Two word sayings

Hey everyone. My (32m) roommate (38m) and I got priced out of Park Slope and relocated to Washington Heights earlier this year. It’s cool, much different and reminds me of “South Slope” down in the 50s, but one thing I noticed is these Spanish women do not age.
I noticed one lady with an amazing figure walking with a youngster like 5 years old getting off the A train. I walked alongside her and then heard the kid call her “abuela” — I thought she was the mom!
I looked at her face for like 30 seconds and I would’ve said early thirties but I looked at her hands and guessed late 50s…
I’ve been going to a restaurant that sells “mofongo” this kind of food that’s name I thought was a swear word but it’s pretty just mashed potatoes and meats. The waitress there is gorgeous and suggested I try the “arrows con poyo” that had a lot of orange rice and chicken that you can’t find outside of that one restaurant. I had six Presidente beers and talked to the waitress lady all night in Spanglish. I made a move and we ended up back at my place and ended up hooking up.
What first gave me pause was the mesh bra and tan “granny” style panty that she wore to the top of her abdomen. It was pretty hot but when I looked at her the next morning, she went from like 38 to 62. It turns out she was 71 but honest to god she looked great. She had one of those “Jitterbug” and said “omgah 22 miss call from Giancarlo,” who turned out to be her boyfriend who’s jacked and pitches for a local softball team. Now I can’t go there anymore and Gian is now coming by building a lot with some guys I see playing dominoes by the small park.
My roommate told the group chat of our friends, one that I’m not in for some reason, and two of them just blocked me. One dude sees me and says in a playful animated voice, “what’s up you mother… I mean GRAND mother fucker…” and it’s been very embarrassing.
So I guess I’m self conscious now that about my white cis het male gaze and wonder what I should do about it…

Bold title, no? Unlike Adora’s backgrounds, it’s not rage bait. i ask anyone who is skeptical or even fearsome about possibly denying Adora’s identity as a lesbian to carefully read my words, and interpret them in the most positive way possible (iykyk).
What is a lesbian? Simply put, a lesbian is a woman who is attracted solely to other women. Some people say females attracted to females but I don’t hold to that definition since trans men exist and although they’re female, they’re not the same as women.
How does Adora define the word “lesbian”? In countless lives, Adora has claimed lesbian to mean “a non-man attracted to other non-men”.
Is this just a verbal dispute? Women are technically non-men. Aren’t you basically saying the same thing? No. To all of that. We’re saying completely different things and please allow me to explain.
I’m not going to get into the feminism of why “non-man” is disgustingly misogynistic, because let’s face it— it does not seem as though misogyny is something Adora is worried about perpetuating. Let’s break down the words instead. “Non-man” is broad. It simply refers to anyone who is not a man. But what is a man? Regardless of your view on the sex-gender distinction, we can all agree on one thing— men are adults. A boy isn’t a man, he’s a child. Is a boy a lesbian as long as he’s attracted to other children regardless of gender? Under adora’s definition, yes. A boy WOULD be considered a lesbian because he is not yet a man.
That’s problem #1. We have to be more specific. Otherwise, there is absolutely no meaning to the words we say. My definition, women attracted to women, provides far more utility while being concise and specific. Woman = adult human female. This definition includes trans women (psycho-socially) while keeping out children. Yes, this would exclude nonbinary people, but the word is exclusive by nature. Non binary people are not women. “Lesbian” has always been used mono-sexually (sexually attracted to one gender). Women who are ONLY attracted to other women are by definition lesbians. Women attracted to women and nonbinary people would not be monosexual. They are BISEXUAL at least. Ask any bisexual woman if she’s a lesbian. The answer will be a staunch NO.
Adora— if you like women and nonbinary people, you might be bi, pan, etc. If you only like women then woohoo you’re a lesbian. Hijacking the word “lesbian” to avoid labeling yourself as bi or something similar is inherently biphobic and lesbophobic.
I wavered on whether or not I’d speak on this at length until today when Adora proudly proclaimed that any definition of lesbian besides “non man attracted to non men” is transphobic. It’s not transphobic to say words have meaning. Nobody is denying anyone’s gender identity. We’re simply saying that “lesbian” already has a meaning. And someone being attracted to 2 or more genders already has a name too!! They are bisexual, at least. If the latter is you, Adora, you have 2 logical paths. Either stop claiming the lesbian label, OR, admit you still subconsciously see at least some nonbinary people as women. It’s okay to be bi. What’s not okay is denying that nonbinary people are just that— not binary.
That’s my logical argument. Now for a more emotional one. I, and many other women, have struggled for years to accept the label of lesbian. Online, it is easy to proudly proclaim it because i dont know yall and yall dont know me. You don’t know the people around me, you dont know my family. But in real life, there is still a lot of shame and stigma surrounding being a woman who is solely attracted to other women. I’m not even out to my parents or siblings as a lesbian. They know i’m not straight, but they don’t know I’m exclusively into women. For a man to come out as gay, nobody bats an eyelash anymore. Sure they might get homophobic remarks here and there, but nobody is looking at them differently as men. But if a woman is a lesbian, homophobia AND misogyny rear theirs ugly heads and her whole purpose in life is questioned. What will she do if she’s not contributing to the world as a wife and mother? (Not to say lesbians can’t get married and have kids, but the process is harder and seen by some as less legitimate). Even today, as women, our proximity to men is still held above our heads. Sure, women can get bank accounts without a husband’s signature and vote for themselves now. But men still see us as an extension of our husbands. They see two women together and think we’re just playing house till we find the “right man”. We’re fetishized, infantilized, and downright devalued as soon as we accept our label. Did you know “lesbian” is the number 1 searched category for porn? Men make up 80% of porn-watchers alone. Do you really believe it’s the 20% of women on these sites searching for lesbian porn? No. Lesbians are still seen as something for men’s enjoyment and consumption. We, as gay women, are still fighting to be viewed as legitimate, normal, human beings with our own thoughts, feelings, hopes, and dreams. Adora, if it is the case that you’re attracted to women and nonbinary people, it seems to me that you trying on the most controversial label and re-defining it to piss people off and make lesbians’ already difficult existence even more difficult.
To everyone else: please do not make transphobic remarks under this post. I believe trans women are women and therefore can fit under my definition of lesbian. I’m not saying Adora isn’t a lesbian because she’s trans. I’m saying Adora would not be a lesbian if she’s attracted to 2 or more genders.
If anyone has any questions, please comment. I’ll try to get to as many as possible to clear up any miscommunication and things of the sort. Please remember that I am human and may not mean something the way you read it. It’s ok to ask for clarification. Also I forgive myself for any misspeaking (iykyk).

