 39 now. It usually starts in the autumn and lasts until late spring. But sometimes longer. I used to not notice it when I was younger I just connected it to external factors of life. But now I’m much more self aware of the problem and try not to blame outside factors like work, relationships etc because I know it’s a false path. I tried that before. Changing jobs, changing relationships, moving cities, it does not make a difference - this dark cloud follows me everywhere.
My symptoms are: * negative thinking - and over focus on negatives around me. Like noisy neighbors, politics, increasing prices of things, my job etc etc - I become like a grumpy grandfather.
My coping patterns have been the following:
Now to my problem: I can’t use those coping mechanisms any more. I now have a wife and child and a house. They need me. My son needs me. I can’t just escape in to my computer for hours of the day or go to gym. He’s just below 1 year old and he needs somebody to watch him all the time. I love the little guy. But in combination with my depression I find my self in a negative spiral.
I feel like I’m doing everything against the stream - I have to force everything I do through out the day. Playing, cleaning , cooking. Doing projects around the house that need doing. I find my self complaining a lot, and my wife is fed up with it already. And I can understand her. Im constant grumpy and tired. By the end of the day I have used up all my willpower to do anything to the point where I don’t even want to brush my teeth before going to bed. I have 0 action energy left. I have not even changed my clothes in like 4 days.
On top of that there are social events that were not there before. Meeting with daycare parents, my wife’s friends that also just got kids etc. I really dread those but I force my self to pull through. And some times my grumpy mood shines through and I make everybody feel bad.
I guess I’m kind of involuntary project my mood on others and make them feel the same way. But I feel bad about it at the same time.
I don’t know what to do now. There’s no where for me to escape and hide with my dark cloud now and recharge my energy. I have to be there everyday. I’m worried that this new life that is more demanding than before will ruin my marriage and break apart my family.
My wife has been very understanding and suggested I should take a day here and there for my self. And I have. But it seems to not be enough. I feel guilt for taking that day off and leaving everything at home to my wife. And then when I come back the energy I have regained is gone very fast. It’s not sustainable.
In a few months I have to go back to work and I’m not sure I will be able to. I’m worried about getting fired or burned out. I have nightmares about my marriage ending and can’t sleep properly because the little guy wakes up multiple times at night. I feel like they would be happier without me to be honest, at least this version of me that I hate my self. I don’t want to be like this, but I am anyway.
I don’t know where I should start now. I thought I had it figured out living with my depression but now I feel hopeless and I have not answers for my self.
submitted by brottochstraff to depression [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:42 Humeon Advice for managing without pantoprazole

I developed regular heartburn and reflux around 2020 which I originally managed with OTC antacids. After a bit over a year I got sick of living on Quick-Eze and spoke to my GP who put me on prescription esomeprazole 20mg. A combination of reduced efficacy and a desire to not spend the rest of my life on a PPI led my GP to book me in with a gastroenterologist where I got to undergo a bunch of tests including an endoscopy, 48 hour pH monitor and a esophageal manometry (easily the worst medical experience of my life so far lol).
After all this I was diagnosed with GERD as well as some cells in my esophageal opening that needed monitoring but were described by the specialist as "pre-pre-cancerous" (which I have no idea what it means but I have to have an endoscopy every 18 months as a result). Specialist put me on pantoprazole 40mg which I have mostly been on since - I did try weaning off on GP's advice however a bout of gastritis saw me back on it again.
I'm now at a stage where I want to get off pantoprazole as I want to commit to trying to isolate different potential problem foods and see if I can reduce my symptoms with diet changes alone. I also developed pretty bad pains/myalgia in my side/chest muscles while on panto which I'm already seeing some improvement in since stopping about a week ago. The issue is in just a week my heartburn has returned with a vengeance.
Anyone have anything that worked for them to better manage symptoms (not expecting a complete elimination) while weaning off PPIs?
submitted by Humeon to GERD [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:40 hydra1280 If you could have a gimmick in a fantasy world, what would it be

