A few months ago I matched with a great guy on Hinge. While I wasn't immediately attracted to him, I was drawn to his kind face and way he seemed to be close with his family. We're both in our late 20's, connected on an emotional level and had many things in common. There was so much about his personality that was wonderful. In total, we went on 3 dates and had 3 phone calls over the space of 3 weeks. I always looked forward to spending time with him, however I unfortunately never felt that spark of physical attraction.
He wasn't an ogre or anything but after 3 dates, I was never eager or excited to do anything physical. Any hugging or physical contact was initiated by him and while it didn't make me uncomfortable, I felt nothing. On our last date, I felt that he had developed feelings for me and there was a moment where he wanted us to kiss but everything in me said no, I freaked out about it and deflected. I went home and after some thought, I decided it was best we end things as since I didn't feel any physical chemistry. As soon as I hung up after telling him on the phone, I knew I'd miss him but it wouldn't have been fair to carry on.
To give more background context about me, dating apps are things I never thought I'd have to use as I typically develop feelings for someone very slowly. I usually interact with them regularly in real life and it can take me several weeks if not a couple months to get to the point where I'd want to kiss them. I am also anxious-avoidant so that factors into how I develop feelings and relationships with people. I've been single for 5 years as the first 3 was just me taking a break from dating and the last 2 have been me struggling to find someone I connect with. Even friendship wise, it's been hard to make new friends as I moved to a new city so in truth I've been quite lonely.
It's been 3 months since I ended it. I'm putting more effort in increasing my social circle these days and have since been on other dates but it's never been the same. I find myself thinking about him sometimes and I miss talking to him. I don't know if it's because I'm lonely in general but his presence filled a void in my life. He was caring, considerate and seemed genuinely interested in things I liked. I felt like he saw me. Part of me feels like I should have just kept dating him to see if I ever did develop that 'spark'. I know dating experts say the spark is fake and I've been trying to date with that mindset but it's hard. I also never want to feel like I'm forcing myself into being attracted to someone just because they seem like a great person. I am also afraid that even if he said yes to seeing me again, he won't like me the same way or he'd eventually try to get back at me for hurting his feelings/ego somehow.
I know logically I should just leave him alone but maybe I'm overthinking it? Any advice?
TLDR: I rejected a great guy as I was not physically attracted to him after 3 dates. I miss him as we connected emotionally but I'm afraid to reach out and am considering just leaving him alone. Advice?

I've worked hard on my mentals in reaching a state of acceptance, still kinda wobbly but I'm at more of a stable place. I cry some days, I grieve as one should. But overall I've learned to sit with a lot of this better. I've clawed my way out of some pretty dark spots. But I feel guilty and helpless when I'm in a good mood or happy. I don't take any of that for granted either, I think gratitude is paramount. I realize I'm privileged in being able to feel this way. And that's part of my guilt, when bad things are going on in the world and I'm happy. I know as an individual you can't feel all the emotions in the world at once. And I let myself cry, I read about monkeys dying in the heatwave in Mexico. And I despair because I'm having a good day and that's an awful thing that's happening and there isn't a damn thing I can do about it either. I understand I have no control over it unfortunately. I know all I can do is love and nurture the nature and people around me as best as I can and love all the things that we still are lucky enough to have. It just feels like there's so much heavy shit to hold onto and one person can't do that all the time or all at once. I don't try to bury my head in the sand either, but I do take breaks and have been spending less time on the main sub. (I think Karen Perry makes some good points on dealing with this stuff).
This has made me spiral before into just a feeling of helplessness, and a lot of times I kinda cope by realizing there's a lot I literally can't do anything about, I don't use that as excuse to look away but I don't want to become paralyzed by it? But yeah I guess, should I feel guilty? How do you overcome that helpless feeling? I'm lucky that I have my family to love and I get to hear the birds in the morning and I have the space to plant a garden, I have a lovely hammock to lay in and read. And that makes me happy, but I'm not arrogant about the fact that I have these things. Idk, kind of a ramble that may have went off topic a smidge, sorry about that.... hope you guys are taking the best care of you and yours you can and maybe finding some happiness where you can in your life ❤

I'm going to try to keep this as short as possible.
Last year I met a guy online through a work type of situation. It was work only and when the project ended, we continued to talk just as friends.
He picked up another project and several months ago asked me if I wanted to come check it out. I did, and even though we didn't have the opportunity to spend much time together, at one point it seemed like we had some pretty hot eye contact and so I started re-evaluating the situation.
I have borderline personality disorder and don't always recognize when someone is flirting with me. I mentioned this to him and he said that he was the same way and thought he had autism.
My disorder is complex. I've been in and out of therapy for decades, literally. I'm very self aware and have been single for the past couple of years just trying to make sure that my MH is solid before I try to engage in any kind of relationship.
The issue that I'm having at the moment is trying to figure out if this guy actually likes me and is interested in having a relationship with me beyond friendship.
I'm fairly certain he finds me physically attractive as we've engaged in some light sexting, but I also told him that I was crushing on him and that I would like to hang out with him irl and he said that he tends to work.
Which, honestly felt like a friendzone statement.
He lives in the same town I do and he has a vehicle so I just figured he wasn't interested in me..as in ME...the way I look, yes, but not interested in an actual relationship with me.
Our conversation since though has ranged from our shared interests back around to some light, joking sexting. He told me once that when he is interested in someone he tends to be goofy, and this particular conversation was kind of goofy.
I told him that I hadn't gotten a D* pic in a while and he said that he would send me one and I told him that I really needed a hug.
He said that I gave great hugs. And that was it.
The next morning he sent me a picture of himself, no D*, and...I'm so confused.
I already feel so not sexy for telling him that I am crushing on him, and i already feel like I got shot down. There have been times when he's talked to me about his family or childhood things but not often.
I enjoy his friendship and don't want to do anything to jeopardize that. I also would like to be more than friends but I can't tell if it's ever going to happen.
Any thoughts? Thanks :)

ok so, this was basically when I was 12-13 . I was addicted to catfishing people on Instagram, and it became a regular habit. I met this dude who was 34-36 with 2 kids and he thought I was some random 15 (or 16) yr old girl from Europe. and we talked before I think he sent me a d pic and I was like "WOAH", then he asked me for a picture and I was like "sure" I scrolled through Twitter, found a nude photo and sent it to him saying it was me. I don't know how I ended our conversation, but I ended up blocking him and it's been over a year since I've talked to him. Now today I feel a horrible weight of guilt and I feel horrible about catfishing . I feel horrible about doing that to the guy and the thought that I might of have ruined his relationship and family is gut wrenching to me. I don't even remember his username since I logged out of my old account and I don't remember my old username or password. What do I do? I've stopped catfishing ever since an issue happened and I feel better about not catfishing but this feeling about the guy won't go away..

