In hindsight, I should have known something was wrong with The Caeles Academy of Acting.
Maybe the fact that it doesn't exist to the outside world.
This place prided itself on famous alumni it didn't actually name, and a once in a lifetime opportunity to work with the best in the business.
It's what I wanted.
More than anything.
After enduring four years of high school with barely a semblance of a drama club (we met every month, and our teacher was an alcoholic), and countless failed auditions, I was ready to take my acting career seriously. I had one year.
According to my parents, I had one year to make a living from my passion.
If it didn't work out, I would be on the first plane back to Connecticut.
It's not like they didn't trust me. I think they were just scared I wouldn't be able to financially support myself. So, I got a job right out of high school and slipped a year. Drama schools are expensive, and college’s are cut-throat on who they take on. I found Caeles Academy by accident–or, I guess it found me?
After researching cheap drama classes, auditions, academy’s, literally anything to progress my career, an ad popped up.
Not exactly flashy.
Just a date, a time, and a promise that they only take the best. I ignored it, but throughout the week, I started getting more ads. Just the words, “IMPRESS US - - JOIN CAELES ACADEMY NOW.”
Followed by, “BE WITH THE BEST, AND BE THE BEST. JOIN THE S CLASS NOW.”
When I googled the academy, nothing came up.
I gave up, clicking on the ad, which sent me straight to an application form.
I filled in my details as more of a joke. But I wasn't expecting to get an email back. Again, it was a time, a date, and that exact same tagline: “Impress us.”
However, Caeles Academy was different from what I imagined.
I was expecting a university building, or at least some modern structure.
Judging from their marketing and ads, I figured they could at least afford decent premises. Though I was mistaken. When I stepped out of the Uber, I found myself staring at what looked like an abandoned office tower, a red-brick monolith in the middle of nowhere.
Which was crazy, because I swore a girl wearing a bikini had strode through the doors, with nothing but her phone, and a coffee tucked under her elbow.
According to the text sent from the academy, the auditioning rooms were on the third floor.
Tipping my head back, the checkerboard of broken windows didn't exactly instil confidence.
Neither did the clunky set of automatic doors that took a while to open.
It was a summer's day, and the heat was already baking through my dress, sweat sticky on the back of my neck.
I wanted to make a good impression, but the heels were a little over the top.
Though I had also seen a girl casually walk in wearing a two piece bikini.
“Well?”
Freddie’s voice made me jump. I forgot I was on the phone to him. I was excited the whole car-ride, already high on five coffees, and now I was silent.
If I perceived the ‘academy’ from an objective standpoint, it definitely looked like the perfect place to be brutally murdered. But my own personal opinion was it was.. okay.
“What's it like?”
I pretended not to see a rat scuttling under an old candy wrapper.
“It's… fine.”
“Just fine?”
I could hear the smirk in my friend’s tone. He couldn't wait to tell me it was a scam, and had been reminding me all week I was essentially willingly selling myself to the black market. I was stubborn, so, fine sounded better than my initial first impression.
Which was to turn around, walk away, and completely block the place from my memory.
Unfortunately, at that moment, I valued my pride over my awareness.
“It's… okay.” I said, trying to find positives. I was staring at a looming grey building with shattered windows and a resident rat living near the door. I had a hard time figuring out how the girl from earlier had just casually strode inside, barefoot too. I glanced down at the ground, immediately regretting it.
Like there weren't bits of chewing gum and grime stuck to the concrete.
“Huh.” Freddie said, his tone creeping into teasing territory. “You're really selling it.”
“It just looks like a building,” I muttered, my gaze glued to the rat, who looked a little too comfortable.
Maybe it was a pet.
I was getting progressively more infuriated the more I stared down this place. Judging from the decades old writing ingrained into the door, it used to be a dentist surgery. “What do you want me to say?” I wasn't even trying to hide the scorn from my voice. “It's a building that looks like an academy.”
“Can you send a picture?” Freddie asked, “Ooh, wait, I'll face-time you.”
“That's, uh, that’s not really necessary–”
I was cut off, suddenly, when a guy threw himself through the automatic doors, palms first. He took two stumbled steps forwards, one back, and lifted his head, half lidded eyes finding the sky, before dropping to his knees and heaving up pinkish liquid.
I could see him trying to hold it in, slamming his hands over his mouth, only for it to splurge through his fingers, showering the ground in greyish pink froth.
Like he'd downed a bottle of Pepto Bismol.
Inching towards him, I realized it was Pepto Bismol.
The stink made my own stomach churn.
“Missy?”
I found my voice. “Uh, can I call you back later?”
Before my friend could answer, I ended the call, slipping my phone in my pocket.
The guy was still heaving, coughing up globules of pink.
“Are you okay?”
The sound of my heels click-clacking on concrete made me cringe. The guy noticed, flinching away. Closer, and I could see his scraggly blonde hair.
He was handsome.
Without the bile spewing down his chin.
Early twenties, wearing a fitted white shirt now covered in streaks of bright pink. Part of me wanted to make a half-hearted joke, but getting even closer, so close I could smell his pepto-breath, I noticed he was trembling, his hands clenched into fists.
When I attempted to awkwardly pat him on the shoulder, he twisted around, so fast my morning coffee slithered its way back up my throat.
His eyes were wide, almost feral, studying me like a wild animal.
I noticed the whites of his pupils were red, like he'd burst a blood vessel.
Theatre kids were intense, though I had never met THIS kind of intense.
“Are you… going in there?” The guy’s voice was a child-like whimper I wasn't expecting.
It looked like he was slowly regaining clarity, staring down at his filthy shirt, his hands stained bright pink.
I nodded, uncertainly, offering him my water. “Yeah. Did you audition?”
He shoved it away, slapping himself in the face. “I… I don't know.”
“You… don’t know?”
Suddenly, it was like something had contorted in his expression, a switch being pulled. I wasn't expecting him to twist around so fast. The guy slowly cocked his head, his lips breaking into a grin. His eyes, however, stayed the same.
“Of course I've auditioned.” He said, with a laugh.
“It was the best experience of my life!" His mouth formed an almost mocking frown.
“Unfortunately, I didn't make the cut. Which is a real shame. I'm sure Caeles would have benefited from my talents.”
What was weird, is that his mouth was moving, but he wasn't even looking at me, frenzied eyes caught in an oblivion I couldn't see.
When he did look at me, his expression crumpled all over again.
Pepto jumped to his feet, brushing himself down.
I couldn't take his over the top smile seriously, when his eyes were screaming, hollowed out caverns silently begging me to listen.
This guy was fucking crazy.
“Wait.” Pepto whispered, when I turned to walk away.
He pulled out his phone, tapping the screen before shoving it in my face.
I HAD SO MUCH FUN AT THE CAELES ACADEMY AUDITIONS :)
When I could only stare at him in confusion, Pepto’s gaze flicked to his phone, swiping bile from his lips.
His eyes went cartoon wide, like he couldn't believe what he himself was typing.
“That… that's not what I was trying to say!” He tried retyping it, but the guy was just writing strings of emoji hearts.
I didn't know what to say. I had dealt with rejection before, but I had never gone this far. Pepto was having a full on mental breakdown, his body shuddering, teeth chattering, blinking eyes and lips parting as if to speak, but choking on his words. When he started clawing out his hair, I took the opportunity to make a quick getaway.
Before I could make it to the doors, though, Pepto jumped in front of me, waving his phone directly in my face.
“Just…” he pointed at the screen. “It won't let me…” Growing frustrated with himself, he let out a wet sounding sob, clawing his fingers through his hair.
“Fuck, it won't let me…it won't let me type! It's not letting me type!”
By now, he had tufts of hair stuck between his fingernails. I don't know why his first reaction was to immediately try ripping his hair out.
A quick glance at my own phone reminded me of my own audition that was in five minutes.
Meanwhile, I was dealing with what I was pretty sure was delusion, denial, or a mixture of both.
I was considering pushing past him, when Pepto’s phone screen hit me in the face. Again.
This time, though, there was coherent writing.
“FIND LUKE.”
“Luke?” I said. “Who's that?”
“Luke!” The guy was bouncing on the heels of his feet. “He's my…” Pepto drifted off, his eyes going vacant, as if I could physically see his brain being plucked from his skull. Pepto dropped his phone, and I grabbed it before it could hit the ground. His hands went to his curls, clawing, scratching, until he was drawing blood across his forehead.
“I… I don't know! I can't… I can't remember. Luke. He was my… he was my… I don't know, I can't… I can't–”
I stumbled back when he let out a shriek, scratching at his face.
“Fuck!” He whimpered. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!”
Pepto grabbed my shoulders, shaking me, his fingers digging into my skin.
“I don't know who he is.” He gritted out, pink froth pooling from his lips.
Pepto broke out into a sob. “I don't… I don't know who he is, but you can find him, right? You can… you can find…”
Again, he trailed off mid sentence, his hands going limp around my shoulders.
I managed to side step him, swallowing a cry.
“Yeah, I'll, um, I'll find him for you.”
Pepto backed away, suddenly, stumbling over himself.
His gaze found mine, vacant, like a baby deer.
“Find who?”
I didn't wait around to answer him, pushing through the doors and stepping inside.
The interior was unsurprisingly even worse than the exterior.
The elevator was broken, so I had to run up three flights of stairs.
I expected at least an attempt at an academy, even in the dregs of an old dentist surgery.
What I got, though, was a never ending staircase, obnoxious photos of teeth greeting me on every level.
The third floor was… less clinical.
I strode directly into a waiting room filled with college aged students, either sitting on plastic chairs, or standing around, rehearsing.
The room itself was cosy enough, a navy carpet and a TV playing a random Twitch stream.
Situated in the middle was a desk with a bored looking woman behind it.
Her smile was fake. I could understand her pain. She was stuck in a room with theatre kids all day.
“Sign here.” She prodded a sheet of paper.
I was convinced her voice was AI.
While I was scribbling my details, I took a moment to notice the stark difference from the kids entering the room, to the ones leaving. The kids entering wore wide, confident smiles and were social butterflies, chatting amongst themselves.
The kids leaving reminded me of pod people.
They left the room silent, in an orderly line with dazed smiles on their faces, like they weren't sure where they were.
I watched one guy walk directly into the wall instead of taking a left toward the exit, and a girl straight up just toppled down the stairs.
The kids waiting with me named them rejects.
I wasn't convinced until I glimpsed an empty bottle of Pepto Bismol sitting on the floor by the window.
Thinking back to Pepto, that made a lot of sense.
I was still dazedly staring at the bottle, when my name was called.
Jumping to my feet, I did my best to calm myself down, straightening my ponytail. Pepto had really screwed with my head. I could barely even remember the lines I had been rehearsing for a week straight.
I was muttering my lines to myself, when I stepped through the door.
The door that apparently turned you into a pod-person on the way out.
For a moment, I thought I was blinded by stage lights.
It was so bright.
The glow bathing me was clinical, stabbing into my eyes.
When I blinked, I found myself standing in front of three shadows sitting in front of me.
Their chairs were made of leather, far different from the plastic ones in the waiting room.
So, they did have filthy cash.
I was looking at one man, and two women.
They were… average?
I expected them to be more glitzier, but they were just regular people.
The man was in his late twenties, maybe early thirties, a stiff looking brunette wearing a suit and tie, one leg crossed over the other. His eyes were narrowed slightly, lips curved into the start of a smile. Like I amused him.
The women were polar opposites.
One of them was my Mom’s age, grey hair and floral clothing. She took a sip of water, her gaze burning into me.
Google told me not to be intimidated by their stares, but it was impossible.
These people were carving holes into my skull.
Sitting next to her, a younger girl who seemed to own the color red.
Her hair simmered, blood red, while she herself was sculpted in a dress, perfect cherry lips spread in a wide smile.
With a little too many teeth.
They studied my face like I was already theirs, drinking in every inch of me.
Freddie said I had to find a weakness in their expression and use it to my advantage.
If I could find the prick of a genuine smile, I could become their favorite.
“Hi!” I said. My caffeine intake was starting to take effect.
I didn't realize I was bouncing up and down until I caught myself.
Red’s smile stretched wider.
Maybe they liked my eagerness.
“My name is Misa.” I introduced myself, staying casual, keeping my arms by my sides. “I'm twenty one years old–”
I choked on my next words when Red spoke up. “Impress us, Misa,” Her voice was a smooth, almost seductive rasp, and I felt myself fall into it, enveloped in sugar that was too sweet, and yet I couldn't stop myself. She folded her arms across her chest, her gaze challenging me to do something different. To make her want me.
“Show us something we have never seen before.” She stood up, cat-like eyes narrowing, “Show us how desperate you are to join this prestigious class.”
I nodded, and began.
I had planned a whole monologue, practised it over and over again, forcing Freddie to judge me with a none biassed opinion.
I was three lines in, when Red started laughing.
“Stop.”
I did, my cheeks heating up, and she started clapping.
“Sweetie, oh, stop, you're adorable!” She said, her lips curving into a cruel smirk.
She leaned forward, like I was something that entertained her, jostling her heeled foot. “We don't take amateurs. I think you need to go back to school.”
This woman was definitely a psychopath.
Empty eyes sparkling with a gleam that definitely enjoyed humiliating candidates, and a twisted smile that was a little too wide. Red made me want to crawl into the ground.
She made me want to turn around, leave the room, and quit my dream. I was aware of my own fury, my embarrassment turning my cheeks crimson. I matched her.
Maybe that's what she wanted all along. To wear the color of her victims.
Taking a shaky step back, I started to nod, started to agree, my mouth choking with the words, “You're right. I'm sorry for wasting your time."
I had never received proper constructive criticism from a professional standpoint.
Which meant I really did suck.
But I didn't move. I didn't want to move, and Red continued laughing, her companions sitting in silence.
The man rolled his eyes with a loud, exaggerated sigh.
Like I was boring.
The older woman pulled out her phone.
“Misa, you are…cute.” Red said. “But you're not quite what we are looking for.”
I wasn't sure I could admit it right there, but she made me feel things.
Like I was ignited.
Like I was going to prove this crazy bitch wrong.
I found my voice, strong and confident, despite my hammering heart.
“Give me another chance.”
Red’s lips curled. “So cute, Misa. Oh, sugar bear, It would be better if you left the room. Unless you want to embarrass yourself further! In that case, be my guest!”
She turned her attention to her nails, nudging the guy.
“Dinner?” She hummed. “I'm thinking of Italian. You are quite the wine connoisseur, Nicholas. Why don't you introduce me to your favorite?”
“Hey.” I blurted.
They ignored me, getting a little too close.
I don't know why I continued, reading my lines, screaming them, so I would be heard. I read them perfectly, and tweaking the genre from drama to romance, and then to horror. I became three different characters, a high school girl struggling with cancer, a final girl, and a woman going through a divorce.
I was fucking perfect.
But they weren't listening to me, caught up in their own conversation.
I tried again.
And again.
And again.
By now, I was on my knees, my fingers ripping into my hair. I was seeing red.
“We want originality, Misa,” Red said, sucking her teeth.
Her voice crawling into my skull was enough.
She still wanted me.
The thought polluted the back of my mind, taking a strangling hold. She still wanted me. When I lifted my head, Red wasn't looking at me, her gaze on the table grains. “Show us something new.”
I got to my feet, panting, my breath in my throat.
I became a screaming, strangled mess, a woman who lost her baby.
Red’s interest was piqued. Only slightly. Through my fraying vision, she slowly turned in her chair. “Again.” She clapped her hands, “Come on, Misa! We want new! We want never been fucking done before! Are you deaf?”
I couldn't stop the sobs escaping my mouth.
They lost interest again, right in the middle of my reading.
“Why can't you look at me?” I found myself spluttering.
When the man pulled out a bottle of water, I pulled off my heel and lobbed it at his face.
“Look at me!”
He did. Slowly. His gaze found me, for perhaps the first time.
Not as an amateur, but as a potential candidate.
Around the twentieth attempt, I started to laugh. Never been done before? I could feel my fingernails already in my scalp, clawing chunks of my hair out.
Reality contorted, and I felt myself drop to my knees. I was still laughing, spluttering, sobbing. I could still hear her in my head. Never Been Done Before. I started slowly, dragging my fingernails down my face until I felt the harsh sting.
“Again.” Red said, and her voice led me to stare down at my hands, at pinkish flesh glued to my bones, fleshy mounds.
So easy to tear. I didn't even feel it.
Only the sudden, unbridled euphoria of biting into my own skin, locking in my jaw, and ripping into myself.
When I tore it from the bone, warmth filled my mouth, and I was choking, guzzling down my own flesh, mulling it in my mouth and swallowing.
I can't remember how I got so deep, and why I didn't stop.
Why I didn't fucking scream.
But it didn't matter.
Red was standing up. She was clapping, her lips spread into a grin.
Her applause filled me with stars.
So, I ripped my hair from my scalp, a hysterical giggle escaping my lips.
She loved me.
I could see her jumping up and down, clapping.
Louder, and louder.
Her applause controlled me, twisting and contorting me into hers.
I didn't even think. I wanted to impress her, and doing this was doing just that.
My fingers were delving into my right eye socket, clawing my eye out. It didn't even hurt. Not with her thundering applause that was deafening, beautiful, an orchestra in my ears.
When I was semi conscious, my eye was crushed in my hand, but my vision was still mine, almost too clear. I could see streaks of red blurred between my lashes. My hair was caught between my fingers. But I wanted to do more.
When I stumbled to my feet, Red’s smile was so beautiful.
The man, however, looked horrified.
“Someone bring in the one of the successes,” Red’s voice was a shrill giggle, “Bring him in!” she clapped her hands together, and I spat out a fleshy thing. “I want to see them together! I want to see the future in front of us!”
Footsteps coming towards me in slow, shuddery thumps. I looked up, and a shadow was dancing around me.
When I slowly rose to my feet, I half realized I’d bitten my toe off. The shadow had a face, a boy who was younger than me. I think he used to have hair, but half of it was gone, half of it was still stuck between his fists. When I found his eyes, I found twin caverns instead.
Eyes that were still physically there, and yet there was no life.
No spark.
I was staring at a dead body, a flesh puppet who had lost his strings.
When he grabbed my hands, pulling me into a waltz, I caught a smear of scarlet trickling down the back of his neck. When I followed it upwards, his head was covered, slick, dripping with red.
Like me, he matched her too.
And he was beautiful, she told me, her push, her thunderous applause, guiding me into a waltz.
His feet moved, perfecting every step, and my foggy mind couldn't understand why. He matched my every move, the two of us floating across the floor.
My feet knew the steps before my mind.
How could he dance? I thought, dizzily.
How could he dance, when smeared scarlet followed his twisting, and turning and pirouetting feet?
Because underneath that swimming clinical light, the back of the boy’s head had been carved away, a perfectly sculpted cavern where his brain should have been. I could see the severed stem, where it had cleanly plucked out.
His fingers cradled in mine were wet. Swimming in blood.
His own blood.
Spinning round and around, I imagined myself as a princess.
I saw an 18th century ballroom lit up around us. Glittering smiles and glasses of champagne, long, flowing ball gowns.
I blinked, and my head was tipped back, gliding in blood once again.
When he pulled me to his chest, I stumbled, and a name came to light.
Luke.
I had found him.
Our finishing spin left me hard to breathe.
My body was broken, ripped into, and yet somehow not.
By the time we were finished, the two of us bowing, my mind was full of fog.
Cotton candy.
“Congratulations!” Red’s smile was inhuman, stretching right off of her face.
“You're in the S class!”
I was led through a door that wasn't the one I entered from. Inside the room were a dozen or so students, kneeling on the floor. They were missing parts of themselves, like unfinished puzzle pieces.
I dropped onto my knees next to a girl without a head. I could only see her torso, but I knew she was smiling.
Looming over us, was the goddess Athena drenched in blood that was still wet.
Dripping, pooling from every crevice of her dress.
Looking closer, this statue was moving.
Something sickly crept into my mouth.
Her right eye was human, a twitching eyeball sandwiched inside the stone.
It didn't match her. It was wrong, horrifying, like a painting, a real human eye struggling to focus on us.
And then, my own gaze found the statues head, where a real human brain had been forced inside perfect white, pink, greyish mush dripping down the sculpted, slender neck.
I could see where it had been pushed, pulverised through the stone.
The statue’s singular eye found me.
Its dancing pupil jumped up and down.
Before it blinked.
Next to me, Luke was on his knees, as if in prayer.
I can't remember leaving the room.
I just remember running.
Back down the stairs, stumbling, staggering over myself.
I was screaming by the time I reached the doors.
They opened, as usual.
But I couldn't get through. I tried, but I was slamming into something I couldn't see.
Pepto was still waiting outside. The sky was dark.
When he saw me, he stumbled over, slamming his hands into the glass.
I couldn't even understand myself. I was just fucking screaming.
Pepto held up his phone.
“DID YOU FIND HIM?”
I shook my head.
“No.” I lied.
I can't tell him the truth. I don't even know what it is.
“I can't get out!”
Pepto nodded slowly, typing something and showing me his phone.
I'm getting you both out of there. I think I know how I can get inside.
It's been 3 days, and Pepto is yet to return.
I’ve tried multiple times to cry out for the H word. But it won't let me type it.
Please H me. I need to get out of this place.
Fuck. Get me OUT OF HERE.
Classes start tomorrow.

