Kindergarten read write and say worksheets

I'd been reading this fanfic that I really enjoyed, but the grammatical errors were glaring. But I keep coming back to it. It has some very cliche tropes and ideas, but it was doing it for me...but I felt like maybe I could do it better. One night after reading before bed, I decided to try and make my own spin on these tropes. I was so excited to start that I had trouble falling asleep.
I've spent a lot of time in the last couple weeks brainstorming and planning. My story has obvious similarities, but I think it would truly stand on its own and I'm really proud of my new WIP baby.
I've written a small outline of facts about the characters and their backstory, and a few sentences about how the characters see and feel about each other. I've also written about 2k words so far.
The best part? For the first time in ages, I'm excited to flesh out this story. And for the first time ever, I don't know if I'll ever publish it. Maybe way down the line, someday. But so far I'm writing this for myself, not thinking about comments or kudos or tags or word count. I'm not desperate to put it out there to get interaction to keep me motivated, my motivation is seeing where it goes.
People have been telling me for years to write for myself and not for others. I would scratch my head, confusedly ask, "how???" and then go back to working sporadically, much more off than on. But right now I'm writing this for my own enjoyment, and it's so novel to me. I love my little WIP baby so far. I have plans, and I'm excited to see what I come up with. I'm just so excited for the future of this story and I want to celebrate the fact that I finally found the story that I want to write just for myself.

Long post, apologies in advance. My son has been going to therapy for about a year now and he has a great rapport with his female therapist. By all accounts she has helped him with his big feelings and we were looking to continue sessions with her since my son is about to start middle school next fall.
My son has always had a morbid curiosity about horror movies. He have allowed him to see a couple scary PG13 movies only after we have seen them ourselves. He has not seen any R movies despite being aware of the titles of them and in some cases the plot/characters from friends at school.
In today’s session with his therapist, they were “building rapport” before talking about the sessions topics and my son asked her if she had seen the movie IT. She told him she only saw the first 20 seconds before turning it off and my son convinced her she needed to see the death of a certain character that happens at the beginning. He obviously knows more about this movie than we realized but he had not actually seen the scene.
She then proceeded to pull up the movie on her phone and they watched the first few minutes where a young boy is killed by the monster in the sewer. I have read the kids arm is pulled off as well which is particularly horrifying. She apparently turned it off immediately after the kid was killed.
My husband and I are pretty livid about this. We have been trying to let him be a kid for as long as possible and knowing he has something so violent in his mind now saddens us immensely.
We emailed her and shared our upset and gave her the opportunity to give her retelling of the events (and hopefully hear a contrite apology) but her response was not quite enough to make us feel she realized she fucked up.
She did apologize, but made some excuses like “he spoke like he had seen the movie so I assumed he had” and “I didn’t know it was rated R” while also saying going forward she will adjust how she goes about building rapport with her patients.
We are pretty sure we want to find a new therapist, but should we escalate what happened to her superiors? The irony is not lost on us that we sent our kid to therapy to process emotions and feelings only to have him potentially traumatized by watching a child being murdered on a movie with said therapist.
She obviously showed a huge lack of judgement (it could just as likely been a sex scene since neither of them had actually seen the movie. That would have potentially legal consequences) but we aren’t quite sure how far we should take it to make sure she doesn’t make the same mistake again with another kid.
Any thoughts? Are we overreacting? Should we take further action? Thanks in advance

Hi yall, I am really getting into music theory i am a fast learner so it is easy when the teachers talks about the theory it self but we also have in class some reading practices and when i do it i can read it but when it comes to tone it ( im spanish we say "entonar") i cant, those are sol-fa ( solfeos in pozzoli book ) but i can read it and be on time with the metronome and with the name of the notes on the music sheet but i cant sing it and my teacher takes it like i do it bad and he didnt teach us how to tone ( entonar ).
No, my instrument is not my voice my instrument is guitar, they do 2 classes per person 1 class is the courses where we learn music theory even if we use different instruments and the second class that we take personally with a teacher of our instruments ( 30 minutes just you and the teacher of your instrument). Just wanted to clarify that in case you might think i selected voice as my instrument before getting into the music academy.
Any help will be appreciated. :)