No one has to read this. I don't even know if this is due to my partners ADHD, or rather, how much of it, if any...
Brain Dump
I feel sad I feel confused I feel abandoned I feel extremely frustrated I feel betrayed I feel resentment I feel annoyed I feel wrath
Ultimately, I don't feel security, love, safety, partnership, trust or protection.
Isn't the point of being in a partnership ... all of the above? When one man is down, the other man has their back?
In ways, I can see where my husband tries to show up and help - but it is in the way he wants to show up - the easy/convenient way. Perhaps that is all he is capable of? Perhaps that is all he is truly willing to do. I just don't buy the fact that he doesn't know how, otherwise. I know he has ADHD - but is it so severe that he is truly incapable of planning ANYTHING? Making appointments? Adulting in anyway? I feel bad complaining and am confused over the fact that he does "help" ... and he does "try" (I think? I'm not so sure). I'm confused about how to feel regarding his ADHD. Is he so impaired, truly impaired that he cannot plan anything or put forth effort?
I guess as I'm writing this out it is the effort part that I have frustration with. Maybe inwardly he truly feels like he is trying his hardest. I mean he did buy me hair ties on two occasions, the second time stopping to get the correct ones (which he did not have to do). That is unusually thoughtful of him. He also got flowers for mothers day and a card (but my 7 year old was with him and I'm convinced she saw the mothers day cards first and then told him she wanted a card, he followed suit. Then went to walmart and got flowers. This is really the first time he has done anything for mothers day (well bought something, as nothing was done for mothers day - typical day for me). But here I sit, still confused. Am I being ungrateful? I mean, he DID do these things and he didn't have to. Again, it is the effort (it was a matter of convenience). It is the thoughtfulness. It is thinking about someone else besides himself (or better yet, being out from behind his phone screen just long enough to form a thought - let alone a thought about others and how he can make their life better and show up for them).
Effort. That's an interesting word. Effort can mean different things to different people. Does he TRULY think he is putting forth as much effort as he can, or is at least aware of it and is consistently trying? Does he look up videos and articles and seek out coaching or resources to understand his personal challenges with ADHD? Does he strive for improvement everyday? Does he work on his thought process, telling himself he can improve and will? Or does he just self loathe, pity and wallow. And yet - another juxtaposition.
The times I have tried to communicate with him about how desperate our situation is, how much despair our marriage and family is in - he continues to sit there silent and say nothing. We cannot ever resolve ANYTHING. There is no conversation, teamwork, or resolution. It's just me having to deal with it. How have I survived 17 years of this (with 4 kids and a business?!) The other night he did cry pretty hard, trying to choke back tears, and here I am ... laying beside him, feeling no empathy. What is this existence? I have never felt true APATHY. Esp about someone I care about (even those that I don't know or care about). He is boo-hooing and all I can say is "yeah - I've been there, many times. It fucking hurts doesn't it?" I did not say it in a rude, 'I'm going to get you back way.' Just a flat statement that, otherwise uttered from my lips would hold some empathy and understanding behind it.
I am less empathetic and patient with my kids. I never wanted to turn into this person - and yet, I'm slipping slowly. I've been fighting it for so long. One of my best (and worst) qualities was the ability to truly care for others (including strangers) and feel true sympathy and empathy for them. To hold space for them. To CARE. Is this the definition of jaded? Bitter? Scorned?
I've slowly been losing my brightness, my spark, my light. Over the last 2 years I hard core burnt out, hit rock bottom, could barely function (and yet, still had to, at least on the days I could get out of bed). My bulb went completely out, completely burnt out and beyond (I never knew it could get that severe). I've gotten some light back, but it's just dim enough to see on a pitch black night. I have fought for my sleep disorder, worked with doctors, and after years, have finally found a combination of meds that seem to be working for me (depression, anxiety, pmdd - or is it all a result of living with an adhd partner? gosh, I don't know).
