I'll admit, I say this from the perspective of a guy going through heartbreaking problems in my relationship, LTR of three years, planned future together, desperate to start renting while both unemployed in the worst housing market in the country in one of the worst job markets in recent times, shit is rough
My relationship was and has been tumultuous, we've broken up before, gotten back together many times, last time was 2 years ago. My gf and I frequently have talks about whether we can move forward together, whether or not I am "reliable", whether or not we are compatible, whether or not I am adult enough to be deserving of a relationship with her, things like that, whether or not I'm someone she can depend on to help her escape her home life, the idea that I'm the one forcing the relationship. From my end, it feels like I'm stuck as a constant therapist, frequently a punching bag, always have to be available, pay for the majority of expenses, have to be the mellow one, and try making myself a sex god basically.
I know how all this sounds, you don't need to comment on my relationship. I've never had a love like this before, I only stated the negatives, not the positives, ditto for her negatives, we are still together for a reason.
The thing I'm wondering is, though, I always see women on here claim that the breakup is always the man's fault, it always comes purely down on him, it's always us, after all, the woman breaks up with us months beforehand, and no matter how much it hurts the man to lose what is likely his only deeply intimate human connection in his life, it's nothing compared to being a woman and being chained to a being that is less perfect than yourself, and also is incapable of providing for you entirely, in a horrible economy.
The thing is, can the man actually save the relationship though? Would you ever let him? If your demands on the man are things you yourself aren't doing can he save the relationship? If he's meant to provide for you when you can't provide for himself can he do it? If he's meant to not only pursue things he wants, but also pursue things you want for you, whether or not he can even afford them is it actually possible for him to save the relationship?
The things my girlfriend has told me often fills me with despair, because the only problems she has that are readily fixable are flaws related to my personality, other things, like wanting me to save her from her circumstances, wanting me to be a 24/7 personal assistant or slave (my gf has regularly told me she wants a 24/7 personal assistant or slave), wanting me to be essentially some dominant alpha guy but also not that simultaneously; basically forcing me to constantly prove my worth and simply put in significantly more effort than her, in addition to already being her therapist, lover, and best friend all in one, I truly don't know if these are things I can do right now. And what makes it worse, once I get another job, once I build up more savings, I can do the things she wants of me.
One thing she resents me for is that I never put as much effort into renting an apartment for us despite having a full time job before I got laid off, the thing is, I didn't put in that effort because only I was working while she is unemployed, we live in a major city with very high rents and neither of us can drive so we can't move elsewhere and most places that are cheap have no jobs anyway; no I wasn't putting as much effort into finding housing for us as she did, not nearly enough, but that was because I wanted to feel fully secure so that if we moved in together our life would not be precarious and we wouldn't grow to resent each other due to the stress of living on edge; but of course her family isn't abusive so I'm not even upset that it just isn't enough for her, but it's like, our original plan was for me to work full time and her to work part time so we can support each other, she herself changed it to just me, and while my last job was higher than average pay, it was nowhere near enough for a secure life in this city.
Sorry if I ranted too much about me, it ain't about me, my thing is, what I wanted to discuss is, maybe in spite of women claiming that the breakup is telegraphed for months in advance or even years in advance, maybe the problem is that what the women are demanding are genuinely more than what the man can provide, maybe the women hold off on the breakup because they know on some level they just aren't actually being fair to their partner, and maybe the men act deeply hurt not because they didn't hear or heed their partner, but rather because they truly believed that love might win out and their partner would love them enough to see what they love rather than pet-peeves they dislike, or even accept that he is trying his best?
I know for my partner, I truly feel I am trying my absolute best. My last job, for all the pay, was extremely exploitative and abusive, it ran on a climate of fear where threats of termination were constant, eventually I myself was terminated, despite this I was always there for her, always soothed her heart and pain, was her constant therapist and supporter and friend and financed all of our dates and if I only had a bit more savings would have financed our lives too, she was and is loving, she's amazing, through my pain and misery she was there for me too, but it's like, what's demanded of me to even be worthy of her love at this point is more than what I can even give no matter how much I want to, and she tells me that she fears a future with me because she thinks I can't plan or finance effectively, and it all boils down to....
I understand her problems and her complaints and my flaws, but yet, how can I singularly save the entire relationship, finance both our lives, completely keep myself together mentally through all this and it's just...my gf sometimes thinks I'm only with her due to scarcity mindset or because I think she's the "best" I could get, but that's not true, I love her with all my heart, with everything within me, she's the only person I want a future with, and the main reason I fear breaking up most of all is, what becomes of all the pain, suffering, and heartbreak I endured? The time and money I invested? The stress? And all to potentially go through that again, with another woman, in some distant future, with even more baggage, and even more of my youth gone?
TL;DR: What if women really do expect too much of their male partners and the man actually cannot save the Relationship no matter how much he tries? What if every expectation met leads only to a higher demand and expectation? When a man has already hollowed himself out almost completely what else can he give to his partner?
Please don't make this about me or my relationship, I'm using my own situation as a comprehensive example, and again, I am reasonable towards my girlfriend's demands, she absolutely does deserve to be provided for, I just don't want to be discarded for something I can't immediately do, and as a mam, I don't think I can actually stop that from happening no matter what I do

For context: I’m (33F) from a country in which we use two last names. Usually, the father’s last name is used first. Up to a few months ago, the law didn’t allow the mother’s last name to be used first. It does now.
I was 9 weeks pregnant when we found out that the law changed and now allows parents to decide which last name is used first, this is my first pregnancy. I mentioned it to my husband who immediately shut me down, he got angry and wouldn’t consider it. I said well, if you won’t hear about it, I should at least have a bigger say when it comes to naming the child; he didn’t like it, but agreed.
A few weeks later we found out that we are having a boy. We had a list of names that we had chosen together. From the list, I said I liked “x” the most. He wasn’t particularly fond of “x”, but later said he liked it, so we agreed to name our son “x”.
To clarify, I didn’t impose, nor made the decision for both of us. I just said I liked “x” the most, and was actually happy when he said he liked it too. He has since told me how happy he is that we chose to name our son “x”, we get a lot of compliments for it.
I’m 26 weeks pregnant now. I have a long list of symptoms that I’ve experienced and am now entering my third trimester, so starting to experience new ones and getting uncomfortable. I will have to go through child birth in a few months, and will be breastfeeding our son after. FYI I’m happy and calm, just acknowledging the physical/mental strain/responsibility that comes along with pregnancy/motherhood.
Husband has been supportive. He has not missed a doctors appointment, took over household responsibilities while I was physically ill (first trimester), talks to baby in belly… what he can do, he’s doing.
As the pregnancy advances, the last name thing has come to mind again. I’d really like to use mine first. Don’t get me wrong, I know both parents’ role is important, but feel women should be allowed credit for the unique role that we have in all this… as it’s my first pregnancy, I wasn’t really aware of the implications when we had that first talk (and yet to fully find out).
I mentioned it briefly to my husband yesterday. He said we have an agreement and that “I” chose our son’s name. So now expects me to hold my end of the agreement. From my point of view, we both chose the name, but he is now saying that he wasn’t fond of “x” and only said yes because of our agreement.
I’m frustrated and sad, such “agreement” was only made in the first place cause he wouldn’t talk about nor consider my request. He’s been first hand witness of my pregnancy experience, and I feel he’s accommodating the name choosing to his convenience, which I genuinely feel we did together.
He’s also saying that I’m only insisting as I have a “fancy” last name (it’s Irish and uncommon here, his is Spanish and “common” for the country). I’ve explained it has nothing to do with that, he’s convinced that it does.
WIBTA to insist?

🪞
Welcome back to the Asylum write-up, where we explore the decade-long slow-motion car crash that is the Emilie Autumn fandom.
Sorry this installment took so long to upload! Just a heads-up, I may take some time to deliver the last one too – these posts take forever to format on Reddit's finicky-ass editor, and my dumb real life is currently keeping me from precious Internet time. Thank you for your patience! You have my word that everyone who pre-ordered the final installment will receive a PERSONAL, HANDWRITTEN letter autographed and illustrated by me, a list of the snacks I consumed while composing this write-up, some exclusive behind-the-scenes secrets, and a pony.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 – Part 4.2 Part 5

Places, everyone This is a test Throw your stones Do your damage Your worst, and your best (...) And if I had a dollar For every time I repented the sin And commit the same crime I'd be sitting on top of the world today (“God Help Me”, 2006🎵)

Quick recap of where we left off. First, there were five to ten halcyon years of pleasant and meaningful interactions between EA and her blossoming fanbase, prominently by way of her official forum. Then, circa 2009-2010, EA's online presence shifted towards sudden anger outbursts, ban-hammering, and an increasingly top-down communication style.
This created a sort of primordial rift within the fanbase, between those who supported EA's right to speak her mind and regulate her own fan spaces however she pleased – and those who thought that her reactions were rude and inappropriate (at best), and that even fan spaces should allow for reasonable, non-abusive criticism of the artist.
Between a poorly-handled book release (see Part 3), the controversial (Part 2) or dubiously true (Part 4) contents of said book, and serious shade from various former collaborators (Part 5), more and more fans had pressing thoughts about EA's work ethic and choices. EA attempted damage control through drastic forum rules that made it virtually impossible to voice any “serious” critical opinion. It didn't work, of course: instead of squashing the mutiny, she created a schism.
Critical fans and active haters started congregating on unofficial platforms.

“WITH MUFFINS LIKE THIS, WHO NEEDS ENEMIES?”: TROLL LIKE A GIRL

So here we were, the early 2010s. The official forum (which had about 700 members in 2006, if you recall) was now thousands-strong, reaching just over 12,000 registered users in 2012 – not all of them active, but still. In terms of sheer numbers and content creation, the party was POPPIN'... but increasingly in parts of the Asylum that escaped EA's jurisdiction, such as Tumblr, where they could speak their mind freely.

You play the victim very well You've built your self-indulgent hell You wanted someone to understand you Well, be careful what you wish for, because I do (“I Know Where You Sleep”, 2006🎵)

In one wing of Asylum Tumblr, a smattering of call-out blogs emerged, which laid out EA's various lies, faux pas, shitty takes, and general deep-seated terribleness in detailed timelines and screenshots (or, short of that, long-winded bullet points). While many such blogs framed it as “serious” whistleblowing and did their best to remain as fact-based and neutral as they could, there was some genuine disgust, animosity and creepiness towards EA on that side of Tumblr; for some ex-fans, “exposing the truth” was mostly justify obsessive hatred, prying and verbal abuse. Some, for instance, felt the bizarre need to side with EA's mother in their estrangement. (One user, with the URL “emilyautumnfischkopf”, argued in a serious and down-to-earth tone - but with zero sources - that EA's upbringing had been nothing but peaceful and supportive until she ungratefully kicked her loving family to the curb for no reason at all. They were later revealed 🔍 to have an alternate handle as “eaisalyingcunt”.)
Either way, through these blogs, a number of potential drama bombs that had mostly flown under the radar were dredged up from over the years – some of which were hard to ignore, even for supportive fans. Where to begin?
There was that nonsense in-joke song, captured twice on camera during the 2009 tour (to very little outrage, at the time), crassly called “Manatee Retard”📺. Or EA's scathing response, in print, to a wheelchair user who found it insensitive that she used a bedazzled wheelchair as a prop to do sexy acrobatics on stage. (“Your offence taken at my hard-won self-acceptance proves that I indeed have something to fight against”, she wrote). Spoken word tracks where she made trivializing knock-knock jokes about serious mental illnesses she didn't have, like schizophrenia and OCD. Multiple instances of calling Britney Spears a “bimbo” and a “Hollywood fucked-up”, resentfully claiming that she only shaved her head because she was “hopped up on drugs” and certainly not because she was “bipolar”, a word the press liked to wield as an insult anyway. (“That's almost like calling someone a retard!” Yeah, heaven forbid.) The meanest, most distasteful paragraphs in the book. Basically everything problematic EA had ever said or written.📝 In retrospect, it had been a long time coming, but it was a lot to take in – and certainly more off-putting, even to less emotionally invested fans, than silly lies about her age and last name.
In another wing of Asylum Tumblr, some fans had had it up to here and just wanted to have fun. 🎵 If Plague Rats had learned one valuable lesson from EA, it was how to crack a joke in the face of absurd tragedy – and the general state of the EA fandom certainly warranted a few.
In 2012, Fight Like a Girl was released. After six long years, three of which had been peaceful, the Opheliac era was officially over. The new album and ensuing tour confirmed that the Asylum had entered a process of glamorous Broadway-style militarization. 🎵📺
The mood board was “Roman general meets Vegas showgirl meets Victorian street urchin”.🪞 The color palette was, to naysayers, “musty pink and rotten, stale piss yellow”. 🐀 The keyword was “REVENGE” (through the power of... self-expression! sorority! brutal assault with rusty medical implements!). The chorus of the title song had an intriguing run-on line about getting “revenge on the world, or at least 49% of the people in it” 🎵 – which seemed like an awful lot, and was widely interpreted (to cheers, boos, or uncomfortable sighs) as a misandrist jab at literally all men on Earth.
The show was essentially a demo version of the musical, in that the setlist vaguely reflected the order of events in the story – but prior reading was essential in order to get what the hell was going on on stage. This one Broadway reviewer had not perused the literature before seeing the show 🔍, and hated: the set, the choreography, the skits, the plot, the lyrics, the music, the concept. (Seriously, you should read the review. It's not even my show and I feel like quitting show business.)
Pre-show VIP encounters, now violin-free, were lorded over by EA's new manager🐀, whose official title was “Asylum Headmistress”. (Interesting choice – she sounds fun!) The swag bags were less substantial than before, and the “greet” part of the meet-and-greet was rarely more than a quick hug and photo op.
On Twitter, EA continued to embrace her “I am very badass” fronting attitude...

Often wonder if cyberbullies r aware they’re fucking w/ a girl who’s BFs w/ maker of the SAW films & is marrying a knife-throwing scorpion. (🐀📝)

...and her taste for needlessly inflammatory statements. About an aisle sign in a supermarket:

If this does not infuriate you, then you're a fucking potato.