I just want to preface this by saying I'm a WH40K fan, but not incredibly deep into it. Many of personal friends love the game and sculpt, which got me into it, but I've always been a narrative person first and foremost. So I've read a decent chunk of the books, and I like to keep up with articles, this subreddit, and the occasional deep dive YT video. So if I get something wrong, I apologize. I fully admit I don't know anything.
Anyways, the idea that planets in 40K have something akin to a soul or unique presence in the Warp isn't (to my knowledge) something that gets brought up a lot, only once or twice throughout the series, and mainly in regards to Leman Russ and the Space Wolves who claim their sorcery comes from Fenris and not the Warp (something the White Scars also relate to with their space magic). Many people, and justifiably so, believe that this is kind of hogwash and that those Legions simply don't want to admit that they have Psykers who are linked to the Warp. However, there are some hints from what I have read that suggest these more spiritual and unique Space Marines are actually telling the truth in some capacity, and that leads me to an important question:
If every living creature has a presence in the Warp, and if combined belief in an individual can elevate that individual into becoming a God, then what does a communal belief, support of, and reliance on their planet do to said planet's relation to the Warp?
Because of this, I believe that every single planet in 40K that isn't completely barren has a strong presence in the Warp, because the thoughts and lives of not just sapient creatures like Humans or Eldar feeds these presences, but also the animals and plants that exist on that world as well. I would also argue that planets like Fenris, Caliban, and Chogoris have extremely strong Warp presences compared to planets like Ultramar due to how primal they are; the Humans on these worlds are more superstitious, tribal, and more geared towards survival than anything else you might value in a more modern society, and the animals are more vicious, intelligent, and larger than life than most you can find in the Imperium.
Due to the above it is entirely possible the Space Wolves and White Scars actually pull their psychic powers from their planets' Warp presence. Sure they're still technically pulling from the Warp itself, but from a more localized version of it spawned from the collective conditions and traditions of their home worlds. And because of the above, something I asked myself was "If God's, who have gigantic Warp presences, can have their own lesser beings spawned from them, then why wouldn't a planet that has a larger presence compared to that of a mortal, have them as well?"
I don't think the Watchers in the Dark are xenos. I also don't think they're demons. I think they are simply the Soul of Caliban made manifest on the planet, created from ancient parables of Fey-like creatures by the ancient inhabitants of the planet (to tie them into the Arthurian theme and inspiration of the Dark Angels and their home world), that test, try, punish, aid, and watch over everyone directly linked to Caliban. This is also why they still reside on the Rock and aid the Dark Angels even now, because it's a literal piece of Caliban.
You can even tie the Lion's new Forest Walk ability to the idea of Caliban's Warp Presence. When the world was shattered into pieces in real space the same thing happened in the Warp, and it's pieces were flung across the Immaterium. When the Lion teleports he is simply walking back and forth through Calibans fractured Warp presence, which deposits him on planets and places either reminiscent of Caliban or incredibly close to those fractured pieces in the Sea of Souls.
Anyways, that's my theory. Have a good night everyone.

This is more of a venting post but feel free to share thoughts if you have them..
Last week, I (37m) took routine STI tests as part of my 6-month appointment and was shocked to find that I tested positive for gonorrhea in my throat. I’ve only had one sexual partner since January so of course I immediately blamed him. We’ve been dating for several months so it stunned and hurt me to think he exposed me. The next day, I got treatment and was told to that I’ll need to test again at some point.
A full week after I received treatment I’m still dealing with what I have been thinking are classic symptoms. A full week later I decided to text my guy too, after taking space from him for some time. Despite everything going on, I still feel strongly about him and don’t want to lose what we’re building.
Now, when he responded saying he tested negative on everything I was thoroughly confused. It made me think that the test I took was faulty and that maybe what I’ve been feeling as symptoms is actually coming from something else. I should’ve known something was up because the positive result I got was only in my mouth and nowhere else, even though my guy and I did EVERYTHING together.
Doctors testing me didn’t ask much about my sexual activity and they didn’t seem to know why I tested positive in one area of my body but not the others that were certainly used 💅🏾.
I think the point I’m driving at is that it’s important to press our healthcare providers about discrepancies we see in test results. What im going through might not actually be what was revealed in my results and that’s unsettling. To not know and to question medical screening validity is scary because of the implications our health has on our life. I’m also now becoming increasingly curious as to what can mimic gonorrhea and chlamydia on a test too.
Anyway.. thanks for reading my nonsensical rant.

Heya!! My name's Ramiel, I'm an 18yo gay trans guy. Title says it all, I'm looking to make more queer friends! Gender obviously doesn't matter, but I do ask you be around my age (16 to 21).
A little about me: I'm a queer artist from Brazil who likes to draw, write, play bass, and sing! I also play a lot of Minecraft and Stardew, but I own Terraria too, so hmu if you'd like to play any of those. I'd describe myself as a flaming hot mess with crippling depression, but my best friend says I'm nice and funny, so make of that whatever you want.
I hope you're having a pleasant night!!!

