I normally avoid celeb shit, but have been going down the Nickelodeon rabbit hole of Quiet on Set, although well before as I have read allegations that were already out against Dan Daddy Schneider in the past. And the sexual undertones that were in these shows, such as Victorious, was apparent to me already.
Anyways it led me to Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. They remain out of the limelight etc now that they can control their decisions (most likely to a point, business-wise).
I watched Deep Dive’s youtube episode on them, and they were always uncomfortable and shy during interviews. They were so young, but also I imagine them being told what not to disclose when asked. So perhaps feeling uncomfortable in general when questioned, because there were rules.
On one Oprah episode, they were 17 and asked if they have to do chores for allowance. 150.00 - 200.00 a month each cash. At 17, after working non stop their entire lives. It was the dad who answered for them as they glanced at eachother. Like maybe less than that? The parents sold them to Hollywood as babies, and gaslit them. The mom wanted nothing to do with spotlight herself, and said it was like an accident they got the part and she didnt care. So the twins believe that they were not forced into it.
But it strikes me as odd, the interviews with them, and also twins Dylan and Cole Sprouse, one is always interrupting and answering with almost scripted response. To make sure nothing is leaked that shouldnt be?
Maybe one is a clone to act as an undercover handler in plain sight. Together they make the brand, separate they are nothing. And maybe the real one really believes they have a twin. And if they knew the truth, who would believe them ?
What if Amanda Bynes really was microchipped as she claimed to be through a tweet during her public “psychological breakdown!?” She said it made her say and do things. And she also claimed controversial photos of her werent real. They put her face on a body etc. well, we know deepfake is real. I think those in control of her wanted to script a breakdown to have the narrative that she is crazy therefore discredited when she speaks-up. That would in turn cause a real breakdown when no one believes you, but believes the ones abusing and controlling you. .
I think threats, nda’s signed via manipulation , and severe gaslighting and trauma has the truth still very hidden. When someone tries to talk, it is their own image ruined.
I think what we do know is gross. But i think the concepts are more dark than what actually goes public.
It could all be an initiation ritual. Dan S could be progressing in rank after enduring public humiliation and scrutiny. Reminiscent of my thoughts on Harvey Weinstein and Rose Mcgowan.
This is long but I have more thoughts too, depending on interest.

My fellow gamers, for too long has our community suffered the indignation of an intolerable culture that has denigrated, besmirched, exploited, and has outright demonized our culture of unique individuals with a genuine love of a hobby that they see as profitable and progressive. They have taken beloved IP’s (Intellectual Properties) and twisted them into their own personal ideological crusade of undermining and humiliating the core aspects of characters they deemed as “Toxic” or “White Supremacy”. Through the guise and protection of DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusivity) & ESG (Environmental, Social, and Governance) they have used our influence in the entertainment industry to push their narratives and agendas that have stigmatized our culture with numerous anti-consumer practices that they call “being progressive”. But the truth of the matter is they were never really looking to be a part of our community, they simply wanted to use our community as a tool of activism and propaganda in the entertainment industry as it was extremely profitable, and they wanted inclusion in that division. Ever since GamerGate & Female Frequency, we have had to endure the incursion of forced ideologies, xenophobic behaviors and inferior overpriced products that have never been in our best interest and have been flat out disgraceful towards foreign media.
Before Gaming had become a major source of entertainment, we were often categorized as anti-social or societies rejects where because we found more enjoyment in playing fictional characters and not spending as much time out and about, we never fully assimilated in society (which is a good thing if you ask me). From 1998 to 2007, at the height of innovation, creativity and production, Gaming had reached a golden age in which it had revolutionized society. Hollywood Execs who had ruined the movie industry turned their attention to video games as a source of income since video games had outperformed movies in terms of profit. No one was concerned about gaming, much less diversity or inclusivity until it became profitable. This makes people like SBI look extremely disingenuous as they were not interested in gamers as a community with its own culture. They simply wanted to use it as another weapon in identity politics.
Microtransactions; the hidden enemy to gamer progress and inducer to mental laziness of our community. Microtransactions have been around for a long time; however, it has never been more potent and apparent than in recent years. It has aided in the dismantling and segregation of players on the ideology of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) and has created another sub-culture of gamers who have no real drive to be better outside of how much money they put into the game. This has degraded our culture as well as we have become “fat” off transactional gaming but at the same time we have been “starved” of purposeful gaming where our achievements were our sustenance. I am not saying that microtransactions are bad, but when they are exploitative and predatorial like they have been and don’t give gamers room to grow, we become lethargic and unwilling to improve ourselves as gamers. Oversaturated microtransactional games are one of the many reasons why we have become complacent and unwilling to fight against the exploitative tactics used by big brand game companies such EA, Ubisoft, ActivisionBlizzard, NaughtyDog and so many other western business model companies. Western style games were not like this in the past, they had much more depth and actual effort put into them with the gamer in mind. This has not been the case for over a decade and our connection to western developers has been whittled down to just being transactional. That is one of the reasons why you see so many remasters and remakes in today’s gamer community. They have lost their willingness to improve as developers of games and simply accept corporate/share holder rules.
Game journalists also do not have any real integrity or purpose outside of being funded for their involvement in promoting IPG (Identity Political Games) in a positive light to the public whether it’s positively received or not. They are not interested in what we have to say, they all support the same agenda and that is why they are a dying breed. Within the next couple of years, they will be out of the job and more than likely they will not be able to stay in the industry giving how they have responded to past articles that have clearly been scripted on the premise of diversity and racism. Not only that, but most of them are also extremely hostile to the community as they stereotype and defame the individuals that are a part of the community they are supposed to serve. We have been mentally liberated from their lies and coercive tactics as we tend to laugh at their obvious attempt at virtue signaling while hiding their misdoings so that they can play the victim.
My gamer brothers & sisters, I would not suggest the following action that we must take now without good cause. I have weighed our options and the best option for us now is this…...CULTURAL SECESSION. Naturally this is a form of segregation where they would more than likely claim they are being segregated by the dominant culture of the gaming community but that is incorrect. For years now we have been the ones who are often marginalized and ostracized for the smaller portion of our community. And when we aren’t, we’re exploited for more funds so that these companies can stay in business only to subject us to low quality products that coincide with the “WOKE Agenda” that are often huge expenses to these big brands i.e. AAA/AAAA games that will eventually flop for its obvious forced diversity and bug infested product which will undoubtedly piss off the consumer to the point of wanting a refund. Losing copious amounts of capital and stock in the process, not to mention their reputation is permanently marred.
We must separate on every cultural level in terms of entertainment and ideology. We must reject everything from the west that promotes toxic western beliefs, practices, and exclusion from other cultures (i.e. Southeastern Countries such as Japan and Korea). Japan & Korea have been the targets of unjust discrimination from Western Developers, Western Journalists, Western Localizers (The Wokelizers) and Western Society Prejudice regarding their sense of aesthetics as Westerners hate the aesthetic sense of these countries. The reason why they resort to such base tactics isn’t just because it weaponizes the ideal female form but it’s also because they have deep-seated insecurities about their own looks so when they see attractive female characters, they use terms such as “unrealistic” or “hypersexualized” to establish the moral high ground. But the truth is, they want to feel superior to that which is ideal, so they insult and dehumanize this figure that portrays natural female beauty because they see it as an insult to their own social superiority in what they believe is a hierarchy of them being at the top of all other women. Because of this and so many contributing factors, their movies flop harder than the Fat Chocobo landing on a group of enemies and their games seismically fail just as much if not more. We must sever our connection to Western Developers, Publishers, and ALL Western-Centric Entertainment for they seek to mentally enslave us to their Xenophobic ideology.
Let’s define Western Culture and its traits. Western Culture/Society is composed of more than several different ideologies that work in unison with one another to facilitate dominance over multiple aspects of society. Business, Social, Political, Technological, and sometimes even Global Affairs are affected by these ideologies that portray a specific mindset of Western beliefs. What are those ideologies you ask?

• Perpetual Victimhood: By weaponizing the fact that they are marginalized and of a small portion of western society, they can push their agenda to absurd standards that ultimately ostracize the main demographic. And when companies don’t capitulate, they are labeled as anti-progressive/misogynist’s or cohorts of White Supremacy. They use this to cancel their targets and silence them through societal defamation to keep the public on their side. They also use this mindset to justify their own lack of self-agency as they tend to throw companies who do adhere to their demands but miserably fail to turn a profit under the bus so that they can maintain face in front of the public while denying their actual involvement. They will never accept “Sense of Agency” when it’s negative but will gladly accept it when a positive outcome shines on them as if they are entitled to it.

Official Wiki GamerGate Page)
​

• Societal Terrorism: This is another form of ideology weaponization that they use in order to make companies “toe-the-line” with their agenda. By weaponizing cancel culture, they exert dominance over these companies but in exchange they also reimburse those companies with DEI & ESG funds that raise their credit score as well as having social status with the marginalized demographic. However; cancel culture has not succeeded in years and developers and publishers probably only want the money and the DEI ESG rating. But they have to maintain the image of having social economic power so that they can continue to strong-arm other developers into compliance and promoting financial benefits of DEI & ESG. In other words, if you are not for sale, they discredit and stigmatize you in the industry.

Asmongold Clips.
https://youtu.be/Iq86DnmX2xY
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• “Its not us, its you who’s wrong” Mentality: This mentality is especially annoying as they tend to use it to hide their incompetence. They often look down upon gamers who are not in the industry to hide their obvious lack of knowledge on game development thinking that their job title grants them special status that they believe gives them the right to be condescending. But the truth they never wanted revealed has already strangled their careers of all credibility. They were never GAMERS, they were INVADERS. Community Colonists that seek to indoctrinate next generational gamers into their hive-mind and brand previous generations of gamers as villains.

@GeeksandGamers
https://youtu.be/1HbrTkqQFuM
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• Double-standard Enforcement: By labeling something as “unrealistic” or “hypersexualized”, they can claim this is morally wrong if it promotes traditional dynamics between men and women. Heterosexual relationships are condemned while at the same time Same-sex relationships are praised. Additionally, heterosexual relationships with main white male characters turn antagonistic and spotlight stealing. This is deliberate as to promote the “Girl Boss” ideology to indoctrinate women into the Feminazi state of mind. While at the same time, should a male character also adopt the “I don’t need male/female” ideology its seen as Toxic Masculinity which isn’t even a real thing. The idea of a strong male character is taboo while enforcing strong female characters is the ideal.

@MugenLord
https://youtu.be/to5Uciy_yeg
@EndymionTv
https://youtu.be/7TPTR8-qmbk
​

• Dehumanization/Demonization: This is something that most military branches use in order to remove conscious inhibitions such as mass slaughter is wrong or categorization. By enforcing ideologies to denounce humanity in certain targets, it deactivates your conscience by saying this is not human therefore its ethically okay to treat this target without compassion and deny the fact it has sentience. We gamers fall under this category for journalists, developers, companies and society at large. This is a tactic we are familiar with to an extent as it implies that we are not normal when we do not do what everybody else is doing. “Geeks are the worse” or “Nerds need to fall into a pit of lava” are verbal dehumanization forms that most people in society say and we as Gamers tend to be relegated to those categories. This is their way of imposing the social hierarchy on us by establishing superiority. We know this as Gamers as we see it very often in the games that we play and some times experience it in real life.

https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Gamergate#The_end_of_their_relevance
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• Deflection/Projection: This is basic psychology 101. By redirecting the conversation away from their mistakes and back on to the opposing view to avert blame and justify their innocence they can avoid criticism. However; deflection is a CONSCIOUS decision, meaning they have no real argument to justify their incompetence. If you can consciously process the situation, you have self-agency which means you don’t have a legitimate excuse. Projection is something else entirely. Most times, Projection doesn’t work on conscious decisions rather it is automatically deployed when feeling threatened, anxious or both. Instead of accepting accountability for feelings or actions that are deemed socially unacceptable they accuse others of committing that unacceptable behavior thereby exonerating themselves and proving that those feelings and/or actions are not their own.

@TheTrentReport
https://youtu.be/bPIPSKruYRo
These traits are so nefarious and unconscionable that I have a hard time believing that anyone could harbor them. However, given the social, political, and economic climate that we are in, those in power who use their influence on controlling society most definitely possess these insidious traits. Everything that they do is all about control and since video games are the biggest market in the world, they want control over it and the communities built around it to accrue more wealth and to use that wealth to subjugate other cultures. Mainstream media is a tool as well as mainstream organizations and sites to help accomplish this goal.
The government recently announced its intentions towards what they believe is “GamerGate 2.0” and now even the ADL has made an official appearance, referring to gamers as “extremist’s”. We know EXACTLY what they are doing, and they aren’t even trying to hide it anymore because they don’t think we are aware of their motives. This is just a pretext for them to exert even more control and we know why, it’s because they want the influence we as a community have to must serve them. So here is what we do my fellow gamers-
“In light of recent events and years of mainstream stigma, we the members of the Global Gaming Community [GGC] must officially renounce ALL TIES to the corporate western video game market. We have been financially exploited through predatorial monetization schemes, pelted with numerous articles of disdain and intentional misrepresentation from game journalists, news outlets regarding us as dangerous individuals and, even subjected to inferior products not only riddled with bugs but also products meant to push political agendas. For the preservation of our community and its unique culture, apart from a few select game development studios we officially sever all connections to western owned video game companies & their mainstream affiliates. From this point onward, we will no longer support western corporate developers, journalists and publishers that do not coincide with the goals of our community.”
Naturally this is completely optional. If you are okay with the state of the gaming community as it is, feel free to ignore this. But if you wish for real change and a break away from oversaturated monetization in the games you play and the push for radical ideological reform, then you are in the right place. Lets sever these rotted miasmic ties once and for all so that our community can be preserved and made better for future gamers. If you agree with this, share it with whoever you think might be interested. The more gamers who get involved, the easier it will be for us to finally break free from mainstream game companies and their associates.

Fresh from finishing Shogun, I was struck by how the show depicted Toranaga/Tokugawa as having some qualities of a political and social visionary. For example, he is convinced by the courtesan Gin to create the Edo pleasure district as a way of protecting courtesans, and he talks about how uniting the realm under a shogunate will bring peace.
My question is whether we have any evidence that Tokugawa Ieyasu articulated any personal political philosophy, like who should rule and how, beyond this idea that a strong central authority will bring security by maintaining order. Sengoku-era politics always seems so cynical, with Daimyos maneuvering for personal and family power against rivals despite ostensibly all being part of a unified state. Did Tokugawa transcend this cynicism in any way, or did he just centralize power around himself, and the dynasty of shoguns he created?

As discussed in the first post, this is my ongoing compilation of the remaining questions Christopher has answered online between August 1st 2023 and April 30th 2024 which I've not already covered in other compilations.
As always, questions are sorted by topic, and each Q&A is annotated with a bracketed source number. Links to every source used and to the other parts of this compilation will be provided in a comment below.
The previous post focused on Future Publications, though it skipped over the future projects which aren't really books. This installment will therefore focus on Movies and Adaptations, including of course, the Disney+ Eragon adaptation that is currently being worked on. The next post will focus on In-Universe Lore.

Movies and Adaptations

Low Budget Movie

I actually haven't spoken about this part publicly. I have this sort of bee in my bonnet that I've wanted to do for years, which is I want to try to write and direct a low budget film, there's a lot of talent here in the area in Montana where I live, and it's something I've always wanted to do, and I kinda of figure I'm at the age where if I don't try to do it it'll never happen. The barometer as to whether or not this happens will be entirely as to whether or not I can write a script that I'm happy with and that other people would be interested in helping make. If I can manage to write a script that works then I'm going to give it a real shot, if not I'll go back and write another book. [1]
It's very interesting that one of the first storytelling books that comes to your mind is the Robert McKee one. I've always been fascinated with film and I would love to make film at some point. I might actually make a real effort in that direction this year, we shall see. The thing is, we didn't have television reception growing up but we would rent movies and we would watch a film every evening with dinner. We did that for years and years and years. I have seen a lot of movies. In films, if you read scripts, scripts are almost entirely structure and outline. They're a plan, a guideline for the story that is to be made into a film. [25]

Etsy Merch

You don't happen to sell bookmarks on your Etsy, would you? I'm in need of a few bookmarks and would love some Alagaësia or Fractalverse themed ones. Ha! We’re actually going to have some up in the nearish future. [T]

TTRPG

If you were to create a game of Eragon or any of your other books, which book would it be and what would be the winning state of that game? Well, the funny thing is I've been developing a tabletop RPG for the World of Eragon. And I'm currently waiting to hear back from a publisher if they want to move forward with it or if we need to find another home for it. The slight difficulty I've had, the reason it hasn't come out sooner, is that Disney and Fox already owns the merch rights for the World of Eragon. So we can do a rule book and we can do other stuff, but we can't do figurines or some other stuff. So it's a little tricky. But Eragon was the natural answer for me to develop that world and to not do a D&D based system, but to come up with a completely new game engine based around my ancient language and the rules of my magic and being a dragon rider and all of that. As far as what are the winning conditions, that depends on the individual campaign. How the players want to play. What kind of things would motivate a player in an Eragon campaign? Probably to be a dragon rider and to be cool. But I'm structuring the campaigns around, the guidance that I'm hoping to provide is to, just like with the books, send the players in the direction of achieving peace in the land, of having a positive influence. With the full knowledge that the players are probably going to disregard that and rampage across the land, but you know, you do your best. [23]

Writing a video game

We have a lot of writers who are engaging in the video game industry. For example, Elden Ring. Would you consider writing for a game in the future? I would love to do that someday. It would really depend on the project though and my time. [32]

Mechanical Keyboard Video

You might find a Bluetooth keyboard helpful for ipads and tablets. You can get folding ones too for travel. Already have one. I'm going to do a video on how to hack together an awesome mechanical keyboard for cheap. [T]

Illustrated Books

Along with the release of Murtagh we have the illustrated edition which came out at the same time. There is a new map here, from a fan. He did a version of this and posted it online, and I liked it so much I contacted him and said "well let's make a few tweaks, and if you are okay licensing it, let's do it", and so that's where this came from. So thank you Spencer. Oh that's cool. And do you have a favourite illustration? There's a couple of ones I really love. Hard to pick a favorite. I love the cover one. I love The Ra'zac in the cathedral at Dras Leona. There's one where it's multiple images that are sort of shattered of Brom and Saphira. There's Saphira in a snowy tree chasing a bird with Eragon near the beginning. It's really a lovely lovely book. [15]
It looks great. There is a kind of optimism in his art. A brilliance and joy that I like. [21]
I want a background for my PC created from the Battle under Farthen Dûr illustrated edition art. Would anybody know how to get a hi-res version of it? Even if I have to pay. I love the artwork for the scene so much. You could ping the artist on Instagram and see if he has an image you could use. He's usually pretty responsive. [R]
The first book that you released after your dry spell was not To Sleep in a Sea of Stars, it was an official Eragon coloring book. Yeah. Do you know how long it took to write that as well? I mean my God that was like 3 years of solid work. I didn't have to do the art, but just figuring out the words for a coloring book, it hurts. Do you think that coloring books are the key to curing writer's block, and do you recommend other bestselling fantasy authors struggling to publish a new book for the last decade to try this approach as well? Absolutely. Although, the thing is, is like I said, it was hard to write. If you're having trouble writing in general, you might find that tackling a coloring book actually sets you back even further, especially since some authors, not going to name names, don't have any discipline and would probably start doing a 10 book series in coloring books. But it was a rewarding experience. I really learned a lot as an author. And I've been able to apply that knowledge from the coloring book to my future books. Yeah, it's such a shame that Tolkien published so few books. Imagine what he could have accomplished if he put out a coloring book. Exactly, exactly. Of course, the problem with coloring books is they tend to be all black and white so it's very hard to get any shades of gray in your characters. [28]