(Again with the confounding crypto-ableism, EA! 🔍) She also went through a phase of raging against Lady Gaga 📝, who had stolen her idea of using a wheelchair on stage as an able-bodied woman. 🔍 That failed to convince anyone that she wasn't the histrionic diva that haters made her out to be.
Spurred on by EA's rallying cries and “us vs them” mentality, loyalists turned the white-knighting up to 11. On Twitter, some Plague Rats got into cat fights with Lady Gaga's Little Monsters (what a time to be alive). Others tried to balance out the Tumblr negativity with initiatives like “Spreading a Plague of Love” – a “positive-only” confession blog, whose extreme fangirling, comically drastic rules and hyper-defensive tone📝 did not debunk the increasingly popular notion that “true Plague Rats” were a bunch of authoritarian and hopelessly brainwashed fanatics.
EA truthers and other anti-fans started lashing out at anyone who dared express any positive opinion of EA, solidifying claims that the backlash against EA was just a conspiracy of bitter, hysterical bullies.
All this to say: every passing day brought new reasons for fans to get mad at EA and each other, and everyone in the Asylum was in need of a laugh. It's not easy having a good time.🦠
Leading up to Fight Like a Girl and in the years that followed, user-submission-based meme blogs took off, most notably “Spreading a Plague of Lulz / Troll Like a Girl”. A lot of the early submissions were absurdist humor and toothless, cheezburger-Impact memes (a style that was, oddly, already dated at the time). Those often originated in good fun, and from loyal fans, on the official forum. But there was also true snark, satirizing EA's questionable ethics, outrageous claims, and easily spoofed artistic gimmicks. A new slang of Asylumspeak emerged: Glittertits (slight NSFW), GAGA!!, EA Gusta and all its memeface variants, Get outta mah house!, Are You Suffering?, Fight Like A Goat, [Random celebrity] copied EA (a subgenre in its own right), ...
Most of the “trolling” was directed at unrepentant bootlickers and, to a lesser extent, red-in-the-face haters and creeps. Meme blogs would post joke comments under “serious” or gushing submissions on Wayward Victorian Confessions, and taunt loyalist accounts by tagging them in their posts. When a few people complained on WVC that almost all of the Bloody Crumpets to date had been thin white able-bodied women, and a few fans responded by sharing their dream-casts for a more diverse line-up, the blog was flooded for days with confessions that “X should be a Crumpet” (candidates included RuPaul, Mitt Romney, Nicki Minaj, EA's therapist, and the WVC admins). Farcical shenanigans like that.
Ah, but some people will always cross the line, won't they. EA threads popped up on merciless, bully-friendly snark platforms like Lolcow, Pretty Ugly Little Liar, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Snarkers with a mean streak and obsessive haters mingled in some of the more aggressive, 4-chan-spirited retaliation against EA – which would be called “brigading” in modern parlance. This included flooding EA's Goodreads page with one-star reviews (see part 4), repeatedly editing her Wikipedia page to include her legal name and birth year, and ensuring that Googling said name would bring up current pictures of her.
All of this compounded agitation fragmented the once-united fandom beyond recognition.🦠 Through substantial disagreements among fans, personal bickerings, layers upon layers of inscrutable in-jokes, and cross-platform telephone games, the Asylum morphed into a booby-trapped Escher room.
Satire blogs were taken in earnest. Earnest fan blogs scanned as satire. Memes would get called out as abuse. Appreciation without attached criticism would get mocked as bootlicking. Obvious jokes made by EA would be taken at face value. One divisive confession could trigger days and days of debate, to the point that WVC eventually banned confessions in response to other confessions. New waves of infighting created a confusing web of rival sub-factions🐀, each accusing the others of being toxic, cliquish, and delusional.
The shared fantasy was broken, the collective vision had crumbled, no onez was speaking the same language anymore. Fans would jump down the throat of other fans who held almost identical views about EA, except for that one thing she said or did that one time. Everyone had differing thoughts on what should or shouldn't acceptable to discuss, question, excuse, make fun of.
War is hell.

SCORCHED EARTH SHENANIGANS: HONEY, I SHRUNK THE ASYLUM

Would you tear my castle down Stone by stone And let the wind run through my windows Till there was nothing left But a battered rose? (“Castle Down”, 2003🎵)

Haters vs sycophants is not really the kind of conflict where one side can come out on top (if you're participating, you've already lost). But in the long tug-of-war between “grassroots” and “EA-sponsored” fan spaces, the ultimate winner is obvious – in that the former is gasping in agony, a shriveled husk of its former glory, while the latter... is non-existent. This is due in no small part to EA's tendency, like the Czars of old, to settle conflicts by setting Moscow on fire.🔍)
That's not entirely fair: unlike EA, the czar only did it that once.
By early 2013, as EA was gearing up for her third Fight Like a Girl tour at the end of the year, the official forum was... not as lively as it once had been. Not just because of the stifling rules and disgruntlement towards EA, or because EA herself hadn't really posted anything on there in years; the Internet was also changing, and forums in general were fast becoming passé.
This made it difficult for EA to create a safe space where she could talk to fans, and fans could talk to and about her, in a way she deemed suitable (ie, a space she could gate-keep and regulate enough to keep it completely free from negative criticism). Social media was a minefield; she still posted regularly, but didn't interact very much. So EA and the Headmistress came up with a way to filter out the unbelievers: an official fan club📝, aptly called the “Asylum Army”, with a $100 entry price.
Joining the AA came with a dog tag, a sew-on patch, and a lifetime membership certificate signed by EA and – for some reason – the Headmistress. (Unlike EA's best friend and sound engineer back in the forum's heyday, I don't think fans ever really embraced the FLAG-era manager as part of the Asylum in-group. She came across more as a coordinator / businessperson / adult chaperone, at best.🐀) So, slightly better goodies than you'd get by joining the other AA 🔍 ... but not by much. The main appeal was that members would have access to exclusive content, special merch, giveaways, early bird tickets for future shows, and regular video chats with EA.
The concept itself drew a fair amount of criticism, as you can imagine. Between the name🐀, the price, and the inherent gatekeeping of a pay-to-join fanclub, many balked at the monetizing of a concept that had once (like, three years back) been significantly more DIY, grassroots, and inclusive. 📝🐀
Then again, many also longed for a positive, drama-free space where fans could just be fans. And while the creation of the AA was generally recognized as a quick cashgrab, a lot of people were surprisingly cool with it. EA was trying to finance her dream musical, after all – although a number of fans wished she had gone about raising funds in a less sketchy way.
So around 400 fans shelled out (which, according to the Headmistress📝, “basically cover[ed] the cost of running the fanclub itself – keeping the database up, website, etc.”). Enough for a close-knit, but sizable community. But already, there was a conflict of interest: a high fanclub entry fee essentially demands that you pledge loyalty to the artist over loyalty to your fellow fans, who wish to join but can't afford to. Sharing, caring, and ensuring no one felt left out were some of the more positive values cultivated in the fandom... but leaking exclusive content would surely piss off other paying members🐀, and make EA feel betrayed all over again. (And she had barely just started to mellow out on social media!)
...But then again, this is the internet. After the first month of secret AA drops (lyric sheets, some photoshoot outtakes – nothing too juicy, really), there were, yes, some leaks. EA was predictably miffed, and retaliated by... ghosting the fanclub for weeks at a time in its first few months of existence (great look!). She eventually found the “solution” to her problem, by providing something you couldn't right-click-save (and which had been part of the promised perks to begin with): live interaction.
Over webcam, she was her usual in-person bubbly, charming, funny self. Everyone seemingly had a good time during the fanclub video chat, and this gave people faith and hope.
There were a few more events, giveaways, etc. As promised, ahead of the fall 2013 tour (the last one to date, it would turn out), AA members got priority access to show tickets and VIP bundles. The latter were much pricier than before, and only included soundcheck, a photo-op, and three goodies: a tin of loose-leaf tea, a signed printer-paper setlist, and a small flag that said “F.L.A.G.”.🔍 Some stuff continued to leak – but, as some of the outlaws pointed out (scroll down to the Disqus comments), they were mostly relaying information that was relevant to the entire fanbase, such as updates about ongoing projects (the dragged-out recording of the audiobook, for one).
In early 2014, lifetime memberships were closed, and replaced with monthly, quarterly and yearly subscription tiers. Bizarrely, you ended up paying $3 more per month if you bought a $99 yearly subscription📝 – but it did include the patch, dog tag, and piece of paper!

Sometimes I kind of want to be part of the cool kids and register to the Asylum Army. Then I remember how it came about, what you could get for the same price a couple years ago, how the whole thing was and is handled, and that I won’t support any of this bullshit. (And then I roll around naked in all the money I’m saving.) (🐀)

Still, a number of fans rejoiced at the affordable monthly option, and joined – if not for the exclusive content and merch (which were... okay, but not much to write home about), then for the friendly, drama-free exchanges with an artist they actually did love, in spite of all the frustration.
For the still-too-poor or still-undecided, there was always the forum! It wasn't as active as it used to be, but a few die-hards still managed to keep the lights on... until, inevitably, Someone Did Something and Ruined Everything. (Once again: EA's wrath is spectacular, but rarely completely unprovoked.) The incident features one notable figure in the Asylum community. Let's call him the Collector.
OK, so maybe you remember the meme I linked to in Part 4, with Christian Grey and the ginormous EA hoard. Well, that's the Collector's collection. The “Violin” promo that I called the "Holy Grail of the fandom" in the same paragraph? Also his. The handwritten lyrics that went for $940? Guess who won that auction. Over the years, the Collector had probably spent five figures on EA merch and shows, and although that fact was a little unsettling, he was a very active, easy-going, and generally well-liked fixture of the fandom.
One day in 2012, shortly after the Headmistress had replaced EA's old Chicago BFF as main forum admin, the Collector's account got banned or restricted over something dumb. When the ban wasn't lifted as quickly as he hoped, he took it... the way one takes things when one is unhealthily invested: he started spamming Headmistress and the mod team with increasingly rambling and abusive emails (lost to time, probably for the best). When that didn't work quickly enough, he tried a different route.
One of the many auctions that the Collector had won, some years prior, was EA's old iPod Touch📝 – which contained all of her favorite tunes and, buried somewhere in the data cache... a phone number. Which the Collector tried calling. And wouldn't you know it: EA picked up. She congratulated him on his sleuthing skills, listened patiently as he made his case, apologized for any distress caused by the unfair account restriction, and then they got married.
Kidding! She freaked the fuck out, hung up, and banned him for life from the forum and all EA shows and events.
After his ban, the Collector allegedly still tried to attend at least one VIP pre-show (one source in the comments says he was allowed to buy some merch, refunded for his ticket, and escorted out). He joined the Reform forum to bitch about EA and try to rally people to his cause, possibly made revenge posts about her on darker snark forums, and continued to hound the Asylum mod team. So in June 2014, EA came up with a radical and unexpected fix to the Collector problem.

The official Asylum Fan Forum has been shut down permanently. I have personally paid thousands of dollars each year to keep the forum safe and secure for you ... Unfortunately, the forum has not been kept safe and secure for me, a truth which disappoints me greatly, instead becoming a place where people who have physically threatened myself and my staff prey upon forum members, pressuring them to contact me and my staff on their behalf. If the gullible wish to humor my stalkers (who live in their parent’s basement at age 30 something) and thus put me in danger, they may do it on their own dime. They may also fuck off, because stupidity can kill, and I won’t be your victim. To those who enjoyed the forum, you know who to thank for its closure. (“On the closing of the Asylum Forum”)

Voilà! This is how a decade-long archive of shared history ends: not with a bang, but with a dirty delete and a sod-off communiqué.
The obliteration of the forum took everyone by surprise...

I was actually on the forum when it was taken down. I was navigating between posts and when I went to click on a different board, an error message came up. I honestly cried a little, I'm not ashamed to say. (WVC admin on Reddit, 2024)

...and I do mean everyone:

Chicago BFF / ex-admin, the next morning: Whoa, EA forum shut down? Ex-mod: It turns out that if someone spends enough years actively “waging war” to destroy what they can’t have, eventually they’ll be successful. * eye roll * Not even mods got prior warning. Just all the sudden, poof, gone. BFF: Really? She did not let the moderators know?! This is sounding worse and worse. Uggh. I’m so sorry. Such a loss. (...) Ok, threats are serious, but why not just put it in archive mode so no one can post? (...) Sad. I shall light a candle in the forum's honor. (Facebook posts; scroll down for screenshots)

It was a gut punch, especially for people who had poured countless hours into the community, or could have used some prior warning to save years of their own writing from the role-playing threads. One last chance to take a look around the place that had meant so much to so many.

From the wording of the announcement of closing the forum and a number of other things, it sometimes seems like EA doesn't like her fans much. :/ (🐀)

Three months after the forum was nuked, Battered Rose (a venerable EA fansite, which had been around since the Enchant era and had one of the most complete EA galleries online) announced that it was shutting down too.📝 The admin, who had also been a long-time forum mod, cited a lack of “time, energy, passion, or money” to keep the website going... and being upset at the sudden disappearance of the forum. It was, truly, the end of an era for the Asylum.
...Well, no point in living in the past. For those who could afford it, and still wanted to talk to/about EA after that (not everyone did 🐀), there was always the Asylum Army fanclub!
Over the summer of 2014, EA held regular live chats and Q&A's, and... many attendees really enjoyed them, and thought the AA was well worth the money after all. She also quietly parted ways with the much poo-pooed Headmistress around that time.

Just spent over 4 hours giggling, drinking tea and playing guessing games in chat with EA and other Asylum Army members ... No griping, no downers, just lots of fun. I think I like the way the ‘new fandom’ is going and now I’m really glad I finally decided to join the Army. (September 4, 2014🐀; Battered Rose had closed the day before)

The forum was lost forever, but perhaps that was a chance for a fresh start. Could this fanclub thing really be the Asylum Renaissance that fans had been longing for?

...I have come today to a very difficult but necessary decision, and that is to discontinue the Emilie Autumn Official Fanclub. The site itself, and the community chatroom, will remain open to you indefinitely, but I will no longer be making updates to the site. (Newsletter, September 8, 2014📝)

...Never mind, then.
Turns out the fanclub had been the Headmistress' idea all along. EA had been reluctant from the start, and although she really enjoyed the live chats with a safe community of people “who are there for the right reasons”, she couldn't overcome her fundamental discomfort with the concept. Lifetime and regular members would receive a bunch of digital downloads and a -35% coupon on the Asylum Emporium for their troubles. EA said she would definitely pop back once in a while for live chats, for free, just for fun, but to my knowledge, she never did.
And so the most devoted fans were left standing in the rain...

She is happy, she made it. She is fulfilling her dreams, found love and happiness after all the pain. I understand that she now doesn’t need “us” anymore ... That doesn’t change the fact she broke my heart with taking the Asylum Army and the forum from me. Yet, I am happy for her. (🐀)

...while naysayers pointed and laughed, Nelson-style.🦠

I don’t feel sorry at all for the people that paid for the Asylum Army fan club. Most of them knew that EA is an atrocious business woman and has broken many promises before. In fact, I laugh at them. They seriously thought that EA would actually stay consistent with this? (🐀)

EVERYTHING MUST GO: THE ASYLUM WHOLESALE

EA fans were left without an “official” home for about three years. This gave them plenty of time to be annoyed at EA for: not releasing the audiobook on time, not materializing any new project for a while... and the new sin of peddling random, ridiculously marked-up AliBaba jewelry as “merch” on her official store. Think faux-antique cameo pendants and $30 Big Ben rings (...because the Asylum story is set in London, get it?).

The whole accessories section looks like a tacky overpriced English souvenir shop. (🐀)

The fanbase lost a lost of steam in those in-between years, because there wasn't much to stick around for. As evidenced by the positive reception of the AA live chats, even in the midst of unresolved drama, out-loud interactions in a friendly environment have always been EA's saving grace. Considering the amount of online hate, there are shockingly few accounts of bad IRL encounters with EA: most people say that in live conversation, she comes across as a fun, warm, and genuinely sweet person. Some report that their negative opinion shifted after meeting her.
But there were no chats or live shows anymore. There was only social media, where she ignored questions and vague-posted about overdue projects – and the newsletter📝, which was all saccharine love-bombing to promote bland dropshipped trinkets. For fans who remembered the handcrafted merch (and two-way communication) of the early years, it was a bitter pill to swallow.