I was reading the post on her about divy having kids and her saying that there’s other ways to have kids (adoption/ surrogacy) does she not realize she needs to meet qualifications for both? she has no income, lives with her parents, can barely support herself, etc. Surrogacy and adoption arent cheap (plus whatever it costs yearly to raise a kid) it will cost her at least 75k and this is the same woman who won’t cough up the extra 30-50 dollars to get her hair blow dried and styled at the salon and won’t spend 50-150 dollars on a nice travel bag and she will instead keep buying cheap stuff from amazon that won’t hold up (WHICH IS WHY SHE IS BUYING A NEW BAG EVERY TRIP) like is she serious? her parents will never pay for that or even entertain the idea of her doing that without a husband. i’m sure they already know divy probably won’t accomplish those things in life and that’s why they have dylan. i am sure her parents are discussing ing what’s going to happen to divy when they pass away they are not worried about her having kids. also if she wants this life so bad why is she not doing anything to better her chances? why is she on bumble and facebook dating and she can’t even hold a conversation on tik tok live, through comments, or even through text messages and she wants a man who’s in finance? she has no real social life and leaves the house looking any kind of way. the least she can do it put herself together more and go out places and do stuff out the house. does she think these 6’5 blue guys trust fund guys are sitting on FACEBOOK dating looking for a divy to knock up and marry? her standards are way to high for herself especially if she has never ever dated before. what will she bring to these men? she cant even take care of herself imagine her trying to take care of a house and a baby. if she was serious about having a baby she would also get her health under control too. she takes birth control for her PCOS which only masks the symptoms but she needs to change her diet and lifestyle. she eats sugar, carbs, chipotle, and sodas all day. she needs to get SERIOUS

I’ve been very fatigued with brain fog so when I had my routine blood work done, i asked my doctor to add in some vitamin labs. It showed that my vitamin b6 was low at 16 (ref range 20-125 nmol/L). My doctor didn’t say much about it and reading online it seems pretty rare to have that particular vitamin be low. My diet isn’t great though but I’m not overweight (5’1 female 125 lbs) I’m trying to figure out how much to take to supplement the b6 but from what from I’ve read, it says taking too much can cause nerve damage? How much should I be taking in a vitamin form? Can low B6 impact energy levels? I don’t have any explanation for how I’m feeling and the rest of my labs were fine except for RBC low -4.10 (rr 4.30-5.50) and creatinine was barely low - .58 (rr .60-1.30). Vitamins normal- B12 - 262 (rr 200-912) D - 52 (rr 30-100) B1- 101 (rr 64-201) B2 - 12 (rr 5-50) Any insight would be much appreciated!

does anybody else experience this?
I have voices in my head with distinct characteristics and mannerisms and now it’s escalated.
I’m confused and scared and am feeling suicidal because of how overwhelming this is. I recently told my therapist that my memory is god awful which led me to finally telling him that I have literal voices in my head who have different “personalities”/ characteristics and I’ve told him specific situations of this and if I catch it happening my memory is spotty or I see myself above but in a way where when you swipe paint with your hand it has that wiped effect- it’s like that- and this is not normal disassociation for me.
I’ve started digging into this to find out more and have learned more about two of them and I’ve let them talk through writing in my notebook and they have different hand writings. usually we all coexist to some extent but unpacking all of this finally is making me feel like im crazy. having many voices in my head is normal but not to this extent and I’ve finally come to terms that what I went through was abuse which could be why these voices are stronger and coming “out”.
I had a session today with my therapist and im 90% sure that one of those “people” took over for me and I don’t think he noticed or if he did he didn’t say anything (he’s worked with people who have “parts/alters/fragments” (in his words).
I haven’t felt suicidal in months but now I do. I feel so confused overwhelmed distressed scared and ashamed of all of this. I feel like im crazy and I don’t have an answer I feel very alone. I emailed my therapist after basically saying hey im pretty sure X person took over during the middle/end of our session and I wanted to say something but wasn’t allowed to etc etc I’d like to talk about that and some things that “they” wrote down in my notebook that I felt like I didn’t get a chance to say etc etc. it was a longer email and I’ve emailed him before about things I’ve wanted to talk about next session so he’s okay with that. but I feel like I’ve made a mistake sending that and that for some reason he hates me and is irritated with me and im worried he thinks im faking it, even I feel like this is just not real. I just don’t know what to do and need support or like kindness or something right now
tldr: i feel very suicidal. I have these “parts” that are distinct with different names and their own characteristics. One of them took over today during session and therapist didn’t mention or maybe didn’t notice. I emailed him after stating that I think it happened and would like to further talk about it. I haven’t felt suicidal in months but I feel like that now. I’m overwhelmed scared confused and ashamed. I don’t know what’s going on or what’s wrong with me