Audiobooks and Malte Wegmann's Music

In the acknowledgements section you also talk about the soundtrack for the audiobook of "Murtagh", which is available online. I've listened to it. It's good isn't, it? It's pretty cool! Do you have a favourite track? I think the main theme actually. Although I saw that apparently the most played track off of that is actually the Nal Gorgoth theme, the village. But I love the main theme because it has a sort of ache to it, a bittersweet ache, which feels very appropriate for Murtagh and Thorn. I've worked with the composer Malte Wegmann a couple of times, he did music for the audiobook for To sleep in a Sea of Stars and then Fractal Noise. Fractal Noise might actually work better as an audiobook versus in print, because the whole concept of the story is that there's a repetitive sound being emitted by this artifact on the planet and the audiobook can capture that in ways that a book can't. Malte has really evolved as a composer. He started as a fan, he was composing little pieces of fan music for the Inheritance Cycle and releasing it online as part of what he called "The Inheritance Project". I heard bits and pieces and I loved it and he was willing to collaborate and work. Of course, we paid him. I don't take fan work for free. And now we've done this for three books in a row. [15]
I loved Murtagh. In fact, I'm listening to Malte Wegmann's work for the audiobook music right now, and it's really amazing. It both confirms and expands my understanding of the book. I don't know how much of a hand you had and how the pieces turned out in the end, but if you did, can you share what the collaboration process was like? Malte is a fan, and he started releasing Inheritance-inspired music even before To Sleep in a Sea of Stars came out. I saw it, I enjoyed it, and I saw him developing as a composer as he was going along. With To Sleep in a Sea of Stars, we really worked on making that a beautiful package, both in the print version and the audiobook. So I reached out to Malte and asked if he'd be interested in doing some music for the audiobook, which he did. And he's now done music for every book since then. So To Sleep, Fractal Noise, and now, Murtagh. The Fractal Noise audiobook is fantastic. There's sound effects through the whole thing. There's music. It's really quite the production. With Murtagh, Random House does not normally use music in their audiobooks, and they haven't really done it with the Inheritance Cycle. I think they might've used a little outro music in the past, but that's about it. So I told them, "I want to do this", and Malte came up with some initial sketches for pieces for each of the different sections in the book. And then I gave him my feedback. Some of them, he nailed them right off the bat. Others, he was in the general ballpark, and then I wanted to work with him to get it right where I wanted it for the world. I think one or two pieces we had to go around with quite a few times, like the main theme for Murtagh himself. I wanted something that felt both noble and yet aching at the same time, and also masculine, which felt important. Just kind of getting the right tone, the right feel, that was tricky, and Malte did it. He really did it. So I got to hand it to him. It's great feeling throughout. And assuming he's available and interested, I look forward to continuing to have his music in my audio books. [31]
Ah! Been hearing pieces of the music that Malte Wegmann is composing for the Murtagh audiobook. It's SO GOOD. I'm half tempted to listen to the audiobook myself! Have you ever listened to one of your audiobooks before? Only extracts. [T]
Close your eyes and listen to the main theme that Malte Wegmann composed for the Murtagh audiobook. And yes, he really captured the feel. (There's a lot more music throughout, btw.). [T]

The Original Movie

What was your favorite moment to see played out on the big screen? Well, none of my favorite moments made it onto the big screen, so... What I wanted to see was Saphira breaking the star sapphire in Tronjheim during the great battle. And that does not exist in the film that does not exist. That said, I'm an executive producer and co-writer on the show. So I've got my fingers in the pot pretty deeply. [30]
For all for all the jokes about the film, and I've said my share of them, it's not the worst film in the world. The problem is it's not a particularly good adaptation of Eragon, and that's where the disconnect happens. The budget on the film was actually ridiculously bigger than you would think watching the film. They spent a lot of money on the movie. It was huge. But behind the scenes it was a very difficult process with a lot of upheaval behind the scenes. It was the largest budget that that sub-studio of fox had ever worked with before. The biggest budget they'd worked with before that was Castaway, which I think was 80 million at the time, and most of that was Robert Zemeckis and Tom Hanks' salaries. It was something outside their wheelhouse. There was no one involved in the project who really loved the material. Perhaps it's unfair to have expected that. Because Eragon was so new, there wasn't the fan base that had grown up the way there is now. People didn't know where the story was going and the lore of Alagaësia did not exist to the degree it does now. But still, no one was ultimately in charge of the project who really liked the book on a deep level and I think that shows on the final product. Not enough to put you off trying again, which I think is very admirable. What's the alternative? You could just give up. You have to try. You have to try writing a book even if it doesn't work. You have to try making an adaptation even if it doesn't work. That's life. You fall flat on your face, you get up, you do it again. Was it always something that you wanted to see? Of course. I originally envisioned Eragon as a movie but there was no possible way to get that made as a kid, so I wrote it. [25]
What do you think of the film version of Eragon? It’s not a horrible film . . . but it's not a particularly good adaptation, and ultimately, that's the problem. Few of the things that people enjoy in my books are in the film. (As one example: you wouldn't even know that the books contained elves and dwarves, if you just watched the movie.) [20]
It was quite soon after Eragon became a success and I had little input. I think I had two phone calls from the director. I don't think it's a bad movie; it made good money. But the movie does not do justice to the book. [16]
We're going back. I just can't in good conscience dedicate a whole subreddit to the movie and leave the books to the wayside! Hope everyone had a fun April Fool's day! Well darn. Focusing on the movie was the best thing that could have happened! :D [R]
The Movie was so inspirational, Christopher released multiple books in its image. Hey, ripping off a masterpiece such as that movie was my best career path. Don't judge. [R]

The Eragon Disney Plus Show

News

Any news on the Eragon show? Yes, but I can't tell you. :D [T]

Loosing the showrunner

The TV show for Eragon is in development at Disney. Hopefully we'll be having some news on that fairly soon. Can't say anything about some of these things until you can, but it is still in the works. It's hard to sit on stuff. It is. We had a showrunner lined up for Eragon and then the strike happened and everyone parted ways because the strike. Everyone's going off and doing different things. So it goes. [30]
So we're waiting for Disney to greenlight it, are we? What we're waiting for is some key personnel to get into place, specifically we need the showrunner. We had a number of people interested and we were talking with people and there was one person in particular that I thought was going to be a good fit, and then the writer strike happened. Now we're having to restart the process. [25]

Showrunner search

The TV show is in early development. We got stalled out because of the writers' strike. Basically we're looking for the showrunner. If we can't find the showrunner of the show won't happen. And it's a very short list of people who would qualify. Because you need someone who can run a big budget television show. Of which there are not many people. Someone who likes the subject material and wants to adapt it in a way that seems faithful. And someone who gets along with me and that I get along with them. Oh, and who is available. Because a lot of people who might qualify are under contract with that studio or that show. So we're looking and once we get that person hopefully then the show will actually start moving forward. [15]
And the thing is, it's a very short list of people who can take that position. For those who don't know, showrunners oversee an entire show. They may or may not direct any episodes, but they usually oversee the production and the writing. They often write many of the episodes or at least help. The list of people who can do that is A, small. There's only so many people who have the experience to run a big budget television show. B, it needs to be someone who likes the material and actually wants to adapt it in a way that is faithful to it. And C, gets along with me and I get along with them since we have to work together. So yeah, that's what we need to find. [25]

Timeline

When and if we get showrunner in place, and of course, everything's shut down in Hollywood because of the holidays right now, so hopefully beginning of the year we will actually be able to nail something down. When and if we get a showrunner on the show, then that person and I will write probably the pilot and maybe the first two episodes, or at least the pilot and the first episode. And then Disney will look at that and that's what they'll make the decision on whether or not to commit to a first season. And if they commit to the first season, they pull the lever on that, then we go full speed ahead. And then the whole machine kicks in in terms of pre-production and design and costumes and casting and music and directors and all of that. So getting to that point is the first big pump if you will, the first week the first big hill to climb. [17]

Writing Scripts

I'm currently working on a giant map and as for what I'm writing next, not quite sure. I'll decide once I'm done with the map. But it'll either be something in the World of Eragon or the Fractalverse, and I may have a screenplay I need to write posthaste so we shall see, but exciting stuff. [22]
I'm currently writing and have been for a couple of weeks now. And I can't tell you what I'm working on because it's for- it's for someone I can't talk-, it's something I can't talk about. So hopefully I will be able to talk about it. I can't talk about it quite yet, but y'all would be excited with it if I could tell you. As far as upcoming plans, what I'm working on now is not actually a book, but I hope to have a book out next year. [29]
The big monkey wrench in that is that the television show for Eragon and the television show for To Sleep in a Sea of Stars are both still alive and kicking. And more than, in fact. So I have contractual - Now I think I know what you're up to. To quote a wonderful British show, you might say that, but I couldn't possibly comment. I have contractual obligations on both of those shows, so I have to basically drop everything and do writing on them if required, which is a wonderful opportunity, of course, and it's one I want, but it does come with a price on the book side of things. It does, but it also comes with a lot of reassurance for readers and fans like me. What they did do with their recent Percy Jackson series I thought was pretty great. Bert Salke, who produces Percy Jackson, is also the producer on the Eragon adaptation. And he and Percy just got picked up for a second season. So we're all very happy with how that's done. You're like, "I can't talk about it. I can't talk about it." Well, we wish that you could. [29]
Were I to go back and re-edit or tweak those first two books, there's definitely some things that could use a little ironing out. I've been looking at the first book in depth for a project I'm currently working on which I can't talk about. And I can definitely see that was my first book. But at the same time, it's my best-selling book. [30]

Cancel Risk

Is this show still safe given the state of Hollywood and all the cuts and cancellations of projects we're seeing at the moment? It's tough times in Hollywood at the moment, but Eragon is safer than, say, Spiderwick. Unlike Spiderwick, Disney owns 100% of Eragon, and -- so far -- Disney isn't selling or cancelling stuff that they outright own. [R]

Making Changes

Do you feel because of your last previous experience, you have more of a determination to see your favorite parts come to life in this adaptation? Well, two things. Yes. More determination to see it be faithful to what made the story popular in the first place, because I wrote it for certain things and people responded to those things, so those things need to be in the story. But part two is that also having more time away from the actual writing of the books, I've had years and years to think about the story, and as a result, I've thought of a number of ways to streamline, condense, actually adapt it. And those thoughts that I've had, it only comes with time, no subsitute for that. So having some distance from the writing has actually helped in terms of figuring out how to actually adapt it in a successful manner. [30]
With TV, especially nowadays, you've got so much room to explore and actually explore the universe that you've created. Yes. The difficult thing with adapting a book is that books can show you very easily what's going on inside someone's head. Film and television are all external and so, even if I were 100% in charge of an adaptation and I had all the money in the world and all the time in the world and I could make it exactly the way I wanted to make it, there is no way to make it exactly the way it is in the book because you just can't. Then on top of that, the way I envision and see the characters and the world is probably different from how a lot of readers envision and see it, and that's something also that people don't always think about when they say "oh I wish the creator was in charge of the project". It's like when I first met Terry Brooks, the author of The Sword of Shanara, except he says it shan-ara. Which is his right and I totally respect that he wants to say it The Sword of Shan-ara, but no it’s The Sword of Sha-nara. [25]
Given your history with adaptations of your work, what's your current opinion on, especially recently with the Wheel of Time adaptation, of great Hollywood studios' relationship with creators, how they treat fantasy authors when it comes to the creative process of adaptation? I have to say the Wheel of Time adaptation was not successful for me personally. But Robert Jordan is also not alive. He was not there to participate in that adaptation. And there's a lot of difficulties with adaptation that apply to any project, not just sci-fi fantasy. One of them is that when you write a story, you go through this entire chain of thought that allows you to build the plot and the world and the characters. You explore a lot of avenues that don't work. And as a result, you end up creating whatever it is you create, and you have a whole list of reasons for why you create what you did create. When someone comes in to adapt your work, they haven't gone through that whole chain of thought. They're starting from the outside working in instead of starting from the inside working out. And thus, it can be very easy for someone adapting a book to say, "Well, why don't we change XY? Why don't we just do this?" Because they don't understand why that wouldn't work, because they haven't put in sometimes literally years of thought into why XYZ wouldn't work in this world or with these characters. So adaptation is difficult at best. Fantasy, I think is the hardest genre along with comedy in order to do successfully because if it's fantasy set in a fictitious world, you need to create the feeling in your audience that this is a different world. So accents need to be different. The costumes need to be appropriate. It needs to feel real, while also perhaps magical and mythical if you're going for a Tolkien-esque feel. Game of Thrones was successful because it was fairly realistic, and they stuck with that for the most part. The Rings of Power is a completely different approach. They went for the mythic, epic feel in a way that Game of Thrones really didn't. So it's difficult and some adaptations are more successful than others. I'm currently watching the Percy Jackson show. The main producer for Percy Jackson, Bert Salke, is also the producer on the Eragon show. And Rick Riordan has been very, very deeply involved with that adaptation. And my understanding is that it's very close to the books and it's been very successful so far. And then, of course, there are film examples of Twilight and Hunger Games and Harry Potter, which stuck to the books fairly closely and thus had quite a bit of success with the audience. Hopefully, that's the model for Eragon. And part of why I am going to be co-writing, is to make sure that the person I'm working with understands who the characters are, what's important to them, what's important to the world. And even if some things have to change in order to best present the story in a different medium, which is television, that feeling and that core of meaning is maintained, but it is a major challenge. [32]

Brom

There is a Disney Plus series that is in the very, very early stages. If you had all the power in the world, would you give Brom a little bit more time in the Disney Plus series? Probably. I've been joking we should cast Sean Bean because then he can meet an early demise. Originally, I wanted Sean Connery or Patrick Stewart. But I think we need someone a little more robust at the moment. I do love how different their vibes are. They are. Actually, Karl Urban could do it easy. He's getting crusty. [9]

Casting

Do you have any dream casting for the main characters? I had a couple of people I would have liked to have seen in certain roles, but they've aged out of those roles at this point. And I'm a little bit behind on the current crop of actors because of young kids and work. I'll say this, and this might sound a little woo-woo, but the hardest part with an adaptation is capturing a vibe. Because a story or a character gives you a certain feeling, and everyone gets a different feeling from it perhaps. But replicating that feeling in a different medium is extraordinarily difficult. And so I think that's why, especially when it comes to casting, you go in with a preconceived notion, but someone else comes in and auditions and if they have the right vibe for the character, the right feel for the character, it's like, okay, they're six inches taller than I thought and a hundred pounds heavier, but it doesn't matter because they feel like the character. That said, you wanna be generally in the ballpark, but there's a reason why they cast Hugh Jackman as Wolverine even though he's like a foot taller than the character in the comic books. Hugh could do anything. I love him. Sing, dance, everything. I'm not sure I'd cast him as a hobbit, but he could probably do it. Very difficult. He'd make a better wizard. Or Ranger. Hugh Jackman as Aragorn, that'd be interesting. I actually was at Comic-Con one time when he was walking around dressed as Wolverine and everyone thought he was just a cosplayer at first. And my God, in person, the guy was ripped to the bone, tall, very, very imposing person in person. [30]
Regarding the Disney adaptation, if I am only asking you personally and if you have all the liberties in the world, what qualities will you be looking for in the person incarnating Eragon, beyond of course a resemblance and good acting? Is there anything more? I'm not sure I'm willing to commit to an answer for that at the moment, because it's such a particular thing, and there are probably a number of people who could do a good job in the role, and it's a hard role to cast because it needs to be someone who can capture youth, but at the same time be old enough to be convincing in terms of wielding a sword and having adventures. I remember when I was 15 and I thought I was so grown up and now I see 15 year olds and I look at them and go, "they're babies! they're babies!" But they're not. Because you are in many ways mostly a grown up at that point, you're just not entirely grown up. So I don't know, I think it's gonna be a long conversation to have with the producers about exactly who we're looking for and what we're looking for and then we have to see who's available. Since you mentioned that you would like to have a new face for this role, do you think it would be a good thing, if possible, to make an open casting, even in Europe, as to find the best Eragon possible? I have no idea how Disney would want to handle this, so this may be completely out of my control. I know that when Fox was looking for an actor to play Eragon, and I again, I wasn't part of the process back then, and I only found out about this after the fact, but they auditioned some insane number of young actors for the role. It was well over 1,000, it might have been more like 10,000. It was just some insane number of actors and I know they were kind of despairing. So I think an open casting would be a great idea just to attract talent from around the world. I actually think an actor from Europe might be a good pick because one of the problems with casting actors from the US unfortunately is you get the American accent, which for good or for ill, none of us really associate with an old world style fantasy story. But again, all of this is going to have be in collaboration with the producers, with whoever the show runner is, and I will have my say, but that's one say out of at least three and possibly more people. [17]
Hear me out… Danny DeVito as Galbatorix. Danny DeVito as Arya. . Odd note: DeVito and I share a birthday. [R]

Cameos

When the movie that doesn't exist was not being made, they invited me out to the filming in Budapest. But I was on book tour at the time, so I couldn't do that. But they offered me a cameo, and I asked and they agreed that I could appear in the final battle as an Urgal, as the shortest Urgal ever, and that I could have my head chopped off on screen by Eragon. So that never happened, but maybe that'll get to happen with the television show. [32]

Disney Princess

Would Arya make the best Disney Princess? Yes! [Y]

Rides

If Disney built a ride based off the Inheritance Cycle, what would want it to be called? Dragonflight. [R]

Special Effects

Disney Plus for Eragon. I cannot wait. The only advantage with it taking this long to get an Eragon adaptation made after all these years is that every year that goes by, it becomes more and more possible to actually do justice to the material in terms of the special effects. We could not even have been having the conversation about a proper television show of Eragon in 2011, for example. When Game of Thrones started coming out, doing a dragon on television with any sort of realism was just incredibly expensive. And it's still expensive, but we can do that plus more for the same amount of money. So yeah. So definitely the special effects are going to be slick. They have to be. There's two ways you go in Hollywood these days. You can either go micro budget, or you really just have to go so big that it's sort of a tent pole, and you can actually get it made. The mid-budget stuff has all been relegated to television. But there is no way to do Eragon low budget and do it any justice. So it's one of those things where the studio has to buy in and say, we like the scripts, the fan base is there we're willing to spend a god-awful amount of money to make this happen. And to be fair, that's what they did with Percy Jackson. I've heard numbers, I don't think I can share them, but it was an extremely expensive show to make, as you might imagine, and special effects look great. [29]

J. Michael Straczynski

One of my other favorite properties would be Babylon 5, which managed to blend space elves and mythology with science fiction. It was one of those things where I bounced off it once or twice, and it's because it's so arc-based, and it was one of the first big shows to do that, you really have to sort of invest in it and really sign up for the long haul. And then the development of the characters and the world is surprisingly consistent. And that shouldn't be a surprise because J. Michael Straczynski wrote the vast majority of episodes himself, which has never been done before or since for a major show like that because it'd be insane to write all the episodes yourself. But I love the world building and I love the characters. And I think that one of the things that holds it back from perhaps a wider audience these days is the effects. They weren't preserved by the studio, so they looked better than they actually do now when they first aired. [Brandon Sanderson:] I almost got to make a show with Joe Michael Straczynski. Same, actually. I'll tell you the story off stage. Yeah, we don't have time for it right now, but got close. But things in Hollywood, everything's close. It may not have actually been that close. Everything's close, but nothing ever gets made. By the way, there are space wizards in Babylon 5. They're techno mages. [19]

The To Sleep in a Sea of Stars Show

Where can one keep up with the upcoming TSiaSoS show? No real news at the moment. Development got stalled out during the writers' strike. However, the project is still alive and moving forward. Things just take time in Hollywood. Lol. Also, switching from a film to a TV show took a lot more legal wrangling than we originally expected. [R]
To Sleep has been picked up as well, right? That was picked up even before it was published. Things often move slowly in Hollywood. And what happened was I worked on an adaptation for a film version of To Sleep in a Sea of Stars. And it was like ten pounds stuffed in a one pound sack. The script was not horrible, but it was unwieldy. It just couldn't work as one story. So we decided to shift to a television adaptation, and that seems to suit the material quite well. But then we had to take a very large, complicated contract that had already been negotiated and renegotiate, not from scratch, but renegotiate to shift it into television format. And that's just complicated. There were a lot of moving pieces, and it just took a long time. My lawyer has to look at it, their lawyers have to look at it. They have to talk about this. It goes back, it goes forth. And then, of course, we had the writer's strike and other stuff. So I did write the pilot for that and the second episode. So those are actually in fairly good shape. I think the next step would be we're going to be starting to look for a director to package it with then hopefully that could actually start moving forward. So yeah, along with the books and the kids, I've been rather busy. I can imagine. Are we allowed to know what platform To Sleep is going to be on? We don't know yet at the moment. [29]
The Eragon TV show is under development at Disney Plus, and I'm hopeful we're going to have some news on that front before too long here. I think things are moving along there. And I'm actually revising episode two of the television show for To Sleep in a Sea of Stars, which is also in development. Hopefully there's gonna be some news on both of those before too long. I hadn't heard about To Sleep in a Sea of Stars development. Yeah, it's been slow for a couple of reasons, but now the slowness has shifted, and now it's moving along pretty fast. [31]
I'm currently working on revisions for the second episode for television adaptation of To Sleep in a Sea of Stars, which is my big sci-fi novel [32]
With all of the success and attention that Dune has had, has there been any interest in adapting To Sleep in a Sea of Stars? I'm currently editing/revising the script for episode #2 for the TV adaptation of To Sleep. [T]
Christopher what are you working on? I'm actually revising the second episode of the television show for To Sleep in a Sea of Stars. Still in early days but it is moving forward. [Y]

My condo has organized a regular games afternoon. Attendees have been mostly retired women. Most of them have only played old games like gin rummy and Pictionary. I have brought Codenames, Dixit, Saboteur and Telestrations to play with them. They seem to have fun with these, but they have trouble grasping the rules. They have the attention span of a 2 year old and the memory of a goldfish. When I'm teaching the game, I can't finish more than 2 sentences without being interrupted with unrelated comments, and when we play, I keep answering the same questions over and over again.
Do you have suggestions for a game that is fun to play but very easy to grasp, or for techniques to help me teach games? Should I keep trying different games or stick to one game each session until they get it, at the risk of boring them? Or should I just give up and try to find another group?

