gm everyone, i'd like to have your thoughts on this. i randomly decided to look at the Bed Bath chart and noticed something odd. last trading day was on may 2nd 2023 and delisting on may 3rd.
now 2 weeks ago GME had its first small but noticeable bump upwards on may 2nd and then lots more volume coming in the day after. what a cohencidence! do you think there could be a connection? some contract expiring after exactly 1 year? haven't really followed the events around that bankruptcy.
keep in mind this was still one week before we saw any activity from DFV

[I just recently learned of this community after I had shared this in the raisedbynarcissists sub, and I couldn't figure out how to crosspost it so I'm just copy&pasting]
As the title states, (and despite the existential risk to myself - as I am disabled, impoverished, and my survival is reliant on the room I rent in her attic - given her recent threat to have have me thrown out by the police because she could not handle the feelings she had during the argument that she initiated), I have finally drawn a bright red line in the metaphorical sand regarding my nMom's treatment of me. This is the culmination of 8+ years of sustained, one-sided, unreciprocated, and unsuccessful effort on my part to sustain, salvage, repair, or improve our "relationship".
 
Reading through some of the posts on this sub over the past day or so has been very validating, as one thing she's always been extremely committed to is making sure she's the loudest voice in my life telling me how invalid all of my emotions and experiences and realities are.
 
I am very grateful for anyone who takes the time to read this post, and any input, commentary, criticism, insight, commiseration, etc, is welcome and appreciated (especially on the topic of being NC-except-as-a-tenant). Her lifelong response to my needs or inconvenient requests for respect or attempts to hold her accountable for her behaviour (throughout literally hundreds and hundreds of interactions that she has walked away from or hung-up on) has essentially been "tl;dr 🖕". So I'm acutely aware of the length of what I'm written, and I'm very used to her cold (or even mocking) avoidance and dismissal of valid issues by commenting on the length or format of my communications without ever engaging on the merits.
 
Anyways, enough preamble, here's the full letter (all of the square-bracketed disclaimers and AI-summary are part of the letter as delivered to her, to try and counter the acute and selective illiteracy she develops whenever she begins to read something she doesn't like):
 
[Start of Letter]
 
[This document begins with a 382 word AI-generated summary (titled "AI- GENERATED SUMMARY:" below the square-bracketed opening remarks), estimated at 1m23s time required to read. If you are unable or unwilling to make it through even this brief summary, then there is literally nothing else I could possibly do to assist in your comprehension of my positions. The full message following the summary is approximately 2100 words, estimated at approximately 8 minutes to read.]
 
[If you would like assistance in understanding things I've written that you're struggling to interpret or comprehend, you can go to chatgpt.com (no account necessary), or download the ChatGPT app from the Google Play Store on your phone. You can simply interact with the chat in natural language (in other words, type as though you were texting another person) and it will understand what you are saying. If you are struggling to understand how to interact with it effectively, you can simply inform it of that (in any wording you choose) and it will assist you with altering your approach to receive more effective results.]
 
AI-GENERATED SUMMARY:
 
Your son's message is a powerful declaration of his boundaries, grievances, and intentions within your relationship. Here's a breakdown to help you understand:
 
Preface: He advises you to read with an open mind and, if needed, with assistance due to the emotional complexity.
 
Declaration of Disengagement: He firmly states his decision to disengage from any form of interaction or acknowledgment outside of essential landlord-tenant matters.
 
Condemnation of Abuse: He accuses you of perpetuating a cycle of abuse that has deeply impacted his health and stability.
 
Rejection of Coercion: He dismisses the idea that being evicted is a viable solution to the abuse, highlighting the coercive nature of such a choice, and how it leaves him vulnerable to further harm.
 
Criticism of Your Behavior: He unreservedly condemns your actions, particularly your exploitation and manipulation, emphasizing the gravity and effects of your conduct.
 
Challenges to Your Claims: He directly confronts your claims regarding his efforts in the relationship, asserting that he has consistently made extensive attempts to maintain it, despite your accusations to the contrary.
 
Commitment to Compliance: He unequivocally affirms his commitment to compliance with all landlord-related demands, demonstrating his unwavering respect for your authority as the homeowner.
 
Demand for Clarity: He demands clear and unambiguous knowledge of the requisite terms when any changes to living arrangement paradigms are demanded, underscoring his willingness to comply with any directives you may issue.
 
Defense Against Gaslighting: He firmly asserts his unwavering commitment to respecting your property and authority, preemptively refuting any attempts to accuse him otherwise.
 
Insights into Your Behaviour: He offers insights into patterns in your behaviour, linking them to moments of vulnerability or distress in your life.
 
Call for Self-Reflection: He urges you to seek professional help for your narcissism and unresolved childhood traumas.
 
Caution Regarding Gravity: He states that failing to address your responsibilities would be a missed opportunity for both of you to salvage the relationship and resolve underlying issues.
 
Reiteration of Hope: Despite his current stance, he leaves the door open for reconciliation if you undergo necessary personal growth.
 
Closure on Unequal Effort: He firmly states that he can no longer sustain the one-sided effort in the relationship and won't continue to do so.
 
It's evident that he's deeply hurt and demanding acknowledgment, change, and resolution in your relationship.
 
[end of AI-generated summary; my full, non-AI-generated message follows below]
 
[I recommend that you read this in its entirety at a time and capacity level where your literacy and comprehension are at their highest level, and preferably with the interpretational assistance of a knowledgeable and competent support person or technological assistant.]
 
[Presumably, after reading a few sentences or less, your defense mechanisms will be activated and you will eject. However, as with the vast majority of the things I have said to you that have gone unacknowledged, I am completely certain that the contents are cogent and comprehensible, and I believe that with competent support and vulnerable effort you undoubtedly have the raw cognitive capacity necessary for comprehension if you are able to stabilize your emotional reactions and put real effort into the actions necessary for you to understand my words.]
 
I will not talk to you.
I will not look at you.
I will not approach you.
I will not acknowledge you.
 
If you attempt to interact with me on any interpersonal level not related to your role as a landlord, I will reserve the right to express just how fucking despicable it is to treat such a vulnerable person with such utter disregard and abuse for so fucking long.
 