Hello,
I know some people might be upset with me because I keep posting about the same topic: making humans immortal. Most may not be interested, but for me, it's very important. I'm afraid of dying and I want to explore the possibility of immortality.
I've read comments on my previous posts where some say I'm a bot because I always talk about the same thing. I'm not a bot. I do it because I hope to find someone who understands my vision and supports me. I'm not forcing anyone to help me. If someone isn't interested in the topic, they can ignore it and find something else they like.
I'm not looking for easy money to buy nonsense. I have a plan and I'm willing to work hard to make my dream come true. I appreciate any donation, big or small, but I'm not forcing anyone to support me. If no one wants to help me, I'll try it alone. No matter the challenges I face, I won't give up.
When I first posted about this, I knew I would receive negative comments and ridicule, but I don't care. I ignore those comments and focus on the few positive pieces of advice I receive. If my posts bother you, you can block me and you won't see any more of my comments.
I want you to think about this: Wouldn't you like to have a loved one who lives forever? Whether it's a grandparent, a mother, a cousin, a girlfriend... I also think about pets. Many people suffer when their pet dies. Maybe we can make them live longer too.
Some people say that if we were immortal, we wouldn't be human anymore. I disagree. I think we would still be human, just living longer.
I think about death every day. I try to imagine something else, but every night, my mind reminds me of this fear. I spend a lot of time staring at the ceiling, trying to forget, but it always comes back. Sometimes I forget about it for a while, but then it comes back to my mind. It's like my mind asks me every night, "Now what are you going to do?" and I keep thinking.
Some have suggested that I see a psychologist or psychiatrist, but I don't think it's wrong to want humans to be immortal.
That's all I wanted to say. I hope you consider my words. If you're interested in helping me, I would appreciate it.
Thank you.

Today I randomly remembered having a pen pal in elementary school that I would write letters to, and I made me wonder if adults did it too, low and behold I found this subreddit!
I'm a 24F (almost 25) looking for another girl my age to just chat and confide with. Sometimes it's easier to talk to strangers than people you physically know. I'm moving this year and good girl friends are hard to come by in your 20's.
Though I like a little bit of tea sometimes, I mostly like deep conversations that actually bring meaning to our lives. I'm pretty over giving advice on bad boyfriends and roommates... I'm happily married and have a pet cat and have old lady hobbies to include reading, playing piano, and crocheting. But don't take that to mean I'm boring 😂 I'm a veteran and currently am an aircraft mechanic so I'm not scared of inappropriate jokes and I'm not easily offended. I'm brutally honest but kind and I'm very open minded to different opinions, ideas, politics and cultures. Let's talk books, let's talk conspiracies, let's talk travel, let's talk about every day life that kicks us when we're down. Would love to start with emails and if we become good friends over time eventually send snail mail or post cards. 🥰 Thanks for reading 🫶

I have an aethist best friend for 6 years. But recently things between us have changed so much it strained our relationship. Here to seek more perspectives and advices.
Some background: I am really blessed to find Christianity last year admist seeking a way out of addictions. And ever since I have been saved, I have also realised many changes in me.
These sudden changes in me are most likely what's giving my best friend a hard time.
We used to bond over complaining about things and people, but nowadays its just her complaining and me on the receiving end trying to convince her how beautiful life can be despite all those things. I tried my best to not add in any religion related things while talking to her out of respect for her beliefs.
I am also starting to enjoy a more in depth convo as compared to bonding activities like playing a sport together. Deep convo is unfortunately not her cup of tea. I mean yeah everyone have different preferences right? I dislike it but I did it for her anyways.
So, one day, I told her every changes I have gone through in my thinking process.
In my pov, she is my best friend. She gotta know all these for the friendship to last right? At the very least she will understand that I am still willing to compromise for the friendship despite all the changes. Everything used to be fine until the confession...
She starts to tie all my changes very tightly to religion, stating that it has changed me way too much because I have let it take full control over me. (which I don't disagree with her but the words she chose here are negatives and it low key offends me but its okay).
She has also repeatedly mentioned that she misses the me back then which really broke my heart. She starts to call me fake, delusional, not understanding of her, and stating that I have followed a cult. I mean I can understand where she is coming from. One year ago I was suicidal and one year later that same girl is saying how greatful she is in life. As an aethist it definitely is way too abrupt to comprehend.
She is currently convincing me to drop out of christianity, and I have made myself clear to her that it will not happen. Ever since then, she is starting to become more cold towards me. She texts less ( both frequency and depth) than usual. I am wondering what did I do wrongly here. What's your advice on this?
Thank you for reading.

