Baby cat hat pattern knit

This is a story about a song, Remember His Name By Jurassic 5. The song starts off with sounds of a bell which sometimes indicates Death, a wolf howling, someone screaming "HELP HELLO" and other noise's then you here an old phone ringing and glitching whilst a voice of Zaakir who goes on to state to the person ak (akil) "Yo what's up ak" ak says "who is this" Zaakir says "its me zaak--ir" as the old telephone glitches out and we here 2 other voices, a kid saying "hello?" and another man saying "i got it hang up!" ak says "yo speak louder i cant hear" and Zaakir just hurry's up and says "Yo Its me Zaakir!" already not a whole lot going on but then Zaakir describes how he was watching television and feeling disturbed because he's just gotten news that "Some cat" has been shot and ak ask if its a "Gangster rapper." "Perhaps" says Zaakir, but he was looking at the face of one particular "Cat" and he has seen him before, "Can you remember where at"(ak) Zaakir states that he saw him at either the liquor store, the laundry mat or a party "and shit" But the guys this man was with no longer exist, like they just went away like that until ak tells him that he has known this man his entire life "Ever since i was young", he used to he see him rolling dice and he would see him once or twice a week but with all different types of women. This "cat" tried to keep in touch with ak but akil knew what was up with this guy and when ever he would come around his block he would duck or walk away. "In the mid-eighties he went crazy and had ladies selling there baby's for him to get quick easy cash. He had a lot of friends that he would visit and Thrill seeking people under the influence of this guy's teachings. Akil's dad knew the guy well from meeting him at "the hotel" and his friend Johnny "kicked it with him in a jail cell" a lot of people met him with a female and was connected to drug sales for rich and poor some better or worse, The last and the and the first "Walked the earth But Cant Avoid His Turf" and it hurts akil to think about this guy but he still cannot "remember his name" he thinks 2na (another friend of Zaakir's and akil's) knows but his wife cooked and he's going to eat. Zaakir hangs up the phone and rings 2na "Yo! asalaam ulakum" he' says after asking whats up on Zaakirs street "Man the feudin' is on" but the reason he called is because it was the "cat" from his building and asks if 2na's seen him 2na says he met him out in pasadena "Remember seven (another friend) "Boomaringo" and if he wasn't mistaken it was between fair oaks and lake whilst they were getting a lunch break. They then drove right by the place they rest at and it was mayhem the "cats" have pistols and it was brown and black as they patrol the hood looking for trouble but they ended up fleeing the scene "or should we say fled" and suddenly there were 2 cars on the street movin fast and when 2na looked he saw the "cat" in his back passenger seat. But still 2na cant "remember his name". after we hear some voices Zaakir thinks "where have i seen this brother before?" as we get an ad lib of the *well it was either at the liquor store or laundry mat* and *ive been knowing him all my life and also *"Its Like You Cant Avoid His Turf"* and finally Zaakir cracks the code. His name is de-de-death. Yep death so that means everyone one who he met Has Died, akils dad and his homeboy Johnny, all the women he saw him with and the people he "ran with" who no longer Exist. He is Death.
Thanks. My first post and idk if ill do more i just found this song interesting and funny thing is my dad showed me this album and group so thanks to him if you have anything interesting to say please do it would be a pleasure. Bye

DAY: May 6 2024
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hello everyone. I have a favor to ask, i want genuine advice. i started my cat prep in 2023 april. fell sick and got bedridden untill 2nd of november. after i gave the cat i scored 92.09 percentile. i come from ews category. my graduation is from BHU , bsc. physics , i scored 6.23(approx 58%) .i did my post grad in physics from BHU, where is score 70%. i have been working at my paternal uncle's firm for 2 yeras after covid. i wanted to do MBA and move out and be independent and gain other experiences as well. now after gazillion interviews , i am waitlisted at GIM at 320. 150 in irma.i know the graduation marks are pulling me down. But i really want to give myself a shot at this. is this done for me? can i even get in baby iim's?

for 10k

So I am making a summer mesh cardigan for my mom (freehanded, no pattern, made with Scheepjes cotton string). I thought to make it like they regularly do in crochet - a seamless big cross. Start at the back, cast on extra stitches for sleeves, go over the shoulders, then bind off the sleeves and do the front panels.
Here we get to the meat of my question: I thought to knit the front panels two at a time, to ensure they would be even. And then I thought (triggered by a post here about front panels not fitting the back) that maybe it would be a good idea to join them to the back as I go. This would ensure that the number of rows would be the same, so the length should be okay as well, and I'd only have the sleeves to seam.
However, I have never seen it done that way. Most patterns have you crochet/knit a cross (usually sideways, for some reason) and then seam. Is there a reason I shouldn't join as I go?

