How to do little pictures with the keyboards

Hi! This is going to be a long one/rant and story because I really don’t know who to talk to about this in real life because I’m not in therapy and I’m so embarrassed to be feeling this way knowing I made all the choices to be here and people are already flying in from out of state to come to our wedding. Also I’m diagnosed adhd incase any of yall are wondering what’s wrong with me once I tell you all the decisions I made to get here. I am getting married in three months and have a son who is 15 months old. My now fiance 28m and I 27f met whenever we were thirteen years old in middle school and started a tumultuous up and down / on and off again relationship. We were together all the way up until junior year in high school and we broke up. I come from a broken home and he does not. Looking back I realize how much of me staying with him and trying to keep his attention stemmed from my abandonment issues that I must have had from my own parents. After we broke up he joined a gang in my local hometown and I was still in love with him so I decided to still be involved with him even though I was not in a relationship with him. I ended up losing my virginity to him while we were not together just because I wanted to be with him and we said we were friends with benefits but really I was just in love with him and thought by doing that maybe he would want to be with me again but he didn’t and continued to sleep with other girls and do drugs. I also started doing drugs like Xanax and smoking to fit in with him and be cool. I ended up getting a horrible tattoo because one of the other girls he was also seeing had a bunch of tattoos. I dropped out of my high school college courses and ended up going to jail for marijuana in high school and got kicked out of cheer and softball. I ended up on probation and having to be drug tested for a year. Within that year after being heart broken and realizing nothing I did would make him change into who he was before he got involved in our local gang or make him want to be with me… I ended up enrolling in college and getting accepted to a university where I would move about two hours away from our home town to live on campus and study to be a nurse. While on probation, so I couldn’t really party or anything in college which was good (even though I was never really addicted to anything and it wouldn’t be that hard for me) I wanted to save money for a car so I ended up getting a job at the hooters next to my college and was in college full time and working at hooters. My sister happened to go to that same college before I did and live in that town with her ex bf and they would give me rides to and from work back to campus. Low and behold after about two semesters of me being in college and finally feeling like I was moving on from him, he came back messaging me and telling me he missed me and wanted to be with me again. I was stupid and so excited that I agreed and asked him to come see me at college where he would stay for the weekend and we would have an amazing time. I felt so good about myself doing what I was doing and being able to show my growth. Despite all that he was still able to convince me to leave school and come back to be with him and live with him and go to the college near our hometown and work at the hooters near our hometown. I had already felt like I didn’t want to be a nurse at the time because my sister who was a nurse told me you could never leave the state as a nurse if you get your license there (which she didn’t know at the time that you could) and I knew I didn’t want to stay where I was from and wanted to eventually travel. So I decided to leave and move back with him in his bedroom at his parents house where I would work at the hooters close to our home town and never enroll in the college. He would eventually break up with me while I was at work one day even though I was living with him and since I didn’t have a car he continued to take me back in forth from work and I continued to live with him and continued to be in love with him while he committed to the fact that he didn’t want to be in a relationship but wanted to marry me one day and just wasn’t ready for anything right now and still wanted to have sex with me which I did. From working at hooters I had auditioned for the calendar and ended up being really liked by the photographer and started doing some modeling from that which was super exciting for me because I always was interested in that and the pictures we took would blow up and I started getting well known in my area for modeling even though they were just pictures and I wasn’t making any money off of it. Eventually a guy came into hooters telling me about working as an exotic dancer and how much they could make and I still needed a car really badly and was desperate to get out of my ex’s (now fiance) house. So I told him I would be waitressing and that I heard the waitresses make good money there and asked him to give me a ride there one day and so he started giving me a ride everyday. The money was so good to me and the most money I had ever seen. I ended up staying in a hotel closer to the club I worked at and sometimes he would come stay with me and I would just uber to work. Eventually I had gotten a car which I was so happy about. A couple of weeks after I got a car I ended up getting sucked into human trafficking with a friend where I would live in a house with multiple girls for 6 months and go to work at the club every day of the week except Saturday and Sundays. I wasn’t doing anything extra just dancing but the money was going to some random guy. It’s crazy I know. I was stupid and young and my family were not concerned for me at all or involved in my life. unfortunately my friend is just now leaving that situation. I got out without anything no car or nothing and had nowhere to go so back to my exes I went where I decided I was going to buy a cash car again and I worked everyday like I was used to saved money and got a car. Moved to my sisters and stayed with her for a little where i decided I didn’t want to dance anymore and I got a job as a bottle service girl and then waitressing at another waitress. I continued modeling because it made me happy and I never told anyone the truth about the deep things that were happening in my life except for my now fiance. So nobody had no idea about me dancing or the human trafficking or anything. Everyone just knew I modeled. I ended up getting an apartment with some friends and One day I got the urge to go to California randomly and at my waitressing job I was handed $800 and I took it as a sign and booked a flight the next day. Where I went by myself my first time ever on a flight with no plans at all. The day I got there I got asked to be in a commercial two days later. My roommate and her friends flew out there to get me and she ended up being able to be in the commercial with me which ended up on tbs but I had to go back home to my apartment and responsibilities and couldn’t leave my roommate stranded. Even though months later we would end up getting in an argument and I’d move out and move back with my ex (now fiance) where I would continue to work and model (for free) and went back to the club to dance and then my sister ended up going to California for a travel nursing assignment and her and her bf broke up and she asked me to move with her. I had nothing else here, my ex was still saying he didn’t want to be in a relationship, he was consistently sleeping with other girls while we lived together and expected relationship things from me. I was paying for everything for him. I paid for him while he was in school for audio engineer, his gas, lunch, school clothes, shopping, I helped him open his own studio and bought his equipment and Mac for it, even though his parents were very involved in his life. I got all his family bday gifts and Christmas gifts every year. He was honestly just using me but I was so in love and blind. He encouraged me to go to California too so I had nothing else there for me, if he had told me to stay and he wanted to be with me I would’ve. I flew out on my 21st birthday and met my sister and Vegas where we would have such a great time and my ex spent that day hanging out with a girl that tried to fight me and didn’t even tell me happy birthday, I was crying in the bathroom in Vegas until my sister shook me and told me to get it together we’re in Vegas. I was so heart broken to be leaving him but he didn’t care. I got to LA and I instantly started modeling on day one I booked a photo shoot where I met a guy that reminded me of my ex (I know) but we instantly clicked and he was 7 years older than me. We ended up talking for a little bit and pursuing something even though I wasn’t ready emotionally but he didn’t really care and I was kind of star struck a little because he was a music producer for a very famous musician and he was very persistent but that’s another story. I ended up booking a music video as a main girl for my ex’s (now fiance) favorite artist. When it came out it was crazy because I felt like the universe and God was just blessing me for leaving that situation and I knew he would see it because he was so obsessed with that artist and it shook up the whole small town I was from. After that I booked a lot of cool jobs like Sephora and worked with a lot of companies, and did some music videos for other super famous artists, and walked in fashion shows and modeled for clothing brands etc. I was working all the time as an extra to pay my bills and I was meeting cool people. I was always getting invited to celebrities parties and just having such a fun time. I decided to start getting into acting instead and started going to acting school where a lot of well known celebrities also went to and I started having meetings with very popular directors and I was being mentored by famous directors and another person that created an tv entertainment channel that I won’t say here also mentored me a lot and got me a lot of meetings with these people and would go to dinners and stuff etc with a list celebrities. I truly was living the life. And coming from where I can it was almost a dream. I had gotten in a relationship my first year there with that other guy I mentioned who ended up being super possessive of me but he treated me like a queen in the sense of paying for everything, giving me a safe space to tell my feelings, open up, the sex was amazing, he would take me on trips, took me out of the country for the first time. We ended up not working out due to lifestyle differences and just being at two different places and wanting different things. He wanted to move out of the country and have a farm and I wasn’t ready to do that as I wanted to focus on my career. (But I would die to move out of the country on a farm now ironically and he is doing just that now like he said he would haha) anyway, I ended up having my own studio apartment by myself that I loved so much and was so proud of. My sister had moved to Montana and it took a lot for me to get my apartment like staying in a house with other girls for a little to sleeping in my car and at a spa for a couple days. When I would fly home or drive home to see my family I would always see my ex, everytime. We kept a friendship and sometimes I would still help him out if needed, he was interning at a church through his school for audio engineering and recording people at his studio in our hometown. By this time I was going to New York and Miami also sometimes and doing work there. I wasn’t as stressed about bills anymore. I was seeing guys every now and then but not at all interested in a relationship, my heart was still healing from the past and both my exes but mainly my first (now fiance). I was super focused on my career and optimistic, I was used to the grind and in no way ever thinking of quitting. It just wasn’t an option because I knew I would make it wherever that would be because to me that is all I had for me and all I ever knew I wanted and the only thing that saved me. Skip to around October 2019 I had found out about a girl my ex was seeing and it crushed me. He was doing with her just like he was with me though. Just “friends with benefits” I was living in my apartment in LA still and my uncle that helped raise me was getting really sick back home and put on hospice so I decided to take a trip back to see him. I would go to restaurants in my state and near my home town and people would ask to take pictures with me, and at the little ceasars drive through someone asked if I was me and stuff it was crazy because I hadn’t been home in awhile and I felt like what I was doing was finally paying off and people were recognizing me. It was surreal. I ended up going to see my ex. I had such a fear of losing him to this other girl for some reason. I was so scared he would get her pregnant or get in a serious relationship since I was gone so far away and I would never be with him, I would end up sleeping with him again and the girl found out and drove by his house mad and cussing me out and throwing stuff at me. We ended up getting in a fight which is so embarrassing and beneath me. I ended up crying to him that I wanted to be with him and don’t know why he never wanted to be with me which at this time he honestly was not even in my playing field anymore. He told me if I wanted to be with him I had to move back to my hometown.. my heart dropped to my stomach and I knew it wasn’t what I was supposed to do but I said okay… all because this is what I had wanted all those years. I decided to stay where the next two years all I would think about everyday was I was making the wrong decision and needed to go back to my life. My hometown had nothing for me.. COVID hit a couple months after me being there and we were terrified. We ended up getting everything out of my apartment and moving into a house around the corner from his parents. I had to tell him how I liked to communicate now without yelling and stuff which I learned from the boyfriend I had in LA and that I wasn’t going to put up with that disrespect but he never listened. Eventually everything went back to normal. I ended up going back to the club again dancing because I didn’t want to go backward and model here. He never wanted me to go back to LA even for a little bit even though that’s where my career and heart was so I had no idea what to do with my life. I started waitressing as well and getting back on my adhd meds. People started pressuring us to get pregnant and we tried for a year and 6 months. The month I found out I was pregnant before I knew, I quit my job and decided I was going to move back and get my life back. Two days later I found out I was pregnant…. Finally after trying for over a year. Our relationship was toxic just like the past he always yelled, I could never talk to him about my feelings without him saying I was trying to fight, he spit in my face once, threatened me, put his hands on me, he would tell me he was going to take my baby away from me as soon as I had it. I started asking him about getting married while I was pregnant and the proposal wasn’t even that. He got mad at me for asking one day and walked in the room and handed me the ring. It didn’t fit because I was pregnant & it was $27 (not that that matters but the proposal sucked).. he drained both my bank accounts and they closed it, charged my credit card up and put me in debt, he has not let me do anything I want to do like school or anything. He is so bad with money. He has an action figure addiction and at one point was spending 3k on action figures every month and turned one of the rooms in our house into a collection room so I had to take everything out of my closet and put my sons crib in there for the first year of his life. we have good times and I feel comfortable with him. He knows everything about me but he doesn’t respect me and sometimes I feel like he is intimidated by me. The sex isn’t good at all we always just ask “do you want to have sex” he never gives oral or foreplay, I never get pleasure. He’s an amazing dad though and loves his son. We have the most sweet and beautiful little boy now who I love so much and he loves him also. He’s very attentive to his son. But I still feel unheard. I can’t talk about my feelings. If I do it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t change anything. He is so defensive and we never communicate for a solution it’s always just pointing fingers. I have started yelling again because I’m so used to it now and I hate it because I grew up like that and I finally grew out of it until I got back with him and recently started again and now he throws it in my face and knows I begged him not to do it forever but he never stopped and now I am too. I’ve asked him to take me to the movies and he hasn’t still. I just ask for more romance and stuff but it just feels like I have a roommate. I have nothing now. I had my car and we traded it in for a new car that he wanted. I always dreamed of the next car I’d get once I paid it off but he got it & it’s in his name now so I paid it off for nothing. I’m driving around his dream car. I’ve been planning our wedding since I birthed our son and everything is going good. Money is tight. He works at the church now full time and makes about 45k a year or so, my son has been waiting to start daycare for awhile so I have been home with him. I’ve tried starting jobs multiple times but he is against it unless it’s super fast money like going to the club which I am so repulsed by and absolutely hate it now. I tried going back to college but my old college won’t release my transcripts for fasfa because I owe them money. I started cosmetology school a few months ago which he was all for but two months in freaked out and him and his mom guilt tripped me that we can’t handle this right now and he was having a hard time doing the night time routine for the baby while I was at school so I had to leave and now owe that’s school for my kit unless I enroll again in 128 days. I also miss modeling so much and sometimes think I can start again but it’s been five years. My body is so different too after a baby. Everything I want is a no go. Especially moving out of our hometown. He says he wants to but I don’t think he does. We are constantly at his moms and dads and they tell us all the time we aren’t moving anywhere which is really hard for me as this place is super toxic for my soul. Anytime I get money he spends it. Anytime I save money he spends it. Even if it does go towards our bills. His action figure habit is almost nonexistent now and he has grown a lot in the past few months from that since I demanded my son have his own bedroom after his first bday and all his figures are in boxes now and told him he could turn the shed into his man cave. He says we can’t save because we have nothing to save after bills but I believe in saving anything even $5 a paycheck. It’s doable. I grew up poor so this is nothing to me but after living the lifestyle I lived in LA and going out with guys that respected me and cherished me it’s hard. I know nobody is perfect but we are about to get married and I’m scared… I have nothing though anymore. I’ve threatened to leave a couple times and he says he will take me to court and take my baby. I’m scared he might. I don’t want my son to be angry like him or not respect women how he does. In public he’s a saint. He also has a very supportive family that it’s almost toxic. They all blame me for his anger issues and say I make him that way. But he’s been punching walls since I met him in 8th grade. I know it’s not because of me. But I have nobody else and nowhere else to go. No money. No car. I’m at the bottom again where I was before. Only difference is now I have a son. And we are getting married in three months and I can’t call it off. I am older now and looking back on my life I realize he maybe truly never loved me and I was just so desperate for love. I got myself here nobody else. I accepted everything, even when my gut told me not to. ( he is not just horrible, he’s a great person just with some bad qualities like everyone but I’m tired of feeling stuck with someone that never truly wanted me and doesn’t care to grow in some ways or show me )
Please help.. what do I do?

