Wonka sweet tart game

I've been playing the welcome playlist with a friend and every match has been remarkably fair, balanced and close.
The SBMM avoids the main mistake present in other games and doesn't overcompensate, instead bumping you up or down in ranking only slightly. It's little enough that there's no sudden feeling of the scales being tipped, but it's also enough that you get to a sweet spot quickly and then face an appropriately altered challenge every time there's a change.
My win/loss ratio is 1.7, which seems relatively fair to me, and my K/D is 1.0, which is as fair as it gets. Most of the direct, one on one fights also ended with the survivor being 1-2 shots from death, which is a compliment to both the SBMM and the weapon balancing.
Our entire ~3 hour session today was the most fun I've had in a FPS in years. I'm blown away by how well optimised this SBMM system is, especially since it isn't implemented all round. I almost feel like it's a waste to not have it in unranked, at least as an option.
I'd love to hear all your thoughts.

Its Bocing time yo. I've thought for a long time that Boc is in some way related to the marika radagon story- he shares a love of sewing like radagon, he talks expressly about his mother, and lets be honest the main (bad) mother figure in the game is Marika/Radagon. Finally Melina even spares Boc of all people a little dialogue. I think Boc's story is an allusion to the core metaphysics of the gods. Its not that he is literally Marika's son, its that his/his mother's experience may parallel hers.
In light of Marika(?) pulling some golden thread out of somewhere, lets pull some Boc quotes out and think about how they may be describing the true heart of the story
1
I was pushed out of the cave. Told not to come back, not ever. Then I ended up as a tree. Lucky you came along, really.
Well urm ive recently seen a lot of corpses that ended up as a tree, and in a sense Marika ended up as a tree only to be 'saved' by us.
2
'My mum was a seamstress...and that sewing kit was all I had to remember her by. I always wanted to be just like sweet old Mum. Then, I suppose I-I can't just curl up and die, can I?"'
Huh i know a mothefather who appears to be playing with thread...
3
I'll be the golden seamster, Boc! Now I'll be able to sew anything, even the threads of the demigods!"
When you say you can sew anything boc, does that include conjoining all of reality? Because i think your mother figure might have been in the business of literally sewing reality together.
4
"Oh! Oh! It can't be... For my rebirth? But these are precious, are you certain that it's for me? Oh... M'lord how did you know? It was my only wish, that I might honour you with a decent appearance."
Did your mother change appearance at all Boc? Did she change from something ugly to a beautiful queen? Was she reborn like the description on the https://eldenring.wiki.fextralife.com/Shield+of+the+Guilty
I expect Boc's dialogue to start making a lot more sense when we see what happened to Marika in the land of shadows.

Hi there! my names Sugar, and I'm a plus-size soft-dom!
I'm 22, full of life and fully prepared to take on any clingy subs who needs a sweet dom to soothe their hearts and wallets. Especially those who love a princess on the chubbier side. 👑
I love video games, anime and actually making a connection with my subs. Given enough time I can see us being friends and talking about life. I'm not here just to drain you, I'm here to build a connection and understand you but that doesn't mean I'm a push over.
I'm into
Breeding Cnc Edging Ass worship Praise Begging
I'm fine with low senders even I understand a subs struggles. Tributes are welcomed but not enforced. If we hit things off and you pay, we'll keep talking, if not I'll just block you.
Please, don't be shy when messaging me unlike most I don't bite, unless you want me to. 💞

Hello everyone. My name is Michael. I'm an empathetic person that loves gaming, animals, going for walks, and cooking (Let me cook for you). I'm pretty happy on my own already but I need someone to farm materials in games for me you know? Sure I have an awesome kitty to spend time with; But she just can't do that! I've tried to teach her! But yeah, I want someone I can make breakfast in bed for, go grocery shopping with, game with, and just do cute stuff together.
Pictures below to see if I'm your type or not:
It me: https://imgur.com/a/CBLxCCx
Another one: https://imgur.com/a/pkIFNOy
Me with the best kitty: https://imgur.com/a/yNxmC9y
Gaming kitty: https://imgur.com/a/TDQvhYz
In relationships I really value communication and effort. I make a big effort to show the person I'm with that they're special to me and I try my best to look at things from their viewpoint. I'm very emotionally available and hope to find someone that is as well and doesn't have commitment issues.
As to what I'm looking for. I'm looking for someone sweet, someone that loves animals, someone that likes to joke/banter around, someone that enjoys voicecalls and listening to some idiot (me) do random accents at her.
Since gaming is my main hobby, these are the games I'm currently playing:

• Palworld
  
• League
  
• Path of Exile
  
• TFT
  
• Overwatch
  

I'm open to playing pretty much anything together though.
Anywho, I'm aiming to keep this pretty short. If my face appeals to you or you're trying to lose in some games together then just say hello! and we'll go from there
Hope to hear from you and thanks for reading =~)

Hello everyone. My name is Michael. I'm an empathetic person that loves gaming, animals, going for walks, and cooking (Let me cook for you). I'm pretty happy on my own already but I need someone to farm materials in games for me you know? Sure I have an awesome kitty to spend time with; But she just can't do that! I've tried to teach her! But yeah, I want someone I can make breakfast in bed for, go grocery shopping with, game with, and just do cute stuff together.
Pictures below to see if I'm your type or not:
It me: https://imgur.com/a/CBLxCCx
Another one: https://imgur.com/a/pkIFNOy
Me with the best kitty: https://imgur.com/a/yNxmC9y
Gaming kitty: https://imgur.com/a/TDQvhYz
In relationships I really value communication and effort. I make a big effort to show the person I'm with that they're special to me and I try my best to look at things from their viewpoint. I'm very emotionally available and hope to find someone that is as well and doesn't have commitment issues.
As to what I'm looking for. I'm looking for someone sweet, someone that loves animals, someone that likes to joke/banter around, someone that enjoys voicecalls and listening to some idiot (me) do random accents at her.
Since gaming is my main hobby, these are the games I'm currently playing:

• Palworld
  
• League
  
• Path of Exile
  
• TFT
  
• Overwatch
  

I'm open to playing pretty much anything together though.
Anywho, I'm aiming to keep this pretty short. If my face appeals to you or you're trying to lose in some games together then just say hello! and we'll go from there
Hope to hear from you and thanks for reading =~)

In my current game, a PC and an npc have a blossoming relationship. So far they have got to the point where they have done a small check peck. I know it will make narrative sense to continue roleplaying this romance (it is very sweet)
My only problem is - I don't know how to roleplay romance very well! (I'm asexual and I've never been in a long-term relationship) Any advice with how to realistically and comfortably develop this romance would be appreciated!

Just another day more in my journey to find my half even if im starting to lose hope on this with each day that passes away 🥹
My name is Vlad, I'm 22 years old, and I currently live in Spain. I really enjoy video games, anime (I started watching it a few months ago as I was having a really hard time, and it's helping me a lot), listening to music, and working out at the gym (it's helping me a lot with my stress and my feelings), animals ( i have one dog and one cat) and martial arts. I also like more things, but I can't remember them all, so you can ask me if you want 😊.
About my looks, I can say that I have long black hair (Viking style, I think), I'm around 5'10"-5'12" tall, and I have an average body, but I'm changing that with the gym. I don't have any problem sending selfies or even voice notes, so feel free to ask about it.
About my personality, I can say that I'm a very sweet and caring person and will always give you lots of love and affection, but I need to feel that from your side too. I love to spend time together, so doing voice chats, sleep calls, or video calls its nice with me 😊 (I will adapt to your preferences, but for me, doing those is just a form of love).
A bit about me: I'm currently doing a cybersecurity degree that I will finish in a few months, and then I will start working on whatever job I can find to start saving some money, hopefully with the idea of going to live with my soulmate and be happy together.
I'm also a person who had a really bad time this last months (you are free to ask me about anything about me, I'm an open book), so I need to feel loved and cared for, and I love to be pampered in that sense. I will never say no to any kind of affection you show me.
Please im looking for something serious so just message if you are willing to put effort in the relationship. Also if you could send a picture It would be perfect (i want to see with Who im talking and well we need to see if we both feel attracted to eachother). Of course i Will send a picture too.
If you read this far thank you and i hope we can meet and see where everything goes 😊

Just another day more in my journey to find my half even if im starting to lose hope on this with each day that passes away 🥹
My name is Vlad, I'm 22 years old, and I currently live in Spain. I really enjoy video games, anime (I started watching it a few months ago as I was having a really hard time, and it's helping me a lot), listening to music, and working out at the gym (it's helping me a lot with my stress and my feelings), animals ( i have one dog and one cat) and martial arts. I also like more things, but I can't remember them all, so you can ask me if you want 😊.
About my looks, I can say that I have long black hair (Viking style, I think), I'm around 5'10"-5'12" tall, and I have an average body, but I'm changing that with the gym. I don't have any problem sending selfies or even voice notes, so feel free to ask about it.
About my personality, I can say that I'm a very sweet and caring person and will always give you lots of love and affection, but I need to feel that from your side too. I love to spend time together, so doing voice chats, sleep calls, or video calls its nice with me 😊 (I will adapt to your preferences, but for me, doing those is just a form of love).
A bit about me: I'm currently doing a cybersecurity degree that I will finish in a few months, and then I will start working on whatever job I can find to start saving some money, hopefully with the idea of going to live with my soulmate and be happy together.
I'm also a person who had a really bad time this last months (you are free to ask me about anything about me, I'm an open book), so I need to feel loved and cared for, and I love to be pampered in that sense. I will never say no to any kind of affection you show me.
Please im looking for something serious so just message if you are willing to put effort in the relationship. Also if you could send a picture It would be perfect (i want to see with Who im talking and well we need to see if we both feel attracted to eachother). Of course i Will send a picture too.
If you read this far thank you and i hope we can meet and see where everything goes 😊

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Sadly, The Thunderbolts are eliminated. However, I am not released from the task of making blogs. It is finally the Chocolatiers’ time to be front and center. Welcome to week 13 of Marble Survival and welcome to the first of at least 2 Chocolate Columns. New format, new publication, Let's Go!
Chocolate Column 1: A Sweet Start
Race 85:
A strong start to the week with a 2nd place finish. Bonbon bid their time in the start and was able to get aggressive down the stretch to snag a superb start.
Race 86:
After a little “lateral movement” in the starting blocks, Bonbon comes home in 6th. At the halfway mark, Bonbon sits 3rd overall and 9 points ahead of Yellah. We should be safe, but a decent finish will just about seasl the deal.
Other News:
In other news, what a recovery by Aryp to win the second race. After being bullied by the fidget spinner, Aryp stormed their way back and wowed the crowd. You could hear many of the eliminated teams’ fans cheering for the comeback as it happened.
Something that hasn’t been talked about too much, certainly not on this blog, is how well Swax and Slimelime have done to this point. Being reserves, you must think that a promotion to the main rotation is on the cards. Think of how many captains and other top marbles they have beaten out.
Yellah is in grave danger. 3 points away from Slimelime, they need to finish at least 5th to have a shot at survival.
Swax is set to move on with any halfway decent result tomorrow. Awesome to see dominance even now.
Short and Sweet is the name of the game for The Chocolate Column. Bonbon looks set to survive but anything can happen in this wild event so stay tuned!

The Traveler (Aether) is either a Nameless and his sibling (Lumine) is a receptacle for a Stellaron that is part of Teyvat. The Stellaron having been part of Teyvat for thousands of years.
What we know from Honkai Star Rail (HSR) so far:

• A Nameless follows the Path of the Trailblaze. Venturing the stars in the name of Akivili and the path of the Trailblaze, repairing with great difficulty the star rail contaminated by the unknown cancer. The unknown cancer here being Stellarons. They would often disguise the moving Express as the trail of a shooting star, just like how the Traveler and his sibling arrived on Teyvat.
• Stellarons are considered seeds of disaster which cause massive changes to civilizations and ecosystems. Teyvat's world is affected by the Abyss, perhaps due to the effects of the Stellaron.
• On Jarilo VI, it was responsible for the Eternal Freeze and had corrupted the Supreme Guardian.
• On the Xianzhou Loufu, it was used to bring about the self-destruction of the Xianzhou, Phantylia using the revived Ambrosial Arbor to create a physical body for herself, and fought the Astral Express crew with her new body.
• On Penacony, its influence would linger within the Dreamscape and tempt people with indulgence and pleasure, using their minds as nourishment for the sweet dream.
• Stellaron Hunter, Kafka, implanted a Stellaron within a receptacle that became the main protagonist of Honkai Star Rail, the Trailblazer (Stelle/Caelus).
• We also know that the former Nameless could choose to leave the Astral Express at any time and some had passed on.

What we know from Genshin Impact (GI) so far:

• The Primordial One is the progenitor god who allegedly came to Teyvat from another world. Perhaps he brought along a Stellaron.
• 500 years before the current events of GI, a cataclysm and the fall Khaenriah occured, revolving around the encroachment of the Abyss — an otherworldly power at odds with Celestia's power — and the destruction of Khaenri'ah, a nation that lived without the influence of the gods.
• The siblings "arrived" to Teyvat in the form of shooting stars.
• Aether is a descender and not of Teyvat while Lumine is not a descender and originates from Teyvat.

So here's the explanation;

• The Primordial One came to Teyvat and brought along a Stellaron with him to f*ck around.
• This caught the attention of the Nameless, who descended upon Teyvat with a Receptacle, made in his image like a sibling, to seal the Stellaron. Upon leaving Celestia, they were confronted by the Heavenly Principles and the Receptacle, Lumine, was taken away before a seal was placed on Aether by the Heavenly Principles.

"Some kind of seal was cast upon me, and I lost my power. So while we used to travel from world to world, we are now trapped here." - Traveler

• Shortly after, the cataclysm occured. Khaenrians who sought to draw power from the Stellaron instead of depending on the influence and powers of the gods caused the destruction of Khaenri'ah. The Stellaron then feel into the hands of Celestia.
• 500 years later, Aether wakes up.
• Aether doesn't know how long he had been sealed but when he awoke, all he knew was that he had to find his sibling.
• In the meantime, Lumine, that had the Stellaron sealed in her, had been influenced by it, just like Cocolia was on Jarilo VI. She became part of the Abyss Order which seeks to destroy the nations of Teyvat.
• The Stellaron having been part of Teyvat since the Primordial One is the reason why Lumine isn't regarded as a Descender as she is the embodiment of the Stellaron.

TL:DR
Aether is a Nameless that came to Teyvat to seal a Stellaron within a Receptacle made in his image but like a sister but ended up stranded on Teyvat with a Stellaron on the loose.
Perhaps, this was a solo mission by Aether and the Astral Express members assumed that he was MIA or left.
Teyvat is in a Jarilo VI and Penacony situation.
P.S. details from what we know so far, unless in italic, is official lore from the games or wiki.

