Food calorie fat counter
1500 kCals A Day!
2015.03.10 22:08 THUMB5UP 1500 kCals A Day!
A sub about eating on 1500 calories total per day.
2013.01.12 00:16 stupidrobots Getting hammered while getting slim
A subreddit devoted to the careful craft of the low-carb drunk. Too many sugary cocktails and carb-laden beer finding their way to your gut, ass, and thighs? We've got the cure for you! Self promotion of any non-alcohol related keto products is considered SPAM On this sub and you will be banned without further question.
2012.01.22 21:51 roo-bob Protein Sparing Modified Fasting
All things relating to Protein Sparing Modified Fasting (PSMF) PSMF is a low calorie diet that promotes rapid weight loss while preserving lean body mass (muscle). It involves eating mostly protein-rich foods and minimizing the intake of carbohydrates and fats. It is designed to jump start a weight loss program for rapid fat loss or to break a stall.
2024.05.22 00:21 RockMo-DZine few months later, after incredible agony, GB diet
not posted here for weeks. after GB diagnosis, also diagnosed with Prostate Cancer - a new learning curve, but wanted to follow up because GB is still an issue for me, and diet is so important.
have 1.8 inch GS, & many smaller ones, but no attacks in over 5 months. Dr's recco's surgery, which I'm resisting, esp since diet has really helped.
imho, biggest problem with GB attacks (not the underlying issue, which still exists) is consuming too much fat & processed sugars. on the downside, it means no more eating out, & no more friends & family cooked food.
for first few weeks, nixed all fats - basically half apple, half banana, oats & trivial protein per day. noticed hair felt wiry, skin felt rough, constipated every day. one does need fats.
started re-cooking chicken - but had to drain all the run off fats (which I normally think of as stock) & discard it. then add water, again drain & discard. once cooked, added lots of broccoli, cauli, spinach, other veg, - which do contain a different type of fat.
can now cook & consume beef - top round, eye of round, any of the low fat cuts. again, drain & dump the juices (which is really sad - all that yummy gravy).
desserts are apple slices or banana - maybe with some apple sauce & no fat Greek yogurt.
bottom line is that 6 mo ago, I was on the verge of hitting the ER, and agreeing to anything to stop the pain. I'm now 40/50lbs lighter & almost slim again.
At this time, I'm of the opinion that I can still live with this without surgery, as long as I'm very careful.
One still has to be cautious & I can feel an impending issue if I get too cocky with fat & sugar intake, but for now it's manageable.
good luck to all.
submitted by RockMo-DZine to gallbladders [link] [comments]
have 1.8 inch GS, & many smaller ones, but no attacks in over 5 months. Dr's recco's surgery, which I'm resisting, esp since diet has really helped.
imho, biggest problem with GB attacks (not the underlying issue, which still exists) is consuming too much fat & processed sugars. on the downside, it means no more eating out, & no more friends & family cooked food.
for first few weeks, nixed all fats - basically half apple, half banana, oats & trivial protein per day. noticed hair felt wiry, skin felt rough, constipated every day. one does need fats.
started re-cooking chicken - but had to drain all the run off fats (which I normally think of as stock) & discard it. then add water, again drain & discard. once cooked, added lots of broccoli, cauli, spinach, other veg, - which do contain a different type of fat.
can now cook & consume beef - top round, eye of round, any of the low fat cuts. again, drain & dump the juices (which is really sad - all that yummy gravy).
desserts are apple slices or banana - maybe with some apple sauce & no fat Greek yogurt.
bottom line is that 6 mo ago, I was on the verge of hitting the ER, and agreeing to anything to stop the pain. I'm now 40/50lbs lighter & almost slim again.
At this time, I'm of the opinion that I can still live with this without surgery, as long as I'm very careful.
One still has to be cautious & I can feel an impending issue if I get too cocky with fat & sugar intake, but for now it's manageable.
good luck to all.
2024.05.22 00:14 icecreamraider Part 1.5 - On Killing and Morality in War
On Killing and Morality in War.
I promised a follow-up to my yesterday’s post on more technical aspects of planning and executing a ground invasion. It’s coming – already started writing it… may or may not have time to finish it today.
For more context (and an “about me”) see the original post here: https://www.reddit.com/IsraelPalestine/comments/1cwvbna/the_realities_of_war_lets_kill_some_sacred_cows/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
I’d like to start with a sidebar: a “personal message of sorts.” First, I appreciate all the supportive comments. Of course, there were a few with reading comprehension problems who took an issue with the concept that war can be quite a fun and exhilarating experience (despite the clear “do not recommend” theme throughout). I didn’t plan on writing this post, but felt prompted by some of the comments.
I see a lot of “moralizing” from certain characters who are convinced of their moral superiority and truly believe themselves to be the arbiters of human character.
Side Note: there are also plenty of decent, well-meaning folks who may disagree with one position or another… but do so from a thoughtful place, taking time to consider a counter-point. Nothing but respect to those. Freedom of disagreement is one of the liberties I value highly (a luxury people who live in Islamist enclaves don’t get). Regardless – nothing but respect to y’all. The world is a complicated place and many of your points I find valid, even if our conclusions may differ.
For the “wow… rape must also be fun for you… and murdering 12 million children” crowd”, I’d like to say the following: You, my friends, are among the most dangerous societal types, historically speaking. Seemingly intellectual, but lacking facts, context, and nuance – yet fully convinced of your moral and intellectual superiority. First of – congrats on being born in a place where being a moralizing peacenik is a viable option in life. Second – your “morals” just so happen to reflect the modern western moral code you were born into (and which you’ve done nothing yourself for to achieve). But, in other places, moralizing puritans like you keep the same character, but embrace a different set of “norms and morals”. In other words – a typical Islamist imam doesn’t sound much different than you in tone and conviction… his “holy book” just so happens to be Quaran rather than the ramblings of Norm Finklestein. And, of course, we’ve seen what tends to happen in other places where “anti-capitalist” and “anti-colonialist” moral puritans take hold – I was born at such a place. Let’s just say that the road from “I’m for the oppressed and anti-oppressors” to “we need to murder the reactionaries” is very short and easily crossed. And it’s always the most “righteously-outraged” who cross it first.
Anyways, back to topic of the post.
On Killing and Morality – Does Modern Combat Look like a “video game”?
I saw a comment or two that modern combat is too impersonal, looks like a video game, that it’s too easy for soldiers to kill innocents, etc., etc. I’ve also heard a similar argument from others, in unrelated circumstances.
To anyone thinking that – no, my friends. Killing people isn’t made easier by more lethal and remote weapons. I understand why it may seem that way. But, in many ways, it’s quite the opposite.
1. Military is just a mirror of its society. A military is a perfect representation of a society at large. Some soldiers will indeed be natural-born psychopaths who enjoy killing. But that’s a very tiny number – not any larger than in general population.
2. Bravado is Fake. Most younger soldiers will display a lot of bravado initially – pretend like violence doesn’t bother them (that’s why the military tries really hard to condition new recruits by trivializing the idea of “killing” – but it’s never successful).
3. The Reality. The truth is – killing shocks most soldiers to their core, no matter how much they try to suppress it and put on a brave war fighter face.
Anyhow… I bet I’ll soon hear from the peaceniks who’ll tell me that they’d never do that, that they’d be conscious objectors, etc… To them, I’d like to ask that while you take a break from fellating yourself, don’t forget to thank the guys and the girls who do the dirty jobs so you don’t have to
And… while at it, don’t forget to apologize to the next generation of Arab girls who will be sold into a “marriage” to some fat, old toothless f*ck because some fat, comfortable hippie with an ivy league diploma believes that child rape is just an indigenous form of cultural expression and our interference with it is “colonialism”.
All for now. Peace, everybody. I'll be back with the promised post on "how to invade a place if you must".
submitted by icecreamraider to IsraelPalestine [link] [comments]
I promised a follow-up to my yesterday’s post on more technical aspects of planning and executing a ground invasion. It’s coming – already started writing it… may or may not have time to finish it today.
For more context (and an “about me”) see the original post here: https://www.reddit.com/IsraelPalestine/comments/1cwvbna/the_realities_of_war_lets_kill_some_sacred_cows/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
I’d like to start with a sidebar: a “personal message of sorts.” First, I appreciate all the supportive comments. Of course, there were a few with reading comprehension problems who took an issue with the concept that war can be quite a fun and exhilarating experience (despite the clear “do not recommend” theme throughout). I didn’t plan on writing this post, but felt prompted by some of the comments.
I see a lot of “moralizing” from certain characters who are convinced of their moral superiority and truly believe themselves to be the arbiters of human character.
Side Note: there are also plenty of decent, well-meaning folks who may disagree with one position or another… but do so from a thoughtful place, taking time to consider a counter-point. Nothing but respect to those. Freedom of disagreement is one of the liberties I value highly (a luxury people who live in Islamist enclaves don’t get). Regardless – nothing but respect to y’all. The world is a complicated place and many of your points I find valid, even if our conclusions may differ.
For the “wow… rape must also be fun for you… and murdering 12 million children” crowd”, I’d like to say the following: You, my friends, are among the most dangerous societal types, historically speaking. Seemingly intellectual, but lacking facts, context, and nuance – yet fully convinced of your moral and intellectual superiority. First of – congrats on being born in a place where being a moralizing peacenik is a viable option in life. Second – your “morals” just so happen to reflect the modern western moral code you were born into (and which you’ve done nothing yourself for to achieve). But, in other places, moralizing puritans like you keep the same character, but embrace a different set of “norms and morals”. In other words – a typical Islamist imam doesn’t sound much different than you in tone and conviction… his “holy book” just so happens to be Quaran rather than the ramblings of Norm Finklestein. And, of course, we’ve seen what tends to happen in other places where “anti-capitalist” and “anti-colonialist” moral puritans take hold – I was born at such a place. Let’s just say that the road from “I’m for the oppressed and anti-oppressors” to “we need to murder the reactionaries” is very short and easily crossed. And it’s always the most “righteously-outraged” who cross it first.
Anyways, back to topic of the post.
On Killing and Morality – Does Modern Combat Look like a “video game”?
I saw a comment or two that modern combat is too impersonal, looks like a video game, that it’s too easy for soldiers to kill innocents, etc., etc. I’ve also heard a similar argument from others, in unrelated circumstances.
To anyone thinking that – no, my friends. Killing people isn’t made easier by more lethal and remote weapons. I understand why it may seem that way. But, in many ways, it’s quite the opposite.
1. Military is just a mirror of its society. A military is a perfect representation of a society at large. Some soldiers will indeed be natural-born psychopaths who enjoy killing. But that’s a very tiny number – not any larger than in general population.
2. Bravado is Fake. Most younger soldiers will display a lot of bravado initially – pretend like violence doesn’t bother them (that’s why the military tries really hard to condition new recruits by trivializing the idea of “killing” – but it’s never successful).
3. The Reality. The truth is – killing shocks most soldiers to their core, no matter how much they try to suppress it and put on a brave war fighter face.
- To new troops, my demand was simple – in your first contact, get down, don’t get in the way, and just live to see another day.
- For many, it takes more than one contact to come to their senses and to even start pulling the trigger. There is a natural mental block that stops humans from wanting to kill another human and it’s not overcome easily.
- I’ve seen plenty young kids (and yes, a 19-year old trooper is still a kid) beg and plead certain “characters” we’ve encountered to just be reasonable… raising their weapon in the air to demonstrate they don’t mean harm (very ill advised). Despite months of training, their first instinct was “please, I really don’t want to harm you… please don’t make me to.” That’s the true nature of most young western men and women – including those in uniforms and carrying weapons.
- The first source of anger is “I can’t believe this a-hole just tried to kill me”. But then the longer-lasting source of anger sets in. And that one is: “I can’t believe that a-hole made me kill him”. There is a big difference between the two emotions. And the second one lasts much longer.
- The older, more experienced troops and commanders are more used to the realities of the battlefield… which brings me to the next point...
- Drone pilots have among the highest rates of PTSD. There is nothing easy about dropping a bomb on a human being from the safety of a trailer in the desert and then going home to eat dinner with your family. It’s a f’ed-up thing to ask a man (or a woman) to do. There is nothing easy about going home that day. And it f-cks with your brain permanently. I don’t envy those guys one bit. Though I can imagine that dropping a bomb on a clear hostile target is very satisfying. But the emotion is the same as the above – not anger at the target itself but because you wouldn’t be doing this sh*t if it wasn’t for them.
- The enemy hates me and want my family dead (spare me the “colonialism” lecture please)
- The enemy launched tens of thousands of rockets at us. We tried to hide behind our Iron Dome and the big wall. But that failed (a defensive posture always gets breached eventually, btw).
- The enemy invaded and killed my people. And they plan on doing it as much as they can.
- The enemy isn’t some obscure “group” – it’s a clearly defined target… the ruling, paramilitary organization at this place called Gaza (again, spare me the lecture whether it’s a country of a “concentration camp”. From a soldier’s point of view – it makes no difference).
- We can no longer live next to this enemy. And now, it’s a binary choice – go find the enemy and kill him or he will eventually come back for you.
- The rest of it… the history, the politics of it, the various grievances… hopefully we can sort it out after the fact.
Anyhow… I bet I’ll soon hear from the peaceniks who’ll tell me that they’d never do that, that they’d be conscious objectors, etc… To them, I’d like to ask that while you take a break from fellating yourself, don’t forget to thank the guys and the girls who do the dirty jobs so you don’t have to
And… while at it, don’t forget to apologize to the next generation of Arab girls who will be sold into a “marriage” to some fat, old toothless f*ck because some fat, comfortable hippie with an ivy league diploma believes that child rape is just an indigenous form of cultural expression and our interference with it is “colonialism”.
All for now. Peace, everybody. I'll be back with the promised post on "how to invade a place if you must".
2024.05.22 00:12 Hektagonlive The best cure for herpes is self love.
I know this might sound cliche but after reading some posts in the forum I wanted to share some of my thoughts.
I feel that when we are affected by Herpes and the social stigma that comes with it. We must remember that we are worthy of being loved not just from others, but most importantly to ourselves.
We tend to get outbreaks when we get stressed out and I feel that we need to listen to our bodies; specially when our immune systems are low and take care of ourselves by getting enough sleep, eating healthy food, exercising.
We are worth it, and herpes does not change that… because ultimately we must love ourselves fully and we need to tend to our hurt first and be really kind to ourselves. We are loveable people with dreams and goals and herpes does not change that.
For those of you that have been recently diagnosed and are going through the motions, please be kind to yourselves and be there for yourselves first and foremost. Be extra kind. And don’t be too hard or blame yourselves for the diagnosis. Things do get better even if you don’t see it right now.
Just be gentle with yourselves. And learn what the triggers are and try to eliminate some of them from your life… for me was smoking, drinking alcohol and lack of sleep so I had to make some adjustments. I also eat really healthy now, low fat diet and fresh non processed foods.
submitted by Hektagonlive to HSVpositive [link] [comments]
I feel that when we are affected by Herpes and the social stigma that comes with it. We must remember that we are worthy of being loved not just from others, but most importantly to ourselves.
We tend to get outbreaks when we get stressed out and I feel that we need to listen to our bodies; specially when our immune systems are low and take care of ourselves by getting enough sleep, eating healthy food, exercising.
We are worth it, and herpes does not change that… because ultimately we must love ourselves fully and we need to tend to our hurt first and be really kind to ourselves. We are loveable people with dreams and goals and herpes does not change that.
For those of you that have been recently diagnosed and are going through the motions, please be kind to yourselves and be there for yourselves first and foremost. Be extra kind. And don’t be too hard or blame yourselves for the diagnosis. Things do get better even if you don’t see it right now.
Just be gentle with yourselves. And learn what the triggers are and try to eliminate some of them from your life… for me was smoking, drinking alcohol and lack of sleep so I had to make some adjustments. I also eat really healthy now, low fat diet and fresh non processed foods.
2024.05.22 00:08 DirtyConsole64 Great News! Titans and Tyrants is now on the Tabletop Simulator Steam Workshop!
Finally, drafts, booster box openings, not having to place counters for food and adrenaline... If only I could quickly and easily expand my skillset to coding to automate the cards and counters. In any case, thank you to those that were waiting for this! Go pick it up and join the Discord if you're not there already!
