Stone pots and pans

So im with this family for 7 months. I agreed that i would cook for them almost every day and deep clean the house once a week (used to do it 2 times a week btw) + vacuum clean every day and im doing it The problem is that they ask for more and if i miss smth they start blaming me Like there were guests (i didn't know btw) and they expected me to clean after them (i didn't cause i was in my room and it was my free time) and i was told how awful it is that they had to clean everything by themselves (put the dishes in dishwasher after THEMSELVES) I told them im not supposed to clean after them in first place but i would if i saw (honestly i kinda did that but pans and pots were still full so i didn't clean them when i was in the kitchen). I do clean after the child all the time* so it has nothing to do with the kid Also honestly i always clean after the whole family especially in the kitchen they just don't notice and blame me when for some reasons i don't do it. It's not the 1st time im blamed for things and i almost argue with them (especially HD) and i am not an arguing type of a person at all. What do i say? How do i explain them? Whenever i say i do what i can or that i think i do enough (take care of the kid as much as required, clean the house and cook) i get a "serious talk" or an argue "How is that so WE had to do it not u????" (clean after their guests) Im just mad already at all the serious talks which are just more requirements Also they want me to understand them without any words, they always aay how i should "feel" what im supposed to do. Yes i did talk to them that i can't do it but they don't listen to me. So here goes the question again: what do i tell them? So that they finally understand

I am sitting in one of the disused but quite beautiful parts of the neighborhood, waiting for it to rain.
The rain has already come and gone, a light rain that left traces of dampness on the pavement – the shade of the spring day darkens, becomes real, which is a comfort because that realness, that feeling of extra substance, comes from the water cycle working the way it's supposed to.
I feel it around my nostrils, on the cheeks of my face near the eyes, like I'm a frog looking up from its pond water, which is a pleasant feeling to sashay around town with. This is the spring we all know, the moisture appearing on my skin after driving miles above the earth ten minutes earlier –
an epic plunge is what we are walking through, but it's already rising again, and let's face it – we live in a cook pot set on media, I mean medium – medium is the setting on the cook pot, which notice is more than a crock. From the frog’s point of view, it is ideal.
From our point of view, standing in the chop of the water cycle, we are soaring in the air – then minutes from now, we might be walking in the clouds, and who knows after that, but this is the context for comings and goings this mid-afternoon – this potential for levitation.
I find a broad and elegant tree stump to sit on and record the concrete. Someday we'll all have concrete recorders but today, we just have me.
The stumps are not indigenous to the property, at least I don't think so, but I'm not exactly sure why I don't think that, given that the facility that occupies the block was once probably a forest with abundant marshy places. The forest went, then some infrastructural evolution played out that upcycled into a world-class performing arts center.
Given that my art, before it is anything, is performative – watch the monkey paint words with a stick – I'm hand-in-glove with the performance of the plaza.
I am sitting in a grove of tree stumps, which automatically brings to mind entropy – we all will die someday, become handsome all-weather furniture that slowly disintegrates – but then the overwhelming pleasantness of the day causes the thought to move on, and the stumps become a moment in time that is also a cross-section of full biography, which is quite a thing to be sitting on, waiting for the rain.
The forecast, which I predict would be one of the more impressive modern achievements to the humans who lived through the ice age – just an opinion. The forecast –
I picture their faces in stunned wonder as weather prediction after weather prediction comes true. The forecast
says there is a one-hundred percent chance of rain later this afternoon, time precise to the quarter hour, but with Doppler weather radar, one can make one's own data-driven prediction about when the rain will start to the nearest few minutes.
Someday we'll wear watches that are nothing but countdown clocks ’til the next time the forecast calls for rain – when the clock reaches the nearest minute, it switches to seconds.
This broad, elegant stump I'm sitting on sets on a bed of gravel which, when it rains, can convince me it is river gravel – pick up a few of the rounded stones, give them a close look for evidence of the past. I briefly imagine
finding the remains of a sauropod, each piece of gravel containing a tiny piece of a single sauropod, which together add up to the most complete sauropod skeleton yet discovered.
The stump is all take and no give, and yet I think I prefer it to popping open a lawn chair – the imperviousness of the stump being conducive to recording the concrete.
My backside is about eighty-years wide, which is older than my age, which inspires thoughts about backing into predestination, at least where just sitting around on a fine spring day is concerned. Like a bump on a log in a way, and let's face it – the concrete doesn't get much more concrete than that. A splashing sound
comes from the page. I scan the paper like it’s the sky, and I'm waiting for an aerial firework to open, then I find the spot of rain splashed across the phrase think so – think so, is the phrase – which is followed by a second raindrop, this one hitting the word water, causing the ink to run a little.
A one-hundred percent chance – does that even make sense? I picture a barrel of rain, rolling across the plains. Perhaps we should feel lucky for being visited by such a probability – possibly years before it rolls around again.
Rain will undoubtedly fall at this time, we say to our ice-age guests, and they will hold up the one hand like it's rain, hold up the other like it's time, weigh the two sides side-by-side maybe, maybe invent that gesture where the dancer holds both palms above their heads, lifts them up and down like they're raising the roof.
Still, I'm not sure they'll really understand all those computer models, wrapping themselves around big-data projects involving sensors and rain gauges deployed across the land, starting centuries ago. Science raised the roof, we might say, at least as far as weather prediction is concerned.
I sense the rain not exactly letting up, retreat to the interior of the performing arts center after taking a few notes.
Along part of the gravel is a long puddle of water from the overnight rain, and I would need but a few fish bones or raccoon tracks to believe the whole thing was situated beside a river, the sort of gravel bed surging with snow melt earlier in the season.
This being the Midwest, higher elevations are usually metaphorical, metaphorical before they are anything else, and I think about the campus surging with graduates this past weekend, the landscape of human potential, in all directions, inundated by them.
Inside now, I see a balloon bouquet along one wall of the concourse, with gold Mylar affirmation – The Best Is Yet to Come! – floating on the end of a ribbon.
A one-hundred percent chance of rain – imagine telling all those graduates, you have a one-hundred percent chance of finding love within a fortnight. Call it a graduation gift, then imagine all those rain gauges quivering in their brackets at the thought of measurements certain to be made, collated, used to improve the algorithms that animate the global gods of rain.
At the far end of the concourse, a lady is teaching a gentleman how to dance – they aren’t touching, aren’t even facing each other – side-by-side – and I hear her call out the moves, move-by-move.
Maybe he’s an actor and she’s going over a certain bit of choreography for an upcoming production. Maybe he’s a restless spirit, and she’s teaching him the art of haunting.
That ghost forest in the gravel outside is adjacent to one of the busiest intersections on campus, and yet, turn your back to it, and it becomes just another element in the stopping and starting of the cosmos.
I could see to either end of the block from that broad, elegant tree stump I was sitting on without really being seen from the street which, along with a lush stand of grass in a nearby raised garden bed, brings to mind the wide-open prairie from centuries past.
I picture deer bounding over golden rod. I picture foxes negotiating cone flowers.
The interior of the performing arts center is designed around the premise of potential – four theaters in league with the cardinal directions, plus a blindingly white amphitheater and a low stage in the concourse itself, where they hand out complimentary spliffs and pass around community bongs during free upbeat life-affirming musical programs, attended by folks after the workday is over, plus a helping of retirees.
Okay, not grass but alcohol, but you get the point – people enjoy shindigs now and then. The lady and gentleman are out of sight, but she’s still giving direction – I can hear their back and forth somewhere around the curve in the wall,
which might stand for the passing of time. I imagine myself performing the pasodoble – no, I take it back. I imagine myself performing the pasodoble – no, I take it back! For real this time! I imagine myself destroying the pasodoble – no, god, my boot heels! The planks on the floor! I take it back!
The sun returns, so I pick up my things, head back out to that secluded space, spend a few minutes admiring the resoundingly designed program of the building.
Preformed white concrete panels are suspended twelve feet off the ground to establish the roof of the entrance. Ninety-degree angles abundantly in evidence. Brick pixelates the angled outer walls with the stuff of the earth. Ultra-high resolution, they call it around the masonic lodge.
Someone in the amphitheater is having their photo taken by a professional – everyone loves to do photo shoots there. She is wearing dark knee socks, a navy jumper and a blue bowl haircut, or maybe it’s a wig – I can’t tell from here. I picture anime or promotional material for this fine spring day.
A squirrel bounds through the grass – then poses in front of me, paws together, as though summoning oration.
A robin alights on the stone cladding of the raised beds, begins to stand exclusively on its left leg. The leg is angled under the center of mass – it’s a practiced move.
No one knows why the American robin does this – maybe it’s like bird meditation, though the memory of the American robin is so specifically extraordinary when it comes to navigation and geospecific locations that effectively, at the sensual level on up, it is living in a reality separate from our own, so who knows what meditation might mean.
They can see the magnetic fields of the earth in their eyes using a protein called cryptochrome, which reacts to magnetism. Cryptochrome – like something from the Marvel universe.
Maybe when the American robin stands on its left leg, it’s spacing out to the daytime reality of solar storms, the whole environment all aflutter with a phenomenology of waves passing around the material world.
The robin and the squirrel go their separate ways, and I feel the temperature drop – ah, me! the pasodoble! – as the next part of the front crosses campus.
A peel of thunder indicates the breaking of the sound barrier by means of electromagnetism and the displacement of gasses. Electromagnetic properties experience disequilibrium as a kind of earthquake in the sky that causes the air to vibrate in an awe-inspiring way – the sound magnetic fields make when they rearrange themselves in a gaseous atmosphere.
We are fluid dwellers, through and through, we humans and mammals and reptiles and amphibians and lichen gnawing on patches of the plaza’s concrete. Maybe from the standpoint of the atmosphere, land is just one big coral reef.
When that perfect destiny began to drop rain, the sound at first was curious, expectant – an all-squinty-eyed-and-kissy-faced sort of rain began to fall that grew into a snowy hum that seemed to have a simple song playing inside it, like someone playing a ukulele in the room next door, singing along.
The gig carries on for twenty minutes or so – an opening act – before the rain begins to march double time through the streets – barely soldiers even when they were soldiers.
Less tactic and more matador, this rain storm, and its boot heel crashes down on the planking of the still-lovely spring day. These magnetic storms are not
for war making, nor fighting bulls, nor even for entertaining that cosmic bird called the American robin. What are they for then?
American robins also configure their flight by the stars, by remembering features on the land, by creating mental maps of it all.
And they swim with both grace and endurance, as they navigate this liquid world, this concrete way of life.
In the moment, they are roosting in a tree, observing the silver magnetic waves marching through the streets. Made of what? The pasodoble! Concrete.