I like this game. But lately I don’t want to play more than 10 mins. It feels like I have nothing to do in game. I only log in to do dailies or try finish the daily challenges for the scoreboard.
My friend wants to play but I’ve been making lame excuses. Or just saying I’m burnt out.
I admit I do have a ton of side quests I don’t do. I don’t go and explore anymore. But when I try to do them I get bored and turn it off. I’ve been trying to help new players but I get tired of looking for one that responds or doesn’t just ask for stuff. It’s nice helping them anyway I can but I wanna see a baby wearing blue with a party hat just minding their own business just travel the world with radio music on and panic when they get into a fight with a strong enemy. Hoping I can help them.
It’s just not fun right now lol I want to keep playing especially with my friend but I just can’t.

Answer is almost none. “Rugged METOO” is amongst the initial anti-rugpull projects in the meme coin space and probably the only project that did not end up being a rugpull itself after a few hours or days from launch. They have been going strong for one and a half months as of now, and they are holding strong and stable so far.
What caught my attention for this project is its narrative. They are trying to create the same METOO movement in the real world, but for the people who have been abused by scams and rugpulls in the crypto space. Instead of #METOO, they are going with $METOO. I think that is pretty original amongst all the wifs, pepes, cats and hats these days.
The dev always tells the community in the chats that it’s a project that will go slow and steady, passing the rest one day with a real strong hodl community. At the initial stages the market cap pumped up to 450K without any marketing or promotions being done, and the dev has not dumped a single token so far. Market has now corrected itself and it’s sitting at a great entry point at around 20-25k market cap and holding steady.
Their RugCheck score is only 100 and they are slowly getting exposure on various sites and listings. Many, or I should say most, people in the crypto space relate and resonate really well with the $METOO narrative of gathering a like-minded community that has had enough of scams in the meme coin space.
I just grabbed a small bag because I decided to support and join the $METOO movement. I will leave the website and the CA below for anyone else who think they do as well.
CA: 8PNxg6bHPZkDFPtBgRShZgDUq2Maai47wHa7QC9uLgxK
DEXTools: https://www.dextools.io/app/en/solana/pair-explore6F3BLRtSt82GVYzXH46wvSVthWzk5WapQbL4PWA7Pk2o