CONTINUED IN COMMENTS

​

Admittedly, there is something inspiring to watch, read, or hear about how warriors overcame sheer obstacles, fought with their weapons and armor (which I do admit that I do find intriguing), fought as units, and conducted themselves around people. Unfortunately, the reality of the warriors chosen to be represented as benevolent is anything but. Throughout history, they have things that would now be deemed as absolutely atrocious, if not evil. Murdering defenseless peasants (such as over mere insults, even if they were justified), forcing themselves onto women, etc. And yet their crimes are whitewashed to depict them as heroes.
Now, I am aware that I am supposed to not look at it from a modern lens as values differed between times and places. And to an extant, I can understand certain things that were seen as good or at least required. For instance, I can somewhat understand why gender roles were valued as many men and women worked through division of labor (i.e. one party taking care of one thing allowed another to focus on something else). However, there are still some things that I just cannot accept. People could still feel things like empathy, compassion, fear, hate, love, and just any other human emotion. A warrior could still feel for what others are going through or what they may go through. He could still respect the sanctity of life of people in general. Yet many choose to look down upon and murder the defenseless such as during sieges (it'd be one thing if the peasants were trying to kill. It's another if they are helpless yet are cut down or tortured). In fact, many were even needlessly sadistic such as what they did with women (I will never, EVER empathize with such predators). Also, even in those times, it was recognized that things such as sexual violence were looked down upon. For example, the Bible lists lust as a deadly sin. Yet that didn't stop knights from doing that during warfare. So even though it was seen as wrong, people ignored it when it became inconvenient.
Also, the idea of them having warrior codes like Chivalry and Bushido is also a more modern invention. There were no unified rules that stressed good behavior such as protect the weak. At most, there were a few general rules such as follow your lord, but hardly anything about how to treat people with respect. Those came after their heyday.
Now, I also know that there were rules when it came to some of these deeds. For instance, a samurai cutting down a peasant through kirisute gomen had to have a witness to testify whether or not the warrior was "defending his honor". If there was no evidence that he was insulted or provoked, he could be punished severely. But still, it is disproportionate retribution for a armed man to wound/killl a person for something as petty as a rude remark. It'd be one thing if the peasant (during war or in a civilian setting) was threatening a warrior or, worse, his family, so it makes sense to strike in self-defense. Hell, I could even understand a slap or punch in the peasant's gut. It's another when a working class member is not able to lay a finger yet is struck down. In my opinion, this is the biggest form of cowardice.
Just to clarify, my main issue is not us talking about warriors like samurai and knights. Rather, it's how they are depicted as noble heroes to look up to. It'd be one thing for a documentary, story, or anything about them showcasing what they were, pros and cons and all. For instance, Akira Kurosawa depicts the moral grayness of feudal Japan, including samurai. In Seven Samurai, the peasants fear the titular group because, as Toshiro Mifune's character ranted about, the warrior class has done all sorts of f-ed up crap to the commoners. But what is done instead in many works is that artists strip away the stuff we consider bad and present them as our modern idea of heroism.
Can you imagine this being done with modern armies or groups that we deem as utterly reprehensible? $hitler and his goons, putin and his cronies, etc. One argument that I've seen is that ancient warriors so long ago that those affected are not around. But if that's the case, can you imagine the reprehensible modern armies becoming romanticized centuries to come? Scratch that, it's already happening with people like neo-n@zis, which just makes things more convoluted.
I'm sorry for my ranting. The thing is, as someone who cares about people, no matter how long ago it's happened, I feel for those who suffered harsh lives. So many people worked back-straining labor and providing foundational needs for their societies. And yet such people were looked down upon and cruelly treated. And despite that, their oppressors get to be the ones romanticized, which saddens and infuriates me.

my brother and my mom were arguing, i feel like vomitting, i butt in saying you say a lot for someone blah blah, he started punching my head but we were in the bedroom while arguing and i was in bed, he came closer and i knew he was going to hit me so i put a thick blanket over my head in fear and he started punching me but then got pulled away from my mom, that was tolerable but then later after a few minutes i didnt say anything but they were arguing, he suddenly got over me and i put the blanket over me and he started unching me with his fists but so much harder, i screamed out so loud and my head hurts, my dad came back home and deal w him, and says he cant hit women let out weak people, and anyone in general, he then said to my brothet that he wont have guts to beat someone much bigger than and called him weak an pathetic and wtv, he locked himself in the room, me and my brothwe were nnever close, he has always beaten me up but i swear im shaking my head hurts so much i felt his fist hit my head, hes about to turn 18 in june and im so much younger than him, i swear im not lying it hurts so bad my head and i feel like im gonna vomit, my hands r shaking, i wanna throw up, i felt his fists and i screamed so loud, we live in a duplex, we have neighbours and stuff, he hit so hard idk what to do, i was catching my head after he pulled away from my scream, it hurts so bad i hate this so much. it hurts so much and hes so mean to me, always calling me ugly, a bitch and what not. i hate it and i dont know what to do. my mom blamed me for screaming while my dad took my side and took care of it when he came back, it still hurts my head i feel like im gonna throw up or at least i wanna throw up. and im a girl whos 45 kgs, hes around 70 or something and maybe 80, im 5'4, hes 5'11. i feel so dizzy.

When I was 16 I was groomed by a non-blood relative.
In the past 5 years I have gotten in several fights and have gone too far physically/verbally on several occasions.
I have trouble forming relationships with women and have substance abuse issues.
I’ve been to therapy and have tried quitting substances but always find myself back to them (100% on me and lack of willpower).
I just feel hopeless. Today I was punching a brick wall after an especially frustrating/disappointed in myself night.

I have always lived my life with a strategic mindset, naturally as someone who was physically slower than others I had to know where to be & when. Thus being on time isn’t a habit of mine, although I’m extremely organized & plan my life meticulously. When I was 18 I dropped out of school to pursue business & rose to be the right hand for the company I work for. I have always described myself as feeling like Darth Vader kneeling before the Emperor ready to do his bidding when I’m with my boss. Thinking of it that way always made me feel badass, & I thought I was cool. I’m not, I’m a fucking joke at 24 years old. I now describe myself as Sheddar from the 87 TMMT & my boss is Krang. The only difference is that my boss is a brainless body not a bodyless brain. Everything I’ve done, has been in attempt to overthrow the power & become the one in charge while helping my boss into retirement. This way I can move up the social ranks in life. What saddens me is I feel I’ve grown intolerable to myself & others. I know those around me only gage conversations for either a reaction & entertainment or for business. I’ve noticed this in my family & friends too, I’m unable to socialize with people & women are afraid of me. I have accepted the fact that I’m a shitty person & I know people would dispute that since I’m capable of & do the right thing, but there is a big difference. To me good people are desired for their company, thoughts, & skills; I don’t have that, the only time my skills are desired are during business hours & I have failed to & can’t understand how to build relationships outside that anymore. I’m a fat ugly piece of shit who’s frustrated with himself for letting 24 years pass with nothing to show for, be proud of or fall back on. I don’t want to die a lonely virgin because I don’t know how to communicate properly & need time to myself to process things emotionally. The industry my company is in, is collapsing; I’ve already enrolled in school for the fall, but I just don’t see this going well anymore. I’m no longer confident in myself, I used to be an arrogant prick & now lay in the bed I made.
As Yabushige from the latest Shogun put it “My dead body
Don’t burn it, don’t burry it, just leave it in the field
& with it, fill the belly of some hungry dog”

I gotta post some things right now before they get fuzzy
When it tried to talk to him he was weirdly aggressive, playing with a knife while talking with his shark eyes and anger This is some weird shit he's done before. As well as opening a knife drawer and telling me to make sure e I can reach.
He's slammed the table, the steering wheel and the dashboard in front of me.
Told me this last episode when he was saying he would "fuck me up" that I don't "train" and I'm not tough...as if I should need to be???
Told me over and over that it's my behavior and I need help. That i am a narcissist and insane
That he is just playing mentally ill to get state money and how dare I use it against him (when I told him he wad splitting)
Lied to the therapist about saying he should punch me and then smiled about it when I called it out later
Told me ther therapist said it was okay to threaten me because he didn't hit me - she did not
We were walking and he made some comment about where and how I was walking, as if not near enough to him
Gets seriously weird when we are in a crowd or at shows paranoid thinking idk what, but something about the men around us and me And also when I watch other bands play....
Driving in hawaii started to get weird about me "looking around" has done this many many times
Ofc he thinks the world is flat and the sky is not real.....so there's that
Has no job and no real prospects. Because he hates the idea of work and additionally because they garnish him for 30 year old child support
He talks about beating up his ex wife cuz she supposedly gave him an std with absolutely no remorse and has no compunction about women being abused, he in fact says No one ever talks about what she did to cause it...when the issue comes up on TV or wherever
Yeah, he's a winner alright 🙄 Jolene says you can have him.....and so do I

We see a magical monster jump around a bloody building happily. It seemed extremely happy as it found the manager of the building who threw things like pencils, papers, and a chair at it but nothing in the office could harm this creature.
Creature: Nehehe! Kahahahahahaha!
Manager: HELP! HELP MEEEEE! HELP ME NOW!
The creature went to grab the man but its arm was cut off at impossible speeds. It gasped in shock. Even the man couldn’t tell what happened as he looked around the room and saw an older woman.
Woman: Heh… monsters like this have been popping up a lot. Tell me assassin what might be the cause?
The creature would regrow its arm and send a raw blast of pure mana at the woman who would easily step out of the way. A woman in a white multi-layered kimono with black hair appeared behind the monster and stabbed it through the throat.
Creature: NEGHEGharajafa!
It turned into dust being easily killed by the black haired assassin.
Assassin: I presume it’s the work of a servant and or master.
Woman: That’s correct! Good job!
Assassin: So you already know the cause behind this?
Woman: Correct! I even know the servant and master responsible!
Assassin: Alright then…
Manager: What’s going on?! What’s happening?!
Woman: Assassin.
Assassin: Yes master.
She threw her dagger into the manager's skull killing him in an instant. Assassin sighed at her order and the kill. She picked up the dagger before placing it back within the scroll she normally used to conceal the small blade.
Assassin: Master who did this?
Woman: I'm not telling~
Assassin: Ugh… fine then master.
The two women walked out of the office building the master smiling brightly.
Woman: Hmm… I wonder what Saber’s master is doing?
Assassin: Is he of interest?
Woman: I knew his father! Would you be a dear and spy on him for me assassin?
Assassin: As you wish master…
Assassin bowed and quickly disappeared leaving the woman all alone as she laughed to herself.

Leo was reading a comic book while lying on his busted-up blue couch. He didn't have a single thought on his mind aside from the words and the images placed on each page.
Just then Ky walked into the room with an immaculate keychain in his hand. He held it up and passed it towards Leo who grabbed it as it flew above his head.
Ky: Here it was made back in Japan’s Heien Era.
Leo: What is it?
Ky: A cursed chain. While you have low mana it converts the lack of mana you have into physical strength. Therefore-
Leo: I can be super strong!
Ky: Basically. Just keep it in your pockets. I had the pull a lot of strings to get this from my sensei.

Elegant: You want it? Beat Shine in hand to hand! No powers just skills!
Ky: HOW AM I MEANT TO DO THAT?!

Ky: Ugh…
Leo would shove the chain back into his hoodie pocket. He gave a bright smile and placed his comic book down crossing his arms and leaning over the back of his couch.
Leo: So! What is the plan to win this war?
Ky: We need to get you trained up preferably. And we need to exterminate every master in the war.
Leo: Can’t we just… let them all kill one another and pick the last guy off?
Ky: Nope. Most likely they'll come for you while you try this strategy anyway. Even worse is the possibility the final master and servant standing could be an extremely bad matchup for Saber.
Leo: I guess you're right…
Ky: Now then… GUNPOWDER!
Guns appeared behind Ky who shot at a wall next to the bullet manifested the black-haired assassin servant.
Ky: Assassin!
Leo: Oh shit!
Ky’s technique is “Mental Recreation” This powerful ability has him use up his mana to create objects based on certain topics. These topics are gunpowder, transportation, death, nature, and war. These objects are limited to what Ky subconsciously associates with these words whenever he hears them. He can summon these objects with a hand sign or by saying the topic of origin. However, he can not create actual life. But his technique is based on his own interpretation. So if learns to interpret his limits differently his technique will respond in kind!
Ky: Death!
Skeletons appear from the floor but Assassin cuts both their heads off in a moment using her scroll.
Leo: Woah… she's fast…
Ky: If I had to wager a guess… I would say she's faster than Saber and closer in speed to Lancer.
Leo: You can tell that just by her attacking once?!
Ky: I am good with my eyes…
Leo: Saber!
Saber from the front porch came rushing into the living room switching from her casual clothes to her armor and pulling out her misty blade ready to fight.
Assassin: It would seem I'm outnumbered.
Ky: Wow she can even count!
Leo: Why are you even hear?
Assassin: I am here solely on orders from my master. I have no intention of fighting but if you force me to…
Leo: Oh fuck that!
Leo went to punch her in the face and Assassin ducked under grabbing him by the throat and personally slamming him through a wall the sunlight now radiating through the hole made within the wall.
Ky: Gunpowered!
A canon ball appeared a mere 2 inches from Assassin’s face and the second the canon shot she managed to dodge out of the way within an instant. She ran up and shoved the scroll into Ky’s shoulder stabbing through and making him bleed as she jumped onto the coffee table.
Ky: Damn it… some kind of concealed blade…
Saber: I don't wish to destroy Leo’s home… but I want to take out Assassin as soon as possible!
Saber sighed and rushed forward at incredible speeds that still were outmatched by Assassin who managed to dodge each slice of her blade before kicking Saber in the gut before roundhouse kicking her in the face sending her into another wall and cracking it.
Assassin: Strong as you all are I'm simply too fast for you all.
Leo then just grabbed a potted plant in the corner of his room as she wasn't paying him any attention and hit her in the back of the head with it stunning her so Saber could get back up, run, and stab Assassin in the shoulder.
Assassin: AHHHH!
Assassin cut Saber’s arm and elbowed Leo in the face before running out of the hole in the wall she made earlier.
Saber: Master!
Leo: What did I say about calling- actually I do not care…
Saber ran towards Leo who'd been sent to the ground on his ass. He seemed fine as he stood up holding onto Saber.
Leo: I am fine don't worry ok?
Saber: If you insist master! But should I give chase to Assassin?
Ky: Would not recommend it. She's clearly highly skilled. Even if you are probably stronger than her chasing her down might be a bad idea.
Leo: Yeah what Ky said! But what am I gonna do? Am I not safe in my own home now?
Saber: I'm afraid it seems you are not Leo…

Assassin walked into a large mansion on top of a hill and entered a bedroom.
Assassin: Master!
The woman turned to her with a sly grin pasted upon her face. She was currently sitting on her wooden chair while writing something in a notebook.
Woman: Assassin!
Assassin: I am afraid they spotted me rather quickly.
Woman: Did you kill any?
Assassin: No master…
Woman: Perfect! I don't want them to die before they know my name… Isda!
Assassin: Why?
Isda: That is for me to know Assassin! Me and me alone!

Gilgamesh sat upon his throne. Among all masters and servants in the holy grail war, he alone stood as the honored one. He viewed through on of Pat’s crystal balls the events that transpired between Assassin and Leo’s group.
Gilgamesh: That Saber… she's quite strong. Even with the master holding her down. And the Assassin is quite boring to me.
Pat: A-Archer-
Gilgamesh: You know nobody is watching us use my true name peasant!
Pat: Forgive me Gilgamesh! But why are we sitting in this pocket dimension?!
Gilgamesh: Simply to protect you from getting killed. You are quite weak and well I won't have any fun if you die. Even I can't sustain myself without a master!
Pat: O-oh I see…
Gilgamesh truly was a king!