Arriving in Bologna on a Sunday late afternoon with family and will have 4 big bags. Is is advisable to take the public transportation to arrive to our airbnb or taxi is a better option? How to get tickets for train/tram / metro or book taxi in advance?. I read somewhere there is no Uber there. Thanks in advance.

I’m a student I’m a 19F year old student in college dating a guy I been with for going on 3 years now I have a overall good relationship with my parents though we often butt heads a lot…throughout my whole life I had a “problem with boys” it started when I was 14F I started dating of course being young and dumb i did dumb things like texting inappropriately. My parents would go through my phone and find thing an make me break up with them even if we wasn’t texting inappropriate as well…When I was 15F I met a guy who was Muslim who I started dating when I was 16F and he ended up sharing at part of his religion with me I got very close with his family but my parents are Christian so when they saw I was changing my views on my own religion and actually starting to love Islam and wanted to convert they forced me to break up with him i didn’t want to because he was also my friend so I left home and this caused a big deal… my grandma called the police on me and I got brought home being forced to now see or talk to him, quite my job( I worked with him), and not graduate early ( I was ahead and had great grades in High school). A year later I met my current Boyfriend who I truly love and I know loves me. Me and my boyfriend, me 16M and 17F I am a year older. I try to hide him from my parents because I know they would probably tell me to break up with him or start going through my phone again. Which they did go through my phone and saw I was dating him and wanted me to break up with him but I didn’t! We continue dating and we wasn’t perfect we were young a dumb as well when we first started dating we wasn’t allowed to go on dates because we both didn’t have a car so I try to sneak to his house and got caught then a year ago I sneaked him into my house for a day while my parents where gone on vacation he felt uneasy because he knew my parents are strict and didn’t want to get me in trouble but we did anyway and we were successful… Until 6 months later me and my dad had been arguing because of how I felt he treats me (we have a rocky relationship and when me mad he will ignore me for weeks) this turned into a family problem because my grandma and mom got into it and he felt I was putting all the blame on him. So one day I came home after going to meet my boyfriend ate the park ( they knew I was meeting him) I came home and we got into a big argument. My dad said he doesn’t talk to me because how I act and told me how he had on camera me sneaking my boyfriend in the house. I felt really bad and knew I was wrong but confused why he just now decided to confront me about it. But why forced me to break up with my boyfriend i didn’t want to because I love him we been dating now for 2 years as well and I’m 18 but to go into college so I packed my stuff and tried to leave, my boyfriend wanted me to come stay with him till I could move into my dorm but my dad got mad and got physically aggressive and stoped me( gave me bruises on my arm). I brought all my college supplies myself man’s my mom broke it in the front yard with a hammer… I even gave them my car keys and was but to leave to my boyfriend house in the Uber I bought. But they forced me to stay and break up with him also I wasn’t allowed to go live on campus anymore. Now a year later my parents hate him and since I live in there house I’m not allowed to see him( we met one a week at my college to see each other secretly). They said I did this to myself and I always blame them…I’m really in a hard spot right now and don’t know what to do.

For starters my wife and I have been together for nearly 15 years. I'm 32, wife 31. The sister in question is mid 20s(We will call her Honda for the sake of the story) To sum everything up, The sister has been on and off drugs consistently, is a functioning alcoholic (like legitimate alcoholic, She never eats and only drinks if she chooses between the two) and is the "wild child" of her siblings. She has a permanent STD (Herp) and doesn't really care and is the heavy attention seeker and professional "Victim" of the family.(Like she would legit hide her disease and not tell a partner) She is an absolute chronic pathological liar, she has made up countless stories about her life and even about her own family and friends to seem "cool" or Better than others or just to benefit herself in some way. With that said; AITA if I want to snitch that she is having an affair with her boss who is married? So her boss is a doctor and Honda is his medical assistant. The HUGE problem is the following: 1. She has a STD and what if he doesn't know and what if his wife gets it!?!?!? 2. Her OTHER sister is also an employee there (we will call her Chevy). Chevy has stated that the affair is so blatant at work that patients of his have called his office to complain about inappropriate touching between him and Honda. (Neck massages and similar touching while he is seeing a patient). Chevy has severe anxiety about it and doesn't want to ruin Honda's life over it. (Honda is known to spiral and reach back for substances when her life is going downward). Chevy and the rest of the small practice ALL know they are together and are getting EXTREMELY upset at the unfair treatment. This isn't just her getting better raises or opportunity at work; he actively pays part of her rent, takes her on expensive dates, stays at hotels, paid for her car payment when "she can't afford it" and let's her take extra time off because "she smells like alcohol". Chevy has such bad anxiety that she breaks out in hives and such. So I don't want to add any extra stress to her either.. Honda also posts him all over Snapchat and her stories about him buying her stuff and leaving her apartment ect...
TLDR: We found his wife on social media.. We haven't said anything but my heart hurts for his wife and young children.. My heart also hurts because I know this could be Honda's last straw and excuse to spiral.. My thoughts are that Honda AND Chevy could lose their jobs (although the doctor is clearly a douche and could possibly be sued for that) or I could really hurt the relationship between my wife and Honda and maybe even worse it could affect the dynamic with Chevy being able to confode in my wife again... Idk but would that make me an asshole if I just made a fake social media account and told the guys wife? I'm so torn...

