New job wishes quotes

Denise Pilnak was a neighbor of Nicole’s. Her telephone bill shows she was on the phone from 10:25 PM and 10:28 PM. Prior to making this phone call, she and her friend noted how quiet the neighborhood was. Several minutes later between 10:33 and 10:35 PM, she testified that’s when she began to hear the sound of a barking dog, which is likely when the murders began. Allan Park testified to seeing OJ near the front door of the Rockingham estate at 10:55 PM, and his telephone records also document that. That leaves less than 25 minutes to commit the murders, drive back home, get rid of the evidence, etc.
Both Nicole and Ron had defensive wounds. Ron in particular was in hand to hand combat with whoever killed him, yet OJ had no injuries. The cut on his finger wasn’t seen by anyone who interacted with him at the airport, on the airplane ride to Chicago, nor when he immediately landed in Chicago. This includes people who got autographs from him, shook hands with him, and observed his hands. A broken glass was also found in his hotel room and it was documented he asked for a bandage at the hotel.
The FBI searched all of OJ’s and Nicole's credit card records and there was never any receipt found belonging to either of them that showed a purchase of Bruno Magli shoes. Every store that sold the shoes in the country was also searched, and they couldn't find anyone who sold him the shoes. The only proof of him owning them are the National Enquirer photos, which show him wearing suede shoes on a very rainy day. It was also found that the shoe soles that were said to be OJ's footprint were actually more popular than the prosecution maintained, the manufacturer sold the pattern to numerous shoe lines.
1.5 millimeters of OJ’s blood went missing from its vial. Thanos Peratis, the nurse who withdrew his blood, initially testified that he withdrew 8 millimeters. He took that back when only 6.5 appeared and the prosecution suggested he was mistaken. About a decade later he admitted to William Dear that he was certain he withdrew 8 millimeters because it was the amount he had drawn from patients all of his career, but he was close to retirement and had health problems so he didn’t want to cause any trouble.
The glove found at Bundy contained none of OJ’s DNA. The other glove found at Rockingham only contained his DNA in the area where Collin Yamauchi testified to spilling OJ's reference blood sample while handling it.
An identical knit cap matching the knit cap found lying on the ground next to one of the gloves was found in Nicole’s house. Those caps likely belonged to Sydney and Justin Simpson.
Two different people, John Meraz and William Blasini, encountered the Bronco at the lot where it had been impounded days after the murders. They both looked inside it for blood and testified they saw none. There was also only 1/8th of one drop of blood ever found inside it.
New York Times best selling author and journalist Stephen Singular was connected by an anonymous source within the LAPD about the case a few weeks after the murders. He was told Mark Fuhrman made an undocumented trip to Rockingham in the early morning hours after the murders looking for evidence that would incriminate OJ. Rosa Lopez, a housekeeper for OJ’s next door neighbor, testified to hearing men’s voices coming from the yard of Rockingham in the early morning.
The source told Singular that Fuhrman used a broken piece of fence from Bundy to pick up one of the two gloves found and placed it in a blue plastic bag. Next, he was told Fuhrman removed the glove from the plastic bag and planted it at Rockingham. A broken piece of fence was eventually found at Bundy and a blue plastic bag was found at Rockingham, and both were introduced as evidence in the trial.
He was also told EDTA would be found in some of the blood evidence if tested, lab technicians had mishandled OJ’s blood samples, vials of OJ’s, Nicole’s, and Ron's blood were in possession of an LAPD detective for several hours before being booked into evidence, and that Fuhrman had been acquainted with Nicole in some way.
Singular relayed this information from the source to the defense team and was in communication with them for awhile. Pretty much all of it checked out, including an investigation conducted by the LAPD's Internal Affairs Division which revealed that Fuhrman was overheard by other LAPD officers bragging about being intimate with Nicole and seeing her boob job before she was murdered.
There were 17 fingerprints lifted from the Bundy crime scene that didn’t belong to OJ or any of the police officers involved in the case.
Brett Cantor ran a nightclub called The Dragonfly where Ron worked for him as a waitepromoter. Nicole was also a regular at the club. He was murdered a year before them in almost exactly the same way, by being stabbed repeatedly in the upper body and being nearly decapitated. Judge Ito ruled the defense team could review his case. His murder remains unsolved.
Casimir Sucharski, a friend of OJ's, was murdered alongside two female companions in his house in Florida by people with machine guns two weeks after Ron and Nicole were murdered.
Michael Nigg was friends with Ron and also worked at the Mezzaluna restaurant. He was murdered a year later in 1995 by being shot in the head after refusing to give his money to two men outside an ATM. The men who shot him didn't end up taking his money. His murder remains unsolved.
Not saying these murders are necessarily related to each other but it does make you wonder since all of these people reportedly led similar lifestyles which involved the use of cocaine. Faye Resnick, a cocaine addict, was also living with Nicole just days before the murders.
If you listen to the full 1993 911 call, OJ was mostly yelling about drugs and hookers being in the house. When police officers responded to the call, Nicole told the responding officers that OJ hadn’t hit her in four years. After the 1989 domestic violence incident, OJ added an addendum to their prenuptial agreement which stated that if he struck Nicole again, she would‘ve been entitled to a settlement of more than 5 million dollars.
OJ wasn't scheduled to be in LA during that week. He had been busy working and made a last minute decision to come back for Sydney's recital. Video taken of him afterwards shows him in a good mood, kissing his kids and the Brown’s goodbye.
Christian Reichardt spoke with OJ on the phone an hour before the murders and testified his demeanor was jovial and not indicative of a simmering murderous rage.
His telephone records also show he made phone calls trying to set up dates with a few models, one of which he told he was unattached to anyone. If he was in a jealous rage over Nicole, why was he trying to date other women?
After the bodies were discovered, Sydney told the police she heard her mommy (Nicole) fighting & crying with her best friend (Faye Resnick) on the phone earlier that night.
Sydney was planning to have a sleepover that night with one of her friends. According to family and friends who attended the recital and dinner, OJ was aware of this. Committing a murder with all those extra witnesses and the possibility of having the kids hurt or things getting out of control, in addition to having a flight to catch, doesn’t make sense.