Just finished my third 100% play-through of Tears on the 1 year anniversary. It’s pretty brutal to 100% this game, but I enjoyed it. Here’s my 100% list:

• 1,000 Korok Seeds
• 100% map completion (includes all Named Locations, Cave Entrances, Shrines, Light Roots, Wells, Chasms, Towns, Settlements, Stables, Specialty Shops, Device Dispensers, Sky View Towers, Forge / Weapon Constructs and Refineries, Tears of the Dragon, Ancient Tablets, and Fairy Fountains)
• All chest icons on Shrines (appears when all chests in the shrines have been opened)
• 23 Main Quests
• 60 Side Adventures
• 31 Shrine Quests
• 139 Side Quests
• 18 Memories
• Completed Hyrule Compendium
• 228 Recipes
• Upgraded all Horses to the max
• All Clothing and Armor Pieces upgraded to the max
• 21 Energy Cells
• 27 Zonai Devices
• 51 Paraglider Fabric Skins
• 12 Schema Stones
• 34 Yiga Schematics
• 31 Old Maps
• 147 Bubbul Gems
• 11 Horse Gear (Towing Harness, Saddles, Bridles)
• Medals of Honor
• All’s Well Key Item
• Dispelling Darkness Medal
• Hestu’s Gift Key Item
• 81 Addison Signs Put Up

I compiled a list of things I found online that helped me farm material so hopefully it’ll help others. My apologies for no credit to those who contributed. I simply copied and pasted a lot of these - but some are my own contributions.
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Useful Links
Zelda Dungeon Interactive Map
Armor Upgrade List
Horse Upgrade List
100% Map Landmark Guide (Helped me find a few missed locations)
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Missed Locations (after collecting all Koroks, quests, shrines, caves, and wells)
Missed all 3 times
Kolomo Garrison Ruins
Missed Twice
Gatepost Town Ruins
Castle Town Watchtower
Lost Woods
Inogo Bridge
Dracozu Altar
East Passage
Water Reservoir
Kolomo Garrison Ruins
Missed Locations (2nd and 3rd run-though)
Desert Rift
Device Dispenser on Thunderhead Isles
Sargon Bridge
Drena Canyon Mine
Retsam Forest Cave (North Entrance)
Missed Locations (1st run-through)
Lutos Crossing
Lanayru Road - West Gate
Canyon of Awakening Mine
Abandoned Eldin Mine Forge Construct
Floret Sandbar
Faron Woods
West Passage
Dalite Grove
Grove of Time
Nabooru Canyon Mine
Walnot Canyon Mine
Madorna Canyon Mine
Hickaly Grove
Rozudo Canyon Mine
Daval Canyon Mine
Granajih Canyon Mine
Agaat Canyon Mine
Applean Grove
Rok Grove
Rhoam Canyon Mine
Ruto Canyon Mine
Akkala Bridges (all 3)
Stolock Bridge
Crystal Refinery in Lookout Landing
Faloraa Canyon Mine (last one)
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Final Koroks (2nd and 3rd time)

• Desert by Shrine (Climb Up)
• Hateno beach
• Wellspring Island underneath staircase by the waterfall, 3414 0618 1551
• Thims Bridge Korok
• Ceiling stump west of Ulria Grotto (4078 0821 0236)
• South of Flirly Plateau, dive into lily pads (3014 -2537 0129)

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Money Makers

• If you are going to 100% this game, don’t sell items you will need later unless you already have extra, especially gems. Crosscheck it with the Armor Upgrade link above.
• I regularly cycled through Moldugas and the Lynels in the Floating Coliseum every blood moon. Lynel Hooves and Molduga Guts are easy to collect and have extra to sell at a good price.
• Extra armor is great to sell and can be easily obtained with Amiibos (if you have them all - I have the cards). In my experience, armor didn’t have a high drop rate until after I finished 2/4 regional phenomena

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Rocket Shields
Oromuwak Shrine (east of Rito Village). I visit here regularly to stock up on Rocket Shields.
Zonaites and Crytalized Charges

• Save Zonaite for Autobuild only
• Save Large Zonaites for Armor Upgrades only
• Best Way to get Crystalized Charges is defeat all Flux Construct, Hinox, Stone Talus, Frox, and Gleeok in the depths. They will always give you 20 crystalized charges.
• After you beat each regional boss on the surface, 3 of them will respawn in the Depths and give you 100 crystalized charges each after the first kill.
• Floating Colieseum is an excellent place to stack up on strong weapons and get 100 crystalized Charges)
• Plenty of chests in the Depths that have 20 Crystalized Charges
• Every Frox location has a small cluster of Zonaite
• Large Zonaite Deposits are basically ripoffs, you get very little for the effort

Hudson Signs

• Hudson Signs can be dependent on time or weather or something
• My last 2 were Lodrum Headland and Gerudo Canyon Stable

Horses
4-4-5-3 Stat Horses Found Southeast of Bublinga Forest
Gems Info

• Sapphire and Opal are the hardest? In addition to the breaking Rare Ore Deposits, Frost Talus’ are a good source for Sapphire and Opal
• 4 Ruby’s at Simosiwak Shrine
• Dondons seemed like a waste of time for me.
• Turn your sensor on in Death Moutain to target Rare Ore Deposits and mark them on the map to visit every blood moon.
• Luminous stones: Sky Mine (northeast corner of Sky Map), West Necluda Sky Archipelago (north of Ukoojisi Shrine), South Hyrule Sky Archipelago (west of Jinodok Shrine), Maw of Death Mountain Lakes

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How to get Stars

• Fast travel to Gerudo Canyon Skyview Tower
• Rest until Night.
• Walk up the ramp and launch yourself into the air.
• After being launched, point the camera down and begin diving. A star will eventually fall for you to claim.
• Descent back to the ground at Gerudo Canyon Skyview Tower and rest until night again.
• Fast travel to Typhlo Ruins Skyview tower. Launch, look down, catch star. (Or Mayam Shrine above Thyphlo Ruins)
• As soon as you catch start, you can warp right back to Gerudo Canyon Skyview Tower. Rest until Night. Rinse and Repeat.

Notes: You can do this with any of the other Skyview Towers below, but you must rest until night in between each star. Gerudo Canyon Skyview Tower seems to be the most convenient because there is a cooking pot next to Pikango at the base of the tower.
Also works with (not confirmed on my end)

• Gerudo Canyon
• Gerudo Highlands
• Rabella Wetlands
• Mount Lanaryu
• Ulri Mountain
• Eldin Canyon
• Sahasra Slope

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Silent Princess and Blue Nightshade
(-2476, -0646, 0208)
Milk

• Dantz in Hateno Pasture (Trade 3 acorns for 1 milk)
• Hateno Village General Store

Acorns

• Sage Temple Ruins

Dragon Parts

• Dragon claws from each dragon for the Goddess Statues Side Quest
• Dragon parts respawn every 10 minutes so if you’re trying to farm any parts and want to be a little lazy, you can ride the dragon continuously and set a timer for 10 mins, collect part, then repeat. Be sure to save every now and then (One time I collected parts for 1.5 hours, stepped away from the game and died and lost everything). Also, with the exception of the Light Dragon, you will fall off the dragon unless you adjust yourself as they go in and out of the Depths.

Beetles

• Big tree at Rutile Lake has 3-4 of each Beetle Type (-2470, -0610, 0202)
• Bronas Forest for Beetles

Hinox

• Hinox guts come from Black Hinoxes (need 15)

Black Lizalfos

• Tall Circular Rock north of Gerudo Desert Gateway and west of Gerudo Canyon Stable (use sky tower)
• West of Tabahl Woods Cave (southwest of Zora’s Domain)
• Veiled Falls (west of Zora’s Domain)
• Northeast of Upland Zorana (northwest of Toto Lake)
• North of Luto’s Crossing (just west of Ruto Lake name on small island)
• South of Ralis Pond
• Southwest of ebon Mountin (closer to the water)
• North of Keya Pond (intersects with Hanu pond, southwest of Ebon mountain)
• West side of Riola Spring (southwest of Mount Floria)
• North of Mount Hylia (and south of River of the dead)
• Gohma like skeleton, east of Gerudo town, west of Palu Wasteland

Black Boss Bokoblin

• Mystathi’s Shelf (Gerudo Highlands)
• West end of Vatorsa Snowfield (Gerudo Highlands)
• NW of Eastern Abbey (Great Plateau)
• SE corner of Aquame Lake in a half skull encampment (Hyrule Field near Coliseum Ruins)
• Halfway between Lanayru Bay and the Spring of Wisdom/ Mt Lanayru Skyview Tower (Lanayru)
• Varies since the game seems to scale some of these for some but not others even though they have story completed and a lot of hours as well.
• West Passage of Hyrule castle. Coords -0450, 0909, 0012. The entrance is closer to the castle gates where you’ll find a minecart that takes you to the room they’re in (just north of name label Hyrule Caste Moat)
• Another Black Boss Bokoblin in the depths at (-2097, -1510, -0692) near a Flux Construct I, and is underneath Nephra Hill (west of Digdogg Suspension Bridge)
• Depths north of Dueling Canyons Mine at 1332, -1547, -0646 (fixed)

Red Boss Bokoblin

• Patrolling just south of Talonto Peak in the Hebra region, along the path you travel to find Tulin at the peak during Rito storyline. There are actually two boss bokoblins here, with one on a higher and slightly more eastern shelf and the other slightly lower and westward shelf just above an entrance to Hebra South Summit Cave; the first one is the non-scaling red one, and the second scales. Thought I’d mention it because I and another commenter found the scaling one first.)
  