Mine would be something like 'I Became The Convenience Store King In A Cultivation World', you can't tell me that isn't a title you might be interested in reading. Imagine the MC suddenly in a fantasy world in a convenience store, unlocking a system that made me the "Convenience Store King". My system could be directly tied to profit margins with all forms of currency and materials being exchangeable for goods like fresh chip packets or ice creams.
Going into story recap mode:
Leaving the store, it disappears and vanishes into my system storage with an information window that I can summon it on its own or by using an inner space like a cave or doorway. Suddenly, I am travelling to the nearest city, working a bunch of odd jobs to afford things that I want in my convenience store, delivered in packages and boxes. Soon enough, a cultivator group is riding through and stops at the city to ask about monsters and beasts that might have attained sentience and began cultivating. It is then that they come across my store which only has 2 windows and a door in the middle of a shack, showing the inside and attracting their curiosity. Going inside they were perplexed about the expansion of the inner space, thinking it was the product of a cultivator and that maybe the mortal simply picked up the item. I reassured them and gave them some discounts, alluring them with the taste of modern confectionary products that they can't simply steal because the interior suppresses their cultivation. With no other choice, they buy some of the stock and get hooked, taking some for later and paying with spiritual stones once they ran out of taels since they had spent most buying information.
Coming back bursting through my store which expanded to a business district store instead of a shitty stall, the cultivators came back to buy more with their mysterious master, allowing me to get more spiritual stones and buy a spiritual energy sucker that solved my electricity billing problem and gives me more cash to spend. It is then that the sect master shows herself with her regal and youthful appearance, demanding my servitude, something I refuse and she smirks at, saying she is interested in me and asks me to return with her, to which I only agree if I can open a store in the sect where both inner and outer disciples can shop. She agrees and we get to go on a flying ship after I sell my store, using an instantly deployable Yurt that I got as a system reward to continue selling until I got to the sect. At the sect, the sect leader set me up with a store at the gateway for outer disciples when they need to attend mass or graduate to an inner disciple. Every time a new item came in stock there would be an uproar of people wanting to taste it and give it a try with even the sect master coming by to buy food, drinks and clothing. All the while I would be learning the sect's cultivation techniques and taking some time off to join others in their activities.
As time passes, the store is updated with security cameras, metal detectors, an ice machine, a bigger store, more storage in the back, stronger doors and locks, an emergency call button to the sect and a TV that I can use to look at cameras or watch the internet from back in my world. I would also use the sect to get a magical beast who would help manage the store and I would train with good quality meat that other convenience stores wouldn't usually sell. Together the two of us would manage the store and train in cultivation, going on adventures since my importance would warrant inner disciple status and maybe get me picked as the sect master's direct disciple, allowing me to bring and use my store and eventually upgrade it to have different entry points. Upgrading the store brings me benefits like opening branches that all connect to the same store, bringing in extra business as I also create meeting rooms for those wishing to use the store's spacial property to connect with others like a mail service or
submitted by hydra1280 to randomideasorthoughts [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:34 Monkelover2 My encounter with paranormal.

It happened while I was eight.Me and my family had a private property where we would go while it was summer.It was night and everyone was asleep except me who was woken up by a strange sound.It sounded like someone was smashing rocks not too far away from our house.At first I thought it was hogs as those were native to our region,but we didn't have any crops so there was no reason for them to come here.I shrugged it off and tried going to sleep,but the sound was coming closer and closer.I scaredly turned around,but there was nothing,and the sound seemed to stop,while in reality it sort of,,restarted'',going back to slow to fast to slow to fast.I woke up my mom because I was scared,and the second I did,the sound disappeared. My mom told me to go back to sleep,but the second i closed the door,it resumed.I had hard time falling asleep,but around midnight,I was woken up by something I will never forget as long as I live.Something grabbed my leg and started to pull me with all its force,and I screamed from top of my lungs.The tugging stopped the second my dad came in,asking me if I was alright.I was crying out of fear and my dad stayed there with me till the morning,even thought he didn't belive me.When I woke up,I saw a hand print on my leg and I stood there for a few minutes.I told my grandma about this as she would always tell me creepy stories about paranormal.I told her abt my problem and she told me that I will sleep soundly tonight.I saw her carrying a shovel and a bag,but I didn't think much about it.The sound never appeared again,and whatever was in that room never came back.
submitted by Monkelover2 to Paranormal [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:33 Excellent-Welcome408 New diagnosis 😞 Refreshing yet alarming

