Time to wait after fingerprinting

I (35F) want to leave my abusive husband (32M combat veteran) so badly but I don't know the best way to do it. I'm sorry this is so long but I'm begging for help, insight, any reassurance...
He says he used to have major anger issues but I never thought he would take them out on me. He has PTSD and a traumatic brain injury which makes his moods unpredictable.
I talked to his ex two days ago and she said he shoved her once, put his hands around her neck during a flashback, and also had a gun pointed at her during a flashback. He said they were engaged but she insisted they never were. She also said he was supposed to pick her up from the airport one time but he texted back saying he couldn't, because he wasn't sure if he was going to do something bad to her.
His abuse started when we moved in together while we were still engaged. I found out he had been on Onlyfans at the beginning of our relationship and just shortly before we got married... I was angry but I downplayed it and thought I could get over it. All it did was cause massive trust issues that have never healed and never will. He was subscribed to one of his exes and he also messaged one of the girls asking to meet just shortly after I stayed the week at his place for my birthday.
I spiraled mentally once the anger phase passed (severe depression and anxiety) and told him what I saw. He tried to deny it but when I said I knew his "pictures" he caved and said he wished I never told him and punched the headboard of our bed. He's my only source of comfort so I went to him countless times telling him I was still struggling with my trust issues and worried about whether he was still looking at other women, because he is subscribed to tons of women like that on Instagram and Tiktok. I started snooping looking for any evidence I could get so I could finally convince myself to leave him.
Everytime I confronted him about what I saw he made excuses and flew into a rage at me for snooping, screamed in my face, threw objects and furniture around (including our wedding rings and he broke my engagement ring in the process), punched walls, threatened divorce, demanded me to leave, or walked out without saying where he was going which made me call the police one time to look for him. I blamed myself because I was the one snooping and I told myself how would I feel if my partner constantly snooped on me? I blamed myself for everything and still kind of do. But he says it's his fault I'm like this and he just has to deal with the consequences.
Other times he says he has changed and it's my fault for getting in my head all the time, that my lack of trust is always so hard on him, and that my depression and anxiety are constantly dragging him down even though he says he's doing everything right to make me feel better. When I come to him to talk he usually sighs or treats it like a chore.
He says he beats himself up everyday for what he did and has apologized multiple times. But I never see any true regret. He told me "everybody else gets over their problems, why can't you?" He says he went through so much worse in the military than I have ever gone through and he got over his problems, so why can't I? That I need to "unfuck" myself and "everybody has depression."
One day when he came home I was feeling very low but he was in a bad mood already and he came at me, screaming that he's getting tired of me always being down and threatened divorce. I asked if he hated me and he looked at me and said in a really frightening way "if I hated you you'd be dead." That crushed me. Another time I got mad and said I was this way because of what he did to break my trust and he screamed at me multiple times to STFU, "waaah waaah waaaah you're always a Debbie downer" and threw in my face "you have no friends." He said he was done with the marriage but I talked him into staying because he has me so convinced the problem is me.
Other things... rough/forceful/demeaning sex... always saying "fuck you baby" in a cutesy way as a way to interact when we're doing our own things separately... slamming a controller down on my knee accidentally because he flew into a rage over losing a game... continuing to yell and saying he wasn't allowed to express anger even when I said it was scaring me... telling me once "I don't THINK I'd ever hurt you" (physically)... almost never helping with house chores and shopping... using me for money even though he makes more than I do with his disability payments... insulting my mother who helps us financially... trying to kick my cat one night when he couldn't sleep.
He's always so mean and critical of complete strangers when we go out and he acts like a macho narcissist who has everything figured out and he knows the right way about everything, like someone who is super opinionated to an obnoxious extent.
There's more but this is the worst of it all.
I read Lundy Bancroft's book asking myself if he's really that bad because 90% of the time he's good and loving. I know what I'm involved in and I know how much I've trauma bonded with him. But I've reached the point where I wake up every day in panic and despair knowing I'm still here and I want to get out. I already tried to leave before with a go bag and my cat but he talked me back. Some days I still try to convince myself the good times are worth staying for because I'm exhausted and I just want a good day for once. I've been miserable for months but I'm a pressure cooker now just waiting to blow. I'm falling apart.
I know I'm going to talk to a divorce lawyer and at least see if I have a case to have him evicted through a PFA. In that case he would be moving back in with his dad but he'd be close by. I could get the locks changed but I wouldn't put it past him to stalk me and try to hurt me (PFA or not -- he is suicidal anyway and has a lot of contempt for laws and the police), vandalize my car, or try to break into the apartment to hurt me or my cat. I don't even know if I would still be happy here where all these bad memories happened. And I wouldn't feel safe for myself or my cat everytime if I left the apartment.
The only other option is moving back in with my alcoholic narcissistic mother (my abusive alcoholic scizophrenic brother lives with her too) who doesn't know how to provide emotional support and hasn't been supportive at all throughout this marriage except financially. I would have to live in her garage, trust her not to let my cat loose if I go out, and make multiple trips back to my abusive husband still in the apartment to get all my belongings and furniture. He doesn't work, he's on school break now for summer so he's always here. I know I can get a police escort but they're not going to wait around for me to pack up the entire place. Almost everything is mine.
My husband might even just volunteer to leave and move back in with his dad like he has done before. I might not even need a PFA. I'm more afraid he'll try to hurt me if I actually get one versus if he just left by himself. I also don't know if he would offer to leave then just try to come back and hurt me before I could get the locks changed. The landlords constantly ignore the residents so I'd have to wait days or weeks for a lock change. Our lease ends next March.
I don't know what to do. All I want is to be by myself again with my cat in a safe place and it seems like no place and no escape plan I can come up with is entirely safe or secure. I'm at a loss but I can't keep living like this.

So I've been with costco for a long time and recently the bakery added 5 wrappers. so I asked our manager with them all coming if its possible I can sundays off for church with my family. she came back to me and said but I have to be willing to come in when needed which I happily agreed. Now another employee with a year seniority heard about me getting and told me he's gonna try and take it from me when I just confirmed I got it.
is that true he can just come from behind after me and manager worked out days off and take it from me? I know about seniority but that's mean if he can do it like that. he should have to state he his preferred days off before not just wait till he hears someone got their days changed off and take it from them after the fact. I'm gonna talk to my manager tomorrow about it but I wanna know now if its true? can someone steal your days off right after you get them approved?

