Long story short, I’m 26 and the grandson is 34. I never thought about going for someone with that big of an age gap, but I’ve thought about how is just a number, especially when you approach your later 20s. And as I get older, 30 and 35 don’t seem as old as I thought they were. I’m not opposed to being introduced to someone that I know mutually through someone else, but here’s the tricky part of it: his grandmother is also my patient. And at first I didn’t think she was being serious, and so I kindly declined. But as the days went on, she continued to bring it up. And part of me didn’t see it as a big deal, but I don’t exactly have guys lining up for me. But I also took it as a compliment, that she holds me to such high regard, to want me to even meet her grandson. I’ve been told I don’t put myself out there, but is anyone ever perfectly okay with potentially making a fool of themself trying to meet someone organically? Anyway, back to the grandson….normally if it was neighbor trying to set me up with their grandson, I’d be less hesitant, but since it involves a patient’s family member, I feel like major ethical concerns come into play. But also idk if he’s even agreed to do it either. Because at first I said no, but now I feel like I’m shooting my shot but not taking her up on her offer. And call me crazy, but what if I’m stepping in the way of meeting my dare you say…soulmate? Because this grandma (love her dearly, I’m actually quite close with her) is 94, so she knows a thing or two, especially with how well she knows her grandson. And she said I’m just his type. And I know she talks about both of us to one another, she’s literally trying to set us up. And like I said, I’m not sure if he agreed to meeting me. But through all the thoughts I’ve had, I keep coming back to how hard it is to meet someone nowadays, and how sometimes being set up actually works out. My parents started dating by my mom asking a mutual friend of her’s and my dad, if he wanted to go to a party with her. He agreed and after that party, they started dating. So they were age 16 and they’re 59 now, so you do the math. In the few weeks of this going on, the times he’s been visiting her, I’m always busy at that same time with other patients, so we end up missing each other. And I hope she didn’t tell him that I’m hiding, because I’m literally not hiding…except one time when I could hear her calling out about me from down the hall “there she is!”. I felt so awkward being singled out like that, I literally walked into a random room, not thinking they would be coming down the hall and passing me in the room. FML. And as they passed by the room, she shouted “there she is!” again FML 😭 I’m also not trying to come off desperate if I agree to meet him, but what if he wasn’t even on board to begin with. And then I just look Iike fool who agreed to meet him, even though I’m caring for his grandmother. Is that cringe? Men: what should I do? Would you agree if you were the grandson? Women: feel free to chime in as well.

Long story short, I’m 26 and the grandson is 34. I never thought about going for someone with that big of an age gap, but I’ve thought about how is just a number, especially when you approach your later 20s. And as I get older, 30 and 35 don’t seem as old as I thought they were. I’m not opposed to being introduced to someone that I know mutually through someone else, but here’s the tricky part of it: his grandmother is also my patient. And at first I didn’t think she was being serious, and so I kindly declined. But as the days went on, she continued to bring it up. And part of me didn’t see it as a big deal, but I don’t exactly have guys lining up for me. But I also took it as a compliment, that she holds me to such high regard, to want me to even meet her grandson. I’ve been told I don’t put myself out there, but is anyone ever perfectly okay with potentially making a fool of themself trying to meet someone organically? Anyway, back to the grandson….normally if it was neighbor trying to set me up with their grandson, I’d be less hesitant, but since it involves a patient’s family member, I feel like major ethical concerns come into play. But also idk if he’s even agreed to do it either. Because at first I said no, but now I feel like I’m shooting my shot but not taking her up on her offer. And call me crazy, but what if I’m stepping in the way of meeting my dare you say…soulmate? Because this grandma (love her dearly, I’m actually quite close with her) is 94, so she knows a thing or two, especially with how well she knows her grandson. And she said I’m just his type. And I know she talks about both of us to one another, she’s literally trying to set us up. And like I said, I’m not sure if he agreed to meeting me. But through all the thoughts I’ve had, I keep coming back to how hard it is to meet someone nowadays, and how sometimes being set up actually works out. My parents started dating by my mom asking a mutual friend of her’s and my dad, if he wanted to go to a party with her. He agreed and after that party, they started dating. So they were age 16 and they’re 59 now, so you do the math. In the few weeks of this going on, the times he’s been visiting her, I’m always busy at that same time with other patients, so we end up missing each other. And I hope she didn’t tell him that I’m hiding, because I’m literally not hiding…except one time when I could hear her calling out about me from down the hall “there she is!”. I felt so awkward being singled out like that, I literally walked into a random room, not thinking they would be coming down the hall and passing me in the room. FML. And as they passed by the room, she shouted “there she is!” again FML 😭 I’m also not trying to come off desperate if I agree to meet him, but what if he wasn’t even on board to begin with. And then I just look Iike fool who agreed to meet him, even though I’m caring for his grandmother. Is that cringe? Men: what should I do? Would you agree if you were the grandson? Women are free to chime in as well.

Hello all. I’m new to Reddit - I’ll probably post a version of this across the personal finance/FIRE UK/entrepreneurship channels. Apologies in advance for the long post but it’s all connected for me!
I am a dual UK/US citizen and I moved to the UK (London) two years ago after completing my masters degree in the US, and have been struggling financially since. I’m 30, single, and am unable to save or make any meaningful investment contributions, or make any significant dent in my loans debt.
Im making £37,000 a year as a landscape architect (I’m still shocked at the low salaries here). My colleagues in the US with my experience level make around $70K (more or less, depending on the city)
I’m $60K in debt from the student loans I took out for my masters. While I don’t regret pursuing higher education, I’m not convinced that the investment was worth it for this field, and I’m considering leaving the field anyway because I’m not really enjoying it (nor can it support me financially in London). So in addition to the financial stress I’m also questioning my career goals and interests. I’ve also got a few thousand on credit cards as I need to put a lot of my expenses on cc because I don’t have the cash. I do also travel a lot for pleasure/holiday and recognise some of my cc debt is due to travelling - but I have to have some fun too! I have about $50K in a US account from a previous jobs retirement fund and an inheritance from a grandparent that is invested in some etfs in the US.
I’m limited with the salary I can make within this field (landscape design, planning). Changing jobs or asking for raise will only get me a couple thousand more (unless of course I move back to the US). So I’m starting to explore other options - particularly entrepreneurship and business. I’ve always had a gut feeling that I want to work for myself, although having my own garden design or landscape architecture firm (I.e offering design services) doesn’t feel aligned either. I feel so stuck with what direction to go, finding the energy and time while I work full time, and feeling mentally drained and stressed that with each day that goes by I’m both not doing work I love and I also not able to live the life I want financially or set myself up for the future.
I would really love to become financially independent, while also be working on something that is meaningful and contributing. I love nature, plants, design, yoga, cooking, health and well-being, animals, and art - I feel that my interests don’t tend to align with high earning (I.e tech, finance, etc) I’d love to be able to pay off my debt, not live paycheck to paycheck, treat those I love, own my own home, and spend guilt free, but it seems a long way away. Id love to “retire early” as well but I’m also realistic with how far I am behind and how little I have saved/invested in relation to my debt and salary.
The taxes situation regarding investing etc between the US and UK is enough to make me want to just move back to the US as well. If anyones got it all figured out and is open to providing a UK/US taxes 101 - especially as it relates to working towards FIRE - I would be forever grateful!
So to wrap up - I’m looking for advice on any of these topics: Salaries and finances in the UK (London) FIRE in the UK as a a dual US/UK citizen Career alignment Entrepreneurship and business
Thanks to anyone who read this all the way through!