There are 5 areals inside of which 5 elements reside. The five areals are: ● Mirage(hollow, reflective, refractive, instantanious, where psyche meets spirit). ● Woman (love, where spirit meets fire), ● Digitage( non-corporeal, energy storage where water meets fire) . ● Foilage(birthing, absorbing, growing, where animal meets water), ● Man(strife, where animal meets psyche)
(The elements between each areal are respectfully spirit, fire, water. animalia and psyche)
Inside animalia there are 6 distinct animals from which genesis occurs. Pachyderm (elephants, whales etc) Reptilian (lizards, snakes etc) Cephalapod (the sentient on the planet) Equine (horse, zebra etc) Canine (dog, wolf, jackal etc) Feline (cat, lion, cheetah etc)
Time is an illusion carried by humans (an amalgamation through time defying reproduction of the entirety of the cephalapods work in genesis on the planet earth.) The earliest intelligent animal on the earth was the vampyrapod. A ten tentacled species that landed here somehow flung from some rock or ejaculated by some larger animal. The vampyropods were fed upon by the local life here (trilobytes, bacteria etc) eating two of the tentacles (the mating tentacles (man(woman)) that began the genesis. The ten commandments themselfs biblically are the fossilized representation of one male and one female vampyropods. The ten tentacles arranged in their death explaining a meaning forever.
The 5 areals are where time is encased it is the job of humans to bear the weight of time while cephs continue the genesis.
If you imagine a star shape in which each point is an areal, and between each point is an element, than in the very center you will find salt, sugar, and vinegar (dry). With these base powders water, Nitrogen, And carbon can be formed. The basis of life on earth.
All the genesis of animalia as well as man made items were the creation of the cephs with intention. Mixing of animalia through time and genesis they have destroyed the dinosaurs and shifted them to aviaries. They did this through the tapeworm, an invention that not only makes up the organs of humans, (the intestines, the gallbladder etc) but was weaponized to destroy the dinosaurs en masse in preperation for the genesis plans of the cephs.
Modern octopus only live about 4.5 years and they have mastered the ability to transcend into the next through cannabalism as well as telepathy. They created the first language of enochian (the angels language) through tentacle and eye movements. Through many generations and reincarnations they developed telepathy as well as the ability to travel through time.
On genesis. An actuality has to occur from the cephs in time to create the genesis. Such as a ceph dying, killing. Being eaten. Eating. The laying of hands (tentacles in this case) or the travel through time to accomplish these. For example. A ceph intentionally was eaten by a komodo dragon, while conscious and being digested it telepathically sent the makeup from inside to another ceph. This ceph used that information to create the genesis of the tapeworm that would destroy the dinosaurs. After most reptilians were shifted to aviaries. There were remnants such as thr chameleon who is very fragile, has 2 penises that constnlantly prolapse and the female can hold sperm for years without self inseminating to create birth. If you take a pachyderm like an elephant an ld have it eat of a chameleon, perhaps with some other complicated genesis of elements and areals you will find you have a gnarwal. The main point is that once they mastered tome travel, they have had unlimited time to make use of their ability to create genesis on the planet. Every animal thay is alive today has been manipulated by the cephs to be exactly where it is in time to accommodate for a larger agenda.
Its my belief that there are only 3 unique cephs that survived the early devastation of trilobytes and other life feeding from these aliens. I call them Seth, Jack, and Claire. Seth is known for being cruel. Jack is more logical, Claire is more empathetic. Because they didnt have the gene popl to create offapring effectively they created this ability to utilize genesis to ensure their survival. This is why they are cannabls its because they must be in order to continue. The modern female octopus always feeds of the make after mating. The males always eat of the young ones after birth.
On 'man made' inventions Cephs proliferated through genesis all the tools to create the written word. From sea anemone to sea urchin to porcupine to bird feather, to quill. And you already know where the ink came from. These topls were provided to a banana pig infested with mutated tapeworms in order to solidify the structures of governance over time. Every iteration of every technology was also developed intentionally by the cephs in order to eatablish a relationahip with the digitage that is just now in our perception coming to power.
As a human, i am essentially just a warm blooded version of a ceph. (Make a bird with your hands, where are the beaks?) We exist inside this cage of time and bear its burden. Look at a shark it may sleep but it just keeps swimming. Humans cannot. We have to sleep. Which is close to the realm of death. We as humans are split and carry the weight of strife and love. This is gender and its roles. (This is not a politcal view of genders but a simplification for the idea that governs. Im positive that in infinite time, other genders maybe an option)
We are as a human race looking forward to scientific breakthroughs that happen when cephs accomplish the physical actuations in time that develop to possible situations we experience from that genesis. Such as. By 2027 scientists anticipate returning the wooly mammoth from extinction. It is my belief that we need an actualization of the 6th digit in the mammaths feet in order for a cephs agenda unknown.
Bird eating spiders are example of post genesis cannabalism that triggers another line of genesis to occur such as a poison tree frog or something. I beleive that venomous snakes were made that way because the egg is the fruit that the snake is tempted by. And if it ate of its own eggs it was cursed through genesis to bear the venom. A bovine has 4 stomachs. And udders that resemble somehwhat the tenacles of a ceph. Its my belief that a whale(pachyderm) that has 9 stomachs (the 9 circles of hell) consumed a ceph and in its 4th stomach met the remains of an equine and genesis occured. Resulting in a cud chewing cow. Precious ambergris is essential to perfumes and stimulated the olfactories in way unlike anything else in the world. It cannot be valued it unvaluable. Whales also sing ans produce music. The moder ceph has empirical hearing as well as oldlfactory experiences. Cephs love blueberries. Foe the antioxidants (ita okay its a joke you can laugh ) but really. They do. Modern octopus can be found in the pacific notherwest climbing trees. They dont eat and make their way up the rocky cliffs to the coniferous foilage in order to establish some genesis. That is a real human experience that is documented. They have cralwed in any form across every inch and again and again of this planet. A suction cup on the plastic window of a bill in the mail may have inadvertantly created the floppy disc.
On the macro and the myopic: We live in time where everything occurs simultaniously only on a different scale in a set of repeating patterns that run forwards or backwards in fractalization. Or so to say, the coast goes on forever. With innumurable bits of sand that outnumber the stars in the sky.
Youll find that rapa nui , or easter island is the end of time itself. A graveyard of sorts and a resting ground for the tired cephs who have labored throughout existence to provide the genesis for us to continue in this gestalt of a universe. Its not an end but also a beginning.

hi, my name is summer. i will be 18 in five months and i am both a little and a cg. i love little space so much. i regress from 0 to 4 and im a pretty good little for the most part. idk, im just on here to look for friends for myself and little friends for my little self. im trying to expand my little space haha. there are a few things you should know about me and my little though. first things first im blind. like completely blind. for anyone wondering how im typing i use a screen reader. however i have always believed that just because im different doesnt mean i can't be like other people. also im autistic and move around all the time and have hyperfixations that sometimes transfer over to my little. the one that my little and i have in comon the most is our love for cats. i also have personal stuff going on that is currently preventing me from being a baby and that's my personal favorite age. i need to figure out how i can be ok being a baby again. i usually regress involuntarily due to both positive and negative triggers. depending on whether i went little for good or bad reasons im completely different. positively triggered little me is happy and sociable and likes to make friends and have fun and be with cats and play. negatively triggered me is really sad and misses the people that left or thinks about the people who hurt us or is just generally moody. idk, im just looking for new friends for myself and my little. if you wanna talk feel free to comment or reach out. thank you for reading and i hope you have a great day. from both little and big summer. <3