Intro: For your distinguished service to the crown, you’ve been assigned the difficult and dangerous job of slaying a dragon purported to have slaughtered a village on the outskirts of the kingdom. It’s a job you should be able to handle, and you’re not too scared… now, if only the whole thing felt less wrong…
Summary: Listener meets a new acquaintance who befriends her, and offers to guide her where she needs to go. They face a danger together, and she learns that he is not what he seems.
Go ahead and monetize, it's fine. Word count is about 3800.
If you fill this or plan to fill this, please notify me. Please don't make edits without asking first.
TWs: Running deception, combat, discussion of mass murder (dragon burning places to the ground), possessiveness, forced sleep
Line breaks represent the listener talking or space where no one talks and should be short pauses, words within {brackets} represent the speaker’s tone or sfx. At ellipses, the speaker trails off, and at dashes, he is either cut off abruptly by the listener or by himself.
Author’s Note: And also the flipped version, for the draconic gentlemen out there!
If you want to read this somewhere other than Reddit, it's also here.
F4M version here.
​
​
{internal monologue} {disgusted} Ugh, those damn livestock merchants charge more every time. Gouging bastards, {rationalization} but I do need them to stay silent. If the town finds out how much food I have to purchase every month, it’ll only end badly. Besides, it’s not like even this much bribery makes a dent in my hoard. I should really just be glad I haven’t met any merchants with integrity, that wouldn’t end well. Good thing it’s a vanishingly rare trait these days… {annoyance} wait, no, that’s not a good thing, what am I saying? It’s sad… but it does make my life easier. Well, that’s a hell of a conundrum. {sigh} {bored} Not one I haven’t dealt with before, though. Have this conversation with myself every time. Oh, well. What matters is the food’ll be delivered soon, I don’t have to go into hibernation, and the merchants won’t talk. Anything else I wanted to do before heading home? Hmm… I think I wanted to stop at the spice merchant, see how much- {interest} HELlo. Who is that?
{curiosity} What would a knight be doing here? I mean, I suppose the goblin raids have been getting more brazen, but the town guards seem to have it handled, I haven’t even needed to get involved yet. I guess she could be here about that, but it doesn’t feel right. Maybe she’s just passing through? Well, best way to find out is to go talk to-
{quiet} Oh, damn. That’s- oh, damn. Fuck, she’s hot. {forced calm} Okay, composure. You are an all-powerful dragon. You will not be thrown off your game by one mortal, no matter how shiny her armor is. And it’s only her armor you’ll be looking at, right? Right. Ignore that beautiful face, you just need to find out what she’s doing here, not-
{suspicious} Wait. Who’s she talking to? {upset} The spice merchant? And he’s BLUSHING? Uh-uh. No. Not gonna fly.
{out loud} {sickly sweet} Hiiiii, hello! It’s me again, I’m here to pick up some- Oh? Who’s this? A new friend?
Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were having a conversation. Please, continue. I can wait.
{cough}
Oh, no, don’t mind me, just looking at… cumin. My, this smells awfully strong.
So sorry to barge in again, uh, I would like to buy these.
Are you leaving? Well, it was lovely to meet you.
{internal monologue} Okay, let me just finish up here, and I can go talk to her.
{pleased} Hah! Look frustrated, spice sleazeball. Serves you right. {confused} Wait, do I know your name? Have I ever asked your name? Eh, doesn’t matter right now, I don’t need to know everyone in the village. {disgust} Especially not someone who flirts with- {confusion} Wait, what am I doing? I don’t have any claim over some random knight, why am I acting like this?
{frustrated noise} Figure out internal dilemma later, find human now. Where’d she go?
Agh! Curse this mortal form’s short legs, I can’t see- wait! Shiny!
{out loud} Hey! Hey! Wait up!
{out of breath} Whew… Thought I was gonna… gonna lose you… for a minute.
Thanks. Only need… a few seconds…
{composed} Hi. I’m Typhon*.* Sorry to chase after you like that, but I realized I didn’t catch your name?
Oh, that’s a lovely name. It suits you.
{pleased} Oh, flatterer. {internal monologue} She’s smooth, isn’t she? I was expecting all armor, no brain. I understand why the spice merchant was blushing now, I guess. {out loud} I just wanted to ask you… uh, I wanted to ask you what you were doing at the spice merchant’s? Usually passers-through don’t stop there when they can get their salt cheaper elsewhere.
Oh, that’s interesting! I didn’t know you could find that here.
Oh, no, I don’t spend very much time there. I mostly go in, buy what I need for my next few weeks of meals, and leave. Other places to be. More important places.
{laugh} Well. You certainly know the way to a man’s heart. {internal monologue} A knight with both manners and a sense of humor… who’d have thought?
{out loud} Wonderful. So, what brings you to Wylgrith? It’s not a large settlement by any means, and well out of the way of… everything, really. What reason would a mighty royal knight have for stopping by? Were you sent to handle the goblins that-
{stunned} …Say what now?
The dragon? You were sent to kill the DRAGON?
Can you… not?
{off-balance} I mean- uh- Well, I don’t see why you would, do I? After all, the dragon hasn’t been seen or heard from in years, right? And even before that he didn’t harm any humans for decades. He-
I- uhhh… I guess I’m guessing he’s a ‘he?’ I did see him once, flying overhead, though, and he looked like a boy dragon. Kind of stocky.
I… suppose ‘it’ works as well, yeah. {quiet, sad} A little hurtful, though…
{back on track} Nothing, nothing. So, why are you killing the dragon, again? I don’t think… it… has even harmed a human in living memory.
{sputtering} What? No it didn’t!
I- I think I would know if it burned down a village. I mean, this place is still standing, right?
A different- Well, I’m sure he wouldn’t have done anything like-
{quickly} No, no, I don’t know. It’s not like I’ve met the thing, right? But it hasn’t burned down this village, so why would-
{tentative} Oh. They said that?
Right to the king?
Right in the middle of court, where everyone could hear it?
{sad} I guess that settles that, then. The dragon needs to die.
{internal monologue} Damn. What a waste of such a beautiful knight. There’s no chance she could possibly beat me on her own, so she’s going to end up- wait, on her own?
{out loud} {confused} And the king sent you? Alone, I mean? No army, or squad of knights, or cadre of mages? Why would he do that?
{awed} Oh. Oh, that is a very magic sword.
Well, no, I haven’t. But- but you can just tell, can’t you? It’s glowing! And it’s covered in some kind of weird letters, those have to be magical, right?
{internal monologue} {hesitant} Okay. That’s somewhat worrying. Even with all the useless sigils and that pointless glow siphoning its energy, I can feel the power rippling off that thing. Where did she ever find- No, that doesn’t matter. Could it level the playing field? Give her a chance? Hard to tell, I think, my senses in this form aren’t as-
{out loud} I’m sorry, what? I was distracted. Uh- it’s a very pretty sword.
{taken aback} That’s- that’s a good name for it. Very dangerous-sounding.
{internal monologue}{stressed} ARE YOU KIDDING ME? FANGBANE? SHE FOUND FANGBANE? HOW IN THE- {forced composure} no, I’m calm, I’m calm, it’s fine. It’s not worrying at all that she has the most dangerous dragon-slaying sword ever forged. Wow, this very quickly went from “I don’t want to fight her, I don’t want to kill her” to “I don’t want to fight her, I don’t want to die.” Okay, time to nip this in the bud.
{out loud} Wow, it’s done that much? I never would’ve guessed that, it looks much too fancy for that. So… you can actually kill the dragon?
{hesitant} You’re right, I suppose. If it burned a village, it does deserve that. Well… *{resolve}*Do you know how to find its lair?
No, it’s not. If it was, everyone would be constantly in there robbing the hoard, wouldn’t we? Everyone knows that the lair is somewhere on the mountain, but no one knows where.
{triumph} Yes. Except me. And I’ll guide you there.
{reasonable} We already agreed, right? If it burned down a village, killed that many people, it needs to be put down. I want to help with that, and besides, you need someone to take you there. You’ll never find it on your own, so you can’t be too choosy about who you bring, can you?
I like hiking, and the mountain isn’t dangerous if you’ve known what you were doing since you were a child. I found it once, but I ran immediately, because I didn’t want to risk angering the dragon. I think I can find it again, but it’ll be a long trip. Three days at minimum.
{internal monologue} {satisfied} Perfect. A few days wandering in the forest should discourage her, maybe I can even convince her I didn’t burn any village. {confused} Why would she have been told… {moving on} Doesn’t matter right now. What matters is getting her off my trail, and maybe getting to know her in the meantime… {upset} No! Stop that! Bad Typhon! She’s literally trying to kill you. She is not a prospective mate, she isn’t even another dragon!
{sigh} {wistful} She is gorgeous, though, especially when the light catches her armor like that… No! Stop!
{out loud} {serious} We should set out soon, then. Do you have enough provisions for the trip?
Good, good. No time to waste, come on.
You’re hunting a dragon. A dragon. Don’t you think it might be wise to move before he- it catches wind of your presence?
Let’s go, then.
{some indicator of a time skip}
{amused} What, don’t tell me you’re getting tired? We’ve only been hiking for a couple hours today, aren’t you supposed to be a big, strong knight?
You could take off the armor, if it’s that hot.
{concession} All right, your decision. And I suppose wearing the armor was helpful when the tangler tree tried to grab you. Fine, we’ll stop for a bit.
How much is left in your waterskin?
Good, good. Mine’s pretty full, I haven’t felt thirsty in a while.
No, we’re definitely going in the right direction. {grasping at straws} I recognize… uh, that rock! Yeah. See how it kinda looks like a bear, if you tilt your head?
Really? Well, I see it. Anyway, I remember seeing that before. We’re about a day’s walk away from the lair, I’m almost certain.
You know, you never asked why I decided to hike in a random direction for three days. {internal monologue} {pleased} I have such a good story for it, too. It’ll leave you crying, and then maybe I can-
{out loud} {taken aback} You do?
What? You’re a royal knight, one of the most honored positions in the land. Why would you feel the need to escape?
{internal monologue} What? What was that? There for a second and then gone, was that… a crack in the charming exterior?
{out loud} No, no, I understand the feeling. I just… didn’t expect it from this quarter. Is something wrong at court? Are you-
{inner monologue} {protective} Oh… Oh her eyes… So sad… What did they do to you, my knight?
{out loud} Please, anything you can-
{confused} What? What’s wrong?
No, I’m not going to shush, we’re talking, and-
{muffled} Mmph! MMMMPH!
{inner monologue} {angy} This presumptuous human dares lay her hand on ME? I don’t care what might be inside her, I’m going to make it outside- {considering} Wait. What’s that noise?
That doesn’t sound like- oh. Oh, those are goblins. And she wanted me to be quiet, and now they heard us, and- oops. Why did I not sense them coming? Goblins wouldn’t know stealth if it snuck up behind them and ripped their legs off, I should’ve heard them from miles away. This doesn’t make any sense… Oh, well. I suppose it doesn’t matter, in the grand scheme of things. Just a few more goblins to kill. If she’d just let go of me… wait, but I don’t want to reveal myself. That makes this much more difficult. Can I kill all these green idiots in my human form? {concerned} Oh, wow, that’s… a worrying amount. Where are they all coming from? All right, I think I can take- wait, what? Human? What are you doing?
{out loud} Why are you getting in front of me? That is far too many goblins for any human to handle, we need to run!
{internal monologue} {flustered} Wha? What does she mean by that? And why does she have to be this lovely as she says it? That’s unfair!
{out loud} No- you can’t-
{internal monologue} {upset} Oh, the stupid, brave, self-sacrificial idiot! She’s gonna get herself killed if I don’t help her- wait, what?
{taken aback} She’s- oh, wow, that’s quite impressive. That’s- wow. I’ve never seen a human fight like that.
{confused} Huh? Why’s she looking back… Is she angry? What?
She’s yelling something… She wants me to run? Wha- {realization} OHHHHH- She thinks I’m in danger, and she’s trying to protect me! She wants to- {touched} aw. That’s the sweetest thing… My heart- {serious} I need to keep this knight alive.
{realization} Oh! I have to pretend to be running, yes. I can’t help her here, much as I want to. Besides, it looks like she has it handled. Those goblins aren’t laying a claw on her, somehow. Guess it was a good decision to wear the armor.
{planning} I’ll come back for her later, and she can be happy that she kept me safe, and maybe I can use that to find out what’s wrong with her, oh, looks like she’s just about finished with those- {shock} wut.
What is that.
That’s a- that’s a freaking hellhound! What in the Low Realms is a hellhound doing here?
{protective} Okay, no, unacceptable. I am not risking my treasure- {concerned} the human. The human! Why did I just think of her as- never mind, time for that later.
{whoosh sfx}
{roar}
{desperate} Oh no, please don’t let me be too late…
{out loud} {furious} Stay away from my human!
{crunch sfx}
{triumph} Hah. That’ll teach you.
Did you get the last of the goblins, lady kni- {wary} What are you doing.
Put that sword down, please, I’m not your enemy.
Okay, no, no, calm down, there’s no need to get worked up.
This isn’t helping anything, can we just talk?
{upset} OW! All right, this has gone far enough
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{sigh} {fading out} What am I going to do with you?
{some indicator of a time skip}
{cordial} Good morning, lady knight. As promised, I brought you to my lair.
Oh, yes, you must be confused.
{whoosh sfx}
There, is that better?
{resigned} Yes. It was me the whole time.
No, it wasn’t. If it had been a game, you would be dead right now. Instead you’re alive, unharmed, even unrestrained, in the middle of my hoard.
Or didn’t you notice?
{amused} Yes, I thought that might get your attention. Being surrounded by enough gold to fill a palace ten times over generally does the trick where humans are involved, or so I am informed.
{annoyed} Fangbane? The sword that slew more of my kind in two years than any other managed in thousands? You want it back?
Tch, no, but I would’ve if I could. That butcher’s blade should’ve been melted down long ago. Alas, it was impervious even to my fire.
I thought that was clear: no, you can’t have it back. You can have another sword, even a magic one, but not that atrocity forged in steel.
{considering} That would seem to be the question of the hour, yes. “What are you doing here.” Well… why don’t you tell me? You were sent to kill me, that much is clear. But much more isn’t. I would like… an explanation.
{annoyed} Oh, come on. You’ve been interacting with me for days now. Do I really seem like the type of person who burns down villages at random? That excuse is worthless… and… {suspicious} I think we both know it. You were sent here for some other reason. What was it? Tell me, before I grow cross.
Oh, I believe they didn’t tell you. But, though I think you like to pretend otherwise, dumb is one thing you are not. You know more than you’re saying, so answer me. Please. Why does the king want me dead?
{stunned} That’s- that’s it? Of all the petty, arrogant, stupid- I’m not even going to bother trying with that. {snort} And humans use dragons as symbols of greed.
{explaining something obvious} Yes. Because I like gold, its color, its luster. And because I enjoy living comfortably. {disgust} Not just… to have more than others.
Even if you don’t want to concede the difference, surely it does not escape you that I earned all of this, not just killed its old owner and stole it.
{offended} Of course I did! The very idea of taking something unearned… ugh.
{considering} You really know so little of my kind…
All of this, though… brings us back to you. You were sent here, presumably because you’re the kingdom’s best knight, the one with the highest chance of victory. You weren’t given any backup because there’s only one Fangbane. And you were fed a lie about me slaughtering innocents to make the job go down easier, but something in you knew that it was a lie. Tell me, am I hitting the mark with these?
So, my question becomes… why didn’t you? You had me at the point of your blade, and with a sword like that and skills like yours, you could’ve done it. If you wanted me dead, I would be, draconic magic and might notwithstanding. Instead, all I have is a scratch on my snout- {venomous} yes, that is the scar on my nose. Injuries do carry over, thank you so much for noticing.
{curious} And now you’re sorry. I don’t think I understand you at all, no matter how hard I try. Please, answer me. I want to.
Wha- {sigh} {exasperated} Well, if you were so certain it was a lie, why come here in the first place? If you felt you were given unjust orders, you could’ve just left the kingdom. Plenty of other places need knights, and there’s always work to be found as a sellsword. You risked much to gain… nothing, as best as I can see.
{dangerous} He… he what?
The king threatened to…
{cold} No. No, that is unacceptable.
No one threatens my human.
Yes, my human. I- {sigh} {warmer} I believe an explanation is in order. You see, I finally figured out what I’ve been feeling these past few days. At first, I thought it might be love, and, well, I suppose it is, of a kind: hoarding instinct. I feel hoarding instinct when I look at you. I saw you for the first time, and something in me just knew. You are the most precious treasure in this entire cavern, and I need to protect and keep you until the end of time, like the work of art you are.
{worried} Ohh, that’s not a good expression. Did I say something wrong? Come on too strong? I promise, living here won’t be bad at all, it’s quite a comfortable lair, whether I’m in human form or dragon. I maintain a good relationship with the villagers, too, so we can even go down to Wylgrith on day trips, as long as you don’t try to leave. You understand the importance of that, I trust.
{calming} No, no, don’t get all worked up. There’s no need to do something we’ll both regret.
Please, calm down. We’re both rational people, let’s discuss this as such.
{harder} Human, I don’t want to put you to sleep again. Don’t make me.
{pleased} Good, that’s much better. Now, what are your objections?
Mhm, mhm… {logical} Well, in point of fact, no, you don’t have a home anymore. If you go back without proof of my demise, the king will have you executed, will he not?
As I thought. So there’s nowhere else for you to be. As to your next point, of course I won’t keep you as a pet, you’re a sentient human. You have your own free will, thoughts, ideas, desires, the whole package. You would never be a pet. You will be my treasure. Very different thing, and it means I will want to keep you close, keep you safe, and stare at your radiance for as long as draconically possible.
{considering} Well, no, I haven’t heard of this. A living part of a dragon’s hoard? I believe it’s unprecedented, since nothing but gold lasts forever. Nevertheless, we’ll figure something out, we can make it work. And this doesn’t reflect strangely on me, you needn’t worry. I am one of the eldest dragons of this age, the young are used to my… peculiarities by now.
{pleased} Ah, yes, I wondered when we would get to that point. No, as a matter of fact, the king will not be sending other knights, or mages, or armies after me. I will not be killed like that, and you will not be reclaimed by them. And do you wish to know why?
{colder than ice} Because I am going to burn this kingdom to the ground. {amused} Naturally. I could overlook the attempt on my life - it brought me the most precious treasure I have ever known, after all, - I could forgive the use of Fangbane, since now I can make sure it never harms one of my kind again, I could even somewhat tolerate the blatant lies spread about me as flimsy justification. {angry} What I cannot accept, however, is what they have done to you. Threats on your life, on your body, on those you protect, promises of execution, forcing you to stain your soul against your will… no. No one is permitted to harm my human and live. This will, I admit, be something of a first for dragonkind, actually killing humans instead of protecting them is practically unheard of. I may even face repercussions from my kind for this. I find it hard to care, though, these ones are only getting what they deserve, for their actions or their complacence.
Now you’re getting upset again. {soothing} Don’t worry, this isn’t a sign of my outlook changing. I still have no desire to harm humans, and the village is perfectly safe.
We were communicating so well a second ago, if we could return to that, I would be grateful.
I promise you, this shouting and carrying on is nothing but counterproductive.
{tired} Lady knight, if you are not capable of being objective, I will be forced to- oh, forget it.
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{gentle} {slowly fading out} I truly am sorry to do this to you, but I can’t have you fighting me on this. I don’t want you to be upset at me, treasure, so, by the time you wake, the cause of this contention will be gone.
Shh, shh. It’s okay. It’s just a simple sleep spell, you’ll wake up comfortable and well-rested.
There. It will all be fixed before you awaken. Don’t worry, my treasure, nothing will ever harm you again.