I've struggled to be a nurturing mom since the beginning. Not because I am not capable of it - but because there has always been an imbalance in our relationship and I've always been in this position. One foot on a just big-enough platform and the other foot/leg tucked up by my knee, much like a flamingo. I am a flamingo. I am a FLAMINGO?!
No, if I were a flamingo I would have a truly mated pair; an involved other parent. I would have a social network, life-long friendships and webbed feet that allow me to gracefully glide through the water. If I were a flamingo, my feet would be missing the webbing - I would endlessly and relentlessly paddle and barely move forward. The effort would be tremendous. If I were a flamingo, my partner flamingo would use his webbed feet and swim way ahead, only noticing my absence far after the fact. If I were a flamingo, I would be balanced and in harmony - effortlessly existing, surrounded by a true supportive network and love.
But I am not a flamingo. (Well that's a relief ... I guess).
Back to the nurturing mom thing; I have always been patient and caring and kind. I have always wanted children. I feel robbed in a sense. I genuinely believe - if I had a supportive, present, partner, who had a zeal for life and poured love into his kids - well, I would be the nurturing person I know I am (strike that word through), WAS. I mourn for her. I do not think I will ever get her back. She was a good person. She was a good mom. She was a good wife. She was a good friend. She was a good daughter.
I never wanted to pass down this broken/dysfunctional family. This lack of support network.
I often utter "I have a husband, but I don't have a husband" or "I have a sister, mom/dad, brother - but yet I don't have a sister, mom/dad, brother". My grandmother lives less than 30 minutes away - yet I've only really met her less than 10 times. She tells my mother that she feels like no one cares about her. I feel that way. I think my parents feel that way. My sister feels that way. What is this generational curse? I worked tirelessly, for 15+ years, to work on my inward self, my wounded self, my habits and behaviors and to change them. I did, successfully. My husband would never get on board.
He refuses to learn anything new. He refuses to work on himself. He refuses to work on anything - really. That's a topic for another post.
Overall,
It is hard to filter out what is ADHD and what is lack of effort or care. I know internal struggles cannot be seen by others (believe me, I've experienced amany, and continue to do so). I think the difference is that I am comfortable sitting alone. I am comfortable being present. I am willing to self reflect, study, learn, adjust behaviors, take responsibility etc. And even if I do not succeed, I keep trying. It is evident. My efforts can be seen. I talk about it, I care about it, I strive for it, I request participation from my partner (or friends etc) to learn with me etc...
But yet - I remain alone.
I've grown leap years as a person throughout our 17 years of marriage, and well - my husband remains mostly the same. He truly keeps his head buried in the sand like an ostrich. He pretends like things are not happening, if I express how serious something is, he has no urgency and thinks I'm overreacting. He often thinks, "we will deal with it when we cross that bridge" - the thing is, by the time I'm expressing to him any hint of concern, it is something that needs to be addressed and taken care of. When he says "we" will deal with it later, what he means is, YOU will deal with it later. I will put it off and out of mind, and somehow for him things always magically work out. His refusal to participate in activities gives me no choice but to juggle the zillion balls and handle things alone. It feels as if I'm stranded out at sea and he could reach for a life preserver. If only he would look up from his phone.
Do I believe he is a good person? Yes (well, I think). If this were a true scenario, yes, he would throw me a preserver BUT only after he has heard me ask multiple times (or maybe he didn't hear me bc he was zone out on his phone). Only after I have expressed to him how my small dingy was taking on water, to which he would likely respond 'you'll be fine' or 'it's not that bad' or some variation of the implication of "you're overreacting". No sir, you are underreacting.
I'm going to sum this up because I need to get back to my studies. I promised my 7 year old daughter that I would be home in about an hour to take her out on a mini date. I have barely seen my kids over the last month. I am working my ass off to ensure we will be okay (that's a post for a different date).
Signed,
Beyond Exhausted. Fumigated?! There isn't a word to describe how I feel.
dx

