hey everyone. as you could have guessed from the title, i have not been formally diagnosed with LS and i am terrified of getting the biopsy done. ive been to a few different gynos and all of them said my vagina and skin looked ‘normal but irritated’ so not normal….
ive been tested for yeast and bacteria and they havent found anything and i did have doctors tell me they could do the punch biopsy, but i cant do it. i have a lot of trauma associated with the doctor and i do not numb well. also even if i got formally diagnosed, the treatment is just clob, which i was already given.
i just wanna know if what i am experiencing sounds similar to others here. the itching and tearing actually started around my anus and the bottom opening of my vagina. its been so itchy that it interferes with sleep and normal activity. i also felt like i had paper cuts around the area and using the bathrooms been painful. (side note, i did have a fecal examination done, no parasites)
fast forward three years and my ex partner cheated on me and gave me chlamydia. thats when the vulva/clitoral itching started. i dont rly have white patches but my skin is a little bumpy. the itching is intense and interferes with sleep and normal activity and sex is impossible due to the discomfort. clob doesnt help much either but soaking with japanese bath salts sometimes offers relief. the itching is not happening all the time but seems to happen in flares. ill go a few days without much itching but then have a ‘flare’ where its rly terrible and unbearable. the main areas where there is itching are my clitoris, the left vulva (right side hasnt been an issue weirdly enough) the opening of my vagina, the skin between my vagina opening and my anus, and my anus. i do not get white patches ever and i dont think i have any fusing but my left labia has changed in appearance over the years, there is an extra skin fold that wasnt there when i was younger and it is not on the right side. this could be unrelated.
i read that chlamydia can be a precursor to some autoimmune diseases so i was thinking maybe thats what triggered all of this but maybe i was predisposed anyway.
im female and 30 years old btw. vaginal itching started at 29 and anal itching started at 27 i believe.
does this sound like lichens? how did yall go through getting the punch biopsy? was getting a diagnosis worth it for the validation or anything?
also some questions, is there anything dangerous about using clob long term? i have seen posts about people saying they taper off of it, but why? why not just use it every day? can LS cause cancer? ive seen that word mentioned here and there and am a little spooked. how does this turn cancerous? what are the warning signs? is it always cancerous? has anyone gotten botox in the area to help with symptoms or any other kinds of treatment aside from clob that helped? immune suppressants? laser therapy? i am desperate for relief
sorry if this post is all over the place btw, in currently experiencing a bad flare so my minds not very clear

Orgasms are scientifically proven to be beneficial for your overall wellbeing; science says, ‘Yes! Yes! Yes!’
An orgasm occurs after the stimulation of the genitals or erogenous zones, with the main areas for stimulation being the clitoris, vagina, nipples, anus, penis, and testicles. An orgasm is the climax of sexual arousal, causing intense feelings of pleasure, and it is one of four stages in the body’s sexual response cycle. According to the Masters and Johnson four-phase model, the physiological process that takes place during female orgasm is: 1. Excitement, during which arousal builds and as you get excited; the heart beats faster, breathing gets heavier, muscles throughout the body tense, the skin may redden, nipples harden, more blood flows to the genitals, the clitoris swells, the vagina moistens, and the penis gets erect. 2. Plateau, during which arousal increases and levels off. The changes in the body intensify; breathing, heartbeat, and blood pressure rise, muscle tension increases even more, the vagina swells and its walls darken in colour, the clitoris becomes super-sensitive to touch, and the testicles pull upward. 3. Orgasm, which causes intense feelings of pleasure, where a series of intense muscle contractions releases the tension throughout the body; the perineal muscles and anal sphincter rhythmically and repeatedly contract (approximately once per second for several seconds), muscles of the vagina and the uterus contract to release fluid, likewise, muscles at the base of the penis tighten and release to produce semen in an ejaculation. 4. Resolution, during which arousal diminishes and pent-up energy is expelled, so the body returns to its pre-sex state; breathing calms, muscles relax, the penis and vagina return to their original size and colour, and you will have feelings of calm and satisfaction.
This four-phase cycle is a simple way of describing the human sexual response, when in reality, the human body and mind are unique. The way we respond to sex does not always fit neatly into these four boxes. It is natural and normal for everybody to experience sexual climax differently; the experience usually lasts a few seconds but can last longer, orgasmic sensations can be mild or intense, some people need specific stimulation or sexual aids to climax, sometimes you may reach orgasm quickly and easily without much stimulation but sometimes orgasm requires more time and effort. This experience occurs when the body releases sexual tension, resulting intense feelings of pleasure from your genitals and throughout your body. This sensation only lasts for a few seconds, but it feels, oh so, very good.
The different kinds of orgasms include: · Clitoral orgasm is achieved when the external part of the female genitalia is stimulated. The clitoral hood is located at the top of the vaginal opening, where the inner labia (lips) meet. Clit orgasms are felt most on the body’s surface, such as a tingling on the skin. · Vaginal orgasm is achieved thorough penetration. The vagina is the opening to the female reproductive system. Vaginal orgasms are felt deeper in the body. · Combo-O is achieved if a person experiences orgasm through the clitoris and vagina at the same time, causing a more intense orgasm. · Erogenous zones Os are rare, and are where climax is achieved with the stimulation of the erogenous zones, such as, ears, elbows, knees, neck, breasts, nipples, and wrists. · Anal orgasm is achieved by stimulating the anus (which is your bumhole).
While the body is aroused, our brain is being stimulated as well, which leads to the increased production of certain neurotransmitters, including dopamine, oxytocin, norepinephrine, vasopressin, and endorphins. These hormones are then released into your bloodstream during orgasm.
· Oxytocin is a known as the love hormone or cuddle chemical. It is a feel-good hormone released by the pituitary gland and hypothalamus in the brain. It relieves pain (potentially helping to reduce headaches after sex), induces anti-stress-like effects which reduce blood pressure and cortisol levels, exerts an anxiolytic-like effect to stimulate various types of positive social interaction, and promotes cellular growth and healing. Oxytocin acts as a chemical messenger and has an important role in many human behaviours including sexual arousal, recognition, trust, romantic attachment, and bonding.
· Dopamine is associated with pleasure and desire. It is released from the ventral tegmental area (VTA) of the brain, which communicates with other areas to assess how well our human needs are being satisfied. This feel-good hormone acts on the reward system, acting upon the areas of the brain that give you feelings of pleasure, satisfaction and motivation. Dopamine aids in controlling memory, mood, sleep, learning, concentration, movement, and other body functions.
· Norepinephrine, in addition to its role in the fight-or-flight response, it has a cru1cial role in regulating mood and arousal levels. During sexual intercourse, it increases the heart rate and blood pressure, triggers the release of glucose from energy stores, increases blood flow to skeletal muscle, and increases muscle contraction. Increased levels of this chemical will elevate mood, increase motivation, improve concentration, and boost energy levels.
· Vasopressin is the hormone associated with regulating sexual motivation. While both men and women have it, its levels increase dramatically in erection and male sexual arousal, leading to increased male desire to continue engaging in sexual activity. Following ejaculation, these levels drop back to baseline. It may be responsible for feelings of possessiveness experienced after sex, as its biological function is to develop attachment.
· Endorphins are neurotransmitters released by the pituitary gland and hypothalamus in the brain. This hormone alleviates pain, lowers stress, improves mood, and enhances your sense of well-being.
The increased production and release of these hormones promote deeper feelings of happiness and other positive emotions, and counteract the stress hormone, cortisol.
In the few minutes after orgasm, your body slowly returns to its normal state. As you recover, body parts that became swollen or erect go back to their previous size and colour, your genitals may feel overly sensitive or uncomfortable to touch, the skin all over your body can look and feel flushed, and hopefully, you will feel satisfied and relaxed. Some people may quickly become sexually aroused again, and can have multiple orgasms, while others need more time before they can go again.
Factors which can affect your ability to reach sexual climax include: · Advancing age. · Beliefs or taboos about sex. · Expectations. · Hormone imbalances such as hypogonadism. · Lack of emotional connection or comfort with a partner. · Past bad experiences with sex. · Poor physical or mental health, including some medical and psychological conditions. · Stress. · Use of certain medications, drugs, or alcohol.
Note: If you have any trouble in having an orgasm and it bothers you, please consult a healthcare provider.
An orgasm can occur during masturbation or during sex with a partner. Vibrators are not just for fun! A study published in the ‘International Urogynecology Journal’ links regular naughty toy use to a plethora of benefits beyond just pleasure. The study found that there are numerous positive effects and physical health benefits when using sex toys that include: · Natural pain relief due to the release of endorphins. · Improved sleep as orgasms promote relaxation, and release hormones like oxytocin and prolactin, which can help you feel more rested. · Improvement in heart and circulatory conditions. · Natural lubrication which can be beneficial if you suffer from vaginal dryness. · Improved pelvic floor muscles and increased vaginal tone. · Increased blood flow to the vulva and vagina, which can counteract the physical symptoms of menopause and stress. · Improved symptoms of menstrual cramps and premenstrual tension. · Mental health boost with a significant decrease in stress, anxiety, and depression. · Improved sexual function and increased desire, arousal, orgasms, and overall satisfaction. · Quality of life improvement with increased feelings of being more vibrant, boosted body- and self-confidence, and better health overall.
Finishing on a fun fact: In men, the part of the hypothalamus related to the sex drive is 2.5 times larger than it is in women, thus providing a biological explanation for why men have sex on the brain more than women – because they literally do!
However often to think about having a nice, big O, or how often you flick that bean or choke that chickadee, make sure you do it safely, sanely, and consensually all you glorious, beautiful kinksters.