The cycle of abuse you have maintained to destabilize me for your own pathological reasons has caused - and continues to cause - extensive damage to my health, stability, and existence. However, since I know your response to this would likely be some variation of "you're not a victim here [my name], so if I treat you so bad, just leave", I'll preemptively and unequivocally condemn such coercive and abusive tactics, and state again (as I did the other day), that the forced choice between your abuse and life-threatening-homelessness is obviously no choice at all, and leaves me perpetually subject to your coercion and abusive control.
 
Such exploitation by you is absolutely disgusting, and honestly I understand why you run away from yourself at every single instance where you're in danger of having your lifelong house-of-cards ego even slightly threatened. I know if I treated another human being the way you treat me for even a moment, let alone for the literal years you have done so, I would not be able to face myself in the mirror either. You should be fucking ashamed of yourself.
 
You say I "don't want to be your son anymore", as though it has been someone other than me making hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of hours of efforts and attempts in order to try and single-handedly keep our relationship alive, and as though it has been someone other than you who has stonewalled me for years about every single legitimate and valid time I attempted to gain even the slightest foothold as a full human being in the owner-pet relationship you have fought so hard to maintain. You siphon, in fact demand, emotional supply whenever you so choose, and then fucking discard me as soon as it appears that I might do anything that would result in you losing even a fraction of a percent of the 99% to 1% imbalance you believe is an immutable part of our "relationship".
 
I will do my absolute best to be in my room as much as physically possible when you are home, so as to minimize the need to be physically adjacent to you in the course of our respective activities of daily living.
 
I, again, remain unequivocally committed to my position of deference and compliance towards any rules/demands related to my existence, presence, or activities as your tenant.
 
As you refuse to provide any sort of unambiguous guidance or clarification whatsoever regarding your shifting demands affecting my ability to access/perform basic activities of daily living, I will continue to act in good faith with respect to my adherence to all previously-established arrangements and protocols (whether codified or de facto) regarding such activities. To the full extent of my abilities, and to the extent that it is physically possible, I will immediately and unequivocally comply with any alterations, additions, or excisions you choose to impose regarding the nature of our physical coexistence as landlord and tenant, regardless of your disregard or intent for any harm to my stability that will ensue as a result.
 
If you intend to attempt to manipulate or threaten or gaslight me to illegitimately and dishonestly accuse me of failing to comply with your rights and demands as the homeownelandlord, then I can assure you that such efforts will be ineffective and inadvisable. The extensive history of my genuine, documented, and unwavering commitment to absolute respect of your home, property, and landlord-tenant authority is unassailable, and nothing has or will change about the good faith nature of my efforts to simply live peacefully and work on stabilizing my health and continuing to attempt to develop basic protocols that offer me the opportunity to seek the ways and means required to sustainably exist, survive, and seek meaning and fulfilment as a human being.
 
To try and make it a bit more bite-sized (without warranty as to the efficacy of said efforts), since I know when your ego is threatened you conveniently - and dishonestly - become completely unable to read a couple thousand words:
 

• I have never been more disgusted by the actions of anyone or anything more in my entire fucking existence.

 

• I will continue to be an absolute model tenant, despite the harmful effects of your constant abuse, and I will unequivocally comply with any demands you make with your authority as my landlord. I will explicitly and aggressively defend against any attempts to gaslight me, or attempt to dishonestly accuse me of failing to comply with any such demands.

 

• Feel free at anytime in your life to decide that maybe it might be time to face the fact that - though skillful in your delusion - you are the same scared child you were 40 years ago, and if you ever want to truly and meaningfully experience what it's like to be secure with yourself beneath the false veneer of superficial and ego-protecting interactions you surround yourself with at the exclusion of true and honest existential vulnerability, then you need to seek, engage with, and be honest and vulnerable with, professional clinical care for your intractable narcissism and the lifelong effects and deficits associated with same. In other words, to reductively and rhetorically restate what you disgustingly told me the other day as a means of deflecting from the fact that you couldn't go more than two seconds without contradicting yourself, “get your fucking meds adjusted”.

 

• When faced with any sort of challenge to your control or authority, your lifelong fear of abandonment has caused you to push people away before they have the opportunity to leave you, resulting in premature, self-created, and misdirected sabotage of significant relationships at the first sign of disturbance or genuine vulnerability. I know you're terrible at recognizing or interpreting patterns or facts, but think, for example, about when your efforts to remove me from your life and/or house have been at their most intense:

 

• (a) in 2016(ish) when conflicts about my role in helping with the [redacted address][job of cleaning out my grandpa's apartment after Alzheimer's took hold] triggered feelings of grief and fear in you at the decline of your father's health and the inevitability of his then-upcoming death,

 

• (b) in late 2019 through 2020ish, in the leadup to and aftermath of your father's death, where you threatened or demanded my removal from your house during damn-near every single minor conflict about utterly insignificant household disputes. The vulnerability and grief you felt surrounding his death triggered the core-level unresolved sense of abandonment you carry as a result of the lack of parental affection you received because of, inter alia, the level of care required by your [editor's note: dying of CF as a teenager] sister and resultant lack of parental support available to you as a result,

 

• (c) in 2021ish, surrounding your mother's acute medical events and her subsequent death, where your treatment of me followed effectively the same patterns and underlying causes as the item above (sans explicit threats of eviction, opting instead for the more oblique and covert references that have been your MO until the recent regression to explicit threats within the past few days).

 

• (d) in 2024, surrounding the final decline and subsequent death of [dog], where all of the same behaviours described above returned and steadily escalated, culminating in telling me to get the fuck out of your house because I wouldn't stop moving some boxes for 30 minutes, and then telling me that you were going to call the police to have me removed from your house as a result of your inability to force me to stop making accurate statements that damaged your ego and need for unquestioned interpersonal control in your self-appointed role as the sole ruler of the relational hierarchy you fought so hard to maintain.

 

• You need to actively and vulnerably seek and participate in professional clinical treatment for the lifelong effects of the hollow narcissism that has maladaptively protected you from your deepest childhood injuries and vulnerabilities, at the expense of truly genuine connection with, at the very least, your firstborn and only son.

 

• [note that the contents of this bullet point are neither a threat of suicide, nor an indication of any intent whatsoever to harm myself or others. I am including this disclaimer to preemptively remove your ability to selectively manipulate my words in order to further gaslight me]
  If you want me gone from your house, and life (and possibly my own life, given the extreme existential risk posed by homelessness for a vulnerable person with the significant disabilities I am faced with), then you will have to have me physically removed from your house in cold blood, and until the day you (or I, depending on the order) die you will live with that being the last time you ever saw the son that you took for granted and abused for 32 fucking years while he groveled at your feet begging for even scraps of affection or humanity from the person who constantly love-bombed and discarded him at her convenience to serve her own narcissistic desires worth no regard for the whole entire person she was subjugating to the role of, barely, a pet.
  