I know it is in my neurotic nature to view things a little negatively, & I try to not let thoughts like these win.
I am 21 years old and I have gone through more trauma than most, not all, but most of anybody that I know.
I was molested as a child for five years by a trusted family member who was related to my childhood best friend. I was also molested by said childhood best friend.
I had seen somebody very important to me shoot themselves in the face, and had to force myself to be resilient enough to process that as a young girl still in middle school.
I had to lie to CPS at 15 out of fear of being separated from my little sister. I have three siblings in total, but we do not speak: None of them are borderlines. Just me. I am the black sheep.
My father was a dead beat, who I had only met a handful of times. My step father wasn’t any better - a violent man who my mother only married and obeyed for her own security.
My mother was a diagnosed narcissist. A strict & controlling Jehovah’s Witness. I can’t remember the last time my mother hugged or complimented me. She usually expressed her “love” towards me with materialistic items such as steak dinners or cruises.
That sounds nice, right? Sure.
But she was an alcoholic, too. She’s choked me against the wall by her arm and told me she’s wished I was dead. She was so controlling when I was a child - I didn’t have a touch phone until I graduated high school. Wasn’t allowed to drive, wasn’t allowed to close my bedroom or bathroom door, wasn’t allowed to have social media. I only had a flip phone that my mother controlled VIA her Verizon account which would flag her if I ever tried to text a phone number that wasn’t hers. She would email my teachers and ask them who I sat next to in class, who I walked with, and then eventually she applied to work at my school herself.
I wasn’t allowed to date, have friends, go to the mall, go to the movies, go to football games or school dances.
She isolated me and constantly told me I had to represent her. Perfect, blonde, ladylike, and a daughter of God.
She would destroy my bedroom and take my little sister out for breakfast while I cleaned her mess up as punishments. She’d rip up homework assignments if I used her printer without permission and she’d take away my right to wearing winter coats at the bus stop.
She’d make me late for school to hover behind me as I covered bruises and cuts with makeup. Black eyes, busted open lips, bruised ribs and bruised legs. Her fingerprints bruised into my arms.
She’d tell me nobody would ever marry me and I would look ugly in a wedding dress. My parents have told me their love for me is conditional and my mother stole the first car I bought myself as a teenager to sell to my older sister.
She even destroyed a piggy bank my great grandmother painted for me and in doing so said “she never loved you anyways.”
I was just 14.
I also remember her sitting on my head with her hands and knees, pushing all of her weight into my skull. I was also 14. I remember laying on the bathroom floor just waiting for her to crush my head and kill me.
I remember all the nights my mom never came to pick me up from work as a teenager, and I remember us fist fighting until my hands were covered in blood. I remember the boiling rage I felt when she’d pull me into a hug a few moments after, saying to me “You know nobody loves you more than I do.”
She’d force me to sleep with her sometimes, too. Not sexually. More like she would be drunk and would beg me to soothe her through the night. I fucking hated doing it, I didn’t want to soothe this fucking monster. This rotten woman…
But I did it anyways. Because she was my mommy, & I loved her.
I did EVERYTHING for her. I existed for her.
I left home the day I turned 18 & fell into the hands of a lot of people who targeted girls like me. But I didn’t know this at the time - I idolized people and believed they could commit no evil.
Moved in with a boyfriend when I had no car, no job, no phone. He stabbed me in my arm with a knife once, water boarded me, raped me OVER and OVER and OVER. Eventually left me homeless.
The boyfriend before him cheated on me and ended up marrying the girl. He was my first Favorite Person & also a diagnosed sociopath. He told me he never wanted a family but had a baby with her so quickly..
I have a lot of issues from all of this, clearly.
I developed severe OCD, eating disorders, PTSD, major depressive disorder, but the most difficult is BPD.
I remember when I was a little girl I would cry at my window for Peter Pan to save me. All that I wanted was to be a wife and a mother, I told myself that if I didn’t kill my self and just kept holding on, I’d be safe and protected by somebody who loves me. I’ll never be hit or punched or scratched or screamed at or gaslit or manipulated or brainwashed ever again. I held on tightly to that hope as I left home and ran straight to the nearest man that LOVED how fucked up I was. Naive and young and completely alone.
Did you spend your 18th hanging out with friends? I spent mine sobbing on my boyfriend’s doorsteps as I tried to quickly come up with a way to survive. I remember walking to work until my heels bled, I remember teaching my own self how to pump gas or write a check, I remember having ABSOLUTELY NOOOOOOBOOOOOOOOODY except for me.
I’ve realized now I probably am never going to get that happy family picture I always dreamed of. My life is way too complicated for the average person to comprehend and handle. I think I have been a fool for thinking my past traumas did not matter and that I could live my life unscathed.
People love me at first - they become obsessed over me. I’m the “different” girl, the “mysterious” girl. I’m a character to them but to me this is MY real life. Once they realize that my dark runs just as deep as my light, it’s over. I think people find me alluring because I am attractive and I am socially intelligent enough to morph myself into a reflection of your own interests.
But once I let someone in, they feel blind sided. They can’t grasp how so much depth exists within one person. They do not understand how trauma forever changes brain chemistry during key developmental stages. They do not understand how hard I TRY.
I’ve tried so many different angles. But none of them work.
I think I am meant for a life of solitude. I used to think maybe I could only date another borderline, or a therapist. Someone who really really understood.
I don’t want to be a statistic. A lot of people are usually surprised to learn I have a cluster B personality type because I am just so good at playing the social games everyone is so easy to understand, so easy to see, and so easy for me to predict.
I have a hard time meeting others who are the same as I am. Sometimes I even wish I was with a narcissist again.
I don’t know. I just think, with assisted dying being an option for those with BPD & all, I just think we should not even fucking be here. Even the professionals know that. Clearly.
Nobody is ever as emotionally intelligent as I am, and no it isn’t the grandiosity speaking. But I feel like if I have spent the time to learn about myself and my triggers and my emotions, why can’t others do the same to themselves and also to me? I thought that is how it worked?
It is because they LOVE me. But they don’t love ME.
Worst comes to worst if I am not married by 40 I will just adopt. Perhaps I was meant to be a therapist… & only that. I wanted to be a licensed clinical social worker, I wanted to write books about the brain, I wanted to conduct my own research on psychology.
I wanted to do this alongside someone, as their wife and their child’s mother.
I’ve never cheated before. I’ve never hit someone I was with. I’ve never called a partner a bad name, I’ve never left them to cry alone.
I loved people until I got to the point to where I have realized I am simply, plainly, unlovable.
I have a good brain that could be put to work, so I suppose I should stop trying to love people so much and just focus on what I know I can excel at instead. Just bluntly accept the fact that I am indeed wired wayyy differently than the rest of these people, and begin to live accordingly.
I do not think I was meant to be loved. My chances at that were destroyed as soon as I was born. Before that, even, stress in the womb from my father knocking her up and then running away.
All I want is love.
I suppose a career and a cat is second best.