Hi everyone! I'm looking for a simple gaming laptop that's capable of just the Sims 4 and Minecraft. With the Sims 4 it would need to be able to handle A LOT of custom content and mods. I'm not an avid gamer and would probably only play for a couple hours two or three times a week so it doesn't need to be fully maxed out.
LAPTOP QUESTIONNAIRE

• Total budget (in local currency) and country of purchase. Please do not use USD unless purchasing in the US: $300-$350
• Are you open to refurbs/used? Yes, names of credible sources would be helpful.
• How would you prioritize form factor (ultrabook, 2-in-1, etc.), build quality, performance, and battery life? Decent sized capacity for mods, doesn't overheat quickly, would prefer good graphics, and has a battery that can last for at least 5 hours.
• How important is weight and thinness to you? Not too important as I would only play at home since I have a regular school laptop.
• Do you have a preferred screen size? If indifferent, put N/A. At least 13 inches preferably.
• Are you doing any CAD/video editing/photo editing/gaming? List which programs/games you desire to run. No editing of any kind at all. Strictly gaming.
• If you're gaming, do you have certain games you want to play? At what settings and FPS do you want? Sims 4 and Minecraft. Would mainly be building in the Sims 4 so as little lag as possible.
• Any specific requirements such as good keyboard, reliable build quality, touch-screen, finger-print reader, optical drive or good input devices (keyboard/touchpad)? Comfortable keyboard as I have other hobbies that can also put a strain on my wrist.
• Leave any finishing thoughts here that you may feel are necessary and beneficial to the discussion. I know absolutely nothing about laptops and computers so I'm not even sure if what I want is possible lol but any suggestions or advice would be much appreciated.

I’m looking for some general legal advice as a safeguard for my mum. My wife (32 F) and I (33 M) have decided that it would be best for my mum to move in with us after she had some serious health problems. My mum is currently in the hospital, and it is likely she will need some mild level of care once discharged and living at home. We’ve collectively decided that it would be easiest for everyone if she moves in with us so we can care for her accordingly. My mum currently owns her house outright (father is not in the picture), no mortgage and she had her will drawn up about 4 years ago. The will essentially states that her property etc. will go to me, her only son.
For context, I’m looking at this more as a protection of her share/asset in the unlikely event of a divorce between my wife and me. It’s been decided that we will sell her house and use the cash to purchase a larger property. My wife and I would obviously take on the excess cost of the loan. The cash from the sale would make up a little over half of the total sale price of the new house. We were thinking of including all 3 of us on the title of the house, however I’m wondering if this is enough ‘safeguard’?
Is there anything legally my mum or I can do to protect her share? Is it just a matter of changing her will? A legal agreement between the three of us? A postnup?
Alll suggestions and comments welcome and appreciated. I’m not too sure how to navigate but feel it may be wise to consider having something legal in place?

Me (25F) and my partner (26M) have been together for almost two years, and after all I’ve learned since finding about his PA I’m stuck as to what I should do next. We had previously discussed the topic of porn quite early on in our relationship, which we both agreed on having watched, but I assumed this was something we had BOTH left in the past as now we have eachother, no longer having a need for it. In November 2023, at the end of a 3 month vacation with him, I find he had casually been viewing porn a couple days in a row. I questioned him, said he only views it casually so I didn’t press him further on the topic. Since then, he has proceeded to watch and read porn almost daily, multiple times a day WHILE at work, and has thought paying for an OF and sexting the creator was a great idea (March of this year). I had forgiven him for the OF deal (turns out the creator he subbed to wasn’t even a real person, just a scam account lol) , definitely haven’t rebuilt the trust I initially had for him, but we both agreed to delete the account together and he made it pretty clear he wouldn’t touch OF again, which he has actually stuck by his word.
After this, things only seem to get worse after finding history regarding erotic stories, involving topics of VERY underage girls which 100% crosses every line. I used to get so excited thinking about creating a life with this guy, having kids, but now I fear thinking about having a child, a girl, with someone who fantasises and gets off to content involving very dark daddy/daughter stuff. I understand the kink, but when finding erotic stories your partner is reading involving grown MEN with 10 year olds, it’s heartbreaking. I did confront him about this, and he promised me he would never hurt someone like that. Deep down, I know he’s being honest, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that his addiction has become so bad that he feels the need to look up this stuff just to get off. I’m tired.
He has always treated me so well, is affectionate, supportive, loving, never has been a drop in our sex life, we spend literally every spare moment together and yet he’s doing stuff like this behind my back. It’s really difficult seeing first hand how these addictions ruin good people. I know he has a good heart, but I can’t picture a future with someone whose thoughts and mind have been so badly distorted by such a horrible addiction. I don’t really know what the right thing to do is. I don’t know how to bring it up again without sounding like I’m obsessed about the topic.
If someone could just give me a little piece of advice, it would be much appreciated.