Republic 7^th Fleet, Centaurus Sector, 407 light years from Earth
RSS Vercingetorix, Independence-Class Carrier, 2174 A.D.
Vice-Admiral Mei Zhou had just finished making the final changes to the fleet’s reconnaissance patrol routes with her senior staff when the comm panel on her desk chirped, displaying an incoming comm request from Admiral Thompson. She quickly thumbed the pad being offered by her aide so that he could issue the orders they were just working on and turned to the rest of her staff. “Nice job, people. Let’s get to work. Dismissed.” As the staff filed out the door, she started entering the codes needed to decrypt the incoming comm channel and looked up to make sure the room was empty. She pressed the open channel icon, and Admiral Thompson’s holo image appeared in front of her desk, ending just below his waist and making it seem as if he was actually there, sitting.
“Mei, how’s your new ship treating you?” he asked, smiling. “She is an absolute beauty, Karl. I still can’t believe that she is mine.” She responded, returning his smile. “What can I do for you, Karl?” Thompson chuckled, and his holo image leaned back as he reclined in his chair. “Straight to business; I always liked that about you, Mei. Alright, here we go. We have received intelligence reports that the Commonwealth has begun evacuating one of their last remaining coreward periphery worlds that is now dangerously close to the expanded Insectoid border. We have also received an update from our spy drones in that same region that six Hive ships and almost four hundred cruisers that were patrolling their side of that border area have disappeared. This is too much of a coincidence, and I want you to detach a combat patrol and send them there.” Thompson finished speaking, and a flashing icon popped up on her comm panel, indicating that she had just received new orders. She tapped it and quickly scanned the new orders as the admiral waited. She looked up at his holo image. “Karl, I acknowledge receipt of the new orders and will implement them. Between me and you, why are we getting involved with this? The Commonwealth has a navy, and they should be fighting to protect their space. We can’t keep coming to the rescue and defending their members; we are already spread too thin as it is.”
Thompson nodded his head in agreement. “Mei, I agree with you in principle, but there are social and political considerations involved here. The near extinction of the V’rni has caused considerable turmoil among the citizens of the Republic. They know logically that we could not have stopped such an attack like that one, but the perceived failure to protect them or prevent the attack still weighs heavily on their souls. The Commonwealth is currently attempting to evacuate the Jaleen system, and they are one of the last surviving members that voted yes before our petition to join the Commonwealth was denied. It also doesn’t help that the Jaleeni are avowed pacifists and look like bipedal Newfoundland dogs. They are technically a bear-like species, but to humans, they look like humanoid dogs, and the government is unwilling to lose the popular support it currently enjoys by allowing the Jaleeni to be exterminated. I mean, look at these guys.”
Another flashing icon popped up on her screen a moment later, and she pressed it. It turned into a hologram depicting a typical Jaleeni family of a mother and father with a litter of six pups, and she couldn’t help but smile as she looked at the photo. They were wearing their traditional rough-spun linen clothes that made them look like dogs cosplaying as monks. They looked adorable, and she felt her heart melt while staring into their deep brown eyes, which looked sad. She understood the reasoning behind it, especially after the mass extinctions that occurred in Earth’s biosphere because of World War 3.
After the war, humanity had an awakening when they surveyed their destroyed world and came to terms with the disappearance of thousands of species and the near extinction of thousands of others. What followed were three generations of desperate measures to salvage what remained and a worldwide effort at habitat restoration and de-extinction efforts utilizing a wide array of methods such as back-breeding, cloning, and genome editing. Dogs were almost driven to extinction by the war as they were uniquely susceptible to the BioChem weapons that were developed and refined by the Eastern Coalition animal testing on poor innocent canine subjects. Between the Biochem weapons, owner deaths, abandonment, and starvation, almost 90% of the domesticated canine population and entire breeds were lost by the war’s end. Cats fared much better, but they still suffered a loss of almost half of their pre-war population, and a large percentage of the survivors reverted to a feral state. The result of all of this was an almost religious reverence for the preservation of sentient animal life on human worlds and a somewhat fanatical tendency of humans to take on the mantle of guardians for sapient alien species that resembled animals to them.
“Karl, I understand; I do. I just don’t like the fact that we are operating on so many fronts. Some of our fleets and task forces are patrolling areas far enough away that I worry about them getting reinforcements on time if they are attacked, and now my fleet is being partitioned to send a combat patrol almost three hundred light-years away from our current position. After the assault on the V’rn system, half of our combat power was recalled to Republic space to prevent the same thing from happening to us, and yet we are still being tasked with properly defending Eleani and Xenxin territory with half the ships we had before. Have they lost their damn minds at HQ?” She realized she was almost yelling at the admiral, and Mei took a deep breath, recognizing that her outburst was unbecoming of a Republic naval officer. She attempted to quickly apologize to Admiral Thompson. “Karl, I’m sorry that was uncalled for-“
The admiral raised a hand to stop her, an amused expression in his eyes. “Mei, I said the exact same thing to my boss as you did almost verbatim, and not as diplomatically as you, I might add. My concerns were addressed to my satisfaction, and I think yours will be when you get to your destination. There will be a task force joining you there, and I think you will be pleased. That is all I can say for now over the comms. You will lead the combat patrol to the coordinates listed in the orders you received, and the task force joining you there will fall under your command. I have a personal favor to ask of you. Please keep an open mind when you link up with the task force. You will rendezvous with Commodore Therax, and he is instrumental in our efforts to undermine the increasingly despotic Commonwealth government. More information about him and the Nekuli were added to your orders, make sure you review it. I took a big gamble on this, and I would be grateful if you did your best to make this collaboration work. That is all for now, and I wish you and your crews good fortune and godspeed, Mei. Take care of yourself.” The admiral finished speaking, and Mei noted the personal nature of his last few words, nodding an affirmative to his request.
“Admiral, I thank you for your words, and we won’t let you down. I need to issue the orders now to get there and link up with the task force on time. I’ll send a null space comm drone to the nearest relay to confirm our arrival and integration. Vice-admiral Zhou out.” As she leaned towards the comm panel to close the channel, she saw Admiral Thompson doing the same, and he gave her a wink and a mischievous smile before she pressed the icon, terminating the connection. She leaned back in her chair and blew out a deep breath. “Now what the hell was that all about?” She asked out loud to herself, as the confusing and secretive nature of her orders and the personal request of the admiral added to the uncertainty of what she was expected to do. She keyed her wrist pad and texted her aide to come back to her office for new orders. He was going to be livid that they just wasted half a day revising the patrol routes to maximize efficiency and increase their patrol range. A small smile crossed her lips as she waited. He had an obvious tell of his lower left eyelid spasming when he was mad despite displaying no emotions on his face, and she knew it drove him nuts that he couldn’t control it. Witnessing it was one of the small joys she had in her difficult job as vice-admiral, and she was looking forward to it.
Fifty-six hours later, her task force flashed out of null space at the designated coordinates and right on time. She felt a measure of pride as she watched her bridge crew go about confirming their location and verifying it with the navigational array and astrometric sensors. Once the navigator gave her confirmation that he verified their position, she turned towards the comms officer and ordered her to send a burst transmission with the pre-arranged code and waited for the response. A few seconds later, the comms officer raised her left hand and signaled receipt and confirmation of the code by the task force waiting in null space. An agonizingly long minute crawled along as she anxiously waited for her navigator to confirm the telemetry from his counterpart in the other task force as they verified their positions. The navigator activated the main viewscreen on the forward bulkhead as they waited. Suddenly, there were a multitude of exit flashes 200,000 kilometers from the bow of her carrier, and hundreds of warships appeared at a dead stop relative to her position.
Her jaw dropped as she took in the unexpected fleet in front of her. There were dozens of Commonwealth dreadnaughts, battleships, and heavy cruisers arrayed before her, as well as an additional one hundred and twenty light cruisers, destroyers, and missile frigates. On the flanks of the main formation, there were more exit flashes, and the bridge AI started categorizing them on the screen, and she saw that they were the new Eleani and Xenxin warships that she had been hearing about. They shared a design lineage with the Commonwealth ships, but there were definite differences that became obvious as they assumed their positions next to the Commonwealth navy ships. She was particularly intrigued by the Xenxin ships, as they seemed to be bristling with weapons, almost excessively so relative to their ship sizes. The Eleani ships seemed to have taken a different design philosophy, and they gave the impression of deadly speed and grace, and she was hard-pressed to spot any obvious weapons on their hulls despite the AI confirming that the ships were indeed well-armed.
There was another coded signal from null space that appeared on the comm station panel, and her comm officer turned to her. “Vice-admiral, we have received a coded message on the sigma frequency for your eyes only that requires biometric and voice verification to decrypt.” Zhou nodded and pressed a button on her arm panel, activating the privacy screen around her chair and feeling the pressure change as the bridge around her became opaque and silent. She pressed the biometric toggle on the panel, and a retinal scanner popped out of its alcove on the side. She leaned in and scanned her right eye first, then her left. An icon appeared on the screen, and she thumbed it as it flashed and confirmed the print. Finally, she spoke and addressed the bridge AI: “Suzy, please confirm the voice command for verification.” The AI answered immediately. -Of course, Vice-Admiral Zhou, please proceed.- “Zhou, one-red-seven-green-four-tango-alpha-zero. Execute.” -Voice command verified. Thank you, Vice-Admiral Zhou.-
A small holographic display popped up in front of her; the admiral appeared on the screen, and his pre-recorded message started playing. “Mei, I know all this cloak and dagger stuff seems excessive, but we couldn’t take any chances. The receipt of this message will activate a program in your bridge AI and allow it to take control of the new drone ships waiting for you in null space. They are a new class of upgraded null ships and are top secret. Your AI will anchor them to your task force, and they will follow you, remaining hidden in null space unless you absolutely need them.”
“There are also two troopships with them that are carrying a complement of two thousand Mark XII ATS Bio-Synths and an expeditionary brigade each of rangers and pathfinders in stasis. They are also to remain in null space unless circumstances require that you need them; they are an insurance policy for an ongoing mission in Insectoid space. The details of that are top secret as well and can be accessed with your AI. If the troopships are required for that mission, they are to be escorted by a detachment of null ships and sent there immediately. After you have met your task force counterpart, there are orders in this packet that are to be accessed by you both and executed. I have the utmost faith in you, Mei, and I can’t wait to take you out to dinner again when we can both coordinate our next leave together. Thompson out.”
The hologram message disappeared, and she waited a little longer to allow the blush from his last sentence to fade from her cheeks and suppress the smile that was trying to form on her face before she put on her command mask and lowered the privacy screen. The bridge crew was going about their usual tasks, trying hard not to seem interested in her top-secret message. “Comms, open a channel to the task force flagship, please.” The comm officer acknowledged the order, and a few seconds later, the Bridge of the Commonwealth flagship appeared on the viewscreen.
A Nekuli male was sitting in the command chair, resplendent in the uniform favored by Nekuli officers. He took a moment to look around her bridge before settling his eyes on her. He bowed his head slowly in a gesture of respect, which she returned in proper fashion. The proper courtesies having been observed, he raised his eyes to meet with hers and started speaking. “Vice-Admiral Zhou. May the ancestors grant you and your clan honor and good fortune. I am deeply honored to meet you, and I hope our integration is a successful endeavor. I now entrust the honor of myself and my crew to your safekeeping.” He remained stone still as he awaited her reply, and she tried to remember the proper return greeting that she had been studying during their trip here.
“Commodore Therax, the honor is mine, and I promise you that I shall never ask you or your crew to undertake any action that will bring dishonor to your clans and your ancestors. We are now joined as one; may our cause be just and pure.” She finished the response, and the gravity of what she just promised to someone she had never met before hit her hard; it felt almost sacred to her. Commodore Therax heard her proper reply, and he stood up, followed by the rest of his bridge crew. He addressed her again. “Our honor has been given, and we have received a promise to safeguard it in return. Our joining is now consecrated in the eyes of the ancestors, and you are now our clan leader. What are your orders?
She recovered from the ordeal of the emotionally charged exchange of vows and stood up to give her first order as clan leader to the Nekuli. “I request the presence of you and your senior staff aboard my ship tonight. I will prepare a feast to honor our new friendship and alliance. I have studied your cuisine, and I have found a selection of Earth cuisine that should suit your taste. It is called tartare and sashimi; I think you will like it.” Commodore Therax looked at her dubiously, and she had to stifle a laugh at his expression as she knew that he was imagining being forced to eat vegetables and overcooked meat out of politeness. She spoke quickly to assuage his fears. “Commodore, tartare, and sashimi are raw red meat and fish; I would never inflict vegetables and burnt meat on you or your crew; are we not friends?”
As his translator finished converting her words into his language, he smiled at her, baring all of his fangs in true happiness.