littlemistresssays #positivementalattitude #BDSM #kink #spicy #BDSMcommunity #kinkcommunity #BDSMeducator #kinkeducator #spicyeducator #newsletter #may2024 #hormones #orgasm #sexualhealth #health #mentalhealth

I didn't end up learning how to masturbate until my early 30s.
I think women are much less likely to take any advantage if that crucial period during puberty where guys play with themselves to the point of learning how to masturbate
Even without an obvious root cause, like religion or trauma, plenty of women never work out their sexual needs or sexual identity
Society seems to still subtly imbue the message that none of that is for women. Women aren't meant to do that, women need to be kept 'family friendly'. Women can't be sexual, or have knowledge about their sexual needs. There's a lot of internalised shaming. It seems very controlling and strange. Women's pleasure is given only in the context of men. It was Freud in 1905 who invented that women start out as a youth orgasming with clitoral stimulation but as they grow to be an adult they have to orgasm only via vaginal stimulation from a man, else they're not grown up. It's complete bollocks and was so, so damaging. Women's clitorises were denied to have existed for a long time before then. The G spot was an invention by a man who didn't know shit too - we didn't get an MRI scan of a clitoris until the late 90s! The clit is much bigger than we thought! A lot of women's sexual research is still an absolute mystery! I want to help spread this to as many people as possible!
Now i masturbate at least once a day, i have a huge sexual imagination, a powerful sex drive, a sexual identity and I feel much more whole as a person, because sexuality is a part of being human and something we all deserve.
I have spent my life being turned on at times and not even realising it. All of my sex life has been in the context of the men i was with. I rarely orgasmed, i would tell my partners not to worry about it. I could talk about what I liked in brief detail and it was all to do with what we were about to do in that moment with a partner; i had no broader imagination.
I also didn't like porn, it made me feel weird, it was too overwhelming. It wasn't authentic. All the masturbstion apps told me to think about someone famous I liked too, and then told me to imagine them doing things to me. But what?! I didn't know what I liked so I felt silly not being able to come up with anything.
It took me a year to learn how to masturbate reliably. It took me a month to get over the kind of feelings you are describing. Touching myself felt wrong, weird, not for me, and naughty.
Which is strange! You are absolutely allowed to touch your own body, you are absolutely allowed to make yourself feel good. You are absolutely allowed to think about anything you want to.
I too, like you, had some sexual 'threads' of thoughts which I knew were vagely sexual but I didn't know what to do about them. They were tiny flickering thoughts of something i found hot.
I also got myself a vibrator. I had over the years bought one of those rabbit vibrators, thinking that they were THE vibrator, but they always felt hard and weird. Turns out a clitoral vibrator is the better idea. At first I bought a grinding vibrator, because one of my early lifelong ideas of what I found hot was to have a boy grind on me until he came. It was like a flat vibrating bike seat that I was meant to sit on.
I started with that and nightly I started putting it on myself while thinking of this very simple fantasy. I could only do it over my knickers at first - the feeling was weird and made me itch. I sropped using it to grind on almost immediately because it felt better to hold it over my clit. I persisted though, just playing while thinking until I was too tired, maybe a few minutes at first.
After about a week I got curious and started looking on Google and literotica for stories like that, which gave me more ideas of things to think about.
Eventually I explored more while using this vibrator. I eventually moved to doing it under my knickers.
I found that in time my imagination would invent new hot things. I would think those over. During the day I would also start to identify that turned on feeling and 'bank' sexy things I could now try out later on.
After about a month I had my first orgasm. It took me months after that to learn how to do it reliably. But every single one was awesome. It makes you feel great. It's totally worth it.
I still don't look at normal porn. I prefer drawn art, anime and furry nsfw art, I watch some very short clips of gif porn sometimes, and I play nsfw video games. I also have a vast bank of things I find sexy, I could talk about what turns me on in detail, and why.
I also went through periods where I would see something new, a new kink portrayed in a drawing for example, and I would find it gross, it would freak me out a bit. But that strong reaction was worth examining; sometimes it turned out that thing was turning me on unexpectedly. I sit with those things for a while and introspect on them, until I appreciate what I like about them and what weirded me out. Working through those feelings unlocks more things to embrace.
Nobody can punish you for what's in your own mind. Everything is fine to imagine. How you give yourself pleasure is absolutely up to you.
The shame subconsciously buried deep down can be powerful, but you deserve to overcome it.
The gift here, as well as awesome orgasms on tap, is that you will be able to talk to others, your partners, whoever is relevant, about what you like sexually. You will be able to advocate for yourself and your needs. It is so fulfilling how I can discuss what turns me on with my partner. He tells me too, and it's super hot. It's so hot being able to masturbate with your partner. It takes so much pressure off the both of you to take responsibility for your own orgasms. Being able to tell him what I need in order for me to cum when he is having sex with me, for example, is incredible.

I met my girlfriend 1 year ago and I've had amazing time with her traveling to many countries, doing new activities together and just normal daily life with her is fun. It's been a long distance relationship and we see each other every 2-3 weeks. We are both physicians and of the same culture and ethnicity which is hard to find. She has become my best friend, we both love each other, I get along well with her family and everything is great...except for the sex.
In the beginning the sex was "ok" for me, it definitely wasn't the best sex I've ever had but because she was so amazing in other ways, it didn't bother me. I told myself not many people have sex anyway after 10 yrs or after kids and that it's the other parts of a relationship that matters more. Fast forward to our vacations together and we still had the same issue. I could be at a beach resort, super horny, want to have sex with her, but then not be able to orgasm or stay hard. I've never had this issue before in my prior relationships. I can be hard before during the foreplay, but as soon as I go inside, I don't feel anything, so I become soft or continue thrusting until I get tired. I usually have her organsm through clitoral stimulation first before I go inside her.
Eventually it got to the point where I didn't want to have sex with her, made excuses that I was tired, either from driving the 4 hrs to see her or from work or that it was too late. I feared having sex because I knew if it was unsuccessful then we would be that much closer to breaking up. I've been so successful with my life that when we had these days where the sex didn't work out I felt like such a loser and become depressed for the rest of the day. This has even happened on vacations, a time when I'm usually at my happiest. I felt like Ethan in White Lotus season 2 who is super successful, but has a boring relationship, watches porn, ignores his wife who wants to have sex. It was sad and hit me hard.
With my prior relationships with ex's, I never had a issue with sex even with my penis being on the small side. My ex's would all be surprised how good the sex was, would call me a porn star, and I would have sex almost every time I met my partner. It's very different picture in my current relationship.
I've constantly been thinking about why the sex sucks now vs my prior relationships. At first i thought it was her weight and the fact that I can only do one position with her and that I couldn't go as deep because of a fat pad. Then I thought it was because my sex drive was not high enough since i wasn't working out as much. Then I was thinking it was the stress of my board exams. Then I thought it was psychological and the fear of breaking up. I got a pill for Viagra to see if that would help and it didn't. I've tried different positions but that didn't work well. I'm now at a loss and think we are just physically incompatible. My penis is on the small end and I can't feel anything when I am inside her. She admitted she can't feel anything either. I guess I can try not wearing a condom (after she goes on birth control) and she can try kegels, but again that's putting the blame on her which is not my intention. And there's no guarantee that kegels will help.
I think if it wasn't for the sex issue I would have already been shopping around for a ring.
When we talked about this, she has decided she is willing to give up a sex life at 30 for me. Her thinking is that no relationship will be perfect and at least she knows with me, this is what she has to give up and yes she can find someone else but even that one will not be perfect and there will be something she will have to give up. She's still unhappy about it. She said she will masturbate, I can masturbate but continue to try to make it work. My thoughts are that she's still only 30, she can definitely find someone else who has better sexual compatibility and she shouldn't be giving up on her sex life because of me. I'd understand if we had kids already or we were 10 years into a relationship, but sometimes I feel like it's only been a year, maybe she's not the one for me. I'm 32, my options are getting limited, but I'm unsure if I want a life of a dead bedroom for a companion. I'm worried that this will cause resentment for both of us and lead to either infidelity or divorce which being a physician, could still financially ruin me since I still make twice as much as her. I've always been told the key to financial success is one wife.
She is moving states to live with me in a month. She has a job lined up to start in a few months. However, my parents (who do not know what they want to do in life and have no house or job) are currently living with me. Under no circumstances will my gf live with my parents, no do I want her to. So my parents will have to move out which really feels like I have to kick my parents out in order to make room for my girlfriend. My fear is that we can continue trying to work out the sex and that if she moves in with me and we break up while she is with me, she will have no where to go. No friends in the area. 6 month notice for her contract. I'm at a loss. If we don't live together, we can't work out out sexual issues.
If I also break up with her, I fear I won't find anyone else who can give me the same amount of love. I'm old, bald, short, dating apps don't work for me, and living in a rural area.
Tldr: Girlfriend of 1 year is my best friend and perfect for me but we already have a dead bedroom. She's also moving states to live with me and start a new job in a month. In order for her to move in with me, I have to kick out my parents. If she doesn't move in with me, we can't figure out the sex part.