I don't need any Sony Buff passes or Universal Rewards.
●**Movies Anywhere**●
•**(Bundles)**•
•**Alfred Hitchcock Classics Collection Volume 1 (4k) (4 Movie) (One Code)**
1: The Birds (4K)
2: Psycho (4K)
3: Rear Window (4K)
4: Vertigo (4K)
•**Best of the 2000's 10 Film Collection (4K/HD) (One Code)**
1: A.I.: Artificial Intelligence (HD) (10-Film)
2: Best in Show (HD) (10-Film)
3: The Departed (4K) (10-Film)
4: A History of Violence (HD) (10-Film)
5: The Hangover (4K) (10-Film)
6: I Am Legend (4K) (10-Film)
7: Letters From Iwo Jima (HD) (10-Film)
8: Mystic River (HD) (10-Film)
9: Ocean's Eleven (HD) (10-Film)
10: Pan's Labyrinth (4K) (10-Film)
•**Halloween Trilogy (4k) (One Code)**
1: Halloween (2018) (4K)
3: Halloween Ends (4K)
2: Halloween Kills (4K)
•**High On Your Watch List 8-Film Collection (HD) (MA) (One Code)**
1: Due Date (HD) (8-Film)
2: Friday (HD) (8-Film)
3: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle (HD) (MA) (8-Film)
4: House Party (HD) (MA) (8-Film)
5: Inherent Vice (HD) (MA) (8-Film)
6: Project X (HD) (MA) (8-Film)
7: Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny (HD) (MA) (8-Film)
8: We're the Millers (HD) (MA) (8-Film)
•**Men in Black Trilogy (4k) (One Code)**
1: Men in Black (4K)
2: Men in Black 2 (4K)
3: Men In Black 3 (4K)
•**Meryl Streep 8-film Collection (4K/HD) (MA) (One Code)**
1: Death Becomes Her (HD) (8-Film)
2: It's Complicated (HD) (8-Film)
3: Mama Mia!: The Movie (4K) (8-Film)
4: Mama Mia!: Here We Go Again (4K) (8-Film)
5: One True thing (HD) (8-Film)
6: Out of Africa (HD) (8-Film)
7: Prime (HD) (8-Film)
8: The River Wild (HD) (8-Film)
•**(4K)**•
1917 (4K)
2 Guns (4K)
Abominable (4K)
**The Abyss (4K)**
Aliens (4K)
Ambulance (4K)
American Gangster (Extended Edition) (4k)
Annie (4K)
Ant-Man and the Wasp Quantumania (4K)
As Good As It Gets (4K)
**Avatar: The Way of Water (4k)**
**Avatar: The Way of Water (Collector's Edition) (4k)**
Avengers (4K)
Backdraft (4k)
Battleship (4K)
The Batman (4k)
Big Hero 6 (4K) (MA Split)
The Big Lebowski (4K)
Black Hawk Down (Theatrical & Extended) (4K)
Black Panther Wakanda Forever (4k) (MA Split)
Black Widow (4k) (MA Split)
**Bloodshot (4K)**
**The Blues Brothers (4K) (Theatrical & Unrated)**
Bullet Train (4k)
Cinderella (4K) (MA Split)
A Christmas Story (4k)
Cliffhanger (4k)
Concussion (4K)
Cruella (4K)
The Dark Crystal (4k)
District 9 (4K)
Do the Right Thing (4K)
**Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (4K)**
Doom (4K)
Dr. Strangelove (4k)
Encanto (4K)
Enter the Dragon (4k)
Eternals (4K)
Evil Dead Rise (4k)
The Exorcist (4k) (Theatrical & Extended)
**The Exorcist: Believer (4K)**
**The Fabelmans (4k)**
The Fast and the Furious (4k)
**Fast X (4k)**
Field of Dreams (4k)
The Forever Purge (4K)
Free Guy (4k)
From Here to Eternity (4k)
Fury (4k)
Get Out (4K)
Glass (4K)
Godzilla (1998) (4K)
**Gran Turismo (4K)**
**Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (4K)**
**Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (4K)**
The Guns of Navarone (4k)
Heat (4k)
Heavy Metal (4K)
Hellboy (2004) (4k)
Hellboy 2: The Golden Army (4K)
**His Girl Friday (4K)**
Hobbs and Shaw (4k)
Hocus Pocus 4k (MA Split)
Invisible Man (4k)
It Happened One Night 4k
Jaws (4k)
Jaws 2 (4k)
Jumanji (1995) (4k)
Jurassic World Dominion (4K)
Jurrasic World Fallen Kingdom (4K)
Kick Ass 2 (4k)
King Kong (2005) (Theatrical) (4k)
**Kramer Vs Kramer (4K)**
Last Actio Hero (4K)
The Last Picture Show (4K)
Lawrence of Arabia (4k)
The Lion King (Animated) (4K)
The Lion King (Live Action) (4k)
**The Little Mermaid (2023) (4k)**
The Lost Boys (4k)
The Martian (Extended Edition) (4k)
Moon (4K)
Morbius (4K)
Mulan (2020) (4K)
National Lampoon's Animal House (4k)
National Lampoon's Vacation (4k)
Oblivion (4k)
Oliver (4k)
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (4k)
Onward (4K) (MA Split)
**Oppenheimer (4k)**
Parasite (4k)
**Paprika (4K)**
Poltergeist (4k)
Predator (4k)
The Prestige (4k) (MA Split)
The Prince of Egypt (4k)
**Punch Drunk Love (4K)**
**The Raid Redemption (4K)**
Rebel Without a Cause (4k)
**Rudy (4k)**
Sense and Sensibility (4k)
Schindler's List (4k)
Shang Chi (4K)
To Sir With Love (4k)
**Sleepless in Seattle (4K)**
Smokey and the Bandit (4k)
Snow White (4K) (MA Split)
Soul (4k) (MA Split)
Spartacus (4k )
Speed (4K)
**Spider-Man Across the Spider-Verse 4k**
Spies in Disguise (4K) (MA) (Split)
**Super Mario Bros. (4k)**
**Starman (4K)**
**Tár (4k)**
Training Day (4k)
Unbreakable (4K) (MA Split)
Venom (4K)
**Violent Night (4K)**
West Side Story (4K) (MA Split)
Whiplash (4K)
Zero Dark Thirty (4K)
Zombieland (4k)
•**(HD)**•
Ant-Man & The Wasp (HD MA) (Split) (MA)
Avengers: Age of Ultron (HD) (MA Split)
Beauty and the Beast (HD MA) (MA) (Split)
Black Panther (HD MA) (Split) (MA)
Black Phone (HD) (MA)
Brother Bear (HD) (MA)
Brother Bear 2 (HD) (MA)
Captain America: Civil War (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Captain America: The First Avenger (HD MA) (Split)
Captain America: Winter Soldier (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Despicable Me 2 (HD) (MA Split)
A Dog's Purpose (HD) (MA Split)
The Fast and the Furious 6 (Extended Edition) (HD) (MA Split)
The Gunman (HD) (MA Split)
Hercules (Disney) (HD) (MA Split)
Hocus Pocus (HD) (MA) (Split)
Home (2015) (HD) (MA)
How to Train Your Dragon 2 (HD) (MA Split)
The Huntsman: Winter's War (HD) (MA Split)
Jarhead 2 (Unrated) (HD) (MA Split)
Jurrasic Park HD MA (Split)
Jurrasic Park: The Lost World HD MA (Split)
Jurrasic Park 3 HD MA Split)
Jurrasic Park 3 HD MA
Jurrasic World HD MA (Split)
Les Misérables (HD) (MA Split)
Megan Leavey (HD) (MA Split)
The Menu (HD) (MA)
My All American (HD) (MA Split)
The Nightmare Before Christmas (HD MA) (Split)
The Nut Job (HD) (MA Split)
Oz the Great and Powerful (HD) (MA Split)
Pitch Perfect (HD)
Pitch Perfect 2 (HD)
Point Break (HD)
**Rio (HD)**
Rise of the Guardians (HD) (MA Split)
Sleeping Beauty (HD MA) (MA) (Split)
Snow White (HD MA) (MA) (Split)
Snow White & the Huntsman HD (MA Split)
Straight Outta Compton (Theatrical) HD (MA Split)
Straight Outta Compton (Unrated) HD (MA Split)
Sword in the Stone 60th Anniversary Edition HD (MA Split)
Thor Love & Thunder HD (MA Split)
Upgrade (HD)
When the Game Stands Tall HD
Willow (HD) (MA Split)
●**Google Play Disney Splits**●
•**(HD)**•
**101 Dalmatians 2 (HD GP)**
Ant-Man & The Wasp (HD GP)
**Atlantis: Milo's Return (HD GP)**
**Atlantis: The Lost Empire (HD GP)**
**Avatar: The Way of Water (HD GP)**
Avengers: Age of Ultron (HD GP)
Avengers: Endgame (HD GP)
**Bambi (HD GP)**
**Banshees of Inisherin (HD GP)**
Beauty & the Beast (HD GP)
**Bedknobs and Broomsticks (HD GP)**
Big Hero 6 (HD GP)
Black Panther (HD GP)
Black Panther Wakanda Forever (HD GP)
Black Widow (HD GP)
Brave (HD GP)
**Bridge of spies (HD GP)**
Captain Marvel (HD GP)
Captain America: Civil War (HD GP)
Captain America: Winter Soldier (HD GP)
Captain America: The First Avenger (HD GP)
Cinderella (Animated) (HD GP)
Coco (HD GP)
Disneynature Monkey Kingdom (HD GP)
Doctor Strange (HD GP)
Doctor Strange: Multiverse of Madness (HD GP)
**Dumbo (Animated) (HD GP)**
**The Emperor's New Groove (HD GP)**
Finding Dory (HD GP)
Finding Nemo (HD GP)
**The Fox and the Hound (HD GP)**
The French Dispatch (HD GP)
Frozen (Sing-Along Edition) (HD GP)
Hocus Pocus (HD GP)
**The Hunchback of Notre Dame (HD GP)**
**The Hunchback of Notre Dame 2 (HD GP)**
Iron Man 3 (HD GP)
**The Jungle Book (Animated) (HD GP)**
**The Jungle Book 2 (HD GP)**
Kings Man (HD GP)
**Kronk's New Groove (HD GP)**
The Last Duel (HD GP)
Lightyear (HD GP)
The Lion King (Animated) (HD GP)
The Lion King (Live Action) (HD GP)
**The Little Mermaid 3 (HD GP)**
Luca (HD GP)
Maleficent (HD GP)
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (HD GP)
**McFarland U.S.A (HD GP)**
**Mickey's Christmas Carol (HD GP)**
Million Dollar Arm (HD GP)
Moana (HD GP)
Monsters Inc (HD GP)
Mulan (2020) (HD GP)
Muppets Most Wanted (HD GP)
Nightmare Alley (HD GP)
The Nightmare Before Christmas (HD GP)
Onward (HD GP)
**Oz the Great and Powerful (HD GP)**
**Peter Pan HD (GP)**
**Pete's Dragon (Live Action) (HD GP)**
Pixar Short Films Volume 3 (HD GP)
**Pocahontas (HD GP)**
The Prestige (HD GP)
**Ratatouille (HD GP)**
Raya and the Last Dragon (HD GP)
Robin Hood (HD GP)
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (HD GP)
The Santa Clause (HD GP)
Sleeping Beauty (HD GP)
Snow White (HD GP)
Soul (HD GP)
Spies in Disguise (HD GP)
Star Wars: A New Hope (HD GP)
Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back (HD GP)
Star Wars: The Last Jedi (HD GP)
Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (HD GP)
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (HD GP)
Sword in the Stone 60th Anniversary Edition (HD GP)
Thor Love & Thunder (HD GP)
Thor Ragnarok (HD GP)
**Tomorrowland (HD GP)**
Unbreakable (HD GP)
West Side Story (HD GP)
A Wrinkle In Time (HD GP)
Zootopia (HD GP)
●**iTunes**●
•**(4K)**•
Allied (4k) (iTunes Split)
Annihilation (4K) (iTunes Split)
Avengers: Endgame (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Captain Marvel (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Daddy's Home (4K) (iTunes Split)
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (4k iTunes) (MA)
Despicable Me 2 (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Despicable Me 3 (4K iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Doctor Strange (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Everest (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
The Fast & the Furious 6 (Extended Edition) (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Finding Dory (4k iTunes) (split) (MA)
Forest Gump (4K) (iTunes Split)
Gemini Man (4K) (iTunes Split)
Ghost in the Shell (Live Action) (4k iTunes Split)
Heat (4k iTunes) (MA)
How to Train Your Dragon 2 (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Iron Man 3 (4K iTunes Split) (MA)
Joy (4k iTunes) (MA)
Jurrasic Park (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Jurrasic Park: The Lost World (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Jurrasic World (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
The Kingsman Secret Service (4k iTunes) (MA)
La La Land (4k) (iTunes) (Split)
Les Misérables (4K iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Lone Survivor (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Maleficent (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (4K iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Moana (4K iTunes) (Split) (MA)
No Time To Die (4k)
Rocketman (4K) (iTunes Split)
Sicario (4K) (iTunes) (Split)
Sleeping Beauty (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Thor Ragnarok (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
War for the Planet of the Apes (4K iTunes) (MA)
Warcraft (4k iTunes) (Split) (MA)
Why Him (4k iTunes) (MA)
•**(HD)**•
All Eyes On Me (HD) (iTunes Split)
An Inconvenient Sequal: Truth to Power (HD) (iTunes Split)
The Big Short (HD iTunes) (Split)
Cheech and Chong: Up in Smoke (HD) (iTunes Split)
Den of Thieves (HD) (iTunes Split)
Good Kill (HD) (iTunes Split)
The Guilt Trip (HD) (iTunes Split)
I, Frankenstein (HD) (iTunes Split)
Megan Leavey (HD) (iTunes Split) (MA)
Nebraska (HD) (iTunes Split)
The Nut Job (HD) (iTunes Split) (MA)
Rise of the Guardians (HD) (iTunes Split) (MA)
Top Five (HD) (Itunes Split)
●**Vudu**●
•**(4K)**•
Annihilation (4K) (Vudu Split)
Apocalypse Now (Triple Feature) (4k) (Vudu)
Creed 3 (4k) (Vudu Only)
Daddy's Home (4K) (Vudu Split)
**Early Man (4k) (Vudu)**
Ender's Game (4k) (Vudu)
**Everything Everywhere All at Once (4K)** (Vudu)
Forest Gump (4K) (Vudu Split)
Gemini Man (4K) (Vudu Split)
Ghost in the Shell (2017) (4K) (Vudu Split)
Highlander (4k) (Vudu)
La La Land (4k) (Vudu Split)
The Man Who Fell to Earth 4K (Vudu)
The Mist 4k (Vudu)
Ran 4k (Vudu)
Rocketman (4K) (Vudu Split)
**The Secret Garden 4K (Vudu)**
Sicario 4K (Vudu Split)
Source Code 4k (Vudu)
**Ugly Dolls 4k** (Vudu)
•**(HD)**•
The Big Short (HD) (Vudu Split)
●**Lionsgate**●
•**(4K)**•
Apocalypse Now (Triple Feature) 4k (Vudu)
Belly 4k (Vudu)
The Cabin in the Woods 4k (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
**Early Man 4k (Vudu)**
Ender's Game 4k (Vudu)
**Everything Everywhere All at Once (4K)** (Vudu)
Expendables (4K) (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
Expendables 2 (4K) (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
Fall 4k (Vudu, iTunes)
Hacksaw Ridge 4K (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
Highlander 4k (Vudu)
The Hitman's Bodygaurd 4k (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
The Hitman's Wife's Bodygaurd 4k (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
Jigsaw 4k (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
**John Wick Chapter 4 4k** (Vudu, iTunes)
La La Land 4k (Vudu, iTunes) (Split)
The Man Who Fell to Earth 4K (Vudu)
The Mist 4k (Vudu)
**Plane 4k** (Vudu, iTunes)
Ran 4k (Vudu)
Requiem for a Dream (4K) ( Vudu, iTunes)
Reservoir Dogs (4K) (Vudu, iTunes)
**The Secret Garden 4K (Vudu)**
**Sisu 4K** (Vudu, iTunes)
Source Code 4k (Vudu)
Total Recall 4k (1990) (Vudu, iTunes)
**Ugly Dolls 4k** (Vudu)
•**(HD)**•
Blue Steel (HD) (Vudu)
Dementia 13 (Director's Cut) (HD Vudu or Google Play) (4k iTunes)
Dream a Little Dream HD (Vudu or Google Play)
Extreme Prejudice HD (Vudu or Google Play)
I Still Believe (HD Vudu) or (4k iTunes)
Little Monsters (HD) (Vudu, Google Play)
My Best Friend is a Vampire HD (Vudu)
Shivers (HD) (Vudu, Google Play)
The Wickerman HD (From 4k but redeems HD for now) (Vudu)
●**Paramount**●
•**(4K)**•
Annihilation (4k) (Vudu, iTunes) (Split)
**Babylon (4k)** (Vudu, iTunes)
Braveheart (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
Coming to America (4k) (Vudu, iTunes, Google Play)
Crawl (4K) (Vudu, iTunes)
Days of Thunder (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
Dragonslayer (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
The Firm (4k) (Vudu)
Flashdance (4K) (Vudu)
Forest Gump (4k) (Vudu, iTunes) (Split)
Gladiator (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
The Godfather Coda (4K) (Vudu, iTunes)
Interstellar (4K) (Vudu or iTunes)
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
Love & Monsters (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance (4K) (Vudu, iTunes)
Planes, Trains, & Automobiles (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
A Quiet Place Part 2 (4K) (Vudu or ITunes)
Rosemary's Baby (4K) (Vudu, iTunes)
Scream (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
Scream 2 (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
Scream 3 (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
Scream 5 (2022) (4k) ( Vudu or iTunes)
**Scream 6 (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)**
Sleepy Hollow (4k) (Vudu)
Sonic (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
The Sum of All Fears (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
Super 8 (4K) (Vudu or iTunes)
Sweeny Todd (4k) (Vudu)
Terms of Endearment (4K) (Vudu, iTunes)
**Titanic (4K)** (Vudu, iTunes)
Top Gun (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
Top Gun Maverick (4k) (Vudu or iTunes)
The Truman Show (4K) (Vudu)
The Untouchables (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
Vanilla Sky (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
War of the Worlds (2005) (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
The Wolf of Wall Street (4k) (Vudu, iTunes)
•**(HD)**•
Mean Girls (2004) (HD Vudu, 4k iTunes)
Wonder Park (HD Vudu, 4k iTunes)

