Ot treatment plan template
FET Treatment Protocol Options for Suspected Silent Endo / Adenomyosis
2024.06.02 09:09 fillinginthe__ FET Treatment Protocol Options for Suspected Silent Endo / Adenomyosis
Hi all!
I am an out-of-state travel patient at my fertility clinic and just had my egg retrieval yesterday (13 retrieved, 10 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI). Some of my ultrasounds resulted in an indication of “ill-defined endometrial-myometrial interface as can be seen in the setting of adenomyosis” and my provider has concerns there is co-occurring silent endometriosis.
I would like to be aware of potential treatment plans to increase success of the FET after PGT-A results — likely I won’t have a conversation about things until we receive our PGT-A results and it would be nice to research possible options.
submitted by fillinginthe__ to IVF [link] [comments]
I am an out-of-state travel patient at my fertility clinic and just had my egg retrieval yesterday (13 retrieved, 10 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI). Some of my ultrasounds resulted in an indication of “ill-defined endometrial-myometrial interface as can be seen in the setting of adenomyosis” and my provider has concerns there is co-occurring silent endometriosis.
I would like to be aware of potential treatment plans to increase success of the FET after PGT-A results — likely I won’t have a conversation about things until we receive our PGT-A results and it would be nice to research possible options.
2024.06.02 09:04 Stage-Piercing727 Best Adidas Military Boots
 | submitted by Stage-Piercing727 to u/Stage-Piercing727 [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/ksqpmrymx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9003ccf9dd52ba566b28da28a6fd021a6d147f80 Get ready to dive into the world of Adidas Military Boots as we bring you the ultimate guide to these versatile, rugged footwear! Explore a variety of styles, materials, and features that make these boots stand out in the market. Discover the perfect pair for your outdoor adventures or everyday wear. The Top 15 Best Adidas Military Boots
Reviews🔗Under Armour Stellar G2 Tactical Boots: Breathable, Waterproof, and Comfortable for Long Shiftshttps://preview.redd.it/kwodysjnx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=65d7d7fc3e1ac79c31166f9ee1df237ac5be4787 Imagine slogging through a muddy construction site or trekking through a wet forest without feeling a single drop of water on your feet. That's the promise of the Under Armour Stellar G2 Waterproof Tactical Boots. I've tried these babies myself and let me tell you, they've been a game-changer. First things first, the outer material is 100% leather, giving these boots a rugged, durable feel that can withstand any challenge I throw at them. But the real standout feature? The waterproofing. I'll admit, I was skeptical at first, but these boots kept my feet dry in the dampest conditions, making them a reliable companion on any outdoor excursion. Now, I did notice a little issue with the traction on these bad boys. They tend to slip on some surfaces, which can be a bit of a hazard in certain situations. But that's a small price to pay for the overall comfort and protection these boots provide. Speaking of comfort, the die-cut EVA footbed and molded EVA, TPU shank make for a cushioned, supportive experience, even during long shifts. As for the aesthetics, these boots are no slouch. The sleek, black design exudes an air of professionalism, which is always a bonus when you're working on a job site. But remember, always prioritize function over form. In conclusion, the Under Armour Stellar G2 Waterproof Tactical Boots are a solid choice for anyone looking for reliable, waterproof footwear. Just remember to keep an eye on the traction and you're good to go. 🔗Under Armour Men's Stellar G2 6" Tactical Boots - Breathable & Odor-Resistanthttps://preview.redd.it/j9kcesznx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3d60b4ad770dca17db30decfcfab84b5b4c7afce I recently got a pair of Under Armour Men's Stellar G2 6" Tactical Boots and they exceeded my expectations in terms of comfort and design. The light and breathable textile upper with full-grain polishable leather forefoot provided a great balance of durability and flexibility. I loved the molded Contoura Support anti-odor footbed with shock-absorbing foam as it made long walks a breeze, even without insoles. The molded EVA midsole cushioning with reinforced TPU shank gave me excellent protection and support, keeping my feet comfortable all day. Moreover, the oil- and slip-resistant high-traction rubber lug outsole offered a solid grip on various surfaces. However, there were a few aspects that I found disappointing. Firstly, the front and back pull loops made the on/off process a bit difficult for me. Secondly, my previous pair of tactical boots felt more comfortable due to their thickness and weather resistance. Lastly, the size of the boots was somewhat small, so I had to go up one size. Despite the minor drawbacks, I'd definitely recommend these boots to anyone looking for a comfortable and stylish pair of tactical boots. 🔗Salomon Forces 4D GTX Tactical Hiking Boots for Menhttps://preview.redd.it/odw8viaox34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e6d3597ecd9c271c58efbeef0a8533f567b9f3c The quest for the perfect tactical shoe has led me to the Salomon Forces Men Quest 4D GTX 2 EN. With a sleek design and plenty of features to make my treks more comfortable, I've been putting these boots through the paces. One of the most noticeable features in this shoe is its dual-density midsole, which provides superior cushioning, stability, and motion control. The EVA foam in these boots is high-performance, offering excellent shock attenuation as I hike through various terrains. The nonreflective materials make these shoes perfect for tactical use, as they're always discrete and blended in with the environment. The soft, breathable lining of this shoe has been a game-changer in terms of moisture-wicking foot comfort. The gusseted tongue design prevented debris from entering the shoe, keeping the tongue centered and eliminating the need for constant adjustments. It's a great feature to have, especially when I'm trudging through mud or over uneven ground. In terms of fit, the molded OrthoLite sockliner matched the contours of my foot, providing a snug and comfortable fit. The ISO 20344:2011 puncture-resistant sole also made me feel more secure when navigating through rough terrain. While I love the ventilation, ankle support, water resistance, and other features of these boots, there are some minor downsides. The traction, although solid, could be better in some situations. Also, the regular lacing system can be a bit tedious, especially when I need to quickly tie and untie the boots. Overall, the Salomon Forces Men Quest 4D GTX 2 EN has been a great addition to my outdoor gear collection. It provides comfort and support during my hikes and tactical missions, making it a reliable tool for the job. While there are some minor issues, the benefits of these boots far outweigh the drawbacks. 🔗Authentic U.S. G.I. Mickey Mouse Winter Boots for Men and Kids - Unused and Affordablehttps://preview.redd.it/fev074rox34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=46243200ad5989c69607a8b9765cd355bfccfff7 When I first heard about these Mickey Mouse boots, I was intrigued by their distinctive design paired with their military origins. So, I decided to give them a shot while embarking on a snowmobiling adventure. As I strapped them on, I was initially surprised by how heavy they were. But once I stepped into the deep snow, I immediately comprehended the weight's significance - it signified the durability and robustness of these boots. The wool and waterproof exterior managed to keep my feet warm and dry even in the harsh subzero temperatures. However, their unique design did catch quite a few stares, but hey, it's not every day someone's feet are decked out like a set of Mickey Mouse ears. Overall, these boots delivered the expected functionality, even though they made me look like a walking Disney attraction. 🔗Comfortable Lightweight Adidas Military Boots - Rugged & Stylish Outdoor Footwearhttps://preview.redd.it/aqho352px34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64acbf040daa1f8310fd1ed0ac24a92b13c8e9c8 When I first tried on the Men's Stellar G2 Tactical Boots from Under Armour, I was impressed by the lightweight feel and the durable leather forefoot. The high traction rubber lug outsole definitely came in handy during my daily walks in different surfaces, providing me with a firm grip. However, after a few weeks of regular use, I noticed that the zipper started to malfunction, making it difficult to take the boots off or put them on. Despite this inconvenience, the style of the boots and their overall comfort were definitely attractive features. 🔗Adidas Terrex Snowpitch COLD.RDY Hiking Boots - Lightweight, Insulated, and Weather-Resistanthttps://preview.redd.it/jbn0aggpx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9382c65039c9d4ca0f1e1ab45e2682c8b0577b45 Recently, I had the chance to try out the Adidas Terrex Snowpitch COLD. RDY hiking boots, and I must say, I was impressed. The leather upper has a stylish and long-lasting appeal, while the insulated and water-repellent COLD. RDY technology kept my feet warm and dry in any weather. One feature I particularly enjoyed was the textile innersole that added extra comfort to my feet. The hiking boots also offered great support and traction, making them perfect for my outdoor adventures. However, I did notice that the rubber outsole was a bit tricky to clean. Overall, I highly recommend these boots for fellow outdoor enthusiasts who are looking for a reliable and comfortable pair. 🔗Adidas Terrex Heron Mid Hiking Boot with PrimaLoft Insulation - Waterproof and Climaproof Shoeshttps://preview.redd.it/ydgrxurpx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0101a453d256d0b5483c15d12630f8ca72393154 Over the past few weeks, I've been using the Adidas Terrex Heron Mid CW CP PrimaLoft Hiking Boots in my daily life. These boots have been a reliable companion on my hikes, providing both comfort and protection from the elements. One of the standout features is the waterproof and climaproof construction, keeping my feet dry even in the wettest conditions. The PrimaLoft insulation material is another highlight, providing extra warmth in colder temperatures. One aspect that I found impressive is the Stealth rubber outsole, which offers unbeatable grip on slippery or icy ground. This feature, combined with the mid-height cuff, ensures that I'm always stable on any trail I encounter. However, there were also some downsides to my experience. The boots seem to run a bit large, which may cause some unwanted bulk for people with narrow or standard-width feet. Additionally, the lacing system can be a bit finicky, requiring a bit more effort to get the fit just right. In conclusion, the Adidas Terrex Heron Mid CW CP PrimaLoft Hiking Boots have been a reliable companion on my hikes, providing both comfort and protection. The waterproof and insulated features are especially noteworthy, but potential buyers should be aware of the sizing issues and the need for a snug fit. 🔗Ultra-Comfortable Military Boots by Under Armourhttps://preview.redd.it/ju6h9q5qx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=92dbe23427d929eae9d5f50713e4d68daded76df Experience the ultimate blend of comfort and durability with the Under Armour Tac Loadout Boots. These boots are crafted with 100% synthetic materials, boasting a rubber sole that provides unbeatable traction on any surface. Under Armour's mission to innovate extends to these boots, as they feature ultralight Micro G EVA inner midsoles for all-day comfort and quick-dry materials to keep your feet dry throughout the day. Designed for various environments and challenges, the Tac Loadout Boots are equipped with durable uppers made from roughout leather and Cordura nylon, ensuring they withstand rough use day after day. The Vibram outsole with MegaGrip rubber provides excellent grip, while the heel tabs make it easy to slide in and out of the boots. I had the chance to test these boots, and I couldn't be more impressed. The lightweight and supportive design is perfect for long marches, and the breathable material keeps my feet from getting overheated. Although the soles may take time to break in, their comfort and durability make them well worth the effort. One small concern is that the boots could use better toe protection, especially for those in demanding environments. Overall, the Under Armour Tac Loadout Boots are an excellent choice for anyone seeking a reliable, comfortable, and versatile pair of boots. With their innovative design and superior performance, these boots are perfect for tackling any challenge that comes your way. 🔗Adidas Terrex Unity Leather Mid Hiking Shoes - Water-Repellent and Durablehttps://preview.redd.it/58po4xjqx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3d5e49287e44d4f4ec3785a2641da09371d14ff4 I recently had the opportunity to try out the Adidas Terrex Unity Leather Mid RAIN. RDY hiking shoes, and I must say, I was impressed. The nubuck leather upper felt sturdy and durable, while the lugged outsole provided excellent grip on various surfaces. Despite being marketed as water-repellent, the shoes didn't seem to get wet easily during my outdoor adventures. The EVA midsole was comfortable, especially for those long hikes. However, I did find the lace closure a bit fiddly at times. Overall, the Adidas Terrex hiking shoes were a solid choice for those looking for a reliable, durable, and comfortable pair of shoes for their outdoor excursions. 🔗Adidas Tactical ADV: Cushioned Snowboarding Boots with Responsive Boost Midsolehttps://preview.redd.it/qk6gbp0rx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b2ae09fabbbfd38aca1d84caeed653133e34033f Over the past few weeks, I've been putting the Adidas Tactical ADV 2021 Snowboard Boots through their paces in the slopes near my home. Let me tell you, these boots have been a game-changer in my snowboarding adventures. They're incredibly comfortable, and I appreciate how the textile upper and heat-moldable Ultralon foam liner work together to make these boots feel like an extension of my feet. One of my favorite features is the boot lacing system; it's so user-friendly that I can easily adjust the fit on the go. The rubber outsole provides great traction on those icy slopes, while the responsive Boost midsole ensures a cushioned ride that keeps my feet feeling fresh even after a long day on the mountain. That being said, there are a few minor drawbacks. While I love the boot's versatility, I found the sizing to be a bit on the larger side. I'd recommend going down a half-size for a better fit. Additionally, the boots tend to wear out faster than I'd like, but I suppose that's the price we pay for such comfortable and responsive footwear. Overall, the Adidas Tactical ADV 2021 Snowboard Boots are a worthy investment for snowboarding enthusiasts. They offer a perfect balance of comfort, performance, and style that's hard to beat in the world of snowboarding footwear. 🔗High-Performance Oakley Field Assault Boots: Comfort, Durability, and Stylehttps://preview.redd.it/krskbgdrx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dd39befd7e4bef4c5acda297238605c859382da5 My experience with the Oakley Field Assault Boot (Coyote) has been a positive one. The durability of this boot is top-notch, thanks to the 1000-denier Cordura and suede upper. This lightweight and breathable material also adds to the overall comfort of the boot. The Vibram rubber lug outsole is a standout feature, providing impressive traction and stability, even in the harshest conditions. The molded EVA insert and injection polyurethane midsole ensure comfort for long periods and even absorb shock effectively. The braided nylon laces are sturdy and provide a secure fit, but they could use some reinforcement to last longer. In terms of pros, the Oakley Field Assault Boot offers unparalleled durability, comfort, and traction. Cons include the thinness of the laces and the stiffness around the ankle. Overall, this military-style boot stands out for its performance and sleek design. 🔗Adidas Eastrail 2.0 Mid RAIN.RDY Black Waterproof Hiking Shoes with Enhanced Durabilityhttps://preview.redd.it/5tqqbuqrx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bd51bd6cc7d3a3efe0574f667f24bf76bfc3973f I have been using the Adidas Eastrail 2.0 Mid RAIN. RDY shoes in my daily adventures, and I must say it has been quite an experience up until now. When it comes to the aesthetics, the shoes have a unique and edgy design, especially in the green color I ordered. The size 48 fits me perfectly, and I'm glad Adidas gave me the option to select the right size for myself. One thing that stood out to me right off the bat is the lace-up fastening. It wasn't difficult at all to tie the shoes, and they stayed securely on my feet throughout the day. The mesh upper and synthetic reinforcements made by recycled material have proven to be quite durable, even during rainy days. On the negative side, the EVA midsole felt a little bit uncomfortable after prolonged usage. It seemed to me like my feet wouldn't dry quickly during the rainy seasons, which I guess could be due to the material they're made from. Overall, I would say the Adidas Eastrail 2.0 Mid RAIN. RDY shoes are a decent choice for those looking for waterproof hiking boots with a modern edge. While there are a couple of cons that I've personally experienced, I'm willing to give them another shot and see if they hold up in various weather conditions. 🔗Under Armour Men's Coyote Micro G Valsetz Mid Tactical Boots - Lightweight & Breathablehttps://preview.redd.it/wdgh9m7sx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8f421723e651abf08e0f9920609a14db9d0a220f The Under Armour Coyote Micro G Valsetz Mid Tactical Boots have been a game-changer for me. The first thing I noticed was how lightweight they were – a real plus when you're on your feet for long periods. The synthetic leather and nylon upper felt not only soft but also breathable, which was a major plus during those sweltering summer days. One of the key features that stood out for me was the oil- and slip-resistant rubber lug outsole. I work in an environment where there's a lot of dirt and wet surfaces, and these boots really helped me stay grounded, literally. The full-length Micro G foam midsole added a level of cushioning that made my long hours on the job much more comfortable. However, there was one downside – one that I couldn't help but notice after a while. The boots wore down more quickly than I expected, given their price point. But that's a minor issue when you consider the overall level of comfort and support these boots offer. In the end, the Under Armour Coyote Micro G Valsetz Mid Tactical Boots earned a spot in my everyday rotation. They're like a reliable companion on those long, challenging days at work. Highly recommended for anyone who spends a lot of time on their feet. 🔗Under Armour Military Boots: Lightweight Tactical Footwear with Enhanced Comfort and Tractionhttps://preview.redd.it/gmlkcaksx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=811bb34d44fa41340675c3f1e66e598eac68ff0e The Under Armour Men's Micro G Valsetz Tactical Boots are an excellent addition to any tactical gear collection. With their lightweight synthetic leather and textile upper, these boots are both durable and breathable, making them the perfect choice for those long days on the job. The welded forefoot overlay and molded TPU toe cap provide added protection, ensuring your feet are secure and well-protected at all times. The easy on/off features of these boots, with pull loops on the heel and tongue, make them a breeze to slip on and off, even after a long day on your feet. The anti-fatigue and anti-microbial molded Contoura Support footbed provides all-day comfort, absorbing shock and keeping your feet feeling great even after hours of use. The upgraded outsole, with its durable oil and slip-resistant rubber compound, ensures that you have the traction you need to stay on your feet, even in the most challenging of environments. The full-length Micro G foam midsole provides the ultimate in responsive cushioning, making these boots a standout choice for those who spend their days on their feet. While the Under Armour Men's Micro G Valsetz Tactical Boots have many positives, there are a few drawbacks to consider. Some users have experienced issues with the laces, which can loosen and come untied easily, requiring frequent adjustments. Additionally, the boots are not waterproof, so they may not be the best choice for those working in wet environments. Overall, the Under Armour Men's Micro G Valsetz Tactical Boots are a strong choice for anyone looking for a lightweight, comfortable, and protective work boot. With their durable construction, breathable materials, and excellent traction, these boots are well worth considering as part of your tactical gear collection. Buyer's GuideAdidas military boots are designed to provide comfort, durability, and style in various outdoor conditions. This guide will help you understand the essential features and considerations before purchasing a pair of Adidas military boots. https://preview.redd.it/ix19xwqtx34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=99125785914c60b4f96b7581973b72c02cc57da8 Material and ConstructionAdidas military boots come in various materials such as leather, synthetic materials, and canvas. The choice of material depends on the level of water resistance, breathability, and strength required for the intended use.Water ResistanceWater resistance is essential for military boots, especially if they are meant for outdoor activities in wet or muddy conditions. Look for boots with a water-resistant coating or membrane that will keep your feet dry. https://preview.redd.it/5rye642ux34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=baa5385a5cf47d7b0def84dd9a584e02ad7e8873 Comfort and FitAdidas military boots should provide adequate support and comfort, especially for prolonged use. Check the boot's interior for cushioning, arch support, and breathability. The fit should be snug, but not too tight, allowing for some wiggle room in the toe area and enough room around the ankle.Traction and GripTraction and grip are essential for outdoor activities, such as hiking or camping. Look for Adidas military boots with a non-slip sole and good grip, especially if you plan to use them on wet or uneven terrains. https://preview.redd.it/sk9xq7fux34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c1de79c677b4752ea94000605fdfe5f6e0bf84f0 Ease of Cleaning and MaintenanceMilitary boots need to be durable and easy to clean, especially when used in muddy or dirty conditions. Look for Adidas boots with features like a removable footbed for easy cleaning and waterproof materials that can quickly dry after getting wet.Brand ReputationAdidas is a well-renowned brand known for its durable and high-quality products. When considering purchasing Adidas military boots, always choose a reputable dealer to ensure you get an authentic and high-quality product.Adidas military boots are a great option for those seeking comfort, durability, and style in their outdoor gear. To ensure you're getting the best fit and features for your intended use, always consider the material, water resistance, comfort, traction, ease of cleaning, and brand reputation before making a purchase. https://preview.redd.it/b2yumfrux34d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7fc5b58bf7b9e6fce482c3d4824d62a62e5cb5bc FAQAre Adidas Military Boots suitable for outdoor activities?Yes, Adidas Military Boots are designed for outdoor activities. They feature water-resistant materials, reinforced stitching, and a durable sole that provides excellent grip on various terrains. Their design allows for comfortable wear during long walks and hikes.What are the primary features of Adidas Military Boots?The primary features of Adidas Military Boots include:
What sizes do Adidas Military Boots come in?Adidas Military Boots are available in various sizes, from men's and women's EU sizes 36-48, to ensure a proper fit for a wide range of customers.How do I care for Adidas Military Boots to prolong their lifespan?To prolong the lifespan of Adidas Military Boots, follow these care instructions:
Can I wear Adidas Military Boots for more than just outdoor activities?Yes, Adidas Military Boots can also be worn as fashion statement footwear. They make a great addition to casual outfits, offering both durability and style.As an Amazon™ Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. |
2024.06.02 08:41 flubb98 Toxic parents never change
To preface, I am a 26 year old female, alot of the events that I'm going to talk about occurred when I was a child, some will be more recent, but as I keep low to no contact with my parents now, there wouldn't be much to tell.
As far back as I can remember, my mom would say and do things that made me feel like I wasn't as important as my brother(s). Before my younger brother (22M) was born, if my older brother (29M) broke or damaged something, he'd blame it on me. She always believed him. Sometimes he'd pinch himself, run to our mom crying and say that I pinched him for no reason and I'd end up getting punished. If he wanted to use the PS1 (for those who remember that) and I was using it, I'd be forced to get off so he could have a turn, regardless of how little time I had been using it. The same applied to the family computer. Anything he wanted, he got.