Intro: For your distinguished service to the crown, you’ve been assigned the difficult and dangerous job of slaying a dragon purported to have slaughtered a village on the outskirts of the kingdom. It’s a job you should be able to handle, and you’re not too scared… now, if only the whole thing felt less wrong…
Summary: Listener meets a new acquaintance who befriends him, and offers to guide him where he needs to go. They face a danger together, and he learns that she is not what she seems.
Go ahead and monetize, it's fine. Word count is about 3800.
If you fill this or plan to fill this, please notify me. Please don't make edits without asking first.
TWs: Running deception, combat, discussion of mass murder (dragon burning places to the ground), possessiveness, forced sleep
Line breaks represent the listener talking or space where no one talks and should be short pauses, words within {brackets} represent the speaker’s tone or sfx. At ellipses, the speaker trails off, and at dashes, she is either cut off abruptly by the listener or by herself.
Author’s Note: God, this took way too long to write. A couple months, if you count when I had the idea and when I wrote the first few sentences. Well, it’s here now, and I hope it’s not too disappointing. Prequel series go!
If you want to read this somewhere other than Reddit, it's also here.
M4F Version here.
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{internal monologue} {disgusted} Ugh, those damn livestock merchants charge more every time. Gouging bastards, {rationalization} but I do need them to stay silent. If the town finds out how much food I have to purchase every month, it’ll only end badly. Besides, it’s not like even this much bribery makes a dent in my hoard. I should really just be glad I haven’t met any merchants with integrity, that wouldn’t end well. Good thing it’s a vanishingly rare trait these days… {annoyance} wait, no, that’s not a good thing, what am I saying? It’s sad… but it does make my life easier. Well, that’s a hell of a conundrum. {sigh} {bored} Not one I haven’t dealt with before, though. Have this conversation with myself every time. Oh, well. What matters is the food’ll be delivered soon, I don’t have to go into hibernation, and the merchants won’t talk. Anything else I wanted to do before heading home? Hmm… I think I wanted to stop at the spice merchant, see how much- {interest} HELlo. Who is that?
{curiosity} What would a knight be doing here? I mean, I suppose the goblin raids have been getting more brazen, but the town guards seem to have it handled, I haven’t even needed to get involved yet. I guess he could be here about that, but it doesn’t feel right. Maybe he’s just passing through? Well, best way to find out is to go talk to-
{quiet} Oh, damn. That’s- oh, damn. Fuck, he’s hot. {forced calm} Okay, composure. You are an all-powerful dragon. You will not be thrown off your game by one mortal, no matter how shiny his armor is. And it’s only his armor you’ll be looking at, right? Right. Ignore that beautiful face, you just need to find out what he’s doing here, not-
{suspicious} Wait. Who’s he talking to? {upset} The spice merchant? And she’s BLUSHING? Uh-uh. No. Not gonna fly.
{out loud} {sickly sweet} Hiiiii, hello! It’s me again, I’m here to pick up some- Oh? Who’s this? A new friend?
Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were having a conversation. Please, continue. I can wait.
{cough}
Oh, no, don’t mind me, just looking at… cumin. My, this smells awfully strong.
So sorry to barge in again, uh, I would like to buy these.
Are you leaving? Well, it was lovely to meet you.
{internal monologue} Okay, let me just finish up here, and I can go talk to him.
{pleased} Hah! Look frustrated, spice skank. Serves you right. {confused} Wait, do I know your name? Have I ever asked your name? Eh, doesn’t matter right now, I don’t need to know everyone in the village. {disgust} Especially not someone who flirts with- {confusion} Wait, what am I doing? I don’t have any claim over some random knight, why am I acting like this?
{frustrated noise} Figure out internal dilemma later, find human now. Where’d he go?
Agh! Curse this mortal form’s short legs, I can’t see- wait! Shiny!
{out loud} Hey! Hey! Wait up!
{out of breath} Whew… Thought I was gonna… gonna lose you… for a minute.
Thanks. Only need… a few seconds…
{composed} Hi. I’m Tiamat*.* Sorry to chase after you like that, but I realized I didn’t catch your name?
Oh, that’s a lovely name. It suits you.
{pleased} Oh, flatterer. {internal monologue} He’s smooth, isn’t he? I was expecting all muscle, no brain. I understand why the spice merchant was blushing now, I guess. {out loud} I just wanted to ask you… uh, I wanted to ask you what you were doing at the spice merchant’s? Usually passers-through don’t stop there when they can get their salt cheaper elsewhere.
Oh, that’s interesting! I didn’t know you could find that here.
Oh, no, I don’t spend very much time there. I mostly go in, buy what I need for my next few weeks of meals, and leave. Other places to be. More important places.
{laugh} Well. You certainly know the way to a woman’s heart. {internal monologue} A knight with both manners and a sense of humor… who’d have thought?
{out loud} Wonderful. So, what brings you to Wylgrith? It’s not a large settlement by any means, and well out of the way of… everything, really. What reason would a mighty royal knight have for stopping by? Were you sent to handle the goblins that-
{stunned} …Say what now?
The dragon? You were sent to kill the DRAGON?
Can you… not?
{off-balance} I mean- uh- Well, I don’t see why you would, do I? After all, the dragon hasn’t been seen or heard from in years, right? And even before that she didn’t harm any humans for decades. She-
I- uhhh… I guess I’m guessing she’s a ‘she?’ I did see her once, flying overhead, though, and she looked like a girl dragon. Kind of slender.
I… suppose ‘it’ works as well, yeah. {quiet, sad} A little hurtful, though…
{back on track} Nothing, nothing. So, why are you killing the dragon, again? I don’t think… it… has even harmed a human in living memory.
{sputtering} What? No it didn’t!
I- I think I would know if it burned down a village. I mean, this place is still standing, right?
A different- Well, I’m sure she wouldn’t have done anything like-
{quickly} No, no, I don’t know. It’s not like I’ve met the thing, right? But it hasn’t burned down this village, so why would-
{tentative} Oh. They said that?
Right to the king?
Right in the middle of court, where everyone could hear it?
{sad} I guess that settles that, then. The dragon needs to die.
{internal monologue} Damn. What a waste of such a handsome knight. There’s no chance he could possibly beat me on his own, so he’s going to end up- wait, on his own?
{out loud} {confused} And the king sent you? Alone, I mean? No army, or squad of knights, or cadre of mages? Why would he do that?
{awed} Oh. Oh, that is a very magic sword.
Well, no, I haven’t. But- but you can just tell, can’t you? It’s glowing! And it’s covered in some kind of weird letters, those have to be magical, right?
{internal monologue} {hesitant} Okay. That’s somewhat worrying. Even with all the useless sigils and that pointless glow siphoning its energy, I can feel the power rippling off that thing. Where did he ever find- No, that doesn’t matter. Could it level the playing field? Give him a chance? Hard to tell, I think, my senses in this form aren’t as-
{out loud} I’m sorry, what? I was distracted. Uh- it’s a very pretty sword.
{taken aback} That’s- that’s a good name for it. Very dangerous-sounding.
{internal monologue}{stressed} ARE YOU KIDDING ME? FANGBANE? HE FOUND FANGBANE? HOW IN THE- {forced composure} no, I’m calm, I’m calm, it’s fine. It’s not worrying at all that he has the most dangerous dragon-slaying sword ever forged. Wow, this very quickly went from “I don’t want to fight him, I don’t want to kill him” to “I don’t want to fight him, I don’t want to die.” Okay, time to nip this in the bud.
{out loud} Wow, it’s done that much? I never would’ve guessed that, it looks much too fancy for that. So… you can actually kill the dragon?
{hesitant} You’re right, I suppose. If it burned a village, it does deserve that. Well… *{resolve}*Do you know how to find its lair?
No, it’s not. If it was, everyone would be constantly in there robbing the hoard, wouldn’t we? Everyone knows that the lair is somewhere on the mountain, but no one knows where.
{triumph} Yes. Except me. And I’ll guide you there.
{reasonable} We already agreed, right? If it burned down a village, killed that many people, it needs to be put down. I want to help with that, and besides, you need someone to take you there. You’ll never find it on your own, so you can’t be too choosy about who you bring, can you?
I like hiking, and the mountain isn’t dangerous if you’ve known what you were doing since you were a child. I found it once, but I ran immediately, because I didn’t want to risk angering the dragon. I think I can find it again, but it’ll be a long trip. Three days at minimum.
{internal monologue} {satisfied} Perfect. A few days wandering in the forest should discourage him, maybe I can even convince him I didn’t burn any village. {confused} Why would he have been told… {moving on} Doesn’t matter right now. What matters is getting him off my trail, and maybe getting to know him in the meantime… {upset} No! Stop that! Bad Tiamat! He’s literally trying to kill you. He is not a prospective mate, he isn’t even another dragon!
{sigh} {wistful} He is handsome, though, especially when the light catches his armor like that… No! Stop!
{out loud} {serious} We should set out soon, then. Do you have enough provisions for the trip?
Good, good. No time to waste, come on.
You’re hunting a dragon. A dragon. Don’t you think it might be wise to move before she- it catches wind of your presence?
Let’s go, then.
{some indicator of a time skip}
{amused} What, don’t tell me you’re getting tired? We’ve only been hiking for a couple hours today, aren’t you supposed to be a big, strong knight?
You could take off the armor, if it’s that hot.
{concession} All right, your decision. And I suppose wearing the armor was helpful when the tangler tree tried to grab you. Fine, we’ll stop for a bit.
How much is left in your waterskin?
Good, good. Mine’s pretty full, I haven’t felt thirsty in a while.
No, we’re definitely going in the right direction. {grasping at straws} I recognize… uh, that rock! Yeah. See how it kinda looks like a bear, if you tilt your head?
Really? Well, I see it. Anyway, I remember seeing that before. We’re about a day’s walk away from the lair, I’m almost certain.
You know, you never asked why I decided to hike in a random direction for three days. {internal monologue} {pleased} I have such a good story for it, too. It’ll leave you crying, and then maybe I can-
{out loud} {taken aback} You do?
What? You’re a royal knight, one of the most honored positions in the land. Why would you feel the need to escape?
{internal monologue} What? What was that? There for a second and then gone, was that… a crack in the charming exterior?
{out loud} No, no, I understand the feeling. I just… didn’t expect it from this quarter. Is something wrong at court? Are you-
{inner monologue} {protective} Oh… Oh his eyes… So sad… What did they do to you, my knight?
{out loud} Please, anything you can-
{confused} What? What’s wrong?
No, I’m not going to shush, we’re talking, and-
{muffled} Mmph! MMMMPH!
{inner monologue} {angy} This presumptuous human dares lay his hand on ME? I don’t care what might be inside him, I’m going to make it outside- {considering} Wait. What’s that noise?
That doesn’t sound like- oh. Oh, those are goblins. And he wanted me to be quiet, and now they heard us, and- oops. Why did I not sense them coming? Goblins wouldn’t know stealth if it snuck up behind them and ripped their legs off, I should’ve heard them from miles away. This doesn’t make any sense… Oh, well. I suppose it doesn’t matter, in the grand scheme of things. Just a few more goblins to kill. If he’d just let go of me… wait, but I don’t want to reveal myself. That makes this much more difficult. Can I kill all these green idiots in my human form? {concerned} Oh, wow, that’s… a worrying amount. Where are they all coming from? All right, I think I can take- wait, what? Human? What are you doing?
{out loud} Why are you getting in front of me? That is far too many goblins for any human to handle, we need to run!
{internal monologue} {flustered} Wha? What does he mean by that? And why does he have to be this handsome as he says it? That’s unfair!
{out loud} No- you can’t-
{internal monologue} {upset} Oh, the stupid, brave, self-sacrificial idiot! He’s gonna get himself killed if I don’t help him- wait, what?
{taken aback} He’s- oh, wow, that’s quite impressive. That’s- wow. I’ve never seen a human fight like that.
{confused} Huh? Why’s he looking back… Is he angry? What?
He’s yelling something… He wants me to run? Wha- {realization} OHHHHH- He thinks I’m in danger, and he’s trying to protect me! He wants to- {touched} aw. That’s the sweetest thing… My heart- {serious} I need to keep this knight alive.
{realization} Oh! I have to pretend to be running, yes. I can’t help him here, much as I want to. Besides, it looks like he has it handled. Those goblins aren’t laying a claw on him, somehow. Guess it was a good decision to wear the armor.
{planning} I’ll come back for him later, and he can be happy that he kept me safe, and maybe I can use that to find out what’s wrong with him, oh, looks like he’s just about finished with those- {shock} wut.
What is that.
That’s a- that’s a freaking hellhound! What in the Low Realms is a hellhound doing here?
{protective} Okay, no, unacceptable. I am not risking my treasure- {concerned} the human. The human! Why did I just think of him as- never mind, time for that later.
{whoosh sfx}
{roar}
{desperate} Oh no, please don’t let me be too late…
{out loud} {furious} Stay away from my human!
{crunch sfx}
{triumph} Hah. That’ll teach you.
Did you get the last of the goblins, sir kni- {wary} What are you doing.
Put that sword down, please, I’m not your enemy.
Okay, no, no, calm down, there’s no need to get worked up.
This isn’t helping anything, can we just talk?
{upset} OW! All right, this has gone far enough
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{sigh} {fading out} What am I going to do with you?
{some indicator of a time skip}
{cordial} Good morning, sir knight. As promised, I brought you to my lair.
Oh, yes, you must be confused.
{whoosh sfx}
There, is that better?
{resigned} Yes. It was me the whole time.
No, it wasn’t. If it had been a game, you would be dead right now. Instead you’re alive, unharmed, even unrestrained, in the middle of my hoard.
Or didn’t you notice?
{amused} Yes, I thought that might get your attention. Being surrounded by enough gold to fill a palace ten times over generally does the trick where humans are involved, or so I am informed.
{annoyed} Fangbane? The sword that slew more of my kind in two years than any other managed in thousands? You want it back?
Tch, no, but I would’ve if I could. That butcher’s blade should’ve been melted down long ago. Alas, it was impervious even to my fire.
I thought that was clear: no, you can’t have it back. You can have another sword, even a magic one, but not that atrocity forged in steel.
{considering} That would seem to be the question of the hour, yes. “What are you doing here.” Well… why don’t you tell me? You were sent to kill me, that much is clear. But much more isn’t. I would like… an explanation.
{annoyed} Oh, come on. You’ve been interacting with me for days now. Do I really seem like the type of person who burns down villages at random? That excuse is worthless… and… {suspicious} I think we both know it. You were sent here for some other reason. What was it? Tell me, before I grow cross.
Oh, I believe they didn’t tell you. But, though I think you like to pretend otherwise, dumb is one thing you are not. You know more than you’re saying, so answer me. Please. Why does the king want me dead?
{stunned} That’s- that’s it? Of all the petty, arrogant, stupid- I’m not even going to bother trying with that. {snort} And humans use dragons as symbols of greed.
{explaining something obvious} Yes. Because I like gold, its color, its luster. And because I enjoy living comfortably. {disgust} Not just… to have more than others.
Even if you don’t want to concede the difference, surely it does not escape you that I earned all of this, not just killed its old owner and stole it.
{offended} Of course I did! The very idea of taking something unearned… ugh.
{considering} You really know so little of my kind…
All of this, though… brings us back to you. You were sent here, presumably because you’re the kingdom’s best knight, the one with the highest chance of victory. You weren’t given any backup because there’s only one Fangbane. And you were fed a lie about me slaughtering innocents to make the job go down easier, but something in you knew that it was a lie. Tell me, am I hitting the mark with these?
So, my question becomes… why didn’t you? You had me at the point of your blade, and with a sword like that and skills like yours, you could’ve done it. If you wanted me dead, I would be, draconic magic and might notwithstanding. Instead, all I have is a scratch on my snout- {venomous} yes, that is the scar on my nose. Injuries do carry over, thank you so much for noticing.
{curious} And now you’re sorry. I don’t think I understand you at all, no matter how hard I try. Please, answer me. I want to.
Wha- {sigh} {exasperated} Well, if you were so certain it was a lie, why come here in the first place? If you felt you were given unjust orders, you could’ve just left the kingdom. Plenty of other places need knights, and there’s always work to be found as a sellsword. You risked much to gain… nothing, as best as I can see.
{dangerous} He… he what?
The king threatened to…
{cold} No. No, that is unacceptable.
No one threatens my human.
Yes, my human. I- {sigh} {warmer} I believe an explanation is in order. You see, I finally figured out what I’ve been feeling these past few days. At first, I thought it might be love, and, well, I suppose it is, of a kind: hoarding instinct. I feel hoarding instinct when I look at you. I saw you for the first time, and something in me just knew. You are the most precious treasure in this entire cavern, and I need to protect and keep you until the end of time, like the work of art you are.
{worried} Ohh, that’s not a good expression. Did I say something wrong? Come on too strong? I promise, living here won’t be bad at all, it’s quite a comfortable lair, whether I’m in human form or dragon. I maintain a good relationship with the villagers, too, so we can even go down to Wylgrith on day trips, as long as you don’t try to leave. You understand the importance of that, I trust.
{calming} No, no, don’t get all worked up. There’s no need to do something we’ll both regret.
Please, calm down. We’re both rational people, let’s discuss this as such.
{harder} Human, I don’t want to put you to sleep again. Don’t make me.
{pleased} Good, that’s much better. Now, what are your objections?
Mhm, mhm… {logical} Well, in point of fact, no, you don’t have a home anymore. If you go back without proof of my demise, the king will have you executed, will he not?
As I thought. So there’s nowhere else for you to be. As to your next point, of course I won’t keep you as a pet, you’re a sentient human. You have your own free will, thoughts, ideas, desires, the whole package. You would never be a pet. You will be my treasure. Very different thing, and it means I will want to keep you close, keep you safe, and stare at your radiance for as long as draconically possible.
{considering} Well, no, I haven’t heard of this. A living part of a dragon’s hoard? I believe it’s unprecedented, since nothing but gold lasts forever. Nevertheless, we’ll figure something out, we can make it work. And this doesn’t reflect strangely on me, you needn’t worry. I am one of the eldest dragons of this age, the young are used to my… peculiarities by now.
{pleased} Ah, yes, I wondered when we would get to that point. No, as a matter of fact, the king will not be sending other knights, or mages, or armies after me. I will not be killed like that, and you will not be reclaimed by them. And do you wish to know why?
{colder than ice} Because I am going to burn this kingdom to the ground.{amused} Naturally. I could overlook the attempt on my life - it brought me the most precious treasure I have ever known, after all, - I could forgive the use of Fangbane, since now I can make sure it never harms one of my kind again, I could even somewhat tolerate the blatant lies spread about me as flimsy justification. {angry} What I cannot accept, however, is what they have done to you. Threats on your life, on your body, on those you protect, promises of execution, forcing you to stain your soul against your will… no. No one is permitted to harm my human and live. This will, I admit, be something of a first for dragonkind, actually killing humans instead of protecting them is practically unheard of. I may even face repercussions from my kind for this. I find it hard to care, though, these ones are only getting what they deserve, for their actions or their complacence.
Now you’re getting upset again. {soothing} Don’t worry, this isn’t a sign of my outlook changing. I still have no desire to harm humans, and the village is perfectly safe.
We were communicating so well a second ago, if we could return to that, I would be grateful.
I promise you, this shouting and carrying on is nothing but counterproductive.
{tired} Sir knight, if you are not capable of being objective, I will be forced to- oh, forget it.
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{gentle} {slowly fading out} I truly am sorry to do this to you, but I can’t have you fighting me on this. I don’t want you to be upset at me, treasure, so, by the time you wake, the cause of this contention will be gone.
Shh, shh. It’s okay. It’s just a simple sleep spell, you’ll wake up comfortable and well-rested.
There. It will all be fixed before you awaken. Don’t worry, my treasure, nothing will ever harm you again.