Public Transport Police are investigating after a man assaulted several passengers on a train this morning.
Just before 9am on Sunday 19 May, four women on the Adelaide bound Gawler line train were assaulted by a man unknown to them.
The women who were all travelling separately were randomly assaulted by being punched, slapped, pushed, spat at by and verbally abused by the man.
As the train arrived in Adelaide the suspect jumped the exit barrier and ran towards the Adelaide Oval where he was caught by police and arrested.
The 47-year-old man from Salisbury has been charged with four counts of assault.
He has been bailed to the Adelaide Magistrates Court on 13 August.
None of the women assaulted required medical treatment.
He has been issued with a three-month transport barring order.
It is believed the incident took place between Kilburn and Adelaide.
Police are seeking anyone who may have witnessed the attack or may have footage of the incident to contact Crime Stoppers on 1800 333 000 or attend at their local police station.
Source: https://www.police.sa.gov.au/sa-police-news-assets/front-page-news/assault-on-gawler-line-train

Hello 👋 I’m 42yo and in a massive style rut. Right now I really need some jeans and a lightweight jacket - both things that’ll go in regular rotation in my wardrobe. Like many women my age have been skinny jeans or die for a long time. I want to try something new but I haven’t been shopping for ages and I don’t know where to start so hoping for some recommendations.
I’m 5’8 with long legs so pants often sit a bit short on me which is really irritating. I’m 75kg, size 12-14 with the ubiquitous ‘mum-tum’ but otherwise my legs/butt are slim. I have wide hips.
What I’m looking for: must be high waist to sit above and hold in my mum pooch, very soft and stretchy denim, not short in the leg (ankle length on me will be 7/8 length at best). I often find jeans uncomfortable around my belly so if anyone has any magic ideas I am all ears!! I like all shades of blue jeans no black. Budget up to couple of hundred dollars. Styles/shop recommendations gratefully accepted!!
The second thing I’m desperate for is a lightweight casual black jacket that I can easily throw on when I’m doing the school run or heading to the supermarket. Do not want a puffer jacket - too casual and too bulky. It needs to sit just below butt or mid-thigh length. Must have a hood. I like anorak styles. Want it to not be as casual as a puffer jacket but also not as formal as a coat. Doesn’t need to be super warm as I run hot and have other warm jackets anyway.
Thank you so much in advance 🙏

I'm a 46 year old man who's ended up back in the dating game... and it's not a bit like it used to be. Fair enough. Times change.
Still, the difficulties we're all facing seem to boil down to one key difference between how men and women date. Said in general terms; Men are comfortable having sex with someone regardless of any long term romantic interests. Women are comfortable having sex with someone when they trust / 'trust' the relationship is heading in the right direction.
Naturally, there are going to be outliers (some of them extreme). But, the above may serve in the general sense.
This seems like a reasonable cause for the brevity of relationships these days. Man approaches woman. She decides whether he's appealing enough to date. If she approves, they get into a relationship and (eventually) have sex while he decides if she's appealing enough to marry.
As a side note: his choice to find a different partner is too easily conflated with 'taking advantage of her'; a thing that's more often felt by only one person in the relationship. At the surface level, a man deciding that she's not marriage material is akin to a woman declining a date. For us, it doesn't feel like we're taking advantage of women... we're 'doing the things people do in a relationship'. If it doesn't work out, we still enjoyed our time together (which is hoped to be a mutual enjoyment).
But, back on topic: What we're looking at is a 'category' of men that don't qualify for dating and women that don't qualify for marriage... which may cause you to think of certain types of people. But, this is seen through all the different ways in which we present; regardless of health, beauty, wealth, fame, etc, etc. Everyone pre-disqualifies themselves by way of choosing someone that wouldn't choose them. By 'punching above their class' so-to-speak.
When there's a 'difference in opinion', men miss out and ... women get fucked (over). Yet, both will see this as being 'fucked over'; because we can't seem to stop wanting the things we want and we'll take the risk with someone that's highly desirable.
Worse, most of us see 'giving up' (aka, waiting) as a better option than revising our dating selection criteria.
I was curious about people's thoughts... and yes, I'm not arguing that the above is true, or even saying I believe it holds merit. I'm here looking for people's thoughts so I don't end up with the wrong conclusions (and a bad position to start looking for solutions).

I had a c-section almost exactly 9 weeks ago, and it was my first child. I didn't expect my tummy to deflate immediately, but I'm starting to get seriously worried that I will look permanently pregnant. Without exaggerating, it looks like I'm in at least week 33, the same size as I was when I came home from the hospital - and the tummy appears to have absolutely no intention of returning to its original size. It's not sagging or anything, it really looks like I'm still pregnant. To add to my consern, this happened to my mum too, and she never lost the pregnant belly look (just eventually got some extra kilos in other places to balance it out somewhat).
I gained 20 kg during my pregnancy, from 57 to 77 kg. I've lost at least 10 kg since, and the remaining kilos I assume are all located at my bump.
Is this really normal? Apart from my mum, I can't recall having seen other women still looking pregnant this long after giving birth. When did your tummy deflate? Is it only extra kilos causing this, or is it possible that the uterus is partly to blame, like if it isn't shrinking as it should? It's getting harder and harder to see myself in the mirror, so I'd really appreciate some encouraging words...