• On the skull bridge west of Mount Gustaf (west of Lookout Landing), between the Hyrule Ridge and Hyrule Plains regions.
  
• Patrolling the Maritta Exchange Ruins north of Lindor’s Brow in the Hyrule Ridge region.
  
• Patrolling in the middle of Seresa Scablands in the Hyrule Ridge region.
  
• In the Royal Ancient Lab Ruins in North Hyrule Plain, just north of New Serenne Stable
  
• Southeast Lookout Landing and Mabe Village Ruins in Hyrule Field
  
• South of the East Deplian Badlands in the Eldin Mountains, on a landing to the northwest of the Isle of Rabac (east of Thyphlo Ruins)
  
• On Zauz Island in the Lanayru Wetlands, directly east of Wetland Stable
  
• South of Mount Daphnes in Hyrule Field, between the mountain and the Exchange Ruins
  

Blue Lizalfols

• Warp to Zakusu Shrine, in the Naydra Snowfield near Mount Lanayru. There are about 6 in this area going up around the mountain and around the edges of the snowfield.
• Warp to the Niuzimod Lightroot in the depths, in the Ancient Underground Fortress, this is underneath the Akkala Citadel Ruins on the surface. There are about 4-5 here as well
• Another location for one blue Lizalfos: 2991, - 0215, 0278. It's the blue water area between Zobodon Highlands and Ruto Mountain, just south southwest of Zora's Domain
• Found some in the Lanayru region here: ** 4023, - 1664, 0345 (Lanayru Range - A platform of about 3 blue Lizalfos)
• Madorna Mountain - Another platform with 2 blue (3808, - 1660, 0329)
• North of Nadrya Snowfield Chasm - 1 blue under a tent with an icy Lizalfos (3601, - 1128, 0263)

Captain Construct I locations

• (1) In-isa shrine on great sky island - captain I
• (1) Ijo-o Shrine West Hebra Sky Islands
• (1) Rasitakiwak Shrine, southeast of Tarrey Town. 4166 1323 0229
• (1) Yansamin Shrine, Zonaite Forge Island, in sky above Fort Hateno. Other bots wield weapons with a captain 1 horn and a captain 2 horn. (2350 - 1782 1475)
• (1) Simosiwak Shrine, Bravery Island, in sky above Korok Forest. (Also, three rubies and a ruby sword, for 420 rupees every blood moon) (0163 1972 0759)

Captain Construct II locations

• (1) Nouda Shrine, inside Kopeeki Drifts Cave, east of Rito Village. -2318 2201 0173
• (1) Zakusu Shrine, Naydra Snowfield, west side of Mount Lanayru. 3527 - 1482 0168
• (1) Sifumim Shrine, overlooking Lurelin Village. 2826 - 3271 0078
• At the east end of the Lake Siela supply river, east of Kakariko Bridge, south east of the Pilars of Levia. Basically the line formed by the Pilars of Levia point south east to a camp of Constructs, one of which is a Captain II. 2248, -1429, 0026.
• Where the old bowling game used to be south of snowfield stable, east of nouda shrine -1974, 2144,0253
• Kanalet ridge in akkala highlands, north east of shrine by south akkala stable (3244,2000,0160)
• East of proxim bridge, north of hills of baumer, north of popla foothills sky view tower
• Wellspring island, up and southwest of Igoshon Shrine 3340 0538 1353

Captain Construct III locations

• Two in Typhlo Ruins, north of Korok Forest + eventually (2) soldier construct IV + 1 Soldier Construct III
• Two in a sea fort between Clarnet Coast and Aris Beach, west of Lurelin Village. 2 Captain Construct III + 3 Soldiers Construct III + 1 Soldier Construct IV
• South of Tarry Town, north of Ulria Grotto

Horriblins
Desert Colosseum
Gibdo Wings
Gerudo Underground Cemetery
Sand pits
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Shopping
Restock Shops
To restock any shop in Tears of the Kingdom, here is what you will have to do.

1. Buy out the item in the shop until there are none left.
2. Take out wood and flint to make a fire.
3. Rest by the fire till the next day.
4. Manually save the game.
5. Load the game from the save you just made.

Hateno General Store
Hylian Rice x5 (need 38 + recipes)
Swift Carrot x10 (need 10 + horses + recipes)
Bird Egg x5 (need 12 + recipes)
Fresh Milk x3 (need 66 + recipes)
Goat Butter x5 (Need 84 + recipes)
Kakariko General Store
Aerocuda Eyeball x3 (need 42)
Aerocuda Wing x3 (need 48)
Kakariko General Store Trissa
Goat Butter x5 (need 84 + recipes)
Swift Carrot x12 (need 10 + horses + recipes)
Bird Egg x5 (need 12 + recipes)
Fortified Pumpkin x3
Lookout Landing General Store
Hylian Rice x3 (need 38 + recipes)
Fresh Milk x4 (need 66 + recipes)
East Akkala Stable
· 3 Sticky Frog (need 30)
· 3 Smotherwing Butterfly (need 15)
Lakeside Stable
· 2 Sticky Frog
· 3 Thunderwing Butterfly (need 9)
· 2 Hightail Lizard (need 21)
South Akkala Stable
· 2 Sticky Lizard (need 24)
· 3 Hightail Lizard (need 21)
· 2 Fireproof Lizard (need 15)
Woodland Stable
· 3 Cold Darner (need 15)
· 3 Fireproof Lizard (need 15)
Kara Kara Bazaar General Store
Green Lizalfos Tail x3 (need 18)
Riverside Stable
· 5 Hylian Rice (need 38)
· 3 Thunderwing Butterfly (need 9)
· 3 Electric Darner (need 15)
Tabantha Bridge Stable
· 4 Fire Fruit (need 9)
· 3 Summerwing Butterfly (need 15)
· 3 Winterwing Butterfly (need 15)
· 3 Thunderwing Butterfly (need 9)
New Serenne Stable
· 4 Warm Darner (need 15)
· 4 Sunset Firefly (need 15 + 10 + 10)
Kara Kara Bazaar
· 5 Summerwing Butterfly (need 15)
· 5 Cold Darner (need 15)
Snowfield Stable
· 3 Summerwing Butterfly (need 15)
· 3 Warm Darner (need 15)
Kara Kara Bazaar
Summerwing Butterfly x5 (need 15)
Cold Darner x5 (need 15)
Foothill Stable
· 3 Thunderwing Butterfly (need 9)
Wetland Stable
· 3 Smotherwing Butterfly (need 24)
Rito Village General Store
Goat Butter x5 (need 84 + recipes)
Cane Sugar x3 (need 24 + recipes)
Tabantha Wheat x3 (need 42 + recipes)
Sunshroom x4 (need 15)
Korok General Store
Tabantha Wheat x2 (need 42 + recipes)
Hylian Rice x3 (need 38 + recipes)
Cane Sugar x3 (need 24 + recipes)
Goron General Store
Cane Sugar x3 (need 24 + recipes)
Goron Spice x3 (need 12 + recipes)
Zora General Store
Hylian Rice x4 (need 38 + recipes)
Swift Violet x4 (need 90)

So I am not a chef, amateur at best in home cooking but I do enjoy quality food and enjoy cooking with quality equipment.
I purchase most of my cookware in commercial cooking and restaurant supplies stores. I find the quality for abuse and the consistency to be unmatched compared to the “boutique whisks”.
A friend was over asking why I don’t have a hexclad set and choose to cook with pans that you can’t find at your local bougie home kitchen stores. In all honesty I had no answer, other than I simply prefer it.
So the question is, is there really a difference in those Jamie Oliver or Ramsay advertised pots and pans compared to say, the Winco pans or whatever brands are used in high end restaurant kitchens, with regards to end result in a dish?
Thank you all in advance!

My GE Profile Double Gas Range which was only 1.5 years old began to burn everything. A pot holder melted onto a pan in the time it takes to remove the pan from the oven and set on top. A "gold" Williams-Sonoma pan began to melt, and all food either turned to ash or was close to it in under 30 minutes of cook time. Some items didn't last 10 minutes. It took 7 visits by 5 different technicians but the problem was finally solved. It wasn't the thermostats or the control panel, or heating elements, or the 5 other things they thought it could be. It was a malfunctioning relay switch that's in the back exterior of the oven. Since I was unable to find anyone having this issue I thought I'd post here just in case someone else's oven suddenly starts showing its set at 350 or 250 (warm setting) and actually be in excess of 600 degrees.