My boyfriend of 2 years and I had made plans a week ago to go out to the city yesterday and take cute couple photos, which was actually his idea to begin with. Our work schedules are pretty opposite. So, when we hang out any other day, it’s usually after work for me and it’s usually just dinner and hanging out for a couple of hours. I knew that this day with the photos would take a good chunk of our day and we both wanted to make sure we had plenty of time together. The only solution we could come up with would be to take the day off. I ended up taking the day off.
Well, yesterday morning, at 7am, he texts me saying he’s taking his sister to the ER and that we need to reschedule the original time we had planned. I responded saying “hope everything is okay, keep me updated”. And then I hadn’t heard from him all day. I called him, texted him and nothing. He then updates me, 9 hours later that his sister fell and hit her head. I expressed my concern and wished for her speedy recovery. I then asked him to call me when he had chance. He calls, and we talked for about 10 minutes. He said sorry for not saying anything and that his phone was on silent and didn’t want to talk to anyone and that he couldn’t focus on anything else.
I’m not mad that he couldn’t meet up, obviously his sister is injured, so he says. It’s the communication. He has actually used the ER excuse as a reason in the past when we had made plans. One time he claimed to have been in the ER for chest pain and didn’t tell me until midnight, claimed it’s too hard to think when you’re in that kind of situation. Another time, we were supposed to go on a birthday weekend getaway, he had gone to the ER and it had gotten canceled. One time he was supposed to see me, he claimed he needed to help his friend with something and couldn’t meet up. So, Idk, it seems weird something like this happens constantly when we have plans.
We actually broke up 3 months ago because of his communication problems. He didn’t talk to me for 10 days after losing his job, he basically acted like I didn’t exist to him and that he was dealing with his issues and that I shouldn’t be upset with him. I broke up with him for this. Then 2 months later, he reached out again, apologized for everything and promised to work on it and that he still loves me. I decided to give him another chance, and things were good, up until today.
What bothers me, is he knew I took the day off for us. I know technically it’s not a big deal, but I work in the medical field and hate taking days off unless absolutely necessary. He knows how I feel about my job. And then the whole disappearing act of not saying anything to me. Claimed to be not on his phone and was ignoring all calls. I’m sitting at home worried sick and he doesn’t even have the decency to take one minute out of his day to text me to update me. And considering the type of injury she had, he could’ve told me that I should go to work because he won’t be able to make it, but he basically had me sitting and waiting for him. This almost feels break up worthy for me. I’m not sure if I’m overreacting though.
Tldr: bf and I made plans to go take photos in the city then he proceeded to not say anything to me for an entire day. He had to take his sister to the hospital and said we would reschedule for a later time, making it seem like we would meet up, but he didn’t. He has used the ER excuse before and has had communication issues which upsets me so much whenever it occurs

I’ve been working as a customer service desk at a retail store, basically they started expecting more from me such as grabbing them food & not paying for my gas running around different places for food for my coworkers, as i am not a uber eats, so i declined.
They also approved working from 37 hours to 31 hours, but now it “isn’t okay.”
Anywho, i saw my job online. I talked to my boss and she said they won’t kick me to the curb and let me go and i’m fine. She said not to worry, but i have a supervisor that complains after everything i do after i stood up to her from calling me stuck up. I’m worried that she’ll have more power over the boss since she’s been at this company for almost 30 years, and my boss is somewhat new and doesn’t really know what is going on half the time.
I do my job, and i do it well, but just a bit confused, they might be hiring someone else for my position for extra help, i’m still paranoid they’ll let me go since they’re acting strange.

I have been documenting my salaries in my official receipts. However, I have been unemployed for the past two months. Is it acceptable to skip dates on the receipts since I had no job during that period? I have now started a new job.
Please answer me to those who know since I have to pass this tomorrow because of that changes they announced.

I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir, but this job market makes life feel so bleak. All that work and money spent just to be turned away. I'm not necessarily the most accomplished person in the world, but I know that I'm very talented and capable.
Not even referrals have worked. We as workers have such little leverage.
I'm not mad or sad anymore, just numb. I'm grateful for what I have and my parents, I take solace in that. Wish I could just hunt and gather lol

Not sure how much traction this is going to get, but if any of you are planning on creating a separate account between business and personal purchases, I would advise against this.
This all started a couple days ago when I started looking into being tax-exempt for resale purchases. I've had an account with eBay for a little over six years at this point and 130+ transaction, so certainly not big, but big enough to not cause any concerns. I went ahead and submitted forms for my state to get tax-exemption status. Took a couple hours but I was able to hear back from a rep that I was now exempt. They also stated that since the whole account would be exempt, any non-exempt purchases should be taken care of on a different account. I figured "No big deal, right?" Wrong.
I went about with creating a different account, all information being identical to my old account with the email address being the only difference, everything was smooth and I had no issues whatsoever. Fast forward to this morning, I get a peculiar email stating that my account is permanently suspended due to "Activity that we believe was putting the eBay community at risk." Their exact quotes. I initially thought this was a mistake and got in contact with chat support when I arrived home. That rep was little to no help, and they stated essentially the same thing, and when I asked for further clarification they told me they couldn't help as they "Don't want policy to be circumvented or manipulated by anyone."
This was a more definitive answer, but I figured I'd have a shot with a phone call, so I went through all the processes of contacting them and spoke with one of the heads on suspensions. She stated to me that the suspension was true and any new account creation would end up getting suspended as well. Refused to tell me what the reasoning was behind it as well when I asked what suspicions could be concluded from an account that was just created a day earlier and the fact that I've had an account in perfect standing for 6+ years. She then proceeds to tell me "Well, the other account could end up getting permanently suspended as well." HOW!?? I simply did what another rep told me to do, and now I'm punished for it??
If anybody has any ideas on what I can even do further in this situation, I'm all ears.
IDK if I'm done with this site in its entirety but its asinine on how it treats some of its members.

Why did Oriental Trading Company have to take their neon smiley face stress balls and 1.), make them way smaller, 2.), make them harder to squeeze by changing the consistency of the foam to make it harder, and 3.), have this sticky, ticky-tacky coating on the outside? They took an iconic stress ball that has existed for well over 25+ years and ruined it. I wish they could go back to the old way of making their stress balls/stim toys. I would gladly pay more for that. Did y'all ever go through companies either discontinuing, or doing a horrible redesign of a good stim toy? It's like when companies simplify their logos too much. Like, no one asked for this. They didn't even change the photo to reflect the changes. Yikes. Too bad they didn't bring some of us in for a focus group before crapping the bed with that poor redesign of the stress balls. RIP, neon smiley face stress balls. You will be sorely missed. Off to find a new one that works, but it won't be the same.

:blue_heart:Project Genesis:blue_heart: We are a serious roleplay community with a focus of creating an environment that everyone will enjoy. We community driven and open to suggestions. We are a small and welcoming community that offers something for both new and experienced players! Our goal is to have a fun and create an immersive environment for everyone. We have an active development team that strives to create an amazing experience for everyone by constantly putting out updates and fixes. We have an experienced staff team that is always willing to help and are quick to help.
Our BEST Features * Custom Scripts * Custom Clothing & Tattoos * Amazing Police Vehicles * Amazing Police & EMS Liveries * Player Owned Businesses * Police MDT * Legal & Illegal Jobs * Unique Jobs * XP Based Jobs * Hidden Illegal Activities * 18+ Emotes & Activities * Go Karts * DJ Booths & Car Radios * Functional Pool Tables * TONS of Criminal Activities & Heists * Unique Housing * Financing For Houses and Cars! * Experienced Development Team * Dedicated & Experienced Staff * …and a lot more!
Unique Interiors: * Ammunations * 24/7 Shops * NEW Police Station * Unique Pillbox Hospital * Burger Shot * Casino * UwU Cafe * Bahama Mama's * Bennys Motorworks * Fatboys Mechanic Shop * Premium Deluxe Motors * Luxury Dealership * White Widow * Pet shop * …and so much more!
Join our discord and check out some pictures, clips, and teasers! When you are ready hit that connect button! Which life will you choose… Civilian? Law Enforcement? Medical Services? Or the Gang life?
https://discord.com/invite/cMbRrXrW2y

Hi,
I recently switched jobs (I live in Idaho state) and my new employer health insurance is about to kick in. I currently use Omnipod 5 with dexcom G6, and novolog. With my new employer funded health insurance(Regence), it is looking like none of my supplies are going to be covered until I meet my deductible (about 3300), and then I will still have to pay 50% coinsurance until I meet my out of pocket limit which is 8k. I can’t afford this as most people probably wouldn’t be able to, I’m looking at thousands of dollars a month. Does anyone have any recommendations for supplemental coverage or getting supplies covered in ID? I am mentally preparing myself to have to go back on injections, but trying to avoid that. Any advice helps.