I am struggling so bad I need help right now. I’m 18 and i’m 99% sure I have PCOS (i have cysts on my ovaries, hormonal acne, hair loss, pelvic pain, irregular periods, high cortisol, loss of libido).
Mainly the thing that is causing me the most torment is the loss of libido, although I do feel like the root of all my symptoms is PCOS / high cortisol. I have little to no libido. Depending on my cycle, my libido goes up a little when I ovulate and then back down to almost 0 the rest of the time (occasionally goes up a bit again right before my period). This is a huge problem for me for several reasons.

1. I have a boyfriend and I want to WANT to have sex with him. It honestly feels like my brain is telling me I should want this but my body is just like no you’ll be fine without it. He is so kind and never pressures me into anything and he tries to help me and does research for me and everything and it hurts that I can’t have a similar sex drive to him. When I do have sex with him, there are times when things don’t exactly go the way they should (for example I can’t get wet at all or I’ll be wet and then dry up. when i ovulate i don’t really have this issue). I don’t expect sex to be perfect but it’s frustrating when this happens more often than I feel it should be happening, and I usually feel let down and like I’m letting him down.
2. I’m 18 and I’ve never really even felt an urge to masturbate so I never did. When I started dating my boyfriend, I was pretty eager to explore but as time when on and I got comfortable with the new things I tried, it sort of dwindled out so that I no longer felt any urge to try anything or continue anything. I’ve never properly masturbated. Recently I’ve been trying to do it on my own to learn what I like but it is a struggle. Rarely do I feel turned on when I try, it’s mostly just me trying to “show up for myself” and be consistent with trying (if I don’t try and be consistent, I’ll never feel the urge to masturbate). When I actually masturbate, there is no pleasure. Literally no pleasure. I know the clit is supposed to have all these nerve endings, but when I masturbate I either feel nothing or this odd sensation (my clit gets very sensitive and it’s not pleasant). I’ve tried to focus on this sensation and get past it in the hopes that maybe it’ll turn to pleasure, but it never does. Instead, my body starts to jerk and jump like a reflex to stop because of how not pleasant the sensation is. I’ve tried both direct clitoral stimulation (too sensitive) and non-direct clitoral stimulation (don’t feel anything). Also, because it’s hard for me to get turned on, I can’t really get wet (I’ve used lube before which helps). I’ve tried a vibrator, watching *videos* of my boyfriend and I, solely using my imagination. I’ve tried different motions and movements and speeds with my fingers and nothing works or stands out. It feels like my clit has no pleasure nerves or something. I just can’t seem to find what works for me in terms of both pleasure (tried using my fingers / vibrator in various ways but nothing stands out or brings me pleasure) and arousal (the different ways to get turned on, nothing really works). When nothing happens, I end up feeling really down and not wanting to try again.

Important things to note:

• It’s much easier to get turned on when my boyfriend is doing things to me, because when I try it by myself my mind wanders
  
• Yes, I do find my boyfriend attractive
  
• Yes, sex is pleasurable for me but my body reacts oddly sometimes (drying up). And despite knowing that sex is pleasurable for me, it’s hard for me to actually want it. Once I get going, I love it though but I still know there’s supposed to be more to it.
  
• I take various vitamins / supplements (vitamin c, vitamin d3, biotin, a magnesium calcium zinc complex, and most recently “hers libido supplements desire” with ashwagandha, L-citrulline, ginkgo biloba, and damiana leaf but I haven’t noticed any drastic changes between taking it and not)
  
• Also something important is that when my boyfriend fingers me, I do squirt but it only feels like I’m peeing myself and there is no other pleasure in it (other than maybe the “sweet relief” feeling that everybody gets when they feel like they have to pee and then do) aka I am not orgasming. While he is actively fingering me, I do find that enjoyable just like penetration. But I know there is supposed to be more to it, I know there is supposed to be more pleasure when it comes to both clitoral stimulation and squirting / coming
  
• Once we finish having sex or I finish squirting, it can get pretty dry and uncomfortable down there so even if we want to go again and he turns me on, my body still can't get wet and we have to use lube
  
• I’m going to have a talk with my gynecologist about all this but I do have a feeling she will be pushing towards birth control, because she was already pushing for it to get rid of my cysts and to regulate my hormones. I’m not against birth control and if necessary, I will go on it but I’d prefer for that to be a last resort. Ideally I’m hoping for natural remedies that can heal the root cause of all my symptoms, especially my loss of libido, but I’m also at a point where I will take what I can get (something that will actually give me results and doesn’t take years to see results)
  
• I have high cortisol / stress so I also need ways to lower that because I think that part of the reason I can’t masturbate / orgasm is mental and I’m scared to “lose control” of myself in that way. However, I believe this mental block is unrelated to the fact that I just can’t feel pleasure down there
  
• Just to be absolutely clear, i have NEVER orgasmed and never felt close to it
  

TL;DR…
I’m 18 years old and I am pretty sure I have PCOS since I have several symptoms. The symptom causing me the most issue is my loss of libido. I have little to no libido. My libido will go up a bit when I’m ovulating but other than that, I would say it is very low. I have a boyfriend and I want to WANT to have sex with him—my brain tells me that I should want this but my body reacts as if it could be fine without it. I want to have a higher sex drive and it hurts that we’re not on similar levels. When we do have sex, sometimes things go wrong (I can’t get wet enough or I’ll be wet and then dry up). I don’t expect sex to be perfect but it’s frustrating when this happens more often than I feel it should be happening, and I usually feel let down and like I’m letting him down. Aside from this, I’m 18 and have never really felt an urge to masturbate and so therefore never orgasmed. Recently I’ve been trying to do it on my own to learn what I like but it is a struggle. I don’t really feel turned on when I decide to try, and when I do masturbate, I am both not wet and there is literally no pleasure ever. I either feel nothing or my clit gets super sensitive and it is not pleasant. I’ve tried to focus on this sensation and get past it in the hopes that maybe it’ll turn to pleasure, but it never does. Instead, my body starts to jerk and jump like a reflex to stop because of how not pleasant the sensation is. I’ve tried different things: direct clitoral stimulation, non-direct clitoral stimulation, using a vibrator, watching *videos* of my boyfriend and I, using just my imagination, doing different motions and speeds. Nothing works. It really feels like my clit has no pleasure nerves or something. I just can’t seem to find what works for me in terms of both being pleasuring myself and arousing myself. When nothing happens, I end up feeling really down and not wanting to try again.
Important things to note:

• It’s much easier to get turned on when my boyfriend is doing things to me, because when I try it by myself my mind wanders
  
• Yes, I do find my boyfriend attractive
  
• Yes, sex is pleasurable for me but my body reacts oddly sometimes (drying up). And despite knowing that sex is pleasurable for me, it’s hard for me to actually want it. Once I get going, I love it though but I still know there’s supposed to be more to it.
  
• I take various vitamins / supplements (vitamin c, vitamin d3, biotin, a magnesium calcium zinc complex, and most recently “hers libido supplements desire” with ashwagandha, L-citrulline, ginkgo biloba, and damiana leaf but I haven’t noticed any drastic changes between taking it and not)
  
• Also something important is that when my boyfriend fingers me, I do squirt but it only feels like I’m peeing myself and there is no other pleasure in it / no orgasm. While he is actively fingering me, I do find that enjoyable just like penetration. But I know there is supposed to be more to it, I know there is supposed to be more pleasure when it comes to both clitoral stimulation and squirting / coming
  
• Once we finish having sex or I finish squirting, it can get pretty dry and uncomfortable down there so even if we want to go again and he turns me on, my body still can't get wet and we have to use lube
  
• I’m going to have a talk with my gynecologist about all this but I do have a feeling she will be pushing towards birth control, because she was already pushing for it to get rid of my cysts and to regulate my hormones. I’m not against birth control and if necessary, I will go on it but I’d prefer for that to be a last resort. Ideally I’m hoping for natural remedies that can heal the root cause of all my symptoms, especially my loss of libido, but I’m also at a point where I will take what I can get (something that will actually give me results and doesn’t take years to see results)
  
• I have high cortisol / stress so I also need ways to lower that because I think that part of the reason I can’t masturbate / orgasm is mental and I’m scared to “lose control” of myself in that way. However, I believe this mental block is unrelated to the fact that I just can’t feel pleasure down there
  