Hello-
I just got the email with the results of my daughters endoscopy/biopsy. She does have celiac disease. Obviously, we are willing to go GF with her to keep her safe healthy and happy. Is this completely necessary or are we doing too much?
Do I need to buy new pots and pans? Plates and utensils?
I plan on asking her GI doctor all of these questions, but her appointment to discuss results isn't for another 3 weeks

So I have a lovely cast iron Dutch oven from my grandma and it made the most perfect loaf. Unfortunately, my unreliable oven can’t be counted on to not heat too hot and it started to ruin its seasoning.
So a couple of questions for those that bake with cast iron: what are you seasoning with that has a high enough smoke point? I had been using canola oil/rapeseed, but its smoke point is only around 400 F. And do you keep your baking pan separate from your regular cooking pan?
I’ve tried using our pizza stone uncovered with ice cubes in a tray, but it just doesn’t develop an ear. 😕

This is my incomplete SVTFOE the movie script. Until my friend thomasmfd convince me to scrap it here’s my incomplete SVTFOE the movie script.
Star Vs. The Forces of Evil the forces of evil the movie The film with a song called Empire of the Sun Walking on a dream while the camera pans down on a mural with the credits rolling by and hits the floor showing a Blue man with a blue sword wearing a Space helmet and a orange Tee shirt with black spots all over his shirt. Who is protecting the Empress of the Sun Hestia look who has Red hair and Red eyes and wears a White Kimono with red spots. Just then a group of people wearing brown robes and white masks are led by a bald creepy dude with a Scar on his right eye. He approaches the throne and begins to speak.
The creepy dude My majesty My name is Bob and my group are a bunch of nomads who travel from World to world gathering intel and giving them to each kingdom and we heard rumors about Cataclysm prison weakening. And we would like to have your Sword Empress of the sun. So we can use it to defeat Cataclysm.
Bob walks up the steps before Cutie's sword hangs by his neck stopping him.
Bob What’s the meaning of this guard!?
Cutiesaurs: The name is Cutiesaurs or Cutie for short. Bob Okay Cutie. Why did you stop me!?
Cutiesaurs Because I don’t trust you. Besides, Shady people are always up to no good.
Bob It’s for your own protection so let me through. Besides it is rumored that The Sun Sword is the only sword left.
Cutiesaurs I don’t Care the Gods hid those swords for protection from thieves like you, including the Fable Mew sword. Besides, it appears you want to use the empress sword to find the other swords.
Bob Well you two figure out my plan already so I guess I have no option but to take it from force.
Just then Bob uses his magic spell to pull out his sword and he and his minions begin to attack. Cutie and Molly try to fight back but it is too much for them and get captured and Bob’s minions capture Hestia as Bob grabs the sword and glances at it.
Bob This Sword is a decoy. (Bob then shatters it with his magic) Minions drag Cutie to the Castle dungeon while carry Hestia to that special place)
Cutie struggles against the minions' control while they drag him to the dungeon. Cut to five years later and we see Cutie shirtless hung up in the dungeon walls shirtless wearing only his pants and a piece of cloth covering his head except his eyes. Then Bob and his cultist.
Bob Well Cutie it’s been five years and still you won’t tell us where the Real Empress sword is!
Cutiesaur
Like I said for the last five years I don’t know.
Bob Well Cutie. I don’t need you anymore. Not since I detected the Sword of Mew and we’ve set up a trap for the holder of the sword. So Now I will give you this radio to keep you comfortable. I’ve got a queen to catch.
Bob Leaves the dungeon and enters a room which is in some blackish glow surrounded with red hue. At the floor is a star shape enclosed by a circle on the floor. There Bob stands at the edge and raises his hands which then begin to be turning a metallic silver. He begins to wave his hands and a Star shape pattern begins to have a pinkish water swirling around it then when it clears out we see Star Butterfly at the center of the Star pattern.
Bob Hello Princess My name is Bob and you have something that we need. (Bob then materializes some mask’s then drops them on the ground where mud surrounds the mask’s then the mud raises the Mask which then forms into humanoid shape).
Star Butterfly I’m sorry but this Wand isn’t yours to keep.
Star Shoots a Rainbow energy beam at Bob but he blocks it with nothing but his bare Metallic hands.
Bob I’m impressed that the sword has a few tricks up his sleeves. But I’ve had a few tricks up my sleeves myself.
Bob then shoots a sliver beam at Star and pulls out a golden butterfly from her chest and places it into a jar.
Bob I’ve taken your powers. If you want them back, give me your wand. What do you say Star?
Star Butterfly I say Narwhal blast. A large Narwhal appears and slides down destroying many of Bob's minions and then pinning Bob to a wall. She then runs away from the room.
Bob After her she must not escape with that sword.
Star flees Bob’s goons and hides in the dungeon where she begins to hear the song Always look on the bright side of light she follows the sound to a cell where she see’s Cutie hanging from the wall.
Cutiesaurs Hi there little girl, what brings you to this dank little dungeon?
Star Butterfly I’m hiding from a man and his goons who want my wand.
Cutiesaurs Oh Bob yea he wants that wand since it’s the Sword of Mew.
Star Butterfly The Sword of Mew?
Cutiesaurs Let me get out of these chains and find my helmet and shirt and find a safe place before I can explain everything
Cutiesaurus tries to break his chains but with no success.
Star Butterfly Need help?
Cutiesaurs Yeah sure just blast those chain’s
Star uses her wand to blast the chain off of Cutie
Cutiesaurs Thank you… Um I haven’t gotten your name.
Star Butterfly It’s Star Star Butterfly.
Cutiesaurs Why thank you Star. I’m Cutiesaur’s but people call me Cutie for short and I’m the royal guard of the Empress or was before Bob and his golem army took me and put me in this dungeon. Now where is my shirt? Cutie searches everywhere for his shirt until Star shows him his shirt and grabs it and puts it back on.
Cutiesaurs Thanks Star. Now I need my Helmet.
Star Butterfly Why?
Cutiesaurs Because it protects people. Because I was born with a face that is so handsome that it melts people's faces. You wouldn’t want to see people's faces melting. It's nasty.
Star Butterfly Eww. But anyway I think I saw it over there at the bench.
Star points to a bench where we see Cutie Helmet. He then grabs it and puts it on.
Cutiesaus Thanks Star Now we need a plan.
Star Butterfly Um would that involve these guys.
Star points to a group of humanoid creatures wearing black cloaks with hoodies and pale white masks.
Cutiesaurs Looks like the plan is to fight. (He pulls out his blue sword) It’s a good thing this sword is bound to me and no one else.
Star Butterfly I would like to help but that Wizard Bob just stole all my powers.
Cutiesaurs Except for the Sword of Mew
Star Butterfly I keep hearing that my Wand is a sword. How is this possible?
Cutiesaurs You must focus, be one with the wand and think of a burning blade.
Star focuses on it and her wand turns into a burning blade with rainbow fire. She then uses it to defeat Bob's minions.
Star Butterfly Wow this is incredible I didn’t know my wand could do that! How did you know!?
Cutiesaurs It’s a long story but we need a hiding spot and I know one. Follow me.
Cutie drags Star to a long forgotten cellar.
Star Butterfly Wow you sure know your way around the castle.
Cutiesaurs I like to walk around the castle patrolling it in my spare time and also reading books. Which is why I know that wand is a sword that is a key to one of the locks. Of a prison
Star Butterfly What Locks?
Cutiesaurs Let me explain. Long ago before you before me before the kingdom of Mewni before time. Three gods and three goddesses appear. They created the rift then they created time then they created the universe then gave life to them. They taught each creature in the multiverse how to care and love and respect one another. However for order there must be chaos and chaos took the form of Cataclysm. He corrupted everything the gods and goddess did, undoing their work. So they fought back; the battle lasted a thousand year with the records of the events being lost though a few survived. After Cataclysm was weakened the Gods and Goddess locked him up in a prison out of space and out of time. With their own swords. They then gave the six swords to six universe’s. The Sword of Retro, The Sword of the sea, the Sword of sweets, The Sword of reality, The Sword of the sun, finally the Sword of Mewni. They form the kingdoms around the swords. But sadly over time the kingdoms lost knowledge of their past and swords. Except for two. The Kingdom of the Sun saved knowledge of the past and the kingdom of Mewni kept their sword safe. Which is why that wand you have is important; it's the last known sword that prevents the unleashing of Cataclysm.
Star Butterfly Wow I didn’t know my wand was a sword. But it still doesn’t explain how Bob managed to steal my butterfly forum. With some strange magic power.
Cutiesaurs It’s called forum splitting.
Star Butterfly What?
Cutiesaurs Forum splitting it’s a spelical spell that splits someone with transformations and turns their transformation as a spirit. We used it to cure someone from their Werewolf forum.
Star Butterfly Oh. Because my butterfly forum is important to me.
Cutiesaurs I’m sure it is Star.
Cutiesaurus begins to leave Star behind.
Star Butterfly Where are you going Cutie?
Cutiesaurs To find my Empress.
Star Butterfly Don’t you mean queen.
Cutiesaurs They both mean the same thing.
Star Butterfly Okay you’ll do that while I find some help.
Star pulls up her scissors but when she tries to use them they begin to crack and then turn to dust.
Cutiesaurs By the way, scissors are useless in the kingdom of the sun.
Star Butterfly (talking to herself) Great, I can’t get to Mewni or Earth now. Those scissors are my only escape. But maybe Cutie knows another way.
Star races to Cutie
Star Butterfly Hey Cutie I was thinking we can team up to take down Bob.
Cutiesaurs I prefer to work by myself. But thanks for the advice.
Star Butterfly (with her puppy dog eyes) Please!
Cutiesaurs (staring blankly) Your puppy dog eyes have no effect on me. Now would you excuse me? I got a queen to save.
A Cutie walks away Star Butterfly gets a idea
Star Butterfly You said Bob is looking for the six magical swords.
Cutiesaurs And What are you getting at?
Star Butterfly Well we can do what I forget.
Cutiesaurs A barter?
Star Butterfly Yea a barter.
Cutiesaurs By getting the four other swords by doing a trade for the empress then we use our might together to defeat Bob and kill two birds with one stone! I’m such a genius.
Star Butterfly Yes you are so how are you planning on getting to the realms?
Cutiesaurs I have a ship. In an old hanger.
Star Butterfly But how do we get there?
Cutiesaurs Well I know the secret paths around this old castle.
Cutie pulls an old touch handle but discovers it’s the wrong one and then pulls the right one. Which reveals a path which Cutie enters and Star follows behind. It leads to a rusty hanger with a giant shiny red space ship with jet engine thrusters and a jet pilot cockpit.
Cutiesaurs Behold the Gummi ship the most advanced ship in the kingdom, well the only one since all are now scrap. It took me 13 yea… (Notice Star biting the ship) Star what are you doing!?
Star Butterfly You said it’s a Gummi ship and I thought it was made out of gummi’s.
Cutiesaurs I called it the Gummi ship because it looks like it’s made out of gummi. Not made of Gummi.
Star Butterfly Oh. But how would this old thing get us where we are going?
Cutiesaurs Well it takes us to the rift.
Star Butterfly The Rift!? What’s that?
Cutiesaurs It’s like a highway. Star Butterfly What’s that?
Cutiesaurs (I might be too smart for her) It’s where a group of car’s go very fast like a road.
Star Butterfly Oh like a shortcut?
Cutiesaurs (sarcastly) Yes, much like a shortcut. (sarcasm ends) Anyway The rift used to be how one person got from one realm to the other. It was the world that was between realms. However with the invention of technologies and how certain realms like our Kingdom of the sun here isolated themselves. The Rift was no longer used and ships were turned to scrap. Well before I came along and fixed this baby up. Let’s go inside and take a tour and start this baby up.
Cutie and Star enter’s the Gummi ship
Cutiesaurs This ship has everything we need for our trip. It has bed’s and a guest bed for passengers. (in case it was an overnight trip.) A dining room, A kitchen for cooking food, A fireplace. A bookshelf with books throughout the realms is my favorite and finally the cockpit with an autopilot so the captain can do other things and it has a comfy seat with cup holders. It has everything to make you feel right at home. Any questions?
Star Butterfly Yea where is the kitchen sink?
Cutiesaurus then bang his head on the controls
Cutiesaurs I knew I forgot something. I guess I add this on stuff to add to the ship along with weapons. So let’s start this ship up.
Star Butterfly By pressing the big red button. (Star looks for the big red button) where’s the big red button?
Cutiesaurs Yea I did not add one since I don’t want people to be tempted by pushing a big red button. And besides, I don't want to discard myself when I start up the ship. And besides that’s not how you start the ship. (Pulls out the keys) This is how you start the ship
Cutie inserts the keys while the hangar doors open and the ship hovers for a bit before bursting into speed and opening a hole to the rift. But not before Bob and his minions race to the hanger seeing them fly away. The camera fades while Bob quietly makes a grin on his face. The screen then pans to the Gummi ship flying across the rift. Inside Star and Cutie figured out what to do next.
Star Butterfly So um Cutie do you know where the swords are?
Cutiesaurs Well legends say that one of the Swords will reveal the next sword. And since your sword is the only known one I think we’ll start there.
Cutie leads Star to the Bottom of the ship
Cutiesarus This is the map room. Well the only one that functions since this is the only ship that can travel across the rift. Since I have that ship I will navigate our course to where the next sword is.
Star Butterfly How are you gonna to do that? Since you have the knowledge and I have magic.
Cutiesaurs Correct Star but I have an idea. If you cast magic on your wand then it should act like a beacon. That only the swords will hear pinpointing its location. Thus selecting the location and flying to grab it. Any questions?
Star Butterfly Yes, one. I didn’t know Bacon could do that.
Cutiesaurs (Talking to himself) Sometimes I wonder if my kind is too advanced for people who look like they didn’t pass the middle ages.
Cutiesaurs No it’s not. After this read my books. Just use your magic
Star Butterfly I’m gonna create puppies that shoot laser beams.
Cutiesaurs I was thinking of dynamite with a laser beam but your idea sounds fair enough. (Though I must give someone a box of puppies when we land. Because one puppy is enough for me to handle for me right now.