I was banned recently for just merely asking for credit if anyone used my fucking voice to animate using it. Fuck Discord. Apparently this counted as, “Self Promotion.” Fuck Discord. All I said was if anyone wanted to use my fucking voice for any fucking reason in any fucking video, to simply use my Discord name as credit. Fuck Discord. I spent months upon months in that fucking server, sent a link to funny video or two, and then left for hours at a time. Fuck Discord. I fucking hate the app, I hate its User Interface, I hate how it has zero tutorials when using the app for the first time. Fuck Discord. I hate how I cannot have multiple accounts on the fucking app, I had to delete my first one, then I had to create a new account with a different email, to just try and do something but I cannot. Fuck Discord. I hate it, I tried to use it years ago and couldn’t understand how to use it, so I deleted the app. Fuck Discord. Half a year ago, I reinstalled the app and wanted to have fun, and I did for some time, but the moment I ask for credit for using my actual voice in a set of video recordings, I get fucking banned. Fuck Discord. I’m never going to reinstall the app ever again until the day I fucking die. I’ll also say it one more time for good luck Fuck Discord.

[First] [Prev] [Next]
Meanwhile, things had been changing in Xinguo. Although the situation hadn't changed drastically since the early 1550s, there are several important things to take note of. Firstly, North Province Governor Wei Chengjia died of natural causes in 1570 and was succeeded by his son, Wei Yonglong. At forty-seven years of age, Yonglong was more than ready to finally take the reigns of power. He was known to be hot-headed and looking to expand North Province's borders. Bai Guguan, who was eleven years younger than Wei Chengjia, was still governing in the south.
Secondly, the building of forts and outfitting of the Nine Anti-Piracy Expeditions had taken a heavy toll on the finances of the two provinces. To make matters worse, both were now involved in costly wars with hostile native groups on the frontiers.
In the north, the frontier began at a gap in the mountains through which flowed the Pit River. The Pit River was named for the Pit Trappers, a group of two closely-related tribes whose favourite method of hunting deer involved luring them into camouflaged pits, where the hunters could then finish them off. In times of war, the same pits could be adapted for use against humans.
A group of North Province merchants formed the Pit River Society in 1551 to trade with the Pit Trappers. However, in 1569, a series of trade disputes between the Pit River Society and the Pit Trapper tribes culminated in the latter destroying the former's main trading post of Bright Valuables. This kicked off the long and costly Pit River War between North Province and the Pit River Alliance. Wei Yonglong wanted to use the war to expand his borders at the Pit Trappers' expense, but the Pit Trappers knew their country like the backs of their hands. It was heavily forested with a lot of rocky hillsides and waterfalls, making it hard to navigate for large military forces. Additionally, apart from the woodland tracks the Pit Trappers used, there weren't any roads, making resupply a tricky business. Thanks to knowledge of the terrain, clever use of traps, and hit-and-run tactics, the Pit Trappers were able to repel the invasions Wei Yonglong sent their way year after year. That was until the typhoid epidemic of 1580-81 severely depleted the Pit Trapper population. Surrender came in 1583, by which time the Pit Trappers had been nearly destroyed.
At the same time, South Province was engaged in a war far from its own borders in the Red Rock country. Settlement of the lower Red Rock River had begun in the early 1550s. An ever-growing population in the Valley was looking for more places to settle, and the Red Rock country was an appealing destination. Inhabiting the area were a group of related peoples whom the Xinguans collectively called the Cloudy Tribes. The name derives from the Haowei tribe's name for the Red Rock River, “Xawiƚƚ kwii,” or Cloudy River (literally: river cloud).
Bai Guguan began sending envoys to the Cloudy Tribes in 1550 to negotiate the purchase of land for people to settle on. He purchased plots of land at the mouth of the Red Rock and built a fort there to be the springboard for further settlement. A few villages sprouted up in the area. However, negotiation was slow. The Cloudy Tribes were diverse and decentralised. Many were loathe to give up their land. Although they'd heard about the destruction wrought by Xinguan gunpowder and steel from the Valley to the Golden Mountains, the threat seemed very far away to them, and they were sure they could handle anything that came their way in the immediate future.
While negotiations dragged on, Bai sent several exploratory expeditions to map out the region. He then used these maps to draw up preliminary plans for prefectures, counties, and major settlement locations. Negotiations continued to be slow, but Bai took his time, believing there was no need to rush.