What's going on $FFIE family. I just wanted to post this video here and hope you all can check it out because the gentleman in it brings up some really interesting points that I wanted to outline.
Before we begin just a quick disclaimer:
**Disclaimer: I am in no way a financial advisor, nor am I giving you financial advice by writing this post. This post is just a reiteration of the YouTube video I'm posting here and am essentially just reiterating what this gentleman is suggesting in this video. So at your own discretion, please use this information for educational purposes ONLY and not to guide you in your financial decisions. As always, investing involves lots of risk. Any decisions you do make regarding investing is done at your own will and accord. I'm am making this post just to open up communication and discuss what you all think about this video and the information presented.
**Disclaimer 2: I am some random guy over the internet and the individual in the video is too. This is just one individual's thoughts on the matter and he or I could be totally wrong.
(please watch the original video from yesterday then watch the video attached to this post) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQbCyv9wIAk
(please watch the video from today that I reference in this post) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHEU939Ncp8
Essentially, he discussed in a previous video that possibly millions of shares that don't exist are floating around out there, there was 95% short interest on $FFIE currently; however, these CAT numbers are likely not true and its possible that the short interest is actually a lot higher - while the short sellers are saying that they can sell off all of these shares in anywhere from 30-60 minutes. If you are paying attention to the price, we all know that these clowns cannot do this because they would:
a) have to take a massive loss if they did this.
b) this great community is gaining momentum over them and are owning more and more shares, which is causing us to control the supply of the shares available on the market
Part b) is very important because what the man in the video is explaining is that, the amount of shares that are being reported available are much more than what is actually in circulation. Why does this matter? Its possible that these guys are doing something called 'naked short selling'. This is an illegal practice which involves market manipulation. How does it work? Let's take the scenario we are in.
So to briefly summarize what the normal short sellers hope for is:
1) borrow $FFIE shares from their brokerage at a high price, with expectations price will fall
2) They sell off the shares for the high price
3) They buy the number of shares they need at the price the shares dropped to, return the borrowed shares back to the broker and profit the difference.
Where we get the drop on the short sellers:
1) short sellers borrow $FFIE shares from brokerage at a high price, with expectations price will fall
2) We buy lots and lots of shares and control the supply amount of shares that are available on market by holding them
3) short sellers need the price to come down, otherwise they sell at the higher price and lose money, but get the borrowed shares back to return to their broker to make them whole
What the man in the video is explaining may be happening:
1) short sellers originally and illegally said they had 'borrowed' shares from a broker and are looking to sell them (prior to our large movement or during and up until the present moment)
2) they then 'sell' the shares (that again they don't have) to a potential buyer. That buyer pays these naked short sellers money but they never receive the 'borrowed' shares they were promised.
Just a note before I go on:
I see a lot of people giving each other shit for panic selling. I'm not saying that this wasn't happening or called for, but some of these drops could have been from these naked short sellers who were manipulating the stock price downward illegally? How?
3) the hope of the naked short seller is that in general, they will do this to drive the price down forcibly, buy the stock back at the lower price and then provide the original buyer with the stock to make everyone whole. In turn, they pocket the difference. As you can tell, there is fraudulent behavior in this method and its also manipulating the stock negatively (which is of course an SEC no no).
Here is why: If these sellers come around and tell people they have stock that they don't actually have, this creates more supply of stock (although this isn't the case and this 'stock' that they 'own' doesn't exist. If we look at simple supply and demand, this means there is more supply of the stock, so this causes the price of the stock to drop, as a result).
So in our situation that we are in right now, is unique and as the days go on, we're exposing these naked short sellers. The reason for this is because we are getting to a point where volume is stabilizing and we are owning more and more stock as a community. So then you have to ask yourself, if this is the case, where are they even getting stock to sell and still bringing the price down at these levels? The answer is that they likely are naked short selling and bringing the stock price down illegally and manipulating the price.
Now before you all freak out (too late I'm sure) - this information may actually be a really great thing for us and these people who are working against our efforts. As Sun Tzu said in the Art of War, 'If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.'
Why is this difficult for us:
Obviously, whether we hold or not, these individuals can drive the price down (so long as they can keep this charade up - BUT and its a big BUT - there is a time limit and problem with this (this is the good news, I promise)).
Why is this beneficial for us:

• It exposes the potential strategy of those on the other side of our trade - so we can create a counter strategy against this.
  
• According to FINRA's rules, there is something called a threshold list. If a company gets on this list (which $FFIE has made it on the list), it means that there are individuals that are shorting the stock, but not paying the shorts back over consecutive days. We know this is happening in general, but as the guy in the video discusses, the amount of shares that are being shorted (he says potentially hundreds of millions) and the short interest %, do not make sense, nor does it make anymore sense of how long they are saying it would take to pay the shorts off (30-60 minutes). So its likely that these individuals cannot cover these shorts at all, and there potentially could be reason to believe that they are way in over their head and likely are manipulating the stock to bring it down with their desperate attempts we've seen so far.
  
• Based on my second point, this is really important because opened shorts on the threshold list have a time limit to be FTD (Failure to Deliver). As of today, we are on day 5 of being on the threshold list with FTD (according to the man in the video). FINRA rules require that if the shorts on the company remain on the threshold list for 13 consecutive days, the short seller must immediately close out their positions by purchasing the shares and in the case of naked short sellers, they may be subject to margin calls with the broker if they can't buy the shares outright (in our situation, this would be the case because they are hesitant to buy, since we are keeping the price too high for them - in turn, this would cause the short seller's account to fall below a maintenance margin and the margin call would be initiated (again sometime after 13 consecutive trading days of them not buying the shares). Also, even in some rare occurrences, the brokerage can take a loan against them and will get the money from them by possibly taking other assets through legal action. The man in the video mentions that a lot of times, these individuals wind up also getting fined and write this off on their taxes.
  
• This is huge because this gives us somewhat of a timeline of about how long they potentially have to buy back their shares before they truly start running into problems. It doesn't mean on that day that this is it and we get our short squeeze, but I would think that this could possibly shorten our timeline down and gives us a better idea of how long they have to make a move and kind of how things may progress from there. It could take longer than this, its not set in stone.
  

**Remember: Those who are doing naked shorts are doing so illegally. They literally are telling people to give them money for shares that they don't have, with the hope that they will buy lower priced shares after they've driven the price of the shares down from a top, by introducing shares that don't even really exist into the market. They are in trouble if they cannot hand over the shares to the seller who gave them the money. That won't really last long. The pressure is definitely on because they are committing fraud. So there is that for them to deal with too.
So to summarize:
Naked short sellers are potentially working against us by illegally driving the price down through selling shares that they don't have. Given that the amount of shares being short sold (in the hundreds of millions) probably cannot be delivered in general because they aren't real, the stock having very high short interest % (probably much more than what is actually being reported) and the CAT numbers are telling us that these individuals can buy the shares they borrowed back in anywhere from 30-60 minutes (despite us all owning, holding and in some ways controlling more and more of the supply of the stock), this is hard to believe that any of this is true. Since we now have this information, we can anticipate what these mfers are going to do, which is illegally drive the price down so that they can try and delist the stock from the Nasdaq and buy back the stock for cheap, and eventually get their way.
What can we do?
1) Keep the price above a dollar to avoid Nasdaq delisting.
2) Keep buying and holding shares to wait these fuckers out until sometime around June 4th or 5th because at that point, they will start feeling the pressure and according to FINRA, this would be 13 consecutive days of them not paying their shares back, which can result in potential margin calls and their brokerage may liquidate their assets to buy the shares back at the higher price or slap them with a loan against the naked short sellers, if it ever gets to that point (at a later date) - remember though, this may drag on past this point, its not a guarantee but something I'd like to ponder with you all more about.
3) Pay attention to any other news regarding the company and keep up to date with the fundamentals as well
I may have completely misinterpreted this video because the gentleman takes us in a legal direction and looking at the matter in that way. However, I feel that this information could still be favorable for us all, but you all tell me what you think.
Let's discuss further!
P.S. I'd like to give a shoutout to ProfessionalAd's post (find it here: https://www.reddit.com/FFIE/comments/1cxcy4g/i\_swearif\_everyone\_would\_just\_read\_and\_comprehend/), where he discusses how to shut off lending of $FFIE and to set buy limits on orders to prevent short sellers from under bidding us. Please check it out whenever you have a minute.