Previously, on Hell’s Kitchen…
After a disastrous service, Melody’s life in Hell’s Kitchen seemed over, but Chef Ramsay gave her one more chance on the blue team. The next day, the final 12 participated in the revamped Cook For Your Life 2.0, with Melody, Grace, Shane and Ramona being nominated by their teams as the weakest chefs. In the end, Ramona recaptured the magic of her signature dish and won the challenge, and the coveted Immunity Pass, an all-important safety net that could be the difference between a second chance and going home. Grace, however, had the worst dish, and that meant she would lose her jacket, with only one service to earn it back.
After the challenge, the chefs tried to sort out their issues in the dorms, but there was little time for rest, as it was soon time to get back in the kitchen and start prepping for dinner service. In service, the blue team delivered their best performance yet, led by a trio of former red team chefs. It was a different story on the red team, as Shane singlehandedly sank the kitchen on appetizers, and in spite of the team’s efforts to recover, the blue team took home a second consecutive service victory. In the post-mortem, Grace got her jacket back, but after Shane refused to take responsibility for his mistakes, Ramsay finally had enough and sent him home on the spot.
Even with Shane’s elimination, the red team still had to come up with two nominees, and they ended up choosing
Deidra: “Everett.”
And…
Deidra: ”Faye.”
After hearing from each of them though, Ramsay decided to give them one more chance, feeling that Shane’s embarrassing exit was sufficient. Now, it’s time for the final 11 to prove that they have what it takes to become the executive chef of Gordon Ramsay Steak in Vancouver, British Columbia…
https://reddit.com/link/1ckk2z2/video/xbxcp9wnnjyc1/player
And now, the continuation of Hell’s Kitchen…
With Shane’s stunning downfall still on everyone’s mind, the chefs returned to the dorms with a very stark contrast in the mood between the two teams. The blue team was elated to have just completed a nearly perfect service, as Melody said in her confessional that she felt like she had earned her place on the team, especially after being nominated in Cook For Your Life. Meanwhile, Thomas said in his confessional that he had proven he could lead his team, and was looking forward to getting more opportunities to stand out as the crowd continued to thin. Back in the dorms, Lauren and Melody continued to be excited over their performance, but Thomas was ready to move on, saying they couldn’t afford to rest on this for too long. Carole jokingly told him to lighten up a bit, saying in her confessional that he always ended up being the wet blanket around here. Later that night, Travis ended up talking with Carole, and he admitted that he was still feeling the effects from his injury, and the pain was difficult to hide in service. Carole was surprised he would say anything, as someone might use that against him, but he said he trusted her. Carole said in her confessional that it would suck to lose Travis now, as he had been one of their strongest chefs, and tried to encourage him to fight through it.
On the red team’s side of the dorm, despite their initial delight at Shane’s elimination, Michael was frustrated that they had lost again in spite of the fact that he had another good night, as he said in his confessional that individually standing out on a bad team wasn’t much to brag about. Faye admitted that she was definitely missing Thomas, Lauren and Melody right now, to which Everett agreed, as he said that it was like Ramsay took the core of the red team and gave it to the blue team. Ramona said it was starting to feel lonely around here with only five chefs left on the team, and said in her confessional that she felt a lot safer now thanks to her immunity pass, but knew she would have to step it up in service to keep the team from turning on her. Deidra said that with Shane gone, there were no excuses for any of them to hide behind their teammates or an immunity pass. Ramona took offense and said Deidra had no room to talk either. Faye broke them up quickly and took Ramona to the bedrooms, where they had a private talk, with Faye saying she understood being upset at being called out, but that it was important to stay focused and fight back with cooking rather than words. Ramona said in her confessional that she needed that pep talk and was grateful to Faye for seeing her side of things.
The chefs eventually turned in for the night and tried to get some sleep to prepare for whatever awaited tomorrow.
Challenge
The next day, the teams came downstairs, and were greeted by Ramsay standing next to a large wheel which Everett said in his confessional looked like it came straight out of a game show. Ramsay told the chefs that creativity and the ability to build a dish from the ground up were critical skills for any chef, and that was why he was bringing back a challenge from season 23, Wheel of Fortune. Before they began, Ramsay explained the rules.The teams would take a total of 6 spins each to determine their ingredients, however, there would be further surprises lurking within. First, instead of getting an ingredient, they might get a Steal, which was self explanatory. Secondly, they might get an ingredient with a swap symbol over it, which gave the spinning team the option to exchange that ingredient with one from the opposing team.
Melody said in her confessional that she was a huge fan of game shows, and couldn’t wait to get started. With that, Ramsay asked for a volunteer from the blue team, and Melody eagerly stepped forward first. After spinning the wheel, it landed on miso. Deidra spun for the red team and got chives. Grace got fennel for the blue team. Ramona got potatoes for the red team. Thomas got carrots for the blue team. Faye got duck for the red team, which was the first protein earned in the challenge. Lauren said in her confessional that the blue team could really use a protein right about now, and with her spin, she landed on the Steal space. Without hesitation, she took the red team’s duck, which annoyed Faye in her confessional. Michael went next and got daikon for the red team. Carole got tomatoes for the blue team. Everett was nervous in his confessional, as he said luck had never exactly been kind to him in these kinds of games, but he damn sure needed a protein right now. Fortunately, he was able to get Grouper for the red team. On the final spin, Travis got couscous for the blue team. Deidra spun again for the red team, and landed on cherries, but since the space had a swap symbol, Ramsay told the red team to discuss amongst themselves whether or not they wanted to keep it. After a few moments of discussion, Michael announced that the red team was going to swap the cherries for the blue team’s miso.
With the ingredients decided, Ramsay told both teams that they had 45 minutes to turn their haul into a stunning dish, starting from right now. The teams rushed into the kitchen and began brainstorming ideas. In the blue kitchen, the team had duck, fennel, carrots, tomatoes, couscous and cherries. Melody wanted to make duck leg confit, whilst Thomas suggested seared duck breast and Grace wanted to make a roasted duck. The blue team also had trouble agreeing on how to use their sides, as Thomas and Grace each wanted to make a different type of sauce, while Lauren and Melody said they should have a vegetable medley in the couscous. Lauren said in her confessional that there were simply too many egos here, and everybody wanted to lead. Travis said in his confessional that he didn’t want any part of the bickering and was determined to serve Chef Ramsay a perfect plate, regardless of what was on it. Thomas kept pushing his ideas for the dish, asking the team to trust him on this, and finally, they seemed to come around to it, with Lauren saying in her confessional that she hoped Thomas knew what he was doing. With Thomas directing in the blue kitchen, the chefs got to work, though Grace was still resentful, and grumbled in her confessional that she felt like she was on the Thomas team rather than the blue team. Meanwhile, Melody was impressed by Thomas’ leadership in her confessional, and said the blue team was running like clockwork right now.
In the red kitchen, the chefs had grouper, miso, chives, potato and daikon. Despite having only five ingredients, Faye was still confident that they could win this challenge, as she and Michael had come up with a plan for their dish after swapping the cherries for miso. Michael explained that they should try an Asian-flavored dish, which the others got on board with quickly. Ramona said in her confessional that it was a great idea, and she was determined to play a role in helping her team win, especially with her nomination in Cook For Your Life still fresh on everyone’s minds. Faye tried to get the team organized, and assigned Deidra to cook the grouper after being assured by the latter that she had this. Deidra said confidently in her confessional that the red team had nothing to worry about, because the queen of the fish station was here. The red team continued to be in good spirits as Everett and Ramona exchanged enthusiastic words, though Michael told them both to hold off on the celebrations and stay focused.
With the 45 minutes nearing the end. Ramsay called out for the teams to start plating, and after counting down the final seconds, told both teams to stop and bring their plates to the pass to be judged. The blue team presented their fish first, which was introduced by Thomas as a pan-seared duck breast with a cherry sauce, along with fennel, grilled carrots and tomatoes over couscous. Ramsay noted that the presentation was stunning, and asked where the idea for the dish came from. Thomas claimed credit for the protein, saying Lauren and Melody helped out as well. Grace was annoyed in her confessional, as she had suggested the cherry sauce. Ramsay asked Travis and Carole what they contributed, to which Travis admitted it was hard to get a word in, and Carole agreed with him. That annoyed Thomas, as he said in his confessional that anyone here was free to speak up if they wanted to. Nonetheless, Ramsay began tasting the dish. After saying that the duck was beautifully cooked, he noted that the sauce seemed a bit watery, but still tasted nice. He also noted that the couscous seemed slightly undercooked, but the vegetables were delicious, and he said it was a well-made dish overall. Moving on to the red team, Ramsay asked Faye what they made, and she introduced their dish as miso-glazed grouper seasoned with chives, with a garnish of roasted potatoes and daikon. Presentation wise, Ramsay praised the vibrant colors of the dish and said he couldn’t wait to taste it, but first, wanted to know who did what. Deidra claimed the fish, saying in her confessional that it was time for her to step up and prove that she could lead her team to victory in a challenge. Upon tasting, Ramsay said the grouper…was cooked beautifully, which led to a celebration by Deidra in her confessional, as she said that of course, she knocked it out of the park. Overall, Ramsay said the flavors were spot on, despite having one less ingredient, and that this was going to be an extremely difficult decision. In the end though, he announced that one dish had a slight edge…
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The red team, as their dish felt more complete and put their protein front and center, whilst the blue team’s dish had seemed divided between the garnish and the protein. The red team celebrated their win, with Michael being absolutely fired up in his confessional, and he said that the red team had badly needed this win. Meanwhile, Deidra said in her confessional that she was just getting warmed up, and couldn’t wait to kick the blue team’s ass again in service. Grace blamed Thomas for the blue team’s loss in her confessional, and said the blue team needed to get its shit together, and quickly. Thomas said in his confessional that the blue team’s dish should have won hands down, and would have if not for Grace’s meddling.
Reward / Punishment
Ramsay had the teams line up and told the red team that they were in for a fun day of horseback riding in the scenic Santa Monica mountains, which would include a special picnic lunch prepared by Ramsay himself. The red team whooped and cheered, and Ramsay teased Everett by saying he looked way too excited about this. Everett said he was a cowboy at heart, and in his confessional, said the entire experience of Hell’s Kitchen was worth it for this. Turning to the blue team, Ramsay asked what went wrong, since they had an advantage by having an extra ingredient. Travis said their teamwork left a lot to be desired, which Ramsay said was a damn understatement. Then, he said they were in for a long day, as not only did both kitchens and the dining room need cleaning, but as he had decided to put the red team’s winning dish on the menu for tomorrow night’s service, the blue team would need to bring in and unpack the entire shipment of grouper. Ramsay then reminded Melody that she still had her punishment pass, and could use it now if she wanted to, but Melody said she couldn’t bring herself to replace anyone on her old team, and decided to keep the punishment.
With that settled, Ramsay told the red team to hurry up and get changed into the outfits, as the limo awaited them. When they got upstairs, they found cowboy and cowgirl outfits waiting for them, which Everett and Faye were the most excited about, and after Ramona and Michael said they had never been horseback riding before, Faye said they were about to learn how it was really done. The red team came back downstairs and exchanged banter with the blue team, who were already starting to clean the kitchens as part of their punishment, and Deidra promised to bring them back a souvenir. As they walked out the door, Lauren told Melody that she should’ve used her pass to replace Deidra, though Melody joked that she wasn’t sure if the blue team could handle that level of sass. Meanwhile, the red team’s spirits were as high as they had been in some time, with Michael saying he felt good, and looked good, while Ramona admitted she was nervous to go horseback riding for the first time, but Everett tried to reassure her. Soon, they had reached their destination, and, led by a guide, began their scenic trek through the mountains on horseback. The red team were in high spirits as they took in the beauty of nature, with Faye saying in her confessional that the red team really needed this win to give them a confidence boost going into tomorrow night’s service. After some time, the chefs were led to a location with a stunning view of the landscape, where their picnic supplies, and Chef Ramsay, were waiting for them. Ramsay asked them how their ride had been, to which Ramona said she couldn’t decide whether she was thrilled or terrified. The others laughed and everyone joined Ramsay for lunch, as they exchanged small talk and continued to bond as a team.
Back in Hell’s Kitchen, the blue team were trying to come to terms with their defeat in the challenge, as Thomas was still pissed off that they let it slip away, and was also upset with Travis and Carole for what they had said to Ramsay earlier, but Carole said it was true, and it felt like they hardly had a voice at all. Grace became annoyed as well though, and said if anyone was being shut down constantly, it was her. Travis said they were cooking like individuals right now, and that was why he had made his comment earlier. Lauren agreed and said that the blue team had the best chefs, but needed to check their egos at the door and work as a team. Carole was still feeling down and out, and Melody tried to comfort her, as she said she had felt similarly excluded on the red team and knew what she was going through. Travis also came over and said the blue team needed her. Carole said in her confessional that she couldn’t give up on herself now and was determined to make her voice heard. While the blue team tried to sort out their issues, they still had to finish cleaning up the kitchens and dining room, and, as they heard the dreaded sound of the delivery truck pulling in, Lauren said in her confessional that it was just getting worse and worse. The chefs all ran out and began to bring in the grouper, which wore them all out. However, as they finished, Melody noticed that they seemed to be overstocked, and Sous Chef Jon told them to check the invoice, upon which they realized that Grace hadn’t been keeping track of what they were bringing in, despite taking that role for herself. Lauren was pissed off and said in her confessional that Grace had one damn job and fucked it up. Due to her carelessness, the blue team was forced to return several boxes of grouper to the truck.
The red team returned to Hell’s Kitchen later that night, and joined the blue team in the dorms, where they annoyed them by talking about their day out in the mountains, with Grace saying in her confessional that she didn’t really need to hear about how much fun the red team had when she was still trying to get the stench of fish out of her system. Faye, though, said she wished Lauren and Melody could have been with them, and Lauren admitted in her confessional that it was impossible to stay mad at Faye. Michael said it felt great to go on a reward without Shane, and he was looking forward to service tomorrow, which the others on the red team agreed with. The teams returned to their respective sides of the dorms and continued to talk amongst themselves for a while before finally turning in for the night.
Pre-Service
The next day, the chefs were allowed to hang out in the dorms a bit later than usual, but were eventually brought downstairs to begin prepping the kitchens for tonight’s service. In the blue kitchen, Melody tried to lift her teammates’ spirits by saying they had this, and Lauren said in her confessional that it was much-needed encouragement after the debacle of yesterday’s challenge, and she was proud of Melody for stepping up as a leader. Thomas agreed and said that there were no excuses not to win this service going away, while Travis said in his confessional that he was determined to fight through the pain tonight and deliver his best performance yet.
While the blue team were fired up and ready to get back on track, the red team were hoping to build off their win in the latest challenge and notch up another win tonight. Michael said in his confessional that Faye was the only one he could fully trust here, and it would be up to the two of them to lead the red team to the promised land. Meanwhile, Everett was amped up and ready to go, saying he hoped Ramsay would put him on an important station, as he needed to bounce back after a few up and down services. Ramona felt similarly and said in her confessional that any slip ups would cause her team to nominate her, even if it was just to make her lose her immunity.
The teams wrapped up their prep, and Ramsay gathered them one more time to say that he was looking for leaders to start emerging from both teams, and with that, he sent them back to their sections and told Marino to open Hell’s Kitchen.
Service
The doors opened in Hell’s Kitchen once again, and the usual illustrious crowd of Hollywood elites and celebrities soon filled the seats and began to send in their orders.
For the blue team, Grace and Carole were on appetizers, Travis was on fish, Melody was on garnish, and Thomas and Lauren were on meat. Grace got off to a rough start though, as she asked Carole how long she needed for 3 capellini, only to be reminded that there were 2 capellini on the first table, and Ramsay told her to wake up. The two of them did manage to get the first few tables out alongside perfect scallops from Travis with no further incident, but Grace served mushy, overcooked risottos twice, which pissed Ramsay off, as he schooled her for making such a basic mistake at this stage. Carole, meanwhile, got lost on orders, and Grace did little to help by calling out inconsistent times, which caused the entire station to drag, and Carole said in her confessional that Grace needed to stop screwing the station over, while Grace said in her confessional that Carole was lost and doing nothing but making her life more difficult. Eventually, they were finally able to get some food out, with Carole doing her best to support Grace and impressing Ramsay with her leadership. Thanks to Carole and Travis continuing to have a strong night on fish, appetizers finally began to make their way out into the dining room, and eventually, they were ready to get started on entrees.
In the red kitchen, Michael was on appetizers, Deidra was on fish, Everett was on garnish, and the duo of Faye and Ramona were on meat. Michael said in his confessional that it was a big deal to be given the responsibility of running apps alone, and he was determined not to let his team down. For the first table, Michael was able to serve perfect risotto and capellini, but Deidra on fish served up raw scallops twice, and Ramsay schooled her for having a messy station with pans everywhere, asking her if she was cooking for a fast food joint. Deidra then unbelievably served rubbery scallops, and Ramsay said if she sent one more like that, she was gone. Diedra did manage to get it together and make acceptable scallops on her fourth attempt, but food continued to leave the kitchen slowly as she got lost on times and struggled to communicate effectively with Michael. With the station moving sluggishly, Michael became more frustrated, especially as he realized that his risottos were overcooked while waiting for Deidra, and he admitted to Ramsay that he was pissed off, to which Ramsay said that now Michael knew how he felt every night, and told apps and fish to get it together right now. Michael said in his confessional that as pissed as he was, he needed Deidra to work with him, and with his leadership, the red team did manage to wrap up appetizers and move on to entrees, though still behind the blue team.
While the red team tried to keep up, the focus in the blue kitchen now shifted to Thomas and Lauren on meat and Melody on garnish, who were hoping to give Travis more support on fish than he had gotten from apps. Thomas said in his confessional that it was nice to be paired with a competent chef who knew what the hell she was doing, and together, he and Lauren managed to serve up perfect Wellington and chicken for the first table. Meanwhile, Travis was busy dealing with orders for halibut and the grouper special, but he was able to get all of his orders accepted, and with Melody being active and vocal on garnish, the first table of entrees went out smoothly. Lauren had a brief stumble as she served rare Wellingtons instead of mid-rare and dragged on the refire. Thanks to good time management from Melody, though, they were able to get back on track. Travis had some struggles keeping up with the large amount of orders for the special, and served undercooked grouper for a table due to rushing the order, but Ramsay told him to take his time, and Travis said in his confessional that he was afraid of seeming lethargic given his injury, and may have been overcompensating. However, after he calmed down, he was able to bounce back with beautifully cooked grouper. Despite these issues, the blue team pushed through and delivered another strong service, finishing entrees on a high, and Ramsay said it was a job well done as he told them to clear down.
Back in the red kitchen, Faye and Ramona hoped to lead the red team to a strong finish after an uneven start. Faye managed to get her Wellingtons accepted, however, Ramona served raw chicken for the first table, and Deidra only made matters worse by serving raw grouper, which pissed Ramsay off, as he told her it was her own dish, on her supposed strongest station. Deidra said in her confessional that she needed to get her shit together, and quickly. Entrees continued to drag, however, as Everett and Deidra called out contradictory times and confused the entire kitchen. Ramona was able to bounce back with her second attempt at the chicken, however, and with Faye keeping up her solid performance, food did finally start to trickle out into the dining room. Ramsay continued to be frustrated, though, as he schooled Everett for sending up burnt potatoes, telling him there was a difference between roasted and fucking scorched. Faye also sent up overcooked Wellingtons, but was able to quickly bounce back on her next attempt, however the sauce from Everett was cold and bland, and he said in his confessional that he didn’t know what the hell it was about him and the garnish station that always seemed to end badly. Deidra continued to have a rough night despite being on her self-proclaimed strongest station, as she sent up overcooked and undercooked grouper, and got lost on how much salmon was needed for another table. Ramsay had enough and told Michael to get over there and show her how to make a fish, With Michael now helping out on fish, Faye and Ramona managing to get it together on meat, and Everett finally calming down on garnish, the red team managed to complete service several minutes behind the blue team.
Post-Mortem
Ramsay had the teams line up and said that before he went any further, it was clear that the blue team had won service, as he said they looked much more like a team tonight than they had during the challenge. Travis was pumped up to have won, saying in his confessional that the blue team needed this. With that out of the way, Ramsay turned his attention to the red team, saying that he had never seen a team fall so far after the blazing start they had to the season, and he wondered aloud if these chefs had just been hiding behind the chefs he put on the blue team. However, he did have high praise for one individual: Michael, as he had not only run his own station, but also saved the fish station, and that was why he was the Best of the Worst tonight. Ramsay then instructed Michael to think long and hard about the two chefs he thought would improve his team by going home tonight, and with that, he dismissed both teams back to the dorms.
In the dorms, the nervous energy in the red team was palpable, as each of the four remaining chefs knew they had a 50/50 chance of going on the chopping block and potentially going home. Michael said in his confessional that as much of an honor as it was, he hated to be directly responsible for sending anyone home, but knew there were still weak links here who were holding them back. He decided to talk to everyone individually, starting with Faye, as he assured her that she definitely wasn’t going up, and he needed her to help him get this team back to its winning ways. Next, he talked with Ramona, saying he respected her tenacity, but the raw chicken was simply not acceptable at this stage, but she defended herself by saying she had a solid service from that point. Michael told her she couldn’t take anything for granted, and he was worried that the longer she kept the immunity pass, the more it would go to her head. Ramona assured him it wouldn’t, and said in her confessional that she would be pissed to lose her immunity over one mistake in service. Next was Deidra, and Michael told her right away that she was at the top of his list simply for her poor performance on fish, considering it was supposed to be her strength, and her lack of a voice throughout the season. Deidra tried to defend herself by saying she had a lot more to offer the team than the other three. Finally, he talked with Everett, saying he was a great guy and someone he wanted to join him in the black jacket phase, but his issues on garnish were starting to become a problem, and it seemed like he couldn’t overcome even basic mistakes. Everett admitted he made his mistakes, but said Deidra was definitely the worst tonight, and should be the one going home.
On the blue team’s side of the dorm, Melody and Lauren celebrated their win and spent most of the night talking amongst themselves, which annoyed Grace, as she said in her confessional that it seemed like they were a team of two more than part of the blue team, and she was sure they would team up to vote her out if they had a chance. Carole asked Travis how he was feeling and he said that winning made everything better, though he admitted it still hurt like hell each time he took a step. Thomas said in his confessional that he was happy with the blue team’s performance, but they could always do better, and he went over to join Travis and Carole, sharing a rare smile with them.
Elimination Ceremony
The red team entered the dining room on the back of a fourth straight loss in service, with Ramsay asking what the hell had happened to the team he had seen at the start of the season, because right now, they seemed to be sleepwalking. He called on Michael, asking him for his first nominee and why. Michael announced that he had chosen Deidra, due to inconsistent performances and failing on her strongest station. Ramsay asked for the second nominee and why. Ramona and Everett both squirmed nervously, but finally, Michael announced that he was nominating…
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Everett, because he had a hard time communicating on garnish, and made several basic mistakes in his cooking. Ramsay accepted both nominees and told Deidra and Everett to step forward, first asking Deidra why should stay in Hell’s Kitchen.
deliberation music
Deidra: “I should stay here ‘cause I’ve never given up on anything I’ve done here, chef. I work hard on every station, I give 110% every service.”
Ramsay said that at her rate, she needed to be giving closer to 200%, because what she was giving him now wasn’t close to good enough.
Deidra: “Then I’ll give you that, chef. I’ll do whatever you need me to do.”
Ramsay said she could start by learning to cook her own dish from the challenge, then moved on to Everett, asking him why he should stay in Hell’s Kitchen after he brought the kitchen to a standstill on garnish.
Everett: “Communication was a challenge tonight, chef, Deidra and I never really got on the same page-”
Ramsay stopped him and said he wasn’t looking for any sugarcoating. He wanted to know, right now, if Everett believed he was a better chef than Deidra, and why.
Everett: “Deidra is a good friend of mine, chef, but yes, I believe I’m stronger than her.”
Deidra was shocked at this, and started to cut in before Ramsay shut her down.
Everett: “I think I have the leadership, I have the cooking skill. Once I calm down and get out of my own head, I can damn sure do this, I know that.”
Ramsay then asked Deidra if she thought she was a stronger chef than Everett, and why.
Deidra: “I know I’m stronger. I have more experience, I know how to run a kitchen, and basically chef, I think Everett’s communication caused our problems tonight.”
Ramsay sighed, saying he faced a tough choice now, but there was one chef he felt could not get any more chances.
Ramsay: “The person leaving Hell’s Kitchen is…”
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Ramsay: “Deidra. Your time here, unfortunately, is over. Please, take off your jacket, and leave Hell’s Kitchen.”
Elimination music
Ramsay: “I love the dedication and the work ethic, but if you can’t run one station, and your preferred station at that, I just can’t see you running a brigade. Thank you for trying out.”
Deidra thanled Ramsay and they shook hands as Deidra walked out the door.
Deidra’s comment
“It’s a bitter pill to swallow, leavin’ Hell’s Kitchen when I know I had so much more to show of myself as a leader. I know I can cook a damn fish, but tonight, for whatever reason, I just fucked it up. I’m gonna bounce back from this, it’s not gonna keep me down. So Chef Ramsay, thanks for the opportunity, but I hope that one day, I can prove you wrong.”
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After Deidra’s elimination, Ramsay said that given what he had witnessed tonight, and over the past several nights…
Ramsay: “I am not done.”
Dramatic music
Ramsay: “Thomas, Lauren, Melody…ever since I sent you three to the blue team, they’ve gone up, and the red team has nosedived. I want you three to talk amongst yourselves, and decide by tomorrow morning which one of you is going back to the red team.”
With his latest curveball still ringing in the air, Ramsay told the teams to go back to the dorms, as they had a lot of things to discuss. As they exited the dining room, several chefs had confessionals. Lauren said that just as the blue team seemed to have figured it out, Ramsay had thrown a wrench in the system again, and the question was, would she choose her friendship with Melody, or a chance to stand out as a leader on the red team? Thomas said that this was the opportunity he’d been waiting for, and while he had to share leadership with Lauren on the blue team, he knew this could be his chance to show Ramsay that he was the most qualified chef here to run Gordon Ramsay Steak. Melody said she didn’t want to be separated from Lauren again, but had to admit that it might be a chance to redeem herself after the way she left the red team. Michael said that this was great news, as he felt like he and Faye were doing all the heavy lifting around here, and they desperately needed one of their old teammates to help them regain their edge and start winning some damn services. Ramona said that she hoped Melody would come back, as they really needed some cheering up right now. Finally, Everett said he dodged a huge bullet just now, and it was time to unleash the beast, as there was nowhere to hide in the final 10.
Placement
https://preview.redd.it/86b13ie4ojyc1.png?width=2520&format=png&auto=webp&s=39f2a6486bedc5c7b54644bfece91652a1a6e46d