Everyone involved in this story is between 25 - 30 and living in different countries.
Me and a close friend lets call her Megan made this a clan with the aim to play on a high skill level. The clan has been around for 5 or so years and we managed to reach a professional level. We were also close with the group of people that joined over the years and even met them multiple times irl.
Over time naturally people would leave and new people join, but a year or so ago the friend I started the journey with retired. It was only me left to manage the clan. Even tho we managed to move on it just isn't what it once was. From our original first group barely anyone is left. We are about to lose our professional status and if I'm being honest Im burned out too.
Now with all that I decided to retire aswell and with that close the clan. We are around 40 players currently with maybe 20 being "active" (at least online sometimes). Here starts the drama.
A hand full of the active players are saying I should have just given the clan to one of them, while yes it is just some clan it still has a history and image, the name has a status and I feel like I owe it to everyone that was in on the journey to close the clan on a high note.
There is also a wedding in a few months, 2 of our clan members are getting married, they invited around 7 of our online group and they just so happen to be part of the hand full of people that wanted to continue the clan.
One of them lets call her Jenny joined us a year ago, her soon to be husband Kenny was with us for a year, then left for half a year or so and rejoined when Jenny joined us.
From their POV I "risked" ruining their wedding and should have just let them have the clan or dragged it out 2 more months. But I already know that they realistically dont have the time (or standards) to keep the clan as is. Jenny is working all day and has maybe 3~ free hours per day, which she has to spend with wedding preparations too. Kenny is never hanging around with the clan and not really adding much to the community. We maybe see him every few days when Jenny, him and one more person, Alex, play a different game.
Right after I let them know of my decision, I have been disinvited from the wedding and got a whole bunch of accusations thrown at me, that our friendship was always onesided, that I never did anything for them, that I have failed as a friend, that I didnt care about them.
I know that this was a selfish decision but every decision I made on this journey was for the "greater good" of the clan, even when I continued after Megan quit.
Everyonelse, even if they disagreed with my decision, were polite with me still. Almost all of the longterm clan members agree with my decision.
AITA for closing the clan?

People who are now in their 60s to 80s and up still grew up in an analog world.
Younger millennials and Gen Z grew up with video games, internet, and social media. Older millennials grew up in the transition period.
I've read somewhere that the average US male gamer is 35 and the average female gamer is even older at 44 years old!!
I'm in my late 20s, and I grew up in a household where my parents considered video games to be 'for kids', but the stats say otherwise.
I'm wondering if it's a generational thing, and if in 20-30 years time, it'll be common to see playstations and gaming rigs in retirement homes lol.

​
https://preview.redd.it/5jawxd9i3r0d1.png?width=780&format=png&auto=webp&s=cc6a202627d021b49d791ae1cc026f2c91703649
AWS application integration empowers seamless connections between decoupled components within microservices, distributed systems, and serverless applications. Communication can occur directly via well-defined point-to-point APIs or asynchronously through message queues (SQS) or event-driven triggers (EventBridge).
Core AWS services like Amazon Simple Notification Service (SNS) and API Gateway facilitate these interactions. The integration process typically involves analyzing the applications, designing the integrated system’s architecture, and finally, implementing and rigorously testing the connection. This collaborative effort often requires a project manager, business analyst, AWS solution architect, developers, QA engineers, and a DevOps engineer.

Benefits of application integration

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This results in faster and more efficient application development, allowing you to innovate and adapt with agility.
2. Shift operational focus
AWS application integration services take over operational burdens, empowering your IT team to focus on strategic initiatives. Here’s what you gain:

• Automatic scaling: Forget about time-consuming server provisioning, patching, and management. AWS scales automatically based on demand.
• Focus on high-level tasks: Free your IT team’s valuable time from mundane tasks. Let them focus on strategic initiatives and innovation.

This shift allows you to maximize your IT resources and unlock greater strategic value.
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Application integration fosters component independence, safeguarding your applications from technical failures or resource spikes:

• Decoupled applications: Maintain interoperability while ensuring your applications operate independently.
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This resilience translates to a more robust and reliable application ecosystem.
4. Powerful messaging
Effective communication is the cornerstone of successful application integration. AWS delivers with a suite of powerful messaging tools:

• Unmatched throughput: Don’t worry about message traffic limitations. AWS handles high volumes effortlessly.
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With AWS, you can message with confidence, ensuring your applications stay in sync and operate seamlessly.
By leveraging these key benefits of AWS application integration, you can create a streamlined and efficient workflow, empowering your applications to work together flawlessly. This translates to a more agile, resilient, and ultimately, successful business environment.
​
https://preview.redd.it/97cbaxpn3r0d1.png?width=600&format=png&auto=webp&s=366a39aff470dc2c9f41618913126d19453cb903

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Steps for application integration on AWS

The specific timeline of an AWS integration project varies depending on complexity, chosen approach, and existing environment. Here’s a typical process breakdown:
1. Analysis (1-3 weeks):

• Describe application architecture and constraints.
• Estimate investment and value of integration.
• Define success metrics (e.g., faster processing, fewer errors).

2. Design (1-3 weeks):

• Identify and map available APIs.
• Map business workflows and identify integration points.
• Design the integrated system architecture:
  • Data flow mapping between applications.
  • Data transformation planning (if required).
  • Data security planning (location, transmission).
  • Define performance requirements.
• Choose integration approach and AWS services.
• Plan a pilot project (optional).
• Plan code adjustments (optional, may take 2-3 months).

3. Implementation & testing (variable duration):

• Implement code changes in applications.
• Connect applications using chosen approach:
  • Option 1: Point-to-point API communication (API Gateway, AppSync, AppFlow)
    • Design and publish APIs.
    • Prepare API documentation.
    • Configure integration settings.
  • Option 2: Message/event-based communication (SNS, SQS, MQ, EventBridge, MSK, Kinesis)
    • Select or build adapters for communication.
    • Define message/event routing and modification rules.
  • Option 3: Building workflows (Step Functions)
    • Sequence applications and services using drag-and-drop interface.
    • Set up logs/events for performance monitoring.