Hello,
I've been mostly lurking here for a year and learning lots, so thanks for everyone who has shared and answered questions for noobs. I started my aquaponics adventure with a Aqua sprouts 10 gallon kit which for me has been a great place to start. Now I want to move to a bigger setup outside. Primary goal is to have fun, continue to learn new ways of gardening, all while keeping it look nice enough to not piss off my wife for taking over the patio. Not planning on harvesting fish.
Here is my plan, working from the bottom up.
I have a 100 gallon stock tank for the fish. Going with mostly (or all) comet gold fish because they can survive the cold winters and poop a lot, and i'm not eating them. I plan on using a substrate in the tank of soil covered with sand and rocks for fish to hide. Maybe one day I'll do aquatic plants if this project progresses well enough. I already have an air stone, which might be way to small, but will be ready to adjust if oxygen levels are too low.
I plan on using a 10(ish) gallon pot to hold a bog filter to remove solid waste.
For plants I am planning on 4" PVC pipes for NFT setup. I would like to also do a small media bed for cucumbers or larger plants but might add those later.
The plan is to use two pumps, one for the bog filter and one for the NFT water movement, both will empty into fish tank.
Questions:

1. Are there any really obvious mistakes I am making so far?
2. Is the bog filter the right choice for aquaponics system? I've mostly seen it in pond applications and not sure if it could get in the way of the nitrate/ nitrogen cycle.
3. Still haven't figured the fish to plant ratio but was going to start roughly with the "one pound of fish biomass for every three to five square feet of plant growing area."

Anyway, thanks for any tips y'all can provide.