For 2-4 players, 1 deck of cards (exclude jokers, so 52) Start with every player being dealt 3 cards. On this hand, 3's are wild. The rest of the deck is put on the table, first card flipped. Player next to the dealer has the option to pick up the flipped card, or draw blindly from the deck. You must draw and discard to keep 3 cards in your hand. The goal is to either get 3 (or more on successive hands) of a kind, or a suited straight. Once again, 3's are wild so they can be used anywhere. If you forget, and discard a wild card, the first person to realize and smack the card gets to pick it up. If you successfully get a straight or 3 of a kind, you are out. Every other player must count up the cards in their hand, and that score goes against them. If the players who didn't 'go out' have cards that go together (ex: were on 7's, I have three 2's and three 5's, but one 8 that can't go with anything) then only the cards that don't match count against you.
2's-10's are worth their face value. Face cards (J, Q, K) are worth 10. Aces are worth 15. A wild card that can't be used is worth 20.
The hand on 3's is quick and easy, but then you move to 4's, and now 4 is wild. You play 12 hands, from 3's to Aces. (In a straight, aces can be played high or low, but cannot bridge the gap) The hand for 4's and 5's can be hardest, but once you get to 6's, you can split to 3 and 3 (ie, I have 3 of a kind and also a suited straight of J, Q, K.) On 7's you can go with 4 and 3, on 8's 4 and 4, or 5 and 3, etc. 9's can be 3, 3, and 3.
If you play with 2 or 3 players, once you get to the hand where J's are wild, you still only deal 10 cards. This continues for Q's, K's and A's.
If you play with 4 players, you only deal 9 cards for hands 10-A.
The person with the least number of points against them at the end if the last hand wins.
Anyway, I know this is KIND OF similar to some forms of Rummy, but I've never heard anyone play a game like this. My mom brought it home from work years and years ago, and my family plays it anytime were camping, on vacation, just sitting around the kitchen table, etc. I would love to know if anyone has played anything similar, and what you call it. Or if there's an official version/name! I know it's possible that we're just playing certain house rules.
Hopefully my explanation of the rules made sense 🤣 If you have any questions, feel free to ask. It's a super fun game, and there's definitely strategy! If no one has any answers for me, hopefully I at least shared a fun new card game with someone!

Hey guys,
I'm back with some of the best longform profiles I've found this week. You can also subscribe here if you want to get the weekly newsletter in your inbox. Any feedback or suggestions, please let me know!
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💸 Jeff Zucker’s Probably Doomed Quest to Buy the Telegraph
Michael Wolff // New York Magazine

A veteran cultivator of the press with, conversely, a notably thin skin, Zucker was immediately pummeled and vilified — not least by the publications he now effectively owned, waiting only to take formal control. Overnight, he seemed on his way to becoming a kind of business and social cautionary tale, a fatuous overreacher out of a Trollope novel.

🔫 The Insanity Plea That Shook a Small Town (🔒 paywall link)
Molly Langmuir // Rolling Stone

This was the moment the masked man had been waiting for. He stepped out from the trees and shot Rodney multiple times from behind with the rifle. Rodney ran toward the house but only made it to the door before the man caught up to him and shot him in the head with the handgun.

⚾ Ronald Acuña Jr. Thinks He's Got a 50-50 Season in Him
Adam Caparell // GQ

The Braves right fielder has all the tools to back up his beliefs: a need-for-speed attitude on the base paths, to start, plus a swing that’s as sweet as it is vicious. (Acuña succinctly describes his swing as “Fantastic!”). He’s young, commanding the strike zone like few others, thriving under the recent rules changes, and displaying the kind of power normally reserved for bulky sluggers. If anyone can create a new club, it’s Acuña.

🏛️ Will RFK Jr. and Other Third-Party Candidates Help Doom Democracy?
David Corn // Mother Jones

This year, Moscow will undoubtedly try to intervene in the American election. Third-party and independent candidates—who, of course, have the right to run and be considered on their merits—offer the Russians and other bad-faith actors avenues for meddling. These schemers can exploit attempts to expand democracy in order to undercut it.

🎢 Sam Bankman-Fried’s Dream Came True (🔒 paywall link)
Will Gottsegen // The Atlantic

SBF and many of his more explicitly anti-government competitors are out of the picture, the NFT-driven hype bubble has summarily popped, and more and more crypto-backed investment products are making their way into the mainstream. Maybe now crypto is finally ready to grow up.

🔍 Who’s Behind All the ‘Pussy in Bio’ on X?
John Herrman // New York Magazine

In short, this is why PIB accounts exist: If just one unfortunate X user clicks through — and through, and through, and through — and ultimately signs up for a scam dating site, the site’s owner makes bank, and maybe a freelance PIB spammer gets a few bucks.

🏙️ A Dutch Architect's Vision of Cities That Float on Water
Kyle Chayka // The New Yorker

He envisions persuading cities around the world to install hundreds of thousands of floating affordable-housing units to help alleviate overcrowding and gentrification. “It’s a lifetime of trying to connect the dots toward that future,” he said.

🤖 The Tech Plutocrats Dreaming of a Right-Wing San Francisco
Gil Duran // The New Republic

“The techno-optimist movement is a backlash to a kind of exhausting constant naysaying, constant reaction of ‘this is bad and will only be bad,’” said Nellie Bowles, a San Francisco native whose 2022 essay, “How San Francisco Became a Failed City,” became an instant classic of the “S.F. doom” genre.

🌟 Jess Hong Enters Her Chaotic Era
Jessica M. Goldstein // Marie Claire

Hong wants this for herself, too: To hold on to her sense of humanity no matter what comes next. As nourishing as it is, her work as an actor “is not who I am as a human being,” she says. “I am also a daughter, I'm also a sister. I'm also the child of an immigrant.”

❤️ Long Covid isolation won’t break my marriage — in fact, it’s made it stronger
Lygia Navarro // The Sick Times

Constantly preoccupied about my ill and disabled body, I’ve often felt subconsciously guilty that my family has to live on this island with me – as if they keep masking and isolating only to protect me. My sense of culpability is infinitely compounded by my disabilities requiring H to do all of the cooking and housework to keep our family afloat, all while he works a stressful job with long hours.

💿 The film fans who refuse to surrender to streaming: ‘One day you’ll barter bread for our DVDs’
J Oliver Conroy // The Guardian

Some film fans never gave up physical media: they’ve spent years quietly buying thrift-store discs, discarded by the many US households that no longer have DVD or Blu-ray players, and waiting for their chance to rise again. Other fans, frustrated by streaming’s limitations, have recently rediscovered physical media and trickled to join its rear-guard army.

👮‍♂️ How It All Went Wrong for Eric Adams (🔒 paywall link)
Michael Powell // The Atlantic

November brought a more ominous turn for Adams. Federal agents waved aside his security team, handed him a subpoena, and seized his cellphones and iPad as part of an investigation into his campaign fundraising. And FBI agents late last month searched two homes of an influential aide to Adams who has also raised money for him.

🦆 The Eider Keepers
Devon Fredericksen // bioGraphic

Like all wild birds, eiders can survive without human assistance. But across much of their range—including Iceland, Greenland, Alaska, the Russian North, and Canada—humans and common eiders have forged a unique, mutualistic bond.

🎥 Oppenheimer Actor David Krumholtz Is Still Waiting for a Career Bump
Brian Davids // The Hollywood Reporter

I’m a journeyman actor who consistently has to find ways to prove himself. Is it a burden? Yeah, it’s a burden, sometimes. I wish it was easier. So I’m trying to stay out of expectation. The hardest part of being in the film that won everything and made $1 billion is that you go into this place of expectation.

📚 A Conversation with Louise Erdrich
Sterling HolyWhiteMountain // The Paris Review

To begin with, if you’re not working in your traditional language, you are working in the colonial language, an automatic influence. I can barely speak to a four-year-old in Ojibwe, let alone write in it. But I own the curse and glory of English, a language that has eaten up so many other cultures and become a conglomerate of gorgeous, seedy, supernal, rich, evocative words.

🎭 "There's No Place I'd Rather Be": Victoria Pedretti on Her Broadway Debut
Jake Nevins // Interview Magazine

I think the challenge really does grow you as an actor. I had some muscles that had weakened or frozen up or just weren’t functioning with as much strength and agility as they used to. And this process has definitely reawakened something in my body and in my brain and soul.

🇺🇸 The Trump machine: the inner circle preparing for a second term (🔒 paywall link)
James Politi // Financial Times

2024 Trump is vowing a much more profound break from what used to be his party’s orthodoxy. As well as a push for Ukraine to settle with Russia, the potential measures include tariffs more sweeping than last time and an even more overwhelming crackdown on immigration. Trump has also threatened to launch purges of the federal judiciary and bureaucracy, which, in the view of many critics, are a sign of a greater authoritarian bent to a second term.

🕵️‍♀️ A Chronicle reporter went undercover in high school. Everyone is still weighing the fallout (🔒 paywall link)
Peter Hartlaub // San Francisco Chronicle

The “narc” accusations — students accusing Jones of being a cop — are sometimes played for comedy in the series, but presented a very real problem for the reporter, especially after students from the Peer Resource Center started defending her. Not only was Jones being untruthful to classmates and teachers, but she was forming real friendships, and the moment she had to confess to the betrayal was a ticking clock.

💰 How Fergie Chambers Went From Cox Media Heir to Communist Revolutionary (🔒 paywall link)
Rich Cohen // Air Mail

In this, Fergie personifies a type as old as income disparity: the rich kid who betrayed his parents, turned on his class, and used his part of the bonanza—ill-gotten gains, according to his ideology—to fund the storming of the Bastille.

🏠 ‘Mum knew what was going on’: Brigitte Höss on living at Auschwitz, in the Zone of Interest family
Thomas Harding // The Guardian

Brigitte said she knew that the people who worked in the villa and garden were prisoners in the camp. “They were always very happy,” she said. “They called my mother, the Angel of Auschwitz.” Seeing my surprise, Brigitte said: “My mom was just a nice person. Period.”