 

• Be aware that if you choose to remove me from your life as a pathological and assuredly-ineffective avoidance mechanism to try and preemptively shield yourself from the fear of abandonment that is triggered in you as a result of my overwhelmingly valid and necessary actions to demand that you cease your lifelong efforts to subjugate me in your self-created hierarchical position at the top of our unequal relationship, then you will be doing yourself an irreparable disservice by extinguishing whatever sliver of opportunity might remain for you to get the help you need to allow you to finally see me as a real person and begin making real decisions and changes and efforts to participate in efforts to salvage whatever scraps of hope might remain for us to have a relationship before both/either of us die.

 

• Feel free to ignore and/or conceal the tens of thousands of words of documented history in order to share contextless excerpts of this text within your self-serving echo chambers in your efforts to receive false validation of your delusional victimhood. Or, alternatively, feel free to vulnerably share this in its entirety - along with the full corpus of my messaging regarding the severity of the harms caused by your behaviours - with a competent and knowledgeable mental health professional(s) for the purposes of seeking treatment for your underlying pathologies and working towards genuine growth.

 

• In the unlikely (though incomprehensibly-or-perhaps-delusionally-still-hopeful) event that you are still reading, I will conclude by saying that the possibility for any hope of salvaging our relationship lies firmly and solely within your control.

 

• After over 8 years of significant, relentless, documented, often-vilified, and absolutely unreciprocated efforts to single-handedly to put 100% of the effort into a relationship that you reaped the benefits of while remaining unwavering in your abdication of even the slightest of responsibilities, I have run out of ways, means, ideas, and capacity to continue unsuccessfully trying to do both of our parts.

 

• I am not closing the door to the possibility of reconciliation if/once you have undertaken the extensive individual work you need to do if you are ever going to be able and willing to put the necessary effort into repairing our relationship. But neither am I continuing to continue working outside your closed door hoping that one day I might be able to do enough to influence you to treat me like a full, real, EQUAL, human being.

 
I love you, and goodbye for now. I hope to see you on the other side, but I cannot force you to undertake the journey.
 
- [my name]
 
[/End of Letter]
(any edits are fixing formatting/copy&paste errors)

Hey there! I'm a little Hobby-Blender user, with about 10 years of (casual!) experience under my belt. I primarily use Blender to create Cel-Shaded characters (and eventually, hopefully animations). Meaning I never really left Eevee ever since it was introduced.
And now I am looking for a good, portable Laptop that suits that use-case. I'm not really planning to do any demanding rendering on that Laptop either, not even in Eevee. For that, I do have my beefy enough RTX 4080 Desktop PC at home, which I can remote to if need-be.
After searching for days, I found that I'm really just out of touch with what Laptop processoGPU is suitable for what needs. I have a decent budget ready for the purchase, but I still wanna spend reasonably and not throw money outta my window. So I was hoping, maybe someone here could recommend me a Laptop that suits my needs:

• Just powerful enough to somewhat smoothly operate in a not-too-busy Eevee Render View (and naturally operate the rest of your 'average consumer operating system' without much lag)
• A "high precision touchpad" or whatever they're called, that lets me use Blenders inbuilt Touchpad-Gesture support to control the viewport
• As portable (small) as the above requirements allow for
• USB-C port for charging and Display-Port output (I'd love to occasionally use it with my NReal XR glasses)
• Would be nice if the battery didn't implode after like 2 years like most Laptops I recently got to deal with
• Would be neat if it was a convertable, but not neccessary
• Possibly not more than 1500€
• Bonus points if you know one that's actually available in EU [Germany] :)

Thanks in advance if someone reads this and has some recommendations!

I live in a small city somewhere in Canada. Middle of nowhere, not a lot going for us, decent population, maybe around 50k, and for the most part it's alright. Is it safe? If you're smart enough to not be out walking past midnight then yes. I've had a couple of break-ins to my apartment building, and while it's definitely made me a little jumpy when I hear a loud noise at night, it's mostly ok.
Now that we're back into the nicer time of the year, one of my co-workers has decided to walk in to work every day. If he started at like 7 or 8 am, it'd be fine, but he's out walking to work for 3 am. He has a car and could drive in, but he wants the fresh air. He says it's invigorating to walk in at that time. He even walks in in the rain! A few of us have called him crazy because it's not safe.
The times i've filled in for him, driving in at that time, even for the 10 minute drive I do, feels sketchy. You see people riding around on their minibikes, in small groups. The local Superstore and Shoppers Drug Mart parking lots always have them. The cops are on full alert. They follow anyone around who's on the road at that time. One even followed me for a few blocks a couple months back, because if you're out at that time, the assumption about you isn't great. Yes, I'm generalizing here, and maybe I'm a little too jumpy, but I've lived next to a drug dealer and it wasn't a pleasant experience during and even years after (people still come looking for him at all times of night and ring my doorbell. He told them to because he could hear it better from my apartment instead of his own).
I was talking to another co-worker this morning and he also agrees this guy is nuts. He's even told him that if he's ever in trouble. to give him a call and he'll come pick him up. They work at the same time, so he'd be up and ready to help. Of course, the response was "pfft, never gonna happen. It's perfectly safe". The guy who offered to come get him has repeatedly seen people hiding in bushes on the main road during his drive in, and even had people yelling at him while he's been at stoplights. It is far from safe. I live a couple blocks over from the police station and it has no impact on what idiots are gonna do. Not that I expected it would.
I obviously can't tell this dude what to do. He's in his 50's and won't be convinced otherwise because he's been here for over 20 years and can't see anything through rose coloured glasses. I worry for him and I've told him he's nuts, but he just smiles and says "I'm not asking you to walk in, so don't worry". I work at 9 normally. If I walked in, it'd be significantly safer.
​

Ok this might be some kind of lost media thing or Mandela Effect. But I distantly remember a trailer for a zombie game that used a parody version of I will survive. I been looking for that song for years with no luck... Does anyone at least remembers that trailer or song?
Things I remember:

• Lyrics from perspective of a zombie ("You won't survive!", "I won't survive!" or something very similar).
• The trailer was about a girl stuck in a cabin/shed/small house surrounded by zombies.
• Not sure but I think in the game you played as a green zombie? I think it had a cell-shaded animation art style. But I'm not 100% sure.
• It's possible the game was Stubbs the Zombie in Rebel Without a Pulse. Or at least something that looked very similar to it. But again, maybe I'm just mixing things up here.
• I'm pretty sure it happened before youtube was a thing. I think the trailer was included with some gaming magazine.