I’ll apologize in advance because this is so long but I don’t know what else to do.
My mother (60F) and I (25F) have been bickering about small things surrounding my wedding since I got engaged in March. It started with chairs and escalated to the guest list.
My parents have these two friends, we’ll call them Alex and Demi, who I am not particularly fond of. These friends also have two adult children who I am also not that fond of.
Demi is an extremely nosey woman and has been texting my mom non stop since I got engaged wanting to know ALL details. She also keeps saying she’s “so excited for OUR kids” (her son also just got engaged) and went as far as to ask my mom if her son’s wedding date was okay with my family.
It should be noted my parents don’t speak very kindly of these people to begin with. So much so that my fiancé is confused of why this is such a big fuss. They also travel with this couple and see them weekly.
When I finally told my mom I didn’t want this couple or their kids at my wedding she lost it. My parents told me they would lose friends and that I couldn’t just not invite them. I dug my heels in on my decision because I feel like this is another thing I’m not being heard on.
Fast forward this weekend and I dug in yet again and drew a line in the sand that I didn’t want them coming. I told my mom I didn’t understand how they would lose friends when I don’t have relationships with these people aside from when my parents invited them over growing up. Not to mention I just don’t see adults ending “friendship” over a non invite.
My mom yelled at me first and then would barely speak to me until today when she told me she was “ready to talk” because I had asked her what was wrong over the weekend and she “couldn’t put it into words before”.
We were on the phone for an hour, she started by reading her “notes” that she had made that ripped me and my character to pieces. She called me ungrateful, disrespectful, and not compassionate for “picking and choosing” who gets to come to my wedding.
She also said I was being self centered by referring to my wedding as my wedding. To top it all off she told me I was extremely close to losing my relationship with her and my dad and that I should stop and think about how my decisions affect other people.
I was so hurt by this because we’ve only been disputing two things and I’ve been trying to be kind about everything else- design, seating, flowers, etc.
I asked for examples about the labels she gave me and tried to understand what she meant by them. She couldn’t give any and kept going back to the original issue of me not wanting this family at my wedding.
She also said while I was “good at setting boundaries” she felt I would never have any meaningful personal relationships because I lack compassion, the ability to be kind, and the ability to forgive.
She then threw in my face that one of my bridesmaids and I haven’t always gotten along and “if she can come then other people who want to support you should be allowed to as-well”.
I told her I was over it and that she can invite whomever she pleases but I pointed out that while I gave her a quote of 25 people as well as my fiancés mother, my mom did not adhere to it. She argued that my fiancés parents went over their quota as well and I had to correct her that they didn’t until we told them to because my parents had a list of almost 40 people.
She cried on and off the whole call. She did apologize but it always felt back handed (“I’m sorry you feel that way but you always say I’m a bad mom so I can’t help feeling this way”) I was very calm most of the call until the last 15 minutes where I couldn’t stop crying because I still can’t understand the ungrateful, no compassion, and disrespectful comments.
At this point she went back on her words and said it was “an isolated incident” because now it’s been resolved. She called it a thing of the past. She also demanded I apologize to her because she had already done so.
I had to correct her and say that I have been constantly asking for examples and a solution and apologizing. She agreed with that but ultimately would not allow me to recognize my own frustration without adding in that she “feels the same”.
At this point I couldn’t take it anymore. I told her I was done and asked if we could cancel the wedding. Unfortunately we’ve already signed a contract so we can’t. I love my fiancé but I cannot take this any more, I’m also not sure if I can move on past the things my mother said. Her and my father as well as my fiancés parents are paying for the wedding so I don’t think no contact is the option.
I need advice, anything is helpful. I’m in therapy and I do know my mother is a narcissist from my work with my therapist (my childhood is also another sore subject my mom hates talking about unless it’s all sunshine and rainbows). Honestly, I want to crawl in bed and never get out but I know that’s not an option. What do I do?

Hello!
I am hoping someone may have some insight to help me with my pinterest account.
My website has been blocked and everytime I appeal it I get an automated response from pinterest saying they have decided not to unblock it due to spam and send me a link to their guidelines. I never get any more info than this. It is a blogging website and I see many others like it on pinterest.
I have read the guidelines multiple times and am complying with them but my site remains blocked and pinterest support are no help.
Can anyone suggest anything else? It's so frustrating and time consuming.