The garage door shut with a groan behind us, closing us in the gloom of the single bulb hanging over the car.
Mother took a drag off her cigarette and sighed as she exhaled, the smoke filled the cabin of the Ford and stung my eyes.
“You really disappointed me today, Julianne," she tapped her cigarette in the ashtray below the dash, "you embarrassed me in front of the other mothers at the Ice Cream Social, shoveling down seconds and thirds like a pig. I thought I raised you better than that.”
She took another drag, daintily holding the cigarette between her perfectly manicured fingers.
“I'm going to have to tell your brother about this," she continued, “he'll have to come up with a punishment fit for a pig."
I felt my stomach drop. My kid brother, Thomas, was only six, but could be exceptionally cruel. Mother seemed to encourage him and was deferring to him more and more frequently for how the house was run, especially concerning my upbringing.
"Mother, please, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you. I'm sorry I was a pig and ate so much ice cream. I promise I won't do it again, I'll never eat any ice cream again," I was pleading with stone, unyielding.
“Hush your mouth. Go to your room and wait for Thomas," she put out the cigarette and got out of the car, I had no choice but to follow.
It felt like walking to the gallows as I stepped inside the house and headed towards the stairs to go to my room. Thomas had grown fond recently of physical punishment, he obviously delighted in Mother whipping me with a belt or, recently, Mother had allowed him to start beating me with a wooden spoon. He would squeal and giggle like a normal child watching bubbles in the wind while I screamed. I was dreading whatever was going to happen tonight, I chastised myself for eating that ice cream, I should have known she would show up. My sins were always laid bare.
Down the hall, I could hear Thomas watching television in the den. I only got to watch TV for half an hour on Saturday morning and new episodes of Happy Days with Mother and Thomas. Thomas got to watch all the TV he wanted. He could listen to the radio and turntable as much as he wanted, as loud as he wanted. Thomas had an entire room just for his toys.
I entered my bedroom, it was a space I occupied, but it didn't feel like mine. Mother kept it spartan, white walls and white bedspread. A crucifix over the bed and a painting of Jesus over the door. I had my desk and chair and a dresser with some of the porcelain dolls Daddy gave me before he died that Mother let me keep. That was it.
I placed my book bag down and sat on my bed, waiting for Thomas. It was a while, sitting there with nothing but my own thoughts and staring at the open door. I felt humiliated, I was almost thirteen and my entire life was dictated by my brother. Mother kept the house in constant lockdown to keep Thomas a secret. No outsiders were allowed in. I couldn't have friends because she was afraid I would mention him or sneak a friend in to gawk at my brother and tease him for being different.
I would never make fun of him, I was terrified of him. Terrified of what he was and what he was becoming.
Eventually I heard his heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and I felt my heart start beating faster and my palms began to sweat. I kneaded my skirt in my hands, trying to calm myself and dry my palms. His slow arrhythmic footsteps came down the hall and I watched him as he entered the room.
I couldn't help but internally recoil at his appearance, even though I'd known him since he was born, I could never adjust to how unnatural he appeared. Thomas had been born at home and had never seen a doctor, but he was obviously unwell.
He was six years old and was barely over two feet tall, but very squat and wide. His skin was thick and gray, the whites of his beady eyes were yellow and his hair was wispy and white like an old man's, spreading out like a halo around his gargoyle face. A slight odor of decomposition hung about him, it reminded me faintly of garbage cans on a hot summer day. I hated when Mother made me help him with a bath, his skin felt like old brittle leather that flaked onto my clothes in gray flecks. His body was dense like concrete, I could barely lift him into the tub. Picking him up forced his hair into my face where that smell of rot would fill my nose, causing me to gag, silently, so as not to offend him and draw any ire from him or Mother.
Today, Thomas was wearing bib overalls with a red and green striped sweater underneath, reminding me of a grotesque doll.
“Mama says you acted like a piggy today at the ice cream social,” he spoke up to me in his unsettlingly high pitched, yet raspy voice, like a child that smoked as much as Mother, "you need to come down for dinner right now for your punishment for embarrassing Mama."
He turned and walked back down the stairs and I had no choice but to follow his toddling form downstairs to the dining table. We entered the kitchen and the table was placed with two settings. Mother was already seated and Thomas clambered up into his booster seat at his normal spot next to Mother. She took a drag off her cigarette and motioned vaguely to the floor without even looking at me.
Neatly situated on the linoleum was my dinner, not on a plate, but directly on the floor. A pork chop, scoop of mashed potatoes, and a small pile of peas. No utensils, either.
Thomas giggled with glee upon seeing my face.
“You have Mama's permission now to eat like a piggy, now. No hands! Piggies just use their face!” He stood up in his chair and reached out for Mother’s ash tray and flung it out over my meal, peppering my dinner with cigarette ash and butts.
"Oops! Piggies don't mind trash though, do they, Mama?” he giggled and the sound filled me with rage.
"No, they don't,” Mother replied coolly while maneuvering her ashtray back in place and carefully putting out her cigarette before saying prayer.
As angry as I was, I got down on my hands and knees and did my best at eating what I could without using my hands. I knew if I refused, it would be far worse. The whole meal, Thomas made pig noises and would reach down and poke me with his fork, making comments about what a fat piggy I was and how he wished he could roast and eat me. I doubted Mother would even object if he actually did kill me and eat me.
Gagging my way through another bite of ashy pork chop, I felt a warm splat over my head and heard Thomas giggling. I reached up and felt he had dumped mashed potatoes into my hair.
Choking down tears, I asked Mother if I could clean the floor and bathe. She rolled her eyes and excused me to clear the table for them as well while she changed Thomas into his pajamas. Picking him up, she walked out of the room and Thomas stuck his putrid little purple tongue out at me before they made it out the kitchen door.
I silently cried while I cleared the table and washed the dinner dishes. Tears splashed down as I mopped up the mess from my food on the floor. I hated how awful Thomas was. I hated how they treated me. Ever since Daddy died and Thomas showed up, I was their punching bag. I missed Daddy so much.
Mother was kinder then, too. She was still severe, but Dad kept her tempered. After he died, there was a change that came over her. I was only six, so I didn't remember her too much from before, but I did remember her gushing on and on when she was pregnant with Thomas. How the baby was a gift from Our Heavenly Father, that it was going to complete our broken family.
My sixth birthday happened right after Daddy died and I remember sitting on the patio crying while the house was full of people after the funeral, normally he would have gotten me a new doll and a chocolate bar, instead I was forgotten. No doll. No chocolate. Just funeral potatoes and a house full of cigarette smoke from the adults.
Nobody remembered. The closest thing I got was my dad's sister, Aunt Judy, sitting next to me on the patio step for a few minutes of comfortable silence before giving my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. I don't think she knew her brother was memorialized on my birthday. Next year, Thomas was born the day before my birthday, so it was completely eclipsed as Mother had just birthed her new love into the world…
I stopped mid mop as a lightbulb finally went off. I had never put much thought into the dates before.
Thomas was born a full year after Daddy died. He couldn't be his dad. Who was Thomas’ actual father?
Washing mashed potatoes out of my hair that evening, I ran over and over the timeline. No matter how I parsed it out, Thomas was only my half brother. Going to bed that night, I kept myself awake, going over and over again to make sure. I couldn't remember any men being around at that time, but that didn't mean much. Adults can easily hide things from children. Tension began throbbing through my head and I felt queasy. Mother had always known all of my secrets, able to sniff them out like a bloodhound out or using Thomas to spy. Now I had one of Mother's secrets and I didn't know what to do with it.
First I wanted to confirm it, but it would mean snooping, which was difficult in a house that was rarely left empty. I would have to try finding Mother's calendar book or journal to see if she mentioned any dates or men.
But when could I attempt such a daring maneuver? Thomas hardly left the house. As proud as Mother was of him, she was very cognizant and protective of his differences and didn't want to draw attention to herself or Thomas like that. Mother herself had few social engagements throughout the week and mostly stayed home to watch her golden child.
I finally decided I would take the risk and fake sick on Tuesday, grocery day, so I could stay home from school while she went shopping. All Thomas did all day was watch TV downstairs, so that should give me about an hour to look through her room for clues. I decided to tuck my head down, try to behave as best as I could to avoid their wrath, and wait for Tuesday.
That weekend limped along agonizingly slow. Thomas was in a fine mood and was constantly seeking out a reason to poke me, punch me, slap me… he'd laugh while calling me a piggy with his off-putting wide mouth. I tried to mostly stay in my room and it seemed like neither of them cared.
School on Monday was a relief, but my anxiety ramped up. The consequences would be dire if Mother caught on that I was faking sick to stay home. I didn't even want to imagine how off the leash she'd let my half-brother become in his punishment for that level of insubordination.
I stayed up all night, my stomach was in knots, but I was committed to my plan. Throughout the night, I screamed as hard as I could into my pillow. Screamed until my throat was raw and I could barely talk. It felt cathartic in a way. When it was close to school time, I put on my heaviest flannel pajamas and began doing jumping jacks until my face was flushed and my scalp was soaked with sweat.
Looking in the bathroom mirror before heading down to talk to Mother, I thought I looked pretty convincing, my skin was flushed and sweaty, my eyes had circles under them from lack of sleep, and my voice croaked like a frog.
Heading downstairs, Mother was already feeding Thomas breakfast. I hesitantly stepped into the kitchen and stood there awkwardly for a second, pawing with my pajamas to keep my nerves steady until she noticed my presence and looked up.
“Why aren't you dressed, Julianne?"
"I don't feel well. My throat hurts and my tummy hurts.” My voice graveled out more than I was expecting, I really had hurt my throat.
She strode over to me and placed a cool hand on my sweaty brow.
"You do feel warm. Take an aspirin from the medicine cabinet and go lay back down. I'll check on you later," with that she turned back and walked over to Thomas, who was frozen in place, glaring at me over a forkful of scrambled eggs. The sharp glint of malice in his beady eyes made me shiver before I shuffled out of the kitchen.
I laid in bed, trying my best to look miserable until I eventually heard the faint sound of the television playing in the den as Thomas settled in for his normal daytime routine and the garage door opened as Mother headed to the grocery store. I bounded out of bed and watched the car back out of our driveway and head up the street.
My heart began to pound as I tiptoed down the hall to Mother's bedroom, a place I rarely even caught a glimpse of, let alone entered. I very slowly opened the door, taking great care to not make any noise to alert Thomas downstairs that I was out of bed.
Creeping into the butter yellow room, I could feel my heartbeat pounding in my skull, this was the naughtiest thing I had ever done by far. I stepped onto the rug to help disguise my footsteps and slowly made my way past the brass bed and towards her desk. My hands shook as I opened the top drawer, I pawed through rapidly and found nothing. I checked the next drawer down and again found nothing of interest, just stationary and envelopes.
Finally, the bottom drawer was what I was looking for, a stack of journals from the past decade. I flipped through, trying to find entries relevant to when Daddy died and who Mother slept with afterwards.
I've never fully recovered from what I read.
July 6, 1968
Edgar died today. Car accident. I cannot believe this is real. My light, my life, my anchor... Dr. Benson gave me a sedative at the hospital and I feel so tired. So very, very tired. Why has my Lord forsaken me so?
July 9, 1968
I feel like I am in a very bad dream, I feel numb and disconnected. All the consolation and pity from everyone makes me feel sick. After the memorial, it took everything in me to not break dishes and to scream at everyone to get out of my house. Julianne was moping about crying and I wanted to throw her out, too.
If I hadn't seen my dear Edgar's body in the hospital and held his urn in my own hands, I wouldn't believe he was really gone. I still don't entirely believe it.
I have prayed to God every night asking him to show me why he took my husband from me and I have gotten no answer.
I skimmed over the next few months, as it was more or less similar sentiments repeated night after night. I finally got to an entry that caught my eye.
September 17, 1968
My battle with my faith has been fraught the past few months, but Hallelujah! I feel I can see the Lord again in all his glory and might, for he has given me a way to reconnect to my Edgar!
I was thinking about the night Julianne was born, right in this very home, it was a difficult birth and she struggled to breathe at first. Ingrid, my midwife, made a comment to me that if the baby had failed to wake up on her own, that Ingrid had ways to make sure she would have made it.
I remember asking if it was a medical methodology and she made it clear to me that in certain circumstances, it was a mystical property she used to bring the air of life into a struggling baby's lungs. She gently alluded to being a practicing member of the dark arts. At the time, I felt quite scandalized to have someone like that in my God fearing home. Now I see her as the answer to my prayers! My angel!
On a whim, I called her and asked if she still practiced such techniques. She hesitantly confirmed that she did. I asked, if she could turn breath into the lungs of a child without, could she turn breath into a child that did not exist? Could she magick into existence another child of my beloved Edgar? She told me she had to do some research and she'd be back in touch.
Ingrid just called back after a few hours and said there was a spell she found, but it was dangerous and might have unpleasant results. I said, yes, of course! I trust my Lord and I believe he sent this woman of blessed magick to me for this purpose.
She says we will have to do it soon, in a few days during the new moon. She has a potion to brew, but it is happening! Praise God!
September 23, 1968
The ceremony was last night, and Ingrid believes it was a success, but we will have to wait. It did not take long, only an hour or two. Ingrid lit my bedroom with many beeswax candles and she had me drink a thick and bitter tea that caused me to become quite relaxed and foggy.
From my inner thigh, she cut me and collected my blood in a chalice, with which she mixed quite a lot of Edgar's ashes and other ingredients which I could not glean from my supine position and groggy wits. Ingrid began to chant, calling upon a higher power, as I pleaded with my Lord to let this work. To give me any piece of my Edgar back. She came to the bed and worked the paste between my legs into my womanly chamber, which was very uncomfortable, but manageable with the numbing effects of the tea.
She continued to sit with me and chant, her hand placed over my womb, until she decided at which time it was complete. She left and I fell into a deep sleep. When I woke up this morning, I felt quite uncomfortable, my body ached and when I used the restroom, a yellow fluid like pus poured out of me, but no sign of any ashes or blood, which gives me hope it was absorbed into my womb.
November 3, 1968
Praise be to our Lord, Ingrid just confirmed for me that I am with child, I had been hoping so, I had not gotten my cycle in October, but I wasn't sure if that was because of the discharge like pus that was still coming. She told me that was common with this spell and a side effect that would stop after the baby came.
I feel like I am floating on air, for the first time since Edgar left, I feel-
I suddenly became very aware of the feeling of eyes on the back of my head. I had become too engrossed in what was written before me and I had lost track of my surroundings. Very slowly, I turned around and my heart began pounding again as I saw Thomas standing in the doorway holding his wooden spoon in one hand. How had I not heard him?
He pointed at me with his empty hand and screamed, just a pure guttural screech from somewhere deep inside his disgusting little body. He charged at me from across the room, his horrible feet thumping solidly along the rug. He began beating my legs ruthlessly with the spoon, causing my legs to buckle. I crashed down to my knees in front of him, and he began lashing at my face, pulling my hair with one hand while wailing away at my head with the spoon.
I had dropped the journal I was holding and was desperately trying to get a hand on the spoon or push him away. All I could hear was him screaming. My arms flailed and I reached around on Mother's desk and grabbed onto the first thing I found and sank it into Thomas’ neck.
The end of Mother's gold letter opener protruded under his jaw. He went silent and he looked at me with utter shock. He dropped the spoon and collapsed on the ground, clutching at his neck as his thick black blood oozed out from his wound, letting out a stupendous odor of rot that filled the room. He didn't really say anything or make any noise. He just twitched for a moment and I saw his eyes glaze over.
In shock, I stood over his little body for a moment and I watched as he seemed to mummify in just a few minutes, like an ash person from Pompeii dressed in jeans and a flannel shirt. Even his blood that looked like shiny oil a second ago became like potting soil on Mother's rug. Reaching out to touch his hand, it crumbled away like sand.
Panic ran through me like a rabbit caught in a snare. Not knowing what to do, I ran. I ran down the hall, changed my clothes, put an extra change of clothes in my backpack and the last doll Daddy had ever given me and I ran. Mother would absolutely never forgive me and I was genuinely afraid she would kill me in retaliation for taking her beloved Thomas away from her. Her precious gift from God. My feet flew over the pavement and took me away from that house.
I called my Aunt Judy from a payphone outside the five & dime, and told her Mother had kicked me out and asked if I could stay with her. She had always had a strained relationship with my mother and it didn't take much convincing that she had kicked out her “only” child. Only Mother, Ingrid, and I ever knew about Thomas.
She gave me a home and took care of me. She never beat me or humiliated me. Even with her love, I was far from okay. For years I would close my eyes and hear Thomas scream, then the sudden silence. I'd see him fumbling at his neck and turning to ash. But I would also remember all the ways he would hurt me and how bad he was becoming. I could never talk to anyone about it, especially not the silent relief I felt I refused to admit to myself. Over time, however, Thomas' screams became a whisper and his silence faded into dust in my mind.
I moved on with my life. I went to college and became a photojournalist, getting to travel the world and watch history unfold. By choice, I never married, but was quite blessed with many beautiful friendships for companionship over the decades. I found balance in my life and a sense of happiness, if not peace. I never could quite stomach mashed potatoes again, though, they always taste ashy to me.
Mother never made any attempts to reach out to me or find me, at least that I'm aware of. Ten years ago, I was contacted by a hospital and they said my mother had been admitted earlier after falling and was about to pass, so she must have kept some tabs on me to know my phone number for her emergency contacts. Apparently she had collapsed in the driveway and a neighbor called an ambulance. I got there and her only words to me were, “take care of him," as she placed a locket in my hand. I opened the locket, Jesus was on one side, Thomas on the other. I didn't say anything to her, just held her frail old hand with nicotine stained nails until she passed in the night. My mother was gone and I felt nothing except a vague sense of relief.
When I got to her house, it was like a time capsule. Other than a newer television, it was just like it was when I'd fled so many years ago. The smell of tobacco smoke hung like incense in the air. It felt oppressive, like a tomb.
I wandered the house in a bit of a daze. The one place I didn't want to go was upstairs. I didn't want to see my old room, or Thomas' room, or Mother's. Putting it off, I went to fix myself some supper, realizing I hadn't eaten in almost a day. I took a pause when I opened the fridge and saw a baby bottle on a shelf. Silently praying she had been babysitting for a neighbor, I fixed myself some toast with sardines and sat eating in the den watching TV. It had been almost forty years and it still felt rebellious not eating at the table and watching TV without permission.
My eyes grew heavy and I finally mustered up the gumption to head upstairs to go to bed. The stairs creaked in a familiar way under my feet and I was taken back to the feeling of dread hearing either Mother or Thomas climbing up. My old room was at the top of the stairs, I saw the door was nailed shut and had rambling quotes about Judas copied from the Bible in my mother's handwriting taped to the door. I sighed gently and turned from the door to head down the hallway, deciding Mother's room was probably the best place to sleep.
I passed by Thomas’ toy room and I heard a murmur from the room. I stopped, curiosity got the best of me and I entered. In Thomas' old toy room was a crib with joyful clown sheets. Dread swelled up inside me as I heard more murmurs and saw the sheets move. Approaching slowly, I peaked under the sheet and gasped.
Tucked inside was what looked like a baby gargoyle, gray and papery looking. Pus leaked out of its milky, bulbous eyes. I pulled back the blanket and saw it had no legs and its arms bent back, like wings on a bird. It was wearing just a cloth diaper, overflowing with tarry looking stool that took my breath away with its pungency, it smelled like Thomas’ blood, but somehow worse. My heart broke for this poor creature, Lord only knows how many years it has been in this crib suffering from its unholy existence.
So this is who Mother had wanted me to take care of…
Not knowing what else to do, I gently scooped him up. Like Thomas, he was shockingly heavy for how small his body was. Placing him on the changing table, I cleaned him and rewrapped his bottom in a clean diaper cloth. It was difficult, he fussed tremendously, crying and flopping around as much as his flipper-like arms would allow. I tried wiping off his oozing eyes and he snapped his mouth, which I saw was full of disturbingly square yellow teeth, trying to bite me. I carried him to the kitchen and rocked him while I heated up his bottle and he became furious with me, almost barking like a dog when my hand would get near his face.
He settled a bit as he fed, but he would still sometimes suddenly spit out the bottle and attempt to bite me. I laid him back in his crib, this abomination in a clown sheet, and I walked down the hall to Mother's room letting out a long sigh.
Combing through my mother's journals in the early hours of the morning, it looked like she tried the ceremony again shortly after Thomas died, but she either lacked Ingrid’s help or didn't have enough of my father's ashes left. Something went terribly wrong. She was vaguer than she had been about Thomas’ conception, but I suspect she had used some of Thomas' remains. The resulting birth she named Isaac.
Mother's journals told a sad tale of her and Isaac's suffering. She never mentioned me, but lamented the loss of Thomas and Dad relentlessly. She was hyper protective of Isaac, as that was all she had left. If her world had been small before, it became microscopic after he entered her life, requiring nearly constant care. According to Mother, he was blind and colicky, sometimes going years at a time without sleeping through the night. She had breast fed him for years, but she had to stop after he grew teeth and began biting her intentionally and feeding on her blood.
I spent a lot of time over the next few days pondering what to do. I had to get her estate in order, she had left me the house, in an obvious attempt to get me to continue caretaking for Isaac, but I didn't want it. I had my own cozy home an hour away from here, filled with happy memories and my possessions acquired traveling the world. Mother's home had a heavy energy I couldn't shake. Her and Thomas were both gone, but the memories of the scoldings and beatings hung in every corner, like cobwebs that would never sweep away.
So, I fed Isaac and kept him clean and tried to keep him company, although he seemed to hate me passionately. I took care of him, all the while thinking about what I was going to do. After a week, I felt resolute in what had to be done.
Gathering up all of Mother's journals in a tote, I made my way to Isaac and picked him up and carried everything to the living room.
The ancient logs in the fireplace meant for display ignited instantly. One by one, I fed the journals into the fire, burning away years of my mother's consuming sorrow. Isaac fussed and moaned next to me the entire time. When the last pages shimmered away into lacy ash, I took a throw pillow off the couch and gently cradled Isaac in my other arm. It didn't take long before he stopped struggling and I felt his little body relax after decades of suffering.
I gently wrapped up a bundle in a clown sheet and placed it in the fire. It burned furiously, like the paper in my mother's journals, and was soon gone. Nothing but ashes and embers.
“Don't worry, Mother,” I said purely for my own sake, "I took care of Isaac for you."
And finally, I felt at peace.