Just another fun little story idea I had. I am still working on Humans are the violent ones but I like to bounce around and experiment with ideas to see what I really like. I also suck at writing more casual stories, as they give me severe writer's block as I try to map out how to make a scene feel genuine in my head, but I promise I'll update that soon. If you like this story and want to see more, then like and comment. I'll gladly continue this series as well.
Start of Personal Log
Humans don't like being told what to do. They don't like being commanded, put in their place, or snubbed. It was an inexorable, inalienable trait of humans, at least any noteable humans, to go against any authority that they believed was against their interests.
Humanity would not fit amongst the stars. Few ever did. It was a trait of most successful species to be willful, ambitious, and to desire more. But once they reached the stars the new (and simultaneously very old) pecking order either quashed any spirit such species had or simply eradicated them. Countless tomb worlds and diaspora served as painful reminders of what became of the nails that chose to stick out. The hammer of order would always strike. There could be no compromise, the very soul of the authority that held the Jurisdiction together relied on a show of unmatched power, or at least the illusion of item.
In reality, the Jurisdiction was an old, fat, and lazy beast. It filled its belly on the corpses of empires far and wide, and sated its bloodlust on the shattered dreams of hopeful cubs. It had every right to, for none could challenge it: there were no new frontiers to explore, nor were there any other enemies to conquer. The Milky Way, as humans had so strangely dubbed our cradle galaxy, as well as Andromeda, had long since been warred over and settled for millennia before humanity had arrived, bright-eyed and with familiar yet otherwise foolish dreams of cooperation and prosperity. The Jurisdiction did not cooperate, nor did it ensure prosperity. Oh, it claimed it did, but in reality it simply took. The rest was just the peace that came with not being the direct target of the biggest fish in the pond. The humans didn't like that, but they had no choice.
Slavery was a common tribute. The Jurisdiction had no use for other resources: it simply took. No, it wanted those who could facilitate that unequal exchange, those raised in a world where the only morality was the one set by your lord. The Jurisdiction was held together by expectations, obligations, and dury more than any kind of shared dream, so when you were ordered to take you did so without question. Humanity was new: they had no niche or value that set them apart, but they had a penchant for killing and taking, so the Jurisdiction gave them a taste of how the galaxy worked. They killed and they took. The humans didn't like that, but what choice did they have?
Humans were strange. They learned, but not in the way most species learned. Most species learned to adapt in a passive way, to adhere to the world around them. They flowed like water, moving past and around obstacles and confirming to the boxes they were assigned too. Humans didn't confirm, nor did they adapt: they made their circumstances fit their desires. They would not move around obstacles, but rather smash through them, and they refused to stay in one box for too long. The Jurisdiction merely saw them as a particularly loud nuisance, but those who faced their wrath knew better.
It is said that when a beast seeks to make an example, it shall humble its rival by killing it's cubs. Children were one of those universal constants that brought entire communities together: the Sok’klar saw their hatchlings as gifts, shaped by the fruitful currents of the universe in perfect harmony. The Yarrack saw each and every newborn whelp as an uncut gemstone, ready to be shaped into something magical. Humanity oftentimes referred to their offspring as angels, or spirits of unbridled good sent by the gods themselves. Children were seen by most of the galaxy as gifts.
The Jurisdiction saw them as a lever to inflict suffering. It had become quite effective at enacting psychological punishments on those that stood up and spoke out. You dare to disobey? You believe you can speak out? Your gifts shall be taken from you, and you shall be without joy.
Humans didn't like this, but the Jurisdiction would have their pound of flesh, and humankind would kneel. And they did. But humans were patient creatures: most species who retained that trait of willful spit also lacked patience.
I had long since become desensitized to the Jurisdiction’s actions: it was simply how the universe worked now, as if it were a constant akin to gravity. Cruelty was the unspoken rule of this seemingly unending age, where our lives never appeared to move forward or backwards, only lay dormant. The Jurisdiction had been the unyielding authority that ruled the galaxy for thousands of years, venerable yet feared all the same.
And for the longest time I was just another cog in its wheel. My name is Kalnuracht Sedjuur-Noumar VII, and was the scion of the noble house Sedjuur-Noumar. I was born into what most would describe as veiled apathy, living a life that could be attributed to the privileged class of feared scribes that enacted the will of those above. I was an administrator and nothing more. And now I am doomed to be far less than that in the eyes of my former constituents within the endless administration. I am the only scion, as is tradition, and without an heir I am the last of my house, our name to be scrubbed from the records, worthless, meaningless, and forgotten.
I am merely Kalnuracht, nothing else and nothing more. I have seen from their eyes, the eyes of the downtrodden, and it makes my crimes of association with the Jurisdiction feel all the more damning on my worthless soul. I am worthless to the world, and this is my story.
End Personal Log #1
Start of Neural Lace Narrative Log #1
They came from the black like carrion birds in the night, encircling our convoy as if it were a dying animal ready to be picked clean without remorse. There was no warning, no list of demands sent out as civilized peoples did, nor was there either any requirement for unconditional surrender nor chance to parlay, as was done so under letter of marque: this was an unmistakable call for violence and nothing else. They sought to reduce us to slag and scavenge the rest.
So, as one would expect, the entire bridge of the ship was nearing a panicked state. This was not the actions of those practicing civility, but rather the common behaviors of despoiling barbarians, the kind that tore their way through the dark reaches of the galaxy as if they owned it.
“Wayfinder, what do your probes see?” Shouted the ship’s sovereign. He was an older Kar’Rowmach, an amphibious cephalopod species with a venerable history within the Jurisdiction going back thousands of years. Normally one such as him would be above me if it weren't for the fact that I was under the authority of the Jurisdiction’s seal of office. He didn't like me very much, but most of his kind shared the same sentiment.
“All dark, honorable Sovereign: the sensor arrays are wailing but the feedback we're reviewing is beyond incomprehensible,” the wayfinder replied with a certain restrained temper in his voice. The Sok'klar wayfinder swayed gently, his tentacled limbs grasping different metallo-liquid braille output arrays, the liquid gallium flexing and reshaping unnaturally to allow him to to take in multiple different sources of sensory output at once, with the primary navigation computer plugged into the cybernetics surrounding his opaque, gelatinous head and plugging directly into his tube-shaped brain.
The Sovereign cursed in Loskat and pointed to his bridge crew while I simply sat in the back, near the Sovereign’s symbolic throne. “Prepare countermeasures and spool up the warp drive, we cannot allow the amanuensis to be taken! He carries sensitive information that only he can translate and transcribe!”
As the bridge crew nodded and began fiddling with their own systems, I preened my feathered hide anxiously. I wasn't a fighter: us nobles of the cloth were the educated minority above all else, not those who waged war or partook in hard labor. Special cybernetics in my brain allowed me to translate triple-encoded messages that usually took a ducal signet codekey or above to parse, but even without that I was a skilled mathematician and logician. I had terabytes worth of knowledge stored within the hardware installed in my head, all well protected of course, but if I were to die it would still be a waste. I could only imagine the damage any malcontenders could do with it if they were able to get their filthy hands on me.
Suddenly, the ship rocked, and the gallium overhead display began to form crescendos like I'd never seen before. “Sovereign, decks A-3 through C-12 are venting atmosphere and our coolant systems have been obliterated,” the Wayfinder spoke in an almost serene voice, as if he was completely unconcerned by current events. I knew they were simply incapable of tonal displays, but it was unnerving nonetheless. “Once we jump, we will not be able to risk another until the vacuum of the void can reduce temperatures to acceptable levels within the plasma capacitors.”
“Damn them,” the armored nautiloid hissed, his barbed feelers coiling in frustration, “May the currents take them. What are our options? what can we see? This fleet cannot fall to the void today, not with such vital cargo.” My hackles rose lightly at the Kar’Rowmach referred to me as some object rather than an esteemed amanuensis of the Jurisdiction, but I bit my forked tongue. Now was not the time to squabble with the sovereign over who was what and what titles I deserved, not while he was so desperately attempting to keep what semblance of order within his fleet that he had left.
I could not blame the crew for being panicked either: wars were practically mythologized now, having been long since rendered obsolete with the rise of the Jurisdiction, and that felt like an eternity ago. Now, either being levied into or joining a ducal naval force was simply another career, more akin to serving as an officer of the law rather than a fully fledged soldier. Minimal training was required, most of it being the technicals of one's duty rather than any kind of combat conditioning, so expecting a fleet to actually be prepared for a combat scenario in a universe where peace was the norm was laughable.
“We are practically blind, Sovereign,” stated the Sok'klar Wayfinder, “our probes are offline, and shipboard graviton displacement sensory arrays have been rendered unreliable at best.”
“What about the particle emission array? Has there been a spike in radioactivity where we were hit?”
The Wayfinder seemed to think for a second, his gelatinous form flexing and morphing a bit before answering. “Affirmative, a jump from negligible to forty billion becquerels along decks A through E-5 on our starboard side.”
“Torpedoes…” the Sovereign hissed, stroking his barbed feelers, “Human Torpedoes. Only those primitives would rely on crude nuclear warheads.” He then turned to his militant leaders on the ship. “Noddos, Rel’ads: organize your phalanxes and prepare to repel boarders. We are bound to be assailed by those rancorous primates, and I want their skulls piled at my feet if they dare set foot on our ship.”
“Your wish is our command, Sovereign,” the two militant commanders spoke as one. Noddos, a large bipedal with multiple sets of curved spines running down his back, a pair of graceful horns sprouting from his head, and multiple rows of sharp teeth in his snout, bowed first, followed by Rel’ads, a marsupial with long saberteeth and thick fur. They both must have been fierce warriors in their own right to each lead a phalanx. They wore thick, semi-powered armor and held dueling polearms alongside their usual plasma casters, and seemed completely unfazed by the situation we were in. As they stomped out of the brightly lit bridge, I let out a quiet squawk of discontentment. “Sovereign, why haven't we jumped again? We are wasting precious time.”
“I am working on it, you spineless beaurocrat!” He warbled back, his feelers tensing in anger, “besides, it's not as if you're the one who will be spilling blood today, amanuensis, so flatten your wretched beak or I shall weld it shut with a plasma torch.
I was about to reply with something indignant, but the ship rocked again, this time causing the lights to flicker and the air to become… thick. The skin under my feathers began to blister, and I became lightheaded and confused. “Seal the damnable vents, initiate radiation scrubbers, and activate secondary life support!” Shouted the Sovereign, “Their nuclear weapons are rendering the ship inhospitable!”
I coughed up magenta blood accidentally, and I could feel more seeping from under my eyes. Some of the crew was in a similar position, but others were more resistant to radiation than I. The Sok'klar seemed completely at ease as he ran his tentacles across his morphic braille arrays before calmly announcing the ship’s status. “I've regained some control over our probes: ten, twelve, and seventeen are active and fully functional, the rest are either still malfunctioning or permanently inoperable. A rapid rise in localized radiation is also interfering with the detection of graviton displacement; we can't sense photon redirection, thus readings will remain inconclusive.
“Wayfinder, damn you, get me some kind of out here! We're easy prey until we can respond in kind!”
“Negative, something has gone awry with our processing hub, I am attempting to troubleshoot-”
And with that, the Wayfinder’s bulbous head exploded in a cascade of opaque lavender blood, covering the front half of the deck crew like a morbid art piece. Some of the crew screamed and shouted in terror before removing their cranial adaptors and choosing to interact with their displays manually. Others died just as quickly, unable to unplug in time as their brain stems fried or their blood boiled. It was a horrible way to go, having your insides neutralized by your own cybernetics, so I was glad I wasn't connected to the system.
“Cybernetic warfare! All systems are to be considered compromised, switch to manual settings or you'll be killed!”
The lights in the bridge flickered again, and the displays went haywire. The bridge crew, which obviously weren't acquainted with working without being hard-linked into the mainframe, moved at a much slower pace.
“Launch missile pods A through F and set to self-target after five hundred kilometers, then rely on their ballistic coordinates to begin firing broadsides! If we can't see the humans due to their meddling, we'll just have to feel them.” Shouted the Sovereign, “and got me a detailed report on the ship’s diagnostics readings. I need to know if this flagship is still capable of escaping or if we'll have to scuttle it and retreat on another.”
“Acknowledged, Sovereign, launching now,” affirmed another deck officer as he swiped across his own gallium output array. I could hear the dull thunk, thunk, thunk of missiles pushing out of their pods before racing off to their intended targets, then the mechanical whirring as the pods rotated to be reloaded by slaves in the lower decks. I was regaining my bearings as the many horrible sensations of being overwhelmed by radiation poisoning were beginning to subside, but I still felt as if I had been microwaved. The air was stale, the crew was horribly sick as well, and even the sovereign himself seemed to be on his last leg. I was beginning to believe that I might die here.
“Sovereign, a message from the lower decks,” shouted a communications officer, his chitin scraping against itself as he turned quickly, “they're requesting reinforcements, something about being overrun.”
“Impossible,” the Sovereign hissed out in a vain attempt to exude confidence, “We must outnumber the humans, they always go for bigger targets out of arrogance.”
“I've received reports that it's not just humans: the primates seem to make up only a third or so of the assailing force, along with some Phaeldaer and Vrex.”
The commander slammed his clawed hands down on his own output array in a fit of rage, obviously overwhelmed by the circumstances, “Then this wasn't just a typical assault, but something more sinister!” The nautiloid warbled, blood seeping from his shell as the full effects of the radiation took hold, “Get Rel’ads on the line, have him divert all spare lances to the lower decks or else we'll lose the only offensive capabilities we can use.”
“Rel'ads has gone dark, Sovereign, his vitals are critical.”
“Then either get me Rel'ads tail-leader or get me Noddos!” He screamed in rage, “don't give me this nonsense! If we don't pick it up we're all going to die, is that what you want?”
“No, Sovereign, I'm simply overwhelmed-”
“We're all overwhelmed! By the tides, I'm dying of radiation poisoning you nincompoop! Get me something I can work with!”
The officer didn't even acknowledge the Sovereign after that, simply turning back to his display. Eventually, the Sovereign was able to get Noddos on the line.
“Sovereign, two thirds of my phalanxes have been decimated by combat with the primitives and the radiation, the rest are in shambles. We must retreat and fortify elsewhere!”
“Then the ship is compromised! Rel'ads is unresponsive and the lower decks are swarming with intruders. We must evacuate the amanuensis to another ship.”
Just as the Sovereign spoke, I heard several gentle thumps rattle against the bridge’s door, and it made me uneasy. Some of the bridge crew seemed to feel the same, as they looked incredibly nervous and some even drew their sidearms. Just as the sovereign turned to give further orders, the door blew inward with a deafening explosion, followed by shouting and gunfire. Several of the bridge officers were dispatched quickly, brain matter and blood splattering against the delicate electronics. Others were shot in the legs, the torso, or in any other exotic yet non-vital body parts. The humans poured in, brandishing primitive ballistic firearms and jury-rigged energy weapons while wearing scavenged, legion-grade powered armor.
The Sovereign was the next to go, but he wasn't afforded an honorable death. He was shot along the arm with a particularly potent plasma caster, burning off his clawed hand and cauterizing the wound, the acrid smell of roasting chitin filling the already hot and cramped bridge. He fell back against his output array, the gallium reaching new highs and lows as more diagnostics and casualty reports were delivered, and he clutched his stump angrily. “I'll burn every last one of you in the foundries! I'll tie you to stakes, cover you in wax and set you alight! Your screams will be broadcasted all over the galaxy!”
One human warrior stomped up and slammed the butt of his rifle into the sovereign’s face, shattering his facial plates and causing blue blood to splatter across his section of the bridge. “Shut the fuck up, you mutant lobster,” the human said before dragging him by both antennae towards the center of the bridge and receiving a stained breeching axe from one of his comrades. “Emmanuel, start recording. We need proof.”
The other human nodded and pressed a button on his armor before lifting up his gun again. The rest of the humans fanned out, holding everyone else at gunpoint. I tried to get up and sneak out, but a human grabbed me by my neck and nearly wrung it out as he forced me to my knees and pointed a sidearm to my skull. “Get down, you piece of shit, before I blow your brains out too.”
“Damnable primate,” I hissed, but he bashed me in my skull with the base of his sidearm’s grip and sent me sprawling, making my already pounding headache worse. Another human shouted at him in a language I didn't recognize, but he sounded furious. The first brought me back up to my knees again, and I complies with a hiss and a groan, blood still leaking from my eyes and mouth and my world was spinning.
The Sovereign struggled, but he was weak from the radiation poisoning and he couldn't exactly resist on account of his lost arm. The human with the breaching ax kicked the Sovereign down and forced him to kneel before lifting up the breeching ax and splitting his chitinous head down the middle with one powerful swing, sending more blood and brains across the floor. “Execution confirmed, take his antennae just in case and we've got ourselves a bounty. Now all we need is that ugly cat’s teeth and the fat hedgehog-thing’s grimy spines and we'll be in business. Although, they do have skulls… we might as well just take their heads.”
The real horror of the situation dawned on me at that moment: they were going to kill us all, or maybe worse. They mentioned a bounty for the commanders, and multiple of the higher ranking ship officers were already dead, their brains splattered against the walls or their bodies torn apart by gunfire. I wasn't dead yet, but that didn't mean much since I wasn't an immediate threat.
“Alright, round them up and bring all the grunts to the hanger bay, then kill the rest,” the leader of the humans said in such a lackadaisical manner that his complete disregard for life almost made me sick… almost. I had seen worse from the Jurisdiction before, but usually that was from me delivering some kind of ordered judgment on a world that had sinned against order. I might have simply been the messenger, but I had seen many of the outcomes. “And make sure to collect whatever proof of bounties you can, we'll need to deliver them to the office to get cashed out. Don't let this be a repeat of last time where Juarez fucking forgot to take a few heads and it ended up cutting our profits in half, the fucking retard.”
Some of the humans chuckled at that as they dragged more of the senior officers away, out of the room and into the hall,where I heard gunshots. The rest of the bridge crew froze in place, different fear instincts kicking in. The remaining Sok'klar corralled together into what seemed to be a singular, semi-congealed mass as if to try and trick the humans into believing that they were much bigger and much more threatening than they actually were. The one Thei’chi on the bridge, an ensign who had clearly thought this would be a simple mission, bore her curved fangs at the humans and growled as they approached, her hackles completely vertical and her eyes dilated. They quickly muzzled and bound her before beating her over the head with a gun stock, sending her sprawling onto the ground. Many others simply cooperated, eyes wide and yet simultaneously empty, as if they couldn't quite process that the ship had been taken and the commanding officers were being executed as the rest were escorted to the hangar.
“Get the damn messenger down to the hanger as well, we need whatever data's in his ugly lizard head, then we can decide on what to do with him.”
I spat at him in spite, as if to try and seem brave, but it was clearly an empty gesture. “You won't get anything, primate! You couldn't possibly crack the encryption!”
The human holding me seemed to wind up for another swing, but the commanding officer simply held up his hand to stop my tormentor before strolling over to me. He knelt down and removed his helmet, revealing a beige-colored face covered in scars, wiry black hair cut down to the scalp, and multiple tattoos. “You're really fucking mouthy for a hostage,” he said before punching me across my beak faster than I could register. I heard a sharp crack as his fist connected, and my head spun again as the metallic taste of blood pooled into my mouth. “I'd advise you to shut up, but I'm sure you won't listen: you aristocratic types are so full of yourselves. Maybe I should have you flogged in the public square until your vocal chords give out once we rip those cybernetics from your head, huh? How's that sound?”
“It won't matter… it won't change anything… the Jurisdiction will hunt you down.”
“Maybe, but I doubt it will happen for some time: they really suck at doing anything that requires effort, even when they're mad enough. They just keep sending their rabid lapdogs to try and smoke us out, and they always end up full of holes,” the human officer said with a smirk, his yellowish-white teeth and green eyes sending shivers down my spine as he drew his knife. “They're just horrible at their job, you know? You've all gotten so lazy and incompetent after being able to just take what you want without resistance, and now that you've met people who are angry and crazy enough to fight back you act as if we're committing some grave injustice,” he placed the knife against my throat, the flat just underneath my now bent beak, “No, we just took a few pages out of your book, ‘cept we've got standards. No kids, for one…” he seemed to look off into the distance as his sneer deepened, “but it's more than that, we don't attack the defenseless in general and we still win against you all in fair fights.”
I went to say something else snarky, but he quickly grabbed my thin tongue with his fingers and yanked it out, blood from my mouth pulling to the floor as he held the blade of his knife against it. “No no, none of that. Say one more thing and I'll cut that rancid little tongue of yours out of your mouth and feed it to you,” he hissed at me, pressing the blade down just hard enough to draw blood. “Do you know what it's like to see a planet turn into a tomb?" he asked me, gritting his teeth, “Do you know what it's like to see everything you've ever known crumble to ash and glass, all the life and the green stripped away leaving nothing but bones? I do. I've seen it happen to countless worlds, and my grandfather always told me stories of how you bastards did it to Earth. He still prays in its direction five times a day, to Mecca, but he knows the Kaaba is gone now, or maybe it's still there, buried in the bones of those who sought refuge there.”
I didn't care for the human’s nonsensical beliefs, but I did care to correct him. “I've seen it before, and I'll see it again. And so will you, it's inevitable. The Jurisdiction will always have its judgment fulfilled, there is no alternative.”
“One day, I hope we can rectify that,” he said, then he sheathed his knife and slammed my head against the metal floor with enough force to nearly knock me out. As I lost consciousness, I could hear him speak. “Take him to the Chop Doc, and make sure the cybernetics don't get damaged: they're supposedly more valuable than any bounty on this ship.”
Warning: Severe radiation poisoning detected. Flush system immediately.
Warning: Neural Lace removal detected, chance of neurological damage high. Proceeded with caution.