Hi,
I recently switched jobs (I live in Idaho state) and my new employer health insurance is about to kick in. I currently use Omnipod 5 with dexcom G6, and novolog. With my new employer funded health insurance(Regence), it is looking like none of my supplies are going to be covered until I meet my deductible (about 3300), and then I will still have to pay 50% coinsurance until I meet my out of pocket limit which is 8k. I can’t afford this as most people probably wouldn’t be able to, I’m looking at thousands of dollars a month. Does anyone have any recommendations for supplemental coverage or getting supplies covered in ID? I am mentally preparing myself to have to go back on injections, but trying to avoid that. Any advice helps.

I decided to post this because I'm starting to question my self about whether I am in the wrong or not. Some context here is that my father can be an A-Hole slot and sometimes it's just unbelievable and unbearable. An example of this would be today I went to the kitchen where I saw my sister, mother and father hearing up finner, I asked them if they are only starting to eat now since I had been told dinner was ready an hour ago, so I had already eaten. My father immediately snapped at me and told me to shut up. He does this a lot and most of the time I take it as a joke since he says it as a joke alot. He then shoved me with his shoulder a little when I was grabbing the water jug out of the fridge to have a glass of water. I turn on the tap and tun my hands under cold water for around 30 seconds to make my hands cold. He wasn't wearing a shirt so I put my cold hands on his back and made him flinch forward anthen he turned around and yelled at me, he said and I quote "I work in the heat all day so my body is hot, I hate having cold on my body, I never do that to you so if you ever do that again I'm gonna send you flying!". He completely lied about not doing it to me, hes done it to me more than I have with him and when I have done it before he even laughed about it. My mother said nothing about it and my sister was even smiling when I did it because we do stuff like that alot in our house and most of the time im the victim and I only ever do it when someone does it to me or in this case when I was the only one being bullied, which happens a lot actually which has given me and my mother the feeling that my sister is my dads favourite, we have talked about it before since there was one time where I made a joke to my father that my sister made the day before and when i said it he flipped out on me and wouldnt talk to me or cook dinner for us for a week, which he does a lot so my mother had to cook for us when my father does it usually. My father in my eyes is essentially a man child, he thinks he knows everything and he acts like he is some gangster or something since he lived on the streets for a year. He does work out a lot so hes big but there are sometimes where I wish he would just get layed out on his ass by someone so he could realize hes just a regular guy who works out not some professional fighter. He's also sometimes violent too. An example would be onetime when he borrowed my sisters IPad and I told him to put it in her room when he's done with it and when he was done with it he asked me to put it away to which I said no since my sisters room was next to his room and my room was on the other side of the hallway plus he was going to bedroom so he could just put it there on his way to bed. He demanded I do it and I sighed asking why to which he got in my face push me into the wall and cracked my sister's IPad case and then when I was in tears a bringing it to my sisters room he kicked me in the butt and it hurt so I cried which woke up my mother and caused an arguement. I understand him getting mas over me talking back but at that time I feel he went to far. I still feel like I care about him but there's i lot of times where I want to beat the shit out of him but I know I can't because Im not strong enough and I would only be able to do so with a weapon of some sort but I never do mainly because I dont want to ruin my life over someone like him. I also don't want to because he is the main income of the family and I don't want to screw over my sister or mother because I care about them. Sometimes I think he loves me because he says so but then he will go full 180 and yell at me over pointless stuff. So AITA or is my father an A-Hole?

As of this week, I have just cleared over half a million dollars gross from working online. I will first start this by saying that I am both extremely lucky and have found myself in a position that most people never will. I acknowledge both of those facts and and am very grateful, but I say that to outline that my story is probably not something that most people can replicate. While that is true, it is also true that there is still success and money to be made working online if you focus on multiple different facets of making money and diversify your time, energy, and resources. I still invest around 40 hours a week to these side hustles on top of my 9-to-5.
I started my work online journey in the middle of 2018 just clicking around. At the start I was only really making a few hundred bucks a month and investing maybe 20 hours here and there. As time went on I got deep into the online work world and picked up more hours, as well as some fully remote jobs that I was doing at home after my day job. I have been blessed in not having any desire for hobbies other than making money. I have continued to grow and build on my core competencies and have streamlined what I work best at, focusing on that still everyday.
I want to acknowledge that a big portion of these earnings are from click through over the course of the six years I've been doing this. I wrote a pretty successful post on Reddit that kind of blew up all over the Internet, and to date has gotten over 10 million views. I would probably say from all the money I have made working online, about 25% is from this alone. I sincerely appreciate each and every person that has clicked on any of those, and I hope I have provided enough individual information to make your individual contribution to me worthwhile.
Other than this I would say the next biggest portion is from what I do on the lending subreddit borrow. I won't disclose specific numbers on there but it makes up for an equally large chunk. There is definitely inherent risk in this and it is not meant for everybody but I have found it to be extremely successful and one of the better Investments of time and money out of all of my working online endeavors.
About 30% has come from all of the stuff that I list in my work online guide and just hustling and hitting the internet every day and finding work. I am still investing a substantial amount of time doing online work and always looking for new revenue streams and ways to make money.
On top of all this I have other side hustles that I do in person that involve going and picking up stuff that is listed for free on Craigslist, Offer Up, or very cheap on other bidding websites, cleaning up or improving the items that I get, and reselling for a good amount of profit. My biggest money maker has been furniture.
All of this is definitely not for most people but I feel like I have found several good revenue streams that fit for my personality that have allowed me to thrive working online in ways I never would have imagined when I first started back in 2018. I wish you all luck.

I have a career which requires certification in each individual state. I recently moved and am seeking certification in my new state. One of the requirements for certification in my new state is for me to send official transcripts from all schools attended to my current state. The school that I need the transcript from is where I did my certification courses and also took a few unrelated masters-level classes. The transcript I need is for the completed certification courses which I did pay for and complete. The course that I dropped and did not pay for is one of the unrelated masters-level classes. Apparently I dropped it after the deadline? I did not know this, as I hadn't yet been required to pay anything. I never received any sort of grade for this course nor do I need it on my transcript. My old school is now placing a hold on my transcript because they claim that I owe them over $1000 for the course that I dropped. I cannot afford to pay this.
Is there anything I can do? The school's financial office has been incredibly unhelpful and rude. I already have a job lined up but need my certification before I can begin.