4. Test the integration:

• Uni-, bi-, and asynchronous queries for data consistency.
• Failover and recovery mechanisms.
• Performance, scalability, and security of the solution.

The top AWS integration services for a streamlined workflow

While AWS offers a vast array of application integration services, here’s a breakdown of some of the most powerful and popular choices to streamline your workflow:

1. Amazon SNS

Amazon Simple Notification Service (SNS) excels at creating and integrating loosely coupled and distributed applications. It simplifies managing and sending notifications from the cloud through various delivery options, including:

• Event notification
• Application monitoring
• Workflow system management
• Time-sensitive updates

Virtually any application that generates or consumes notifications can leverage SNS. Its flexible message delivery system utilizes multiple transport protocols for reliability. Plus, with pay-as-you-go pricing, you only pay for the resources you use.

2. Amazon SQS

Amazon Simple Queue Service (SQS) empowers companies to send, store, and receive messages between software components. It acts as a temporary buffer for messages awaiting processing, decoupling applications for increased elasticity. Here’s how SQS benefits your workflow:

• Decoupling: Applications are free to operate independently, enhancing scalability.
• Pull-based delivery: Unlike SNS (push-based), SQS allows applications to control the flow of messages, promoting high-performance processing.
• High-volume messaging: SQS effortlessly handles massive quantities of messages, ensuring your applications can operate at peak performance.

3. Amazon SWF

Amazon Simple Workflow Service (SWF) allows businesses to seamlessly coordinate work across distributed systems. It’s ideal for processing background jobs with sequential or parallel steps, acting as a:

• Task coordinator: SWF orchestrates the execution of workflows, ensuring tasks are completed in the correct order.
• State tracker: It meticulously tracks the processing state of each workflow, providing complete visibility.
• Failure management: SWF gracefully handles task failures, allowing for automatic retry or recovery.

This makes SWF ideal for building asynchronous, distributed systems where complex workflows need to be managed, such as order fulfillment or procedural requests.

4. AWS Step Functions

AWS Step Functions provides a serverless way to sequence AWS services within your business-critical applications. It helps coordinate and organize distributed systems as a series of well-defined steps. With a visual editor, Step Functions simplifies workflow creation and execution, offering:

• Visual workflow building: The user-friendly interface allows you to build and run service sequences visually, streamlining development.
• Scalability and reliability: Step Functions ensures your business-critical workflows are reliable and scale effortlessly.

Application integration on AWS architecture designed by Softweb

This architecture empowers seamless connections between the applications, leveraging the power of AWS services. Designed for security, scalability, and efficiency, it fosters a robust and adaptable foundation for the business ecosystem.
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https://preview.redd.it/rctp3d3s3r0d1.png?width=781&format=png&auto=webp&s=c14ad0ac80b5b5d872a729f5586ab2f9999e912e

Leverage AWS integration services for faster application development

AWS application integration helps businesses achieve more with their salient IT resources. If you’re looking to learn more AWS and its capabilities, you can hire our certified AWS experts to help you with your needs. Get in touch with us to start your project.
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Originally published at softwebsolutions.com on April 10, 2024.

I feel quite flat today. I feel okay and all, I just feel empty but not sad empty but empty as in I have nothing to give today.
I’m taking a step back in some areas with work. I came to the realisation today that my doing work I shouldn’t have to/is not my responsibility means that the issue of it not being done isn’t being exposed. I’ve communicated several times to my manager that what should be happening isn’t and nothing has changed, so I figure it I step back from it then she’ll see it not being done/she’ll hear about it from others. I like that I’m a team player blah blah blah, I always support and encourage my colleagues and take on more so they can focus on their goals and things and I just need to stop. I can still do it, and I know wi will regardless because I can’t not, but I need to be selfish. My manager herself said I needed to learn to be selfish - ironic isn’t it, given how much it a selfish self absorbed cow I am outside of work. Anyway I’m letting it pile up now. I’ve communicated plenty, I’ve offered solutions, I’ve even set up a bloody chat for the team taking over if they have any questions and I can help them. If they opt to not do their work then it shouldn’t fall on me, so therefore I’m stepping back.
I feel like I don’t have any real control over myself lately. Like I tell myself to do something and I don’t do it and I can’t seem to make myself do anything. I have zero discipline. I need to learn to have much stronger discipline. I’ve also had the worst cravings again lately, I guess I’ve shown some discipline in that but I’m still not eating properly - I need to be cooking proper meals, not instant rice and veggies and stuff. I feel like utter crap when I don’t eat properly, and that doesn’t mean eating junk food stuff it also means not eating an adequate amount of protein and things. I need to get myself together. I just haven’t had the drive to do anything lately.
I’ve been using my K18 mask each wash, as it says I should, I don’t condition and then I put it into my damp hair and maybe my hair feels healthier I guess but I hate how it air-dries. It’s so blahhh. Normally when I air dry it’s fairly silky in the morning, not silky silky as it would be when I properly style it or use a mask etc but it’s nice enough. Whereas now it’s all… idk. It feels a lot thicker lately, idk why as it won’t be, but I can’t fit it all into a claw clip anymore like I could before. I wonder if it’s more to do with my layers growing out? It’s also longer. So probably those two things. It’s still going through a shedding phase, the post stress kind of shedding I get. I hate it. I hate that my inability to control my emotions means I get such physical side effects. Anyway. I’m welllll overdue for a haircut, but I feel like I want to get it all to one length and then go, because I feel like she keeps f’ing up my length. So idk. It’s so ugly at the moment though, it’s due for a colour and desperately needs some shaping done. Maybe this time I will go to a new salon and then I always have my usual one to fall back on? Idk. I won’t get a cut for at least another month I don’t think. Maybe. I need it but I want it all one length so it can be properly restyled. So idk, I guess I’ll get bigger clips. My face framies need some TLC big time though. Oh well. What’s some bad hair when I’m so ugly anyway. Plus getting my hair done means I have to stare at myself in a mirror for 2 hours, I can barely even look at myself when putting makeup/skincare on.
I did a workout today and it was so bad. I truly have nothing to give today. I ended up just doing a super basic pilates routine which tbh was more stretching than anything. It felt nice though, so I’m glad I did it. So in short I did not do a workout today, and I shouldn’t have said that.
I wonder what it will be like to not hate myself? It feels like an unreachable goal but it’s my goal nonetheless. But I wonder what it’s like? It sounds so freeing. The way Andy says he doesn’t really think negatively about himself, that he doesn’t relentlessly beat himself up over things and idk, he said more but anyway. I know that won’t always be the case and he’ll sometimes feel completely different and negatively and things, which I detest the idea of, but on the whole he’s content with himself. The idea of that feels so foreign. I don’t know where it came from, I mean I do - a lifetime of collecting insecurities, fears and all of that. But I realise I haven’t had a life where I’ve been constantly rejected or had any issue getting attention from men (who were clearly daft and blind), I have parents who in theory seem to love me (out of obligation), I don’t have a difficult life and I have plenty of opportunities thrown at me etc etc. I I guess I have been treated badly by people close to me, people I’ve forced myself to trust and be open with, and I have always been sensitive and idk. So I guess I took on those situations and words and they stuck and then proceeded to fester. But I hated myself before then too… though I hated myself less before then I suppose. But I didn’t feel worthy of anything much back then and I didn’t like myself at all. I can’t actually remember a time where I felt accepting of myself, I don’t mean a time where I liked myself, I mean just a time where I felt content enough. I remember being in primary school and wishing on dandelions that I could be anyone else as long as I wasn’t me. I remember it, I think it was in my grandmas garden and idk. Anyway. I still make wishes on dandelions even now, though a lot more privately. But so I can’t remember a time I felt okay about myself, and over the years it’s just slowly but surely become a twisted, monstrous hatred for myself, where I fantasise about ripping my skin off and hacking away at myself and tell myself horrid nasty things throughout the day, every day. It sometimes feels lightened thanks to therapy, the hatred hasn’t really lessened but my ability to recognise the negativity has increased and so I don’t lean into the negativity as easily now, but I still do on a daily basis. I just don’t even know what it would be like to accept myself. I hope I get to that point some day, I really hope it’s soon. Even if it just means I’m in a state of delusion.
I wish downstairs wouldn’t slam their goddamn door all the time, it’s like they’re incapable of closing it normally. And then they thunder around so heavy footed - like how is it that the people DOWNSTAIRS makes UPSTAIRS shake with footsteps and things. Anyway it’s fine and not really an issue, but it annoys me sometimes. Like why do they walk so heavy!!! WALK LIGHTER.
I don’t want to journal anymore. Im going to read. He’s still asleep so I’m not really sure if we’ll spend time together or not tonight. Okay anyway bye