Ok this might be a bit long... I'm in the state of Massachusetts and been on workers comp since October of 2021. The limit here is 3 years and this October makes it the 3. Everything's was going good and adjuster always paid my checks bi weekly and most my meds. I temp at my job went crazy and attacked me with an almost 2 foot pipe wrench that weighed at least 20 lbs. I was in my car and he destroyed it along with my face head and shoulder. I was knocked out for I really don't know how long but was pouring blood everywhere. Me and this man never had an issue or words at all. So I was sitting in my car eating lunch and was dark since I worked 2nd shift and there was basically no supervisors on my shift. I don't really eant to get more into the assault but will say I had eye damage esp. from the glass from the first strike through my window that knocked me out. My shoulder was injured and motion is back but couldn't finish PT due to my migraines which got better but with quilipta and zavzperat spray and Botox injections from a nuero. I still get them and triggered by certain things but did improve a bit since 2021.this man was not even clocked him my boss invited him to live there and sleep at the warehouse whenever the office went home and he would come since he was homeless and sleep wake up drink and just very odd guy which me and a co worker complained many times about his drinking and making us uncomfortable and my boss would just laugh. So they knew there was negligence and co operated fully and so did workers comp up until few months ago started sending me to imes which is when I finally got an attorney.my state can't use for apin and suffering when it comes to workers comp. The thing I face know which I did have anxiety and depression a bit in the past and was in and out of therapy through the years with self medicating before that around 2008 off and on also due to my brother's death. Since this assault though wow I panic daily about little things. Extremely scared to drive or leave the house. My family does almost everything for me and I'm a 37 yr old male. I'm on about 12 meds total and 9 is for mental health. I am diagnosed with post concussion syndrome, agoraphobia, depression, anxiety and insomnia. Of course the imes the insurance sent me to treated me so bad the first was a neurologist and tried to treat me as a psych patient the second wasn't rude and was actually a psychiatrist but could tell was not listening at all to me and wrote I have no issues and I am all good just like the first time. My attorney sent me to his own ime that will say just based on my pictures and medical records that I am disabled for life. My neurologist therapist and psychiatrist all wrote great letters but said they don't know if or when I will get better but also didn't say I am disabled for life and that's what my attorney is looking for but said the letters will help and are greatly written esp. how it goes against the imes. He said the judge knows how it goes insurance gets there guys they pay 900 to to make a report and my attorney gets his guy and plus treating Dr s that the hospital recommended through occupational therapy. My memory is very bad and sorry if I'm all over the place. My question is I have court on June 4. Saw my attorney Dr. Yesterday. Today attorney called me to talk about the case. He said you're payments stop October anyway and I'm sure I can get it to that but October comes the judge can cut off all money or extend it 4 years of checks but cut in half which is like 43000 in them years he said he would like to fight for full life long disability but due to my age being 37 it's an uphill battle but doesn't mean he can't get it but if I was in my mind 40s he said he'd have full confidence getting it. That's one my questions about the age thing also he told me they said well we would offer about 45000 to settle and a little more to settle the mental part of it he laughed at them he said. He said I can get you 100,000 but probably and this is all jus predicted but about 75,000 before I pay him his 20%. I really don't know what to do. I'm afraid it's such a low amount for head I jury and sever mental trauma where I don't have friends anymore and don't leave the house and pa ic non stop. Also want to be done with this and try and move on like my dr.s said maybe you'll start healing once this is behind you. I do have mass health insurance and they fill a lot scripts no problem when workers comp should be. So my attorney thinks it's fully up to me and court is less then 2 weeks and it takes him about a week to put together a settlement amount request hes cobfident about 75,000 i said i need to think hes said of course. I'm thinking I should ask him I won't take less than 80,000 but look more for 85,000 or little more. More I get he gets I know. I just don't want to piss him off he's very intimidating blunt straight forward guy. Any similar stories and advice should I say ok go for 75 or should I say try for 80 or85,000. I feel like if he thought he could get it he would since he gets a percentage. Sorry for the long rant guys. Any advice is helpful,tia.