First of all, I would like to say THANK YOU to all of you that showed so much love to my first post ever in Reddit!
Since my girl Millie got too much hate for wearing white and ruining the best photo of the wedding, I decided to write her sad story and share it with all of you. It's a LONG tale, full of ups and mostly downs (TLDR at the end of the post). Sooo, grab some cookies and popcorn while I spill the tea ;)
******WARNING******** The story features what I believe to be unsettling content (pregnancy loss) for some. It's hidden as spoiler, so please don't click it if it's a sensitive issue for you. <3
Our story starts with poor young adult who shall not be named (because I don't remember her name). God (me) had big plans and challenges for her, as she started with 0 simoleons in an off the grid island, with hopes of her becoming a millionaire. She moved in the big island without money, a place to sleep, a toilet, nothing. The challenge goes like this: raise money from beachcombing, buy a towel to sleep on, buy a bush to pee in, snorkel, plant and build a life from zero. And, under no circumstances communicate with another sim.
This challenge was too difficult. The loneliness and hardships, the struggle to just survive and find food, led this young girl to her death by drowning in the middle of the ocean. It was too soon, so God decided to try this challenge again, giving the new sim a head start.
That leads us to the protagonist of the story, Millie Carson.
Millie Carson is a young adult who moved in the same island, like a castaway. All she found on that island was a towel, some planted trees, a toilet bush and a grave.
The ghost from the grave came often to haunt and tease her and finally became her enemy.
At first, young Millie tried to stay away from other sims but, since they kept coming and visiting, God decided that it was ok for her to have some friends.
Millie's neighbors were Miki and Ali, a happy couple with two babies. They kept visiting and bringing food to their poor young neighbor, since she was struggling so much. Millie grew close with Ali, who came swimming to her island sometimes.
Meanwhile, Millie learned some skills that earned her some money and food. She became really good at fitness, gardening and fishing. Little by little, she earned enough money to buy diving supplies and took up some diving photography and treasure hunting. All those helped her build a tiny wood home which finally had a toilet and a shower and even a fridge. Life was getting better for Millie, until she started having feelings for her married neighbor...
Millie was attracted to Ali: his long blond hair, his green eyes and dark skin. To her surprise, Ali was interested in her as well. She tried to fight it but it was over her own power to resist. They made sweet woohoo and became a couple, while he was still married with two kids.
Love makes you do stupid things and that's what happened to Millie. She fell in love with a married man and, surprise surprise, she got pregnant with his kid.
While on her 1st trimester, she visited her neighbolover's home to tell him the news. His wife, Miki, opened the door and the sight was unbelievable: She was pregnant as well, on her 3rd trimester. Millie chatted with Miki as nothing was wrong and even socialized with her kids for a bit. But it was now time for Ali to learn the truth. Millie pulled him aside and told him everything.
To her surprise, Ali was content with being a parent to their child. Millie felt his support and fell even harder for him, causing her to do the unthinkable: Woohoo with him all over his tiny house while his wife and two kids were inside! They woohood EVERYWHERE: The small single bed, the kitchen sink, the counters, standing... They almost got caught by Miki, but hopefully she was so pregnant that it took her an eternity to reach the woohoo spot.
Millie started thinking about their future. Tormented by her jealousy, she asked Ali about Miki. Miki's super pregnant belly was an indicator that Ali still loves and woohoos with his wife, two-timing both women. To her dismay, Ali confessed his love about Miki, but he was willing to keep his relationship with Millie. But that wasn't enough for Millie...
Without hesitation, Millie served Ali an ultimatum: It's her or Miki. No love triangles, no hiding. Her kid needed a father and she needed support as a poor young woman. All those pregnancy hormones made her unreasonable - she came between a happy couple and now she felt that her lover's wife stole him from her, even though they were already together! The irony!
Millie couldn't get over her feelings, so she invited Miki over and told her EVERYTHING. That she was pregnant. That the father was poor Miki's husband. Miki got even yelled at for sleeping with her own husband. Millie was out of control.
Like a tsunami, a force that couldn't be stopped, Millie called over Ali and told him to break it off with his wife. It was now or never. Ali did as told and suddenly Miki broke down crying, hating life and those two who ruined it.
Eventually, Miki left and the.. happy couple were finally alone. Millie asked Ali to move in and he gladly accepted. He even proposed and they stayed engaged until after their baby girl, Angelique, was born.
Meanwhile, even though Miki was hating them, she still came over with extra food like a good neighbor. But her relations with the couple never improved much.
The happy couple decided to get married. Millie wore a pretty but simple boho white dress, hair down and golden jewelry. But her joyful smile was the prettiest jewel she could wear. It was a lovely, quiet wedding on the seashore, during sunset.
Soon after, Millie got pregnant again but wasn't ready or happy for it. Unfortunately, there were some complications with the pregnancy and baby Donovan was born dead. They buried him under a lemon tree and cried for many seasons about him.
Ali started helping Millie with gardening, fishing and diving. But his dream was to finally earn his degree in Communications. He still had 3 classes to pass and then he could enter the PR world. He soon earned his degree with a low to medium score and was ready to start working. There was a huge problem, though...
The island was off the grid and he could not apply for the job, not use the very much needed internet. A decision had to be made: Should they live on this island forever, living off the land, or they should move somewhere else and follow Millie's dream to become millionaires?
The choice was easy. The couple moved to Finchwick, in a big cottage house with a big garden, front and back. They brought with them the plants they had gardened with so much love and also bought some chickens. Life was good for a while, baby Angelique was growing but woohoo life was... fine.
Ali found a job in PR and had to work all day, even from home. He had to polish his charisma and writing skills and meet new people. So, that made Millie a stay at home mom, a gardener, a housekeeper. But there was no time for her lifestyle needs: outdoor living and working out. She became frustrated and was always in a bad and uncomfortable mood. She had gained a lot of weight from her pregnancy, she hardly recognized herself in the mirror...All this bad mood made her cranky. Everytime Ali tried to woohoo with her, she had no drive. So, their love life went down the drain...
Meanwhile, Ali was doing great at work, earning at least 2000 simoleons per day. He had met many people, and one of them became a really good friend of his. His name was Gabriel and he was thin, with black short hair, dark skin and modern makeup.
Ali was tormented by his feelings when he hang out with Gabriel. He couldn't understand how a man can be attracted to another guy like that. He was open to the idea, but had never acted upon it. It wasn't the looks - Gabriel was pretty basic. But there was something about the both of them that made him feel... amazing. The attention he got from Gabriel, the friendship.. It was like they knew each other from another lifetime.
Every time Gabriel came over, Ali got excited. He was interested in his words and inner world, not only his appearance. One night, he couldn't take it anymore. While they were talking the backyard table, Ali started flirting with Gabriel. Things got heated fast and they shared the most beautiful first kiss. That was exactly what he always wanted to feel, but was missing from his other relationships. He proposed to have woohoo in the home office, while Millie and Angelique were sleeping unaware upstairs...
They woohood hard and many times. It was a total WoohooFest. Morning came and Ali, having not slept at all, got ready to go to work. He didn't forget to kiss his wife goodbye, but he spent the entire day thinking about Gabriel. By night, he had decided to ask Gabriel to become his boyfriend.
Millie on the other side, was getting better. She bought a walking machine and she often went swimming in the river. Her woohoo drive was coming back strong and that meant more time with her beloved husband. They started woohooing more often, but Ali was also missing Gabriel...
God suddenly had an idea! Ali should ask Millie to have expanded woohoo with someone else, and that someone else couldn't be other than (yes, you guessed it) Gabriel. Ali went on and asked his wife and God told her that yes, it would be fun! So, unaware of God and her husband's plans, she happily accepted to engage in multiple sim woohoo...
Ali was so excited! He couldn't believe his ears! He immediately called over Gabriel and explained the situation. Gabriel accepted as well and it was time for Gabriel to meet with Millie. Millie tried to get to know him but for some reason he was distant. She tried to flirt with him but he didn't reciprocate. Millie got embarrassed and locked herself in her room for some time, to recollect herself. It shouldn't be so hard, right?
At the same time, Ali made his move on Gabriel and they woohood. Gabriel was more than excited to get together with Ali. So, why not Millie?
After Millie got over her embarrassment, she came out the room. Ali proposed having multiple woohoo and they did it. Everyone had a pleasant time.
After that, they got together two more times. But, the last time, at Gabriel's house, was the final blow.
Millie kept trying to flirt alone with Gabriel, not getting the message but, DUDE. He was NOT into her. It was heartbreaking. She tried so hard for her husband, her self esteem and again, she was turned down. A second choice. She didn't deserve it. And then, she though about it. The flirt between Ali and Gabriel. How they would have woohoo, the three of them, but Gabriel was rejecting her. It was time for answers...
Millie first told Ali to end the expanded woohoo agreement. It was too much for her. He wasn't happy about it, but he agreed. And then, she asked the million dollar question: "What's going on between you two?". Ali tried to hide it, told her they were only friends. But God was starting to feel bad about poor Millie, so had her ask again: "WHAT'S GOING ON BETWEEN YOU TWO?"
The answer was like a knife, going through her heart. Ali loved Gabriel and that's all she needed to know. Their woohoo life was non existent before and now had found someone who made him feel better, more... alive! That's all Millie needed to know. She went over to Gabriel and try to make a last, desperate woohoo pass at him. Once more, he rejected her. It was all so clear. She was the third wheel.
Her ego and her heart were stomped on the ground, like a cockroach. A beautiful, kind, hard working sim shouldn't go through all that. She headed back home, to the privacy of her bedroom and cried her eyeballs out. Ali didn't come home that night and went straight to work.
The next day, Millie invited Gabriel over. Oooh no, she wouldn't let him have Ali so easily. She would humiliate him first. He came over and she started yelling at him. Her face was red and hot, she was fueled by rage. She ending up giving him the beating of his life. When Ali came home from work, both his lovers were black and blue from fighting.
Baby Angelique started crying. She had woken up. Millie rushed upstairs to help her toddler with her needs, but Ali and Gabriel stayed downstairs. Ali tried to comfort Gabriel, asking him to stay. He didn't care about his marriage anymore. God led them to the hall upstairs, outside the bedrooms. They started woohooing again, right there, like animals!
Poor Millie, as she opened her daughter's bedroom's door, she caught her cheater husband in the act! THE AUDACITY!!! And if it that wasn't enough, when she went over to slap him, he acted like she wasn't there and went to woohoo in the shower with his boyfriend - AGAIN! WTH!!!
At this point, Millie knew it was time to give Ali the boot and kick him the hell out of their home, and so she did. After Ali's lover left, the married couple had a long, heated conversation that only had one outcome - Ali had to move out immediately.
So, he left and rented a one-bedroom apartment in the city. He also decided to ask Gabriel to live with him, and Gabriel happily accepted. A new chapter started for Ali but unresolved things were left in the middle with his wife that needed to be dealt with.
While all these took place, Millie had gotten close with celebrity Rahul Chopra. They became good friends and she was invited to his wedding. It was a one of a kind event because Rahul had a shotgun wedding with his wife when they were teenagers due to unwanted pregnancy. After many kids later, Rahul's eldest daughter, with the villainous valentine aspiration (long story) decided to break her eternally faithful parents up for fun. So they did break up, but they were so made for each other, like puzzle pieces, that it was impossible to not end up together again.
Rahul fell back in love with his wife and they decided to do it right this time. They planned the perfect wedding event in San Myshuno's park, during sunset. The whole family was there and their 2nd child, Philip (YA) would take the professional pictures of the wedding.
The ceremony started, everyone (almost) was seated and the photographer (and me) were preoccupied with taking the happy couples pictures. As the ceremony ended, the couple was ready to share their first kiss as husband and wife. The air was filled with confetti that floated playfully around them, the fireworks were set off behing them and the sun was showering them with the warmest rays. It was a one time opportunity to get the perfect picture. Philip got ready to press click. And then, she appeared.
Millie, clearly bothered and heartbroken by other people's love, made a run for the exit and ruined Philip's perfect photograph. The angry look on her face would forever haunt Philip's mind. Why would that woman ruin this happy moment and why the hell would she wear white at someone's wedding? I mean, you wouldn't mistake her for the bride, who wore an expensive wedding gown, but still... Something was wrong with this girl and Philip had to find out...
After the wedding, Millie went back home. The days passed and the divorce was not finalized. She asked her kid who she wanted to stay with, but without reply. She called Ali over, but he texted back he didn't want to come over. Millie had her -now child- daughter call over her dad. This time, Ali responded positively and soon after he arrived. Millie took him straight to the lawyers to see who will get custody of Angelique.
This time, God had no plans, God left it all to luck. So, unfortunately, Ali won custody of Angelique, who immediately went to live with him. Now, Millie was alone. Only her and her money and her baby son's grave in the front yard. Now she was angry, NOW HE WOULD PAY.
Millie grabbed Ali and went once again to the lawyers. It was now time to split the estate. At least 100k simoleons in the bank, plus whatever the house is worth. Millie wants to get everything, but once again, God won't interfere. She comes back home, head down, beaten - she lost 80k.
She turns to her new friend, Philip. He is basic, but he's a good guy. He lives alone in an apartment in San Myshuno, studies Fine Arts in university, comes from a good family. He also has a girlfriend that lives across the hall from him, but Millie doesn't know. And God tells her to come onto him. Now Philip has two girlfriends and God must interfere.
God and luck are playing games with Millie's life.
As I'm writing her story, there's only one thing I feel: Sad.
This girl started out with hopes and dreams. So I think that we should forgive her for attending a friend's wedding wearing white. Some God forgot to change her formal outfit and it was all she had to wear. She's going through a lot!
Her story ends for now, but if you guys like it I might write more about her life's adventures.
Also, what should she do with Philip? Let me know in the comments!
If you read this whole essay / story , you are amazing! And thanks! Hope you liked it! :)
TLDR: YA woman starts with 0 money in off the grid island. Wants to earn a million. Gets pregnant by married neighbor with kids. Marries him and they buy new home. They get pregnant second time, lose the baby.He gets a good job, meets new people, gets new guy friend, has woohoo with that friend. The 3 of them have expanded woohoo. Woman breaks it off. Woman confronts husband about loving other man, he confesses he loves him. Woman kicks him out and he lives alone in flat. The other guy moves in with him. Woman heartbroken, goes to friends wedding wearing white, is angry at happy couple's love, ruins the married couple kiss photo. Photo becomes famous on Reddit. Woman loses custody of only child. Woman loses 80k simoleons after splitting estate. Woman becomes girlfriend of the photographer from the friend's wedding. Photographer already has another girlfriend.
*****EDIT*********** I can't believe I forgot to write this, but Millie also drowned in the ocean while being fatigued from diving for treasures. I decided to not save and give her a second chance. Her life is dramatic, UUUUUUGH!!!!