***
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Burner account
I serendipitously landed a job working for a very successful and prominent public figure in the film/television space. The gig is awesome, pays well, and it’s aligned with my own personal and professional career goals. I can also tell that my boss respects and values what I do for the organization, and he is cool as hell. It’s a dream job.
When I first began working in this position, I knew that this public figure knew a casual friend of mine and that they went back for years. About 6 months into the gig, she confessed to me that they are began dating after much consideration and debate. She asked me to keep it private, and I will occasionally see her on set and in the office. I know my boss knows that she and I are friends, and there have been some instances where we all briefly hang and make conversation.
The problem is that there are also some days where there is another woman who - seemingly - does the same things my friend does for my boss (hanging out in his trailer, in the office at night for events/hangs, even traveling and staying with him on some trips). I don’t see any conclusive blatant evidence like physical affection but it’s (ironically) like it’s a film and they’ve just swapped out different actors for the role of girlfriend from scene to scene.
My boss doesn’t try to hide this other woman from me. And I still have never acknowledged to him that my friend told me they started dating. At this point I spend more time with my boss than I do my friend (especially with how long shoot days can be when in production).
I don’t know how (or if!) I should bring this up to my friend. We are not super close but I do value her as a person. I have no idea if they have specific terms of agreement to their relationship (again, this is a very famous Hollywood tv/film person and I know sometimes the rules can be a little…well say flexible).
But I feel a bit guilty at witnessing something that I would want to know about if I had a partner who was breaking my trust. I also really don’t want to compromise the job that I am happy to have.
Is there a way to bring this up? Should I bring it up? Or is this a “keep your head down and mind my business” type of scenario?

My fellow gamers, for too long has our community suffered the indignation of an intolerable culture that has denigrated, besmirched, exploited, and has outright demonized our culture of unique individuals with a genuine love of a hobby that they see as profitable and progressive. They have taken beloved IP’s (Intellectual Properties) and twisted them into their own personal ideological crusade of undermining and humiliating the core aspects of characters they deemed as “Toxic” or “White Supremacy”. Through the guise and protection of DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusivity) & ESG (Environmental, Social, and Governance) they have used our influence in the entertainment industry to push their narratives and agendas that have stigmatized our culture with numerous anti-consumer practices that they call “being progressive”. But the truth of the matter is they were never really looking to be a part of our community, they simply wanted to use our community as a tool of activism and propaganda in the entertainment industry as it was extremely profitable, and they wanted inclusion in that division. Ever since GamerGate & Female Frequency, we have had to endure the incursion of forced ideologies, xenophobic behaviors and inferior overpriced products that have never been in our best interest and have been flat out disgraceful towards foreign media.
Before Gaming had become a major source of entertainment, we were often categorized as anti-social or societies rejects where because we found more enjoyment in playing fictional characters and not spending as much time out and about, we never fully assimilated in society (which is a good thing if you ask me). From 1998 to 2007, at the height of innovation, creativity and production, Gaming had reached a golden age in which it had revolutionized society. Hollywood Execs who had ruined the movie industry turned their attention to video games as a source of income since video games had outperformed movies in terms of profit. No one was concerned about gaming, much less diversity or inclusivity until it became profitable. This makes people like SBI look extremely disingenuous as they were not interested in gamers as a community with its own culture. They simply wanted to use it as another weapon in identity politics.
Microtransactions; the hidden enemy to gamer progress and inducer to mental laziness of our community. Microtransactions have been around for a long time; however, it has never been more potent and apparent than in recent years. It has aided in the dismantling and segregation of players on the ideology of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) and has created another sub-culture of gamers who have no real drive to be better outside of how much money they put into the game. This has degraded our culture as well as we have become “fat” off transactional gaming but at the same time we have been “starved” of purposeful gaming where our achievements were our sustenance. I am not saying that microtransactions are bad, but when they are exploitative and predatorial like they have been and don’t give gamers room to grow, we become lethargic and unwilling to improve ourselves as gamers. Oversaturated microtransactional games are one of the many reasons why we have become complacent and unwilling to fight against the exploitative tactics used by big brand game companies such EA, Ubisoft, ActivisionBlizzard, NaughtyDog and so many other western business model companies. Western style games were not like this in the past, they had much more depth and actual effort put into them with the gamer in mind. This has not been the case for over a decade and our connection to western developers has been whittled down to just being transactional. That is one of the reasons why you see so many remasters and remakes in today’s gamer community. They have lost their willingness to improve as developers of games and simply accept corporate/share holder rules.
Game journalists also do not have any real integrity or purpose outside of being funded for their involvement in promoting IPG (Identity Political Games) in a positive light to the public whether it’s positively received or not. They are not interested in what we have to say, they all support the same agenda and that is why they are a dying breed. Within the next couple of years, they will be out of the job and more than likely they will not be able to stay in the industry giving how they have responded to past articles that have clearly been scripted on the premise of diversity and racism. Not only that, but most of them are also extremely hostile to the community as they stereotype and defame the individuals that are a part of the community they are supposed to serve. We have been mentally liberated from their lies and coercive tactics as we tend to laugh at their obvious attempt at virtue signaling while hiding their misdoings so that they can play the victim.
My gamer brothers & sisters, I would not suggest the following action that we must take now without good cause. I have weighed our options and the best option for us now is this…...CULTURAL SECESSION. Naturally this is a form of segregation where they would more than likely claim they are being segregated by the dominant culture of the gaming community but that is incorrect. For years now we have been the ones who are often marginalized and ostracized for the smaller portion of our community. And when we aren’t, we’re exploited for more funds so that these companies can stay in business only to subject us to low quality products that coincide with the “WOKE Agenda” that are often huge expenses to these big brands i.e. AAA/AAAA games that will eventually flop for its obvious forced diversity and bug infested product which will undoubtedly piss off the consumer to the point of wanting a refund. Losing copious amounts of capital and stock in the process, not to mention their reputation is permanently marred.
We must separate on every cultural level in terms of entertainment and ideology. We must reject everything from the west that promotes toxic western beliefs, practices, and exclusion from other cultures (i.e. Southeastern Countries such as Japan and Korea). Japan & Korea have been the targets of unjust discrimination from Western Developers, Western Journalists, Western Localizers (The Wokelizers) and Western Society Prejudice regarding their sense of aesthetics as Westerners hate the aesthetic sense of these countries. The reason why they resort to such base tactics isn’t just because it weaponizes the ideal female form but it’s also because they have deep-seated insecurities about their own looks so when they see attractive female characters, they use terms such as “unrealistic” or “hypersexualized” to establish the moral high ground. But the truth is, they want to feel superior to that which is ideal, so they insult and dehumanize this figure that portrays natural female beauty because they see it as an insult to their own social superiority in what they believe is a hierarchy of them being at the top of all other women. Because of this and so many contributing factors, their movies flop harder than the Fat Chocobo landing on a group of enemies and their games seismically fail just as much if not more. We must sever our connection to Western Developers, Publishers, and ALL Western-Centric Entertainment for they seek to mentally enslave us to their Xenophobic ideology.
Let’s define Western Culture and its traits. Western Culture/Society is composed of more than several different ideologies that work in unison with one another to facilitate dominance over multiple aspects of society. Business, Social, Political, Technological, and sometimes even Global Affairs are affected by these ideologies that portray a specific mindset of Western beliefs. What are those ideologies you ask?

• Perpetual Victimhood: By weaponizing the fact that they are marginalized and of a small portion of western society, they can push their agenda to absurd standards that ultimately ostracize the main demographic. And when companies don’t capitulate, they are labeled as anti-progressive/misogynist’s or cohorts of White Supremacy. They use this to cancel their targets and silence them through societal defamation to keep the public on their side. They also use this mindset to justify their own lack of self-agency as they tend to throw companies who do adhere to their demands but miserably fail to turn a profit under the bus so that they can maintain face in front of the public while denying their actual involvement. They will never accept “Sense of Agency” when it’s negative but will gladly accept it when a positive outcome shines on them as if they are entitled to it.

Official Wiki GamerGate Page)
​

• Societal Terrorism: This is another form of ideology weaponization that they use in order to make companies “toe-the-line” with their agenda. By weaponizing cancel culture, they exert dominance over these companies but in exchange they also reimburse those companies with DEI & ESG funds that raise their credit score as well as having social status with the marginalized demographic. However; cancel culture has not succeeded in years and developers and publishers probably only want the money and the DEI ESG rating. But they have to maintain the image of having social economic power so that they can continue to strong-arm other developers into compliance and promoting financial benefits of DEI & ESG. In other words, if you are not for sale, they discredit and stigmatize you in the industry.

Asmongold Clips.
https://youtu.be/Iq86DnmX2xY
​

• “Its not us, its you who’s wrong” Mentality: This mentality is especially annoying as they tend to use it to hide their incompetence. They often look down upon gamers who are not in the industry to hide their obvious lack of knowledge on game development thinking that their job title grants them special status that they believe gives them the right to be condescending. But the truth they never wanted revealed has already strangled their careers of all credibility. They were never GAMERS, they were INVADERS. Community Colonists that seek to indoctrinate next generational gamers into their hive-mind and brand previous generations of gamers as villains.

@GeeksandGamers
https://youtu.be/1HbrTkqQFuM
​

• Double-standard Enforcement: By labeling something as “unrealistic” or “hypersexualized”, they can claim this is morally wrong if it promotes traditional dynamics between men and women. Heterosexual relationships are condemned while at the same time Same-sex relationships are praised. Additionally, heterosexual relationships with main white male characters turn antagonistic and spotlight stealing. This is deliberate as to promote the “Girl Boss” ideology to indoctrinate women into the Feminazi state of mind. While at the same time, should a male character also adopt the “I don’t need male/female” ideology its seen as Toxic Masculinity which isn’t even a real thing. The idea of a strong male character is taboo while enforcing strong female characters is the ideal.

@MugenLord
https://youtu.be/to5Uciy_yeg
@EndymionTv
https://youtu.be/7TPTR8-qmbk
​

• Dehumanization/Demonization: This is something that most military branches use in order to remove conscious inhibitions such as mass slaughter is wrong or categorization. By enforcing ideologies to denounce humanity in certain targets, it deactivates your conscience by saying this is not human therefore its ethically okay to treat this target without compassion and deny the fact it has sentience. We gamers fall under this category for journalists, developers, companies and society at large. This is a tactic we are familiar with to an extent as it implies that we are not normal when we do not do what everybody else is doing. “Geeks are the worse” or “Nerds need to fall into a pit of lava” are verbal dehumanization forms that most people in society say and we as Gamers tend to be relegated to those categories. This is their way of imposing the social hierarchy on us by establishing superiority. We know this as Gamers as we see it very often in the games that we play and some times experience it in real life.

https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Gamergate#The_end_of_their_relevance
​

• Deflection/Projection: This is basic psychology 101. By redirecting the conversation away from their mistakes and back on to the opposing view to avert blame and justify their innocence they can avoid criticism. However; deflection is a CONSCIOUS decision, meaning they have no real argument to justify their incompetence. If you can consciously process the situation, you have self-agency which means you don’t have a legitimate excuse. Projection is something else entirely. Most times, Projection doesn’t work on conscious decisions rather it is automatically deployed when feeling threatened, anxious or both. Instead of accepting accountability for feelings or actions that are deemed socially unacceptable they accuse others of committing that unacceptable behavior thereby exonerating themselves and proving that those feelings and/or actions are not their own.

@TheTrentReport
https://youtu.be/bPIPSKruYRo
These traits are so nefarious and unconscionable that I have a hard time believing that anyone could harbor them. However, given the social, political, and economic climate that we are in, those in power who use their influence on controlling society most definitely possess these insidious traits. Everything that they do is all about control and since video games are the biggest market in the world, they want control over it and the communities built around it to accrue more wealth and to use that wealth to subjugate other cultures. Mainstream media is a tool as well as mainstream organizations and sites to help accomplish this goal.
The government recently announced its intentions towards what they believe is “GamerGate 2.0” and now even the ADL has made an official appearance, referring to gamers as “extremist’s”. We know EXACTLY what they are doing, and they aren’t even trying to hide it anymore because they don’t think we are aware of their motives. This is just a pretext for them to exert even more control and we know why, it’s because they want the influence we as a community have to must serve them. So here is what we do my fellow gamers-
“In light of recent events and years of mainstream stigma, we the members of the Global Gaming Community [GGC] must officially renounce ALL TIES to the corporate western video game market. We have been financially exploited through predatorial monetization schemes, pelted with numerous articles of disdain and intentional misrepresentation from game journalists, news outlets regarding us as dangerous individuals and, even subjected to inferior products not only riddled with bugs but also products meant to push political agendas. For the preservation of our community and its unique culture, apart from a few select game development studios we officially sever all connections to western owned video game companies & their mainstream affiliates. From this point onward, we will no longer support western corporate developers, journalists and publishers that do not coincide with the goals of our community.”
Naturally this is completely optional. If you are okay with the state of the gaming community as it is, feel free to ignore this. But if you wish for real change and a break away from oversaturated monetization in the games you play and the push for radical ideological reform, then you are in the right place. Lets sever these rotted miasmic ties once and for all so that our community can be preserved and made better for future gamers. If you agree with this, share it with whoever you think might be interested. The more gamers who get involved, the easier it will be for us to finally break free from mainstream game companies and their associates.