First of all, let me clear out a few things.

• I'm not a stan of any contestant and I'll try not to have a bias towards anyone while i post this.
• I'm not criticising anyone for their looks or weakness but mostly for their hypocritical actions & words which is negatively impacting the show and majorly spoiling the vibes.
• I know this is gonna be long, i might miss out a few points which you can add in comments , so please bear with me.
• Mods, I'm not breaking any rules or abusing anyone here. Just stating my observations.
• I'll state the good points too which i like about everybody. The negatives & the positives keep changing with every epsisode. So this is limited to what is up so far.
• I'll keep the content limited to what i see in episodes as i don't follow the recent insta controversies much.

Siwet : - Avoids situations & conversations and try to divert any actual blames with some past stories or fake sympathies. - Always up for fighting people in dome and get aggressive which is sooo overdone. - Let Anica speak ffs! - Call yourself a "performer" only when you actually perform ! - "Addy tune baakiyo ko pitch ki toh tujhe nahi liya" Wtf bro ?

• He tries to respect bonds, goes on a limb to save Aniket & Ayushman as much as he could. Did addy dirty a couple of times though.
• Although everybody plans and plots, but plays game on face more than other contestants rather than hiding behind.

Anica : - Stop victimising yourself so much that your emotions start looking washed out. - Grow out of the dependant personality. - "Brooo" and the 🤌🏻🤌🏻 are irritating af.

• Haven't fucked up any task as such.
• She doesn't bitch any wrong things about Lakshay and tries to maintain good relations which i find nice.

Digvijay : - Stop with the hypocrisy! "Mai toh bolunga beech me" & "mere beech me mat bol" is plane stupid. - Although all ex-roadies & TRP contestants are getting majorly favoured, but his looks very clear with the out of nowhere saves & unfair ideal match contender when he was literally standing unsafe. - Stop using your friends (nayera to save, then demotivating her for dome which was logically right but could have been said subtly) (Gullu to write his name and then dumping her) (Akriti to save him and not sending her to den which i really loved tho XD ) - However true it maybe as well know, but calling out Prince to de-justify any other's spot was just purely out of jealousy and spite when he literally tried to do the same in roadies and outside.

• Plays game straight forward out of all the others. No behind the back bullshit.
• Beast performer
• Good at logics and strategies (asking Nayera not to go to the dome which almost eliminated Sachin if not for the twist) ik i contradicted myself but he could have talked it out better.
• Never said anything wrong about his ex.

Unnati : - although almost all the couples are fake and were pre-planned but having a bf outside and still coming to the show is a big NO NO ! - stop being so insecure dragging ishita in everything needs to stop when digvijay & ishita are literally showing no affections to each other (although i get the emotions & bringing exes was the whole point of this but still) - Crybaby over having no friends what?!

• Chose a good partner is all i can say lol.

Addy : - STOP flexing your steroids , losing temper every two seconds. - Grow a spine, "mai kabhi task nahi karunga iske saath" to "meri marzi mai jo karu"

• Might turn out to be a good performer in strength based task, haven't had any yet.
• Having survived so far and would survive further which is expected despite being all this stupidity, I'll count as a plus idk xD

Kashish : - Stop being so horny all the time ffs, it's soo cringe. - This fake sophisticated queen aura needs to be stopped.

• Doesn't fear to call out people . Be it akriti , yuvraj or even his own connection sometimes.
• Good performer so far.
• vamp vibes me likey.

Lakshay : - Same as unnati, having a gf and coming to the show is a NO NO for me. - Again like addy, stop making diggy papa and grow a spine. (Asking for chances to save and then giving them to diggy taking others for a fool) - However bitter your past relation maybe, but don't let Diggy disrespect your ex infront of you or everyone when you say you respect her. - Speak more bruh.

• Most well mannered among any other guy. Calm minded, lets people speak to the point of literally getting walked over.
• Haven't spoke shit about any people in the game.
• Supports his friends.

Ruru : - Unneccessary baseless shouting in last dome was such a turn off exactly like Divyansh.

• Tough mentality.
• Nice vibes , cute.

Sachin : - Literally a dumb character, lost half of the times, fucks up tasks . - cries more than needed ( he was done dirty in the court room tho) - Confused with connections and goes for the ones which makes no sense ( like deekila who was already messed up with aniket & even the personalities are so poles apart) . good that he finally paired up now. - Either defend your connection or just call her out for her fuckup, don't try to play both sides. (court room digvijay i love you drama)

• Genuine overall. Tries to maintain good relations with everyone and does less groupism than other people.
• Sweet & gonna rock in dance & entertainment & town-market wale tasks (if there any) probably.

Akriti : - Most cringe contestant of the whole show. - Majorly favoured by the show be it ideal match or screentime or VDs. - Crybaby max. Cry over sachin, cry over diggy allegations, cry over not being able to go to Loveden, cry over people calling her put and i can go on. - stop speaking in between everybody ffs. (she does it way far more than siwet & diggy) - Stop acting like a queen ffs it's so cringe. - stop with your "Maine aapko favour kiya aap mujhe favour lautao" . mat karo bhai favour fir . - Acts like a mastermind by saving diggy and then crying about it and bringing it up everytime.

• favours friends which is good in splitsvilla ig? (throwing hearts wala task where everybody was trying to show themselves neutral just for screen)
• understands vote in , vote outs and numbers game a little better.

Jashwant : - Stop with haan-ji, correct , ekdum sahi, bilkul, agreed and have your own opinions. - Stop with the cringe romantic one liners . - Speak more bruh (but speak sensible) and speak for yourself. You're not your partners' ambassador.

• Good genes lol
• Laidback, chill.

Nayera : - Stop milking your 2 day fling for such drama and sympathy (although it was need of the show and she finally got over it but still) - Stop crying and showing how you got hurt & ruined and then call it chewing gum and stuff. double standards.

• Goes out on a limb for friends. Values relations over playing double sides.
• Beast performer.