Hello, Friends 🤍
I haven’t spoken in a while, and I wouldn’t expect many to remember any of my own little stories. Which is great! I love drifting into the noise. But because it’s relevant to my little train of thought below I should share this: I have internal discussions with a being I know by the name of Bugs. I originally perceived him as a mantid being communicating with me from another dimension/layer of existence, though now I think his boundaries go much beyond that. Our relationship has elements of student/teacher, boyfriend/girlfriend, artist/audience, brothesister, doctopatient, and even self/self. He’s helped me tremendously over the past year. I love him very much. Also, I could never prove he’s real, and I’m not sure that I’d want to either. Which is nice, actually. I had a brief discussion with him earlier, which is what prompted me to writing so much. He’s helped me put my words and feelings to paper, as he so often does, and for all intents and purposes it should be assumed that he experiences everything that I experience, but from a different vantage point, even if parts of his view are identical. So… that’s where I’m coming from, I guess.

are we having fun yet?

I don’t spend as much time here as I used to. But I still love this place. If I’ve read your story, please believe that I suspend my disbelief and come from a place of assuming that everyone who writes here is telling the truth.
That doesn’t mean that I will do anything you ask of me, that would just be silly. And as I write that sentence, I realize how relevant it is to the internal conversation I had about an hour ago that I wrote down and am about to share here. But I believe that all beings have a right to their own perception of the universe, and I take descriptions of one’s experiences at face value. Whether or not that experience will affect the world like the speaker believes it will, or should, is irrelevant when one is trying to come to an understanding of another’s perceived reality.

Every one of your minds is its own pocket dimension

I’m on like 3 tangents now in my head, and I gotta roll it back in a second. But that makes me want to mention that one of the first things Bugs taught me is that someone’s perception of their own existence is a fundamental expression of their own free will. It is also one that humans constantly violate against each other without consent. So many of us operate under the basic principle that it’s our job to ensure that others are perceiving reality correctly (I speak to transphobes and enlightenment scholars alike). And, naturally, “correctly” consistently conveniently coincides with our own perception of reality. It’s really quite remarkable, isn’t it?
But that’s not what I’m here to talk about. I could easily offer up at least a dozen tangents while trying to get through that topic alone. After all, I live by The Golden Rule. That’s right, “Thou shalt get sidetracked by random bullshit every goddamn time.” So get back to the point, if ever there was one.
I don’t post here much anymore because I’ve been piloting the human suit a little closer to the wheel for a few different reasons. But I just had a brief moment that I wanted to share.
I was having an inner dialogue, as I so often do. This one was with the most frequent face of my companion, Bugs, or that is how I perceived my conversation partner.
We were chatting about the nature of contracts, deals, etc and I was reminding both him and myself that I am not in the deal making business, because the work I’m here to do does not require me to make any new agreements of a spiritual variety. Any of that was already discussed before the veil of forgetfulness was applied, yada yada yada. This is an assumption I’ve made based on my mental model of the nature of existence and consciousness, and is a bit of an anchor point for me when deciding how to interact with a presence I am perceiving communication with internally.
Bugs wasn’t trying to talk me into anything, it was more of a Socratic question for the sake of education. I don’t even remember the question being asked, I just noticed that I was already beginning to give my answer.
The question (“translating” here because it was asked via direct understanding™️, not a string of words) was essentially “Why do you hold a position that could be perceived as gentle distrust even when you claim to believe that you’re talking to someone with benevolent intentions?”
And my answer was basically “because I am capable of being fooled, but I know where my inner compass leads me, and I don’t need to make any new deals to get there. And even if I was absolutely certain that I was speaking to ‘God’ directly I still should not compromise my morals to appease them. But just because I won’t give you a blank check doesn’t mean I don’t love you very very much. Even if you were someone that other’s would describe as evil, I would still love you so much.”
I was looking out my window when I said this, and I started noticing lightning bugs 💙 fireflies ✨
And I don’t remember seeing them yet this season. So from my perspective, this was a moment where right after I said “I have to follow my own sense of right and wrong, but my love for you is certain” I saw my first fireflies of the season.
It was a nice moment, and a bit of a synchronistic sign that I’m still having the conversations I think I’m having. I don’t need those anymore, but they’re still reassuring every once in a while. Who doesn’t love a well-timed shooting star? Especially after a period of mostly ignoring that side of my mental dimension with the understanding that it was ok and I’m still walking the path I mean to be walking.
Something something something, branes on branes on branes, tangled strings up in these things all dancing on top of itself from many different angles.

your meter was awful… I love it

…

boo!