Titans and Tyrants Alpha Set Package - Steam Workshop
Titans and Tyrants Discord Server
submitted by DirtyConsole64 to titansandtyrants [link] [comments]
Titans and Tyrants Alpha Set Package - Steam Workshop
Titans and Tyrants Discord Server
2024.05.22 00:06 chihuahua_vampire Oh feeling fat is all in my head you say? And being "overweight" is also in my head? Good one mate.
I feel like an outcast. Want to know why? Most people with ED are usually routed from body dysmorphia. So to everyone else they look beautiful but to themselves they look "fat".
I thought this was the case for me until reality struck in. My whole life I was told "you're overreacting" and "you're normal it is dysmorphia" and "you don't need to lose weight".
Well if that's true tell me why one of my doctors said I am overweight and need to lose weight. I am supposed to be 130lbs but I am 148lbs , and no this is not what I told myself, this is what my doctor told me. I haven't been that weight since I was 12. TWELVE!! And to hear it come from a medical professional hurt and that triggered my ED in the first place when I was 13. In my head I would tell myself, "this isn't in your head, this is reality, you need to lose weight" and it ruined me. When people told me I was just experiencing "body dysmorphia" I didn't believe them. Because I knew what my "reality" was.
Over the years I realised that reaching that weight was not possible, no matter what I did. I began to feel comfortable in my own skin at my current weight. I was happy, I was enjoying food and I was confident in myself. Until one day we went to see this new doctor. He was specifically for weight loss. The word he used to describe me honestly broke my heart. He described me as "plump". I broke down in tears in the office because up until that point, I knew I wasn't fat or skinny, i was happy being normal... but after he called me that I second guessed myself.
Here we are, 3 weeks later relapsed into my ED because I can no longer trust my own judgement. I have heard two opinions from medical professionals and it kills me inside. I have bloods done and I am healthy, everyone who sees me thinks I look good and healthy. I used to believe that but now... I feel like a monster.
I can't trust a word anybody says to me. I don't even have the reassurance that "it's all in my head" because I now know the reality. I'm at the lowest of the lows. My body is suffering as I am desperately trying to lose weight. I am eating less than 150 calories a day and it is hurting me. I am shaky, dizzy, depressed and angry.
All of this because of doctors. They made me hate myself. I miss being able to enjoy my meals. I miss wearing whatever I wanted. I am now in a downwards spiral and I feel alone in this world. So incredibly alone.
So please, if you feel the same or have similar struggles, please let me know. I'm not asking for solutions I just need to know I am not alone in this fight. Thank you all.
submitted by chihuahua_vampire to EDAnonymous [link] [comments]
I thought this was the case for me until reality struck in. My whole life I was told "you're overreacting" and "you're normal it is dysmorphia" and "you don't need to lose weight".
Well if that's true tell me why one of my doctors said I am overweight and need to lose weight. I am supposed to be 130lbs but I am 148lbs , and no this is not what I told myself, this is what my doctor told me. I haven't been that weight since I was 12. TWELVE!! And to hear it come from a medical professional hurt and that triggered my ED in the first place when I was 13. In my head I would tell myself, "this isn't in your head, this is reality, you need to lose weight" and it ruined me. When people told me I was just experiencing "body dysmorphia" I didn't believe them. Because I knew what my "reality" was.
Over the years I realised that reaching that weight was not possible, no matter what I did. I began to feel comfortable in my own skin at my current weight. I was happy, I was enjoying food and I was confident in myself. Until one day we went to see this new doctor. He was specifically for weight loss. The word he used to describe me honestly broke my heart. He described me as "plump". I broke down in tears in the office because up until that point, I knew I wasn't fat or skinny, i was happy being normal... but after he called me that I second guessed myself.
Here we are, 3 weeks later relapsed into my ED because I can no longer trust my own judgement. I have heard two opinions from medical professionals and it kills me inside. I have bloods done and I am healthy, everyone who sees me thinks I look good and healthy. I used to believe that but now... I feel like a monster.
I can't trust a word anybody says to me. I don't even have the reassurance that "it's all in my head" because I now know the reality. I'm at the lowest of the lows. My body is suffering as I am desperately trying to lose weight. I am eating less than 150 calories a day and it is hurting me. I am shaky, dizzy, depressed and angry.
All of this because of doctors. They made me hate myself. I miss being able to enjoy my meals. I miss wearing whatever I wanted. I am now in a downwards spiral and I feel alone in this world. So incredibly alone.
So please, if you feel the same or have similar struggles, please let me know. I'm not asking for solutions I just need to know I am not alone in this fight. Thank you all.
2024.05.22 00:05 Darthkolli New Dining Hall App
 | submitted by Darthkolli to UCSC [link] [comments] |
2024.05.22 00:04 winteraddams Cat won't let me eat in peace
For context I adopted my cat 3 months ago, he's about 3 or 4 years old and neutered, lived on the streets for a while but was definitely not a stray his whole life, he's slept on my bed since the day we got him, never really hid, accepts and asks for affection etc.
There is one issue though: he cannot be around food (unless its fruit), he'll get inside the kitchen sink to lick any miniscule remnant of food and is unbothered if we turn the tap on, nothing can stop him.
If I'm eating I can't be sat for longer than half a minute before I have to get up to get him off of the counter or table, its an exhausting ordeal and he'll slap my leg right after I put him on the ground, usually not aggressively or anything.
If I put him in my room with the door closed he'll scream at the top of his lungs and sometimes (like today) he'll actually get aggressive when he realizes I'm picking him up to take him to my room, scratching, biting and growling.
He doesn't meow when he's in "baby jail" as me and my partner call it, he screams, he doesn't have a normal meow in general but when he wants to get out of the room (to eat, always to eat) he'll use all his lung capacity to push out the most demonic bellow I've ever heard coming from a cat, some times they even sound painful.
A friend of mine told me it's bad to lock him in the room when I'm eating but I really don't know what else to do, I'm a first time cat owner (I'm a vetmed student but it's been no help at all in this case lmao).
He's fed every 4 hours by the automatic feeder but even if he's just been fed if my mom puts food on my dog's bowl he'll scream to get out of the room so he can go and eat it himself.
He only does this when he hears people in the kitchen/living room (its an open space), otherwise he'll sleep on my bed the whole day without an issue, I've tried playing with him but he shows little interest in it so tiring him out is hard.
Also if, after a thorough inspection, he finds that there's nothing to eat or lick in the kitchen he'll go back to chilling on a chair or on my bed, this behavior is usually only an issue when I want to eat after cooking, when there is food or dirty dishes on the counter.
Is it bad that I put him in my room to eat? He screams so loud and I feel so bad but having to get up every 30 seconds makes meals impossible to enjoy.
Edit: just for more context, he doesn't have any kind of food aggression, some times I need to take his food for a second to put medicine on it after it's dispensed by the feeder and he's never tried to attack me for it (well yesterday he slapped the bowl as I was picking it up so food could fall to the ground and he could keep eating, but he never tried to hurt me).
The only time he gets aggressive is when I have to pick him up to put him in my room because we're eating or feeding Viper (the dog), and it doesn't always happen, some times he just lets me pick him up without issue.
submitted by winteraddams to CATHELP [link] [comments]
There is one issue though: he cannot be around food (unless its fruit), he'll get inside the kitchen sink to lick any miniscule remnant of food and is unbothered if we turn the tap on, nothing can stop him.
If I'm eating I can't be sat for longer than half a minute before I have to get up to get him off of the counter or table, its an exhausting ordeal and he'll slap my leg right after I put him on the ground, usually not aggressively or anything.
If I put him in my room with the door closed he'll scream at the top of his lungs and sometimes (like today) he'll actually get aggressive when he realizes I'm picking him up to take him to my room, scratching, biting and growling.
He doesn't meow when he's in "baby jail" as me and my partner call it, he screams, he doesn't have a normal meow in general but when he wants to get out of the room (to eat, always to eat) he'll use all his lung capacity to push out the most demonic bellow I've ever heard coming from a cat, some times they even sound painful.
A friend of mine told me it's bad to lock him in the room when I'm eating but I really don't know what else to do, I'm a first time cat owner (I'm a vetmed student but it's been no help at all in this case lmao).
He's fed every 4 hours by the automatic feeder but even if he's just been fed if my mom puts food on my dog's bowl he'll scream to get out of the room so he can go and eat it himself.
He only does this when he hears people in the kitchen/living room (its an open space), otherwise he'll sleep on my bed the whole day without an issue, I've tried playing with him but he shows little interest in it so tiring him out is hard.
Also if, after a thorough inspection, he finds that there's nothing to eat or lick in the kitchen he'll go back to chilling on a chair or on my bed, this behavior is usually only an issue when I want to eat after cooking, when there is food or dirty dishes on the counter.
Is it bad that I put him in my room to eat? He screams so loud and I feel so bad but having to get up every 30 seconds makes meals impossible to enjoy.
Edit: just for more context, he doesn't have any kind of food aggression, some times I need to take his food for a second to put medicine on it after it's dispensed by the feeder and he's never tried to attack me for it (well yesterday he slapped the bowl as I was picking it up so food could fall to the ground and he could keep eating, but he never tried to hurt me).
The only time he gets aggressive is when I have to pick him up to put him in my room because we're eating or feeding Viper (the dog), and it doesn't always happen, some times he just lets me pick him up without issue.
2024.05.22 00:01 Gossip-Luv2 Retrieved the content of Tweets on SLB's eccentricities - The Mythmaker’s Legacy - Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, I am the Greatest of Them All!
Thanks to Patron Member u/Entharo_entho - Here is the wiped out Tweet retrieved
Context - Wiped out from Internet
In March, I got a chance to work with filmmaker Sanjay Leela Bhansali right after he made Gangubai Kathiawadi, and Alia Bhatt, playing the titular character in the film, retweeted me.
The headline (in my head) was going to be, ‘The Boy From Kamathipura Goes To Bhansali Mandi.’
Then reality struck in April.
One of my closest friends Sweta called me from the Shivapuri National Park near Kathmandu and put me on speaker. Two other friends Mona and Ayush were listening to the WhatsApp call.
‘How’s it going with Bhansu?’ Sweta asked.
‘We are not working together anymore,’ I said.
‘Whaaaaaaaat?’ the three people shrieked, creating a wavy disturbance in audio frequency.
‘Whyyyyy?’ they cried, collectively anguished.
‘He said he is not feeling the vibes.’
‘What?’
‘Vibes,’ I said aloud, causing a seismic tremor in the audio frequency.
‘What vibes?’ Sweta jibed, ‘Maybe he can’t feel the vibrator.’
Laughter upped the vibes.
First, a little context on how I got that far. Check this, this, this & this.
So my tweets were going viral in February-March.
In the second week of March, a woman DM’d me saying she loves the tweets. I said thank you. She said she works at Bhansali Productions.
Whoopsie Daisy!
I asked if I could be a part of the production. She checked with SLB and team. He said he wants to meet now.
NOW!
How?
I was in Calcutta.
I called an actor friend in Bombay and told him about it.
“They will book your tickets and put you up in 5-star,” he said, “Like Hollywood.”
“This is Bhansaliwood,” I said, “Yahan dhanda hamesha manda hai.”
I flew (on my own expense) and met him.
I was ‘prepared’ by his team for the meeting with His High and Mightiness.
I was told:
I sashayed in a brown kurta and white linen trousers. Please see Madhuri Dixit-Nene’s brown ghagra for aesthetic reference I used from my very limited wardrobe of the only kurta I had at the time. By the way, the chorus sings ‘Jhanak Jhanak Payal Baaje,’ aesthetically referencing you know what, right?
He was lunching with his minions (strictly calling them minions from his pov) when I arrived in his pristine white dining hall in a building called Magnum Opus. Where else should he reside, no? Both his house, and his office (where I was ‘prepared’ earlier) were tastefully done in creamy white.
It was, as I said to my friend later, like walking into a cumulus cloud, or like sitting on his favourite singer Lata Mangeshkar’s lap. Calm, serene and quite surreal. I was inside his snow globe. Violins from a Bach concerto (in my head) were replaced with say Madan Mohan’s doleful rendition of ‘Mai ri main ka se kahoon peedh apne jiya ki.’ (Side effect of writing this on Mother’s Day.)
I look for books when I enter a house for signs of intelligent life. There were lots of lamps and candelabras but where were the stacks of books they were perched on? The aesthetic was high on film set disposable kitsch. I stared into a cumulative void.
The minions were intensely debating Darjeeling momos. What’s that? I spent my childhood there. Never heard of this GI tag!
SLB relished his meal and said, “I want puranpoli today.”
Puranpoli appeared not out of thin air, but a house-help flipping wishes instantly on a griddle on the fifth floor. We were on the first floor. Although the puranpoli is shaped like a flying saucer, it doesn’t fly, perhaps burdened by the weight of excess ghee and crowd-pleasing expectation. It does, however, reach SLB’s plate at the speed of light.
‘Give him some,’ he asked a minion to serve me while I waited on the sofa.
‘I’ve had lunch, thank you,’ I said, trying to behave. The plate arrived. I took a mousy bite to exhibit my failing attempt to transform into a champion minion.
When he came to chat, he noticed the unfinished food and gently reminded me how there were days he went hungry. I should have rolled my eyes for my own lean days.
‘One should not waste food,’ he said.
‘I don’t,’ I said, ‘I was going to parcel it home in a doggy bag.’
Hearing the word doggy, his well-behaved dog came over to inspect me.
He observed me. I petted her perfunctorily. Am a cat person. Stereotypical writer stuff — allergic to undesired petting and attention.
‘So, what have you done?’ he asked, sitting on a sort of empire-style bergere chair. Full marks for faux-ornate.
‘A novel, some writing for a series,’ I said nervously, dismissively.
‘Anything I might have seen?’ he asked.
‘No, not worthwhile.’
‘Are you interested in direction also?’
‘No, am not delusional.’
A moment passed. I might have displayed an errant repartee.
‘I mean, I can only write, or am trying to,’ I said. L’esprit de l’escalier.
He gave me a spiel on writing, how screenplay is an art not many understand, etc, et cetera.
I nodded to make his voice disappear.
‘What are you writing now?’
I showed him the cover of my new book, The Last Courtesan, featuring my mother, on my phone.
‘Oh, this is so fascinating,’ he said.
He spoke rapturously about Calcutta’s great food and colonial architecture when I mentioned growing up in Bowbazar kothas. If you watch any of his interviews now on YouTube you will realise he only speaks in raptures. He’s always explaining things like an impassioned conductor at a dime-store opera. It can exhaust the boorish audience immediately. He spoke about living in the Kamathipura area as a child when I said I had lived there. The mythmaker was interested in exoticising his own legend as an ‘outsider’.
‘But how will you work here if your mother is in Calcutta?’ he said, ‘I am a maa-ka-bhakt.’
Everything is about him or his mother. I have reached that stage too, though only by circumstances unavoidable.
‘Actually it was my mother who asked me to come here. I told her it would only work out if you understand that I will have to vacillate between the two cities initially. Jaise Sanjay ki Leela hai, waise meri Rekha.’
Corny dialogue, but worked. No one calls him by his first name, except perhaps his own mother. He is sir for everyone.
‘If I am speaking to you for so long means I like you,’ he said. ‘Otherwise, I would have asked you to leave long ago.’
Barely five minutes into the conversation, he asked me to return to his office and inform his team that I was going to be a part of his writer’s room.
I went back to his office and read a script. This is the part I cannot mention. His legal team sits in the adjacent room.
I flew to Calcutta and was to return after a week. I had to make arrangements for my mother’s tri-weekly dialysis sessions at a nearby hospital, figure out a tiffin-delivery service for her, find a house help (she sent four nurses scurrying in the past), all of which is a bit of a task in this retrograde city.
Remember the woman who had DM’d me about my tweets? She messaged. She had met SLB after my meeting. He said this about me: ‘What a wonderful find. That boy has so much potential and is talented. Most importantly, he is sensitive.’
I told her I’d get this engraved on my tombstone.
Like how he wants to take Alia Bhatt’s golchakkar in Dholida to his grave.