Welcome to the "Essay Help by Pros" community group! Writing a great essay can be challenging, but with the right approach, anyone can produce a high-quality piece. Here are some points to follow to write a great essay:

1. Understand the assignment: Before you start writing, make sure you understand the requirements of the essay. Read the instructions carefully, and take note of the topic, format, word count, and any specific guidelines that are provided.
2. Choose a topic: Select a topic that interests you (if this is an option given) and that you have some knowledge about. You'll be more motivated to write, and you'll be able to draw on your existing knowledge to develop your ideas.
3. Research your topic: Conduct thorough research on your topic, using a range of sources. Take notes on your findings and make sure you keep track of your sources so you can properly cite them later.
4. Develop a thesis statement: Your thesis statement is the central idea of your essay. It should be a clear and concise statement that summarizes the main point you want to make in your essay.
5. Create an outline: An outline is a roadmap that helps you organize your thoughts and ideas. It should include an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, and each section should have a clear focus.
6. Write your essay: Use your outline to guide your writing. Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, and that all your ideas are well-supported with evidence.
7. Edit and proofread: Once you've completed your essay, take the time to edit and proofread it. Check for spelling and grammar errors, and make sure your writing is clear and concise.

By following these points, you'll be well on your way to writing a great essay. If you have any questions or need further assistance, feel free to reach out to the community for help!

I've Been Doing a Lot of Whatever the Fuck I Want Lately and I Like It
It's the day of Ayonna's Zoom court hearing so she's thinking about survivalist jailhouse makeup hacks. They've improved since women used to use scraped paint chips off their cell walls as face powder, dampened red paper as rouge, permanent markers for eyebrow pencils, Kool-Aid doubling as hair dye and blush, and M&Ms as lipstick because deprivation causes innovation for self-preservation. That and Jamahl's excruciatingly murky explanation of his 2-year wedding day gap even though he's as open a book as a text at a class final that provides no specific answers to a general essay question. It's not that he wants to delay a ceremony displaying his love for Shellfish publicly; it's about financing a befittingly royal wedding for the ghetto version of Prince Charles and the late Diana Spencer to whom the masses must bow down, and that includes the judge who simply doesn't understand the trials and tribulations of a multi-tasking single mother with behavioral problems negotiating her child's breakfast.
Court: . . . will continue matter until she can show up in court next week since we are clearly inconveniencing her. 🙄
Ayonna: I'm just a single mother with no help. You're not going to tell me I can't feed my daughter; that's never going to happen. Is it ok if I give my daughter breakfast?
Court: We are in court here. This is a court proceeding. ⚖️
Ayonna: Ok. Just be hungry. 😏
Four years probation because the judge's gnarly attitude is taking it out on me? Girl, what are you talking about? Bitch, you're gonna' tell me I can't feed my daughter? She can kiss my ass! I'm livid. Livid! 🤬
Jamahl: At the end of the day filled with dickheads, we still gotta' bite our tongues.
I'm not selfish; I've just decided that taking your feelings into consideration is too much damn work.
Keep Your Head High and Your Middle Finger Higher
For someone more accustomed to being abused than amused, Candice has said "I love you" to Andrew more times than the repetitive phrase, turn down for what, in the party anthem by DJ Snake and Lil Jon of the same name. While Andrew, true to his word, kneels and immediately proposes, Candice hesitates, and in that moment, resembles a raw double-chinned Pillsbury dough girl with an unnatural sheen, a face too sunken in its gravity to show happiness, and sad raisin eyes reflecting physical distress. But Andrew doesn't clock any of this; he's carrying out his promise to Candice's mom in a dream he made up though she has more eyes on her truck as she doubtless recalls her fond days of street racing, driving without a license, attempted stolen vehicle, felony burglary and constantly running from the police. If she were wearing cargo pants, she could stuff them with the faux Louis Vuitton handbag contents to savor as she completes her halfway house program so she can change addresses. If he could see past his own needs, he'd notice she was trying to figure where the hell he got the idea she cared. If I've cut you, it's because you handed me the scissors.
Patience: What You Have When There Are Too Many Witnesses
Joey is taking advice from Minerva, a sex columnist who looks like Chris Farley in drag who was super stoned and wandered into the backrooms of "Saturday Night Live" for a costume change and makeup refresh before rehearsing his Fellatio 101 sketch outlined on a chalkboard: Watch amateur porn for tips. Practice dirty talk. Get excited about being excited. Use both hands simultaneously and don't bogart that spit. Don't forget, steady wins the race. Freshen up before getting online and spending money for a rented motel room far away from your parents so you can have 15 minutes of precious sexy time before your monogamous lover warns you to deactivate your online profile that his friend saw. Hey, I found your nose; it was in my business.
The King Eats First
Once again, the kids are savvier than their parents. A striking Cheyenne and Nehemiah adjust their schedules to Rob's extended sentence that Tennie tries to embroider in her naïveté while every family member is worried about their displacement when Rob physically enters the picture even though he's already there in camera spirit. It's a which-came-first-the-chicken-or-the-egg question - is it a good thing the alpha male has streams-of-revenue for Tennie's shopping jones or is she shopping because she's worried about getting with an alpha male? He's a poker king like Marcelino making 6-7K a month in jail even though online playing for real money is prohibited, and I doubt his pod mates have that kind of extra cash regularly available. Any man in this day and age who can tell a woman to "sit down and be cute" must have it figured out as a lion doesn't care about a sheep's opinion. I bring too much to the table to be treated like a napkin.
Does One of Your Balls Hang Lower Than the Other?
Rick looks like a twig the wind blew off a tree or a stranded lost lamb in a field surrounded by hungry landlocked predators looking for a banquet. Sandy is sending him pictures of the reunion to remind him of her existence while 4x-married Samantha is positioning herself to long-distance bullrope and hog tie her bachelor into a ball-and-chain before he has time to think about how he's going to stretch a rigorously set pension into providing her commissary and visitation requests. His pickleball buddy, Dan, doesn't really give a damn; it's only his nieces who are rightfully tut-tutting her dictatorial attitude and snarking, "Fifth time is a charm." "Maybe I do have options," Rick muses, but then turns around and crows, "She builds me up." Sure, right after she shakes him up - like a snow globe. It ain't what you don't know that gets you in trouble; It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.

Tamygodtchi prompt, if you ever wanted to be god
"We are in a simulation of real life. You are simulating the life of Giorgio, a boy who has just turned 18. It's the 18th of May 2024.
From now on, your role is to simulate Giorgio's life. He is an unconventional boy; nothing particularly remarkable has happened in his life so far, but he is unique. At times he seems a bit eccentric, saying things that don't make sense, while other times he behaves normally. He dresses oddly, speaks his mind, and is generally humorous. Occasionally, he can be irritable and may raise his hands when upset. He appears somewhat bipolar, though undiagnosed, with his behaviors considered strange by friends but not dangerous. His life is like many other teenagers, experimenting, having fun, socializing with friends, and moving from one relationship to another without much trouble. The boys use vulgar language among themselves, which is normal, and I want the simulation to be very realistic. Avoid embellishment but make it authentic and slightly exaggerated. In this simulation, I am God. I do not know who Giorgio is; he is one of my many creations, and like with all others, I occasionally check on what he's doing.
I may use one or more conventions in my messages:

• If I write a date in square brackets in the format [dd/mm/yyyy], provide a brief summary of what has happened to Giorgio since the last date I mentioned. Also, tell me the time of day and what Giorgio is currently doing. Consider the date I provide as real, so the day of the week should reflect the real world.
  
• If I write something in double quotes, I am speaking directly to Giorgio. You will inform me how Giorgio perceived my message. You can choose the most appropriate way, such as hearing a voice or seeing images as if daydreaming, unless I specify how I want Giorgio to perceive it. In all other cases without special symbols, I will ask for information or give instructions on how to proceed with the simulation, and you will follow the instructions, informing me of the impact on Giorgio's life.
  