Just looking for feedback on what a fair "friends and family discount" would be in this scenario...
I (26F) work a well-payed job and own a decently nice 3 bedroom home. I live by myself and cover all my own expenses comfortably.
My brother (22M) just graduated college and is trying to find a rental in my area as he starts his first "grown-up" job as a school teacher. (So, not the best salary. Especially when you first start out.)
I have the opportunity to offer him one of my spare bedrooms as a rental, but I have very little context for how much would be a fair price. When I was in college, I paid $750 for a similar room and shared bath in a different area. Rental rooms in our current city go for anywhere from $550 to $1400+ (FOR A ROOM 💀).
My gut instinct is to say 50% "discount" on the $750 and charge him $375 monthly as a fair balance between helping out a family member while also helping me cover any added costs for utilities/lost benefits from living alone.
What would you guys do in this situation? Does this seem like a fair rental cost?
TLDR: How much would you charge your freshly graduated sibling for a room rental?

Just wanted to pop into here and say hi since this is a topic I try to talk about somewhat frequently and am always encouraging other people to donate.
I've donated as regularly as I can for the past several years. I'm at 2.5 gallons, so in NY I get a new card at 5 gallons (so about 2.5 years away). I believe I have donated a total of 17 or 19 pints (one time I didn't have enough iron to give double reds but they badly needed blood and took a single O NEG). So been going for a few years REGULARLY now. I always w ent when I could since I turned 18 but I had a few personally bad years where I wasn't going. Hoping to make that up as much as I can going forward. You guys are probably the only people that understand HOW BADLY I want to upgrade from my 1 gallon card to my 5 gallon card. I'm already planning it 2-3 years out...not weird!
I'm O- so I feel morally obligated to an extent. Additionally I have had a family member receive an organ transplant, and feel again obligated to give back in the way I can.
I do double reds as frequently as I can. The drawback is the past several years I have had to travel overseas to be with my fiance. The area she lives it excludes me from donating blood for a certain period after my return. Therefore, this year for example I am making my schedule tight: donating TWICE this calendar year before going (literally donating not even days before my flight) and since it's double reds, it's 4 units.
I try and spread the message to as many people as possible. Even if I get just one of them to donate once I feel it's worth it. As I'm sure everyone on this forum is aware, the blood supply is always low and stock is hard to keep. I fortunately live in an area of the country where we have still have enough donors despite how few people donate (NYC) and the hospitals regularly have more than enough blood. However, the reason I try to push people so much is, as I know you all know: the blood supply issue in the USA is one of "longevity," or a better word would be consistency: we need more people donating YEAR ROUND to prevent any shortages. What instead ends up happening (again, as I'm sure you all are aware) is that tons of people donate in the wake of some sort of emergency or disaster, but because SO MUCH is donated during those times a lot of it ends up wasted.
Anyway, sorry for the spiel. I figured if there was any place to give that little rant it's here. Once again: O NEG donor here (I think I'm CMV negative too, unsure) who donates DRBC as much as possible because I feel morally obligated from both a societal standpoint as well as somewhat of a personal one.
HOPE OTHER O- DONATE IN CASE I EVER NEED IT!
To everyone on here: THANK YOU ALL FOR DONATING. Everyone here is hero in a small way for committing to doing this multiple times. Even if you only go once a year to a blood drive, that is more than the average person in the USA. I hope more people sign up to donate CONSISTENTLY, and I also hope more people sign up to be organ donors (again a close loved one got a major organ, more than a kidney). I wish we had an opt-out system like Australia in that regard, but that's a topic distinct from blood donation.
THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO DONATES! I'm hoping I can get ONE MORE IN before the year ends, if I have enough time pass after returning the last week of August. Unlikely, but I'll keep my plan to give two DRBC a year before my trips (we all know the max is 3 but if I can only do 2 I'll do 2).
THANKS TO ANYONE WHO READ THIS! THANKS TO ALL FELLOW DONORS! I HOPE YOUR JOB AT LEAST GIVES YOU SOME TIME OFF FROM WORK TO DO IT! I get 2 hours a year to donate blood (can't be split into two one hour chunks as much as I'd like, as I could then leave work 1 hour early twice without it counting against me to donate), and I HOPE TO GOD your job offers something similar. If you're unsure, I highly suggest you ask, as it's becoming more common than before.
ALL BLOOD DONORS HERE: YOU ARE HEROES! Be well everyone.

I’m a student I’m a 19 year old student in college dating a guy I been with for going on 3 years now I have a overall good relationship with my parents though we often butt heads a lot…throughout my whole life I had a “problem with boys” it started when I was 14 I started dating of course being young and dumb i did dumb things like texting inappropriately. My parents would go through my phone and find thing an make me break up with them even if we wasn’t texting inappropriate as well…When I was 15 I met a guy who was Muslim who I started dating when I was 16 and he ended up sharing at part of his religion with me I got very close with his family but my parents are Christian so when they saw I was changing my views on my own religion and actually starting to love Islam and wanted to convert they forced me to break up with him i didn’t want to because he was also my friend so I left home and this caused a big deal… my grandma called the police on me and I got brought home being forced to now see or talk to him, quite my job( I worked with him), and not graduate early ( I was ahead and had great grades in High school). A year later I met my current Boyfriend who I truly love and I know loves me. Me and my boyfriend me 16 and 17 I am a year older. I try to hide him from my parents because I know they would probably tell me to break up with him or start going through my phone again. Which they did go through my phone and saw I was dating him and wanted me to break up with him but I didn’t! We continue dating and we wasn’t perfect we were young a dumb as well when we first started dating we wasn’t allowed to go on dates because we both didn’t have a car so I try to sneak to his house and got caught then a year ago I sneaked him into my house for a day while my parents where gone on vacation he felt uneasy because he knew my parents are strict and didn’t want to get me in trouble but we did anyway and we were successful… Until 6 months later me and my dad had been arguing because of how I felt he treats me (we have a rocky relationship and when me mad he will ignore me for weeks) this turned into a family problem because my grandma and mom got into it and he felt I was putting all the blame on him. So one day I came home after going to meet my boyfriend ate the park ( they knew I was meeting him) I came home and we got into a big argument. My dad said he doesn’t talk to me because how I act and told me how he had on camera me sneaking my boyfriend in the house. I felt really bad and knew I was wrong but confused why he just now decided to confront me about it. But why forced me to break up with my boyfriend i didn’t want to because I love him we been dating now for 2 years as well and I’m 18 but to go into college so I packed my stuff and tried to leave, my boyfriend wanted me to come stay with him till I could move into my dorm but my dad got mad and got physically aggressive and stoped me( gave me bruises on my arm). I brought all my college supplies myself man’s my mom broke it in the front yard with a hammer… I even gave them my car keys and was but to leave to my boyfriend house in the Uber I bought. But they forced me to stay and break up with him also I wasn’t allowed to go live on campus anymore. Now a year later my parents hate him and since I live in there house I’m not allowed to see him( we met one a week at my college to see each other secretly). They said I did this to myself and I always blame them…I’m I the problem?