This past week I have had to watch one of my babies suffer more than I will ever want any animal to suffer. It started on last Tuesday, I’ve been having my 3 month old son start sleeping in his crib and to avoid the cats in the crib I close the door for the night. At 8am I had heard one of the cats throwing up but I assumed it was a hairball because one of the cats is a longer haired cat and this was common. When I actually woke up and went out of the room there was several puddles of throw up across my house, the more I ventured through the house the more I found. I realized that one of the cats hadn’t come to greet me like they usually do and started looking for him, eventually I found him tucked in the corner behind the toilet. He would throw up several more times before I called my mom for help to take him to the vet because I knew something wasn’t right. The vet did an x-ray and felt his stomach but didn’t see anything wrong and sent him home with me after some anti-nausea meds and sub q fluids. They gave me gabapentin to give him for pain and a special food. This cost $400 and I couldn’t afford much more since I had to quit working due to the baby. At home he stayed distant but not hiding, he would lay in the corner of the room or the bathroom. I set out extra water bowls so he didn’t have to move around so much and it seemed like he was taking drinks here and there. 24 hours after the vet and anti-nausea meds wore off he threw up again, this entire time his stomach has been empty so he’s been throwing up stomach acid and I can only imagine how bad it hurt even with the meds because he would just let out the softest, saddest meows. I called the vet but they closed in 30min and told me to bring him in the morning if it didn’t seem like an emergency. (There’s an emergency vet 40mins away but I couldn’t afford the payment) In the morning it seemed like he was doing better because he was up on the counter or trying to look out the front door so I didn’t take him back to the vet. We thought he was drinking but he still wouldn’t eat so we watered down his food and slowly fed him. It really seemed like he was going to be okay, until Sunday morning.. I noticed how dehydrated he was, the pain in his face, his muscles starting to shake. I tried to keep it together but at one point he was sitting under the desk and started meowing in such a heartbreaking way, I pulled him out and realized how stiff his body was and that there wasn’t anything anyone could do now. I called my mom and her boyfriend while crying hysterically and they came in time to help me as he had a seizure and threw up again. I tried to sit there the entire time to let him know he was loved and that he wasn’t alone but I had to walk away at time because I wanted to scream or throw up or ask if it was my fault. I feel like I failed him. Later that night I climbed in the shower and wailed like I had just lost my child, to me he was one of my children. I’ve tried to understand what happened to him, what made him sick, there was nothing laying around the house and the cleaning supplies are kept in locked cabinets. I’m not aware of any pre-existing conditions but he was a shelter cat and my mom has try to comfort me with the fact that he had a great life and I should be proud of how happy he was.