I've been having consistent issues with brain fog, weakness, fatigue, occasional blurry vision, recent gain in body fat for the first time in my life (nothing severe), general malaise, and some gastro symptoms among others. Some days are better than others, but it's always present to some degree.
My main question is what kind of doctor will actually listen to me? My GP basically shrugs when I bring this up and says "all blood tests we've ran have come back within range, probably just anxiety". I will concede that anxiety is a possible answer, but I don't notice a correlation between my symptoms and feeling anxious beforehand. Most of the time when my symptoms are present I don't feel anxious at all.
I'm not taking any current medications, and quit drinking 7 months ago when all of these symptoms were at their worst. I was a very heavy drinker for 7 years give or take, so I tend to lean toward B12 deficiency or liver issues since those seem to be the most likely. Problem is all my blood work indicates my liver is functioning normally, and I haven't been tested for B12 (yet). I have also likely ruled out hypothyroidism.
Any theories are welcome, my current ones are hyperparathyroidism (consistently high blood calcium levels which my doc is not concerned about), B12 obviously, GAD, cirrhosis (fuckin hope not, I'm only 26), and long covid. Covid would be odd though, because as far as I am aware I haven't had it since 2021, before these symptoms began. My issue with the anxiety DX is that I feel my brain fog is CAUSING me anxiety, not the other way around.
I'm posting in this sub since brain fog is by far my most profound and debilitating symptom, and I assume many of you have sought medical treatment for it. My new jobs insurance kicks in next month, so I thought I'd look into what my best course of action could be. The sheer amount of effort I have to put into every aspect of work/life in general is nowhere close to what it used to be for me. Something's up. I feel like I'm in some hellish purgatory and just want answers.
In the meantime I'll keep showing up to work until I fucking collapse, because losing this job means being uninsured, which means no more access to medical care.

After working in the service industry all throughout undergraduate and after graduating, I went back to school for my MSW, where I lasted a semester and had to leave due to a mental health crisis. My resume for social services has six months of volunteer sexual assault hotline work, and six months of my internship at a homelessness drop-in center. My internship was a nightmare--I was there for six months, and six people quit within that time. There was no guidance from the supervisors on how to do anything, and it was mostly the newly hired people with minimal experience leading one another. After seeking treatment, I have been applying to jobs in the field, and I am flat out terrified that if I start working for another agency like my internship, I will have another full on mental breakdown. So far I have turned down a methadone clinic that wanted me to start the next day, and a case manager position at a shelter. Today I interviewed for a "Counselor" position at a Victims Services Center whose Linked In shows that they're hiring perpetually--6 postings for the same job within the past year and a half. I couldn't get a straight answer about just how often I'd be on call for the hotline in my off hours. I would be doing counseling with a caseload of 15-18 victims of violence, in addition to manning the hotline, and accompanying clients to the hospital / courthouse. My "backup" job is a day treatment program for elderly folks over 55, where I would be a "Psychiatric Rehabilitation Counselor," that is, maybe lead a group or two, meet with the clients individually to see how they're doing, and just kind of hang out. I worry that this kind of job won't be pushing me to grow as a social worker, and that I should take the leap into something more involved. However, I'm EXTREMELY new to the field, terrified of burnout, and kind of want out already--I am waiting to hear back from a paralegal position at a legal aid clinic that feels like it could just pull me out of this mess that has become my life. Would y'all just bite the bullet, ignore the red flags, and dive in ? Or take the safer position even though it might provide less experience ?

I had to go on a trip for work last week. First time for me in the state/city and quite far from where I live.
I normally have travel anxiety (hate planes), but the prep for this trip was so emotionally loaded. I’ve been at this job since November (my partner died in September). It was so hard going through another milestone without him.
Not to mention I had to leave my dog with friends. Any time we traveled, either we’d take the dog with or one of us would stay home with him. This dog is all I have left of our relationship. He’s the most precious of precious to me. I cried when I said goodbye to head to the airport.
My partner would’ve talked me out of my anxiety spirals and stress about the trip. But I had to deal with it and get through by myself.
When I got to my hotel, I was stunned. Had a beautiful view from my room. And I just wished so much that I could share it with him. Or at least call.
It ended up being a great and very fun work trip. I’m so proud of myself for getting through it, realizing most of my anxiety was just working myself up. And having a good time (productive too!)
I just…I just wish he could’ve been here for me to talk to about it. And that emptiness aches so much.

16-minute read.

pro-West party leader says they met PM Pashinyan and discussed a referendum to solidify Armenia's shift to EU

KHZMALYAN (European Party of Armenia): The referendum is our suggestion and demand. We presented it to Pashinyan and expect a response within a reasonable timeframe. We advised making a public statement soon. A referendum would also make Pashinyan's job easier by allowing the people's will to decide Armenia's direction.
REPORTER: How did Pashinyan respond?
KHZMALYAN: He suggested the meeting be held in a closed format so I can't reveal all details. We hope that our voice, our offer, our demand, was heard. If we do not receive a positive response, we will take measures by employing the same methods currently used by anti-European forces [the ongoing protests led by pro-Russian ex-regime]. We will take to the streets and demand a referendum for Eurointegration if necessary.
REPORTER: How long are you ready to wait before taking action?
KHZMALYAN: A few months. Georgia will hold parliamentary elections in October, and Moldova will hold a similar Eurointegration referendum - also in October. The U.S. will hold presidential elections in November which will be important for Armenia's future. Even if the worst scenario unfolds in all three countries, Armenia must stand firm and not take a step back. Armenia could become the leader in democracy in all of Eastern Europe if you consider the situation in Georgia, Hungary, and Slovakia [pro-Russia populist leader]. Armenia could receive an unprecedented level of assistance from Europe under those circumstances.
REPORTER: Did Pashinyan say he plans to leave CSTO?
KHZMALYAN: We did not demand specific dates but we urged him to complete all these processes this year, preferably by November.
REPORTER: Did Pashinyan agree?
KHZMALYAN: The participants of the meeting are under the impression that we were able to present convincing arguments but time will show what actions he takes. The government functions very poorly but nevertheless, they are doing something, they are taking steps.
REPORTER: On May 9, Bagrat Galstanyan gave Pashinyan 1 hour to resign but it's May 21 and he is still here. Why wasn't the opposition able to remove him?
KHZMALYAN: The 3 former presidents and their surrogate forces, backed by 30 years of power, were unable to bring forward a figurehead, a single ideology, that could win the hearts of the people. They used various political technologies, they switched between black and white robes, and they extended the 1 hour to 7 days, but none of that helped because the Armenian people hate them more than they hate Nikol Pashinyan.
REPORTER: You used to be a lot harsher on Pashinyan but something appears to have changed in your tone after your recent meeting with him. What is the reason?
KHZMALYAN: We were able to present our demands and the timelines to accomplish them. Unlike the archbishop and the former regimes surrounding him, we did not give "one hour" for Pashinyan to accept our demands; we did not make ultimatums. We believe the current government is carrying out and will carry out the will of the people to overcome the status of a Russian colony and join the ranks of free nations. We did and do see steps [taken by the government] towards this; we cannot ignore this. We saw the Strassbourg, but also Moscow. We saw the [April 5 meeting in] Brussels, but also [the recent meeting between FMs in] Almaty. We are told this is an attempt to "balance" and we understand where they are coming from, but our factions speak on behalf of over 60% of Armenians who view Russia's policies as deadly for Armenia. We expect concrete actions and we have formed a platform to continue this work; there will be petitions and other actions from us. We are ready to assist Pashinyan, who may be constrained due to ongoing negotiations, by being the public voice and saying the things he cannot say. We will continue to work, to pressure, to influence, to demand. Our meetings also continue abroad. We will press on until we reach our goal - the Eurointegration of Armenia. //
Several prominent Western-oriented political parties recently formed an alliance to promote Armenia's Eurointegration.
video,