An hour after getting back from the Mason apartment, Bruce Kenner had the distinct misfortune of meeting Bertha Henderson.
A plump, gaudy woman with wrinkles and sun beaten skin only an alligator could love, Bertha Henderson wore bright red lipstick, bright red rouge, and way too much mascara. Her tangled hair was a dull red color and her clothes - pink pants and a white floral top - stretched tight across her bulbous frame. She looked like the kind of woman who lived in a trailer with velvet pictures of Elvis on the wall and pink flamingos in the front yard.
She acted like one too.
From the moment she stormed into his office, she hadn’t shut up once. She scolded, chided, accused, and badgered, sometimes even wagging one fat finger in his face like he was a naughty little boy. Ten minutes into the dressing down and Bruce was beginning to fantasize about police brutality.
It took him another ten minutes to find out what the hell she even wanted.
“It’s my granddaughter,” she shot back, “she’s missing in your town.”
My town? Lady, this is barely my office. I share it with three other people.
“Well, if you’ll calm down, maybe I can help.”
Jesus Christ was that the wrong thing to say. She hit the roof and didn’t come down again until Bruce was this close to arresting her for assault on a police officer. “Young man, I do not appreciate the way you’re talking to me. My tax dollars are the only reason you have a job. If it wasn’t for me, you’d be working at a car wash.”
At least I wouldn’t have to deal with you.
Bruce took a deep breath and held his tongue in check. “How can I help you?” he asked.
“I told you, my granddaughter is missing. If you listened to me, you’d know this already.”
Bertha produced a picture and slid it across the desk. Bruce studied it. A girl, roughly sixteen with black hair, blue eyes, and dimples smiled back at him. “She;’s with that Rossi man, I just know it,” she said bitterly.
“Who?” Bruce asked.
Rolling her eyes like he was stupid, the old woman told him the story. Jessie - the dimple faced girl - had the rotten luck of having to live with Grandma Bertha after her parents went to jail on drug charges. They lived in Sand Lake, a little town in the mountains outside Albany, where Bertha was no doubt loved and admired by all. One day, Jessie, who her grandmother lovingly described as “A little troublemaker”, ran off. Bruce didn’t blame her. He’d known Bertha for half an hour and he wanted to run off. Bertha did some snooping on Jessie’s laptop and found that the “little whore” had been chatting with an older man, Joe Rossi. Rossi, or so Facebook said, lived in Albany and worked at Club Vlad.
“I want him arrested for pedophilia,” Bertha said and crossed her arms defiantly over her chest. “He’s a dog just like all men. She’s probably pregnant already. Another mouth I have to feed.”
Behind the old battle ax, Vanessa appeared in the doorway and lifted her brows as if to say What a piece of work. Knowing her, she’d probably been standing just out of sight this whole time with McKenny, the elderly evidence clerk, and snickering into her hand like a little girl. LOL she called him young man.
Bertha noticed him looking over her shoulder and started to turn. Vanessa’s face went white and she ducked out of the way, narrowly avoiding detection. “I’m glad you think this is funny,” Bertha said to Bruce. “Meanwhile, if I don’t get Jessie back, the state’s going to stop sending me my checks. I need that income. I can’t work, you know. I have gout.”
Too bad being an asshole isn’t a job, you’d be world-famous
“I’ll go talk to him,” Bruce said.
“I want more than talk, young man, I want action.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
When Bertha finally decided to waddle off and ruin someone else’s day, Vanessa came in and sat in the chair the old woman had so recently occupied. “Oh, my God,” she said, “that was intense. I was this close to radioing in a 1015.”
1015 was code for officer down.
“Funny,” Bruce said without a trace of humor. He had kids going missing, a dead guy someone moved around like a goddamn Barbie doll, and now this. What next, hemorrhoids?
“What do you think? Code 1 or code 2?”
Code 1 meant top priority. Code 2 meant not a top priority. Bruce thought for a moment. It didn’t sound like Jessie Henderson was in danger. It sounded like she met a guy - granted, one too old for her - and decided to hide out with him from her psycho grandma. Maybe it could be something more, but he had a gut feeling that it wasn’t…and his gut feelings were usually right. “2,” he finally said. “I got shit to do.”
By shit, he meant “Talk to the families of those missing boys again.” He’d been interviewing them for two days looking for clues, but there was nothing. It’s like they just vanished. Bruce didn’t like this. He didn’t like it at all.
“Well, I’ll leave you to it,” Vanessa said and slapped the desk.
When she was gone, Bruce sighed.
Never a dull moment, he thought.
***
Ed Harris - no relation to the Hollywood actor - had been the medical examiner for the City of Albany since 2002, and in all that time, he had never seen anything quite like this.
It was Wednesday evening and Ed was locked away in the cold, sterile space beneath the city offices that comprised his domain. With its puke green tiles, harsh lights, and cloying smells of disinfectant, the .coroner's office creeped most people out, but not Ed. He was at home here, as comfortable surrounded by toe-tagged bodies as a cactus was surrounded by desert. A thin man in his fifties with curly, steel gray hair thinning in the middle, he wore a white smock, blood stained over his clothes that made him look like a butcher instead of a low level government functionary. He had a dark and dry sense of humor, but then again, so do all people who play with dead bodies for fun and profit.
The coroner’s office was a vast, utilitarian vault segmented into multiple different rooms. Here, where the magic happened, three stainless steel tables stood in a row; a bank of refrigerated drawers kept watch, making sure nothing funny happened. One of the cold fluorescent lights overhead flickered with a hum of electricity, and water dripped rhythmically from a faucet. It was a cold, eerie place, but to Ed, it was home.
On most nights, only one of the tables was occupied, but tonight, two were. On one lay an old lady who died of what appeared to be cyanide poisoning. On the other was Dominick Mason.
Naked save for a white cloth draped over his groin to protect his dignity, Dom was the most corpsy corpse you’d ever hope to see. In fact, if you looked up dead guy in the dictionary, you’d see a picture of him. His body was pale and sunken, one side covered in purple splotches where his blood had pooled, and his eyes were closed. His abdomen was slightly distended with the expected build up of gas, and his flesh stuck fast to the bones beneath. In other words, he was text book. A normal corpse.
Mostly normal.
As men of his trade are wont to do when strange bodies mysteriously appear, Ed had opened Dom up, making a Y shaped incision from his neck to his groin. He hummed to himself as he did so, his hands wielding his sharp and shiny tools with the deft assuredness of a seasoned surgeon. Done cutting, he dipped his gloved hands into the cavity and started removing organs. A spleen here, a liver there, nothing Dom would miss. When he got to the heart, however, he stopped.
There was something…off…about it. At first glance, it was black and withered like an oversized raisin. An odd and putrid odor emanated from it and though he was familiar with the various smells and stenches the human body produced after death, this wasn’t one of them. Try as he might, he couldn’t place it, couldn’t even compare it to anything. Plucking a magnifying glass from the metal cart next to the table, he peeled back part of Dom’s chest and examined the heart closer.
That’s when things got really weird.
Dominick Mason’s heart was, indeed, shriveled, but it was not black. Instead, it was almost entirely covered by an interlacing crisscross of what appeared to be black mold. Here and there, Ed could glimpse flashes of the heart beneath: It was wrinkled and a sickly gray color. “What is this?” Ed asked himself at length. He grabbed a pair of tweezers from the tray and carefully, very carefully, attempted to remove a piece of the mold for analysis. The moment the cold metal tips touched the heart, it gave a violent spasm that sent Ed falling back with a shocked gasp, the tweezers falling from his hand and clinking to the tiled floor.
The heart began to pulse like an alien egg sac, slowly at first, then more rapidly. For a moment, Ed was frozen in place, unable to comprehend what he was seeing. Once you die, your heart ceases beating. That’s that. Only living hearts beat, and Dominick Mason was certainly dead. He was dead from the moment Ed first laid eyes on him earlier that day and he was dead now. Yet there was his heart, beating anyway.
It could be a muscle spasm. They usually aren’t that violent and consistent, but dead bodies sometimes do strange things. As he watched the blackened muscle expanding and contracting, however, Ed had the most eerie feeling. He went to rub the back of his neck, realized he was still wearing blood soaked gloves, and stripped them off. He was spooking himself out; he needed a break and a hot cup of coffee. He’d come back fresh and start over again.
With that mold.
Could you really blame him for being creeped out? That stuff wasn’t normal. He’d never seen anything like that before, not even in textbooks. Dom was scrawny and didn’t get enough vitamins in life, but overall, he was healthy; that mold…or whatever it was…had no business being there.
Going over to the coffee pot, which stood in the same room to save travel time, Ed grabbed a styrofoam cup. When he was done here, he planned to go home and -
A terrible, metallic clatter rang out, and Ed jumped. He turned around, and when he saw Dominick Mason standing next to the table, hunched slightly over and staring at him, an electric burst of fright shot up his spine and exploded in his brain, so strong it made the edges turn gray. Pale, hands hooked into talons, and the flaps of his chest hanging open to reveal the cavity beneath, Dominick Mason looked for all the world like a boy who’d been caught sneaking out to meet his girlfriend. A weak, involuntary, “Oh, God,” slipped from Ed’s trembling lips, and the spell was broken. Dom came alive and ran toward the door leading out to the parking lot. He slammed through it, and the sound of it crashing open and then falling closed again echoed through the empty chamber.
Shaking, panting for air, and soaked in piss, Ed sank to the floor in a sitting position, his eyes wide and staring like those of a soldier returning damaged from the front.
It was a long time before he composed himself enough to call the police.
***
Dazed and caught in a nightmarish twilight realm where nothing made sense, Dominick Mason limped painfully down the sidewalk, a stranger lost in a strange land filled with danger and hostile creatures. Barefoot and shrouded in a white sheet, he trembled with cold and struggled to ignore the dark, threatening shapes looming from the fog in his brain, shapes that would turn into unspeakable truths if he let them.
Passersby openly stared at him, their expressions either morbidly curious, disgusted, or alarmed. A man put his arm protectively around his girlfriend; a woman pulled her little boy to her breast, and another man sneered at him, his nose crinkling. Dom, his glazed eyes narrowed against the harsh glare of the many street lamps, headlights, and storefronts, lumbered headlong toward nowhere, his fear growing until he was shambling. He imagined he could hear every cough, every whisper; smell the odor of every unwashed body. Each car horn was deafening, every whiff of ass or armpits sent his stomach churning. The rustle of a passing pedestrian’s jacket jammed into his ears like icepicks, and the approaching globes of LED headlamps burned his eyes. He gritted his teeth and groaned against the pain.
The dense mist wrapping his brain made it hard to think. Like a frightened animal, he made his way on instinct alone. Home. He needed to get home. Out here, on the street, he was exposed. At home, locked away in his small apartment, he would be safe.
A car passed in the street, bass heavy rap music blaring from its open windows, and Dom’s brain exploded with agony. He threw himself against a street sign and held on for dear life, his legs weak. Dizziness overwhelmed him, and he almost went down. He was also cold.
So, so cold.
People around him quickened their step; they never took their eyes off him, as though he were a venomous snake that would strike at any moment. He needed to get away from them. They were going to hurt him; people always hurt him.
Pushing away from the sign, he began to hobble once more toward home, wherever home was. He looked over his shoulder several times as he made his way down Central Avenue, and each time, he saw that no one was following him as he had feared.
No one, that is, except for the man in sunglasses.
Tall and lank with curly hair, he wore dark Aviators and a leather motorcycle jacket over a button up shirt. His hands were thrust deep into his pockets and his face showed no expression. He was always there, always a few steps closer. Outside Capital Fried Chicken, a group of people openly stared at him, He heard their whispers as he passed. What’s wrong with him? Dude’s straight tweakin. And the one that struck him the most. That guy looks dead.
Dom hobbled faster, as if to outrun the realization that he was, in fact, dead. The man in sunglasses was closer now, his footsteps so loud that Dom winced. He turned around, and the man was impossibly in front of him. Dom ran into him and bounced backward, going ass over tea kettle and landing on the former. They were in front of a church on a darkened corner, the lights here either burned out or shot out - you could never tell in Albany. Even though it was dark, Dom could see everything with crystal clarity. Dom tried to scurry away, but he was too weak to escape. Right there and then, he decided to give up. Come what may, he just wanted this nightmare to be over.
The man stared down at him, emotionless, unspeaking.
Dom squirmed.
“You’re real lucky I came along,” the man said. His tone was flat, even.
Dead.
“Get up,” he said, “I’ll take you home.”
Home?
Yes.
Dom wanted to go home.
The man helped him up, and Dom followed him into the night.
***
Bruce Kenner stood in the middle of the medical examiner’s office at half past nine that evening with his hands on his hips and stared doubtfully down at Ed Harris. The lonely cavern was alive with activity as cops went over everything, all of them looking either bemused or a mused. Bruce was neither. He’d been at home, sitting in his chair and having a beer in front of AEW Dynamite when Vanessa called. “You might wanna get down here,” she said, sounding confused, “something really strange is going on.”
Ed Harris - no relation to that one guy - sat in a straight back chair beside his cluttered desk and gripped a styrofoam cup of coffee in both hands, putting Bruce - for some reason - in mind of a monkey. When Bruce came in, the old man was white as a sheet and shook like a leaf. In the last half hour, little had changed.
“Tell me again,” Bruce said.
He and Ed were pretty good friends. He knew that Ed knew standard police procedure. Cops don’t ask you to repeat your story a thousand times over because they’re forgetful fucks, they do it because telling it again and again helps to jog loose details that you might have forgotten. Ed, therefore, did not protest. “I turned my back,” he said and chopped the chair like Jackie Chan, “and I heard the noise.”
His voice was thick, unsteady, and halting. He sounded as squirrely as he looked…and he looked pretty damn squirrelly right now.
“I turned around…and he was looking at me. He was standing there and he was looking at me.”
This was the fourth time he’d had Ed go through the story, and nothing had changed. Bruce felt something stirring deep inside his gut. It was either disquiet…or he had to fart. He opened his mouth to speak, but sighed.
“You don’t believe me,” Ed said.
“I dunno, Ed. Dead bodies don’t just get up and walk away.”
Ed flashed. “I know that, goddamn it, but this one did.”
Bruce glanced at Vanessa. She looked uncomfortable.
“Are you sure he was dead?” Bruce asked.
Ed opened his mouth, closed it again, and said, “I did the autopsy.” His voice broke on the last word, and he sounded almost like he was pleading. “His fucking liver’s on the floor. He stepped on it. The man has nothing in him. I-I’m telling you, there’s no way he’s alive.”
During the autopsy, Ed had sat Dominick Mason’s organs on the little tray table where he kept his pointy things. Mason knocked it over while getting up. Indeed, there were human organs on the floor, and one of them did look kind of squished. Bare, bloody footprints led to the exit door, up a set of concrete steps, and then disappeared in the alley behind the office.
“You said you left his heart,” Bruce said.
“And his brain,” Vanessa helpfully added.
Ed pinched the bridge of his nose like a put upon professor dealing with two particularly stupid students. “Even with his heart and his brain, he’s dead. You saw the livor mortis. He was cold, he was stiff. His heart wasn’t beating, he wasn’t breathing. He was in one of those drawers for nine hours, not breathing, no blood flow - it’s impossible. It’s just…it’s impossible. I don’t care what you think, he was dead. And even if somehow he wasn’t, I cut out almost everything. I opened his stomach, I took his spleen - you don’t just get up from that. You don’t walk away from that, much less run.”
Bruce chewed the inside of his bottom lip because he didn’t have a Twix. He didn’t look like the smartest man in the world…and he wasn’t…but he knew a dead body when he saw one, and the body they took out of Dominick Mason’s apartment was D.E.A.D. And like Ed said, even if by some freak fluke of nature he wasn’t, he couldn’t just get up and go about his day with no liver, spleen, or kidneys. Hell, Bruce had his gallbladder out and he couldn’t even walk away from that.
“You said there was something funny about his heart,” Vanessa said.
Ed finished off his coffee. “Yeah. It was…moldy. I-I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“Is it possible that…has something to do with it?”
“Unless the rules of biology have changed overnight, no,” Ed stated.
While Ed poured himself another cup of Joe, spilling some because he was still shaking, Vanessa took Bruce aside. “So what do you think?” she asked. “Is he telling the truth?”
For that, Bruce did not have an immediate answer. All else aside, he was a cop. He followed the evidence - and his gut instinct - wherever it led him. Ed was a sober man - he was not a drunk, insane, or stupid - and no man on earth could fake the look of trauma in his eyes. Bruce’s eyes went to the bloody footprints leading away from the exam table and his stomach roiled. It might be cliched, but there had to be a rational explanation. “Yeah,” he finally said. “The kid got up like he said, but there’s no way he was dead. Maybe…I dunno, he had a surge of adrenaline or something. I’m not a doctor.”
“That’ll only get him so far,” Vanessa said. “We’ll probably find him on the street somewhere.”
He went back to the purple splotches on Dom’s face, to his cold stiffness. There’s no way he was dead?
Bruce was confused, and he hated being confused.
“I dunno,” he said, “maybe.”
But he had the gnawing feeling that they wouldn’t. They would never find him…and Bruce would be confused forever.
Goddamn it, Mason, he thought, where are you?

Ep 27: Marry Your Trees
Recap Masterlist
Your girl's back for more vain hope of enjoyable McElnoise. Hope you all had a good Thanksgiving Christmas New Year's Eve Valentine's Day Easter eclipse May 3rd!
Yeah, so, uh... it's been a minute. I got distracted by a lot of excellent media, by my own writing endeavors, by my work schedule, by vacations, by the many slings and arrows of life, etc. And I just couldn't muster up the energy most days to even think about finishing Petals. But I really miss doing these, and I miss reading people's responses to 'em, so here I am again to blow this joint and move on to a certain kingdom of crystals, where hopefully my attention won't be led further astray.
You Boys Have One More Shot To Make This Arc Worthwhile

• Recap covers Garyl "dying", the one funny joke in the episode (Maarvey's corpse sliding off the wagon), Justin embiggening the motorcycle, and Merle hitting the button. Griffin's a coward for not including the bit where he had Hurley take out multiple enemies at once and then mocked the idea of rolling for it.
• Marzak
• Immediately after the button's been hit, the ram horns on the front of the wagon fold out and the tailpipes rattle, and the whole thing turns into a rocket-propelled arrow. And I must admit to some confusion right away, because we've established since Chapter Six that the big button is supposed to fire a giant harpoon, and that was what was going to catch them up to Sloan. A massive power boost has never been mentioned before. I've gone back over all my relevant recaps for this arc and I can't see a thing about it. Either this is a massive long-term mistake on my part, or we're in retcon town from the jump; we'll see whether the harpoon gets used later and decide. I will quietly sit here and go stir-crazy over it as we wait.
• Regardless, Hurley's wagon catches up to Sloan's winged hovercraft thing, as does Taako's motorcycle. Just in time, too, as the finish line -- and cliff -- are finally in sight! I'm counting my blessings Griff can't toss anything else in here to prolong it, barring Sloan earthbending more cliff into existence. Hurley and Sloan are both laughing maniacally as they grind up against each other (make your own jokes), both too caught up in the fun of the race at this point.
• Travis asks if anyone remembers why they even need to beat Sloan in the first place. This is a great question to hear from one of your players ten hours into your professionally recorded story arc. We're reminded that according to Hurley, beating Sloan in the race will cause her to immediately give up the Gaia Sash after realizing she's not all-powerful, which I would say still seems a little flimsy based on what little we've seen of Sloan's personality, but... feh. It's the least of Petals' problems.
• Unfortunately for them, Sloan's starting to pull ahead again! After we establish that it's still in jumping distance, Taako opts to stow his wand, throw the emergency brake on his giant bike, and pull out... the Wand of Switcheroo. Remember that? It's the wand he got from Fantasy Costco way back in the first shopping segment -- in Episode 9 -- that causes the target to switch places with him. Griffin is delighted that he remembered at all, and since he fucks up Sloan's Constitution saving throw (the first time he's actually had to roll for something Sloan does, natch), it works. Justin takes Sloan's place in the hover-canoe thing, while Sloan gets sent to the halting motorbike and falls rapidly behind.
• You know what? Big props to Griffin for allowing this deviation from a planned solution, even as he seems surprised and confused about how to proceed with the showdown. Let's just hope he doesn't give me reason to rescind the props.
• Griffin: "And that was enough. You, on this sleek battlewagon, are fired through the air like an arrow, through-" Travis: "I jump onto the canoe. I wanna win too." Oh, we know.
• Taako casts Gust of Wind to keep Magnus away, which turns this bit into a wonderful little playground argument as Travis, Justin, and even Clint start suggesting ridiculous back-and-forth blows to win the race. I'm not going to transcribe the whole thing because it's rather long, but it's so refreshing to actually perk up and laugh a little at something in this stretch of episodes.
• And with that... Taako crosses the finish line! Race is over! The great weights lift from my spirit! I know once again what it is to live and love!
• Wuh oh. He is still hurtling toward the cliff at top speed! Griffin explains that he can't find the brake in this battlewagon, and- oh, never mind. He was just doing a bit. Taako's good. Might have been room for some hijinks with a quick escape scene, but I'll let it ride just to get the fuck away from these vehicles.
• Time for what I think might be the first of Griffin's much-ballyhooed self-composed soundtrack! There's a whimsical, Zelda town-esque horn theme playing through Taako's victory celebration. Sounds pretty good.
• Hi it's me, Terthelt, ten seconds later. It is distractingly Zelda-y. I'll try to keep paying attention.
• Our heroes are so absorbed in congratulating Taako (and in Magnus' case, himself) for the win that they almost miss Sloan riding up on the bike, looking deathly ill at her loss. She clutches her chest as giant bolts of lightning erupt from her back, striking the ground and sprouting more of those damn vines as she goes. She drives straight off the cliff -- prompting Griffin to give Hurley an ear-piercing "SLOAN, NO!" -- but a giant gust of wind blows everyone back as they rush to check...
• And Sloan manifests a gigantic tornado a few feet from the cliff's edge, surrounded by thousands of ravens. It's almost like this plan to defeat her made no sense, y'all!
• Travis/Magnus: "I turn to Hurley, uh, s- let me do my voice, ahehehem: 'So uuuh, how's the whole beating her and she'll give us the sash thing going?" MY HERO.
• A despondent Hurley takes off her mask, to the collective gasps of the audience. Magnus follows and takes off his own mask, proudly announcing himself to far fewer gasps. Trav's on a roll this episode, it's been so long since my last listen that I almost forgot how much fun he can be when he plays along.
• Clint: "And I take my mask off and say, 'And I'm Bruce Wayne!'" Griffin: "O-okay. You all hear, uh, 'oh, okay, Mr. Wayne. Cool." Taako: "I'm actually a mongoose. Meow!"
• Hurley straps back into her car, seemingly intent on driving into the tornado to save Sloan, but Magnus hops on and preempts her heroic sacrifice, followed shortly by Taako ("No adventure would be complete without Weasel Man!"). Everyone shares a somber laugh, and then collectively stare awkwardly at Merle until he agrees to get in too.
• We quickly see the wagon's damage repaired, even as the mile-wide tornado is presumably bearing down on everyone, but then it's time for the showdown. At which point Griffin forgets the word "rev" and laboriously tries to describe how Hurley is holding the gas and the brake at the same time to make the cool noises like in the movies. Someone get our baby boy to a home, the fog is already taking him.
• The brake is released, and the car flies forward, straight off the cliff and into the massive birb vortex. Inside waits an enormous pillar of tangled vines, at the top of which waits a partially encased Sloan, fully overtaken by the Gaia Sash. Clint cuts through the drama to make a very lame Wizard of Oz reference, and is then bullied not for the lameness of it, but for daring to reference something so OLD and OBSCURE as THE WIZARD OF OZ.
• Dare I hope for a decent final boss battle here? There hasn't been a really entertaining bit of combat in Balance since Rockport, and even that was arguable compared to the heights of Gerblins. I'd like to remain optimistic, but given the vague bit I know about how this arc is going to wrap up, that's easier said than done.
• Hurley is now screaming in obvious delight at being sucked into a tornado, which feels a bit tone-deaf when she's staring down her horribly brainwashed (ostensible) lover. The four gab a bit about what to do, since she just drove off the cliff with no plan, before settling on using the harpoon to get in close. So I guess I was just wrong about where the harpoon was and what it was for. Nuts.
• Taako makes a ranged attack roll of 18 to blast the harpoon out, and it strikes true and digs in near the top of the vines without impaling the stricken lesbian. After a bit of reeling in, the wagon crashes down just under the platform, and everyone clambers up to confront Sloan. Griffin compares her current state to Gundren Rockseeker after he donned the fire gauntlet, and I'm just... struck, for a moment, at how long it's been since I listened to those episodes. Everything felt so much simpler then. In the podcast, and in my life... And if I'd stuck to my original schedule, I'd have finished all of Balance up long before now...