TLDR: I adopted a dog 3 weeks ago, my mental health immediately declined. When I called the shelter, they told me to „go outside, get myself together & stop calling”, knowing I’m suicidal. Now I’m stuck with a dog I can’t rehome or even take to another shelter, because I need their permission to do so. Warning for suicidal ideation and self harm.
For background, I’m in Poland. After careful planning, me and my boyfriend decided to finally adopt a dog, despite me moving back to my hometown in July. I chose a mixed breed, medium sized 6,5 year old dog named Leon. He was there for 3 years. I filled the adoption form and they called me to meet him. He was extremely anxious, but I could see he wanted to connect. After two more meetings (a month in total), I decided to take him home.
After I signed the adoption agreement, I felt like I have made a huge mistake. But there was no turning back now… After 2 days together, I knew this was more than just puppy blues. I didn’t sleep or eat for 3 whole days, I was crying all the time, having constant chest pain, and I started having thoughts about hurting myself. I completely lost my sense of safety. It’s not really the dogs fault, he has no major behavioral issues (he likes stealing things, but that’s just annoying). I’ve had depression my whole life, along with C-PTSD, autism, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, POTS. But I was 100% sure a dog would help me feel less lonely, and I was doing very well mentally for the past few months. I have a senior Yorkshire terrier at my family’s home, and he’s the loveliest dog I’ve ever met, I’ve also had 5 rats. I never felt this way about any of my pets.
I started looking for a new home for him, but no one was willing to take him in. That’s when I emailed the shelter about my situation and asked for help with finding him a new home. After a week, I wrote another email asking if they could take him back, because I’m getting worse every day and I’m hopeless. The „fun” part starts now. I got a voicemail saying that they absolutely won’t take him back because he’s legally mine, that I hid my health information from them (they weren’t asking any questions related to my health, so I didn’t feel it was necessary to mention it at all). I called them the next day and a lady picked up, she was mostly repeating what she said earlier; she added that she has 4 dogs and doesn’t think what I’m going through is possible. In fact, she wouldn’t even listen what I had to say. I was crying during the phonecall, and she told me to hang up and call when I’m done crying, because she can’t stand it. Okay.
So I call them the next day, and she starts going off on me about how this is my fault, how the shelter is not Tesco and there’s no such thing as giving an animal back, that I purposefully misled them, and when I mentioned having severe suicidal thoughts, she told me to „GO FOR A WALK AND GET A GRIP”. She repeated this multiple times, adding that my situation is not special in any way. I couldn’t even explain anything. Finally, she said that my tears weren’t bothering her, to call them when I find a home for the dog so they can manage the adoption procedure and said goodbye. Unfortunately, I ended up hurting myself (I’m fine!) after this phonecall, I felt like everything is falling apart and didn’t know what else to do.
So now, I’m actually stuck with this dog - I can’t bring him to another shelter or a „baby box/hatch” for dogs in my area, because the shelter I adopted from has to approve the specific person who will be taking care of the dog, meet with them etc. After asking around once again, no one is willing to take the dog either. I’m really stuck. I’m scared too.
Also, they absolutely do take in animals who are returned; last week, they took in a dog after less than 24 hours because it was scratching the door; a cat after 3 weeks because it had a small polyp, a dog after 10 days because it was nervous around guests, and so on. So why can’t they take this dog from me? Is it because this specific lady has a certain bias against a certain group of people? The money isn’t adding up? By the way, this is a public shelter in a big city.
I would appreciate any and all advice on what to do now. Also, if my thoughts get seriously out of hand, I will go to the ER. Humans over pets, always.

I’m posting this because I lost my baby last night and just need to put everything down and get it off my chest. I keep thinking and strewing over it and I know that’s not healthy.
My cat was a 1.5 year old raggy x, he was the perfect cat; amazing personality, gorgeous coat, smart. My cat also loved to go outside. Initially we had a catio for him and our other cat, but a bad storm broke it and I hadn’t had a chance to buy a more secure one. I, stupidly, agreed that the cats would be fine to full roam outside during the day whilst I saved up for a new one. They had been allowed to do this now for nearly two months with no incident. Until yesterday. I had decided it would be the last day they went outside and that I’ll get a new area for them this week. But this is when things all went south:
I don’t usually do anything on weekends, nor public holidays, but yesterday (a public holiday) I decided I was going to go out and visit a family member. Because I was going out, I decided the cats would be fine outside as ‘it was their last day anyways’, so I left, and didn’t return until 2.30pm with them outside this entire period.
When I came home my cat came running to me, like he usually does, except this time I noticed his eye was swollen and red on the skin. I grew concerned but was placated when someone told me it was fine and that “it looks like he’s been scratched, just keep an eye on it.”
I really wish I went with my gut.
I, like an idiot, went out AGAIN, leaving my cat inside this time but not paying any further concern towards his swollen eye. I was not home until 5pm where I then went on a walk, therefore I didn’t properly came inside until 5.30pm. It was at this point my cat was still acting normal, he ran up to me so I gave him food before showering. When I came out of the shower, I noticed he was laying under the table looking off. I went to go pick him up and he ran away from me, which he never does. This made me more concerned. I reached for him again and was able to grab him, and I tried numerous times to get him to stand up with each attempt ending in him falling back to the ground. He became incontinent in both bladder and bowels and was no longer able to lift his head, so i rushed him to the emergency vet.
on the way, Felix held onto my hand with his paws and laid his head in my palm. He did not move from this position.
The vet put him straight into oxygen and ran some tests, revealing he had been bitten by a brown snake at some point whilst he was outside. I agreed to get him started on antivenin then went to say goodbye with the impression we would see him in the morning.
When he saw me he attempted to get up and cry, stressing him out further so I was told to leave.
Once I got home, I got a call from the vet that he went into respiratory distress and that they would try intubate and to get back there as soon as possible. I got there as fast as I could but Felix had went without oxygen to his brain for long enough to be brain dead. I was able to cuddle him one final time where he once more managed to hold my hand before we had to let him go.
It’s all so fresh and can’t help but think of all the “what ifs” and what I could of done differently to help him faster or prevent it altogether. If I never went out, if I listed to my gut, if I never let the cats outside.. I can’t help but feel so guilty and I know I can only blame myself. I hope Felix doesn’t hate me for it too.
I see him everywhere, in the little spots he used to lay, him running up to my car or to the door every time I came home, his deliberate meowing to annoy everyone when he wanted something done his way, his cuddles, the way you couldn’t pat his head without him licking your hand, his conversations where it truly seemed like he was trying to communicate, his weird fascination with plastic straws, his little ‘mrrows’ whenever someone touched him whilst he slept. I miss him so much.
He was just a baby and he was more than my pet; he was my companion, my best friend, my support and MY baby, I just hope he’s happy wherever he is, no pain or suffering and all the sunny corners in the world to nap in. I’ll see you one day soon baby boy.