Pashinyan appoints a ruling party member as a deputy head of the newly formed Foreign Intelligence Service - the Armenian "CIA"

After the 2020 war, Pashinyan said Armenia will need a modern intel agency to gather information and analyze foreign threats, while the NSS -- described as historically a "pro-Russian" agency by many -- will focus on internal matters.
source,

Pashinyan met the deputy head of the United States CIA to discuss bilateral, international, and regional issues

A delegation led by David Cohen is in Yerevan. Cohen also met NatSec Armen Grigoryan.
source, source,

Armenia's Investigative Committee chief hosted U.S. Deputy Assistant Secretary in the Bureau of International Narcotics and Law Enforcement Affairs

Qyaramyan and Yoder discussed bilateral cooperation, the recent retraining for Armenian agents and technical assistance, cooperation between law enforcement agencies of Armenia and the United States, anti-narcotrafficking, and the fight against gender-based violence.
Yoder also met Armenia's Interior Minister Ghazaryan to discuss the ongoing police reforms and formation of new divisions, the fight against narco-trafficking, technical assistance for rescuers, and retraining courses. Yoder emphasized effective cooperation, noting that the achievements within the framework of sectorial reforms are exceptional. The US wants to expand the agenda of cooperation.
source, source,

Armenian army officers continue to take part in NATO exercises titled Regex 2024 held in Moldova

GOOGLE TRANSLATE: The exercise is organized with the support of the NATO Joint Forces Command in Naples, Italy, and aims to train the military according to Western standards for planning and conducting exercises, crisis management, strengthening and assessing the level of interoperability of forces in a multinational environment.
We remind you that the exercise "Regex 2024" consists of several workshops during the current year. The first workshop took place between February 16 and March 1, and the second between 22 − April 26, 2024. //
source, source,

NATO and Armenia strengthen cooperation in defense education

Armenia's defense ministry representatives recently visited NATO headquarters to discuss NATO’s Defence Education Enhancement Programme (DEEP) for Armenia.
NATO: The DEEP programme is an excellent tool to support Armenian military education system reforms and strengthen the country’s cooperation with NATO.
ARMENIA: With the support of DEEP experts we implemented major changes in all levels of our educational curriculum at Military Academy, starting from cadets up to the most senior levels. It helped us to establish cooperation with many international partner institutions.
source,

Armenia is an emerging destination for UK and global investors: Armenia's Ambassador to London Business Matters

👔 Armenia is committed to building a knowledge-based, export-oriented, and inclusive economy.
👔 Armenia is diversifying its growing economy with pioneering sectors, creating ample investment opportunities.
👔 Armenia’s investment legislation grants equal treatment to foreign investors
👔 There are no restrictions on remittances and repatriation of profits, free exchange of foreign currencies and no limitations on staff recruitment
👔 The country’s favorable business climate and ‘open-door’ policy is also reflected in international reputable rankings where Armenia is ranked one of the highest in the region.
👔 Although Armenia has a relatively modest internal market, it offers different models of economic cooperation and serves as a gateway to major world markets
👔 Armenia has maintained a high level of cooperation with the EU through CEPA
👔 Armenia and UK will soon have a CEPA-like agreement
full article, source,

Turkey modernizes an Azerbaijani Su-25ML jet with guided bombs and Teber missiles

It uses KGK laser guidance for missiles and increases the reach to 110 km.
source,

Pashinyan's Chief of Staff hosted the French Ambassador to discuss defense, economy, infrastructure, and humanitarian topics

... also the upcoming events dedicated to the 100th anniversary of Charles Aznavour.
source,

Parliament Speakers of Armenia and Ukraine discuss the situation in the South Caucasus and Ukraine

source,

Q&A with ruling party MP Vahagn Alexanyan about the ongoing protests led by pro-Russian opposition

REPORTER: You continue to criticize the "holy movement"...
ALEXANYAN: The what now?
REPORTER: ... the "holy movement", by calling it a "pagan" movement. What is the ruling party's stance and do you discuss this internally?
ALEXANYAN: Of course we do, although I don't think Kocharyan's decision to name this movement "holy" is helping them. It's comical.
REPORTER: Do you have proof that Bagrat srbazan is [tied with Kocharyan]?
ALEXANYAN: Bagrat Galstanyan is surrounded by the entire political team of Robert Koharyan, he was a member of Kocharyan's 2022 protests and gave similar speeches he gives today, he received a praise from Russian propagandists, and he was named by a Russian propagandist Aram Gabrielyanov as a potential candidate for a new protest movement just a few months prior to these events, so it's beyond reasonable doubt that Bagrat Galstanyan is part of Kocharyan's team.
REPORTER: You were earlier accusing Galstanyan of being a Russian agent, and now Kocharyan's agent?
ALEXANYAN: Same thing.
REPORTER: The opposition gathered many thousands of supporters on May 9. What does the size of the crowd indicate?
ALEXANYAN: It was similar to Kocharyan's final rally before the 2021 elections. And?
REPORTER: The opposition created a video of "Pashinyan's lies" and broken promises. Will you respond?
ALEXANYAN: The clip itself is a lie and manipulation. For example, one of the supposed lies was Pashinyan's promise of an amnesty for overdue fines and penalties. You are a journalist, you tell me, was there an amnesty or not?
REPORTER: Pashinyan had also said that POWs could wait "just a few more months" and that he wouldn't "sacrifice Armenia's sovereignty" in exchange for bringing them back sooner. Why aren't they back?
ALEXANYAN: Dozens of POWs returned home in December, and efforts continue to bring back the rest. Literally 1-2 days before the POWs' return, the opposition claimed that the POWs were "forgotten" by the government. "Ոչ մի բան չեք անում:"
REPORTER: What about the Nagorno-Karabakh leadership?
ALEXANYAN: There are efforts to return them as well.
REPORTER: Why did the police form a wall to block entry to village Kirants [for nonresidents]?
ALEXANYAN: I think the NSS said they had to take action to prevent interference with the border work. From what I can tell, the protest leader himself went there yesterday and returned only 15 minutes later so there wasn't a big desire to stay there apparently.
REPORTER: They plan to hold a big rally on May 26 where they might nominate Bagrat srbazan as the PM's candidate to replace Pashinyan.
ALEXANYAN: Why not go straight for [alleged narco baron] Mihran Poghosyan [who publicly praised the protests]?
REPORTER: There appears to be a consensus around Bagrat srbazan after a meeting between several forces.
ALEXANYAN: Consensus minus one, where "minus one" is the people. Or to be more precise, "minus two", because the Constitution also prohibits Bagrat from serving as a prime minister. Congratulations on an initiative that's dead on arrival. It's absurd. They suggested replacing the Constitution to allow a dual citizen to serve as PM. Okay... To get Canadian citizenship you have to take an oath to serve the best interests of Canada. To allow dual citizens to serve as PM in Armenia we have to accept for the PM to have loyalty towards another state. The alternative is for the candidate [Bagrat] to admit that his word [oath to Canada] wasn't worth a dime. Երևի մատերը խաչ արած ա երդվել։
REPORTER: But don't you think you are manipulating because Galstanyan received Canadian citizenship just to be able to serve in the church in Canada? He didn't go there to live or conduct business.
ALEXANYAN: It doesn't matter why he went to Canada. He is a citizen of Canada and took an oath. Even religious leaders with dual citizenship cannot become prime ministers. I don't have an issue with him being a dual citizen, but it limits his office options. He still hasn't renounced his Canadian citizenship even after all these talks about a possible nomination.
REPORTER: Galstanyan said he is ready to renounce it as soon as there is a need for it.
ALEXANYAN: In other words, he seeks "guarantees" that he will be the candidate in order to renounce it?
full,source, source,