• Just to be absolutely clear, i have NEVER orgasmed and never felt close to it
  

I'm sorry I know this is long just please help me I'm desperate

After I cam back from Mexico, sick and traumatized I started making a porn to do casting calls for. I was exploring fetishes. I was learning to take my power back, I was living up to the title of my Book Memoires de Sarita- OD'd on Pleasure. It was a good distraction from the physical suffering and helped me to work through some personal things. Here is the memoir I wrote during that time period.
​
Wonder Woman- Confess Your Desires
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I am a poly switch unicorn adventurer, curious, imaginative, entrepreneurial, nice, and turned on by mental stimulation, threesomes and my nipples being played with during a clitoral stimulation. No anal and no cum in the face, except on rare occasions. Cum below the neck and only the tongue and finger in the ass. ok, I make porn, I am writing a book, and a movie, and have a school in Puerto Escondido Mexico with a mezcal, working towards having a sustainable ranch with swingers in México and here in Washington State USA, where we can make an Airbnb and have events where I can bathe nude in the sun! I would like a sailboat to go between the ranches with swingers, always with cameras rolling. I would like to make the ranch with swingers who are into either cam shows, selling on snapchat and only fans and making porn, or all of the above and go live 24/7 with subscriptions. We all support each other and share knowledge, helping each other to succeed. I need a website and I would like to have someone who can help me with, along with my hacker problem. I would also like to make an app. google saritapleasure, sarah lauer foster is my Facebook. saritahippie is my Instagram. Next weekend I am practicing for my Wonder Woman shoot and learning some DOMness. Are there any areas you can help me with?
Wonder Woman- Confess your desires!
It takes place on the top of a hill on the shores of Sweden.
The opening scene is of two couples fucking each other as the guys luggage is sitting there. Its an emotional good bye fuck, Lots of “Ill miss you and worry about you” as they fuck and say good bye. It's two swinger couples who live together. After the men head down to their Viking ships, the women comfort each other's sadness from the men leaving.
They move it inside to the bed and they hear the young neighbor peeping in the curtain, but they continue, no bother. And then they hear some noise, and go outside, and three burglars are robbing their farm now that they saw the men leaving. So the youngest most bashful character will be thrown in the house as he is peeking in the window, and the other three are lassoed by 3 three lassos and forced to enter on their knees where swinger sister and I tie them up.
Make them confess the crime and then confess their desires. I bring out my girlfriend to have some fun with them in a boobless red and gold halter top, see through white g string and tall sexy black Viking style boots.
After the young neighbor and 3 robbers cum after they confess their desires, Wonder Woman puts the truth lasso on her swinger sister. And she looks bashful and says with her eyes, “I desire you.” and they start making out. When her husband comes back because he forgot something., he disciplines me and interrogates the guys still tied up. He is playing the mad jealous guy, but then he is getting turned on by the guys lusting after his wife and the control that I had over the situation. He wants me to spank this guy, but my hand is getting sore so I have him spank him and put his head in my lap, shoving my underwear in his mouth when he is too loud. My husband loves an excuse to discipline me, and so he has them all get on their knees and picks a fruit and vegetable to put in their mouths, has me get on all fours in front of it and sit on it.
so it's no sex for the robbers, only the Viking husband. but they will get a poke a lick and the fruit or veggie in the mouth for my vagina to fuck, etc.
The Viking husband asks them if they are ok when he comes in and gets mad. I am saying,” they robbed me, baby aren't you proud of me?”
Viking Husband starts asking the guys if it was fun being dominated by his wife and some say yes and some are thinking about it and nodding yes and then no.
He says, “Say, ya, she has been teasing you and won't let her touch her, ja, poor things. here,” and take me up to them but telling them, 1 ok, you are allowed 1 poke, the next, one lick of my nipple, and the other POKE in my arse.
He disciplines them for fucking with his farm and his wife, by giving them instructions for how to drive me wild, but its their punishment tease with me, tied and vulnerable. They can only do as my husband says. I am blindfolded with the spreaders. He can have them do things super gently with feathers, toothpicks, gently touching with the end of their fingertips. let them stick a finger in once but only once in and out, one in my mouth, one in my vagina and one in my butt.
Then when they look anxious for more, he gets mad at them for robbing his farm and says “I am mad at all of you,” have them get in a circle around me and make me back into the fruits and veggies in their mouth. Asking “is this what you were really after.” when i am finished with the 4 of them with the fruits and veggies in their mouths while i back into it. “Well, if you ever come anywhere near here again, or see that pussy again, your in big trouble”
After getting their confessions he is getting all of the details out of them, unties me and makes mad passionate love to me. When he cums, he has the big Viking ties u, lick the cum from my pussy.
fade to black!
​

you know what really grinds my gears? how as children we were constantly told “you will understand when you’re older”. will i?? will i mom?? my realization was just when im googling something about my private genital area and im literally here asking myself “what exactly is my clitoral hood?” don’t get my wrong, i know where my clit is but what exact region is my hood? i’m looking at all these google images and i see some paintings that resemble vaginas and it dawns on me. i literally grew up with a vagina on my wall. it’s a painting of a flower but i did research and this artist is inspired by VAGINAS. so i have this memory of the adults in my family coming to the realization of what they are looking at and little kid me is asking what’s going on?? what is the painting?? all i see is a flower? so i’m just brushed off and told i will understand once im older. i grew up always looking at this painting, trying to see what the adults are seeing. well, here i am, 27 years old and i am googling what parts of my vagina are. when my mother could have sat me down and explained what it was. what i had on my own body. to go to the bathroom and take a look because i never had the idea of even actually looking at my genitals until my early 20s.
don’t get me wrong, there are probably some things you could tell a kid they will understand when they’re older or maybe wait a little longer to explain some things when they are older but something like that? kids need to explore their bodies and also know their bodies. but that’s just something that grins my gears. educate your children, please

So, I had my consultation with the Lubos clinic yesterday. I think the wait time was about 6 months but I had to have it rescheduled ,so about 8 months ish. I had my consultation with Dr. Merz. Ideally I would've wanted it with Oliver Markovsky but I figured this would work just as well. Me and my support person are from Denmark so there's roughly a 10-12 hour drive from Denmark to Munich so we turned it into a road trip which was really nice.
We slept at a hotel in Pasing the day before and went to the clinic. It took a second to find the clinic, it's on a corner in the city and looks pretty nice. They got this wood floor and wide stairs with wide steps, overall a nice building. My appointment was at 9am and when we got there we had to fill out some consent forms, you know some basic stuff like that they're allowed to read your medical stuff etc. Around 9:30am I got to talk to the Dr. Merz. Firstly he asked me some basic questions about where i live, if i'm right or left handed, insurance etc. Then showed me this presentation with pictures and went over the basic steps of it all.
Typically the first surgery would consist of making the “Klitpen” as they call it and UL (Similar to metoidioplasty) as well as removing everything inside (hysterectomy, v-nectomy etc.) Altho I don't want v-nectomy or hysto, just ovaries removed. Altho he recommended I get my fallopian tubes removed as well because of cancer risks and such.
Plus/minus fallopian tubes doesn't make a whole lot of difference to me. Then in the second surgery would be where they take the skin graft itself, from the arm (RFF) or thigh (ALT) I asked and they only do those two methods, and yes they only do these two methods. And then he describes something I don't think I've heard before. They’d more or less invert the Klitpen and have it re-emerge higher up than it was previously located.
The doc was impressed at how fast I understood that btw, he said it took him longer to understand how that works, which ofc made me kinda happy ☺️ Ive been researching this stuff for what, almost 4 years at this point. But the best way I can describe it is after the Klitpen has been inverted and re-emerges higher up that's when they connect everything together with the graft as well as UL.
To my understanding doing UL with the klitpen first makes this whole inversion process easier (I think?) When they connect everything they do a nerve hook-up with the clitoral nerve and this other nerve called v. ilioinguinal nerve.
After that the third surgery is glansplasty and scrotoplasty. I asked about VY scrotoplasty vs Bifid and Dr. Merz said they do whichever fits my anatomy best. Basically if they can tell one would work better than the other they'll do whichever is best for the individual. On one hand I really want bifid scrotoplasty but it's also somewhat comforting to know if that wouldn't give me a good outcome that they wouldn't do that just because I said so. But he did say I could make requests, so if I really want bifid they'll see what they can do.
The fourth surgery is the erectile implant, and like Dr. Liedl at Planegg they recommended the pump over the rod but it sounded like they could do either. He also mentioned a Belgian study that showed the pump usually breaks after ~5 years rather than 10 years as they used to think. So it is something I'd need replaced. I asked him loads of questions and I wrote down as much as possible.
I asked about the expected size and he said the graft they take is ~15 cm or 16 cm but that usually most end up with ~12 cm because there's some hormone in the skin that makes it shrink. But he also said cis German men have about 13 cm on average so I wouldn't stand out. In terms of the diameter the expected size is 3,5cm so ~10.9cm circumference.
The waiting time from you show up with the indication letter ( which is all they need to proceed ) is about 6 months. They do accept if someone wanted/could pay out of pocket but but it seemed very much like they'd prefer Insurance. As for costs, I got an email from them a couple hours after leaving the clinic detailing everything in terms of costs. Altho in german ( I'm not that good at German yet so I don't understand it ) but I can read the numbers.
The first surgery aka the Klitpen comes to about €15,5k. The second surgery is €30,7k aka the creation of the phallus itself. the third surgery is €10,5k and the fourth surgery aka the erectile implant is €16,2k. So all costs would be around ~€73k total. I got my support person to translate some of the basics and it says those are the average prices and that it can change based off of the person. So for example if you have complications it can easily get more expensive.
It also said self-paying folks need to have the money up-front for each surgery. So not the full 73k but for each individual surgery. Also that when you don't have insurance certain stuff will be different. I also asked him about UL and grafts and how they usually take some part of the vaginal canal and use it for UL, which he confirmed they did.
But he said if I wanna keep my vaginal canal then they generally wouldn't do that and using the minora instead was fine. He also confirmed that after the surgeries and such penetration might not be possible and that they could do a surgery to try to open it up a bit if that's something I'd want but that even with the surgery to open it up more it's not a guarantee.
In terms of post-OP sensation he said that in the phallus there would always be most sensation where the klitpen was burried. ( we also briefly talked about the term “burried” he thought it sounded so tragic lol ) in terms of where the skin graft, he explained after they've taken the skin from the arm they'll take a strip of skin from the stomach and put over the donor site ( that's what I believe its called anyway)
Then they'll sew stuff together and basically to my understanding you'd loose some belly from it. The scar you'd get from the skin they take from the belly would be a line on the belly in a place where your swim trunks would cover them according to Dr. Merz. Personally I'm okay with that. I've been considering getting a tattoo in that area anyway.
As for recovery time, I didnt get a clear answer cause he said it'd be in the email ( it wasn't ) but from what I remember I think he said you might expect to stay in the hospital for up to a week or two depending on which surgery you get. On one of the slides he showed it said there's about 6-12 months between each surgery ( so if there's 4 surgeries total excluding compilation that means it takes between 2-4 years from first surgery till you're finished )
I also asked about medical tattooing and he said that's not something they do or cover, and he believed insurance wouldn't cover it either. He didn't know any clinics to go to etc. all he could say is that you should probably wait 1-2 years before getting medical tattooing (on your phallus).
Dr. Merz also said they do about 140-150 phalloplasties per year and showed some statistics and damn it looked good. In terms of satisfaction most gave it an 8, 9 or 10 (in that order) and there was no one who gave it a score under 4. In terms of sensation ~40% of people had 20-50% sensation and ~35% had 50% or more.
In terms of satisfaction with orgasm ~30% gave it a 10, ~17% gave it an 8 and ~16% gave it a 9. Very few gave anything below that. In terms of problems with peeing almost 60% never had issues with peeing and less than 15% had occasionally and even less percentage of people had it often.
I think that's all the info. I'll make an edit if there's anything I remember.
After the consultation I only had to pay €50 because I asked for some papers but I don't think the consultation itself cost anything? If it does I haven't been billed yet at least. That's all for now. Hope it's helpful to y'all. I also wrote a post about how it was to go and see Dr. Liedl at Planegg if you wanna read that, link to it here
If there's anything I didn't cover that you'd want to know, feel free to ask, I'll try to answer as well as I can.