First of all, I am not very knowledgable in 401k and retirement plans, so bear with me
Starting 2018, I started investing in 401k (I know, very late) and currently it is $28,000 in vested balance. It includes pre tax $10,000, roth $10,000, employee match 8,000. I quit my job in 2023 but the 401k is still with my old employer. I started my new job right after and had to wait one year to contribute in the 401k. It is now one year since employment. I was planning to rollover the funds.
I know the best option is to rollover and continue contributing with my new employer but financially, I think I will have to withdraw some money. I am going to start a new 401k with my new current employer though.
My question is since I have $10,000 in roth, would I not pay taxes if I withdraw them? I probably wont withdraw $28,000 at once but I wanted to initially take out 10,000 and little by little over time.
Would it be okay to just keep the funds as is?
I read somewhere that I can rollover to a ira account but I dont know the consequences to that.
Any advice would be appreciated

My family has always been of great minds. I hated it. Growing up and having to study day and night to try and live up to them was extremely exhausting when I couldn't care how things worked as long as I was happy. I gave up but somehow everything kept turning out to be true.
Over my lifetime I have become the Gorden Ramsey of the science world. Known for my temper and also for huge things like curing world hunger using play-doe and cancer with baby powder I got in a back street ally while drunk.
To get my family off my back I started making random ideas so they could see me as a failure and leave me alone but...they keep working. And soon people started to praise me. Fame has left me with nothing but more and more attention. So today I plan to make sure that everyone can just think I'm insane and leave me alone and not some king.
I chuckled like a kid who was opening a Christmas present as I heard the crowd of people chatting and talking loudly as I hid behind my stage in a grey tight suit that my sister had picked out. I sighed and was ready to walk out and make a fool out of myself but my brother stopped me.
" Jack... I just want you to know how proud I am of you. Dad would have loved to see you right now. "
I thought it was ironic because last night while chilling on the couch watching TV and eating chips I made this theory up. He dusted off my shoulders held them tight and looked me in the eyes taking in the moment.
" go give them hell man. "
He had a goofy smile just like Dad but spoke with confidence.
" you got it, man. "
I heard my name being called onto the stage and the uproar startled me for a second but I collected myself and headed out after giving him a nod just to entertain him.
The lights were blinding as I grabbed the mic and looked at the table in front of me with a small box with the ingredients I needed and a chalkboard behind me.
After I stood still for a minute the crowd died down. I had not told anyone what I was presenting so the whole world was watching without a clue of what I was doing this time.
"Hello everyone. Today I believe I have my most important presentation yet..."
The crowd grew silent and hung on every word. And I heard my voice around the room through the speakers.
" Today I have with me a box...and inside is spaghetti I had for breakfast. "
The crowd laughed thinking it was a joke
" shut up "
The crowd grew silent once more
"Behind me is a chalkboard and I will now present my new findings to all of you...I have found out how to make portals to other worlds. "
A man in the far back of the audience yelled bullshit in a heavy Indian accent but he was so far it was a faint sound for me. I smiled at that thinking I had finally found something that would make me lose my title and I could go ahead and live a life without people making me feel like an evil man for not helping others.
I opened the box got a handful of the noodles and threw them at the chalkboard. I then grabbed a paper towel on standby to clean myself.
The noodles hit the board and slowly moved and rested on a spot on the board. I made eye contact with my brother backstage and he had a look on his face showing he believed in me.
I spun the board dropping the noodles to the ground I then grabbed the chalk and drew around the sauce and noodles that stuck to the board then drew my attention to the others that had fallen on the floor and drew an outline of that.
After it finished I threw the chalk in the crowd violently hitting an old lady in the face.
" Quickly I want a show of hands who thinks I'm a crazy guy "
Everyone raised their hands and I laughed to myself
I then went behind the board and laid it horizontally. I grabbed a small knife in my pocket and poked my finger with it. The crimson blood fell and hit the chalk and then as more and more blood hit the chalk it started glowing.
" you have got to be joking. "
I said out loud as it started to spark an orange glow and it slowly grew color to the rest of the chalk in orange sparks.
Once the symbol was fully sparking with orange the sauce began to swell and move around in a counterclockwise manner. I stepped away from it in shock as small parts of the blood in my finger began to float to the parts where it fell on the floor I drew my outlines on and started sparking those as well.
It started to smoke and hiss as if lightning could whisper and the orange began to take shape and the sauce made a doorway. The parts that were not on the board began to grow ice around them and started to make designs on the floor circling me and the board. Suddenly it grew in size and a large booming voice was heard through the portal as I felt panic of people start to set in.
A huge claw came out and scrapped the sides of my table trying to crawl out from the world it had been trapped in. Cold winds hit me as they cut my skin and threw around my clothes. As I saw the table was now melting from its touch.
A slimy green claw with mucus like a face-hugger egg from the movie Alien carved through the floor and pulled the rest of its body out slowly. A beast stood at 12 feet tall adjusting to our world as goop grew and shaped its body as people screamed, ran, and stood frozen in fear.
As it looked around it locked its spider-like eyes and swerled around coming out from the portal and twisting and turning around the body as it made its way to its head finding a place to rest. It then locked its eyes with me and its jaw twisted slowly from an ant-like maw to mine and slowly shrunk and it soon took the shape of me and knelt on the floor and spoke to me.
" master. "
I stood in shock as everyone seemed to calm down and watched to see what I would do.
"...umm "My family has always been of great minds. I hated it. Growing up and having to study day and night to try and live up to them was extremely exhausting when I couldn't care how things worked as long as I was happy. I gave up but somehow everything kept turning out to be true.
Over my lifetime I have become the Gorden Ramsey of the science world. Known for my temper and also for huge things like curing world hunger using play-doe and cancer with baby powder I got in a back street ally while drunk.
To get my family off my back I started making random ideas so they could see me as a failure and leave me alone but...they keep working. And soon people started to praise me. Fame has left me with nothing but more and more attention. So today I plan to make sure that everyone can just think I'm insane and leave me alone and not some king.
I chuckled like a kid who was opening a Christmas present as I heard the crowd of people chatting and talking loudly as I hid behind my stage in a grey tight suit that my sister had picked out. I sighed and was ready to walk out and make a fool out of myself but my brother stopped me.
" Jack... I just want you to know how proud I am of you. Dad would have loved to see you right now. "
I thought it was ironic because last night while chilling on the couch watching TV and eating chips I made this theory up. He dusted off my shoulders held them tight and looked me in the eyes taking in the moment.
" go give them hell man. "
He had a goofy smile just like Dad but spoke with confidence.
" you got it, man. "
I heard my name being called onto the stage and the uproar startled me for a second but I collected myself and headed out after giving him a nod just to entertain him.
The lights were blinding as I grabbed the mic and looked at the table in front of me with a small box with the ingredients I needed and a chalkboard behind me.
After I stood still for a minute the crowd died down. I had not told anyone what I was presenting so the whole world was watching without a clue of what I was doing this time.
"Hello everyone. Today I believe I have my most important presentation yet..."
The crowd grew silent and hung on every word. And I heard my voice around the room through the speakers.
" Today I have with me a box...and inside is spaghetti I had breakfast. "
The crowd laughed thinking it was a joke
" shut up "
The crowd grew silent once more
"Behind me is a chalkboard and I will now present my new findings to all of you...I have found out how to make portals to other worlds. "
A man in the far back of the audience yelled bullshit in a heavy Indian accent but he was so far it was a faint sound for me. I smiled at that thinking I had finally found something that would make me lose my title and I could go ahead and live a life without people making me feel like an evil man for not helping others.
I opened the box got a handful of the noodles and threw them at the chalkboard. I then grabbed a paper towel on standby to clean myself.
The noodles hit the board and slowly moved and rested on a spot on the board. I made eye contact with my brother backstage and he had a look on his face showing he believed in me.
I spun the board dropping the noodles to the ground I then grabbed the chalk and drew around the sauce and noodles that stuck to the board then drew my attention to the others that had fallen on the floor and drew an outline of that.
After it finished I threw the chalk in the crowd violently hitting an old lady in the face.
" Quickly I want a show of hands who thinks I'm a crazy guy "
Everyone raised their hands and I laughed to myself
I then went behind the board and laid it horizontally. I grabbed a small knife in my pocket and poked my finger with it. The crimson blood fell and hit the chalk and then as more and more blood hit the chalk it started glowing.
" you have got to be joking. "
I said out loud as it started to spark an orange glow and it slowly grew color to the rest of the chalk in orange sparks.
Once the symbol was fully sparking with orange the sauce began to swell and move around in a counterclockwise manner. I stepped away from it in shock as small parts of the blood in my finger began to float to the parts where it fell on the floor I drew my outlines on and started sparking those as well.
It started to smoke and hiss as if lightning could whisper and the orange began to take shape and the sauce made a doorway. The parts that were not on the board began to grow ice around them and started to make designs on the floor circling me and the board. Suddenly it grew in size and a large booming voice was heard through the portal as I felt panic of people start to set in.
A huge claw came out and scrapped the sides of my table trying to crawl out from the world it had been trapped in. Cold winds hit me as they cut my skin and threw around my clothes. As I saw the table was now melting from its touch.
A slimy green claw with mucus like a face-hugger egg from the movie Alien carved through the floor and pulled the rest of its body out slowly. A beast stood at 12 feet tall adjusting to our world as goop grew and shaped its body as people screamed, ran, and stood frozen in fear.
As it looked around it locked its spider-like eyes and swerled around coming out from the portal and twisting and turning around the body as it made its way to its head finding a place to rest. It then locked its eyes with me and its jaw twisted slowly from an ant-like maw to mine and slowly shrunk and it soon took the shape of me and knelt on the floor and spoke to me.
" master. "
I stood in shock as everyone seemed to calm down and watched to see what I would do.