I was recently diagnosed with IR after self referring to an endocrinologist. It’s nice to finally figure out what’s going on with me but still scary and concerning! How have you all dealt with your diagnosis?
About me: I’m prior military and continue a work out habit of 4-5x/week weight training and cardio. I’ve never met BMI in my adult life but otherwise have been generally healthy with a low to avg BP, great cholesterol levels, no thyroid issues etc.
However over the last 2 years my weight has just continued to creep. My A1C has been trending up but I’m still in the “normal” range 0.1 from being diabetic. I’ve dealt with debilitating fatigue and just recently a MRI revealed an enlarged liver with liver enzymes elevation to match. My PCP blew me off telling me to stop drinking (which I don’t 😒). So I self referred…
I always thought I might’ve had PCOS but just managed my adult acne and hirutism with laser hair removal. But i never had the other symptoms. Now my endo has prescribed ozempic/wegovy and I’m on week 1 of usage. I’m less concerned about the weight loss and more concerned about the internal health factors that it can remedy.
I also want to explore some hollistic methods as well for long term intervention.
It just feels crazy to do “everything right” and still have these problems.
submitted by Excellent-Welcome408 to PCOS [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:31 SettingIntentions I want to get living again... Not behind screens all the time

I used to adventure all of the time. I'd explore caves, ride motorcycles, go to waterfalls, meet new people, go on hikes all over the place, just ride around and explore what I could find. In 2023, I went through a lot of stress and trauma, and also just stopped taking care of myself. I didn't realize just how shape I had gotten, until I got smacked with a panic attack and also realized I was putting on weight when looking at myself in the mirror...
I want to get living again. I'm sitting here on a free Sunday afternoon. Old younger version of me would be on the dirt bike exploring a trail, or heading out to check out a cave.
I did used to be a bit reckless when I was younger, but I want to be safer now. I still want to adventure, but just take more mind to safety. I would over-do things when I was younger, now I'm a bit more wiser (I hope).
The problem is that as I've grown up and gotten out of shape it's lead to me becoming very scared. I am constantly afraid about whether or not I can handle XYZ adventure, even if it's a very light adventure. My sleep is fucked, I constantly wake up at 12pm or later and sleep 2-3am. I very struggle to make plans.
In many ways these problems (poor sleep & poor planning) is from my moderate success making money online. I can work anytime. anywhere. I don't need to be up at 8am... But I'd love to be up at 8am, not to "hustle" but to enjoy some nature activities.
I've been working out... Intensely. It's just depressing making progress but still being so far behind where I used to be. I want to cry just writing this out. A "hard" day these days is what an easy day was just a few years ago. And it's because of that that I'm scared to do any motorcycle ride or hike or any adventure, no matter how easy it is, because I know I'm not as strong as I was before physically.
I've also had mental trauma, and I'm seeing a therapist. Believe me, I'm attacking in many ways. Seeing an EMDR therapist to heal my mental trauma from last year, and working out intensely. I just need to fix my sleep and get in the habit of planning again and also get adventuring regularly again to show my brain that it's okay and that I don't need to be terrified (and also prove to myself that I'll "adventure responsibly" by using safety equipment and not overdo it, etc.).
I'm tired, and I think I'm addicted to YouTube, Reddit, Facebook, doomscrolling, staring at hot girls on IG, playing video games, etc, I just hate it. I feel like I can only think short-term and struggle planning, and I often feel like I'm in "withdrawal" when I'm not medicating with scrolling and whatnot. I think those things keep me up later at night, too.
I'd love to get out again. On a nice hike. Rock climbing. In a cave. Enjoying a waterfall. Cruising on a beautiful road early in the morning with little traffic.
What upsets me even more is that I definitely have the time and ability to do these things, it's just mainly my mental issues and bad sleep and bad planning holding me back. I have a huge list of adventures written out, I know what I want to do, I just have to get doing it more regularly.
Help, how can I get back on track?
submitted by SettingIntentions to Advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:31 SettingIntentions I want to get living again... Not behind screens all the time