opposition churchman Bagrat Galstanyan demands the Armenian government compensate the damage done to the church during USSR and "return" the properties "legally belonging" to the church

This was said as a response to the critics of the church leadership who accused the church of turning into a political party and suggested taxing the church like a business.
BAGRAT: We have 19th-century churches that were forcefully confiscated and turned into ruins. The properties of the Armenian church must be returned to the church. The area of Moscow Cinema belongs to the church, half of the Katoghike Church was demolished and belongs to the church, and part of the items in Matenadaran were taken away from the church. Instead of threatening us with taxes, they must think about how they plan to return our properties, fully renovated and ready for service.
source,

the church is actually paying taxes but they do have some exemptions

The church paid $1 million in income taxes last year.
There are tax exemptions to import certain goods deemed for charity. They also don't pay property tax, and taxes on income generated from the sales of ceremonial accessories. The latter two are the frequent targets of church critics.
source,

Armenia's Constitutional Court has a vacant seat. Pro-Russian opposition criticizes Pashinyan's ruling party for favoring a "George Soros-linked" judge who worked for U.S. State Department.

A Serj-era judge is leaving the Constitutional Court after receiving a job offer elsewhere so one seat is vacant. It is the judiciary's turn to nominate a CC judge, so hundreds of judges recently held a meeting and voted for Judge Balayan as their candidate. Balayan's father was a CC judge during Kocharyan's tenure. He was accused in the Wikileaks report of having inappropriate deals with President Kocharyan. Pashinyan's ruling party did not vote to approve Balayan. This led to a second gathering of hundreds of judges where they voted to nominate Judge Khachaturyan as their candidate. The parliament summoned him for Q&A on Tuesday.
SPEAKER: We invite the representative of the judiciary to present their nominee for CC.
JUDICIARY REP: 267 judges voted. Judge Davit Khachaturyan, a member of the Criminal Chamber of the Court of Cassation, won the majority votes.
2000-2005: [blah blah blah]
2003-2006: Legislative Assistance Project Manager at Southern Caucasus Anti-Drug (SCAD) Program, sponsored by European Union and implemented by United Nations Development Program
2006: Program Assistant at U.S. Embassy in Armenia, Bureau for International Narcotics and Law Enforcement Affairs (INL)
2007-2013: U.S. Embassy in Armenia, U.S. Department of Justice (DOJ), Legal Specialist
2014: Academy of Justice of the Republic of Armenian-Russian, Vice-Rector and Lecturer
2015-2016: Council of Europe Office in Yerevan, Program “Strengthening Health Care and Human Rights Protection in Prisons in Armenia”, Legal Expert
2016: EU project “Development and Strategic Studies”, Expert on Judiciary and Human Rights field reforms
2015-2017: EU project “ENP Progress Reports and Assessment Reports on Armenia´s Compliance with GSP+ obligations”. Expert on Rule of Law/Justice.
2013–2020: Law Faculty of Yerevan State University. Lecturer. Development and teaching of courses for the Master Program: “European Standards for the human rights protection in criminal proceedings”, and “Professional Skills of a Lawyer”
etc.
OPPOSITION MP: The ruling faction earlier chose not to confirm the appointment of Judge Davit Balayan; they obviously prefer Davit Khachaturyan. Can you explain why you didn't mention that Khachaturyan served on the board of directors and later as the president of the board at George Soros's Armenia-based Open Society Foundations? How will this record impact his work at CC?
JUDICIARY REP: I presented parts of his professional activities available on the court's public platforms. You can ask the candidate directly.
OPPOSITION MP: The Soros Foundation publicly listed him as a member so I don't understand why it's being hidden now. In your opinion, how will his work at the Soros Foundation affect his impartiality?
JUDICIARY REP: The majority of judges chose him and it's up to Parliament whether to confirm or reject.
RULING MP: Was the voting held in a closed session or can you see how each judge voted?
JUDICIARY REP: It's a closed format. My duty here is to present the candidate. [basically, leave me alone I'm just doing my job]
RULING MP: Why not make the court voting and internal discussions more transparent for the public to see so we will have fewer conspiracy theories on why one judge was preferred over the other?
JUDICIARY REP: I share the view that it needs to be as public as possible but the majority of judges voted to keep the session closed to the press.
RULING MP: Just because the discussions and the vote were behind closed doors that doesn't mean it was anti-democratic, but still, it's better to publicize the process. We hope to see a change in this approach.
JUDICIARY REP: The ballot casting will always be secret and I think that's the right approach in order to allow judges to express themselves without constraints, but I agree that the discussions and speeches should be public. Either way whatever we discuss behind closed doors always reaches the press so in practice there isn't really a major transparency issue there.
CANDIDATE KHACHATURYAN: First, every part of my biography has always been public and part of public discussions. Second, I have always voted in favor of making internal discussions open to the press; it's the best way to avoid incorrect assumptions. Full speech here.
OPPOSITION MP: Congratulations. The ruling party intends to approve your candidacy just as they voted for you in the past for other positions. In all of those instances, you didn't mention your work at the Сорос Foundation. Now, a very interesting coincidence [drumroll... are you guys ready for this bombshell?], during the same time while you worked at Сорос foundation, in 2006-2013, you were also a U.S. Embassy employee [got 'em]. //
Nikol Pashinyan has resigned.
Tavush stretches all the way to Russia.
Bagrat srbazan becomes the Supreme Leader of Historical Soil & Water and the Generalissimos of Slow-Melting Candles... and of course removes the speed cameras from highways.
OPPOSITION MP (continues): With this biography, how do we know you are not an agent of foreign influence?
CANDIDATE KHACHATURYAN: I was not an "employee" at the Soros Foundations. Other famous figures have served on the Board [mentions a famous doctor]. Everyone who was part of the Board had duties but it was not really an "employment". As for my simultaneous work with the U.S. Justice Department, there was no conflict with my membership or presidency at the Board because the latter was fully a public activity and we were only given a symbolic sum to compensate for our expenses; we are talking about less than $100/mo. I will let you be the judge regarding an agent of influence. There is a lot that's missing from my biography that read here [lists some boring constitutional research work, etc.].
OPPOSITION MP: You keep being "promoted" by the ruling party without having the chance to finish your terms. The longest job you've ever held was at the Сорос Foundation - 8 years. The brother of the head of the Anti-Corruption Committee, who is about to join the CC, cannot be impartial. Again, what guarantees can you present that you are not a [Western] agent?
CANDIDATE KHACHATURYAN: Your expectation for guarantees stems from the assumption that the [Open Society Foundations] were engaged in activities other than the ones they were actually engaged in. I won't present any "guarantees" because there is no "threat" to begin with. As I've said, that part of my biography has always been discussed publicly and the activities were public and covered by the press.
RULING MP: In your speech you spoke about the judiciary in the U.S. and brought examples. The U.S. doesn't have a Constitutional Court. Don't you think we should also merge the Constitutional and [Cassations Court] with the upcoming referendum to have one Supreme Court with corresponding chambers?
CANDIDATE KHACHATURYAN: I support having one unified body like in the U.S., or clarifying the duties to prevent each body from interfering with the other. Lengthy answer.
OPPOSITION MP: A person [in Kirants] received permission [from USSR] to build a house and live in it. Then the [Armenian] government told him there was a mistake [after the clarification of borders]. Some 50 years after this incident, what would your verdict be in this case?
CANDIDATE KHACHATURYAN: I understand the context. This issue is the task of the Prime Minister and Foreign Minister and we cannot interfere in each other's institutions. I assume there will be a peace agreement eventually that will be sent to the Constitutional Court for examination, therefore I will refrain from making prejudgments now in order to be allowed to take part in future processes.
full video, source, source,