After my little brother came into the picture I assumed my older brother would be forced to share the game systems, computer, toys etc. But I was mistaken. Instead, my mom began to spoil them both, giving them whatever they asked for. Citing their recent autism diagnosis as the reason for the special treatment. "You're the only normal one, you have to compromise on these things for your brothers because they're special." "You have to be mature and responsible because they can't." Were essentially the messages I was fed for years.
I was often the one left in charge if my parents went out, not my older brother. If I wasn't in charge, they would have our oldest brother, (32M) who was adopted by our maternal grandparents, my mom's parents, watch us. Unfortunately, he was also spoiled rotten, but by my grandparents in an attempt to make up for the fact that my mom didn't raise him. Which only fueled my older brother's need for the latest and greatest toys/games at the time. So they got into arguments all the time and I'd end up being the mediatoone in charge regardless. I always had to keep a close eye on my little brother regardless of who was left in charge also, he's not as self sufficient as my older brother and lacked the understanding that most kids his age had, so he needed constant supervision or else he'd end up getting hurt. Which happened a few times, but surprisingly only while my parents were the ones watching him.
When I was 10, my dad lost his job after a seizure (he's an epileptic) caused him to slam his face into a coffee table. He wasn't able to immediately return to work due to the damage, and was fired as a result. We were then evicted from our apartment and were forced to move in with my maternal grandmother. My grandfather had passed a few years prior so it was just her, my uncle and my oldest brother living in the house at the time. My grandmother didn't want us there, to put it simply. My uncle is the one who kept bothering her about how my mom was going to lose custody of us if we didn't have somewhere to go, and she eventually caved. But she wasn't discreet about how little she enjoyed having us there.
At 13, we were still living with my grandmother, my dad had gotten a new job and I finally got a cell phone. Not my own, but my Dad shared his with me after he'd get off work. So from the hours of 4pm to 10pm, I was a regular teen with a phone, which felt nice. One day, I had to text a friend about something related to school, so I asked my mom if I could borrow her phone to text this friend. As I was getting the info on the assignment that I needed, a text came across the screen. It was from my mom's ex Jay. Jay was the father of my two older brothers, (29M & 32M) he was also physically abusive towards my mom when they were together. I admit I shouldn't have gone through her messages, but as far as our entire family was aware, Jay wanted nothing to do with my mom or my brothers, so I was curious as to why/how my mom had his number saved, let alone why they were speaking. To my horror, my mom was flirting with and sending very explicitly worded messages about how much she wanted him and how terrible my dad was. I'll admit, neither of my parents were perfect, my mom had her favoritism of my brothers, while my dad was verbally and physically abusive towards me and my older brother, but never my little brother. My dad also cheated on my mom with a coworker shortly after I was born. Which my mom made common knowledge to us kids by the time I was 7. So our relationship as a family, was tumultuous to say the least. Nevertheless, I brought the texts to my dad, who then confronted my mom. I mean, I was a kid, I had no idea how to navigate that. So I brought it to an adult, as I thought I was supposed to. But boy, I had no idea that things would turn they way they did. My mom essentially told my dad, who barely understands technology, that the texts he thought she sent, her ex sent and that I was just trying to break them up because I hate her. He believed her. This affected me for years because she'd always use it as leverage to accuse me of lying. "Well you lied about those texts, so obviously you'd lie about this too!" I was branded a liar and to this day, despite her admitting that she was lying back then, everyone in my family just sees me as a melodramatic liar and I've come to accept that will probably never change.
At 14, one of my best friends died in a train accident. I wasn't allowed to go to his funeral because my parents had booked a vacation to see my dad's family. My parents knew that telling me no before we left would result in me sneaking out and going to the funeral anyway, so they lied to me, saying that they'd think about it and let me know in the morning before we'd leave, saying it with that tone they use when you know they're going to say yes just to make me think I'd be able to go to the funeral and avoid having to look for me. They've admitted to all of this which is even more chilling to me. The next morning, they'd already packed my luggage in the car by the time I had woken up. My dad sat down and told me in no uncertain terms that I was not going to the funeral and that I was going with them, regardless of what I thought or did. I kicked, screamed, cried, bit, everything I could possibly do to get my dad to put me down. But in the end he turned on the child safety locks and he threw me in the car with my younger brother, we left and spent 3 days with my dad's family. All the while I was made fun of and mocked for crying constantly on what was "supposed to be" a happy vacation according to my parents. My older brother didn't want to go, so he didn't have to. But apparently that only applied to him. To this day I still haven't forgiven them for that.
At 15, I was kicked out of my grandmothers house, and only my dad was against it. But in the end, I had to go live with my boyfriend because I had nowhere else to go and nothing my dad said changed the minds of my mom or grandmother. Until I turned 18, my mom would get me $100 in groceries a month, to keep me alive. (I think she was just afraid I'd report her for abandonment if she didn't atleast feed me) Even then, she would say that she couldn't afford the $100 sometimes and I'd have to get a month of food out of $50 or less.
At 18, I became pregnant. My dad was very unhappy. I had my first born and I thought we were on the road to mending our relationship.
At 21, my parents invited me and my child to their house for dinner, they also invited my boyfriend but he was unable to join us because he was tired from work, but these dinners had become a regular occurrence at this point. Unfortunately, my older brother (29M) still lives at home with them and my younger brother, so I was forced to interact with him. He ended up saying something like "Mom and Dad only put up with you because they want to see your kid." It struck a nerve with me, because it had already felt that way to me for awhile, and my parents were right there, but didn't deny what he said and I started to cry. I excused myself outside but I wasn't calming down.
For some context, back when I lived at my grandmother's house, I had regular breakdowns. My parents were constantly yelling at me or hitting me for one thing or another. I didn't have a room or a bed back then, I slept on the couch in the living room from the ages of 10-15. So when my dad would go off, he'd repeatedly slam me down into whatever surface was in the room if I tried to get up or leave the room we were in. So the couch if it was the living room, my parents bed if we were arguing in their room, etc. My mom never stopped this. Sometimes it would go on for hours, and it'd get to the point where I'd either freak out and get physical with my dad or I would start to rip out my hair and beg him to leave me alone. I was regularly laughed at by my mom or older brother and called dramatic for reacting that way during these screaming sessions.
But in that moment l, as I was crying outside, I felt like that kid again. I was small and meaningless. I wanted to go home. So I collected myself as best I could and walked inside, grabbing my son as I walked up to my parents at the dining table. I told my mom that I was sorry, but we're going home. She got as far as saying, "But we're about to have di- ." before my dad began to scream at me like I had never heard him scream before. My mom took my son into another room as soon as she saw that I was caught off guard by my dad's outburst, and locked him in my uncles bedroom. For over an hour my dad berrated me, as I could hear my son wailing for me from the other room. He kept pushing me and getting in my face, not letting me leave the dining room, he almost slapped me but for whatever reason, didn't. My mom and older brother, just like when I was a kid, stood there and laughed at my reactions. Eventually, he stopped because I said something that made him really mad, so he charged outside and left. My uncle came out of his room with my son soon after and he drove us home. I sent them a long message afterwards stating that I'm going no contact. That lasted about three years, and we've since reconnected in the past 2 years, my dad hasn't pulled anything like that, seemingly because he knows I'm serious when I say I will never speak to them again. My mom on the other hand is back on the "she's out to get me" "she hates me" train again. Anytime I ask her something, even simple yes or no questions, she sends me a novel detailing her yes or no answer. If she's saying no, she always phrases things like I'm this unhinged person who goes crazy over being told no and that she's just an innocent victim to my rage? Which is funny because regardless of what her answer is my response is always "Okay." Or "Okay, thank you." And any question is prefaced heavily with "You really don't have to if you don't want to." "It's totally fine if you cant." "It's fine if you say no, I can figure out something else if need be." I don't want to be a burden and I don't like exerting more energy than absolutely necessary, so I have no reason to try to argue with her. It's gotten to the point where we have so little contact, she has to blow up small misunderstandings that happen when we do converse. My uncle sent me a screenshot from my mom to him, which was her saying I needed to do something, I honestly don't remember what. But whatever it was, apparently my dad and my uncle were the ones who wanted me to know that, not her. Which honestly doesn't matter either way to me. But I guess she took whatever I said in response as an attack despite only saying okay or alright as a response, and I had to deal with her and my dad spamming my phone in the middle of the night trying to make this literal non issue, an issue. So I ended up replying that I have no idea why or how this had devolved into what it did, but I have nothing to do with this, and to stop messaging me about it. Surprisingly they did. Finally the most recent thing was that I had talked to my parents, in front of everyone at their house, including my boyfriend and our kids. I told them I wanted to start looking for a job and was wondering if they'd be willing to watch my now two kids for a couple of hours on some of the days that I work, just until we save enough for the down payment at a daycare for them. My main driver for this was that my mom and dad had been pushing for my kids to stay ovespend time with them so i figured if we could do that while I also work that'd really help. Nowhere in my mind do I think I am entitled to my parents help, I just thought that if they were pushing to spend time with them, that this was a perfect opportunity to do so. My parents agreed initially, but when I called them to make plans about it because I had an interview lined up, my mom said she never agreed to anything like that and that she "wasn't going to raise my kids for me." In the end, it wasn't worth an argument and I just said that she could have just said no the first time I brought it up, and I would have just started looking at alternatives for childcare. Pulling this hurtful stunt was unnecessary and cruel. And we haven't spoken much since.
Honestly I doubt they'll ever actually change, which is why I keep them at an arms length. Sorry for the rant, I just needed somewhere to put all of this.
submitted by flubb98 to toxicparents [link] [comments]
As far back as I can remember, my mom would say and do things that made me feel like I wasn't as important as my brother(s). Before my younger brother (22M) was born, if my older brother (29M) broke or damaged something, he'd blame it on me. She always believed him. Sometimes he'd pinch himself, run to our mom crying and say that I pinched him for no reason and I'd end up getting punished. If he wanted to use the PS1 (for those who remember that) and I was using it, I'd be forced to get off so he could have a turn, regardless of how little time I had been using it. The same applied to the family computer. Anything he wanted, he got.
After my little brother came into the picture I assumed my older brother would be forced to share the game systems, computer, toys etc. But I was mistaken. Instead, my mom began to spoil them both, giving them whatever they asked for. Citing their recent autism diagnosis as the reason for the special treatment. "You're the only normal one, you have to compromise on these things for your brothers because they're special." "You have to be mature and responsible because they can't." Were essentially the messages I was fed for years.
I was often the one left in charge if my parents went out, not my older brother. If I wasn't in charge, they would have our oldest brother, (32M) who was adopted by our maternal grandparents, my mom's parents, watch us. Unfortunately, he was also spoiled rotten, but by my grandparents in an attempt to make up for the fact that my mom didn't raise him. Which only fueled my older brother's need for the latest and greatest toys/games at the time. So they got into arguments all the time and I'd end up being the mediatoone in charge regardless. I always had to keep a close eye on my little brother regardless of who was left in charge also, he's not as self sufficient as my older brother and lacked the understanding that most kids his age had, so he needed constant supervision or else he'd end up getting hurt. Which happened a few times, but surprisingly only while my parents were the ones watching him.
When I was 10, my dad lost his job after a seizure (he's an epileptic) caused him to slam his face into a coffee table. He wasn't able to immediately return to work due to the damage, and was fired as a result. We were then evicted from our apartment and were forced to move in with my maternal grandmother. My grandfather had passed a few years prior so it was just her, my uncle and my oldest brother living in the house at the time. My grandmother didn't want us there, to put it simply. My uncle is the one who kept bothering her about how my mom was going to lose custody of us if we didn't have somewhere to go, and she eventually caved. But she wasn't discreet about how little she enjoyed having us there.
At 13, we were still living with my grandmother, my dad had gotten a new job and I finally got a cell phone. Not my own, but my Dad shared his with me after he'd get off work. So from the hours of 4pm to 10pm, I was a regular teen with a phone, which felt nice. One day, I had to text a friend about something related to school, so I asked my mom if I could borrow her phone to text this friend. As I was getting the info on the assignment that I needed, a text came across the screen. It was from my mom's ex Jay. Jay was the father of my two older brothers, (29M & 32M) he was also physically abusive towards my mom when they were together. I admit I shouldn't have gone through her messages, but as far as our entire family was aware, Jay wanted nothing to do with my mom or my brothers, so I was curious as to why/how my mom had his number saved, let alone why they were speaking. To my horror, my mom was flirting with and sending very explicitly worded messages about how much she wanted him and how terrible my dad was. I'll admit, neither of my parents were perfect, my mom had her favoritism of my brothers, while my dad was verbally and physically abusive towards me and my older brother, but never my little brother. My dad also cheated on my mom with a coworker shortly after I was born. Which my mom made common knowledge to us kids by the time I was 7. So our relationship as a family, was tumultuous to say the least. Nevertheless, I brought the texts to my dad, who then confronted my mom. I mean, I was a kid, I had no idea how to navigate that. So I brought it to an adult, as I thought I was supposed to. But boy, I had no idea that things would turn they way they did. My mom essentially told my dad, who barely understands technology, that the texts he thought she sent, her ex sent and that I was just trying to break them up because I hate her. He believed her. This affected me for years because she'd always use it as leverage to accuse me of lying. "Well you lied about those texts, so obviously you'd lie about this too!" I was branded a liar and to this day, despite her admitting that she was lying back then, everyone in my family just sees me as a melodramatic liar and I've come to accept that will probably never change.
At 14, one of my best friends died in a train accident. I wasn't allowed to go to his funeral because my parents had booked a vacation to see my dad's family. My parents knew that telling me no before we left would result in me sneaking out and going to the funeral anyway, so they lied to me, saying that they'd think about it and let me know in the morning before we'd leave, saying it with that tone they use when you know they're going to say yes just to make me think I'd be able to go to the funeral and avoid having to look for me. They've admitted to all of this which is even more chilling to me. The next morning, they'd already packed my luggage in the car by the time I had woken up. My dad sat down and told me in no uncertain terms that I was not going to the funeral and that I was going with them, regardless of what I thought or did. I kicked, screamed, cried, bit, everything I could possibly do to get my dad to put me down. But in the end he turned on the child safety locks and he threw me in the car with my younger brother, we left and spent 3 days with my dad's family. All the while I was made fun of and mocked for crying constantly on what was "supposed to be" a happy vacation according to my parents. My older brother didn't want to go, so he didn't have to. But apparently that only applied to him. To this day I still haven't forgiven them for that.
At 15, I was kicked out of my grandmothers house, and only my dad was against it. But in the end, I had to go live with my boyfriend because I had nowhere else to go and nothing my dad said changed the minds of my mom or grandmother. Until I turned 18, my mom would get me $100 in groceries a month, to keep me alive. (I think she was just afraid I'd report her for abandonment if she didn't atleast feed me) Even then, she would say that she couldn't afford the $100 sometimes and I'd have to get a month of food out of $50 or less.
At 18, I became pregnant. My dad was very unhappy. I had my first born and I thought we were on the road to mending our relationship.
At 21, my parents invited me and my child to their house for dinner, they also invited my boyfriend but he was unable to join us because he was tired from work, but these dinners had become a regular occurrence at this point. Unfortunately, my older brother (29M) still lives at home with them and my younger brother, so I was forced to interact with him. He ended up saying something like "Mom and Dad only put up with you because they want to see your kid." It struck a nerve with me, because it had already felt that way to me for awhile, and my parents were right there, but didn't deny what he said and I started to cry. I excused myself outside but I wasn't calming down.
For some context, back when I lived at my grandmother's house, I had regular breakdowns. My parents were constantly yelling at me or hitting me for one thing or another. I didn't have a room or a bed back then, I slept on the couch in the living room from the ages of 10-15. So when my dad would go off, he'd repeatedly slam me down into whatever surface was in the room if I tried to get up or leave the room we were in. So the couch if it was the living room, my parents bed if we were arguing in their room, etc. My mom never stopped this. Sometimes it would go on for hours, and it'd get to the point where I'd either freak out and get physical with my dad or I would start to rip out my hair and beg him to leave me alone. I was regularly laughed at by my mom or older brother and called dramatic for reacting that way during these screaming sessions.
But in that moment l, as I was crying outside, I felt like that kid again. I was small and meaningless. I wanted to go home. So I collected myself as best I could and walked inside, grabbing my son as I walked up to my parents at the dining table. I told my mom that I was sorry, but we're going home. She got as far as saying, "But we're about to have di- ." before my dad began to scream at me like I had never heard him scream before. My mom took my son into another room as soon as she saw that I was caught off guard by my dad's outburst, and locked him in my uncles bedroom. For over an hour my dad berrated me, as I could hear my son wailing for me from the other room. He kept pushing me and getting in my face, not letting me leave the dining room, he almost slapped me but for whatever reason, didn't. My mom and older brother, just like when I was a kid, stood there and laughed at my reactions. Eventually, he stopped because I said something that made him really mad, so he charged outside and left. My uncle came out of his room with my son soon after and he drove us home. I sent them a long message afterwards stating that I'm going no contact. That lasted about three years, and we've since reconnected in the past 2 years, my dad hasn't pulled anything like that, seemingly because he knows I'm serious when I say I will never speak to them again. My mom on the other hand is back on the "she's out to get me" "she hates me" train again. Anytime I ask her something, even simple yes or no questions, she sends me a novel detailing her yes or no answer. If she's saying no, she always phrases things like I'm this unhinged person who goes crazy over being told no and that she's just an innocent victim to my rage? Which is funny because regardless of what her answer is my response is always "Okay." Or "Okay, thank you." And any question is prefaced heavily with "You really don't have to if you don't want to." "It's totally fine if you cant." "It's fine if you say no, I can figure out something else if need be." I don't want to be a burden and I don't like exerting more energy than absolutely necessary, so I have no reason to try to argue with her. It's gotten to the point where we have so little contact, she has to blow up small misunderstandings that happen when we do converse. My uncle sent me a screenshot from my mom to him, which was her saying I needed to do something, I honestly don't remember what. But whatever it was, apparently my dad and my uncle were the ones who wanted me to know that, not her. Which honestly doesn't matter either way to me. But I guess she took whatever I said in response as an attack despite only saying okay or alright as a response, and I had to deal with her and my dad spamming my phone in the middle of the night trying to make this literal non issue, an issue. So I ended up replying that I have no idea why or how this had devolved into what it did, but I have nothing to do with this, and to stop messaging me about it. Surprisingly they did. Finally the most recent thing was that I had talked to my parents, in front of everyone at their house, including my boyfriend and our kids. I told them I wanted to start looking for a job and was wondering if they'd be willing to watch my now two kids for a couple of hours on some of the days that I work, just until we save enough for the down payment at a daycare for them. My main driver for this was that my mom and dad had been pushing for my kids to stay ovespend time with them so i figured if we could do that while I also work that'd really help. Nowhere in my mind do I think I am entitled to my parents help, I just thought that if they were pushing to spend time with them, that this was a perfect opportunity to do so. My parents agreed initially, but when I called them to make plans about it because I had an interview lined up, my mom said she never agreed to anything like that and that she "wasn't going to raise my kids for me." In the end, it wasn't worth an argument and I just said that she could have just said no the first time I brought it up, and I would have just started looking at alternatives for childcare. Pulling this hurtful stunt was unnecessary and cruel. And we haven't spoken much since.
Honestly I doubt they'll ever actually change, which is why I keep them at an arms length. Sorry for the rant, I just needed somewhere to put all of this.
2024.06.02 08:24 vex_the_dm (m4F) finding the red string
Brief: Hey there, I’m Vex. In short, I’m a retired Marine vet with a hyper brain, seeking a female partner
About Me:
Take in that deep breath, not the one for oxygen, but the one that reassures you that you are still alive.
If you think we’d make a great team, please reach out with:
submitted by vex_the_dm to Roleplay [link] [comments]
About Me:
- Age/Gender: 26, Male
- Background: Retired Marine vet
- Experience: I own my own DnD company and have extensive experience in creating characters, worlds, and timelines. RP has been a significant part of my life and has helped me through tough times.
- Interests: I love diving deep into biology and other sciences to create creatures and races that feel realistic yet fantastical. I enjoy deep roleplay, falling in love with characters, and weaving stories together.
- Therapy: I attend therapy sessions weekly and have undergone various treatments, continuing to work on my mental and personal growth.
- Head Damage: I suffered head damage in the Marines that didn’t affect me externally but impacted parts of my brain More can be explained for better understanding.
- Location: United States, Washington State (Pacific Time Zone)
- Availability: Pretty much all the time unless working, which varies.
- Platform: Discord
- Partner Traits: I need a woman who has the patience and a forgiving heart to understand my hyper nature. Someone who is caring on my good days and supportive on my bad ones.
- Passion for Creation: You should be passionate about creating characters, worlds, and storylines, and willing to explore deep concepts like biology, how when and where.
- Communication: Open and willing to dive deep into things
- RP Style: I love original content and weaving intricate worlds together. If you share a passion for unique, immersive storytelling and can bring energy and creativity to our RP, we’ll get along great.
- Genre Preferences: Fantasy, sci-fi, modern – I love exploring different genres with rich, original content.
- Character Dynamics: Enjoys character relationships that are complex and dynamic.
- Plot Development: Collaborative planning, improvisation, and long-term arcs are all welcome.
Take in that deep breath, not the one for oxygen, but the one that reassures you that you are still alive.