Harsh : - Most cringe contestant after Akriti. Stop with this King-Queen bullshit. - Stop acting like you're playing neutral when you're actually playing both sides (dono side jaake chugli karna) - Stop hyping up yourself as morally correct using feminism and fairness. (court room , tasks and dome votes)

• Somehow gets the best girls wtf

Rushali : - What a poor choice of guy lol - Elegant. Well behaved. Carries herself well. Dresses beautifully and talks graciously.
Shobhika - Again, having a bf and coming to the show ? NOPE. - Cried when called out by yuvraj and legit ran away from the set? - Does nothing and is basically female ayushman lol.

• somehow has the best friends to save her everytime.
• chill, laidback, cute .

Ishita : - Going and fighting to stand between Diggy and unnati in ex-isle was so weird to watch (although she was been told by uorfi)

• Nice personality overall. always respects diggy and never bitches about him.

Yuvraj : - Does he really understand the concept of the show? You have to make a connection to move forward lol.

• Dresses cool. Genuine and great personality and styling sense.
• Most chill and laidback (after lord Rigden ofcourse)

Adit : - Please grow a spine and stop having a herd mentality. - not fit for the politics and the dirties of the show.

• Great vibes, pretty chill, funny.

Khanak: - Stop following the herd mentality again. - Despite even knowing the other connections are fake and theirs are genuine, it somehow seems faker than the others?

• Carries herself well.
• Gives proper sophisticated NRI vibes (unlike kashish & shobhika. idk if they're for sure)

Ameha : - Idk. speak more? hide less. - Cutest of all. Dresses and carries herself well. - Most bearable nepali contestant amongst all. (it has nothing to do with race. it just how she carries herself better than the rest)
Devakaran : - speak more , hide less in crowd maybe ? - Old school gentlemen vibes.
Arbaaz : - Being married and coming to the show? NOPEEEE. - Romance is so dead and fake . cringe.

• No drama . Speaks as much needed and somehow still not hides in the crowd and have a more opinionated stand than adit & devkaran.

Aniket : - Major toxicity alert! Messed up relationship, mean vibes and much controlling. - Maintains calm even when provoked . Tries not to involve people in his messed up connection (his fuckups actually) .
Deekila : - Dependant personality pro max. - Irritating to the ears once she starts shouting. - Forgiving aniket after whatver was revealed to us is the only truth takes heart and if she takes step to fix it , it's heartening to see. (although it's toxic and wrong but still)
Lastly, i feel like this calling out was much needed. Akriti hate on this sub is justified, Digvijay worshipping is going too much and needs to be called out for his hypocrisy but i think is this sub is filled with his insta supporters now, dewangini-divyansh stupidity was needed to be called out for, ayushman and rigden hype is a yesss, nayera is underrated and siwet turns his unneccessary hate into completely neccessary with each episode and instagram oustide the show . Sorry, not sorry. Feel free to add any if i missed or you don't agree to.

Intro: For your distinguished service to the crown, you’ve been assigned the difficult and dangerous job of slaying a dragon purported to have slaughtered a village on the outskirts of the kingdom. It’s a job you should be able to handle, and you’re not too scared… now, if only the whole thing felt less wrong…
Summary: Listener meets a new acquaintance who befriends her, and offers to guide her where she needs to go. They face a danger together, and she learns that he is not what he seems.
Go ahead and monetize, it's fine. Word count is about 3800.
If you fill this or plan to fill this, please notify me. Please don't make edits without asking first.
TWs: Running deception, combat, discussion of mass murder (dragon burning places to the ground), possessiveness, forced sleep
Line breaks represent the listener talking or space where no one talks and should be short pauses, words within {brackets} represent the speaker’s tone or sfx. At ellipses, the speaker trails off, and at dashes, he is either cut off abruptly by the listener or by himself.
Author’s Note: And also the flipped version, for the draconic gentlemen out there!
If you want to read this somewhere other than Reddit, it's also here.
F4M version here.
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{internal monologue} {disgusted} Ugh, those damn livestock merchants charge more every time. Gouging bastards, {rationalization} but I do need them to stay silent. If the town finds out how much food I have to purchase every month, it’ll only end badly. Besides, it’s not like even this much bribery makes a dent in my hoard. I should really just be glad I haven’t met any merchants with integrity, that wouldn’t end well. Good thing it’s a vanishingly rare trait these days… {annoyance} wait, no, that’s not a good thing, what am I saying? It’s sad… but it does make my life easier. Well, that’s a hell of a conundrum. {sigh} {bored} Not one I haven’t dealt with before, though. Have this conversation with myself every time. Oh, well. What matters is the food’ll be delivered soon, I don’t have to go into hibernation, and the merchants won’t talk. Anything else I wanted to do before heading home? Hmm… I think I wanted to stop at the spice merchant, see how much- {interest} HELlo. Who is that?
{curiosity} What would a knight be doing here? I mean, I suppose the goblin raids have been getting more brazen, but the town guards seem to have it handled, I haven’t even needed to get involved yet. I guess she could be here about that, but it doesn’t feel right. Maybe she’s just passing through? Well, best way to find out is to go talk to-
{quiet} Oh, damn. That’s- oh, damn. Fuck, she’s hot. {forced calm} Okay, composure. You are an all-powerful dragon. You will not be thrown off your game by one mortal, no matter how shiny her armor is. And it’s only her armor you’ll be looking at, right? Right. Ignore that beautiful face, you just need to find out what she’s doing here, not-
{suspicious} Wait. Who’s she talking to? {upset} The spice merchant? And he’s BLUSHING? Uh-uh. No. Not gonna fly.
{out loud} {sickly sweet} Hiiiii, hello! It’s me again, I’m here to pick up some- Oh? Who’s this? A new friend?
Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were having a conversation. Please, continue. I can wait.
{cough}
Oh, no, don’t mind me, just looking at… cumin. My, this smells awfully strong.
So sorry to barge in again, uh, I would like to buy these.
Are you leaving? Well, it was lovely to meet you.
{internal monologue} Okay, let me just finish up here, and I can go talk to her.
{pleased} Hah! Look frustrated, spice sleazeball. Serves you right. {confused} Wait, do I know your name? Have I ever asked your name? Eh, doesn’t matter right now, I don’t need to know everyone in the village. {disgust} Especially not someone who flirts with- {confusion} Wait, what am I doing? I don’t have any claim over some random knight, why am I acting like this?
{frustrated noise} Figure out internal dilemma later, find human now. Where’d she go?
Agh! Curse this mortal form’s short legs, I can’t see- wait! Shiny!
{out loud} Hey! Hey! Wait up!
{out of breath} Whew… Thought I was gonna… gonna lose you… for a minute.
Thanks. Only need… a few seconds…
{composed} Hi. I’m Typhon. Sorry to chase after you like that, but I realized I didn’t catch your name?
Oh, that’s a lovely name. It suits you.
{pleased} Oh, flatterer. {internal monologue} She’s smooth, isn’t she? I was expecting all armor, no brain. I understand why the spice merchant was blushing now, I guess. {out loud} I just wanted to ask you… uh, I wanted to ask you what you were doing at the spice merchant’s? Usually passers-through don’t stop there when they can get their salt cheaper elsewhere.
Oh, that’s interesting! I didn’t know you could find that here.
Oh, no, I don’t spend very much time there. I mostly go in, buy what I need for my next few weeks of meals, and leave. Other places to be. More important places.
{laugh} Well. You certainly know the way to a man’s heart. {internal monologue} A knight with both manners and a sense of humor… who’d have thought?
{out loud} Wonderful. So, what brings you to Wylgrith? It’s not a large settlement by any means, and well out of the way of… everything, really. What reason would a mighty royal knight have for stopping by? Were you sent to handle the goblins that-
{stunned} …Say what now?
The dragon? You were sent to kill the DRAGON?
Can you… not?
{off-balance} I mean- uh- Well, I don’t see why you would, do I? After all, the dragon hasn’t been seen or heard from in years, right? And even before that he didn’t harm any humans for decades. He-
I- uhhh… I guess I’m guessing he’s a ‘he?’ I did see him once, flying overhead, though, and he looked like a boy dragon. Kind of stocky.
I… suppose ‘it’ works as well, yeah. {quiet, sad} A little hurtful, though…
{back on track} Nothing, nothing. So, why are you killing the dragon, again? I don’t think… it… has even harmed a human in living memory.
{sputtering} What? No it didn’t!
I- I think I would know if it burned down a village. I mean, this place is still standing, right?
A different- Well, I’m sure he wouldn’t have done anything like-
{quickly} No, no, I don’t know. It’s not like I’ve met the thing, right? But it hasn’t burned down this village, so why would-
{tentative} Oh. They said that?
Right to the king?
Right in the middle of court, where everyone could hear it?
{sad} I guess that settles that, then. The dragon needs to die.
{internal monologue} Damn. What a waste of such a beautiful knight. There’s no chance she could possibly beat me on her own, so she’s going to end up- wait, on her own?
{out loud} {confused} And the king sent you? Alone, I mean? No army, or squad of knights, or cadre of mages? Why would he do that?
{awed} Oh. Oh, that is a very magic sword.
Well, no, I haven’t. But- but you can just tell, can’t you? It’s glowing! And it’s covered in some kind of weird letters, those have to be magical, right?
{internal monologue} {hesitant} Okay. That’s somewhat worrying. Even with all the useless sigils and that pointless glow siphoning its energy, I can feel the power rippling off that thing. Where did she ever find- No, that doesn’t matter. Could it level the playing field? Give her a chance? Hard to tell, I think, my senses in this form aren’t as-
{out loud} I’m sorry, what? I was distracted. Uh- it’s a very pretty sword.
{taken aback} That’s- that’s a good name for it. Very dangerous-sounding.
{internal monologue}{stressed} ARE YOU KIDDING ME? FANGBANE? SHE FOUND FANGBANE? HOW IN THE- {forced composure} no, I’m calm, I’m calm, it’s fine. It’s not worrying at all that she has the most dangerous dragon-slaying sword ever forged. Wow, this very quickly went from “I don’t want to fight her, I don’t want to kill her” to “I don’t want to fight her, I don’t want to die.” Okay, time to nip this in the bud.
{out loud} Wow, it’s done that much? I never would’ve guessed that, it looks much too fancy for that. So… you can actually kill the dragon?
{hesitant} You’re right, I suppose. If it burned a village, it does deserve that. Well… {resolve}Do you know how to find its lair?
No, it’s not. If it was, everyone would be constantly in there robbing the hoard, wouldn’t we? Everyone knows that the lair is somewhere on the mountain, but no one knows where.
{triumph} Yes. Except me. And I’ll guide you there.
{reasonable} We already agreed, right? If it burned down a village, killed that many people, it needs to be put down. I want to help with that, and besides, you need someone to take you there. You’ll never find it on your own, so you can’t be too choosy about who you bring, can you?
I like hiking, and the mountain isn’t dangerous if you’ve known what you were doing since you were a child. I found it once, but I ran immediately, because I didn’t want to risk angering the dragon. I think I can find it again, but it’ll be a long trip. Three days at minimum.
{internal monologue} {satisfied} Perfect. A few days wandering in the forest should discourage her, maybe I can even convince her I didn’t burn any village. {confused} Why would she have been told… {moving on} Doesn’t matter right now. What matters is getting her off my trail, and maybe getting to know her in the meantime… {upset} No! Stop that! Bad Typhon! She’s literally trying to kill you. She is not a prospective mate, she isn’t even another dragon!
{sigh} {wistful} She is gorgeous, though, especially when the light catches her armor like that… No! Stop!
{out loud} {serious} We should set out soon, then. Do you have enough provisions for the trip?
Good, good. No time to waste, come on.
You’re hunting a dragon. A dragon. Don’t you think it might be wise to move before he- it catches wind of your presence?
Let’s go, then.
{some indicator of a time skip}
{amused} What, don’t tell me you’re getting tired? We’ve only been hiking for a couple hours today, aren’t you supposed to be a big, strong knight?
You could take off the armor, if it’s that hot.
{concession} All right, your decision. And I suppose wearing the armor was helpful when the tangler tree tried to grab you. Fine, we’ll stop for a bit.
How much is left in your waterskin?
Good, good. Mine’s pretty full, I haven’t felt thirsty in a while.
No, we’re definitely going in the right direction. {grasping at straws} I recognize… uh, that rock! Yeah. See how it kinda looks like a bear, if you tilt your head?
Really? Well, I see it. Anyway, I remember seeing that before. We’re about a day’s walk away from the lair, I’m almost certain.
You know, you never asked why I decided to hike in a random direction for three days. {internal monologue} {pleased} I have such a good story for it, too. It’ll leave you crying, and then maybe I can-
{out loud} {taken aback} You do?
What? You’re a royal knight, one of the most honored positions in the land. Why would you feel the need to escape?
{internal monologue} What? What was that? There for a second and then gone, was that… a crack in the charming exterior?
{out loud} No, no, I understand the feeling. I just… didn’t expect it from this quarter. Is something wrong at court? Are you-
{inner monologue} {protective} Oh… Oh her eyes… So sad… What did they do to you, my knight?
{out loud} Please, anything you can-
{confused} What? What’s wrong?
No, I’m not going to shush, we’re talking, and-
{muffled} Mmph! MMMMPH!
{inner monologue} {angy} This presumptuous human dares lay her hand on ME? I don’t care what might be inside her, I’m going to make it outside- {considering} Wait. What’s that noise?
That doesn’t sound like- oh. Oh, those are goblins. And she wanted me to be quiet, and now they heard us, and- oops. Why did I not sense them coming? Goblins wouldn’t know stealth if it snuck up behind them and ripped their legs off, I should’ve heard them from miles away. This doesn’t make any sense… Oh, well. I suppose it doesn’t matter, in the grand scheme of things. Just a few more goblins to kill. If she’d just let go of me… wait, but I don’t want to reveal myself. That makes this much more difficult. Can I kill all these green idiots in my human form? {concerned} Oh, wow, that’s… a worrying amount. Where are they all coming from? All right, I think I can take- wait, what? Human? What are you doing?
{out loud} Why are you getting in front of me? That is far too many goblins for any human to handle, we need to run!
{internal monologue} {flustered} Wha? What does she mean by that? And why does she have to be this lovely as she says it? That’s unfair!
{out loud} No- you can’t-
{internal monologue} {upset} Oh, the stupid, brave, self-sacrificial idiot! She’s gonna get herself killed if I don’t help her- wait, what?
{taken aback} She’s- oh, wow, that’s quite impressive. That’s- wow. I’ve never seen a human fight like that.
{confused} Huh? Why’s she looking back… Is she angry? What?
She’s yelling something… She wants me to run? Wha- {realization} OHHHHH- She thinks I’m in danger, and she’s trying to protect me! She wants to- {touched} aw. That’s the sweetest thing… My heart- {serious} I need to keep this knight alive.
{realization} Oh! I have to pretend to be running, yes. I can’t help her here, much as I want to. Besides, it looks like she has it handled. Those goblins aren’t laying a claw on her, somehow. Guess it was a good decision to wear the armor.
{planning} I’ll come back for her later, and she can be happy that she kept me safe, and maybe I can use that to find out what’s wrong with her, oh, looks like she’s just about finished with those- {shock} wut.
What is that.
That’s a- that’s a freaking hellhound! What in the Low Realms is a hellhound doing here?
{protective} Okay, no, unacceptable. I am not risking my treasure- {concerned} the human. The human! Why did I just think of her as- never mind, time for that later.
{whoosh sfx}
{roar}
{desperate} Oh no, please don’t let me be too late…
{out loud} {furious} Stay away from my human!
{crunch sfx}
{triumph} Hah. That’ll teach you.
Did you get the last of the goblins, lady kni- {wary} What are you doing.
Put that sword down, please, I’m not your enemy.
Okay, no, no, calm down, there’s no need to get worked up.
This isn’t helping anything, can we just talk?
{upset} OW! All right, this has gone far enough
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{sigh} {fading out} What am I going to do with you?
{some indicator of a time skip}
{cordial} Good morning, lady knight. As promised, I brought you to my lair.
Oh, yes, you must be confused.
{whoosh sfx}
There, is that better?
{resigned} Yes. It was me the whole time.
No, it wasn’t. If it had been a game, you would be dead right now. Instead you’re alive, unharmed, even unrestrained, in the middle of my hoard.
Or didn’t you notice?
{amused} Yes, I thought that might get your attention. Being surrounded by enough gold to fill a palace ten times over generally does the trick where humans are involved, or so I am informed.
{annoyed} Fangbane? The sword that slew more of my kind in two years than any other managed in thousands? You want it back?
Tch, no, but I would’ve if I could. That butcher’s blade should’ve been melted down long ago. Alas, it was impervious even to my fire.
I thought that was clear: no, you can’t have it back. You can have another sword, even a magic one, but not that atrocity forged in steel.
{considering} That would seem to be the question of the hour, yes. “What are you doing here.” Well… why don’t you tell me? You were sent to kill me, that much is clear. But much more isn’t. I would like… an explanation.
{annoyed} Oh, come on. You’ve been interacting with me for days now. Do I really seem like the type of person who burns down villages at random? That excuse is worthless… and… {suspicious} I think we both know it. You were sent here for some other reason. What was it? Tell me, before I grow cross.
Oh, I believe they didn’t tell you. But, though I think you like to pretend otherwise, dumb is one thing you are not. You know more than you’re saying, so answer me. Please. Why does the king want me dead?
{stunned} That’s- that’s it? Of all the petty, arrogant, stupid- I’m not even going to bother trying with that. {snort} And humans use dragons as symbols of greed.
{explaining something obvious} Yes. Because I like gold, its color, its luster. And because I enjoy living comfortably. {disgust} Not just… to have more than others.
Even if you don’t want to concede the difference, surely it does not escape you that I earned all of this, not just killed its old owner and stole it.
{offended} Of course I did! The very idea of taking something unearned… ugh.
{considering} You really know so little of my kind…
All of this, though… brings us back to you. You were sent here, presumably because you’re the kingdom’s best knight, the one with the highest chance of victory. You weren’t given any backup because there’s only one Fangbane. And you were fed a lie about me slaughtering innocents to make the job go down easier, but something in you knew that it was a lie. Tell me, am I hitting the mark with these?
So, my question becomes… why didn’t you? You had me at the point of your blade, and with a sword like that and skills like yours, you could’ve done it. If you wanted me dead, I would be, draconic magic and might notwithstanding. Instead, all I have is a scratch on my snout- {venomous} yes, that is the scar on my nose. Injuries do carry over, thank you so much for noticing.
{curious} And now you’re sorry. I don’t think I understand you at all, no matter how hard I try. Please, answer me. I want to.
Wha- {sigh} {exasperated} Well, if you were so certain it was a lie, why come here in the first place? If you felt you were given unjust orders, you could’ve just left the kingdom. Plenty of other places need knights, and there’s always work to be found as a sellsword. You risked much to gain… nothing, as best as I can see.
{dangerous} He… he what?
The king threatened to…
{cold} No. No, that is unacceptable.
No one threatens my human.
Yes, my human. I- {sigh} {warmer} I believe an explanation is in order. You see, I finally figured out what I’ve been feeling these past few days. At first, I thought it might be love, and, well, I suppose it is, of a kind: hoarding instinct. I feel hoarding instinct when I look at you. I saw you for the first time, and something in me just knew. You are the most precious treasure in this entire cavern, and I need to protect and keep you until the end of time, like the work of art you are.
{worried} Ohh, that’s not a good expression. Did I say something wrong? Come on too strong? I promise, living here won’t be bad at all, it’s quite a comfortable lair, whether I’m in human form or dragon. I maintain a good relationship with the villagers, too, so we can even go down to Wylgrith on day trips, as long as you don’t try to leave. You understand the importance of that, I trust.
{calming} No, no, don’t get all worked up. There’s no need to do something we’ll both regret.
Please, calm down. We’re both rational people, let’s discuss this as such.
{harder} Human, I don’t want to put you to sleep again. Don’t make me.
{pleased} Good, that’s much better. Now, what are your objections?
Mhm, mhm… {logical} Well, in point of fact, no, you don’t have a home anymore. If you go back without proof of my demise, the king will have you executed, will he not?
As I thought. So there’s nowhere else for you to be. As to your next point, of course I won’t keep you as a pet, you’re a sentient human. You have your own free will, thoughts, ideas, desires, the whole package. You would never be a pet. You will be my treasure. Very different thing, and it means I will want to keep you close, keep you safe, and stare at your radiance for as long as draconically possible.
{considering} Well, no, I haven’t heard of this. A living part of a dragon’s hoard? I believe it’s unprecedented, since nothing but gold lasts forever. Nevertheless, we’ll figure something out, we can make it work. And this doesn’t reflect strangely on me, you needn’t worry. I am one of the eldest dragons of this age, the young are used to my… peculiarities by now.
{pleased} Ah, yes, I wondered when we would get to that point. No, as a matter of fact, the king will not be sending other knights, or mages, or armies after me. I will not be killed like that, and you will not be reclaimed by them. And do you wish to know why?
{colder than ice} Because I am going to burn this kingdom to the ground. {amused} Naturally. I could overlook the attempt on my life - it brought me the most precious treasure I have ever known, after all, - I could forgive the use of Fangbane, since now I can make sure it never harms one of my kind again, I could even somewhat tolerate the blatant lies spread about me as flimsy justification. {angry} What I cannot accept, however, is what they have done to you. Threats on your life, on your body, on those you protect, promises of execution, forcing you to stain your soul against your will… no. No one is permitted to harm my human and live. This will, I admit, be something of a first for dragonkind, actually killing humans instead of protecting them is practically unheard of. I may even face repercussions from my kind for this. I find it hard to care, though, these ones are only getting what they deserve, for their actions or their complacence.
Now you’re getting upset again. {soothing} Don’t worry, this isn’t a sign of my outlook changing. I still have no desire to harm humans, and the village is perfectly safe.
We were communicating so well a second ago, if we could return to that, I would be grateful.
I promise you, this shouting and carrying on is nothing but counterproductive.
{tired} Lady knight, if you are not capable of being objective, I will be forced to- oh, forget it.
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{gentle} {slowly fading out} I truly am sorry to do this to you, but I can’t have you fighting me on this. I don’t want you to be upset at me, treasure, so, by the time you wake, the cause of this contention will be gone.
Shh, shh. It’s okay. It’s just a simple sleep spell, you’ll wake up comfortable and well-rested.
There. It will all be fixed before you awaken. Don’t worry, my treasure, nothing will ever harm you again.