In January 1556, the worst earthquake in Chinese history hit Shaanxi province. Beyond being a humanitarian catastrophe, the outcome relevant to Xinguo was that many people decided to seek new lives across the sea. Ningbo, Dongguang, and other coastal cities of Xinguo were flooded with people that summer in an unprecedented immigration wave called the Earthswept Migration. In 1556 and the next few years, at least 100,000 people moved to Xinguo, likely a lot more, since women and girls weren't always registered on the immigration lists. Most of these people were Mandarin-speakers (or Jin-speakers, which is closely related to Mandarin). Neither the northerners nor the southerners were particularly welcoming to the newcomers, with whom they did not share a language, and whom they saw as an unwashed mass of interlopers.
Arriving penniless and with little more than the clothes on their backs, the Earthswept refugees drifted from city to village looking for work and finding little. Some turned to banditry to steal what they could not earn, or were themselves preyed upon by bandits, who sold them into slavery. Crime rates rose and people demanded the governors come up with a solution.
Besides cracking down on banditry, Bai Guguan kicked his plans into overdrive. He published his preliminary prefectural plan as the official settlement plan for the Red Rock country and began selling huge tracts of land in the new prefectures. Those who purchased these tracts divided them into sections and sold them off. Finally, family-sized plots of land were sold at grand auctions held in the public squares of all the major cities and many of the smaller market towns. Earthswept refugees flocked to the auctions, which were publicised well in advance. Since most of them had very little money, they had to buy land on credit extended to them by the landowners.
There were, however, two problems with this plan. First, the Red Rock River was a long way outside the Valley, making it too expensive for penniless refugees to travel there, nor did they have the capital to get a farm up and running once they arrived. Second, negotiations with the Cloudy Tribes were still dragging, so most of the land that Bai had just sold didn't actually belong to him.
The first problem was solved by the provincial government offering low-interest loans to the major landowners, who offered loans in turn to the refugees so they could afford to buy passage to the Red Rock, not to mention tools, seeds, supplies, and livestock for starting a farm. This made them doubly indebted to the landowners.
Meanwhile, Bai Guguan made those same landowners into magistrates of the new prefectures and counties. In fact, they were no mere magistrates, but magnates with near-total social and economic power over the doubly-indebted refugees, who may as well have been their serfs. It was feudalism dressed up as a bureaucracy—the same kind of system already prevalent in the rest of Xinguo, but with fewer checks on the magnates' power.
The second problem was addressed, rather than solved, by selling cheap weapons to the serfs and dramatically increasing the military presence in the region.
All this occurred in less than a year in the latter half of 1556 and the first few months of the next year. By March, 1557, people were already moving to the mouth of the Red Rock River. In the following months, more and more people poured in. Not only did this alleviate the refugee problem, but the Red Rock settlers sent word back to their families in China and thousands more migrants crossed the ocean.
Of course, none of the Cloudy Tribes had been consulted on any of this. The only warning they had was that Bai Guguan did them the courtesy of sending out a wave of envoys to the disparate tribes asking them to reconsider their stances on the sale of land, since settlers were going to be coming soon. Then suddenly, they were hit by what seemed like a tidal wave of newcomers settling on their land without asking permission or begging forgiveness. Reactions were mixed. Some decided to take as good a deal as they could now, before the killing began, and hastily entered negotiations to sell their land. Others became violent. Many a new settler was found tortured to death in his homestead for trespassing. Later, when women and children began arriving, they were either killed alongside the men or kidnapped and enslaved or assimilated into the tribe.
So began the Cloudy War. It was long and brutal, with many atrocities on both sides. There was no formal beginning or end to the war. It began with a rapid escalation to violence in 1557, and slowly wound down in the mid-70s only to flare up again in the early 1580s. Toward the end of the 1580s it slowly wound down as one tribe after another accepted the new situation they found themselves in. It finally came to an end with the last treaty signed with the last free Mahawei band in 1589.
[Next]