If you think we’d make a great team, please reach out with:
- A brief introduction about yourself
- Your RP experience and preferences
- Any plot ideas or character concepts you have in mind
- You have read and understood what i am asking
2024.06.02 08:19 RichardNixonTheGoat Why does the VA not seem to care about mental health treatment plans
Ok this is gonna be sort of a rant so bare with me, I am diagnosed with PTSD and one of the things VA has me do is therapy. Well I go to talk to a therapist slowly and slowly building a relationship with them and then the 12 weeks is up and it’s time for me to try something new! I can’t go back to the same provider even though I literally was just starting to build trust with him?! NOPE my coordinator says you need to take a 3 month break from mental health treatment and essentially told me to go F myself. I have found out I can’t hold a job whatsoever wether it be I lose my temper or what have you I have issues with that which never frickin existed before all this shit, hell I frickin struggle going to family gatherings let alone being in public places working. Im not trying to be in the mental health care forever, I just need a little help so I can actually get my health together Because right now the va is screwing me over with this 12 week rule where I barely even get to know the person I need longer I’m not going to tell some random ass dude I’ve only known for a couple weeks shit that I literally don’t even tell my SO. I just need help from them so I can get back to being normal because this shit is terrible. I’m trying so damn hard to just get through this but I feel like genuinely no one actually cares about me and just want to push me aside for the next guy who’s going through this same cycle. I genuinely just want to get the help I need so I can be done with this and move on with my life. I don’t know if anyone has gone through this before but please tell me what I need to do and how I can get through this. Thank you.
submitted by RichardNixonTheGoat to VeteransBenefits [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 08:07 FAOLAN131313 Best way to tackle my debt?
So I have $21k in credit card debt, only $2k no intrest the rest 22%-26%, except one 29% almost paid. $17k in a private student loan 5% interest and then ~$20k federal loans that have a $0 payment in the SAVE plan currently and going to attempt PSLF so I'm mostly focusing on the how to take credit cards. Probably going to have too much info but want it to be comprehensive to show why I feel so very stuck.
Already budgetting and don't have a lot of extra to takle them, keep getting told to stop paying the private loan but it is cosigned and I am not ruining their credit, but it is $430 a month due to a 5 year loan term. Also that bankruptcy may be the best solution but it messes up your credit for so long and I will need to move soon so I like the idea in theory but ramifications seem too high... but without it I feel like I'll be stuck forever.
Looked into consolidation loans with no offer lower than 28% so that's a nope. Can't get another balance transfer card either. Can't work more hours due to multiple disabilities and honesty struggling with this full time job I recently got, but am going to have to keep it to survive all this (and since part timers get no benefits). Also for those who look into my history I know I should, but I will not get rid of my dog. He is keeping me sane and alive even if he needs lifelong treatment and I am also afraid if I rehomed him the next people would not pay for his treatment which would end his life so prematurely.
submitted by FAOLAN131313 to CRedit [link] [comments]
Already budgetting and don't have a lot of extra to takle them, keep getting told to stop paying the private loan but it is cosigned and I am not ruining their credit, but it is $430 a month due to a 5 year loan term. Also that bankruptcy may be the best solution but it messes up your credit for so long and I will need to move soon so I like the idea in theory but ramifications seem too high... but without it I feel like I'll be stuck forever.
Looked into consolidation loans with no offer lower than 28% so that's a nope. Can't get another balance transfer card either. Can't work more hours due to multiple disabilities and honesty struggling with this full time job I recently got, but am going to have to keep it to survive all this (and since part timers get no benefits). Also for those who look into my history I know I should, but I will not get rid of my dog. He is keeping me sane and alive even if he needs lifelong treatment and I am also afraid if I rehomed him the next people would not pay for his treatment which would end his life so prematurely.
2024.06.02 08:05 lamroN_dnoyeB What is the prognosis for a cat with Pleural Effusion?
Last year I suddenly lost my two year old kitty to Pleural Effusion. His health declined rapidly over the course of two weeks and he went into respiratory distress by the time I got him to the hospital. It turned out he had blood and puss surrounding his lungs. The Veterinarian and Technicians at the hospital I brought him to told me the procedure to tap his chest was very expensive and there was a high chance he wouldn’t survive afterwards as he likely had cancer or congestive heart failure. They suggested that I euthanize him there, and I agreed.
His death has lingered heavily on my mind since then so I turned to the internet to do some research on Pleural Effusion and the outcomes of other cats with the illness. Many were euthanized or died right after the procedure, but some survived. I’m posting to ask if there are any vets here who have had or heard of patients with pleural effusion and what happened to them. I’m curious about what their treatment plan looked like and if they were able to thrive afterwards.
submitted by lamroN_dnoyeB to AskVet [link] [comments]
His death has lingered heavily on my mind since then so I turned to the internet to do some research on Pleural Effusion and the outcomes of other cats with the illness. Many were euthanized or died right after the procedure, but some survived. I’m posting to ask if there are any vets here who have had or heard of patients with pleural effusion and what happened to them. I’m curious about what their treatment plan looked like and if they were able to thrive afterwards.
2024.06.02 07:54 Embarrassed-Pear589 I'm working on a hunter x hunter themed ttrpg system and wondering what others think about it (super long)
So this originally started as an idea to use chat gpt to run a DND 5e campaign for me to use to test different character builds, then I started to wonder if I could incorporate hunter x hunter into the game. Using a really really long chat gpt prompt I wrote it actually ended up going really well so I decided to try to make it an entire system that you could kinda hopefully incorporate into any version of DND or other ttrpgs to have your own personalized hunter x hunter campaign. Now this whole thing is really messy but that's just because it's easier for my weird brain to work with. Anyway here's what I have so far 1. Primary Race: Human - The primary race is human, reflecting the "Hunter x Hunter" universe. However, players can customize their characters with unique physical traits or abilities, reflecting the diverse range of human appearances in the series.
Merging the power system and world of "Hunter x Hunter" with the fundamentals of Dungeons & Dragons (D&D) 5th Edition could create a unique and exciting tabletop RPG experience. Here's a basic framework for how it could be done:
Enhanced Speed- Choosing to put 1 or more AP into speed will grant +5 movement speed, +1 to attack bonus, and +1 to AC for every two AP, because enhancing speed is much more difficult and usually only one who's ability allows for it can enhance their speed efficiently.
Enhancing such abilities uses AP but does not deplete it. tho prolonged use of aura will cause it to weaken over time. through training this can be overcome.
In "Hunter x Hunter," each Nen user has an affinity for one of six Nen types: Enhancer, Emitter, Manipulator, Transmuter, Conjurer, and Specialist. We can assign a key ability score to each Nen type for calculating Aura Points (AP) and other Nen-related mechanics. Here's a suggested assignment:
Removing traditional spellcasting and replacing it with a Nen-based system is a significant change that can fully integrate the unique aspects of "Hunter x Hunter" into your D&D game. Here's how you can adapt the Aura Point (AP) system to completely replace spellcasting:
2. Nen Ability Categories - Classify Nen abilities into tiers, similar to spell levels: Basic, Intermediate, Advanced, and Master. - The AP cost for using an ability depends on its tier: Basic (1-2 AP), Intermediate (3-5 AP), Advanced (6-8 AP), Master (9-12 AP).
3. Learning and Developing Nen Abilities - Characters learn new Nen abilities as they level up. The number and tier of abilities they can learn and use are based on their level and key ability score. - Characters can also develop custom Nen abilities in consultation with the DM, tailored to their character's development and story.
4. Aura Point Recovery - AP is fully restored after a long rest. Half of the maximum AP is restored after a short rest. - Certain items or actions in-game could also restore AP.
5. Overexertion Risks - Using more AP than the maximum can lead to overexertion, causing fatigue, reduction in maximum hit points, or other penalties. - Severe overexertion could lead to more drastic consequences, like temporary loss of Nen abilities.
6. Nen Training and Advancement - Include quests or training sessions for characters to increase their AP maximum, reduce Nen ability costs, or learn new abilities. - This system allows for character growth and the pursuit of mastery over Nen.
7. Nen-Based Defense and Attacks - Allow characters to use AP to enhance physical attacks, defense, or to perform feats like enhanced jumps, bursts of speed, etc.
8. Balancing Nen Abilities - The DM should ensure Nen abilities are balanced within the game, avoiding overpowered combinations. - Regular feedback and adjustments may be necessary based on gameplay experience.
With this revised system, Nen becomes the central mechanic for all supernatural and extraordinary abilities in the game, deeply immersing players in the "Hunter x Hunter" universe while maintaining the strategic and role-playing elements of D&D. This approach requires careful planning and balance but offers a unique and engaging gameplay experience. for the HUNTER class, the features include
Creating detailed class features and proficiencies for each Hunter class and its subclasses in a D&D 5e format requires a comprehensive approach. I'll provide a basic outline for the "Hunter" class and one subclass, the "Beast Hunter," as an example. You can use this format as a template to develop other subclasses.
Proficiencies - Armor: Light armor, medium armor - Weapons: Simple weapons, martial weapons - Tools: None - Saving Throws: Dexterity, Intelligence - Skills: Choose two from Acrobatics, Survival, Investigation, Nature, Perception, Stealth
Equipment - (a) a longbow and 20 arrows or (b) any simple weapon - (a) a dungeoneer's pack or (b) an explorer's pack - Leather armor, a hunter's token, and a dagger
Features
Let's define each feature of the Hunter class in the context of a "Hunter x Hunter" and D&D 5e hybrid game:
Each subclass within the Hunter class would have similar structure, with unique abilities and features tailored to their specialization, such as Sea Hunter, Gourmet Hunter, etc. This approach keeps the balance and progression familiar to D&D 5e while integrating the unique elements of the "Hunter x Hunter" universe.
Level 6: Primal Communication - Ability to communicate on a basic level with beasts and understand their intentions and emotions.
Level 10: Beast Companion - Bond with a beast you encounter, which becomes your faithful companion. - Use the Ranger's Companion feature from the Ranger class as a reference for rules and stats.
Level 14: Predator's Instinct - Gain advantage on initiative rolls in natural environments. - Can't be surprised by beast-type creatures.
Level 18: Master of Beasts - Gain the ability to temporarily control or influence the behavior of beasts through Nen.
Level 6: Deep Sea Knowledge - Advantage on Nature and Survival checks related to aquatic environments. - Can identify aquatic creatures and plants and their uses or dangers.
Level 10: Pressure Resistance - Gain resistance to cold damage and ignore the effects of deep and cold water pressure.
Level 14: Master Navigator - Can never be lost at sea. Gain proficiency in Navigation tools. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus.
Level 18: Call of the Depths - Ability to summon and communicate with sea creatures, possibly enlisting their help or guidance.
Level 6: Trap Sense - Gain advantage on saving throws against traps and spells that protect treasures. - Can detect the presence of traps within a 30-foot radius.
Level 10: Dungeon Delver - Move at normal speed while stealthily exploring ruins and dungeons. - Resistance to damage from traps.
Level 14: Ancient Secrets - Can decipher ancient languages and codes. Gain advantage on Intelligence checks related to ancient texts and puzzles.
Level 18: Treasure's Boon - Once per long rest, can locate a significant treasure, artifact, or hidden place within a 10-mile radius.
Level 6: Soothing Melody - Can use music to calm emotions, dispel fear, or inspire courage in others.
Level 10: Sonic Resonance - Gain resistance to thunder damage and charm effects. - Can use music to communicate simple ideas to creatures that don't speak any languages.
Level 14: Echolocation - Through focused listening, can sense the location of objects and creatures in complete darkness within a 60-foot radius.
Level 18: Symphony of Power - Once per long rest, can play a powerful melody that grants temporary hit points, cures one condition, or boosts one ability score for the duration of the performance.
Level 6: Enhanced Taste - Can detect poisons and potions by taste. Gain advantage on saving throws against ingested poisons.
Level 10: Exotic Cuisine - Can prepare meals that grant temporary hit points or other minor benefits.
Level 14: Iron Stomach - Gain immunity to poison and disease from ingested sources.
Level 18: Culinary Masterpiece - Once per long rest, can create a meal that acts as a Greater Restoration spell or provides a significant buff to the party.
Level 6: Interrogation Expert - Gain advantage on Insight and Intimidation checks when interrogating.
Level 10: Criminal Network - Can establish contacts and gather information from criminal sources. Gain advantage on Charisma checks when dealing with criminals.
Level 14: Expert Tracker - Gain the ability to track targets over long distances, even across different terrains.
Level 18: Master of Justice - Once per long rest, can discern the truth of any statement or determine the location of a person or object related to your investigation.
Level 6: Herbalist - Can identify and create medicinal herbs and potions. Gain proficiency in Herbalism Kit.
Level 10: Healer's Touch - Can use a pool of healing points to restore hit points equal to 5 times your Hunter level. As an action, can touch a creature to restore any number of these points.
Level 14: Disease Resistance - Gain immunity to disease and advantage on saving throws against effects that cause illness.
Level 18: Lifesaver - Once per long rest, can perform a healing action that acts as a Resurrection spell without needing material components.
Level 6: Ruins Delver - Gain advantage on saving throws made to avoid or resist traps and natural hazards in ancient ruins and dungeons.
Level 10: Relic Hunter - Can sense the presence of significant historical artifacts within a 1-mile radius.
Level 14: Cryptographer - Gain the ability to decipher ancient codes and languages, and unlock magical inscriptions.
Level 18: Guardian's Favor - Once per long rest, can invoke ancient powers for protection or insight, granting advantage on a series of checks or resisting a powerful magical effect.
Level 6: Codebreaker - Gain advantage on Intelligence checks to intercept and decipher secret messages and codes.
Level 10: Eavesdropper - Gain the ability to listen in on conversations or sounds from great distances or through barriers.
Level 14: Master of Disguise - Can create disguises that allow blending into almost any environment or society. Advantage on checks made to maintain a disguise.
Level 18: Omnipresent Knowledge - Once per long rest, can gain detailed knowledge about a person, place, or object that is not commonly known or easily accessible.
Level 6: Urban Tracker - Adapted to tracking in urban environments, can navigate and gather information in cities efficiently.
Level 10: Sixth Sense - Gain a limited ability to sense the direction of a sought person or object within a 5-mile radius.
Level 14: Path Finder - Can create shortcuts or find the most efficient paths through natural and urban landscapes.
Level 18: Find the Lost - Once per long rest, can locate exactly a lost person or item, regardless of distance or barriers, as long as they are on the same plane of existence.
These subclass features provide specialized skills and abilities that align with the unique roles and expertise of each type of Hunter, allowing for a rich role-playing experience within the "Hunter x Hunter" and D&D 5e hybrid framework. Players can choose a path that best suits their interests and play style, diving deep into the diverse world of "Hunter x Hunter." . If anyone has any suggestions or questions please let me know. Also if you want the full chat gpt prompt you can DM me
submitted by Embarrassed-Pear589 to HatsuVault [link] [comments]
- Alternative Race: Chimera Ant
- As an alternative, players can choose to be a Chimera Ant, which allows for a mix of human and animal traits, offering unique physical and sensory abilities. This race would have its own set of strengths and vulnerabilities.
- Classes
- Hunter: The main class, with sub-classes based on Hunter types (e.g., Beast Hunter, Treasure Hunter).
- Assassin: Focused on stealth and precision, with techniques like those of the Zoldyck family. Sub-classes could be based on different assassination styles or tools.
- Criminal: A class for those who operate outside the law, like the Phantom Troupe, with sub-classes based on criminal expertise (e.g., Thief, Bandit, Mercenary).
Nen System Integration
- Nen Types and Abilities
- Each class develops Nen abilities based on their Nen type, with unique Hatsu abilities.
- Assassins and Criminals might have Nen abilities that complement their class skills (e.g., a Thief might be a Transmuter, changing the properties of their aura to aid in stealth).
- Aura Points (AP)
- This system replaces spell slots. Using Nen abilities consumes AP, which can be restored with rest.
Gameplay Mechanics
- Nen Training and Character Progression
- Character leveling involves improving Nen control and developing Hatsu abilities.
- Combat and Nen Conflicts
- Combat includes standard D&D mechanics and strategic use of Nen.
- Nen-enhanced attacks and defenses: Characters can use AP to enhance physical attacks or bolster defense, adding an extra layer to combat strategy.
- Quests and Adventures
- DMs craft campaigns within the "Hunter x Hunter" world, allowing exploration and interaction with familiar and new elements.
Balancing and Adaptation
- Balancing Races and Classes
- Chimera Ants might have natural advantages (like enhanced senses) but also specific weaknesses (such as susceptibility to certain Nen types).
- Each class and sub-class should offer unique advantages and playstyles without overshadowing others.
- Adapting Nen Abilities
- Nen abilities must be balanced in power and utility, encouraging creative use without making them overpowered.
- Regular player feedback and DM discretion will be essential for maintaining balance.
- Skill and Ability Checks
- Incorporate Nen in skill checks, where appropriate, to allow creative problem-solving using Nen abilities.
Merging the power system and world of "Hunter x Hunter" with the fundamentals of Dungeons & Dragons (D&D) 5th Edition could create a unique and exciting tabletop RPG experience. Here's a basic framework for how it could be done:
Character Creation
- Races and Backgrounds: Stick to D&D's system for races and backgrounds, as these provide rich lore and diversity. However, incorporate elements from the "Hunter x Hunter" world into the backgrounds, allowing players to come from specific regions or organizations within that universe.
- Classes: Replace D&D classes with "Hunter" as the primary class. Sub-classes could be based on the different types of Hunters in "Hunter x Hunter" (like Beast Hunter, Treasure Hunter, Blacklist Hunter, etc.), each with unique skills and quests.
- Ability Scores: Use the standard D&D ability scores (Strength, Dexterity, Constitution, Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma). These will influence the character's physical and mental capabilities as usual.
Nen System Integration
- Nen Types: During character creation, players determine their Nen type (Enhancer, Emitter, Manipulator, Transmuter, Conjurer, Specialist). This could be chosen or determined randomly, as in the series.
- Nen Abilities (Hatsu): Players develop their unique Hatsu abilities, guided by their Nen type. This replaces the magic/spellcasting system of traditional D&D. Balancing these abilities would be key to ensure gameplay remains challenging and engaging.
- Aura Points (AP): Similar to spell slots in D&D, characters have Aura Points. Using Nen abilities consumes AP, which can be restored with rest.
Gameplay Mechanics
- Nen Training and Challenges: Incorporate Nen training into the leveling-up process. As characters level up, they gain more control over their Nen, unlocking new capabilities or strengthening their Hatsu.
- Quests and Storytelling: The DM crafts adventures within the "Hunter x Hunter" universe, allowing players to explore familiar locales and encounter characters from the series, while also introducing original plots.
- Combat and Challenges: Integrate D&D's combat system, but with modifications to incorporate Nen abilities. This includes Aura defense, Nen-enhanced attacks, and strategic use of Hatsu abilities. A nen user may choose to enhance their Attack power, Speed, or defense, by covering their bodies or weapons with aura. Enhanced Attack- Choosing to put 1 or more AP into enhancing attack will grant +2 to damage for each point.
Enhanced Speed- Choosing to put 1 or more AP into speed will grant +5 movement speed, +1 to attack bonus, and +1 to AC for every two AP, because enhancing speed is much more difficult and usually only one who's ability allows for it can enhance their speed efficiently.
Enhancing such abilities uses AP but does not deplete it. tho prolonged use of aura will cause it to weaken over time. through training this can be overcome.
- Nen Conflicts: Introduce Nen battles, which are more about outsmarting opponents with clever use of Nen abilities than just overpowering them.
Balancing and Adaptation
- Balancing Nen Abilities: Ensure that Nen abilities are balanced, allowing for creative use without overpowering characters. This might require regular adjustments and feedback from players.
- Adapting D&D Mechanics: Some standard D&D mechanics might need to be adapted or omitted to fit the "Hunter x Hunter" theme. For instance, traditional spellcasting doesn't fit, so classes that rely heavily on this might need reworking.
In "Hunter x Hunter," each Nen user has an affinity for one of six Nen types: Enhancer, Emitter, Manipulator, Transmuter, Conjurer, and Specialist. We can assign a key ability score to each Nen type for calculating Aura Points (AP) and other Nen-related mechanics. Here's a suggested assignment:
- Enhancer
- Key Ability: Strength or Constitution
- Rationale: Enhancers focus on reinforcing their natural physical abilities, making Strength or Constitution a natural fit.
- Emitter
- Key Ability: Charisma
- Rationale: Emitters project their aura away from their bodies, requiring force of personality, represented by Charisma.
- Manipulator
- Key Ability: Intelligence
- Rationale: Manipulation requires precision and understanding complex systems, aligning well with Intelligence.
- Transmuter
- Key Ability: Dexterity
- Rationale: Transmuters alter the properties of their aura, requiring finesse and control, which Dexterity represents.
- Conjurer
- Key Ability: Wisdom
- Rationale: Conjurers create objects out of their aura, requiring insight and strong mental discipline, qualities associated with Wisdom.
- Specialist
- Key Ability: Wisdom or Charisma
- Rationale: Specialists have unique and varied abilities that don't fit into other categories. Wisdom or Charisma can be chosen based on the nature of the Specialist's unique ability.
Aura Points (AP) Calculation
- AP is calculated using the formula: [Character Level] + [Modifier of Key Ability Score] x 2.
- For instance, a Level 5 Enhancer with a Strength score of 16 (Modifier +3) would have an AP of 5 + (3 x 2) = 11.
Using the Key Ability Score
- The key ability score would also be used for determining the difficulty class (DC) for saving throws against Nen abilities, and for attack rolls when applicable.
- For example, if an Emitter with a Charisma modifier of +2 uses an ability that requires a target to make a saving throw, the DC would be calculated using their Charisma modifier.