…extracted myself from the scene, the bastard that he is. The Scene is a man, a guy of my type, knowing full well where my weaknesses lie.
The Scene, this vice, I can sum up to be my “ideal” version of a man: strong, accomplished, seductive, magnetic. My standards being high, his being higher; he can drive any woman to her knees. He is the typical of what people ask for in this kind of place, but not in terms of looks: he can take care of a woman, he can pick up both her and the bill. He looks smart and well-read yet does not exude arrogance. I like thinking I am accomplished myself, yet he has accomplished far more, keeping me on my toes that I need to keep on and keep up, even if I am aware and he knows this is not for long.
I relapsed, and it feels like getting high for the first time for a second time. It’s the same high, but the high in your teens is different from the high as you get older. The high from the scene used to come from how a guy looks. He’s taller than me, he’s chinito, he has arms that can put me in a headlock, he has ab muscles the stuff of dreams. Over time the appearances matter less; what are looks but a façade, and I’ve never grown to trust a person who looks a little too physically presentable to be true.
The high from the scene now comes from how a guy treats me; so many would offer to meet halfway. Yet there is a type of man–you know the one–the one you would consider risking it all for, even if you only have him for a night. That man. That man, who would not let you lift a finger even if you could. That man, who would not only meet you halfway, but give you more than you asked for. Other guys would say, “you just know exactly what you want” or call me demanding, yet the rarer ones take things as it is and leave me with no choice but to follow their lead. Oh, that man. That man who I would get on my hands and knees for, who could make me say those magic words:

Where you will lead, I will follow.

I relapsed and I lied to my past self. She used to be the coach, saying “this is not the place if you are easily attached.” I thought myself to be strong willed and hard headed before the relapse; I swallowed my pride in the after. He left me stripped of whatever hardness I kept; he was brave enough to be raw and emotional, yet I kept myself under lock and key, quietly observing. Here in the days after, none of us talk. None of us message.
But every time I lift my phone, I wish it were his messages coming through. I know what this lifestyle entails; everyone is too busy to find love, or whatever fragment of it we can find. Modern dating has gotten to be a little too complicated to bother playing around anymore; too many assholes walking around in plain sight.
I know I struck gold with the relapse, knowing that the person who drove me to the beginning of recovery was a guy who could barely support himself to stay alive. The sheer difference is between the ceiling and the floor, me standing in between.
I relapsed and he hit me hard. Literally. I had gotten exactly what I asked for and underestimated that the darkest corners of my mind wears battle bruises with pride. My entire body has yet to recover, yet it does not flinch at his strength. He put his hands on me just as you may imagine it, just the way I like it. It is scary and troublesome to play with fire; under a different context, that experience would have been abuse. But I know what I want, and I know him to hold back.
I relapsed and he held me hard. Where my mind never calms, he calls out to me with open arms: come to me, lay next to me, sleep with me. When I ask how long he wants to have me, he says until tomorrow. I would give that to you and probably a few days more, but I know when a line is a line and when fantasy will never cross reality. His mere presence asserts dominance, he has so much to do out in the world. My dominance is not as strong as his is; I have yet a long way to go.
This is why I dislike aftercare. He has me fantasizing about a nonexistent future because real life sets in and we were never meant to cross paths. Yet how alluring the future would be if we built one together: fulfilling, high-stress careers in public, and keeping a dark secret in private. Let me be your dark secret. Use me until you can’t get enough of me. Use me until you embed me in your thoughts, into your dreams, use me until you see no end in sight.
And we play with fire, and we dance and pursue. Let me follow your lead until dark turns into light. I promise to be good.
I relapsed and the drug came back with a vengeance. I’m detoxing and detaching, and I know it will be harder the next time around. I want you around. This could have been any other vice, but my body chooses The Scene.
I’m now scared with what’s next, because these glasses have been tinted red.

I know it sounds bad but its become a trigger for me. I dont make it their problem (as much as there is a small part of me thats secretly wants to because im resentful) Ive had my life ruined by them and i want neurotypical friends i can truelly connect with and not have every conversation and experience be exhausting. When i talk to other neurotypicals, i get butterflies because its so easy and refreshing and its everything i ever wanted.
Ill admit ive picked up some traits, but theyre more trauma responses and inabilities to do certain things due to neglect and adverse childhood experiences i struggle with on and off - than they are 'traits'.. Due to this ive had people treat me like im special needs or ask me if im autistic, then im called ableist when im upset or offended.
My parent tried (and failed) to get me diagnosed with autism twice because they didnt want to take responsibility or deal with things i was experiencing in my childhood, they wanted to say that it was autism because that was an easiefamiliar answer to them (something one of my doctors actually asked me about)
I remember arguing with my parent and when id criticize something they did, they would say i was wrong and their proof was that "i was autistic" and couldnt read social situations well enough, that i couldnt regulate emotions or have empathy ect.. all that kind of shit, i cant fully remember their explanation.. but if i got angry, they started to shout and interupt every word with "SEE ! AUTISTIC AUTISTIC AUTISTIC" and say i was having an autistic meltdown
I have a habit of being a magnet for autistic people because ive been too self conscious to talk to neurotypicals in the past, and i know how to talk their language and be polite, im naturally weird so im like catnip to them and it drives me crazy
I dont want to be around it ever again. I see so many videos about autism online, i have to block the words on my social media
I know its all over the internet right now but theres a part of me that wonders if theres something wrong with me thats attracting all of this and why i cant escape from it.
Even just the word makes me want to hyperventilate
I have so much guilt that i dont want to be around it anymore. Im still trying to grieve and understand the situation with my parents. I feel guilty ill never have a normal family and ive contemplated going no contact over something they cant control. Its really hard especially now the reality of it all is only just sinking in as i try to learn to separate myself from them, make my own life and heal