"...umm "

Part two of the noodle demon.
Now that this creature knelt before me I realized that the room I was in was so terrible quietly you could hear everyone's ass get tight in anticipation of what would happen next.
" ...what...are you. "
I spoke carefully to the being that had taken the shape of myself. It still took my breath away and my throat was dry.
The beast was a deep green. The color mixed with shades of grey streaming from it. The longer I looked at it I could see it getting closer to what I looked like shaping itself.
From small flowing green tendrils to an arm they grew as they twisted and made bone then muscle and finally skin.
It locked eyes with me and it smiled deeply at me. As it formed the face finally.
" Your vassle. "
My eyes had not moved to the crowd at all but even though the lights hit the stage so hard it was enveloped in smoke.
The creature's eyes glowed as it answered brightly, not figuratively. This thing's eyes were glowing.
"To serve you, We are bound by blood magic. I am a reflection of your desires, Master, " it said, its voice now a whisper in my mind.
It began to stand up as my grey suit began to form on it and by the time it stood fully up it had copied what I looked like.
" let me explain everything. "
My body frozen in fear woke up with adrenaline as I blinked and a flash of green smoke covered my vision as he teleported right to me face to face.
Its body turned to smoke and went into the slits of my eyes. I felt visions follow me in my peripheral vision but surprisingly no pain followed power filled me and it felt like one hell of a drug.
My body and mind altered.
I was now in a very dark place with no walls or light except my reflection on the floor which waved like water.
I took a step back looking around and back to the reflection of me on the ground.
Soon the water rippled and my reflection fell through the floor like gravity was inverted. he flew upright and water fell off of him as he looked at me as he now stood straight ahead of me. He was just reflecting in the water but now eyed me down.
Collecting my nerves.
I begin to speak.
" what do you want..."
He was still in my form and stood perfectly straight. Now with water dripping from his...my hair.
Slight stubble with hair that hung down and my hazel eyes were not present within him but I was greeted with a swelling acidic green that doubled the size of my pupil.
" to serve you. "
He made no other movement than putting his hands behind his back like a soldier at ease.
I could not tell if it was lying or not.
" ...is that it? "
" I am the embodiment of your fear desires and brilliance. You have shaped me. Your desire for solitude birthed me. I will aid you in shaping the world how you see fit. Your reality becomes mine. "
There was a slight echo in the room as he spoke.
" wait...where are we "
I questioned haphazardly
" your mind. "
An awkward silence was in the air until I spoke
" so...am I just standing on the stage not making a sound? "
He gave me a concerned look.
" no...time has frozen outside for you. You may sleep here without having to in the real world so to others you look as if you never rest and you may think and plan what to do in battle here. For them, it will be about two seconds...Do...do you not have any knowledge of what I am? "
Suddenly I felt bad like I had encountered someone famous and I had no idea who they were. A slap in the face like a popular kid meeting someone who had never heard of them. Ego shattered.
" ok sorry no. I...don't go around reading about...monsters?"
I felt like was I saying the n-word of the demon realm not knowing if that word was offensive.
He folded his arms a little upset.
"Are you not a warrior? "
" well...no I...just watch TV and cook here and there- "
The demon cut me off
" weak. "
" excuse me? "
" look. I am an immortal being and after a while you get bored. So I'm sorry if I may be a little upset after being bonded with some nobody. "
I got quiet and I was a little annoyed that I was being roasted by some demon that I just met.
Its form wavers and eyes begin to open on its skin. Cheeks forhead etc.
"After being a god for so long it's fun to play with limitations. Makes things extremely exciting. "
" what do you mean by that? "
" look. You can only be so entertained by the same things. Life gets boring and now...you are going to help me with this. I get to have pure entertainment while you get every wish you could ever want. A mutual bond no? "
He then closed his eyes annoyed and the other eyes meshed back to his skin.
" though... the TV is not that interesting...life is what gets the blood pumping"
I felt the need to quickly change the topic
"Are there others like you? "
The room began to take shape very slowly as the water floor turned to wood and walls went around us.
" of course. You may meet them one day "
Confused and curious I pressed.
"Meet them? "
" yes. Summoning one of us is considered a threat to them. "
He spoke while opening and closing his newly found hand except backward.
" hm...no that don't look right "
I quickly responded
" Wait! How is doing that a threat! "
"Well, one doesn't just accidentally Summon one of us to suddenly get powers beyond human control. "
I thought back to how I summoned him by accident with some food I made.
" well...funny story but I summoned you using my breakfast..."
I had never regretted speaking so much as in that moment.
" What... "
Acid dripped from his words. Literally. His pupils split in half and his bottom jaw ripped open like an ant and curved giving sharpness to the bone.
"Please don't kill me. "
The room began to look like a cozy cabin with a fireplace and he slowly went back to normal.
" I would if I could. I've never felt so disrespected. We are bonded by your blood. If you die...I die. "
Suddenly I felt at ease by this new information.
Then a thought came to my mind
" ...God's can die? "
" you did hear me, right? "
The SAS from this guy was unneeded and I was starting to miss him being on his knees as weird as that sounds.
" so...all that power gone.... in an instant... "
" well...no actually God's powers don't just disappear they transfer to whoever killed them...wait...hold up."
He suddenly had an epiphany.
A smile grew on his face and he grabbed my shoulders
" you! You are going to help me kill the other gods! "
He sounded proud but I let him down.
" ha! No. "
" oh come on! Don't be like that. "
He did a pout.
"Look, man. I'm not killing gods for you. Just because you are bored. "
" hey...they might send people to kill you because you bonded with me. "
"What did I ever do to them? "
"They have a system to this stuff. They like to build and watch things play out. You're a problem. That can mess it up. So...they kill ya...to be honest, I don't know any other way to explain it, man. You know people normally just use my power to kill people and become a king and know this already. "
"This is outrageous. "
" bro. Look if you do this I will be able to get their powers and you will be able to do so much more than what I offer "
I tilted my head
" what can you do? Know what never mind. I will just talk to them and figure things out. "
He groaned and his form melted down sagging and it shot back up reforming
"Is there not anything that you want? Anything in the world? Gods don't put themselves in physical forms. They give people power and can make beings to hunt you. And if they care enough to come down themself. Ha, good luck."
I stopped and thought about it trying to weigh the options of pissing off higher beings.
Suddenly. I found something.
"Can you bring back the dead..."
He stopped confused.
" well...no "
" then I don't want anything "
" wait! "
He threw his arms out pleading
"I don't...but another God does..."
He crosses his arms smiling. He had left the question hanging letting me reconsider his offer.
I stopped and thought for a while before looking back up to him.
I let out a sigh and looked him in the eyes
" ok...you are going to help me get my father back. "
The demon smirked.

So I walked in to Wendy’s for a pick up order. Usually I have my door dash bag but this time I didn’t, I had another insulated bag I was using. (No name on it) I waited for the order, checked to make sure and the manger began yelling at me. Stating she cannot give me the order unless I have the door dash bag. I showed her my phone how everything matched the receipt they have. She continued to tell me she cannot give me the order. After a solid five minutes, she finally hands me the order and says “next time I won’t give you the order.”
I’ve never had this happen!! I also use Uber for deliveries and they don’t even give you a bag. 😵‍💫

Original content and also I am not a doctor so take this with a humongous grain of garlic on top of Aramark garlic fries.
Fernando Tatis Jr. suffered a left shoulder subluxation in April 2021. In layman's terms, that's a partial dislocation of the shoulder joint.
He went on to dislocate it three more times that season.
He would usually do it with one-handed follow throughs on swings. With this being JHL's left arm and being a leftie batter, I don't think that same phenomenon would be an issue. It's probably a matter of it during his violent swings in general.
In October 2021 he actually opted against surgery because he wanted to play and not miss extended time. However when he got suspended 80 games for a banned substance, he changed his tune and decided to get the surgery.
"How I was feeling a little bit, coming back, I wasn't the best version out there,” Tatis said at the time. “A couple games, it got in the way. I was thinking and not diving headfirst, not doing my stereotypical movement. I feel like when I come back and start everything all over, I need to be 100% so I can do what I know how to do."
His questionable use of adjectives aside, it seemed like he wasn't 100% comfortable. Interestingly enough, Bob Melvin was his manager at the time, and he had this to say:
"From my understanding, I think everybody was hoping at some point in time he'd have it done. So he is. I think, as far as the medical staff goes, and even now himself, I think he realizes, 'Let's get this stuff cleaned up before I come back and play.'"
Now, what does this mean for Jung Hoo Lee?
First of all, this is entirely spectulation from a similar injury for a completely different person and player, and secondly, we should wait for the MRI results.
But simply to speculate, if the MRI is somewhat clean, it isn't out of the question--as evidenced by Tatis's case--that Jung Hoo Lee plays again this season.
Will he be uncomfortable, if we consider Tatis Jr.'s experience? Possible. Would he eventually need surgery anyways? Also possible.
All in all, I found this interesting and somewhat a glimmer of hope.
Most notably to me, Tatis looks really good after he came back. I'm not as concerned for JHL's career beyond this season especially given that he's a very young 25.
Don't get me wrong--this is still very disheartening, but there is recent MLB precedent that all hope isn't lost.
But again, we probably should let the doctors do the talking tomorrow.