The necropolis was gorgeous, for what it was. Its white outer walls hiding the darker Victorian Gothic interior. The tech that was hidden in the walls though was able to move bodies in their caskets from a designated place in the necropolis to the "viewing area" as the necropolians called it. This was where I waited for my, for lack of a better term, escort to take me to the mortuary. Since science has grown surprisingly fast our abilities for forensic sciences have also grown, and that's to whom I was headed. (S)He was an, unusual (wo)man to say the least. An expert in their field and about as learned as a doctor, if not multi-doctorate. If you ever asked them why they never pursued an actual doctorate, they would get angry and act all prissy while saying that going to school would've slowed them down and all they needed were the basic certificates for their work. The reality though, revealed to me during a drunken bout, they just never liked school and believed that it ultimately stunted a person's growth and ability to question the reality around them, that everything that you need to learn is already in books and in some form or another in digital content online. They were brilliant, if a little wacky. About five minutes after I had arrived and was sitting down in the viewing area, a little box rolled up to me making a couple of beeps to let me know to follow it and immediately started rolling towards the wall opposite of where it came from. When it looked like it was about to hit the wall, a hidden door opened up by the casket viewer, inside was a set of stairs leading down into the darkness. Stepping through the doorway I became acutely aware of sounds seemingly coming from all around me suddenly. It really is impressive, as though I just stepped from a tomb to a busy workshop, the sounds of gas escaping pistons, whirring, and clanking chains flooded my ears. I continued down the stairs following my helpful little box, which despite its size and shape would suggest was actually quite nimble on the stairs. It seemed to have wheels that would extend down to the next step as the edge rolled over it and once the back of the box was clear of the step it would drop back into its squat position, hiding its wheels as quickly as possible. It continued to do so the entire way. The box seemed to notice me watching it and made a kinda shrill whistle and its undercarriage light went from a comfortable yellow to a, is that... Peach? Is it blushing? My god I think it is! I let out a small chuckle and my little blushing box stopped dead in its tracks mid-step, its light suddenly going white, almost blinding me from behind and lighting up the hallway for a split second. Luckily both of my feet were solidly on a step so I didn't take a tumble or anything, but I couldn't help doing anything but laughing harder. After a second the little box crept up behind me and continued down, its status light continuing to show pinkish. I followed it slowly, the chuckle slowly dying in my throat as we reached Ceriths office. Well "office" was being nice. Morgue, mortuary, both of these fit just as well. Cerith was, for the most part, a recluse. We reached the door and the little robot continued through a little hole in the wall. I waited a second and knocked. "Enter!" Came the voice on the other side. I opened the door and stepped through. Along one wall set doors that normally housed the dead waiting to be processed. One out of dozens were open, its occupant missing from its silver slab. The middle of the room was brightly lit from a single overhead light. In the middle of the circle of light stood a figure, long Raven colored hair bound in a single braided ponytail, the rest of them bound in medical examination garb. They seemed to be engrossed in the corpse in front of them. The little robot rolled up next to Ceriths feet and made a little chiming noise. "Thank you Tabitha. That'll be all," said a voice that was neither male nor female from beneath the mask. Just sort of in the middle. "Tabitha? Never knew you to be sentimental," I said gently, the chuckle in my voice making itself clear. "I see you still find even the darkest things funny," Cerith quipped back. "My line of work Cer, you take the laughs where you get them. Look who's talking anyway, you're usually elbows deep inside someone 25/8. Even you have a seriously fucked up sense of humor." That got Cerith laughing, sounding like thunder and the whip crack of lightning at the same time. "You've got me there Julius," Cerith said after his laughter subsided. I think he suits him today. Which is both a good and bad sign. When Cerith is acting like a man, it usually means some grim news, but they are going to try to make it seem like not a big deal and laugh a lot. Plus they almost never call me Julius. Something was wrong. Very seriously wrong. As this realization hit me I got this odd tingle in the small of my back. Like someone had put several freezing needles under the skin and into my spine, something I'm familiar with from the anima-games from the cyber sphere. Halos: Divine Retribution If I remember right. Those Angels were sadistic bastards. I shuddered at both the memories from the game and the shockingly similar feeling I was experiencing. Dread, that feeling is dread my friend, the quiet part of my mind whispered to me. "Cer, what's wrong bud," I asked. He didn't say anything. For a long time. After a few minutes I was about to ask again, but then he spoke. And what came out will haunt me, quite possibly till the day I die . "This ones temporal lobes are gray matter. Nothing even close to being coherent. Just. Dead neurons. And he's not the first." Gone was the jovialness of the past ten minutes. This was Cerith the whisperer. In an almost dead tone they continued, "the others didn't fare nearly as well as this one. Most of the brain is intact here, which means that if they didn't deliver a massive shock or something similar to fully kill him he would have possibly lived as a vegetable with memory issues, but that's not what I'm looking for in this one here now. Now I'm trying to figure out what else the others had in common with him, and so far that's brought up all but naught. Well this one has a bit of liver damage. But that's about it. So Mr John was a drinker. Not much there." When Cerith is "whispering" the best thing to do is just let him be. But I couldn't help but prick my ears up at mentions of others with similar wounds, and the fact that this one had liver issues.... "Cer. You said... CERITH," I finally snapped out and caught his attention mid ramble. "Thank you. You said liver problems. But nothing similar to the others? No drugs? Alcohol? Not even a synth brain-pattern? You checked Everything?" "Well let's see, John here was a drinker that's for sure," Cerith said his hands never ceasing their work as he started to put 'John' back together seemingly satisfied that he found nothing else, " Mr Lombardo in chest 3 had cocaine mostly, and Mr Lei in chest 9 had opium. Although to tell you where it came from for both I'd have to do a molecular analysis and see what it compares to. Other than that, no. Absolutely nothing connecting any of them. As far as I can tell they are all unique cases completely separate from each other except for the damages to the brain. And I only found this by accident. During a routine scan I happened to look at the screen as it passed through the brain and noticed an odd density in his temporal lobes. Just slightly higher than normal. Hell to be honest with you it had the density of a fresh cutie, you know those little oranges?" I nodded, and he continued, "Right of course you do, who hasn't? Anyways it's just super dense compared to the surrounding tissues, and I take a sliver probe and drop it in like you do. And when I turn the damn thing on to look at the neurons the area all I see are dead cells packed on top of one another. Not natural decay death, but forced to die. Most of the cell walls were torn open like they had blown up from the INSIDE. That's when I called you." He finished up with 'John' putting the final few perfect stitches in place and sealing him up for good. Once he seemed happy with his work he called out to his seemingly empty morgue, "Grom I'm done! Can you put Mr John Doe here back in his room? Number 11 if you please." He turned away from the body on the table and removed the giant rubber gloves that went to his elbows. He walked into the dark calling out over his shoulder, "I'll be back in a sec I gotta scrub out, want a drink? I have beer, whiskey, vodka, I might have some Cognac somewhere, and bourbon. Your choice, just call out what you want and Tabitha will be there with it. Also have a seat! We have much to discuss." With that he disappeared from both sight and sound in the dark. It was a neat trick I have to admit, and it had something to do with how he had his morgue set up. Even the giant war machine that was Grom was absolutely quiet unless you managed to catch him through the gloom. I thought for the longest time the reason why I could never catch him sneaking around was from some sort of stealth program put into place, but when he goes up and down those stairs he's as loud as can be. So it was definitely not his program but the way the morgue was built. I'm confident in saying that because when I turned back to look at the table, or rather where it was, there was now a chair that looked like it had just grown out of the floor and the body was gone. Also the thought of something as big as a fridge just sneaking up on some poor combatants and snapping their necks as quietly as he walks in the morgue just gives me the heebies. As I sat in the chair a thought occurred to me. Considering how advanced the morgue seemed to be it would make sense that it had some sort of AI or integrated computer. "Computer?" I had been here a million times but I'd never had a chance to think about it nor try anything. But not even a second after I had said anything a response came. "Yes Detective Julius. My name is DANNA. Or Dynamically Actualized Neural Net AI. How can I be of service?" The voice seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere, slightly feminine and breathy, all service but no sex. Honestly I was just surprised that it worked. "DANNA, I was just wondering if I could take a look at the files that Cerith had mentioned? If it is as bad as they claim I think I might need to know anyway. Also if you can get those blood works done for me I'd appreciate it. Also something with whiskey or rum would be amazing." "Of course Detective. I will have Tabitha bring it shortly. And how would you like the information to be displayed? Desktop or dynamic?" That piqued my interest. "Dynamic please." No sooner than I had said a series of screens blinked into existence in front of me. It was some sort of Holographic display. I reached out and touched the display and was surprised that I got stopped by something. It was hard but surprisingly I found that I could push into the screen with my finger if I pushed hard enough. It kinda felt like... Oobleck. I also found that by pinching the corner I could pull the screens closer or further from me. I even found that I could grab individual pages of the reports off the screen and hold it. It felt like a thin sheet of plastic and responded like both a tablet and a singular document. If I switched pages the old one would appear back onto the screen and the next would pop onto it. This was about as slick a set up as I had ever seen and whistled my appreciation under my breath, I'm definitely going to have to ask Cerith about where they got DANNA from. "See something you like, big boy?" A very DEFINITELY female voice said in my ear from behind, soft and throaty, screaming come hither. I felt small dainty hands gently caress the tops of my shoulders before slipping down the front of my chest, pulling me back into the chair that I didn't realize I had been slouching in. "You know better than that, Jules. Your back is important and slouching will destroy the muscles and cause some to atrophy." The voice left no room for argument, and left me more than a little bit flushed. I closed my eyes and dropped my head back as far as it would go, the back of my head hitting something soft and warm, stretching my neck and back out. "Damnit Cer I thought you were scrubbing out, not completely changing." I hadn't realized it, but at least an hour had passed from when I started playing with the computer and working with the files if the clock on the computer was to be believed. "You looked like you were pretty into it so I decided not to disturb you. Plus you know how much fun it is for me to tease you like this. Especially after, well these..." One hand waved at the screens in front of me. The small hands' nails were painted the darkest black and almost made them blend into the void that existed outside of the screens. "I do Cer, and that's part of the problem, we both know that it's never going to happen. Least of all for you." She laughed a little, a clear beautiful sound and the body beneath my head bounced slightly telling me I was against her stomach. "Still I know you enjoy these little moments," she said, the pressure on the back of my head disappearing and was replaced by the voice right by my ear again as she whispered, "especially when we both know that's not at all true." At the last words she nibbled my ear gently. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her, in spite of my baser instinct rising to meet her VERY juicy insinuations. But for as long as I've known Cerith and as many times as we have both been VERY drunk, they have NEVER cashed in. I just assumed that it was a quirk of theirs. "Anyways," she said standing back up, "what are you thinking so far about the files? Spooky, right? Like I said, nothing that I can see connects them." Her hands gestured in front of me in an approximation of a shrug. She then clasped them together, wringing the knuckles and effectively trapping me in the chair and back against her abdomen. I scrubbed my eyes with my fingertips acutely aware of the growing headache that suddenly made itself known. "Your right from the medical side. I can't see everything you can, of course. I don't have near the knowledge that you have," which is true being that Cerith is at least 200 years old. I never asked directly, the old adage still holding about women and their age. Still though her answers to certain questions would lead one to believe her being her first adult car was a Bing Cherry 2201 Firebird GT with white walled hover trim and chrome accents. From pictures that I could find it looked like a slick piece. Looking back to the screens I couldn't help but feel that itch again. I couldn't explain it. That prickly feeling of ice needles again, this time in the back of my skull. As much as I'd hate to admit it. I think Cerith is right. I sighed heavily before saying "send me everything. I'll open a new case file and have the team start working on it first thing." She made a happy noise and bounced slightly, clearly satisfied with my decision to take it on. I reached out and to my left and a glass was placed gently into my hand by Tabitha. I hadn't even realized she had come over while I was working and was now ready for that drink. Room temperature rum and cola. The drink went down smoothly enough considering I drained the glass in one gulp, during which time I finally got a good eyeful of Ceriths current form. Or rather the underside of part of it. From what I could tell she was wearing a black T-shirt. That was it. I put the glass back down, it's job done without moving my head and said, "What a lovely view Cerith. I'm guessing you chose this to try to get a rise out of me?" I couldn't lie though it was affecting me, but I couldn't let her know that. Not when she's like this. Otherwise she'll continue to tease me till she leaves me with the absolute worst case of blue balls this side of the City. Her hands came up and cupped my chin almost lovingly, and her voice said "Of course Detective. Do you not approve? Or would you rather I change back to my medical examination form? Or something else?" Her words dripped with implied sex. I groaned, loudly, and said, "This is fine. Jesus Cer." Before we could continue our most scintillating of conversations there was a sudden PING! And DANNA said, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but there's a message for you Cerith. It says 'If you can get to the department Cerith, do so. We need you to explain your paperwork. And if Detective Julius is still with you have him come in too.' signed the Chief. Would you like to reply?" 'shit, I forgot the morgue kills all signals,' I thought to myself as I stood up gently (regretfully) prying myself from Ceriths grasp with a, "duty calls. Need a lift?" I stretched gently, the scales in between my shoulders clicking appreciatively for the stretch, and turned around to notice she was indeed, just wearing a black T-shirt that hugged her voluptuous figure closely. The scales in my back clicked shut in surprise. Cerith let out a small cute chuckle, "I see after all this time I can still surprise you," she said blowing a kiss my way, reminding me of a little Gothic pixy. I rolled my eyes away from her and willed my scales to relax. I grabbed my jacket off the back of the chair, slinging it on and clicking the neck clasp shut under the cord that connected my scales to the unit in my head. I was awarded the cybernetics upon completing my training and getting all my licenses to have them. The force had allowed me to customize it, I had chosen top of the line. A dual unit with custom built AI. The individual scales were ceracoated titanium microprocessors all running in both series and parallel, and could move to expel heat or react. The main unit was the same except it was one solid unit that replaced a chunk of skull. Once that was done I zipped up the front of the leathers and ran the scales through the racer setting. They clicked and flattened against the outside of the jacket, securing it to my back. I shrugged making sure it was comfortable. "I'll take the fact that you're only in a t-shirt you'll be along shortly?" "Certainly detective." Her voice was filled with dismissive submission... And sadness? I looked back at her and noticed her makeup was gone. Or had she had any on in the first place? I gave myself a mental shake. There's no way. This was Cerith, veritable goddess of the necropolis. I put the last few minutes away for review later. Chief called. I have to go. On an instinct I thought long dead, I reached out and squeezed her hand. I felt a slight squeeze back. And then she let go with a, "Go on, be a good detective. I'll be along shortly." I left with Tabitha as my guide. Before Cerith disappeared into the darkness I thought I heard her whisper, "please don't leave." My scales raised in a saddened response. I couldn't be sure I heard her right though. If I heard her at all. I reached back and stroked them, knowing my ai probably heard her, and knowing it could feel me touch the scales. After a few seconds the scales settled down. 'I know buddy,' I thought to the AI. It couldn't respond like usual AI. The force thought that was too dangerous. What if it went rogue? What if it tried to kill the host and take over? The list went on and eventually they decided the basics were ok. When I got my unit one of the first things I did was jack it into a diagnostic to see what kind of hardware I was dealing with exactly because manufacturer specs from real use are sometimes different with AI if the bits and bobs are in place. When I did, all I got on the screen was 'Hello?'

Hi All,
Minor spoilers ahead
As the end of this story approaches, I’ve been thinking about how the whole story from Vessel (the first album with red tape) to Clancy works. I thought you might find it interesting.
I think, for me at least, the one lyric that is the most important to this whole thing is “I’ve got two faces, Blurry’s the one I’m not” from Goner. So a couple things here. 1. We know that part to Tyler identifies with Blurryface/ Nico as a part of himself, but also not. It’s a face of his, but not who he is. 2. If Blurry is one face, who is the other? This question is prefaced in Clear: “I wish that I had two faces, to see which theory works, yelling on the street corner or cleverly masking your words”
I think the answer is pretty clearly Clancy, the protagonist who is interestingly not names Tyler, cus he’s not Tyler, the same way Blurry is not Tyler. These two albums, Clancy and Blurryface, (I’ve listened to the leak) represent a total commitment to each face. It’s important to note, before we go any further, that Tyler is not either character but a combination of both. He is purposely not in the narrative of Trench and Dema. Never is Tyler mentioned, just these two parts of him.
Ahead, I’m gonna break down those two faces in each album, but before that we need to talk about Vessel. I dont know exactly how Vessel fits, but I find it super interesting that the word “Vessel” appears nowhere on that record. In fact, I don’t think it appears on any record… except for the Clancy recap where Clancy talks about how the Bishops can seize someone and use them as a Vessel.
I think that at some point, and I’m spitballing here, before the events that we’re clued into there was some situation where Clancy was used as a Vessel for Dema, similar to what happens in SAI. This would explain Vessel’s religious themes. Clancy makes a point of saying that Vialism, prehaps in line with Christianity as a whole, is a hijacked religion. There is real truth to it, but the Bishops have corrupted it. As Tyler looks for God in Trees, Holding Onto You, Screen etc, he is met with no real solution in modern church. In the same way, as Clancy is seized, he thinks he is on the right track, but finds no answer in service of Dema but has no real answer for himself either. Does he escape? Does he stay and just go along? Life isnt sooo bad in Dema, what could it hurt?
It’s fitting then that as Tyler deals with these questions about religion and mental health, he writes Truce, but a truce with evil is no real truce, and Blurry takes over. Over the course of that record, Tyler deals with all his insecurities, most of them false. This is the result of handing yourself over to, or trying to just live with, mental health/ living in Dema. Concerns about doing music the right way, people hearing his message right, loving his wife correctly sneak in and hold him hostage.
The record then sounds like it ends with a surrender. Goner is a surrender to Vialism, to ending ur self in order to feel better or, as Clancy says, to obatin salvation. But it actually isn’t a surrender, the last part of that song where Tyler looks his insecurity in the eye and reaches out for a God who he knows doesnt want this for him is key.
Why HeavyDirtySoul is the song used to illustrate escape from Dema is a little interesting then. In a way, I think that Blurryface isnt one straight drop into anxiety but a slow decline, so maybe escaping in Heavydirtysoul starts a cycle with Goner, for in Heavydirtysoul he’s asking God the same question “don’t let me be gone” and “can you save my Heavydirtysoul” can be seen as synonymous.
Anyway, having broken from Dema, at least in part, Trench is released, but it’s not the end. Tyler says multiple times in interviews that Trench is the place between where your going (Clancy) and where you’ve been (Blurry). Trench is a fantastic record, my personal favorite, and it fills in a lot of details, but as for big picture narrative and what I’m talking about here, it doesnt offer a lot. The same is true of SAI.
Clancy then is the intentional break and the end. To be honest, I’ll have to listen to it more to fill this in, but it seems to me as if Tyler is really seeking truth on this record. Who he should be is clear, and he’s not so much concerned with what people think, as doing the right thing. Loving your wife right (Craving), keeping good habits (Backslide, Snapback), and aging well (Oldies Station) all are more important here.