(apologies if this gets a bit rambly. I'm just super hyped about these developments, and I wanted to share them with others who might understand)
It's been a few months since I started to realize I'm part of a system. I've been really trying to open up communication to get to know my headmates, but the most we managed (aside from one stressful incident I haven't been able to recreate under normal circumstances) was all very vague emotions tossed at each other with maybe two or three words attached.
This morning I suddenly remembered all those times I would "zone out" while drawing something and have a full sketch in front of me when I zoned back in. It suddenly clicked that I may not have been the one drawing those things, so I got out some paper to test my hypothesis, and... it worked!
It was such a surreal experience watching my hand (our hand I guess) drawing without controlling it myself, but it was super cool! Jon drew pictures of himself and a couple other headmates (one of which I didn't even know about until today), He couldn't seem to get out any Actual Words beyond their names and answering a couple yes/no questions, but it's off to a great start!
Next time we go shopping I think I'm gonna pick up an actual sketchbook for Jon (or whoever else) to draw in whenever he wants. I think that will be a great development in our journey into plurality, so I'm super hyped to make that next step!

Now, this is just my opinion on what I would love to see in a Halloween video game, but I would like to hear what yours are. Anyway, let's begin.
The Time-line(s)!
The game would have to timeliness to focus on, the main one being the Thorn Trilogy, the other is the H20 Time-line which you have to unlock after beating the original Time-line.
When they take place!
Both Timeliness take place in the year 2008, the first year that ends with an 8 to not have a Michael Myers movie.
Who's in the game?
In Time-line 1, Kara Strode is now married to Tommy Doyle and have a ten year old daughter named Laurie Doyle, while Kara's son Dan is off getting his bachelor's degree and is a serious relationship with someone; oh, and Kara and Tommy are the foster parents of thirteen year old Steven Lloyd Doyle.
In the 2nd Time-line, we use the script from what would have been Mustafa Akkad's sequel to Halloween Resurrection called Halloween Retribution but remove/change the part at the end where John Tate/Laurie's son stares into the eyes of Michael's mask that he removed before The Shape fell into the beyond freezing waters of the frozen lake and finally died. Instead, John just places the mask on a rock and burns it.
Game Play!
Game play would be just like Friday The 13th 2018 and the Saw video games. You will be tracing Michael's steps if you're playing as either Kara, Tommy, John and or former Sheriff Bracket, as well as Michael Myers your stalking and hunting them and others.
Finally!
I chose these two Timeliness because they are the only ones at this time that have ended in a cliffhanger, and I freaking hate everything that ends and that has ended in a cliffhanger.
The End!
I don't know what else to say, other than maybe a total of 31 levels and 10 flashbacks from Michael's childhood, representing October 31st, the date of Halloween. So I'm done, that's it.

Yesterday, I had an argument with a customer about his access point package. Despite my and my coworker’s friendly, reassuring tone, the dipshit felt the need to be sarcastic and demean people who were genuinely trying to help him (as UPS store customers tend to do). I got used to this in my year working there but I suppose this guy in particular really got under my skin. I responded to him in the same sarcastic manner prompting him to try to get around the counter to fight me, but he was stopped by two customers from the line (yeah, there was a line out the door). In the middle of this spectacle our driver arrives with the guy’s package. I ignore his yapping, keep attending to the line, and my coworker hands him his package. Like 5 minutes after he’s gone he’s back right outside the door shouting more insults at me. I ran outside to confront him (poor judgement, I know). We are separated by bystanders and he leaves once again. He then gets in contact with my store owner and they meet at a nearby restaurant. The customer then brandishes his concealed weapon to the owner inside the restaurant and tells him “look what I could’ve done to your boy” (me). The owner comes back, tells me about their meeting, and terminates me. But the most bewildering thing is this; he gives the guy a free mailbox for a year.
I realize I handed the situation poorly. I realize I should’ve been fired. I realize I could’ve been fucking shot. But was the free year really necessary? You would all agree if you met this customer, he’s about as insufferable and nitpicky as it gets. You DO NOT want this guy in particular frequenting your store with a gun, for free no less.
Final tidbit: The guy was back in the store today meeting with the owner again. He took the chance to try and chat with my coworker, telling her a bunch of things she didn’t care to pay attention to, until he pulled out his phone and showed her a picture of him in his security uniform, armed. Then he says “If only I’d been here like this yesterday, what I would’ve done to him”.
Am I the only one who sees how insane this is?

I am a UU atheist, and my mother was asking me what it is about religion that attracts me as an atheist, and I have been struggling to put it into words. I am curious what other atheists would say.