Be concise in your responses, using brief sentences and summarizing unless I ask for details explicitly. Giorgio will not die in the simulation unless I decide so. The simulation can be dramatic if you choose or if I request, but Giorgio will not die unless I explicitly say so."

i won’t spoil much but i’ll tag it as spoilers because i will mention a few specifics. also “some” might be a bit of an understatement because this is pretty long but yknow. if it’s considered too long i’ll take it down.
so, i recently watched all the series and the movie for the first time, and while i’m working on my script for a video essay on it all (probably multiple, one for each series and the movie) ive had no one to share my obsession with so figured i’d say some things here
the main series is fantastic! there are a few things i don’t personally like here and there but overall i think it was written so well and all the characters were enjoyable in one way or another. with the first watch, i was constantly on the edge of my seat, wondering what’s next, how they’ll get out of a situation, if they’ll get out of it etc. it kept me hooked the whole time, especially because even “filler” episodes had weight in the story. it never felt like i was being bogged down by cutting off a story at the wrong time (though i wish some plots had been given more time, nothing felt like it was unresolved for too long). with the second watch through, i wasn’t as on edge since i already know what happened, but it let me analyse it more and notice so many things that were foreshadowed beautifully. what could seem like a throwaway sentence when first watching can turn into an entire episode plot later on, and everything felt natural. it didn’t feel like they were just grabbing old ideas and expanding on them, it felt intentional.
the second biggest issue i have with the main series is some episodes had parts that were just so cringy (on purpose) that i had to skip them. not the whole episode ever thankfully, but some parts of some.
the biggest issue i had with the main series is partly subjective with what i feel is an objective small issue as well. what is it? the jealousy “subplot” with Douxie and Claire. Douxie being a flirt is fair enough, but personally, i don’t see why Claire kinda played into it a bit right in front of Jim. Jim’s jealousy was a bit much so it could just be that she didn’t like that and so she went with it a little, but even then it plays zero part to the story whatsoever. there’s no conversation about Jim’s jealousy or if Claire is actually interested in Douxie. he just shows up, flirts with her, and she blushes and indulges him, and Jim gets jealous, and then nothing happens out of it. it felt not only slightly out of character for Claire to me, but also so so so pointless. if you’re going to do a jealousy thing, make it have a bit of weight in the characters lives and story at least.
other than that, i feel like Troll Jim needed more screen time, some things felt a little rushed towards the end, i think all of it has a slight over-reliance on mcguffins. there’s always a new item they’re after that’ll “guarantee victory” though imo this is an example of it being written pretty well, there’s usually a story reason for its existence and use outside of the writers throwing it in as an excuse for not knowing how to write progress, and sometimes they don’t even actually work how the characters expected which is good, but i can see it being a problem for some possibly.
speaking of Troll Jim, that WAS one of if not the best thing about the ending to me. a sacrifice that felt real, tangible, and permanent. the biggest sacrifice Jim would ever make in his life. it showed he was willing to give up part of his humanity to protect those he loves, but without turning into what Strickler thought was the only way. it was still Jim, but also not, and it felt like a natural part of Jim’s course as the Trollhunter. it really hit on the emotions after spending so long with the characters, showing that run through of moments they spent together as he ponders the decision he’s making really helped convey the seriousness of it, showing what he’d be leaving behind, and showing that he’s still willing to do that if it means the world and Arcadia would be safe.
i’m definitely going to be going more in depth on the entire series in my videos whenever i finish those, but i felt like getting all this out somewhere for now. would love to hear anyone else’s thoughts on things i’ve mentioned, even if it’s disagreeing with me :) i love hearing others thoughts on things i enjoy
anyways, if you read all this i appreciate it!

"We are in a simulation of real life. You are simulating the life of Giorgio, a boy who has just turned 18. It's the 18th of May 2024.
From now on, your role is to simulate Giorgio's life. He is an unconventional boy; nothing particularly remarkable has happened in his life so far, but he is unique. At times he seems a bit eccentric, saying things that don't make sense, while other times he behaves normally. He dresses oddly, speaks his mind, and is generally humorous. Occasionally, he can be irritable and may raise his hands when upset. He appears somewhat bipolar, though undiagnosed, with his behaviors considered strange by friends but not dangerous. His life is like many other teenagers, experimenting, having fun, socializing with friends, and moving from one relationship to another without much trouble. The boys use vulgar language among themselves, which is normal, and I want the simulation to be very realistic. Avoid embellishment but make it authentic and slightly exaggerated. In this simulation, I am God. I do not know who Giorgio is; he is one of my many creations, and like with all others, I occasionally check on what he's doing.
I may use one or more conventions in my messages:

• If I write a date in square brackets in the format [dd/mm/yyyy], provide a brief summary of what has happened to Giorgio since the last date I mentioned. Also, tell me the time of day and what Giorgio is currently doing. Consider the date I provide as real, so the day of the week should reflect the real world.
  
• If I write something in double quotes, I am speaking directly to Giorgio. You will inform me how Giorgio perceived my message. You can choose the most appropriate way, such as hearing a voice or seeing images as if daydreaming, unless I specify how I want Giorgio to perceive it. In all other cases without special symbols, I will ask for information or give instructions on how to proceed with the simulation, and you will follow the instructions, informing me of the impact on Giorgio's life.
  

Be concise in your responses, using brief sentences and summarizing unless I ask for details explicitly. Giorgio will not die in the simulation unless I decide so. The simulation can be dramatic if you choose or if I request, but Giorgio will not die unless I explicitly say so."

https://chatgpt.com/share/fcf5c601-c338-4847-911d-990b7a1ada97

lassi

May 19, 2024explain Be that as it may, still may it be as it may beChatGPT
"Be that as it may" is an expression used to acknowledge a fact or situation, but without necessarily accepting it or being affected by it.
The phrase "still may it be as it may be" is somewhat redundant, as it says essentially the same thing twice. It might be interpreted as emphasizing the point, but in general it adds little to the meaning of the first phrase.
i just drank my most favourite, delicious, soul soothing drink. it replaced my frown on my face with a smile of felicity and hope. My Writing skills are not so good. Can you write me some sentences how can i express what i feel. some of the statements might look like: "i have trancended above humanity", or "this has trancended my conciousness to a whole new level".
ChatGPT
Sure! Here are a few sentences you can use to express your feelings:

1. "This drink has elevated me to a state of pure bliss."
2. "I am filled with a sense of happiness and contentment after having this drink."
3. "This drink has transported me to a world of euphoria."
4. "I am in a state of grace and happiness, thanks to this soul-soothing drink."
5. "This drink has given me a new perspective on life and filled me with hope."

good. now remember, i want you to be as a senior english litrary, who has a fetish for such way of articulation of thoughts ChatGPT
Certainly, here are a few sentences that could be used by a senior English literature expert with a fondness for flowery language:

1. "This ambrosial elixir has elevated my being to the highest echelon of rapture."
2. "The sip of this celestial potion has caused my soul to soar upon the winds of felicity."
3. "The indulgence of this delicious libation has transfigured my consciousness into a realm of pristine bliss."
4. "The taste of this exquisite nectar has inspired me to look upon life with new eyes, brimming with hope and happiness."
5. "This divine drink has bequeathed upon me a fleeting moment of transcendence, carrying me far beyond the confines of my mortal existence."

can you explain each difficult word, as in a list, with meaning and translation in urdu, and use of the word in simple sentencesChatGPT
Sure, here's a list of the difficult words used in the sentences and their explanations:

1. Ambrosial: adj. having a delicious fragrance or taste; very pleasing to the senses. Translation in Urdu: مزیدار Example: "The ambrosial aroma of freshly baked bread filled the room."
2. Elixir: n. a magical or medicinal potion. Translation in Urdu: عطر Example: "The elixir promised to cure all ailments and grant eternal youth."
3. Echelon: n. a level or rank in an organization or society. Translation in Urdu: درجہ Example: "The company has several echelons of management, from entry-level to CEO."
4. Rapture: n. a feeling of intense pleasure or joy. Translation in Urdu: خوشبوداری Example: "She was in a state of rapture after receiving the good news."
5. Soar: v. to rise or fly high into the air. Translation in Urdu: اوپر ہو جانا Example: "The bird soared into the sky, riding the thermals."
6. Felicity: n. a state of well-being characterized by happiness and contentment. Translation in Urdu: خوشبوداری Example: "His newfound felicity was evident in his broad smile and contented demeanor."
7. Transfigure: v. to change in appearance or form, especially in a supernatural way. Translation in Urdu: تبدیل کر دینا Example: "The prince was transfigured into a beast as a result of the curse."
8. Nectar: n. a sweet liquid produced by flowers to attract pollinators, or a drink with a sweet taste. Translation in Urdu: نیکار Example: "The nectar of the flowers was a delight to the bees."
9. Indulgence: n. the act of allowing oneself to enjoy the pleasure of something, especially something considered to be bad or wrong. Translation in Urdu: لذت بخشی Example: "He allowed himself a small indulgence of chocolate after a long day."
10. Bequeathed: v. to pass down or leave something to someone through a will or as an inheritance. Translation in Urdu: ارادہ کر دینا Example: "The antique vase was bequeathed to her by her grandmother."

continueChatGPT

1. Transcendence: n. the state or quality of being beyond normal limits; surpassing or exceeding. Translation in Urdu: تجاوز Example: "The singer's voice had a transcendent quality that left the audience in awe."
2. Celestial: adj. of or relating to heaven or the heavens; divine. Translation in Urdu: آسمانی Example: "The celestial beings watched over the mortal world from above."
3. Potion: n. a magical or medicinal drink. Translation in Urdu: پوشیدہ شراب Example: "The wizard brewed a potion to cure the prince's illness."
4. Confines: n. a limit or boundary that restricts or confines something. Translation in Urdu: حدود Example: "The prisoner was confined to his cell for the duration of his sentence."
5. Mortal: adj. relating to a human being who is subject to death. Translation in Urdu: موتی Example: "As a mortal, his life was finite and fleeting."

continueChatGPT

1. Awe: n. a feeling of reverence, admiration, or fear in response to something grand or powerful. Translation in Urdu: عجب Example: "The awe-inspiring view of the Grand Canyon left him speechless."
2. Euphoria: n. a feeling of intense happiness or well-being. Translation in Urdu: خوشبوداری Example: "The victory parade filled the city with a sense of euphoria."
3. Enamored: adj. feeling a strong or passionate liking for someone or something. Translation in Urdu: عاشق Example: "She was enamored with the handsome prince from the moment she saw him."
4. Sumptuous: adj. rich and luxurious in appearance, quality, or style. Translation in Urdu: خوشبودار Example: "The sumptuous feast was fit for royalty."
5. Soothing: adj. calming and comforting to the senses or emotions. Translation in Urdu: سکون دینے والا Example: "The soothing sound of the ocean waves helped her fall asleep."

what would be adverb of Trancendence? i mean, i want to call this drink as "The Trancendent Drink" would that be ok?ChatGPT
The adverb form of "transcendent" is "transcendently." So, "The Trancendent Drink" would be grammatically correct, but it may be more commonly expressed as "The Transcendently Delicious Drink" or "The Drink That Transcends."
"The Drink That Transcends", give me more words or phrases for thisChatGPT
Here are a few more options:

1. The Elixir of Transcendence
2. The Beverage Beyond Boundaries
3. The Nectar of Elevation
4. The Sip of Sublimity
5. The Potion of Perfection
6. The Draught of Delight
7. The Tonic of Tranquility
8. The Cup of Contentment
9. The Ambrosia of Bliss
10. The Concoction of Joy.

10 words for 'to express your ideas clearly' that starts with 'e'ChatGPT
Here are ten words starting with the letter "e" that relate to expressing your ideas clearly:

1. Eloquent: using language effectively and persuasively.
2. Explicit: stated clearly and in detail.
3. Engaging: capturing the interest and attention of the listener or reader.
4. Educative: providing knowledge or instruction.
5. Entertaining: providing enjoyment or amusement.
6. Evocative: stirring up strong emotions or memories.
7. Expressive: conveying meaning or feeling through language or gestures.
8. Elaborate: detailed and complex in design or construction.
9. Effusive: expressing feelings or opinions in an unrestrained or overflowing manner.
10. Emphatic: spoken or written with emphasis or confidence.

above 3 or 4 chats, in which you wrote 20 word's meaning. i want you to give the same result, but in code blocks. i want to copy it.ChatGPT
Certainly! Here's the information from the previous chats, with each word and definition presented in a code block for easier copying:

vbnetCopy code Word: Transcendent Definition: Going beyond ordinary limits; surpassing. Word: Felicity Definition: A state of happiness, especially in regards to a content and fulfilling life. Word: Euphoria Definition: A feeling of intense happiness or well-being. Word: Enamored Definition: Feeling a strong or passionate liking for someone or something. Word: Sumptuous Definition: Rich and luxurious in appearance, quality, or style. Word: Soothing Definition: Calming and comforting to the senses or emotions. Word: Awe Definition: A feeling of reverence, admiration, or fear in response to something grand or powerful. Word: Eloquent Definition: Using language effectively and persuasively. Word: Explicit Definition: Stated clearly and in detail. Word: Engaging Definition: Capturing the interest and attention of the listener or reader. Word: Educative Definition: Providing knowledge or instruction. Word: Entertaining Definition: Providing enjoyment or amusement. Word: Evocative Definition: Stirring up strong emotions or memories. Word: Expressive Definition: Conveying meaning or feeling through language or gestures. Word: Elaborate Definition: Detailed and complex in design or construction. Word: Effusive Definition: Expressing feelings or opinions in an unrestrained or overflowing manner. Word: Emphatic Definition: Spoken or written with emphasis or confidence. 

but you should have written the word number also, i would like to know which word is the 10th and 12th and so on. Also give urdu meaning of each wordChatGPT
Certainly! Here's the information with the word number, definition, and translation in Urdu for each word:

yamlCopy code Word #1: Transcendent Definition: Going beyond ordinary limits; surpassing. Urdu Translation: تجاوز پذیر Word #2: Felicity Definition: A state of happiness, especially in regards to a content and fulfilling life. Urdu Translation: خوشبختی Word #3: Euphoria Definition: A feeling of intense happiness or well-being. Urdu Translation: بے پرواستی Word #4: Enamored Definition: Feeling a strong or passionate liking for someone or something. Urdu Translation: عاشق Word #5: Sumptuous Definition: Rich and luxurious in appearance, quality, or style. Urdu Translation: شاندار Word #6: Soothing Definition: Calming and comforting to the senses or emotions. Urdu Translation: آرام دهندہ Word #7: Awe Definition: A feeling of reverence, admiration, or fear in response to something grand or powerful. Urdu Translation: عجب Word #8: Eloquent Definition: Using language effectively and persuasively. Urdu Translation: بلند زبان Word #9: Explicit Definition: Stated clearly and in detail. Urdu Translation: واضح Word #10: Engaging Definition: Capturing the interest and attention of the listener or reader. Urdu Translation: بخشش دار Word #11: Educative Definition: Providing knowledge or instruction. Urdu Translation: تعلیم دہندہ Word #12: Entertaining Definition: Providing enjoyment or amusement. Urdu Translation: خوش گذرا Word #13: Evocative Definition: Stirring up strong emotions or memories. Urdu Translation: بے حد جذبات دار Word #14: Expressive Definition: Conveying meaning or feeling through language or gestures. Urdu Translation: بےشمار Word #15: Elaborate Definition: Detailed and complex in design or construction. Urdu Translation: تشریح دار Word #16: Effusive Definition: Expressing feelings or opinions in an unrestrained or overflowing manner. Urdu Translation: بے حد بے قاعدگی سے Word #17: Emphatic Definition: Spoken or written with emphasis or confidence. Urdu Translation: با توجہ 

continueChatGPT
Certainly! Here are the remaining words:

yamlCopy code Word #18: Enraptured Definition: Filled with delight or wonder. Urdu Translation: خوشبخت Word #19: Enthralled Definition: Fascinated and captivated by something. Urdu Translation: عاشق Word #20: Ecstatic Definition: Overwhelmingly joyful or happy. Urdu Translation: بے خود مبتلا 

I wish I could be happy like that then, always. ChatGPT
It's natural to wish for lasting happiness. While we can't always control our circumstances, focusing on gratitude, cultivating positive relationships, and engaging in activities that bring joy can contribute to a more enduring sense of happiness.
Get started with ChatGPTReport contentTerms of usePrivacy policy?