Removing traditional spellcasting and replacing it with a Nen-based system is a significant change that can fully integrate the unique aspects of "Hunter x Hunter" into your D&D game. Here's how you can adapt the Aura Point (AP) system to completely replace spellcasting:
Revised Aura Point (AP) System for Nen Abilities
1. Aura Points as the Sole Power Source - All supernatural abilities, including those that would normally be spells in D&D, are now Nen abilities powered by AP. - Characters do not have spell slots but instead use AP to activate and sustain their Nen abilities.2. Nen Ability Categories - Classify Nen abilities into tiers, similar to spell levels: Basic, Intermediate, Advanced, and Master. - The AP cost for using an ability depends on its tier: Basic (1-2 AP), Intermediate (3-5 AP), Advanced (6-8 AP), Master (9-12 AP).
3. Learning and Developing Nen Abilities - Characters learn new Nen abilities as they level up. The number and tier of abilities they can learn and use are based on their level and key ability score. - Characters can also develop custom Nen abilities in consultation with the DM, tailored to their character's development and story.
4. Aura Point Recovery - AP is fully restored after a long rest. Half of the maximum AP is restored after a short rest. - Certain items or actions in-game could also restore AP.
5. Overexertion Risks - Using more AP than the maximum can lead to overexertion, causing fatigue, reduction in maximum hit points, or other penalties. - Severe overexertion could lead to more drastic consequences, like temporary loss of Nen abilities.
6. Nen Training and Advancement - Include quests or training sessions for characters to increase their AP maximum, reduce Nen ability costs, or learn new abilities. - This system allows for character growth and the pursuit of mastery over Nen.
7. Nen-Based Defense and Attacks - Allow characters to use AP to enhance physical attacks, defense, or to perform feats like enhanced jumps, bursts of speed, etc.
8. Balancing Nen Abilities - The DM should ensure Nen abilities are balanced within the game, avoiding overpowered combinations. - Regular feedback and adjustments may be necessary based on gameplay experience.
With this revised system, Nen becomes the central mechanic for all supernatural and extraordinary abilities in the game, deeply immersing players in the "Hunter x Hunter" universe while maintaining the strategic and role-playing elements of D&D. This approach requires careful planning and balance but offers a unique and engaging gameplay experience. for the HUNTER class, the features include
Creating detailed class features and proficiencies for each Hunter class and its subclasses in a D&D 5e format requires a comprehensive approach. I'll provide a basic outline for the "Hunter" class and one subclass, the "Beast Hunter," as an example. You can use this format as a template to develop other subclasses.
Hunter Class (General Features)
Hit Points - Hit Dice: 1d10 per Hunter level - Hit Points at 1st Level: 10 + Constitution modifier - Hit Points at Higher Levels: 1d10 (or 6) + Constitution modifier per Hunter level after 1stProficiencies - Armor: Light armor, medium armor - Weapons: Simple weapons, martial weapons - Tools: None - Saving Throws: Dexterity, Intelligence - Skills: Choose two from Acrobatics, Survival, Investigation, Nature, Perception, Stealth
Equipment - (a) a longbow and 20 arrows or (b) any simple weapon - (a) a dungeoneer's pack or (b) an explorer's pack - Leather armor, a hunter's token, and a dagger
Features
Let's define each feature of the Hunter class in the context of a "Hunter x Hunter" and D&D 5e hybrid game:
Level 1: Nen Sensitivity
- Gain the ability to perceive and vaguely sense aura (Nen) in yourself and others.
- Provides advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks related to detecting Nen use or aura presence.
Level 1: Hunter's Expertise
- Choose two skills from the Hunter skill list. Your proficiency bonus is doubled for any ability check you make that uses either of the chosen skills.
Level 2: Nen Training (Basic Techniques)
- Learn the basic Nen techniques: Ten, Zetsu, and Ren.
- Ten allows you to defend against low-level Nen attacks.
- Zetsu lets you conceal your aura, improving stealth.
- Ren increases your aura output temporarily, enhancing physical abilities for a short time.
Level 3: Hunter Archetype
- Choose a Hunter Archetype, reflecting your specialized training as a Hunter. This choice grants you features at later levels.
Level 3: Nen Ability (Hatsu)
- Develop your unique Nen ability (Hatsu) based on your Nen type. This is a special ability you can use by spending Aura Points (AP).
Level 4: Ability Score Improvement
- Improve one ability score of your choice by 2, or two ability scores of your choice by 1. As normal, you can’t increase an ability score above 20 using this feature.
Level 5: Extra Attack
- You can attack twice, instead of once, whenever you take the Attack action on your turn.
Level 6: Archetype Feature
- Gain a feature granted by your chosen Hunter Archetype.
Level 7: Nen Training (Advanced Techniques)
- Learn advanced Nen techniques that allow for more potent use of your aura, including enhanced versions of Ten, Zetsu, and Ren.
Level 8: Ability Score Improvement
- As with level 4.
Level 9: Indomitable (1 use)
- You can reroll a saving throw that you fail. If you do so, you must use the new roll, and you can’t use this feature again until you finish a long rest.
Level 10: Archetype Feature
- Gain an additional feature from your chosen Hunter Archetype.
Level 11: Improved Nen Ability
- Your Nen ability (Hatsu) becomes more potent or versatile. This could mean lower AP costs, increased effects, or additional options for its use.
Level 12: Ability Score Improvement
- As with level 4.
Level 13: Indomitable (2 uses)
- As with level 9, but you can use this feature twice between long rests.
Level 14: Archetype Feature
- Gain another feature from your chosen Hunter Archetype.
Level 15: Nen Mastery
- Gain mastery over your aura, significantly increasing your Aura Point (AP) maximum and potentially unlocking unique uses for your Nen.
Level 16: Ability Score Improvement
- As with level 4.
Level 17: Indomitable (3 uses)
- As with level 9, but you can use this feature three times between long rests.
Level 18: Archetype Feature
- Gain an additional feature from your chosen Hunter Archetype.
Level 19: Ability Score Improvement
- As with level 4.
Level 20: Hunter's Pinnacle
- Reach the pinnacle of your Hunter abilities, granting a significant, unique power or enhancement related to your Nen type and Hunter Archetype. This could be a powerful new Nen ability, a permanent increase to key stats, or another major benefit.
Each subclass within the Hunter class would have similar structure, with unique abilities and features tailored to their specialization, such as Sea Hunter, Gourmet Hunter, etc. This approach keeps the balance and progression familiar to D&D 5e while integrating the unique elements of the "Hunter x Hunter" universe.
Beast Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Beast Tracking - Gain proficiency in Survival. If you already have it, double your proficiency bonus for Survival checks related to beasts. - Learn to track and identify creatures by their tracks, noises, and other signs.Level 6: Primal Communication - Ability to communicate on a basic level with beasts and understand their intentions and emotions.
Level 10: Beast Companion - Bond with a beast you encounter, which becomes your faithful companion. - Use the Ranger's Companion feature from the Ranger class as a reference for rules and stats.
Level 14: Predator's Instinct - Gain advantage on initiative rolls in natural environments. - Can't be surprised by beast-type creatures.
Level 18: Master of Beasts - Gain the ability to temporarily control or influence the behavior of beasts through Nen.
Sea Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Aquatic Adaptation - Gain the ability to breathe underwater and a swimming speed equal to your walking speed. - Gain proficiency in Athletics. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus for Athletics checks related to swimming.Level 6: Deep Sea Knowledge - Advantage on Nature and Survival checks related to aquatic environments. - Can identify aquatic creatures and plants and their uses or dangers.
Level 10: Pressure Resistance - Gain resistance to cold damage and ignore the effects of deep and cold water pressure.
Level 14: Master Navigator - Can never be lost at sea. Gain proficiency in Navigation tools. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus.
Level 18: Call of the Depths - Ability to summon and communicate with sea creatures, possibly enlisting their help or guidance.
Treasure Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Artifact Lore - Gain proficiency in History. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus for History checks related to artifacts and treasures. - Can identify and appraise artifacts and relics.Level 6: Trap Sense - Gain advantage on saving throws against traps and spells that protect treasures. - Can detect the presence of traps within a 30-foot radius.
Level 10: Dungeon Delver - Move at normal speed while stealthily exploring ruins and dungeons. - Resistance to damage from traps.
Level 14: Ancient Secrets - Can decipher ancient languages and codes. Gain advantage on Intelligence checks related to ancient texts and puzzles.
Level 18: Treasure's Boon - Once per long rest, can locate a significant treasure, artifact, or hidden place within a 10-mile radius.
Music Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Harmonic Awareness - Gain proficiency in a musical instrument of your choice. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can detect mood and intentions of others through their tone and choice of words.Level 6: Soothing Melody - Can use music to calm emotions, dispel fear, or inspire courage in others.
Level 10: Sonic Resonance - Gain resistance to thunder damage and charm effects. - Can use music to communicate simple ideas to creatures that don't speak any languages.
Level 14: Echolocation - Through focused listening, can sense the location of objects and creatures in complete darkness within a 60-foot radius.
Level 18: Symphony of Power - Once per long rest, can play a powerful melody that grants temporary hit points, cures one condition, or boosts one ability score for the duration of the performance.
Gourmet Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Culinary Expertise - Gain proficiency in Cooking tools. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can identify edible and medicinal plants and creatures, and the best ways to prepare them.Level 6: Enhanced Taste - Can detect poisons and potions by taste. Gain advantage on saving throws against ingested poisons.
Level 10: Exotic Cuisine - Can prepare meals that grant temporary hit points or other minor benefits.
Level 14: Iron Stomach - Gain immunity to poison and disease from ingested sources.
Level 18: Culinary Masterpiece - Once per long rest, can create a meal that acts as a Greater Restoration spell or provides a significant buff to the party.
Blacklist Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Investigative Skills - Gain proficiency in Investigation. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can gather information and track targets in urban environments more efficiently.Level 6: Interrogation Expert - Gain advantage on Insight and Intimidation checks when interrogating.
Level 10: Criminal Network - Can establish contacts and gather information from criminal sources. Gain advantage on Charisma checks when dealing with criminals.
Level 14: Expert Tracker - Gain the ability to track targets over long distances, even across different terrains.
Level 18: Master of Justice - Once per long rest, can discern the truth of any statement or determine the location of a person or object related to your investigation.
Medical Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Medical Knowledge - Gain proficiency in Medicine. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can stabilize a dying creature as a bonus action.Level 6: Herbalist - Can identify and create medicinal herbs and potions. Gain proficiency in Herbalism Kit.
Level 10: Healer's Touch - Can use a pool of healing points to restore hit points equal to 5 times your Hunter level. As an action, can touch a creature to restore any number of these points.
Level 14: Disease Resistance - Gain immunity to disease and advantage on saving throws against effects that cause illness.
Level 18: Lifesaver - Once per long rest, can perform a healing action that acts as a Resurrection spell without needing material components.
Archaeological Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Ancient Lore - Gain proficiency in History. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can identify and interpret historical artifacts, ruins, and texts.Level 6: Ruins Delver - Gain advantage on saving throws made to avoid or resist traps and natural hazards in ancient ruins and dungeons.
Level 10: Relic Hunter - Can sense the presence of significant historical artifacts within a 1-mile radius.
Level 14: Cryptographer - Gain the ability to decipher ancient codes and languages, and unlock magical inscriptions.
Level 18: Guardian's Favor - Once per long rest, can invoke ancient powers for protection or insight, granting advantage on a series of checks or resisting a powerful magical effect.
Information Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Network of Contacts - Gain proficiency in Persuasion. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can establish a network of informants to gather information more effectively.Level 6: Codebreaker - Gain advantage on Intelligence checks to intercept and decipher secret messages and codes.
Level 10: Eavesdropper - Gain the ability to listen in on conversations or sounds from great distances or through barriers.
Level 14: Master of Disguise - Can create disguises that allow blending into almost any environment or society. Advantage on checks made to maintain a disguise.
Level 18: Omnipresent Knowledge - Once per long rest, can gain detailed knowledge about a person, place, or object that is not commonly known or easily accessible.
Lost Hunter Subclass
Level 3: Expert Tracker - Gain proficiency in Survival. If already proficient, double the proficiency bonus. - Can track creatures and people across various terrains, and can discern the passage of time since their passing.Level 6: Urban Tracker - Adapted to tracking in urban environments, can navigate and gather information in cities efficiently.
Level 10: Sixth Sense - Gain a limited ability to sense the direction of a sought person or object within a 5-mile radius.
Level 14: Path Finder - Can create shortcuts or find the most efficient paths through natural and urban landscapes.
Level 18: Find the Lost - Once per long rest, can locate exactly a lost person or item, regardless of distance or barriers, as long as they are on the same plane of existence.
These subclass features provide specialized skills and abilities that align with the unique roles and expertise of each type of Hunter, allowing for a rich role-playing experience within the "Hunter x Hunter" and D&D 5e hybrid framework. Players can choose a path that best suits their interests and play style, diving deep into the diverse world of "Hunter x Hunter." . If anyone has any suggestions or questions please let me know. Also if you want the full chat gpt prompt you can DM me
2024.06.02 07:46 WeirdCatOnReddit My mom has cancer and I'm being selfish.
I genuinely don't know what to do in this situation. I can't tell if I have issues or what, but I feel like a monster for how I am feeling right now. I'm on my last year of high school before I go to college, so, I think I need to unload some stuff here right now. This might be a long vent, but here it goes.
Way before my mom got cancer, me and her have a very complicated relationship, you know, the typical teenager and traditional, old school parents kinda thing. Understandably, I'm known to be a lazy, spoiled, arrogant, and selfish kid, who doesn't give a shit about anybody else except for himself. Since I was younger, that was how I was raised, I had everything already ready on my hands. Besides that, I have some attention/ focus issues, as I would daydream unusually way too much and I have low understanding skills, thus always getting left behind by my classmates. I have high self-awareness on my flaws, and that is part of the problem.
My mother has always been strict with me and my older brother, for a good reason. She grew up very.poor and had to work hard for decades to get to where we are. This took a massive toll on her health, as she now has an autoimmune condition and her body had been failing her. I always considered my brother to the favorite child, because he's the smartest, most diligent, and loyal kid in the family -- unlike me. My mom has always claimed that she loves us all equally, but she always compares me to my brother, and even my friends, who are always winning trophies and getting top grades in school. I never won a trophy or medal before, and never got the top grades.
School was always something I struggled with. I'm pretty sure I have ADHD but I haven't confirmed yet. I tried asking my mom if I could perhaps see a doctor or try to get her attention on my problems, but my mom is the type of parents that doesn't believe in mental health and just called me a "lazy, selfish, brat". She uses the claim that "You haven't suffered before, there are others having worst than you" and etc. She brushes away my problems, claiming them to be a negative flaw of mine. Not only that, she is also homophobic, much to the dismay of my closeted self. I know about my flaws and I've been trying to better myself, but because of the things that I did, my mother has zero trust in me and continued to treat me as if I was going to do something bad again.
Because of this, thoughts of suicide and even more violent thoughts arrived. There were many times where I had attempted to do it, but I was too much of a coward, another flaw that my mom pointed out. Quarantine took a massive impact on me and I have felt like absolute shit. My mind became so down in the deeps, that I even developed an unhealthy addiction to something that I am too ashamed to mention here, but just so you know, it is something that ruined my life, relationships and my sleep. Nobody knows that I have this addiction.
Then, at one point, I broke down and told my mom about my issues and how I attempted suicide. But all she did was brush it off and used those same words again, and then it became a joke. Since then, my emotions went from sad and utterly depressed, to just full on anger and hatred. Me and my mom would get into more frequent arguments and such, but it was nothing too big and wasn't that much. But that all changed a few months back.
A few months back, my mom was diagnosed with cancer. It broke her and the family apart. I hated seeing my mom in this condition, always in pain, crying and screaming because of the painful medicine and treatment, and just, she was in absolute pain. But she still continued work from the early morning until the late of evening, just to support us. I tried doing my best to help her, but she told to just "focus on my studies and graduate". I even offered to find a job or something besides school, but she told me that it was stupid and that a child shouldn't have to do this. My mom still cares about me, despite the fact that she was slowly dying.
However, perhaps because of the treatment and the fact that she doesn't have much time left. my mother became much more angrier. Everyday now, she would shout and berate people, from waiters in restaurants, the entire family (even my grandparents), my father, and me. My brother is living abroad in a different country, which means that he doesn't understand what's happening on home, which is why I couldn't talk much about my mom with him because he always assumes I'm overreacting.
Eventually, all that anger and frustration that my mom felt, all came down to me. She would take out it out me verbally and emotionally, by berating me, screaming at me in public, and calling me all sorts of terrible things. She wants to see me become perfect and succeed, thus why, I believe she was being super strict with me. I stopped fighting back with her and I just endured all the anger, as I knew that if I retorted, she would die quicker.
However, I guess the breaking point was an argument in the hospital. There was a miscommunication between me and her, which led to the worst berating of my life. She called me a "heartless brat" and "a piece of shit", and claimed that I don't love her and I only want her alive for the money. I couldn't take it anymore so I shouted back, and told her that I wish I was never born to be her child, and then I stormed out from the hospital, unable to keep myself calm any longer.
And now since then, our relationship has been growing more complicated. Some days, she would be fine and happy to be with me and the rest of the family. But on most days, she would just explode. The berating got worse with me, especially how she told me that she would rather die than see me become a failure. I have also grown more violent, as I would now punch or hit my head on the walls, and I wanted to kill myself not because of my depression, but because of pure anger and spite at everything. I started treating everybody like shit, always getting angry at them and secretly feeling hatred and envy towards my friends. I had thoughts of beating people up or hurting others physically, and some more violent thoughts, but I just couldn't find the right chance to do that. I even planned my suicide and secretly wrote a note, ready to use it when the time comes.
As I am typing this now, me and my mom had another big fight regarding a schoolwork of mine. In one of our classes, we were supposed to have some kind of project fair, basically presenting our essay. It was supposed to tomorrow, but the dumbass, boring teacher that everybody hates moved it to Tuesday -- the day that me, my family, and mom will be going out of the country to treat my mom at an advanced hospital. The teacher then claimed that for those who did not show up, they will get a zero. The teacher is known to hate teaching his students, doesn't bother to make the class engaging, and would give people low scores no matter what. Because of this, my mom had to admit about her cancer to the teacher and why I should present tomorrow, instead of Tuesday. My teacher luckily agreed and I would be presenting it tomorrow alone, which is fine. My mom emailed me the message about that news. However, I accidentally misread something in the message, which would become a terrible fault of mine. Today, when my mom was talking the project to me, there was a word that I didn't recognize and tried to ask what she meant. This exploded her and she screamed, berated me for the entire afternoon, because I had misread one word.
Now, I have locked myself up in my bedroom, typing this. I want to just jump out from my window and end it there. My mom always told me that the reason for her cancer, was because of me. So if I just end myself now, I don't think my mom will be in pain anymore. I know my mom doesn't mean what she said, but words hurt a lot more than anything. I want to get out of here, but at the same time, I want to stay. If I try to talk about this with my mom, she'll just berate me again and call me ungrateful again. I think I'm in my breaking point and I don't know what to do. I hate myself, and I want to end it. I can't take it anymore.
Am I being selfish? I'm sorry that this is a long vent, I just need to release some steam. I love my mom so much and she has made so many sacrifices, just to feed us and build a roof over our heads. I want to help her, but I am genuinely conflicted. Hopefully one day, I can resolve our relationship. I don't know what to do. I just want my mom to understand me.
submitted by WeirdCatOnReddit to offmychest [link] [comments]
Way before my mom got cancer, me and her have a very complicated relationship, you know, the typical teenager and traditional, old school parents kinda thing. Understandably, I'm known to be a lazy, spoiled, arrogant, and selfish kid, who doesn't give a shit about anybody else except for himself. Since I was younger, that was how I was raised, I had everything already ready on my hands. Besides that, I have some attention/ focus issues, as I would daydream unusually way too much and I have low understanding skills, thus always getting left behind by my classmates. I have high self-awareness on my flaws, and that is part of the problem.
My mother has always been strict with me and my older brother, for a good reason. She grew up very.poor and had to work hard for decades to get to where we are. This took a massive toll on her health, as she now has an autoimmune condition and her body had been failing her. I always considered my brother to the favorite child, because he's the smartest, most diligent, and loyal kid in the family -- unlike me. My mom has always claimed that she loves us all equally, but she always compares me to my brother, and even my friends, who are always winning trophies and getting top grades in school. I never won a trophy or medal before, and never got the top grades.
School was always something I struggled with. I'm pretty sure I have ADHD but I haven't confirmed yet. I tried asking my mom if I could perhaps see a doctor or try to get her attention on my problems, but my mom is the type of parents that doesn't believe in mental health and just called me a "lazy, selfish, brat". She uses the claim that "You haven't suffered before, there are others having worst than you" and etc. She brushes away my problems, claiming them to be a negative flaw of mine. Not only that, she is also homophobic, much to the dismay of my closeted self. I know about my flaws and I've been trying to better myself, but because of the things that I did, my mother has zero trust in me and continued to treat me as if I was going to do something bad again.
Because of this, thoughts of suicide and even more violent thoughts arrived. There were many times where I had attempted to do it, but I was too much of a coward, another flaw that my mom pointed out. Quarantine took a massive impact on me and I have felt like absolute shit. My mind became so down in the deeps, that I even developed an unhealthy addiction to something that I am too ashamed to mention here, but just so you know, it is something that ruined my life, relationships and my sleep. Nobody knows that I have this addiction.