Terthelt Takes A Break To Eat A Mint Brownie At 11 PM On A Work Night

• Everyone's stuck for ideas, so Magnus asks Hurley what they should do, since she actually knows Sloan. Hurley sadly remarks that she might never have really known her, which is an odd thing to say about someone clearly brainwashed and out of her mind, but alright.
• Clint, beaming: "I cast ZONE OF TRUTH!"
• The madman actually does it. Faced with the ambient truth telling field, Magnus rolls a 12 (failure), Hurley a 17 (success, though I'd sooner shove Griffin in a Zone of Truth myself just to make sure), Taako an undisclosed failed number, and Sloan a 14 (failure). Merle immediately asks Sloan how they can defeat/save her, to which whatever's possessing Sloan (via Griffin's rumbling monster voice filter) yammers out a generic villain monologue about its power being absolute. Magnus: "What about the power of love?" Merle: "What about Jesus?" Taako: "What ABOUT Jesus? Where is that guy?' Magnus: "We haven't seen him in a dog day!" Merle: "We could really use some help right now!"
• Griffin suddenly cuts into the bit to ask the trio to make -- take a shot now -- Dexterity saving throws. Trav rolls 15, Justin 10, and Clint a pitiful 8. On cue, Sloan lashes out a vicious vine and knocks everyone down for 9 HP each -- a blow which Hurley obviously avoids gracefully, without a roll.
• At last, we're rolling initiative! Like this is some kind of D&D game or some shit.
• Taako's up first, but not before Sloan pulls back her vine and sprouts up a giant vine body to do battle. They banter for a bit about why they're standing on vines and how many boss fights in video games take place on floating vine arenas (I guess?); when his head's back in the game, Taako talks with Hurley and confirms that the gang didn't get the chance to rest after the race, so their options are mostly depleted. He casts a basic fireball on the plant colossus, destroying its head and setting it ablaze for a whopping 66 fire damage (33 doubled, since plants are unique among all other life for their hatred of being on fire). And that... might have been his last spell! Oh dear.
• Up next, Merle casts Prayer of Healing to heal the whole party. Nothing fancy, just a smart move he rolls well for.
• Magnus waffles for a minute on what he should do, but ends up making an attempt to pull the malevolent flora open and save Sloan manually. Griffin asks for a Sleight of Hand check just to get a handhold on the vines, and ever the tactical genius roller, Trav gets a 17 the moment Griffin says he needs to beat 15. He follows it up with a 26 (19+7) for Strength, even! AND that counts as a crit for him! I'm at the edge of my seat here, folks. He succeeds in ripping the vines apart and exposing Sloan, and then opts to roll a 23 (16+7) to punch her lights out. After all of that, all he succeeds in doing is making her bleed and laugh.
• The booming voice filter on Sloan is really taking me out of it. Not that I was super in to begin with, but it is mildly irritating whenever Griffin sees the need to do a grand evil cackle.
• Now it's Sloan's turn, and the vines immediately slam shut around Magnus, trapping him in the cavity with Sloan. Engulfed in pitch darkness, our stalwart hero manages to parry the next nebulously-described attack, but still takes 26 points of damage. Outside, the colossus regrows its head and summons a rain cloud to put the fire out, before taking a big spiky swing at Merle and Taako for 18 damage each. Justin says "hachi machi" for the second time this episode. You know, I've always seen people quote that when Justin's knee deep in drama, but I guess I happened to never listen to any MBMBAMs where he does it. This is an astoundingly pointless observation because I can't think of anything more interesting to say about the plant monster, and Clint already beat me to an Audrey II joke.
• Hurley's turn! What shenanigans will the DMPC grace us with this time? She hops right off the edge of the arena (to audible confusion), but floats back up holding the battlewagon's arcane core, and -- with another signature annoying Hurley one-liner ("Ready to do some pruning?") -- smashes it on the ground in front of Taako. From it emerge a swarm of glowing blue flecks, which Taako's staff turns inside out to swallow up, filling him with a surge of never-before-seen power; practically, this just means his spell slots are all filled up again. Sure, alright. It sounds like something that breaks some rule or another, but it gets Taako back in the game, and I'm just grateful she didn't do a flying meteor dropkick into a reverse German suplex for 800 unrolled damage and a free ice cream.
• On cue, Taako's turn. Justin jokes about casting Zone of Truth on himself to guarantee his cries of victory will come true, but decides to just throw out another fireball. He gets a good roll total at 32 (multiplied into 64 damage), only for Griffin to play cute with his description of how powerful Taako feels, urging him to keep rolling D6s as the fireball gets bigger and bigger. Our bewildered wizard proceeds to roll another dozen times and ends up with a combined total of 160 damage when Griffin finally tells him he can stop, gleefully describing what amounts to the sun itself manifesting from Taako's staff and blasting down upon the colossus.
• Yeah, I don't know. It's a cool moment, I guess. It was just handed to Justin on a silver platter without him having to think of anything or make use of his mechanics, but it's narrated colorfully enough. Probably I'm just being a curmudgeon about combat again.
• The sun explosion scorches away almost every vine, exposing Sloan (and Magnus, hi Magnus) before she immediately gets back to it. This time she summons a barrier of black-and-white thorned vines, which Hurley identifies as an infamous plant both venomous and cursed. Hurley urgently calls a huddle at the edge of the platform, gives the gang a big hug, and... blasts them off the arena, activating their safety harnesses. This- this can't be the end of the fight, right? They didn't even finish a second turn! Taako is the only PC who got to move twice!
• As our heroes watch helplessly, Hurley glows with a brilliant white light and charges into the brambles, beautifully radiating the light through the entire vine arena and the tornado itself before the trio black out. And that would seem to be the end of her(ley).
• So... yeah. I guess that's it? I knew a big heroic sacrifice was incoming, but I expected to have... any buildup or impact whatsoever, for how much it gets talked about. I expect I'll have more to say about this in a minute, but I'll let it ride for now.
• Travis: "We did it! And not a life was lost! No cost to ourselves!" Justin: "Another W for the good guys!" Travis: "We're gonna get a plaque for this one for SURE." Clint: "Yay us!"
• Once they're all done commiserating their grief, Griff brings the trio back to consciousness in a pool of water in the Goldcliff city center. Also in the pool is Sloan, now rejuvenated, cradling the sickly Hurley as infection visibly travels up her body. Alright, so at least there's more to it before they get sent off. I truly expected it to just fade back on the two dead.
• Hurley weakly moaning "You're in troublllle!" as the Militia sirens get closer is kind of cute, tbh.
• Sloan/Griffin/Hurley/this dialogue format was a mistake: "'This whole time, I was looking for something more powerful than this FUCKING belt.' Um, and she looks down at Hurley, and she says, 'I'm such a fool.' And Hurley says, 'Yeah.'" Taako: "Don't you have any healing magics? You're a cleric for crying out loud!" Merle: "Me?" Sloan: "The venom of the silverpoint...................... There's nothing to be done." Justin?/Taako?: "Horseshit!"
• Sloan makes a whispered agreement with the dying Hurley, and implores the party to never let something like this happen again with the other artifacts. With that, and another dramatic musical sting, the duo... explode into cherry blossoms and sprout into a giant tree, leaving only vague suggestions of their figures gnarled into the base, and the Gaia Sash resting alongside their racing masks.
• BRB shaking and crying
• ;--;
• Listened to Scissor Sisters' "I Can't Decide" on repeated loop at 1.5x speed, I think I'm all better now
• Griffin Dougie McElroy, you've done it again. You've played with my heartstrings and sent off a legendary heroine with the kind of panache Hollywood wishes they had. I'm going to adopt a ram in Hurley's memory.
• Ahem. With all of that settled, and with the ad break music fading in, Magnus and Taako glance over the tree and elbow each other a little over who's going to pick up the sash. Justin/Taako: "I notice Magnus reaching for Railsplitter and I say, 'Don't even think about it.'"

Ad Break, In Which I Digress On Gay Characters And The Burying Thereof
So. Yes. The lesbians turned into trees. As I said at the top of the arc, I did know this moment would happen in vague terms, I just had no idea what the context or execution would be. This moment stirred up a good bit of controversy over the subject of "Bury Your Gays", probably amplified in specificity by the 2015-2016 controversy over dead lesbians in various recent TV shows, and even now it's still debated whether killing Hurley and Sloan off this way was a good decision.
Bury Your Gays is a real thing, and it is still a broad issue, even as the landscape for representation has gotten much wider since 2015. Major rep is more important than ever, and will be until we no longer face such intense and constant extermination efforts. That said, it's a term best applied to trends, not universally applicable to every time a character on the LGBTQ+ spectrum is killed off or otherwise sent away. Imagine how fucking dull stories with diverse casts would be if queer characters were invincible. I love writing and experiencing diverse stories; I also love writing and experiencing things dark and full of violence and death. Some crossover is to be expected. What matters is that the death in question suits the story and the character, and doesn't feel malicious or denigrating.
To that end, is Hurley and Sloan's treensformation a case of Bury Your Gays? I wouldn't say so, even putting it in context of late 2015 (where there were already way, way, WAY better choices for sapphic rep than a D&D podcast by three cishet guys). Griffin definitely thought this would be a beautiful and poignant sendoff, and contorted the whole arc to build up to it. To the extent that Hurley and Sloan are characters at all, it fits them just fine. I can see a version of it that even rings home emotionally. Fang and Vanille's ending in Final Fantasy XIII -- which I would wager is what Griffin pulled this scene from -- is both more resonant and way more problematic.
My problem with Hurley and Sloan's sendoff is that they weren't a thing. There's hardly a gay relationship here to get upset about ending. Even with my thickest sapphic shipper goggles on, outside of the very first time Hurley talked about Sloan (where there were some innuendos that went right over everyone's heads), almost nothing about the two indicates that they're more than friends. They barely interact before the big pseudo-romantic death scene. Again, even in late 2015 -- mere months after the legalization of gay marriage -- there was substantially better on offer across various mediums. Seeing Hurley and Sloan held up as trailblazers of Real Lesbian Rep rings even falser now that I've seen their story. I feel nothing for these characters.
If Hurley and Sloan meant a lot to you at the time, and if you were invested enough in them to feel hurt by how Griffin sent them off, I don't say this to demean you. I would be genuinely curious to hear your takes. But I went in with low expectations to meet, and I'd be lying if I didn't call this whole thing unreasonably thin gruel for the hype.
Ad Break Finite

• Oh right, this is a D&D podcast I'm writing about.
• As we fade back in, Taako approaches the Gaia Sash, only for the evil voice from earlier (without the filter, so it's just Griff's scratchy little guy voice) to appear in his head with promises of unimaginable power. Taako's into it, but does his good boy job and resists its influence, only to be met with a critical fail roll of 9! And thus is Goldcliff menaced forevermore by the elemental sorcerer-king known only as The Mongoose -- nah, just as he's sliding the sash around his body, Hurley and Sloan's voices pop in and bid him-
• WAIT THEY'RE STILL ALIVE IN THAT TREE? THEY'RE NOT GHOSTS OR FUSED OR ANYTHING, THEY SOUND TOTALLY LUCID AND FINE. THAT WHOLE DIGRESSION WAS FUCKING POINTLESS
• Hurley and Sloan's voices pop in and bid him to be stronger, allowing him another roll with advantage. This time he rolls even worse with a 3. Before Griffin can conjure up a third lesbian in an icicle to cheer him on harder, Magnus rolls 22 to punch Taako in the head and Merle also rolls 22 to steal the sash off his body. Just one more in a long string of consequence negation, but I'll allow it on the basis that it's really funny and I'm taking anything to laugh at in this arc like a drowning woman clinging to chunks of driftwood.
• Gaia Sash: "Oh, a- a nature cleric?! I should've come to you first! Come on man, put me on!" Merle: "Nobody ever thinks of Merle..." Gaia Sash: "There's no vine you'll never be able to not fuck! I'll give you sexual conquest over anything, whether you wanna fuck an onion, or..." Everyone: [laughter] Griffin: "But you've beaten this thing in a- a test of wisdom." Merle: "I don't need your help, pal!" Griffin, gut punched: "Fuckin' an onion?!" Merle: "To have sex with an onion!" If nothing else, I'm glad this arc managed a perfect bookending brick joke.
• With his dominance over nature confirmed, Merle drops the Gaia Sash into his fanny pack and zips it up. Hurley and Sloan congratulate them on solving the problem, and just as the Militia surround the pool, Captain Bane (remember when I thought he was going to be the villain?) shows up and defuses the situation. We cut to Bane's office, where he asks for a rundown of the story and what happened to Hurley (Taako: "Tree now."), as well as inquiring how they've resisted three of these artifacts (they just did).
• With that done and several terrible tree puns made, Bane makes a toast to Hurley, urging the trio to drink with him. Aggressively urging. We only have like six minutes left in this arc, but holy shit, is there still time for my guess -- based entirely on this ridiculously minor character's name -- to be right?
• The gang see through it immediately and Taako casts Charm Person, but while he fails against Bane's 19 roll, it's enough for him to sense that Bane is already being mind controlled. He abruptly glows red(?) and stands up, smashing Merle and Taako's glasses and chugging Magnus', immediately dropping dead as the same silverpoint vine poison that did Hurley in takes effect. Behind him manifests another humanoid figure -- one whose features are completely hidden by a bright red robe. Magnus tries to beat the shit out of it, but it's completely incorporeal. I've been waiting on these guys to show up! All I know is that they're the main antagonistic force, and I think I remember some vague osmosed things to do with Stolen Century, but it's been long enough since I absorbed any discussion that it's all hazy. Excited to see if they're worth a damn.
• In a booming, echoey whisper, the red-robed figure asks repeatedly, "ARE YOU AFRAID?" The trio only have banter and piss-taking in response, up until it extends its arm and holographically projects a series of faces: Gundren Rockseeker, Magic Brian, Jenkins (god how I miss you Jenkins), Sloan, and Bane. It rambles a bit about the true nature of man, and we get our first namedrop of the Hunger being the all-consuming threat (that, as I've said before, I do know about) before vanishing. Everyone small-talks for a solid minute about how spooky it was.
• Taako: "Guys, I think- I think- if I was getting the right message from that, I think we're gonna need to turn our attention to one VERY important question... Do you think there was any prize money for the race, is that something we need to check back in on?"
• Griffin obliges and reveals that Bane had two hitherto-unmentioned briefcases on his desk, labeled 1 and 2, respectively nabbed up by Taako and Merle. Inside, respectively: 3,000 and 1,500 gold pieces! Taako decides to split it three ways for 1,500 gold apiece, which is fair, but so unlike the boot-stealing, silverware-hoarding maniac I fell in love with in arcs prior. Character development?
• Magnus loots Bane's body and takes his badge, and Merle obtains a little black vial of silverpoint poison. And then... the small talk about the Red Robe plays again? The fuck? The entire last three minutes of audio just loops as the progress bar continues, before resuming as normal for the actual end of the episode. I had to check the transcript to make sure I didn't miss anything in that time. Guess the official MaxFun upload just broke in a weird and specific way.
• Speaking of MaxFun, Justin rings us out by celebrating the season's completion and taking jabs at the idea of Kickstarter and Patreon. Make of that finely-aged milk what you will, dear jerkers. I got nothin'. I'm tired. That's all she wrote.

Post-Episode
Mostly about as boring as the past few episodes. I've already said my piece on Sloan and Hurley writ large, but the fight to get to the infamous moment was both mid and ridiculously short (I know, I know: "the food here is terrible, and such small portions"). Miraculously, though, things did pick up significantly in the last ten minutes of the episode. The trio seemed reinvigorated on the banter and improv front once the tree scene was done, and there was more to make me smile and chuckle in that home stretch than in pretty much the whole arc. I even liked the Bane / Red Robe scene as an ominous story beat! It's weird to end a Petals episode feeling generally positive!
Petals to the Metal, In Review
I think the fact that I took a full year to slog through the arc, nearly half of that just being procrastination on the final episode, speaks more to my opinion of Petals than anything scathing I could write.
The tower climb, the heist, the race, the showdown... every individual chunk of this storyline was an endurance test. Griffin really let out the worst of his DMing tendencies here, between the railroading, the fake rolls or complete absence of rolls, the ceaseless rimming of his own special characters to the minimization of the players, etc. And through it all, there were so precious few jokes and bits that actually landed for me.
I thought Rockport had a few serious issues, but it was sterling compared to this mess. All I can really admire about it is the ambition and the fact that the guys all sounded like they were having a good time for most of it.
Comedy Ranking: Rockport > Gerblins > Moonlighting > Petals
Quality Ranking: Gerblins > Rockport > Petals > Moonlighting
Here's to Crystal Kingdom being at least a change of pace, even if from what I hear, it'll be a lot more serious. And here's to me not taking another six months to do the next episode, however busy I am.

Hollywood is ready for its fresh summer releases- from biographical movies, to historical, and even teenage rom-coms- you have plenty of options to explore. After movies like Dune 2 and Kung Fu Panda 4- April is filled with even more exciting movies. So, without much delay, let’s scroll down and have a look at some of the most awaited Hollywood movies released in April 2024.
1. How To Date Billy Walsh 05 April 2024
A teenage rom-com drama to fill your weekend with a good mood! The movie is about Amelia and Archie- who have been best buddies since childhood. However, Archie has developed feelings for Amelia for quite a long ago. But, before he can confess his feelings- he realizes that Amelia has fallen for the new charming exchange student named Billy Walsh. What’s more baffling is the fact that the more he tries to create distance between Amelia and Billy- the more they come closer to each other. So, who is gonna end up with whom at the end?
2. Monkey Man 04 April 2024
A fast-paced action thriller that is not for the faint-hearted viewers! Monkey Man is the story of an unknown young man working at an underground flight club to make a living. However, his true intentions are to exact revenge on a corrupt and powerful leader who was involved in his mother’s death and is still murdering and torturing poor people who fall into their trap. Our dashing hero- Dev Patel has played the lead role- so, looks like a must-watch!
3. The First Omen 05 April 2024
This movie is the prequel to the classic cult horror movie of 1976- The Omen. This movie revolves around a young American nun who starts working at a church in Rome. She discovers some disturbing facts about the place- the dark secret of some powerful people trying to bring the antichrist.
4. Civil War 12 April 2024
It is a dystopian thriller about a time in the future when a second civil war has broken in America and the government ruling the country is no less than a dystopian dictator. Not just that, an extremist military group is also highly active in the US and is committing political violence everywhere. While everything is in chaos, a group of journalists are roaming across the country to bring awareness among people and save the country and its people from all the violence and injustices.
5. Rebel Moon Part 2 – The Scargiver 19 April 2024
It is an action-adventure film directed by Jack Snyder that carries forward the story of the 2023 movie- Rebel Moon. This final installation will tell how Kora, the warrior woman, and her group of warriors are together ready to fight the Motherworld and save their galaxy. For all the fans of this sci-fi Netflix movie franchise- it is a must-watch!
6. Abigail 19 April 2024
Were you waiting for a horror thriller to release in April? Well, then Abigail is here to scare you! The movie revolves around Abigail, a little ballerina and the daughter of a powerful underworld member- to take revenge on him. They take her away into an isolated mansion- what they don’t know is that Abigail is a tiny vampire who gets active at night- she is ready to hunt them down one by one!
Read More: Abigail
7. Challengers 26 April 2024
It is a sports drama with a pinch of romance sprinkled all over! The movie revolves around Art Donaldson, a Grand Slam tennis champion who has been on a losing trip for a long time. His wife, a tennis prodigy turned coach is sad to see her husband losing matches and hope. So, she forces him by using an unusual trick- asking him to win against her former lover in a challenge match!