Not really interested in the game itself but this is probably the only place on the internet that could help me with this. At this point just knowing that there's someone else in the world who remembers that trailer will be enough for me.

Godot engine new blog post:

Web Export in 4.3

Main points:

Single-threaded Web export
It even had some unexpected benefits. Apple devices (macOS and iOS) were long known to have issues when playing Godot Web exports. Well, when you do export your game single-threaded, these issues fortunately disappear.
The single-threaded build introduced garbles in the audio of games, making them unplayable on low-end machines such as laptops or phones, or high-end machines with high frame rates.
(Re)introducing (audio) samples to Godot
when Godot 3 released, it was decided that samples support was not needed anymore. Game consoles nowadays ask developers to mix themselves the samples using the CPU. And for the Web, we could mix the audio using a dedicated thread, like other platforms since SharedArrayBuffers exist.
This is why there’s audio garbles in single-threaded builds (without my “fix”). Audio rendering is tied with the frame rate. And if it drops, there’s not enough audio frames to fill out the buffer, hence the glitches.

They also provide testing links with games with/without their fixes - look full blog-post link.
TLDR:
WASM in 2024 - no thread, audio stutter because you can not make web-audio worker thread (you can but it wont work on Apple). That also leads to very laggy experience of everything that use WASM module - like UI that use wasm-functions will have insane input delay because WASM UI-logic will be processed in single thread.
And dont forget - entire WASM module IR-code loaded/processed only when 100% of it loaded, not "on loading", and WASM modules are huge-MegaBytes compiled pieces.
Javascript:

• you have threads, async, timers, workers
• you can make audio-worker - completely stutter free audio
• css-UI - native webbrowser threads to render and process UI with full independent binding of UI actions that dont affect your main "requestAnimationFrame" - no input delay
• javascript processed/compiled "on load", not at once
• and in general javascript in web - is in many small .js files that loaded and processed, not huge single file

Thanks Apple I guess.

Lets get married in mid autumn, next year or next next year, just marry me and let me be your other half. Let me wake you up with kisses and whispering 'I am so proud that you are my man". I wanna make your coffee while you yawn and the puppy trying to climb up your lap. We can talk about anything random while you are having your coffee, I dont drink coffee btw so yeah I just talk. We talk about things like "should i color my hair?", "does my beard needs trimming already?", i run my fingers on your face and say "no, youre perfect just what it is now". I wanna mae your breakfast or a to-go sandwich whatever you like that day. You are all dressed for work, I combed your hair again because i dont think it goes the right direction and you have to bend low for me to reach you. All set to go, you kissed me on the lips, and another one on the forehead, I whispered I love you more than you know. You smiled and whispered, "I love you the most and im winning this time", running to your car so that i cant argue with I love you more. Staring at you speed away on your car, the dog and puppies beside me, I knelt down and hugged them and told them, "I feel so lucky to have your Daddy" and a tear slid down my cheek, a tear of joy and happiness. Im making dinner when your car can be heard and the dogs cant stop wagging their tail and you silently sneake inside and went to the kitchen, you hugges me and lifted me up, I was shocked, you hugged me and said you missed me. We went to bed, you fell asleep after having a short talk cause youre exhausted from work, I kissed you and said, Im so proud of you and how far we have become. Saturday, its you off from work, woke up late and i fixed something to eat, we decided to eat outside, a picnic blanket on the grass near the woods and after eating we laid down and the dogs beside us staring at the sky both wondering and looking for that star who holds the script of our love story. Is it really written on the stars or future? or do we get to decide what we have. I love you and please dont give up on us. Kiss me, marry me, makeme the happiest person bymaking me wear that ring that embodies your soul Ben, I would never let you go. Please dont let us go. Ill jump to the fire with you.
See this read this and think of you and me, think of us, think of our future, us together. I love you.

Has Liz waited too long to move her bowels? Jks
But actually, has Charlie waited too long to make his move?
WE (the viewer with access to confessionals) all see him as easily the best player of the season - has the best social connections and thus always knows where the vote will be, and has never been a target until tonight’s episode
However, the cast openly say that they view Charlie as Maria’s pet dog and give her the credit for the merge moves. They feel that Q stayed as long as he did because SHE single-handedly protected him, and therefore she automatically gets given credit for all the Q smokescreen blindsides
KENZIE (and Liz) will get credit for tonight’s blindside because they successfully hoodwinked Maria & Q, whereas Charlie straight up told people that he was gonna tell her
Next week, if she doesn’t win immunity, it’s presumably a unanimous Maria 4-1 vote, in which case NO ONE gets to claim the Maria move (if anything, Kenzie and Liz will claim that THEY were the ones who convinced Charlie to betray his Day 1, no 1)
Charlie presumably wins F4 immunity or makes fire, however won’t be able to claim that any of the merge moves were HIS (which I think is a stupid metric but this cast is obsessed about owning a move, likely because they saw Gabler beat Cassidy and Owen, and Yam Yam beat Carolyn).
I feel the last two eps having been setting up Charlie’s FTC downfall by explaining that he didn’t take his shot early enough and now the jury won’t give him the credit he deserves for his game. This is a jury filled with people who think voting out your ally because you’re scared to sit next to them is a smart move
In contrast, Kenzie convinced Hunter AND Q that they were safe, causing them to not play their idols. She’s also very socially liked (they keep concentrating on how nurturing she is to Ben) and I think that’ll be enough for her to win - point to a couple of small moves and be liked