I used to adventure all of the time. I'd explore caves, ride motorcycles, go to waterfalls, meet new people, go on hikes all over the place, just ride around and explore what I could find. In 2023, I went through a lot of stress and trauma, and also just stopped taking care of myself. I didn't realize just how shape I had gotten, until I got smacked with a panic attack and also realized I was putting on weight when looking at myself in the mirror...
I want to get living again. I'm sitting here on a free Sunday afternoon. Old younger version of me would be on the dirt bike exploring a trail, or heading out to check out a cave.
I did used to be a bit reckless when I was younger, but I want to be safer now. I still want to adventure, but just take more mind to safety. I would over-do things when I was younger, now I'm a bit more wiser (I hope).
The problem is that as I've grown up and gotten out of shape it's lead to me becoming very scared. I am constantly afraid about whether or not I can handle XYZ adventure, even if it's a very light adventure. My sleep is fucked, I constantly wake up at 12pm or later and sleep 2-3am. I very struggle to make plans.
In many ways these problems (poor sleep & poor planning) is from my moderate success making money online. I can work anytime. anywhere. I don't need to be up at 8am... But I'd love to be up at 8am, not to "hustle" but to enjoy some nature activities.
I've been working out... Intensely. It's just depressing making progress but still being so far behind where I used to be. I want to cry just writing this out. A "hard" day these days is what an easy day was just a few years ago. And it's because of that that I'm scared to do any motorcycle ride or hike or any adventure, no matter how easy it is, because I know I'm not as strong as I was before physically.
I've also had mental trauma, and I'm seeing a therapist. Believe me, I'm attacking in many ways. Seeing an EMDR therapist to heal my mental trauma from last year, and working out intensely. I just need to fix my sleep and get in the habit of planning again and also get adventuring regularly again to show my brain that it's okay and that I don't need to be terrified (and also prove to myself that I'll "adventure responsibly" by using safety equipment and not overdo it, etc.).
I'm tired, and I think I'm addicted to YouTube, Reddit, Facebook, doomscrolling, staring at hot girls on IG, playing video games, etc, I just hate it. I feel like I can only think short-term and struggle planning, and I often feel like I'm in "withdrawal" when I'm not medicating with scrolling and whatnot. I think those things keep me up later at night, too.
I'd love to get out again. On a nice hike. Rock climbing. In a cave. Enjoying a waterfall. Cruising on a beautiful road early in the morning with little traffic.
What upsets me even more is that I definitely have the time and ability to do these things, it's just mainly my mental issues and bad sleep and bad planning holding me back. I have a huge list of adventures written out, I know what I want to do, I just have to get doing it more regularly.
Help, how can I get back on track?
submitted by SettingIntentions to selfimprovement [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:31 SettingIntentions I want to get living again... Not behind screens all the time