Im going to rant about my emotionally and verbally abusive dad

I’m starting to hate my dad, the way he behaves, the way he talks, the way he thinks, basically everything. He’s an oil and gas company employee and earns 100% income of my family, which means he doesn’t spend a lot of time at home. I'm 18F, and the time he spends in my life can basically be cut to half, because he only comes home for two weeks and works for two weeks every month, for as long as I can remember.

He’ll always get triggered by the smallest things ever and starts to verbally abuse my mum or everyone in this family because he thinks he’s the financial source of this family and he can do whatever he wants for the sake of being a provider of this family. Yes, he financially supported us for about 20 years now, and I’m truly grateful for it, but the role of being a dad is definitely more than that, right? Plus, he only gives about 25% of his income to my mum and expects her to take care of four people’s spending every month and be a homemaker.

Here are the little things I’m gonna share with you that he’ll get triggered by. Whenever my mom was the driver he would be in the passenger seat yapping about how my mum’s driving skills were bad and belittling her. I hate to see that. He’s a misogynistic person, since I could remember he’ll always say a lot of things about women like he wasn’t raised by one. My grandmother is evil towards my mum, she’ll always try to gossip about my mum in front of my dad and makes my dad mad at my mum. My mum raised three of us, me, my brother and my sister because he’s barely home. Whenever he comes back from work, he’ll just meet up with his friends and drink till late at night and come home drunk. Or he’ll just go on bike trips with his friends for a few nights every week.

One time my mum was sick and overslept and missed my little sister's school time she straight up yelled at my mum for being irresponsible and he even said “You must send her to school every day unless you die.” It was shocking and awful, I would say I was already used to his tantrums but this is new and it's very out of line. My mum must felt so hurt at that time.

I never talk back to him. I never talked back to him since I was a kid, never, cuz whenever I had a little objection to his opinion I would get yelled at, very badly.

He always thinks he has the right to say all those bad things about us because he’s my mum’s husband and our dad. My dad would always start a fight with my mum about money. He thinks we’ve spent so much of his money and always being ungrateful to him which we did not. And the fight he had with my mum would always end with “You don’t know how many women are aiming at my money, I can still pull girls and choose not to stay here with you.” My mum will always be quiet about it because it’s the only way he will stop yelling.

His insecurity of fearing no one will take care of him when he gets older is getting really obvious now as he’s older. He’s unwilling to pay for our expenses and decided to cut off 5% of the money from the 25% he was initially giving us. I guess he’s trying to save up for his retirement but as his children, we did not say we would abandon him. Sometimes they will also fight about why me and my siblings rarely start a conversation with him and accuse my mum that she’s turning his kids against him. This is the most ridiculous shit I’ve ever heard of, I genuinely don’t know what he’s thinking. Btw he barely pays any attention to us, he only cares about his money and his bike.

Here's a little fun fact about him, he likes to brag. Whenever he gets anything that is “braggable” he will start to brag, and show off to the other relatives and friends, making others think that he’s a super generous person and he’s being very generous towards us, but the truth is, he’s not.

Whenever they fought, he’d say awful, hurtful stuff, and yell at my mom and they would stay quiet for a few days until they started talking again. Then things go back to normal and we live peacefully like a normal family and things will repeat.

I really wish that one day I could drag my mum out of this shithole. Maybe we are the problem too, we are too dependent on his financial support. I just needed to let things out for a sec so that I could focus on my study, cuz I don't really know what to do now.