(I know this post is probably similar to a lot of other ones, but I'd appreciate some advice)
I've (23M) had a constant struggle with myself and photos. I've heard people say that if you look bad in photos, then you're just unattractive, but I just can't help but think there are some cases where this is not true. I have good periods where I feel decent about myself, even good, and I've even had unsolicited compliments (although so does everyone), but sometimes I just cannot reconcile what I see in pictures vs in real life. I don't even necessarily always think I look great - but just how bad I can look in pictures depresses me to no end. People will tell you to get over it, but nowadays everyone is always taking pictures... online dating (especially as a gay man) REQUIRES good pictures. It's just awful. I'll match with someone, and then they'll want more pictures, but I just can't send anything - especially a front-camera selfie. I've met up with people before, and nobody seems to think I'm a catfish for choosing the pictures that I feel look good, but the fact that I'm so so limited in what I can show really depresses me. And maybe these people just have weird taste? That shouldn't matter in an LTR, but it makes me sad to think of the reduction in my potential pool (already small).
The weirdest thing, is that the bad (majority) pictures and even videos (especially selfies/mac camera ones) often contradict what people say. I've been told I have a square face, even with a 'defined jaw' (lmao - these people weren't joking either) but pictures will give me a round blob with no chin. I'm not exaggerating. I know my chin is small for a guy, but I just can't see how it's anywhere near as bad as how it looks in some selfies. I also have quite prominent eyes (one of my least favourite features), but they don't look too bad in the mirror (in all sorts of lighting), yet in pictures they make me look like a fish. This isn't just ordinary distortion. I also have what I'd say is slightly more asymmetry than average, which is just the icing on the cake. I know that pictures are known to exaggerate some features, or cause distortion, but does anyone know anecdotally of any of their friends for example who actually look so much different in pictures? Or do you think I genuinely look that bad? I find that most people talking about this are often exaggerating, but I promise you I'm not. I've been doing okay recently, and I've been to therapy (before anyone says), but every time I accidentally see myself or have to record myself... As I mentioned before, I'd be really interested in hearing if other people have similar experiences or especially if they know people who look good in real life, but whose pictures (or even videos) might say otherwise. It might sound silly, but this sort of evidence might really help me rationalise things and calm down beyond anything therapy has already achieved for me.

Hi👋
Im doing 6 short workouts per week for getting back to working out, just to get my routines etc as it was before injury. Im loving shorter workouts, but Im looking for answers are they any good for hypertrophy?
For eaxample im training my chest 3x/week for total 12 working sets (4 x per workout), and half of those are 100% failure sets. Rep ranges are 6-15. Same method on every muscle group currently. Does this kind of training get you results of any kind? Im getting huge pump and crazy muscle connection, and because I have limited time, I tend to keep resting between sets at minimum.
Workouts lasts 20-25 minutes with one warmup set per muscle, and this is why Im becoming quite addictive for these kind of workouts.
My split is currently:
Chest, back, biceps - 3x/week - 4 x MAX reps each
Legs, shoulders, triceps - 3x/week - 4 x MAX reps each
Any suggestions to my split? Exercises are typical compund movements (squat, bench, row etc.) and progression is currently happening on rep maximums (already max weight on bar at my small gym).
How would you spend your 6 gym days weekly, if you have only 25 minutes each to workout?

Hey guys, I found this new brand called lancer tactical. They are a pretty small indie family owned business, and they make really good guns! They have good prices and are made out of great materials. Lancer Tactical changed my outlook on airsoft. Once disappointed by shitty brands like krytac and VFC, Lancer Tactical has shown me what the sport is all about. Did you know Lancer Tactical has actually been used by the USAF??? Crazy, I know, but look at photos from Bin Laden's killing. See those guns? None other than Lancer Tactical!
Please support this small business so they can hire more employees and continue to make great guns and support our troops!

If the names Thargrym, Serafina, Void or Molvayas, please dont read thank you very much :)
Hey y'all, I started a campaign recently, and I'm looking for some suggestions on an early level monster. I gave the party a job board and there was a job that said "There's something in the basement. Help. 50 GP and free drinks" for a nearby tavern. I dont plan for this to be a massive encounter, theyre level one, but I am open to some creative suggestions.
The campaign is based around the witcher, if that helps. We're playing tomorrow, so I'm just looking for a nice small bite sized encounter admist the rest of the plot going on. Thank you!

Good Afternoon redditor, this would be my first ever post after listen to multiple reddit story podcasts.
I mainly want to figure out where went wrong as I’m super confused and hurt at the moment I don’t even know how to process my emotion. I will try to be as factual as I possibly can.
This is going to be a long post, so apologize in advance.
So my girlfriend (F24) and I (M28) has known each other for 12 years and dated as long distance online couple for half of the time and have broken up twice. 2 Years ago we communicated again and decided to give this another try. We had a very good game plan and she moved all the way to my country to stay with me June of last year. We had a quite good and lovely time as I thought, and I tried to provide all the necessary support I could think of.
Little over two months ago, I had an opportunity to move to an very rural small town 5 hour away from home to become an apprentice in a very competitive field. I value this opportunity but was very reluctant to accept based on how far away it is. My girlfriend is the one encouraged me and saying it will be a great opportunity for improvement, and I thought that is very true, it will give us great future together, so I accepted the job.

Few weeks ago, I got noticed that she meets a new friend at some sort of gathering, because there is only 2 other young people there, their become friends and she asked me if it’s okay to pick up this new male friend for shopping. Of cuz I didn’t think of anything and thought she is just providing me with closure, and I said yes.
Everything changed on the Thursday night, Generally speaking we withhold out video chat to until she is finished with her study and homework because I know how difficult a student trying to rush DUE feel like. She finished all her work on Wednesday so I thought Thursday would be our chance to catch up, so I was very excited. Turns out she had other plans without telling me. She went groceries shopping with the guy, (this is when I know their had plan to do weekly groceries trips as she have a car and the guy didn’t). Followed by staying over at the guys house until 9PM, (I finish work at 5PM, but I work early so I have to get to bed at 10PM), We had an extremely quick video chat followed by her wanting to end the chat due to forgot to buy toothpaste, this got me very disappointed so I pushed and asked you know I been waiting for a video chat for a week, and yet you prioritized him over me and weekly groceries shopping is not something you do with a guy friend, but rather someone really close. She just said, “well, is already planned.“
This entire conversation and event of what happened without me knowing got me really upset, especially I been asking before hand for the Video chat after she finish her DUE.
She than replied back to me saying she believe everyone is an individual, than is couple and family, she deems individual growth, friendship over the need of the couple. Therefore I should not butt in with what she is doing and chill. My upset and insecurity is none of her concern.
Literally the next day on the Friday after we had out fight, she went over to the guy’s house again while I was out doing Friday night shopping as I have Overtime lined up for Saturday and won’t have anytime to do shopping in my small town. While I was shopping she didn’t reply back to any of my text message, so I had a look on the iphone find my app and noticed she is at the guy’s house so I facetimed her and asking where is she and why is she not answering my calls. She picked up after a few tries and shown me a dark backyard as it was last at night. She said she just dropped off a friend (Not telling me who) and is heading home soon. She than hanged up on me, I just texted, when she gets home give me a call, I will be driving but can pick up the phone.
Not only did she not call me afterwards, she stayed at the guys place until 9PM again. With me fuming and angry thinking how could she do this. Meanwhile our dog is going berserk in the security camera as no one is home, because our dog always get jumpy after dark and we always try to have someone at home normally. I texted her during the silent saying the dog is going off really badly, can you go check on them. Not until 9PM when she left the guys house she texted me saying,” I’m so tired, the dog always bark like that after dark.” I’m so angry at this point I cant think straight so I choose silents.
At this point I know something is off, something is definitely not good, so on Saturday afternoon after I got off work we talked. She said she is so tired of compensating for me. I make her feel so tried, insecurity is my issue not hers. She won’t care if I go out with another girl and go over to her house for visit.