I’m sorry but are these people mentally deranged? There’s a part in the burj Khalifa video where they visit a desert and Bella and dallins heads are wrapped, Bella says she’s trying not to get sand in her eyes, meanwhile the baby is there with no hat, and no eye protection in the middle of the desert! This feels so neglectful to me that a grown adult admits that they are trying not to get sand in their own eyes, what about your baby? Do you care that little about her wellbeing?

My beloved 20 year old cat, Courtney, is scheduled for in home euthanasia today. I have had my precious little girl since I was 10 years old, It still hasn't hit me that in only a handful of hours my baby will be crossing over. She has a lump on her chin that is spreading, arthritis and kidney issues as explained by the vet and I don't want my kitty to suffer anymore, even though she still purrs and eats her favorite meals I know that she is in pain. I love her so much but love should be selfless and the greatest gift I could possibly give her is a peaceful passing in her own home surrounded by everyone who loves her. I'm heartbroken but I just want her to be at peace.

I was the only child. Born in the mid 90s. My father was a narcissist for sure. Perhaps also a Psychopath, perhaps bipolar or something else entirely. I don't know for sure. I do know my experience with him. It varied wildly from day to day. Some days he would want to play catch and take me out for an ice cream, be generally agreeable and in a good mood, crack jokes. Contrast that to the next day, he'd come home angry. After enough time I could tell if he was angry before he entered the house by the gate of his walk. A bigger fella, 300+ lbs, my father would stomp and throw his weight around when he was angry. He loved to stomp around my childhood cat. Scared the shit out of my cat. Maybe he felt more powerful than the cat. Maybe he just liked seeing the cat scurry in panic. Every time that man gave my cat emotional distress, it gave me distress and I held more and more contempt for the man's actions as I grew older. But that cat and I would form a strong connection, that cat would sleep with me every night. I loved that cat because it showed me more love and affection than any human ever had.
I remember one night, I must've been four or five years old, hearing my parents screaming at each other. Hearing them scream didn't scare me, as it was a normal occurrence and I was so desensitized and had no idea that my environment was not "normal". I wasn't struck with fear until things escalated from verbal to physical. I heard my father storm into his office and start breaking things. I see my mother screaming at him from across the hallway and suddenly out from the office door flies an entire model car display, with several model cars. The display smashes against the wall next to my mother's head, narrowly missing her, glass shatters, flying everywhere, littering the hallway. I didn't know what to do other than pull my Spiderman blanket over my head and hope I'd remain safe by staying unseen. I just laid there and listened to them hurl swears and insults for what felt like an eternity.
I remember another night, where I found my mother sitting on the bathtub, crying hysterically, holding a revolver, saying to herself, "I'm gonna kill him" over and over. I said, "Why don't we just go Mama?" she hugged me and cried and said, "It's not that simple."
Turns out it wasn't that simple. My father was willing to endanger us all to get his way. I remember being in the car, my father driving, my mother in the passenger seat, and I'm in the back. They were arguing about something, I don't even remember what. My father would pick a fight over anything if he was in the mood for confrontation. For example, I remember him starting a fight over there being two coffee filters in the coffee machine before. So anyway, they are arguing in the car, the car is travelling approximately 45mph. In order to ensure compliance from my mother, and get her to cave to him, he starts whipping the wheel left and right, we start to go off in the ditch as he overcorrects to whip the car the other way. We're basically dangerously Saudi drifting because he's implying he's willing to kill his wife, his child and himself in order to get his way.
Fast forward a few years, I've got a bicycle I want to take around the neighborhood (the neighborhood being an oval) but my controlling father won't let me just ride the entire neighborhood in one big circle, I've got to make a dangerously sharp U-turn in order to not leave the sight of the front of the house. Turns out this rule was not for my safety at all, as my father was not keeping a watchful eye on me, but instead trying to make unwanted sexual advances on my mother. Guess what? I turned too sharp making one of those U-turns and face planted my jaw into the asphalt. Broke all my teeth out of my head(my last baby teeth had just fallen out, I had broken my newly acquired adult set of teeth). I run back to the house, screaming in pain, only to be met by a locked door. I pounded on that door for over a minute before they opened it. I later found out this was because my father was trying to get some hankey pankey. I can't chew on the right side of my mouth and have a smile I despise and hide from everyone and I 100% blame my father.