“It’s a shot that I will take to my grave. If there’s any shot that I want to be played when I breathe my last, it would be Alia doing that shot. It is the best thing I have seen an actor do in a very long, long time.”
I was only emulating the high priest of hyperbole in my tombstone comment. Perhaps I was regressing into a minion.
I had only managed a few tasks for mother when I was back in Bombay. It worried me that the old, frail woman with shaky limbs and slurred speech was trying to be brave to send me to work. I hadn’t worked since the pandemic; she was in and out of hospitals so frequently that I had surrendered the thought of getting another job ever again. Taking care of her was my full-time job.
The first day in his office was to chill in my new, aesthetically pleasing kurta I had shopped for in Gariahat. There was a security camera in every corner that was apparently accessible on his phone. My skin tingled with this information. Chilled. He was at home. Probably watching. That’s a great way to create a myth.
The next day, there were more minions on the lunch table in his first floor apartment. The magically appearing steamy and fragrant sheera was delicious. A minion deemed it the best sheera in the city. I nodded to make that statement evaporate.
A courier boy interrupted for a document signature. SLB flared at a spelling mistake in the document papers.
‘Go wash your face and come back,’ he yelled at the young man.
The minions at the table laughed nervously. I so wished I was wearing a mask to cover my surprise emoji face.
The minions on the table were writers and assistant directors.
‘Dastavez,’ SLB said, ‘would that be correct to use?’
‘Kaaghzaat,’ the minion replied.
‘Kaaghzaat is paper, dastavez is document,’ said the second minion.
‘You always mislead me,’ SLB sternly reprimanded the first minion. ‘Don’t ever do that again.’
Only that minion tried to laugh, offering an apology. He shut the minion down.
My mask, my mask emoji face.
A third minion was sulking in a corner before I arrived for the writing session. This minion had reportedly offered a script suggestion, which he disliked and barked down. I liked this minion the most. Relatable.
A faint noise of a person running or perhaps just a rumbling sound from somewhere outside interrupted the room. He looked up at the ceiling and said, ‘No one lives there. Am certain it is a ghost. I hear running sounds all the time. I have heard sounds of furniture being dragged.’
I wondered if he actually believed in half the things he uttered, or was he just saying it to create enigma about himself. Mythical thoughts certainly kept him preoccupied.
Reality bored him. SLB had nothing good to say about the ‘current plague’ of South Indian films upsetting the Bollywood cartel. He compared them to a circus. He wasn’t kind to the actors he had worked with in his last film. He cracked lame jokes about everyone and everything. The minions laughed and kept him busy. I chuckled a few times to blend in. The mythmaker revelled in his prophesies about the impending doom of charlatans with no aesthetics: just crass, commercial peddlers pimping art. It was all said to amuse and bemuse while he fussed over the yellow shade of fabric from several swatches.
When he left for his music session, the minions bitched him out, and how! All the horror stories I had heard over the years about his moods, behaviour, language and violent temper were true. How else will he create myth about himself as a maestro? The Glomar response. Let the plebs indulge in hearsay. I will neither confirm nor deny. The minions sang effigy songs in happy tunes, if I may stretch this part a bit like his penchant for high camp.
That night, when I went to my actor friend’s house, where I was temporarily staying, I said to him, ‘I don’t think I will last a week there.’
I was rattled by how he spoke to the courier boy and the minions, with no filter. Well, at least it was clear he had no tact, endearing as that might be of a ‘genius’ if one compromises with his erratic behaviour. The CEO of his company does it beautifully and advises to develop a ‘thick hide’ around him. Cows, essentially.
Verve
The words genius, great, master, maverick, were so loosely bandied by his office staff even in his absence that I was tempted to add auteur, if they could spell or pronounce it. They worked in perpetual fear of him turning up at any hour and checking on their tidiness. A minion whined she wasn’t dressed appropriately for his surprise visit. Once, he even cut pay for unscheduled leave, said another minion. A minion narrated a shot he copied from a photographer in Gangubai Kathiawadi. Another minion recounted how he made her cry on shoot by screaming at her for a silly mistake. Minions couldn’t leave the office till his evenings were scheduled. It was a well-paying job so long as they did not have to see ‘chacha’s’ face and only applaud his cinematic sorcery.
His office team would assign me desk-work and warn me not to inform him about it.
‘What am I supposed to say if he asks?’
‘Make up something,’ I was told.
‘Why should I?’
‘You will slowly understand,’ I was told.
His team of assistants would sneak around me. I didn’t know who was reporting what back to him. He would interrogate the management team. They would lash out at me for informing the assistants. The management wanted to control me a certain way because ‘sir’ does not need to know everything. It was quite a guessing game. He had created an ecosystem of complete chaos and loved the hubbub. New people were hired for him to use the ‘new energy’ to rekindle the ‘old energy’ that needed to be reminded it could be snuffed out and replaced. He thrived on confusion because it all boiled down to him to sort out the mess. He was the provider so long as the minions ingratiated and served their grand master.
One time he called me upstairs, what his CEO called the god’s chamber aka the Shahenshah’s durbar: his office on the seventh floor. Walls were lined with giant posters of his films. We minions sat on the fifth floor. I was of course by now a week old in the toady mill. On the seventh floor, production team members, set designer, director assistant, young people sat on the floor, armed with notebooks and laptops, alert and sugar-tongued. He sat on a throne and dictated each one about their duty. A masseur massaged his leg. He asked me what I thought of a script. I said it was lovely. He asked me to elaborate. I said I liked a character’s resolve. He denied it was written. I said that’s my interpretation. A minion promptly backed me.
‘What changes do you suggest?’ he asked.
‘We should sit on it collectively and decide,’ I said.
He mumbled something. My suggestion was dismissed. I was dismissed. I bowed out. A minion whispered to me, ‘We all walk on eggshells around him.’ I had to be a chicken in a coop I suppose.
Another time he dismissed my suggestion for a scene saying, ‘That’s not how art is made.’ I had referenced a scene from Bandit Queen to illustrate my point. Just like his entire oeuvre is homage to a classic. How else does he make his art?
Allow me to illustrate with a frame from his first film Khamoshi: The Musical. The second image is from Pakeezah.
Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam references Red Beard, Woh 7 Din.
Devdas references Pakeezah more than once.
Black references The Miracle Worker.
Saawariya references Pyaasa, Awaara.
Guzaarish references Whose Life Is It Anyway?
Goliyon Ki Raasleela: Ram-Leela references Franco Zeffirelli’s Romeo and Juliet, West Side Story.
Bajirao Mastani references Mughal-E-Azam.
Padmaavat references Mirch Masala.
Gangubai Kathiawadi, let’s give him the benefit of doubt is all his own, original artistry.
The American filmmaker Jim Jarmusch once meta quoted the French filmmaker Jean-Luc Godard when he said:
“Nothing is original. Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination. Devour old films, new films, music, books, paintings, photographs, poems, dreams, random conversations, architecture, bridges, street signs, trees, clouds, bodies of water, light and shadows. Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul. If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic. Authenticity is invaluable; originality is non-existent. And don’t bother concealing your thievery — celebrate it if you feel like it. In any case, always remember what Jean-Luc Godard said: “It’s not where you take things from — it’s where you take them to.”
SLB believes he takes art and betters it, removing the grubby coat of slime from the sublime, often not concerned with acknowledging the source. He is a master’s master, elevating it to an otherworldly experience, the creator of a mythoverse.
He asked me to rewrite a scene I didn’t agree with. He banged the script folders on the table like a petulant, little child. I watched his posture change into a frump. Tiger Shroff’s ‘Bacchi ho kya,’ dialogue comes to mind.
‘You are talking like those critics who find fault but don’t know how to write. They should write the film,’ he said.
That argument will never make sense to me but since I write movies now and not just about them, I rewrote the scene in half an hour and showed it to him. He found it rubbish.
I was not called to the writer’s room for a week.
His CEO said I should go to his house; hang around him, like the other assistants whose only purpose in life is to feed his ego. We are slaves to his vision, she said. She thought I was a better writer than the team he had assembled. ‘From whatever I read, only three lines of your work on social media, I could sense it,’ she said.
Either she was encouraging, or bluffing with a perfectly Zen face. From the hundreds of Ganesh idols stacked in her room, it was clear she wasn’t a reader. She was good at reading numbers, data, and stats. She would sense a sign if one of the metal idols sucked milk from a spoon on the day she enquired about box –office figures.
There was more than one right-wing hardliner in his office. Secular staff was invisible. A pretty minion in baby pink t-shirt, whose main grouse was that another minion called him a Barbie doll, said he was happy with the Modi government building roads in his home state Bihar. Another minion countered him by asking: What about the persecution of minorities by the same government? The pretty minion said he didn’t care for that. He was assisting ‘sir’ because he wanted to be an actor. Which lead me to wonder how many Muslim actors has this production worked with? Silly of me to think, right? Given that I myself don’t use my Muslim surname. I’ve now successfully planted a myth in your head. That’s how it works.
In the time that I was in Versova during my brief stint at Bhansali Productions, I met several people with their own SLB horror story. A producer said, ‘He is a difficult man but life changes for good after you work with him. Some people want to go through hell first. Life bann jaati hai.’ I didn’t understand why purgatory was necessary. Another former assistant said, ‘When you work with the worst (SLB) and the best (KJO), you are ready for the rest.’
A young woman gave him a thesis she wrote on his films. He asked her to write a book on her. She said she wanted to assist as a director. She never heard from him. A filmmaker said SLB was too friendly with another assistant, suggesting intimacy. A writer wasn’t given credit in a film.
Another writer was promised his script will be turned into a film but it never took off and now he feels his life has been ruined. A young filmmaker’s debut movie SLB produced was delayed, not promoted, and called ‘kachra’ to his face.
The young man said SLB is sexist, homophobe, classist, fat shamer, emotional abuser, and a body shamer. “He is a joyless pit of darkness where happiness goes to die. And those are the nicest words I can think of to describe him,” he said. Another filmmaker said a choreographer was in a relationship with SLB and wanted to marry him but he wouldn’t even touch her, a hotly discussed conversation amongst his minions.
Everything sounds hokum. A successful man is likely to upset a few. The few will talk. Their words may ring true through a gossamer veil of implausibility. Myths magnifying his persona.
There are too many myths about his personal life, aroused by his silence on the subject but all too obvious in his work. When people want to confirm with me, I am equally appalled at their lack of aesthetics. Like the great reader of curtains, Edgar Allan Poe, you only have to look at SLB’s use of billowy curtains in films to guess.
Hope you get the drift, or draft, hawa ka jhonka! By the way, am digressing now, is the weirdly named character Sameer Rosselline in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam the first mainstream Hindi film hero to pass wind? The ruffled curtains are first to be cautioned though.
Unlike most people willing to swallow their pride to work with SLB, few like the eponymous Gangubai character choose izzat. The house-help employed in my actor friend’s house was asked to work as a cook in his house. When she heard the whimsy, dessert-craving demands, she declined the offer. I identify with her no-nonsense style.
In November 2021, a filmmaker read a film script I wrote and said, ‘This is SLB territory. Only he can make it. It is the modern love-story he has been wanting to make for a long time.’
‘Are you sure?’ I asked, somewhat flattered but also bewildered.
‘Yes, we just have to change the setting from Calcutta-Bombay to Calcutta-New York. It is what he has been trying to crack. I’ll get him to read it.’
I never spoke to SLB about my script. I did not want to look like a schemer. I had only got a chance because of my mother’s story. I had come to write courtesan songs. Hindi films are recognised by their songs. His films have show tunes that live on long after the sequins and mirrors reflect a decadent style. He employs the old-fashioned method of making Hindi films, which is to stitch scenes around a song, not the other way round. And when you glean your references from the best of classical melodies, how can you falter?
My own SLB story is that after watching Saawariya in 2007, I wrote a few songs, moved to Bombay, lived in Versova, close to Magnum Opus, and hoped to meet him, but made no effort even though I came in close contact with people who worked directly with him. I never requested for a meeting. Over the years, I too had heard a few horror stories about him. I only believe in what I see. I waited when he would call for me, my work would have to speak for itself.
A day before Good Friday, his CEO sat me down and said it’s not working out.
There’s a mythical story of how Lata Mangeshkar was on her way to record a song for SLB but the heavens poured and she had to turn her car back. A typical SLB frame of hope and hopelessness.
Never work with your idols. You’ll have a better story to imagine and create myths.
I was so relieved to leave. I hadn’t got a moment to read, or write, let alone think since I got here. Why I wanted to work with SLB was to not believe in hearsay. I will either confirm or deny.
‘Great,’ I said, ‘everyone deserves an off on Good Friday.’
The office was unsure about public holidays. SLB’s mood dictated the calendar.
Before returning to Calcutta, I met a friend entrenched in the film business.
When she heard of the fiasco, she said, ‘I’ve heard he is very anal, is he?’
The vibrator jokes never stop.
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Context - Wiped out from Internet
In March, I got a chance to work with filmmaker Sanjay Leela Bhansali right after he made Gangubai Kathiawadi, and Alia Bhatt, playing the titular character in the film, retweeted me.
The headline (in my head) was going to be, ‘The Boy From Kamathipura Goes To Bhansali Mandi.’
Then reality struck in April.
One of my closest friends Sweta called me from the Shivapuri National Park near Kathmandu and put me on speaker. Two other friends Mona and Ayush were listening to the WhatsApp call.
‘How’s it going with Bhansu?’ Sweta asked.
‘We are not working together anymore,’ I said.
‘Whaaaaaaaat?’ the three people shrieked, creating a wavy disturbance in audio frequency.
‘Whyyyyy?’ they cried, collectively anguished.
‘He said he is not feeling the vibes.’
‘What?’
‘Vibes,’ I said aloud, causing a seismic tremor in the audio frequency.
‘What vibes?’ Sweta jibed, ‘Maybe he can’t feel the vibrator.’
Laughter upped the vibes.
First, a little context on how I got that far. Check this, this, this & this.
So my tweets were going viral in February-March.
In the second week of March, a woman DM’d me saying she loves the tweets. I said thank you. She said she works at Bhansali Productions.
Whoopsie Daisy!
I asked if I could be a part of the production. She checked with SLB and team. He said he wants to meet now.
NOW!
How?
I was in Calcutta.
I called an actor friend in Bombay and told him about it.
“They will book your tickets and put you up in 5-star,” he said, “Like Hollywood.”
“This is Bhansaliwood,” I said, “Yahan dhanda hamesha manda hai.”
I flew (on my own expense) and met him.
I was ‘prepared’ by his team for the meeting with His High and Mightiness.
I was told:
Arre, then what do I say?
I sashayed in a brown kurta and white linen trousers. Please see Madhuri Dixit-Nene’s brown ghagra for aesthetic reference I used from my very limited wardrobe of the only kurta I had at the time. By the way, the chorus sings ‘Jhanak Jhanak Payal Baaje,’ aesthetically referencing you know what, right?
He was lunching with his minions (strictly calling them minions from his pov) when I arrived in his pristine white dining hall in a building called Magnum Opus. Where else should he reside, no? Both his house, and his office (where I was ‘prepared’ earlier) were tastefully done in creamy white.
It was, as I said to my friend later, like walking into a cumulus cloud, or like sitting on his favourite singer Lata Mangeshkar’s lap. Calm, serene and quite surreal. I was inside his snow globe. Violins from a Bach concerto (in my head) were replaced with say Madan Mohan’s doleful rendition of ‘Mai ri main ka se kahoon peedh apne jiya ki.’ (Side effect of writing this on Mother’s Day.)
I look for books when I enter a house for signs of intelligent life. There were lots of lamps and candelabras but where were the stacks of books they were perched on? The aesthetic was high on film set disposable kitsch. I stared into a cumulative void.
The minions were intensely debating Darjeeling momos. What’s that? I spent my childhood there. Never heard of this GI tag!
SLB relished his meal and said, “I want puranpoli today.”
Puranpoli appeared not out of thin air, but a house-help flipping wishes instantly on a griddle on the fifth floor. We were on the first floor. Although the puranpoli is shaped like a flying saucer, it doesn’t fly, perhaps burdened by the weight of excess ghee and crowd-pleasing expectation. It does, however, reach SLB’s plate at the speed of light.