Then, at one point, I broke down and told my mom about my issues and how I attempted suicide. But all she did was brush it off and used those same words again, and then it became a joke. Since then, my emotions went from sad and utterly depressed, to just full on anger and hatred. Me and my mom would get into more frequent arguments and such, but it was nothing too big and wasn't that much. But that all changed a few months back.
A few months back, my mom was diagnosed with cancer. It broke her and the family apart. I hated seeing my mom in this condition, always in pain, crying and screaming because of the painful medicine and treatment, and just, she was in absolute pain. But she still continued work from the early morning until the late of evening, just to support us. I tried doing my best to help her, but she told to just "focus on my studies and graduate". I even offered to find a job or something besides school, but she told me that it was stupid and that a child shouldn't have to do this. My mom still cares about me, despite the fact that she was slowly dying.
However, perhaps because of the treatment and the fact that she doesn't have much time left. my mother became much more angrier. Everyday now, she would shout and berate people, from waiters in restaurants, the entire family (even my grandparents), my father, and me. My brother is living abroad in a different country, which means that he doesn't understand what's happening on home, which is why I couldn't talk much about my mom with him because he always assumes I'm overreacting.
Eventually, all that anger and frustration that my mom felt, all came down to me. She would take out it out me verbally and emotionally, by berating me, screaming at me in public, and calling me all sorts of terrible things. She wants to see me become perfect and succeed, thus why, I believe she was being super strict with me. I stopped fighting back with her and I just endured all the anger, as I knew that if I retorted, she would die quicker.
However, I guess the breaking point was an argument in the hospital. There was a miscommunication between me and her, which led to the worst berating of my life. She called me a "heartless brat" and "a piece of shit", and claimed that I don't love her and I only want her alive for the money. I couldn't take it anymore so I shouted back, and told her that I wish I was never born to be her child, and then I stormed out from the hospital, unable to keep myself calm any longer.
And now since then, our relationship has been growing more complicated. Some days, she would be fine and happy to be with me and the rest of the family. But on most days, she would just explode. The berating got worse with me, especially how she told me that she would rather die than see me become a failure. I have also grown more violent, as I would now punch or hit my head on the walls, and I wanted to kill myself not because of my depression, but because of pure anger and spite at everything. I started treating everybody like shit, always getting angry at them and secretly feeling hatred and envy towards my friends. I had thoughts of beating people up or hurting others physically, and some more violent thoughts, but I just couldn't find the right chance to do that. I even planned my suicide and secretly wrote a note, ready to use it when the time comes.
As I am typing this now, me and my mom had another big fight regarding a schoolwork of mine. In one of our classes, we were supposed to have some kind of project fair, basically presenting our essay. It was supposed to tomorrow, but the dumbass, boring teacher that everybody hates moved it to Tuesday -- the day that me, my family, and mom will be going out of the country to treat my mom at an advanced hospital. The teacher then claimed that for those who did not show up, they will get a zero. The teacher is known to hate teaching his students, doesn't bother to make the class engaging, and would give people low scores no matter what. Because of this, my mom had to admit about her cancer to the teacher and why I should present tomorrow, instead of Tuesday. My teacher luckily agreed and I would be presenting it tomorrow alone, which is fine. My mom emailed me the message about that news. However, I accidentally misread something in the message, which would become a terrible fault of mine. Today, when my mom was talking the project to me, there was a word that I didn't recognize and tried to ask what she meant. This exploded her and she screamed, berated me for the entire afternoon, because I had misread one word.
Now, I have locked myself up in my bedroom, typing this. I want to just jump out from my window and end it there. My mom always told me that the reason for her cancer, was because of me. So if I just end myself now, I don't think my mom will be in pain anymore. I know my mom doesn't mean what she said, but words hurt a lot more than anything. I want to get out of here, but at the same time, I want to stay. If I try to talk about this with my mom, she'll just berate me again and call me ungrateful again. I think I'm in my breaking point and I don't know what to do. I hate myself, and I want to end it. I can't take it anymore.
Am I being selfish? I'm sorry that this is a long vent, I just need to release some steam. I love my mom so much and she has made so many sacrifices, just to feed us and build a roof over our heads. I want to help her, but I am genuinely conflicted. Hopefully one day, I can resolve our relationship. I don't know what to do. I just want my mom to understand me.
2024.06.02 07:44 Aware_Environment_82 LIUNA
Is there any Laborers on here? I was wondering if anyone could tell me what a laborer is making and how much OT you guys might be working? I'm interested in potentially joining the Laborers local in my area, south central Pennsylvania, I've looked up the wage rates for my area but I waw curious as to how much a laborer can actually make weekly and yearly. I'm currently a water treatment plant operator making just over $29 an hour but that doesn't go as far as it used to. I'd like to work outside and with my hands instead of sitting behind a computer. Prior to becoming a treatment plant operator I was a laborer for the city I work for. I loved working as a laborer and would love to work as a construction craft Laborer, union of course, but need to weigh the pros and cons of switching careers. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you guys.
submitted by Aware_Environment_82 to union [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 07:25 Accomplished_Oil527 Sample collection for genetics study complete: What's next?
Dear patients, supporters, donors, and friends,
Exciting news: Our second scientific study has wrapped up its sample collection phase and is now in full swing.
Today marks a significant milestone as we've successfully collected blood samples from over 150 patients, with a third of this data already on its way to Dr. Alfonso Urbanucci and his team at The University of Tampere. While we may need to collect some samples again, we are now considering sample collection complete.
This achievement is the culmination of six years of dedicated work by PFS Network, our research group and volunteers.
Alongside our ongoing study at The University of Kiel, these milestones signify unparalleled progress towards understanding PFS and developing safe, effective treatments for patients. We're more hopeful than ever about what lies ahead.
This progress has been hard-fought and largely led by patients, some of whom are no longer with us. We extend our deepest gratitude to everyone who has contributed to reaching this point.
Special appreciation goes to the staff who initially volunteered to moderate the propeciahelp forum back in 2018. Despite the lack of recognition, their pivotal role paved the way for community-wide collaboration, resulting in significant achievements, including
We'd also like to extend our gratitude to everyone who has contributed to PFSN projects, whether through data analysis, SEO assistance, video editing, participant recruitment, media engagement, or other forms of support. Your contributions have been invaluable.
In total, our charity has raised nearly half a million euros over three years, a remarkable feat considering the grassroots nature of our fundraising efforts. These funds have supported two major projects and enabled us to hire our first PhD student. We are profoundly grateful to all who have contributed.
A special thanks to our major donors, who have generously provided the majority of our funding. Approximately 87% of our funds come from 'private donors,' including patient families, individual wealthy patients, and our first grant.
We also express gratitude to patient donors whose consistent support, though smaller in scale, has been invaluable.
While we are immensely grateful for their support in launching these projects, we also recognise the contributions of others who have made these studies possible. This includes clinical support for patient and control tissue collection for the Kiel study, researchers who have previously published on the topic, and the teams supporting lead researchers at their institutions.
In 2018, cohesive patient participation platforms were scarce, clinical data was limited, and appropriate scientific research on the condition was lacking. The achievements of recent years are not accidental but the result of careful planning and thoughtful collaboration.
Throughout our journey, we've emphasised the importance of patience and practical, incremental steps towards understanding, recognition, and eventual treatments. We remind patients of the principles that got us here and urge you not to take this progress for granted.
As we move forward with both studies, our focus shifts to supporting researchers in their vital work. While we cannot provide detailed updates from the lab as frequently, rest assured we'll maintain regular communication, now on a quarterly basis instead.
Over the coming months, we'll continue consulting with our scientific advisory team, analysing incoming data, and exploring new projects to advance understanding and awareness of PFS.
To some, especially new patients, progress over the coming months may seem slow or non-existent. However, the most significant work is now underway.
We're cognizant that this could result in a situation reminiscent of 2018, characterised by a tendency towards quick solutions and increased complacency.
Please understand that our progress has been achievable only through broad cooperation and support of clearly defined, justified projects. We advise patients to carefully consider who they entrust to spearhead progress and meticulously assess any individual or group asking for their support.
Please remain active in driving progress forward, chiefly by backing our initiatives and motivating others to do the same. If you're currently contributing financially, please maintain your support to ensure timely commencement of potential new projects, when ready. Additionally, as advocated in our 2024 fundraising campaign, please continue to inspire your loved ones to contribute financially whenever feasible.
Thank you all for your unwavering dedication and support. Despite the road ahead, our optimism for the future has never been higher.
submitted by Accomplished_Oil527 to FinasterideSyndrome [link] [comments]
Exciting news: Our second scientific study has wrapped up its sample collection phase and is now in full swing.
Today marks a significant milestone as we've successfully collected blood samples from over 150 patients, with a third of this data already on its way to Dr. Alfonso Urbanucci and his team at The University of Tampere. While we may need to collect some samples again, we are now considering sample collection complete.
This achievement is the culmination of six years of dedicated work by PFS Network, our research group and volunteers.
Alongside our ongoing study at The University of Kiel, these milestones signify unparalleled progress towards understanding PFS and developing safe, effective treatments for patients. We're more hopeful than ever about what lies ahead.
This progress has been hard-fought and largely led by patients, some of whom are no longer with us. We extend our deepest gratitude to everyone who has contributed to reaching this point.
Patient Volunteers
A heartfelt thank you to all who have volunteered for our organisation. Your support forms the bedrock of our progress.Special appreciation goes to the staff who initially volunteered to moderate the propeciahelp forum back in 2018. Despite the lack of recognition, their pivotal role paved the way for community-wide collaboration, resulting in significant achievements, including
- Gathering over 400 responses for our patient survey, now in the process of publication in scientific literature.
- Hosting over 20 videos on our YouTube channel, featuring patients, family members, clinicians, and researchers.
- Recruiting over 200 patients for ongoing scientific studies.
We'd also like to extend our gratitude to everyone who has contributed to PFSN projects, whether through data analysis, SEO assistance, video editing, participant recruitment, media engagement, or other forms of support. Your contributions have been invaluable.
Donors
When we embarked on fundraising for our study at The University of Kiel in December 2021, we had modest expectations. The overwhelming response, reaching our 80,000 EUR target within four months, exceeded all expectations.In total, our charity has raised nearly half a million euros over three years, a remarkable feat considering the grassroots nature of our fundraising efforts. These funds have supported two major projects and enabled us to hire our first PhD student. We are profoundly grateful to all who have contributed.
A special thanks to our major donors, who have generously provided the majority of our funding. Approximately 87% of our funds come from 'private donors,' including patient families, individual wealthy patients, and our first grant.
We also express gratitude to patient donors whose consistent support, though smaller in scale, has been invaluable.
Researchers & Clinicians
We've often expressed our gratitude for the exceptional team of researchers we're privileged to work with. What began as individual research endeavours has evolved into a comprehensive scientific advisory team comprising experts across various fields.While we are immensely grateful for their support in launching these projects, we also recognise the contributions of others who have made these studies possible. This includes clinical support for patient and control tissue collection for the Kiel study, researchers who have previously published on the topic, and the teams supporting lead researchers at their institutions.
What's Next
Reflecting on our progress, it's essential to recognise the concerted effort it has required. Equally important is acknowledging the state of affairs before these advancements.In 2018, cohesive patient participation platforms were scarce, clinical data was limited, and appropriate scientific research on the condition was lacking. The achievements of recent years are not accidental but the result of careful planning and thoughtful collaboration.
Throughout our journey, we've emphasised the importance of patience and practical, incremental steps towards understanding, recognition, and eventual treatments. We remind patients of the principles that got us here and urge you not to take this progress for granted.
As we move forward with both studies, our focus shifts to supporting researchers in their vital work. While we cannot provide detailed updates from the lab as frequently, rest assured we'll maintain regular communication, now on a quarterly basis instead.
Over the coming months, we'll continue consulting with our scientific advisory team, analysing incoming data, and exploring new projects to advance understanding and awareness of PFS.
To some, especially new patients, progress over the coming months may seem slow or non-existent. However, the most significant work is now underway.
We're cognizant that this could result in a situation reminiscent of 2018, characterised by a tendency towards quick solutions and increased complacency.
Please understand that our progress has been achievable only through broad cooperation and support of clearly defined, justified projects. We advise patients to carefully consider who they entrust to spearhead progress and meticulously assess any individual or group asking for their support.
Please remain active in driving progress forward, chiefly by backing our initiatives and motivating others to do the same. If you're currently contributing financially, please maintain your support to ensure timely commencement of potential new projects, when ready. Additionally, as advocated in our 2024 fundraising campaign, please continue to inspire your loved ones to contribute financially whenever feasible.
Thank you all for your unwavering dedication and support. Despite the road ahead, our optimism for the future has never been higher.
2024.06.02 07:03 Ok-Preparation3855 I(25F) want to live alone but my dad(59M) wouldn't let me
I(24F) have been living with my parents since forever, and the only small stint of freedom I got was when I lived by myself for 1.5 years when I got my first job. During that time period, my mom was diagnosed with cancer, and she was living with my brother his wife for her treatment. I used to go there every other weekend, and also took care of her during her surgery(plus my dad used to take her to chemo treatments).
After all her treatments were done, we believed she was cancer free, she was put on hormone medicine for the next 5 years. It fooled us into believing everything was fine. At that time, my dad had gotten himself transferred to the city I lived in for my job, and so I had to start living with them again. Unfortunately, my mom passed away 2 months after she moved here(that is a whole different story itself). I continued living with my dad, but it is hard. Along with the grief, I also had to deal with my dad alone now, while earlier it was mom who used to be the medium(basically for every family member, she kept the family together).
My dad is not a positive person, he is okay and has always provided for me, but I feel stifled living with him. He retires next year, and he has made the plan for us to continue living together. I do not want to, I dread that so much. Plus with him being retired and home all the time next year, I cannot handle that. My brother is moving to another country this year, and even he doesn't get along with him much. My dad is quite healthy, he takes care of himself. He only has diabetes as a health issue, but he manages it well. He stays active, entertains himself by going for watching movies, music programs etc. Point is, he can totally live alone.
The reason why he wants to live with me- To make sure I don't get a boyfriend out of my caste/religion. He is paranoid about that, because my brother's wife is out of our caste, he doesn't want me to do the same. So for him, the only way to do that is control me under the guise of keeping me safe. on top of that, pretty much everyone I talk to about this, says that I should live with my aging father, "how can he live alone?"
I don't know what to do, I don't want to leave my job and my current city. I am trying to grow my career in this company through a training program.
My dad can shift back to our hometown, he has a support system of his family there. But he will not agree to live there, unless I steel myself and find some way to leave this city. Maybe through education or a job. But I feel resentful about having to leave because of my own father.
Another point to add, I felt guilty after my mom's death about not leaving my job to live with my mom throughout her cancer treatment. I feel terrified about something similar happening to my dad and piling onto the guilt I already feel.
submitted by Ok-Preparation3855 to AgingParents [link] [comments]
After all her treatments were done, we believed she was cancer free, she was put on hormone medicine for the next 5 years. It fooled us into believing everything was fine. At that time, my dad had gotten himself transferred to the city I lived in for my job, and so I had to start living with them again. Unfortunately, my mom passed away 2 months after she moved here(that is a whole different story itself). I continued living with my dad, but it is hard. Along with the grief, I also had to deal with my dad alone now, while earlier it was mom who used to be the medium(basically for every family member, she kept the family together).
My dad is not a positive person, he is okay and has always provided for me, but I feel stifled living with him. He retires next year, and he has made the plan for us to continue living together. I do not want to, I dread that so much. Plus with him being retired and home all the time next year, I cannot handle that. My brother is moving to another country this year, and even he doesn't get along with him much. My dad is quite healthy, he takes care of himself. He only has diabetes as a health issue, but he manages it well. He stays active, entertains himself by going for watching movies, music programs etc. Point is, he can totally live alone.
The reason why he wants to live with me- To make sure I don't get a boyfriend out of my caste/religion. He is paranoid about that, because my brother's wife is out of our caste, he doesn't want me to do the same. So for him, the only way to do that is control me under the guise of keeping me safe. on top of that, pretty much everyone I talk to about this, says that I should live with my aging father, "how can he live alone?"
I don't know what to do, I don't want to leave my job and my current city. I am trying to grow my career in this company through a training program.
My dad can shift back to our hometown, he has a support system of his family there. But he will not agree to live there, unless I steel myself and find some way to leave this city. Maybe through education or a job. But I feel resentful about having to leave because of my own father.
Another point to add, I felt guilty after my mom's death about not leaving my job to live with my mom throughout her cancer treatment. I feel terrified about something similar happening to my dad and piling onto the guilt I already feel.
2024.06.02 07:02 Fluid-Ad4264 Help! Drama! Is it too far gone?
Warning: This is a long and confusing post that spans over 2 years, so here’s some backstory. My husband (22 M) and I (22 F) initially got married a year and a half ago with a small private ceremony. We planned to have a big destination wedding a year later. Though we didn't walk down the aisle, we said our vows, exchanged rings, said our I dos, and kissed. We only invited our parents, siblings, and close family friends—fewer than 15 people. We got married on a random Tuesday, and everyone made it except my husband’s sister (25 F).
My relationship with my SIL was super friendly until it became tense and complicated once I mentioned that her brother and I were possibly getting engaged. We worked together as part-time entry-level employees, and I noticed a significant difference in her attitude after we announced our engagement. I didn’t realize she would go to the lengths of not showing up to our wedding. Not only did she not attend, but she also ghosted us for months afterward. The only acknowledgment was a text saying, “Congrats, so happy for y’all.” She did not explain missing the ceremony. At work, she was very cold and only talked about work, never our personal lives like before. I hoped we could return to being friends someday.
My husband also received the silent treatment and decided to confront her. He asked if we had done anything to offend her and if we were good. Her only answer was, “I am doing great; there’s nothing wrong. I didn’t come to the ceremony because I had work.” I had asked our boss about this, and he was shocked, saying he would have given her the whole day off for the occasion. She had never mentioned it to him. We called BS, and she said, “The only reason I didn’t show up at the wedding was because I didn’t think it mattered. I’ll come to the destination wedding and watch it happen again.” This really shocked and hurt us.
Things got worse over time with my SIL. We kept trying to hang out with her—whether with her and her significant other, family, or just one-on-one—but she always had an excuse, whether it was work, being too tired, or something else. Here’s where the issue comes in. We decided to have the big party/wedding celebration in the States so more friends and family could come and avoid drama with my SIL. We kept the destination wedding plans to get professional photos done, having already paid for half of the ceremony and reception.
The big party in the States went off without a hitch, and there were so many people we didn’t have to interact with my husband’s sister. We felt relieved, thinking we were done with the drama. Nope. Some words were exchanged, and she basically told us that we expect too much from her and need to lower our standards. She said she would never be the person we wanted and essentially didn’t want to make time for us. After that, my husband was done. We got his parents involved, hoping to smooth things over, but it only made things worse. They kept defending her, saying we take things too seriously and that she doesn’t know when it’s not cool to joke around. We became very fed up.
My husband and I decided that the final destination wedding would be very private and invite-only. We invited his parents, my parents, and both sets of grandparents. Most people except his parents had already RSVPd and started paying their deposits. His mom asked me to resend the email with the travel info, so I did. Then, I got an email from my travel agent asking to check the guest list. I saw two names to which I hadn’t sent the travel info. I knew only one person could have given that email to my SIL—my MIL. Yay.
We discussed this with his parents, asking them to respect our decision and let my husband handle his issues with his sister without interference. His parents didn’t like that. They started screaming that SIL was a family and that the family sticks together. They said she was going to the destination wedding whether we liked it or not and that if she wasn’t invited, we could take them off the list too—they weren’t going. It irks me to see my husband treated so poorly by his own family. It makes me incredibly sad and mad. I stood up for him, asking if they used the “but he/she is family” excuse with SIL, but they said no. They claimed they hadn’t had a chance to talk to her. What a bunch of bull. They kept emphasizing that she was their little girl and they needed to fight for her. This made me very angry. My husband is equally their child. The line was drawn, and they blamed my husband for breaking the family. They said his decision was ruining the family forever.
What do we do? Should we invite them all and call it a day? Do we stick to our guns and let it play out? My husband and I are so hurt and sad. Honestly, after this destination wedding, we plan to distance ourselves from them.
submitted by Fluid-Ad4264 to weddingplanning [link] [comments]
My relationship with my SIL was super friendly until it became tense and complicated once I mentioned that her brother and I were possibly getting engaged. We worked together as part-time entry-level employees, and I noticed a significant difference in her attitude after we announced our engagement. I didn’t realize she would go to the lengths of not showing up to our wedding. Not only did she not attend, but she also ghosted us for months afterward. The only acknowledgment was a text saying, “Congrats, so happy for y’all.” She did not explain missing the ceremony. At work, she was very cold and only talked about work, never our personal lives like before. I hoped we could return to being friends someday.
My husband also received the silent treatment and decided to confront her. He asked if we had done anything to offend her and if we were good. Her only answer was, “I am doing great; there’s nothing wrong. I didn’t come to the ceremony because I had work.” I had asked our boss about this, and he was shocked, saying he would have given her the whole day off for the occasion. She had never mentioned it to him. We called BS, and she said, “The only reason I didn’t show up at the wedding was because I didn’t think it mattered. I’ll come to the destination wedding and watch it happen again.” This really shocked and hurt us.
Things got worse over time with my SIL. We kept trying to hang out with her—whether with her and her significant other, family, or just one-on-one—but she always had an excuse, whether it was work, being too tired, or something else. Here’s where the issue comes in. We decided to have the big party/wedding celebration in the States so more friends and family could come and avoid drama with my SIL. We kept the destination wedding plans to get professional photos done, having already paid for half of the ceremony and reception.