Hello,
Timestamp: https://imgur.com/a/oEPZo0W
Purchased this board off mechmarket month ago but I found our my F1-8X is my end game keyboard. Preference is given to local pick up near 07003. I have real hard time finding any defects; I can't 100% guarentee but pictures do very good representation of the condition of the keyboard.
Shipping to CONUS only
SINGAKBD Kohaku R2 BRG -- $1,200 Shipped

• Solder PCB built with Cherry MX Black (BI/L/F/SS) on Full Aluminum
• Cherry clip-in Stabs
• Matching KLC Kohaku x JJOCAP Artisan
• Linworks Green ABS Keycaps Little to NO Shine
• Carrying Case, Auth Card, Original Accessories

Thanks and let me know for any questions!

Ok so basically, a few weeks ago my friend set me up with this boy that he works with and I would like go to his work to see him and stuff like 3 times before we hung out which was today and honestly I just don’t know how I feel and I honestly don’t know what to do because I feel like an asshole for hanging out with him just to end up not knowing if I like him. Let me give a little background onto why i feel this way. First I dated this boy and he was my first boyfriend as well as my first everything so I truly did love him so much, ever since we broke up I feel as if I can never escape him he’s either on someone’s post or something involving him gets brought up or something he used to do gets brought up and like even today i just randomly see him. This makes it’s so hard to move on because i feel like I deep down still have hope for us even tho there isn’t any because we have each other blocked on everything. Beside that there’s also a situationship that’s been going on before and after me and ex broke up with this guy who is literally my human duplicate and I just feel like I also can’t get over him either. Now it’s not like there’s anything this boy lacks I mean he’s very good looking, when he came and picked me up he came to my front door, opened the car doors for me everytime, bought me food and coffee was just overalll really nice but he just doesn’t have the personality I see myself being with. I’m very loud and outgoing and constantly busy and I just love being active and with people and i especially love talking and he’s just very reserved and quiet and shy and I just don’t know if I’m into people like that I love when people match my energy and he just very different from me. I told my dad this and he said to give the boy a chance and so I said I would but after me and my ex broke up my aunt gave me a long lecture about men and it ended with her saying “ if you don’t picture yourself marrying this person and having a life with them then its just not your person” and it’s been stuck in my head forever and if I’m being honest, I just don’t see myself marrying someone like him I wanna be with someone who is more similar to me than different. My mom says opposites attract but I just don’t feel like it’s the same for me. What should I do? Someone pls give me legit good advice😄.

Pictures: https://imgur.com/a/2Lyqfap
TL;DR: Just discovered that a thing I’ve had on my eyelid for at least 11 years is probably a filiform wart. It has always been the same color and size, never grown or spread. How careful should I be with it now if I’ve never been careful before and in 11 years it’s never been a problem? Yes, I will go to a dermatologist, but it could be a while before I can afford to, so I'm seeking advice here in the interim.
Full story: I’m 41/m and have had this little “spot” on my left eyelid for years, right in the middle of my lash line. It’s about 2mm in diameter and 1mm or less in “height” (i.e., protruding from the skin). I always figured it was just a minor skin tag, no big deal, normal to get a few of those as you age. Never worried about it because it never grew any bigger, didn’t cause any pain or irritation, and it’s not even visible in most situations. I even had to specifically point it out to my partner who I’ve lived with for 6 years because they had no idea what I was talking about when I brought it up!
A couple weeks ago, while cleaning off some eyeliner, I suddenly decided to find out what it looked like up close, and took a few pictures I could zoom in on. The resulting image of what looked like a little sea anemone hiding in plain sight on my face was not what I was expecting, and after researching several possibilities online, I can’t find anything that it might be except a filiform wart — though I'm still not 100% sure.
I searched through older photos of myself to see if I could figure out how long it’s actually been there, and determined that it probably first showed up in early 2013 — I did a series of self portraits then and it's faintly visible in a few of them (though you wouldn't notice or guess what it was if you weren't specifically looking for it).
I'm eager to see a dermatologist (or ophthalmologist) when I can, but it might be a while. I was kicked off Medicaid in April because I got a small raise at work and I’m now just *barely* above the income cutoff. My new insurance has very high copays for seeing any kind of specialist, and since I'm already doing a sleep study this month to test for possible sleep apnea, it’ll probably be at least another month from now before I can find room in my budget to address this. I also don't have a new primary care doctor yet (the one I had been using doesn't take my new insurance).
Due to its location, I am NOT going to attempt any DIY removals!
Here's the part I'm a little confused about and looking for advice/reassurance while I wait to see a derm:
When researching filiform warts, I see two big warnings repeated over and over again. (1) They grow really fast; and (2) they spread very easily. So the advice is always something like: don’t touch it, don’t let anything else touch it, don’t share towels, throw away your makeup brushes, you might even have to wash your pillowcase every day so it doesn’t spread to other parts of your face, etc, etc.
The thing is, I’ve already spent 11 years treating it like a harmless skin tag (i.e., basically not thinking about it at all). I wash my face regularly and use the same towel for about a week before switching to a new one. When I wear occasionally wear makeup, I almost always use eyeliner pencils, and I never do anything to clean or disinfect them other than wiping them with a dry paper towel. My partner and I have even shared eyeliner! And while I can’t say I’ve ever intentionally picked at it, I have definitely done more than my fair share of scratching and aggressively rubbing my eyes over the years due to some pretty intense seasonal allergies.
But despite that total absence of caution, it’s never grown or spread at all or caused any problem or irritation of any kind!
Have I just been playing dice this whole time with an incredible streak of luck? Or is the internet just exaggerating how cautious you need to be? Is this a sign that this isn’t a wart at all? Or is it possible for the “remnants” of a wart to stick around even after the virus is gone, and that’s why I’ve been so lucky?
I’m also wondering if it’s normal for a filiform wart to change its “look” as much as mine does (without actually growing or dying). In the photos I’ve included, you can see how it sort of changes its shape (i.e., whether the “fronds” are stretched out or contracted) depending on conditions like how dry or wet my skin is, whether I’m stretching my eyelid, or even whether my eyes are irritated from allergies. I can’t find any mention of this in other discussions and articles of filiform warts, so I have no idea whether this is expected behavior, or what it means if it’s not.
Thoughts, opinions? If I can't see a doc until late June or July, how much should I change my behavior about it until then?

This is not my confession, its a copy paste of a real confession
Today I want to come clean about something I feel very badly about. I cannot undo some of the things I have done, but hopefully this message will prevent other such occurrences in the future.
I am a paid basher.
Yes, it is true. Today is my last day at this company; I'm moving on to a new job. I've realized that there are more dignifying jobs out there that can pay me equally as well. But before I go, I want to explain a few things because this just isn't right and I won't feel good about myself until I expose this sham. It's hurt too many people and I don't want it on my conscience anymore. I can no longer live with a lie.
I work for a company called Global Calumny Funds in Stamford, CT. Basically, it's a Boiler Room much like the one in the movie of the same name. The idea behind my group is to bash the price of a company's stock down low enough to where the group of investors who retained our company's services can buy the stock really cheap and perhaps even take it over all together.
There are approximately 70 people at the company divided into several groups. My group, consisting of 5 people, is responsible for IDWD. While I probably shouldn't give any names of anyone working here now, what the heck, I'm leaving here, so what can they do? sue me? Ha! I can tell you that laptoptrader and janice shell were part of my group until he left last week, as was ninaturtle. Others who have been part of this include early bashers like hard data and Investorman. You may be interested to know that some hypsters, such as MONEYMADE and even Datatech!!, have also been part of the scam (more on that later).
There are several companies engaged in the bashing business, ours is not the only one. However, I can tell you that not every basher in here is a paid basher. Having done this for a year, I can usually tell who is a paid basher and who is merely someone having a little fun. While unpaid bashers have a different motive than someone like me, they can be unwilling accomplices to helping me achieve my ultimate goal and they also spread rumor and confusion throughout a room, which also helps me.
What is that goal? Well, I am merely a cog in a much larger machine, so my bosses never really explained the big picture to me, but I'd say essentially, Shaddowwatch2oo3 was right. There are several companies who are quite familiar with Jim Bishop and Janice Shell and who are deathly afraid of them.
There are three types of bashers here at Global Calumny Funds: Advanced, Intermediate and Beginner. An Advanced-level basher (also known as a Silver Tongued Devil) would spread false or misleading information about the company. They would deal in facts, countering every longs post with articles, news reports and opinion surveys that gave a negative impression about the company.
An Intermediate-level basher (also known as a Serpent) would try to weasel their way into the confidence of longs and create doubt using rumor or innuendo.
Finally, a Beginner-level basher (also known as a Pitchfork) would attempt to create confusion in the room by distracting other posters with satire, name calling and pointless arguments. The idea was to make sure no serious discussion of the stock could take place. A Pitchfork was usually a basher, but not always. Sometimes, we would throw in a hypster Pitchfork such as MONEYMADE and laptop and a pumper like Datatech to create the illusion of an argument going on. What was really funny (in a perverse way, I guess) was that Datatech and I sat next to each other, laughing the whole time.
I was a Serpent basher, because I am known for effective bashing based on solid facts and truth. I was paid a base wage of $18 an hour for my services. I was given a $1.25 bonus for every decent quality post over 100 per day as well as a monthly bonus of $100 for every penny the stock had dropped from the previous month. I was also paid a bonus for bashing on weekends. While this may not sound like much, I made a decent, though dishonorable, paycheck plus a nice Laptop with free wireless internet connection.
Each of us sat in a small half-cubicle in a cluster with our teammates. Each group (usually five people) was made of three beginners (two who would bash and one who would hype), one intermediate and one advanced level basher. Occasionally for some of the hotter stocks, one of the beginners would be replaced by an intermediate depending on how much the stock was rising. IDWD was a low-level stock, meaning it got the 3-1-1 configuration.
Honestly though, somehow, I get the feeling that WV Hillbilly may have worked for a basher company or knows someone who does because the fund websites he occasionally posts is eerily similar to our employer's websites. While not exact, I'd say it is about 90 percent the same. We do have certain rules that we follow.
First, we have to develop a character and stay within that character in order to build a "following." My character, "FogOfWar," was a humorous, sarcastic, obnoxious supporter of free speech and loved to portray himself as a truth-telling superhero, but only when it came to bashers.
Next, we had to follow certain guidelines on what we could say. We were urged to have an "answer" to every long's question, but we were to frame that answer in a way that ridiculed the questioner for asking such a question. However, we were never to use profanity or vulgarity because that would cause people to ignore us. We were to make fun of people, but in a civil way. The idea was to get "play," i.e. reaction from other posters. The more play we got, the more the room would be disrupted. Ignored posters get no play. One exception would be the hypsters since they were "defending" the stock against our onslaught, they got a little more leeway. People would side with the hypster because they thought he was real since he appeared to be on their side, but was really on ours, setting us up to disrupt the room. MoneyMade was quite good at this and gets paid very well.
I've worked on IDWD, VLO, AGII, QBID, BKMP for a few months now. In addition to the FogOfWar alias, I've used a few others on several other boards as well. I've used so many aliases that I can not remember the monikers or the passwords. I honestly lost track of everything. I stuck with FogOfWar because it was the one that got the most play from other posters.
In closing, I feel absolutely terrible about this. It's just awful how I've been part of a scam designed to cheat honest, hard-working people out of their investments all for the benefit of a few wealthy people who already have enough money to last a lifetime.
These greedy people MUST be stopped. That's why I'm posting this before I leave. I want to make up for some of the damage I've done. I can't live with this lie anymore. You can't imagine how hard it is to look at myself in the mirror each morning knowing my job is to cheat and lie.
I have to go now, I'm too broken up to continue. I hope this confession can make up for my sordid deeds; I would urge everyone who reads this to inform as many people as you can. Only by shining the light of truth can we drive these rats back into the darkness from whence they came. Believe me, they don't want publicity.
Good luck and I hope all of you the best in your investment endeavors.