‘Give him some,’ he asked a minion to serve me while I waited on the sofa.
‘I’ve had lunch, thank you,’ I said, trying to behave. The plate arrived. I took a mousy bite to exhibit my failing attempt to transform into a champion minion.
When he came to chat, he noticed the unfinished food and gently reminded me how there were days he went hungry. I should have rolled my eyes for my own lean days.
‘One should not waste food,’ he said.
‘I don’t,’ I said, ‘I was going to parcel it home in a doggy bag.’
Hearing the word doggy, his well-behaved dog came over to inspect me.
He observed me. I petted her perfunctorily. Am a cat person. Stereotypical writer stuff — allergic to undesired petting and attention.
‘So, what have you done?’ he asked, sitting on a sort of empire-style bergere chair. Full marks for faux-ornate.
‘A novel, some writing for a series,’ I said nervously, dismissively.
‘Anything I might have seen?’ he asked.
‘No, not worthwhile.’
‘Are you interested in direction also?’
‘No, am not delusional.’
A moment passed. I might have displayed an errant repartee.
‘I mean, I can only write, or am trying to,’ I said. L’esprit de l’escalier.
He gave me a spiel on writing, how screenplay is an art not many understand, etc, et cetera.
I nodded to make his voice disappear.
‘What are you writing now?’
I showed him the cover of my new book, The Last Courtesan, featuring my mother, on my phone.
‘Oh, this is so fascinating,’ he said.
He spoke rapturously about Calcutta’s great food and colonial architecture when I mentioned growing up in Bowbazar kothas. If you watch any of his interviews now on YouTube you will realise he only speaks in raptures. He’s always explaining things like an impassioned conductor at a dime-store opera. It can exhaust the boorish audience immediately. He spoke about living in the Kamathipura area as a child when I said I had lived there. The mythmaker was interested in exoticising his own legend as an ‘outsider’.
‘But how will you work here if your mother is in Calcutta?’ he said, ‘I am a maa-ka-bhakt.’
Everything is about him or his mother. I have reached that stage too, though only by circumstances unavoidable.
‘Actually it was my mother who asked me to come here. I told her it would only work out if you understand that I will have to vacillate between the two cities initially. Jaise Sanjay ki Leela hai, waise meri Rekha.’
Corny dialogue, but worked. No one calls him by his first name, except perhaps his own mother. He is sir for everyone.
‘If I am speaking to you for so long means I like you,’ he said. ‘Otherwise, I would have asked you to leave long ago.’
Barely five minutes into the conversation, he asked me to return to his office and inform his team that I was going to be a part of his writer’s room.
I went back to his office and read a script. This is the part I cannot mention. His legal team sits in the adjacent room.
I flew to Calcutta and was to return after a week. I had to make arrangements for my mother’s tri-weekly dialysis sessions at a nearby hospital, figure out a tiffin-delivery service for her, find a house help (she sent four nurses scurrying in the past), all of which is a bit of a task in this retrograde city.
Remember the woman who had DM’d me about my tweets? She messaged. She had met SLB after my meeting. He said this about me: ‘What a wonderful find. That boy has so much potential and is talented. Most importantly, he is sensitive.’
I told her I’d get this engraved on my tombstone.
Like how he wants to take Alia Bhatt’s golchakkar in Dholida to his grave.
“It’s a shot that I will take to my grave. If there’s any shot that I want to be played when I breathe my last, it would be Alia doing that shot. It is the best thing I have seen an actor do in a very long, long time.”
I was only emulating the high priest of hyperbole in my tombstone comment. Perhaps I was regressing into a minion.
I had only managed a few tasks for mother when I was back in Bombay. It worried me that the old, frail woman with shaky limbs and slurred speech was trying to be brave to send me to work. I hadn’t worked since the pandemic; she was in and out of hospitals so frequently that I had surrendered the thought of getting another job ever again. Taking care of her was my full-time job.
The first day in his office was to chill in my new, aesthetically pleasing kurta I had shopped for in Gariahat. There was a security camera in every corner that was apparently accessible on his phone. My skin tingled with this information. Chilled. He was at home. Probably watching. That’s a great way to create a myth.
The next day, there were more minions on the lunch table in his first floor apartment. The magically appearing steamy and fragrant sheera was delicious. A minion deemed it the best sheera in the city. I nodded to make that statement evaporate.
A courier boy interrupted for a document signature. SLB flared at a spelling mistake in the document papers.
‘Go wash your face and come back,’ he yelled at the young man.
The minions at the table laughed nervously. I so wished I was wearing a mask to cover my surprise emoji face.
The minions on the table were writers and assistant directors.
‘Dastavez,’ SLB said, ‘would that be correct to use?’
‘Kaaghzaat,’ the minion replied.
‘Kaaghzaat is paper, dastavez is document,’ said the second minion.
‘You always mislead me,’ SLB sternly reprimanded the first minion. ‘Don’t ever do that again.’
Only that minion tried to laugh, offering an apology. He shut the minion down.
My mask, my mask emoji face.
A third minion was sulking in a corner before I arrived for the writing session. This minion had reportedly offered a script suggestion, which he disliked and barked down. I liked this minion the most. Relatable.
A faint noise of a person running or perhaps just a rumbling sound from somewhere outside interrupted the room. He looked up at the ceiling and said, ‘No one lives there. Am certain it is a ghost. I hear running sounds all the time. I have heard sounds of furniture being dragged.’
I wondered if he actually believed in half the things he uttered, or was he just saying it to create enigma about himself. Mythical thoughts certainly kept him preoccupied.
Reality bored him. SLB had nothing good to say about the ‘current plague’ of South Indian films upsetting the Bollywood cartel. He compared them to a circus. He wasn’t kind to the actors he had worked with in his last film. He cracked lame jokes about everyone and everything. The minions laughed and kept him busy. I chuckled a few times to blend in. The mythmaker revelled in his prophesies about the impending doom of charlatans with no aesthetics: just crass, commercial peddlers pimping art. It was all said to amuse and bemuse while he fussed over the yellow shade of fabric from several swatches.
When he left for his music session, the minions bitched him out, and how! All the horror stories I had heard over the years about his moods, behaviour, language and violent temper were true. How else will he create myth about himself as a maestro? The Glomar response. Let the plebs indulge in hearsay. I will neither confirm nor deny. The minions sang effigy songs in happy tunes, if I may stretch this part a bit like his penchant for high camp.
That night, when I went to my actor friend’s house, where I was temporarily staying, I said to him, ‘I don’t think I will last a week there.’
I was rattled by how he spoke to the courier boy and the minions, with no filter. Well, at least it was clear he had no tact, endearing as that might be of a ‘genius’ if one compromises with his erratic behaviour. The CEO of his company does it beautifully and advises to develop a ‘thick hide’ around him. Cows, essentially.
Verve
The words genius, great, master, maverick, were so loosely bandied by his office staff even in his absence that I was tempted to add auteur, if they could spell or pronounce it. They worked in perpetual fear of him turning up at any hour and checking on their tidiness. A minion whined she wasn’t dressed appropriately for his surprise visit. Once, he even cut pay for unscheduled leave, said another minion. A minion narrated a shot he copied from a photographer in Gangubai Kathiawadi. Another minion recounted how he made her cry on shoot by screaming at her for a silly mistake. Minions couldn’t leave the office till his evenings were scheduled. It was a well-paying job so long as they did not have to see ‘chacha’s’ face and only applaud his cinematic sorcery.
His office team would assign me desk-work and warn me not to inform him about it.
‘What am I supposed to say if he asks?’
‘Make up something,’ I was told.
‘Why should I?’
‘You will slowly understand,’ I was told.
His team of assistants would sneak around me. I didn’t know who was reporting what back to him. He would interrogate the management team. They would lash out at me for informing the assistants. The management wanted to control me a certain way because ‘sir’ does not need to know everything. It was quite a guessing game. He had created an ecosystem of complete chaos and loved the hubbub. New people were hired for him to use the ‘new energy’ to rekindle the ‘old energy’ that needed to be reminded it could be snuffed out and replaced. He thrived on confusion because it all boiled down to him to sort out the mess. He was the provider so long as the minions ingratiated and served their grand master.
One time he called me upstairs, what his CEO called the god’s chamber aka the Shahenshah’s durbar: his office on the seventh floor. Walls were lined with giant posters of his films. We minions sat on the fifth floor. I was of course by now a week old in the toady mill. On the seventh floor, production team members, set designer, director assistant, young people sat on the floor, armed with notebooks and laptops, alert and sugar-tongued. He sat on a throne and dictated each one about their duty. A masseur massaged his leg. He asked me what I thought of a script. I said it was lovely. He asked me to elaborate. I said I liked a character’s resolve. He denied it was written. I said that’s my interpretation. A minion promptly backed me.
‘What changes do you suggest?’ he asked.
‘We should sit on it collectively and decide,’ I said.
He mumbled something. My suggestion was dismissed. I was dismissed. I bowed out. A minion whispered to me, ‘We all walk on eggshells around him.’ I had to be a chicken in a coop I suppose.
Another time he dismissed my suggestion for a scene saying, ‘That’s not how art is made.’ I had referenced a scene from Bandit Queen to illustrate my point. Just like his entire oeuvre is homage to a classic. How else does he make his art?
Allow me to illustrate with a frame from his first film Khamoshi: The Musical. The second image is from Pakeezah.
Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam references Red Beard, Woh 7 Din.
Devdas references Pakeezah more than once.
Black references The Miracle Worker.
Saawariya references Pyaasa, Awaara.
Guzaarish references Whose Life Is It Anyway?
Goliyon Ki Raasleela: Ram-Leela references Franco Zeffirelli’s Romeo and Juliet, West Side Story.
Bajirao Mastani references Mughal-E-Azam.
Padmaavat references Mirch Masala.
Gangubai Kathiawadi, let’s give him the benefit of doubt is all his own, original artistry.
The American filmmaker Jim Jarmusch once meta quoted the French filmmaker Jean-Luc Godard when he said:
“Nothing is original. Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination. Devour old films, new films, music, books, paintings, photographs, poems, dreams, random conversations, architecture, bridges, street signs, trees, clouds, bodies of water, light and shadows. Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul. If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic. Authenticity is invaluable; originality is non-existent. And don’t bother concealing your thievery — celebrate it if you feel like it. In any case, always remember what Jean-Luc Godard said: “It’s not where you take things from — it’s where you take them to.”
SLB believes he takes art and betters it, removing the grubby coat of slime from the sublime, often not concerned with acknowledging the source. He is a master’s master, elevating it to an otherworldly experience, the creator of a mythoverse.
He asked me to rewrite a scene I didn’t agree with. He banged the script folders on the table like a petulant, little child. I watched his posture change into a frump. Tiger Shroff’s ‘Bacchi ho kya,’ dialogue comes to mind.
‘You are talking like those critics who find fault but don’t know how to write. They should write the film,’ he said.
That argument will never make sense to me but since I write movies now and not just about them, I rewrote the scene in half an hour and showed it to him. He found it rubbish.
I was not called to the writer’s room for a week.
His CEO said I should go to his house; hang around him, like the other assistants whose only purpose in life is to feed his ego. We are slaves to his vision, she said. She thought I was a better writer than the team he had assembled. ‘From whatever I read, only three lines of your work on social media, I could sense it,’ she said.
Either she was encouraging, or bluffing with a perfectly Zen face. From the hundreds of Ganesh idols stacked in her room, it was clear she wasn’t a reader. She was good at reading numbers, data, and stats. She would sense a sign if one of the metal idols sucked milk from a spoon on the day she enquired about box –office figures.
There was more than one right-wing hardliner in his office. Secular staff was invisible. A pretty minion in baby pink t-shirt, whose main grouse was that another minion called him a Barbie doll, said he was happy with the Modi government building roads in his home state Bihar. Another minion countered him by asking: What about the persecution of minorities by the same government? The pretty minion said he didn’t care for that. He was assisting ‘sir’ because he wanted to be an actor. Which lead me to wonder how many Muslim actors has this production worked with? Silly of me to think, right? Given that I myself don’t use my Muslim surname. I’ve now successfully planted a myth in your head. That’s how it works.
In the time that I was in Versova during my brief stint at Bhansali Productions, I met several people with their own SLB horror story. A producer said, ‘He is a difficult man but life changes for good after you work with him. Some people want to go through hell first. Life bann jaati hai.’ I didn’t understand why purgatory was necessary. Another former assistant said, ‘When you work with the worst (SLB) and the best (KJO), you are ready for the rest.’
A young woman gave him a thesis she wrote on his films. He asked her to write a book on her. She said she wanted to assist as a director. She never heard from him. A filmmaker said SLB was too friendly with another assistant, suggesting intimacy. A writer wasn’t given credit in a film.
Another writer was promised his script will be turned into a film but it never took off and now he feels his life has been ruined. A young filmmaker’s debut movie SLB produced was delayed, not promoted, and called ‘kachra’ to his face.
The young man said SLB is sexist, homophobe, classist, fat shamer, emotional abuser, and a body shamer. “He is a joyless pit of darkness where happiness goes to die. And those are the nicest words I can think of to describe him,” he said. Another filmmaker said a choreographer was in a relationship with SLB and wanted to marry him but he wouldn’t even touch her, a hotly discussed conversation amongst his minions.
Everything sounds hokum. A successful man is likely to upset a few. The few will talk. Their words may ring true through a gossamer veil of implausibility. Myths magnifying his persona.
There are too many myths about his personal life, aroused by his silence on the subject but all too obvious in his work. When people want to confirm with me, I am equally appalled at their lack of aesthetics. Like the great reader of curtains, Edgar Allan Poe, you only have to look at SLB’s use of billowy curtains in films to guess.
Above stanza, courtesy Poe, poem: The Raven.
Hope you get the drift, or draft, hawa ka jhonka! By the way, am digressing now, is the weirdly named character Sameer Rosselline in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam the first mainstream Hindi film hero to pass wind? The ruffled curtains are first to be cautioned though.
Unlike most people willing to swallow their pride to work with SLB, few like the eponymous Gangubai character choose izzat. The house-help employed in my actor friend’s house was asked to work as a cook in his house. When she heard the whimsy, dessert-craving demands, she declined the offer. I identify with her no-nonsense style.
In November 2021, a filmmaker read a film script I wrote and said, ‘This is SLB territory. Only he can make it. It is the modern love-story he has been wanting to make for a long time.’
‘Are you sure?’ I asked, somewhat flattered but also bewildered.
‘Yes, we just have to change the setting from Calcutta-Bombay to Calcutta-New York. It is what he has been trying to crack. I’ll get him to read it.’
I never spoke to SLB about my script. I did not want to look like a schemer. I had only got a chance because of my mother’s story. I had come to write courtesan songs. Hindi films are recognised by their songs. His films have show tunes that live on long after the sequins and mirrors reflect a decadent style. He employs the old-fashioned method of making Hindi films, which is to stitch scenes around a song, not the other way round. And when you glean your references from the best of classical melodies, how can you falter?
My own SLB story is that after watching Saawariya in 2007, I wrote a few songs, moved to Bombay, lived in Versova, close to Magnum Opus, and hoped to meet him, but made no effort even though I came in close contact with people who worked directly with him. I never requested for a meeting. Over the years, I too had heard a few horror stories about him. I only believe in what I see. I waited when he would call for me, my work would have to speak for itself.
A day before Good Friday, his CEO sat me down and said it’s not working out.
There’s a mythical story of how Lata Mangeshkar was on her way to record a song for SLB but the heavens poured and she had to turn her car back. A typical SLB frame of hope and hopelessness.
Never work with your idols. You’ll have a better story to imagine and create myths.
I was so relieved to leave. I hadn’t got a moment to read, or write, let alone think since I got here. Why I wanted to work with SLB was to not believe in hearsay. I will either confirm or deny.
‘Great,’ I said, ‘everyone deserves an off on Good Friday.’
The office was unsure about public holidays. SLB’s mood dictated the calendar.
Before returning to Calcutta, I met a friend entrenched in the film business.
When she heard of the fiasco, she said, ‘I’ve heard he is very anal, is he?’