I used to adventure all of the time. I'd explore caves, ride motorcycles, go to waterfalls, meet new people, go on hikes all over the place, just ride around and explore what I could find. In 2023, I went through a lot of stress and trauma, and also just stopped taking care of myself. I didn't realize just how shape I had gotten, until I got smacked with a panic attack and also realized I was putting on weight when looking at myself in the mirror...
I want to get living again. I'm sitting here on a free Sunday afternoon. Old younger version of me would be on the dirt bike exploring a trail, or heading out to check out a cave.
I did used to be a bit reckless when I was younger, but I want to be safer now. I still want to adventure, but just take more mind to safety. I would over-do things when I was younger, now I'm a bit more wiser (I hope).
The problem is that as I've grown up and gotten out of shape it's lead to me becoming very scared. I am constantly afraid about whether or not I can handle XYZ adventure, even if it's a very light adventure. My sleep is fucked, I constantly wake up at 12pm or later and sleep 2-3am. I very struggle to make plans.
In many ways these problems (poor sleep & poor planning) is from my moderate success making money online. I can work anytime. anywhere. I don't need to be up at 8am... But I'd love to be up at 8am, not to "hustle" but to enjoy some nature activities.
I've been working out... Intensely. It's just depressing making progress but still being so far behind where I used to be. I want to cry just writing this out. A "hard" day these days is what an easy day was just a few years ago. And it's because of that that I'm scared to do any motorcycle ride or hike or any adventure, no matter how easy it is, because I know I'm not as strong as I was before physically.
I've also had mental trauma, and I'm seeing a therapist. Believe me, I'm attacking in many ways. Seeing an EMDR therapist to heal my mental trauma from last year, and working out intensely. I just need to fix my sleep and get in the habit of planning again and also get adventuring regularly again to show my brain that it's okay and that I don't need to be terrified (and also prove to myself that I'll "adventure responsibly" by using safety equipment and not overdo it, etc.).
I'm tired, and I think I'm addicted to YouTube, Reddit, Facebook, doomscrolling, staring at hot girls on IG, playing video games, etc, I just hate it. I feel like I can only think short-term and struggle planning, and I often feel like I'm in "withdrawal" when I'm not medicating with scrolling and whatnot. I think those things keep me up later at night, too.
I'd love to get out again. On a nice hike. Rock climbing. In a cave. Enjoying a waterfall. Cruising on a beautiful road early in the morning with little traffic.
What upsets me even more is that I definitely have the time and ability to do these things, it's just mainly my mental issues and bad sleep and bad planning holding me back. I have a huge list of adventures written out, I know what I want to do, I just have to get doing it more regularly.
Help, how can I get back on track?
submitted by SettingIntentions to DecidingToBeBetter [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:29 nothinglively how do i get this to stop happening to me?

hi, i'm in genuine need of help, i think i may or may not have been hacked. idk if this is the right spot to ask this. if it isn't, please direct me to where i can ask this. i would post this question in the actual youtube help thing, but they hardly if ever respond.
so i've been looking through my search history and have noticed that there are searches there that i have never looked up that are mainly related to pimple popping, disgustingly enough, but also are things such as "dutches outpost", "over the edge", and a few others. i have no idea what the last two are referencing, but the first has me pretty grossed out. my watch history also has videos i have never once seen before, such as random streams i have never watched and yet they appear over and over again in my watch history, and those damn pimple popping videos.
this has happened before, where in probably around 2020-2021 i was having a similar issue, however my search history and watch history was riddled with those videos of adults dressing up as disney characters and making videos intended for children. no one but me ever uses my account. i had logged out of all of the other devices that were listed, and yet it continued. what stopped it was me changing my password to an obscenely long string of characters, and the problem left for a while. i got sick of the old password and changed it into a new and simpler one a bit after, and now 2 and some change years later, the problem is back.
what do i do about this? is this something others have experienced? it's frustrating and weirding me out, because like, it's such an odd thing to be looking up. i'm logged out of every session and device other than my own phone, so how is this happening? i do not believe there is any way someone is going onto my phone and looking this up, so.. how? what?
any help is appreciated. i just want my own youtube account to be my own.
submitted by nothinglively to youtube [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:25 Excellent-Welcome408 Newly diagnosed: Concerning yet refreshing