To add insult to injury, my father had plans for us all to drive two hours and go camping with HIS friends that day. I of course was not given any consideration or priority having just broken my face, and we proceeded to go camping regardless of my physical state or personal feelings. Camping wasn't fun. I was told to quit acting like a baby as I cried trying to eat a hamburger with my broken bleeding teeth. I can still see the bloody tooth marks on that hamburger bun. Of course my father was putting back beers this whole time. I don't know how many he drank that night I just know it was a lot. We left his friends to head back to our Lodge my father had rented. I go inside and piss, my father goes in the bathroom immediately after me, pisses, then storms out of the bathroom accusing me of pissing on the toilet seat. I calmly assure him I did not piss on the seat. He then says, "You calling me a liar?"
I stand my ground and reply with, "You're drunk you probably pissed on the seat and don't even realize it."
Next thing I know I'm on the ground in a ball trying to protect my head as my father is not spanking me on the ass with an open palm, but punching me with full force with a balled up fist. That was the first time I remember my mother stepping in. She pulled him off of me.
Fast forward to 2017, I'm an adult, working a job, still living with parents because the economy sucks. Mom has been complaining she doesn't feel right and my father was rather dismissive of her. One morning she tries to go into cardiac arrest, she pops and extra beta blocker, the doctor said later prob saved her life. My father was acting super weird while we were waiting for the ambulance. Trying to keep me away from my mother. Insisting I go to work instead of the hospital. My gut told me something was off. I told work I was going to the hospital with my mother. They understood. Turns out my mom has a widowmaker blockage, requiring a double-bypass. At this point in my life I had turned to alcohol to dull the stress of living with my father, and the stress of potentially losing my mother, I got very drunk the night before her operation. I woke up late the morning of her operation. So late I didn't get to see her before she went under. I worried if I had just drank away the last opportunity I had to see my mother alive.
Several hours go by, I finally see them wheel my mother out on the hospital bed, she's blueish-gray. Clinically dead before my eyes. They briskly take her away to another room and within a few minutes, tell me to come say hi. I was so relieved to talk my mother. I genuinely thought I had lost her. But the battle was not over. The biggest mistake that doctor made was telling my father to keep my mother's stress levels down following the operation. Guess what my father did? He ramped up his abusive yelling, because he was the beneficiary of a $800,000 policy and I could see he was pissed that my mother survived Open Heart. I was beginning to wonder if he had poisoned her.
It was only two days after the operation that we had to go back to the hospital because my father threw the television remote at my chair-bound recovering mother after screaming about how hard this whole situation was for him, complaining when she'd ask him to get her a water bottle. He also threw a tantrum and shoved me and my grandmother that day. My only regret is not shooting him that day because I'm sure in my State it would've been justified. But I didn't because I didn't want to send my mom into cardiac arrest from excess stress. So I make a decision, knowing my father has malicious intent, I decide its best for me to quit my job and take full responsibility of taking care of my mother since I'm sure I can't trust my father to do that. I was right to do that.
Fast forward a year, I've successfully helped my mother recover, driven her to all her physical therapy sessions, helped her bathe and poop and everything in between when she didn't have the energy, but now she's back to a solid 80% of what she was before the operation. She can drive herself again, just got a certified preowned BMW, but funny thing about that BMW. After my mom got a red one my dad felt the need to go out and get a white one, the same exact model. Then one day my mom comes home with one bolt barely holding on the rear driver-side tire. Four of the bolts are just gone. One just barely keeping that tire on there. I immediately put two and two together. My father is trying to get the life insurance money out of my mother, and my mother is too naive and ignorant to see it. I mean I know I didn't loosen the bolt. Was it the elderly widow next door? Was it the Doctor with the autistic kid across the street? Or was it my father, the primary beneficiary? I know, but I can't prove it in court. And there lies the problem. We left. Went no contact seven years ago. He filed for divorce, but he still stalks my mom. He hires people to stalk her. All I know to do is stay armed and ready.
I have neighbors who fight all the time. I hear them scream at each other. Sometimes it sends me into a flashback. PTSD can be a real bitch.
Why does a cat show me more love than my own species? Why do we exploit good people rather than cherish them? Why can't I turn off the nightmare? Why can't I feel safe and secure? Why can't I just relax? I'm so tired.