Relationship help?
help!!!!! im so confused
i 14m like this girl in the samw year as me. but its so confusing so i’ll tell u the story first. (its a long one)
I’m from England and so is the girl i like. lets call her Julie. and we go to the same high school. one year an opportunity for an exchange was brought up. In October we’d spend 10 days at our exchange partner’s house in America and go to their school and go round the island learning about different things. Before this, i’d wanted to know who Julie was etc. and I’d kept her at the back of my mind. To my luck, Julie was also going to go on the exchange (There were 30 of us and there are 300 people in my year.) So after the snapchat group chat was made I very smoothly 🤣 slided into Julie’s DM’s. We just talked loads instantly and we were yet to talk in real life. (She is in the other half of the year so we didn’t have any classes.) Meeting after meeting about the trip and we still hadn’t talked. Eventually, the trip arrived and we were headed to heathrow from a local airprot and Heathrow to the airport in america. In the security bit we finally spoke. Julie made a joke as I scurried around trying to be as quick as possible. From there we just kept talking and we even talked on the plane (when she woke up). She was sat behind me and I was sat with a friend and us three talked.
I can’t remember all the details but basically, throughout the whole trip me and her talked the whole time and people always shipped us if you get what I mean. However, I do remember the airport back. We had a three hour wait time I think at the american airport. and we were going around in small groups of four or five and I just spontaneously chose to go around with Julie. Julie was with two of her other friends but we spent the whole three hours making tiktoks and laughing and joking about and we both really enjoyed it. Finally, we were back home and we proceeded to text until school came by again. This is where another recently solved problem comes around.
The last day of the trip there was a massive party and I met this girl lets call Bella. Me and Bella started texting from there and sort of started liking each other. By this point I really really liked Julie and never stopped thinking about her but never knew if she felt the same and was very cautious about it. However, me and Bella kind of died down after a week or so.
So it was back to me putting my full effort into liking Julie. At school we didn’t talk much be exchange the few words whenever I saw her. I was really nervous around her in real life and tried to do my best to make it discreet I liked her and directed my attention elsewhere while still having full attention on her. Yet we texted like crazy and full on as well. We would always joke around and call each other names jokingly and we were really really friendly. We didn’t talk as much in January and February but picked up again in March. I still really really really liked her again and in April we shared our ambitions and they pretty much matched up and we shared our ‘types’ and we described each other but were completely clueless we liked each other. It got a bit confusing because she liked me ( I later found out in June/July) but also mentioned this other guy so I got confused and then in June it got really really messy.
You remember Bella right? Well the American kids all came over to England this time and stayed with us. On the first few days me and Bella didn’t talk however we did one day and we kicked about a ball on a field where everyone on the exchange was hanging out after we had a football match. From there me and Bella hung out a lot together and did stuff together in class activities. We really liked each other and I no longer liked Julie. (It’s really important to keep in mind me and Bella didn’t know each other deeply etc.) However my feeling for Julie still remained a bit but slowly died out even when I still liked Bella the first few days. Anyways, me and Bella had held hands a few times etc. and when Bella went we hugged a lot. We weren’t into a relationship and a few days later we stated ‘talking’ (A state in which the relationship is similar to a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship but is not official.) and we called a lot. However a few problems arose when me and Bella discovered each other’s emotions and how we live and what we live by. It was present she was over reactive, over protective, quite mean (For example I’d talk about my day and she wouldn’t care and she’d talk about hers.), she also talked to a lot of other boys oddly (For example she blocked me sometimes and a few days later my friend was at the top of her best friend-list with a 😗 next to his name.) and she always had excuses. It just didn’t work for me and I wasn’t happy at all. Prior to me and Bella stopping talking me and Julie started to text again.
me and julie started to text again in about july 2023. (idk). julie had just got out of a relationship in august so i only started liking her again in september 2023. i tood my friends and obviously word spread but i always said i didnt infront of her so idk if she knew or not. anyway we still texted alot however another guy liked her who also texted her and there was a bit of competition. for a few months i didnt even know if i liked her, some days i would, some days i wouldnt and i was really conflicted. now, the ither guy and her dont really text much and so im not really bothered. we still both text each other loads and weve had eachother st the top of our best friends list for two weeks😂😂. anyways i have no idea if she likes me or not but i like her and were like best friends. feel free to ask any questions.
By the way the girl from american is completely out the picture. Julie doesnt know i like her.