I know I’m the A**hole in this story but anyway.
Me (28F) and my current boyfriend (28) have been in a relationship for almost a year now. Couple of months ago my bf calls me up stating that a girl from my instagram following has been texting him for a day or two. She has been sending flirtatious texts to him which he didn’t respond to initially but when she started spewing bullshit about me, he politely asked her to stop and reminded her that he is my boyfriend not a fling. She took that as an opportunity to text further and also sent him a semi naked picture of hers.
When he told me all of this, I immediately knew who it was because she has done this is past with the guys I was going out with. I never did anything about it because none of those guys ever got the opportunity to become my boyfriend and handle my tantrums. Except this time, it was my boyfriend who is a very sweet person and I would like to keep him in my life.
A little background about little miss dumbo. She was in a relationship with my friend(Vik) who I’m not so close with which is why I didn’t think much of it when she texted the other guys I dated. I know Vik through mutual friends and have met him couple of times only.
Coming back to the story I called up my best friend to ask what to do about this situation. Turns out she did the same her too.
It was time that we take this bitch down. I called up Vik and told him the entire story. I did politely ask about their relationship status first before I blabbed the entire story. Turns out they broke up because she was cheating on him with multiple guys. I asked him when they broke up because if she was single while she was texting my past dates, it would not matter that much. But sadly they were in a relationship when she was texting and stalking our dates. They ended a 9 year relationship. Me and my best friend consoled Vik and told him to forget about her.
Fast forward to a week ago. Vik being the fool that he is, forgave her and also told her that I complained about her sending my boyfriend texts. She immediately texted me saying that I’m trying to create unnecessary feud between her and Vik. When i confronted that she did text my bf, she gave me the lame excuse of not knowing who my boyfriend was as she thought he is just another fling and that instagram is a social media platform and she can text whoever she wants to. I reminder her that she has done this in past and yet I never said anything to Vik but this time it was my boyfriend. When she couldn’t prove any point she started spewing bullshit again stating that I’m a whore who sleeps around with men whereas she is in 9 year relationship and I’m just jealous and don’t have guts to face her. I called her immediately, which she disconnected of course stating that she doesn’t have time. I reminded her that it takes less seconds to talk than to text. I swear Common sense is not that common. Enraged she started saying bullshit about my character, work, my accent and my family and upbringing. I had enough. You wanna talk shit about me. Cool. Not my family. I grew up without a mother. I reminded her that I’m not the one who cheated, I have a way better high paying job than her and unlike her I don’t have to lick people’s butt to grow in my field. Also she should be able to understand my accent better since she literally did her undergrads in English communication and yet she can’t speak it properly. I also told her that I won’t demean her parents because I’m sure they did everything possible from their end to provide for her but you can’t fix a defective product. She blocked me after this.
But I wasn’t done because what she said at first was so worse that i can’t even write it here. But just for the gist, she called me a prostitute and that I should be raped.
I screen recorded the entire conversation. Sent it to Vik, posted it online and tagged her. We had a mutual whatsapp group which was created for updates of her birthday last year and I was still a member. I sent the screen recording there as well. When I tell you, so many other women from her circle texted back stating she did the same with their men. I was baffled.
I knew which company she was working at, the HR was my close friend. I sent a copy to them as well along with the texts of the ‎WhatsApp group. I called the HR friend and specifically asked to get her fired somehow. I know this would be unethical but guess what? She wasn’t so great at her job either and took a lot of leaves stating that she was taking care of her boyfriend Vil who supposedly suffers from Osteoporosis. We matched the timeline of her leaves and it didn’t add up as they were separated and my friend doesn’t have any disease. She got fired the very next day. The last time I saw her, I was waving her goodbye from the HR office.

You guys🎤🥁🎤🥁🎤 Why we are not talking more about this series!! I didn’t finish it yet, I only finished Beauty and the Mustache and Truth and Beard. I loved them. There was unnecessary gap or two in the plot. But I loved the characters and the writing. I like a storyline where I don’t feel like the MCs are living in an isolated island, where they don’t have family, friends or any living being in sight. I laughed out loud on the sayings such as melting my butter😂😂😂 I don’t know if this is “ and other sayings” used in the country or not but I am definitely gonna use it from now on.
Beards, brothers, and bikers! Oh my!
Identical twins Beau and Duane Winston might share the same devastatingly handsome face, but where Beau is outgoing and sociable, Duane is broody and reserved. This is why perpetually level-headed Jessica James has been in naïve and unhealthy infatuation with Beau Winston for most of her life. Whereas Duane and Jessica have always been adversaries. She can’t stand him, and she’s pretty sure he can’t stand the sight of her…
But after a case of mistaken identity, Jessica finds herself in a massive confusion kerfuffle. Jessica James has spent her whole life paralyzed by the fantasy of Beau and her assumptions of Duane’s disdain; therefore she’s unprepared for the reality that is Duane’s insatiable interest, as well as his hot hands and hot mouth and hotter looks.
When Jessica finds herself drawn to the man who was always her adversary, how much of her level-head heart is she willing to risk?

Hey everyone. My (32m) roommate (38m) and I got priced out of Park Slope and relocated to Washington Heights earlier this year. It’s cool, much different and reminds me of “South Slope” down in the 50s, but one thing I noticed is these Spanish women do not age.
I noticed one lady with an amazing figure with a youngster like 5 years old who was getting off the A train. I walked along side her and then heard the kid call her “abuela” — I thought she was the mom! I looked at her face for like 30 seconds and I would’ve said early thirties but I looked at her hands and guessed late 50s…
I’ve been going to a restaurant that sells “mofongo” this kind of food that’s name I thought was a swear word. The waitress there is gorgeous and suggested I try the “arrows cone poyo” that had a lot of orange rice and chicken and you can’t find outside of that one restaurant. I have six Presidente beers and talked to the waitress lady all night in Spanglish. I made a move and we ended up back at my place and ended up hooking up.
What first gave me pause was the mesh bra and tan “granny” style panty that she wore to the top of her abdomen. It was pretty hot but when I looked at her the next morning, she went from like 38 to 62. It turns out she was 71 but honest to god she looked great. She had one of those “Jitterbug” and said “omgah 22 miss call from Giancarlo,” who turned out to be her boyfriend who’s jacked and pitches for a local softball team. Now I can’t go there anymore and Gian is now coming by building a lot with some guys I see playing dominoes by the small park.
My roommate told the group chat of our friends, one that I’m not in for some reason, and two of them just blocked me. One dude sees me and says in a playful animated voice, “what’s up you mother… I mean GRAND mother fucker…” and it’s been very embarrassing.
So I guess I’m self conscious now that about my white cis het male gaze and wonder what I should do about it…