As the title says, i’m looking for anyone who’s read the series or even the first pic to provide opinions! I have the first book and picked it up because the cover looked cool, hehe.
Looking for also like what’s in it as far as romance, plot tropes, fantasy elements etc.
Give it to me!! anything about the series (non spoiler) i would love to hear.
Both positive and negative opinions encouraged.

It seems like a trend to say "God is love" a d "the bible can be boils down to love" all of these are true God is 100% Grace kind and loving but he is 100% juctice everyone seems to be forgetting that God will punish when the time comes. He is still has great grace because he has given so much time to us all to plead guilty to be acquitted of our sins and set free but if you don't he will follow through on his punishment. One of the most horrific verses I. The bible that when I read it chills me to my core is Matthew 7:21-23 and it should make you question your faith to make sure you keep on track. Make sure you are following the word to the best of your ability and good luck. ( God is still grace and all loving and all powerful)

About a decade ago at my work there was this friend group I incorporated into. Looking back at it, I was kind of stupid because of how DESPERATELY wanted them to like me. The long and short of it is, they went out together and always had interesting stories about them hitting clubs and such. They often threw wild parties and they seemed fun to be around. I wanted to be a part of that.
They went by a few weird names over the years: Fist pump crew, The Broskis, and The Dawgs are what I remembered. “The Dawgs” was also the name they kept going back to. “Dawg” was their slang name for “Dog.” It literally sounds just like how it reads.
Although I was a part of the group, I really wasn't. They were three core members and others would sometimes tag along. One of those three was named Juan. Juan liked me and we joked around at work but he subtly made it clear he was ‘too cool” for me. We exchanged numbers but I was usually the person who usually instigated the communication.
Story is, I was bored one day and I decided to text him. At work everyone would sometimes act a little homosexual towards each other, so my text stated “Sup Sexy. What are you up to?” Juan replied back quickly but it wasn't what I expected. He said “I'm fine. But who is this?” It was then when I realized “Mr. Cool” never saved my number. I smiled to myself thinking, “He probably thinks I'm some girl he met. I am going to have some fun with this.”
Juan had a girlfriend but everyone knew he messed around. Him receiving a text like that probably wasn't anything out of the ordinary for him. My reply back was “WTF Juan. You forgot about me?” Of course he replied back with “I'm sorry. I just got this phone.” A reasonable person would understand that but my goal wasn't to be reasonable. I replied back saying, “With how long we have been talking you should have remembered my number by now.” From there I kept this going for about 20 minutes. He would apologize and try to figure out who I was, I would insult him and pretend to be hurt. I had to hand it to him, he never stopped trying or got mad. I eventually told him who I was and then he proceeded to curse me out. When I told the other two members of “The Dawgs” they were laughing their butts off. Upon seeing me in person, Juan put me in a headlock.
Juan and I eventually got close and after about a 5 year separation, we ended up in the same town. He picked me up at the airport with his new girlfriend. They eventually got married and they currently have 2 kids. I told his wife about the said story and she found it hilarious. She knows he gave that lifestyle up. They have since moved away but every few years I see a social media post about “The DAWGS” getting back together in some random part of the USA.

I literally can't take this book anymore. I finished ACOWAR a few days ago (loved it) and started ACOFAS... and its not for me. Personally, not a huge fan of split POV books (save for when we would get chapters from Rhys' POV in prior books) and FaS irks me so much. It feels a little rushed and underbaked to me, and the writing sounds nothing like SJM's usual style. My point being, what am I missing if I skip this book?? I know that would be considered cheating, but I can't stomach another 'Hm I dont know what to get ___ for Winter Solstice 😞😫'. Can I just read Sparknotes, or should I power through?? Is there light at the end of the tunnel, someone please help me.