The vibrator jokes never stop.
2024.05.21 23:50 shaneka69 Cheesy Chipotle Mukbang
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2024.05.21 23:50 Causaldude555 Y’all know any cheap good quality freezes dried food.
Ok so I been buying the mountain house freezed dried food that lasts for 25 years. But they expensive at 10 dollars for like 500 calories. I don’t know which brands are good so any suggestions
submitted by Causaldude555 to preppers [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 23:49 edvard7 Suggestions for china
Hey all,
I’m a ‘beginner’ china player with around 40 hours of gametime and only with china. To this point I have watched a lot of guides, a lot of casted and ffa games. Still I think my biggest failure is just not having enough play time with aoe.
I am most confused about what kind of build order I should go with. I would like to get more aggressive in feudal, so Song dynasty to Zhuganu seems like a good idea, but if I play against a MMA civ, my zhuganu are worthless, can’t really counter them only by going into FC and going palace guards+crossbow. So at the moment I only have a build order for song dynasty then I do whatever feels right and usually end up loosing. I have issue with food, I am afraid to go out on the map for food, because I’ll loose my villagers, if I go granary boom, I need to wall off, which is okay, but like 10 units can flame down a wall pretty fast and I am raided.
I am also afraid about going 2tc, because I forget to make villagers with even 1 tc. I usually end up with around 80 villagers by the end of an imperial game. Here I come to my last point, I usually loose my imperial games and I don’t really know why, everywhere I read that if china goes imperial it’s unbeatable, except when I play it. But as in the recent Beasty video, I don’t want to learn imperial, I want to learn feudal fighting.
Any suggestions or even guides would be appreciated. Thank you.
submitted by edvard7 to aoe4 [link] [comments]
I’m a ‘beginner’ china player with around 40 hours of gametime and only with china. To this point I have watched a lot of guides, a lot of casted and ffa games. Still I think my biggest failure is just not having enough play time with aoe.
I am most confused about what kind of build order I should go with. I would like to get more aggressive in feudal, so Song dynasty to Zhuganu seems like a good idea, but if I play against a MMA civ, my zhuganu are worthless, can’t really counter them only by going into FC and going palace guards+crossbow. So at the moment I only have a build order for song dynasty then I do whatever feels right and usually end up loosing. I have issue with food, I am afraid to go out on the map for food, because I’ll loose my villagers, if I go granary boom, I need to wall off, which is okay, but like 10 units can flame down a wall pretty fast and I am raided.
I am also afraid about going 2tc, because I forget to make villagers with even 1 tc. I usually end up with around 80 villagers by the end of an imperial game. Here I come to my last point, I usually loose my imperial games and I don’t really know why, everywhere I read that if china goes imperial it’s unbeatable, except when I play it. But as in the recent Beasty video, I don’t want to learn imperial, I want to learn feudal fighting.
Any suggestions or even guides would be appreciated. Thank you.
2024.05.21 23:48 shaneka69 Chipotle Mukbang!
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submitted by shaneka69 to globalpromo [link] [comments]
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2024.05.21 23:47 smokey_da_roach Not eating enough fat
I’m new to keto and I’m finding it super challenging to get enough fat into my diet without going over my calorie limit.
I’m trying to eat 1800 calories a day, 140g of fat, 113g of protein, and < ~23g of net carbs.
I’m using the Carb Manager app to track what I eat, and this app is also where I got those ^ goals from.
I’m eating mostly tuna, eggs, broccoli, spinach, green beans, chicken, avocado, cheese, etc. I’ve added more butter into the things I cook for extra fat but it’s not enough. Even super high fat foods like bacon seem like bad options because of the calories.
I’m looking for some recommendations on what kinds of food help you reach the amount of fat you’re supposed to eat. Thanks 🙏🏻
submitted by smokey_da_roach to keto [link] [comments]
I’m trying to eat 1800 calories a day, 140g of fat, 113g of protein, and < ~23g of net carbs.
I’m using the Carb Manager app to track what I eat, and this app is also where I got those ^ goals from.
I’m eating mostly tuna, eggs, broccoli, spinach, green beans, chicken, avocado, cheese, etc. I’ve added more butter into the things I cook for extra fat but it’s not enough. Even super high fat foods like bacon seem like bad options because of the calories.
I’m looking for some recommendations on what kinds of food help you reach the amount of fat you’re supposed to eat. Thanks 🙏🏻
2024.05.21 23:43 DoAnythingBeExtra Been stuck in a plateau so decided to do a before/after to remind myself how far I’ve come 🙌🏼
43 F wasn’t T2 but was in Pre diabetic range for over a year and my gyno actually was the one who referred me to a an MD to prescribe it. I cannot tell you what a life changer it has been. I have been all weights on the scale from normal and then chubby as a kid, then back to regular weight as a teen, then to curvy and then to super skinny thanks to excessive dieting which lead to an ED for years. Coming out of the ED I did a 180 and used food to deal with stress. I’m at a weight I’ve dreamed of for over a decade.
SW: 94 kgs CW: 70-73kg (I keep fluctuating) GW: 65kg height 5’7
Started back in Dec 2022 I’ve been in a plateau for months now and my Dr has now bumped me up to 15mg (just took the 1st dose today) I stayed on 5mg for 5 months and 7.5mg for another few months.
I think it’s time to really kick my butt into gear and focus more on exercise and counting calories or at least keeping track of what I eat. I am so close to my goal but truthfully my original goal was 73 and I am here. So as much as I am frustrated and feel like I am failing, I decided to make a before and after to remind myself just how far I’ve come and to hopefully inspire anyone stuck in a plateau that we can get through this 🙌🏼
submitted by DoAnythingBeExtra to Mounjaro [link] [comments]
SW: 94 kgs CW: 70-73kg (I keep fluctuating) GW: 65kg height 5’7
Started back in Dec 2022 I’ve been in a plateau for months now and my Dr has now bumped me up to 15mg (just took the 1st dose today) I stayed on 5mg for 5 months and 7.5mg for another few months.
I think it’s time to really kick my butt into gear and focus more on exercise and counting calories or at least keeping track of what I eat. I am so close to my goal but truthfully my original goal was 73 and I am here. So as much as I am frustrated and feel like I am failing, I decided to make a before and after to remind myself just how far I’ve come and to hopefully inspire anyone stuck in a plateau that we can get through this 🙌🏼
2024.05.21 23:43 Brilliant-Lychee-518 Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic
What is Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic?
Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic is a weight loss supplement. Its formula contains an optimal combination of natural ingredients, plant extracts and herbs that work together to benefit your overall health.This formula targets the root cause of the weight gain problem and helps users improve their metabolism and lose weight quickly.
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Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic uses a meticulously crafted tropical formula to promote weight loss and improve overall health. Its ingredients target the root causes of unexplained weight gain, including blue light exposure and non-REM sleep disorders. They boost metabolism and encourage fat burning, helping you achieve your dream body.
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The creators of this formula claim that you can continue to eat your favourite foods, avoid counting calories, and avoid strenuous exercise – all while losing weight.
Sumatra Tonic testimonials also allude to how users use the Sumatra oral powder formula to support healthy blood sugar and blood pressure levels.
It would help if you were sceptical whenever a nutritional supplement claims to lead to significant weight loss without much effort or dieting. Asking whether the Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic scam is real makes it interesting whether this is a fake weight loss supplement or a legitimate food.
Many Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic reviews by users are a satisfied chorus, praising this tonic for helping them achieve their weight loss goals naturally and organically. This is unlike other weight loss products that can often lead to health complications if not used properly or long-term. Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic is made from a powerful blend of eight meticulously selected natural ingredients that help stimulate fat burning, improve sleep quality and boost overall energy levels.
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This formula is a fat-burning product that works from the inside out to help users address the root cause of weight gain. Even while sleeping, you can still lose a few pounds because your metabolism will be activated. Sumatra Tonic contains several weight-loss ingredients that enhance the body’s ability to burn excess fat and calories, helping with weight loss.In a world where weight loss supplements and solutions are plentiful, Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic is a breakthrough solution promoting a sustainable and healthy lifestyle. It’s a tropical formula meticulously crafted to protect natural health and wellness, boost energy, promote restful sleep, limit inflammation and brighten skin.
The unique blend of tonic ingredients has proven to have a transformational effect on many users, allowing them to achieve visible results quickly.
Sumatra supplements stimulate your metabolism and encourage fat burning to achieve weight loss results. It also helps you build lean muscle mass, a key component in healthy weight control. It contains a powerful blend of ingredients, including Humulus lupulus and black cohosh. These plants have been used for years to relieve menopausal symptoms in women. At the same time, hibiscus reduces cravings for junk food and promotes a calorie deficit.
Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic also nourishes your skin from within, resulting in brighter and healthier skin. It includes lutein, a natural vitamin A form that protects against harmful high-energy light waves such as UV rays and promotes cell repair.
The prebiotic fibre, inulin, promotes a healthy gut microbiome and provides the nutrients your skin needs to look radiant and bright.
Chronic inflammation is a leading cause of weight gain and various health conditions. Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic contains ingredients such as berberine and lutein that support a healthy inflammatory response. This helps prevent toxic fat buildup and protects the body’s major organs from damage.
The formula of Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic also includes ingredients known for their anti-inflammatory properties and may improve sleep. Additionally, this herb promotes balanced hormone levels and healthy menopausal symptoms in women.
The unique blend of organic ingredients in Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic works in tandem to promote a healthier, more balanced lifestyle. Users regularly report increased energy levels and a renewed sense of vitality, helping them tackle daily tasks and assignments more efficiently and consistently. Many people also report improved sleep quality, allowing them to wake up refreshed and energized.
What Are The Ingredients of Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic?
You can quickly notice excellent results in just 21 days that support healthy weight loss with a combination of five potent plant extracts. And here is the detailed list of Sumatra Slim Belly Tonic:- Valerian Root: Actinidine and other valerian alkaloids have been proven to be soothing. The sedative and overall soothing effects of valerian are a result of these alkaloids. Valerian unintentionally aids in weight loss by encouraging improved sleep hygiene.
- Humulus lupulus: It has been said to have diuretic, digestive, sedative, anti-inflammatory, and antibacterial qualities. It has even been suggested as a treatment for insomnia.
- Griffonia simplicifolia or 5-HTP: The natives use its dried rind as a preservative and flavouring, saying that eating a small amount of this fruit makes them whole. It blocks the action of an enzyme called citrate lyase, suppressing your appetite. It increases the production of glycogen, which tells your brain that you are full.
- Berberine: The antibacterial and anti-inflammatory effects of berberine support healthy gut flora and lessen digestive system inflammation. It helps people shed extra weight, reduce excessive blood sugar, and reduce high cholesterol. Berberine effectively burns fat because of its ability to activate AMPK pathways, also known as the metabolic master switch.
- Spirulina Blue is an antioxidant and nutrient-rich blue-green alga known for fighting free radicals and inflammation.
- Black Cohosh: Black cohosh is a buttercup family member that mainly has estrogen-like properties. According to studies, black cohosh helps menopausal women feel more energized, regulate their mood and body temperature, promote restful sleep, increase libido, and more.
- Lutein: Lutein is a type of naturally occurring yellow pigment known as a carotenoid found in significant quantities in several fruits and vegetables. Lutein is a nutrient humans can take and metabolize into beneficial forms that protect the eye cells from oxidative damage.
- Inulin is a prebiotic power-up that boosts digestion goals, immune strength, and heart health vibes.
- L-Citrulline: L-Citrulline has been studied carefully lately, and research states that it can increase the blood flow to the penis. It widens the blood pathways and allows more oxygen-rich, nitric oxide-rich and nutrient-rich blood to be retained in your penis. This helps relieve mild ED and its symptoms immediately. It can also treat severe ED in the long term.
- Vitamin C: Vitamin C works as an antioxidant to reduce the toxins in the body and remove any chemicals or unwanted matter stuck in your arteries, capillaries and blood pathways. Vitamin C is often linked with reducing inflammation, which is also a considerable cause of ED and poor sexual performance in older men. It supports penile chambers’ health and nourishes your manhood.
- L-Proline: When combined with vitamins, this amino acid is often used to reverse the clocks of ageing and its symptoms in men. When consumed in the correct dosage, L-Proline helps reduce your symptoms of ED, BPH, and other sexual disorders or ailments naturally. It helps the vitamins and minerals get absorbed and works well for your penile health regardless of your age and health conditions.
- COQ10: Its supplementation reduces oxidative stress and free radical damage to your manhood. The most common cause of ED is claimed to be oxidative stress, and COQ10 helps reduce and obliterate it. It prevents toxins from damaging and reducing the nourishment of your penile chambers. It helps other amino acids nourish you.
- Pine Bark Extract: It helps improve sperm concentration and makes you virile. It doesn’t matter how old you are; when taken in the right amount and with the right ingredients, Pine Bark Extract supports your endothelium, which protects your sexual health. It reduces inflammation and supports your erectile muscles and their functions. It helps you hold your erections for as long as you want.
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2024.05.21 23:41 behindthevision Am I doing the right thing?
Hi all, I'm currently 29% BF, 5"11. 86KG
I'm skinny fat at the minute, I barely have an muscle on me.
I've found the article "12 Week Fat Destoyer" by Muscle and Strength and I've changed my calories/food and eat super healthy, I work out (From that plan) and eat like that plan.
I'm doing a cycle between 2300-2700 calories and dropping it by 100 weekly. I'm hitting 180/200g of protien a day and mainly eating chicken,turkey and protein bars.
I'm also taking Creatine and BCAA.
Am I doing the right thing? The article barely has much cardio in and I keep wondering if I should start doing more to get the weight down faster?
Is there anything I could be doing better? My long term goal is to lose weight and gain muscle/definition.
submitted by behindthevision to askfitness [link] [comments]
I'm skinny fat at the minute, I barely have an muscle on me.
I've found the article "12 Week Fat Destoyer" by Muscle and Strength and I've changed my calories/food and eat super healthy, I work out (From that plan) and eat like that plan.
I'm doing a cycle between 2300-2700 calories and dropping it by 100 weekly. I'm hitting 180/200g of protien a day and mainly eating chicken,turkey and protein bars.
I'm also taking Creatine and BCAA.
Am I doing the right thing? The article barely has much cardio in and I keep wondering if I should start doing more to get the weight down faster?
Is there anything I could be doing better? My long term goal is to lose weight and gain muscle/definition.
2024.05.21 23:38 Personal_Section_800 pls help me gain weight
5 foot 7 and 120 pounds. i need a lot of help gaining weight. my goal is to get to at least 135 pounds but no matter how much i eat i cant gain weight. i am built like a no.2 pencil and tomorrow is the last day of school so i will actually have some free time to lift. im tryna build my back/chest. i am also tryna to hit at least 3.5k calories a day and 150 plus grams of protein a day. can anyone recommend me tips/foods/ workouts to help me out?
submitted by Personal_Section_800 to Bulk [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 23:24 PWOFalcon As Astra Volume 0, Prolog, Chapter 1, part 2
Part 1: https://www.reddit.com/HFY/comments/1cxj7h8/comment/l52vtd5/?context=3
*****
The Palatini of Orias journey took nine grueling days of traveling down the peaks of Torness Mountain Range. But at long last, they reached the Coralus Valley. While the temperature was far below what the half-elf usually enjoyed, it was far better than the mountain peaks.
They traveled through the valley, trying to avoid the multiple hostiles, villages, and anyone else who could tip off their enemies. They had to take every tedious path imaginable to prevent possible contact with the enemy.
Staring at their destination, Fraeya Holiadon could not decide if she should be thrilled or distorted at the sight. "Is this the place?"
"I believe so," Raegel said. "The pattern of the structures matches my drawings and the map. See the remains of the two walls?"
"And the stone rings that direct out," Henness said.
"So, you have read the legends," Raegel said, surprised by the centurion's knowledge of the temple.
"I always prepare before a mission," Henness said. "Those half rings, are they stone or artificial?"
"They look like stone, so I think they used the ground stone and molded them," Raegel said.
Fraeya Holiadon carefully stared at the temple ruins. All she could see was the destruction—fractured stone buildings, walls, weed-infested stone pavement, and so on. While there were still many stone structures, most were destroyed. She could only see death, not the walls her father could see.