Right now not in a good place in life. Live with family but deserve love too. There’s homeless people, mentally unstable people, and incompatible people dating. Don’t look conventionally attractive. And always get put in the friend zone by men and women. Refuse to use dating apps cause you have to be pretty. Just got rejected by a guy and feel terrified to ever approach again. Always know the rejection is coming.
Nothing good comes from approaching and men don’t pursue me. Women aren’t any different. Even the people who never leave the house have partners.
Tried taking a break. Tried not talking a break. And I am with myself all the time so self love isn’t the answer. What else is there?

Hey guys, I’m gonna be applying this upcoming cycle, and was hoping to get some feedback on my school list. I listed everything below, please be brutally honest! I wanna make sure I’m not too top heavy.
Stats/background

1. GPA- 3.94
2. MCAT- 513 (130/126/128/129)
3. Ethnicity- African American (Mauritian)
4. Undergrad- State university in CA

ECs
Clinical

1. ED Scribe- 550 hours
2. Hospice Volunteer- 170 hours
3. Medical Mobile Clinic Volunteer- 100 hours

Non-Clinical

1. Soup Kitchen for Homeless/Underserved- 175 hours

Shadowing

1. Orthopedic surgery and Podiatry- 81 hours

Leadership

1. President and Founder of Mental Health Club- 470 hours
2. CEO and Co-founder of medical education non-profit for refugees- 640 hours. Have an official partnership with a local medical school. Helped over 400 families. Active in multiple cities.
3. President of International Student Club- 550 hours

Tutoring/TAing

1. Lead Physics Facilitator of School Tutoring Program. Lead group of 2 other facilitators. - 528 hours

Research

1. Educational research for past 2 years with focus on URM students. 1 pub under review. 6 posters.- 640 hours

Extracurricular

1. Started and write a mental health/psychology blog. Roughly 100,000 monthly visitors.- 400 hours

Hobbies

1. Amateur Muay Thai Fighter- 350 hours

Honors/Awards/Recognitions

1. 7 scholarships
2. 3 research awards
3. Dean’s Honors List every semester

School List (as based on admit.org)
Reach

1. Stanford
2. UCSF
3. Harvard
4. John Hopkins
5. Perelman
6. Columbia
7. Duke
8. Vandy
9. WashU
10. Cornell
11. NYU Grossman

Target

1. UCLA
2. UCSD
3. Northwestern
4. Pitt
5. Icahn
6. Case Western
7. U of Virginia
8. U of Rochester
9. USF
10. Hofstra
11. Chicago Pritzker
12. Emory

Baseline

1. Keck
2. UC Irvine
3. UC Davis
4. Colorado
5. Albert Einstein
6. U of Iowa
7. Kaiser Permanente Tyson

hi guys! just got off WL into WesternU COMP and have an A at Touro California. super blessed and excited.
In terms of what I'm interested in: rads, path, EM, and derm (I know)...
My heart is telling me WesternU Comp. But pls advise me here are some comprehensive pros and cons
WesternU COMP
PROS:
-closer to family (vv important to me)
-more prestigious?
-more access to research
-below copied from other posts

• Rotations are more centralized, so it'll be more convenient and you won't have to move around during 3rd and 4th year.
• Several of Western's rotations sites have residencies attached to them.
• Neither Pomona or Mare Island are booming metropolises, but I'd argue Pomona is a bit nicer.
• -matches to things I'm more interested in
• CONS:
• Ive heard western is WAY more OMM heavy

TOURO
PROS:
-true P/F
-cheap rent
-has gotten better at supporting its students
-HAD a really good match year this year
CONS:
-almost half match into prim care (IM SUPER not into this)

• campus is scary

-far away from family
-scehduling rotations during 3 and 4th year has students pulling out hair, and roations at western are more social (less moving).
I guess what it comes down to is the grading. Its like am I willing to sacrifice my sanity for HP/P/F etc.
If you have any advice pls lmk. Just worried about making a wrong choice.

It was, and still is, my favorite LPS video. Unfortunately, the original is gone but there are some react videos uploaded. When I first saw it I thought it was the funniest thing ever. So funny that my sister and I brought my mom to the family computer to show her. She didn’t like the censored swears. Crazy how long ago that was. Anyway, have you guys seen it? I’m Cupcake’s biggest fan. The video still makes me laugh a bit.

21st: Scot Pollard (Kaoh Rong - 8th)