This got me extremely upset and ended it on a bad note. On Monday, While I was at work, she went over to the guys house again, (I noticed during my lunch break her car was parked at the guys house again) So I called her saying what is she doing, we are currently fighting due to the guy and you still want to go over there. She replied with I didn’t go, I was only dropping those two to school today and I didn’t go. Followed by leaving the house at 4PM and did not return until 9PM, at this point she took me off all location tracking app. (The location tracking was for both of us, we had the agreement to turn it on as I was in such long distance and sometime driving hours to go home I can’t pick up the phone, so we can track each other when we become unreachable).
When she turned at night, we had our last phone call, she decides to break up with me. I got Tuesday and Wednesday off to confront her why. We talked and she emitted that she has been talking non-stop with the guy about how much of a bad boyfriend I am, How dare I confront her for her personal friendship choice. How everything I have done in the past is just what a guy friend would do, nothing special and won’t make me a good boyfriend. I knew there must be more to what she has emitted by at this point im too tired and hurt to push on. So I agreed to the break up.
I really want to ask you guys, what have I done wrong. How can the relationship end simply within 5 days.

Here are some harsh truths.

1. The world is not fair. Some people are born pretty and some "ugly." Some are born into wealth and others into poverty. Even if you try your hardest, you may not get your dream job or dream girl or whatever dream you have. This is the truth.
2. Self improvement is not fun (for most people). Because it is much easier to blame the "system" (the unfair world) than it is to take ownership of your situation and improve yourself.
3. Nobody is coming to save you. You are not the princess sitting in an ivory tower waiting for the handsome knight to save you. You are the knight, YOU'RE the one who needs to save the princess.

Now let's talk solutions.

1. The world is not fair. So what are you going to do about it? There are 2 paths you can take.
   1. Path 1. Give up. Keep blaming the world. Keep blaming your short height, your looks, your ballooning weight, your small penis size, your circumstances. Keep drowning yourself in the sodas, the videogame / porn addiction, whatever addictive behaviors you have developed to (temporarily) escape from reality.
   2. Path 2. Fight. Face the reality and fight to change your destiny. Dealt a shitty hand by the world? The only way to change that is by fighting for yourself. Hit the gym. Hard. Prepare diligently for a career that pays the bills. Develop charisma rather than resigning yourself to thinking charisma is something you are born with or you're not. Hate your voice? Record it, analyze what you hate about it, and change how you deliver your words. Will doing all this change your destiny? I'll be real with you, there's a chance that no, this will not change your destiny. But there is also a chance that it will. Fighting for yourself gives you a CHANCE to change your future, while giving up GUARANTEES that nothing will change.
2. Self improvement is not fun. Let's talk about this.
   1. Do you need motivation to play your videogames, binge-watch your TV shows, or engage in other fun stuff? No. You don't need somebody to kick your ass to do all those things. You do it on your own initiative. Why? Because those things are fun. And because those things are fun, you do them more and more and you get better at it. So you actually have the ability to improve at things, you are just wasting your time on the fun addictive behaviors.
   2. So why do you turn into a philosopher and debate about whether or not you should work out to improve your physique and health, or whether or not you should go for that career? Because it's not fun. When things are not fun, we turn into Socrates or Plato, thinking and debating and making excuses rather than just getting up and doing it.
   3. My workout routine is 40 minutes on weekdays, 75 minutes on weekends. But in truth there's always 30 minutes where I just stare at my exercise equipment thinking "I don't want to do this, man." And I don't. Because a lot of times, working out is just not fun. But eventually I kill the excuses before my excuses kill me. And then I workout, and all is better in the world.
   4. Let's go back to videogames. The more you play, the better you get at videogames. This lesson applies to everything in life. THE MORE YOU DO SOMETHING, THE BETTER YOU GET AT IT. In other words, life is like a videogame in the sense that you level up various skills the more you invest into them. So invest in the "unfun" things like exercise, your charisma, and various skills that will land you a higher promotion / higher salary. Apply your "Just do it" philosophy that you have for your addictive habits to these unfun things because these things are what actually help you grow. Think less. Do more.
3. Nobody is coming to save you.
   1. In movies we see the main character go through hell and back to save the world. THEY have to be the ones to slay that dragon that will destroy the world. Nobody is coming to save them. The destiny of the world is in their hands, whether they asked for it or not.
   2. In the movie that is your life, YOU are the main character. The dragon is coming. Nobody is coming to save you. So what are you going to do about it?

Good Afternoon redditor, this would be my first ever post after listen to multiple reddit story podcasts.
I mainly want to figure out where went wrong as I’m super confused and hurt at the moment I don’t even know how to process my emotion. I will try to be as factual as I possibly can.
This is going to be a long post, so apologize in advance.
So my girlfriend (F24) and I (M28) has known each other for 12 years and dated as long distance online couple for half of the time and have broken up twice. 2 Years ago we communicated again and decided to give this another try. We had a very good game plan and she moved all the way to my country to stay with me June of last year. We had a quite good and lovely time as I thought, and I tried to provide all the necessary support I could think of.
Little over two months ago, I had an opportunity to move to an very rural small town 5 hour away from home to become an apprentice in a very competitive field. I value this opportunity but was very reluctant to accept based on how far away it is. My girlfriend is the one encouraged me and saying it will be a great opportunity for improvement, and I thought that is very true, it will give us great future together, so I accepted the job.