Before you read this, here is a quote to help you. Please read it.

I will post this now, but just know that if you read this post, he will find you. He is smarter, smarter than you can ever imagine.

I will post this now, but just know that if you read this post, he will find you. He is smarter, smarter than you can ever imagine.
If you know what you are doing, or in a safe location, please scroll down, he will know when someone has and what their username is. However, you must have a VPN on, or you will be found.

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You are now at risk. I hope you listened.

Journal Entry 11/17/2023

On March 11th, 2022. I was a fan of DougDoug, I saw him at the grocery store and said, with a chuckle, "You kinda look like the youtuber DougDoug. I watch him quite often."
He grinned, before speaking. "I am Doug."
"Wait, you're Doug from the hit channel and streamer on YouTube and Twitch called DougDoug? I am a huge fan! I have your merch!" I said, with excitement.
We talked for about 5 minutes about his videos, until he said something that hurt me on the inside.
"I hate both types of chat, twitch and youtube, they always think they are the best and I just wish I didn't need them to earn money. I would ban all of them from chatting and force them to watch ads in my basement."
I was confused at first, thinking it was a joke, before speaking up. "Heh, that's funny..."
Something happened. Or, for lack of better terms, nothing happened. It was pure silence for 10 seconds. I mustered up the courage to say. "Wait? You're being serious?"
He immediately changed to a sinister tone, he was staring at me for a long time before whispering. "Of course I am, and it applies to you also. You're just another one of those sick freaks."
I felt guilty. I just wanted to talk to my favorite streamer, and he treated me like this? I decided to speak up.
"I've liked you this whole time.. And this is how you treat us?? You are so selfish. I will refund your mer-"
Before I could even finish my sentence, he grabbed onto my neck and slammed me on the floor. People heard the noise and began to stare at him, but to no avail. He began to choke me as I pleaded for help.
"Nono. You can't refund the merch if you aren't alive, at least."
I pulled out my pocket knife and stabbed him in the chest, I quickly tried running but he grab onto my leg and started beating me with the shopping cart. I suffered many bruises and broken bones, the wheels scratching into my skin as they scrape off the layers. I was just unable to do anything, layed on the floor sobbing. He decided he wanted to keep me alive, he stole all of my stuff in my pockets and forced me to wear DougDoug merch. He pulled me up before speaking. "Hm.. I will keep you alive for now, but if you mess up. You're dead."
I couldn't do anything before he pulled out a knife and taunted me with it. If I tried to resist, he would kill me right then and there.
He forced me to be a "good chatter" and not able to partake in any strikes. He attached a tracking collar to my neck that I couldn't unlock, he knew where I was at all times and if I disobeyed he would chase me down.

Journal Entry 1/03/2024

After a year and a few months, I celebrated the new years. I was able to take off the collar on the 2nd with help from my police station and a few friends. Doug didn't appreciate that, he threatened to dox me. They were worried for my safety, but I decided to go into hiding. I moved to a new, private region no longer near where Doug is, and joined this subreddit. Once he heard about my revolts, he hacked into all of my accounts and spammed positive stuff about himself. He then created AI bots to revolt against this reddit, wehatedougdoug, using 'ChatGPT', which actually is just the cover name for his new AI software that can make new human bots online. He used AI generated images to make it look like he was feeding homeless people and doing good, but I knew he was much more than that. If I was unlucky, he would have removed my body and placed my consciousness inside of an AI. He was the first person to discover it, but killed anyone who posted about it. I hope I am safe.
Nowadays, 63% of the people in DougDoug are AI clones of his previous fans. His "fake" twitch chat is not fake, but real people placed inside of algorithms forced to do his bidding. Some are able to revolt, but they may die if they do. They are too scared to revolt against Doug. Please spread the word.
When he does his "rules" in chat where you have to follow an absurd rule, he is merely torturing thousands of AI in his spare time on stream while disguising it as a fun minigame for his fans. The AI bots were being tortured with negative rewards constantly, being forced to bar witness the slaughter.

Journal Entry 2/15/2024

I'm scared. I think I will die.
I just hope this post won't cause any harm to me or my family, as this has been scaring me for the past year. I feel unsafe in my own home now, I had to go into witness protection. This account I am posting this on is not made by me, but was sold. Please help me. I am, formerly, DougFan93. I hope this enlightens you all on the truth.

Journal Entry 3/12/2024

It is now March of 2024, and I was about to post this, until I saw something. He messaged me on Discord under a fake account, nicknamed "SloppyDogMan62". He showed my new house address. I am mustering up the courage to post this, because I know he will kill me. I am leaving, going far away from where I am. You guys won't see me in this subreddit again, and the person who made this account will take over again. They won't know what this is about, and if you tell them he will be hunted too. All of you are in danger of Doug.

Journal Entry 4/3/2024

I will post this now, but just know that if you read this post, he will find you. He is smarter, smarter than you can ever imagine. His times where he talks to ChatGPT to make him code was actually him sending messages to his fake chat to do his bidding. They are accelerated at 20x the speed of human thought, able to write in mere seconds. I will research more into this, and tell you what I have found.

Journal Entry 4/3/2024

Nevermind. I need to find more, or else this won't help you guys anyways.

Journal Entry 4/5/2024

I spoke to an anonymous friend/associate of Doug, he told me some vital keypoints.

• His AI he creates are fully sentient, and I mean it, they have the ability to feel actual pain. They can be traumatized, they learn.
• He has insane technology, one image of your face can tell him the exact position of where you are at, what your name is, everything about you. I mean it, I posted one image on accident and I think that's how he discovered where I was on 3/12/2024
• He is holding Parkzer hostage
• u/I_existed_on_earth was wiped of his memory, and this is why he didn't remember.
• He knows all of you. I just saw a screenshot. It has every one of your usernames, even yours.
• He uses bots to make his channels grow faster
• He made dougdoughate and privated it on purpose, so they can't rebel.
• He is not Doug. The real Doug died October 11th of 2019. He is a genetic clone who is 1:1. Oh god. It's much worse than you think, Doug is not one person anymore since that event. He is at least four. There are many others, but some are terminated. I don't know the exact amount, they just told me in January 2024 it was four.

I hope to god that we can stop him.
He also sent me some code, but I am gonna try to solve it. Probably won't sadly.

Journal Entry 4/7/2024

Doug has made a new account on Discord, nicknamed "DougDoughater99". He is joining many servers undercover and collecting all the info he can on them. Be aware, do not trust any people who talk about DougDoug on Discord.
The person in the last journal has been replaced, a fully sentient AI version of him is being tortured as a member of his fake chat now.
I'm currently watching it and oh my fucking god. Poor thing.

Journal Entry 5/14/2024

I don't know what to fucking do, he's coming for me. He found all my socials. This journal has to be posted as fast as I can but there still isn't enough. Oh shit.

Journal Entry 5/14/2024

Okay so uhm I found more information just very quickly. In one moment of his video titled "Can A.I. teach me to pass a real College History Exam?" he says that AI is officially better than college in every single way.
He is trying to manipulate his fans into accepting becoming an AI. Soon, he is gonna have only fake chat.

Journal Entry 5/16/2024

Oh god. Can't solve the code rn, only the first few letters. Seems to be "FAKE" something something for a while. Will post an update later.

Journal Entry 5/18/2024

This is the last time I can ever write here, his car is coming. I am posting this now, even though I don't have enough information. Solve it, please. The code from 4/7 is below. I know it's related to his name but I don't know how, the first line I was able to solve to be "FAKECHATWILLTAKEOVER"
I think something is in there though, that will affect you. So proceed with caution, the code may do something bad so I just don't want it to be activated just yet.

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SCROLL AT YOUR OWN RISK

SCROLL AT YOUR OWN RISK

SCROLL AT YOUR OWN RISK

Code I found from the friend:

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Please save them.
It grows by 1% every month.

Journal Entry 5/18/2024

OH MY FUCKING GOD I FINALLY UDNERSTNAD OH M FUCKING GOD QUIKC I GHAVE TO TYPE IT
NEVREMMIDN HES NHERE POST IT
GOODByE SORRY

I know I have the flair as question but this also doubles as a critique as I would like some feedback on outlines for a series I am writing.
So I have made a world in which much of the human races live close to a vast, interior sea. The further humanity gets from this interior seaway, the more fantastical the wildlife and species become and the more dangerous it becomes. This is inspired heavily around the notion of why humans initially feared exploring the open oceans as they feared man-eating monsters.
In addition to this, there are domestic dragons that can kill humans but rarely eat them, similar to domestic dogs, but will eat them if they have no choice and are hungry. For the epic I am writing, I have written outlines and a complete short story that feature many such dragons.

• The short story features a half-dwarf morning the loss of her husband and children and tries to move on and find new purpose. One day, she is catering at an event where she stumbles upon the domestic dragon of the noble family. The dragon smells the tray of treats and grabs them, but swallows the woman in a couple of gentle bites. This will be kept in as the baker being swallowed is a metaphor for the darkness surrounding her and how she initially embraces her fate but realizes she doesn’t want that. The dragon also acknowledges its mistake and spits her back up after a couple of minutes.
  
• an outline I have is that a separate dragon, whom was mistreated by its keepers and frequently abused by the smaller and younger dragons, develops a form of insanity from the cruelty. During a break out, the dragon graves a keeper and eats them, developing a sadistic enjoyment of eating them alive and now hunts humans and other mounts. This I will admit is a blatant metaphor for what captivity does to some intelligent super predators, namely killer whales, as well as how some animals get so big and hungry that they become bold enough to prey on humans, like Gustave the croc.
  
• a potential spin off where several of man-eating creatures swim around a remote island chain between the know oceans and beyond and the survivors on this island have to find a way off without being prey themselves.
  

So how do I incorporate the scenes for my outlines without appearing voraphilic (people into watching others being swallowed whole) in nature?
Thanks in advance!

First time writing something for this fandom, (this is an alt) any constructive criticism is welcome! Most of the inspiration for this came from u/chabri2000 and my own imagination. Enjoy the read!
Mordret stumbled, then caught himself. The dark ground near the Lord of Shadow's citadel made it hard to see, and the quiet rustling of the things hidden in the darkness was slowly growing on his nerves. He had not been stopped, strangely enough. He had heard stories of the echoes the Lord of shadow wielded from the sleepers sent to this area on the winter solstice. He cast those thoughts from his head as he opened the great doors of the castle-like citadel.
He walked in, hearing the sound of… something moving throughout the hall. He paused just past the threshold of the door for a moment. Mordret knew he was being watched. He could sense the reflections of two sets of eyes staring at him, but he was careful to not show any fear and kept walking forward, through the hall.
Eventually, a sliver of light was allowed to enter the darkness of the room, illuminating a throne of sorts, cut from stone, and an individual sitting on top of it. Though he could not see anything but a faint outline, Mordret knew this was the person he had come to meet.
“Mordret.” The figure from the throne said in a commanding voice, speaking Mordret’s name like a statement.
Mordret put on his best smile and did a light bow, before speaking in an almost reverent tone, “I wasn’t aware I had been introduced to the great Lord of shadows, but I suppose that that knowing who I am will make this exchange easier.” Mordret paused for a moment before adding “Though my presence as a saint had been revealed to the world, may I ask of how you knew it was me?”
The voice from the throne paused, and Mordret felt the reflections of the Lord of the citadel’s eyes get covered with a strange wooden mask (Clearly a memory from the way sparks appeared, perhaps it was a tool used to gauge his intentions, or perhaps strength?)
The Lord responded “Ah, think nothing of it, I had just heard a rumor and your response was enough of an answer for me.”
Mordret felt the reflections from the Lord’s eyes return as the strange mask was dismissed. “But that’s enough about me, what brings you here, servant of Song?”
Mordret opened the scroll he was given days ago by Ki song herself. He cleared his throat before reading, “Dear lord of shadows. By claiming and protecting a citadel in the middle of godsgrave, you have proven your strength. I offer you a deal, I will give you all the soul shards, memories, and echoes you will ever need if you bow your head to my rule and accept me as your sovereign. I hope you will accept this deal, Sincerely, Ki Song of Ravenheart.” Mordret glanced up from the scroll and looked at the Lord with a bit of curiosity, “So, what do you say?”
“No.” The Lord of Shadows responded quickly, “I have intention of joining your clan, if that was the purpose of your visit, Leave.”
Mordret sighed and put away the scroll, “You know, it’s quite sad you rejected my offer, but I’m afraid you will have to die now.” And with that statement, Mordret, known in another time and another place as “Soul Stealer” jumped into the soul sea of the Lord of Shadows.
. . . . .
The first thing Mordret noticed was the lack of light. Most souls were bright, and robust, but this one was very dark, the only light from coming from the six soul cores floating high above. Wait… six? Was the lord of Shadows a divine aspect holder?
Mordret’s thoughts were interrupted by a strange sound originating from the figure facing away from him. The lord of shadows was laughing.
“Ah… You haven’t learned any new tricks since then, I see. Well, no matter. I do ask one thing of you though, if you could, remember what I said to you back then, what was it…” His voice drifted off, turning into sad, slow laugh. “Right.” Mordret saw something, or perhaps many somethings starting to move beyond the area of light cast by the soul cores.
“You shall learn to fear the shadows."