Last week I commented on a post here about water tables, a few people (u/dreamcatcher32, u/lucidrose, u/BeneficialGrade8930)* were interested in the "science/experiment" table my husband built for our 4.5 yo- here it is in it's simple beauty 😂 literally posts leftover from a garden project and hardwood pickets leftover from fencing in our backyard. We have potted plants around a tree right behind it out of view that has an irritation line we ran from our garden, just added a split and line to her table so we can turn the line off to the plants while she uses it 1+ hours. She has run off somewhere with her tote of most of the beakers/flasks/pipettes/shovels/spoons, inside we keep a storage box with acceptable science experiment items (bath color tablets for colored water, baking soda/vinegar, some other things her and husband use while I'm taking a break inside). Husband has run off with her oil pan that she uses for the plaster "dig out gems" or whatever lol. It's going to get upgraded either this summer or fall as she's out grown it, husband's figuring out how he wants to do it (I'm voting for storage space not on the table, we'll see if it happens)

“On the third day there was a wedding at Cana in Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. Jesus also was invited to the wedding with his disciples. When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to him, “They have no wine.” And Jesus said to her, “Woman, what does this have to do with me? My hour has not yet come.” His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.” Now there were six stone water jars there for the Jewish rites of purification, each holding twenty or thirty gallons. Jesus said to the servants, “Fill the jars with water.” And they filled them up to the brim. And he said to them, “Now draw some out and take it to the master of the feast.” So they took it. When the master of the feast tasted the water now become wine, and did not know where it came from (though the servants who had drawn the water knew), the master of the feast called the bridegroom and said to him, “Everyone serves the good wine first, and when people have drunk freely, then the poor wine. But you have kept the good wine until now.” This, the first of his signs, Jesus did at Cana in Galilee, and manifested his glory. And his disciples believed in him.” ‭‭ John‬ ‭2‬:‭1‬-‭11‬ ‭ESV‬‬ https://bible.com/bible/59/jhn.2.1-11.ESV

The miracle indeed of our Lord Jesus Christ, whereby He made the water into wine, is not marvellous to those who know that it was God's doing. For He who made wine on that day at the marriage feast, in those six water-pots, which He commanded to be filled with water, the self-same does this every year in vines. For even as that which the servants put into the water-pots was turned into wine by the doing of the Lord, so in like manner also is what the clouds pour forth changed into wine by the doing of the same Lord.
But we do not wonder at the latter, because it happens every year: it has lost its marvellousness by its constant recurrence. And yet it suggests a greater consideration than that which was done in the water-pots. For who is there that considers the works of God, whereby this whole world is governed and regulated, who is not amazed and overwhelmed with miracles? If he considers the vigorous power of a single grain of any seed whatever, it is a mighty thing, it inspires him with awe.
But since men, intent on a different matter, have lost the consideration of the works of God, by which they should daily praise Him as the Creator, God has, as it were, reserved to Himself the doing of certain extraordinary actions, that, by striking them with wonder, He might rouse men as from sleep to worship Him. A dead man has risen again; men marvel: so many are born daily, and none marvels. If we reflect more considerately, it is a matter of greater wonder for one to be who was not before, than for one who was to come to life again.
Yet the same God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, does by His word all these things; and it is He who created that governs also. The former miracles He did by His Word, God with Himself; the latter miracles He did by the same Word incarnate, and for us made man. As we wonder at the things which were done by the man Jesus, so let us wonder at the things which where done by Jesus God. By Jesus God were made heaven, and earth, and the sea, all the garniture of heaven, the abounding riches of the earth, and the fruitfulness of the sea—all these things which lie within the reach of our eyes were made by Jesus God.
And we look at these things, and if His own spirit is in us they in such manner please us, that we praise Him that contrived them…