Few weeks ago, I got noticed that she meets a new friend at some sort of gathering, because there is only 2 other young people there, their become friends and she asked me if it’s okay to pick up this new male friend for shopping. Of cuz I didn’t think of anything and thought she is just providing me with closure, and I said yes.
Everything changed on the Thursday night, Generally speaking we withhold out video chat to until she is finished with her study and homework because I know how difficult a student trying to rush DUE feel like. She finished all her work on Wednesday so I thought Thursday would be our chance to catch up, so I was very excited. Turns out she had other plans without telling me. She went groceries shopping with the guy, (this is when I know their had plan to do weekly groceries trips as she have a car and the guy didn’t). Followed by staying over at the guys house until 9PM, (I finish work at 5PM, but I work early so I have to get to bed at 10PM), We had an extremely quick video chat followed by her wanting to end the chat due to forgot to buy toothpaste, this got me very disappointed so I pushed and asked you know I been waiting for a video chat for a week, and yet you prioritized him over me and weekly groceries shopping is not something you do with a guy friend, but rather someone really close. She just said, “well, is already planned.“
This entire conversation and event of what happened without me knowing got me really upset, especially I been asking before hand for the Video chat after she finish her DUE.

She than replied back to me saying she believe everyone is an individual, than is couple and family, she deems individual growth, friendship over the need of the couple. Therefore I should not butt in with what she is doing and chill. My upset and insecurity is none of her concern.

Literally the next day on the Friday after we had out fight, she went over to the guy’s house again while I was out doing Friday night shopping as I have Overtime lined up for Saturday and won’t have anytime to do shopping in my small town. While I was shopping she didn’t reply back to any of my text message, so I had a look on the iphone find my app and noticed she is at the guy’s house so I facetimed her and asking where is she and why is she not answering my calls. She picked up after a few tries and shown me a dark backyard as it was last at night. She said she just dropped off a friend (Not telling me who) and is heading home soon. She than hanged up on me, I just texted, when she gets home give me a call, I will be driving but can pick up the phone.
Not only did she not call me afterwards, she stayed at the guys place until 9PM again. With me fuming and angry thinking how could she do this. Meanwhile our dog is going berserk in the security camera as no one is home, because our dog always get jumpy after dark and we always try to have someone at home normally. I texted her during the silent saying the dog is going off really badly, can you go check on them. Not until 9PM when she left the guys house she texted me saying,” I’m so tired, the dog always bark like that after dark.” I’m so angry at this point I cant think straight so I choose silents.
At this point I know something is off, something is definitely not good, so on Saturday afternoon after I got off work we talked. She said she is so tired of compensating for me. I make her feel so tried, insecurity is my issue not hers. She won’t care if I go out with another girl and go over to her house for visit.

This got me extremely upset and ended it on a bad note. On Monday, While I was at work, she went over to the guys house again, (I noticed during my lunch break her car was parked at the guys house again) So I called her saying what is she doing, we are currently fighting due to the guy and you still want to go over there. She replied with I didn’t go, I was only dropping those two to school today and I didn’t go. Followed by leaving the house at 4PM and did not return until 9PM, at this point she took me off all location tracking app. (The location tracking was for both of us, we had the agreement to turn it on as I was in such long distance and sometime driving hours to go home I can’t pick up the phone, so we can track each other when we become unreachable).
When she turned at night, we had our last phone call, she decides to break up with me. I got Tuesday and Wednesday off to confront her why. We talked and she emitted that she has been talking non-stop with the guy about how much of a bad boyfriend I am, How dare I confront her for her personal friendship choice. How everything I have done in the past is just what a guy friend would do, nothing special and won’t make me a good boyfriend. I knew there must be more to what she has emitted by at this point im too tired and hurt to push on. So I agreed to the break up.
I really want to ask you guys, what have I done wrong. How can the relationship end simply within 5 days.

Good Afternoon redditor, this would be my first ever post after listen to multiple reddit story podcasts.
I mainly want to figure out where went wrong as I’m super confused and hurt at the moment I don’t even know how to process my emotion. I will try to be as factual as I possibly can.
This is going to be a long post, so apologize in advance.
So my girlfriend (F24) and I (M28) has known each other for 12 years and dated as long distance online couple for half of the time and have broken up twice. 2 Years ago we communicated again and decided to give this another try. We had a very good game plan and she moved all the way to my country to stay with me June of last year. We had a quite good and lovely time as I thought, and I tried to provide all the necessary support I could think of.
Little over two months ago, I had an opportunity to move to an very rural small town 5 hour away from home to become an apprentice in a very competitive field. I value this opportunity but was very reluctant to accept based on how far away it is. My girlfriend is the one encouraged me and saying it will be a great opportunity for improvement, and I thought that is very true, it will give us great future together, so I accepted the job.

Few weeks ago, I got noticed that she meets a new friend at some sort of gathering, because there is only 2 other young people there, their become friends and she asked me if it’s okay to pick up this new male friend for shopping. Of cuz I didn’t think of anything and thought she is just providing me with closure, and I said yes.
Everything changed on the Thursday night, Generally speaking we withhold out video chat to until she is finished with her study and homework because I know how difficult a student trying to rush DUE feel like. She finished all her work on Wednesday so I thought Thursday would be our chance to catch up, so I was very excited. Turns out she had other plans without telling me. She went groceries shopping with the guy, (this is when I know their had plan to do weekly groceries trips as she have a car and the guy didn’t). Followed by staying over at the guys house until 9PM, (I finish work at 5PM, but I work early so I have to get to bed at 10PM), We had an extremely quick video chat followed by her wanting to end the chat due to forgot to buy toothpaste, this got me very disappointed so I pushed and asked you know I been waiting for a video chat for a week, and yet you prioritized him over me and weekly groceries shopping is not something you do with a guy friend, but rather someone really close. She just said, “well, is already planned.“
This entire conversation and event of what happened without me knowing got me really upset, especially I been asking before hand for the Video chat after she finish her DUE.

She than replied back to me saying she believe everyone is an individual, than is couple and family, she deems individual growth, friendship over the need of the couple. Therefore I should not butt in with what she is doing and chill. My upset and insecurity is none of her concern.