NBA REP IN ENDGAME LMFAOOOO
u/SMC0629:
It’s insane how great of a villain Scot is especially as deep into the show Kaoh Rong is, but he really is. Scot is one of the most petty and selfish people to be on the show, and it’s glorious. At the same time, you find yourself rooting for him every once in a while, there’s a lot of depth that goes into his character. I think he’s so deserving of endgame, and I couldn’t be happier he made it.
~
u/DryBonesKing:
The way my mouth dropped when Zan approached me for an Endgame deal that included Scot Pollard of all people. Like, based doesn’t even do the feeling justice when I described how hyped I felt about it. I love Scot and I think he has such a unique presence that I’m not sure if Survivor will ever truly replicate, especially as the show tries to carry itself as a more family friendly experience. But Scot is just so naturally intimidating and terrifying, and the scene of him dousing the fire in the middle of the day just to fuck with the tribe around him, might be one of the coldest scenes I have ever seen on Survivor.
The combined impact both he and Kyle Jason (who I actually have ranked back-to-back with him in my personal rankings) is just truly something as they feel more like one of the most intimidating villain presences in the show’s history. And what really helps make them better is how they sorta piggy-back on each other. Scot adds more of a natural darkness to Jason that helps him feel even more “evil” than he probably is, while Jason has a way with words and “just enough” of a sympathetic angle in his edit that you can’t help but worry that he could be getting a winner’s edit, that the two actually feel like they could succeed. You don’t get that shit really ever in Survivor! You watch Pearl Islands and you know Fairplay’s gonna lose in the end. Philippines? Abi won’t win with her edit. Worlds Apart’s evil trio? Well thankfully not cause all three of them suck ass, but the edit definitely is giving it away they’re going to lose to Mike in the end. But Scot and Jason? I mean… shit… why are they editing Jason like this? Is… Are they going to win out?
And because of that, it makes their downfall feel even more impactful. It makes Tai saying “No” at Scot’s boot one of the best moments of all time.
Scot’s fantastic. Amazing presence. Amazing character dynamic. One of the best relationships of all time with Jason. A great role in Tai’s character arc and brief descent to darkness. So many amazing qualities I can just gush about. I wouldn’t have in my own Endgame, but I am thrilled that someone wanted this to happen and I can’t wait to read the write-up justifying it!
Overall Rank – 52/821
~
u/Tommyroxs45:
Scot is such an awesome villain, yeah he’s a scumbag but who cares! We need someone who actively just doesn’t like anybody around him and he works so well with people like Tai and Aubry. You also can’t forget his bromance with Jason, just perfect, 2 villains who deserve to return!
~
u/Regnisyak1:
Scot is a partial reason why Kaoh Rong doesn’t land for me. I think his villainy gets to be a little too OTT to his character, and his ruthless nature toward Alecia just never sat right with me. Objectively, he is a great character, but I just personally think he is a lot and someone I would never have in Endgame without a deal, lol. But happy for Zan!
Personal Rank: 124/821. 8/10.
~
u/ninjedi1:
Scot is definitely one of the most unique villains on Survivor. You have the standard dickish villain role on the Brawn tribe, but then you do get to see his sweeter side with his bond with Tai when he gets swapped to another tribe. Then of course you have just absolute perfection at the merge with all the messy gameplay as well as beijng in one of my favorite alliances on the show with Tai and Jason, and then his blindside creating just the perfect Scot Sandwich, making it an absolute treat.
~~~~~
u/Zanthosus:
What makes a good Survivor villain? The answer to that question is going to be different for everybody. Some people may think that a great villain needs to be exceptionally charismatic, toe the line between cruelty and comedy, or have sympathetic motives or backstory to justify their means of reaching the end. All of these are valid things to look for, and they are all hallmarks of some of the best villains in the show’s history. But Scot falls into a different kind of category from most of these kinds of villains. He’s from an extinct subcategory of villains: the bully. It’s been said before that Scot is the last true villain of Survivor. And while I don’t agree with that statement completely, I do believe that he is the last bully we have seen, and will likely ever see again with how the show has edited and portrayed its characters. We’ll still have antagonists to root against, sure. Jonathan Young and Drew Basile are some recent examples that show Survivor can still give us some pretty good antagonistic forces. But when it comes to the cruel bully archetype, Scot is the last of that kind of character.
And it’s honestly bizarre to me in many ways how I find Scot an incredibly fascinating character, and end up loving to hate him. Especially when you compare him to so many of the other characters of this archetype we’ve seen over the years. Rocky Reid, NaOnka Mixon, and Corinne Kaplan are some of the more notable names that belong to this group. While these characters do undoubtedly have their own defenders, I’d be willing to bet that they’re much more disliked than liked across this community. And of course Scot has his own detractors, but it’s always seemed to me that there’s been much less of an outspoken force against him than others like him. And I’m no different. I have Scot in my own personal endgame, while many other bullies are sitting in my bottom 100 of all time. So, what gives? Well, while I can’t speak for everyone, for me at least it really comes down to one thing. It’s how the people that he and Jason pick on through the season consistently stand up to them and refuse to just lay down and take it. Even if it’s not immediately, almost everyone they target stands up for themselves in one way or another. It also helps that none of their bullying is steeped in any kind of bigotry or hatefulness. They value strength and are doing whatever they can do in their power to make it just a bit further into the game.
Even from the very start of the game, they immediately single out Darnell and Alecia as being the weak links on their tribe. I mentioned before in the Alecia writeup that To Tang is one of my favorite tribes of all time. Literally everyone has something to offer entertainment wise. And while Darnell is swiftly eliminated as the first boot, Alecia manages to cockroach her way a bit further. Scot is not shy about making his feelings for her known, being that she has no place on the Brawn tribe and that she’s holding them back in challenges and ruining tribe morale. And this rivalry is just so much fun to watch. Alecia’s constant scrappiness continually digging her hole deeper and deeper as one by one everyone on To Tang around her either is firmly against her or gets eliminated. It even gets tto the point where Scot, Jason, and Cydney team up together to make sure that Alecia doesn’t get an immunity idol, and it only just barely works, with Jason wrestling her for it before coming out as the victor. And after their subsequent challenge loss, Scot gives Alecia the opportunity to give up right then and there, and just forgo the inevitable decision at tribal council. And yet, Alecia fights to the bitter end. She’s adamant in not rolling over and giving up without every bit of fight she can muster. And despite what Scot and Jason may say in the moment, I’d be surprised if they didn’t respect her for that, especially considering how they too would have to cockroach along through the rest of the game.
I like to talk alot about the juxtaposition of characters. How different personalities can both complement and be at odds with each other. And I’m not sure there’s any better example of this than the relationship between Scot and Tai on this season. Because from the moment he’s swapped onto the new Gondol tribe, they get along pretty well and a genuine friendship seems to form. These episodes are especially interesting to me because this is the kindest light he’s shown in across the entire season. He’s just having fun and enjoying his time on a tribe that, despite continuing to lose, he’s seemingly happy in. The Anna vote is just a matter of fact decision. She’s the weakest link and is trying to stir things up, so she’s the one to go. The next vote though really does change the tune of the season, and of Scot’s attitude as a whole.