The big party in the States went off without a hitch, and there were so many people we didn’t have to interact with my husband’s sister. We felt relieved, thinking we were done with the drama. Nope. Some words were exchanged, and she basically told us that we expect too much from her and need to lower our standards. She said she would never be the person we wanted and essentially didn’t want to make time for us. After that, my husband was done. We got his parents involved, hoping to smooth things over, but it only made things worse. They kept defending her, saying we take things too seriously and that she doesn’t know when it’s not cool to joke around. We became very fed up.
My husband and I decided that the final destination wedding would be very private and invite-only. We invited his parents, my parents, and both sets of grandparents. Most people except his parents had already RSVPd and started paying their deposits. His mom asked me to resend the email with the travel info, so I did. Then, I got an email from my travel agent asking to check the guest list. I saw two names to which I hadn’t sent the travel info. I knew only one person could have given that email to my SIL—my MIL. Yay.
We discussed this with his parents, asking them to respect our decision and let my husband handle his issues with his sister without interference. His parents didn’t like that. They started screaming that SIL was a family and that the family sticks together. They said she was going to the destination wedding whether we liked it or not and that if she wasn’t invited, we could take them off the list too—they weren’t going. It irks me to see my husband treated so poorly by his own family. It makes me incredibly sad and mad. I stood up for him, asking if they used the “but he/she is family” excuse with SIL, but they said no. They claimed they hadn’t had a chance to talk to her. What a bunch of bull. They kept emphasizing that she was their little girl and they needed to fight for her. This made me very angry. My husband is equally their child. The line was drawn, and they blamed my husband for breaking the family. They said his decision was ruining the family forever.
What do we do? Should we invite them all and call it a day? Do we stick to our guns and let it play out? My husband and I are so hurt and sad. Honestly, after this destination wedding, we plan to distance ourselves from them.
2024.06.02 06:48 Initial_Bed_5480 Four cats advice
Hey everyone! I’m new to this page and I’m looking to get some advice. This evening, my husband and I went bowling and when we got to the car, we heard meowing underneath. This kitten was soakin wet (it had been raining), and dirty. I wasn’t going to leave him afraid, cold, and wet- so we took it home. This isn’t our first rodeo, so we got him bathed, fed, and he’s got a bedroom in our guest bathroom. He has an upper respiratory infection, and we picked off at least 15 fleas during his bath. We’re taking him to our vet on Monday to get shots, an antibiotic, and maybe a flea and tick treatment. We have 3 cats already. Winslow is about 5 years old, Howard is 2 years old, and Orion will be 1 in July. We’re keeping the baby separate from the others in case his infection can spread to the other cats. We’ll know more of what we’re working with after we take him to the vet. We’re planning on keeping him. The universal cat distribution system said we were ready for another cat, so I guess we are lol. So my question is, how are y’all able to keep your living space clean with 4+ cats? And does anyone have any advice on it? We have 3 litter boxes right now and I’m going to get 2 more, and scoop litter everyday of course. And I was thinking on getting an air purifier so the air in the house doesn’t get stagnant. I’m also planning on getting another cat tower for enrichment. The older 3 cats sleep in bed with us or sleep in the bedroom. We have beds in other places in the house but that’s where they choose to sleep. I’m not sure how I’m going to navigate that right now. And I have a good idea on how to navigate feeding times, but any and all advice on anything will be super helpful and appreciated. I’ve had cats all my life, but I’ve never had 4 at the same time. Anyways, thanks for reading this and thanks in advance for advice. I really appreciate it! 🐈
submitted by Initial_Bed_5480 to CatAdvice [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 06:44 SadSackingToday HRT, weight gain, general dammit it all to hell rant
Hello wise women,
I've been reading some of the posts about the variety of experiences with weight gain and HRT. My story is that I lost my period at age 43, when I happened to be running 250 miles per month. I wasn't overly lean IMO (I wasn't even down to my "normal" pre-child weight!). I was eating carnivore. Yes, all this was in response to a subtle shift in my body comp that I felt like a low pressure system deep in my being. The doctor and even my ND assumed I was in menopause after a year with no cycle. I worked with an amenorrhea coach and my ND. I started taken HRT due to my inability to get my periods back and my young age to protect my bones/ CV system. I had an insane reaction to the patches (wild deep red streaking all over my thighs and abdomen, not raised or bumpy or itchy). I switched to compound estradiol cream and 100mg of progesterone. My reaction to that? I got high. Laughing unable to walk upstairs to bed--it was awesome. But only lasted a few nights. I've since acclimated to the patch and have a higher dose since I keep testing low.
I have struggled with compliance. I would take the HRT and yes they helped w sleep and the bottomless depression; the mood help is pretty profound. My sex life is pretty great on HRT and pretty meh without. But on HRT the depression got worse in some ways bc of the rapid weight gain. In response, I would stop HRT, drop a few pounds and then inevitably the no-sleep demon and the other kind of marrow-deep depression would take me down. I would restart HRT. Each cycle was about 6 months. Then at the age of 47, I got my period back (last summer). For real. So I got to stop the hormones and wow I recognized myself in the mirror again very quickly (days!). I even went back to playing soccer - a lot. Maybe you can guess what happened a few months later...ACL rupture. Holy shit show. I did well w the surgery, excellent w the rehab and still, the depression/ the stress all of it, made my periods go away again.
I held out as long as I could but the no-sleep demon came for me and I had to go back on hormones. The weight gain is well, double-take level. As in, if I run into an old friend there is a visible swallow and eyes widening. I'm a former collegiate athlete, a surfer, I have a goddamn degree in exercise science and I have the discipline of an Olympian. I have a bike desk. I work out with impeccable form daily with proper periodization, planned rests, and have toned down the running (obs, see injury above). I can stick to any diet. I never overeat. I get my protein in daily. I hit my water goals. I take magnesium. All the things-done. I have never undereaten until this phase of my life. And this is crazy making. It feels like my body is gaslighting me. Oh you ate 1000kcals yesterday? Here's 3 extra pounds for your effort.
Like many of you, I had a traumatic childhood w a host of abuses. Trying and successfully figuring out cause and effect has saved my life on numerous occasions. It's important to me to understand why the laws of thermodynamics no longer apply. It's also bringing up some fear, uncertainty, & loss of control issues.
My pull-up game is weak (umm 1? If I cheat), my push-up game has suffered. My abs are still strong as hell but I can only see the top 4--the bottom part--WTAF is happening. I've put the work in, perhaps you may say too much work. If so, you a) may be right & b) maybe it will make someone out there feel better that someone with my track record/ experience is struggling mightily.
It's very important to me to feel in control of my body and I've tried to do so in a physically healthy way. For the mental part, I've done so much therapy. I've done every treatment under the sun short of electric shock therapy (thought about it) for mind and body. But the kind of stuff I went thru isn't the type of thing that really ever lets you feel safe again. This--my body, my health, my earning of my health has been my safety. Feeling fast and strong and fit has been my blankie. I want it back.
I'm currently 48, had a period last month, which I would love to think means I can stop HRT but since I re-injured my meniscus (PT had me jumping way too soon post-op sadly), I'm worried that my cycle has hidden again. I'm incredibly sensitive to stress and I always have been. Most of my life I've felt that I'm not quite cut out for it all due to my over sensitivity & insane hyper vigilance.
Has anyone else had such a clear weight up on HRT/ weight down off HRT experience? If so, did you say screw it, and just deal with low mood, no interest in sex, yet steamy, damp nights nonetheless...forever? Or did you go the other route and say eff it, I'm gonna see just how high my body fat can actually get to?
I'm tired of waffling between two of the shittiest choices on the market.
submitted by SadSackingToday to Menopause [link] [comments]
I've been reading some of the posts about the variety of experiences with weight gain and HRT. My story is that I lost my period at age 43, when I happened to be running 250 miles per month. I wasn't overly lean IMO (I wasn't even down to my "normal" pre-child weight!). I was eating carnivore. Yes, all this was in response to a subtle shift in my body comp that I felt like a low pressure system deep in my being. The doctor and even my ND assumed I was in menopause after a year with no cycle. I worked with an amenorrhea coach and my ND. I started taken HRT due to my inability to get my periods back and my young age to protect my bones/ CV system. I had an insane reaction to the patches (wild deep red streaking all over my thighs and abdomen, not raised or bumpy or itchy). I switched to compound estradiol cream and 100mg of progesterone. My reaction to that? I got high. Laughing unable to walk upstairs to bed--it was awesome. But only lasted a few nights. I've since acclimated to the patch and have a higher dose since I keep testing low.
I have struggled with compliance. I would take the HRT and yes they helped w sleep and the bottomless depression; the mood help is pretty profound. My sex life is pretty great on HRT and pretty meh without. But on HRT the depression got worse in some ways bc of the rapid weight gain. In response, I would stop HRT, drop a few pounds and then inevitably the no-sleep demon and the other kind of marrow-deep depression would take me down. I would restart HRT. Each cycle was about 6 months. Then at the age of 47, I got my period back (last summer). For real. So I got to stop the hormones and wow I recognized myself in the mirror again very quickly (days!). I even went back to playing soccer - a lot. Maybe you can guess what happened a few months later...ACL rupture. Holy shit show. I did well w the surgery, excellent w the rehab and still, the depression/ the stress all of it, made my periods go away again.
I held out as long as I could but the no-sleep demon came for me and I had to go back on hormones. The weight gain is well, double-take level. As in, if I run into an old friend there is a visible swallow and eyes widening. I'm a former collegiate athlete, a surfer, I have a goddamn degree in exercise science and I have the discipline of an Olympian. I have a bike desk. I work out with impeccable form daily with proper periodization, planned rests, and have toned down the running (obs, see injury above). I can stick to any diet. I never overeat. I get my protein in daily. I hit my water goals. I take magnesium. All the things-done. I have never undereaten until this phase of my life. And this is crazy making. It feels like my body is gaslighting me. Oh you ate 1000kcals yesterday? Here's 3 extra pounds for your effort.
Like many of you, I had a traumatic childhood w a host of abuses. Trying and successfully figuring out cause and effect has saved my life on numerous occasions. It's important to me to understand why the laws of thermodynamics no longer apply. It's also bringing up some fear, uncertainty, & loss of control issues.
My pull-up game is weak (umm 1? If I cheat), my push-up game has suffered. My abs are still strong as hell but I can only see the top 4--the bottom part--WTAF is happening. I've put the work in, perhaps you may say too much work. If so, you a) may be right & b) maybe it will make someone out there feel better that someone with my track record/ experience is struggling mightily.
It's very important to me to feel in control of my body and I've tried to do so in a physically healthy way. For the mental part, I've done so much therapy. I've done every treatment under the sun short of electric shock therapy (thought about it) for mind and body. But the kind of stuff I went thru isn't the type of thing that really ever lets you feel safe again. This--my body, my health, my earning of my health has been my safety. Feeling fast and strong and fit has been my blankie. I want it back.
I'm currently 48, had a period last month, which I would love to think means I can stop HRT but since I re-injured my meniscus (PT had me jumping way too soon post-op sadly), I'm worried that my cycle has hidden again. I'm incredibly sensitive to stress and I always have been. Most of my life I've felt that I'm not quite cut out for it all due to my over sensitivity & insane hyper vigilance.
Has anyone else had such a clear weight up on HRT/ weight down off HRT experience? If so, did you say screw it, and just deal with low mood, no interest in sex, yet steamy, damp nights nonetheless...forever? Or did you go the other route and say eff it, I'm gonna see just how high my body fat can actually get to?
I'm tired of waffling between two of the shittiest choices on the market.
2024.06.02 06:41 throwRA-bluedays I'm [23F] feeling hurt over this conflict with my roommate [22F]
I signed a lease this year in my college town but ultimately ended up taking a gap year. I had moved in this fall only to run into enrollment issues with my university. I don't want to go into detail but the administrative issues I ran into were really distressing for me. I tried yet again coming back for the second term, but as I couldn't resolve the issues in time to take classes again, I decided to get a subletter in my place. It was an incredibly stressful time for me, and my wellbeing had really declined as a result of it. Overtime I began to feel better after moving back home with my family and seeking treatment. I recently started working part-time and after months of counseling appointments I've now resolved things with my university to come back in-person next academic year.
This gap year was thus not planned, but forced in a sense, and I didn't anticipate it. When I had moved my first subletter in, they were only planning on staying for two months. My roommate knew about it and didn't mind; she was initially worried about it but quickly shared that the girl was really nice and she was worried for nothing. I originally planned to come back to my apartment after these two months and find work in my college town, but since I recently landed this position in my hometown, given that I wasn't taking classes in my college town anyways, I ultimately decided to just keep living at home. The subletter moved out.
About 5 weeks ago, I posted online that I was looking for a subletter to take over asap. My roommate texted me right after; she had gotten a notification for that post. She was upset that I had not told her beforehand and that she had to find out through an online post; she said she thought that we were closer than that. I felt really bad hearing this, since I really did not mean to hurt her feelings. I had thought to myself that I should tell her if I found someone that was interested in the place, but that I wouldn't need to say anything if I didn't even have a person that would want to move-in. Now I realize this was backwards and I should have alerted her that I was looking for someone. Truly though, I had not known myself that I wasn't coming back for more than a few days when I made that post, so I didn't even have the ability to have given her much of a heads up like she had hoped for, as I did not know myself.
I had the full intention of telling her I was going to get a subletter once I had found a person, so I had no intention of not telling her at all, of course. Quite the opposite, I would never have thought to move someone in without first talking to her about it, since she lives there and deserves to know. I just didn't think it really mattered if I told her after I had found a person or beforehand, but I see now that this was a source of hurt for her and I am sorry I made a choice that brought her this hurt. I've reached out to her three times now with an apologetic sentiment asking if we could talk about it, but all my messages have been ignored.
I have not even moved anyone in; at this point I have been paying my rent there for 2.5 months and will not move anyone in until everyone goes home for the summer, so I am not going to be making her live with a stranger like she was worried about. I have and have never had any intention of putting her in an uncomfortable situation. But, she has still been ignoring me for 5 weeks now over this. I really cherished her friendship, and I am confused because we were incredibly close. I know what I did must have really hurt her, but this is really hurting me now. I don't think what I did was a reason to completely stonewall and give me the silent treatment. I wish she could be a bit more empathetic to my situation (struggling with my wellbeing and being unable to continue in university for the year despite wanting to, being stuck in an expensive lease despite not living in the place).
I'm just really upset over this, and I don't understand how someone that I considered such a close and dear friend could feel ready to ice me out in this way. I've told my friends and family about this, and all of them are saying it's unfair that she's reacting this way when finding someone to take over for you after moving out is normal behavior, and everyone I've shared this with has told me that it really isn't a big deal that I posted that before telling her, since it's normal to scope out interest before saying something about it. I honestly just didn't think it was a big deal in the moment and this reaction feels incredibly harsh. I thought I was over it but tonight brought up a lot of feelings of anxiety for me over the situation, and it's hard not to feel like everyone hates me right now when I remember that she was ready to throw away a close friendship over something like this. I really struggle with receiving the silent treatment and it just feels so harsh for what I've done, which really isn't much of anything.
submitted by throwRA-bluedays to Advice [link] [comments]
This gap year was thus not planned, but forced in a sense, and I didn't anticipate it. When I had moved my first subletter in, they were only planning on staying for two months. My roommate knew about it and didn't mind; she was initially worried about it but quickly shared that the girl was really nice and she was worried for nothing. I originally planned to come back to my apartment after these two months and find work in my college town, but since I recently landed this position in my hometown, given that I wasn't taking classes in my college town anyways, I ultimately decided to just keep living at home. The subletter moved out.
About 5 weeks ago, I posted online that I was looking for a subletter to take over asap. My roommate texted me right after; she had gotten a notification for that post. She was upset that I had not told her beforehand and that she had to find out through an online post; she said she thought that we were closer than that. I felt really bad hearing this, since I really did not mean to hurt her feelings. I had thought to myself that I should tell her if I found someone that was interested in the place, but that I wouldn't need to say anything if I didn't even have a person that would want to move-in. Now I realize this was backwards and I should have alerted her that I was looking for someone. Truly though, I had not known myself that I wasn't coming back for more than a few days when I made that post, so I didn't even have the ability to have given her much of a heads up like she had hoped for, as I did not know myself.
I had the full intention of telling her I was going to get a subletter once I had found a person, so I had no intention of not telling her at all, of course. Quite the opposite, I would never have thought to move someone in without first talking to her about it, since she lives there and deserves to know. I just didn't think it really mattered if I told her after I had found a person or beforehand, but I see now that this was a source of hurt for her and I am sorry I made a choice that brought her this hurt. I've reached out to her three times now with an apologetic sentiment asking if we could talk about it, but all my messages have been ignored.
I have not even moved anyone in; at this point I have been paying my rent there for 2.5 months and will not move anyone in until everyone goes home for the summer, so I am not going to be making her live with a stranger like she was worried about. I have and have never had any intention of putting her in an uncomfortable situation. But, she has still been ignoring me for 5 weeks now over this. I really cherished her friendship, and I am confused because we were incredibly close. I know what I did must have really hurt her, but this is really hurting me now. I don't think what I did was a reason to completely stonewall and give me the silent treatment. I wish she could be a bit more empathetic to my situation (struggling with my wellbeing and being unable to continue in university for the year despite wanting to, being stuck in an expensive lease despite not living in the place).
I'm just really upset over this, and I don't understand how someone that I considered such a close and dear friend could feel ready to ice me out in this way. I've told my friends and family about this, and all of them are saying it's unfair that she's reacting this way when finding someone to take over for you after moving out is normal behavior, and everyone I've shared this with has told me that it really isn't a big deal that I posted that before telling her, since it's normal to scope out interest before saying something about it. I honestly just didn't think it was a big deal in the moment and this reaction feels incredibly harsh. I thought I was over it but tonight brought up a lot of feelings of anxiety for me over the situation, and it's hard not to feel like everyone hates me right now when I remember that she was ready to throw away a close friendship over something like this. I really struggle with receiving the silent treatment and it just feels so harsh for what I've done, which really isn't much of anything.
2024.06.02 06:14 Future-Cold3850 First day is Monday
After years of experience behind the wheel of a forklift, and about a month or so doing doordash..I figured, why not try Amazon delivering. My plan is simple, get as much experience as I can, then once I get enough time, a few holidays and some extensive hours to make some bread, I plan to use those skills and go to either FedEx or UPS.
I have no idea what I'm getting into, even after reading all the different perspectives.. my question for the hustlers, the go getters, the ones who have a plan...
Is this really the worse job? I mean..when the guy delivers my package, he doesn't look like he hates his life..
I'm here for the money..not to fuck off. Are the checks lookin good? OT? ANY positive perspectives would be appreciated
submitted by Future-Cold3850 to AmazonDSPDrivers [link] [comments]
I have no idea what I'm getting into, even after reading all the different perspectives.. my question for the hustlers, the go getters, the ones who have a plan...
Is this really the worse job? I mean..when the guy delivers my package, he doesn't look like he hates his life..
I'm here for the money..not to fuck off. Are the checks lookin good? OT? ANY positive perspectives would be appreciated
2024.06.02 06:02 Less_Cardiologist671 Neurodivergent Sim Mod is a game changer
 | So I played as Morgyn Ember and it shows that Morgyn is a neurodivergent sim as soon as he spawned in Glimmerbrook. After that, he's struggling a bit and he goes to the psychiatrist to have an evaluation. Then, he comes home with this result. submitted by Less_Cardiologist671 to thesims [link] [comments] (btw, I edit him a bit on CAS and I used the old premade version of him before the latest patch from Gallery, giving him a little makeover & now I have two Morgyns in my game: the Sage one and this one that I played) |
2024.06.02 06:02 Choice_Evidence1983 My husband got a vasectomy and didn’t tell me
I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/Capable_Goal_6116
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
My husband got a vasectomy and didn’t tell me
Trigger Warnings: accusations of infidelity, emotional abuse and manipulation, betrayal
Original Post: May 18, 2024
Throwaway bc my husband knows my main. I don’t know what to do. My (31F) husband (32M) - fake name Chris, and I have been married for four years, together for six. When we first got together we had several long talks about how we both wanted a big family. I wanted to be very upfront that child free is not an option, and I said I wanted to have at least four kids. I’m an only child and know how lonely it is, I also said I wanted to have them about a yeayear and a half apart so they could grow up close.
He always wholeheartedly agreed to this and often made jokes like “whether we have 4 or 6, have as many as we want, it’s your call since you pretty much have to do all the work” and on our wedding day before we left the reception for our honeymoon he whispered “can we get outta here and get started on baby #1?” I loved how excited he seemed. To be clear I didn’t go off my BC until about two months after we were married and I got pregnant soon after with our first daughter Joy.
Joy was a happy pregnancy, long birth, but she was a beautiful, healthy baby. She went through colic which was trying, but other than that she was a happy first addition according to me. I noticed Chris became distant during my first pregnancy, but when I asked him about it he just said he had a lot in his mind being a new father. He said he was still excited, but something changed. For reference, we both work full time, I make about 20K more a year than him, and the five bedroom house that we live in was a gift from my mom who was very excited to be a grandma to many. My job is fully remote, but still offers maternity leave, and I have a nest egg savings for emergencies, and feel it’s important to mention this because I know finances can be a major stress factor when it comes to having kids, but not for me and Chris.