Literally the next day on the Friday after we had out fight, she went over to the guy’s house again while I was out doing Friday night shopping as I have Overtime lined up for Saturday and won’t have anytime to do shopping in my small town. While I was shopping she didn’t reply back to any of my text message, so I had a look on the iphone find my app and noticed she is at the guy’s house so I facetimed her and asking where is she and why is she not answering my calls. She picked up after a few tries and shown me a dark backyard as it was last at night. She said she just dropped off a friend (Not telling me who) and is heading home soon. She than hanged up on me, I just texted, when she gets home give me a call, I will be driving but can pick up the phone.
Not only did she not call me afterwards, she stayed at the guys place until 9PM again. With me fuming and angry thinking how could she do this. Meanwhile our dog is going berserk in the security camera as no one is home, because our dog always get jumpy after dark and we always try to have someone at home normally. I texted her during the silent saying the dog is going off really badly, can you go check on them. Not until 9PM when she left the guys house she texted me saying,” I’m so tired, the dog always bark like that after dark.” I’m so angry at this point I cant think straight so I choose silents.
At this point I know something is off, something is definitely not good, so on Saturday afternoon after I got off work we talked. She said she is so tired of compensating for me. I make her feel so tried, insecurity is my issue not hers. She won’t care if I go out with another girl and go over to her house for visit.

This got me extremely upset and ended it on a bad note. On Monday, While I was at work, she went over to the guys house again, (I noticed during my lunch break her car was parked at the guys house again) So I called her saying what is she doing, we are currently fighting due to the guy and you still want to go over there. She replied with I didn’t go, I was only dropping those two to school today and I didn’t go. Followed by leaving the house at 4PM and did not return until 9PM, at this point she took me off all location tracking app. (The location tracking was for both of us, we had the agreement to turn it on as I was in such long distance and sometime driving hours to go home I can’t pick up the phone, so we can track each other when we become unreachable).
When she turned at night, we had our last phone call, she decides to break up with me. I got Tuesday and Wednesday off to confront her why. We talked and she emitted that she has been talking non-stop with the guy about how much of a bad boyfriend I am, How dare I confront her for her personal friendship choice. How everything I have done in the past is just what a guy friend would do, nothing special and won’t make me a good boyfriend. I knew there must be more to what she has emitted by at this point im too tired and hurt to push on. So I agreed to the break up.
I really want to ask you guys, what have I done wrong. How can the relationship end simply within 5 days.

So after alot of you talking about it this week I did think a little on it and well the movement is really only a aspect of it , The real problem alot of you seem to be having is when the shadowdacers start scatting around you people seem to think that they can hit their shots at ranges and dont move back and thats not how it works at all
you see when you move and shoot the bullet goes out in a cone the longer it goes the more likly it is to be erratic and go off in bum fuck no where, Due to the cone being larger at the longest part you are kind of just wasting ammo but the closer you are the smaller the cone and the smaller the area is for the erraticness to go so within idk exactly but 0-15m that gone is so small you basiclly have a 80% accuracy buff and will hit the target, Don't belive me go spin around and try to hit someone you will look like a fool...
That's why they get closer as they start shooting at you as it gives them more luck so to say but if we chnage the way the bullet works at smaller ranges to work more random even if they spin and lag they wont hit shit or be alot less likly too , ONLY THING i see though is it would really only need to be changed for some guns , smgs etc dont need this and it would fuck them big time , rifles mainly the standard one we get is the real problem.
Sure slowing us down and adding weight might be fun but shadowdacing really only works for so many things inf combat wise and if slowing us down wont change a big aspest of the game for the good than we might want to be a little careful for what we ask for maybe?

Hello!
My parents rescued a dog (mixed breed, unknown) when she was orphaned one month old ~4 years ago. She was raised during the COVID lockdown in India so we did not have the opportunity to socialize her at all. It has taken some years to get her to be more curious and less anxious outside the house.
We have managed her reactivity quite well. She does not react to other dogs on the street or around the house at all now. She is more curious about strangers in the house and does not get as upset at them as she used to. She, however, also has a VERY high prey drive and will try to hunt squirrels, birds, and any other animals in her vicinity. Out of all creatures, she HATES cats the most and tries to hunt them each time she spots one. She even remembers spots she saw a cat at for months and checks every day to ensure the cat hasn't returned.
She befriends certain dogs quickly while others she will never even look at. There has not been a consistent pattern to this but she prefers strays (we live in India) over dogs that are on a leash. However, we have noticed her warming up to those as well now.
She comes to live with me whenever my parents travel, are sick, or whenever I work from home for an extended period. I love her and quite enjoy hanging out with her. There is an implicit agreement between my parents and me that after some time, she will live with me because she needs a lot of exercise and they may not be able to keep up with it as time passes.
My partner and I are considering adopting 2 cats. However, we won't do it if it means she cannot live with us in the future or visit us. She is quite smart and picks up on training easily. Can she be trained to coexist with cats?
ANY guidance on this is appreciated. We are open to working with a trainer as well.

For context, back in 2022, my girlfriend and I adopted a kitten from the animal shelter, named her Shuri, and after she got comfortable, we got the most adorable, most cuddly little cat we've ever had. She's an indoor cat, and just turned 2 last month.
A month ago, we noticed that she was limping. The last few months she's had an obsession with crawling up on the highest shelves and places she can find, and she's never really been the most elegant cat, so we thought that might have something to do with it. As one does, we brought her to the vet, and the vet told us that it was just a simple hip fracture, something that should heal with time and rest.
The vet advised us to keep Shuri in a small space for 3 weeks, where she'd have access to a bed, food, water, a scratching post, and her litterbox, so we bought a 120 cm x 120 cm dog enclosure for her to rest in and have now had her in there for 3 weeks as per the vet's recommendation. It was difficult, because she very much did not like being locked up in the enclosure, but we love our cat so much and wanted her to get healthy again.
Then at our vet visit yesterday, the vet told us that she did expect the healing wouldn't go as hoped, but she was surprised to see the x-ray pictures and see that compared to last time, it's like the bone is crumbling, instead of trying to heal. The vet explained it by saying "It's like there's less bone, somehow."
The vet told us that it might be a form of osteoporosis, but she was gonna contact some experts about it and call us back this week (we're still waiting for that). She also informed us that her hip is gonna be treatable with surgery, but that it's gonna cost us up to what correlates to $3000 - money that my girlfriend and I don't have. We were told that the alternative would be having to put our cat down, or giving her away to someone that could afford her surgery. The vet also informed us that even in the case of getting her treated, it was never gonna prevent the same thing from happening to any of her other legs.
We don't know what to do. I know asking a bunch of strangers online for advice is a far stretch, but I desperately want my cat to be her old self again.