So, I had my consultation with the Lubos clinic yesterday. I think the wait time was about 6 months but I had to have it rescheduled ,so about 8 months ish. I had my consultation with Dr. Merz. Ideally I would've wanted it with Oliver Markovsky but I figured this would work just as well. Me and my support person are from Denmark so there's roughly a 10-12 hour drive from Denmark to Munich so we turned it into a road trip which was really nice.
We slept at a hotel in Pasing the day before and went to the clinic. It took a second to find the clinic, it's on a corner in the city and looks pretty nice. They got this wood floor and wide stairs with wide steps, overall a nice building. My appointment was at 9am and when we got there we had to fill out some consent forms, you know some basic stuff like that they're allowed to read your medical stuff etc. Around 9:30am I got to talk to the Dr. Merz. Firstly he asked me some basic questions about where i live, if i'm right or left handed, insurance etc. Then showed me this presentation with pictures and went over the basic steps of it all.
Typically the first surgery would consist of making the “Klitpen” as they call it and UL (Similar to metoidioplasty) as well as removing everything inside (hysterectomy, v-nectomy etc.) Altho I don't want v-nectomy or hysto, just ovaries removed. Altho he recommended I get my fallopian tubes removed as well because of cancer risks and such.
Plus/minus fallopian tubes doesn't make a whole lot of difference to me. Then in the second surgery would be where they take the skin graft itself, from the arm (RFF) or thigh (ALT) I asked and they only do those two methods, and yes they only do these two methods. And then he describes something I don't think I've heard before. They’d more or less invert the Klitpen and have it re-emerge higher up than it was previously located.
The doc was impressed at how fast I understood that btw, he said it took him longer to understand how that works, which ofc made me kinda happy ☺️ Ive been researching this stuff for what, almost 4 years at this point. But the best way I can describe it is after the Klitpen has been inverted and re-emerges higher up that's when they connect everything together with the graft as well as UL.
To my understanding doing UL with the klitpen first makes this whole inversion process easier (I think?) When they connect everything they do a nerve hook-up with the clitoral nerve and this other nerve called v. ilioinguinal nerve.
After that the third surgery is glansplasty and scrotoplasty. I asked about VY scrotoplasty vs Bifid and Dr. Merz said they do whichever fits my anatomy best. Basically if they can tell one would work better than the other they'll do whichever is best for the individual. On one hand I really want bifid scrotoplasty but it's also somewhat comforting to know if that wouldn't give me a good outcome that they wouldn't do that just because I said so. But he did say I could make requests, so if I really want bifid they'll see what they can do.
The fourth surgery is the erectile implant, and like Dr. Liedl at Planegg they recommended the pump over the rod but it sounded like they could do either. He also mentioned a Belgian study that showed the pump usually breaks after ~5 years rather than 10 years as they used to think. So it is something I'd need replaced. I asked him loads of questions and I wrote down as much as possible.
I asked about the expected size and he said the graft they take is ~15 cm or 16 cm but that usually most end up with ~12 cm because there's some hormone in the skin that makes it shrink. But he also said cis German men have about 13 cm on average so I wouldn't stand out. In terms of the diameter the expected size is 3,5cm so ~10.9cm circumference.
The waiting time from you show up with the indication letter ( which is all they need to proceed ) is about 6 months. They do accept if someone wanted/could pay out of pocket but but it seemed very much like they'd prefer Insurance. As for costs, I got an email from them a couple hours after leaving the clinic detailing everything in terms of costs. Altho in german ( I'm not that good at German yet so I don't understand it ) but I can read the numbers.
The first surgery aka the Klitpen comes to about €15,5k. The second surgery is €30,7k aka the creation of the phallus itself. the third surgery is €10,5k and the fourth surgery aka the erectile implant is €16,2k. So all costs would be around ~€73k total. I got my support person to translate some of the basics and it says those are the average prices and that it can change based off of the person. So for example if you have complications it can easily get more expensive.
It also said self-paying folks need to have the money up-front for each surgery. So not the full 73k but for each individual surgery. Also that when you don't have insurance certain stuff will be different. I also asked him about UL and grafts and how they usually take some part of the vaginal canal and use it for UL, which he confirmed they did.
But he said if I wanna keep my vaginal canal then they generally wouldn't do that and using the minora instead was fine. He also confirmed that after the surgeries and such penetration might not be possible and that they could do a surgery to try to open it up a bit if that's something I'd want but that even with the surgery to open it up more it's not a guarantee.
In terms of post-OP sensation he said that in the phallus there would always be most sensation where the klitpen was burried. ( we also briefly talked about the term “burried” he thought it sounded so tragic lol ) in terms of where the skin graft, he explained after they've taken the skin from the arm they'll take a strip of skin from the stomach and put over the donor site ( that's what I believe its called anyway)
Then they'll sew stuff together and basically to my understanding you'd loose some belly from it. The scar you'd get from the skin they take from the belly would be a line on the belly in a place where your swim trunks would cover them according to Dr. Merz. Personally I'm okay with that. I've been considering getting a tattoo in that area anyway.
As for recovery time, I didnt get a clear answer cause he said it'd be in the email ( it wasn't ) but from what I remember I think he said you might expect to stay in the hospital for up to a week or two depending on which surgery you get. On one of the slides he showed it said there's about 6-12 months between each surgery ( so if there's 4 surgeries total excluding compilation that means it takes between 2-4 years from first surgery till you're finished )
I also asked about medical tattooing and he said that's not something they do or cover, and he believed insurance wouldn't cover it either. He didn't know any clinics to go to etc. all he could say is that you should probably wait 1-2 years before getting medical tattooing (on your phallus).
Dr. Merz also said they do about 140-150 phalloplasties per year and showed some statistics and damn it looked good. In terms of satisfaction most gave it an 8, 9 or 10 (in that order) and there was no one who gave it a score under 4. In terms of sensation ~40% of people had 20-50% sensation and ~35% had 50% or more.
In terms of satisfaction with orgasm ~30% gave it a 10, ~17% gave it an 8 and ~16% gave it a 9. Very few gave anything below that. In terms of problems with peeing almost 60% never had issues with peeing and less than 15% had occasionally and even less percentage of people had it often.
I think that's all the info. I'll make an edit if there's anything I remember.
After the consultation I only had to pay €50 because I asked for some papers but I don't think the consultation itself cost anything? If it does I haven't been billed yet at least. That's all for now. Hope it's helpful to y'all. I also wrote a post about how it was to go and see Dr. Liedl at Planegg if you wanna read that, link to it here
If there's anything I didn't cover that you'd want to know, feel free to ask, I'll try to answer as well as I can.

Raising a teenage boy can be an exciting and rewarding experience, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges. As parents, we often find ourselves navigating through the hormonal changes, academic pressures, and emotional disconnections that come with the territory. Understanding and addressing these common challenges is crucial in providing the support and guidance our teenage boys need during this crucial phase of their lives. In this blog, we will explore some of the most common challenges parents face when raising teenage boys and provide strategies for effectively navigating these obstacles. Whether you're dealing with mood swings, academic struggles, communication barriers, emotional disconnection, or simply trying to survive the rollercoaster ride of parenting a teenage boy, this survival guide is here to help. So let's dive in and discover how we can navigate the teen years together!