She turned to ask her father what he was talking about but saw Centurion Fionntan Henness pointing toward the walls and other details.
Watching the two communicate about the features of the temple, she realized how out of depth she was. Her father spent generations studying ruins like this, while Henness is an experienced soldier. For Fraeya, this was her first mission outside the academy supervision, and she realized how different the world was compared to the classroom.
As the two spoke, her elf ears overheard Henness mention that he saw green webbing. As the two men debated what creatures could create that webbing, she already knew based on the type of webbing. Being an excellent student, she recalled the topic regarding intelligent monsters. While many species produce a web, only one creates a thick green. Goblins.
"Father," Fraeya said. "I think goblins made those webbings."
"How could you possibly know that?" Henness asked, unconvinced by the theory. "It would easily be Rorgo or a Kipt."
Fraeya reached into her backpack and pulled out her notepad. She flipped through the pages and responded, "Kipt is more silk-like, while Rorgo is more for capturing prey. Both are white. Only Goblins make green."
"She is correct," Raegel said. "The green should have been a given."
"Alright," Henness said. "That complicates things."
"How so?" Fraeya asked. "The academy said they are weak. Adventures and local militia kill them constantly, so your men should be able to wipe them out with your weaponry easily."
"Goblins are weak in small numbers, but they are a nightmare in large numbers," Henness said. "And depending on the horde, they adapt to who their enemies are quickly. For all I know, we could be fighting a nest that is as heavily armed as we are."
Fraeya looked back toward the next with much confusion. She knew about the goblin's ability to adapt. However, her teachers never stated how formal they could be. Only treating them as barbarians is a functional civilization. "I would think the academy would mention something like that."
"If you are going to be out here in the world, you must understand that life is very different from the classroom," Henness said. "The difference between someone who lives behind a desk versus someone on the ground. Now, I need to get my forces ready for our attack."
Once the centurion left, Fraeya looked at her father. "I am starting to get the impression that my schooling wasn't as truthful as I once thought."
Raegel chuckled at the statement from his daughter. "That is what I said when I left my academy in Thali'ean," he said with a short chuckle before he spoke. "Henness was correct; there is a large gap between the classroom and out here in the world."
"I see. So, now, what do we do?"
"We wait for the legionaries to form a plan. Because time is not on our side, he will want you to assist with your magic. Do you think you can assist? If you are uncomfortable, tell me now, and you can stay here where it is safe."
Feeling a nervous chill creeping down her spine, she looked back toward the temple and breathed heavily. "I admit, I am scared, but I didn't come here to babysit the camp. I want to help."
She felt her father pat her on the back, feeling a sense of pride from his touch.
"That's my daughter."
After an hour of planning, the Palatini of Orias began their assault on the temple ruins. The plan was for a primary team to assault the temple directly, triggering a response from the goblin. The second team would remain on the high ground and pick off the horde.
Fraeya ended up on the right side of the group team. To her surprise, many soldiers were thrilled that they were finally getting into a fight. She wondered, after two weeks of crawling over the mountains and hiding like rodents, they finally got a chance to be soldiers.
The primary assault group she was attached to advance toward the temple once the signal was given. Passing one of the few remaining wall structures, they entered the temple ground. As they swept through the old temple's front sections, the goblins huddled around a fire pit, noticed them, and prepared for battle.
Three legionaries known as circilmen, from the palatini positioned themselves to engage the incoming enemy. Carrying a ranged projectile weapon known as a circiletum, they hid behind the front shield men and fired upon the incoming enemy. They picked off two of the three goblins as the last one quickly crawled under a piece of rubble for cover. Then, the palatini heard a painful screech from the hiding goblin.
Fraeya couldn't help herself but stand there noticing the two fresh corpses. She then watched as two of the swordsmen rushed to the hiding goblin. They reached in and pulled the little green monster out of its hiding spot.
Two swordsmen grabbed the goblin and dragged it from its cover, it jumped on top of one of the legionaries, stabbing its blade into its armor, unable to break through. With a short struggle, the legionary could slam the goblin onto the ground. The other legionary stomped on the body before thrusting his gladius into the monster.
Hearing another screech, Fraeya looked down the stone path and saw goblins popping out of every crack and corner.
One of the legionary officers ordered the unit to reform. The swordsmen took the front with their large scutum shields, creating a two-line protective shield wall. Behind them were the circilmen, taking cover behind the scutum.
The group of goblins charged forward. As they approached, the legionaries saw the raw, starving rage within their dark green eyes—a thirst for primal instincts of food and lust and nothing else.
"Fraeya, is it?"
Hearing her name, she turned to the commanding offer of this group.
"When I give the order, shake the ground." The lower-ranking Centurian said.
Fraeya acknowledged the order as she understood what he was planning.
Turning back to the incoming horde, she watched the three circilmen open fire. The circiletums cut down the forward group of goblins. The ones behind that row suddenly stopped from the shock but were cut down by a second volley.
"Now. Before they scatter."
Fraeya placed her hands together and chanted. The two tiny mana crystals on her gloves blew green as she felt a raw energy channel through her body. A moment later, that glow expanded to the point that it encompassed her hand.
Channeling the mana needed for the spell, Fraeya placed her left hand on the ground.
The stone ground beneath them shook the stone terra, stunning the goblins. Right down the center, cracks formed, and the terra broke apart. The road slightly uplifted into an elevation, forcing the goblins to focus on what was happening.
With the ground disinformed, it prevented the enemy from scattering in an organized manner, allowing the circilmen to fire another volley.
The front scutum marched forward and started cutting down anything that moved. The other line split into two groups. They were marching down the street in an almost synchronized manner. They held their shields high toward the ruins, protecting the circilmen from any incoming projectile. Arrows and magic.
Fireballs flew and impacted the scutum infantry, protecting the flanks. Some of the shields glowed from the impact. The flames engulfed one of the men's arms, and he started to scream from the pain.
The circilmen returned fire, and a firefight began. The sound of their weapons crackled throughout the surrounding area, amplified by the ruined walls. Above the sound of battle were the voices and cries of the wounded—the circiletum that were deployed on the ridge above rained fire from the suppressive team.
The Palatini of Orias pushed deeper into the temple ground as the battle continued. That was until the town began to be consumed by this thick haze, providing cover for the goblins, and restricting visibility for the Lat forces. While not educated to the standards of civilized races, Goblins were not stupid.
"It is a haze," Fraeya said. "They must have a mage somewhere within the nest."
Centurion Fionntan Henness approached their forces and began to regroup. "Can you counter it?"
"No," Fraeya replied. "I never studied Aeromancy magic."
"Nebulo," Henness said. "Our armor and weapons will be less effective."
Fraeya understood his concern. From what she recalled from her classes; goblins have sharp senses. Based on the density of the haze, it was clear even to her that they were planning to force them to huddle and expose themselves to be surrounded, making their ranged weapons worthless.
"We will just have to work around it," Raegel said.
As Frayea prepared herself, she felt a strange feeling throughout her body, almost like some field affecting her body. She saw a female legionary in light armor and a cloak checking over the wounded. One of the few women in the legionary, she could tell she was the unit healer specializing in Sanamancy magic. The women must have placed a barrier to help protect against any poisonous gasses lying within the haze.
Orias advanced through the haze; this forced the soldiers to clump together for safety. As the assault group progressed, they were hit non-stop by the goblin's arrow fire, spears, and fire shots from sling guns. Most of these projectiles caused minor damage thanks to the heavy armor legionary’s wear. However, this did not remove the damage as it brought discomfort and limited their progression to a crawl.
Barely noticing two figures on top of a rooftop through the haze, who were firing slingshots toward their position, she pointed her hand toward a piece of rubble and, with her magic, lifted the debris and projected it through the haze. The rubble temporarily formed a gap in the haze that increased the line-of-sight.
She then called out to the fire battle mage within the unit. The mage realized what was happening and fired multiple firebolts toward the tower. Five bolts impacted the building from different directions, engulfing the structure in flames. Everyone could hear the faint sound of goblins screaming as the building burnt.
With the tower collapsing suddenly, arrows rained through the thick haze, hitting the legionaries in retaliation. While most arrows bounced off the armor, some found exposed spots. Two more legionaries fell to their knees, with one vomiting blood, forcing the healed to focus on the sick over protecting the group.
It became clear that the goblins changed their tactics and poisoned their arrows. While worthless against armor, they could still puncture the underneath clothing and scrap any exposed part of the skin.
A luperca legionnaire picked up an old broken wagon and used it as a shield to protect. With the cover, the lower ranking commanders directed the circilmen to pick off any goblins that peaked above the surface.
Combined with the haze and change of tactic, this formed a strange stalemate between the two sides. The Orias was forced into a defensive; they were well equipped to deal with any goblins who dared to get within melee range. However, the goblins had surrounded and had the range advance as they could see through the haze, allowing them to snipe any legionary who adventured far from the group.
Fraeya saw a blob of acid impact a swordsmen's scutum. The scutum started being consumed by the spell, slowly falling into pieces. The man screamed as he felt his arm burn, desperately untieing the strappings to ditch the heavy shield.
"We need to kill their shaman before we are picked off," Raegel said.
"I agreed," Henness replied. "As long as this haze is here, my suppressive team is useless."
"If I recall," Fraeya said. "A Shaman should be nearby. Someone close enough to maintain this haze and give commands but not put themselves in danger."
"Then I know where it should be," Henness said. "Let's go half-elf."
She felt her ears perk up once she realized the centurion was talking about her. She looked toward her father and saw the 'it is time to prove yourself' look. Taking a deep breath and preparing herself, she gathered behind Henness and six of his men.
The assault unit left the main one and adventurer deeper into the temple grounds. As they reached what remained of an intersection, goblins stormed out of the stone buildings to ambush the legionaries.
With their disciplined reaction, the legionaries immediately adjusted their formation and sliced down the attackers. Henness stood at the center, holding his sword out as flames wrapped around the blade.
As the goblins attacked the swordsmen, Fraeya broke apart the ground on the right flank, knocking many goblins. The one that fell, she entangled them by summoning vines - which trapped the goblins and pulled them into the ground until their death or burial.
She then turned and lifted parts of the ground on the left flank, blocking some of the goblins. This prevented the legionaries from being encircled.
"Reform," Henness ordered. "We need to advance quickly. Stay close."
Once the path was clear, the unit moved toward the building where the goblins had fortified. Henness moved in front of her to provide protection. He held up his shield, deflecting arrows.
"Stay behind me," Henness said.
While not being a military woman, Fraeya quickly learned to accept the chain of command on this quest. On the battlefield, her father told her to listen to Henness as he was a man of war. She realized that the structure and safety of the city and the academy are vastly different in the countryside. Getting behind him, she followed him close behind as he pushed forward, arrows striking his shield, allowing her to get in range for her spell.
The legionaries stopped engaging the incoming goblins, allowing their centurion and the young mage to get closer. Henness reached around his scutum and pressed the amulet attached to the outer shell's center. Once pressed, the large shield briefly glowed before darkening, returning to the standard red with white lining design.
Up ahead, Fraeya saw in full display of the nest. Spikes, fortification, and green webbing filled the gaps between the ruined structures. Skeletons and decomposing bodies littered the areas of their past victims. The goblins were standing in the bunker sections, preparing for battle. With how heavily guarded it was, she concluded that this must be where the Shaman was.
"Fraeya, now!"
Fraeya moved around the man to cast her spell. With a quick chant, her hands glowed green again. As she channeled her mana, an acid attack impacted Henness' scutum. While the added hardening enchantment from the amulet increased the scutum resistance, the acid slowly ate through the large shield.
Stepping from cover, Fraeya aimed her hands at the nest. The ground trembled a little as the front of the nest collapsed on itself from the summoned sinkhole.
With the front entrance open, Fraeya saw the Shaman in plain view—a female, being one of the few within a goblin nest. The Shama looked scared as she looked around where to hide.
Fraeya did not give it time as she cast a spell that created a spike from the ground below the Shaman and pierced straight through the vicious monster, killing it instantly.
As the Shaman staff hit the ground, the haze started to disappear.
Believing that her work was complete after killing the goblin leader, her ears quickly heard footsteps surrounding them.
Noticing that the goblins were about to swarm their position, she took cover behind Henness to protect his rear. She took a deep breath as she felt exhausted from the battle and cast so many spells quickly.
Starting at five goblins that emerged from the ruins, Fraeya watched as they charged toward them. Before they got close, however, each one was sniped from the ridge-side suppressive team.
With a moment of confusion, she stared toward the cliffside and saw the suppressive team. Now that the haze is disappearing, they could snipe off the remaining goblins from their elevation position.
"Good job, half-elf," Henness said, slowly stepping back with a shield aimed at the flames, guiding Fraeya back.
"Stop calling me half-elf," Fraeya yelled. "I am out here risking my life with the rest of you, and don't give me that war is a male-domain thing! I am willing to see this through. Most of my kind would stay home and let you fight, so why do you keep degrading me?"
"Because ideals get people killed," Fionntan Henness replied. "Out here, you must earn that respect within the brotherhood of warriors, especially if you are used to living inside the city walls. People with a self-protected mindset usually end up as food for the worms or get my soldiers killed because they do not understand what it takes to survive."
The centurion then turned to the destroyed nest. "I will say, though, what you did here. It is a good first step for a half-elf." He then turned to give her an approving smile.
Not understanding the humor from the Lat, Fraeya accepted it. From her experience, Lats always had a strange sense of humor. Insults are sometimes seen as compliments while praising could be considered offensive. Saying one thing but meaning another is a common trait for them.
With the remaining palatini coming after clearing the remaining goblins, Fraeya saw her father. She rushed over and hugged him and teared up.
"You did good, my dear," Raegel said as he patted her.
"Is this really what it is like out here?" Fraeya asked.
"Sadly, it is," Fraeya replied. "That is why I never brought you around on my digs."
"I am sorry to interrupt," Henness said. "We are on borrowed time, so can we get at it?"
Fraeya looked toward the centurion with frustration as she wanted a moment with her father. After taking a deep breath, she realized that he was right.
After finishing her hug, she brushed off the goblin's blood and clothing.
"Then we better begin searching for what we came for," Raegel said as he reached for his bag. She watched as he pulled out a perfectly smoothed, pure black orb. By itself, it didn't look impressive. She had seen hundreds of these orbs at the academy or the many workshops within the city.
Raegel held the orb in one hand and activated it with his mana. The orb glowed light blue and fainted, barely emitting any energy. He then took it against the mountain and began scanning.
Not wanting to miss anything, Fraeya quickly pulled out her journal, skipping past all her notes until she reached a blank page. She then began documenting everything her father did, taking in every world and detail.
The palatini began walking through the ruins, heading toward the mountain wall. Raegel explained in his research that the temple extended inside the mountain, like a dwarf borrian. While others who came before him came up with this theory, they were still looking for a way to detect the hidden door markings and find it.
Raegel moved down the side of the mountain, holding the orb high.
"Why are you not using a door-detecting amulet?" Fraeya asked.
"Because people have been using that for generations and found nothing here," Raegel replied.
After a reasonable amount of time when nothing had happened, Fraeya began to wonder if everything was for nothing. Seeing the lack of progress, Henness inquired if the orb failed to work. As Raegel replied, the orb suddenly blimped orange for a moment.
Witnessing the sudden change, the group backed away as they did not know how to respond to the sudden glow.
Noticing a renewed excitement from her father, she followed him closely as they investigated the mountainside.
As they searched, her father noticed that the faint blue glow from the orb had changed to orange. It then disappeared and slowly appeared, like it was slowly pulsing. When they continued walking forward, the pulsing light increased in speed.
"I think it is directing us, father," Fraeya said.
"Possible," Raegel said. "There must be some type of link."
The palatini followed the direction the orb gave. As the group approached a mountainside wall, the pulse frequency increased until it looked like the orb glowed a solid color.
"I think we found it," Raegel said. He lifted the orb toward the wall.
As the orb drew closer to the mountainside, these blue lines appeared all over the rocky wall. The rough chips of rock melted away and turned smooth as the light traveled through the grooves, slowly creating what looked like a giant door of light.