Some background for you: I’m going to start by saying I’m 19 and graduated high school last year. I’m diagnosed with autism(just very recently), and then major depression, and generalized anxiety which I’ve had the diagnosis of for years. My dad is out of the picture. I of course struggle from these disorders but also from a toxic relationship with my mom that my therapist says is very codependent. (I want validation while she invalidates, she name calls “you’re acting like a lunatic!” She wants control, doesn’t apologize, etc)
Main topic: I GREATLY CRAVE INDEPENDENCE. I am also scared of it though. And I don’t know how to get it. My goal is to be starting an esthetician track at this beauty school in January when it opens up to the next group of people. Until then though, how can I become more independent? Once I graduate that school/find a job with that certification and have enough money to move out from it, I do want to. But with my disorders it’s definitely hard. Even going to the store is terribly difficult for me. How do I work past this? I was working at Spencer’s for a while and then a coffee shop. I couldn’t handle either. I’ve been on disability the past 3 or so months with getting some mental treatment but I only get $60 a week from that which goes towards my car. Maybe I should try doing stuff like Rover (dog walking app) or Uber eats or something? Jobs in busy crowded spaces are very overwhelming to me. I prefer to be on my own or work with very little people where it’s not loud or chaotic. (I was crying at working every single day) But all around in every aspect how can I work on becoming independent without doing too much too quick when it’s hard with my struggles from these disorders? I know it needs to be a gradual increase and not 0 to 100 but I have some time before January. Any advice appreciated. Thanks

I(21F) ordered from Uber Eats the other day. I've never been one of those people that doesn't tip, I usually always tip at least 15-20% whether that's for delivery or restaurants, etc.
However, the other day I was surprised when my order wasn't at the front of my door. I looked closely at the picture and realized that the driver placed my order in front of a different residence! I was kind of annoyed so I contacted customer support, told them I never received my food, and they issued me a refund only for the order. Then I went back and took away the tip I left the driver. I understand it could have been an honest mistake, but why should I pay them out of my pocket when they didn't do their job correctly?
I was telling my friend about this, and he said that I was terrible for taking away the tip. He elaborated, saying that since I've grown up privileged and never had to work a customer service job that I don't know how hard it is to survive on tips, and that it was a scummy move for me to take it away since I don't know what the driver must be going through. He also pointed out that it was most likely just an honest mistake, because why on Earth would the driver intentionally mess up an order when that's their livelihood?
Listen, I'm well aware that I've had a financially privileged life. And I sympathize with people who are struggling financially. However, I've also worked before, and the bottom line is if you don't do your job correctly, there is a consequence. Like for example, if I clock in late to work then I would take a pay cut. It doesn't matter if it was an honest mistake, there is still the consequence. So logically it makes sense in my head to take away the tip when the driver didn't do the job I paid them to do correctly. I'm also a student so I'm not in a position to be giving away free money to people.
However, a part of me still does feel a little uneasy about it, just because I've quite literally never been one of those people who doesn't tip. This is actually the first time I've not tipped. Part of me felt wrong to go back and remove it. And after my friend's comments, it has got me wondering, AITBA?

Hello!
So, I decided to make a part 2 because my original post ended up being more theory based and stuff, which resulted in it getting to be to similar to F2. I really did not like the story I came up with, especially the ending with Arendelle and Northuldra combining, and Anna and Elsa being representatives of one of the people each. I mean, if you really think about it, how was that even supposed to work at all? How were to completely different people supposed to even coexist in the same town. One was pretty modern, while the other people lived in tents and took care of animals all day.
Anyways, I did have more ideas that did not fit in before because I was trying to figure out what the creators were going for, so here they are. Plus! I also thought of my own Frozen 2 story idea I would love to share!
First Idea! Elsa and her learning not to shut the door!
Now, we all know this is pointless. She learned the lesson in Frozen, and OFA showed she was getting better. I do think there is potential of a sequel fully tackling this bad habit of Elsa's and finally showing she has gotten over it, but it has to be done in a way that does not set her character back to zero. I think maybe having her slip up near the end, which results in something bad happening is a good idea instead. Another thing that needs to happen is that Elsa has to work to make things right afterwards. It cannot be another, "Elsa makes a mistake by pushing Anna away, resulting in something bad happening and Anna having to fix it", kind of story. No, have Elsa see she made a mistake and try to fix it herself. This way it is actually clear that she has learned her lesson. Just like she tried to do in OFA.
Another thing I noticed with Elsa and her habit of pushing people away, is how Anna responds to it. In OFA when Elsa once again slams the door in Anna's face, Anna does not push it. Instead Anna leaves and tries to solve the problem herself by going up to the attic and try and find a tradition for Elsa and her.
I know we all focus on how Elsa tries to do everything herself, but I think Anna has the same problem, just in a different way. She wants to do things together but as soon as she meets resistance or is denied, Anna then just goes at it alone. I am picturing Elsa's coronation where Anna tries to get Elsa to say why the gates cannot just stay open, but Elsa jerks away and shouts it just can't, and Anna leaves. Anna has been rejected all her life, so it makes sense if even know that Elsa has opened up, Anna is still afraid of pushing things to far, just like she ended up doing at the end of Elsa's coronation which resulted in Elsa's powers getting revealed.
Another thing about Elsa and pushing everyone away, it is not just that she tries to do things herself, but also that she just gives up. If something feels hopeless to Elsa, she shuts down. But nothing ever seems hopeless to Anna, so she ends up foolhardily trying to solve it by herself.
So, when it comes to the story, I am imagining Anna and Elsa go on an adventure, but as the movie goes on, Elsa loses more and more faith until she finally gives up. Anna argues with her that they are almost there, but Elsa says enough and walks away. Anna becomes determined and sets out by herself but quickly is in danger. Elsa learns about this and realizes it is because of what she had done, not only giving up, but also not even trying to explain her reasoning to Anna as well. Elsa rushes and she saves Anna. She apologizes to Anna and tells her that she can rely on her more now. Anna in turn also apologizes for rushing into things to much.
And now for my second idea, which has to do with Olaf and Kristoff!
So, in OFA, Olaf, blow up Kristoff's sled. So that means Kristoff is currently unable to do his job. For Kristoff's story, I think he should be working to try and pay for a new sled. Anna tries to insist on paying for a new one, but Kristoff refuses. He does not just want to live off of Anna and Elsa's wealth, and he takes pride in the hard work he does as an ice harvester. So Kristoff gets a job. This I think is a much better thing for Kristoff to do, instead of just trying to propose.
As for Olaf, he has a character ark about responsibility. He feels bad about destroying Kristoff's sled and tries to get a job himself. And he also ends up being the one who tells Elsa that Anna went out on her own. Anna had asked him for help, and then told him not to tell Elsa, which resulted in making Olaf feel torn. On one hand, Anna had asked him not to tell, so he does not want to betray her trust. But on the other hand, he knows that Elsa should be told that Anna ran away. In the end, he realizes it is his responsibility to make sure everyone is safe, and Anna clearly is not safe, so he goes to tell Elsa.
Well that is all the ideas I had, based off of what is set up in OFA.
I do think a sequel should tackle more about Anna and Elsa's traumatic childhood so they can become closer, and that dealing with how their parents raised them is probably the best next option. And I think Anna and Elsa would want to somehow become closer with their subjects.
As for my rewrite idea. I am going to create another post that is dedicated just to it. It is going to be an outline of the story. I have a beginning and a really great ending, with some ideas for the middle, including song suggestions. So look forward to it. Plus, it has nothing to do with F2!
Her is a little bit about what it is going to be about. So, has anyone else been getting all of those North Sea short videos on YouTube or Tick Tock? Showing all those big ships and all the large and dangerous waves? I was watching them, and briefly remembered that Elsa also crossed a sea. That sea was called the Dark Sea, and it was nothing compared to what was being shown of the North Sea. I mean, there were video's of whorl pools, and tornados, humongous waves, and even lightning striking the water. Not to mention the sea is supposed to be very foggy as well. I saw one video where it was just a huge wall of fog, and a ship slowly sailing and disappearing into it. I don't know if that was real or CGI, but it looked so threatening and cool!
So! for my Frozen 2 story, Anna and Elsa are going on a high waters adventure! And what are they doing? They are searching for their parents lost ship!
I think being on a ship surrounded by dangerous waters, would actually keep everyone on an even playing field. Elsa knows she cannot use her powers carelessly, or she might end up damaging the ship. For instance, if a giant wave came crashing towards the ship, Elsa cannot just freeze it, because then it would be like a giant iceberg hitting the ship instead of just water. And even if the ship sank and she froze the entire ocean, then what? She would be stranded in the middle of the ocean and would have to walk to land, which would be miles and miles away.
Kristoff would probably be a big help to the crew. He is big and really strong, not to mention is used to cold weather and risking his life for his job, so he adjusts to being on a ship really quickly.
And Anna has been shown to be really nimble and can climb anything, so she ends up helping a lot as well.
The main conflict is going to be with the ships captain. He feels like the journey is pointless as there is no guaranty they can even find Agnarr and Iduna's ship. Plus he has sailed these seas for years and knows how dangerous they are, so taking the queen and princess on this journey is something he really does not want to do. He is constantly butting heads with Elsa, especially in authority, because even if she is queen, this is his ship and his crew. Elsa in turn is also struggling with her confidence in this journey. She starts of strong and really wanting to find her parents ship, but as the waters become more dangerous, Elsa's hope of reaching the end dwindles as well. Anna on the other hand truly believes they will find their parents ship. And finally, Kristoff, who has gotten a job on this ship is trying to keep the peace. He knows how much this journey means to Anna and Elsa, but he also does not want them to get hurt, and he also does not want to lose the job he finally managed to get.
Well, that is all I will say. What do you think? What should I call it? Definitely not Frozen 2. I was thinking Journey of the Frozen Sea, or The Frozen North Sea.