anti-corruption: Armenian authorities conclude that luxury Dubai property belonging to former regime MP's relative was not obtained illegally by him therefore will not be sized as part of an asset forfeiture case

Mher Sedrakyan (Tokhmakhi Mher) is a Serj-era MP whose family is going through an asset forfeiture case worth ֏7.5 billion ($19.3 million) that includes 22 real estate properties, cars, and company shares registered under his name and the names of immediate family members.
Additionally, investigative journalists recently found a luxury property in Dubai registered under the ex-MP's relative. Authorities have concluded that he is not the true ownebeneficiary of this Dubai apartment, therefore it won't be seized.
source,

the army concludes exercises for commanders

Context in May 14 news digest. The defense ministry says they have noted improvements and deficiencies and will take steps to correct them.
source,

Defense Minister Papikyan visited the frontlines and the newly built fortifications: PHOTO

The army continues to dig, asphalt, and build.
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Armenia's Foreign Minister met the head of the International Atomic Energy Agency during an international forum

ROSSI: Effective cooperation has been established between Armenia and the IAEA. We discussed several issues on the bilateral agenda, oncology and radiation medicine, safety, and reliable operation of the Armenian NPP.
MIRZOYAN: We plan to extend the lifespan of Metsamor NPP until 2036 while exploring new opportunities.
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Armenian lawyers went a strike on Tuesday to protest a bill that would move them from a turnover tax-based system to a VAT-based taxation

Context on the gray economy and why the government wants to gradually abolish the turnover tax system in May 2 news digest.
A group of lawyers said on Tuesday that their 5% turnover tax [for annual turnover under ֏119M] will become 10% this year, and in 2025 they will be required to switch to a 20% VAT/18% profit tax. The cost of legal services for many clients could increase by over 38%, they warned.
The Ombudsman and the Justice Ministry reportedly oppose this bill by the Finance Ministry.
source, source, source, source,

video shows the new payment terminals in Yerevan subway station

They plan to replace all gates next month. The Soviet-era tokens (zheton) are being replaced with QR codes, an app, and later - bank cards.
All stations will have payment terminals to purchase QR tickets. It prints out a paper with QR. Telcell's app lets you buy a ticket and instantly get a QR on the phone's screen.
Seniors who can't use "high-tech" can approach the token sellers and get a QR paper instead of a token.
video,

Yerevan will host an exhibition on Charles Aznavour’s 100th anniversary

Hundreds of rare artifacts will present the life and legacy of the legendary artist.
Location: National Museum-Institute of Architecture
Date: May 22-July 22
source,

Germany wants to purchase an Armenian man

Dortmund Borussia is interested in the services of Armenian national Edward Spertsyan as a replacement for departing Marco Reus.
During this season, midfielder Spertsyan has played 32 matches, scored 11 goals, and made 7 assists. His ass is worth €18 million.
source,

feels like It doesn’t matter what I say here. Nothing will change, nothing is important.
feel desperate to care or hurt every day im sad & unloved. wish i could just disappear and die... no one i know really cares.
i’ve thought about hurting or leaving & faking changing my old life, but the amount of effort it would take, & the safety or issues with secure documents or faking or changing one's id would or seems like a hassle if it was done. ;/ let alone the sheer effort of money income or pain with family.
some days i cry with watery eyes empty pain. if only i had Alcohol and get drunk to suffocate my pain or loneliness. being a human is & will always be horrible.
Cant even grasp these concepts or decisions aren’t what i expect or looking for as a human.... no magic life, or ideal suite home no balance or care.
why do we thrive, or try things day in and day out, into every new year or each month, when history repeats itself hoping life will change.....? it all sucks. nothing matters.
The earth gets colder & hotter, temperature and climate drops. so much cruelty suicide and homelessness is still a thing. but...yet i’m here i guess.. idk ...tbh.
Age is just pain and scars killing us every day. ;/
maybe i’ll not be loved or cared for. thats my curse.
Loneliness is deadlier then car accidents for some, & deadlier then suffering or suicide or overdose.
One who doesn’t receive love has the inability to make meaningful connections with family, friends guilt & pain, & its failure to be a good human, loneliness, and a huge dose of self suffering.
No one tells you loneliness is a killer........ No one brings you on this path to be alone, we all are alone from birth to adulthood for some of us.
People who experienced social isolation had a 32% higher risk of dying early from any cause compared with those who weren't socially isolated. Participants who reported feeling lonely were 14% more likely to die early than those who did not.
Also being overwhelmed by the futility of life and exists in a world where everyone is as sane to everyone, as people who are short to life. There isn't a place anywhere we can be at rest and we have no vivid connections or life forms to discuss it with, and if we did, why would we? I mean, what would it accomplish? It couldn't change the reality for us that there's no god, no purpose for being, and everything is an exercise in futility. It’s a slippery slope, midlife crisis gone haywire.
There is no fixing it unless you can stop the truth from being the truth.
Maybe being alone is our curse to be stuck with no love or no passion. Loneliness is like a drug it can kill you if you use too much of it. it’s like a drug, since it grows through the veins, through nerves and muscles, it assumes some right of possession over your body.
then again ;-; The universe is just a machine. It, as one says, feeds on the mediocre- the average. It creates them solely for the purpose of consuming them (literally or metaphorically) to continue on living, much like the god or gods of many religions have theoretically done with humans and their praise. However, we are simply one of those products- a happenstance creation of the broader universe, a speck of dust in the greater cosmos. And in this way, nothing we do, and nothing we experience, really 'matters' in the grand scheme of things so don’t care or do anything… so just live or don't...
idk what to do i've tried just crying.. tried meds, nothing really maters for me. i'm just a husk of a human, barely hanging on. ;=; if only i could die with my own kill switch.. l;