thanks for reading my rant

Indrajaal successfully demonstrates the curtain of the misconception which is created by the Indian God Indra. The miracle of the net enables taming of the creatures and amassing the power to enslave and command other living beings by bending their minds. In the ancient India, Vashikaran was the great technique that used to be the ruler’s and suitor’s invincible tool for gaining power over another person along with the help of the mystical ways. Sur Indrajaal Vashikaran includes the mind, emotion, relationship, and magical event manifestation through the using of mystical or supernatural powers.
Indrajaal Vashikaran
Origins and History
Indrajaal Vashikaran is believed to have been born in the Indian lands from the very ancient times. When the wandering sages and saints invented rituals, sorcery, black magic and charms, they intended to gain mastery over the happenings and people. Also, the Hindu holy books and texts as well as the ancient western spiritual traditions present such references as to mind control techniques. Through generations, the masters of the hidden vashikaran, handed down the techniques that were based on oral communication which was guarded day and night until today.
Back in the medieval ages, kings and rulers wanted to be the magical masters to do yog sadhanas and control their enemies. Myths describe us of their special rituals which are reserved for powerful witches of their tribe used dolls, artifacts, gems and herbs. Kath Bahador was even a court astrologer of the emperors of the Mughal dynasty, who was full of magic and mysticism that was used to gain access to their superiors.
Not only the smart people could communicate with the spirits using such spells. And outside the professional level, people too experimented: for instance, to repair their love, relationships, riches, and success, they used vashikaran. The last variable we can mention is the esoteric science of Indrajaal Vashikaran which is the most used science in Indian subcontinent.
How It Works?
Indrajaal Vashikaran is based on the idea that there is a cosmic energy that binds everything in this universe together. Through meditating one could achieve this by unconsciously concentrating all one's spiritual power without following any specific types of poojaas, havans, rituals or the meanings of the mantras and other objects to the desired person.
And so, one can assert that social interaction is not merely about picking up someone's belongings such as hair, nails, or clothes but it also involves an act of ritual in which the energy linkage is believed to be formed. Not only the services of phantom chants, yantras, crystals or photographs but also they play an amazing role in this process. I through equal parts of devoted belief, visualizing images vividly, and praying to either gods or their opposites, the process of shrinking the will of the other person begins.
The Practitioners
There are people who are born to be good practicing black magic in some parts of the country and are known to be Vashikaran specialists. They are known as masters of the mental manipulations. Many let the word vashikaran be associated with them and others take baba, guru and magicians as conjurers and shoddy magicians. Apart from them different assemblies and love spells employ the same methods such as tying lemons, chilies, using ashes and so on.
When it is about the extraordinary means to make a living and the turning points of one's career, one may need to be informed with something specific and personal only. These tantriks are the invisible asset in the policy of the conspiring politicians during elections in favor of their desirable candidates to produce a satisfactory result. Altogether, there are ornaments that have privacy related to gemstones, rudrakshas, money, wealth, and relationships.
In this area there exists the misgivings of frauds and cheats where a person promises something that never happens. To have entanglement with a good person right from the beginning is vital if you are going to look for a vashikaran specialist.
Controversies Around It
In spite of the fact that astrology has been practiced for many years, this conflict remains an issue whose point of contention is just as valid as always. The argument put forth by her opponents is that it is unethical magic, which is manipulative and is performed against the person who has no free will.
Furthermore, the instances of people being financially abused to think that vashikaran is a technique which can be used to control others are now many. The lady is involved unfairly in the Vashikaran which she has nothing to do with rather she is the one that is charged with the serious accusations.
But, they admit that the Olympians do not interfere with someone's being or fate unless needed. This is how they see it: undoubtedly the use of one's brain, desire, and lead conduct into the way another person think. A child thinks about a parent the exact way as a parent thinks for a child. Teachers play a central role in a student's achievement helping them gain more knowledge.
Those participants treat each other imaginatively as they can just to please one another. We can say that vashikaran is a concentrated form of this nature power that can be described by the metaphor in the poetic form, manifesting in the physical and mental levels both of the sorcerer and the target person.
The offbeat element of Indrajaal Vashikaran has been to inspire my thinking with attention for a long time. The same thing applies to both the small and the strong powers; they must rely on wisdom and caution so that the evil of good is not done.
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Prison has resumed to its normal self after the three days’ search interlude. If I'm to choose a theme song for this period it'd be The Storm is Over by R Kelly because that's just what it feels like. Today feels like the next day after a prolonged period of crisis, the first day of sunrise after extended tenure of darkness. Call it the day of days if we can say that.
Opening time was at 8 am. Inmates rushed out excitedly from their cells in such a way that one would think an announcement just came that everyone is free. I don't blame anyone though. We only had 20 minutes of open-out each of those days.
I remained in my bunk while others jostled out from their cells to everywhere within the four walls. I think the thing in open-out for me is having others go out so I can stay inside in peace. Nothing in my going out, I hardly do these days anyway. Though I admit that there's a good feel to knowing you can go out when you choose even if you don't. Knowing you can is freeing.
Things and structures are gradually falling back in place. The guys in the privileged blocks – Blocks One and Two – are gradually having their stuff which were transported out of the yard motored back into it. Though some of them haven't been able to start cooking due to having their entire “kitchen” taken out.
The basketball court was busy. Infact, every activity formerly allowed in prison has come back. Things are just as if nothing happened. I haven't found one person crying for having lost his phone, but then I haven't seen many people since I haven't gone out of the cell besides when I stepped out to sun my sweat-soaked pillow.
At night, after lock-up, prison law came down heavily upon those who sinned during the search days. The court cell convened and four cases were tried. Then the court dissolved and the cell was silenced for the provost.
He took the floor and addressed everyone, pointing out that some cell members disobeyed the order to make sure no contraband (phone) was found in the cell. His intention was to caution them but Sunny, the clever cobbler, became very unruly and put them all in trouble.
Meanwhile, the provost had earlier called us into a quick meeting during the day concerning issues in the cell. Majorly, these people were the focus and our position was that they be warned or punished according to the provost's wish.
Sunny becoming unruly while the provost made to warn them automatically instantiated the punishment protocol. Instead of warning, they were ordered to change themselves to other cells before lock-up tomorrow. And everyone answered “as you worship pleases.” They're all persona non grata now. Even Cell Pastor Isi is affected, I’ve been protecting him for long but no more. He leaves the cell with the others except something else comes up.
Tomorrow is Thursday. Authority Day and late opening will surely be in place.
Goodnight Diary!