Edit for info: i am 21 he his 23, met in 2021, been dating for a year. Fwb before that.
I might sound a little unhinged, but i guess I’m wanting to know if I’m in the wrong for wanting to bring it up to talk about it.
This morning, my boyfriend got a barrage of voice memos from a friend he hadn’t talked to in a while. From my understanding she’s a lesbian, but she seemed to have just gone through a breakup.
He played them out loud, it was probably 5 solid minutes of her talking, saying she wants to make music with him, and go to a festival together this summer. She also called him handsome within a string of compliments and she said that she loves him. She’s a very hippie, rave, spiritual kind of person. My boyfriend is more on the fringe of that ideology, and so am I. So the statements of love seemed like a very “we’ve been friends for so long, we used to do shrooms and have those experiences together” thing. (My bf does not use psychedelics anymore)
He despises responding to people, he seems to feel like he has to perform when doing so. So he was dreading responding to her 5 minutes of manic ramblings. He probably wrote for a solid 20-30 minutes. He showed me the bulk of text, not close enough for me to read it. It was multiple paragraphs. He made a joke about how he tried to match her energy, and use the hippie vernacular from his past. I told him half-jokingly i want to hear it, initially because i was curious to hear his attempt at a spiritual vibe. He dismissed it and acted kind of weird, he mentioned he didn’t want me to hearead it because or her saying she loved him and him trying to match that energy.
I dropped it at that because deep down i trust him, we had problems years ago before we were exclusively dating and he has made incredible efforts to make it known that he is devoted to me. I have a lot of anxiety about it, and he knows that. He has told me every time he has communicated with exes usually a “hey, we were dicks to each other, no hard feelings cool bye” or a “stop contacting me” i also know he’s not physically doing anything wrong, we are together every weekend, and he texts me incredibly frequently, we also have each other’s location. He is a home body who will go out once a month with one of his best freinds and thats it. Even then he texts me cute little pictures of him or drunk shenanigans (usually videos of him climbing trees lol)
But now that im home, i feel like theres a reason he didnt want me to read the texts, i thought she was a lesbian but in her voice memo she said her partner, which is what my boyfriend calls me since im nonbinary, but i know from experience he was quite the man hoe when we met.
I keep imagining senarios where he had a thing with her and was being a little too comfortable in the texts, or since he put in a lot of effort to match her energy that it was some sort of proclimation about how amazing she is and “YES! We should totaly hang out, you beautiful being” when he doesnt really treat me with that kind of adoration.
I want to bring it up, that im anxious about it, and i feel like our relationship has been so incredibly open that this is out of character. We pick our noses in front of each other, we’ve talked about trauma we’ve never told anyone about before, he’s shit his pants in front of me, theres nothing too intence or embarrassing for us.
Why did he not want me to read it?
Sorry for grammaspelling/punctuation, my phone overheats when i type too long so its hard to edit.

When I was but a sprout of a potato I had a miserable teacher. We'll call her Mrs. B. I was in the first grade and around seven years old.
One day Mrs. B finishes up her lesson earlier than she anticipated and she needed to fill time until recess. So she hands out paper to each of us and instructs the class to draw a picture of the two people we love the best. Once we finish we have to have her check it off before we could go out to recess.
Context: My parents were never married and young when they had me. Recently, I had been trying to get them back together. In my little seven year old mind I thought this picture would be it. If I drew a picture that showed them how much I loved them they, in turn, would realize they love each other and we could be a family.
Excitedly, I get my chunky crayons out and proceed to draw and color as carefully as I can. It has to be perfect.
I wanted to put them in a field of flowers, but my flower skills were limited. Tulips and sunflowers. That was it and they were NOT good enough. Then I came up with the best idea. Heart. Shaped. Flowers. Pink and red ones. As many as I can fit. By the time I finished, recess had already started and I was the only one left in the classroom.
I sign my name on the back, put away my crayons, and walk up to get my smiley face stamp from Mrs. B. I'm so proud and cannot wait to show my picture to my mom and dad.
Mrs. B looks over my picture, turns to me and stone cold says, "there's no such thing as heart shaped flowers." She proceeds to rip my picture in half, right down the middle, and THROWS IT IN THE TRASH!! Mrs. B hands me a new piece of paper and says I can't go out to recess until I draw a new picture.
I am shocked. The kind of shock where you don't know what to say or do. I'm not even heartbroken yet. Meekly, I take the paper, sit at my desk and just stare at the blank paper.
Mind you, the only rule Mrs. B gave was to draw a picture of the two people we loved. No other requirements, no other instructions.
As I'm realizing that I didn't break any rules or do anything wrong I get pissed. It was like a fire was lit inside of me. This was completely unjustified and I was not about to allow that to happen.
I grab my black crayon and scribble a big black circle in the middle of the paper. I take out all of my anger scribbling as hard as I can. Making it as dark and angry as I felt.
Once I felt better, I calmly put my crayons away, walked over to Mrs. B's desk and SLAMMED that paper onto her desk. Before she has a chance to say anything I litterally skipped out the classroom door and down the hall to enjoy my recess.

Dear D
It's been 2 weeks since you broke up with me. 2 weeks since you told me you didn't feel like you could be in a relationship anymore. 2 weeks since my world crashed down around me. 2 weeks since the hole appeared in my chest.
You said you felt like you were toxic in our relationship. I wish you had talked to me about it before deciding. You said I didn't want to be around your kids. But I was picturing school dances and graduations and being there for them. You said that you felt it was all because of your childhood trauma. Yet you never wanted to discuss it with me. Yes I didn't push the issue when you would get close and I noticed you shut down I just wanted you to be comfortable.
In these two weeks you have isolated me from you. The one I love more than anything I've experienced in life shut me out as if I was a stranger. It's not no contact because you've still responded at times but the coldness is palpable from the messages.
I watched video of us returning from our date night captured by the security cameras The smile on your face felt genuine. The way you pulled me in for a kiss and kissed me so passionately. Did you know at that time that that would be the last time you would kiss me? Or did you figure it out when you went to hang out with your friends afterwards.
I've been looking online and so many of these posts hit close enough to home that I wonder if they are you reaching out to me. But then I notice that they're not. I just want to have a real conversation with you. Not one where you shut me out and mask up so that way I can't see your emotions.
My biggest wish is that you're willing to talk to me and we can work on repairing our relationship. Near two years all gone in 1 hour 2 weeks ago.
My therapist says that I need to contact you and give you your stuff from the house back but I don't want to. To me that feels like admitting that we will never be back together. Even now as I have your stuff in a box it bothers me that it's not in its rightful place waiting for you to come use it.
My second biggest wish after being able to talk would be that we could get back together.
How is it you could say you still love me, that it's hard for you to text me because all you want to do is flirt, that seeing me miserable makes you miserable. Those are not things said by somebody who no longer loves you.
I know there is little to no chance you are here posting things. I know there is little to no chance You're going to see this message. But just know no matter what I am here for you. I love you Amore.
A