The lights in the hospital’s waiting room buzzed incessantly. The floor was freshly bleached from last night's cleaning. A lady in the middle of her third trimester sat with her husband near the entrance. She could feel a headache beginning to come on.
Her husband was flipping through a magazine he found on the rack near the middle of the room. His deep brown eyes scanned its pages, and his brows were furrowed.
“Jack,” she said, “are you alright?”
“Yeah,” he replied, glancing at her. “Why?”
“You seem mad, is all.”
“Mad? Why would I be mad?”
“Oh. I don’t know. You just look; it is all,” she said, placing her hand on the rim of her belly.
“Trust me. I’m not mad,” he said, flipping to another page.
“Well, we were lucky Mrs. Carter let me work a little overtime for this, huh?” She adjusted herself on the seat cushion.
“We are.”
“It only took two months of scrimping by, but we got our reservation, didn’t we? I mean, how many parents, you know, get to see their child before they’re really here?”
“Not many. That’s for damn sure,” he replied.
Her husband closed the magazine and stood up to go get another one.
“Could you get me one?” she asked him.
“They don’t have anything you would like.”
“It doesn’t matter to me.”
“Alright.”
She looked at him from behind and thought he would be a good father. The baby kicked the wall of her belly, and she chuckled. She could overhear the conversation between one woman and another near their seats.
“This is my second time,” one of the women said. “Second?” the other asked.
“Carlos and I came in when I was at the beginning of my second trimester. You know what they say. The earlier you come, the less accurate the reading is.”
“What happened?”
“Our daughter is going to be beautiful. That we know for certain, but around her early twenties, she goes to prison. For murder.”
“What. Really?”
“Yeah. But again, we came early in the pregnancy. We haven’t been able to sleep since that reading. So, we set up another appointment much later. My date is a month away, so the reading should be pretty accurate,” the first woman said.
“What are you going to do if the reading is the same?”
“What most parents would. We can always try again for another.”
The woman’s stomach did a somersault, and her eyes searched for the nearest waste bin, but the feeling subsided when her husband came over and handed her a magazine.
“Thank you, hon’,” she said, swallowing.
“You alright, Em?” he asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little nausea.”
“You going to throw up?”
“Only if you keep talking about it,” she said, looking up and closing her eyes.
“I’m sorry,” he said, sitting down. This was the one I thought you would find most interesting.”
She opened her eyes and glanced down at the magazine in her lap. It was a magazine about car parts and overall car maintenance.
“Thank you. I just needed something to pass the time.”
“No problem. How long have we been waiting for? It feels like we have been here forever. I must’ve read every magazine on that rack by now,” he said, smiling.
The woman pressed her thumb and middle finger at her temples.
“Jack?” she asked.
“Yeah?”
“Do you think he will turn out alright?”
The man looked at his wife’s stomach, and his smile faded.
“I am sure he will turn out fine,” he said, grabbing her hand.
She felt a little better now. His words always seemed to soothe her when she needed it most. Though, she felt stupid asking the question she had asked him a thousand times.
“What if he’s an astronaut? Or finds the cure for cancer?”
“If our kid finds the cure for cancer, the doctors will make sure he is born. Whether we want him or not,” he said, laughing.
She only smiled, and it was faint.
“You do want him, right?”
“What?” he asked. She could see his cheeks flush. “Of course I do; why would you ask that?”
She apologized for asking the question. Her eyes darted to the door where the nurse would appear and call people names.
“Why would you ask that?” he asked again.
“I am sorry. I already apologized. I’m just flustered. Pregnancy. It does things to you.”
Her husband’s expression loosened, and he opened the next magazine he grabbed.
The woman skimmed through hers without really reading anything. Motors are for sale, and the “Eight Easy Steps to Keep Your Car’s Battery” did nothing for her.
The door near the front desk opened, and the nurse called her name. Her husband sat up promptly and helped her from her seat. As they walked toward the smiling nurse, the only thing she could think about was the future.

Hello Reddit users and friends, I am a 42-year-old male currently navigating a complex separation from my 36-year-old wife. We've been married for 14 years and together for 16. We have only one child, and I manage a business that I originally started over a decade ago and she joined as a helper 2 years ago.
Despite our plans to support each other as friends post-separation, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to cope with the situation, especially the idea of dating again.
Context for our situation:

• Relationship Foundation: We both had minimal dating experience prior to our marriage, which might have affected our relationship dynamics. We never cheated on each other.
• Career and Financial Support: I have financially supported her through three different career paths, including her current roles as an engineer and a teacher, without expecting financial contribution to our household. Contrary to her feelings and dis-approval of any of my support, I've always encouraged her career development and she saved every Penney she made into her own personal savings by working in both careers.
• Legal and Financial Arrangements: Our marriage included a pre-nup, which we later revised into a post-nup due to ongoing relationship issues, detailing the separation of our property and a 2-year promise to assist her with a lump-sum after divorce when / if it happens.
• Family Dynamics: There have been ongoing challenges with family acceptance on both sides. She has repeatedly criticized my racial and religious-sect and all of my roots and background, even my fatherhood (i am a good father as i get compliments from strangers and i feel content about my fatherhood abilities, often shown in my kid's sports, school, and character) and she pretty much criticizes everything about me which has caused further isolation.
• Mental Health: I suffered a serious depression about five years ago, which led me to seek therapy. Although the therapy was beneficial, she was dismissive and even ridiculed the process, which strained our relationship further.
• Social Isolation: My social life has been significantly isolated to a few friends, which includes a few straight friends and two gay friends. Total isolation from women friends (she is very jealous) This isolation was exacerbated by her jealousy and reluctance to engage socially with my acquaintances or partake in my planned activities.
• Exploration of Sexuality: In an attempt to cope with our marital issues, I explored my sexuality with a friend, with her initial and complete consent (started about 16 months ago and went on for a few weeks and had stopped since 14 months ago due to the added criticism and drama, i tested him for STDs before, and tested after-wards, and she saw all the tests before and after). This later became a point of contention and she punished me by isolating me from any intimacy with her or any other human being for 5 months which i agreed to in-order to avoid divorce. Again, i never cheated on her, she approved every thing and she had met my friend as well ! I did not mind having sex with him, was socially very rewarding and approving of my character as opposed to my distant wife's dis-approval, but i missed having sex with her, as we had a successful sex life (which she also criticizes the next day but feels satisfied in the moment with a positive feedback of "amazing" and the like) however, i am not socially happy with her ! She also met a guy back then, over a year ago, but she never became intimate with him, and i had approved.
• Physical Abuse: She had punched me very strongly once on the chest, which was very painful for 2 weeks and hindered my ability to exercise well, and had hit me another time before-hand but was not as painful, i never hit back, i am a muscular guy so i wouldn't dare out of fear of causing a serious harm.

Specific Challenges:

• Despite our separation, we are still living and working together but are physically and emotionally distant.
• I am grappling with feelings of loneliness and isolation, compounded by the emotional toll of our strained relationship. I am seeking therapy just so you know, i am fine.
• There is a lingering feeling of being misunderstood and unfairly judged, not just by her but also by her family, and i tend to be a sensitive person, had my own childhood trauma as well.
• The situation has left me questioning my readiness to date again, as my feelings for her wane daily, and i feel, well, just over-whelmed sometimes, i still do my fitness routine and i work hard.

Questions for the Community:

1. For those who have navigated a long-term relationship breakup, especially under complex circumstances, how did you manage the emotional fallout ?
2. When and how did you decide you were ready to start dating again? Were there specific signs or milestones that helped you realize it was time?

I’m looking for guidance, personal stories, or any advice that could help me understand how to move forward emotionally and socially. Thank you in advance for your support and insights.
I am usually social, have a good sense of humor, and respectful, and i love people. She tends to be reserved and she is also likeable by people. She does NOT take pride in being next to me out in public, but all my friends enjoy my company and i am known to be a respectful and fun to be around. Enough said about our characters, we are both average and never had any troubles with the law.

Tissue
Polysemous title- Tissue • Tissue- paper + skin (human life is fragile [criticises arrogance, encourages us to protect]) • Also paper (not alive) + skin (alive)- criticises monotony of life, not really living • Tissue paper- found in bibles and holy texts, but fragile (overinflated importance of identity causing wars and discrimination, really it’s very fragile and identity isn’t real, we’re all just people (tissue as in skin)) • Tissue- used to wipe away tears, togetherness can reduce suffering • Tissue- medical term for deep skin- poem shows deeper nature of humans and our potential for goodness, can be wounded and damaged by outside influences but can always heal
"Paper that lets the light shine through, this is what could alter things" - reference to religious texts paper, light as Jesus and Allah (power of religion) - or coexistence with nature (Dharker is a Muslim Calvinist)
Enjambment- freedom, lack of control of humans, rejecting constraints
Free verse- same thing
"Let the daylight break through capitals and monoliths" - power of nature, criticism of authority, weakness of humans- “break” violent personification, destroying authority, daylight + break = sunrise + hope
"The sun shines through their borderlines" - nature overcomes human segregation identity, criticism of war, power of nature) sibilance shows power, “their” still shows separation, criticise that
"fly our lives like paper kites" - childish metaphor, mocking control of money over life (criticism of authority)
"the back of the Koran" - “the” repetition shows importance, “back” shows it is hidden/shunned by society, still holding onto identity
"Transparent" - repetition, criticism of dishonesty of authority
Exposure
"Merciless iced east winds that knive us" - personification of wind shanking people (first line not about war but nature- more significant) (power of nature)- subtle sibilance (just as dangerous as bullets but most people don’t realise)- Germans were in the east, but the only thing from there is wind
ABBAC rhyme, structure is built only to be taken down (tension of soldiers expecting fight but let down)
Pararhyme- unsatisfying for reader, reflects how the soldiers are always nervous but never get to chill
“What are we doing here?” Rhetorical question to criticise authority, or actual question to show PTSD confusion, can be asking what they are DOING or why they are HERE
"For love of God seems dying" ok 1. The soldier's love of God is dying 2. God's love for the soldiers is dying 3. To show love of God, you should die
"forgotten dreams" - juxtaposition, loss of hope, forgotten dreams on purpose to be less sad? war made them forget? “forgotten” disassociated from PTSD, “dreams” as happiness from the past that seems unreal
“a dull rumour of some other war" reference to the Bible and Armageddon, metaphorical end of the world for the soldiers be suffering "sudden successive flights of bullets streak the silence" - sibilance represents sound of bullets, jolting reader out of relative lack of noises, feel like soldiers
Epistrophe "but nothing happens" cyclical structure, stuck in suffering
“we” “us” “our” collective pronouns, shared experience, comradeship, loss of identity, relatable to all soldiers
Kamikaze
Title- single word, only military rank- only seen as a kamikaze pilot by others
Structure- 6 lines per stanza but free verse and lots of enjambment- conflict between control and freedom (military/social expectations/duty vs love for family/nature/memories/life)
Constant shifts between first person and third person- disconnect from family due to shame
“Her father embarked at sunrise” -sunrise as power of nature + Japan’s military flag- conflict
“a shaven head full of powerful incantations” -incantations are deliberately vague- orders from military? prayers? inner conscience against it? It’s “powerful” tho and influences him, and it’s “full” showing his distress, shaved head like most kamikaze pilots
“green-blue translucent sea” beautiful imagery, “translucent” shows how things are unclear but getting clearer- nature helps him decide what to do
Describes fishes “like a huge flag”- patriotic semantic field shows brainwashing, but reduces as the poem goes on, simile shows how he is starting to disconnect and change his mind,
also as “a figure of eight”- shows thoughts of pride and prosperity-
“The dark shoals of fishes/flashing silver as their bellies/swivelled towards the sun” - • sibilance shows ocean noises and beauty, “dark” -> “flashing silver” things get brighter and easier to see- knows what to do thanks to nature • “Silver”- medals he would have gotten for being a kamikaze pilot, but true reward is in nature • “Sun”- represents beauty of nature and also Japanese flag- conflict but now there’s also nature in the mix • Belly up- death on his mind
“bringing their father’s home safe/-yes, grandfather’s boat- safe” repetition of “safe” shows reason to come back- wants to return to family, memories
“a tuna, the dark prince, muscular, dangerous.” • first mention of danger = power in the whole poem, danger to the mission as it causes the pilot to have doubts, true power is in nature and memory • First full stop in the poem and lots of commas- makes us stop and think like the pilot about what he’s abt to do
“laughed” “loved” at the end of the poem- all in past tense- nothing left for the soldier
“we too learned to be silent”- “learned” should be positive but contrasts with what they learnt- criticises how they were taught shame by the older generations- but it’s said in first person, the daughter is criticising this and teaching her children not to think that way
Poppies
Title- honours and grieves dead soldiers, short single word title shows full intent of the poem and how the mother’s life is consumed by grief
Dramatic monologue- emphasis on the domestic impact and how the soldier isn’t present in the poem
Free verse, enjambment- chaotic, lack of control over the son, distressed
Domestic + military semantic fields- life has been ruined by war
“Spasms of paper red, disrupting a blockade of yellow bias”- mix between war + domestic • “spasms” and “red” is injury and pain- mother is worried or is hurt by letting go (spasms is involuntary muscle action- involuntary letting go), • “paper” is the fragility of the son • “blockade” is military language showing her worry abt the conflict, how she wants to “block” her son from going into the military • “disrupting” the fabric - the son becoming a soldier disrupts the peace or she is trying to disrupt him from going to war
“The dove pulled freely against the sky, / an ornamental stitch”- dove represents peace and grief- she and her son is at peace with death, “pulled freely” is an oxymoron- inner conflict with grief or letting her son go, the comma shows a pause to reflect on the grief, the “ornamental stitch” metaphor for the mother (pretends to hold it together)
“I was brave”- takes down ideas of just the soldier’s bravery but also the mother’s, but past tense shows current weakness from grief
“Sellotape bandaged around my hand” • Bandage shows wounds • Sticks them together one last time- cat hairs are removed, no more reason to stay • Claustrophobic feeling- stuck in the domestic role, can’t go and protect the son
“Blackthorns of your hair”- religious connotations of Jesus on the cross, sacrificed for the country- metaphor for the son
History Boys
"Enemy of education" war metaphor and alliteration, opposition between true understanding of literature and grades only used shallowly “Cheat’s Visa”
"a fact of life" indisputable and unchangable, in opposition with Irwin's views on history (truth does not matter to him until now?)
Drummer Hodge: Intertextuality, Tom Hardy (the poet) represents Hector, sympathising with the ordeal of the youth, Drummer Hodge represents the Boys, thrown into the chaos of life without proper guidance
"She's my western front" war metaphor objectifies Fiona, personal pronoun further expresses how women were seen as objects to be owned
“... all the other shrunken violets you people line up" [you people] segregates gay people, [shrunken violets] derogatory language
"Some of the literature says it will pass" looking to literature for solace and comfort during a sexuality crisis
"All literature is consolation" Dakin changes his mind on literature symbolising him changing to Irwin's side. No need to look for solace in literature when he can pursue Irwin
Parallels with "all knowledge is precious" from Hector - A.E. Housman, one of the first intertextualities and used in the intro to establish his character
“cunt-struck” “a cunt”- Mrs Lintott repeats the colloquialism “cunt” twice, to describe Dakin as “cunt-struck” and Headmaster as “a cunt”. This is the hardest swear in the play and is used show that it wasn’t a slip of the tongue, and to break down stereotypes of women being gentle and passive
“history is women following behind with the bucket” - her big scene about women in history at the end of the play (which is typical for Alan Benett’s plays such as “Kafka’s Dick”) so it would be recent and stay in the audience’s mind when the show ended
Irwin intro as politician in the future "etc., etc." while talking abt freedom- that man gives no fucks about freedom really, just waffling on (first impression for the audience too!!)
Parallel with Holocaust debate- Lockwood uses the SAME EXACT PHRASE while talking abt how the holocaust was bad, (dismissiveness of mass genocide? in this education system? it’s more likely than you think) then goes on to argue that they should be unique with their arguments- Irwin passed on thr mindset even on such an important subject
Hector is set up to be looking cool and all (motorcycle scene dramaticness, greek name connotations, fav teacher) but is absolutely uncool when we get to know him- purposeful? "studied eccentricity" and all. clinging onto youth?
Posner is actually rather helpful as the "dictionary person" bc i doubt the audiences know what "otiose" means
SCRIPPS IS THE MOST RELIGIOUS ONE AND CLOSEST TO POSNER it can dismantle the idea that religion is against queerness
Irwin didnt know how nietzche was pronounced bc from what we know of him he would call Dakin out on that