Then Joy came out perfectly, Chris had three months of paternity leave and was home with us for majority of that time. My mom visited a lot, and paid to have cleaners come. There were still a lot of long nights and it was tough for me to breastfeed, but overall nothing unexpected. Chris still seemed distant, but always helped with Joy. We have an agreed open phone policy, so I did check his phone quite often but didn’t find any sign of cheating. He goes through my phone whenever he wants too. I asked if he found me unattractive while pregnant and he assured me no, he loves me and he’s excited for our family.
Fast forward a year after, we’re sleeping through the night and I am back to work, saw my doctor and was cleared to try for bundle of joy #2, and Chris seemed very enthusiastic at this point. He even downloaded an app to track my fertility cycle so we could make the most of my ovulation times.
We had a lot of fun and he was always very passionate, but six months of trying with no pregnancy I started to worry. I’d voice my concerns and Chris would brush them off, so I tried to be patient, but then almost two years passed and Joy is growing up by herself.
I broke down to my mother crying and she agreed to come with me to the doctor to get checked out. I was very emotional and scared, but the doctor assured me everything is fine and that I should be able to conceive without any issues.
I went to Chris with this knowledge and he was very upset I went to a fertility specialist. I explained I thought something might have gone wrong during my last pregnancy, concerned that I was maybe blocked or infertile somehow. He said why not wait and “just let nature take its course” and I said “our little girl is almost three, and growing up by herself.” I reminded him of our plans and he just nodded and said all we can do is try. I asked if he would see a fertility specialist and he got angry, saying there’s nothing wrong with him and we don’t have the money for fertility treatments anyway. This confused me since we do have money, we have my savings and are doing pretty well.
When he went to sleep I decided to go through his phone again and went back through his calendar and call logs. I noticed about eight months after Joy was born there was a blocked day indicating he’d taken off from work, but it was in the middle of the week and I don’t remember any sort of special occasions behind why he’d take this random day off. I went through the call logs and found an office number about a week before and when I googled the number a local business where you could get a vasectomy appeared! I couldn’t believe what I was looking at. I instantly felt cold all over then started to panic.
I woke him up and confronted him. He just stared at me while I went off and admitted babies were harder than he thought and he felt like my first pregnancy took forever.
I couldn’t believe it. I packed my things, Joy and her things and drove to my mom’s house. She is in distress with my sudden appearance and my inability to stop crying. I finally told her yesterday morning what happened and she’s just beside herself. I don’t know what to do, but every time I think about how during sex Chris would talk to me about giving me a baby and he’d had the vasectomy the entire time. I feel so disgusted and stupid. I can’t believe my little girl is going to grow up alone. Chris has been blowing up my phone, but I just keep letting it ring and haven’t read any of his texts.
Edit: to those saying I “coerced” my “poor husband” into agreeing to a big family, nope. I was always open and honest about my dreams, told him it’s okay if he wanted different things, and he not only repetitively agreed and accepted, he also helped me plan, nest, put together the nursery and enthusiastically participated in conversations regarding having multiple children around friends and family, and always said we’d have at least 4. That was our number. Him getting a vasectomy behind my back was a complete shock.
Also, we’ve both always agreed to the open phone policy. I never “betrayed his trust” by going through his phone since I always had his consent to do so and he has mine. We even have the same phone pass code. I never wanted to be in a relationship where we kept secrets from each other. I know other couples feel different, but this is another thing he always 100% claimed he agreed with me on.
I vaguely remember one week where he actually turned me down for sex claiming he had a “head cold” and he didn’t join me in the shower like usual during that time, but I didn’t think anything about it. And no, men never need a wife’s signature to get vasectomy.
Comments
FantasticAnus: There's nothing wrong with child number one changing his mind, but he should have been open and honest about that and said that he wouldn't be having any more children, and then it would have been up to you as to whether you could live with that, or move on from him.
What he did, however, was duplicitous and manipulative. I don't think I could stay with a man who was so willing to keep such an enormous lie from me, one which impacts me, my daughter and my future enormously.
MyUsernameIsMehh: He has every right to not want more kids, you have every right to want more.
What he did not have the right to do was fool you for years. Men who have had vasectomies but hide it and "try for a baby" are beyond disgusting. Their wives think something is wrong with them, they go to specialists and sometimes spend a LOT of money on fertility treatments.
He's a spineless little shit (pardon my words, but it's true) who pushed you to have breakdowns over this.
He had every right to get a vasectomy, he didn't need your permission, but he had NO RIGHT to hide it and pretend you two were trying for another child.
Update: May 24, 2024
Some of you made some comments about my mom gifting my husband and I a house, paying for occasional cleaning services implying that Chris feels somehow emasculated by this, also implying I am “too financially dependent on my mom.” I make very good money, I have a sizable savings and don’t need any help, my mom was excited to buy this house for us as a wedding present. My dad passed away when I was young, he was wealthy and left my mom everything, so she shares his love since I’m her only kid. I make more money than Chris and always have. Yes his name is on the house, so yeah I’m gonna get screwed over in the divorce.
Some of you complained I “broke his trust” by going through his phone. He goes through my phone too. We have the same passcode. Some comments called this agreement between us unhinged, which to me is bizarre. Chris, I thought, was my soulmate, my husband and best friend. We don’t have secrets. I thought. Isn’t that the whole point of marriage? To finally have one person in the whole world you can tell everything to? To always be on the same team? Obviously I was wrong, and as many of you pointed out, that kind of love, trust and openness doesn’t really exist, and none of that matters now.
Chris and Joy seemed fine to me, but in hindsight there’s always been a hesitation on his part. I always thought it was just typical since the short while my dad was alive in my life I don’t really remember him being affectionate or warm. He was nice and played with me sometimes, but I don’t remember being held by him very much. I asked Chris many times if everything was okay when I noticed he was distant. He always said things were great, and give an excuse; just tired, work is draining, no big deal.
We’re in the US, and here a man can go get a vasectomy at any time. I don’t know what Chris told his doctor. For all I know he took his wedding ring off and gave a sob story, or probably just walked in and asked for the procedure. It doesn’t matter.
I’m really thankful for my mother. She’s heartbroken for me, and like many of you, she already knows my marriage is over. There’s been a lot of long nights of me crying that she’s endured.
I’m numb when I’m not crying, and keep getting this creepy feeling that nothing matters. We’re getting a divorce. I finally called Chris and he sobbed he was sorry, said he might be able to get it reversed. I’ve read a lot about vasectomies since my last post, and sometimes it can’t be reversed. It’s always a risk.
Again, it doesn’t matter. It’s not actually about the vasectomy. It’s that the person who I thought was the one person in the world that I could trust, that I was on the same page as, literally writing the book together, made this decision without me and kept it from me and the lied for years. I really thought what we had was true love. Now I’m pretty certain that doesn’t even exist.
Chris has not offered any explanation. He cried, begged my forgiveness and said again that he could get it reversed. Even if he can, the rest is irreversible. He never once answered my question. It’s really painful to talk to him, so after three times of asking and him each time dodging answering, and begging forgiveness, I finally just said to please leave the house and told him he’d hear from my lawyer.
He texted that he’s packed and left, and I haven’t heard from him since. He never once asked about Joy.
My lawyer says I might wind up paying alimony, but I might be able to get the house since it was a gift from my mother and Chris has never made any financial contribution. He also says Chris committed a kind of infidelity since he went behind my back to have this life altering procedure and admitted it, so that might help me.
To everyone telling me it’s gonna be okay, and I can still have more children…all of that seems impossible right now. My heart is broken. I’ve never experienced such sadness and the only relief is when I’m playing with my daughter. Her happiness is infectious. She is blissfully unaware, having the time of her life at grandma’s, but unlike her father she actually asks where’s da da?
I called work and took a medical leave of absence. I found a therapist.
My mom has offered to stay with me for a while, as well as hire a nanny.
Comments
BrightAd306: I agree with you. It’s not the vasectomy. It’s lying about it and defrauding you. Wanting your money, but not being a true partner.
Listen to your lawyer. Do what he says, and you’ll come out the other side. Even if you pay alimony, it won’t be forever
DangerNoodleDandy: I agree. The vasectomy and the fact that he hid it are a symptom of a greater issue.
submitted by Choice_Evidence1983 to BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
My husband got a vasectomy and didn’t tell me
Trigger Warnings: accusations of infidelity, emotional abuse and manipulation, betrayal
Throwaway bc my husband knows my main. I don’t know what to do. My (31F) husband (32M) - fake name Chris, and I have been married for four years, together for six. When we first got together we had several long talks about how we both wanted a big family. I wanted to be very upfront that child free is not an option, and I said I wanted to have at least four kids. I’m an only child and know how lonely it is, I also said I wanted to have them about a yeayear and a half apart so they could grow up close.
He always wholeheartedly agreed to this and often made jokes like “whether we have 4 or 6, have as many as we want, it’s your call since you pretty much have to do all the work” and on our wedding day before we left the reception for our honeymoon he whispered “can we get outta here and get started on baby #1?” I loved how excited he seemed. To be clear I didn’t go off my BC until about two months after we were married and I got pregnant soon after with our first daughter Joy.
Joy was a happy pregnancy, long birth, but she was a beautiful, healthy baby. She went through colic which was trying, but other than that she was a happy first addition according to me. I noticed Chris became distant during my first pregnancy, but when I asked him about it he just said he had a lot in his mind being a new father. He said he was still excited, but something changed. For reference, we both work full time, I make about 20K more a year than him, and the five bedroom house that we live in was a gift from my mom who was very excited to be a grandma to many. My job is fully remote, but still offers maternity leave, and I have a nest egg savings for emergencies, and feel it’s important to mention this because I know finances can be a major stress factor when it comes to having kids, but not for me and Chris.
Then Joy came out perfectly, Chris had three months of paternity leave and was home with us for majority of that time. My mom visited a lot, and paid to have cleaners come. There were still a lot of long nights and it was tough for me to breastfeed, but overall nothing unexpected. Chris still seemed distant, but always helped with Joy. We have an agreed open phone policy, so I did check his phone quite often but didn’t find any sign of cheating. He goes through my phone whenever he wants too. I asked if he found me unattractive while pregnant and he assured me no, he loves me and he’s excited for our family.
Fast forward a year after, we’re sleeping through the night and I am back to work, saw my doctor and was cleared to try for bundle of joy #2, and Chris seemed very enthusiastic at this point. He even downloaded an app to track my fertility cycle so we could make the most of my ovulation times.
We had a lot of fun and he was always very passionate, but six months of trying with no pregnancy I started to worry. I’d voice my concerns and Chris would brush them off, so I tried to be patient, but then almost two years passed and Joy is growing up by herself.
I broke down to my mother crying and she agreed to come with me to the doctor to get checked out. I was very emotional and scared, but the doctor assured me everything is fine and that I should be able to conceive without any issues.
I went to Chris with this knowledge and he was very upset I went to a fertility specialist. I explained I thought something might have gone wrong during my last pregnancy, concerned that I was maybe blocked or infertile somehow. He said why not wait and “just let nature take its course” and I said “our little girl is almost three, and growing up by herself.” I reminded him of our plans and he just nodded and said all we can do is try. I asked if he would see a fertility specialist and he got angry, saying there’s nothing wrong with him and we don’t have the money for fertility treatments anyway. This confused me since we do have money, we have my savings and are doing pretty well.
When he went to sleep I decided to go through his phone again and went back through his calendar and call logs. I noticed about eight months after Joy was born there was a blocked day indicating he’d taken off from work, but it was in the middle of the week and I don’t remember any sort of special occasions behind why he’d take this random day off. I went through the call logs and found an office number about a week before and when I googled the number a local business where you could get a vasectomy appeared! I couldn’t believe what I was looking at. I instantly felt cold all over then started to panic.
I woke him up and confronted him. He just stared at me while I went off and admitted babies were harder than he thought and he felt like my first pregnancy took forever.
I couldn’t believe it. I packed my things, Joy and her things and drove to my mom’s house. She is in distress with my sudden appearance and my inability to stop crying. I finally told her yesterday morning what happened and she’s just beside herself. I don’t know what to do, but every time I think about how during sex Chris would talk to me about giving me a baby and he’d had the vasectomy the entire time. I feel so disgusted and stupid. I can’t believe my little girl is going to grow up alone. Chris has been blowing up my phone, but I just keep letting it ring and haven’t read any of his texts.
Edit: to those saying I “coerced” my “poor husband” into agreeing to a big family, nope. I was always open and honest about my dreams, told him it’s okay if he wanted different things, and he not only repetitively agreed and accepted, he also helped me plan, nest, put together the nursery and enthusiastically participated in conversations regarding having multiple children around friends and family, and always said we’d have at least 4. That was our number. Him getting a vasectomy behind my back was a complete shock.
Also, we’ve both always agreed to the open phone policy. I never “betrayed his trust” by going through his phone since I always had his consent to do so and he has mine. We even have the same phone pass code. I never wanted to be in a relationship where we kept secrets from each other. I know other couples feel different, but this is another thing he always 100% claimed he agreed with me on.
I vaguely remember one week where he actually turned me down for sex claiming he had a “head cold” and he didn’t join me in the shower like usual during that time, but I didn’t think anything about it. And no, men never need a wife’s signature to get vasectomy.
Comments
FantasticAnus: There's nothing wrong with child number one changing his mind, but he should have been open and honest about that and said that he wouldn't be having any more children, and then it would have been up to you as to whether you could live with that, or move on from him.
What he did, however, was duplicitous and manipulative. I don't think I could stay with a man who was so willing to keep such an enormous lie from me, one which impacts me, my daughter and my future enormously.
MyUsernameIsMehh: He has every right to not want more kids, you have every right to want more.
What he did not have the right to do was fool you for years. Men who have had vasectomies but hide it and "try for a baby" are beyond disgusting. Their wives think something is wrong with them, they go to specialists and sometimes spend a LOT of money on fertility treatments.
He's a spineless little shit (pardon my words, but it's true) who pushed you to have breakdowns over this.
He had every right to get a vasectomy, he didn't need your permission, but he had NO RIGHT to hide it and pretend you two were trying for another child.
Update: May 24, 2024
Some of you made some comments about my mom gifting my husband and I a house, paying for occasional cleaning services implying that Chris feels somehow emasculated by this, also implying I am “too financially dependent on my mom.” I make very good money, I have a sizable savings and don’t need any help, my mom was excited to buy this house for us as a wedding present. My dad passed away when I was young, he was wealthy and left my mom everything, so she shares his love since I’m her only kid. I make more money than Chris and always have. Yes his name is on the house, so yeah I’m gonna get screwed over in the divorce.
Some of you complained I “broke his trust” by going through his phone. He goes through my phone too. We have the same passcode. Some comments called this agreement between us unhinged, which to me is bizarre. Chris, I thought, was my soulmate, my husband and best friend. We don’t have secrets. I thought. Isn’t that the whole point of marriage? To finally have one person in the whole world you can tell everything to? To always be on the same team? Obviously I was wrong, and as many of you pointed out, that kind of love, trust and openness doesn’t really exist, and none of that matters now.
Chris and Joy seemed fine to me, but in hindsight there’s always been a hesitation on his part. I always thought it was just typical since the short while my dad was alive in my life I don’t really remember him being affectionate or warm. He was nice and played with me sometimes, but I don’t remember being held by him very much. I asked Chris many times if everything was okay when I noticed he was distant. He always said things were great, and give an excuse; just tired, work is draining, no big deal.
We’re in the US, and here a man can go get a vasectomy at any time. I don’t know what Chris told his doctor. For all I know he took his wedding ring off and gave a sob story, or probably just walked in and asked for the procedure. It doesn’t matter.
I’m really thankful for my mother. She’s heartbroken for me, and like many of you, she already knows my marriage is over. There’s been a lot of long nights of me crying that she’s endured.
I’m numb when I’m not crying, and keep getting this creepy feeling that nothing matters. We’re getting a divorce. I finally called Chris and he sobbed he was sorry, said he might be able to get it reversed. I’ve read a lot about vasectomies since my last post, and sometimes it can’t be reversed. It’s always a risk.
Again, it doesn’t matter. It’s not actually about the vasectomy. It’s that the person who I thought was the one person in the world that I could trust, that I was on the same page as, literally writing the book together, made this decision without me and kept it from me and the lied for years. I really thought what we had was true love. Now I’m pretty certain that doesn’t even exist.
Chris has not offered any explanation. He cried, begged my forgiveness and said again that he could get it reversed. Even if he can, the rest is irreversible. He never once answered my question. It’s really painful to talk to him, so after three times of asking and him each time dodging answering, and begging forgiveness, I finally just said to please leave the house and told him he’d hear from my lawyer.
He texted that he’s packed and left, and I haven’t heard from him since. He never once asked about Joy.
My lawyer says I might wind up paying alimony, but I might be able to get the house since it was a gift from my mother and Chris has never made any financial contribution. He also says Chris committed a kind of infidelity since he went behind my back to have this life altering procedure and admitted it, so that might help me.
To everyone telling me it’s gonna be okay, and I can still have more children…all of that seems impossible right now. My heart is broken. I’ve never experienced such sadness and the only relief is when I’m playing with my daughter. Her happiness is infectious. She is blissfully unaware, having the time of her life at grandma’s, but unlike her father she actually asks where’s da da?
I called work and took a medical leave of absence. I found a therapist.
My mom has offered to stay with me for a while, as well as hire a nanny.
Comments
BrightAd306: I agree with you. It’s not the vasectomy. It’s lying about it and defrauding you. Wanting your money, but not being a true partner.
Listen to your lawyer. Do what he says, and you’ll come out the other side. Even if you pay alimony, it won’t be forever
DangerNoodleDandy: I agree. The vasectomy and the fact that he hid it are a symptom of a greater issue.
DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP
2024.06.02 06:01 Direct-Caterpillar77 I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband (New Update)
I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Complex-Wing7114
I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband
Originally posted to offmychest
Thanks to u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU
Previous BoRU
TRIGGER WARNING: controlling behavior, threats, abusive behavior, stalking, assault, physical violence, gaslighting
Original Post Apr 27, 2024
Throwaway account as my husband and In-laws are follow my main. I, 29 F, have been married to my husband, 30 m, who I'll call Alex. Alex and I met in college during our freshman year. We started off as just friends, and got married seven months ago. I've gotten along with his family, but we aren't super close but we're friendly enough. The problem is that Alex has begun to make me incredibly uncomfortable.
Firstly, he's begun to ask me who I'm meeting with, where, what we plan on doing, how long every single time I leave the house without him. At first, I just thought he was being protective and a good partner just in case something happened, but then he started checking my phone after the visits, vetting and researching each of my friends as well.
He also has been pursuing me to link my bank account to his, as he's "in charge" of the finances when he was perfectly fine with keeping them separate before. We fight about it almost every day.
Finally, yesterday when he was preparing to go on a work trip for two weeks in California, he demanded I wear a tracker so he could keep and eye on me while he's gone. I can't do this anymore, I feel like I'm suffocating and his family who I've spoken to about his worrying behavior just said he's being careful and protective as a good husband should. I need to gather my things together and find a way to be gone before he gets home without tipping him off.
He's always threatened that if he ever found me cheating on him he'd turn in divorce papers the same day. He keeps a filled out copy in his desk. I'm going to submit those the day I leave. But there's so much to do, bergen finding a new place to live, seeing if my job has any transfers available, packing and moving in two weeks. His return flight May 11th, so I need to move quickly. I'm posting here because I don't have any close family, and I can't risk dragging my friends into this as we share the same friends.I just needed a place to vent, and ask if anyone has any advice on the easiest and safest way to do this?
Edit: oh my god you guys are amazing! I never even thought to not use his divorce papers. I'll check for cameras before I start any packing or prepping. I may also shred his divorce papers just in case and look into getting a lawyer for myself. I'm in a no fault divorce state, that much I so remember which will help. I'll update again when I know more. The tracker he wants me to use is a small clip to put on the belt or waistband. I'll wear it unless I'm going or doing something related to me leaving. No pets yet thankfully.
Update Apr 28, 2024
So I've gotten a lot of support and helpful advice along with questions I thought I should clarify before I proceed with the update. Some asked why I'd be 'hiding' things from Alex regarding going out and who I'm meeting with. I don't, and I have nothing to hide. However when he begins to then double check everything I tell him with the other people there right down to each person I talked to and what I said. Did I send any text msgs, did I order food, how much did I eat, that's when it started to feel like I was slowly being pushed into a corner. It didn't start that bad, but gradually grew worse overtime.
All of the Reddit subs my in-law's families are part of are related gardening and diy so I highly doubt they'll see this, if so by the time they do, I'll hopefully be gone. I talked to my job and explained things to my manager. And they promised to look into openings in other states to see if they could get me into one. They'll have an update on that in three days. I trust that my bank account us secured, considering he's tried to get into it before and failed. I found one camera in the kitchen, another in the living room and one in our bedroom. As such, I've left them in place for now and done all other planning, either in the bathroom pretending I'm taking a bath.
I'm honestly staying away from the domestic violence services as my sister-in-law is unfortunately higher up in those considering she volunteers there and I have a feeling if I did show up there, they would know in a heartbeat. I can't look for apartments until I get the update from my work, but either or i'm still gonna be leaving the state. The day before I do I will be changing my number carrier and wiping my laptop and all of his electronics before I do.
I've met with 2 lawyers so far and had them look over the paperwork. My husband had prepared and both said that it did it have some clauses in it. That could have caused me some trouble down the line. What alarmed all of us close the fact that several of those clauses dealt with future children, and not as a hypothetical. Like several hair suggested I have a feeling he fully intended on getting me pregnant to keep me trapped and tied to him.