I am neha ( 26 f ) , I am here to vent and get some suggestions or maybe even a real friend . This is a story of how I ruined my love life and destroyed the man who meant everything to me . We grew up in Coimbatore , i first met my boyfriend when I was in 11th grade , I actually saw him in a video , it was a Facebook video made by his friends , one of his friend proposed a girl , so they made a video of it , he was there in it too . He is tall , above 6ft , he looked ok , normal , a bit weird too with his specs and curl hair . He didn’t stand out , after few days I saw in a local chat place , he was with his friend , all sweaty , they came from gym . I recognised him immediately though. I saw him sneakily , idk why , after going home I sent him a request to his Insta . We started talking the same night , he said he saw me too , we connected way too fast , he was very funny and practical, we became best friends very soon , we almost spoke daily , in that following year we became so close, there wasn’t anything sexual , we just talk about our day and our lives daily , then he got into a relationship with a girl , I liked her too , life was so easy and fun back then , after we got into college , I Started to date a guy in my college , but we didn’t stop talking , nothing changed between us , after going to college we started getting drunk and smoking up , it was all new and we all did it almost everyday in first year , it was pretty fun . The guy I was with that time , didn’t really smoke up that much , he got drunk but he didn’t smoke pot that much , but the rest of us gathered everyday to smoke pot and play carrom . We both even meet at night to just smoke up and listen to music . At the end of the first year , one day he called me one evening and told me that he wanted to meet me , he sounded very low , I was with my my boyfriend and his friends that time but I left there immediately,booked an auto and Met him at a usual place near an IT park , we drink coffee and smoke cigarettes there usually.he was already there when I went in , he saw me and smiled but that looked very sad , he told me that his girlfriend kissed someone , a distant cousin of her actually , she kissed him in a moment and texted her girlfriend about it , she mentioned that she regrets it very much , I can’t stand it , I don’t know what to do , I feel nauseous, stuff like that . He showed the screenshots , he didn’t talk much he just smiled but that killed me . I was so angry on her , I didn’t even know what to do to make him feel better at that moment, I said she is not worth it , don’t worry , things like that . He didn’t talk about it after that , he changed the topic and he just sat there for 30-40 mins just smoking thinking about something. We speak almost daily and I know everything about him , he told me when they first had sex , we speak about everything, just not anything sexual to each other , when I saw him like this , I was feeling only rage , I was so angry on her , I don’t understand why she kissed some other guy , after getting into that relationship he was very loyal , I know how loyal he was , he even got a tattoo of her initials , but when he knew about this kiss , it made him so sad I guess . After 2 hours , we went home . I called her as soon as I went home , i scolded her so much , she started crying and told me that it was a mistake, she sounded very regretful too , she cried so much , I couldn’t bring myself to be mean after that .but that night i couldn’t sleep , my ex called me all night but I didn’t pick his call , I kept texting him , we used to text in Snapchat daily , I kept sending him texts and he texted me back to , he said he is going to get drunk and pass out , I also felt that’s better , after some days she even cut her hand , like scratches with knife on wrists , she was very regretful too , then somehow they didn’t break up , he wanted to after that but she didn’t let him , but gradually it got ok , but after this we started to speak and meet more frequently than before , I started to drop him in my college , both of our colleges are in same road , we started going in one vehicle daily. Mostly I drove , we speak all the time about nothing , even when we were going on my scooty , we just make fun of people in road , we laughed , had fun . One day he even pressed my breasts accidentally, side of my breast . I started neglecting my ex , that guy I dated that time , after few months , people started to notice , but still we didn’t care . (I actually come off from a well doing family , my family has enough money but my parents have a very unsuccessful marriage, they don’t even speak to each other , I have a younger sister and elder sister . My elder sister is married , my younger sister difference is 3 years . My parents doesn’t speak to each other , my mom openly says that they are together only for the kids . ) I loved being with him , he made me feel safe , comfortable and it’s always warm when I’m with him . We smoked pot all the time though , it was so fun , we even bunked college went to room and just smoked pot and watched anime all day . One day my ex boyfriend and his friends were in Ooty and they wanted me to come , I said I’ll come with him , I can’t come alone , and I asked him to come . We rolled some joints and started to go in his bike , we went a beautiful ride , stopped and smoked up in between, after we reached there I went with my ex boyfriend. We all smoked up that night got drunk , he usually doesn’t talk that much , but all of us were drunk and it was chill , some of my friends like him some don’t , but it’s all chill . We stayed in a tent stay there , that night I was with my ex , he wanted to make out , we kissed and did some stuff but I just felt restless and distracted, I kept thinking about him and my ex was a drunk too , it didn’t turn me on , after some time he passed out . I went out and went to his tent to see him if he is asleep , but he wasn’t there , then I started to look for him and I found him near the fire place , he was smoking up there alone with a phone in his hand , he was just singing this song 7 years by Lucas I think , he was singing along with a joint in his hand , he saw me coming , smiled but he didn’t stop singing, I can see him feeling even little embarrassed, but he looked so happy and free . I sat down there started to smoke up with him . After sometime I asked him why haven’t even kissed even once , I just asked him in a fun way but he got all serious all of a sudden , he saw me straight in the eyes and told me that he would love to kiss me , I literally felt butterflies in my lower tummy , my hips felt all tight too , idk , I still remember everything though . I kissed him in an instant, I kinda rushed in and kissed him, it felt magical . We kissed for a long time , we just kissed , nothing else . But I loved it , after sometime we separated, he saw me smiled and said I tasted sweet and bitter with weed taste . But my heart was beating so fast that time , I wanted to make out with him right there , I’ve felt horny before but he was the only guy made me feel like this , I tried to kiss him again but he stopped me and told me im drunk and asked me to go sleep . Next morning they asked me to go with them but my mind was fully on that kiss , I came back to cbe in his bike , we didn’t talk anything for the first time I just hugged him on the way back , it was nice too . I thought about plans to break up with my ex , after he dropped me home I kept thinking about the kiss , things got normal after a few days , we were like before but we started to flirt a bit , I started to call him baby and it gradually became very intimate . One day in a movie I kissed him again and he kissed me back too , we started making out bit by bit , it developed into a place where he started to grope me while im driving , I enjoyed every bit of that , I broke up with that guy I was with but he was still with that girl . Around final year first semester end they broke up too . We had intercourse the next day , it was amazing , I loved everything about him and the best thing is he is my best friend too . We rented a place for us by college end , we had sex every single day , it was the best , I loved staying with him . After this there was covid and we had to stay in our place , for one whole year I lived with him happily, he never let me down even once , he was already very caring from beginning but after we got committed , he really did treated me like a princess . He didn’t speak much but his actions were most considerate , we both worked remotely and having the time of our life , two years went by , I was happy and fullfilled , at the end of third year he quit his job and tried to get a different better job with extra good pay , 3 months passed by , one day few friends of mine from my work visited our place , they told me about opportunity to work in chennai for a month , I took it and went to chennai for a month , he dropped me to bus and sent me off to chennai . We spoke daily but not that much , I went out with my friends daily got drunk , just having fun . Some of my friends think my boyfriend is beneath me , one even said that I deserve better , she said he didn’t even get a job in three months joked and asked me whether I am the one who’s paying rent , actually he never asked me rent or money , he always paid for everything , but that time when they were joking I didn’t defend him , I still couldn’t believe that I didn’t say anything . In that week I met a guy , he came with my friends , he flirted with me when I was there , after I went back to PG I got a text from this guy , he got my number from my friends it seems . After some texts I responded and we started texting ,i liked the attention I think idk , I was talking to my boyfriend daily too , but somehow he noticed that I am not ok , he asked me about it and I said it was work issue and I am tired , 3^rd weekend I met that guy alone , he wanted to have a drink and I went , I slept with him that night , to be honest the sex wasn’t good , when he got inside me I felt darkness , I swear . Idk why I did it , after sex that guy slept in a second , I saw him lying down and I felt like killing myself , I left to my pg in midnight , I booked a cab and went back . I saw my snap notifications from him but I couldn’t open it , I blocked that guy’s number , I went to pg , cried myself to sleep . Next morning I spoke to my boyfriend , told him that I got cold and resting today , he told me that he got a job as a business manager for a US IT firm , he sounded so happy and told me that he called yesterday night to tell me this . I was crying so hard when he was on the phone , at that moment I swear I even fogot the face of that I slept with , he asked me to get rest and I hung up . I couldn’t talk to him , I felt so guilty and ashamed , as I was thinking this I get a notification my swiggy that he placed order to my pg , he bought soup . I broke down , it was like everything is telling me how big mistake I made , suddenly my thought went to that day he told me about his ex’s kiss , I can see that sad smile . I decided not to tell him and love him more and more , he had his birthday in 15 days I wanted to do something for him . When I came back from chennai , he picked me , he was so happy to see me , he spoke about his new job to me on the way , he was like a child , maybe cause he missed me for a month , I can see that he is so happy like silly child just to see me , after going home I had sex with him , I even rimmed him and I kinda liked it , it was the best sex we had , I felt alive and also very guilty . I treated him better and better to ease my guilt , but this made him very happy , I arranged a small party with my sister ,his friends and my mom .the day before his birthday we got drunk he asked me why I am not being adamant like before , ‘enna kadhal ha ‘ (joking sayin I am so in love) he joked about how afetr five years we can get super rich and start a family , I melted hearing all this .i promised myself that I will never let him down . but ha ha This is why I think karma is a bitch , at the noon of his birthday I got a text from that guy saying that he is thinking about that night . He heard the notification took the phone to pass it to me , he just saw the phone simply , just a glance and he just stopped and opened the text , I was blowing up balloons opposite of him , I saw his face and my heart sank , he came closer and gave me the phone , he didn’t speak anything , I opened my phone in a panic , saw the text and I saw him , he asked me ‘ so you slept with some guy ? ‘ , I didn’t reply , my whole mind got blank , I felt like I was gonna faint , he just saw me and said why . Of all these years I knew him I never saw him cry , but now his voice was shaking , he just asked me ‘ yen ‘ (why in tamil) . I saw tears on his eyes , I can see his eyes becoming lifeless in a matter of minutes , I tried to hug him but he just moved away , no matter how much we fight , when I hug him , he gets all cute and lovely , but he just moved away in an instinct . He then came forward hugged me tightly , he said ‘ sorry ‘ . I still don’t know why he said sorry , but that sounded so weak to me , he is my everything and I hurt him , I know everything about him and I still fucked up . He hugged me for some more time , I knew this warmth might be the last thing . After few mins , he rubbed his eyes in my dress , saw me smiled the same way . But it felt more like he is laughing at himself , I watched my 6 ft man walking out of the room , I just stood there alone , and I felt very cold , I remember that cold everyday , evening people came for the party and he got ready and cut the cake , fed me the first piece , my mom and sister was there too , he behaved very good , spoke with my family , but I can see that he is broke , but he still made it through the night , I went to speak with him that night , but he said he can’t . he said ‘ please I can’t ‘ . I choked hearing his voice , he went to terrace , I didn’t sleep at all that night , I walked around our little one bhk apartment , I smoked two packs of cigs that night , I went to check on him in the terrace by 4 , he was sleeping there on the floor , he hugs himself in sleep and its so cold , I cried watching him , just one day ago he was being silly like a kid talking about future family , now he is there alone , heartbroken . Morning usually he makes coffee and rolls one , I made coffee and rolled one , waited for him to come down . He came down saw me and smiled , but its not the cheerful smile , it just hurt so bad watching him like that , he drank the coffee , smoked up with me , even told me its good. Then he got ready , I cooked but he said he can’t eat , he is not hungry , that morning was so silent , he cheers up with he sees me , he was my biggest fan , now he left home with just saying bye . I got a text from him that aftrn asking me to move back to my mom’s if possible , I was dead . I couldn’t say no , I hurt him , he didn’t even scold me , he even requested me , I can only say yes . I asked him that I want to stay one more night , he said ok like always . That night I asked him to cuddle with me , he said ok , he wanted that too it seems , we just hugged in silent , he slept off quickly , he always told me that when I sleep with him it makes him stressfree and he gets a good night sleep . He was asleep on my breasts , I saw him sleeping and I couldn’t stop my tears , realising that this is the last time , I made a stupid mistake , but everything felt unimportant now , I saw him sleeping and I kissed him on his cheek , must have whispered sorry a 100 times , our four years relationship came through my mind , I realize that he made sure I was happy in every way he knew , I proposed him , I made him fall for me , now I broke his heart . I didb’t sleep that night too , morning I dozed off , when I woke up he wasn’t there, he made juice for me and left for work . I packed some of my stuff and went to my mom’s . when I stepped out of our little home , I broke down and cried . I went home and cried , I told my mom we fought , but my sister knew something was up , she tried to ask him but he said it was a small fight , I confessed to her that night , I still remember seeing her confused look , she is a gen z kid , but even she gave me a look of confusion , she didn’t understand how I could do that , she liked my boyfriend very much , she was almost proud of him . But when she knew I cheated on him , she felt disgusted I think . Our sister bind kind of broke too that night . My life was dull , I missed him every second , I missed talking to him , I missed his smell , everything . I just focused on work , two months went by with no contact . I saw him near IT park at our spot one day, he looked like he was sick , he lost weight , his eyes are dry , he looked so pale . I saw him from a distance and I couldn’t believe my eyes , my baby looked so weak and sick , he was having a coffe and smoking a cig alone at the place we used to sit . My eyes teared up watching him , he looked so lonely . None of my friends knew we broke up because I cheated , he specifically asked me not to say anything to anyone . I didn’t speak to him that day , I couldn’t . I was full with guilt . After going home I called his friends and asked how he was and they said that they lost all contact with him and he is ghosting everybody . I broke him and also made him alone , I seriously considered killing myself but I was a coward . After a month , when I was in office , my mom got a diabities issue and fainted , my sister called him in a hurry , he came immediatiely and admitted mom in hospital , when I came there I saw him with a plastic cover with insulins for my mom . After my elder siter came , he left , he asked me to call with updates . Before leaving he asked me why I cheated , he said “ is it because I am not satisfying you “ or “ you wanted a emotial support “. when he said that , I just stood there , I can see his face , hiding a humiliation , I never had a sex issue with him , I loved being with him , but my baby asked me this , I felt ashamed . I couldn’t face him , I just stood there , he said never mind and left . I stood there seeing him leave ,but I didn’t give up , I started texting and snapping so much and somehow I made him talk to me normally , but his eyes has lost its color, he looks like he is tired of everything . After few days we both got drunk and alone , I kissed him as soon as I got the chance , he kissed me back too , usually when he kisses , he hold me ears , looks me in the eyes and kiss me , he did the same out of the habit , as soon as our eyes locked , he bursted out in tears , I truly felt how much this man loved me and how much I hurt him , he wanted to do more but he stopped himself , when he burst into tears, my heart completely broke , I hate myself so much , I hate my friends for fucking up my mind , I hate that guy . My man is gettting punished for giving everything to me , its been a year , he changed , he looks lean , unhealthy , I even think his hair is falling , almost like a zombie . I would glady kill myself for him , I just want him to be happy , I destroyed the only person I love , I see how devastating this can get for him, he looks so weak , I can’r accept it . I should’ve defended him when they joked about him . Its all my fault , its been a year and I still can;t go back to him , I can’t imagine another guy to raise my kids , I want him . Help me .

Hello,
Can someone help me understand the criteria that uber drivers and cabify drivers accept rides? I waited for nearly 30 minutes independencia mall between both platforms trying to get a ride that should take 5-10 minutes. I ended up walking back after getting tired of waiting.
Was it the location? Do they not like picking up from the mall? Or was it timing? (Around 7 PM)
I realize taking a taxi would’ve also been an option. They are typically not my first choice though because I struggle to explain where I want to go and am concerned about being an easy target for the less-honest drivers due to my low level of Spanish.
Thanks for any insight you can provide.