I am looking for a lady between 25 and 35 years old, for a committed monogamous childfree relationship. My goal is to become a true team, supporting each other, caring for each other, nurturing each other and helping each other grow and realise our goals and dreams as much as possible. I'm hoping to find someone that values a relationship as much as I do and takes it seriously. It's not the only thing my life revolves around, but it's also not just something 'nice to have' for me.
I am 186cm tall, slim/fit built, dark brown hair, brown eyes. Both my arms are tattooed (full sleeve), as are my calves and the areas above my ankles. Regarding pictures see below. I am a runner, training multiple times a week. I'm also vegan. My love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. While I am mostly securely attached, withdrawing from me triggers anxiety and I have made a horrible experience with an avoidant partner in the past, so that is something I fear I cannot deal with again.
I am also an atheist.
I am a very warm, soft and sensitive person, I think I am humorous, I am self reflecting a lot and I can also be really passionate and romantic. Those are traits that also are really important to me in a woman.
I can be quite social, I am a good talker, but also love to listen to really get to know someone on a deeper level. I can enjoy an evening out with friends just as much as the silence of sitting at the shores of the river and watching the sunset in solitude (although I've been craving to watch it together with a partner for a really long time now). I can be out in a pub, at a rave, a metal show or at a football game and have the time of my life, but I cannot do these things every day; I need recharge time (on the sofa, in the woods for a run, a lazy Sunday staying in bed etc.). This should give you an idea; basically, I am a homebody that thoroughly enjoys going out in moderation.
I won't say too much about hobbies; suffice it to say I am into the dark, the obscure, the macabre, the occult, the mysterious, the erotic. It won't surprise you that I had a gothic phase in my youth, bonus points if you did too!
What I'm looking for
Although similar hobbies and interests are a plus, emotional and intimate compatibility are more important to me. I am a very sensitive and emotional person (I do cry easily and by this point I don't think I'll ever be able to change that, sorry), so if you're too, we will definitely understand each other. I need someone who I can open up to (which I do rather quickly, anyway), be myself, bare my soul to and I need these things from you, too. I've had my share of emotionally unavailable women who were afraid of intimacy so I know I can't deal with that again because of the way how those things affect me. I am always emotionally invested with the woman I pursue and in those cases that was to my detriment. But my ability to feel so deep is also something I wouldn't want to change because as of yet, although it's getting harder, I haven't given up on finding someone.
With those emotional needs come two requirements that I found to be vital over the years: First, being able to be silly and cutesy together and to accept each other's inner child and care for it. I am not talking about having to deal with another person's immaturity or inability to perform basic adult skills, rather with the way sadness, hurt, anxiety and being overwhelmed manifests for me (and maybe for you, too?). I need someone who is able to comfort me, to hold me, to allow me to be weak and needy for a while until I've calmed down, and I'm more than ready to offer the same. Your inner child can come out for a while, no problem (: Also in a positive way: Thankfully, today everyone seems to be understanding of the cuteness overload cats (or any animal baby, really) can cause; I need that with a partner. I also still have plushies as comfort animals and ideally, you do too.
Apparently in every relationship, one person is the stronger one. In the past, I have been with women who obviously were stronger than me, but that doesn't mean they always had to be strong, far from it. I certainly need to be able to feel protected, but it's not like I'm a particularly needy partner, like everyone, I have my ups and downs, but I can pull my weight and have been told by past partners that I am very caring and that they felt safe and understood with me, and providing that for my partner is really important for me as well.
Second, intimate compatibility. I am rather insatiable and love to experiment when it comes to the bedroom, so you should, too, in order that we can explore and enjoy together. I found out how fulfilling living out those fantasies can be after years of never being able to try and in a relationship, this kind of fulfillment for both partners is a must for me. I found the term 'filthy best friends and partners' to be a perfect description.
I'm looking for a balance between healthy independence and being emotionally present. A relationship where we 'get' each other; we're both each other's number one and treat each other like royalty. Where a disagreement leads to more intimacy between us as we understand better, not to resentment. Where we're comfortable baring our souls to each other, becoming a safe haven and secure base for each other. I don't like the modern notion that you 'should never feel too safe in a relationship' because that sounds like running from the mafia (and believe me, I love mafia movies); you should always put in effort, yes, but safety is one of the things I always want to experience and provide in a relationship. We shouldn't fear that a disagreement leads straight to breakup. I know ‘self-sufficiency’ is trending right now, but I feel like as partners, we’re partly responsible for each other and not our own but also each other’s happiness. Being dependant and dependable at the same time is important; making each other’s wellbeing a priority. If you’re not able to healthily depend on someone and their support while you’re having a hard time, look elsewhere. If I have to be afraid you’ll run at the first major problem that surfaces, even if it’s a ‘you’-problem, it’s not going to work. I think that all things can and need to be talked about. If you think ignoring someone for days is a form of communication, please look elsewhere.
I am looking for someone real. We all have our problems, I don't want or need a 'perfect' person. You don't have everything figured out or 'all your shit' together. Be imperfect. Admit when you feel sad and angry, lonely, hopeless or even helpless – it's all relatable. Don't hide it. Be quirky, be dorky, be witchy, opinionated, be yourself. Don't pretend.
I'm looking for someone to share romance with. Not great gestures, but small, meaningful ones. Poems for each other, expressing our feelings; cards with heartfelt messages that we put our perfume/cologne on, and a symbol that means something to us only, the print of your lips with lipstick, the way I sign and seal my letters for you.
Just as important to me is agreeing on living a healthy life, staying in shape both for ourselves and for each other, regularly working out and eating healthy. I am drug and disease-free and expect the same of you. I do drink as I love a good beer or glass of wine, rum or whiskey, but I've never really been drinking much and especially during the past year have further reduced it. One vice I have is that I enjoy a couple of cigars a year, but I can definitely accommodate you in this regard.
Another important point is aligned life goals: I value safety more than adventure. I want to build a home together with my partner, a safespace for the both of us, where we always feel loved and protected, a place that we create together, make it cozy together so we just love to get back home there wherever we might have been, a home we decorate together for Halloween (my favourite holiday) or Christmas or Springtime, as we live in tune with the seasons, enjoying nature on a walk or the rain outside, reading in our cozy home. I value stability and harmony.
Appearance-wise, I am into ladies on the smaller side), so I'm looking for someone petite/slim/skinny/healthy-fit. Likewise, I am not really muscular and don't have visible abs; like I said, I'm a runner, so if you're more into the gym-type, I'm not a good fit.
I’d prefer to move from text to voice calls, videochat and then meeting up, all of that rather sooner than later. Not that there’s a need to rush anything, but I’d rather see earlier if we’re compatible or not; as someone who catches feelings fast I need to protect myself.
Caveats

• I don't like travelling as it stresses me out; I don't mind being somewhere else for a week or two, but the organisation part of it drains my energy very quickly and dealing with stuff that doesn't work out is overwhelming to me. Smaller trips are ok, but I'm not the right person to travel the world with.
• I am not the most awake person in the morning (i.e. I identify as nightowl)
• I don't want children and had a vasectomy
• I need space for my own projects/time to recharge after social interaction.
• While I feel like I am in tune with my inner child and working on/with it through therapy, I realise this is something that could be a turn-off for people.
• I have been diagnosed with depressive episodes in the past and am taking anti-depressants right now. I realise that I am a work in progress, maybe more so than in times past, but I manage and the fact that I'm putting myself out here is based on me being ready to get to know someone new.
• I want to create a home together here, as I'm firmly rooted where I was born; I realise this is a lot to ask, but I have seen many people here being open to moving, so I want to at least try reaching out to them.

If you're interested, feel free to message me and include some pictures of yourself and I will reply with my own. Have a nice day (:

I just downloaded the free trial for Hitman pro, and thought it might be a good idea to purchase.
The website makes it look like a one-time cost, which is fine, but the email I got says annual subscription

**Thank you for choosing us!**You are receiving this email because you have recently activated a free trial license to remove devious or resilient threats from your PC. However, your free subscription requires a confirmation. By confirming, you expressly agree to receive newsletters and other promotional communications from Surfright B.V. and other companies in the Sophos group. You will also receive an email with the opportunity to purchase a HitmanPro 1 PC – 1 Year license with a 30% discount in our online shop.Thank you for choosing us!You are receiving this email because you have recently activated a free trial license to remove devious or resilient threats from your PC. However, your free subscription requires a confirmation. By confirming, you expressly agree to receive newsletters and other promotional communications from Surfright B.V. and other companies in the Sophos group. You will also receive an email with the opportunity to purchase a HitmanPro 1 PC – 1 Year license with a 30% discount in our online shop.