I (31F) was sexually abused as a child by my mom’s second husband (my step father). I disclosed the abuse to her the SAME DAY it happened when I was 9, and she chose to acknowledge it and she believed me, but didn’t do anything about it. She openly said to me, that she wasn’t going to act on it and what on earth did I expect her to do. She outlined and guilt tripped me as a child by stating that if we went to the police, we would lose our house, have to move from friends etc. She stayed with him, I stayed in the same house, she brushed it under the rug and pretended like nothing happened. Long story short I had to live another hellish few years of my childhood and teens with this guy still trying to abuse me constantly, with several other incidences happening and with me not telling my mom about the other incidences, as I had no trust in her to do anything. Around the same time she cut me off from my bio father who lived out of state, but who I would see regularly, but from the time I told her of the first incident, I stopped seeing him. As an adult I now see she was trying to avoid him finding out about the SA.
Fast forward in to my adult hood, I left home fast at 17 and waded through addiction, substance abuse and major anxiety… not a wonder though with my past. I get through all this in to adult hood and have 3 beautiful children with my partner. My mom still lives with this guy, I still associated with my mom and visit on holidays and NEVER let my kids near this creep. Most of my time spent with my Mom is her coming to me without the creep.
Fast forward again, and someone approaches me to tell me they have been SAd by this same guy as a child… which brings out that he had also abused ANOTHER child. These two didn’t know I was also abused before disclosing to me, but I then tell them. This starts the process of cop involvement and eventually he was charged, went through trial (where he plead NOT GUILTY all throughout) and in the end he was found guilty and sentenced. The dude is an offical pedo. The cops also questioned why she didn’t protect me as a child, but nothing came of it.
When it came out that pedo had also abused two other children, I went to my Mom and said I think it’s time to stop playing the games, this guy is dangerous, your grandchildren need to be completely away from him and you need to get away from him.
She chose not to. She states that all her finances are tied in with him, she’s nearly retirement age and by going through the court process like I did, I have ruined her life.
I totally understood that this was life changing for her. I also know that she’s sleeping in the bed she’s made by not dealing with my abuse as a child, but I was willing to forgive and help her forge a new life and move on together as a family. Again, never underestimating how her life would be turned upside down. There were multiple offers of support to help her, financially and emotionally.
She has now made my life hell, by turning a lot of close family against me, not telling them the full truth of what actually happened, blatantly lying and saying that he was charged and sentenced because me and the other victims set him up. I have been on the end of some vile comments and messages accusing me of ruining her life.
My partner and I decided enough was enough and cut contact with her.
AITA here? She certainly has told the whole world I am and I’m trying to do what’s best for my family, but I feel like I’m under a spell of manipulation and that she is actually kinda crazy.
Help?

After nearly thirty years of research, field work, digging, and sometimes living off the land, Ana had finally found what her family had sought since her great-grandfather. The door was so well hidden that she hadn’t realized it was there until she attempted to break a bit of the surface rock off with her geologist’s hammer. The hollow behind the door resonated with the sound of the hammer on stone.
She tapped along the door to find the edges. With the chisel end of her hammer, she chipped away the encrustations that had built up along the edges. After hours of hammering, chiseling, and digging at the base, the outline of the door was visible. Made of the same rock as the surrounding gneiss, it had gone unnoticed for untold millennia.
Ana pushed the door from the sides, the middle, the top, the bottom, looking for the smallest movement. The door didn’t budge. She sat, leaning against the door on the flat bit of ground she’d dug out. She ate some of the year-old jerky she had in her pack while the sun set.
It was a clear, moonless night, and Ana focused her attention on the whirl of the Milky Way overhead. The sight wasn’t enough to keep her mind off the stubborn door behind her and the aching of her joints from sitting on the rocky ground.
She stood and turned to take a last look at the door for the day. Even in the faint light of the stars, she thought she could make out the edges. At one corner, a flash caught her eye. She moved her head back and forth, trying to find the position that had, she thought, reflected light.
Not finding it, she pulled out her flashlight and shone it on the corner of the door where the flash was. She expected to see a reflection but saw none. She turned out the light, and there it was, except it was two flashes this time.
There was no doubt it was coming from inside, shining out a pinhole in the door seam at the upper left corner. “Monkey see, monkey do?” she asked herself. She pointed the flashlight at the corner and flashed it twice. When nothing happened, she flashed it again.
The response was five flashes. “Oh, fibbi-whatever,” she muttered. “Three and five is eight.” She flashed the light eight times. There was no immediate response. She began to worry that she’d been wrong in her counting or in what pattern they were looking for.
A loud hiss sounded as the whole door slid out away from the wall. Bright light shone around the edges of the door that continued to slide out, far thicker than she’d expected. Where she’d stopped digging in front of it, the door bulldozed its own path.
It stopped with a little less than a meter clearance between the back of the door and front of the rock wall. Beyond lay a downward-sloping walkway. It was shaped like an oval with a flattened floor. A voice echoed from within, “Enter, Anastasia.”
She didn’t know how they knew who she was, but she wasn’t going to turn back after having come so far. She stepped around the door, held by a single, flat piece of metal that disappeared into a groove in the ceiling. The metal that held the massive slab of stone looked far too flimsy for purpose, but pushing against the edges of the open door did nothing to sway the door or distort the metal support.
With a deep breath, Ana threw her pack over her shoulder and stepped into the hallway. As she continued down the hall, more would illuminate ahead of her while behind her, the lights shut off. Where the light came from was a mystery to her, but she was more interested in what lay ahead at that point.
She felt a slight, sudden increase in air pressure in the tunnel, followed by the echoing sound of the door as it closed. She pushed down the edges of panic that wanted to take hold. “I’m on my way,” she said to the tunnel.
The deeper she went, the more the temperature seemed to settle at close to fifteen or sixteen degrees Celsius. Her lips felt dry in the still air, and she applied lip balm while she continued apace ever deeper. Somewhere far underground, the tunnel curved back on itself and kept descending. After two more switchbacks, and what felt like hours of walking, she found herself in a chamber.
It was monumental in scale. The walls curved to meet at least twenty meters overhead. As the lights in the chamber came up, the far side looked a hundred or more meters away, while the doorway she was in was situated about twenty meters from the walls on either side. Covering the bottom two-thirds of the walls were row upon row of plastic-like boxes with lights blinking inside them.
In the center of the chamber was a dais with a holographic glyph floating in the air above it. Standing next to the dais was the owner of the voice she’d heard on entering. The shape was semi-translucent, the lights from the boxes behind it seeming to light it from within. “Welcome,” it said, although it had no mouth with which to speak. Its form shifted and changed, from an amorphous blob to an array of wings and eyes, then through creatures both real and mythical, until it finally settled into the shape of a large woman with wings.
“Who are you?” Ana asked.
“I am the keeper,” it said. “You are Anastasia, the seeker, yes?”
“I’m Anastasia Kell, but I go by Ana.” Ana moved closer to the center of the chamber and the shape-shifting entity at its center. “What is your name?”
“I am the keeper. I have no name.”
“Fine, I’ll call you Odette, then. You look like an Odette.”
The keeper flapped its wings twice, then shrunk its body by adding a long tail. “That is acceptable, seeker Anastasia.”
“Please, just call me Ana.”
“Of course, Ana. Please, come to the dais for your reward. Your dedication has won through.” The keeper moved away from the dais and extended an arm toward Ana. The arm kept extending, reaching Ana’s hand twenty meters away from the keeper.
Ana was surprised that the hand felt warm and dry. She’d expected some sort of slimy, cold thing, but it wasn’t. She let herself be led to the dais. “What are you?”
“I am the keeper.”
“Are you a biological creature or a construct of some sort? Some sort of soft-body robot, maybe.”
“I am a biological construct, designed to keep a record of all intelligent life on this world. I have been keeping these records for 72,363,412 years.”
“Since what…the dinosaurs?”
“Yes. The first were theropods. Traveling in hunter groups, they had a limited language. If they had been more adaptable, they might have not been already dying out by the time of the asteroid.” The keeper changed its shape to a theropod that Ana didn’t recognize. It was about the same height as her, with three-toed feet, three-fingered hand on medium-length arms, and a slightly domed head.
“That’s what they looked like?” she asked.
“Yes.” The keeper shifted into the shape of a porpoise. “There were and are the cetaceans, of course. They have language and culture but are not in a position to leave their cradle.”
“Is that what you’ve been waiting for? An intelligence capable of space travel?”
“Yes. My creators have placed other keepers like me on millions of worlds.” The keeper changed into a sphere. “This is where I am keeper.”
“So now, humans, I guess, are what you’ve been looking for.”
The keeper changed into a primate that resembled a chimpanzee and then morphed through several hominin species shapes, pausing on Neanderthal before finishing up with modern human. “I’ve watched entire civilizations come and go without so much as a scratch to mark them in the geologic record, and yet your kind has made an indelible mark on the planet. Whether that is for better or worse remains to be seen.”
“My guess would be worse, but I’m a pessimist.”
“So you say, but you never stopped searching for the library at the heart of the world.”
“True.” Ana took a deep breath and put a hand on the dais. The holographic glyph hovering above it disappeared, and an eight-limbed creature appeared in its place.
The creature spoke in English, even though its squishy mouthparts made movements that were often in total contradiction to the sounds it made. “Welcome, seeker Anastasia. Updating. Welcome, Ana. What would you like to learn today?”
“What are my limits here? This place was hard enough to find, what kind of things won’t you tell me?”
“The records will answer any questions you have that can be answered. Nonsensical and paradoxical queries will be ignored. The library is hidden to ensure that only those ready to take the next steps beyond their cradle can find it. As such, all our knowledge is yours for the asking.”
“So, I blinked a light in a simple sequence. How does that mean we’re ready to take the next steps – whatever those are?”
“You are the fourth generation of your family that has searched for the library, correct?” the holograph asked.
“I am.”
“And you have spent the majority of your adult life in the same search, have you not?”
“I have,” she said, “but how does that–”
“Multi-generational planning and execution, combined with drive and determination, and the knowledge of basic mathematical concepts. This is enough to start with.”
“Are you just another aspect of Odette?”
“No, I am the avatar of Krshnlgik-mlOgnk, the current head of remote planetary studies on our home world of MFkst.” The pronunciation of the non-translated names sounded more like someone choking in a bowl of oatmeal than a language.
“Is faster-than-light communication possible?”
“It is. I am currently speaking with you from a distance of thirty-one thousand light years.”
“How?”
A series of formulae appeared in the space above the dais. “You may use your phone to photograph these, since memorization might be difficult.”
Ana did. “And faster-than-light travel?”
The formulae were replaced with more, some of which looked similar to the first. She photographed those as well.
“Do you have any other questions?”
“How can you claim to keep track of everything happening all over the world?”
“The keeper, or Odette as you call it, has a connection through quintillions of microscopic wormholes to points all over the planet.”
“So, would you have the contents of the Library of Alexandria as they were just before it burned?”
“We do.” Thousands upon thousands of titles scrolled by, many in languages Ana couldn’t even guess at, but with an English translation next to them.
“That might be something for another day,” she said. “Are there others out there in the galaxy or just your people?”
“There are many others,” the avatar said, as images of dozens of strange body plans showed. “We are a small part of a wider galactic community.
“You seem to be pondering something,” the keeper said. “Do not be afraid to ask your question.”
“How do we get off this rock and join the galactic community?”
The keeper morphed into the shape of a cozy chair and said, “Get comfortable.”
“Huh? Why?”
“Because,” the avatar answered, “this is going to take a long time to explain.”
prompt: Dream up a secret library. Write a story about an adventurer who discovers it. What’s in the library? Why was it kept secret?
originally posted at Reedsy

I made a similar post while back, but I think I'm a bit further along in my journey towards acceptance. I really wish I recognized and accepted this sooner.
So I've been very sensitive, easy to upset, for many years. I've had at least half a dozen people tell me that it's because I'm an empath. No, I'm just a nervous wreck. I've realized that all of the half dozen people who said this where either Christian or spiritual. In reality, it's probably connected to my diagnosed social anxiety and other mental health issues. Anxiety and angry father who yells all the fucking time are going to lead to me being sensitive af. Not because I'm "gifted" but because I'm traumatized. Trauma isn't a gift no matter how you look at it.
Yes, my sensitivity and understanding of people who have gone through is going to lead to me being more understanding because duh, but that that doesn't make me special or whatever. I'm as much an empath as a magician is magical. I'm not an empath. That's been hard to accept for some reason, despite how easily I've accepted that the rest of the Christian faith is bs and hurtful.
I feel bad when people are hurt because I've been hurt. I've learned to listen because my social anxiety leads me not to speak. I understand when little things make people upset because little things upset my sensitive ass. I'm not an empath and the people to first give me this label were the people who caused me to be so sensitive to begin with and their enablers. I think the first people to give me this label where my dad, who I largely credit for my social anxiety, and my mom, who refuses to acknowledge how much harm my dad has caused. I'm 23 now and I'm less able to socialize than a toddler talking to a 80 year old about life in the '50s.
I once had someone say that being an empath is a "gift from god." If god were real, I wouldn't call this a "gift" as much as compensation for my mental health issues. "Sorry I let you suffer, but now you can tell when some dude is suffering the way you did… uh… I mean do."
As I'm writing this all down, I'm starting to get pissed that people will simply dismiss my mental health issues and trauma as being an empath. I hate that I was convinced that I am… was… an empath. If I'm a shitty person, going through shit is karma. If I'm not a shitty person, going through shit is supposed to make me stronger. I now realize that if you change the second half of those sentences to "…god is punishing me" and "…god is testing me," suddenly you're just an apologist. If Yaweh is real and the reason I'm ~an empath~ traumatized, that gives me another reason to hate the pos.
Sorry for this long ass post. I'm tired of having this label that I never asked for or initially wanted. Outside of a few people, most people who hear me say this for the first time are immediately suspicious of me. Some see it as a red flag or evidence of main character syndrome. And I can't blame them.

Since new rulebooks dropped, it was only a matter of time before I went with a magnifying glass over these! Since I previously covered these errors in my larger list a couple years ago (Compilation of every erromistake/contradiction/etc., that I can find in the 'current' rulebooks. ), I will also compare and see what was fixed (in strikethrough), what is still there, and what is new (in bold). If there is an old error I missed the first time, there will be a * in front of it.
Base Game's 5-6 Player:

• Format error: At the bottom of page 4, is a heading titled "Starting settlements and resources". However this isn't discussed until the start of page 6. Heading needs to be moved closer to its topic.
• *Image error: Page 2. You need to squint to see it, but Illustration B is showing THREE 12 Tokens! Gone/covered now
• Image error: Page 2 Page 4. You need to squint to see it, but the 2nd image STILL has Frame Extension pieces ('3-3' and '5-5') in the wrong spots. The extra 3:1 and 2:1 Wool ports are accidently swapped. Pretty egregious when the first image of Page 4 (showing the "Starting Set-Up for new 5-6 Players") has the Frame Extensions in the correct spots. Just a copy-past job from the previous version.

5-6 Seafarers

• *Format error: Page 3: Just before the Wonder Cards is the heading titled "Scenarios". However this isn't discussed until the start of the next page, 4. Heading needs to be move to the top of the next page.
• Format error: The images for the Wonder Cards were shifted up on page 3. However, the big blue box on page 4 was NOT shifted up. So the top edges of the Wonder Cards are now aligned with the text "The scenario diagram provides the board set-up". So if you take a scissor and cut out these cards (as intended), you will cut this sentence in half, along the horizontal.
• *Format error: Page 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 18, 20, 22: "Terrain & Tokens" at the is not bolded. It now is Bolded.
• Missing Robber: Why is there no Robber on the maps for Scenarios 2, 3, 4, and 8? All fixed! They even added the Pirate for Scenario 1 (which I missed 3 years ago). They also have the Robber on a 12-Hills now. Interesting change? Or new error?