I slept in this morning, well I dozed. Then I showered. Then I did some tiny chores. Then I got the fright of my life when a huge green grass hopper leapt at me INSIDE the house. Then I did some drawing and made some little things with clay. Then I read my book. Then Andy called. And now it’s 5:11pm. So… a wild Saturday for me. I feel kind of flat. I feel quite flat. I feel flat. I just don’t want to be hence me saying “quite” etc. I’ve had negative thoughts, mostly about thinking I should end things with him, I just feel like he deserves better. I’ve got through each thought by reminding myself he is an adult man who is capable of making the best decisions for himself. I guess. So. Anyway. He talked me through his ig feed and I couldn’t help but wonder if he realised how I would overthink when we last talked about it all. Because a couple days ago he said his explore/search (?) page, was filled with naked women, but today it’s filled with animal pages and funny videos. And I still stand by my thinking the other day, I’m well aware I am not enough, nor will I ever be enough, so I cannot blame him for needing/wanting to look at pretty women if I cannot be that for him. I only have myself to blame if I feel upset. I don’t believe he is the kind of guy who is pervey with stuff online, I think he’s just a regular guy in that regard, maybe even less pervey than the average guy idk, so I don’t think his social media is saturated with naked women or whatever, but I’m not going to be naive enough to think he doesn’t look at that stuff. I mean that time he accidentally sent that photo of an naked girl to me, and then he said it was something to do with reddit stuff but I mean, idk how a regular looking naked girl has anything to do with a video game, she wasn’t dressed up in any way to look like a character. Or the fact it took him all of 0.8 seconds to send photo examples of risqué things. Like sure it’s easy enough to google, which makes me feel like a prude now because I realised I never look up stuff like that online, but I mean to find exact examples so quickly? You either know exactly what to search for or you have it already set aside. And again it’s whatever, I’m not upset. Old me would get upset, current me… I’m learning to accept it. If therapy can bring me to some kind of deluded state where I believe I’m enough for someone, let alone him, then I would like to have already learned the lesson that even if I believe I’m enough I will have the ability to deal with reality aka I’m not enough because I KNOW I’m not. This isn’t self pity, it isn’t self hate, it’s just a cold hard fact. And yes it upsets me a lot, a LOT, it’s the worst feeling in the world to realise you will never be enough for someone, but if I’m going to not be alone then I need to learn to deal with this. None of this makes sense does it. Whatever I cbf trying to make it make sense. I doubt I’ll ever reread these anyway.
I also learned he thinks Blake Lively is gorgeous, which yeah duh of course she is. I feel like he’s mentioned her before though. But that f’s me off, because she has had a lot of plastic surgery and cosmetic work and he will judge me for it and tell me to not do anything and there he is fawning over a woman who has had a hell of a lot of cosmetic work done. She’s had a nose job (likely more than one), upper bleph, boob job, veneers, Botox, lip filler and that’s just me looking at a before and after photo. I think she looks incredible now, I don’t think she looks overworked at all and everything is natural but I think she was crazy pretty before with her old nose and hooded eyes and gummy smile and stuff too - things I wouldn’t typically think are pretty because I’m a horrid nasty girl but she was just PRETTY. So pretty. I think I’m also biased because I’m a big fan of hers anyway, as much as a fan I am of any celebrity anyway which is minimal. But anyway. She’s had so so much work done, but he gets so goddamn critical with the idea of me wanting a nose job or a boob job - two things she’s had and he thinks she’s beautiful. Why is it one set of rules for me and another for other women? He has no idea the amount of work celebrities have done. Even Ana d-A, who is probably my ultimate girl crush (as well as Monica Bellucci) and I’ve read several accounts from plastic surgeons/experts etc who can point out surgeries she’s had - nose job (likely more than one), lip filler, slight buccal fat removal and Botox along the jaw to slim the face as well as a chin implant (which apparently are really quite common with famous people?), veneers and that’s just what I remember. But she looks so naturally beautiful - probably because she is and I don’t think she needed a speck of work done but I think when you’re in Hollywood there are expectations so idk - but even she’s had a lot of work done and I bet he doesn’t even notice or think she has. And yet he will tell me to not touch my face. It’s such a double standard and I hate it. But then if he told me I should get cosmetic changes to me then I would probably never recover, so idk, he loses either way and I know this isn’t about him. I just hate that he can’t seem to see it, THAT ISN’T THEIR NATURAL FACES AND BODIES. And even if he did see it or did know, he would still think of them as ideal women. Because they are. So they can get help to prettier by shrinking their noses, inflating their lips, literally changing their eye shape, getting implants in their boobs or ass or whatever else. So they can get help and he thinks they’re beautiful and doesn’t have a negative thing to say. But if I think about it? I get criticised and told off for even contemplating it. So I have to stay this ugly critter with a big nose and ugly lips and all of that, but they can change whatever they like and he doesn’t care and will think they’re beautiful. Why can’t I try and be pretty? I can do what I like though, I will always err on the side of caution, I would rather have a naturally busted looking face like I do now than look surgically deformed. But a tiny tweak to my nose here, some filler to my lips there, some work on my boobs… that’s all I want. But spending tens of thousands of dollars on that sort of thing… I will do my boobs, I don’t think I will ever actually touch my nose. I want to so badly but if I had to choose between new nose or new boobs I would choose boobs. Anyway. I’m not upset with him, I’m just upset with myself. I’m upset that I have to live my life looking the way I do. Anyway. Whatever. It doesn’t matter.
It’s later but I feel so bad, I feel like I was mean about him in my last paragraphs? Idk. I didn’t mean to be. I know it doesn’t matter but still I have to write this to appease my guilt :(
I’ve had Britney’s crazy song stuck in my head all day. I listened to it maybe five times while playing with my clay earlier today, I love it so much. It makes me feel so dancey, but choreographed dancey. I remember when I was little I would make up dances in my bedroom to my favourite songs and it was my favourite thing. And I remember being a teenager and I’d fall asleep listening to music, like just whatever music I liked at the time not sleepy music. Anyway I’d be laying in bed falling asleep but still wiggling around to the music and I remember my friend S, well “friend” in retrospect, when we’d have sleepovers and sleep in the same bed I’d still have headphones in and be wiggling around til she’d kick me to stop but in like a light hearted way. That was really rude of me to do, but I feel like when you do something so often you don’t really think about what you’re doing yknow? Idk. Like still now, I’ll be working away and bopping my head around and mouthing along to the lyrics and not realise. I think that’s just normal human nature, no? It is, it definitely is. Anyway. I remember falling asleep dancing away to I wanna dance with somebody for a loooong time. And the copy of the song I had had a slight glitch in the beginning so I would time that glitch into my dance too. I’m listening to it now and I still do it, like at the same time wiggling my hips around and my shoulders at the other part lil body rolls at the other time. I say this because I’m lying in bed writing this listening to it. This is all sounding so cringe. But on the off chance I do read these one day I want to remember my dancing to sleep because it was fun and I should do it more. It’s probably also good practice to fall asleep to noise again considering I’ll be sharing a bed with sweet honey Andy who is a menace for falling asleep to noise. Sweet baby. My baby.
I just watched the cutest movie!!! I loved her outfits so so much. I want to know where the beaded handbag was from. I loved the suede tote but I already know that it’s Isabel Marant but I can’t find the beaded one anywhere! I know I can’t afford it anyway but still. Her wardrobe in the movie though, utter heaven. Heaven heaven HEAVEN. Like even the knit and jeans combo I think from memory when she drops off her daughter at camp? A dream. I think I need to rewatch purely to take photos of her outfits. But also it’s Anne H wearing them and she is the epitome of beauty sooo that makes everything look better. And her lip colour in it, I need to know what’s on her lips. Anyway now I wanna read the book, except they don’t end up together in the book so maybe I don’t want to read it.
I don’t know whTs wrong with me. I can’t stop crying. I stopped for a bit so went to brush my teeth before bed and mid-brush I started crying again. I just feel like even on my best days I still have this deep rooted sadness inside me. And if it’s not sad, it’s a numbness. I feel so broken and Im wondering if I’m even fixable.
Now I have a splitting headache from the crying. Ffs. I will read for a bit and when I finish a cute scene that makes me feel nice I will put my book down and go to sleep. That’s my plan.
I don’t want to journal bye

NEW JERSEY
RHONJ Preview: Glass is Shattered in Dramatic Fight as Rachel Calls Teresa “Hotdog-Lipped,” Jennifer Hints at New Friendship With Melissa, and Teresa Shows Jackie What “Real Friends Are Like” Amid Margaret Feud (Reality Blurb)
CAST DIVIDED RHONJ cast planning ‘separate’ premiere parties as Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga ‘can’t be in the same room together’ (The US Sun)
Teresa Giudice Reveals What Was "Really Good" About Her 15-Month Prison Sentence (Bravo)
How Jennifer Aydin Upgraded to a 9-Carat Canary Yellow Diamond Engagement Ring (Bravo)
Jennifer Aydin Gives a Tour of a Room in Her House "That Nobody Touches" (PHOTOS) (Bravo)
Who Is Dolores Catania’s Boyfriend, Paul Connell? Meet the Entrepreneur (Bravo)
Dolores Catania Says ‘RHONJ’ Fight at Rails Steakhouse Is the ‘Finale of a Lot of Relationships’ (Exclusive) (Us)
Melissa Gorga Teases RHONJ Season 14 Finale: ‘So Dirty and Just Not Good’ (Reality Tea)
Melissa Gorga ‘Never’ Thought Teresa Giudice Feud Threatened Her Place on RHONJ (Reality Tea)
Melissa Gorga Says Season 14 of ‘RHONJ’ Won’t Be Filled With ‘Family Drama’: ‘It’s Refreshing’ (The Wrap)
RHONJ Star Rachel Fuda Says Husband John’s 50-Lb. Weight Loss 'Definitely Improved' Their Sex Life (People)
RHONJ Star Says He Was ‘Being Attacked’ While Filming New Season (Heavy)
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Kyle Richards Makes a Major Change and Removes Umansky from Her Instagram Bio (Bravo)
Kyle Richards Takes You Inside What a "Good Morning" Looks Like at Her House (PICS) (Bravo)
Kyle Richards Says These $18 Bracelets Look like Real Diamonds and Make Great Mother's Day Gifts (E!)
Kyle Richards Reflects on ‘Favorite Moment’ With Lisa Vanderpump (Reality Tea)
Lisa Rinna Leaving Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Was Her Best Decision, Here’s Why (Reality Tea)
Marcellus Wiley: 'Real Housewives' Wasted My Damn Time! (OutKick)
ORANGE COUNTY
Tamra Judge Gives a Peek at Her Gorgeous Kitchen While Having a Very "Good Morning" (Bravo)
MIAMI
‘Housewives’ OG Comments on Former Co-Star’s Sudden Divorce (Heavy)
BRAVO
A HISTORY OF REAL HOUSEWIVES ATTENDING THE MET GALA (Fashionista)
Ranking The Real Housewives cast by the whopping amount they’ve spent on plastic surgery (The Tab)
Gypsy Rose Blanchard Says ‘Vanderpump Rules’ Eatery SUR Is ‘Serving and Slaying’ During Visit (Us)
One Year After Scandoval, an Expanded Vanderpump Universe (The New York Times)
Andy Cohen Explains ‘Vanderpump Rules’ Summer Pause on Season 12 Production (The Hollywood Reporter)
Ariana Madix Admits Money Played a Part in Pump Rules Return (Reality Tea)
Jeremy Madix Admits He’s “Side-Eyeing” Ariana Madix’s Boyfriend Daniel Wai, Applauds Lala Kent for Being “Protective” Amid Vanderpump Rules Feud (Reality Blurb)
Lala Kent exposes her baby bump AGAIN in a racy maternity look while out in LA - amid news Vanderpump Rules is pausing production for the summer (Daily Mail)
Brock Davies Reveals His “Uphill Battle” at Home: “Not Every Day Is a Success” (Bravo)
Brock Davies Is a Totally Different Man Before and After His Hair Transformation (Bravo)
Garcelle Beauvais’ Son Oliver Saunders Slams ‘Shocking’ Vanderpump Rules Editing (Reality Tea)
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Kristen Doute’s Co-Star Says He Planned on Being Her Sperm Donor (Heavy)
Janet Caperna Reveals Whether She’ll Be Friends with Kristen Doute Again: “It Was a Pause” (Bravo)

So Exposingsmg is essentially a blog that would post gossip about celebrities that... wouldn't be submitted to the Daily Mail, but they completely break the ethical rules of journalism by saying "my source said " blah blah blah (insert complete dangerous lie that can easily be disproven)
They started their blog out targeting Selena Gomez and accused her of abusing Justin Bieber, cheating on Justin Bieber, manipulating Justin Biebers mother, bullying people like Demi Lovato, and weirdly enough, sending Niall Horan and unsolicited nude pic when he supposedly had a "secret" girlfriend (That esmg didn't mind exposing despite the probably NDA breaches and lack of respect for Niall's privacy). They also allege that Selena is FAKING her lupus. No proof of any of this whatsoever, which is disgusting.
Then after about two years of making these baseless accusations, they started to widen their market and "expose" EVERYBODY. This included celebrities like Meghan Markle, Olivia Wilde, Emma Roberts, Emma Watson, Taylor Swift, Camilla Cabello (who ngl, isn't that nice of a person but you can gather that information by just a google search), Demi Lovato, and Amber Heard.
I would write an ESSAY about all the things ESMG have done but I want to mainly focus on Amber.
I'm not going to share their blog but they made an accumulation of statements that can be proven false by reading a court document. They also discussed Ambers sexuality in a disgusting way by claiming she would only sleep with men for a "career advancement" and that she was only with Johnny "for his money" (even though she took way less than she was entitled to at the divorce and pledged to give it all to charity)
They said that Amber was the aggressor of abuse and Johnny NEVER hit her (even though there's proof he did). They used Ambers "I was not punching you, I was hitting you" audio as their "credibility" while ignoring the transcript that have her apologising and admitting that she did it because she was so used to getting physically assaulted by him and not fighting back (Johnny is radio silent throughout all of this)
They claimed that Amber cheated on him during the relationship (even though they claimed Johnny did too, but didn't care about that enough)
They used ADAM WALDMAN as backup for their claims, along with articles from the Mirror and TMZ (which was hilarious and... based on other blog posts, kinds typical of them)
Alleged Elon Musk donated anonymously on behalf of Amber Heard for the children's hospital. They also complained that Amber didn't donalte the money for 3 years (when as far as I know, they story behind that was not disclosed, Johnny kept suing her and the ACLU and CHLA never complained publically). Even though this could be true, I dont care, it doesn't make her a liar
Right this is a ridiculous one, they claimed that the UK trial was rigged bc everyone was in cahoots of Amber when Amber... according to that chart they released only met 3 people who were... kinda higher up in the UK law, then who knew people who knew people who knew Dan Wooton and Andrew Nicol.
Now I'm from Ireland and I know A LOT about the Sun. Ever since the tragic Hillsbourgh disaster in 1989 (where they victim blamed the fans who died and suffered loss that horrible day), The Sun LOST most cases where people had sued them. It was RARE that they won this particular case. That's why this whole thing is ridiculous to me. And... just because the Sun accused Johnny of DV. Never meant they cared about Amber.
Also, its laughable how they ignored all of Johnny's connections and the way he sued her for the op ed (that had no indication of "Amber accusing Johnny")
They alleged that Johnn'y s family hated Amber, yet ignored Lily Rose's message to her father admitting how Amber being in the relationship brought her closer to him. And ignored how Loly Rose Depp never speaks about Johnny and changes the topic whenever he is brought up. They also use the title of an article of his sister supporting him as "proof" even though she is claimed to have used his money as her own.
Apparently, according to these two credible sources that would never be biased. Amber kept Johnny on drugs and did drugs herself. In the real world, everybody kept Johnny on drugs but her. She was held accountable by her therapist for enabling him and she did everything in her power to help him (cause... yk... she was a 25 year old with a man near his 50s).
The "source" (who was definitely impartial and totally not probably on Johnny's payroll. Oh wait, it is indicated they were actually friends) said he "Cared a lot about her". Yet he showed that by trashing her dressing room, butting her in the forehead, kicking her on a plane, pulling hair out of her scalp, calling her an "over the hill stripper" and a "c*nt", vandalising her ex girlfriends painting and controlling her healthcare by sending her to one of his therpises who would victim blame her for everything (This is just everything that's been proven). It's sad.
The rest of what she said was the same bullshit rhetoric that is on the internet, or that Depp fans try to claim. Despite the fact Johnny was clearly filled with yes men who should have helped him years ago rather than fueling his addictions, it NEVER excuses how he treated Amber. The abuse through the court system and controlling her healthcare Proved to me that this isn't quick incidents that he immediately regrets. He planned all of this. he intended to humiliate her and emotionally ruin her.
Other things ESMG have done:
This is a blog who intends to blame women for what has happened to them, OUT women as queer when these women never admitted to it themselves (but they don't out men and blame the mainly female fans for their theories/beliefs on certain relationships, so... typical misogyny) they OUTED certain alleged survivors of SA when those certain survivors never claimed to have endured that, or even worse, may not have been ready to admit it (so... ESMG may have been taking away THEIR story to tell). They talk about Dark Hollywood but never went into detail about certain individuals who were the abusers (but had no problem, in one post, victim blaming a certain celebrity for "cozying up" to their abusive director).
They are not a nice blog, most, if not, all of the sources (if they had any) are probably biased. If you call them out on any of this, they'll most likely call you stupid, an idiot or a moron and waffle about their credibility. So yeah...
To end, I admire Amber for her resistance while going through the worst things anyone can go through. She didn't make it difficult for DV survivors, Johnny did, the American Justice System did, the world supporting Johnny did (intentional or not) and blogs like ESMG do.

Rachel Lindsay's estranged husband Bryan Abasolo accuses the Bachelorette star of using community funds to pay her high-priced divorce lawyer but refusing to give him access to the money.
According to court documents obtained by RadarOnline.com, Abasolo asked the judge presiding over their bitter divorce to have Lindsay pay him $75k to help with legal fees and to hire a forensic accountant to comb through her finances.
The 44-year-old chiropractor filed for divorce in January after 4 years of marriage. He listed the date of separation as December 31, 2023.
Abasolo demanded Lindsay pay him monthly spousal support. In his financial documents, he listed his income as $1,700 per month.
Abasolo said he had $781k in real and personal property but little to no funds in the bank. In the filing, he said Lindsay lives with him and pays some of the household expenses.
He said he had $781k in real property but next to nothing in the bank. He said he had owned properties in North Hollywood and Miami, an air fryer, gym equipment, his $1k wedding band, and $51k in investment accounts.
Abasolo listed his 2 businesses as being “not yet valued.
In his new filing, Abasolo said he needed assistance from Lindsay to pay his lawyers to get a fair settlement in the divorce.
He said he is still living with Lindsay but “neither of us wants to continue to live together.” He said, “Our current living situation is very awkward and strained. We generally do not even talk to each other and try to avoid each other. Rachel has security cameras outside our home. Only Rachel has the credentials to the security cameras, and Rachel can monitor my comings and goings.”
“I want to move out of our family residence as soon as possible, but maintaining our standard of living is not financially feasible at this time,” he said. “I placed my career as a chiropractor on hold to move twice for Rachel’s career. These moves were detrimental to my Chiropractic business, while Rachel’s income and success as a media personality skyrocketed.”
Lindsay’s ex added, “I am informed and believe that Rachel has been using our community property monies to pay for her divorce lawyer and forensic accountant, while refusing to give me access to any of our community property funds to pay my divorce lawyer, my forensic accountant, or any of my personal expenses.”
Abasolo claimed Lindsay “is claiming that our Family Residence is her sole and separate property, even though I believe that the majority, if not all, of the $466,000 down payment on our Family Residence came from community property earned during our marriage.”
He said he needed the $75k to pay his legal team and for the forensic accountant. A judge has yet to rule.
Lindsay and Abasolo met on season 13 of The Bachelorette. They got married in 2019.
As we first reported, Lindsay hired powerhouse divorce lawyer Laura Wasser.
Wasser’s previous clients include Dr. Dre, Kim Kardashian,, Kris Jenner, Ariana Grande, Kelly Clarkson, Christina Aguilera, Joe Manganiello, Britney Spears and countless others.
Abasolo spoke out after filing for divorce. "After more than 4 years of marriage, Rachel and I have made the difficult decision to part ways and start anew,” he told his social media followers.
"My parents have been married forever and I'm a family man, but sometimes loving yourself and your partner means you must let go," he continued. "I wanted you to hear it from the source before the blogs start making up their own reality. Please respect the spaces of our family and friends as we figure out our next steps."
https://radaronline.com/p/bachelorette-star-rachel-lindsay-estranged-husband-bryan-pleads-support-move-out-controls-security-cameras/

Do I knock AFTER i have taken a card, or do I have to wait another round ? or when I discard ? (sorry my english is not so good)
And second: I think Gin Rummy would be better, if there are possibilities where both can make points, i do not like the "one gets everything and the other one gets nothing" gamestyle.