So which is it? Happy to pay a one time cost for this, but not sure I want to go for an annual thing.

General
I am looking for a lady between 28 and 35 years old, for a committed monogamous childfree relationship. My goal is to become a true team, supporting each other, caring for each other, nurturing each other and helping each other grow and realise our goals and dreams as much as possible. I'm hoping to find someone that values a relationship as much as I do and takes it seriously. It's not the only thing my life revolves around, but it's also not just something 'nice to have' for me.
I tried to be as concise as possible while still providing what details I think are crucial to know; I realise this post turned out very long, but I prefer those because I can get as good an idea as possible with detailed descriptions, bar actually talking to the person, and find that very valuable, so if that also applies to you, that would be awesome.
Basics
I am 186cm tall, slim/fit built, dark brown hair, brown eyes. Both my arms are tattooed (full sleeve), as are my calves and the areas above my ankles. Regarding pictures see below. I am a runner (ranging from 5k to full marathon), training multiple times a week. I'm also vegan. My love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. While I am mostly securely attached, withdrawing from me triggers anxiety and I have made a horrible experience with a fearful avoidant partner in the past, so that is something I fear I cannot deal with again.
I am also an atheist.
I am a very warm, soft and sensitive person, I think I am humorous, I am self reflecting a lot and I can also be really passionate and romantic. Those are traits that also are really important to me in a woman.
I can be quite social, I am a good talker, but also love to listen to really get to know someone on a deeper level. I can enjoy an evening out with friends just as much as the silence of sitting at the shores of the river and watching the sunset in solitude (although I've been craving to watch it together with a partner for a really long time now). I can be out in a pub, at a rave, a metal show or in the stadium watching football and have the time of my life, but I cannot do these things every day; I need recharge time (on the sofa, in the woods for a run, a lazy Sunday staying in bed etc.). This should give you an idea; basically, I am a homebody that thoroughly enjoys going out in moderation.
I won't say too much about hobbies; suffice it to say I am into the dark, the obscure, the macabre, the occult, the mysterious, the erotic. It won't surprise you that I had a gothic phase in my youth, bonus points if you did too!
What I am looking for
Although similar hobbies and interests are a plus (and there have to be at least a couple things we have in common), emotional and sexual compatibility are more important to me. I am a very sensitive and emotional person (I do cry easily and by this point I don't think I'll ever be able to change that, sorry), so if you're too, we will definitely understand each other. I need someone who I can open up to (which I do rather quickly, anyway), be myself, bare my soul to and I need these things from you, too. I've had my share of emotionally unavailable women who were afraid of intimacy so I know I can't deal with that again because of the way how those things affect me. I am always emotionally invested with the woman I pursue and in those cases that was to my detriment. But my ability to feel so deep is also something I wouldn't want to change because as of yet, although it's getting harder, I haven't given up on finding someone.
With those emotional needs come two requirements that I found to be vital over the years: First, being able to be silly and cutesy together and to accept each other's inner child and care for it. I am not talking about having to deal with another person's immaturity or inability to perform basic adult skills, rather with the way sadness, hurt, anxiety and being overwhelmed manifests for me (and maybe for you, too?). I need someone who is able to comfort me, to hold me, to allow me to be weak and needy for a while until I've calmed down, and I'm more than ready to offer the same. Your inner child can come out for a while, no problem (: Also in a positive way: Thankfully, today everyone seems to be understanding of the cuteness overload cats (or any animal baby, really) can cause; I need that with a partner. I also still have plushies as comfort animals (some of which in quite a litteral sense as they make for really amazing pillows) and ideally, you do too.
There is a saying that in every relationship, one person is the stronger one. In the past, I have been with women who obviously were stronger than me, but that doesn't mean they always had to be strong, far from it. I certainly, like I said, need to be able to feel protected, but it's not like I'm a particularly needy partner, like everyone, I have my ups and downs, but I can pull my weight and have been told by past partners that I am very caring and that they felt safe and understood with me, and providing that for my partner is really important for me as well – this just to put the picture I'm (somewhat haphazardly) trying to paint into perspective.
Second, sexual compatibility. I have a high libido and I have kinks, so you should, too, in order that we can explore and enjoy them together. I found out how fulfilling living out those fantasies can be after years of never being able to try and in a relationship, sexual fulfillment for both partners is a must for me. Someone on here has coined the term 'filthy best friends and partners' which I have no shame to be stealing because it's such an apt description.
I'm looking for a balance between healthy independence and being emotionally present. A relationship where we 'get' each other; we're both each other's number one and treat each other like royalty. Where a disagreement leads to more intimacy between us as we understand better, not to resentment. Where we're comfortable baring our souls to each other, becoming a safe haven and secure base for each other. I don't like the modern notion that you 'should never feel too safe in a relationship' because that sounds like running from the mafia (and believe me, I love mafia movies); you should always put in effort, yes, but safety is one of the things I always want to experience and provide in a relationship. We shouldn't fear that a disagreement leads straight to breakup. I know ‘self-sufficiency’ is trending right now, but I feel like as partners, we’re partly responsible for each other and not our own but also each other’s happiness. Being dependant and dependable at the same time is important; making each other’s wellbeing a priority. I love the relationship model outlined in Stan Tatkin’s ‘Wired for Love’ and you should, too. If you’re not able to healthily depend on someone and their support while you’re having a hard time, look elsewhere. I know codependency is the latest thing everyone’s afraid of, but experiencing someone you’ve grown very attached to just bailing because they’re counterdependent and can’t stand working on themselves while simultaneously letting you in is something I’d rather not go through again. If I have to be afraid you’ll run at the first major problem that surfaces, even if it’s a ‘you’-problem, it’s not going to work. I think that all things can and need to be talked about. If you think ignoring someone for days is a form of communication, please look elsewhere. If you think’s it’s okay to lovebomb someone and then leave after a couple of months with the minimum amount of information and no proper conversation because you’re not ready to own up to what’s happening to you emotionally, please look elsewhere.
I am looking for someone real. We all have our problems, I don't want or need a 'perfect' person. You don't have everything figured out or 'all your shit' together. Be imperfect. Admit when you feel sad and angry, lonely, hopeless or even helpless – it's all relatable. Don't hide it. Be quirky, be dorky, be witchy, be opinionated, be yourself. Don't pretend.
I'm looking for someone to share romance with. Not great gestures, but small, meaningful ones. Poems for each other, expressing our feelings; cards with heartfelt messages that we put our perfume/cologne on, and a symbol that means something to us only, the print of your lips with lipstick, the way I sign and seal my letters for you.
Just as important to me is agreeing on living a healthy life, staying in shape both for ourselves and for each other, regularly working out and eating healthy. I am drug and disease-free and expect the same of you. I do drink as I love a good beer or glass of wine, rum or whiskey, but I've never really been drinking much and especially during the past year have further reduced it. One vice I have is that I enjoy a couple of cigars a year, but I can definitely accommodate you in this regard.
Another important point is aligned life goals: many childfree people seem to be adventurous, but that is a trait I don't associate with myself at all. I value safety more than adventure. I want to build a home together with my partner, a safespace for the both of us, where we always feel loved and protected, a place that we create together, make it cozy together so we just love to get back home there wherever we might have been, a home we decorate together for Halloween (my favourite holiday) or Christmas or Springtime, as we live in tune with the seasons, seeing them change around us, enjoying nature on a walk or the rain outside, reading in our cozy home. I value stability and harmony.
Appearance-wise, I am into ladies on the smaller side (albeit not regarding height), so I'm looking for someone petite/slim/skinny/healthy-fit. Likewise, I am not really muscular and don't have visible abs; like I said, I'm a runner, so if you're more into the gym-type, I'm not a good fit.
The natural progression for me would be to move from text to voice calls, videochat and then meeting up, all of that rather sooner than later. Not that there’s a need to rush anything, but having my heart broken because I already developed feelings due to a longer timeframe and then everything unexpectedly turning to shit is not something I want to have to live through again. I’d rather see earlier if we’re compatible or not; as someone who catches feelings fast I need to protect myself, I unfortunately had to learn that
Caveats/Possible red flags