1. Understanding the Hormonal Changes: Dealing with Mood Swings and Unwanted Boners

Navigating the hormonal changes that come with puberty can be a challenging time for both teenagers and their parents. As a parent of a teenage boy, it's important to understand the role of testosterone in the body and how it can affect mood and physical changes.
Testosterone is a crucial sex hormone that plays a role in the development of secondary sexual characteristics, such as body hair growth and muscle mass. It also has an impact on mood and sexual health.
Recognizing the signs of high testosterone levels in people with vulvas can help you understand what your teenager may be going through. Some signs include abnormal body hair growth, increased muscle mass, and irregular periods. It can also affect sexual health, leading to a reduced sex drive, vaginal dryness, and difficulty getting pregnant. Mood changes, such as irritability, anxiety, and depression, can also be a result of high testosterone levels.
If you notice any of these symptoms in your teenager, it's important to consult with a doctor. A doctor can help determine the best course of treatment, which may include medications or lifestyle changes. It's important to emphasize to your teenager that these changes are a normal part of puberty and that seeking help is important for their overall health and well-being.
Additionally, it's important to address common concerns and questions that may arise. Some teenagers may experience acne due to high testosterone levels, while others may notice changes in breast or clitoral size. It's important to reassure your teenager that these changes are normal and that they should feel comfortable discussing any concerns with their doctor.
Parenting teenage boys can be a challenging and sometimes stressful experience, but understanding the hormonal changes they are going through can help you navigate this phase with empathy and support. Encouraging open communication, teaching them to think for themselves, and helping them form their own opinions and values can also be beneficial during this time. Remember to prioritize their sleep, as hormonal changes can affect their sleep patterns, and support their academic success by creating a conducive environment for learning.

2. Balancing Academics and Hobbies: Nurturing Academic Success in Teen Boys

The challenge of balancing academics and hobbies in today's fast-paced world is a common concern for parents of teenage boys. As parents, we want to support our children in exploring their passions and talents, whether it be through acting, sports, or other extracurricular activities. However, the fear often arises that these pursuits might overshadow the importance of academic development.
Striking a balance becomes crucial to ensure that our young talents not only excel in their chosen fields but also receive a well-rounded education that prepares them for a successful future. This is where Schoolio, with its innovative approach to customized learning, plays a pivotal role.
One of the primary reasons parents are turning to Schoolio is its commitment to personalized, flexible learning solutions. The traditional one-size-fits-all education model may not cater to the unique needs and schedules of children engaged in acting and sports. Schoolio's tailored approach allows students to design their academic schedules around their commitments, ensuring they can pursue their passions without compromising on their education.
Flexibility in learning is key to finding the right balance. Schoolio understands that every child is different and requires a personalized learning journey. With customizable curriculum options and flexible schedules, students can maintain a healthy balance between academics and extracurricular activities. Whether your child is preparing for an upcoming play, a sports competition, or simply needs extra time for rehearsals, Schoolio ensures that their education is not sacrificed.
In the next section, we will explore the specific ways in which Schoolio supports students in balancing academics and extracurricular activities. From providing resources for time management to offering support for specialized interests, Schoolio is dedicated to nurturing academic success in teen boys while allowing them to pursue their passions.

3. Communication Strategies: Teaching Teen Boys to Think for Themselves and Form Opinions

Communication Strategies: Teaching Teen Boys to Think for Themselves and Form Opinions
Understanding teenage communication patterns is essential for parents who want to effectively communicate with their teenage boys. Teenagers, in general, have unique communication styles influenced by their peers and the advancements in technology and social media. However, when it comes to teenage boys, there are specific strategies that can help parents navigate the challenges and foster independent thinking and opinion formation.

1. Acknowledge and Validate Emotions: Teenage boys, like all teenagers, experience intense emotions during adolescence. It is important for parents to listen to their sons and accept their feelings, even if they seem overwhelming or irrational. By providing a welcoming space where boys can freely express their emotions, parents can build trust and encourage open communication.
2. Encourage Exploration and Self-Expression: Communication is a powerful tool for teenage boys to learn about themselves and develop their identities. Parents should create a safe environment where boys can explore different methods of self-expression, such as through art, music, or writing. This allows them to develop their unique voices and gain confidence in expressing their thoughts and opinions.
3. Address Peer Influence: Peer pressure and the need for social approval can heavily influence teenage boys' communication habits. Parents should be aware of the impact of peer dynamics and keep the lines of communication open. By understanding their son's social connections, parents can better support him in navigating peer influence while encouraging independent thinking and decision-making.
4. Navigate Technology and Social Media: The influence of technology and social media cannot be ignored in today's digital age. Parents of teenage boys should be proactive in understanding the impact of these platforms on communication patterns and relationships. Setting clear boundaries and guidelines for technology use can help boys develop healthy communication habits and critical thinking skills.

By implementing these communication strategies, parents can not only navigate the challenges of raising teenage boys but also empower them to think for themselves and form their own opinions and values. It is important to remember that this phase of adolescence can be challenging, but with patience, understanding, and effective communication, parents can support their teenage boys in becoming confident and independent individuals.

4. Coping with Emotional Disconnection: Navigating Teen Boys' Shunning of Affection

Ideas for coping when your adult child cuts you out of their life:

1. Allow yourself to grieve: Being cut out of your adult child's life is a shocking loss, and it's important to give yourself permission to grieve. Acknowledge the pain, sadness, and sense of loss that comes with this estrangement.
2. Don't pretend everything is well: It can be tempting to put on a brave face or pretend that the estrangement doesn't affect you, but it's important to be honest with yourself and others about your emotions. Give yourself permission to cry and express your feelings.
3. Seek support: Reach out to others who have experienced similar situations. Connecting with support groups, online communities, or therapy can provide guidance and solace in navigating through this difficult time.
4. Take control of your own life: While you can't control your adult child's behavior, you can make choices about how you respond and move forward. Focus on making sound decisions for yourself and finding ways to live happily and successfully, even in the midst of the estrangement.
5. Adopt coping strategies that work for you: Not every coping strategy will resonate with you, and that's okay. Find what works for you and discard what doesn't. It's important to take control of your own healing process and do what feels right for you.
6. Remember your strength: Going through the pain of an adult child's estrangement can be incredibly difficult, but remember that you have the strength to get through it. Believe in your ability to find acceptance, peace, and happiness in your own life, even if the relationship with your adult child remains strained.

5. Parenting Survival Guide: Handling the Stressful and Challenging Phases of Raising Teenage Boys

Handling the Stressful and Challenging Phases of Raising Teenage Boys
Introduction:
The previous section discussed the author's personal experience with their son's transition into adolescence and the flood of emotions that came with it. In this section, we will delve deeper into the challenging and stressful phases of raising teenage boys and provide practical advice on how to handle them.
Understanding the Negative Stereotypes and Common Behaviors:
Teenagers often get a bad reputation for their rude and self-centered behavior. If you find yourself facing statements like "No, you can't make me" or "Why don't you trust me?", you may be wondering what happened to your once adorable and adoring child. It's important to remember that these behaviors are common during this stage of development and do not necessarily mean you have failed as a parent.
Reassurance for Parents:
Parents may start questioning themselves and wondering if they are becoming redundant in their child's life. However, this is far from the truth. Despite their push for independence, teenagers still need their parents. They need a solid platform from which they can safely explore the world, a moral framework to guide them, and a role model to look up to. Your child needs to know that they matter, are loved, and have someone who has their back when they make mistakes.
The Role of Parents:
As parents, it is crucial to provide support and guidance to your teenage boys during this challenging phase. Although their behavior may be undesirable, it is important to remember that there are reasons behind it. Instead of taking their behavior personally, try to listen and understand their perspective. Teach them that the world does not revolve around them and that their actions have consequences. Encourage them to think for themselves, form their own opinions and values, and make responsible choices.
The Temporary Nature of This Phase:
It is important to recognize that this phase of teenage rebellion and disrespect is usually temporary. While it may feel like an eternity in the moment, most teenagers eventually outgrow these behaviors and mature into responsible adults. It's crucial to maintain open lines of communication, set clear boundaries, and provide a stable and supportive environment for your teenage boys.
Raising teenage boys can be challenging and stressful, but with the right approach and mindset, you can navigate through this phase successfully. Remember that your role as a parent is more important than ever during this time. Stay patient, understanding, and consistent in your approach, and soon enough, you will see your teenage boys grow into confident and responsible young men.

To Sum Things Up

Parenting teenage boys can be a rollercoaster ride filled with challenges, but with understanding and effective strategies, we can navigate these years together. By acknowledging and addressing the hormonal changes, balancing academics and hobbies, improving communication, coping with emotional disconnection, and utilizing a parenting survival guide, we can provide the support and guidance our teenage boys need. Remember, these challenges are a normal part of their development, and by being patient, empathetic, and open-minded, we can help our teenage boys grow into confident, independent, and successful individuals. So let's embrace the journey of raising teenage boys and celebrate the incredible young men they are becoming!Raising a teenage boy can be an exciting and rewarding experience, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges. As parents, we often find ourselves navigating through the hormonal changes, academic pressures, and emotional disconnections that come with the territory. Understanding and addressing these common challenges is crucial in providing the support and guidance our teenage boys need during this crucial phase of their lives. In this blog, we will explore some of the most common challenges parents face when raising teenage boys and provide strategies for effectively navigating these obstacles. Whether you're dealing with mood swings, academic struggles, communication barriers, emotional disconnection, or simply trying to survive the rollercoaster ride of parenting a teenage boy, this survival guide is here to help. So let's dive in and discover how we can navigate the teen years together!