Once the bright lights finished designing a massive door, Fraeya placed her hand on the wall, shocked at how the natural bulky rocks turned into a marble-like wall.
"I would step aside, Fraeya," Raegel said.
As Fraeya stepped backward, she watched her father open the door with a magical spell. Like most magical doors, the door brightened as she expected it would fold into the mountain. To her surprise, the door didn't fold away but melted into the ground.
"What happened to the door?" Fraeya asked.
Raegal placed his hand on his chin. "It seemed that the wall was not solid but some liquid matter. These people are impressive."
The wall began to shake as dusk from the cracks spread through the area.
A large opening formed as the door walls folded into the mountainside. A passage leading deeper into the mountain. The walls were black and smooth, while the floor had these textiles in perfect order, leading deeper into the mountain.
"This has to be a dwarven design," Fraeya commented. "Only they could do something like this."
"I'm not sure," Raegel said. "This is not a design I have seen from dwarves."
Fraeya understood what her father meant. Dwarven doors into the mountains took a lot of work to find. While there were many designs of such hidden doors and the means to open them, it was doubtful that anyone had ever seen a secret magical door like this before.
Raegel started to walk into the chamber but was suddenly stopped by Henness. Stating that he wanted his men to go first to ensure no trap, three legionaries moved through the large chamber. Once they gave the clear, the rest of the group entered.
While walking, Fraeya stayed close to her father as she took notes. The soldiers ahead of them set up torches to add more light. To her surprise, the walls and floor were smooth. The air was stale, probably trapped within this chamber for centuries.
As they walked inside, the room lit up. Everyone stopped as they looked toward the end of the hall. The chamber was empty, with only a strange-looking platform at the very end. Noticing that the orb was pointing toward the platform, they approached it.
"Is this it?" Henness asked. "It does not look that impressive."
"Not everything is based on size, centurion," Raegel replied, to which his daughter giggled.
Fraeya then analyzed the platform. It was smooth, almost marble-like. However, she doubted whether it was marble. The fundamental details that she noticed were a strange-looking blue crystal at the center of the platform and another in a hole on the side.
"This is interesting," Fraeya commented. The design looked surprisingly simple. This orb must act as some command orb for this device. They must be communicating in some manner."
"Assuming that the legend was true, the orcs were the ones who summoned the lats from Altaerrie," Fraeya said. "Maybe, when this place was lost of that time, it was never turned off. Being left in a state of slumber, waiting to be reawakened."
"Possible. It would explain why the orb directed us here. The orange pulse is now pointing down at a rapid pace."
"I think it goes into that hole, father," Fraeya said. "From what I can tell, the crystal in there connects to the one on top of the platform."
"I see," Raegel said. "The pulse is pointing toward it too. I recommend that everyone step back."
"Be careful, father," Fraeya said.
Stepping back from the platform, Fraeya watched as her father placed the orb into the hole. This was the moment her father had been talking about for decades, and it had finally come true. The Bridge between two worlds had finally been discovered.
As Raegel placed the orb into the platform, it glowed orange in a solid state, no longer pulsing. The blue crystal in the middle of the platform slowly lit up, like it was waking up after a long sleep.
The air suddenly chilled as the air flowed toward the platform. A bright light beamed out of the crystal and slowly faded away, leaving a light as if on standby.
To their dismay, the orb changed to red, dimming and brightening in a slow, tired pattern.
"What is it doing, father?" Fraeya asked.
"I have no idea," Raegel replied. "It must be waiting for something."
submitted by PWOFalcon to HFY [link] [comments]
*****
The Palatini of Orias journey took nine grueling days of traveling down the peaks of Torness Mountain Range. But at long last, they reached the Coralus Valley. While the temperature was far below what the half-elf usually enjoyed, it was far better than the mountain peaks.
They traveled through the valley, trying to avoid the multiple hostiles, villages, and anyone else who could tip off their enemies. They had to take every tedious path imaginable to prevent possible contact with the enemy.
Staring at their destination, Fraeya Holiadon could not decide if she should be thrilled or distorted at the sight. "Is this the place?"
"I believe so," Raegel said. "The pattern of the structures matches my drawings and the map. See the remains of the two walls?"
"And the stone rings that direct out," Henness said.
"So, you have read the legends," Raegel said, surprised by the centurion's knowledge of the temple.
"I always prepare before a mission," Henness said. "Those half rings, are they stone or artificial?"
"They look like stone, so I think they used the ground stone and molded them," Raegel said.
Fraeya Holiadon carefully stared at the temple ruins. All she could see was the destruction—fractured stone buildings, walls, weed-infested stone pavement, and so on. While there were still many stone structures, most were destroyed. She could only see death, not the walls her father could see.
She turned to ask her father what he was talking about but saw Centurion Fionntan Henness pointing toward the walls and other details.
Watching the two communicate about the features of the temple, she realized how out of depth she was. Her father spent generations studying ruins like this, while Henness is an experienced soldier. For Fraeya, this was her first mission outside the academy supervision, and she realized how different the world was compared to the classroom.
As the two spoke, her elf ears overheard Henness mention that he saw green webbing. As the two men debated what creatures could create that webbing, she already knew based on the type of webbing. Being an excellent student, she recalled the topic regarding intelligent monsters. While many species produce a web, only one creates a thick green. Goblins.
"Father," Fraeya said. "I think goblins made those webbings."
"How could you possibly know that?" Henness asked, unconvinced by the theory. "It would easily be Rorgo or a Kipt."
Fraeya reached into her backpack and pulled out her notepad. She flipped through the pages and responded, "Kipt is more silk-like, while Rorgo is more for capturing prey. Both are white. Only Goblins make green."
"She is correct," Raegel said. "The green should have been a given."
"Alright," Henness said. "That complicates things."
"How so?" Fraeya asked. "The academy said they are weak. Adventures and local militia kill them constantly, so your men should be able to wipe them out with your weaponry easily."
"Goblins are weak in small numbers, but they are a nightmare in large numbers," Henness said. "And depending on the horde, they adapt to who their enemies are quickly. For all I know, we could be fighting a nest that is as heavily armed as we are."
Fraeya looked back toward the next with much confusion. She knew about the goblin's ability to adapt. However, her teachers never stated how formal they could be. Only treating them as barbarians is a functional civilization. "I would think the academy would mention something like that."
"If you are going to be out here in the world, you must understand that life is very different from the classroom," Henness said. "The difference between someone who lives behind a desk versus someone on the ground. Now, I need to get my forces ready for our attack."
Once the centurion left, Fraeya looked at her father. "I am starting to get the impression that my schooling wasn't as truthful as I once thought."
Raegel chuckled at the statement from his daughter. "That is what I said when I left my academy in Thali'ean," he said with a short chuckle before he spoke. "Henness was correct; there is a large gap between the classroom and out here in the world."
"I see. So, now, what do we do?"
"We wait for the legionaries to form a plan. Because time is not on our side, he will want you to assist with your magic. Do you think you can assist? If you are uncomfortable, tell me now, and you can stay here where it is safe."
Feeling a nervous chill creeping down her spine, she looked back toward the temple and breathed heavily. "I admit, I am scared, but I didn't come here to babysit the camp. I want to help."
She felt her father pat her on the back, feeling a sense of pride from his touch.
"That's my daughter."
After an hour of planning, the Palatini of Orias began their assault on the temple ruins. The plan was for a primary team to assault the temple directly, triggering a response from the goblin. The second team would remain on the high ground and pick off the horde.
Fraeya ended up on the right side of the group team. To her surprise, many soldiers were thrilled that they were finally getting into a fight. She wondered, after two weeks of crawling over the mountains and hiding like rodents, they finally got a chance to be soldiers.
The primary assault group she was attached to advance toward the temple once the signal was given. Passing one of the few remaining wall structures, they entered the temple ground. As they swept through the old temple's front sections, the goblins huddled around a fire pit, noticed them, and prepared for battle.
Three legionaries known as circilmen, from the palatini positioned themselves to engage the incoming enemy. Carrying a ranged projectile weapon known as a circiletum, they hid behind the front shield men and fired upon the incoming enemy. They picked off two of the three goblins as the last one quickly crawled under a piece of rubble for cover. Then, the palatini heard a painful screech from the hiding goblin.
Fraeya couldn't help herself but stand there noticing the two fresh corpses. She then watched as two of the swordsmen rushed to the hiding goblin. They reached in and pulled the little green monster out of its hiding spot.
Two swordsmen grabbed the goblin and dragged it from its cover, it jumped on top of one of the legionaries, stabbing its blade into its armor, unable to break through. With a short struggle, the legionary could slam the goblin onto the ground. The other legionary stomped on the body before thrusting his gladius into the monster.
Hearing another screech, Fraeya looked down the stone path and saw goblins popping out of every crack and corner.
One of the legionary officers ordered the unit to reform. The swordsmen took the front with their large scutum shields, creating a two-line protective shield wall. Behind them were the circilmen, taking cover behind the scutum.
The group of goblins charged forward. As they approached, the legionaries saw the raw, starving rage within their dark green eyes—a thirst for primal instincts of food and lust and nothing else.
"Fraeya, is it?"
Hearing her name, she turned to the commanding offer of this group.
"When I give the order, shake the ground." The lower-ranking Centurian said.
Fraeya acknowledged the order as she understood what he was planning.
Turning back to the incoming horde, she watched the three circilmen open fire. The circiletums cut down the forward group of goblins. The ones behind that row suddenly stopped from the shock but were cut down by a second volley.
"Now. Before they scatter."
Fraeya placed her hands together and chanted. The two tiny mana crystals on her gloves blew green as she felt a raw energy channel through her body. A moment later, that glow expanded to the point that it encompassed her hand.
Channeling the mana needed for the spell, Fraeya placed her left hand on the ground.
The stone ground beneath them shook the stone terra, stunning the goblins. Right down the center, cracks formed, and the terra broke apart. The road slightly uplifted into an elevation, forcing the goblins to focus on what was happening.
With the ground disinformed, it prevented the enemy from scattering in an organized manner, allowing the circilmen to fire another volley.
The front scutum marched forward and started cutting down anything that moved. The other line split into two groups. They were marching down the street in an almost synchronized manner. They held their shields high toward the ruins, protecting the circilmen from any incoming projectile. Arrows and magic.
Fireballs flew and impacted the scutum infantry, protecting the flanks. Some of the shields glowed from the impact. The flames engulfed one of the men's arms, and he started to scream from the pain.
The circilmen returned fire, and a firefight began. The sound of their weapons crackled throughout the surrounding area, amplified by the ruined walls. Above the sound of battle were the voices and cries of the wounded—the circiletum that were deployed on the ridge above rained fire from the suppressive team.
The Palatini of Orias pushed deeper into the temple ground as the battle continued. That was until the town began to be consumed by this thick haze, providing cover for the goblins, and restricting visibility for the Lat forces. While not educated to the standards of civilized races, Goblins were not stupid.
"It is a haze," Fraeya said. "They must have a mage somewhere within the nest."
Centurion Fionntan Henness approached their forces and began to regroup. "Can you counter it?"
"No," Fraeya replied. "I never studied Aeromancy magic."
"Nebulo," Henness said. "Our armor and weapons will be less effective."
Fraeya understood his concern. From what she recalled from her classes; goblins have sharp senses. Based on the density of the haze, it was clear even to her that they were planning to force them to huddle and expose themselves to be surrounded, making their ranged weapons worthless.
"We will just have to work around it," Raegel said.
As Frayea prepared herself, she felt a strange feeling throughout her body, almost like some field affecting her body. She saw a female legionary in light armor and a cloak checking over the wounded. One of the few women in the legionary, she could tell she was the unit healer specializing in Sanamancy magic. The women must have placed a barrier to help protect against any poisonous gasses lying within the haze.
Orias advanced through the haze; this forced the soldiers to clump together for safety. As the assault group progressed, they were hit non-stop by the goblin's arrow fire, spears, and fire shots from sling guns. Most of these projectiles caused minor damage thanks to the heavy armor legionary’s wear. However, this did not remove the damage as it brought discomfort and limited their progression to a crawl.
Barely noticing two figures on top of a rooftop through the haze, who were firing slingshots toward their position, she pointed her hand toward a piece of rubble and, with her magic, lifted the debris and projected it through the haze. The rubble temporarily formed a gap in the haze that increased the line-of-sight.
She then called out to the fire battle mage within the unit. The mage realized what was happening and fired multiple firebolts toward the tower. Five bolts impacted the building from different directions, engulfing the structure in flames. Everyone could hear the faint sound of goblins screaming as the building burnt.
With the tower collapsing suddenly, arrows rained through the thick haze, hitting the legionaries in retaliation. While most arrows bounced off the armor, some found exposed spots. Two more legionaries fell to their knees, with one vomiting blood, forcing the healed to focus on the sick over protecting the group.
It became clear that the goblins changed their tactics and poisoned their arrows. While worthless against armor, they could still puncture the underneath clothing and scrap any exposed part of the skin.
A luperca legionnaire picked up an old broken wagon and used it as a shield to protect. With the cover, the lower ranking commanders directed the circilmen to pick off any goblins that peaked above the surface.
Combined with the haze and change of tactic, this formed a strange stalemate between the two sides. The Orias was forced into a defensive; they were well equipped to deal with any goblins who dared to get within melee range. However, the goblins had surrounded and had the range advance as they could see through the haze, allowing them to snipe any legionary who adventured far from the group.
Fraeya saw a blob of acid impact a swordsmen's scutum. The scutum started being consumed by the spell, slowly falling into pieces. The man screamed as he felt his arm burn, desperately untieing the strappings to ditch the heavy shield.
"We need to kill their shaman before we are picked off," Raegel said.
"I agreed," Henness replied. "As long as this haze is here, my suppressive team is useless."
"If I recall," Fraeya said. "A Shaman should be nearby. Someone close enough to maintain this haze and give commands but not put themselves in danger."
"Then I know where it should be," Henness said. "Let's go half-elf."
She felt her ears perk up once she realized the centurion was talking about her. She looked toward her father and saw the 'it is time to prove yourself' look. Taking a deep breath and preparing herself, she gathered behind Henness and six of his men.
The assault unit left the main one and adventurer deeper into the temple grounds. As they reached what remained of an intersection, goblins stormed out of the stone buildings to ambush the legionaries.
With their disciplined reaction, the legionaries immediately adjusted their formation and sliced down the attackers. Henness stood at the center, holding his sword out as flames wrapped around the blade.
As the goblins attacked the swordsmen, Fraeya broke apart the ground on the right flank, knocking many goblins. The one that fell, she entangled them by summoning vines - which trapped the goblins and pulled them into the ground until their death or burial.
She then turned and lifted parts of the ground on the left flank, blocking some of the goblins. This prevented the legionaries from being encircled.
"Reform," Henness ordered. "We need to advance quickly. Stay close."
Once the path was clear, the unit moved toward the building where the goblins had fortified. Henness moved in front of her to provide protection. He held up his shield, deflecting arrows.
"Stay behind me," Henness said.
While not being a military woman, Fraeya quickly learned to accept the chain of command on this quest. On the battlefield, her father told her to listen to Henness as he was a man of war. She realized that the structure and safety of the city and the academy are vastly different in the countryside. Getting behind him, she followed him close behind as he pushed forward, arrows striking his shield, allowing her to get in range for her spell.
The legionaries stopped engaging the incoming goblins, allowing their centurion and the young mage to get closer. Henness reached around his scutum and pressed the amulet attached to the outer shell's center. Once pressed, the large shield briefly glowed before darkening, returning to the standard red with white lining design.
Up ahead, Fraeya saw in full display of the nest. Spikes, fortification, and green webbing filled the gaps between the ruined structures. Skeletons and decomposing bodies littered the areas of their past victims. The goblins were standing in the bunker sections, preparing for battle. With how heavily guarded it was, she concluded that this must be where the Shaman was.
"Fraeya, now!"
Fraeya moved around the man to cast her spell. With a quick chant, her hands glowed green again. As she channeled her mana, an acid attack impacted Henness' scutum. While the added hardening enchantment from the amulet increased the scutum resistance, the acid slowly ate through the large shield.