Hi all, I'm new here (I did read the sticky!)
Last summer my roommate and I sublet our apartment as we were both going to be travelling for a few months. When we returned, the apartment had cockroaches. We immediately called our apartment's pest control (who came a month later), we put glue traps everywhere, and used some insect-killer chalk all over the kitchen. Pest control eventually came, and have been coming every 2 weeks for the last 6-7 months or so to put some sort of poison in the hinges of all the kitchen cabinets.
I moved out in December for my internship, but left all my furniture with my roommate temporarily as I didn't need it for the time being. Now I've just purchased my first house and it's time for me to go back to that apartment and move all my stuff out. My (former) roommate has been incredibly diligent in having glue traps set up, using insect chalk, putting all garbage/compost/etc in sealed bins, and even keeps all pots/pans/cutlery in sealed bins as well. However, because it's an apartment and the problem is building-wide, she says she's still seeing 2-3 roaches per day in the kitchen. I don't believe roaches have been spotted outside of the kitchen - usually they are just on the cabinets, under the fridge, in the sink, etc.
My question: among the furniture I am bringing, I will be bringing an upholstered couch and faux suede recliner with me. All my other furniture (bookshelves, dressers, etc) can be wiped down and easily examined for roaches, but I'm not sure what to do with these two items. I'm fairly broke after just purchasing this house and would rather not have to throw them away, especially since the infestation seems under control. Is there any way for me to safely move these fabric items, or is my only safe option to toss? TIA :)

I'm a 23yo working full-time living at home with my mother (40s) and 3 younger siblings (19, 17, 17 ; all with high-functioning autism) and it feels like everyone in this house is so goddamn incompetent. Because of how everyone else is, it feels like I constantly need to be the one to "swoop in" and "save" them from whatever it is. It's hard to elaborate the extent of just how BURNT OUT I am living here because it's been years of things bothering me, and I'm very close to reaching my breaking point. (TLDR at bottom)
My main stressor is my mother. My mother is financially incompetent and owes me THOUSANDS of dollars to help her pay for rent because she literally does not know how to budget her money properly. It's nearly impossible for her. I've even went out of my way to help her create a budget NUMEROUS times, and she's never stuck to them. She hasn't asked me to help her with rent in months now, but occasionally will ask me to pay for our groceries (cool, alright) or the whole family's phone plans (uh). Both nowhere near as much as rent of course, but it's concerning me that I'm like a backup plan for my mother, because what is she going to do by the time I move out? I'm not helping her with her finances by that point. I've had friends tell me to just say no to giving her money for rent/food/phone, but my thought process is "then where is she going to get the money from? we'll lose our home. we'll starve. we won't have phone service," etc. It feels like I HAVE TO or we'll struggle. And if I can't help, it'll be my fault if things go downhill. -- Side note, she relies on me so much that she expects me to memorize her own log-ins for HER stuff. I come home from work one day and she's asking me how to log into her fucking Verizon account??? How TF would I know your password holy shit bro. Extra side note but my mom has even asked me to get a mortgage under my name and have her pay for it so she doesn't have to pay for expensive rent anymore?????? Like it's hard to really summarize what I've dealt with with her within just the past year man. lol
My 19yo sister is finished school, but unemployed. My mom has asked me many times to help her find an online job, which first of all, why the hell am I finding HER a job, and second of all, how the hell am I suppose to find her an online job that's legit and doesn't require either some form of hybrid work or degrees? She has no skills and no specific career path she's interested in that's guaranteed to make good money. And the reason why my mom is particular on her having specifically an online job is because we don't trust her to take public transit or walking on her own to her job because she doesn't pay attention at all to her surroundings. She doesn't familiarize herself with where she's going when we do go out. Besides all of this, it's stressing me out that it feels like I need to constantly baby her at her age telling her to clean her own room and do her chores, when she literally does NOTHING else in this house but play games and sit on her ass all day on her phone. She does nothing productive but will have the audacity to tell me that a few dishes and a couple large pots and pans is "too much" to do at once when cleaning dishes. Or will tell me to "hold on" while she's in the middle of a game because I'm telling her to do chores she should have already done.
My brothers who are both 17 are still in school but struggle with their classes. I'm not really frustrated with them as I am with my mother and sister, but it's an additional stress seeing them struggle in school and get upset and self-deprecate because they're failing, even though when I have told them many times over the years they can always ask me to help them out. But they never do. They struggle but ask for no help. There's only so many times I can lend a hand, but as the old saying goes "you can lead a horse to water but you can't force them to drink." I don't want to just give up on them and I want to see them succeed but like... what else can I do in this situation? Mom's too busy to help them (or honestly even check up on how they're doing in school lol) and sister's definitely not gonna help because she was in a similar situation when she was in school, even struggling to the point where she'd cry and beg to drop out, which I definitely did not allow and won't for my brothers either.
I want to leave so fucking badly but I don't have enough savings at the moment to move out with a roommate securely. I also worry alot that when I do leave, everything will crumble. My mother's barely taught my siblings how to actually be adults and they're probably just going to all end up being unemployed because my mom has no trust that they can have normal jobs and commute normally by bus/train. I worry for a situation where my mom is gone and my siblings are left scrambling unsure of what to do. I feel like it's partially my fault, but at the same time I recognize that I am not their parent and I deserve to live a life away from my household and worry about myself and my future. It doesn't feel fair man. I've been so patient with everyone. I've offered my siblings money incentives if they do their chores regularly and just do their work in school (I don't even care if they get all C's and D's, a pass is a pass. They did their best.) I've tried helping them out with school, giving them life advice, and just being a figure they can go to if they can't talk to my mom. All I can do for now is just go to work, make my money, come home, and try to avoid the things that will trigger my frustration.
Not sure what advice could be given, but any is appreciated. (and I can try to answer any potential questions)
TLDR: Mom sucks with her money and owes me money because of it. Adult sister can't act like an adult for the life of her. Teen brothers struggle in school but ask for no help from anyone despite offers. I feel like I need to save everyone but it feels like a lot on my shoulders.

TL:DR - Looking for a list of steps I can follow to guide me for AM/PM grill. Store has no hours to train me at the moment, but I really want to learn the position
Hello I want to learn grill. Unfortunately with my store’s ADS and labor right now it looks like my training is going to keep getting pushed off.
In the meantime I am trying to pick up more AM chip shifts and PM prep shifts, so that I can squeeze in minutes here and there to shadow the grill person.
Thanks for your help. Here is a cheatsheet I wrote for myself after watching the Spice Hub videos to show you where I am at with what I know:
❗️Barbacoa - put meat in pot - Medium heat until 165 for 15 seconds (stir occasionally)
❗️Carnitas - put meat in pot - Low heat until 165 for 15 seconds (stir occasionally)
❗️Beans - open bag into pot - Pour 1 cup water - Medium heat and stir - Temp to 165 - 1/3 c citrus and 1 tbsp salt and stir
❗️Chicken - 2 squirts of rice bran oil per line - Rows 1 inch apart. Start back to front - Light layer of salt 8 inches above - Cook until dark char plus whitening along sides - Flip - Submerge tong after 1st flip - 165 (temp center and corner chickens) - Cut 3/4inch (put immediately in pan while cutting more)
❗️Fajitas - 4 squirts sunflower oil - Add fajitas then 3.5 minutes - Flip with tongs - 1 minute for caramelize - Then sprinkle with salt light layer and 1 tsp dried oregano
❗️Queso - medium heat water pot 190-200 degrees - Write time on bag - 35-50 mins - Knead bag with towel - Temp to 165
❗️Rice - white: 1/2 citrus 2c cilantro 2tbsp salt - Brown: 1/4 citrus 2c cilantro 1tbsp salt
❗️Sofritas - pour medium heat stir temp to 165
❗️Steak - place 1” apart back to front - Sprinkle with salt light layer - Cook until dark char - Flip steak back to forward - Temp to 140 - Deep and cover - Trim fat - 3 steak cut at a time - Pour juice over it

Just got back from a weeklong beach vacation where the provided pots and pans were all scratched non stick, knives with literal chips in the blade, and no can opener provided. I think I’m going to have to start carrying my own stuff from now on. Does anyone here also do this? What is the best way you have found to conveniently pack your tools? The knife roll bags I have found in Amazon look kind of cheap so I would like to explore other options if anyone has suggestions.

Hi everybody,
I recently have been having a lot of digestive issues such as severe constipation and diarrhea, abdominal pain, bloating, etc. that have been worse than my normal level of symptoms (I was diagnosed with IBS a couple of years ago). I am currently waiting a couple of months to be able to get in with my GI doctor, however I am trying any method I can to relieve symptoms right now, since I am a college student about to graduate and I cannot get behind in my classes more than I already have (from these issues).
I have eliminated dairy before and found dairy was not an issue, so I figured while I am waiting, maybe I should try eliminating gluten as well, to see if gluten intolerance could be the issue (I was blood tested for celiacs a couple of years ago and those results were negative). I was wondering for the elimination if I should just be avoiding gluten in products I am eating, or if I should avoid it "severely", like separate my pots, pans, plates, etc. from my roommates who do eat gluten, and not eat anything that is made in a facility that also makes gluten containing products.