I was recently diagnosed with IR after self referring to an endocrinologist. It’s nice to finally figure out what’s going on with me but still scary and concerning! How have you all dealt with your diagnosis?
About me: I’m prior military and continue a work out habit of 4-5x/week weight training and cardio. I’ve never met BMI in my adult life but otherwise have been generally healthy with a low to avg BP, great cholesterol levels, no thyroid issues etc.
However over the last 2 years my weight has just continued to creep. My A1C has been trending up but I’m still in the “normal” range 0.1 from being diabetic. I’ve dealt with debilitating fatigue and just recently a MRI revealed an enlarged liver with liver enzymes elevation to match. My PCP blew me off telling me to stop drinking (which I don’t 😒). So I self referred…
I always thought I might’ve had PCOS but just managed my adult acne and hirutism with laser hair removal. But i never had the other symptoms. Now my endo has prescribed ozempic/wegovy and I’m on week 1 of usage. I’m less concerned about the weight loss and more concerned about the internal health factors that it can remedy.
I also want to explore some hollistic methods as well for long term intervention.
It just feels crazy to do “everything right” and still have these problems.
submitted by Excellent-Welcome408 to InsulinResistance [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:25 veilofmiah Is my PSU going bad?

Is my PSU going bad? Randomly loosing port power and video.
I’ll start with specs then the story. (Cheap prebuilt incoming) Windows 10 Home OEM ~ Ryzen 5 2600 ~ Asrock A320M-HDV R2.0 ~ PNY GTX 1660TI 6gb ~ PNY 500gb 2.5” ~ Samsung 980 1tb M.2 ~ Gamdias M1 550W psu (seemingly a no name OEM unit with a fancy sticker) ~ Corsair Vengeance LPX 2x8gb
Focusrite Scarlett 2i2 is the only peripheral plugged in 100% of the time besides mouse/keyboard/monitor
So ive had this pc since about 2019 when it was bought new and never gave problem. It all started with a normal boot up one morning about a week ago, and i notice my audio interface connected via USB didnt come on, i do the ol’ “unplug and replug” and we’re off to the races. Fast forward a couple days, im playing some games, and all my peripherals go dark and off - keyboard, monitor, Scarlett 2i2, mouse stops charging. The “unplug replug” only worked with the USB stuff and gpu was still down, and no fan spinning this time. Pc wouldnt even respond to long pressing the power button. Finally i safely get it shut down, finally today i get brave and try a different outlet and power strip and everything, boot it up, immediately after the Windows lock screen loads, all my peripherals go down again, no picture from gput but the gpu fan spun up to 100%, full leaf blower. Now the only way it stays on properly is to have nothing but the basics connected meaning just keyboard, mouse, and monitor. I have bo way of checking any power readings ive tried ever program i can think of its not even in Task Manager and powershell cant even produce a report on it lol. Could this be a bad PSU or is this possibly a motherboard issue? Could the PSU have damaged the motherboard?
submitted by veilofmiah to pchelp [link] [comments]


2024.05.19 10:19 Major-Ad3831 This meta sucks and the new quests are killing the game for me.

I have absolutely 0 desire to play because the meta is absolutely no fun for me. This is not a problem in itself and has happened many times in the past. Then I did my quests and waited for the next expansion. But the doubling of quests and the constant logging in and rerolling (5x arena/battlegrounds? maybe 10x? neverfuckingever) has taken all the motivation out of it. And I know that some people will say "if you don't enjoy it, quit". But then I won't have the gold for the next expansion and I already know that I'll probably stop playing Hearthstone altogether... Does anyone else feel the same way? Do you have any tips? I'm really close to just uninstalling it...
submitted by Major-Ad3831 to hearthstone [link] [comments]


http://activeproperty.pl/