Intro: For your distinguished service to the crown, you’ve been assigned the difficult and dangerous job of slaying a dragon purported to have slaughtered a village on the outskirts of the kingdom. It’s a job you should be able to handle, and you’re not too scared… now, if only the whole thing felt less wrong…
Summary: Listener meets a new acquaintance who befriends him, and offers to guide him where he needs to go. They face a danger together, and he learns that she is not what she seems.
Go ahead and monetize, it's fine. Word count is about 3800.
If you fill this or plan to fill this, please notify me. Please don't make edits without asking first.
TWs: Running deception, combat, discussion of mass murder (dragon burning places to the ground), possessiveness, forced sleep
Line breaks represent the listener talking or space where no one talks and should be short pauses, words within {brackets} represent the speaker’s tone or sfx. At ellipses, the speaker trails off, and at dashes, she is either cut off abruptly by the listener or by herself.
Author’s Note: God, this took way too long to write. A couple months, if you count when I had the idea and when I wrote the first few sentences. Well, it’s here now, and I hope it’s not too disappointing. Prequel series go!
If you want to read this somewhere other than Reddit, it's also here.
M4F Version here.
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{internal monologue} {disgusted} Ugh, those damn livestock merchants charge more every time. Gouging bastards, {rationalization} but I do need them to stay silent. If the town finds out how much food I have to purchase every month, it’ll only end badly. Besides, it’s not like even this much bribery makes a dent in my hoard. I should really just be glad I haven’t met any merchants with integrity, that wouldn’t end well. Good thing it’s a vanishingly rare trait these days… {annoyance} wait, no, that’s not a good thing, what am I saying? It’s sad… but it does make my life easier. Well, that’s a hell of a conundrum. {sigh} {bored} Not one I haven’t dealt with before, though. Have this conversation with myself every time. Oh, well. What matters is the food’ll be delivered soon, I don’t have to go into hibernation, and the merchants won’t talk. Anything else I wanted to do before heading home? Hmm… I think I wanted to stop at the spice merchant, see how much- {interest} HELlo. Who is that?
{curiosity} What would a knight be doing here? I mean, I suppose the goblin raids have been getting more brazen, but the town guards seem to have it handled, I haven’t even needed to get involved yet. I guess he could be here about that, but it doesn’t feel right. Maybe he’s just passing through? Well, best way to find out is to go talk to-
{quiet} Oh, damn. That’s- oh, damn. Fuck, he’s hot. {forced calm} Okay, composure. You are an all-powerful dragon. You will not be thrown off your game by one mortal, no matter how shiny his armor is. And it’s only his armor you’ll be looking at, right? Right. Ignore that beautiful face, you just need to find out what he’s doing here, not-
{suspicious} Wait. Who’s he talking to? {upset} The spice merchant? And she’s BLUSHING? Uh-uh. No. Not gonna fly.
{out loud} {sickly sweet} Hiiiii, hello! It’s me again, I’m here to pick up some- Oh? Who’s this? A new friend?
Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were having a conversation. Please, continue. I can wait.
{cough}
Oh, no, don’t mind me, just looking at… cumin. My, this smells awfully strong.
So sorry to barge in again, uh, I would like to buy these.
Are you leaving? Well, it was lovely to meet you.
{internal monologue} Okay, let me just finish up here, and I can go talk to him.
{pleased} Hah! Look frustrated, spice skank. Serves you right. {confused} Wait, do I know your name? Have I ever asked your name? Eh, doesn’t matter right now, I don’t need to know everyone in the village. {disgust} Especially not someone who flirts with- {confusion} Wait, what am I doing? I don’t have any claim over some random knight, why am I acting like this?
{frustrated noise} Figure out internal dilemma later, find human now. Where’d he go?
Agh! Curse this mortal form’s short legs, I can’t see- wait! Shiny!
{out loud} Hey! Hey! Wait up!
{out of breath} Whew… Thought I was gonna… gonna lose you… for a minute.
Thanks. Only need… a few seconds…
{composed} Hi. I’m Tiamat*.* Sorry to chase after you like that, but I realized I didn’t catch your name?
Oh, that’s a lovely name. It suits you.
{pleased} Oh, flatterer. {internal monologue} He’s smooth, isn’t he? I was expecting all muscle, no brain. I understand why the spice merchant was blushing now, I guess. {out loud} I just wanted to ask you… uh, I wanted to ask you what you were doing at the spice merchant’s? Usually passers-through don’t stop there when they can get their salt cheaper elsewhere.
Oh, that’s interesting! I didn’t know you could find that here.
Oh, no, I don’t spend very much time there. I mostly go in, buy what I need for my next few weeks of meals, and leave. Other places to be. More important places.
{laugh} Well. You certainly know the way to a woman’s heart. {internal monologue} A knight with both manners and a sense of humor… who’d have thought?
{out loud} Wonderful. So, what brings you to Wylgrith? It’s not a large settlement by any means, and well out of the way of… everything, really. What reason would a mighty royal knight have for stopping by? Were you sent to handle the goblins that-
{stunned} …Say what now?
The dragon? You were sent to kill the DRAGON?
Can you… not?
{off-balance} I mean- uh- Well, I don’t see why you would, do I? After all, the dragon hasn’t been seen or heard from in years, right? And even before that she didn’t harm any humans for decades. She-
I- uhhh… I guess I’m guessing she’s a ‘she?’ I did see her once, flying overhead, though, and she looked like a girl dragon. Kind of slender.
I… suppose ‘it’ works as well, yeah. {quiet, sad} A little hurtful, though…
{back on track} Nothing, nothing. So, why are you killing the dragon, again? I don’t think… it… has even harmed a human in living memory.
{sputtering} What? No it didn’t!
I- I think I would know if it burned down a village. I mean, this place is still standing, right?
A different- Well, I’m sure she wouldn’t have done anything like-
{quickly} No, no, I don’t know. It’s not like I’ve met the thing, right? But it hasn’t burned down this village, so why would-
{tentative} Oh. They said that?
Right to the king?
Right in the middle of court, where everyone could hear it?
{sad} I guess that settles that, then. The dragon needs to die.
{internal monologue} Damn. What a waste of such a handsome knight. There’s no chance he could possibly beat me on his own, so he’s going to end up- wait, on his own?
{out loud} {confused} And the king sent you? Alone, I mean? No army, or squad of knights, or cadre of mages? Why would he do that?
{awed} Oh. Oh, that is a very magic sword.
Well, no, I haven’t. But- but you can just tell, can’t you? It’s glowing! And it’s covered in some kind of weird letters, those have to be magical, right?
{internal monologue} {hesitant} Okay. That’s somewhat worrying. Even with all the useless sigils and that pointless glow siphoning its energy, I can feel the power rippling off that thing. Where did he ever find- No, that doesn’t matter. Could it level the playing field? Give him a chance? Hard to tell, I think, my senses in this form aren’t as-
{out loud} I’m sorry, what? I was distracted. Uh- it’s a very pretty sword.
{taken aback} That’s- that’s a good name for it. Very dangerous-sounding.
{internal monologue}{stressed} ARE YOU KIDDING ME? FANGBANE? HE FOUND FANGBANE? HOW IN THE- {forced composure} no, I’m calm, I’m calm, it’s fine. It’s not worrying at all that he has the most dangerous dragon-slaying sword ever forged. Wow, this very quickly went from “I don’t want to fight him, I don’t want to kill him” to “I don’t want to fight him, I don’t want to die.” Okay, time to nip this in the bud.
{out loud} Wow, it’s done that much? I never would’ve guessed that, it looks much too fancy for that. So… you can actually kill the dragon?
{hesitant} You’re right, I suppose. If it burned a village, it does deserve that. Well… *{resolve}*Do you know how to find its lair?
No, it’s not. If it was, everyone would be constantly in there robbing the hoard, wouldn’t we? Everyone knows that the lair is somewhere on the mountain, but no one knows where.
{triumph} Yes. Except me. And I’ll guide you there.
{reasonable} We already agreed, right? If it burned down a village, killed that many people, it needs to be put down. I want to help with that, and besides, you need someone to take you there. You’ll never find it on your own, so you can’t be too choosy about who you bring, can you?
I like hiking, and the mountain isn’t dangerous if you’ve known what you were doing since you were a child. I found it once, but I ran immediately, because I didn’t want to risk angering the dragon. I think I can find it again, but it’ll be a long trip. Three days at minimum.
{internal monologue} {satisfied} Perfect. A few days wandering in the forest should discourage him, maybe I can even convince him I didn’t burn any village. {confused} Why would he have been told… {moving on} Doesn’t matter right now. What matters is getting him off my trail, and maybe getting to know him in the meantime… {upset} No! Stop that! Bad Tiamat! He’s literally trying to kill you. He is not a prospective mate, he isn’t even another dragon!
{sigh} {wistful} He is handsome, though, especially when the light catches his armor like that… No! Stop!
{out loud} {serious} We should set out soon, then. Do you have enough provisions for the trip?
Good, good. No time to waste, come on.
You’re hunting a dragon. A dragon. Don’t you think it might be wise to move before she- it catches wind of your presence?
Let’s go, then.
{some indicator of a time skip}
{amused} What, don’t tell me you’re getting tired? We’ve only been hiking for a couple hours today, aren’t you supposed to be a big, strong knight?
You could take off the armor, if it’s that hot.
{concession} All right, your decision. And I suppose wearing the armor was helpful when the tangler tree tried to grab you. Fine, we’ll stop for a bit.
How much is left in your waterskin?
Good, good. Mine’s pretty full, I haven’t felt thirsty in a while.
No, we’re definitely going in the right direction. {grasping at straws} I recognize… uh, that rock! Yeah. See how it kinda looks like a bear, if you tilt your head?
Really? Well, I see it. Anyway, I remember seeing that before. We’re about a day’s walk away from the lair, I’m almost certain.
You know, you never asked why I decided to hike in a random direction for three days. {internal monologue} {pleased} I have such a good story for it, too. It’ll leave you crying, and then maybe I can-
{out loud} {taken aback} You do?
What? You’re a royal knight, one of the most honored positions in the land. Why would you feel the need to escape?
{internal monologue} What? What was that? There for a second and then gone, was that… a crack in the charming exterior?
{out loud} No, no, I understand the feeling. I just… didn’t expect it from this quarter. Is something wrong at court? Are you-
{inner monologue} {protective} Oh… Oh his eyes… So sad… What did they do to you, my knight?
{out loud} Please, anything you can-
{confused} What? What’s wrong?
No, I’m not going to shush, we’re talking, and-
{muffled} Mmph! MMMMPH!
{inner monologue} {angy} This presumptuous human dares lay his hand on ME? I don’t care what might be inside him, I’m going to make it outside- {considering} Wait. What’s that noise?
That doesn’t sound like- oh. Oh, those are goblins. And he wanted me to be quiet, and now they heard us, and- oops. Why did I not sense them coming? Goblins wouldn’t know stealth if it snuck up behind them and ripped their legs off, I should’ve heard them from miles away. This doesn’t make any sense… Oh, well. I suppose it doesn’t matter, in the grand scheme of things. Just a few more goblins to kill. If he’d just let go of me… wait, but I don’t want to reveal myself. That makes this much more difficult. Can I kill all these green idiots in my human form? {concerned} Oh, wow, that’s… a worrying amount. Where are they all coming from? All right, I think I can take- wait, what? Human? What are you doing?
{out loud} Why are you getting in front of me? That is far too many goblins for any human to handle, we need to run!
{internal monologue} {flustered} Wha? What does he mean by that? And why does he have to be this handsome as he says it? That’s unfair!
{out loud} No- you can’t-
{internal monologue} {upset} Oh, the stupid, brave, self-sacrificial idiot! He’s gonna get himself killed if I don’t help him- wait, what?
{taken aback} He’s- oh, wow, that’s quite impressive. That’s- wow. I’ve never seen a human fight like that.
{confused} Huh? Why’s he looking back… Is he angry? What?
He’s yelling something… He wants me to run? Wha- {realization} OHHHHH- He thinks I’m in danger, and he’s trying to protect me! He wants to- {touched} aw. That’s the sweetest thing… My heart- {serious} I need to keep this knight alive.
{realization} Oh! I have to pretend to be running, yes. I can’t help him here, much as I want to. Besides, it looks like he has it handled. Those goblins aren’t laying a claw on him, somehow. Guess it was a good decision to wear the armor.
{planning} I’ll come back for him later, and he can be happy that he kept me safe, and maybe I can use that to find out what’s wrong with him, oh, looks like he’s just about finished with those- {shock} wut.
What is that.
That’s a- that’s a freaking hellhound! What in the Low Realms is a hellhound doing here?
{protective} Okay, no, unacceptable. I am not risking my treasure- {concerned} the human. The human! Why did I just think of him as- never mind, time for that later.
{whoosh sfx}
{roar}
{desperate} Oh no, please don’t let me be too late…
{out loud} {furious} Stay away from my human!
{crunch sfx}
{triumph} Hah. That’ll teach you.
Did you get the last of the goblins, sir kni- {wary} What are you doing.
Put that sword down, please, I’m not your enemy.
Okay, no, no, calm down, there’s no need to get worked up.
This isn’t helping anything, can we just talk?
{upset} OW! All right, this has gone far enough
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{sigh} {fading out} What am I going to do with you?
{some indicator of a time skip}
{cordial} Good morning, sir knight. As promised, I brought you to my lair.
Oh, yes, you must be confused.
{whoosh sfx}
There, is that better?
{resigned} Yes. It was me the whole time.
No, it wasn’t. If it had been a game, you would be dead right now. Instead you’re alive, unharmed, even unrestrained, in the middle of my hoard.
Or didn’t you notice?
{amused} Yes, I thought that might get your attention. Being surrounded by enough gold to fill a palace ten times over generally does the trick where humans are involved, or so I am informed.
{annoyed} Fangbane? The sword that slew more of my kind in two years than any other managed in thousands? You want it back?
Tch, no, but I would’ve if I could. That butcher’s blade should’ve been melted down long ago. Alas, it was impervious even to my fire.
I thought that was clear: no, you can’t have it back. You can have another sword, even a magic one, but not that atrocity forged in steel.
{considering} That would seem to be the question of the hour, yes. “What are you doing here.” Well… why don’t you tell me? You were sent to kill me, that much is clear. But much more isn’t. I would like… an explanation.
{annoyed} Oh, come on. You’ve been interacting with me for days now. Do I really seem like the type of person who burns down villages at random? That excuse is worthless… and… {suspicious} I think we both know it. You were sent here for some other reason. What was it? Tell me, before I grow cross.
Oh, I believe they didn’t tell you. But, though I think you like to pretend otherwise, dumb is one thing you are not. You know more than you’re saying, so answer me. Please. Why does the king want me dead?
{stunned} That’s- that’s it? Of all the petty, arrogant, stupid- I’m not even going to bother trying with that. {snort} And humans use dragons as symbols of greed.
{explaining something obvious} Yes. Because I like gold, its color, its luster. And because I enjoy living comfortably. {disgust} Not just… to have more than others.
Even if you don’t want to concede the difference, surely it does not escape you that I earned all of this, not just killed its old owner and stole it.
{offended} Of course I did! The very idea of taking something unearned… ugh.
{considering} You really know so little of my kind…
All of this, though… brings us back to you. You were sent here, presumably because you’re the kingdom’s best knight, the one with the highest chance of victory. You weren’t given any backup because there’s only one Fangbane. And you were fed a lie about me slaughtering innocents to make the job go down easier, but something in you knew that it was a lie. Tell me, am I hitting the mark with these?
So, my question becomes… why didn’t you? You had me at the point of your blade, and with a sword like that and skills like yours, you could’ve done it. If you wanted me dead, I would be, draconic magic and might notwithstanding. Instead, all I have is a scratch on my snout- {venomous} yes, that is the scar on my nose. Injuries do carry over, thank you so much for noticing.
{curious} And now you’re sorry. I don’t think I understand you at all, no matter how hard I try. Please, answer me. I want to.
Wha- {sigh} {exasperated} Well, if you were so certain it was a lie, why come here in the first place? If you felt you were given unjust orders, you could’ve just left the kingdom. Plenty of other places need knights, and there’s always work to be found as a sellsword. You risked much to gain… nothing, as best as I can see.
{dangerous} He… he what?
The king threatened to…
{cold} No. No, that is unacceptable.
No one threatens my human.
Yes, my human. I- {sigh} {warmer} I believe an explanation is in order. You see, I finally figured out what I’ve been feeling these past few days. At first, I thought it might be love, and, well, I suppose it is, of a kind: hoarding instinct. I feel hoarding instinct when I look at you. I saw you for the first time, and something in me just knew. You are the most precious treasure in this entire cavern, and I need to protect and keep you until the end of time, like the work of art you are.
{worried} Ohh, that’s not a good expression. Did I say something wrong? Come on too strong? I promise, living here won’t be bad at all, it’s quite a comfortable lair, whether I’m in human form or dragon. I maintain a good relationship with the villagers, too, so we can even go down to Wylgrith on day trips, as long as you don’t try to leave. You understand the importance of that, I trust.
{calming} No, no, don’t get all worked up. There’s no need to do something we’ll both regret.
Please, calm down. We’re both rational people, let’s discuss this as such.
{harder} Human, I don’t want to put you to sleep again. Don’t make me.
{pleased} Good, that’s much better. Now, what are your objections?
Mhm, mhm… {logical} Well, in point of fact, no, you don’t have a home anymore. If you go back without proof of my demise, the king will have you executed, will he not?
As I thought. So there’s nowhere else for you to be. As to your next point, of course I won’t keep you as a pet, you’re a sentient human. You have your own free will, thoughts, ideas, desires, the whole package. You would never be a pet. You will be my treasure. Very different thing, and it means I will want to keep you close, keep you safe, and stare at your radiance for as long as draconically possible.
{considering} Well, no, I haven’t heard of this. A living part of a dragon’s hoard? I believe it’s unprecedented, since nothing but gold lasts forever. Nevertheless, we’ll figure something out, we can make it work. And this doesn’t reflect strangely on me, you needn’t worry. I am one of the eldest dragons of this age, the young are used to my… peculiarities by now.
{pleased} Ah, yes, I wondered when we would get to that point. No, as a matter of fact, the king will not be sending other knights, or mages, or armies after me. I will not be killed like that, and you will not be reclaimed by them. And do you wish to know why?
{colder than ice} Because I am going to burn this kingdom to the ground.{amused} Naturally. I could overlook the attempt on my life - it brought me the most precious treasure I have ever known, after all, - I could forgive the use of Fangbane, since now I can make sure it never harms one of my kind again, I could even somewhat tolerate the blatant lies spread about me as flimsy justification. {angry} What I cannot accept, however, is what they have done to you. Threats on your life, on your body, on those you protect, promises of execution, forcing you to stain your soul against your will… no. No one is permitted to harm my human and live. This will, I admit, be something of a first for dragonkind, actually killing humans instead of protecting them is practically unheard of. I may even face repercussions from my kind for this. I find it hard to care, though, these ones are only getting what they deserve, for their actions or their complacence.
Now you’re getting upset again. {soothing} Don’t worry, this isn’t a sign of my outlook changing. I still have no desire to harm humans, and the village is perfectly safe.
We were communicating so well a second ago, if we could return to that, I would be grateful.
I promise you, this shouting and carrying on is nothing but counterproductive.
{tired} Sir knight, if you are not capable of being objective, I will be forced to- oh, forget it.
{magically resonant} Sleep.
{gentle} {slowly fading out} I truly am sorry to do this to you, but I can’t have you fighting me on this. I don’t want you to be upset at me, treasure, so, by the time you wake, the cause of this contention will be gone.
Shh, shh. It’s okay. It’s just a simple sleep spell, you’ll wake up comfortable and well-rested.
There. It will all be fixed before you awaken. Don’t worry, my treasure, nothing will ever harm you again.