Before i start, I should state that I'm an 18 year old male. My ex is a female and year younger.
I posted on here about 4 months ago after my breakup with my ex of 5 months. But after a while i decided to delete the post. The sum of the post was that our relationship was at the best it's ever been and she ended it out of no where one night, saying she thinks she might be a lesbian. I supported her decision no matter how much it hurt to hear, because i loved her so so much. I was spiraling and thinking whether or not i wait for her to come back after she finds herself due to her concerns that she might go on this journey and realize she's actually not a lesbian, but if she wanted to come back, i wouldn't be here. Anyway, i still have the text so i'll repost the story on my profile after this post if you was read it.
But let's cut to now. It's been 4 months since. And I'm still not over it. It was my first ever heartbreak, which i know tends to stick with you no matter what. But I really saw her as perfect. I felt she was the best girl for me, and i tried my best to be the best guy for her. She's the sweetest, kindest, person i've ever met. She was also incredibly beautiful to me. Anyway, i can go on and on about her but I'll just explain my feelings.
Over the past 4 months i've never stopped struggling. i still think of her every single day. and every time i feel like im making good progress at getting over her, something happens that places me back to square one. For Example, for the past few weeks i've been trending towards getting better! But 2 nights ago, i had a weird dream that included her, painted in the most wonderful light, accentuating her beauty and all her good qualities. and me, i suppose metaphorically chasing after her. this isn't the first time this exact thing has happened either. i have dreams of her all the time.
Last Night, i couldn't sleep due to my mind racing. I couldn't get her out of my mind. So i did something that i probably shouldn't have. i looked through memories from when we were together. But it surprisingly made me smile and laugh more than anything. i was truly happy for the first time when i was with her. and it's all memories and screenshots now.
I somehow reached this level of peace afterwards. imagining being with her. and i felt happy. it was almost like a hallucination or a lucid dream. it was weird, but i felt amazing. but now, im back to this helpless feeling.
Sorry for being all over the place, but what im trying to get to is that... I just don't know what to do. I've tried moving on by looking for new people, but every single one ends up failing. and every time i start to get in my feelings about my ex, i run away from talking to anyone bc it's not fair to them. I'm not gonna say i have no one to talk to about this, bc i do. But i don't want to overwhelm anyone like my mom for example with all of this (so i'm running to reddit 😭).
So do i keep trying to get over her? or do i maybe try to inch back to talking to her? that's really scary but, if i have the slightest chance to get her back i'll do it. even though there hasn't been any signs of that being a possibility.
I would just love some advice on this from people who have been through a similar situation, because i really can't shake this helpless feeling i have when i think about her. I'll answer any questions you have for me about this, because i know this post is all over the place and probably confusing. sorry about that :/

I have been with this man for 3 years, there is a 15 year age gap between me and him. I’ve left him twice already and want to leave for good this time. But he never leaves the house and when he does we only have one set of keys so one person has to let the other in or the other can’t leave which leaves the house unlocked. In the past he has chocked me, punched me, kicked me, intimidated and verbally abuses me everyday. His temper is that of a goldfishes memory. And on top of that he never remembers what he did to me after an argument so I never get an apology. With me working full time I’m constantly gone. So what do I do? I was supposed to leave today but guess who decided to cancel his once a blue moon plans because I was home. -_-
I’m considering biting the bullet and having a heart to heart conversation and hopefully he’ll let me go easy since I’ve never actually broken up with him. The other option is continuing to wait or gathering things little by little and leaving my cat as the last thing I grab.
I have an apartment but he doesn’t let me go there ever so I basically live with him.

I currently own a 2016 Hyundai Sonata SE, 135,000 miles & I have reason to believe I have Rod bearing failure & which it is a Theta II engine . For the past year I have gone through a lot of oil, I’ve had to replace spark plugs twice, I had a combustion chamber cleaning done & afterwards my vehicle STILL consumed a lot of oil . I’ve been in and out of the dealership and have also taken it to my mechanic time and time & which he’s the one who helped me discover the issue in the first place . My car has been at a Hyundai dealership for the past 2 weeks bc I was driving & my engine had a misfire . The dealership has diagnosed my vehicle with a broken exhaust valve and stated “more than likely burnt valve out on this” . I’ve spent the past year trying to tell my dealership that I feel I have rod bearing failure due to my symptoms & all they’ve told me is I have to wait for the engine to completely fail . So in a sense I feel the engine is now failing . I’ve spent the past 2 weeks going back and forth with corporate & the dealership its at, I had a case manager who was supposed to be reaching out to the dealership with my concerns over my rod bearing failure . My case manager said they’d get in contact with dealership about all of this and try to work out a resolution & which the dealership says they’ve heard nothing from them because they’re having issues with receiving voicemails. Therefore my case manager lied to me about contacting them and which I confronted him on the phone about it and he only told me that nothing can be done because this issue isn’t directly related to rod bearing failure but how do they know? All the symptoms are there outside of them getting the knock sensor reading . I’ve spoken with another Hyundai dealership which is who I usually take my vehicle to but due to the fact they’re so far in the hole trying to replace so many other engines I couldn’t wait until July 9th to have my vehicle looked at . I did ask them their thoughts on it all and they told me it’s a gamble because yes my engine is failing but until it actually fails this issue specifically can’t be covered under warranty . My biggest issue is once the shop fixes & replaces my broken valve along w gaskets & any other “affected cylinder valves and ALL valve seals” per the dealership it’s at now, what if my engine decides to completely give out on me a week or 2 later due to the rod bearing failure? So not only have i came 100s of dollars out of pocket between oil I’ve paid for, spark plugs replaced, & the combustion chamber cleaning but I now have to pay $3,700 out of pocket for them to fix this just for it to fail completely in a matter of time . Even after talking to a couple other ppl who are lower position wise through Hyundai outside of my case manager they’ve stated to me I have an affected engine but nothing can be done until engine completely fails. Again, In my opinion this is it basically failing but I’m not a mechanic . I just filed a complaint through the BBB over this as well but does anyone here have advice? Or another resolution?

I personally believe shorting Squarespace is safer than investing in the bloated index funds right now. Because of the announced acquisition at $44 dollars per share, it won't realistically exceed that or trade at that level while the acquisition undergoes. The projected date for the acquisition is sometime in the fourth quarter. That leaves plenty of time for the price to slip farther from $44 dollars as institutions and longtime holders exit satisfied with their gains and unwilling to wait till the fourth quarter to make 1.5% that is the 65 cents from the peak of 43.35 (which I happened to enter my initial 1.3k short position of margin on). This is not a high risk, high reward trade. This is an easy one or two percent in two weeks on large amounts of money. I do manage more money than I have in my personal account, and for my personal account, 1.3k is significant and I will be putting in more. There will be NO retail investors seeking 1.5% over six months. There will be NO institutions that don't sell tomorrow or within a week after identifying new opportunities. No more money will be made long. It is all short. 1-2 or even 3% gains in a very small period of time, then I will roll over the money into something new before interest on my margin eats it up. I hope to put in another 5k soon but if my balance doesn't settle by tomorrow the perfect window of opportunity I seized today could pass. Good luck to everyone and goodnight.

Hello I’m a 29M and about 2 months ago I had a heavy rectal bleeding with somewhat of a loose stool. Gotta say it was a lot and I went to the bathroom 3 times on that specific day and each time had plenty of blood. Up to that point my diet was bad and I was pretty much eating junk food everyday. Anyhow, haven’t seen any blood at all ever since but I’ve noticed my stool has been loose for I don’t know how long lol. Even tho I changed my diet and started exercising. It’s still pretty much loose. Now here’s something. After about 10 days I bought the home kit fit test on Amazon and did it. Well, result is negative yayyyy but it was 2 tests so I did the other one after another week which was positive lol. After around 10 days I bought the test again and 1 negative and 1 positive again lol. Has that ever happened to anyone? Anyhow, I went to see my dr who thinks it might be hemorrhoids but because of the positive fit test she said I should get a colonoscopy and referred my to a GI and obviously I’ll be pushing for a colonoscopy. It’s in June tho so the waiting game is kinda long

When you are just sitting there waiting and not knowing about when it will come. When you have to wonder how much more time, or even if you would have to get on the phone with them or chat with some bot and try to get AI and then try to get a person after that. That is what this post is about.

Hello everyone,
If I summarize my situation,
My OPT process started in July 2023 and ends in July 2024.
When I started working, we filled out the I9 form and I started working. In the I9 form, the last working day is considered as the end time of the opt.
I know that e-verfy is required for opt stem extension and my company registered with e-verfy for me 2 months ago.
My primary plan is to continue working by applying for OPT stem extension.

My questions will be:

1. I will apply for opt stem extension. I am not registered with e-verfy yet, what should my company do? Does company need to do anything with e-verify? Do we need to fill out a new I9 after the OPT end date? Or should we continue like this? Or should my company show me in the e-verify system?
2. My other question is this. I am the only person working in the company, will this affect opt stem extension?
3. To apply stem opt, we need to fill I-983, what should be the starting day? I joined the company last year?
4. Another question I have is, after applying for stem extension, what should I do if I find another job before I qualify for the stem extension? What are your suggestions? Should I wait for the stem extension to get a new job?