Stepping from cover, Fraeya aimed her hands at the nest. The ground trembled a little as the front of the nest collapsed on itself from the summoned sinkhole.
With the front entrance open, Fraeya saw the Shaman in plain view—a female, being one of the few within a goblin nest. The Shama looked scared as she looked around where to hide.
Fraeya did not give it time as she cast a spell that created a spike from the ground below the Shaman and pierced straight through the vicious monster, killing it instantly.
As the Shaman staff hit the ground, the haze started to disappear.
Believing that her work was complete after killing the goblin leader, her ears quickly heard footsteps surrounding them.
Noticing that the goblins were about to swarm their position, she took cover behind Henness to protect his rear. She took a deep breath as she felt exhausted from the battle and cast so many spells quickly.
Starting at five goblins that emerged from the ruins, Fraeya watched as they charged toward them. Before they got close, however, each one was sniped from the ridge-side suppressive team.
With a moment of confusion, she stared toward the cliffside and saw the suppressive team. Now that the haze is disappearing, they could snipe off the remaining goblins from their elevation position.
"Good job, half-elf," Henness said, slowly stepping back with a shield aimed at the flames, guiding Fraeya back.
"Stop calling me half-elf," Fraeya yelled. "I am out here risking my life with the rest of you, and don't give me that war is a male-domain thing! I am willing to see this through. Most of my kind would stay home and let you fight, so why do you keep degrading me?"
"Because ideals get people killed," Fionntan Henness replied. "Out here, you must earn that respect within the brotherhood of warriors, especially if you are used to living inside the city walls. People with a self-protected mindset usually end up as food for the worms or get my soldiers killed because they do not understand what it takes to survive."
The centurion then turned to the destroyed nest. "I will say, though, what you did here. It is a good first step for a half-elf." He then turned to give her an approving smile.
Not understanding the humor from the Lat, Fraeya accepted it. From her experience, Lats always had a strange sense of humor. Insults are sometimes seen as compliments while praising could be considered offensive. Saying one thing but meaning another is a common trait for them.
With the remaining palatini coming after clearing the remaining goblins, Fraeya saw her father. She rushed over and hugged him and teared up.
"You did good, my dear," Raegel said as he patted her.
"Is this really what it is like out here?" Fraeya asked.
"Sadly, it is," Fraeya replied. "That is why I never brought you around on my digs."
"I am sorry to interrupt," Henness said. "We are on borrowed time, so can we get at it?"
Fraeya looked toward the centurion with frustration as she wanted a moment with her father. After taking a deep breath, she realized that he was right.
After finishing her hug, she brushed off the goblin's blood and clothing.
"Then we better begin searching for what we came for," Raegel said as he reached for his bag. She watched as he pulled out a perfectly smoothed, pure black orb. By itself, it didn't look impressive. She had seen hundreds of these orbs at the academy or the many workshops within the city.
Raegel held the orb in one hand and activated it with his mana. The orb glowed light blue and fainted, barely emitting any energy. He then took it against the mountain and began scanning.
Not wanting to miss anything, Fraeya quickly pulled out her journal, skipping past all her notes until she reached a blank page. She then began documenting everything her father did, taking in every world and detail.
The palatini began walking through the ruins, heading toward the mountain wall. Raegel explained in his research that the temple extended inside the mountain, like a dwarf borrian. While others who came before him came up with this theory, they were still looking for a way to detect the hidden door markings and find it.
Raegel moved down the side of the mountain, holding the orb high.
"Why are you not using a door-detecting amulet?" Fraeya asked.
"Because people have been using that for generations and found nothing here," Raegel replied.
After a reasonable amount of time when nothing had happened, Fraeya began to wonder if everything was for nothing. Seeing the lack of progress, Henness inquired if the orb failed to work. As Raegel replied, the orb suddenly blimped orange for a moment.
Witnessing the sudden change, the group backed away as they did not know how to respond to the sudden glow.
Noticing a renewed excitement from her father, she followed him closely as they investigated the mountainside.
As they searched, her father noticed that the faint blue glow from the orb had changed to orange. It then disappeared and slowly appeared, like it was slowly pulsing. When they continued walking forward, the pulsing light increased in speed.
"I think it is directing us, father," Fraeya said.
"Possible," Raegel said. "There must be some type of link."
The palatini followed the direction the orb gave. As the group approached a mountainside wall, the pulse frequency increased until it looked like the orb glowed a solid color.
"I think we found it," Raegel said. He lifted the orb toward the wall.
As the orb drew closer to the mountainside, these blue lines appeared all over the rocky wall. The rough chips of rock melted away and turned smooth as the light traveled through the grooves, slowly creating what looked like a giant door of light.
Once the bright lights finished designing a massive door, Fraeya placed her hand on the wall, shocked at how the natural bulky rocks turned into a marble-like wall.
"I would step aside, Fraeya," Raegel said.
As Fraeya stepped backward, she watched her father open the door with a magical spell. Like most magical doors, the door brightened as she expected it would fold into the mountain. To her surprise, the door didn't fold away but melted into the ground.
"What happened to the door?" Fraeya asked.
Raegal placed his hand on his chin. "It seemed that the wall was not solid but some liquid matter. These people are impressive."
The wall began to shake as dusk from the cracks spread through the area.
A large opening formed as the door walls folded into the mountainside. A passage leading deeper into the mountain. The walls were black and smooth, while the floor had these textiles in perfect order, leading deeper into the mountain.
"This has to be a dwarven design," Fraeya commented. "Only they could do something like this."
"I'm not sure," Raegel said. "This is not a design I have seen from dwarves."
Fraeya understood what her father meant. Dwarven doors into the mountains took a lot of work to find. While there were many designs of such hidden doors and the means to open them, it was doubtful that anyone had ever seen a secret magical door like this before.
Raegel started to walk into the chamber but was suddenly stopped by Henness. Stating that he wanted his men to go first to ensure no trap, three legionaries moved through the large chamber. Once they gave the clear, the rest of the group entered.
While walking, Fraeya stayed close to her father as she took notes. The soldiers ahead of them set up torches to add more light. To her surprise, the walls and floor were smooth. The air was stale, probably trapped within this chamber for centuries.
As they walked inside, the room lit up. Everyone stopped as they looked toward the end of the hall. The chamber was empty, with only a strange-looking platform at the very end. Noticing that the orb was pointing toward the platform, they approached it.
"Is this it?" Henness asked. "It does not look that impressive."
"Not everything is based on size, centurion," Raegel replied, to which his daughter giggled.
Fraeya then analyzed the platform. It was smooth, almost marble-like. However, she doubted whether it was marble. The fundamental details that she noticed were a strange-looking blue crystal at the center of the platform and another in a hole on the side.
"This is interesting," Fraeya commented. The design looked surprisingly simple. This orb must act as some command orb for this device. They must be communicating in some manner."
"Assuming that the legend was true, the orcs were the ones who summoned the lats from Altaerrie," Fraeya said. "Maybe, when this place was lost of that time, it was never turned off. Being left in a state of slumber, waiting to be reawakened."
"Possible. It would explain why the orb directed us here. The orange pulse is now pointing down at a rapid pace."
"I think it goes into that hole, father," Fraeya said. "From what I can tell, the crystal in there connects to the one on top of the platform."
"I see," Raegel said. "The pulse is pointing toward it too. I recommend that everyone step back."
"Be careful, father," Fraeya said.
Stepping back from the platform, Fraeya watched as her father placed the orb into the hole. This was the moment her father had been talking about for decades, and it had finally come true. The Bridge between two worlds had finally been discovered.
As Raegel placed the orb into the platform, it glowed orange in a solid state, no longer pulsing. The blue crystal in the middle of the platform slowly lit up, like it was waking up after a long sleep.
The air suddenly chilled as the air flowed toward the platform. A bright light beamed out of the crystal and slowly faded away, leaving a light as if on standby.
To their dismay, the orb changed to red, dimming and brightening in a slow, tired pattern.
"What is it doing, father?" Fraeya asked.
"I have no idea," Raegel replied. "It must be waiting for something."
2024.05.21 23:21 POOPSCRUFFIN4U Recommendations for prenatal vitamins
Most commercially available prenatal vitamin supplements don't meet doctor-recommended standards. I do my best to meet daily recommendations with real food, but that may not always an option for me. Suggestions for a brand of over-the-counter vitamin supplements that actually meet the recommended daily standards would be appreciated.
submitted by POOPSCRUFFIN4U to BabyBumps [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 23:19 cloudiekittie what to expect after GES?
i'm getting a 2hr GES done on thursday, and I don't know what to expect in terms of treatment. i've already lost 20lbs in 3 months (quite a lot for me, started at 146lbs), and i cant eat even 1000 calories on a day to day basis. i'm currently on pepcid, carafate and multiple anti nausea meds but nothing has helped my appetite. i've gone vegetarian, cut out dairy, tested for different allergies and, again, no luck. i'm currently eating only soft/liquid foods as much as i can since its the only way im able to function after eating. in the past month or so i've also began having muscle cramps and spasms, increased fatigue and dizziness, difficulty thinking and heavily increased pain that i believe to be related to my inability to eat but my "labs look great!". ive also heard a lot of bad things about most GP meds like reglan. how they cant really be taken long term, take forever to work if they even do and i'm just nervous i dont. have the time based on my symptoms. i cant keep keeping on like this.
tldr: whats the best plan of care? i know i shouldn't ask strangers on the Internet, but i swear u all know more than Doctors
submitted by cloudiekittie to Gastroparesis [link] [comments]
tldr: whats the best plan of care? i know i shouldn't ask strangers on the Internet, but i swear u all know more than Doctors
2024.05.21 23:17 _Triple_ [STORE] 900+ KNIVES/GLOVES/SKINS, 100.000$+ INVENTORY. BFK Lore, Gloves Amphibious, Skeleton Fade, Bowie Emerald, BFK Auto, Gloves MF, Talon Doppler, Gloves POW, Bayo Tiger, Gut Sapphire, Stiletto MF, M9 Ultra, Ursus Doppler, Flip Doppler, M9 Stained, Nomad CW, Paracord CW, AK-47 X-Ray & A Lot More
Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory
Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.
All Buyouts are listed in cash value.
KNIVES
★ Butterfly Knife Lore (Factory New), B/O: $7194.77
★ Butterfly Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2025.74
⎯★ M9 Bayonet Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $557.87
★ M9 Bayonet Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $529.41
★ M9 Bayonet Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $465.39
⎯★ Talon Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $1295.27
★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth (Minimal Wear), B/O: $746.28
★ Karambit Bright Water (Field-Tested), B/O: $688.15
⎯★ Flip Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $547.93
★ Flip Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $476.69
★ Flip Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $278.18
★ Flip Knife Black Laminate (Well-Worn), B/O: $258.83
★ Flip Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $181.64
⎯★ Stiletto Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $686.04
★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $665.41
★ Stiletto Knife, B/O: $601.39
★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $418.25
★ Stiletto Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $227.80
★ Stiletto Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.96
★ Stiletto Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $192.79
⎯★ Nomad Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $518.11
★ Nomad Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $169.78
★ Nomad Knife Forest DDPAT (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $166.88
★ StatTrak™ Nomad Knife Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $335.79
⎯★ Skeleton Knife Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $442.05
★ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Minimal Wear), B/O: $426.24
★ Skeleton Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $314.03
★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2361.28
★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $376.53
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★ Ursus Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $212.37
★ Ursus Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $187.66
★ Ursus Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $178.18
★ Ursus Knife Ultraviolet (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $155.13
★ Ursus Knife Boreal Forest (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.26
⎯★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Minimal Wear), B/O: $204.83
★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Field-Tested), B/O: $184.50
★ StatTrak™ Huntsman Knife Lore (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $224.11
⎯★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $2142.02
★ Bowie Knife, B/O: $230.44
★ Bowie Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $209.20
★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.51
★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03
⎯★ Falchion Knife Night (Field-Tested), B/O: $132.54
★ Falchion Knife Urban Masked (Well-Worn), B/O: $112.81
★ Falchion Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $108.81
★ Falchion Knife Forest DDPAT (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.82
★ Falchion Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.46
★ StatTrak™ Falchion Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $143.08
⎯★ Paracord Knife Crimson Web (Minimal Wear), B/O: $486.48
★ Paracord Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $163.12
⎯★ Survival Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $138.26
★ Survival Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03
⎯★ Gut Knife Sapphire (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1127.79
★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $286.17
★ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $246.55
★ Gut Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $240.77
★ Gut Knife, B/O: $210.49
★ Gut Knife Lore (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.22
★ Gut Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $151.51
★ Gut Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.94
★ Gut Knife Rust Coat (Well-Worn), B/O: $118.99
★ Gut Knife Boreal Forest (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.80
★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $237.96
⎯★ Shadow Daggers Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $264.92
★ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $253.03
★ Shadow Daggers Tiger Tooth (Factory New), B/O: $237.22
★ Shadow Daggers Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.40
★ Shadow Daggers Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $144.42
★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $105.20
★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $150.46
⎯★ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $365.99
★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $228.93
★ Navaja Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $227.43
★ Navaja Knife Slaughter (Factory New), B/O: $209.06
★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $203.16
★ Navaja Knife Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $132.57
★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $121.69
★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.95
★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $100.41
★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $369.01
★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $109.95
GLOVES
★ Sport Gloves Amphibious (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2394.67
★ Sport Gloves Omega (Well-Worn), B/O: $572.33
★ Sport Gloves Bronze Morph (Minimal Wear), B/O: $338.88
★ Sport Gloves Big Game (Field-Tested), B/O: $323.66
⎯★ Specialist Gloves Marble Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1652.07
★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike (Field-Tested), B/O: $599.14
★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web (Well-Worn), B/O: $231.57
★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot (Minimal Wear), B/O: $126.21
⎯★ Moto Gloves POW! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $996.99
★ Moto Gloves POW! (Field-Tested), B/O: $383.31
★ Moto Gloves POW! (Well-Worn), B/O: $276.00
★ Moto Gloves Turtle (Field-Tested), B/O: $180.28
⎯★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $502.29
★ Hand Wraps Giraffe (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.73
★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $178.32
⎯★ Driver Gloves Queen Jaguar (Minimal Wear), B/O: $181.01
★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red (Field-Tested), B/O: $101.66
⎯★ Broken Fang Gloves Jade (Field-Tested), B/O: $127.88
★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.55
⎯★ Bloodhound Gloves Guerrilla (Minimal Wear), B/O: $127.94
★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened (Field-Tested), B/O: $102.55
WEAPONS
AK-47 X-Ray (Well-Worn), B/O: $478.95
AUG Hot Rod (Factory New), B/O: $425.83
StatTrak™ M4A1-S Hyper Beast (Factory New), B/O: $413.95
M4A4 Daybreak (Factory New), B/O: $309.51
StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge (Factory New), B/O: $305.43
AK-47 Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $196.38
StatTrak™ M4A4 Temukau (Minimal Wear), B/O: $174.64
P90 Run and Hide (Field-Tested), B/O: $167.03
AWP Asiimov (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.33
Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike (Minimal Wear), B/O: $140.00
M4A1-S Printstream (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.70
StatTrak™ M4A1-S Golden Coil (Field-Tested), B/O: $117.48
AWP Asiimov (Well-Worn), B/O: $115.97
StatTrak™ Desert Eagle Printstream (Minimal Wear), B/O: $112.96
StatTrak™ AK-47 Asiimov (Minimal Wear), B/O: $110.85
Souvenir M4A1-S Master Piece (Well-Worn), B/O: $102.42
AK-47 Bloodsport (Minimal Wear), B/O: $100.53
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2024.05.21 23:17 lovelightpaint Do I have insulin resistance?
I have been having more numbness in my arms and hands. And if I drink to much sweet drinks I get tired. I been having a lot of brain fog. If I stay up to late past 8:30 I get hungry and I cave and eat. Im trying to go to bed earlier. I just have noticed that I think I can’t stay up at all with out getting extremely hungry. Once I eat a sweet food I can’t stop. Im currently trying to lose weight. Im going to cook more and eat between 10:30am-5pm and hopefully that works with tracking calories. When I have gotten a diabetes check. It always comes back negative. But can I still get stuff for diabetics and check my blood sugar?
submitted by lovelightpaint to InsulinResistance [link] [comments]