Hey there! I am a 30 year old guy from Upstate New York looking for someone that wants to make an emotional connection.
A bit about me: I'm 6’1". I get height can be a big deal for some women so I think it's best to just put it out there first 😅 I've got black hair, brownish black eyes. Average body, I'm muscular and wanting to start exercising both for health and a little bit for better shape. I like to think I'm fairly attractive but then most of us grew up with a relative always telling us we were not handsome or cute, etc. we can share pictures once we establish some comfort zone. If education is important, I am a college graduate with post-graduation degree as well. Now working as Mechanical engineer.
I have to lead with the fact that I can be pretty sarcastic at times. I also joke and (playfully) tease. I'm pretty easy going/chill and I like to keep things light and fun, but also enjoy getting into the really deep conversations as well. I'm a sucker for the whole good morning and goodnight text thing as well as checking in on those busier days. That doesn’t mean we have to just message good morning and good night for the whole week. Haha. I think most important part of knowing someone via online platform is initial conversations and if you don’t have enough time let me know otherwise that conversation is dead in no time.
I love animals. I've always felt very connected and attached to them and just enjoy interacting with them. While I am more of a dog person pet-wise, cats are still pretty cool in my book. Cats are more complex though I love the mysterious nature.
Anything outdoors is great in my opinion. Just feel like going for a walk? Let's do it. I do kayaking a bit in the summers, fish, hike, go for drives. I have the habit of occasionally stopping and taking pictures of plants and flowers I see around (I'm always down to share!). While sending me message write code - “I4U” so that I know it’s someone who actually read my post. Didn’t write in the end cuz some people might just skip to end. This doesn’t mean that you just send me the code. I am strictly gonna monitor now. I have skimmed through soo many texts and my innocent heart always gives chances, I am gonna try to be little strict this time.
It's not just the outdoors I love. I can also get down with chill days at home binging something on Netflix or playing something on my PC. Let's face it, I'm a bit if a nerd (everyone has something nerd about themselves) and if you like Jurassic park, board games, Any Mafia movies, gaming, etc we will get along great. I'm a sucker for horror movies as well and am always looking for recommendations. I listen to a lot of music. I shouldn’t brag but I listen to english ,german, Spanish, french and Hindi songs. Born and brought up in India. Hence, hindi songs.
A bit about (possibly) you: I'd prefer if you were in some sort of professional environment and ambitious. I'm not extremely picky about things like hair and eye color. Height is also not a big deal. If you're alot smaller than me and worried that it's something you’ll be insecure about, it's not. The big thing for me is personality. I think personality can make us a lot more or a lot less attractive. I want someone that is genuinely kind and sweet, someone that likes to laugh, someone that's not afraid to be goofy.
A final note: I'm a single guy and looking for someone dynamic. Sometimes I can respond immediately and sometimes it takes a minute due to the obvious circumstances. I also don't expect you to respond immediately to every message, I get that we all have lives and can be busy at times. It would be awesome if you are up for a voice chat. And please when responding write something about yourself.
If any if this sounds remotely interesting to you, feel free to reach out via reddit dm or chat!