I’m 22M just graduated college and about to start a new job 1h away from my parents.
My mom and dad paid all of my expenses during college and I know I should give back but they ask very different things of me. My mom just wants to see me every few months which is great. She travels in her free time and we get to talk about her trip when she gets back.
On the other hand my dad always texts me and asks when I’m coming home. He’s very lonely and needs me to be there to keep his company. I have a sister but she won’t give him the time of day. My dad was very controlling during our childhood and he still tries to control us now. He’s had to spend hundreds of thousands on therapy for my sister and definitely a lot on my therapy as well. I’d always talk about my dad with my thera pists but he was the one paying them so they couldn’t really say anything much to him.
Because I just graduated, I have some time off to move out of my apartment and start a new job. I have about 4 weeks left and I’ll be spending part of it with my friends in Europe.
My dad really wants to go with me to Hawaii just me and him (my sister refused to come). I honestly don’t want to go snorkeling or go to the beach and I don’t think it will be fun to go on a trip with him. I went on a trip to Las Vegas with him a few months ago and we were both miserable (Vegas was not my idea).
I love my dad and I feel bad that he’s so lonely but I really don’t want go to Hawaii when I only have a couple weeks left with my friends before they all move to different states. WIBTA for cancelling the trip that my dad really wants to go on? I know I owe him for paying for my upbringing but I feel like I need some time away. I visit constantly because I only live an hour away.

i (23f) started dating this guy (25m) about a month and a half ago. i’ll keep it short but everything seemed to be going great right up until i injured my leg and was out of work and still am and a lot of my life got flipped upside down because a lot of my life involved fitness, physical activities and my job is being a massage therapist. My mother also is just about to lose her job so i’m going through a lot of tough situations let alone having bpd and still dealing with the death of my best friend and toxic relationship during the time of my best friends death 8 months ago.
the person i’m dating i feel is trying to understand bpd but i still don’t feel he has the best understanding but also doesn’t seem to be acknowledging the trajectory of my life right now and how difficult it is for me atm. i have tried to be very honest and upfront about my issues and problems and explain i’m in a time period right now where my bpd symptoms will probably be worse and i’m trying my hardest but i need as little added stress as possible. i struggle with sex also due to trauma and my last relationship was with a woman so i find it difficult to date men in general. but i’ve been giving it my best foot forward.
any issues we have had had been resolved but recently i had expressed my stress was really high and that i didn’t want to make things official and wanted to take things slow because i want to go back on medication and go back to therapy and sort my life before i committed to a full blown relationship. he acknowledged this and said that that was okay. a week later, he brought up the sentence “i’m there in terms of wanting a relationship so when you’re ready for it we can have that conversation”. now as someone with bpd and anxiety i started to stress because i felt i had to give an answer or just felt that i now had pressure to be on that same page or else he’s gonna abandon me. so an hour later we got ice cream and i wrote “yes” in the ice cream and it was made official. however i had expressed multiple times from the beginning i don’t like physical touch or contact and to let me at least for the foreseeable future make those advances since he’s comfortable with them and i’m not. however once i said yes i felt he got too excited and really started overstepping that boundary and touching my face and bringing me in for a kiss very frequently throughout the day and being all over me. this got me scared that now since it’s official things have changed and i’m not ready for that change because those intimacy problems need more time before i’m going to be okay with them due to trauma. so i calmly and respectfully said that same day only like 4 hours later that if it’s okay could we actually wait a little longer before making things official because i don’t think it’s the right time in my life to be committed and i have a lot of problems that are affecting me and i want to be mentally stable in order to be a healthy partner so the relationship actually has a chance of being long term which is what i want and he understandably got upset but my issue is with how upset he’s after getting.
he’s currently not talking to me because he wants space for a few days and keeps saying he’s lost and confused and he promises he’s not going to bring up the conversation at all again and he’s no longer there (in regards to wanting a relationship with me) anymore but he wants to keep dating me but he’s really hurt by me saying he’s and taking it back. i also said the next day that i low-key wish he didn’t bring it up because he knew that’s not what i wanted as we had already talked about it and i had expressed where i’m at with my life right now and it made me more stressed now because i did want to say yes but realised long term i needed to sort some stuff first before it could work but he said he was just telling me how he feels and he shouldn’t be made feel bad for expressing his feelings and he didn’t actually ask me to be his gf and didn’t actually put any pressure on me. so yeah he’s really upset with me and doesn’t want to talk for a few days which i’m allowing him to have but idk what to do or think.

I think people are smelling me because I heard a very faint comment as I walked past the woman but i am not 100% sure what if it was actually said. we haqve cubicles and the cubicles create little halls where you pass people on intersections.
Also, I had to get some official papers with other new co workers ( i am new, too), we had to sign in and I was 2nd to 5 people. I was called last, even though I signed in 2nd and I was with a group of 3, who had to wait for me because i wasnt called. And i wanted to queston that but I was too embarrassed since its infront of everyone. There, we had to sit on a row of seats to wait and I sat in between people, one thaat I WAS WITH from work. And the girl ended up changing seats once the guy with us got up when he was called to the front of us. On our way back to the office, the two girls kept looking at me weird or when I spoke she made a face.
It doesn't help I already feel insecure about my appearance and one of those girls already disliked me from the very first time she saw me. Now she has another reason to dislike me. I feel so scattered brain and stupid at my job because all I think about is I smell or what if I am smelling as they get super close.
I am doing poorly at memorizing a shit ton.
One lady who was helping me at my job, was close to me to show me something and she said she was goign to get something i need. I waited 10 minutes and went to go look for her and she was sitting in her desk and said OH I was trying to message you for you to come get them. I am not sure what that all means. She was getting something for me after helping me for 5 mins but I think she smelled me after and didnt want to go back to the room I was in to give it to me. She couldnt even message me because I am new. She was trying to get ahold of people to tell me, and its not even that far, super close same room you just have to navigate through cubicles.
Well fuck, after today, I almost cried in front of my manager. I had to restrain myself because she was training me still (alone in that room) and i think she sensed I wanted to cry. She probably thought it was because I wasnt getting the material. Which that made the whole experience worse, but its the fact that i feel like an outside, like I am unlikeable and hated towards, looked like I am disgusting. I hate my life and i actually want to kill myself
I ended up leaving work 10 minutes early because i was basically crying to myself and i felt embarrassed because one co worker next to my cubicle was asking me questions because i have to train with her tmmorw and I answered shortly and left quickly and cried while driving back home and right now i cant stop crying I spent the last 3 hours crying