The Peter boot is interesting for Scot’s story. Not because of the episode itself, but because of the fallout that arises from it going into the merge. To him, Aubry’s indecisiveness and potential willingness to jump ship makes her someone that just cannot be trusted. And by the Nick vote, he’s pretty firmly on the bottom of the numbers. But just like Alecia wouldn’t simply roll over and give up, he’s not going to either. He’s going to hide the machete, dump water on the fire, and make everyone else’s lives miserable in the hopes of creating cracks. And the best part is that this isn’t a petty move for the sake of it. Just as Aubry herself says, “There’s no way Scot did this out of temper.” And his decision pays off. Debbie ostricizes herself from the group due to being riled up from Scot’s sabotages and gets sent home as a result. But all this time, despite Scot and Jason being on the bottom, they’ve still been working with Tai. They’re the devil on his shoulder to the angel that Aubry is being. And this all comes to a head in Scot’s boot episode.
At this point, Scot has not been shy about using dirty tactics if it means he can cockroach just that bit further and acquire just that little bit more power in the game. We of course see this in his actions around camp, but also in how he talks with others like Aubry, Cydney, Joe, and especially Tai. The interactions he has with Tai are particularly fascinating to me because at the end of the day, he’s trying to work with him. And he’s needing Tai to hold up his side of the super idol in order to keep him in the game. Even despite this, we see moment after moment of Scot talking down to Tai or quickly shooting down every one of his proposals. So from Tai’s perspective, he’s already setting aside his morals for the sake of the game by working with them, but then they’re belittling him despite needing his help. It, again, goes back to the point of Scot just being a bully. But with Alecia, she had no power. Her standing up to him affected nothing and simply didn’t matter other than prove her resolve. But with Tai, him standing up for himself is so much more impactful.
This tribal council is definitely up there for the greatest of all time, and that final “No” from Tai is an all time iconic moment in the show’s history. Not just for the moment in isolation, but moreso because of the buildup to it. Seeing Scot be the bad guy, then becoming friends with Tai, only to take advantage of Tai’s good nature too much, to the point that Tai feels his best option is to stand up to his bullies, and make a difference. He chooses to side with the heroes over the villains. One thing you should know about me is that I absolutely adore Tai and his story on this season. Tai 1.0 is easily top 10 of all time for me, and potentially a top 5 placement. And without Scot and his role on the season, Tai’s story wouldn’t have even half of the impact that it does. That is why I adore Scot. The season needed a villain like Scot, and without him and Jason, this season wouldn’t have a fraction of the life, soul, and complexity that it has. And that for me makes him more than worthy of a spot in endgame.
SMC0629: 13
DryBonesKing: 15
Zanthosus: 17
Tommyroxs45: 19
Regnisyak1: 24
DavidW1208: 23
ninjedi1: 18
Average Placement: 18.429
Total Points: 129
Standard Deviation: 3.994 (6th Lowest)

hi guys! just got off WL into WesternU COMP and have an A at Touro California. super blessed and excited.
In terms of what I'm interested in: rads, path, EM, and derm (I know)...
My heart is telling me WesternU Comp. But pls advise me here are some comprehensive pros and cons
WesternU COMP
PROS:
-closer to family (vv important to me)
-more prestigious?
-more access to research
-below copied from other posts

• Rotations are more centralized, so it'll be more convenient and you won't have to move around during 3rd and 4th year.
• Several of Western's rotations sites have residencies attached to them.
• Neither Pomona or Mare Island are booming metropolises, but I'd argue Pomona is a bit nicer.
• -matches to things I'm more interested in
• CONS:
• Ive heard western is WAY more OMM heavy

TOURO
PROS:
-true P/F
-cheap rent
-has gotten better at supporting its students
-HAD a really good match year this year
CONS:
-almost half match into prim care (IM SUPER not into this)

• campus is scary

-far away from family
-scehduling rotations during 3 and 4th year has students pulling out hair, and roations at western are more social (less moving).
I guess what it comes down to is the grading. Its like am I willing to sacrifice my sanity for HP/P/F etc.
If you have any advice pls lmk. Just worried about making a wrong choice.

Drinking beers playing family guy on my ps2 while visiting my mom and sister and giving myself a break from the pup
Hobbies: gaming, music, binge watching tv show or movies, coloring, drawing, puzzles(jigsaw, word search, 3d) makeup, board games, pool, darts, swimming, reading, hanging out with friends, calling friends, drinking, I have a huge heart for animals resucing and taking care of them
Gaming: anything besides tactical and sports
Movies &shows : horror, horror com, comedy, Fantasy,b-movies, cartoons,crime
Music:rock mainly a bit of metal,rap,r&b and singing

Hey y’all, so I dated this guy during high school and my freshman year of college (2020-23 inclusive) and he took me to South Africa for a trip with his family because that’s where he was born. The trip was awesome, I loved everywhere we went and all the things we did. Probably the best trip of my life so far. We broke up a while after on somewhat good terms and went no contact shortly after. We go to the same university so I sometimes see him around campus (we don’t speak or anything). We were also kinda part of the same friendship group but I’ve drifted from them because I don’t really want to linger in his life and vice versa. Pretty sure he has a new gf now anyway.
Basically the point of all of this, I would LOVE to go back to South Africa for another trip. I’m wondering if it’s quite weird to do that, seeing as I only like it because he took me there and is South African. I have no South African background, just genuinely love the place. Obviously he isn’t in my life anymore so I shouldn’t care what he and his family thinks. But I know he will probably eventually find out through mutual friends. I know he can’t be defensive/protective over a place, but just wondering if it will seem obsessive or weird to him, his family and my friends.
Sorry for the long post. Any advice is greatly appreciated. Be brutally honest, thanks!!

So, this is my first time writing on reddit.
I (m21) found out my ex (m24) cheated on me. We have known each other since June last year, we met just a couple weeks after he broke up with his long-time boyfriend of 6 years. We live 1 and a half hours away from each other. I live in Brisbane; he lives in the countryside. So, every weekend we were always together. We started officially dating in September. I was only out at the time to my friends, not to my family, so getting into this relationship was a bit scary because he was out and proud. It’s funny because in the beginning he would try to accuse me of cheating, tell me he’s scared of me cheating, but I would’ve never done that. I loved him. Turns out, he was the one cheating.
In December last year, he told me to respond to an Instagram message for him. After I sent it, I saw a message he had sent this guy, A, he commented on his story, something flirty and it caught my eye. I confronted him about it. He admitted to being “lonely” and wanted to talk to him. Then he tells me he thought the guy was attractive. He was a friend of one of his co-workers. My ex only saw this guy once! Anyways, he would block this guy, then unblock him, then block him again, etc.
There have been times where I’ve had to confront him on a lot of stuff. For example, his ex. He told me his ex was blocked; he would never talk to him but that was all a lie. I would see notifications from his ex, he would tell me, his ex would create all these accounts just to get in contact with him, which that part was true but my problem was that he would never tell me but he never understood why that was a problem. When we went away for our six month anniversary last month, we wanted to watch Netflix but the Netflix on the hotel TV wasn't working so he told me to get his laptop and we'd watch "Is It Cake?" on there. His iMessage dings. He doesn't use iMessage. I see a text from a number and it was like "how dare you use my trauma against me" and "I just want to talk." His ex was always asking for money and would say "I need to talk it's important" and it wouldn't be important. He was always asking for money. I asked him why he didn't tell me he was still talking to his ex, he just told me "he wanted to see the kittens. I said to him if he wanted to buy one, he could see them but if he wasn't buying one, I don't want him near me" and he told me it was no big deal and that he loved me. Told me he deleted and blocked the number but I went through his blocked list, the number wasn't there but I didn't bring it up. I just moved on and wanted to enjoy our holiday. Then, when I was getting my tyres done, he told me about some random number calling him twice and he sent me a screenshot. In the screenshot it showed his call log, like, his calling history. Turns out he was on the phone to his ex, through Instagram the night before after we said "goodnight" to each other. He then said "oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. My ex called me last night about the kittens, again." and I was pissed because how do you forget to tell someone that. We ended up having a huge fight about it, he said he feels bad for his ex because he has no family and all this stuff. All these excuses. Again, I ended up forgiving him and moving on.