This is kind of long so I’m sorry in advance but I seriously am begging for any support, suggestions, insight, personal experience stories, anything positive.
F26 - I have it all: vestibulodynia, on and off clitoral adhesions, keratin pearls (that have been removed), been thru 2 biopsies to figure out what is going on, 2 clitoral adhesions procedures.
Where I’m at currently: I had a clitoral adhesion procedure performed in February (my second one, first one was good and fixed the problem, second one was traumatizing and excruciating) and nothing has been the same since. My vulva stays in constant pain a burning/achy pain, but also a strange pain like there is weight holding it down, but that happened after the chronic clitoral pain. The top of my clitoris when touched is sensitive and not sensitive pleasure, sensitive hurting. An at the top of the labia minora just under the clitoris there is so much pain to touch. Wearing underwear, clothes, walking, running, sweating, basically anything causes so much pain. And strangely sometimes I can touché the clitoris and whole vulva area and it won’t hurt at all but once done being touched, then it hurts so much after.
My doctor at first thought it was another dermatological problem (because I have several) but it’s not a dermatological problem. I am currently in physical therapy and it doesn’t really cause me any relief.
My doctor is now suggesting PRP and of what I’ve heard and know, that doesn’t even work. I seriously just want to not be in chronic pain anymore. It’s been months and I don’t know what to do. I am positive it is nerve damage/pain which really scares me because how do you fix nerve pain??
Does anyone have any suggestions. I’ve found that laying on my side with a pillow between my legs really does help but I can’t do that all day and even tho it takes away the pain, the pain when touching the clitoris does not go away. I’ve tried creams, icing, stretching. I just want to know/ask if anyone has experienced this and has a solution.
I don’t have LS, I’ve been biopsied for that. I have a very rare type of dermatitis, but this is not a skin issue. I want to have sex again, but can’t because it just triggers so much pain. I just want to get thru the day without having to come home and rip my clothes off grab and ice pack and cry while I lay down just to get thru the rest of the day…

Hello, here is some context
Around April 10, I had symptoms of a yeast infection post-sex. I’ve been with my partner for a couple of months now and I’ve never experienced any breakouts before. On April 12-16 I realized I had 2 canker-sore like sores on my vulva. Exact location would be where the inner labia meets the clitoral hood. Was painful to wipe but honestly nothing major. I visited the gynecologist the next day, where I got swabbed and sent for testing.
Turns out I have HSV2. I have no idea if my partner gave this to me or if I just had it dormant within me (not on routine STD checks.)
I just have so many questions. My first outbreak would have been on those dates above. I never had a fever, or any other symptoms besides those 2 sores.
Does an outbreak need to be alongside fever symptoms? Has anyone experienced such a mild breakout? I’ve heard the first is the worst, but mine was yeast like symptoms. Should I get a second opinion? My sores went away the next day after visiting the gyno. My doctor recommended I use the medicine for when I am experiencing another breakout, does this mean I am at risk of infecting? Or how does this work?
Also, my partner has also never had an outbreak. However, a couple weeks back he said he was experiencing pain down there. Not burning or sores, I checked.

Hi all,
I hope you are well. I wondered if I could vent here and get your opinion on something as I feel I have been suffering with retroactive jealousy. (If it helps, I also have ADHD which sometimes really does not help me with emotional regulation.)
I (40M) have been with my partner (37F) for 8 months now and over the course of those months we have become official and have been getting on pretty well generally and have developed a real bond and connection, that has been like no other. Sex life has been amazing too, in fact, she’s been the best so far, she knows what she’s doing. And I can tell from experience she really digs me. She agrees with this when we are close and intimate.
The issues I have been facing are possibly because I have such strong feelings for her and this is bringing the issues to light.
Whilst we have been together we have spoken about sex a fair bit and her past has cropped up a few times, some of these things were down to me for asking, although mostly it was her just saying things that I really rather would not have heard, and as a result, since then, the thoughts torment me, and I am worried they will never go away, and I am also worried that I will be triggered in the future by things she says that will add to the pile.
Some examples of the things she has said:

• She couldn't do anal with a guy cos his dick was 'huge' (a negative story in some sense, and I personally am not insecure about mine, she also said he hurt her because of it during normal sex, as do sometimes I. Although I can't help think in some sense bigger is better, society, porn, female preference/aesthetics )
  
• She cum the most times with a guy (9 times), because he made her (she said she wouldn't do it herself 9 times as it is tiring, and I don't doubt she could do it with me as it was clitoral and she was on top where she can regularly go 3-4 times easy)
  
• Some guys in the past have made her too wet (although, I do too)
  
• She wondered how much cum she's swallowed in the past when there was speculation that it could be bad for you (she might've just been talking about me and her)
  
• She wondered how much baby oil she has ingested before, similar to above
  
• She has been with guys with 'great' bodies (although their personalities sucked, and I have a pretty good body too)
  
• She loved it when an ex slept with her despite her being on her period, he pulled her tampon out (not really fussed too much, although she said how confident she felt he was and my thoughts were that it doesn't make him confident, it just sounds like her kink which I have since found out it is)
  
• An ex liked her playing with his ass. (Not for me but again, too much info.)
  
• I mentioned a joke someone on the internet said about how many videos are on ex partners phones of girlfriends with big asses. She then said that she reckoned that there would be some out there on her exes phones of her.
  

Apologies for being so open about the details, and admittedly this all might sound pretty bad but I've tried to caveat what has been said with her and my explanations of context. I don't believe the intention was to hurt me with any of these things. But all together, it still paints only a partial picture of her past, where part of me cannot now help but feel inadequate and intimidated. I know that these are ultimately my insecurities that I have been wrestling with and wonder how much porn has played a part (I have been addicted), as well as my turbulent and abusive relationship with my mother.
I have read a few books, and listened to a few podcasts, meditated, written things down, but the thoughts and uncertainty hasn't faded as much as I'd like. (I'll admit though, writing this does help a little.) I wish I could just stop typing this and forget the whole thing and move forward and be happy in the present as I know it is the only thing that really exists. At times this issue causes me sexual anxiety with her.
I've felt at numerous times like I am at the stage where I am seriously considering ending the relationship to prevent further pain, even though in other ways, I feel like she could be 'the one'.
I also know she struggles with her own insecurities about the relationship, and I have actually apparently slept with more people than her. I am aware that she is worried i will leave her as she has been hurt before in the past.
I am not pressing her or prying her for further information, nor am I allowing it to affect our relationship negatively to the best of my ability. We have spoken a few times about this, she has apologised for being insensitive and has tried to reassure me multiple times, although I don't seek it. I definitely don't want to go further down this spiral or push her away in any toxic sense.
I do still wonder though, even if it is just my issue, why none of my other exes have been so open about their pasts, perhaps they have learned from their past not to be so open, whilst my current partner hasn't.
I’ll also add that I’ve hardly said anything about my past partners of a sexual nature, and when I have it has been because I was asked and I kept it minimal and respectful. Although perhaps, I have said stupid things too about relationships and how I have been a bit of a player, and this has caused her to try to get back at me or make herself feel better by filling in some things to make me feel just as bad or alleviate her own insecurities.
I’ll reiterate that I have heard many many coping mechanisms and strategies m, and some are great, but I still have the obsessive thoughts.
She has a great personality and she’s incredibly attractive and we do feel true love for eachother and I truly trust her. It’s just these things and potentially for her tendency in future to overshare, even though we have conversations and since set boundaries. Things have got better, although sometimes things still slip out.
Finally, I have a suspicion that this issue has spiked my blood pressure. I’m hoping not as I used to suffer with anxiety.
I am wondering if anyone has similar experiences and could offer any advice?
Thank you.

I’m literally looking for anyone else that may be going through the same thing as me. I’m 30, soon to be 31. As a teenager, around “that time of the month”, sometimes I’d get a pea sized lump “down there”, but it would eventually subside and I wouldn’t get another one for maybe 6-8 months. However, this past year, it has been nonstop. It seems like it doesn’t matter where I’m at, in my cycle, I KEEP cysts. Sometimes there are multiple—on my labia minora, on my clitoral hood, etc. They swell and become large and painful, they itch and it is super uncomfortable sitting, walking, anything! I went to the gynecologist last month about it. The LPN just KNEW it was HSV (Herpes). I was poked and prodded, swabbed for HSV and they sent a swab off to be cultured for a possible bacterial infection as well. At my follow up, I was informed that I was HSV negative, and that the bacterial swab showed normal flora and no infection. However, I was put on cephalexen for 7 days. A few days later, I had a dermatology appointment for perioral dermatitis, where I was prescribed Doxycycline Hyclate (oral) for a month. Between these two medications, EVERYTHING down there cleared up. I couldn’t believe it.. I was pain free, no itching, I could go back to shaving without being scared of nicking something, and I felt comfortable during sex—being fingered and touched, in general.
Fast forward a month, after about a month of relief, here we are again.. a large, painful cyst on my labia minora. I just got off the phone with Teladoc, and they’re prescribing me Doxycyline to take again. My concern, is that doxy is an antibiotic. I cannot take this long term. Has anyone been diagnosed with Fordyce adenitis (what I believe it to be), and if so, what type of treatment are you on for it?
This is getting out of hand. I just want the cysts to go away and never come back. I’ve switched to Dove gentle cleanser, I don’t use baby wipes down there, and I even stopped using my vibrator.
Thanks in advance. 🙃

Does the clitoral hood have multiple layers? I see all the diagrams online where it's the hood & then it's pulled back & there is a bulb. But when I pull my hood back, there is another hood that is attached to my clitoral bulb. Is this normal? I sometimes find hard white stuff that I need to work on extracting and it hurts. I've been concerned with clitoral adhesion in the past & recently saw on Instagram a doctor talking about addressing clitoral adhesions & how this treatment can help with vulvodynia. But she never showed what it looked like pre or post treatment.