• I don't like travelling as it stresses me out; I don't mind being somewhere else for a week or two, but the organisation part of it drains my energy very quickly and dealing with stuff that doesn't work out is overwhelming to me. Smaller trips are ok, but I'm not the right person to travel the world with.
• I am not the most awake person in the morning (i.e. I identify as nightowl)
• I need space for my own projects/time to recharge after social interaction.
• While I feel like I am in tune with my inner child and working on/with it through therapy, I realise this is something that could be a turn-off for people.
• I have been diagnosed with depressive episodes in the past and am taking anti-depressants right now. I realise that I am a work in progress, maybe more so than in times past, but I manage and the fact that I'm putting myself out here is based on me being ready to get to know someone new.
• I want to create a home together here, as I'm firmly rooted where I was born; I realise this is a lot to ask, but I have seen many people here being open to moving, so I want to at least try reaching out to them.

If you're interested, feel free to message me and include some pictures of yourself and I will reply with my own. Have a nice day (:

I don’t get it I try, I think, I feel to understand. I know exactly where I lack as a person and I’m working through it. I can say it’s not easy to rid of certain habits. I know I lucky/ blessed to have the family that I do. Though sometimes it feels like family is just an unwanted obligation for someone in my family maybe all of us. I have two siblings who help each other out by offering to not have to pay rent on two separate occasions which both do well in getting paid. Currently one is not paying any portion of my sibling mortgage and she’s falling behind. To help follow along I’ll assign sibling numbers. Sibling 1 was the first one to purchase a home and is the 3 child out of 4. Sibling 2 is the second child out of 4. So I first found out about a year and half ago that sibling 3 offered sibling 2 a room rent free in her house while myself and sibling 4 were paying sometimes late but still paid. There were only two separate occasions where I could not pay. Sibling 2 told me she was offered that though because sibling 2 understood my situation they decided to pay to help myself and sibling 4. Now sibling 3 is still taking advantage by not paying anything to sibling 2 at their property mean while my money, a tenants money that I secured and sibling 4’s money with their partner is paying for the mortgage. Sibling 3 knows how difficult we’ve struggled with our finances ,though of course it not her responsibility, and they believe by charging us rent to pay for their mortgage it’s their way of helping us. Yes it’s cheaper than it would be in other places which I’m thankful. Though it also has not been easy living with sibling 3 when they were here. I did my best to stay out of their way and not bug them since I knew having a safe space is important though it never was enough just by simply being around they claimed we were ruining their life like I was somehow responsible for her feelings. Which I know that I’m not just like I never tried to make them responsible for my feelings caused by their actions. I don’t know what to do or more so I know what to do though fear takes a hold of me for this over a quarter of my life I’ve lived I’ve never lived out on my own for long there was always someone in the house and now I have a responsibility with one of my parents and soon I believe I’ll also be responsible for my other parent. Though sibling 3 never really said these words, their actions make me feel like we are a nuisance. I also feel sibling 3 is in denial of who they truly are cause it’s always seems like everyone else is at fault except them. I feel that even if I’m not in their life or anyone else they claim is preventing them from having the perfect life, they will always find someone to blame or something. I wanted to be part of sibling 3’s life though I don’t think it’s going to happen because they only want it their way not any other way. I’m a believer in finding middle ground or neither my way or their way. I also understand the reasoning behind their action and thought process and they claim to be ahead of the rest of the family in the healing journey though they don’t see how their trauma is making decisions in their life. I wish I could speak with them ,and this could also be a decision my own trauma/past experiences with them deciding this for me or the fear of them just leaving my parent and I homeless for speaking my mind with them. I know the type of person I am because I have questioned all my actions good and bad. I also know that everyone who knows me knows a different me. I am not viewed the same by any two people. I need to take my parent and get away from sibling 3 I’ve tried to establish a relationship though it only works when two parties are willing to work on it which sibling 2 and I are doing. It makes me feel different types of emotions that I can’t have this with siblings 3. TLDR

hello i just got into making film vids on tik tok and randomly got a message saying they wanna get me to the premier of a movie for free so i can review it. idk if it’s real or not would love to know. i only have 900 followers btw.
this was the message
Hi, I’m reaching out on behalf of Roadside Attraction’s new film Summer Camp available in theaters May 31st. Featuring the dynamic cast of Diane Keaton, Kathy Bates, Alfre Woodard, Eugene Levy, Josh Peck, Nicole Richie, and more - Summer Camp is a fun story about friendship and the rediscovery of our youthful spirit.
Summer Camp follows Nora, Ginny, and Mary - three childhood best friends who used to spend every summer at a sleep-away camp together growing up. After years, when the opportunity to get back together for a summer camp reunion presents itself, they all seize it.
Based on your profile and creative work, we think you’d be a great partner for the film’s release. If you think this is the type of film you would enjoy, we’re excited to grant you exclusive free early access to the film before its theatrical release on May 31st.
Please find the trailer at the following link and let us know if you'd like to participate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_na6hBhm18
Looking forward to hearing from you.