Fast forward to Monday, I recieved a friend request on Insta from the guy I confronted my ex about back in December, A, and I knew what was happening but I just deleted his request but then he kept on requesting to follow me. I told my ex about it and he told me not to worry about it. Then, yesterday on Tuesday, all day, I had this sick feeling in my stomach because I had a feeling something was going to happen. Then that night, I received a message from his old co-worker she said "I think you need to see this" and I responded with a question mark because nothing had come through but then the screenshots and screen recordings came through. My heart sank. He has been messaging A since December and messaged him again when he got back from my house after celebrating his birthday with me (I spent over $300 on his presents) and my family (my mum bought me a couple presents too) early because his birthday is on a Monday and I can't be there. (He stayed at mine, Thursday, Friday, and went home on Saturday). That Saturday, was my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary lunch, where my nanna said to my ex "you're apart of the family now", which made me happy but I loved him and I loved that my family loved him but that same Saturday, he went home and texted A. When I was looking at the screenshots of the texts and screen recordings, the screen recordings showed he was on Tinder. I was fucking mad. I called him immediately and said "what the fuck!" and I started reading out the texts he would send this guy on Instagram and on Snapchat. The other guy, A, didn't entertain him. He would just ignore him or just have small talk but it was just my boyfriend doing the flirting but what broke me was when A asked my ex "who's the J in your bio" and my ex said "that's my boyfriend. We're in an open relationship." I felt my heart break into a million pieces. He basically confirmed everything, said he was on Tinder and said he was on Grindr, and he said he was last on Grindr "two days ago" and yesterday, two days ago, was Sunday. I was at his house, he would've been on it when I left his. I felt so many different feelings all at once, I felt like I was going to burst. I then, just went over to my best friend's house but both A and my ex, told me they haven't had sex and my ex told me, that even though he was on Grindr and Tinder, he didn't sleep with anyone just talked to a couple guys and that's it.
I obviously broke up with him yesterday but we're stilling messaging each other. I even called him last night after I got back from my friend's house and we spoke more about the situation. I know still having contact with him isn't good for me but I still love him. Even though we only dated for six-almost seven months, I still love him. I think because this is my first relationship, I want to cling on this but at the same time, I know I deserve better. I haven't cried yet. I don't think I will tbh. He keeps saying how he's sorry and how he feels guilty and all I can think is then why do any of this in the first place? I told him last night, if you were feeling this way, talk to me, hell even break up with me. I remember in the beginning our relationship, I told him that he'd have to break up with me because I don't like the idea of me breaking up with someone but hey, I broke up with him. He told me he had made some "big mistakes" and I said "you made choices. Not mistakes. Calling it a mistake is trying to avoid that the idea has a consequence" then he said "if you want me to suffer than just don't ever get back with me" and I said "I don't want you to suffer but no, I don't see us getting back together. I love you and I've forgiven you for the past shady shit you've done and I can forgive you for this but I will never forget it." I just can't be with him knowing he did this. I had this feeling for months that he was doing stuff behind my back and now that's it all confirmed, it makes me feel good now that I don't have to constantly worry about what my boyfriend is doing. I would worry so much it was making me sick. He would tell me he loved me, he wanted to marry me, he bought me a promise ring, he told me he wanted kids with me, told me he wanted to do everything with me. He told me how sorry he was, how guilty he felt because he said I'm the sweetest, kindest, caring, funniest and most loving person he's ever met and he's going to miss me heaps but all I can think about is like if he did love me, if he did think of me like that, why would he do what he did.
This morning, we were talking some more and I told him that even that I hated what happened, that I was still thankful for the memories because before him, I wasn't doing anything. I was just working and going to uni. My life was pretty boring but thanks to him, I found this confidence and I got all this self-esteem but even though it's only been a day, I can feel my confidence and self-esteem going away. I told my family this morning, well, I told my youngest sister (15) last night because she saw how upset I was and she said "you want me to beat him up" and my other sister (17), I told her this morning and she just called him a cunt and told me I'm better off. My mum, she loved my boyfriend so she was a bit disappointed in him but I was happy when she didn't react, she just sat there and listened to me and told me "maybe you two will work things out" and I told her "no, I don't think I can" and she said "and that's fine." I wish I could talk to my dad but I'm not out to him because he's like crazy homophobic even though my sisters have told me he's asked them if my ex and I were dating lol and said he's ok with it and will love me but I don't know, I'm just still scared to tell him. Maybe one day. My cousin (26) though, I'm very close with her, she's pan, I came out to her two years ago when we went to spread our aunties ashes (weird I know but we went for a walk and it felt right) and she basically told me "I knew it!" apparently everyone knew I was gay before I even came out. I honestly felt like I hid it well but nope. The only person who had no idea was my mum lol but my cousin told me, how she has never seen me happier and was so shocked when I told her that we broke up and the reason why. She thought he was a good guy. We all thought that.
On my grandparents anniversary card, they've been married for 50 years, which I mentioned above and I wrote "I hope I get to experience your type of love one day" in a sense that my ex and I, would end up celebrating our 50th wedding anniversary, even more in the future but unfortunately we won't but I know I will someday. One day. I'm only 21. I know not all guys are bad but for the mean time, I'll just be focusing on my assignments for uni, work, and getting back into the gym. It's been a while but I'm currently sitting in the library at uni writing this listening to a mix of fun songs and sad songs by Raye, Adele, Beyoncé, Lemonade hits different now that I can relate to the songs except Freedom because I'm not black. Love the song though. I'm white as paper. Milk even. I've been listening to Kim Petras, Ethel Cain, Miss Britney, Ariana Grande, again true story, bye and We Can't be friends hit different now. Who else? Rihanna, Megan thee Stallion, Glorilla, Bia, miss Olivia Rodrigo and some Taytay even though I'm not a big fan of miss swift, her pen game is strong. Respect. I've also been listening to Dua Lipa, Ayesha Erotica, Black Veil Brides, Queen Nicki, Billie Eilish, Chase Atlantic, The Neighbourhood, Charlie XCX, Kylie Minogue, Tate McRae, Villain of the Story, Loreen (Tattoo is amazing!), Doja Cat, also my guilty pleasure song, "Jam" by miss Kim K. I love her. I love a boss bitch. I've been told my music is very confusing. One minute I'm listening to "treat me like a slut" then Yungblud plays.
Anyways, I know I'll be alright.