There are 3 other locations. My job could send me to and I have. As a precaution Begun looking into all 3 cities and housing in the areas. Just in case one of those, this is the one they send me to. Even if they don't have an opening that they can push me into then I will just have to quit, move and figure things out on my own. I have enough money to live and survive for a few months until I can pick up another job.
Unfortunately all of our friends are mutuals and would likely be unaware of the consequences of saying or sharing anything I do or say with my husband. I don't have any surviving close family and obviously my in laws are not a good resource to rely on. I am on my own unfortunately, other than the wonderful bonds, i've begun to make here. I will update again if I get more information or something else happens. Otherwise all update when my work gets back to me. I do plan on leaving before he returns, though. Just to make sure that i'm not anywhere near here at that time.
Update 2 Apr 30, 2024
Good news! My work has an opening I qualify for that will not only shift me across the country, but also comes with a salary increase as well. I've started telling my in laws and friends that I'm planning a surprise outing for when my husband gets back for just the two of us. This way, people don't give me odd looks if they see me out and about. I've even gone as far as asking MIL to show me his favorite recipes.
Meanwhile, I've found a moving company that while small is willing to work in a storm. The reason is in five days, we're supposed to get hit with a large storm front. I plan to shut off the breaker and say we lost power if he asks just as several people here suggested and even send him a short clip of the storm.
I will have all of my stuff moved that afternoon, and I will be flying out once the weather has cleared enough to do so. I have a lawyer who will push my divorce through, and I've filled out the necessary paperwork so that I don't have to be here for it. I'm not suing for assets or alimony and I've shredded his divorce papers as well. I've set up a cheap payphone plan through cricket until this is all said and done at which point I will find a new carrier, number and phone. This one is being wiped and left behind.
My laptop is provided by my work, and the IT department inspected it thoroughly and it was clean thankfully. No other electronic aside from my laptop and new phone will be coming with me. If alex needs to talk to me, he can do it through my lawyer. Not sure if anything else will happen, my fingers are crossed that he doesn't think anythings amiss until after I leave - and I'm not turning the breaker back on when I do. He can when he gets home. My work is covering the plane ticket, so that at least is one expense I don't have to finagle in.
Update 3 May 7, 2024
Update 3: I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband.
It's been a busy week, but I've gotten so much done. Firstly, I am now out of the house and am currently in a hotel while I look for an apartment. It's a big city, bustling with people no matter where you look. We had a pretty bad storm system hit back home, that actually lasted two days. High winds, thunder, lightning and even hail everywhere. I didn't take much from the house, my documents, clothes and important sentimental items. I left all of the furniture and electronics behind. I cleaned the house top to bottom and took pictures on my phone so he couldn't claim I damaged anything when I left.
My lawyer has already started divorce proceedings, and my husband will be served on the 8th. His plane is due to land early morning, and the sheriff will be there at the house waiting for him. He is very much about public appearances and reputation. My lawyer will be calling him as well to inform him that I am more than willing to air out everything to the public about his actions if it means securing my freedom from him. I will go to court as long as I must to get this pushed through.
I haven't told our friends or his in-laws yet, I will do that while he is on the flight to prevent him from getting wind of it before he's handed the divorce papers. I will be calling around and explaining why we're getting divorced, to try and prevent him from twisting this into somehow being my fault. I don't want him trying to claim I had an affair or something so I want to get the truth out before he can twist this.
I'm... doing okay. I'm tired, but yet I feel almost jittery and off-kilter. I keep looking over my shoulder and monitoring what I say even when I don't really need to anymore. Hopefully that will fade soon. My work is covering the cost of the hotel, and I'm working on getting my other things in order. I also need to find a new GP as I want to get a full test just to make sure everything is okay. I don't know when my next update will be, probably when the divorce papers are filed or if we have to go to court to push them through. I will try to keep my head up, but it feels like I'm in a whirlwind or something with so many things to do and think about. I kinda thought it would be easier once I got out of the house but while the fear is smaller, somehow the number of tasks only seems to have grown.
Update 4 May 14, 2024
Sorry I haven't updated for a while, things got hectic and a bit chaotic honestly. Firstly, I'm working on getting an apartment still and have applications in at three different places and will hopefully hear back from them soon. I'm still going into work here at the new location, so I don't have to worry about burning through my emergency savings completely. I've gotten a lot of emails from Alex, his family and our old friend group asking question after question. I have only sent one return email to Alex, explaining that I don't believe we are truly compatible, and it is best we separate now. That his treatment of me when I'd done nothing to deserve as such was just as much of a deal breaker as cheating was for him.
I ended the email with the statement that I would not be contacting him further and anything else he needed to pass on to me or vice versa would be done through my lawyer. For his family and friends, I just typed up one email outlining everything that had happened and why I left. I told them I wished them no ill will, but that such treatment of his wife and partner was not acceptable. That should Alex get remarried in the future, I wished they would help support both partners and not just Alex.
Alex, from what my lawyer told me, was livid when he was served. The sheriff actually ended up booking him for assault on an officer and menacing due to the threats he was shouting. His father bailed him out in a few hours, but with the testimony of the sheriff, my lawyer believes I have a very good chance at getting a restraining order. Alex, upon returning to the house, apparently lost his temper again, breaking the dining table into pieces as well as the tv, and putting several holes in the walls. At least that's what one of the emails from one of our friends reported as Alex called him to help him clean up the mess.
My lawyer already has pictures of the house I took, with timestamps as evidence nothing had been damaged by me. My friend reported that Alex tried to claim I'd been the one to trash the house but the holes in the wall were at head height - Alex is 6'3", and I'm 5'4" so he knew that was false. Either way, taking the pictures definitely will help me so again thank you everyone here for the advice because I never would have thought of that on my own. My work won't share details of where I am, as I do work with some higher end clientele who value security and that information won't be gossiped about and no, I'm not some stripper or escort. I deal with contracts, notary and business management. As such, even if Alex tried to use my work to find me, he wouldn't succeed.
It’s been a little bit, and I thought I’d answer some questions before giving my update. It may be a while after this until things change.
Firstly, No I didn’t bring my car. The public transport here is good enough to use without needing one. I have secured an apartment, and the building has good security. You need a key card to enter, and there is a security guard at a desk right by the entrance to the building. As part of my contract, I gave them a photo of Alex and his family so that even in the off chance they do find me, they won’t be let in.
The responses I got from the emails varied. His family said I was overreacting, and that I owe Alex an apology for the problems this has caused him. The pending criminal charges puts him at risk of losing his job if he’s convicted. Alex sent a long email, apologizing and pleading for me to come home. He said he was worried for me, that he is willing to go to therapy if it will appease me. He wants us to remain together, and he didn’t think leaving was an appropriate response to his genuine concern and worry for my health and safety. The friends gave somewhat lacking replies, saying that they didn’t think Alex was ever going to hurt me and that I shouldn’t be letting my imagination run away wild. As much as I want to say I was surprised by the lack of support, I’m honestly not.
He intends to fight the divorce. I am letting my lawyer handle it, and I am also pursuing a protective order as well. Once I got approved for my apartment, I also froze my credit. I’ve changed my phone carrier and number, as well as making sure none of my documents list Alex as next of kin or POA.
Some have asked why I was so paranoid about Alex and his possible future actions. The answer for that actually is somewhat simple – my grandmother. I loved that woman to bits. As a teen, she explained why my grandfather was never around. He was extremely abusive and manipulative, and her generation didn’t allow divorce really. She wouldn’t have been able to buy a house or get a good enough job to support her and my mother on her own. As such, she endured it, shielded my mom as she could until my grandfather died. When I felt like I may have been overreacting, I remembered how she’d said she’d always wished she’d been able to see grandfather for what he was early on when she may have been able to annul the marriage.
I don’t know when I’ll update again, maybe when the divorce goes through or if something big happens but until then, I’m just trying to keep my head above the water.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7
submitted by Direct-Caterpillar77 to BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]
I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband
Originally posted to offmychest
Thanks to u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU
Previous BoRU
TRIGGER WARNING: controlling behavior, threats, abusive behavior, stalking, assault, physical violence, gaslighting
Original Post Apr 27, 2024
Throwaway account as my husband and In-laws are follow my main. I, 29 F, have been married to my husband, 30 m, who I'll call Alex. Alex and I met in college during our freshman year. We started off as just friends, and got married seven months ago. I've gotten along with his family, but we aren't super close but we're friendly enough. The problem is that Alex has begun to make me incredibly uncomfortable.
Firstly, he's begun to ask me who I'm meeting with, where, what we plan on doing, how long every single time I leave the house without him. At first, I just thought he was being protective and a good partner just in case something happened, but then he started checking my phone after the visits, vetting and researching each of my friends as well.
He also has been pursuing me to link my bank account to his, as he's "in charge" of the finances when he was perfectly fine with keeping them separate before. We fight about it almost every day.
Finally, yesterday when he was preparing to go on a work trip for two weeks in California, he demanded I wear a tracker so he could keep and eye on me while he's gone. I can't do this anymore, I feel like I'm suffocating and his family who I've spoken to about his worrying behavior just said he's being careful and protective as a good husband should. I need to gather my things together and find a way to be gone before he gets home without tipping him off.
He's always threatened that if he ever found me cheating on him he'd turn in divorce papers the same day. He keeps a filled out copy in his desk. I'm going to submit those the day I leave. But there's so much to do, bergen finding a new place to live, seeing if my job has any transfers available, packing and moving in two weeks. His return flight May 11th, so I need to move quickly. I'm posting here because I don't have any close family, and I can't risk dragging my friends into this as we share the same friends.I just needed a place to vent, and ask if anyone has any advice on the easiest and safest way to do this?
Edit: oh my god you guys are amazing! I never even thought to not use his divorce papers. I'll check for cameras before I start any packing or prepping. I may also shred his divorce papers just in case and look into getting a lawyer for myself. I'm in a no fault divorce state, that much I so remember which will help. I'll update again when I know more. The tracker he wants me to use is a small clip to put on the belt or waistband. I'll wear it unless I'm going or doing something related to me leaving. No pets yet thankfully.
Update Apr 28, 2024
So I've gotten a lot of support and helpful advice along with questions I thought I should clarify before I proceed with the update. Some asked why I'd be 'hiding' things from Alex regarding going out and who I'm meeting with. I don't, and I have nothing to hide. However when he begins to then double check everything I tell him with the other people there right down to each person I talked to and what I said. Did I send any text msgs, did I order food, how much did I eat, that's when it started to feel like I was slowly being pushed into a corner. It didn't start that bad, but gradually grew worse overtime.
All of the Reddit subs my in-law's families are part of are related gardening and diy so I highly doubt they'll see this, if so by the time they do, I'll hopefully be gone. I talked to my job and explained things to my manager. And they promised to look into openings in other states to see if they could get me into one. They'll have an update on that in three days. I trust that my bank account us secured, considering he's tried to get into it before and failed. I found one camera in the kitchen, another in the living room and one in our bedroom. As such, I've left them in place for now and done all other planning, either in the bathroom pretending I'm taking a bath.
I'm honestly staying away from the domestic violence services as my sister-in-law is unfortunately higher up in those considering she volunteers there and I have a feeling if I did show up there, they would know in a heartbeat. I can't look for apartments until I get the update from my work, but either or i'm still gonna be leaving the state. The day before I do I will be changing my number carrier and wiping my laptop and all of his electronics before I do.
I've met with 2 lawyers so far and had them look over the paperwork. My husband had prepared and both said that it did it have some clauses in it. That could have caused me some trouble down the line. What alarmed all of us close the fact that several of those clauses dealt with future children, and not as a hypothetical. Like several hair suggested I have a feeling he fully intended on getting me pregnant to keep me trapped and tied to him.
There are 3 other locations. My job could send me to and I have. As a precaution Begun looking into all 3 cities and housing in the areas. Just in case one of those, this is the one they send me to. Even if they don't have an opening that they can push me into then I will just have to quit, move and figure things out on my own. I have enough money to live and survive for a few months until I can pick up another job.
Unfortunately all of our friends are mutuals and would likely be unaware of the consequences of saying or sharing anything I do or say with my husband. I don't have any surviving close family and obviously my in laws are not a good resource to rely on. I am on my own unfortunately, other than the wonderful bonds, i've begun to make here. I will update again if I get more information or something else happens. Otherwise all update when my work gets back to me. I do plan on leaving before he returns, though. Just to make sure that i'm not anywhere near here at that time.
Update 2 Apr 30, 2024
Good news! My work has an opening I qualify for that will not only shift me across the country, but also comes with a salary increase as well. I've started telling my in laws and friends that I'm planning a surprise outing for when my husband gets back for just the two of us. This way, people don't give me odd looks if they see me out and about. I've even gone as far as asking MIL to show me his favorite recipes.
Meanwhile, I've found a moving company that while small is willing to work in a storm. The reason is in five days, we're supposed to get hit with a large storm front. I plan to shut off the breaker and say we lost power if he asks just as several people here suggested and even send him a short clip of the storm.
I will have all of my stuff moved that afternoon, and I will be flying out once the weather has cleared enough to do so. I have a lawyer who will push my divorce through, and I've filled out the necessary paperwork so that I don't have to be here for it. I'm not suing for assets or alimony and I've shredded his divorce papers as well. I've set up a cheap payphone plan through cricket until this is all said and done at which point I will find a new carrier, number and phone. This one is being wiped and left behind.
My laptop is provided by my work, and the IT department inspected it thoroughly and it was clean thankfully. No other electronic aside from my laptop and new phone will be coming with me. If alex needs to talk to me, he can do it through my lawyer. Not sure if anything else will happen, my fingers are crossed that he doesn't think anythings amiss until after I leave - and I'm not turning the breaker back on when I do. He can when he gets home. My work is covering the plane ticket, so that at least is one expense I don't have to finagle in.
Update 3 May 7, 2024
Update 3: I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband.
It's been a busy week, but I've gotten so much done. Firstly, I am now out of the house and am currently in a hotel while I look for an apartment. It's a big city, bustling with people no matter where you look. We had a pretty bad storm system hit back home, that actually lasted two days. High winds, thunder, lightning and even hail everywhere. I didn't take much from the house, my documents, clothes and important sentimental items. I left all of the furniture and electronics behind. I cleaned the house top to bottom and took pictures on my phone so he couldn't claim I damaged anything when I left.
My lawyer has already started divorce proceedings, and my husband will be served on the 8th. His plane is due to land early morning, and the sheriff will be there at the house waiting for him. He is very much about public appearances and reputation. My lawyer will be calling him as well to inform him that I am more than willing to air out everything to the public about his actions if it means securing my freedom from him. I will go to court as long as I must to get this pushed through.
I haven't told our friends or his in-laws yet, I will do that while he is on the flight to prevent him from getting wind of it before he's handed the divorce papers. I will be calling around and explaining why we're getting divorced, to try and prevent him from twisting this into somehow being my fault. I don't want him trying to claim I had an affair or something so I want to get the truth out before he can twist this.
I'm... doing okay. I'm tired, but yet I feel almost jittery and off-kilter. I keep looking over my shoulder and monitoring what I say even when I don't really need to anymore. Hopefully that will fade soon. My work is covering the cost of the hotel, and I'm working on getting my other things in order. I also need to find a new GP as I want to get a full test just to make sure everything is okay. I don't know when my next update will be, probably when the divorce papers are filed or if we have to go to court to push them through. I will try to keep my head up, but it feels like I'm in a whirlwind or something with so many things to do and think about. I kinda thought it would be easier once I got out of the house but while the fear is smaller, somehow the number of tasks only seems to have grown.
Update 4 May 14, 2024
Sorry I haven't updated for a while, things got hectic and a bit chaotic honestly. Firstly, I'm working on getting an apartment still and have applications in at three different places and will hopefully hear back from them soon. I'm still going into work here at the new location, so I don't have to worry about burning through my emergency savings completely. I've gotten a lot of emails from Alex, his family and our old friend group asking question after question. I have only sent one return email to Alex, explaining that I don't believe we are truly compatible, and it is best we separate now. That his treatment of me when I'd done nothing to deserve as such was just as much of a deal breaker as cheating was for him.
I ended the email with the statement that I would not be contacting him further and anything else he needed to pass on to me or vice versa would be done through my lawyer. For his family and friends, I just typed up one email outlining everything that had happened and why I left. I told them I wished them no ill will, but that such treatment of his wife and partner was not acceptable. That should Alex get remarried in the future, I wished they would help support both partners and not just Alex.
Alex, from what my lawyer told me, was livid when he was served. The sheriff actually ended up booking him for assault on an officer and menacing due to the threats he was shouting. His father bailed him out in a few hours, but with the testimony of the sheriff, my lawyer believes I have a very good chance at getting a restraining order. Alex, upon returning to the house, apparently lost his temper again, breaking the dining table into pieces as well as the tv, and putting several holes in the walls. At least that's what one of the emails from one of our friends reported as Alex called him to help him clean up the mess.
My lawyer already has pictures of the house I took, with timestamps as evidence nothing had been damaged by me. My friend reported that Alex tried to claim I'd been the one to trash the house but the holes in the wall were at head height - Alex is 6'3", and I'm 5'4" so he knew that was false. Either way, taking the pictures definitely will help me so again thank you everyone here for the advice because I never would have thought of that on my own. My work won't share details of where I am, as I do work with some higher end clientele who value security and that information won't be gossiped about and no, I'm not some stripper or escort. I deal with contracts, notary and business management. As such, even if Alex tried to use my work to find me, he wouldn't succeed.
NEW UPDATE
It’s been a little bit, and I thought I’d answer some questions before giving my update. It may be a while after this until things change.
Firstly, No I didn’t bring my car. The public transport here is good enough to use without needing one. I have secured an apartment, and the building has good security. You need a key card to enter, and there is a security guard at a desk right by the entrance to the building. As part of my contract, I gave them a photo of Alex and his family so that even in the off chance they do find me, they won’t be let in.
The responses I got from the emails varied. His family said I was overreacting, and that I owe Alex an apology for the problems this has caused him. The pending criminal charges puts him at risk of losing his job if he’s convicted. Alex sent a long email, apologizing and pleading for me to come home. He said he was worried for me, that he is willing to go to therapy if it will appease me. He wants us to remain together, and he didn’t think leaving was an appropriate response to his genuine concern and worry for my health and safety. The friends gave somewhat lacking replies, saying that they didn’t think Alex was ever going to hurt me and that I shouldn’t be letting my imagination run away wild. As much as I want to say I was surprised by the lack of support, I’m honestly not.
He intends to fight the divorce. I am letting my lawyer handle it, and I am also pursuing a protective order as well. Once I got approved for my apartment, I also froze my credit. I’ve changed my phone carrier and number, as well as making sure none of my documents list Alex as next of kin or POA.
Some have asked why I was so paranoid about Alex and his possible future actions. The answer for that actually is somewhat simple – my grandmother. I loved that woman to bits. As a teen, she explained why my grandfather was never around. He was extremely abusive and manipulative, and her generation didn’t allow divorce really. She wouldn’t have been able to buy a house or get a good enough job to support her and my mother on her own. As such, she endured it, shielded my mom as she could until my grandfather died. When I felt like I may have been overreacting, I remembered how she’d said she’d always wished she’d been able to see grandfather for what he was early on when she may have been able to annul the marriage.
I don’t know when I’ll update again, maybe when the divorce goes through or if something big happens but until then, I’m just trying to keep my head above the water.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7
2024.06.02 05:58 Similar_Cow5343 How to manage a overstimulated toddler who runs in to furniture hurting himself more than 10 - 20 times a day, accidentally all the time.
Hello my son is 2 years old this June. He is becoming a handful for me now. I am very upset bc I see family members kids so calm and collected and my own son going crazy. He gets stimulated in family gatherings a lot and starts running around hurting himself here and there and then when he gets tired he gets hysterical. Idk how to manage this behavior. He has been going to OT. I plan on sending him to a daycare.. how do I do this momming? So damn hard
submitted by Similar_Cow5343 to Autism_Parenting [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 05:55 fobreezee What worked for your bad eczema? Anyone mind sharing? UV Treatment or other advanced treatments?
I've dealt with eczema my whole life and am in my late 30s now. The last year or two, my hands and feet have gotten it really bad to the point I have to tape up my hands because they are all cut up. My dermatologist hasn't done anything more than prescribed me a steroid cream so far. I'm wondering what other treatments may be helpful.
In the past I've tried some kind of pill that has cleared it up for short periods, but my current dermatologist doesn't recommend that since it's bad for your bones and what not. I'm wondering if maybe it would be worth it to try to clear it up and hope it doesn't just come back right away though. I haven't done this in a long time. Has anyone taken a pill that has worked? I can't even remember the name of it.
Other than that, a dermatologist in the past recommended UV light treatment. I have a high deductible insurance plan, so for me I may be able to buy a device cheaper than going to the hospital to do it. Has anyone either gone to the hospital for treatment or use an at home device? How did it work for you?
If I missed any other treatment options that have worked for you, it would really be helpful. Thanks for any help.
submitted by fobreezee to eczema [link] [comments]
In the past I've tried some kind of pill that has cleared it up for short periods, but my current dermatologist doesn't recommend that since it's bad for your bones and what not. I'm wondering if maybe it would be worth it to try to clear it up and hope it doesn't just come back right away though. I haven't done this in a long time. Has anyone taken a pill that has worked? I can't even remember the name of it.
Other than that, a dermatologist in the past recommended UV light treatment. I have a high deductible insurance plan, so for me I may be able to buy a device cheaper than going to the hospital to do it. Has anyone either gone to the hospital for treatment or use an at home device? How did it work for you?
If I missed any other treatment options that have worked for you, it would really be helpful. Thanks for any help.