First time ever using Kraken I got a problem where nobody from kraken is helping me
Their livechat doesnt respond anymore, i've always got almost instant help from the chat but now I dont get connected to any specialist even after waiting for hours. I tried emailing but no response.
Basically im wondering why my withdrawal is on hold and why i cant cancel it and try again
My public ID is: AA61 N84G SRWO GARY
Transaction is: FTAV5UG-ILf3jG1aCkFpIuMaxWmmFB

So, I cheated on my boyfriend, yes that was my mistake, feel free to judge me personally, but this post is not about that.
TLDR; I ruined the life of a guy I was cheating with and he wanted to ruin mine
Mid of January, I (23M) met this guy (let’s call him D, 35M) on Grindr. I told him straight away that I have a boyfriend (let’s call him F, 45M), so we thought it was just going to be a one-off thing. My boyfriend was visiting his family for a month at that time, a good 12 hours flight from where we are. I lied to him that my boyfriend is okay with me meeting someone else behind his back as long as it didn’t become anything serious. Actually, my boyfriend told me that I’m free to meet anyone else so long he didn’t know, but I’m sure he didn’t mean that as he told me this in a fight.
A was everything my boyfriend wasn’t. F and I were on a rough patch, and communication always became a dead end. He was intimate, and communicative. He desired me and didn’t make me feel lonely in the relationship. Moreover, D wanted to do some sexual things that F didn’t want to do with me. The closer we were, the more intimate we became. Drunk with rose-tinted glasses, I started saying pillow talks that we’ll get married and started naming our children. D paid for almost everything as I was between jobs.
A bit of backstory. D was not originally from this country (Ireland), neither do I nor F. D was here on a study visa, and his visa is about to expire. He met someone almost 2 years ago that broke his heart, and he was in a terrible mental state since, taking medications for anxiety and depression. Last year around December, he took a healing trip around Europe and met this other guy (let’s call him G, 50+M). They met in a beautiful country in the Mediterranean (although G is from another country), so D wanted to move to that country so he could be closer to G.
Anyway, because he was with me and he thought we'd be together, he refused this job (he didn’t get the offer but got an interview for it), and applied to a university (in a course he didn’t want) just so he can renew his visa. He also urged me to break up with F, but I wasn’t sure. F eventually returned, and I said I wanted to be separated from him for a while (in my mind, I didn’t know if D would be able to stay here), and left his place the next morning to D’s place. That day, I ended things with D, because my heart feels very burdened, and I felt like I made the wrong choice. I went back to F’s place.
D then continued to bomb my phone with messages, saying he couldn’t believe this was happening. Eventually, he begged me to meet him one last time for a breakfast to talk things through, and I agreed. I met him in a quite fancy restaurant (for me at least), with flowers, a card, etc. In the end, I melted and when he asked me if we can try this one more time, and he’s willing to be “the guy I’m cheating with”, I foolishly agreed. This was mid February.
From then, he has been trying his best to win my heart, taking me on dates, etc. My mind told me that I should just go with D because 1) he’s come out, and F hasn’t, 2) he loves PDA, while F can’t, and 3) D wants to marry me, while F is already married to a woman. F has been separated from his wife for a few years now, can’t divorce her for many reasons, one of which is because he had children with her. He lives full time with me, even though when his family visited he had to hide me and our things which hurt me in the past.
Anyway, even with all that, I just can’t shake off this wrong feeling. So by the end of March, after D being all jealous the whole month, I broke it off with him. The reason I just realized now: all those feelings that I love with D, I want it from F. And ever since he returned mid February, he’s been nothing but that, so I felt content.
Since we live in the same town, I met D every once in a while accidentally, like in a bus or in a hospital. I have told all these stories to my good friend (let’s call him K, 24M) from work, who had met D but not yet F at that point. I also didn’t come clean to F.
One day, about 3 weeks ago, K told me that he wanted me to go with him and his date to a gay club (he wasn’t feeling safe, and this is after their private lunch). I said yes, because I had nothing to do that day. He then told me that D is coming as well (I forgot if K invited him first or D invited himself before me when he asked K for a gay club recommendation). I had a bad feeling, but eventually said fuck it, what’s gonna happen?
D and I met there. It was awkward, but as the drinks started to take effect, and I started to become tipsy, he asked me if we wanted to “have fun for tonight and forget the next morning”. I agreed. We did have fun dancing (no sex) that night, and he came back to my place, not with the intention to have sex at all (at least from me). Me, still tipsy, was asked by him what happened between us, and one thing led to another… Still no sex, but he came to the conclusion that I manipulated him (love bombing). He asked me if this is true. With the evidence in front of me, I said yes, even though in hindsight, that was never my intention.
From the beginning, I wished that the relationship between me and him was just a hookup, or FWB at best. When romantic feelings started to develop, I genuinely thought that I wanted to be with D. Never once did I think I wanted to play with his feelings or life. But the actions that I did, that he described, is manipulation. So that’s why I said yes.
He got really angry, and threatened me with many things. I was having a panic attack, but he ended that night saying that he forgave me and that he won’t do anything that will harm me. Later on, he texted me that he thinks I have a mental illness (which I also think I have, but I’m still waiting for the diagnosis (my next appointment with a psychiatrist)).
I had forgotten about him, until last week when F left the apartment to buy some groceries in a suspicious manner. I was working from home that day, so I was too busy to worry. I did ask him after about half an hour, and he said he’s gonna come back soon, but I again became preoccupied with work and I didn’t realize he'd been gone for 1.5 hours. I then started to worry that maybe F met with D (something that D has threatened me with as he knows where we live and where F works), so I texted K. He told me to go check, because maybe it was not related and F is in an unrelated danger. But before I left the apartment, D said he’s going to return my stuff.
By then, I knew they met, and lo and behold when I was about to go downstairs I saw them coming upstairs together.
After letting D in, he unpacked his bag and showed F stuff related to us, pictures, gifts. He then unloaded his anger, saying that I ruined his life by manipulating him, that I’m selfish, and that I didn’t regret what had happened so I’m mentally ill. F at this point was trying to calm D down, fearing our safety (bless him). Then, after D left, F and I had the talk.
Basically, F knew from about a week before that. He just focused on trying to calm D, and asked D to not let me know that he’d known because “he didn’t want to see me ashamed in front of him (F)”. D, who’s really set on ruining my life back, didn’t care. But, it was fine for a couple of days, I apologized and put in effort to fix the relationship.
Until D suddenly rang me that he’s outside and he wanted to talk. That day, I just started working, and K was coming over to work together from home for a couple of days. He came in, and told me to pay back what I owe him (around 5kUSD) because he applied to the college because of me. I said yes, and he was about to leave. I went to K (who was in another room closer to the front door avoiding all these because I told him to), and without realizing I said “what the fuck” to him. I also thought it was not loud, but maybe because the situation made the apartment quiet, me and K think D heard. Either that, or he was just really angry, he already left the front door but he barged in again before F could close the door and punched me in the face.
He punched me again a few times on my arms, chest and side belly, until F tried to stop him. I didn’t punch him back, but I did almost kick him because he didn’t let me go. He pushed me back, and F almost fell and hit his head if not for K saving him. F then told me to move away for a bit. I called the police at this point, in case he went berserk. F was recording everything from the get go (voice, legal). Honestly, up until this point, I’m still on the fence about going through with this and going to the police. I also sent about 1kUSD to D while F was trying to calm him down.
The three of us then talk again. D told me that he was looking for me around the city today, and that I was lucky he didn’t see me because he “didn’t know what he’d be doing to me if he saw me, either to punch me and humiliate me in front of many people, or to throw me under the bus”. Now, I was (am) genuinely scared. He also told us that he has been having more severe mental issues, couldn’t eat or sleep, shaking, almost fainted at work. He had to take a higher dose of his medications for anxiety and depression. He left, I was having a quick chat with F that I called the police and he told me not to press charges in case this makes D goes ballistic, and queue the police come (just about 15 seconds after D left the apartment). I believe the police saw his back.
Eventually I didn’t press charges, the police took note of what was happening and a quick background story, and they told me to block him. I’ve blocked him and told my friends to not block him but hide their social media posts from him.
F is in a bad situation now. In the morning after and every morning after that, he was his normal self, caring and all, but after he comes home from work he’s been quiet and stressed. I believe this is partially him trying to process everything and him worrying that D will make another issue, specifically with him at work, and that he’ll be found out that he’s gay. F asked me to run away to a different city just to avoid D if anything were to happen again, but when I asked if he still wanted to try and make this work he said yes.
Honestly, I don’t know what to do.

It hasn't even been a month and they're already moving on. Was all that talk of love and hurting just fake? Was it all just a moment of guilt and now they can go on and be themselves once again. They say the memories are worth holding but why? You just make it sound like it was the worst thing and to move on that fast...actions speak louder than words. You told me that once and it shows. I understand when you say you were afraid I'd move on afterwards because of how closed off I was with talking about things. I feel like I did so much yet so little with how you describe everything. Were the long drives just for me, the short times we spent together weren't good enough? I know this sounds like a "What about me" sort of post but I'm just trying not to blame myself for everything. I didn't voice a lot of concerns I had during our relationship because I didn't want you to worry and instead it started to show more and more. Every time I’d tell myself to say something I'd fight it. I was afraid that you'd judge me for something like jealousy and in my mind I figured if I just suppress it everything would be fine. However, that jealousy doesn't just stay in that state. It turns to some hurtful mindsets such as "I'm not good enough" or "They're just waiting for the moment to end it". In many ways that is insecurity and I honestly just don't know how to love myself. I know now is the best time to do it and we both agreed that's what we want for each other. The whole moving on is just tearing me apart though. What if I did the same thing and instead of going to therapy and actually working on myself I just rebound off someone? That's not fair to that person or you. I'm sure many can agree that they've tried to fill that void and I certainly tried after my first relationship. It didn't help and instead I felt so guilty I put myself in a mental prison and isolated for 4 years. At this point I've just been rambling on about everything and I just want it all to stop. You never gave me straightforward answers even after all this so there's no point in confrontation. I hope you properly heal and I'm just going to keep trying to find that inner peace.