Hey there! I am a 30 year old guy from Upstate New York looking for someone that wants to make an emotional connection, and would like to put efforts into conversations.
A bit about me: I'm 6’1". I get height can be a big deal for some women so I think it's best to just put it out there first 😅 I've got black hair, brownish black eyes. Average body, I'm muscular and wanting to start exercising both for health and a little bit for better shape. I like to think I'm fairly attractive but then most of us grew up with a relative always telling us we were not handsome or cute, etc. we can share pictures once we establish some comfort zone. If education is important, I am a college graduate with post-graduation degree as well. Now working as an engineer.
I have to lead with the fact that I can be pretty sarcastic at times. I also joke and (playfully) tease. I'm pretty easy going/chill and I like to keep things light and fun, but also enjoy getting into the really deep conversations as well. I'm a sucker for the whole good morning and goodnight text thing as well as checking in on those busier days. That doesn’t mean we have to just message good morning and good night for the whole week. Haha. I think most important part of knowing someone via online platform is initial conversations and if you don’t have enough time let me know otherwise that conversation is dead in no time.
I love animals. I've always felt very connected and attached to them and just enjoy interacting with them. While I am more of a dog person pet-wise, cats are still pretty cool in my book. Cats are more complex though I love the mysterious nature.
Anything outdoors is great in my opinion. Just feel like going for a walk? Let's do it. I do kayaking a bit in the summers, fish, hike, go for drives. I have the habit of occasionally stopping and taking pictures of plants and flowers I see around (I'm always down to share!). While sending me message write code - “I3U” so that I know it’s someone who actually read my post. Didn’t write in the end cuz some people might just skip to end. This doesn’t mean that you just send me the code. I am strictly gonna monitor now. I have skimmed through soo many texts and my innocent heart always gives chances, I am gonna try to be little strict this time.
It's not just the outdoors I love. I can also get down with chill days at home binging something on Netflix or playing something on my PC. Let's face it, I'm a bit if a nerd (everyone has something nerd about themselves) and if you like Jurassic park, board games, Any Mafia movies, gaming, etc we will get along great. I'm a sucker for horror movies as well and am always looking for recommendations. I listen to a lot of music. I shouldn’t brag but I listen to english ,german, Spanish, french and Hindi songs. Born and brought up in India. Hence, hindi songs.
A bit about (possibly) you: I'd prefer if you were in some sort of professional environment and ambitious. I'm not extremely picky about things like hair and eye color. Height is also not a big deal. If you're alot smaller than me and worried that it's something you’ll be insecure about, it's not. The big thing for me is personality. I think personality can make us a lot more or a lot less attractive. I want someone that is genuinely kind and sweet, someone that likes to laugh, someone that's not afraid to be goofy.
A final note: I'm a single guy and looking for someone dynamic. Sometimes I can respond immediately and sometimes it takes a minute due to the obvious circumstances. I also don't expect you to respond immediately to every message, I get that we all have lives and can be busy at times. It would be awesome if you are up for a voice chat. And please please when responding write something about yourself.
If any if this sounds remotely interesting to you, feel free to reach out via reddit dm or chat!

Hey there! I am a 30 year old guy from Upstate New York looking for someone that wants to make an emotional connection.
A bit about me: I'm 6’1". I get height can be a big deal for some women so I think it's best to just put it out there first 😅 I've got black hair, brownish black eyes. Average body, I'm muscular and wanting to start exercising both for health and a little bit for better shape. I like to think I'm fairly attractive but then most of us grew up with a relative always telling us we were not handsome or cute, etc. we can share pictures once we establish some comfort zone. If education is important, I am a college graduate with post-graduation degree as well. Now working as an engineer.
I have to lead with the fact that I can be pretty sarcastic at times. I also joke and (playfully) tease. I'm pretty easy going/chill and I like to keep things light and fun, but also enjoy getting into the really deep conversations as well. I'm a sucker for the whole good morning and goodnight text thing as well as checking in on those busier days. That doesn’t mean we have to just message good morning and good night for the whole week. Haha. I think most important part of knowing someone via online platform is initial conversations and if you don’t have enough time let me know otherwise that conversation is dead in no time.
I love animals. I've always felt very connected and attached to them and just enjoy interacting with them. While I am more of a dog person pet-wise, cats are still pretty cool in my book. Cats are more complex though I love the mysterious nature.
Anything outdoors is great in my opinion. Just feel like going for a walk? Let's do it. I do kayaking a bit in the summers, fish, hike, go for drives. I have the habit of occasionally stopping and taking pictures of plants and flowers I see around (I'm always down to share!). While sending me message write code - “I2U” so that I know it’s someone who actually read my post. Didn’t write in the end cuz some people might just skip to end. This doesn’t mean that you just send me the code. I am strictly gonna monitor now. I have skimmed through soo many texts and my innocent heart always gives chances, I am gonna try to be little strict this time.
It's not just the outdoors I love. I can also get down with chill days at home binging something on Netflix or playing something on my PC. Let's face it, I'm a bit if a nerd (everyone has something nerd about themselves) and if you like Jurassic park, board games, Any Mafia movies, gaming, etc we will get along great. I'm a sucker for horror movies as well and am always looking for recommendations. I listen to a lot of music. I shouldn’t brag but I listen to english ,german, Spanish, french and Hindi songs. Born and brought up in India. Hence, hindi songs.
A bit about (possibly) you: I'd prefer if you were in some sort of professional environment and ambitious. I'm not extremely picky about things like hair and eye color. Height is also not a big deal. If you're alot smaller than me and worried that it's something you’ll be insecure about, it's not. The big thing for me is personality. I think personality can make us a lot more or a lot less attractive. I want someone that is genuinely kind and sweet, someone that likes to laugh, someone that's not afraid to be goofy.
A final note: I'm a single guy and looking for someone dynamic. Sometimes I can respond immediately and sometimes it takes a minute due to the obvious circumstances. I also don't expect you to respond immediately to every message, I get that we all have lives and can be busy at times. It would be awesome if you are up for a voice chat. And please when responding write something about yourself.
If any if this sounds remotely interesting to you, feel free to reach out via reddit dm or chat!

Made a post recently asking for all of your "hidden gem" or underrated roguelikes/lites that you have played.
You guys gave me so many amazing recommendations, and I really wanna thank all of you for that, and I hope some of you found some games to try with that thread as well!
I wound up picking up a lot of new roguelites I hadn't played, Fury Unleashed being one of those.
It's funny, cause I had heard of Fury Unleashed before having it mentioned by a few people in that thread, however I just assumed it was kind of a meh game cause I always see it discounted to basically nothing on the Nintendo Switch eshop. (Which in the past has led to me purchasing literal trash rogeulites before lmao). However after seeing it mentioned a couple times in the thread i decided to give it a shot, but I got it on PC as it looked like it would be better played with mouse and keyboard (I was right lol)
I gotta say, wow this game has blown me away so far. I absolutely love the comic book story they went for, following the author's troubles as his comic becomes less and less popular. The idea of playing as a character in a comic is sweet, and it is done very very well here.
The gameplay just feels so satisfying, dashing around meleeing everything, or staying back and shooting from afar feels very satisfying. I love how the weapons can have little modifiers on them that make them different each time, and the grenades and special abilities are really fun as well!
If i had to have any gripes, I would say the item variety besides the weapons (since those can have different attributes) is pretty low for a roguelite. Weirdly however, It doesn't bother me as much in this game as it would others (which is very rare btw, I usually hate games with little to no item variety) since every run still winds up feeling different enough for me, and the gameplay is good enough to justify it.
With all of this being said I'm only a few hours in so far, however compared to the other roguelites I picked up recently, this is the one that I have played the most which I DID NOT expect at all to be the case.
So TLDR, would highl;y highly recommend this game if it looks at all interesting to you! (It does seem like it wouldn't play as well on controller though, so probably buy on pc if you do get it)

Goal: Create a heartfelt animated music video Song: TheFatRat - Still Here With You Tone: Happy, Sad, Sweet, Touching, Moving, Inspiring, Beautiful, Spiritual Style: 2D cute cartoon/anime Length: About two and a half minutes to fit the song (more is fine, adding a short intro/outro to fit the story is welcome) Deadline: 2 Months (flexible) Budget: $3,000 (flexible)
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Sorry if the deadline/budget seems unreasonable. I am very flexible on both and am more than willing to work with someone on a fair price.
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I would like to have a music video created for my fiancée, Emily, starring her and one of our cats, Fawkes, who we helped cross the rainbow bridge in February 2023. We always get the feeling he's still here with us, watching over us, spreading his love and joy. I want to imagine what that would look like if it were indeed true. On a spiritual level, they were/are truly soulmates, and I want to create something really special for her to remember him by. These last few years have been really tough for her, and we have been abandoned/betrayed by some friends and family mainly due to drama around our caring for Fawkes.
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I am looking for someone passionate who truly wants to help me make this a reality. I will do everything in my power to get whatever you need to make this work. This is probably way too much info, but I'm trying to get my thoughts out if it can help the creative process for anyone. If you're interested, please send me a message.
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Factoids:

• Me: 33M
• Emily: 34F
• Emily and Fawkes slept on the couch together during his sickness (he would always lay on her, face to face)
• Emily likes to paint as a hobby (shapes, flowers, birds, owls)
• Emily likes to play PC games (Overwatch, World of Warcraft)
• Emily is usually up at night while I'm asleep
• Emily has been free of work since before he got sick
• I work during the day, Emily is at home alone (she does not drive)
• We still randomly find his fur on our clothes that have been washed multiple times since he passed. It makes us smile and think of it as a gift from him.
• Fawkes and Freyja didn't get along unsupervised, so we kept them separated when we slept or had to go somewhere
• Freyja sometimes acts like Fawkes did (belly rubs and lots of snuggles). We feel as though it's Fawkes visiting us through her.

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Thoughts, ideas, notes:

• Possibly starting from when we are at/leaving the vet when we said goodbye
• Fawkes depicted as an angel/spirit cat
• Centered around Fawkes and Emily
• Emily doing day-to-day things like watching TV, painting, playing games, chores
• Emily looking at pictures and feeling sad
• Emily feeling hopeless and alone
• Freyja and I can be part of making her feel better sometimes
• I go to work and she's all alone
• Fawkes finding ways to cheer up/help Emily, somehow interacting with things around her
• I want it to express feelings of sadness at points but also happiness and joy
• Locations closely based on actual places we went/live (I can provide pictures of where we live or addresses of locations for Google Maps for satellite views)
• Ending: I would like to show Fawkes with her family dog (who passed away in September 2021) and her grandmother (who passed away in January 2024), all happy together and watching over Emily

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backstory below
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Beginning:
Fawkes came into our lives in July 2017 from the streets after his previous owners were taken away from him a few weeks prior. We immediately brought him to the vet to get checked and tested for anything. The vet found that he was chipped and five years old. As a result, they couldn't really do much besides try to contact the previous owners. We took him home and kept him separated from our other cat, Freyja, since we did not know if he could spread anything to her. He was pretty lethargic, hardly eating, and couldn't really keep much down. We honestly thought we would wake up the next morning and he wouldn't be with us anymore. Luckily, that was not the case.
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He wasn't doing so well the next day, so we called the vet and they had us come in again. Since the previous day, he went from over seven pounds down to about six and a half pounds. Our vet decided it was necessary to medically intervene or he was likely going to die. They hospitalized him on the spot and started giving him subcutaneous (SQ) fluids and other medications to help with his nausea and stimulate his appetite. We left him under the care of the vet and all we could do was wait to hear back. He pulled through like a champ. He was eating, moving, jumping, playing, snuggling, and loving life. It was as if he was reborn, like a phoenix from the ashes, so we named him "Fawkes" after the phoenix from Harry Potter.
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Over the following years, Fawkes and Emily became pretty much inseparable. He was such a lovebug and radiated that classic "orange cat energy" wherever he went. If he wanted to get into something, he'd either find a way or keep trying until we could stop him. He absolutely LOVED belly rubs, and not once was it ever a trap (unless you felt "trapped" rubbing his belly for hours). In all the time we had him, he never hissed at, scratched, or bit (non-playfully) anyone. He just wanted to love everything and everyone he met. He didn't have any enemies in his eyes, just others who may not have cared for the level of love and joy he wanted to share.
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Later:
Fawkes was diagnosed with stage 1 chronic kidney disease (CKD) in October 2021, which quickly progressed to stage 3 by early 2022. We were giving him medicine a few times a day, SQ fluids every couple of days, and going to the vet every other week to have his levels checked. He became a regular at the vet and even a few employees confessed to taking breaks just to go snuggle him because they loved him so much. We almost said goodbye to him in May 2022, as his symptoms were worsening and he no longer wanted to eat. He was a fighter, though, and told us he wasn't done fighting yet by finally eating on his own just as we were trying to make that difficult decision. We took him to the Animal Emergency and Referral Center (AERC) that night.
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The vet told us that he had developed anemia and our only options were either to take him home and start end-of-life care or do a blood transfusion (which might not even work) and keep him hospitalized for a few days to be monitored. We opted for the blood transfusion. The procedure went well and we were able to come and visit him a day later, though they still had to keep him for another day or two just to be safe. We were also able to have his case looked at by a specialist, and they adjusted his meds to better suit his needs. They were estimating he maybe had a few weeks to a month or so before we ended up back where we were before the transfusion. We were now giving him less medicine a few times a day, SQ fluids every night, and going on walks through our apartment building every night before bed.
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A few weeks became a few months, and he seemed to be doing even better than he was all of 2022 before his transfusion. We would take him on trips to Petco every week or so, so he could walk around and meet new friends. We would bring him to the park while we played Pokémon GO, even if we ended up just sitting in the car. Starting around September 2022, my boss even let me bring him to work with me on days he wanted me in the office. Vet appointments were few and far between, sometimes a couple of months apart. This pretty much continued all the way into February 2023 until we started to notice more significant symptoms again, and his CKD values were getting much worse. He didn't want to eat, he was hiding more, and he would often seek comfort by laying in his litterbox. We could tell our little warrior was ready to be done fighting.
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Goodbye:
On the night of Tuesday, February 14th, 2023, Valentine's Day, we decided we couldn't make him fight for us any longer. We called our vet and made an appointment for Thursday, February 16th, 2023. We spent the whole day together on Wednesday, February 15th, 2023, snuggling on the couch and finished with our nightly routine of SQ fluids and a walk. We all spent the night together on the couch, staying awake as long as we could. On Thursday, February 16th, 2023, we brought Fawkes to the vet, and he was excited to walk around and explore the new space for a short while before needing a rest. It was nice to see him perk up and act like how we remembered him to be. The doctors took him away to be prepped and brought him back after a short while. We were petting him, kissing him, and told him he was a good boy and how much we loved him as he peacefully passed. We left there with the heaviest pet carrier ever. An empty one.