Super TMI but this is the ‘do I have a cumpet’ sub.
Last time we did anything that could result in a child was April 8th.
I’m on birth control and I’ll admit, I’m not like, the Micheal Jordan of taking my birth control. I’m mainly on it to skip periods which usually only kinda works for me? I believe may have successfully skipped a single period this way. They’re usually shortish and extremely heavy (two days of spotting, one normal/lite, one where I can bleed through 1 normal flow tampon per hour, false stop, then a normal flow last huzzah)
Anyways around the 11th - 27th I experienced ??? Old blood discharge and extremely light and occasional bright pink spots but never a full period or anything heavy enough to warrant busting out a pad? This has finally stopped. I did also stop taking the birth control, and to my surprise wasn’t hit with a mega-Godzilla-period like I was the last time I stopped taking my birth control after using it to skip.
I’ve also had these weird urethral flutters but when I tried to google it, google made me feel like I was having a unique experience since all I found was stuff about painful bladder spasms that make you pee yourself. These didn’t hurt or even feel unpleasant, just jarring. Like they weren’t clitoral throbs or anything like that, and i didn’t pee myself when they happened? I don’t know.
Plus more frequent headaches, aches in general, and I had some nausea this morning but not enough to really raise the alarms over yknow?
Anyways thank you to anyone who reads this I’ve been anxious and scared for a bit and I finally had the courage to talk about it with my partner this morning and he think we’re fine but I’m still feeling so scared.

Using a throwaway account.
All my life I have been able to achieve an orgasm one type of way. I accidentally discovered it when I was an adolescent, and until this day I have not been able to make it happen with any other methods. I’m not sure how I could describe it, it’s somewhat close to humping; I basically squeeze an object, like a blanket or a pillow between my legs multiple times until it happens. It’s a very quick, easy and extremely pleasurable method for me. I want to achieve other ways to orgasm because this one is very impractical and limiting, visually embarrassing, and the curiosity about other masturbation methods and orgasming during sex is driving me nuts.
During masturbation, I have tried clitoral stimulation, fingering myself, using a vibrator, a dildo, and although all of these feel pleasurable, they just can’t get me there after any amount of time, not even combined. With my sexual partners I also tried possibly everything you could imagine. Fingering, oral sex, vaginal and anal penetration, and yet, nothing. I had multiple sexual partners, with varying skill sets and sizes, experimented with a bunch of positions and interesting ideas, but to no avail. During sex, my general pleasure level is very high, way more than in solo. There are moments where it feels as though I’m “close”, both during clitoral stimulation and vaginal penetration, but these moments could drag out forever and never evolve into an actual orgasm, the same with any type of masturbation.
I’m especially bothered because I have had a boyfriend for over 4 years now. I never discussed this issue with him because he does everything perfectly during sex and pleasures me very well (way more than past partners), and I know this isn’t his fault. I don’t feel embarassed by my “issue” per se, I just didn’t want to discuss it at the start of our relationship, and eventually I figured it would change (because our sexual life has been constantly improving). I honestly don’t even want to bring it up to him anymore, because our sexual life is literally so fantastic,even without. I am not even particularly bothered by the lack of my orgasming during sex (this being partially a reason why I never felt the need to bring it up), and also because I know he’d be hurt that I kept it a secret, especially because he’s always doing his best to pleasure me.
I am in no way bothered by my situation, because after all I can make myself orgasm (even if I don’t like the technique) and I would not be frustrated at all if my sexual life remained the way it is right now since it still brings me so much pleasure. Evidently though, sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I could orgasm in other ways and/or with a partner.
So I’m turning to you guys here, does/did anybody else have the same experience, and is there a way (and if so, what) to help it, or should I just keep masturbating in a way that pleasures me and accept that orgasming during sex isn’t a necessity if it still pleasurable?
Please excuse any grammatical errors, I am not a native English speaker.

Age: 31 Gender: female Weight: 55 kg Height: 165 cm
I was diagnosed with PID 2,5 weeks ago after having weird symptoms for 14 days. The cause was not an STD. Did several swabs within those weeks and everything came back negative. The OBGYN said that my IUD made the infection worse probably but that I had just bad luck getting this and I did nothing wrong. Got prescribed an antibiotics course of 14 days (doxicyclin and flagyl) which ended last thursday. In two days I will go back to the OBGYN (she wanted to see me because she was a bit worried), she told me there might be a possibility that she’s gonna take the IUD out. The symptoms got a lot better with the antibiotics but I still have mild pain in my uterus every other day. Is this normal or does this mean the infection is not healed yet? Some days I still have an urgency to pee more, while on other days it seems like it’s gone.
Of course my bf and I didn’t have sex for the past three weeks, I want to wait for the doctors approval, and I was wondering if there where people who had PID and when they were able to have sex again and if it hurt? I’m just worried I’m gonna have lasting effects from it. I did masturbate (only clitoral) which felt completely ok in the moment but the day after I got cramping in my lower abdomen again. Is this normal? It almost feels like my pelvic muscles are too tight. It’s really hard to distinguish where the pain is coming from exactly. Did I do something wrong with masturbating?
Does anyone have experience with the healing process of PID? I know I can ask the OBGYN in two days but I can’t stop worrying that I will never be normal again and have problems in my sex life for a long time, or have problems conceiving.

I was diagnosed with PID 2,5 weeks ago after having weird UTI symptoms for 14 days. The cause was not a STD. Did several swabs within those weeks and everything came back negative. The OBGYN said that my IUD made the infection worse probably but that I had just bad luck getting this and I did nothing wrong. Got prescribed an antibiotics course of 14 days (doxicyclin and flagyl) which ended last thursday. In two days I will go back to the OBGYN, she told me there might be a possibility that she’s gonna take the IUD out. The symptoms got a lot better with the antibiotics but I still have mild pain in my uterus every other day. Is this normal or does this mean the infection is not healed yet? Some days I still have an urgency to pee more, while on other days it seems like it’s gone.
Of course my bf and I didn’t have sex for the past three weeks or so, I want to wait for the doctors approval, and I was wondering if there where people who had PID and when they were able to have sex again and if it hurt? I’m just worried I’m gonna have lasting effects from it. I did masturbate (only clitoral) which felt completely ok in the moment but the day after I got cramping in my lower abdomen again. Is this normal? It almost feels like my pelvic muscles are too tight. It’s really hard to distinguish where the pain is coming from exactly.
Does anyone have experience with the healing process of PID? I know I can ask the OBGYN in two days but I can’t stop worrying that I will never be normal again and have problems in my sex life for a long time, or have problems conceiving.

I was diagnosed with PID 2,5 weeks ago after having weird symptoms for 14 days. The cause was not a STD. Did several swabs within those weeks and everything came back negative. The OBGYN said that my IUD made the infection worse probably but that I had just bad luck getting this and I did nothing wrong. Got prescribed an antibiotics course of 14 days (doxicyclin and flagyl) which ended last thursday. In two days I will go back to the OBGYN, she told me there might be a possibility that she’s gonna take the IUD out. The symptoms got a lot better with the antibiotics but I still have mild pain in my uterus every other day. Is this normal or does this mean the infection is not healed yet? Some days I still have an urgency to pee more, while on other days it seems like it’s gone.
Of course my bf and I didn’t have sex for the past three weeks or so, I want to wait for the doctors approval, and I was wondering if there where people who had PID and when they were able to have sex again and if it hurt? I’m just worried I’m gonna have lasting effects from it. I did masturbate (only clitoral) which felt completely ok in the moment but the day after I got cramping in my lower abdomen again. Is this normal? It almost feels like my pelvic muscles are too tight. It’s really hard to distinguish where the pain is coming from exactly.
Does anyone have experience with the healing process of PID? I know I can ask the OBGYN in two days but I can’t stop worrying that I will never be normal again and have problems in my sex life for a long time, or have problems conceiving.

TLDR: Does anyone have provoked vulvodynia where it ONLY hurts to orgasm and immediately following orgasm?
32 F - Following what was to be a standard LEEP procedure (burning off of precancerous cells on my cervix), I would up needing a Cone Biopsy instead (cells went deeper than initially thought). I wasn't to have anything inside my lady bits for 4 weeks until a check up on my cervix's healing. Upon check up I mentioned I'd used clitoral stimulation to orgasm and it was painful when I did, as all my Pelvic floor muscles tensed up. My Gyno then did a swab to ensure no precancerous cells were still present and it was very painful. I assumed it was simply because I hadn't been "opened" in 4 weeks...but he then poked and proded after mentioning the pain and everything he did hurt...and he diagnosed me with Provoked Vulvodynia, and Pelvic Floor Dysfunction. He prescribed me a cream and suppository and told me to use both for 2 weeks before attempting sex. Today I had sex for the first time with my partner in SIX LONG WEEKS! Sex wasn't painful, orgasm and just following orgasm was. My partner said my deeper vaginal canal was very tight throughout sex. Does anyone else have provoked vulvodynia where it ONLY hurts to orgasm? Pain is 7/10 and only lasts seconds to a minute.