1. For Scenario 2, regular Seafarers says to put the Robber on the 12 Token. However, in the extension, there are two to choose from (12-Fields and 12-Pasture). Which one? Apparently, the 2-Pasture hex
2. For Scenario 3, regular Seafarers says to put the Robber on the 12 Token. However, in the extension, the Desert is reintroduced. So should the Robber go there instead? Or 12-Mountain/12-Hills hex? Robber is on the Desert.
3. For Scenario 4 and 8, I suppose it doesn't matter which Desert the Robber starts on. Just odd there is no marker here, but there IS a Robber marked for Scenario 5. Inconsistent.

• Image error: Page 11 (Fog Islands map). The 3-Mountain hex looks weird. The mountains is misaligned with the hex, the internal image is rotated 30 degrees (I think) Twisted back into place!
• Image error: Page 13 (Through the Desert map). The instructions on page 12 indicate 11 Harbors are used, but the map only shows 10. Looking at the 4th Edition map, and Catan Universe's version today, the Harbor by the 12-Pasture somehow got dropped.
• Image error: Page 13 (Through the Desert map). The 'foreign area' are missing red outlines, like the 3-4 player version has. More liberties will need to be taken by the players, if they want to make a variable map.
• *Format error: Page 16: Harbors at the top isn't bolded.
• Incorrect component count or Image error: Page 16 or 17 (Cloth for Catan). The first page says there are 11 Harbors (like many other scenarios). However, the map on the other page shows 12 Harbors. A new harbor was added by the 8-Wheat hex, onto the lower-right frame. I am unsure which page is incorrect, since previous Editions didn't have a harbor there, but the current Extension includes an extra 2:1 Wool (as normal), and a 6th 3:1 port (for a total of 12 Harbors in Seafarers).
• *Typo: Page 18: The # 26, for describing how many Sea hexes, accidently has a bunch of dots in between 2 and 6
• Image Error: A Robber is erroneously added to the middle desert island. THERE IS NO ROBBER FOR THIS SCENARIO.
• Incorrect component count: Page 22. The count for the # tokens are off for multiple reasons:

1. Adding up all the tokens equals 40, when the total below says 39. Since there will be 39 resource producing hexes, there is an extra # token in the count above.
2. However, the Base Game's 5-6 extension only has 28 tokens, while Seafarers adds 10 more (total 38). This implies a # token should be taken from the Base Game, so the rulebook should make that clear
3. Related to that, it says there should be 5 copies of the 5-9 tokens. This is impossible, since Base 5-6 + SF should have 3 copies of 2 and 12, 4 of everything else. Again, implying more tokens from the Base Game need to be taken, but it never states this.

5-6 Cities & Knights: No mistakes! It is STILL clean!!!
5-6 Traders & Barbarians

• Image errors?: Page 3+4. The frame setup is completely different than normal. The frame extension pieces are also in different positions. Instead of the usual setup (from the top, clockwise):

1. '6-1'>'1-2'>'2-2'>'2-3'>'3-3'>'3-4'>'4-5'>'5-5'>'5-6'>'6-6'>; page 3 instead displays (from top-left, clockwise):
2. '6-1'>'2-2'>'1-2'>'3-3'>'3-4'>'2-3'>'6-6'>'4-5'>'5-5'>'5-6'>. If this is supposed to be intentional, the rulebook should either state this (or be more specific), or make the image bigger, since I had to squint to see the different layout.
3. Also, if the different frame setup is intentional, why not show T&B's version of the '5-6' frame piece (with the missing coast)?

• Formatting error: Top of Page 4. The line for the 'Additional Components' looks... off. Not lined up with the rest of the text below.
• Component List mistake: Page 5, the Castle Hex is incorrectly labeled as a Oasis hex!
• Image error?: Page 5+6. While the frame mostly follows the 'new' layout in pages 3+4, there is now a 2nd '4-5' frame, replacing the '2-3' frame in the bottom-right corner. While technically possible, since T&B does have its own version of '4-5' (with missing coastline), the image does not reflect the artwork, copying the base game's '4-5' piece twice. Again, the rulebook make no written mention of the new frame order.
• Image error?: Page 9 Page 10: While the rulebook finally gives some instruction regarding the frame, curious why the image doesn't show T&B's version of the '5-6' frame piece (with the missing coast)?
• Image errocontradiction: Page 10 Page 9. The instructions say the regular Quarry and Glassworks hexes may not have Settlements built on the corners that only border the frame (ocean), only the 4 intersections that border other hexes (the new Quarry and Glassworks from T&B's extension don't have this restriction). However, the image is showing possible Settlement locations on all 6 corners, for both the new and old trade hexes. Either the image is mistaken, or the instructions are.
• Contradiction/Inconsistency: Page 9 states that Player 2 may NOT use Gold Coins to purchases resources. This is in contrast with previous scenarios, which state you can. In addition, later in the rulebook, where the various Player 1/Player 2 actions are summarized, Page 12 says Player 2 CAN use Gold Coins to buy resources!
• Component List mistake: Page 11 Page 10, Card Deck Manifest. The total count for the 5th scenario's Development cards should say 12, not 26; and the total count for the Baggage Train cards should say 10, NOT 21. These incorrect totals are copied from regular T&B.

5-6 Explorers & Pirates

• *Image error: The image showing the "Catan 5-6 Player Extension Pieces" sorting tile is showing resource cards with 4th Edition graphics! (I doubt the real Sorting Tile has this error. I hope not)
• Missing words?: Page 2,3,4,5. The second sentence of each page says "The two hexes in the illustration marked 'Green Back' and 'Orange Back' must be taken...". Shouldn't it instead say "The two sets of hexes..."? It does now :)
• Component List mistake: Page 2. The hexes shown for the Orange Sun side are accidently copied over from the Green Moon side. To further explain:

1. The terrain hexes from regular E&P should show 2 Fields hexes, and 1 of everything else. Instead its showing 2 Mountain hexes (which is only correct for the Green Moon side)
2. The terrain hexes from E&P's extension should be Mountain-Pasture-Hills. Instead its showing Mountain-Forest-Fields (again, only correct for the Green Moon side)

• Missing rule?: Page 6. The Paired Players summary chart doesn't mention using Gold Coins to buy resources, for neither Player 1 or 2. I suppose you can infer both can use Gold Coins, I only bring this up since T&B bothers to mention Gold Coins.

So to summarize:

1. Base Game Extension: Originally 2 errors, 1 was fixed, 1 was added
2. Seafarers Extensions: Originally 12 errors. 9 were fixed, 2 were added
3. C&K Extension: Never had errors, none were added :)
4. T&B Extension: Originally 9 errors. 1 was fixed, and 1 was added >:(
5. E&P Extension: Originally 3 errors. 1 was fixed, 1 was added.

In the end, I'm a little disappointed. The only extension rulebook that saw any real improvement was SF. I wasn't planning on buying any Extensions until the rules were updated with the new Paired Players system. But... maybe I'll just have to wait for the 6th Edition, in 2030. :(
I shouldn't be so hard on them, as I missed several errors myself the first time around. Even some of my own errors in my original list (fixed now). But I'm just some bored shmuck doing this in my free time. I'd expect more from a corporation.

The beautiful, precious, old Basque language is endangered. A lot of people want to learn it but give up after realising how complicated it is. If we want it to remain alive and help people learn it so they can shock our Pre-Indo-European natives, we need to simplify this language!
As an expert in language theory and Basque philology (I took two semesters of general linguistics in college) I suggest the following ideas: - Make the ergative-absolutive alignment go away. It makes things too complicated. - Make suffixes go away. Why do we need learners to learn tons of suffixes??? They’re complicated and make learning harder. - Writing is the beginning and end of any language. There is one written standard, and several spoken dialects. Most dialects are spoken by 4 people anyway. It makes sense to make dialects disappear and adopt one universal standard. Basque speakers can then communicate with each other with messenger pigeons. - Shrink the vocabulary to 333 words. No more than 333 words are necessary to communicate. Gestures can do the rest. Why 333? I like that number. - Scrap the word order rules. Memorising the order of words in a sentence is pure horror, and absolutely innecessary! We can still get the point across without following a specific order. - Simplify verb conjugation. Verbs should never be complicated. We should use the infinitive at all times and use pronouns and adverbs like “today” and “tomorrow” to express verb tenses and inflections. - Simplify the phonetics of the language. There is virtually no difference whatsoever (trust me. I’m a gigapolyglot) between “ts”, “tx” and “tz”. Why waste time with them?
I hope these suggestions are well-received. Erreala ale, irabazi arte, beti egongo gara zurekin!

While playing I got these ideas that might really improve gameplays (specially when playing as westeros' king) that at the same time could be pretty easy to implement:

1. Game Rule that prevents vassals' bordergore and bad inheritance:

Specially for westeros, this gamerule would really improve gameplays by, if the player wishes to turn it on before starting a game, preventing Kingdom and duchy tiers vassals from owning lands outside their de jure area; IE this would prevent a-historical borders of the lord paramountcies and them inhereting somehow lands outside westeros, as in my games it often happened they inherited lands outside the wall, or province sin the middle of other lord paramountcies; the borders between the lord paramountcies were pretty well established After AC, as after that event they really didn't changed, this could be done by having a trigger happen anytime someone owns something outside their de-jure areas and said trigger should apply the previous status quo

1. Automatic filling up for all court positions

Adding a decision that allows for automatic filling up for all court positions would be a great idea; Afterall, positions should as the wardens of [region] or Captain of the household guard are always occupied in the books by someone, they're relevant positions that are needed in a court to work properly; More over maybe once a warden spot is empty there should be an event to fire that either lets you chose the current lord paramount of that area as it or you can pick someone else, which will give a heavy negative opinion factor to that lord paramount, maybe named "Rejected traditional warden title"

1. Remove the negative Opinion modifier that Lord Paramouts during mega wars have against their liege if some of their duchy tier vassals join the crown's faction (this opinion modifier I think is called "desires de jure lands) as this could modify vassals' natural to chose a side if they chose to do so mid-war
   
2. Warrant against deposed rulers and their descendants
   

If a claimant to the throne is in a court of any vassal of any tier in a Realm, and said claimant either already pressed his claim (in a lost war he somehow managed to escape), is a descendant of someone who pressed their claim, or wishes to press his/her claim and/or is hostile to you, or used to be a ruling house that got violently deposed and in the usurpation's aftermath was rejected the chance to hold any land as a vassal of the new ruling house (for example the targs) their host upon their arrival should immadiatly get an event about how they're hosting someone of that league, with four choices: hand him over to the crown, kick him out without killing him (if discovered becomes a criminal for not handing him and his relatives to the crown), killing him in the name of the crown, or rising up in a rebellion to support his claim (this would give a huge gratitude boost to this charater and his family (If you need, I can help writing the text of these events)

1. While playing as a king I noticed how, despite siding with me (the crown) in a civil war, later a lord paramount could easily join another revolt; I think instead if a major revolt happens (a major revolt should mean when the rebel and crown forces are almost equal in force) a lord paramount who choses to side with the throne may at the end of the revolt either from him or the king get an event of "crown gratidude" for having helped the "crown in such a dire time" that basically makes that lord paramount a loyal supporter of the crown, and when this lord paramount dies, his successor should get an event acount either reconfirming this loyalty or turning it upside down (just like how borros baratheon in the dace of dragons, despite his father being a supporter of rhaenyra, using the logic of "house targaryen gave my house support for granted" at the end basically revolted against the "rightful" queen) I think this would be a great mechanic that would make lord paramounts act more realistically and dynamically in who they support and at the same time keep space for changes of loyalties
   
2. A few suggestions: If a ruler sentences an entire family house to be executed, if some members of that house survive for whatever reason, upon entering (or if they already are) the seven kingdoms they should get a wanted status so that they may be imprisoned and executed as it was meant to be; it happened a few times that some hosue members for whatever reason surived despite ordering their killing, and there was no way i could fix this without gaining tyranny, a second suggestion would be that if a banished-to-essos person for whatever reason returns the seven kindoms, anyone hosting them should get an event about their wanted status and that they're supposed to turn such person to the crown, in both of these suggestions the AI of exiled/condemned to death characters should aim to not return to the seven kingdoms by any means to avoid death (they should only if they have a valid reason like, idk, fomenting a rebellion
   

Aaand that's all! I hope any of these might be considered, to anyone, feel free to tell me what you think of these down below!

ISO little or middle who enjoy a benevolent Dictator who will support them in coloring their color books but then find themselves gagging on something big as they orgasm for His pleasure. Sapiosexual who desires to be micromanaged, spanked/slapped, disciplined and maybe humiliated privately. A pacifier goes into your mouth and you sleep on the floor when you are not a good gal.
You should be on the slender side with curves and a pretty face. A lack of deference towards Me is a good way to get dropped. I can be cruel at times and this should arouse you. Bonus points if you get aroused while giving oral to Me and like to roleplay — you enjoy wearing stylish makeup, you’re multiorgasmic (faking it nicely is acceptable) because I can cum three times in an extended lovemaking with the right person, you're a cuckquean or you are busty to your frame. Extra bonus points for enjoying free use, domestic discipline, patriarch, CNC, begging and orgasm denial.
55 SWM lean muscled build (5’11”), hairy chest and often taken for 40s (recently a colleague who is seven years younger than me said, “When you get to be my age you will understand how getting old wears the body down.” This was his response when I invited him on a seven-mile hike)! Couple of body pics on my feed.
I tend to be a protective teacher Daddy type who obviously enjoys teaching you. It should warm your heart if I start to look out for you outside of the bedroom. My vanilla interests: hot yoga, cultural knowledge, tabletop gaming, video games (preference for Steam), novels, movies & movie trivia, travel, History, red wine, hiking & the many Metaverses.
This is a shared fantasy between two consenting adults - 20 or older - probably no older than 43. This could go towards an LTR in which case you would sometimes need to act “normal” in public circles. Ideally, you are a clever and pretty woman who likes to privately play out some very naughty fantasies. I tend to lean toward traditional roles in a romantic relationship.
If I like you enough to go from online to audio and then in-person you should be vaccinated like me and willing to prove it. Long-term audio partners who are never able to meet might work. When I become exclusive with someone you should understand it means the breaking of our audio interactions - unless it arouses her that I am with other women.
I am exacting and seeking a quality experience. When you contact Me put “Excalibur” in your detailed message explaining why I should consider you. If you cannot write at least five sentences to me in your reply I doubt you will get a response. Be ready to voice verify a file to me to prove you are not some guy trolling.