He is a friend… He’s kind. He’s respectful. He is gentle. He’s soft with his words. He makes me feel safe and warm. He likes to have fun. He likes to travel. He loves his parents. He loves his family. I think he’s everything I want in someone. Minus the quiet and shy part but he’s definitely opening up in a fun and exciting way.. I met him through my sister and BIL. And we have been friends for 2 years now. They had originally wanted to introduce me to this guy but I said I wasn’t interested in getting to know anyone and from what they told me I had a hunch he would be someone who liked really pretty skinny slim petite girls. I wasn’t that. So they just introduced me to their whole friend group and we all just became friends. Our friends would casually joke about us being together when we all hung out as a group. Or if both of us were busy and couldn’t hang out with them at the same time they’d joke that we were secretly on a date etc. He never said much and just took it. I would brush it off as well not much thinking much of it since we were the only two singles ones… but There were times when I couldn’t tell if he was just being nice or if it was him showing me signs. But the more we all hung out the more I got to see what kind of person he was. I remember admitting to my BIL that I was kind of interested in getting to know him more now but I was really drunk when we had that convo and never brought it up again when I was sober cause I was embarrassed. He was supportive though and said I was a really good person and he thought we matched really well. The first time I admitted to myself that I probably really liked him, I was really hurt. i never confessed to him or anything like that but i just came to a realization… It took me so many years to finally love myself and appreciate every stage of who I am where I am and what I look like… but I realized I must have really really liked this guy cause I tried so hard to change who I was to see if he would like me or give me a sign. I tried working out to become skinny and I went out of my way to always hangout with this friend group. Our friend group was scheduled to go on a trip together. I told myself I’d see how the trip goes and really feel him out to see if he was interested… I thought I mentally prepared myself well enough but I guess I didn’t. On this trip I had mentioned a different girl friend that I wanted to meet up with with our friend group. I don’t remember how we got into this convo but I ended up showing him a picture and his face lit up. She’s a really beautiful girl who’s fit. He wanted to meet her too. So the next day my friend group met up with my other girl friend and her friend. This girl friend of mine knew about my lole for this guy so she was never interested.. I could instantly tell the shift in his body language. Keep in mind he’s a really quiet and reserved guy. But I could see the way he would watch out for her. Like her bottle fell and from across the friend group he told her she dropped her bottle. Little shifts like that in his attitude that made me realize what he was like if he was interested in someone… any way fast forward we started walking around and at one point my girl friend’s friend(who I just met that day as well) randomly asked him if he liked me. I was right in front of them. But I heard. With no hesitation in his voice he said no she’s like my sister… my heart fell to my stomach… the first time in 6+ years after my last relationship that I was allowing myself to like someone again and I got sister-zoned… if I’m being honest it really hurt my self esteem. I worked so hard to really love myself and I felt like I was a good person who was funny and kind and selfless and giving and family oriented(I’m not just trying to boost my ego lol almost all the people In my life has said these to me before) but the first person I allow myself to like in so long has no interest in me. All the little clues I got were stories I made up in my head. I prided myself on being good at reading people.. but it was really all in my head… anyway I just pretended like I didn’t hear anything and continued with where I was going. I realized then that he was just nice to me not interested in me. After that trip he started talking more to the friend group about the girls he had asked out on dates and the kind of girls he liked and how his dates went. Then I really realized I prob was just like a sister to him. And he’s was just like any other guy.. the ones who likes pretty skinny girls. He would talk to girls that weren’t the best people but they were really pretty and skinny. After that I tried to stop myself from continuing to like him so I distanced myself from the friend group. Just a little bit. But I also started a new job so that also prevented me from seeing them too often. I noticed myself think about him less and being less effected by his dating life. I felt good again. Just really focused on myself and reminded myself to stay true to who I am so I can attract my person to me. But just this past weekend… we went on a trip together again. I really thought I was good! He really has just been feeling like a friend. But this trip was only my sister and BIL and him and I. Everything seems to be going great I played wing woman for him and helped him meet girls! But I think I realize.. I really do like him. Like I like him probably a lot more than I thought. Yes I played his wing woman and I wasn’t very jealous or anything like that.. I know i was hella cute on this trip and I know I’m a good person. But the whole time I when he was talking to girls.. I didn’t wish to be them.. I just wished he’d see me. I introduced those girls to him to see if he would choose me.. even with a married girl with 3 kids who says she’s in an open relationship and who is older than him he didn’t choose me. We got into a deep conversation about his last super toxic relationship and about the kind of woman he wants. He named everything I am(traits about myself that others have said about me not just what I think about myself). I kept listening and realized the only thing that prob would make me not fit to be his ideal woman is because I’m a bigger girl. Anyway I guess moral of the story is that I just really like this guy who prob doesn’t see me anymore than a sister. And I can’t help it that I’m not the one he’s unwilling to choose. I just have to stay true to who I am. And I will naturally attract my person to me.
Also I don’t think I am delusional and obsessive. I have kept a good distance and I have never crossed any boundaries of friendship. I just had a lot of people we know question why we weren’t together and many people always said they thought we are a good match.. but I’m just not the one he is choosing to have. And maybe it’s time I accept that.
What do you guys think? Idk what kind of validation or answers I’m looking for I think I just want to share my pain and heartbreak as 28 year old who will prob stay single Forever because this one sided like was Kind of painful. lol

Dear D
It's been 2 weeks since you broke up with me. 2 weeks since you told me you didn't feel like you could be in a relationship anymore. 2 weeks since my world crashed down around me. 2 weeks since the hole appeared in my chest.
You said you felt like you were toxic in our relationship. I wish you had talked to me about it before deciding. You said I didn't want to be around your kids. But I was picturing school dances and graduations and being there for them. You said that you felt it was all because of your childhood trauma. Yet you never wanted to discuss it with me. Yes I didn't push the issue when you would get close and I noticed you shut down I just wanted you to be comfortable.
In these two weeks you have isolated me from you. The one I love more than anything I've experienced in life shut me out as if I was a stranger. It's not no contact because you've still responded at times but the coldness is palpable from the messages.
I watched video of us returning from our date night captured by the security cameras The smile on your face felt genuine. The way you pulled me in for a kiss and kissed me so passionately. Did you know at that time that that would be the last time you would kiss me? Or did you figure it out when you went to hang out with your friends afterwards.
I've been looking online and so many of these posts hit close enough to home that I wonder if they are you reaching out to me. But then I notice that they're not. I just want to have a real conversation with you. Not one where you shut me out and mask up so that way I can't see your emotions.
My biggest wish is that you're willing to talk to me and we can work on repairing our relationship. Near two years all gone in 1 hour 2 weeks ago.
My therapist says that I need to contact you and give you your stuff from the house back but I don't want to. To me that feels like admitting that we will never be back together. Even now as I have your stuff in a box it bothers me that it's not in its rightful place waiting for you to come use it.
My second biggest wish after being able to talk would be that we could get back together.
How is it you could say you still love me, that it's hard for you to text me because all you want to do is flirt, that seeing me miserable makes you miserable. Those are not things said by somebody who no longer loves you.
I know there is little to no chance you are here posting things. I know there is little to no chance You're going to see this message. But just know no matter what I am here for you. I love you Amore.
A

I searched and could not find anything so I'm posting the question. I (34M) broke off my engagement with my fiance (41F) last June and we lived together until she could recover financially and she moved out in April.
Although I told her she needed to wait to sign papers for vendors for our wedding, she went ahead signed them anyway. So when I broke things off, she asked me to reimburse her for the deposits. She told me it was $4,500 and I agreed. After I started paying her back for the deposits she said $4,500 was the deposits but since she was moving out she would feel more comfortable with a little more for expenses so she told me $8,000 and I told her that I wasn't going to commit financial suicide but I will do whatever extra that I can.
We've been "trying to work things out" since she "had an epiphany" when she moved out that I did love her and that maybe she was focused on the wrong things and she'd like to work towards getting our family back together. So I've been slowly letting her back in but still holding boundaries in place.
Her sister had an event for May birthdays out of town and she asked me to attend and I chose to go. While in transit, she asked me to place an order for a bunch of things and I made the remark that she was ordering a lot and she was going to have to take it off her child support. She responded "potentially how much was it costing" then she pivoted to "when can I expect a payment this month". I asked if she was expecting me to send her a full payment and she said I could deduct the expenses from this weekend. And I made a comment that "you're about to make me compare you to someone you don't like" (my oldest son's mother that I pay state mandated child support to). I knew this was going to cause a problem but I needed her to understand how things were coming across.
Fast-forward to today and things blew up (which I should've expected). She brought the conversation back up and I told her how I felt about the situation. I don't feel it's ok for me to use funds on us, her, the child(ren) and still expect a full payment. She didn't understand why I felt it was a problem. She said "she just needed to know and if I didn't have the funds, just let her know". "She understands I just got my car fixed, or anything could've happened. Either way, I should give her the heads up". She also said that it feels like I "just don't believe in child support", and she went on to acknowledge that our son spends equal if not more time with me.
Background: She didn't want to move in before we were married. She lived about an hour away but ended up forced to move in due to a natural disaster that ruined her apartment. This lead to a lot of resentment plus other issues along the way. I wasn't perfect myself I admit, but I was also the first non abusive and somewhat decent relationship that she's had. This was our second time dating (6 years) and the first time we dated a year then she ghosted me. We loved together for 3 years and she was never required to pay bills nor did she have to put groceries in the kitchen except a handful of times. I ended up with financial hardship and even through therapy things were up and down but I was never fully able to get over the resentment. There was an incident on the 4th of July that finally made me say I was done.
More background: she has a (13f) daughter and we have a (3m) son. Both of the kids are mentally mine as the daughters father is not really in the picture. Our son was born with a congenital heart defect which led to speech delays (known issue). I take him to speech therapy in the morning then he spends the rest of the day with me. He used to go to daycare after school/speech but we're preparing for his next heart surgery so we took him out due to germ ridden daycares are (if you know, you know). Mom works in the office 3 days a week and from home 2 days a week. I'm self employed and work from home. I usually do the volunteering and chauffeuring the kids around, etc.
Let me know if there's more information needed.

Dear D
It's been 2 weeks since you broke up with me. 2 weeks since you told me you didn't feel like you could be in a relationship anymore. 2 weeks since my world crashed down around me. 2 weeks since the hole appeared in my chest.
You said you felt like you were toxic in our relationship. I wish you had talked to me about it before deciding. You said I didn't want to be around your kids. But I was picturing school dances and graduations and being there for them. You said that you felt it was all because of your childhood trauma. Yet you never wanted to discuss it with me. Yes I didn't push the issue when you would get close and I noticed you shut down I just wanted you to be comfortable.
In these two weeks you have isolated me from you. The one I love more than anything I've experienced in life shut me out as if I was a stranger. It's not no contact because you've still responded at times but the coldness is palpable from the messages.
I watched video of us returning from our date night captured by the security cameras The smile on your face felt genuine. The way you pulled me in for a kiss and kissed me so passionately. Did you know at that time that that would be the last time you would kiss me? Or did you figure it out when you went to hang out with your friends afterwards.
I've been looking online and so many of these posts hit close enough to home that I wonder if they are you reaching out to me. But then I notice that they're not. I just want to have a real conversation with you. Not one where you shut me out and mask up so that way I can't see your emotions.
My biggest wish is that you're willing to talk to me and we can work on repairing our relationship. Near two years all gone in 1 hour 2 weeks ago.
My therapist says that I need to contact you and give you your stuff from the house back but I don't want to. To me that feels like admitting that we will never be back together. Even now as I have your stuff in a box it bothers me that it's not in its rightful place waiting for you to come use it.
My second biggest wish after being able to talk would be that we could get back together.
How is it you could say you still love me, that it's hard for you to text me because all you want to do is flirt, that seeing me miserable makes you miserable. Those are not things said by somebody who no longer loves you.
I know there is little to no chance you are here posting things. I know there is little to no chance You're going to see this message. But just know no matter what I am here for you. I love you Amore.
A