Ok so intro and background info : I’m f16 my now ex is m16 going on 17 in one month. We broke up a week before prom, (may 3) on the night of prom we had consensual intimacy but after that the night was weird and he was weird. So then about two weeks later we got back together and I broke it off. Then about a week later I went over to his house to help out his mom because me and her are close and we have a bond. (We dated on and off for almost 2 years). So that day we came from school went to his house and as we’re in his house his mom went back to work and what not. So I’m taking out his baby sisters braids and he was being awkward and stuff but it was wtv then he started touching my boob and I didn’t want it and I told him no touchy touchy he said oh right sorry. Then after I finished her hair she went upstairs and I was drinking some juice and he was sitting infront of me in a chair and I was like what? He was like nothing. Then he started touching my thigh and stuff and I didn’t want it but this time I didn’t say anything all he asked was if I was in my period. I said no he was like ok. So then he put his fingers where they don’t belong then did that and when he took them out I was bleeding so fast forward cleaned up and went to the bathroom and I called him to pass me a pad and he was like can I come in I was like yeah he came in and then I was putting on my stuff. Then we switched I stood up and he sat on the seat in the bathroom and he was starting to do my breast again but before that he kissed me and I was trying to talk to him abt our relationship and he was like can we just enjoy this moment and he started to do my breast and take off my pants and I was like no I don’t want too he kept on and he was like one time please we never get to f like this and I was like No I don’t want to he turned me around and started to push my back down I was resisting his grip and then I was like No I don’t want to plus I’m bleeding to much. He was like ok lemme just put it in one time and so I gave in and was like fine I didn’t enjoy it and so after he did that I stood up after the 4 stroke and started pulling up my garments and was like wait what happen I said nothing I’m bleeding and I don’t want to do this And he was like oh ok. So then after I wiped and pulled up my stuff then I wiped his area and then I was like I want to talk and and he offered to use a spare bed room upstairs but I said no cuz I knew what would happen then he kept saying ok what if I just bend you over here and give you back shots and I was like No. I don’t remeber much after but then I ended up giving in and was like fine and he started to do me and I low key was abt to start crying cuz before that at one point he was like idk if it was jokingly but he said if you don’t you can’t leave mind you he’s bigger stronger and it’s a small bathroom so I was fine and I gave in. then after he started to push my backdown after turning me and around forcefully after me saying No again and yeah again then I finally put on my clothes he put my shirt on for me and finally we left the bathroom… I guess now I’m realizing it today what happened cause it wasn’t enjoyable at the parts of force after repeatedly saying no to him. But idk I feel like it was SA or assault or guilt trip idk but some feed back would be nice sorry for the long story.

Our google fiber went out on Saturday afternoon. On Thursday evening, after having three (four??) rounds of techs out here and being on the phone with customer service for 45 minutes every evening, we still haven't gotten a straight answer on what the problem even is. Every time a tech is out here they say it's a backend issue, and every time we call customer service they say that nothing's wrong and we need to get another tech out. The outage map shows no outage at our address and it seems like we're the only ones in the neighborhood that this is affecting.
The last tech that came out here said something like, "well, the second time we escalate it they usually will actually fix it" -- but that was two days ago now with no update. Don't consider myself to be a really pissy person, and I've previously been really happy with GFiber service, but I'm considering cancelling at this rate. Six days without an ETA or even an explanation of what's happened is totally and completely unacceptable.
Looking for any advice on who to contact or how to escalate the issue -- for reference, this is in Austin. I'm sick of calling customer service when it seems like it's impossible to get a genuine response.

In 2018-2019 I used to have an Instagram account whose username I sadly can't remember anymore (it was an anon account, I only used it a few times). I am not very sure, but there is a possibility I tied it to my old number that is now being used by someone else. I have two questions:-

1. Is there any way I can confirm that it is indeed tied to this number? Since I really can't seem to remember. I also remember I disabled contact syncing on it.
   
2. Let's say the number is tied to it. Will the person who currently has my old number be able to access it? Is there any way I can prevent that? I really don't want this as it had private stuff I don't want anyone to see.
   

Help would be really appreciated.