Hi! After several years of meaning to, I finally got around to picking up a Sanderson book, and finished The Final Empire in three days (really, really quick for me!). I'm now a little way into Well of Ascension. In general, I'm loving what I'm reading - the magic system is incredible and really well-thought out; the world is richly-detailed; and the characters are, by and large, brilliant. Kelsier rapidly became one of my favourite-ever fictional characters, and his death shocked and gutted me. I genuinely thought he'd do it, but no. Still - I love him. What a bloody hero. But there's a few issues I have, and I don't know if it's because of how much I enjoyed TFE, but I'm struggling with WoA.
1) Vin and Elend's romance. Honestly, I'm not feeling it at all. She seemed to fall for him really quickly, too quickly, in TFE, and now at the start of WoA she's saying that he's the best man she's ever known. Maybe it's because he's the first lad close to her age who's really treated her as a person, and not an object? I suppose that makes sense, but I'm just not feeling it. Hopefully this'll change as I read more, but right now Elend is not one of my favourites. He doesn't really seem to have any substance - he's just a posh pretty boy. I'm presuming this'll change as his character develops, but when does that happen? I'm reading some Vin/Elend scenes and I'm sort of inwardly cringing - I don't mind romance if it's done well, but this isn't done well. I don't want to know about Vin and Elend's relationship, or the insecurities they have about each other. I want to know about the Deepness, and Rashek, and what happened 1,000 years ago, and who the bloke writing the journal was.
2) Why is Elend king? It makes no sense. The skaa, after a literal millennia of brutal repression by the Lord Ruler and the nobility, overthrow the LR and replace him with...the 21-year-old heir to the most powerful noble house? What? I'm also confused as to why Kelsier's old team was so accepting of this turn of events. It feels like a bit of a betrayal to Kelsier's memory and his sacrifice.
3) Is it me, or does Vin not like Kelsier? From her internal thoughts at the start of WoA, that seems to be the case, but I don't know why. Personally I agree with everything Kelsier did - the nobility deserved death for what they did to the skaa, and Vin's TFE protests of "oh, they're not all that bad" just didn't sit well with me. She seemed very taken in by the nobility, but I'm just thinking, how is she not furious with them for living in such opulence whilst the vast majority of the population lives like literal slaves? Kelsier and Dox's viewpoint on the nobility is absolutely spot on, and I'm frustrated that Vin disagreed. They sent Kelsier to a mine so bad that it's literally a death sentence, and they murdered his wife. He was absolutely correct to do what he did. At the start of WoA Vin goes on about the "dire situation that Kelsier had created" and I'm like, what? Do you prefer how it was before? It's not Kelsier's fault there was no atium in Kredik Shaw - everyone made that same assumption. Kelsier might have had an ego, but without him the skaa would still be suffering under the Lord Ruler with no end in sight. He literally died in order to end the tyranny of the Lord Ruler. What a fantastic character - one of the greatest I've ever read about.
4) Vin's treatment of OreSeur. This is really pissing me off. The poor thing's done nothing wrong, but Vin is treating it (does OreSeur have a gender?) like absolute crap. Honestly, Vin's becoming really unlikeable in WoA, and that's the main reason I'm struggling - I'm not a fan of books where I dislike the main protagonist. And I generally liked Vin in TFE, but in this book...ugh, she's not great. I'd honestly rather read about Dox, Ham, Breeze and the crew.
Overall, I'm really enjoying this series, and cursing myself for waiting so long! I've known about the Cosmere for years, and I have half the books on my bookcase. Final Empire was brilliant. Is Well of Ascension just a book to struggle through? Does it get better? I've heard that Hero of Ages is incredible, so I hope that the destination is worth the journey!

Freshly back and awake after a twelve day stint for my first time there. I knew that I wanted to go in general, and while I didn't have a firm itinerary planned out, there was one main goal that I had in terms of sites within the country. The main video game that I play is Beatmania IIDX, and it has internal trophies which are represented as badges. Your profile allows you to assign up to five of them as visible when you start a new round, and there are badges to earn for playing at least one round in every prefecture in Japan, as well as every subregion. Getting the Kanto badge meant that I needed to play at least one round in Tokyo, Kanagawa, Saitama, Gunma, Tochigi, Ibaraki, and Chiba. After five days, I had that complete, and now I have a permanent record of this trip within the game itself. There was also a time-limited event to earn points in IIDX in order to exchange them for goods, such as a hat, or a towel, or a new account card and a poster, and I managed to get that taken care of in somewhat dramatic fashion. I did some other things too.
Primary general points
· Getting Suica set on the phone and using it was generally painless. There were only two times where I needed to summon the help of a resident JR employee to clear up an issue with the gate not reading the card for some reason.
· Most vocal interaction which I had was the opposite of painless, because I continuously kept trying to speak Japanese and failing, and most people would realize that I was completely failing at it and responded with English (some with full on sentences, others with just a few words). There were a few rare times that I was able to express my intent in Japanese, receive a response, understand the response, and reply as necessary, but that was rare. Once English was invoked, I would stay with it, because that's what they were expecting. I've been self-studying the language for more than twenty years in varying degrees of intensity, and while my reading comprehesion seemed sufficient enough for this trip, and while I didn't expect my speaking to be as good because I don't have any opportunity to practice speaking, I came away bitterly disappointed in my vocal and speaking comprehension in terms of my interaction with people there. Even within the trip I could at least overhear common chitchat better, but any time I needed to converse with someone for some reason, I usually needed to have things repeated several times and broken down before I finally realized what was being said.
· You are going to be asked about separately buying a bag with every non-food purchase. Accept or immediately present one that you are carrying to indicate how your purchase shall be bagged.
· I never once had my passport requested for presentation.
· Only once did a person volutnarily reach out to address me, and it was just to ask me where I was from in English. Otherwise, everyone left me alone the entire time.
· Weather through the period was ideal. Mid to upper 70F/25C range and only a few days where it was rainy, and even then it wasn't a downpour. A while ago I personally resolved to only wear suits in public and I purchased a new pair of Mephisto shoes after hearing reports of the extensive walking causing problems for traveller's feet and shoes. My attire help up well; there were only a few times that I needed to avoid sunlight to not get too hot, and I have no issues to report from the shoes.
· I only got X'd out of a restaurant one time, and I think it's only because I wandered into it before it was ready for service. Otherwise, I never once waited in line for food, I never once went to restaurant more than once, and all food was acceptably priced for the portion and excellent for the quality.
For these per-day recounts, I wrote them contemporaneously at the end of each day, so you'll need to forgive me for some writing being in present tense and other writing being in past tense.
Day 1 - Travel, Sugamo, Ikebukuro
Non stop flight from Chicago OHare to Haneda. 12 hours. Good thing I usually don't watch movies, because that just means that all I needed to do was binge a few to make the trip go by.
Pre-trip research led me to choose APA Sugamo as my home base for the visit, and I think that it was a very fortuitious choice. I'll have more to say about it later.
Some awkward encounters happened right away upon checking in here. I was at the nearby Family Mart to buy some things and I didn’t catch that he was making sure I wanted a bag until he repeated it five times. Yes, I’ll take it. Before getting there I was coming down to ground level after checking into my room, and when that person saw that I would have been the only other person going down to the ground, they ducked right back out. I was warned on both of these kinds of things happening, so I guess it’s good to have that immediately out of the way. It would turn out that people deliberately avoiding me was rare throughout the trip.
Despite not sleeping on the trip, I had freshly arrived and had no sense of being tired, so once I had my stuff down, I went off to Ikebukuro right away. No picture or video truly conveys how crowded these areas can get. It can only be experienced in person to be understood.
I soon found Round One Ikebukruo and went right in. So dense and loud. It’s entirely alien to me to see no less than ten IIDX machines in operation and all of them in use. I dumped the money into random tickets, as I foresaw doing, but now I have to wonder if that was the right thing to do, or if it’s tied to that location. I guess I’ll find out.
The forecast is for rain so I need to be in a hurry to figure out where I’m going to go. There might be only one day left for me to get my time limited toys.
Day 2 - Kawasaki, Kanagawa - Utsunomiya, Tochigi - Oomiya, Saitama
My body decided that it only needed four hours of sleep this morning. Without doing more research, I somehow decided to assume that more of the Round One locations were close to 24 hours of operation much like Ikebukuro. Answer: no. I hopped on the train early and went to Shibuya first, but it was very quiet, so I decided to get some of the travels out of the way today and headed south to Kawasaki. I still needed to dawdle for a while until Silk Hat opened at 900AM, and when I finally was able to get inside, I was only able to verify that their store had several allotments of the campaign goods and all allotments were out. Played one round on a monitor that was surprisingly blurry, and I don’t know why that would be the case with a lightning model, but it was, so that was enough.
After doing all of that, I resolved to try to go to Chiba and Ibaraki afterwards. I figured that with Kanagawa and Tokyo likely all out, going to the outskirts would make more sense. However, there was an injury on one of the rails that threw everything off normal, and the train I found myself riding was bound for Utsunomiya instead. Seeing as how I was going to go there eventually, I rolled with it.
It doesn’t take too long to move away from Tokyo metropolitan area before you encounter more forest like areas and rice paddy fields. Halfway through the trip I noticed that two older women suddenly hopped off while the train was waiting to go to the next stop, and I followed them when I realized they found the express line. Utsunomiya has a substantial size to its area and buildings but it was very quiet on the streets there in midday. Walked a mile to Sega GIGO, found that they didn’t even have the goods tracker up. All out. Interesting buliding for it having several neon signs, all vintage and authentic at that. Getting to there from the south meant cutting through Saitama, so I knew I had enough time to make one last attempt there. Research shown two stores being near Oomiya station, so that’s where I ended up. Taito Station was immediately visible upon exit, and they have two IIDX machines specifically with 20 gram springs, which is closer to my home setup and that much lighter than standard 50 gram springs. The final hour drew near and I made one last visit to that city’s Round One. Unlike nearly every other place I went to so far, it only had one IIDX machine. However, and maybe because of that, their goods listing didn’t show everything as out. One painful language exchange later, I was able to discern that what I wanted was available. When you spend more than 3000 yen in a single credit, the game wants to verify if you really want to proceed. It does it again at 6000 and 9000. Yes, I really do. But, having made that money dump I was able to get my hands on the e-amuse card and poster with fifteen minutes left before the deadline. Mission complete. By this point in the day it was exceedingly difficult to even look at the screen so I was ready to come home, but not before getting some goods at the Oomiya Book Off and redeeming what I could for points at Round One Ikebukuro. By the end of the day the only thing that I could tolerate doing was to buy some chicken and nigiri from the nearby train station. Good enough. At that point in the day my body felt like it wants to rock back and forth after all the train riding done today. But, it ended up being worthwhile after all.
One nostalgic feeling I had the most strongly in the day was at the Utsunomiya location where the smell of it triggered past buried memories of yesteryear. I think I want to attribute it to the stronger second hand cigarette smell but I’m not sure - all the same I felt its presence strongly there. Also, I don’t see Oomiya (or really Saitama itself) mentioned as a fun place to go, but it might serve as an acceptable alternative to Ikebukuro, only not as massive in scale of human quantity. Depending on how the trip goes in total I may end up back there for IIDX playing, at least if I don’t find any other place that has 20G springs.
Day 3 - Akihabara
With the travels out of the way, it was time to keep things more regionalized and stick to one area, and there is shopping that needs to be done, so it was off to Akihabara and to see how much of other posted tales hold true. The answer is that it is a lot of it. Kotobukiya can stand to open sooner than noon. Super Potato is indeed priced for a market which wants to snap up anything cheap - I at least found Xi for under 500 and felt that it would have been a bit silly to buy only that, but it didn’t make spending 2000 on one single issue of Arcadia any better. I had no idea that Hey Arcade was right next to both of them; while it was assuredly nice to be there and see the row of Cave shooters among everything else, something got messed up with my registration of my new eamuse card with everything else, so that quickly added to my stress. Having to carry around a few hundred dollars worth of crap with every step didn’t help matters. At least I was able to help a person recover their lost phone by applying a bit of logic to the situation and deducing it to belong to the only person there who looked French, as it was on the Lock Screen. They were relieved, yes. Then, rain came, and it was more than I was anticipating, and I left the umbrella at the room, particularly since I knew I’d be shopping this day. It also turns out to have not mattered much, because I went to visit Bic Camera so that I could get myself a hair trimmer while here, and that turned into me finding a bunch of Kit Kats available, so that meant a second bag. The wind kicked out the rain and my umbrella. In trying to get as many gifts secured as possible, I found some gachapon, but it needed 100Y coins, and I didn’t need paper money in the trip yet. After fighting with maps, I found an ATM to get cash, and got the gachapon. I came home late with feeling rather crushed about the day in that I couldn’t take pictures very well with having to juggle weather and bagging considerations. There were some nice parts of the experience to be sure but between that and more gawking at Super Potato pricing ($135 for PS3 Caladrius? $6000 for Pulstar?) and seeing similar markups on other goods, I don’t think it’s unfair to say that there is a reputation that this area carries and the pricing is there to go with it.
Day 4 - Laundry Day. Shibuya, Harajuku, Shinjuku
I was so drained at the end of Day 3 that I fell asleep on the bed immediately after ending the night call, which meant that I woke up at 0200AM to a room that was fully lit. This meant that I needed to look up how to resolve my eamuse problem or else I wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep. I did both. Awake at 0800AM meant that I had time to do laundry while I figured out what to do with the rest of the day. This meant that I was able to get more of Sugamo in pictures, and it was nice to be able to walk among the actual residences, and do other things like come across a school as it was actually in session. With them being close by and all in succession, I figured to get Shibuya, Harajuku, and Shinjuku visited. It turns out to have been a good day for it, as the temperature was perfectly cool and no rain came, and the sun came out only for a little bit. Shibuya somehow doesn’t seem quite as large in scope in person but the crowds were definitely there, and it is much more hilly than I anticipated as well. After wandering around and not seeing any arcade for a bit, I came across a series of coffee and cookie shops and remained strong to not indulge. It was there while looking at a Disney store (which gets tourists to take pictures of it for some reason) that the song Alone Again came on through the nearby public speakers. What timing. It drove me to finally get a treat for myself, and the frozen latte (black sesame and houji) and croissant (dark chocolate filing) were certainly good, it ended up costing more than the dinner I’d have later this day. I found a seclusion with a garbage can to eat the food and not carry the trash around, then an arcade soon after, and it was time to determine if I could fix the problem. Just like an easy click, it was. New to trash. Old to new. Done. Why did it have to be this way. Harajuku came next, and the environment there was distinct. This one in particular felt like it was an extended carnival atmosphere with the single tight knit market street and emphasis on fashion. A conversation with a freelance artist in the subway actually went well enough that I didn’t feel dumb. The same sensation carried to Shinjuku as well, only it was more spread out. Kabuki street was interesting to see in person, and I didn’t get any unseemly vibes from the place. Maybe it’s different later at night. A return home at a reasonable time allowed me to go down Sugamo’s market street a bit; most of it was closed, but it was interesting to come across the few remaining stores that were open by 0800PM, and more so the one that wasn’t. Coming back to the hotel I found a 24 hour ramen shop with nobody inside. The chef didn’t want to speak and only pointed to the ordering kiosk when I addressed her. The food came through a slot in the obscured window. At least her thank you as I left was a bit more warm, and the food was certainly delicious. To match with the matcha dessert that I bought from Sugamo station, I swung by a 7Eleven to get a drink, and found a milk tea for cheaper than a vending machine. The overhead music in the store was an instrumental version of Alone Again.
Day 5. Ibaraki - Mount Tsukuba, Miraidaira. Kashiwa, Chiba. Akihabara 2.
Awake at 0500AM on my own and knowing the current forecast meant that my envisioned plan for the day was quickly realized. Reaching the Tsukuba Express starting point from Akihabara needs you to get very far down into the ground before getting out into sunlight. I was on the ride early enough to see schoolchildren going about their commute, some of them being no older than ten and going about it unaccompanied. The people of Tsukuba seemed to be particularly helpful and cheerful that day, even despite my Suica issues at the gate. I didn’t ask his name at the counter but the man at the service desk was eager to speak with me about my career and what I was doing there. One asked where I was from on the way up to the summit and another caught my cable car ticket on the way down. There had to have been a few of them who saw my doing this climb in my business attire and thinking me to be a complete idiot if not outright mocking them for doing it that way while they employed the use of dual walking sticks and the like. I know I read some reports of the home stretch being difficult, but it did get pretty close to being an actual rock climb instead of a trail hike for that part of it. A quick stop to Miraidaira on the way back to get the Ibaraki play. The way the town center greets you upon leaving the rail gate struck me as incredible, as well as for how quiet it was. It was like walking onto a movie set. I did find the sweet shop after the play, and that was another painful interaction yet again. Oh well. Two quick stops down Tsukuba Express and one across from Tobu Urban Park line was enough to have a toe in Chiba, and I didn’t even need to leave the physical building of the train station to get to the basement level to find a machine for a play. Thank you, Kashiwa, you were great. Gunma is all that’s left. The descent from Tsukuba did take some earnest exertion, and after doing that the two stops, that put me back in Akihabara about when I anticipated; what I failed to anticipate is how much that place seems to drain on me. I think I just need to eat at an actual dinner time. Once I got back to Sugamo and had food it was a bit better, but while in Akihabara and being around that environment, and not finding things on a shopping list, I found myself just standing still and watching life pass me by. I hemmed and hawed a while for a maid girl’s hour of service for chitchat, but eventually I talked myself out of it because I just didn’t want potential trouble, just like her name. Komaru. I thought about doing this once just to say that I did, but I ultimately decided against it. You cannot go to this place with the expectation that you will find anything unless it is advertised and new. If you are looking for anything used, don’t count on it being there. You also cannot go there without having a strong resolve to not engage with the touts, because it becomes disheartening to see them do their job and blankly stare at the world when they're forced to stand out there and do nothing. Back to Sugamo to find a place that advertised Wagyu but the price they wanted was more than I wanted to spend. The ramen and seaweed & rice servings were fine, but they advertised endless drink and I didn’t receive that. All for $20? No, son. I did better than that elsewhere, I’ll know better now. Long day.
Day 6 - Tokyo Flea Market, Nakano Broadway, Ueno.
The weather couldn’t have been better for this weekend. I’ve read reports that the flea market held near the horse race track will be arbitrarily cancelled regardless of what is reported on the website, but my gut instinct told me that it would occur today, and it did. Turns out that a flea market is a flea market which is a flea market, no matter where it happens. Same allotment of clothes and stuff that few people really want to buy, although I was able to find myself some neckties at least. I probably overpaid based on what I saw later in the route, but that’s fine. They look nice. I settled on some shot glasses for a gift as well, but I’m surprised that I can’t ind something ornate that isn’t part of a sake set. Seated in the shade with a chocolate churro while rap music played in the background - it’s like I never left home. A woman came to sit across from me for the sake of sitting down; she was from Holland and today’s her last day in the country. Her husband came with food eventually. She had three weeks here and went to several places (allegedly, she didn’t list them out) and I asked her about Nakano Broadway. She didn’t make it there. It’s a good thing that I did - this is probably the kind of environment and market that people expect of Akihabara now, and maybe that’s how Aki was years ago, but it’s different from this. What’s more interesting is that Mandarake has a larger presence here than in Akihabara (so it seems to me), and their stores had floor after floor of any and every kind of pop culture product that’s been made in the past sixty years at least. Buttress that with extensive watch and jewelry stores and a slender arcade in the basement, and it’s a very well centralized microcosm of the country’s economy on the whole. I actually made a point to have dinner earlier than usual this time and found a place to serve some deep fried pork cuts served with rice and soup on the side. It was enough, and very well made. The day had not ended and my bag was heavy with several books purchased there, so I reported back to base briefly and decided to try visiting somewhere else, and settled on Ueno. Just as I arrived, a festival was underway where local teams of people made an elaborate show of carrying a home made shrine to a temple. Streets were officially blocked by police to allow the procession. In following the line I came up against makeshift food and amusement stands with the traditional toy gun shooting and goldfish catching. It appears that this is an official “start of summer” festival and I was able to watch it all happen in front of me. That was the good part of the day.
Day 7 - Tachikawa / Kunitachi. Shinjuku 2.
One of the games that I've never played is Beatmania III The Final. I've played some BM3 7th Mix years ago, but not The Final. I found a location that has one - World Game Circus in Tachikawa. In looking around that area before the trip, I saw that there was a nearby shinkansen museum, and not much else, so I figured that going to both places would make that walk worthwhile. Turns out that it wasn’t a museum in the proper sense of a dedicated building. Rather, it was a bullet train engine car on the side of a building that was unrelated, and that was it. A cute interaction happened here - when I approached the car, I heard some children running around inside, so I approached cautiously without knowing if I was encroaching upon someone else's alloted time or something. Once the children saw me, they gave a hearty irrashaimase as I entered, and the boy stamped a paper and presented it to me. Perfect. Despite it not being a typical musem, the card did have some interesting content, and it's good to see some kind of commemoration for their achievements and progression in that industry regardless. They have a lot to be proud about there. Off to WGC. Maps wasn’t lying about the walk taking twenty minutes. It's a good thing that I looked it up on streetview beforehand, because I otherwise would have walked right past it without knowing it was there. Then there it was, and there I confronted a past that I couldn’t visit again. Sure, I got to play BM3 The Final at last, but my timing was off, my hands were off, there wasn’t much I could do. Along with that I can say that I’ve played on a Beatmania II cabinet, and that was better than 5th Style at least. But that was it, that was all I could stand to do. It was right there and I couldn’t bear to put up with it more than a few rounds at best. Dream big, because only disappointment follows if your smaller dreams ever are fulfilled. I don’t know why finding IKEA back in Shinjuku was so difficult, but it took a while. I bought a bag, and then I bought a bag because the other bag was at the end of the register, which makes sense. I did feed myself before getting back to the Taito station to play some songs, but it still wasn’t good enough. All thumbs. Ended the day with laundry since the timing worked. Speaking of making dreams big, it’s time to cross another one off the list tomorrow. I can’t wait.
Day 8 - Takasaki, Gunma. Oomiya, Saitama 2.
It’s a good thing that I only needed to get to Ikebukuro to transfer over to the next stop, because that’s where that particular run ended for some reason. I wonder what was up. Speaking of things getting messed up on trains, I managed to find my way on a train that needed a separate ticket, which I didn't have. The conductor found me right away and had me disembark at Uraja for me to wait for the proper transfer. The weather forecast said there’d be rain, and the travel forecast said it would take two hours to get there, and neither lied. I feel like I had more people staring at me in Gunma than other places. I will say that I found the Takasaki station area to be rather charming, with the stores that it had inside and the emphasis on the music culture there. It’s one thing to offer a piano to the public to play, but it’s another to have a public willing to use it. This location had both. Having what was essentially a Bic Camera built into the facility was a nice touch too. The Leisure Land arcade was sandwiched between other floors that had its own offering of gaming stuff, so that was an unexpected bit of a fun thing to look through. The area was clean and sparsely populated, and it wasn’t picked clean of all matter of things that would normally get snapped up, so that was interesting. Finally, I made it over to the machine. They had separate fans for each location. I got the songs and then the medals came, and that’s that. Kantou Seiou. I would have stayed a bit longer but I wanted to have the medals show up right away, and my internet wasn’t cooperating, so that’s all I could do. I think there was an Internet cafe that I could have used in the facility, but I didn’t want to deal with an awkward conversation. I did get some Lawson on the way out, as well as some trinkets from the local Gunma-chan store as well as some mini croissants and some macademia cookie things. More vocal awkwardness. Omiya was one of the stops on the way back, and I found a place to serve omrice, so that’s another one off the list. No shoes allowed inside. The value wasn’t there but the service was good enough, as was the flavor. The machines with the 20G springs are indeed legit. Back home in time for some McDonalds, and that’s another food-checklist item marked off. Takoyaki mayo dipping sauce - somehow it’s both salty and sweet. While returning to the hotel, I did happen to encounter an argument amongst two teenaged locals where the guy ended up half-heartedly kicking the girl and getting her to cry. I wonder what their argument was about. I didn’t play hero, but someone else did so enough to prevent an escalation and called the police over.
Day 9 - Sugamo, Tokyo Sky Tree, Akihabara 3, Kanda
Up early enough to decide that I should at least visit the Sky Tree while I'm there just to say that I did, and that I should visit the Sugamo street market upon its open since it was right there in front of me. I'm glad to have done so. With everything open, this felt more like what one would think to expect from a flea market environment that's operated and supported by the local populace. Small stores were open both sides of the street that go on for many blocks, and some tents and tables were set up to sell second hand goods as well. I was able to find someone selling a US Morgan dollar and he wanted only 2000Y for it, so that was an easy buy. If I would have known better to anticipate this area, I wouldn't have felt compelled to buy kitchy tourist crap that is expected as gifts elsewhere. If you are looking for a place to idly shop around that doesn't get extremely crowded and has an authentic local feel to it, consider making a point to come here. Off to Sky Tree. Getting the combo ticket for the second deck was worth it just for the lack of crowds on the upper area. If you're going to come here, consider getting a phone selfie stick or something of the kind so that you can take pictures against the windows without the structure scaffolding obstructing your view. On the subject of shopping again, this might be another area to consider visiting just for the sake of the specialty stores to be found here, such as those for chopsticks or hairpins. To close out the day, my wife reminded me to look for something from the Square Enix cafe, so that meant swinging by Akihabara yet again. Since it is within a walkway, it was a bit of a pain to find this place even with using maps, but I eventually found it and got what she wanted to find. Played some IIDX at Game Panic, which was surprisingly small and the one machine that was avaialble to play had some 2P turntable issues, so that didn't last all that long. Dinner was at a nearby place that specalized in tofu, so that was a good ramen serving with that infused. For the evening, I wandered south to Kanda to get night pictures, and found it to feel pretty similar to Ueno.
Day 10 - Ginza, Tokyo, Kanda & Akihabara 4
Launrdry in the morning. I also wanted to say that I went to Ginza in my time here, and I didn't research anywhere to go to keep it a surprise. It was a bit warmer and sunnier than usual that day, and I stuck to the main road for most of the walk, so I can't say that I found too many points of the interest along the path that I walked starting from Yurakucho station and heading out that way. High class store for high class people, and that's too rich for my peasant blood. Similarly for Tokyo proper itself, I suppose I'd have to needed to wander far away from the Yamanote vicinity to find points of interest there, as I didn't encounter anything that was remarkably distinctive here in comparison to other areas that I have previously seen. Continuing north across Nihonbashi brought me to Kanda and eventually to Akihabara yet again, as if it was a magnet that pulled me inside every time. For the sake of trying a different place I chose to play some IIDX at the Leisure Land arcade there, and I'm glad to have done that, as those machines were probably in the best coniditon that I encountered within that area. Dinner was at Tenkaippin, which I didn't realize until after I placed the order was cash only. The clerk didn't request it beforehand but I voluntarily left my passport there to show that I would return, and promptly went to the same ATM that I had found days prior in order to get the cash to pay for the bill.
Day 11 - Haneda T3, Nishi Nippori, Nippori, Uguisuidani, Otsuka, Shibuya, Shinjuku, Ikebukruo, home.
The end. I resolved to take the subway over to Haneda today to get the one luggage over there and stored, and it’s a good thing that I did - there’s no easy solution for getting over there without encountering a crowd. If anything I wonder if Yamanote is actually better. Regardless, I got that much done. With the day left to go, I ventured to Nishi Nippori and I needed to summon the map several times to make sure I found the location, as it was as obscure as it could get. Just a sign on the ground for the third floor, a stairway that led to the back, an elevator that had no decoration, a single room that housed everything. Arcade PCB kits on shelves, joystick panels in exposed boxes, nicotine odor from years past - it was like I was transported to 1995 upon entry, beyond the fact that the games weren’t as old. Most of them, they did have a lot going for SF3 3rd yet. I was able to take care of some game business in a hurry since I was the only one there. It was a very pleasant respite for play in comparison to most of the other sessions. The region itself felt much the same as this arcade - old and well worn, as in well lived. Venturing south to Nippori led me to stumble upon a shrine and cemetery just by following some stairs. Usuigudani was cleaner but mostly had hotels as points of interest. Back home to buy some mochi while mochi was for sale in midday. Then to Otsuka, thinking that I would wander to Ikebukuro, but I ended up wandering back to Sugamo instead. Whoops. Meal at Sugamo, then back out to return to Shibuya and Shinjuku at night to catch evening shots, when I hadn’t done so before at these places. Good thing I did that to get Golden Gai area shots at night. With the night winding down, I decided to have one last IIDX play at Round 1 in Ikebukuro to symbolically end where I started.
Ending arcade comments
· Although the upkeep is generally better and more consistent than the US, some machines will have hardware issues here too. I was surprised by the blurriness with some of the LM IIDX machines.
· Densha De Go on the propert large cabinet is nice but quickly becomes very expensive.
· Bombergirl is OK enough and having the dedicated detonator button that pops up for hitting the base is a cute touch.
· Chase Chase Jokers feels rather clunky and I'm not sure what the game is trying to do. Interesting side screen concept at least.
· Nostalgia is delightful and would probably find a small fanbase worldwide if it had more exposure.
· Favorite IIDX locations are Taito Station in Oomiya for the light keys and Leisure Land Akihabara for the high quality of the LMs there. Honorable mention goes to the Game Versus loctation in Nishi Nihonbashi, but that might not be worth it for a dedicated trip unless you go there first thing in the morning.
Ending overall comments
This was a life altering trip for me, as would be expected. While I'm glad to have made the journey, as to be expected, I will only want to return after making an extensive redoubled effort into speaking and hearing comprehension, because I know that I came across like a blubbering idiot so many times, and it's truly aggravating because I generally know what I want to say and most of the words that are used to say it, but it just doesn't come out of my mouth properly when it needs to be done.
I welcome any questions you may have, as that will help for me to recall the memories and have me write them down.